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mccall-muffin · 11 months ago

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Love vs. Hate - Part 24 // Joe Liebgott x OC

Summary: Just as Liv was finally reunited with Joe, they are being separated once more. Her only light - Don. But then the horrors of war show their ugly face once more.

Warnings: Language, war wounds, loss

A/N: Have I already said that I kinda *hate* writing these things in Bastogne... It makes me feel sad :( And it only gets worse guys.

Here is my Masterlist

Taglist: @brassknucklespeirs, @liebgotts-lovergirl, @lieutenant-speirs, @mads-weasley, @emmylindersson

Late in the afternoon on January 3, we returned to our old position in the woods overlooking Foy. And it was a massacre. I walked next to Don, looking around, wondering what kind of hell the men must've been through.

"Holy fuck", I breathe and look at Don, who frowns.

Suddenly, we hear Joe Toye behind us, calling out. "You gotta be fucking kidding me. Someone's gonna die. Someone's gonna fucking die. Guarnere, look at this shit!"

I walked over to Joe. "What's got your panties in a bunch, Joe?"

"One of those 1st Battalion fuckers took a dump in my foxhole", he answers, and I lift my eyebrow, looking at him.

"I think they shit in everyone's foxhole, Joe," Bill chimes in and looks around. We are all thinking the same, as Bill says it. "I don't think they wanted to spend much time above ground."

While we were in the Bois Jacques, the Germans had been shelling our old position. There were signs of tree bursts everywhere. That got our attention.

As I navigate my way back to the foxhole that Don, Bill, and I have begrudgingly come to call 'home', the weight of command sits heavily on my shoulders, yet the camaraderie among us offers a peculiar comfort in this hellscape. The sight of the shattered woods, a grim reminder of the fury unleashed upon us, fails to dampen the spirit of defiance that binds us together.

Settling into the cramped space with Don, I catch him casting a sidelong glance, the kind that speaks volumes without a word needing to be passed between us. "I meant to ask you before... How did it go with Babe?" he finally inquires, his voice a mix of concern and curiosity. The question hangs in the air, a ghost of our last mission that had almost broken us.

Taking a deep breath, I recount the ordeal, not sparing the details of the harrowing decision to retreat under fire, leaving Julian's body behind. It was a moment that tested us all, pushing us to the brink of what we thought we could endure. "Babe was... devastated," I begin, the memory still fresh, painful. "He thought we'd left Julian behind for good. That we'd abandoned not just a fellow soldier, but a promise."

I pause, the weight of leadership and the decisions it forces upon you never getting lighter, only more familiar. "But we went back for him," I continue, the resolve in my voice mirroring the determination that had surged through us that day. "Took a few men, dodged more bullets than I care to count, and we got Julian. Got him and his belongings," I add, the tangible proof of our success being the personal effects we managed to salvage — a class ring, a wallet, and a watch, symbols of a life cut tragically short.

Don listens intently, his expression a mix of relief and respect. "And Babe?" he probes further, knowing all too well the emotional turmoil that must have followed.

A small smile tugs at my lips as I remember Babe's reaction. "Let's just say, he was more than relieved. He hugged me so tight I thought he might never let go," I admit, the raw emotion of the moment breaking through the soldier's facade I've had to maintain. "He understood then, the choices we have to make. That sometimes leadership isn't about the hard call, but about going back to make things right, even when the odds are against us."

Don nudges me gently, breaking the silence that had settled between us as we took refuge in the dimly lit foxhole, the sounds of war a constant echo in the background. "So, you finally saw Joe again, huh?" he asks, a hint of mischief in his tone, but not without a genuine interest. His gaze drifts to the scar beneath my eye, a permanent reminder of the war's brutality, now seen by Joe for the first time.

With a heavy sigh, I nod, the memory of the encounter flooding back with vivid clarity. "Yeah, I did," I start, the cold of the night biting at my skin, yet the warmth of the memory offering a temporary respite. "He... he saw this," I gesture to my scar, the words trailing off as the image of Joe stepping closer, his hand gently lifting my chin to meet his gaze, replays in my mind.

Don, sensing the depth of the moment, leans in closer, the flicker of interest in his eyes now mixed with concern. "How'd that go?" he prods gently, rolling a cigarette between his fingers, a habit that offers him a semblance of normalcy in the chaos that surrounds us.

Taking a deep breath, I let the scenes unfold, painting the picture of that raw, vulnerable exchange. "It was intense," I confess, the cold seeping through the fabric of my uniform doing little to dampen the warmth that memory ignites within me. "He just... wrapped me in his arms, Don. Said the only thing that mattered was that I was alive, standing in front of him." The words tumble out, a mix of awe and disbelief at the depth of emotion Joe had displayed.

The mention of tears and the overwhelming comfort found in Joe's embrace brings a softness to Don's usually playful demeanor. "God damn," he murmurs, lighting the cigarette now perched between his lips, the glow briefly illuminating his face in the darkness. "Sounds like a goddamn movie scene, Sweetheart."

I chuckle, despite the seriousness of our conversation. "Felt like it, too," I admit, the reality of the war creeping back as the sound of distant artillery fire reminds us of our present. "He said he missed me, Don. That he couldn't stop thinking about me. And I... I told him the same."

Don takes a drag from his cigarette, the smoke curling into the night air, a silent testament to our shared anxieties and fears. "You two are something else, you know that?" he says, exhaling slowly. "Fucking war tearing everything apart, and here you two are, finding your way back to each other."

The conversation shifts then, to the uncertainty of tomorrow, the constant danger we face, and the stark reality that any moment could be our last. Yet, in recounting that moment with Joe, a glimmer of hope flickers to life in the depths of my heart.

"Yeah," I agree, a wistful smile playing on my lips. The weight of Joe's words, the promise of a future uncertain yet filled with the possibility of moments stolen from the clutches of war, settles around us like a blanket, offering a semblance of comfort in the cold.

Don nods, his expression softening. "You hang onto that, Sweetheart. Whatever this fucking war throws at us, you hang onto that hope." He flicks the remnants of his cigarette into the darkness, the ember briefly lighting up the night before fading into oblivion.

"Yeah," I whisper, the resolve strengthening within me. "Together."

And as we sit in silence, the camaraderie between us a steadfast anchor amidst the chaos, I can't help but cling to the promise of a future where the war is but a distant memory, and love, in all its forms, triumphs over the desolation that seeks to consume us.

The sudden appearance of Lip cuts through the night like a knife, his voice low but firm as he reminds us of the noise and light discipline. The reminder snaps us back to reality, the gravity of our situation pressing down like a physical weight. "Don, Bill, Liv, keep it down," he says, a sharp edge to his voice that brooks no argument. "Liv, need you to make a few rounds, check on everyone."

Without a moment's hesitation, I nod, understanding the necessity of his request. "Got it, Lip," I respond, my tone equally serious. Pulling my jacket tighter around me, I step out into the cold night, the air crisp and unforgiving as I begin my rounds, the solemn responsibility of checking on my brothers-in-arms weighing heavily on my shoulders.

The camp is eerily quiet as I move from foxhole to foxhole, the muted whispers of my comrades barely breaking the silence. The tension is palpable, a silent testament to the constant threat looming over us. And then, without warning, the ominous sound of incoming bombings shatters the stillness, a terrifying harbinger of chaos.

"Incoming!" My voice cuts through the night, a desperate warning as I sprint back towards our foxhole. The echo of Lip's voice amplifies the alarm, his command carrying across the camp with urgency. "Get to cover!" he yells, mirroring my own panic.

Don's voice reaches me next, laced with concern and fear. "Liv!" he calls out, the single word a plea for my safety. My heart races, adrenaline surging as I navigate the treacherous path back, the sounds of explosions growing closer with each passing second.

Finally, I slip into our foxhole, the familiar faces of Don and Bill a sight for sore eyes. "I'm here," I pant, barely catching my breath as we huddle together, bracing for the impact. The world outside explodes into chaos, the deafening roar of bombs tearing through the night, obliterating everything in their path. We cling to each other, a desperate bid for comfort in the face of impending doom.

And then, as suddenly as it began, silence falls, a haunting absence of sound that is almost more terrifying than the bombardment itself. We remain still, barely daring to breathe, the aftermath of the attack settling around us like a heavy blanket. The smoke, the debris, the stench of explosives hanging in the air—it's a scene from a nightmare, yet all too real.

Don's hand finds mine in the darkness, his grip tight and reassuring. Bill is beside us, his presence a silent pillar of strength. We don't need words; our shared experiences, the bond forged in the crucible of war, speak volumes. In this moment, in the aftermath of terror, we are reminded of the fragility of life and the unbreakable bond that ties us together.

The silence that envelops us in the aftermath of the bombing is suffocating, a stark contrast to the chaos that had reigned moments before. We're left in a limbo, the uncertainty of whether it's truly over hanging heavy in the air. Don, ever the proactive one among us, breaks the tense silence first. "We should check if anyone was hit," he suggests, his voice low but filled with concern.

Bill, however, is quick to remind us of the grim reality we face. "That's exactly what they want, Malark" he counters, his tone grave. "For us to pop our heads up so they can pick us off." The wisdom in his words is undeniable, a hard-earned lesson from countless nights just like this one. Yet, the tension between the need to help our brothers and the instinct for self-preservation is palpable.

Then, cutting through the night, a sound none of us can ignore reaches our ears—a whimper, followed by painful moaning and then desperate cries for help. It's a sound that chills to the bone, the unmistakable voice of a man in agony.

"You hear that?" asks Don.

"Is that Joe?" adds Bill, and the three of us look in the direction the cries for help are coming from.

Recognition dawns on us simultaneously; it's Joe Toye. The realization hits like a physical blow, the urgency to act clashing with the knowledge of the risk involved.

Bill's reaction is immediate; his decision is made the moment he recognizes the voice of his best friend. "I'm going to check on him," he declares, determination etching his features. It's a testament to the bonds forged in the heat of battle, the unspoken vow to never leave a man behind.

But as he makes to move, I reach out, grabbing his arm in a desperate attempt to hold him back. "Bill, it's too dangerous," I plead, the fear of losing another person close to me making my voice tremble. The thought of Bill—or anyone else—venturing out into what could very well be a death trap is unbearable.

Bill, however, is unwavering, the resolve in his eyes unshakable. "I can't leave him out there," he states firmly, his voice laced with an emotion that brooks no argument. It's a declaration of loyalty, of the deep-seated belief that we are all we have out here, the only family within reach amidst the horrors of war.

The conflict within me is torturous. The strategic part of my mind screams that Bill's impulse, while noble, could lead to disaster. Yet, the human part, the part that has seen too much death and too much suffering, understands all too well. In this hellish landscape, where tomorrow is never promised, the bonds of friendship, of brotherhood, become our strongest lifeline.

As Bill prepares to brave the unknown for Joe, the weight of command, of responsibility, bears down on me. It's a harrowing reminder of the choices we are forced to make and the risks we take for those we consider family. In the end, all we can do is cover for him, pray, and wait, hoping against hope that both Bill and Joe make it back to us. The reality of war spares no one, but it's in these moments of selfless bravery that the true strength of our bonds is tested.

The night turns into a living nightmare as Bill disappears into the darkness, his determination to reach Joe pushing him beyond the relative safety of our foxhole. The minutes stretch into an agonizing eternity, each second ticking by with the weight of a lifetime. And then, as if the very heavens conspire against us, another barrage of bombings rains down, each explosion closer, more ferocious than the last.

Don reacts instinctively, pulling me close, our bodies pressed tightly together in a futile attempt to offer each other some semblance of protection. The ground shakes beneath us, the air filled with the deafening roar of explosions and the ear-splitting shrieks of incoming artillery. We're caught in the maelstrom, powerless against the fury unleashed around us.

As the cacophony dies down, leaving behind a ringing silence, my frustration and fear boil over. "Fucking hell, Bill's a goddamn idiot," I grumble into the darkness, anger laced with dread at the thought of what might have happened to him and Joe. My heart races, pounding against my chest as if trying to escape the inevitable truth of war's cruelty.

Don, ever the voice of reason even in the midst of chaos, catches the shift in my posture. "Where the hell do you think you're going?" he asks, his voice tight with concern.

But before I can answer, a desperate call pierces the night, cutting through the remnants of explosions and the heavy silence that follows. "Medic!" The call, repeated, becomes a beacon, guiding me towards the source, towards my duty.

"Doing my job," I say, a determined edge to my voice as I pull away from Don's protective embrace. "Stay down," I instruct him and the others I pass, each step taking me closer to the unknown.

Then, almost colliding with Lip in the dim light, I barely register his presence before the sight before us brings me to a standstill. My blood turns to ice, the scene unfolding like a grotesque tableau of war's indiscriminate brutality. There lie Bill and Joe Toye, their bodies a testament to the horror of what we're fighting against. Joe's leg is a mangled mess, blown off from the knee down, while Bill's is similarly destroyed, the carnage nearly too much to comprehend.

"Fucking hell," the words escape me, a whisper lost in the chaos. The reality hits hard, the sight of two of my brothers reduced to this state, igniting a fury and sorrow so profound it threatens to overwhelm me.

But this is no time for despair. Shaking off the shock, I kneel beside them, my training taking over as I try to assist Doc Roe with assessing their injuries. The urgency is palpable, every second counting as I help to stabilize them, to do what I can amidst the madness.

This is the reality of war, a reality we live day in and day out. It's brutal, unforgiving, and indiscriminate in its cruelty.

As Doc Roe and I work in tandem, the urgency of the situation tying our movements together with practiced efficiency, Bill's voice cuts through the tension. "Gimme a smoke, would ya?" he asks, his voice strained but tinged with that unmistakable Philly accent, rough around the edges but familiar in its resilience.

Without hesitation, I fish out a cigarette from my pack, lighting it and placing it gently between his lips. Turning to Joe, I offer him one as well, our eyes meeting in a silent exchange of solidarity and understanding. The simple act, mundane under any other circumstances, takes on a profound significance here amidst the snow and blood.

I can't help but glance back at Bill, a mix of admonishment and relief in my eyes. "Told you it was too fucking dangerous," I say, the words heavy with the weight of what could have been lost. But Bill, even in pain, manages a laugh, a sound that carries more warmth than the cold night air could ever leech from us.

"Sweetheart, you know me..." he says, the term carrying with it the weight of all the battles we've fought together, a testament to the bond forged in the crucible of war. It's a farewell, though neither of us says it, as he's loaded onto a stretcher and carried away, his silhouette disappearing into the night.

Joe follows soon after, the severity of his injuries casting a pall over the makeshift triage area. As he's taken away, the reality of the situation, the sheer brutality and randomness of it all, finally hits. I'm left kneeling in the snow, the cold seeping through my uniform, a stark reminder of the harshness of our existence.

The hand that falls on my shoulder is both unexpected and immensely comforting. Don, his presence a steady constant in the ever-changing chaos of war, stands beside me, his own grief and concern mirrored in his eyes. Don, like me, was close with Guarnere and Toye, the bonds of brotherhood tying us all together in ways that words can scarcely describe.

"Fucking hell, Liv," he murmurs, his voice a mix of anger, sorrow, and exhaustion. "This is a goddamn mess." His grip tightens, a silent show of support, of shared pain and determination to keep moving forward, no matter the cost.

"Yeah, it is," I reply, my voice low, the enormity of the night's events settling in. Together, we stand in silence, a moment of mourning for what's been lost and what's still at stake. The war rages on, indifferent to the lives it upends, the dreams it shatters.

But in this moment, there's a silent vow made between us, a promise to keep fighting, not just for our survival, but for those who can no longer stand beside us. The bond we share, strengthened by adversity, becomes our beacon in the darkness, guiding us forward in a world torn asunder by war.

As we help each other up, ready to face whatever comes next, the resolve in our hearts is clear. We will endure, we will fight, and we will remember. For Bill, for Joe, for all those we've lost. This is our burden, our honor, and our duty.

As I look up, I see George standing there, still looking down at the place where Bill and Joe just lay. I walk up to him and put my hand on his shoulder when Lip walks up to us.

"How's Buck?" he asks, and we all look over to where Buck is sitting on a log, rubbing his face. George doesn't answer. "Luz, how's Buck?"

"He- He's fine." George finally answers, and Lip looks at me.

"You sure?", Lip asks.

"Yes, he's fine," George repeats and looks at Lip.

I sigh deeply, my gaze wandering to Buck once more before I look back at Lip. "I think you should probably go talk to him now."

Lip looks back at me and slowly nods. "All right."

#Band of Brothers #Joe Liebgott x OC #Joe Liebgott #Don Malarkey #Band of Brothers fanfic #Bobedit #hbo war #hbo series #bob #Joe Liebgott fanfic #Part 24 #Love vs. Hate #Joe Toye #Bill Guarnere

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the-priestess-of-dawn · 8 months ago

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Since I've been thinking about fe12 recently naturally I started thinking about my favorite fe12 character Katarina (she's like... my 4th favorite for fe overall, but since Grima/Robin and Chrom are number 1 and 2 and SO far ahead of everyone else that it's kind of unfair, she's basically second place when it comes to characters who have NOT infected me with constant and irremediable brainrot).

Specifically I'm thinking about how the scene she has with Marth when she joins and how if she had her way she would have had Marth execute her, but...

"You're just running from your sins." MARTH GO OFF!!!

"If you truly regret what you've done, then live. I want you to atone with your life, not your death." YES MARTH DESTROY THE REDEMPTION IN DEATH TROPE!!!

Look, Marth might not be my most beloved fe protagonist of all time, but he gets MAJOR points for this conversation ALONE. And honestly it is all the more tragic how his descendants get so caught up in the cycle of violence and vengeance when Marth already understood that justice does not mean killing everyone who has done you wrong. Oh BOY did the exalted line ever lose the plot there.

I know Lucina is the one who gets compared to Marth most, and Tiki even says that Chrom is more similar to one of Marth's ancestors than Marth himself, but honestly Chrom's "You are yourself, before you are any man's son/daughter." really does echo "You will think for yourself and find your own answer." I think Marth would be really proud of him for that response to finding out his best friend is the child of someone who came to assassinate his sister.

And, haha, speaking of Grima brainrot...

I REALLY WISH CHROM HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO SAY SOMETHING LIKE THIS TO ROBIN, YOU KNOW???

Ugh, Robin my beloved. I want to freeze time, like, right here

Okay, not necessarily here. This is... fair enough for a heroic sacrifice...

Uh-huh, this tracks...

There! Can we freeze right there? Robin what the FUCK are you saying? These two lines why I can never be at peace with the sacrifice ending no matter how you frame the narrative. "It's only right" that Robin dies with Grima??? No. No!

See, if it weren't for that specific line, we could just accept that Robin is doing something they don't really want to do and that they know will hurt people because they truly believe it's the only way to truly protect the future, but... no. When they say "It's only right we meet our end together." it becomes something else. Is this REALLY the only way to protect the people of the future (Chrom doesn't think it is. The rest of the Shepherds don't think it is either, which you can see from their lines if you choose to let Chrom land the final blow) or are you just trying to run from your past life, Robin? To escape the weight of what you've done and what you see now that you're capable of doing all over again? Is there anything heroic or even "sacrificial" if saving the world is just the convenient excuse for getting rid of yourself?

Chrom would agree with Marth's feelings. He would say "If you truly regret what you've done, then live." But he CAN'T because Robin did not reveal this extremely distressing line of thinking until the absolute last second before landing the final blow on Grima and ensuring their own death. Of course Chrom would never speak a word against Robin after that. Frankly, I think he was kind of robbed. (And kind of on purpose... When you think about it, is there really THAT much difference between Grima trying to make Robin look like a tragic hero by offering that yes/no choice to submit to them vs Robin becoming a tragic hero by "sacrificing" themself at the end of a grand final battle?)

Anyway, I would absolutely love to see a Robin/Katarina harmonic in FEH someday... I think if that ever happened, Katarina would probably say something about Robin reminding her of Kris (because Avatars) but really, Robin is so much like her that I'd just love to see them talk to each other about literally anything.

(Also, on a slightly tangential note... I know that in canon, Robin strikes Chrom with Thoron at the Dragon's Table, but I feel like as a fandom we are really missing out by not taking some artistic liberties and making it Katarina's Bolt instead. I mean. The SYMBOLISM. Especially when it comes to good timeline Robin, who might think to bring that tome to the Dragon's Table instead of Thoron because it has lower might.)

