#hi! I’m alive and writing things

[c0mbatchameleon]

Recoil (I believe in you even if you need to)

T | 2.9k words

It’s been 32 days since Regulus and James have exchanged a single word with one another when James knocks on his door.

(Euge bday gift fic in which regulus lets James drag him on a hike but is very mad abt it. but then he’s not mad anymore)

[hungharrington]

hmmm do you guys ever think about… how much steve would love it if you ever scratched up his back during sex <3 he. loves. it. so. bad.

honestly he treats it like he does hickies, he lurvssss getting to show off— gets all hot under the collar at the mere thought that if anyone else can see them they’ll know he’s taken, that he’s got a lover and he treat them right. it’s this perfect sweet spot between stroking his pride and catering to his possessiveness :)

the first time you notice you’ve done it (because let’s be real, you don’t notice in the moment, you’re far more focused on the perfect grind of his hips into you, fast and filthy, so good it has you clawing at his back) but the day after, when he tugs his shirt off, you spot the scratches and you’re instantly spouting apologies.

your hands flit over his back, worried that you’ve hurt him and he’s like, “no no no! it’s— i’m fine and- uh, how do i say this? please, um, always do that.” he can’t even pretend to hide how much he loves it and that makes you feel better, makes you glow hot inside.

eddie notices one time when you’re all over at the harrington house, using the pool to cool off. right as steve tugs his shirt off over his head, eddie catches sight of the red scratches where your nails have raked down the tan expanse of his back and whistles loudly, “damn, harrington, you share a bed with a wild animal lately?” like he doesn’t know damn well where those marks came from.

his quick glance at you confirms it and you can’t help but feel a little bashful but steve’s already scoffing, a little smug and a lil pink in the cheeks from how proud he is and he jerks a thumb over his shoulder and is like, “actually, it means i got a good grade in sex :)”

[tariah23]

So sugar baby Gojo is canon btw

[javierduffy]

in my head, kieran survived the o’driscoll kidnapping, but by the time he’d got back to shady belle after someone found him bleeding out in the street and took him to the doctor, the gang was gone, and he took the opportunity to escape the gang lifestyle, running off to strawberry and beginning work with the timber folks

years later, you can find him at pronghorn ranch in epilogue 1, lovingly tending to the horses in the barn when you go to scoop the manure, and he’s made an honest living for himself. and the o’driscolls are gone because sadie killed then all and he is finally safe and happy is anyone listening can anyone hear me

[yellowsubiesdance]

i think i’ve learned a lot when it comes to not applying my own values to the media i consume

for my script analysis class yesterday, we discussed two gentleman from verona, and nearly every classmate of mine was up in arms about how sexist the story is.

and i'm not saying it's not, or that it's not infuriating to read. but i'm also not putting my energy into getting upset about something written 500 or so years ago. and i'm not about to put my own beliefs onto these characters that are not me. i'm going to let their choices speak for themselves, and interpret it in the context of the story.

all that said, this now brings me to the point of alastor in episode 5, and how viscerally people are responding to it. those of you up in arms about the choices he’s making, and the violent threat he gave husk, you’re missing the entire point of his character, of this place they’re in, of the story being told. he’s an overlord, and he became an overlord by killing much bigger overlords and broadcasting their deaths over the radio.

HE IS NOT A GOOD PERSON.

if you started this show with the belief that every character working the hotel is a good person, you’re in the wrong place. watch the good place if you’re looking for a good wholesome story about getting dead sinners into heaven, because that’s not what this show is about.

you’re more than welcome to hate him after seeing the way he exerted power over a being whose soul he owns, but you’re doing the media you’re watching a disservice by writing it off so quickly. if you don’t like to be uncomfortable watching media, watch something else. this is an uncomfortable show, it handles uncomfortable topics, and it’s going to be an uncomfortable ride, and if you’re not up for something like that, then you should take a break from it and pick up something else. you don’t have to get online and defend your own ideals while you watch a show that goes against your ideals.

[unfinishedslurs]

soulmarks (stobin)

Robin is born with bruises on her knees. 