#katarina #marth #fe12 #fe13 #sorry this is less an essaypost and more just rambling but... i had too much to say to just put it on twitter like i normally would #yes i'm raging against awakening's sacrifice ending again. it probably won't be the last time. sorry i just... hate it but... it's so juicy

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knoxs2nd · 1 year ago

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i feel like the resident george/shannon and jessica/kanon apologist but it bugs me to treat them as lesser than yasu's relationship with battler when a big part of yasu being more closed off to them is because she has relationship trauma from battler.

yasu was so open with battler because he was her first love. she felt comfortable sharing about herself, telling him in her own way that she loved him, and just...being herself! meanwhile, with george and jessica, it's this whole dance of maintaining distance to avoid hurt

yasu has HUGE issues with taking their love confessions seriously or showing that she might even return those feelings in any meaningful way. george tells her he means to propose and shannon doesn't really say much because that sounds like making a promise to be broken. back when battler told shannon about his plan to take her away she immediately responded that she'd be waiting for him. with george and jessica, though, yasu doesn't say anything or actively pushes them away even though she loves them back.

also talking about just how comfortable yasu is with sharing about herself with george and jessica...not much! just more potential avenues to maybe connect with them further and fall in love with them!

yasu wanted love but also was scared of falling in love after being hurt...a huge theme of the series is how love is all-consuming. yasu trying to hedge her love like that hurt her further, because she felt like she could never be truly loved or understood for her true self.

george/shannon and kanon/jessica are just. post-relationship trauma yasu. trauma really makes you feel like you can never connect with others in the same way huh. this is who she is and how she involves herself in relationships now...

i do love how ep6 is so devoted to showing how george/shannon jessica/kanon and battler/beatrice are "equal." not really talking about beabato here but for george/shannon and kanon/jessica it's about shannon and kanon being more open, sharing about themselves, and talking about their feelings!!

shannon shares cute stories from her childhood! she talks about her own past! kanon tells jessica that yeah, actually he really does like her! sure, he'd love to learn music with her and connect over a shared hobby!

tohya's showing yasu how these new relationships she started after being hurt by love and feeling like she can never, ever have the same sort of pure untainted love she'd experienced in her childhood...can still flourish and be loving and fulfilling relationships...

also, the magic ending in all this? pain

to yasu, battler represents her pure, untainted, pre-trauma feelings towards love and being accepted. when he accepts her, yasu rejects it saying, essentially, she's too sinful and traumatized now to experience that sort of love. she can never return to the person she was before, who would have eagerly and happily accepted battler's feelings. the person she is now, has to reject him and free him to live his own life through jumping off the boat.

the fact that it was battler is so tragic. why did it have to be the person who saw yasu and who reminded her of her younger, happier, hopeful, past self.

battler's trying to offer yasu her future but all she can see is her past.

her past self no longer exists and no longer can be be loved. her future self shouldn't exist and shouldn't be allowed to be loved. so, of course, yasu rejects battler and the acceptance he represents, believing the best she can do is preserve this catbox and this precious moment she feels she can be loved.

#character: jessica #character: kanon #character: george #character: shannon #character: battler #character: yasu #favorite #episode: 6 #episode: 8

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a-mel-tomelts · 2 years ago

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IN THE CASE OF FUTABA SAKURA.

My change of the narrative for personal satisfaction and preferable writing and plot. I tried to make it as close to the character we all know and love and I hope I didn't disappoint!

No dumb: "Change of heart cured depression" thing.

The scene when she enters Leblanc on the anniversary of her mother's death(? Or was it b-day? I don't even remember.) — Horrendous.

My version: instead of coming, Futaba CALLS SOJIRO and asks him to come, she feels better but hungry, bringing Ren along.

She says that she became scared to be taken away from Sojiro which is why she contacted Ren from an anonymous number and asked him about the prosecutor lady's situation. Through chatting both became somewhat acquaintances. Ren was supportive of Futaba these past months and she felt more comfortable with him.

Bc, did we explain to Sojiro how we know Futaba? Or did he accept it Sae told us and decided to ignore it?

But that's not the point.

The biggest problem was Futaba's attitude after awakening. So...

She is still herself but she is a bit better because she has no guilt for her mother's death. She is still dead, yeah. But at least it is less heavy when Futaba knows it's not her fault and now she has a better purpose as well as more people supporting her. (With time, of course)

So, they talk in her room.

2: On days of Thieves getting to know Futaba better, Ann AND Makoto are the pair. Makoto talks about how she adored her father that died tragically. While Ann, explains her behaviour before because of Shiho's suicide attempt and how nobody could help her. And Ann adores Shiho because only she understood her.

And you know what?? Futaba as well had a parent she respected and loved as well as a friend who she had lost contact with. Literally her Confidant! Why we don't discuss trauma? It's okay and healthy to talk about it (of course there are boundaries about it but IMO Futaba needs to know there are people who support and understand her)

With Ryuji and Yusuke, Futaba feels better about embracing her geeky nature. We have the most outgoing and friendly boy who loves games and unhealthy food as much as Futaba and they both hate coffee. They are bound to become bros.

And Yusuke is eccentric. We know how it goes for them in the original. I love their companionship. Dunno about shipping but they are helluva cute and the same can be said in dancing games.

So yeah, girls for emotional parts and boys for the bro support.

Both these things I bet are alien to this isolated girl but very much needed.

Feel free to add your own opinion or experience. These points above are taken from my experience with GAD and how having friends that accept me and are similar to me helped me to pull through school.

Of course, Futaba's situation is more severe but I think after the change of heart she felt lighter from self-guilt and the feeling of being unwanted — these are the main reasons for her distortion after all.

Idk how to write about the loss of a parent/close people. So, I would prefer to ignore this topic. It's bad but I can't write it. Personally, I am numb to that experience but Futaba is emotional about her dead mom.

3: Beach with Futaba. While the animated cutscene was cute the game sequence itself was lacklustre. So um... Futaba content where??? She is at the end for nickname picking but uhhhh. For what reason we are here? We have Hawaii in less than a few weeks. Why couldn't we do smth simpler and more emotionally impactful? Without getting used to ordinary places, people are getting anxious somewhere new. So, going to a beach seemed very out of blue.

Why couldn't we get a Leblanc party where Ren AND Sojiro wear masks so Futaba could feel more accepted about her masks from a few days ago? Sojiro could be someone from his childhood, so Ren and Futaba could go "Huh?"; "What a boomer". It's cute and fun and we see Sojiro's reaction to socializing Futaba

Futaba instead of wearing her uncomfortably big mask could wear Feathermen along with Ren! And it would be okay! And then other Thieves would join with THEIR cosplays!!

And it all would end with a small fireworks stick (i forgot their name) bc welp, the summer festival was ruined, but AT LEAST, this time we are together and here's a picture of us taken by Ren! Who then, sends it to "busy" Akechi!

....who, they don't know but, he is watching them from afar while his guilt doesn't let him move forward from his sins. He almost forgets that he doesn't have his Feathemen mask. Would Futaba share with him if she knew what had he done?

It doesn't matter, either way, he doesn't plan to meet her. Preferably, ever.

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matchablossomwrites · 3 years ago

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Hi, I really like your writing!! Can I request Mikey and Izana (u can add more if u want to) react to them hitting their s/o during an argument and how would they apologize ? Angst with comfort, also gn!reader pls (im craving for angst and fluff rn :DD) U don’t need to if u don’t want to write it ofc :)) I respect ure decision ^^ thanks for ure time ❤️

Hey hey hey! Thank you so much for this request! I had a ton of fun writing it ^^ I hope it's up to par with your expectations. I'm so sorry it took this long. I've had an incredibly busy week with my new job and college, but I did my best! I hope you have a wonderful day/night.

Sano 'Mikey' Manjiro

"y/n I don't want to see you right now. Just leave before you regret staying here any longer" he warned "Leave" The air grew more and more icy with each word that came out of his mouth.

You just wanted to check up on him. He'd been so distant lately and this is how he thanks you? You were so worried. Anger boiled up inside of you as you stared at the man in front of you.

His expression was blank. He was going to snap soon. patience was wearing thin for both parties. He didn't exactly have a good day. Things went terribly wrong today and Baji Keisuke had died a few months prior and he was cycling through the stages of grief. The last thing he needed was for you to show up out of the blue like this and confront him now

But it's not like you knew this. You knew Baji had died and you were still easing through grief yourself. God you missed him, but you were coming to terms with the fact that there was no way to turn back time and save him. Mikey was still coping with this. They were best friends. of course this was something that would affect him way more than it would affect you.

"Huh? Are you really telling me this? Mikey I've been so worried about you and this is the thanks I get? I came here to check up on you and even took the day off to spend it with you. I could've been spending my time in so many other ways but I came to check up on you because I care about you!" you yelled you were angry to the point of yelling. Things were getting more and more tense.

Anger boiled inside of him. it was becoming unbearable. "And guess what? I don't care. I don't care that you took all this time off for me. Absolutely no one asked you to be a tragic hero and try to fix me. I don't need fixing. So, I'll say this one more time because apparently you don't know how to take a hint. Go. away." he hissed as his smile turned into a frown.

"Baji wouldn't have wanted you to push us away, you know. He would have-" you began.

However you weren't able to finish your sentence as you felt a stinging sensation on your cheek.

"Shut up! You don't know what he would've wanted! I don't know! You don't fucking know either! Ok?" he hissed as he narrowed his eyes at you. "You don't understand now and you'll never understand! So don't tell me that he wouldn't want me to act like this or whatever! Got it! Because you will never FUCKING know." he growled as he went to point at you.

Suddenly, he was brought back to reality by the sound of you whimpering as you covered your head, attempting to protect yourself. You were too afraid to say anything else to further upset him. You tried so hard not to cry, but with the stinging paired with fear tears cascaded down your face as you attempted to protect yourself from him. "Please don't hurt me.. I'm sorry" you apologized

"Oh god..." he trembled. "oh god, oh god, oh god. what have I done? y/n I'm so sorry." Mikey's eyes widened as he looked at your shaking form in front of him. He attempted to reach out and hold you, however his sudden movement scared you, causing you to flinch.

It was then that he realized the damage he'd done. Guilt hit him like a semi truck. "baby please don't cry. I'm so sorry I let this happen. I never meant to hurt you." he choked out, voice wavering. At that moment all of his emotions that he had been bottling up came pouring out like a waterfall. all the anger, despair, loneliness, and guilt finally made themselves known.

Seeing him break down in front of you made you realize how much he was truly hurting. "P-Please don't go. I'm so sorry." he whimpered. "I never meant for you to see me like that. I'm a monster god I'm so sorry." he apologized. The more you saw him break down the more you realized how bad he truly felt about this.

So, you resigned even though alarm bells were still softly blaring in your head and allowed yourself to be embraced by him. "Don't leave me... please" he whimpered. At this point you both were crying, though neither of you cared that your jackets were getting wet. you weren't sure what to say.

So, you decided not to say anything and let him calm down as you attempted to calm down yourself. Once you both calmed down, Mikey pulled away to look you in the eyes. "Please don't go... I can't lose you too" he begged as he held your face in his hands. He was trembling, absolutely terrified of what he'd done to you. You were his lifeline. He needed you. "I've got you. I promise I'm not going anywhere. I care about you, Mikey, and it hurts to see you like this." you sighed as you gazed at him with a soft expression.

It was then Mikey broke down again. though not for the same reason. It was because he was so grateful he had someone like you by his side. Someone so forgiving and compassionate. "I love you" he whimpered. "Thank you"

"I love you too"

Izana Kurokawa

Things weren't always like this. You were sure of it. But lately your nights were filled with screaming and harsh words. Despite this it was never anything too bad. Either he'd apologize with a bouquet of red tulips, white orchids, and purple hyacinths or a teddy bear and chocolates

But this... this was too far.

You don't really remember how it happened if you were honest. One moment you were having a peaceful conversation. However the moment you brought up Mikey since you'd recently met him at your school.

That's when the mood got sour. He'd said a few things and you retorted with your own set of phrases. Soon the fight grew personal. things were going too far. Both of you were saying things you really didn't mean, but since you both were in the heat of the moment there was no longer a filter stopping you from saying those harsh words and phrases.

Things peaked when he harshly shoved you against the wall in a fit of rage. You were terrified of him, but you didn't dare let him know that. you tried to shove him away but he slapped you. That's when you have had enough. You packed your things, not saying a word to him. Then, when he was asleep you quietly made your escape.

When he woke up however he was shocked and scared. He looked around the shared apartment. there were no signs of you anywhere. His chest rose and fell rapidly as he tried to figure out his next steps, but his thoughts were preventing him from doing so.

Has he finally done it? Had he finally driven you away to the point of never wanting to see him again? He understood if you did. He knows that what he did wasn't right, but he still wanted to make one final attempt at reconciliation and if it failed, all he could do was accept that.

But where have you gone? He had no absolute clue, however he knew you were good friends with Kakucho, so he dialed up his best friend, praying to whatever cruel god was out there that you were at least still alive and safe.

After a few rings Kakucho picked up. In a panicked state he began explaining what he had done, though Kakucho stopped him. "they don't want to see you right now. Leave them alone." he replied, clearly feeling bad for the other party. "Are they with you?" he asked. "No" he replied. "Are you lying to me?" Izana asked. "no." he sighed. "Where do you think they would go if they had no where else to go, Izana?" Kakucho asked.

Their parents. The answer was glaringly obvious but he was so panicked it didn't even cross his mind. "But, Izana now is not the time. Please. Give it a few days. Imagine how they feel." Kakucho replied. "fine..." he sighed.

The next few days Izana spent thinking of what to say and how to apologize. The more he thought over that night, the more he realized he fucked up. As he sat at a table at a cafe that had been your first date with him, he saw you crossing the road, talking with Kokonoi and Inui who also happened to be your friends.

However the more he looked the more he realized that even though you were smiling it wasn't reaching your eyes. It then dawned how much he had truly hurt you. He then raced towards you, not caring if others were watching.

He didn't give a fuck about how crazy he looked in that moment as he sprinted towards you because he knew that if he prolonged this any longer it would only hurt you even more. "y/N!" he yelled, causing you to jolt, effectively capturing your attention as well as Inui and Kokonoi's as well.

"The hell do you want?" Kokonoi hissed as he protectively put his arm in front of you. "Can't you see they don't want to see you! You slapped them and hurt them and you have the AUDACITY to come out here and follow us!?" "Koko... it's ok. Thank you for caring about my safety" you smiled softly at the taller man while Inui glared at Izana. "Fuck this up and I promise you, you won't be allowed to be even within a continent of them" Inui growled before they walked away, allowing the two fo you your privacy.

The two of you then decided to talk it over at the cafe he'd been sitting at. As the two of you sat down, it was then you finally got a good look at him. There were bags under his eyes, his hair was disheveled, and he was distraught.

"y/n I'm so sorry. You deserve so much better... It wasn't your fault to begin with. This whole mess was my fault and... and it wasn't your fault. It was never your fault. I was out of line. God you must hate me... you can't even look at me in the eyes." he mumbled as he let out a sad chuckle.

He felt his chances growing smaller and smaller with each passing minute. He was sure this was the end. The more he thought about it, the more he should've seen this coming. He was so harsh to you, spewing insult after insult at you, yet you always came back to him every time.

The silence was suffocating him. 'Just end it already' he thought to himself as he gazed up at you. 'I can't take it anymore. It hurts.' "Izana '' You spoke up finally, causing him to jolt as he slowly looked up at you. "I think I finally understand you… you’re scared.” you looked down at your lap. Just where were you going with this? He didn’t know. “You’re scared of being happy because the last time you were happy everything came crashing down like a castle of sand… That’s gotta be the reason you keep hurting me right? That’s what I keep telling myself anyway. But every single time this happens the harder it is for me to trust you. To trust that you even care about me anymore. You always tell me you love me, Izana, but I don’t know if I believe it anymore” you sighed as you began tearing up.

The more you spoke the more he realized how badly he fucked up. “I thought this was real, was this real? Or were you just using me just like everyone else? Were you using me to get happy? It’s getting difficult and I’m not sure how long I can keep doing this… especially after you won’t even allow me to meet new people” you muttered. “y/n… I’m so sorry” he sighed, running his hand through his hair. “I never realized you felt this way… god you should’ve told me” “You never cared enough to ask” you muttered.

Izana then got up from his seat across from you before he took you in his arms. He knew the damage he’d done was irreparable, but at least he could try to make it up to you in other ways. “I’m so sorry I made you think I never loved you. God I never meant for that to happen. You’re my home, y/n. I should’ve been more open… I shouldn’t have let my fears take over, I’m sorry. And I know ‘sorry’ isn’t what you want to hear from me right now, but I promise I still love you and I promise I’ll never let this happen again” he choked as he shook his head, truly feeling bad for what he’d done to you. “Izana… please can’t we just go back to how things were when we first fell in love?” you whispered. “I’m sorry… I don’t think that’s possible, but I promise I’ll give you the best possible future.. Just don’t leave. Please” he begged, his voice growing softer towards the end of his sentence.

“Ok… Just know that I’m going to make sure you keep your promise” you smiled, the same smile he’d fallen for when he was child. “I will. Thank you” he smiled.

“You idiot… you broke our promise” you sobbed as you knelt at his grave, holding a bouquet of red tulips and stargazer lilies close to your chest.

A/n: Thank you for your support

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27emailsicantsend · 2 years ago

Text

Chapter Seven: Oh? Oh.

March

And I've still got the Converse that I wore the day we met. I'm running out of reasons not to do it all again. So, if I showed up at your doorstep, would you turn me away? Or would you care to see a stranger whose eyes are still the same? Take me or leave me I'm going home, but I'd rather be going your way, so would you love me now? Take me back to when we were young again, darling. Would you love me now? After everything would you let me in and love me now?

-”would you love me now?”, Joshua Bassett

The weather in Salt Lake pushed dreary days into March. The snow was piled high, but full of dirt and dead leaves. The air still felt cold and unwilling. Ricky was desperate for a bit of sunshine, because he wanted nothing more than to be outside on his skateboard to think. The skatepark ended up being a lot less helpful than he wished; relentlessly reminding him of the time he saw Gina there. The time she first believed in him. It was like the ghost of her faded in and out on the steps every time he tried to make another glide down the ramp. As much as he wanted to shake the thought of her for even a second, he felt powerless to her.

It had been two weeks since Ricky and Gina did their full run through of “Rewrite the Stars”, but this was another memory that took precedence in his head. He couldn’t stop thinking about Jenn clapping softly at the end, saying their performance was "beautifully tragic”, and then Gina running off the stage after. Over and over again, the ghost of Gina was everywhere Ricky went. The coffee shop, the skatepark, his house, the school, the theater- he couldn’t erase the part of his life that made him better, even when she tried to run.

Surprisingly, Gina’s “disappearing act” wasn’t very convincing. She used to be really good at making herself sparse when she was upset, but Ricky began to notice her around more and more in March. She still refused to talk to him, but she wasn’t avoiding the groups he would hang out in either.

Ricky couldn’t blame Gina for that, though. His friends were her friends and she had every right to them as he did. It took their friends a little while to catch on that things weren’t well between the two of them, but from what Ricky gathered, neither Gina nor him had called it a break up.

Not until today, when Big Red asked Ricky to come over and play video games after school.

Ricky was sitting on Red’s basement chair, sipping on a Root Beer, when Red handed him a controller and asked, “you two are really broken up then, huh?”

Ricky didn’t know why Red’s question had caught him so off guard. If he was in their position, he would probably think the same thing. But there was that line in the sand... the one that he (and possibly, Gina) seemed to be the only ones to notice wasn’t there.

“I don’t know if we are, Red,” Ricky tried correcting him as he clicked some buttons on his controller.

“It’s been nearly a month and you two still don’t talk to each other. Normally, it seems like we can’t tear you guys apart. I’m pretty sure the last time I remember you guys being happy was.... the Sweetheart’s Dance?” Big Red reminded Ricky, before clicking the TV on with a remote. He flopped down in the giant chair next to Ricky.

Impressed with Red’s memory, Ricky asked, “You remember that far back?”

“Ricky, I’m your best friend. I notice”.

Ricky was touched.

“Wow... that means a lot,” Ricky commented, shaking his head. He was secretly glad Jet wasn’t there; Ricky knew he’d be keyed up hearing this conversation.

Red smiled. “A month just seems like a long time to not talk to your girlfriend over something. When Ashlyn and I were dating, our fights didn’t last longer than a week or two”.

“Not even when she was openly flirting with Maddox?”

“That’s just the thing, she was open about it Ricky. She was honest with me that there were feelings there. Maybe she wasn’t at first, but she came around. I was upset at first, sure, but in the end I understood. Not every couple is meant to be together,” Red replied, using his controller to gesture his thoughts.

“I know that. I want more than anything to be with Gina and I’m willing to make it work, in whatever way we need. But if she just doesn’t want to be with me anymore, I wish she would just say that. Honesty- like you’re talking about”. Ricky sighed heavily, reeling on what he had just said. The words felt unnatural and difficult to say. He never, ever pictured having this conversation about Gina. The only thing he could do next was stare blankly at his lap.

“Did she ever actually say that Ricky?” Red queried.

Ricky took a minute to think back on all of their conversations. The ring. The ring that had been haunting him since the performance. Why was she still wearing that? Ricky gave his back to Gina. That still didn’t make sense to him. He couldn’t think of a single time Gina had said she didn’t want to be with him. Ever. Even before they started dating.

I wouldn’t quit on us, if I wasn’t moving away, Gina’s voice echoed in Ricky’s head.

“No,” Ricky said, his thoughts spiraling out of control. Gina became his life force and now he was struggling for air. Every second he was reminded that he couldn’t just talk to her, hold her, was another minute closer to him feeling like he was going to go ballistic. His thoughts were becoming overwhelming; he needed to think about something else for a minute so he could clear his mind.

“Can we just... play some games for a minute? I need to think about something else,” Ricky clicked open the game on the TV.

“Sure, but can I just add one more thing?” Red asked sincerely. One thing Ricky appreciated about Red- he was always willing to speak his mind, but he did so tactfully.

“Go for it,” Ricky gestured with his controller, turning his head toward Red.

“Couples that are meant to stay together, will be together. Fate or whatever you want to call it. It’s why, no matter how hard it was, I was willing to let Ashlyn go. If we’re meant to be together, she’ll come back. If not, I’ll find someone new and better”. Red paused before adding, “that’s all I wanted to say. We can play now”.

Fate. The stars. Serendipity. These words seemed to have a chokehold on Ricky. Why did he have to wait for it to happen? What if fate wanted something else for Ricky? There was no one else he wanted. He wanted Gina. Even when he was dating Nini and Lily, there was this part of him that felt attached by some invisible string to her. It felt like their hearts were tethered by something stronger than the explainable.

Ricky went about his next week still pondering on everything that happened since the day of the “Rewrite the Stars” rehearsal and hanging out with Big Red. Every time he saw Gina, she still had her ring on. She was beginning to watch him more, from inside the classroom to theater rehearsals, he noticed her staring. She even said hi casually a couple of times as she greeted the rest of the group.

But it still wasn’t enough. She was still everywhere Ricky went, even only in his thoughts. He saw her pink converse every time he left the house, he saw her ring in each passing glance, and he even once thought he saw her at the coffee shop. He wondered if she knew she had a doppelgänger.

All of this thinking and reeling and hurting was starting to become too much for Ricky. On one particularly overcast day, toward the end of March, Ricky found himself in his room with his blinds closed. All he wanted to do was empty his head into his music. Ricky grabbed his guitar, music book, and pencil- ready to write. He pushed his sharpened pencil into the paper excitedly, led bits falling at the impact, but stopped immediately because his mind ran blank. It was the first time he hadn’t thought of Gina in weeks, but it was also the first time he hadn’t thought of anything. The one time he felt inspired to do something with all of his feelings- about Gina, graduation, his dad and Jenn- he came up empty.

Angry, he tossed his notebook (his pencil came with it too) at the wall. He placed his guitar down and set his head in his hands, too sad to be angry and too angry to be sad. Ricky gritted his teeth, as he began to pace around his room. He needed something. Anything. Anything to let the emotion out. It was consuming and enraging and he was shaking and sweating and-

And that’s when it clicked.

Ricky wanted to scream.

Ricky had thought about it in the past, but had never acted on it. Maybe it was because Zac told him to do it. Maybe it’s because it felt weird. Maybe it’s because it was a song he sang last semester when he was only starting to connect to his character. But this time, this time he felt ready to try.

So Ricky walked over to the window, fully pushing it open. A cold wall hit his face from the breezy air outside. He didn’t care who heard, he didn’t care how cold it was, he didn’t care if he sounded crazy. He wanted it to reverberate off of rooftops, for every bird to stop and listen for a second, for it to break through the clouds. Filling the air in his body from to stomach to chest, he reached his body outside and let out the loudest yell he could think of. Exhilarated and wild, Ricky went to his computer at his desk and started to play the song, “Scream” from High School Musical 3. He sang openly, feeling each morsel of his being connect with the lyrics:

The day the door is closed The echoes fill your soul They won't say which way to go Just trust your heart To find what you're here for

Ricky stood up before opening the door to his bedroom and stepping over the threshold, singing:

Open another door But I'm not sure anymore

It's just so hard

Ricky paused before pulling a cushion off the couch, tearing it to pieces. He threw the contents into the already lit fireplace:

Voices in my head Tell me they know best Got me on the edge They're pushin', pushin', they're pushin'

Ricky stared emptily at a photo of Mike and Jenn on the fire place:

I know they've got a plan But the ball's in my hands This time is man-to-man I'm drivin', fightin', inside of A world that's upside down

He was now in the kitchen, throwing down chairs, slinging hand towels off the oven, throwing forks and knives at the door, breaking the plates and glasses in the cupboard:

It's spinning faster What do I do now Without you? I don't know where to go What's the right team I want my own thing So bad I'm gonna scream

I can't chose, so confused

What's it all mean I want my own dream So bad I'm gonna scream

By this point he was fully invested in the song. Not taking a thought into his destruction. He sang the rest of the song as darted around the house, jumping on the couch, knocking over chairs, knocking a lamp off the side table, pulling clothes out of the hamper and strewing them everywhere as he looked for his orange sweatshirt:

I'm kicking down the walls I gotta make them fall Just break through them all

Ricky balled up his fist and punched a hole in the wall, his hand throbbing from the pain of a power he didn’t know he had:

I'm punchin', crushin', I'm gonna Fight to find myself Me, and no one else Which way, I can't tell I'm searchin', searchin', can't find a way that I should turn I should, to right or left, it-

It's like nothing works Without you I don't know where to go What's the right team I want my own thing So bad I'm gonna scream

Ricky sang as he unraveled every piece of the apartment, not caring about Mike’s reaction. He finally felt free- like all of the pent up energy had a release. Every lyric another confirmation of how he felt on the inside until he reached the end of the song:

I want my own thing I want my own thing I can't chose, so confused What's it all mean I want my own dream So bad I'm gonna scream

Even though Ricky had sang this song several times before, it was like the music had completely enveloped him this time. When it ended, he was surprisingly caught off guard. Ricky shook his head, bringing him back into the present moment. He was sitting back at his desk, in the same position he was at when he first played the song. He peaked his head out the door to see the house in the same condition it had previously been in. The song might have been a daydream, but the rest of his life felt like a nightmare.

It was time he decided what he wanted, once and for all.

Ricky picked up his notebook and pencil from the other side of the room and drew a line down the middle. On one side, he wrote “decided” and on the other he wrote “not decided”. Anything that was still not decided, he would take the time to figure out today. He was done being confused.

On his “not decided” column, he wrote:

-college

-what I’ll do after I graduate

-where I’ll live

When Ricky got to his “decided” column, he was only able to write one thing before his mind came up blank again:

-Gina

However this time, instead of staring blankly at the page and getting frustrated over having no other decisions again, he made a new course of action. He was going to get outside and ride it out, no matter what the weather. He put on his black converse and grabbed his skateboard, bolting for the door.

However as he was running, exhilarated and ready to decide, he nearly sprained his ankle at the foot of the door. It landed awkwardly on an object that had somehow made it’s way onto the welcome mat inside the apartment. Ricky thought it must have gotten kicked over when he or Mike had come inside for the night. His foot landed awkwardly on Gina’s pink converse.

And that’s when the floodgates opened. It was like Ricky had closed them to protect him from getting hurt, by Gina, by his family, by making a choice. He refused to acknowledge what has been there the whole time. Every moment he had with Gina, even before they started dating, avalanched their way into his mind. Slowly and discreetly, before pouring in- unstoppable.

Secret dates in coffee shops.

You’re a yes.

The days dancing and baking in the kitchen.

Serendipity.

Going over to her house every night to read her to sleep. All in due time. The fair. I’m not going anywhere. Me neither... at least not without you.

The promise rings. They’re promise rings. That way we promise to always come back to each other. All of the warm feelings Ricky couldn’t explain. I wouldn’t quit on us if I wasn’t moving away. Adventures in the woods. We’re a team. Real Campers Of Shallow Lake. I don’t do anything right the first time, Ricky. The night of Homecoming. I can’t believe I let Color Wars slip through my fingers.

The thoughts raced and raced and raced. Everything made sense. Every connection, every thought, every piece of the puzzle all started to come together. Ricky looked out the window and saw the sun bursting through the dark clouds.

He made the same break through.

“Oh”.

Ricky being ok if Gina went to New York and only caring about how he would stay in contact with her. Ricky not trying to control or manipulate the situation, even if he felt frustrated. He doesn’t always do things right the first time.

It was all Ricky could say out loud before grabbing Gina’s converse and running out the door. The houses and trees worked together to seamlessly blend in his peripherals as he picked up pace. The air whipped against his body, pushing faster to make it to his end destination quicker. The end destination was a couple neighborhoods over.

Ricky was sprinting when he realized what Gina meant to him. Every crash of his foot to the pavement was another reminder of what they did for each other. For so long he didn’t understand why Gina going to New York didn’t bother him- why he felt ok with long distance. He didn’t understand why being separated from Gina was hard, but he didn’t try to control or manipulate the situation. He didn’t understand why he and Gina worked so well together, being able to finish each others sentences and know what the other person needed without even asking. Until now. This perfect, beautiful metaphor for their relationship:

When Gina tried running from her problems, Ricky steadied her. When Ricky emotions ran wild, Gina steadied him. Gina was change; Ricky was stability.

Like converse to pavement.

Ricky ran and ran, the rain beginning to drip on his face in a light and refreshing way. He could feel the worry wash off him, because for the first time in forever, he finally knew what he wanted. As sure as the invisible string tethering them together, he knew.

His heart thumped harder in his chest as his breath showed in light puffs of air outside. The closer he made it to Gina’s house, the worse the weather became, but Ricky kept pushing through.

Cold beat across his face from the light wind and now heavy rain. He didn’t care. His surroundings were nonexistent now, a black backdrop with the light of her house shining at the end. He was going to get these shoes back to Gina.

He was going to get back to Gina.

Ricky finally reached Gina’s house, the rain dumping down on him in a thousand directions. He didn’t even take a moment to catch his breath- he only slowed down his running- refusing to stop until he accomplished what he came to do. Ricky jogged up to the front door of the familiar two story house and knocked loudly.

Silence.

He wondered if Gina couldn’t hear because of the storm outside. He knocked again even harder this time. Gina needed to know he was there.

More silence.

Ricky gave a sigh. Maybe she wasn’t there. He turned around, cold and defeated. Upset and frustrated, he began to make his way down the cement stairs, opening himself back up to the long walk home.

But then he heard a latch unlock the door.

Ricky spun around to see Gina, confused and bewildered. She was in an oversized shirt and sweatpants. A large headband holding back her hair in a top knot. She shook her head several times as if she couldn’t make sense of Ricky showing up at her door.

“Ricky?! What are you doing?! It’s pouring out!” Gina exclaimed.

“Oh,” Ricky said, panting as he looked Gina over. It was all he could muster out. Her confusion began to turn into... anger? Sadness? Ricky couldn’t tell.

“Oh?” Gina said, some water filling in her eyes. Ricky suspected that she was definitely upset.

“Oh”, Ricky said, more sure this time. “As in, ‘oh, that is why I’ve been feeling this way the whole time. That is why every time I’m with you, I feel this warmth in my entire body. That is why, every time I look at you, I’m reminded of comfort and home. That is why you push me to be better and carry me through my worst’.

“Gina, I’m in love with you,” Ricky confessed.

“Oh,” Gina echoed. Ricky began to wonder if they were going to do this all day.

“Oh?” He said, his sneaky eyebrow raising up again. Maybe his eyebrow was more keen than he gave it credit for.

“Oh. As in, ‘you came back’. I always knew you’d come back,” Gina said, tears now falling down her face. She didn’t need to say anything more.

“It’s why you left the shoes,” Ricky concluded her thought, breathless. He shook the pair of pink converse in front of her, splashes of water flying out.

Ricky couldn’t help it. Watching her cry, feeling as happy and as overwhelmed as he was, realizing it’s why Gina kept on her promise ring too- he began too cry to. Big, happy, beautiful tears. They masked themselves in the rain, but released all of the pain he had been feeling. Everything finally made sense. It was truly “all in due time”.

Ricky threw the wet shoes in Gina’s house and pulled her out into the rain. He began to kiss her passionately, over and over. Gina reached her hand up, pulling her hair now soaking wet hair out of it’s bun. They continued to kiss, releasing all of the tension and build up that had been fogging their lives.

Gina pulled slightly back from the kiss, putting her hands on Ricky’s face, and with tear-soaked eyes said, “I love you too, Ricky Bowen”.

They pulled each other in again, kissing until their lungs gave out.

Ricky finally spoke again- slightly yelling over the loud rain crashing on them and her house, “Gina, everything that I have done this last year was for you. It was always for you. You have dictated every move I have made in the best way. They were always my own choices, but I made them with you as my lighthouse. I never wanted to quit on us either. I’m not going to lose you. Not because you can’t walk away from me or because I don’t want you to go to New York, but because I want to make it work. I want to make us work. Because whether we try to or not, we will work out. We come back to each other every time”.

“Ricky!” She stopped him loudly over the rain, giggling.

“What?” He asked, a confused smile glued to his face.

Gina laughed even harder, her eyes squinting with glee as she said, “You got started”.

The couple were now fully bursting out in laughter, wiping away tears and water off of their own faces. They couldn’t stop laughing, even as Gina pulled Ricky’s face in again to kiss him.

Gina understood what Ricky meant, because he had one thing wrong this whole time: Gina’s love language wasn’t gift giving, it was words of affirmation. The song she wrote, the promises she made, the writing in the rings, and even the way songs affect her- it all made sense to Ricky.

Ricky was supposed to tell her he loved her first. That’s how she would know they were going to make their relationship work after graduation. That’s how she would know that he chose her back. That’s what she was waiting for.

Gina reached into her now soaking wet pocket and pulled out a small silver band. She took Ricky’s hand and slid the ring back on his pinky.

“How long have you been carrying that around?” Ricky shouted over the torrential rain.

“Since you took it off!” Gina yelled back, letting out her last few giggles.

Ricky wrapped his arms around Gina, picking her up and spinning her as they kissed one more time. After he set her down, Gina slid her pinky finger around Ricky’s. Their rings clanked together as she led him into her house.

Once inside, Ricky kicked off his water-soaked converse next to Gina’s... where they belonged.

He was finally home.

****************************************

Epilogue

Over the next month, the weather began to let up. The sun shined more often than not, giving Ricky a lot of time to spend outside with his friends and Gina. They savored their last moments together before the select few of them graduated.

The Greatest Showman wasn’t going to be until May right before graduation, so Ricky spent a lot of time with Gina rehearsing. He even helped write a new song for the show that Jenn took to immediately. All of the time on stage, being “Little Zac”, his passion for writing music, and having previous experience on TV made Ricky realize that he might want to do something involving the arts after he graduates.

Ricky finally told his dad that he was going to move to New York with Gina to pursue his dream of writing music for TV and stage productions. He also chose the option of trying to act in some of the shows that would use his music. He ended up giving Zac a call, telling him he was sure this was what he wanted to do with his career. Zac was so ecstatic to hear from “Little Zac”, that he pulled a few strings to make sure Ricky wouldn’t start off at nothing.

Broadway was creating a new play, The Chronicles of Narnia, in September and needed actors and music producers. Zac told them he knew a guy, Ricky Bowen, who could do both. Zac even said if they were lucky enough, Ricky’s girlfriend, Gina Porter would probably be willing to choreograph for the show too. And despite some hesitation from the producers, Zac was able to convince the producers to hire a couple of soon-to-be graduates to help with the show.

Mike reminded Ricky that he would be fine if Ricky left because now he had Jenn. They were going to get married that summer in July. Ricky would spend the first half of the summer in Salt Lake with Mike and Jenn, and after their wedding spend the second half with Lynn and Todd in Chicago. After that, he would get on a train and meet Gina in New York.

One late Saturday in April, before he and Gina went to rehearsal for The Greatest Showman, Ricky ran to his room to grab his skateboard. He was hoping to ride it that day. He went to pick it up from the side of his bed when he saw a notebook peeking out from the corner. It was opened to the page that had his list of “decided” and “not decided”. Ricky thought that it must have gotten kicked under there without him realizing it.

Ricky walked over to his desk and got out a pencil. Picking up the notebook and sitting on the edge of his bed, he scribbled out the undecided column completely. After that he added one more thing under the “decided” column. It now read:

-Gina

-What I’m doing after I graduate

“Ricky? You almost ready? It’s about time we go!” Gina called to his room.

Ricky grabbed his skateboard as responded, “coming!”

Once he made it to the front door, he slid on his black converse and crouched down to tie the laces on them. Gina giggled as she tapped his leg with her foot.

“Hey, we’re matching,” she noticed, her pink shoe peeking in the corner of his eye.

Ricky finished tying his shoe and stood up, giving Gina a quick kiss on the cheek before saying, “good”.

Gina grabbed her rehearsal bag with her dance shoes in it and held her right hand out, lacing it with Ricky’s. They began to walk to rehearsal, Gina’s dance bag in her open arm and Ricky’s skateboard in his.

Ricky thought about what Gina said before the school year. About how he was never the plan, but plans change. Maybe she was right- his plans changed. Even now, none of his life was part of the plan. Maybe before he met her, he was always going to be in Salt Lake. He was going to be fighting for a girl that didn’t want him back, unhappy with his dad, and alone with no friends but Big Red.

Ricky thought about how much he used to push change away. That new things were scary and they needed to be right the first time. That he would try to fit puzzle pieces where they were never meant to fit. However, Gina came in and changed everything in the best possible way. He never knew what to expect with her, but he willingly followed. He kept up with all of her paces.

Ricky finally realized that regardless of how many changes his life brought, he knew one thing with more certainty than anything else: Gina wasn’t a maybe. Gina was a yes.

#OCAP #Of Converse and Pavement #HSMTMTS #high school musical the musical the series #hsm #high school musical #rina week 2022 #rina #ricky bowen #gina porter #ricky x gina

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colemonroe · 2 years ago

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Snorting a bright laugh, he glanced down at her, head knocking in a brief shake just moments before another one of his sly looks graced his features, “Look, I only aim to please, alright? Might not be able to dance like you, but I can make it work.” Of course he was only teasing, but the fact that he was able to do so this freely with her spoke volumes– he wasn’t this open with everyone, but he’d always felt safe enough to be around Taliah. Eyeing the sky again, he shrugged a shoulder and sighed, “I mean, makes sense– most men have small heads,” he pointed out, though it wasn’t as though he was counting himself in a different category. That’d be for someone else to decide, but still, he wasn’t ignorant to how stupid his species could be. Apparently, astronomers weren’t either.

Humming thoughtfully, he nodded, sure that that spoke for itself. Michael had taken Cole under his wing when he’d been at his most vulnerable, still reeling from his mother’s tragic, unexpected death. Without his guidance, Cole didn’t even want to imagine where he would have ended up. Chuckling then, he shook his head, “Nah, dead serious,” about Bellatrix, “debated not even tellin’ ya, didn’t wanna ruin Orion for ya.” Softening, he glanced down at her, a warm smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, though it was tinged with a touch of sadness. He understood where Taliah was coming from and the look in his eyes said as much. “I dunno, darlin’,” he murmured, head shaking gently, “Maybe he’s got someone like you though.” To anyone else, maybe it would have sounded crazy, the way they spoke about a star, but to Cole, it felt pretty spot on and needed no explanation, not with her.