Her parents tell the story all the time. We were so worried, they say, but the doctors told us it was normal. Her soulmate must have just been learning to walk. That poor boy must have been quite the adventurer, the bruises never ceased! 

As she gets older, the odd marks keep showing up. On her hips, her arms, her shins. She’s sure she’s leaving her fair share of marks on them, too. They’re clumsy, both of them. 

When she’s eight, a set of fingers are clear around her wrist. Her parents look at each other sadly and murmur about things Robin doesn’t quite understand. 

They ask her to tell them if she ever gets a mark like that again. None ever appear. Their relief is obvious. 

Her mother sits her down. “When you meet your soulmate,” she tells Robin, “make sure he knows he is always welcome in our home.”

Robin thought it would be obvious. What’s hers is theirs, after all, and vise versa. Two halves of the same soul.

As she gets older, the idea rakes at her. Make sure he knows, her mother said. He is always welcome. 

She doesn’t know if it would be the same, if her soulmate was a girl. They have to be. After all, Robin is realizing, there’s no way her soulmate is a boy. 

When she’s fifteen, bruises appear on her face and knuckles and her mother shrieks at the sight of her. Robin just sits, quietly reeling. Girls don’t get in fights like this, she thinks numbly. Girls don’t…

That evening, three gashes scar across her body. Somehow she already knows they’ll be permanent. She cries herself to sleep. 

She keeps her head down, and barely even hears about the fight Steve Harrington got into with Jonathan Byers. It doesn't matter. She’s got bigger concerns than Steve Harrington. 

Things are quiet for the next year. Hardly any bruises, which makes her happy and upset in equal measure. She doesn’t know why the universe would do this to her. Why would it give her someone she can never fall in love with? Maybe the universe is homophobic, she thinks, but doesn’t laugh. It sure fucking feels like it. 

She tries to leave less bruises on them, too, as an avoidance technique. It doesn’t work. She’s got soccer practice, and marching band, and she runs into a pole when a pretty girl smiles at her across the street. Dammit. 

November comes back around, and with it, new marks. 

They’re awful. 

It starts out with a couple of scratches that look similar to the three from last year that she still wears. Then her mom has to watch, horrified, as new bruises appear on her face. When she pulls her shirt up, they’re on her ribs. Worse than they’ve ever been. 

She pretends to be too sick to go to school for the two days it takes for them to fade, to avoid the questions and the gossip. Last year was bad enough, after someone started a rumor her soulmate was in a gang. 

Something that doesn’t fade is the thin scar along her hairline. She pulls her hair down to cover it, and swears quietly at whoever the universe decided to gift her. 

(She worries about them all the time.)

[goldkirk]

.

[salparadiselost]

Y’all why the heck do I write things that hurt my own heart

[beeflare]

My TikTok FYP reminded me about the Durins and now I’m sad

They’re my little babies

[tenitchyfingers]

I have found this just now and have actively been losing my mind over this like one of those Loki fans in the early 2010s like

his FACE. He knows something we don’t and he’s TRYING to not say anything.

“I know that there’s been a lot of effort to establish that Stu is still alive in the last movie”

“They’re shooting Scream right now and I’m not in Scream right now. Right now I’m not in Scream, right now I’m in San Diego” (this video was posted in February but it’s sure that it was shot during SDCC 2022 which means he was talking about Scream VI, not anything in the future and him repeating he’s not in Scream RIGHT NOW doesn’t exclude he’ll be in Scream sometime in the future)

So, me, once again:

[musings-of-the-void]

If you tore open my chest you’d find my heart

Beating beating beating like each beat will be its last

Trapped in the cage of my ribs

The cage of my life

My lungs, a lifeless gray

Struggle to inflate

I gasp for breath, though there is no visible obstruction

If you tore me open just to see me I might thank you

As fucked up as that is

I want to be seen I want to be known I want to be understood

And how can you see me if you can’t see the bloody redness of my insides

The wildness of my heart

The messy humanness of my very being?

My heart is beating beating beating but I live

I breathe

My lungs are screaming screaming screaming but there will

Be peace

I am living I am human I am real

And the messiness is only proof

The fear is only proof

I’m afraid because I’m alive

What is there to fear once you’ve died?