“Mmhmm– and ‘cause it always brings me back,” he explained, though really, he was keeping it brief. If prompted, he could go on and on about his love for Polaris all night– until he was blue in the face. Though if he was being honest, he could do the same whenever he talked about her. Leaning into her touch as she reached up to cup his cheek, he offered up a warm smile, “Thank ya for lettin’ me,” Cole thought to counter, knowing that there were very few people he could actually do this with– even fewer he’d actually want to.

In a lot of ways, perhaps the kiss should have been surprising, but in other ways, it wasn’t. The two of them had always spoken the same language– where words tended to fail, touch never did. They were so well attuned to one another by now that Cole would never even dream of balking at the kiss, but rather, he leaned into it, letting it say all the things neither one of them really had words for. He didn’t need them anyway. She’d always shown him more than words could possibly say. Cole didn’t want to overthink it. Really and truly, he only wanted to keep kissing her, to get lost in that warm familiarity, that security that only she could give him.

Tipping his head to the side, a sly grin forming on his lips, he picked up on her silent cues, head dropping down right along with her, “Always, huh?” He chuckled, meeting her halfway for another brief kiss, “Kinda like the sound of that,” he murmured, one hand keeping him propped upright while the other washed up her side, traveling over every perfect dip and curve before finally bunching up in her shirt. Was this where they would’ve ended up at the fair, had their time in the photobooth not been cut short? Who knew, really? All Cole cared about was right now and he had a hard time imagining anything he wanted more than this– this safe, secure feeling here with her. A warm smile caught fire at the corner of his mouth and spread like wildfire at her question. “Of course,” he murmured, lips finding hers as if to drive the point home. This would always be okay, whatever this was. But now wasn’t the time for him to debate it– only trust it. Feeling the push of her hands, he sat up, shrugging out of his cut and tossing it aside. Hauling his shirt overhead soon after, he discarded it just as easily and dropped back down to her, running a hand through her hair and beaming a soft, yet crooked grin at her. “Better?” Cole mumbled against her lips, catching her bottom lip between his teeth, “I want ya, T– that alright?”

"Well, I'll keep that in mind. There have been many occasions where watching your naked ass walking around would have brightened my entire day." Taliah giggles, whilst it was a joke, she couldn't say it wasn't also true. As far as the male form goes, she was almost certain Cole had been hand-crafted by god himself. "Maybe he isn't, he could have a really small head?" Grinning, she couldn't help the soft sigh that escapes her. Like she can actually feel the relief in her bones and the happiness settling in her heart. Whether it was the beauty of the night sky, or the love she could feel radiating from the man she was curled up against, she wasn't going to question it. It was about damn time she could take a breath without it feeling like such a struggle.

"When you needed guidance the most," she smiles softly. Cole didn't need her to tell him how Michael always had that way about him, a rare kindness that always dissolved into patience and a will to help his people. It was obvious to anyone who knew him, just as it was obvious how his influence had shaped the man Cole had turned into. "You're joking? ... Slimy bitch gets everywhere," Bellatrix, that was. "That's my point. Everyone looks to Sirius, who does Siruis look to?" Chuckling gently, it's just a show to acknowledge she knows it doesn't make much sense, though she had a feeling he would understand her true meaning - he always did.

"Because it's constant?" She asks, though she doesn't really expect an answer. It was more an out-loud thought, if Polaris never moved, that meant it never strayed - you always knew it would be there when you needed its light. "I guess it did." Stick. Taliah smiles, blindly lifting a hand up to briefly cup his cheek. "Thank you for sharing this with me." She wants him to know that it means a lot. Especially now she knows just how personal it is for him. It wasn't just a place he liked to come and take a breath, but a place laced with history, memories that he cherished.

Taliah could feel the weight of his words sitting in her chest, like they were seeping into all the dark spaces just to show them light. No words she could speak would be strong enough to convey what his meant to her, perhaps it was a big part of her reasoning for deciding to show him with actions instead. Often, when she was overwhelmed, it was actions that she chose to let speak for her and she hoped that just maybe, she could pour enough emotion into her kiss that he would feel how sincere it was. There's a doe-eyed look on her features, only for a moment wondering if she's overstepped. Though, when he tells her not to be sorry, a smile breaks out, cut short only by the way he initiates a second kiss. How easily she fell into step with him in such an intimate way would be pause for thought if she wanted to stop and give it any. Not tonight.

Tonight, she only wanted to bask in the familiarity of it, the feeling of being wrapped up and safe, present with her person. Random kissing had never been a part of their friendship, at least not until the carnival, but could you really consider two times a pattern? What it did show though, was that small shift that was yet to be explained. Something new between them, simmering away in the air that surrounded them. "For you?" A soft giggle escapes her as she lowers her head back down, prompting him to follow her. "Always." As true now as it was that day in the photobooth, only now there wasn't any inpatient crowd outside to ruin the moment. Nothing to stop them besides themselves as she brings her lips back to his. Soft and light, smiling as she does. "Is this okay?" She's teasing, already knowing his answer. Though the question of what this was had yet to be figured out. Her hands push at his jacket, not caring for the way the leather kept her from letting her hands trail along his shoulders.

#( ft; taliah tezel. )#( taliah 006. )

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lonely-lost-soul · 4 years ago

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Of Immortality and Nymphs

(Philza Minecraft x Reader)

Request 2: Just c!philza simping over reader!!

Requested by: Anonymous

(Okay maybe I got a little carried away with this one...)

~~~

He met her for the first time when he was a young man, who barely understood the world around him. Messing with things he shouldn’t was his specialty so when he heard there used to be Nymphs in the nearby forests, he just had to find out if they were extinct or not. Phil flipped through his worn journal and tapped his quill on the paper, he wanted to document his journey to finding the supposedly mythical creature. After all, this was one of his first real adventures all by himself he wouldn’t accept any form of defeat. He popped the cork off the invisibility potion he had and downed it with one swig. Phil, now hidden, wandered into the forest of the last known location, of the last recorded Nymph. Not being visible to the creatures in the forest allowed Phil to take in the beauty of nature around him, he could get close to the animals and see them in their natural habitat. The forest was beautiful, sunlight peeking in through the leaves of the trees, it was magical. He placed his hand on the trees running his hand over the bark with a smile, Phil heard a soft twinkling in his ear, and his head shot up. Always trigger happy he put his hand on his sword, in the middle of a nearby clearing stood a beautiful woman with gorgeous (h/c) hair. Flowers and leaves seemed to be interwoven within the strands, her ears were elf-like in appearance adorned with gold piercings. Her dress flowed in the wind, it was a soft almost translucent green decorated with leaves, in her hand was a baby chick. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, it was clear she was the Nymph that the old stories were talking about, thank god for the invisibility potion.

Pulling out his journal once more he began to sketch a picture of the elegant woman, he didn’t want to forget her face. The man looked up once more to finish up the sketch and the Nymph was gone, he frowned sadly, he did hope he could get to talk to her.

“What’re you drawing?” Phil snapped his notebook shut letting out a startled yelp, he turned to look at the figure beside him. The potion must’ve worn off when he wasn’t looking, however beside him was said Nymph. His jaw almost dropped open, did she have no self-preservation? “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you!” She stepped a few steps back and he held out his arm to stop her.

“No! No, you’re alright!” He put his hand to his heart, “I’m Phil. and you are?”

“(Y/n). Are you human?”

“Tragically,” Phil gave her a little smile as she tilted her head curiously. “Are you a Nymph?” You looked a little hesitant, he watched as your ears twitched in an undeniably cute way. He felt himself melt a little as you gave a nod,

“A Meliae if you want to get specific,” you smiled fondly giving him a teasing wink. Opening his notebook again he scribbled that down next to the figure drawing of you, you sat down in front of him watching in awe, “Is that your language’s written system?” Looking back up at her curious expression Phil once again felt his heartbeat speed up in his chest.

“It is. You’re very clever,” He hummed and was delighted in the way you flushed up to the tips of your ears. You waved him off,

“I’m not that clever. When you’ve been around as long as I have you pick up on certain things,” He watched you carefully as you sat down beside him resting on your knees. Curiously Phil tilted his head,

“How long have you been around?”

“Don’t you know it’s rude to ask a woman her age?” She shot back a grin on her features, oh Phil was in love. Nymphs did tend to have that effect on people, people fall hard and fast for them, but Phil didn’t care.

“My apologies, that was rude of me huh?”

“Very.” She teased with a snicker, “I’ve honestly lost count at this point.”

“You’ve lost track? So you’re immortal then?” Phil’s entire face lit up the excitement prevalent on his features, “Tell me everything.” He pleaded, with a soft laugh you began to share your tale with the man in front of you. Phil was enamored she had lived more lifetimes than he could begin to comprehend, what he wouldn’t do to have that gift. The duo talked long into the evening and well into the next morning, Phil knew he had to head home soon. Not that he had anyone waiting for him back home, but he couldn’t stay with her forever as much as he wanted to. “When can I see you again?” He whispered taking your hands within his own, he couldn’t help but notice how soft they were for someone living in a forest. You hesitantly pressed your finger to his earring,

“They’ll start to glow whenever I’m near. So you can always find me,” You whispered cupping his cheek in your hand, he felt himself lean into it. “I’ll see you soon Phil,” You leaned forward pressing a tender kiss to his lips before disappearing in a flurry of flowers and leaves. Phil let out a shaky breath bringing his fingers to his lips a wild smile appearing across them. He opened his journal one last time adding ‘great kissers’ to his list of things about the Nymph of the forest.

They met many more times after that, and with each meeting, Phil only fell more and more in love with her. He wanted to protect you and keep you safe especially after telling him that Nymphs were hunted for their tears that give immortality but now without the expense of the Nymph. Yet even with his pleading, you wouldn’t leave the forest you called home. You told him maybe one day you could, but you were the only Nymph protecting the forest and you had to stay to protect your home. Ever the gentleman Phil would drop the conversation and steer it into another direction said direction ended with a lot of kissing.

As the years flew by Phil found himself growing older and you remaining the same and as beautiful as ever, he wanted to be immortal with you. He never wanted to lose you, so he made a deal with the God of undying, sacrificing his three lives for one immortal life so he could remain by your side forever. He’d also have to give up part of his humanity, he was bestowed giant black crow-like wings. But he’d do anything so long as he got to be by your side for the rest of eternity. Phil didn’t want to tell you at first, afraid you’d be mad but it was hard to hide giant black wings and the man could never stay far away from you. When he finally saw you again you knew what went down practically immediately. Surprisingly you took it much better than he originally thought, you seemed to flattered beyond belief but also pissed as hell. Desperately you tried to explain to him that immortality wasn’t a gift but a curse, seeing the world change around you while you stay young forever wasn’t as fun as it sounded. The man scoffed, shooting back a comment of his own about how he didn’t want to imagine a world without you by his side. You didn’t deserve to lose someone you loved just because they were mortal and he stood by that.

He watched your face scrunch up, cheeks turning pink at his sentiment. Mostly because you were melting around his words and he knew it too by the smirk evident on his features. Phil locked eyes with you and smiled endearingly,

“I love you.”

“I’m pregnant.”

“Fucking what-” He choked on his spit any argument that started before fizzled out the minute you had told you said those two words to him. He felt his features morphed in surprise before wrapping you in a tight suffocating hug. That only solidified his choices, he made the right decision, he needed to stay by you and your child’s side so long as the universe allowed him to.

However, things weren’t all peaches and rainbows as the world changed to a dark and dismal place once more. Forests were being burned and destroyed and humans once again discovered the existence of Nymphs and wanted to hunt them down for sport. Things were dangerous, way too dangerous for you and the newborn son you shared with Phil. Reluctantly you and Phil came to a decision, to protect your baby you needed to leave, it was the only way to keep them safe. You held the baby close to your chest, tears swelling in your eyes as Phil kissed your cheeks trying to shush you softly. “It’s alright…” His voice was gentle, his big hand caressing the boy’s chocolate brown curls.

“It’s not alright. Phil...I don’t wanna leave you or Wilbur.” Your voice quivered and Phil’s heart shattered in pieces, “But his safety comes first.” You brought the baby up to your lips and kissed his forehead, he giggled sweetly trying to squish his mother’s cheeks. You laughed as he did so, “My sweet, lovely boy. I’ll have to leave you for a while, I don’t want to but you need to be kept safe. I…” Phil frowned watching as you choked up once more, “I’m not safe.” Even through your tears, Phil thought you were beautiful, “You can’t tell him about me…”

“(Y/n) I can’t- That’s just not fair-” You shushed him with a kiss to his lips, passing Wilbur off to him.

“If he’s anything like his father he’ll lose his mind searching for his mother. He needs to live his life.” You reached up holding Phil’s chin on your pointer finger, “He has to live life to its fullest, Nothing can hold him back. It has to stay this way until I can come back. Which I will...hopefully it won’t be too long.” You smiled up at him and Phil took in a shaky breath,

“What if I ruin him.” His voice was painfully tight holding his grip on Wilbur tightening as well, it made the baby squirm. You shushed him softly, pressing a kiss to his lips, his scruff tickling your chin. To him the kisses always felt electric, never devoid of passion and adoration, he leaned forward to chase those addicting lips as you pulled away.

“You won’t ruin him, you’re the most gentle and kind man I’ve ever met. You took care of me all these years, you’ll be amazing for Wilby.” Phil watched as you kissed Wilbur one last time before stepping away with a shaky breath. “Just be as good to him as you are to me,” You both heard the crunch of leaves, it caused you to jump a little looking around the forest frantically.

“Go. We’ll be fine. Just stay safe and come back to us okay?” You could only nod at him before disappearing in a gust of leaves and flowers. Phil felt his heartache and he jolted as Wilbur began to cry seemingly already missing the presence of his mother. “Oh Wilbur hush, hush for me please,” His father pleaded as he began to rock him gently this was going to be a lot harder than he would ever anticipate, but to keep you safe he’d give up the entire world.

~~~

Decades went by, Phil had not only Wilbur to watch over but three more idiotic kids, others adopted of course. Wilbur had grown up into a strapping young man, got married, and had a son, you would be so proud of him. You’d spoil Fundy rotten, he just knew you would, he was sure you’d also spoil Tommy and Tubbo. Not to mention you’d force your motherly affection all over Technoblade and he wouldn’t have a choice but to open up to you.

However, none of them even knew you existed, lies were told about who Wilbur’s mother was when any of them asked and it killed him on the inside to lie about you. Eventually, Wilbur just stopped asking, most likely assuming something bad happened that Phil never wanted to discuss with him. Something far too painful to even tell his son about,

Which was half right he supposed.

It started like any other day, Tommy and Wilbur were messing around with Dream, something about discs and war that Phil didn’t particularly care about. Wilbur had come over once again to plead with Phil for aid in the war, but once again he refused him. This time he even brought Fundy along thinking that seeing his grandson might change the older man’s mind. However, he still refused knowing it wasn’t going to end well in the long run even if Wilbur did win. Sometimes kids had to make their own mistakes to learn about the future. It’s not like he hadn’t told Wil it wouldn’t end well, he did multiple times, but the kid was just as stubborn as he was and wasn’t going to back down.

“Dad, please. If you’d just join in we’d slay Dream and his team, all the fighting will come to an end. The nation I’m trying to create would finally be free and safe. Just help me.” Wilbur pleaded, a small whine slipping into his voice as he followed Phil and his son into the forest, “We can establish our new nation and be free from tyranny. No more war, isn’t that what you keep advocating for?” Wilbur continued to rant, not helping at all with his chores, his voice grew soft suddenly, and Fundy grabbed onto the sleeve of his jacket.

“What is it, kid?”

“Your earring’s glowing pops.” Fundy pointed to his ear and Phil froze in place the wood that he collected falling out of his hands, scattering all over the forest floor.

“Dad?” Wilbur repeated his voice growing louder in concern, Phil looked around the clearing frantically before bolting in a random direction.

“Grandpa!?” Fundy yelled chasing off after him, his tail puffing up anxiously,

“Fundy don’t just run off!”

Phil didn’t stick around to hear them, you were around here somewhere the question was where. His heart was beating erratically in his chest, please, please god let him find you. He didn’t have to wait long, he’d recognize you anywhere you still looked the same. Standing in the middle of a flower field you looked over your shoulder, “(Y/n)! Darling!” He called out choking a little on his words, your (e/c) eyes blew wide and he heard you laugh. You ran up to him flowers growing in your wake, you launched himself at the man and he lifted you in his arms. He spun you around laughing in disbelief, using his wings you both floated in the air, he cradled the back of your head with his hand, “I can’t believe you’re here.” Phil whispered, pulling away to cup your cheeks with your hands, “you’re real.”

“Of course I’m here silly goose. I told you I’d come back didn’t I?” You laughed fondly as he began to pepper your face in kisses, “Even if it is way later than I intended…” You trailed off with a small wince,

“Who cares. You’re here now and you’re safe.” He landed a kiss on your lips as you kissed him back. You tasted just as he remembered like fresh air and oranges, he wanted to swallow you whole. He never wanted to let you go again, and he never would if he had a say in the matter.

“Dad? What the fuck?” Wilbur blurted as Fundy and he came upon the clearing, you pulled away from Phil. Tears filling your eyes, your hands coming up to cover your mouth, Phil rested a hand on the small of your back.

“Wilby…” She whispered, stumbling towards the man reaching out towards him, he raised an eyebrow and flinched away from your touch. You pulled your hand back taking a little breath,

“I’m sorry. How do you know my name?” From behind you, Phil flinched; he knew that’s what you wanted, for him not to remember you. But, fuck he felt guilty about it, he was about to feel even more guilty in a minute.

“She’s your mom Wilbur.”

“Fucking WHAT.” Wilbur sputtered taking a few steps back from the woman, “You told me my mom was a fridge!”

“You told him what.” You turned towards Phil, eyes blazing with annoyance, he held his hands up in surrender. “Why would you tell him his mother was a fridge! I know I told you to lie but a fridge! Phil that’s not even physically possible!” You scolded the man crossing your arms over your chest, his face flushed a bright red. He even missed you yelling and scolding him, he was down bad.

“(Y/n) I panicked-” Phil started to explain and you cut him off with an eye roll. “I’m sorry okay, I love you.”

Meanwhile, Wilbur and Fundy looked in between the two adults rapidly as they talked. Both equally shocked and at a loss for words, Wilbur took a step forward and grabbed your wrist.

“Please continue your explanation,” He commanded softly, “If you are my mom why did you leave? Why haven’t you been here?” Wilbur frowned as he watched you look away from him,

“How much do you know about Nymphs Wilbur?” Wilbur turned bright red and the color reached up onto the tips of his ears, “What?”

“My mom’s a Nymph.” Fundy spoke up in place of Wilbur, “her name’s Sally. I...I’m Wilbur’s son.” He watched your face melt and mouth a broken ‘son?’, Phil noticed and walked up to squeeze your hand. You had missed so much, you hoped you didn’t blame yourself, you and Phil lived too long to live with that many regrets.

“What happened to her?” You asked tenderly,

“Killed.” Wilbur said bluntly, “by hunters. Don’t worry, I made sure to dispose of them.”

“I-I’m so sorry.” You spoke and Wilbur couldn’t help but feel compelled into your arms. Something about you just made him want to melt into your body, he knew Phil was right in the end. You were his mother through and through, I mean the shared pointed ears said enough.

“Is that why you left?” Fundy asked walking over to stand beside Wilbur, Fundy’s ears pressing against his head. They both watched you nod and Phil tightened his grip on your arm, you took in another deep breath. His hand moved to wrap securely around your waist, he was here for you. He’d always be here for you.

“When you were born, the hunters were far worse, there were much more of them. Greater numbers and they sniffed out Nymphs like hunting dogs to a rabbit. I couldn’t keep a newborn baby safe, especially one that was half Nymph...Which probably explains why Fundy’s part fox, he has more Nymph in him.” The fox hybrid seemed to light up at even the inclination that he was special in any way, shape, or form. “It was safer for me to be as far away from the both of you as possible, and I was right considering you grew up into a handsome young man with a family of his own.” You chuckled fondly leaning into Phil’s touch. “But I can understand if you don’t trust me or want to get to know me,” You smiled sadly at the man Fundy spoke up before Wilbur could.

“No! We want to get to know you grandma!” He blurted taking your hands in his own, you melted at the adorable way his eyes lit up. You glanced up at Wilbur who Phil totally wasn’t threatening with his eyes,

“I…” The man looked hesitant, but as he stared into your warm eyes once more he felt encapsulated within them. His longing for a motherly figure in his lips came back at full force and washed over him like a tidal wave. He had a mother and she was safe and here and willing to come back into his life if he was ready.

Was he ready? Why did he feel ready?

“Fuck that hesitance she’s grandma,” You let out a delighted laugh ruffling up Fundy’s hair, his tail wagging elatedly behind him.

“Don’t spoil him, love.”

“Fuck you, I’m spoiling the hell out of my grandson. Gotta make it up to him somehow.” Fundy’s tail only wagged harder as he wrapped you in a tight hug, you hugged him back just as tightly.

“Hey, Hey move over champion. I get to hug my mom now.” Wilbur snapped defensively, as Fundy snickered only looking up at him mischievously hugging you tighter. You laughed in delight seeing Wilbur huff, Phil melted against you in relief. Wilbur’s face was scrunching up the exact way you do when you’re pissed, he smiled against the side of your head. Wilbur pushed his son to the side gently and wrapped his arms around you in a hug, he towered over you but couldn’t help but bury his face in your neck. You cooed softly and ran your fingers through his hair, he was gone the moment you did so, melting in your arms completely.

Without you noticing Phil took a step away from the group just to admire the moment from an outsider’s perspective. For what felt like the hundredth time that hour Phil felt light, he felt like the weight of the world was off his shoulders. Everything was right in the universe again, you were finally holding your not-so-little boy in your arms again after all these years. Even if you did have a fox hanging off you as well, Phil let out a soft chuckle looking at the three with adoration. A long time ago he gave up his mortality and humanity for you, after you left he had pleaded to the gods once more, he swore he would give up anything for just one more day with you by his side. They had ignored his wishes, they knew without a doubt you’d be back in his arms again, and this time he wouldn’t have to give up a single thing.

~~~

Okay but actually I had so much fun writing this??? Maybe even a Pt. II?

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bestworstcase · 2 years ago

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Salem who knows humankind is strong when they band together due to her experience of gathering an army to fight literal gods vs Ozpin who was put in a position that already came with a secret he felt he couldn’t share who has seen strong groups fall to doubt and fear which is huh… what made him and Salem break up bc their doubted and feared what the other was hiding from them. Which came after Salem convinced him to become gods to the humans bc their powers combined convinced them they could do so.

I Love Tragedy and Complicated Relationships and How Ozpin and Salem are both their own jailers and biggest asset. It’s wild

tbh i don't think the conviction with which salem believes in human potential because of the experience of rallying armies against the gods--like, she's always had this fundamental inkling of optimism, it would never have occurred to her to lead a rebellion if she didn't believe in the possibility of victory, but i think the experience that really crystallized this part of her worldview was living long enough to see that the gods failed. they crushed her rebellion in the blink of an eye by obliterating every person on the planet, dismissed humankind as a disappointing experiment that had now ended by their hand, and then left her to rot.

and then humanity came back.

that was not supposed to happen. that should not have happened, not when the gods so thoroughly and brutally dismantled their little exercise in sharing their toys. that humanity crawled out of the mass grave the gods condemned it to is the ultimate defiance of the gods and ultimate proof that humans really CAN liberate themselves from the tyranny of their creators.

( there's a part of me that always side-eyes what salem says to ozma after they reunite. "we could be the gods of this world. our powers surpass all others; our souls transcend death." like. the natural assumption here is that by we salem means herself and ozma, but... salem was there when the gods slaughtered humanity, and then she watched humanity rise again all by themselves. she once rallied armies to "claim the powers of [the gods] for themselves and [...] perfect their own design"—and i really think as far as salem is concerned, she lost the battle that day, but the gods lost the war. it's all muddied by her earnest desire to support ozma's vague ambition of "bringing people together" and the unanswered question of exactly how much salem was willing to compromise in order to give him what she thought he wanted, but particularly given the repetition of "the hearts of men are easily swayed" i DO wonder if salem was really suggesting what ozma understood her to be suggesting or if, instead, she had in mind more of a "rebellion against the gods...2!" in mind on the grounds that humanity ultimately won the first round. )

( by the same token i also wonder how much ozma might have picked up on that subtext, because his reaction to what she's saying is puzzled with, at worst, a tinge of skepticism until the very, very end, when salem proposes with such casual confidence that they could make the world BETTER than it was when the brothers ruled over humankind. the like... layer of theological disagreement, apostate vs disciple, in the tragic unraveling of their marriage is endlessly fascinating imo. )

another thing i think about A NORMAL AMOUNT in this regard is that, while jinn says that salem and ozma "each withheld parts of their story" after their reunion, a statement that implies approximate equivalence in dishonesty on both their parts—salem "blamed the end of the world on the gods," which is, um, accurate, whereas ozma "kept his task and the relics a secret," which by necessity means that he told her nothing. and of course, this bit of narration plays over a silent scene that depicts salem talking—soaked in an inexplicable wash of red light—before panning over to ozma who says... nothing.

my read on lost fable generally is that jinn is answering very precisely the question ruby asked her, which is "what is ozma hiding from us?", and consequently ozpin's own biases, misconceptions, incomplete understandings, and genuine doubts about the veracity of what salem told him back then are left intact and conveyed through the narrative structure of a fairytale—exactly the way ozpin would have told this story himself.

but at the same time jinn is the avatar of knowledge (and her personal disdain for ozma, and the enjoyment she takes in exposing him as a liar, are both quite clear) so... i think the incongruences between the spoken narrative and the flashback narrative arise from jinn's own desire to paint a more complete version of the truth than merely ozpin's side of it; she tells salem's story with the same edge of condemnation that creeps into ozpin's commentary on the girl in the tower, but she shows her audience the genuine anguish, desperation, and fear salem felt, shows them the cruelty and indifference of the gods, shows them salem grieving and distraught as the gods leave and shards of the broken moon hammer down... and then, when factually recounting ozpin's side of the story requires her to make this misleading implication that salem lied to him too, she literally DISTORTS the accompanying flashback by abruptly suffusing it with red light. it's like. a literal red flag that the verbal narrative does not add up. that it's nonsensical to imply that salem telling ozma that the gods destroyed the world is the same, a deception on the same level as ozma not telling her that the god of light had promised to return one day to exterminate humanity again.

( either that or the sudden sinister red lighting is jinn's way of representing ozpin's intense desperation to believe that salem lied to him back then, because if she told him the truth then it's his fault, isn't it? if he's the only one who lied. if she really meant the things she said, if she wasn't just maliciously stringing him along to fulfill her own violent designs the entire time, if the things she did were based on genuine trust and support of him, because she believed him when he said he wanted to bring people together under their banner—like. he feels so much self-loathing and guilt as it is. it's fucking boiling him alive and the only way he is coping even slightly is by frantically reassuring himself that salem lied to him and manipulated him too, that he fell for an elaborate deception, that maybe there was something rotten in her all along, even from the very beginning, even in the tower—anything, ANYTHING to make it her fault. it's less painful to convince himself he was a gullible fool back then than to torture himself by wondering if things might have turned out differently if he'd just trusted her with the truth from the start. i think deep down there's a part of ozma that is terrified he's the one who ruined them both, and he's trying so hard to smother that fear by convincing himself that salem was always a monster and his only mistake lay in failing to see it, but he... can't. )

anyway lost fable fucks me up good

also on the subject of blame im obsessed. OBSESSED with ozpin in v5 gravely and honestly saying "it's all my fault"—bc he really truly believes that—before sharing a distorted sliver of the truth that at once takes the blame for things that are unequivocally not his fault AND YET ALSO obfuscates and ignores the actual things he did wrong, the lying the lack of trust the manipulating salem into serving the abusive tyrannical gods she openly despised. half truths and lies blown wide open in the first act of the next volume. im obsessed with this bc—stares at salem's "it's all my fault" moment in v8, at the unspoken tension between the transparent manipulation and the pointedly intentional choice to not do to cinder what the gods did to her all occurring in the context of the dramatically shifting dynamic of her relationship with cinder who much like the kids were with ozpin in v5 is chafing hard against salem's control and outright demanding answers and compromises and essentially equal standing from someone who had hitherto been an unquestioned authority in her life and WHAT IM GETTING AT HERE IS. v6 took ozpin's manipulative "it's all my fault" and turned it inside out and drastically shifted the entire paradigm and in V9 IT'S GONNA BE SALEM'S TURN

#lost fable...2!

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aerltarg · 3 years ago

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Maybe this is a stupid question, buuuuut:

I just can't imagine a world that Rhaegar comes back from the Trident, wins the war and becomes king. No, I'm not a anti Rhaegar, matter of fact I like him very much, I'm just can imagine how would Lya, little Jon, this whole affair, would settle in the capital. The norm that fics (at least those I read) tend to follow is to make Rhaegar:

1. A douche, paranoid and destiny-obessed king.

2. Completely incompetent, aloof monarch, that deep down has a heart of gold, but can't really be understood.

I mean, isn't he supposed to be a scholar since he was a kid? What's are your thoughts about it?

oh, yeah, i can totally understand this! it's is the whole point in canon actually, "the wrong man came back from the trident". you would expect a hero win against his antagonist and have a happy ending w his lady love but it doesn't happen. instead the subversion happens to them with rhaegar being killed by robert who becomes obviously a shitty king and lyanna dying after him. they were never supposed to have happy ending, they were created as tragic and doomed and dead from the beginning for the whole plot to start, jon to have his parentage mystery and dany to take the passed baton as the last dragon, prophesied savoir and the heir who has to carry entire house on her back now.

as for the realistic rhaegar wins aus that's the difficult question. tbh we just don't know enough abt their situation, plans and wishes. you see, e.g. in agot we can be right in ned's head and see his motivations, what he was thinking abt, what he was planning, what he was hoping to do. but if his story was told the way rhaegar's was i bet he would have his own crowd of haters and ~intellectuals~ jumping out every two seconds w their "hot takes" how actually all hints abt what rlly happened (ned being a good man w his own sense of honour, justice and experiences affecting him and the deal w cersei's children) doesn't matter and he was an ambitious prick, planned to grasp the power by being joffrey's regent and make his daughter sansa queen. (you can actually insert there any bullshit and still don't reach the level of stupidity of such "hot takes" this fandom loves so much lmao). also he would be blamed to the hell and beyond for being too stupid and not foreseeing the future and actions of other ppl bc ofc after everything happened it's so easy to say what was so obvious to notice. also they would say that the deaths of his men and horrible fates of his kids are 100% his fault and even straight up say he killed them lmao. i can rant abt it for hours so yeah. this is a situation w too many unknown variables bc it depends too much on actions of too many characters we don't know enough abt. the only thing it's possible to tell for sure is the fact that there couldn't be any perfect solutions since things got too complicated at this point.

such fics as you've mentioned tho are just a part of this dumb fanon where rhaegar is "too prophecy obsessed"/"incapable of love"/shrodinger's rhaegar both smart and stupid at the same time/whatever/all of this combined lmfao. the man was notably intelligent from the early age as you've absolutely rightly mentioned, his guesses abt himself being tptwp have nothing to do w egocentrism as some parts of the fandom would want us all to believe unless he wouldn't be so reasonable abt it and later on, after so many years, wouldn't have changed his mind and thought his son could be tptwp.

and literally fuck all antis that think you shouldn't consider prophecies that hold real power in this fantasy world lol. you know, aegon the conqueror was said to be motivated (or at least partly) to unify westeros by the prophecy and still got the treatment of perfect/maximum close to perfect figure of a leader everyone should look up to from the narrative and grrm. prophecy obsessed much, huh? i don't even talk abt all these parallels between him and rhaegar grrm put there not for bitches to ignore them completely! and i will never get tired of reminding that dismissing prophecies is UNWISE for targaryens of all people. the house whose story is built on the dream of young daenys and her father aenar that listened to her despite common sense (or what local "anti magic"/"anti prophecies" clowns consider to be common sense). targs would be as dead as the rest of dragonlords if not for daenys the dreamer. who else in the world has as many reasons to take prophecies seriously as them?

yet antis out there act as if rhaegar is one dimensional weirdo whose every character trait is abt mf ~prophecy obsession~. like how can they miss one of the main points so badly?? the game of thrones distracts ppl from the real danger beyond the wall, yk, the one rhaegar was aware of and meant to deal with. there wouldn't be such a problem if he became king and had as many years of head start before ice zombies apocalypse as ignorant bobby b did. rhaegar had to die just for westeros to sink in shit and our main heroes to save everyone to make this story more epic LMAO

so yeah, too many ppl portray rhaegar as this one dimensional robotic creature without any knowledge of what feelings are idk even for what reason. it seems these ppl can't read for real bc rhaegar was not only intelligent af as well as dutiful ("it seems i must be a warrior" but "he loved his harp more than his lance") but also. ugh emotional?? my boy had constant emo sessions w brooding at ruins of summerhall, sleeping out there beneath the stars all alone and writing songs that made all women cry. does it sound as someone who "isn't capable of love" lol? folks act as if he was completely heartless from the day he was born (bc he didnt play w other kids ig??) but in reality their emotional range is less than the one of a spoon in comparison to rhaegar's lol. i'm not even gonna address the horrible attitude of demonizing him for his implied depression, vile clowns never listen to themselves when they talk abt targaryens and their "madness".

tldr; these fics are mostly lame af and suck at characterization if they're making rhaegar like that lol. anyway his character isn't abt being a good or a bad king, it's abt being a would-be-king for characters in books and readers in reality to sigh over his tragic aura and pretty aesthetic abt how it could've been. however, grrm clearly doesn't write rhaegar as evil or incapable as some parts of the fandom would want to try to persuade others. realistically speaking in the scenario where he wins there couldn't be any perfect decisions but it's a territory of speculations on thin air and lit nothing more since canon doesn't provide us with enough information to rlly theorize anything instead of building biased headcanons some ppl call "analysis".

but remember what barristan said about rhaegar while practically watching him all his life, from a literal baby to the man grown:

“I know little of Rhaegar. Only the tales Viserys told, and he was a little boy when our brother died. What was he truly like?”

The old man considered a moment. “Able. That above all. Determined, deliberate, dutiful, single-minded.” (ASOS, Daenerys I)

“Prince Rhaegar’s prowess was unquestioned, but he seldom entered the lists. He never loved the song of swords the way that Robert did, or Jaime Lannister. It was something he had to do, a task the world had set him. He did it well, for he did everything well. That was his nature. But he took no joy in it. Men said that he loved his harp much better than his lance.” (ASOS, Daenerys IV)

#thank you for the ask!!!#hope it didnt get too long and rambly afshsjsjs #once started talking its hard to shut up 😂#and im sorry for any possible mistakes #.txt #rhaegar targaryen #targnation #mypost #fandom wank #anti antis #majorton #*answered #asks

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softhxtch · 4 years ago

Text

TITTLE: Just Be Here

SUMMARY: Reader just finished a case and her husband, Aaron Hotchner is always there to support her.

PAIRING: female! reader x Aaron Hotchner

CHARACTERS: reader, Aaron Hotchner, Emily Prentiss and David Rossi (literally for a second), Allison (OC)

WARNINGS: child assault and abuse; mentions of misscariage, alcohol usage, body fluids (blood, urine, vomit), pornography.

WORD COUNT: 3,5K

A/N: am i back? i don’t know hahah, but it’s something, right? again in this story Jack doesn’t really exist, sorry. and again CAC - Crimes Against Children.

'Hey, sweetie. You're safe, okay? Nobody's gonna hurt you anymore.', you whispered taking little girl into your arms. She was sobbing quietly with tears falling down her pink cheeks. She was no more than three years old, still in her purple pajamas, that were dirty form all the body fluids person can imagine and also dirty room she was held in. 'You're safe, Allison. You're safe.', you kept repeating and little girl just held her hands around you even tighter.

You looked around the room and the whole sight was just horrible. No windows, barely any lights, cages, blood and urine all over the floor. Just an awful place to be in let alone to live for months. Even the smallest thought of what was going on before the whole team came in gave you shivers and blood started to boil inside you. The place was there for years at that point and no one knew about it. You were just looking at your teammates, taking the rest of the kids out of the building. Some were crying, some were screaming and some were just clinging to the agents hoping that they would never comeback. And they never will. You would make sure of that.

' Allison, we have to go.', you said quietly, trying not to scare her. But little girl just shook her head and tightened her arms around your neck. 'We have to go. You need to see a doctor. It's scary, I know, but I'm gonna be with you all the time, okay?'

It wasn't easy to convince Allison to come out of the building, but after some negotiations and conversations with you she agreed. You're holding her in your arms as close as possible, trying to avoid the blue and red lights that were blinding both of you in the dark night.

Hospitals were always the last place that you're wanted to be. If you were the it only meant that either someone from your team or family was injured or one of the victims from your case were in tragic condition.

To put it straight, hospitals were never a good sign.

But you couldn't go home, not just yet. You promised Allison, that you would be with her this whole time, so you were also there when she got a check up from the pediatrician. You were holding her hand, caressing the back of it from time to time just to reassure her that you're there. Sometimes your would just add how great she was doing and how strong it is.

'Home.', Allison whined as doctor was checking on one of her bruised legs. Few tears fell down her cheeks, which made your hear break. It was horrible to seeing anyone in that position, but especially a child.

'You're doing great, Allison. Just few more minutes, okay?', you said quietly, taking hair out of her forehead.

'I just need to check the other leg and then you can have a long nap, till morning. How does that sound?', doctor asked and written down something on her notepad.

'I think it's great! Do you, Sonnie?', you said with a happy voice, looking at a little girl. She just nodded, still pouting from her cry few seconds ago. 'I'll be right back.', you said when you heard familiar phone ring. Doctor nodded understanding, but Allison held your hand not wanting to let you go. ' Allison, I'll be back in few minutes. I just need to answer that call, okay? You will be able to see me through the glass. I'm not going anywhere and until then you'll stay with Doctor Ashley.', you explained.

She wasn't convinced at all. It took you few more minutes for to actually let go of your hand. You explained everything a least three times. Doctor eyed you few times, but you just tried to ignore her. After years of working with children you knew how long it sometimes takes to convince them. Especially the ones that have been seriously hurt. They just wanted someone to be with them through the whole process and you understood it one hundred percent.

You sent Allison a small smile, saying one more time, that you'll be back in few minutes. After that you left the room and took out phone, dialing number that called you before.

'Hi.', you heard deep, yet soft voice on the other side. You sighed and replied with the same thing. 'Long night?'

'Yeah and I can't even see the end of it.', you answered and heard your husband's laugh. 'It wasn't a joke.', you added, rolling your eyes.

'I know. But it's kind of ironic considering that the sun will be up in less than an hour.', Aaron said. You could hear him moving around the house. Walking from bathroom to bedroom, probably getting ready for work. 'How are the kids?'

'Fine, if you could say it after living in a basement for most of your life and posing for creepy middle aged men.', you answered, feeling the shivers on your arms. The images that you saw literally just came back. And you can expect they will be coming back more often, but this time in your nightmares.

'All alive?', Aaron asked. You could hear him doing something in the kitchen, which made you smile, still looking at Allison. You actually would do everything to be right now with him in that kitchen. Waiting for his famous muffins with bacon and eggs, like he would do whenever both of you had day off.

'Yes, all eight of them.', you nodded. 'You're heading to work now? It's a bit early, even for you.'

'Not yet.', he answered quickly. You could hear another chews from the other side, which actually made your stomach going louder. 'But yesterday I picked up from the post office that coffee table, that you ordered and I thought I would put it together.'

'You're gonna put a coffee table together? At-', you asked surprised, looking at the watch on your phone. '-4:38 in the morning? Are you okay?', you added with a laugh.

'What can I say? I'm just bored without you.', he answered. Right after that you heard a loud noise from the other side and a quiet curse from Aaron.

'You're okay?', you asked, furrowing you brows.

'Yes. I'm looking for the box with all the tools.', he replied. 'I think I'll ask Morgan about them. He'll know what I should use.'

'How about you leave it to me, huh? I'll do it, because we don't want another trip to ER. It'll be third time this year, they'll assume that I'm assaulting you.', you laughed, hearing just quick 'hey!' from your husband.