(I’m morbid after 11, as you see)

I will breathe tomorrow

My heart will beat tomorrow

I will live I will live I will live

I will look back someday

And the fear will seem only flavor

I will live

[yourlocalmissingtexture]

Edgy longing/lovelorn poem from three years ago (Nov. 10, 2020) ayeeee

The Fool

What nerve you have!

To long after he

That drinks the joy of a thousand poppies

While you offer but your heart,

A joy in which he must open not his veins,

But his mind to understand.

[loverofallthingssmart]

miles morales is so everything to me.

[thewingedwolf]

i watched everything i needed to in order to watch the new episode of the mandolorian and

man, they really just gave two whole episodes of boba fett’s solo series to din, grogu, and Uncanny Valley Luke Skywalker huh, and it wasn’t even a good two episodes, they just made Ming Na Wen and Temuera Morrison give up two episodes of their lil mayoral race slash planetary drug war tv show so The Mandalorian could remind them who pays the goddamn bills around here (it’s the puppet, the cute green puppet pays the bills) and shove like an entire season’s worth of emotional arc and plot into two tacked on episodes of someone else’s show. genius.

[cleolinda]

AITA for banning my husband and father in law from the delivery room due to their intensely stressful/creepy behavior during my pregnancy?

There’s a famous Reddit post from 2020 where a pregnant woman wrote that her husband and father-in-law were a little too comfortable with their certainty that she was absolutely going to die in childbirth just like her husband’s late mother. It was to the point where her FIL was insisting that she go ahead and put all her clothes into storage, because she was obviously going to die in the hospital and it would save them the grief of packing up her things afterwards. Like. It was WILD.

When I tell my husband [that she feels suspicious of her FIL], he calls me paranoid, but I feel like my FIL WANTS me to die; his whole life identity for the past 35 years has been “amazing single dad” (never dated or had close friends or even hobbies really), and it seems like he’s looking forward to being able to guide my husband through what he went through. At this point, I’d honestly be happy to never see my FIL again, and I certainly don’t want him in the delivery room, especially since he told me he was “putting [his] foot down” about me not being “allowed” to have an epidural…. My husband, in addition to backing his dad on everything, acts like my due date is my death date, and has completely pulled away from me.

The commenters (and me, honestly) were convinced that the husband and FIL were either going to kill her outright to fulfill this expectation, or just make decisions about her care that might conveniently let her die.

And then she never posted again.

Over the last four years, people have frequently mentioned that post, always leading to a thread of people saying, “Oh god, I still worry about that woman.” I did too. It became one of those famous unresolved posts that people always wondered about.

Until yesterday, when someone on r/BestOfRedditorUpdates dug up a 2022 update she had posted on a different account:

TLDR; I had a beautiful and healthy baby girl, and I divorced my ex-husband. I lived, obviously.

She writes that she put her foot down about having her own mother in the delivery room rather than her FIL (!), and she WOULD be getting an epidural. Her husband lost his shit. And in his outburst, he let slip--

I admittedly lost my temper, and told him that I wasn’t going to die- it wasn’t my fault his father’s trauma wormed it’s way into his head, and that he needed to fix it without taking it out on me. He yelled at me that he didn’t need therapy. That caught me a little off guard; I asked him why he went to his therapist and was given advice about my death if he felt he didn’t need it. His expression gave it away, and he caved not long after. It turns out there was no therapist. It was just his dad. During the times he was supposed to be at therapy, he was with his dad. I’m still fuming.

And that was when she got the fuck out.

I’ll wrap this up- I’ve got an adorable little toddler tugging at my leg atm. I’m alive, I’m happy, and I’ve got my baby in my arms. Life is good.

I truly never thought we'd see a resolution to this, and I feel like there's probably a good number of people who remember it, so I thought you might want to know.

ETA: Brilliantly, I put the link in at the top; here it is again for convenience.

[theauthorinblue]

I have officially found the weirdest way of getting catharsis for my frustrations: by threatening my OC by making him go get bacon in attempt to get out of a conversation with his best friend from twenty years ago!