For the first time in hours you actually felt nice. You didn't had constant fear in your head about the case. You weren't even thinking about it, right now what you were thinking about was Aaron and that stupid coffee table. And he knew about it, that was the reason why he called. After you were in a car with Allison and two policemen, you texted him that the case was over and you're headed to the hospital with victims. Both of you always do it, just to reassure each other that the other person is fine. Aaron on top of that would always call you. He's a very light sleeper, even waking up when you stir in bed sometimes, so every vibrations of his phone wakes him up. No matter what the time is on the clock, he always calls you. He knows how much you love your job and how saving kids was your thing. You loved it, after few years in narcotics unit you know you found your place. But Aaron also knew that you get very into the cases and you involve yourself a lot and if the case goes wrong you blame yourself really hard. Especially being a unit chief, just like him. So he always tried to light the mood even just a little and talk about the day, whatever comes to his mind.

'You're staying in the hospital, right?', it almost wasn't a question. It wasn't anything new to be honest. A lot of the times you would comeback to the hospital with the victims and especially with this case. He knew it wouldn't be different. You were working on it for over a month and it was draining you.

'Don't think I have a choice.', you admitted, looking back at Allison who was also starring at you. The doctor stopped examination and was about to leave. 'One of the girls won't let me go.'

'Just be careful, okay? And take care. Don't forget to eat something.', he reminded, knowing the previous situations.

'I will.', you reassured him. 'I love you.'

'I love you too, sweetheart. Give me a call later in a day.', Aaron said and you agreed.

After you said your goodbyes, you put the phone in the pocket and went back to the room. Allison immediately opened her arms and you laughed coming closer.

'You're back!', she said loudly, which made you laugh even more. Doctor Ashley smiled at both of you and left the room.

'I said I will.', you reminded her, patting her head. You could clearly see the tiredness in her eyes and how hard she was trying not to fall asleep. 'I think it's good time for a sleep.', you proposed, but Jade just shook her head immediately, taking back. ' Allison, you need to sleep.'

'Not sleepy.', she answered quietly, putting knees closer to her chest. 'Don't want to sleep.'

'You've been awake for a long time, Sonnie. You need to rest. I do too. Everyone needs to sleep so they will have energy for the next day.', you explained, but she once again shook her head. 'I'll be there the whole time. Nothing's gonna happen to you. You're safe.'

'Seven minutes?', she asked, trying to stop the yaw. You nodded and observed how she put her head on the pillow, drifting away from the real world.

Aaron Hotchner looked at his watch for the tenth time in the last 8 minutes. He signed and went back to signing papers in front him.

It was a slow day. Most paper work days were slow, but this one was even slower. He just couldn't focus. His thoughts were everywhere but in that office. He was thinking about his wife and what she's about to at that moment, probably still at hospital with the little girl. It was literally breaking his heart when he was thinking about your job and side effects, but also about your personal issues.

Being married for almost six years and together over eight, was something he was very proud of. He loved you with his whole heart and couldn't see anyone but you. The whole team always loved to see when a woman would flirt with Aaron, because it was always so funny to see him nicely declining the actions. Aaron Hotchner was a strong man with a very intimidating vibe, his voice could literally break you into a meltdown and get when a woman would approach him his eyes would always look for you. He just couldn't see his world existing without you.

With that being said he also knows you very well. Whenever something was wrong, he could feel it. Just from the look in your eyes or movement. You almost didn't have to talk to have a conversation. He understood you without any words and so did you.

After long nights when there were only you two together, Aaron knew what you wanted. Be knew all your dreams and wishes. Where you would like to go for vacations or favourite cuisine. Things that he could control. He also knew about your dream job and family wishes. Things he couldn't control and everytime Aaron would think about this, his heart would break into thousand pieces. Because if he could he would give you everything that you wanted and to do that he would sacrifice anything he could.

Quiet sound of a clock, that was announcing noon, got Aaron out of his thoughts. He looked at the clock just to assure himself of the hour and pressed his lips into thin line. Then he just closed the files on the rest, took coat and walked out of the room. Aaron walked to his friend's office and knocked on the door. He opened them after quick 'come in'.

'Dave, I'm gonna be back in an hour.', Aaron said, looking at the older man working on his papers. He looked up with pen still between his fingers.

'Everything's okay?', Dave asked and got quick nod from Aaron. 'Y/N's at the hospital again?'

'Yeah, they finished the case few hours ago so I'm sure she hasn't ate anything since.', he explained. 'I'm just gonna bring her food and come back.'

'No problem. If anything happens, we'll call you.', David said, waving younger man off. Aaron just laughed and closed the door. Then he walked down the stairs, wanting to leave the office.

'Hey, Hotch! Are you going again to get some food?', Emily's voice stopped him from going further. He turned around to face not only her, but three other agents. 'You're going outside, right?'

'Yes, Emily.', he sighed. 'But I'm not going to the place you love to eat from.'

'I figured. But maybe you would want to do us a favor and go there? Since you're already going outside the office.', she explained and Derek started to come closer with JJ right behind him. 'Look, it's raining outside and it's pointless to have two wet agents in the office. We will pay for the gas and also your food, huh?'

'Just text me your order and I'll see what I can do.', Aaron said, rolling his eyes slightly. Then he turned around and started walking towards the elevators, still hearing voices of agents behind him, who were deciding on the order.

Pediatric floor of the hospital was as always busy. Kids running around, parents trying to keep up with them, crying children from everywhere you can imagine and on top of that walls with so many colours, that he thought that someone vomited on them. He had no problem of finding the room where you were. Of course with a help from nurses.

Aaron slowly opened the door from the hospital room. He was expecting for either you or the child to be asleep and he didn't want to wake anybody up. But the sight inside made just his heart to melt.

You were sitting on the couch with Allison sleeping in your arms. Her head was on your chest and arms were really tight around the back. Her moth were slightly open, just like yours. But you also had your head hung back and he was sure he'd hear your complaints about the neck pains for the next week.

Aaron slowly put the package with your favourite food and something tasty for children on the small table near the door. Then he took the blanket from the bed and put it over you and the little girl, knowing how cold you must be from laying down in one place for so long. After that he just put a light kiss on your forehead and with one last look he left the room.

Aaron got to the elevator and took out his phone, checking out one message from Emily.

If you are going to the place near the hospital and there's a girl with short red hair, then say that you would like to order for Agent Prentiss 😘

He furrowed his brows at the message and dialed her right away.

'Did I say something wrong?', she answered after one signal.

'How this girl supposed to know your order?', he asked, looking at the numbers of elevator going down.

'She'll know, trust me. I've been there many time.', Emily laughed and Aaron could practically see her smile through the phone.

'Whatever.', he sighed, hearing the ding from the elevator. 'Oh and Prentiss?', Aaron called and heard quick 'yeah' from the other side. 'Stop sending me emojis. It's highly unprofessional to do it to your boss and it's making me uncomfortable.', he ended, walking out of the hospital.

You could physically feel lighter closing the door to you home. Everything related to work you always tried to leave outside this house and treat this place like an escape. And it was a long few weeks, so you were nothing but happy and relieved that it's over.

The house was quiet and dark. You could only see dim light from the living room and just thinking about it made you smile. You took off your jacked and boots, leaving the bag at the usual place and started walking towards the light. As you saw Aaron sitting on the couch with his eyes closed, you smiled even wider. His feet were on the coffee table and he had a glass of whiskey in his hand.

You leaned on the door frame and with arms crossed on the chest, you observed him.

'I'm awake.', Aaron said with raspy voice. You knew that he was probably sitting here for a while already.

'I know.', you answered and started walking towards the cabinet with alcohols. 'Aaron Hotchner is at home before me. What's happening in this world? Did they closed the FBI building?', you joked while pouring wine into a glass and sitting next to him.

'Very funny.', he answered with a sarcasm. He put arms around your shoulders and kissed your temple.

'I actually am.', you said, taking a sip. 'But I'm glad you're here.'

'Anytime.', he hummed, placing one more kiss on your head.

'Except the time you're working.', you joked and he just rolled his eyes. 'Thank you for the dinner, by the way. Although I would get something to eat myself, you know?'

'Yeah, you would probably eat your first meal of the day right now. I know you, Y/N.', he said, caressing your arm. 'So, how's the girl?'

'Allison?', you asked, reminding yourself of her beautiful smile in your head. Aaron only nodded, taking a sip from his glass, telling you to continue. 'She's gonna be okay, I hope. But she went through a lot.'

'You got close to her.'

'Yeah.', you admitted. 'I know what you think, Aaron. I know that it's not a good thing, I Get close to those kids and then I come home and they're not there. I know how this looks like. But I swear I just want to help them.'

'I know. But also you need to realize, that when they'll go to foster care they won't have someone to look after them every minute they're there. That there's gonna be many more kids their age and the attention you're giving them right now won't be given to them anymore.', he finished, looking down at you.

'Maybe they don't have to go to foster care.', you whispered, hugging your husband closer.

'You want to adopt a child?', Aaron asked slowly getting to the conclusion and realizing something else. 'You wanna adopt Allison.'

'I do.', you admitted. 'But I won't do it.', you added, sitting straight. Aaron just gave you questioning look. 'They found her mother in Portland, she'll come and get her tomorrow. Ignoring the fact that she doesn't have any job, is living in a two bedroom apartment with four other roommates and all the money goes to the alcohol. Yeah, so Allison has a bright future ahead of her.'

'You never know.', he answered. You put head on his chest once again and laid there for few minutes in silence, trying to relax.

'So, you actually put that table together.', you said keeping the eyes in small brown table in front of you, with Aaron's feet on top.

'I thought you'll never notice.', he answered almost sounding hurt.

'Oh, I did. Just wanted to hold the suspension for a little while.', you smiled and kissed him on the lips. 'Derek did it, am I right?', you whispered, narrowing your eyes.

'No.', he answered simply.

'Liar.', you whispered again, kissing him one more time, but stopping after you hear his phone going off. 'Everything's okay?', you asked.

'Yeah, just Emily.' he answered, but started explaining seing your confused face. 'I gave Emily's number to one of the girls that she has crush on from the restaurant. And I guess she had a good evening.', he ended and showed you the text.

SSA aaron 'Hotch' Hotchner, you are truly THE man 🥰🤭💗🍑

#Criminal Minds #criminal minds fan fiction #criminal minds scenario #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #aaron hotchner fan fiction #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner scenario #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #david rossi #derek morgan #derek morgan imagine #derek morgan x reader

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smolbeandrabbles · 4 years ago

Text

Grace, Too - Director Orson Krennic x Reader (Rogue One)

🎉🎉 !!Fic Number 200!! 🎉🎉

Hollllly crap we made it. We MADE it. And as he was fic number 100, 200 had to be Krennic. HAD to be.

@wltz-bby @mandy23b @happyskywhale @missunsympathetic

Author’s Note: Good god. Oh... This SONG has a lot to answer for.

So, I was introduced to these ‘Courtly Love’ ideas, and I thought they sounded like a lot of fun, so I have a few requests based around these based on conversations. This was the first one I attempted and uh, yeah we ended up with this glorious wordcount.

Also, for my dear requestor and also dear friend @sagitariusrising Happy (Belated) Birthday! 😘💜💙 I hope this fic is everything you wanted!

Grace, Too - The Tragically Hip

Disclaimer: Premise/Idea not mine - although I did make some executive decision changes that I hope you still like / Rogue One characters not mine / some small Catalyst references.

Prompt: “A true lover is constantly and without intermission possessed by the thought of his beloved”

Premise: Orson Krennic has himself an obsession. You remind him too much of someone he once knew. Orson Krennic is dangerous. This much you know, but you are not about to heed your own warnings....

Words: 17,100

Warnings: Swearing / Possessiveness/Obsession/Yearning / Smut - like Sinday/Sunday smut.

_____

He said, I'm fabulously rich C'mon, just let's go She kinda bit her lip Geez, I don't know I come from downtown Born ready for you Armed with will and determination And grace, too The secret rules of engagement Are hard to endorse When the appearance of conflict Meets the appearance of force But I can guarantee There'll be no knock on the door I'm total pro here That's what I'm here for I come from downtown Born ready for you Armed with skill and its frustration And grace, too

---

He had to admit Eadu was not his favourite planet in the galaxy. Susceptible to many a storm, Krennic had never known it not to be pouring whenever he arrived. He probably wouldn’t even have thought about travelling over at all, were his old friend Galen Erso not stationed there. True, it was an integral facility to the Death Star, but Krennic didn’t need to be here to survey operations, just receive the odd mail or two with updates. Krennic would much rather be at the heart of the weapon his was engineering; it was his project and his baby. But, he wouldn’t miss the opportunity to see Galen, and this was fairly important. He grimaced as he looked out at the rain again, hopefully this wouldn’t take too long either… *** You weren’t sure if you’d ever get used to the constant rainy patterns of weather here. No-one had ever really given you the uniform for it – having said that, how often did you really spend outside these days? A lot of your time was spent in labs pouring over facts and figures and complicated algorithms. You spent almost as much time in the labs as Galen did, which was certainly personal choice rather than because you were forced into long hours. You had two specialities: lasers and gem stones; you’d heard about the development of synthetic Kyber crystals and Galen’s work before, but you’d never beheld a real one until coming here. With the amount of effort you were putting in, you were starting to become a technical expert. (Also a little disappointed to say the least when you found out that synthetic Kyber hadn’t really worked as expected.) Still, when you and Galen weren’t working on your pet energy project – allegedly what this had been for in the first place, until the real reason for Kyber research came to the fore – you were working on the Death Star. Which was some glorified super laser, that needed Kyber to work and… well, precision focus, as any good laser should have. Kyber wasn’t only going to be used as a power source, but also to make sure that this laser had range and trajectory… and didn’t waver off that. Besides, looking at the design, although it would collectively become one laser, it started at multiple points across the span of the dish. If just one of those was wrong, would the laser even fire at all? So standing outside on the landing platform, having been summoned out here because apparently the Director of the whole project would be arriving, in the cold and wet was not your ideal start to the day. Especially as you’d been standing here for what felt like close to an hour. Where the heck was this guy? You’d heard a lot about Orson Krennic before now; not all of it was great, some of it was hearsay, but there was a lot of information you found interesting to say the least. He’d been working on this project (with or without Galen) for most of his adult life, so it didn’t surprise you that he’d be coming all the way out here for an update. You had only ever had the pleasure of being copied on emails to Krennic and the way he responded sometimes was downright scary. You were glad you’d never had to give him bad news… but with your project being what it was, it wouldn’t be long before you did have to face the wrath of his block capitals. Finally the sound of a cruiser cut through the air, by the distinctive sound it was a Delta-class T-3c. Yeah, you had a slight passion for ships too. You all stood to attention on the platform, fighting off the shivers from the wind chill, squinting for visibility through the sheet rain and trying not to get blown over either. When the door to the shuttle opened Galen stepped forward, to welcome your visitor. He was possibly around Galen’s age, and held a confidence and self-importance about him as he strode forward down the ramp. But he had grace, too. You were almost taken aback by the way Krennic smiled as he shook Galen’s hand firmly, conversation fairly urgent. You couldn’t even lip read them from here, but body language was easy to interpret and it didn’t take long for Krennic to have your boss on the back foot. But it wasn’t panic, only surprise. Galen beckoned the Director towards the facility but Krennic shook his head. This visit was clearly only to be brief; you weren’t about to have your first interaction with him after all; he wasn’t about to view your work, inspect it closely and criticize it. Maybe you were glad of that. The conversation wasn’t as fleeting as you thought, a lot of back and forth that had the rest of you shooting each other looks and wondering how much longer you had to stand to attention in the freezing weather. Eventually Galen gestured to all of you – you supposed he was saying ‘if you can’t come in, or stay very long, at least meet my team.’ Krennic seemed to consider this for a time, his eyes sweeping the line and freezing on you. Your breath caught for a moment – maybe it was just your imagination, but his gaze was certainly lingering on you, and those bright blue eyes of his were nothing short of captivating. You didn’t think you’d seen a blue like it anywhere in the galaxy. It felt like hours but it could only have been seconds before he turned back to Galen, they exchanged a few words briefly once more before Galen nodded and they shook hands again. Oh, he really was just going to leave? The Director walked brisky back towards his shuttle before turning and calling back something else that he’d clearly forgotten. Galen yelled something in response and Krennic half smiled, before his eyes flicked over Galen’s shoulder and returned to you. Yes. You were right, he was certainly focused on you. There was a rumble of thunder overhead and the lightning cracked across the sky. You had never minded the lightning; you found the colours and patterns fascinating. But those blue eyes were immediately illumined by the bright white flashes and you found yourself swallowing hard, you couldn’t place the look on his face but you weren’t sure it was so appropriate. That image was sure to haunt you. Krennic turned back, slower this time, and you found that you’d been holding your breath for quite some time.

Suddenly you didn’t think that you would mind receiving an email in block capitals from him at all. *** Galen was probably the least subtle he could possibly be when he was trying to be subtle. He’d been tiptoeing around something with you for a couple of days and it really was starting to annoy you. You slammed your stylus down on the table with a frustrated sigh and turned to him. “Galen, please, whatever it is… just tell me. You’re making me nervous!” He blinked a few times, taken aback by your tone – as if he hadn’t been making it very obvious. “I- I don’t want you to get the wrong idea.” You laughed, “Now I certainly will! What’s going on?” “…It’s not my idea, but it is my decision.” “What is?” You suddenly became scared yourself, “Are you firing me-!?” Galen’s eyes widened and he held his hands up, “What? NO, no… quite the opposite. I am…” He paused and thought to rephrase his question, “They need a crystallographer on the Death Star. A good one. Someone who can keep up with the team here. One who knows what she’s talking about.” You blinked a few times, before you understood, “You’re… sending me to the Death Star?” “Yes. B- but only if you want to go!” Wouldn’t that place you directly under Krennic’s authority? Why was it suddenly an exciting prospect? “I would be honoured. This is- your decision?” “They asked me for recommendations and there was only ever one choice.” That had you beaming, “Thank you for the opportunity, Galen.” “Well, I know you won’t let the facility down. And you’re always welcome back.” You chewed your lip thoughtfully for a second, and couldn’t help but ask: “What is he really like?” “Who?” “The Director.” Galen didn’t really answer the question, although a smile twitched on his face, “We met in the Futures Program. I’ve known him a very long time… I can’t say he’s ever changed.” “So he’s an adult teenage boy?” Maybe that was the wrong thing to say, but Galen laughed. “Well, he has qualities that you’d be forgiven for thinking he was one.” “Huh.” You nodded, “I’ll keep that in mind.” “But he is brilliant, of that there is no doubt. The Death Star project may have been going a long time, but I doubt anyone else could have completed it the way he has. Sharp. Intelligent. You’ll like him, I think.” You wondered if you already did. “Well, we’ll see if I’m begging to come back any time soon-!” He chuckled gently, “Well, I certainly hope not.” It didn’t take you very long to pack up, you were practically living out of boxes as it was. And you weren’t sure if you were nervous about having to move or not. You supposed you were in two minds; you’d actually get to see and be on the Death Star while you worked – sure the plans were one thing but, once you got a feel for the actual structure, maybe you could even be a little more experimental… The advantage of being on Eadu was you could hide away in a lab and make the 10,000 mistakes to get to the one (usually accidental) breakthrough. You were the only one judging yourself here, it was quiet; out there, and under Krennic, all eyes would be on what you were doing. You’d maybe be given the leeway of 2 or 3 mistakes but none more than that. And everything would be urgent. Needed yesterday! It was a good thing that you could work under pressure. Leaving was hard, and as you hugged Galen goodbye you couldn’t help but feel a pain in your heart: “I wish it didn’t mean leaving.” “You deserve it.” “Maybe. I hope I get to come back, eventually.” “We’ll certainly welcome you with open arms!” “Take care of yourself, Galen.” “And you – if he gives you any trouble, come straight to me.” You nearly grimaced, “Noted, but I really hope it doesn’t come to that!” *** The cruiser that picked you up wasn’t his, and you were glad the journey wasn’t as long as you expected, so you didn’t have too much time to overthink what was happening to you. In fact as the Death Star loomed into view your mouth was agape – you weren’t sure you expected the sheer size of it: easy to look at some numbers on a datapad but, when it was in front of you, you thought you might have bitten off a little more than you could chew. You were equally pleased and disappointed that Krennic was neither there to pick you up or greet you on the station – mostly because you didn’t seem to be able to find any appropriate words to say. The bustle of engineers, technicians and general command staff told you you were a million miles from your lab on Eadu, and you found yourself unable to communicate in anything other than one word awe filled sentences. Thankfully the Officer who greeted you seemed to understand, and as she walked you to your lab (everyone was obviously eager for you to start!) she chuckled warmly, “Don’t worry, I was exactly the same when I arrived here. It’s a lot. You’ll get used to it – and from what I understand you’ll be a very welcome addition to our team.” “Thanks,” You swallowed hard, “yes, I understand there’s an expectation on me here.” “Well, the Director only wants the best of the best.” She keyed you into the lab and then handed you your pass, “If you’re here it’s because you are the best. And he wants you.” You tried hard not to think about that in any way other than for your work, but it was hard. Ever since that look he’d given you as he left, those vivid blue eyes filled your dreams – including those that you’d rather Krennic kept out of. As she continued talking, she snapped you back to reality: “Anyway, I will leave you to get settled in here, all your things will be sent to your quarters. I’ll have someone sent up with all the details and your datapad.” She grinned at the door before she turned to head out, “Welcome to the Death Star!” *** You spent your time unpacking all your laboratory kit - some of this work you’d only trust to go right with your own gear that much was certain - before you started examining the lab closely. Everything was, as expected, state of the art, they had every machine it was possible to get in order to aid you on your quest to get these vectors just right. If the work wasn’t quite so serious this was almost a wonderland for you. As you continued to stare around the lab, making mental notes of exactly which you would need and would be the most useful for your work, the lab doors slid open again to another visitor. You turned to explain yourself away as the new girl but immediately froze. Standing opposite you, also seemingly glued to the spot and an unreadable look on his face, was none other than Director Krennic. You weren’t sure you expected to see him so soon, and you were still thoroughly unprepared for it. He recovered better than you. “I was told my new hire had arrived. You-” He paused for a minute, head tipped, before a small smile appeared on his face, “You’re from the Eadu facility!” After all, Krennic hadn’t asked only Galen for help in recruiting – you just had the best credentials. But he certainly recognised you from that platform. “Yes, Sir, Galen sent me – he said you were looking for a good crystallographer.” “Yes. And you’re here, welcome. It’s good to finally meet you in person.” “The honour is mine, Director, I look forward to working with you.” You swallowed hard, “Believe me, it is me that is honoured… uhm?” “Oh, Y/N, Sir.” Then you blushed forgetting yourself, “Ah! Officer L/N!” That smile became a gentle smirk, “Would it be so awful for me to refer to you by your first name?” “…I’m sorry, I… It’s how we do things on Eadu, I… realise that I am not there anymore Sir, forgive me.” You could feel yourself getting hotter. “You need not be forgiven, Y/N. I’m happy to do things your way.” Krennic placed a datapad on the table in front of him, “It’s all set up correctly, I made sure of that myself. I have to make sure my researcher is well equipped on the first day of her job, after all.” On top of it he lay another access card, “You’ll need that for your room, your ID will allow you access to almost as many files as me, I figured you’ll need them.” Krennic’s blue eyes fell back on you, “Anything you can’t access you come directly to me, and anything else you need, the same. I will make sure it reaches you promptly.” “Yes, Sir.” You nodded through his explanation, “Thank you.” Krennic nodded back, looking around the room, “Tell me, how do you like the lab?” “It’s certainly state of the art. There’s probably not another one like it across the galaxy. There’s a lot I would like to explore with these devices once I’m finished with my work for the Battle Station. Time permitting.” Krennic shrugged, “Do what you will with the time that you have free. I expect you’ll work hard.” “Yes, Sir.” “Good.” He winked stepping back from you, “I will leave you to get settled, and may I welcome you to the Death Star! I’m very excited to see what you can do for us!” And by that smirk on his face, yes, you could bet… Krennic hurried back to his office cursing himself. Yes, he wanted the best – and he had absolutely no doubt that he would get it with you. He’d read every CV in great detail; obviously he’d paid more attention to those from Galen, considering the weaponry was coming from that lab, but Galen had neglected to mention that you were with him on Eadu in his note for you. You were Galen’s first choice, and Orson Krennic was not about to go against his friend’s advice. It was just your look. Not just physically, but that look on your face – he couldn’t shake it. Now he could bet that your personality would be similar just to curse him… He didn’t fall in love often, not hard. Orson could fall in and out of ‘love’ with people very quickly – always liked to keep a string of bed mates, if he didn’t fall in love, and didn’t necessarily care, then he wouldn’t get hurt. And he hardly needed to put in much effort, a little bit of flirting and an expensive drink was all he usually needed. Besides, now Krennic had this rank bar and a reputation, so he probably needed even less: sometimes people were trying to pick him up – he couldn’t say he wasn’t flattered. On the occasions he did though – it usually had the proficiency to mess him up. You reminded him very much of a girl he’d known in the Futures Program – back when he was young and reckless. Okay, Krennic could back track on that sentence, young. That, first love, fast heartbeat, can’t stop staring, ‘only thing in the world that matters’ kind of feeling. The kind of love that at that age would make him naïvely think it’d be forever – where their ambitions would meld together and everything would just work out. Even if they had no idea how. Krennic would stand by it as a real love, a feeling he had chased since he lost her. He’d fallen that hard again since – sure – but never in the same way. Orson didn’t think you could ever get a ‘first love’ feeling back. And he certainly didn’t want to ever feel like he did when it ended again. But you, and your face, and your body, and that look you gave him – all Krennic could see in you was her. Turning to his datapad for a second he had half a mind to see who your parents were, then stopped short of himself. ‘Don’t be stupid, Orson, she’s too old for that!’ – even if marginally. It made him curious about you though, what if your personality was the same? What if all of these factors culminated in him… feeling like that about you. He almost cursed at himself. ‘Don’t be stupid, she works for you, and you’ll shake it. It’s just the shock, it’s two or three glimpses of her face – you’ll be able to pick out all the differences in no time. Then you won’t think about what you loved and lost… or yearn for it back.’ Krennic scoffed at the very idea of him yearning, but brought you up on his datapad anyway. A smirk started to spread its way across his face as he lingered on your photograph. Well, he certainly wasn’t averse to one of you getting messed up in the process of this partnership…

***

Krennic was right, one of you was going to get messed up by this; and it seemed more obvious now that person was going to be him. He wanted your personality to be different to hers, then he could form some distinction - and for the most part you had differences, you were your own woman. The problem was Krennic let himself get obsessed over the similarities, those small details that wouldn’t have mattered to anyone else. And if he was honest those parts of you that were nothing like her just messed him up even more, because he liked those too. He liked you for you. It worried him.

You busied yourself with your work and tried to keep out of everyone’s way. You very much hoped it might be ‘out of sight out of mind’; but knew with the importance of the project you wouldn’t have that luxury. That had you experimenting until the early hours of the morning sometimes - and you always sent Krennic an update email last thing before you went to bed. Just so he never had to come looking himself: you’d heard all about him, but now you were here you’d witnessed it yourself. And Krennic screaming at people in corridors was not something you were that ready for. You did not want that wrath coming down on you, so you tried to keep one step ahead of the man that knew this station inside and out. What amazed you was, as you placed your datapad down for the evening and settled into your sheets, more often than not you’d receive a ‘ping’ to let you know of incoming mail. You’d ignored it for a while but - being too curious - investigated, only to find Krennic had sent you a thank you note. ‘What the heck is he still up working for!?’ Well, this became a regular occurrence, and tonight was no different - only now you waited to see if he’d reply and you smiled as it came in. ‘Why can’t everyone do this? Do you know how well this Station would run!? Thank you. As ever. - K.’ You hovered over the reply button, as you had nearly all week. Every single time the knot in your stomach made you panic and you bailed out. Not tonight. ‘You are welcome, Director. Just doing my job. It’s getting late, you should probably get some rest.’ As he had, you signed off with your initial. It took him all of 5 seconds to reply, ‘I could say the same. Goodnight, Y/N. – K.’ ‘Goodnight, Director. Sleep well.’ You grimaced as the message flew off to the other side of the Death Star, was that a step too far? Oh well. Couldn’t take it back now!

Eventually your reports got shorter, not for lack of trying, but progress was slow. And you always tried to make ‘nothing really happened today’ last for as many pages as possible. But you realised quickly that Director Krennic was smart enough to read between the lines; he never asked for more than you gave him, but as he started asking you for progress updates, rather than waiting until you sent them, you knew he wasn’t far off the point where you might start receiving those dreaded block capital emails.

It wasn’t like what you’d done up until now wasn’t hard; it was. It was just now you were at a snagging point and you really didn’t want to have to redo what you’d already done to get past it. It also wasn’t something you could easily bypass. And you couldn’t ignore it. If you got this wrong that laser didn’t work - and it’d all come back on you. This calculation was going to take time you didn’t have - NOBODY had - and the pressure was starting to get you frustrated.

You didn’t actually receive a block capital email, but an impromptu visit to your lab. And the colour must have immediately drained from your face - to counteract the way your heart decided to beat like a kick drum - because Krennic raised his hands in almost apology. “Thought it might be quicker to ask you rather than you to write up a report.” “Well you already know it’s not going well.” “I know woolly language when I see it. You don’t need to use filler with me. If you’re stuck just say so.” “Forgive me, Sir, but I don’t exactly want to get yelled at, and there’s a lot at stake here.” You cursed yourself internally for being so comfortable with talking to him like this. But decided that it might be best to speak your mind. “Why would I yell at you?” You gave him a pointed look that Krennic understood, but he didn’t think you quite understood the question. Why would he yell at you? Instead he cleared his throat, “I understand… Why don’t you, walk me through it?” “Can you help?” It wasn’t meant to come out so disbelieving, and you thought you’d put your foot in it about 10 times during this conversation already - but Krennic just shrugged. “I’ll see if I can assist. Maybe I’ll have a perspective you’re not thinking of.” You took a breath, “Okay...” “Okay.” He gave a firm nod, and sat at one of the lab tables, “What exactly are you trying to achieve that you cannot?” You took a deep breath, “Think of holding a laser pointer,” you collected one, and as a demonstration you pointed it at the blank wall and clicked it on; “Even with a steady hand, or two hands, there’s movement.” The dot wasn’t wiggling much but Krennic nodded along, “Well, this station is just a massive destructive laser pointer, with 8 different lasers all coming together… so in fact there’s 9 laser pointers in total. Even a millimetre out can be the difference between this laser working, or catching on something we don’t want it to and blowing up Imperial Forces, or - god forbid - the entire station…!” You walked over to a little holder you’d rigged up, placing the pen upon it and stepping back: “Crudely speaking when focusing a laser through Kyber it should keep the laser's trajectory steady with pinpoint accuracy, whilst also maintaining the power and range of the laser. It’s a multipoint system, if even one of those points is off, the whole thing fails. And what better to take the power of a laser created by Kyber than…” “Kyber.” You smiled enthusiastically, “Exactly!” Krennic looked back at the dot on the wall, “So what’s your snag?” You turned the datapad to face him, “This.” He raised an eyebrow immediately, “That’s… a lot of numbers.” “Yes. And every time I calculate it, it’s an error. And it needs to balance because it’s got to work between-” “Nine lasers.” You said in unison. “Correct.” You smiled, liking that he was getting it. “I don’t expect Kyber not to be able to take the force, it’s the making sure we’re hitting it all just right. To check how much the crystals might refract the energy. To make sure there’s not a power surge… I just can’t get the power balance right to get the trajectory… not to do something ridiculously wild.” “Or make the whole station virtually useless.” “Yes. And the thing is that the number is nearly always the same. You know, like… I’m point-5 out, and yet I can’t figure out where that is coming from. Freakin’ crystals, and Kyber is notoriously the worst!” You placed your hands on your hips, “I’ll get it. I just need time.” He nodded, “You have time believe me.” Krennic stood, “I believe I should leave you to it.” “But the completion of the-” “Let me worry about that. You worry about getting my vectors right. You have time.” That he could promise you. Krennic didn’t want you to panic, he thought that would throw this project into even more disarray. He needed you with a level head and at your best mindset. He thought he knew how to do just that. You flushed, “Thank you, Director.” “Don’t mention it, Y/N.” He paused as he got to the door, turning back to you those blue eyes caught yours and you nearly jumped at the dark flicker across them. “I look forward to reading your report, tonight.” The way his voice lowered like that, how that smooth tone he usually kept laced with a growl had you struggling to breathe as he left, and you had to undo your uniform and catch your breath. ‘Geez, what was that!?’ Did you have a thing for your senior commander? A real thing!? Sure those damn eyes were always haunting your dreams, and he was nearly always your daily closing thought (but he put himself there, didn’t he!) but… this was more than that, this was a physical reaction - and you were sure he was eliciting an emotional one from you, too. “God dammit, Y/N,” you breathed, looking back to the door and wishing he’d come walking back through it, “could you have a worse idea-!?” *** He had to be honest he wasn’t sure why he had no semblance of control around you; it should have been easy to control. Krennic spent his life trying to control his emotions… okay, maybe not very well but he did. You had him smiling all over the place. He far outstayed his welcome in the lab whenever he found reason to go down there; and Krennic certainly found plenty of reason. Usually if he visited anyone at their work station he was either none too pleased with them, or he wanted their report - and quickly! - before he swept himself off to another meeting or urgent matter around the station. He liked the sound of your voice explaining things to him; and how every question he asked was met with not just an answer, but a good answer. Instead of a string of ‘I don’t know, sir’s. Nothing Krennic asked of you ever seemed like trouble either; then again he supposed you wouldn’t really want to refuse the Director of the Death Star what he wanted. It was obvious you wanted to remain here, and you were trying to do your very best to figure out all these algorithms alone.

Krennic sent you an assistant and even got you on calls with people in similar fields. The assistant stayed with you a little, until it got a little too complicated even for them and you dismissed them with thanks - you’d got a step closer, that’s all you could ask for. Eventually though, you had to reach out to Galen - and Krennic wanted to sit in on these calls. You wondered if it was because he thought the two of you would spend the majority of it dragging him - you rather thought you might be giving him a string of compliments with half the chance to do so. And the three of you started to break your work down to basics. Krennic’s new perspective aided more than you really wanted to admit to him, but he had this attitude that made you think he wanted to be useful here - and it made you more than a little suspicious. Maybe he really was spying on you both…

Krennic wasn’t sure if he wasn’t forcing the relationship to grow beyond appropriate parameters, all discussions did still revolve around work after all, but was happy that you were forthcoming. Spending more time with you meant he could analyse you more - and whilst you still very much reminded him of his ex-lover, you were becoming your own person. The person who filled his thoughts. You were almost his every waking moment. When in your lab together, even when Krennic was listening to every word, he was watching your body - the way you moved was fluid as you eagerly explained something and demonstrated. But meticulous and calculating when you were working on a screen - absolutely none of your energy was wasted that could have been used to think on the problem. And yet even every small movement you made was significant. Usually to cross through or correct a calculation. Change your vector arrows around a little. Krennic liked watching you do this too, because when it was all correct you gave this small satisfied smile, and even though it was to yourself, it was very endearing - it was one thing he always looked forward to seeing.

Tonight, as ever, Krennic was agonising over waiting for your report. No matter how exhausted he might be when he finally retired to his quarters for the evening, he always knew your end of day email would come through and Krennic forced himself to stay awake for it. Mostly so he could read too much into the string of ‘flirty’ emails that followed it, but he couldn’t have been the only one who read that energy. After all, sometimes he gratuitously flirted back, and you still kept responding. As soon as he heard that ping he rushed across the room to read it. You reporting was always concise even though you managed not to leave a single detail out - and now he knew more about your work, it was easier to understand and for him to scan through. Krennic would be more thorough tomorrow. ‘Thorough as ever, Ms. L/N. – K.’ ‘I like to make sure you don’t need to ask questions.’ ‘Where’s the fun in that? – K.’ ‘It helps me sleep better.’ ‘Me not ask questions about your reporting? – K.’ ‘Goodnight Director. Please get some sleep!’ He remembered the first time that he’d read that goodnight from you, how he’d stared at those words for a long time - heart stilled. It didn’t help him sleep at all, far from it. In fact nothing about you seemed to help anything - except Krennic thinking on you.

You were impressive - dare he say that you had more skill in your particular area than maybe even Galen did. That, added to the weight of his constant Futures Program reminder, kept you at the forefront of his mind constantly. Krennic found it very hard to concentrate on his own work; and his thoughts wandered, particularly in meetings he found to be less than stimulating. He’d poured over your CV and your previous published research time and again. Read all your imperial records and anything Intelligence could get hold of on you. Krennic knew almost everything there was to know, and yet he wanted to hear it all from you. And you seemed less than forthcoming with information that was personal. That almost worried him - maybe you weren’t looking for anything other than a professional relationship with him. Krennic wasn’t sure how much longer he’d be able to keep it that way; eventually he’d have to make some kind of move - he couldn’t let you go without you knowing. He wasn’t about to let you be the (other) one that got away. Not both of you. Time ticked on this evening, and he lay in his sheets wide awake. Work was making him drowsy; and he’d been up and down trying to work himself to sleep, but every time he put his datapad down and switched off the lights he was alert again. Krennic glanced at the clock and groaned, watching the minutes race towards his alarm. Unsurprisingly it was thoughts of you that were keeping him awake. Usually you were on his mind at night; you were certainly the last one before he turned the light off, but usually he could drift to sleep perfectly fine. Not tonight. Krennic placed his hands palm down on his stomach, inhaling and exhaling slowly: wasn’t that how you did it? Deep, slow, calming breaths. That evidently made things worse, and his breathing patterns this time brought with them fairly vivid images that occasionally he’d seen in dreams. Certainly none of them were very professional - and all of them were about you. ‘Stars-! Orson, stop it!’ But he couldn’t, and his mind wanted to play tricks on him, trying to make him imagine what it would feel like to touch your bare skin, to hear you moan quietly, the way you might say his name in elation. He growled to himself as heat gathered a little lower than his hands were. He moved them, breaths already short and sharp and not at all where he’d intended to be at… “This is a bad idea.” Orson groaned softly and bit his lip, squeezing his eyes shut bringing all those images back; did he really have any better ones? *** It wasn’t a lie to state you were getting closer. At least to the point where Krennic started to make jokes in meetings that were clearly meant for you only. And when you looked up to him unsure if it was appropriate to laugh and he’d almost dare you to, you knew they certainly were. He’d always ask for a score out of 10 in his emails to you now. And it was refreshing for you to find a similar relationship to the one you had with Galen here… well, maybe you shouldn’t have been surprised. They were good friends after all, and there had to be a reason for that. Krennic also made a habit of being wherever you were. And you weren’t sure that was so endearing. You understood why he would want to be around your lab - maybe not as often as he was, but then… perhaps you knew the reason for that too, you just didn’t want to hope on it - but not why he’d turn up in corridors he had no business being in. Or would end up in the cafeteria at the exact moment you walked in. He even ended up in staff briefings he’d specifically asked someone else to take either so he could sit or stand near you. You couldn’t help but find some of this behaviour odd: was Krennic stalking you? Was he looking out for you? Was he protecting you? You couldn’t imagine it was just coincidence - and part of you hoped it wasn’t. You just couldn’t really tell his intentions. That’s what scared you the most.

By now you’d heard the coffee room chat about Krennic - seemed he had a bit of a lady’s man reputation. Pretty smooth at getting you into bed, but would love you and leave you just as fast, and on-to-the-next-one. Were you simply the next one? Because as much as by now you wanted to be, you certainly didn’t want to be one on a list… love you was okay… but leave you? You weren’t the type of woman who would put yourself in that position. For him would you?

It made you a little more cautious around him, and suddenly that made your relationship slip. Because you didn’t know if you should be flirting with him or joking with him as much as you were. This pull back from you didn’t faze Krennic too much, just made him try a little harder. For you it then became obvious what he wanted. And you had to do your damndest to control yourself. You both did.

You were using every ounce of your Imperial training to try to ignore your feelings, to make sure your face stayed level and revealed nothing. You always tried to keep your eyes on his face; instead of the wandering they wanted to do - even when he wasn’t directly talking to you. That didn’t mean that when he was walking away from you, or simply keeping busy in your lab, you weren’t discreetly checking him out. You had to wonder what he looked like out of that uniform, considering he looked so gorgeous in it. You were inexplicably drawn to him, but you weren’t sure if it was his power you were attracted to: the rank bar on that uniform told everyone exactly who was boss and he walked like he owned every corridor in this place. He didn’t even need to exert his influence in meetings, everyone knew he was the most important man in the room. When Krennic had something to say everyone listened, even when he said it quietly. You’d never known someone to command that kind of attention, and considering that reputation you were not the only officer - of any gender - who fawned over him. You were just the best at hiding it. That charisma he exuded really was something to behold; he was just far too confident. Maybe a little conceited in it too, but you were sure you’d be powerless to it. The Director probably had the ability to walk up to you and say “Come to bed with me” and you’d go on that alone, you knew if he was so inclined, he could just say it like that. It was probably in your favour that Krennic liked to be a little more suave. Krennic seemed like one for class and grace. Or was it that you really were attracted to him, that you had some kind of undeniable chemistry. That you would almost count him a friend. That you just liked being in Krennic’s aura and talking to him about work… you’d even started to open up to him about personal stuff, where you’d grown up, your family… how exactly you’d ended up a crystallographer who was working here on laser vectors. And most importantly how much you loved storms, planetary or solar - this seemed like something you had to let him know. Just a silly little fact, perhaps, but to you it really meant something. It was little moments like that, when he laughed at your stories, that you thought this really might be mutual attraction, rather than someone Krennic just wanted to get in bed.

Yet, you had an effect on him also and he tried to hide it as well as you did. You caught it, only because you knew the look of someone trying to contain themselves. You saw it in the mirror or polished surfaces of this battle station all the time. Krennic quite often clenched his jaw around you, he had this habit of staring at you like he was staring through you; and sometimes he would just stare forward if you were next to him. That almost annoyed you, because you wanted to be able to look into those crystal blue orbs just once... But if Krennic was watching you, then it was an altogether different story, and if he ever caught you catching him, that look in his eyes didn’t disappear; it was hungry, and although it stirred something within you that you had to fight even harder to control, it scared you a little too - and in the back of your mind it lit a spark that became a raging fire. And you had to know, would he act on that look too? You made a vow, before you’d finished your work, before you’d left this battle station - you would find out.

Today hadn’t been so bad by all accounts; the test you’d set up you would have to leave overnight, so you got out of the lab on time. Maybe you’d even get an early night tonight. Maybe you’d persuade the Director to one of his own with your report email; you thought he probably needed it. A frown pulled its way across your face as you arrived at your quarters with the door open, and you poked your head around it, gasping to find other officers moving things around, and carrying what appeared to be boxes of your stuff. You hadn’t authorised this! “What’s going on!?!” You blurted, a little angrier than you’d meant, “What are you doing!?” Then you froze for a second; had you read something wrong? You knew something was up with him… but maybe you were supposed to have acted on it by now? Maybe your work was taking too long - was he pissed at you? Did Krennic want you off the station!? You looked to the most senior officer, “Am I being thrown off the project?!” “No.” At least you could breathe then, “We’re simply moving your quarters.” “Moving my quarters?” You couldn’t help but be confused: had you missed that email? It seemed a little too important to just be sprung upon you. “On whose orders!? I haven’t signed off on this!” “Director Krennic’s.” That shut you up almost immediately. ‘Oh well shit, what’s he moving me for!?’ You swallowed hard, not even caring if it was visible. “Well, in that case you better show me where I’m moving to…”

Once you got there - and they assured you that your key card would still work - you realised that you hadn’t just moved to any old room. Krennic had moved you to a commander's quarters, and it was plush to say the least. You had so much more room in here. The bay window stretched at least half the room and you couldn’t help your small smile; ‘he remembered’. Your little stories of staying up huddled in a window frame to watch storms in nearby, or passing, solar systems and planets. You shook your head slowly to yourself and picked up your datapad again, figuring out where exactly you were on the ship - further from the labs, which was a minor inconvenience. It seemed that at least there was an elevator close by that you could use to get to the right floor and then it’d be a straight walk. What interested you though was, looking at the schematic, you appeared to be just two corridors away from Krennic’s own room. That was not coincidence. “Son of a-” suddenly you found yourself laughing. Why? So he could walk past your room every day? So he had you closer? And looking at the rooms around, probably as close as he could get: you were surrounded by his senior command team.

You moved through the room, and started to notice little details that he’d had placed here; books by your favourite authors, or researchers… your favourite music. Maybe you’d told him far too much about yourself. But it was the fact he retained the information that had you impressed. He’d even left you a box, tied with ribbon in your bathroom, and when you pulled at it you found it was filled with very expensive toiletries, that you knew he wouldn’t have been able to come by easily, in all your favourite scents. Nothing is coincidence at all… is it Krennic? Was he trying to woo you - was this all part of a game plan; you could only conclude yes. And by the way your heart was currently beating in your chest, you had to say it was working.

Moving back into the main room and sitting back on the bed with your datapad, ready to send your report for the evening, you’d failed to notice the letter lying on top of your sheets. You pulled your finger across the top of the envelope and unfolded the card carefully: ‘Dear Y/N, Welcome to your new quarters. I believe someone of your talent is worthy of somewhere a little nicer. You will find me just down the hall if you need anything, and please do not hesitate. I hope you enjoy your stay here. And, should there be a storm, that you enjoy the view. Director Orson C. Krennic Head - Imperial Weapons Division’ The card also seemed to be scented, which you had to raise an eyebrow at; ‘who uses scented note cards?! What’s that all about!?�� You put it down to having more money than sense and placed the card on your bedside table, before getting back to what was really important.

As expected, even when it was a little earlier in the evening, Orson Krennic responded to your email almost immediately. ‘Earlier than usual? You really are efficient, Y/N. – K.’ ‘Thought I would get an early night in Director… in my new quarters. You should to.’ - You weren’t meant to imply together, but you also didn’t care if that’s how he read it. ‘Any thoughts? – K.’ ‘They are very nice, thank you. Although in future a little more notification would help!’ ‘Noted. And as you are closer, you can deliver your reports in person now – K.’ You raised an eyebrow, why would that make any sense? ‘When I can send it over email?’ Why... would you? Even when closer the time it’d take you to walk to his quarters, give him the document and walk back, would still be far longer than an email. ‘Consider it. – K.’ ‘I will!’ You weren’t sure you would, but that was what he wanted to hear. And of course you’d play to that whim. ‘Good. Goodnight, Y/N – K.’ ‘Goodnight Orson.’ You stared at the email after you’d sent it and almost screamed. What were you doing-!?! Why were you addressing a senior officer by his first name!? What was he bringing you to? You placed your head in your hands and took a deep breath. ‘Okay, it’s one slip and you can say you were tired and apologise profusely later…’

You threw your tablet on your table too and snuggled back under your new plush sheets. The bed was cozy and soft and suddenly you couldn’t be happier that Krennic had arranged for this. You closed your eyes; it was this time of the evening you liked to try and ground yourself. It was clear that both of you wanted each other to some degree, but you were the one that had to be sure about this and the most careful. You had more to lose here; Krennic had the ability to kick you off the project, not just out of his bed… if you ever got in it. But by now you were pretty sure you would end up in it. It was more a matter of when. He was powerful, you’d covered that. But Krennic was also dangerous, that much was also obvious… dangerous in terrible and delicious ways. So perhaps, as well as everything else, you were drawn to that danger. You wondered suddenly which side of him would show up more when it was just the two of you alone… in conditions more intimate. Would that power completely consume you; did you have any chance at all? You weren’t sure you wanted any at just the opportunity to be pinned under his body. To run your hands over his skin. To answer all the questions you had, and see if all those water cooler rumours were true… (You hoped to God some of them were.)

You were close to drifting off when your eyes suddenly snapped open. Krennic was your favourite pre-sleep thought, and your subconscious tonight brought you a revelation. That note card was not scented. You scrambled around for it and held it close to your face, inhaling. That was what Krennic smelled like - you should know because you’d always thought he smelt pretty good, it was a fairly subtle scent when on his skin - here it was a little stronger, which is why it had taken you so long to pick up on it.

That damn man had sprayed his note to you with his cologne. *** You decided that Krennic knew far too much about you. On the morning after your move you opened your door to head back to the labs, so you could check on the results of your testing, and Krennic was two steps from your door. You were startled by his sudden presence but he offered nothing but a small smile and a casual, “Right on time, Ms. L/N.” “Uh- I- Director.” You wouldn’t exactly say you greeted him as he felt in step with your walk towards the elevator. “How do you think your testing went?” “Well…” You took a deep breath, instantly regretting it as that cologne seemed to surround you completely. Now your senses were looking for it. Your stomach knotted and you felt the immediate urge to press your thighs together and groan. Dammit. “Well?” Krennic pressed, eying you when you didn’t answer. You hoped your face wasn’t flushing even though you felt hot. “It’s a make or break test. I certainly hope it’s worked.” You could hear that strained edge to your voice, you knew for certain Krennic would have picked up on it. As you turned into the elevator you immediately reached for your button, the Director was two steps ahead of you and your hands brushed. You withdrew yours immediately, and knew you must have been red by now. “S-Sorry.” “No, my apologies, I just wanted to help.” You stared at the floor of the elevator for a good few minutes, holding your fingertips in your other hand. Why did it tingle like that? You didn’t actually ever think you’d physically touched him before, had you? Even when you’d been so close previously in the lab. But it’s not even like it was his skin. In fact, for someone with such a reputation, Krennic had very little skin on display at all. Did he ever not wear gloves? Not that you could recall. ‘Stop-! Y/N! You sound so repressed! You’ve seen naked men before.’ Your eyes flicked back to Krennic, staring at the ceiling, and you swallowed hard. Sure, but you hadn’t seen him naked. The rest of the ride was conducted in silence, because you didn’t trust yourself not to blurt out anything you shouldn’t, but as you left Krennic took a step to stop the doors from closing. “What, not even a goodbye?” You paused in the corridor and turned back to him, unable to stop yourself from smiling that he actually wanted that from you. “Goodbye Director, have a good day.” “Not likely, but work permitting. Good day, Y/N.” and as the doors slid closed on him you caught his wink, and could swear he was smirking.

You stood outside your little lab for a long time before you entered. You admitted to yourself you were delaying the inevitable but you needed to. After all, if this was a complete failure then you might as well throw out almost a years’ worth of work. Well, maybe that was a bit dramatic, but at least all the months you’d been up here on the battle station. You’d need a good stiff drink and to cry in bed for a couple of days at the very least. Oh, and you’d probably be fired, reputation in ruins… You keyed yourself in and flicked on the lights. What you had done was rigged up a few small versions of the Death Star and set each of them to different vectors. The pieces of Kyber you were using were tiny, but they would still work in principle with your laser pens.

You stared at the points on the wall in turn. One had disappeared completely, which was all but useless to you. It didn’t mean that the calculation wasn’t steady: it could have just meant that the trajectory was way off. Either way, you could discount that as a failure. And the next one; giving a similar waver to when you’d shown Krennic what ‘steady hands’ really meant. Although minimal, you’d already explained why you couldn’t stand for it. That left the last two. And the results looked fairly similar even though your vectors were different for both. You had to call the result unexpected: perhaps there were two ways to do this. You looked back to your little models and then to the points, waving your hand in front of the lasers. And then you smiled, and that small smile became a grin, became a laugh of triumph. Although both were near perfect, the third one had a far stronger beam of light. There was your power. The second most important part of the project. The station had to do what it was built for when the laser reached its target, after all. “We have a winner.” You whispered to yourself walking back to your table. Now you had to report these findings and scale them up to full size. Working in other contingency factors - after all that laser would not be travelling through clean air in a lab and hitting a solid smooth wall. That would be fun. Still, you couldn’t wait on his report to tell him the good news. ‘Report spoilers: It works!’ There was a long pause between emails, and you could picture Krennic sitting at his desk, relief flooding him, smug little smirk on his face that this was finally going to get done - the finish line seemed in sight now. You hoped you’d made his day. When the email came back you couldn’t help but read into it a little more than you probably should have, and yet you also thought he wanted you to: ‘This sounds like a cause for celebration... – K.’

You did not in fact bring the report to him by hand, and neither did he ask it of you, but from that day forward you were called into his office daily briefings. And suddenly you got to realise just what your research meant to the people working on this station, because the first day you walked in, expecting to see just him, the room was full of his top engineers and each and every single one of them was applauding you. “Now the real work begins.” Krennic was leaning against his desk, arms folded, with eyes only for you. “Welcome, Y/N, to the team that will build your concept. From physical engineering to coding. I will assist in overseeing you, but the team are now at your disposal. From now, until test day.” Your eyes couldn’t help but light up, even though you knew you should have probably been professional about this. “Thank you, Director.” You beamed, “I look forward to working with all of you. Let's make this vision a reality, for the Empire!”

Suddenly this was better than anything you’d had with Krennic before - you almost had non-stop contact with him, from walking out of your door in the morning, to retiring for the evening. And you were happy to find that he provided both the perfect intellectual and humorous stimulant. You also noted how many crew members now looked at you with nothing but jealousy. Despite the fact nothing had happened between you yet. The way he regarded you was now even more open. Every look that followed every little flirtatious comment or innuendo was extremely pointed. Sometimes his eyes would even darken. It scared you enough to have you shy away from him; but also had you scared at how much you desired him. You just wanted him to touch you, just the smallest taste. To be honest you didn’t care what he did, as long as he did something. Krennic could bend you over his desk in front of your entire engineering team for all you cared anymore.

Speaking of your engineering team, you’d never seen a group of people work harder or more efficiently, and seeing them turn all your data and tiny models into tangible pieces for the Death Star was wonderful. You gasped to see the sheer size of the Kyber they had harvested to give your vectors pinpoint accuracy. “I have never… seen Kyber like that!” And the way Krennic got all smug again, “Only the best for you. Of course.” “You flatter me, Sir.” And that little knowing nod he gave you back. Once everything started to go into place, and you got word that Galen was almost finished with the laser itself (you received many an email from him about how proud he was and so many others from your friends back on Eadu that you almost cried, thanking them again and again for their participation in even the smallest part of your research), that the dish was currently in the process of being assembled outside and you couldn’t believe you were doing this. You couldn’t believe you were about to be a part of history. Your name was going to be right up there. Never even in your wildest dreams... As you could take a little more time over your reports these days, and there was far less for you to really comment on, you did start to present Krennic with physical copies. Usually just before you headed off for the evening you would drop them off on his desk with a small smile, and he would drag them towards him. “Glad to see you are taking my advice.” “Well, as you seemed fairly adamant I did it, I thought I had better start, Director.” “They do make for good bedtime reading.” “I’ll bet…” Only for the last week you’d started spraying them with your perfume, very subtly at first, but steadily the scent became stronger, and oh, he had noticed. When the doors closed behind you this evening he held the report to his nose and inhaled, groaning as heat coursed through his body. Krennic couldn’t take it any longer, he knew exactly what you were doing. Both of you were dancing around it, and now neither of you were being very subtle, either. But this was the final straw - because he wanted this scent all over him. What it would feel like to pin you beneath him, have your body against his as you whined and called his name, what it would feel like to finally be inside you… He’d certainly thought on it in quieter moments of the evening enough… *** Tonight your report was late. Not for no good reason; you had a lot of data to review. Galen kept sending you updated laser figures to get you as close as possible with your final vectors. Oh, you had no doubt that the Kyber could take it. You’d given a wide berth for the perimeters; but still, you wanted to check and triple check. On your head be it if you didn’t and everything went wrong. Still you wanted to stop by Krennic’s office to let him know why it would be late, as you always seemed to bring it to him around this time these days.

Krennic looked up as you walked in, without even knocking, but he hardly cared about that. His eyes narrowed at the lack of papers in your arms. “Where is my report?” Your face scrunched a little, “If you’d let me get a word out Director, I would tell you. I have a lot of data back from Galen that I want to check and double check before I send it over to you. I want to give you as accurate data and results as possible. So it’ll probably be late, or later than it has been these past few weeks.” Krennic tilted his head, eyebrow raised “Late?” He didn’t sound very appreciative. “Only about as ‘late’ as used to be normal.” He rose from his chair, and those blue eyes locked on yours, “Late-late bedtime reading? This from a woman who says I should be going to bed earlier.” “This once!” You protested as he rounded his desk. “You think that’s good enough?” You didn’t understand why he’d be mad at you, and Krennic didn’t sound mad… but the words he was using… “Well I didn’t think you’d mind.” “Oh, believe me, I mind.” “I-” You were about to tell him you were sorry - although really you had nothing to be sorry for - but he didn’t stop beside you. Instead Krennic stood behind you, a little too close for your liking.

You froze immediately as his voice lowered to a whisper, reaching out to brush a lock of hair behind your ear. The scrape of leather against your skin made you shiver, and you only wished it was his fingertips. You bit back your moan. “I am alone in my quarters after 2200 hours, it sounds like I’ll have data to review with you: that’s an order.” You swallowed unsure of the kind of response he wanted, “Yes, Sir.” slipped out of your mouth and he seemed satisfied. “Good girl. I want it on paper, as you’ve been doing recently.” “Yes, Sir.” “Well then…” He stepped away from you and you realised that you’d barely breathed for the past few minutes, “You best get to it, hadn’t you?” “Yes, Sir.” What was wrong with you!? Was that all you could say!? When you turned around he’d already moved away, crossing the room. “Good. Now go. And don’t make me wait, Y/N.” Krennic glanced over his shoulder at you, blue eyes burning, “As I’m sure you know by now, I am not a patient man.” *** You had to admit the pressure was on now. Because you did really want to present him with a decent report. (Just in case he wasn’t messing with you and he would be pissed if you didn’t turn up at 2200 with the correct figures.) And you sat back in the lab speed typing your way to the end whilst also trying to be as careful about Galen’s calculations as possible. You were right of course, his new figures still worked perfectly within your own. You looked at the clock, 2130. And the Director had told you not to be late. You printed the report and rushed back to your quarters; your heart was beating on overdrive. Was this about to be the encounter you’d always imagined? The throbbing ache between your thighs you’d also been trying (and failing) to ignore since he’d brushed his fingers to your skin earlier certainly hoped so. You barely had time for a quick shower to freshen up, but you took it anyway before changing and spraying yourself with that same perfume you’d been dousing your reports in, and hoping you wouldn’t run into anyone in the two corridors that you would have to traverse.

You checked yourself in the mirror as you gathered the hard copy of the report and your datapad for back up. You looked flushed, but still pretty at least. Taking a deep breath to calm yourself for your walk - you had a feeling you were about to end up being even more so… You paused suddenly and turned to the window; the colour of space had suddenly caught your eye. Purples and blues fogged in front of you, instead of the usual endless rolling black flecked with stars. It shimmered every so often and you recognised it instantly. ‘An Ion storm is coming…’ you breathed. You hadn’t noticed because your lab had no windows, but you were overjoyed that you hadn’t missed it. You allowed yourself to marvel it for a few seconds more before you realised you were about to make yourself late. Padding down the corridors you were pleased to see that there was no-one on route and you reached his room at exactly 2159. You waited for that minute to tick over, and at 2200, you knocked.

“Enter.” Krennic’s voice called you, with a sultry edge to it. And you bit your lip gently. At the sound of his voice his door slid open, and beckoned you inside. *** If you thought your room was spacious and had a generous window, this one was something else. Krennic’s quarters had a window that swept almost the entire far end of the room, and your eyes couldn’t help but be drawn to those vibrant purples and blues again. The lighting was fairly dimmed but you recognised it as ambiance; Krennic was setting a mood here. That feeling stirred once more in the pit of your stomach and you swallowed hard, the room had all the amenities, and you wondered why the hell he even wanted an office as well as this. Probably because he didn’t want everyone in his room, you guessed, but he had a desk and everything here. You scanned across the room to the bed; at least king sized, the sheets looked comfortable and luxurious. Why didn’t that surprise you either.

Footsteps approached from your left and Krennic swept around the corner from whatever had been keeping him occupied. He halted, immediately tipping his head to survey your body - instinctively you pulled the papers up to your chest and hugged them close. “I-I believe you asked me here to take you through a data review, Sir. And I made sure to print them all.” He hadn’t even traced his way up to your face yet and that smile became a grin, became a smirk. Krennic stepped forward - bless you for actually printing the damn report. He held his hand out, “Indeed I did.” You offered up the paperwork and he walked back to his desk, beckoning you to follow him. He could already smell the perfume on the documents, biting back a low moan. He had no intention of reading them tonight. In fact you hadn’t even sprayed the documents with your perfume, but there was so much of it on you that when you’d held them close it couldn’t help but transfer across. Krennic set them, and your datapad, down on his desk and turned back to you, now a little further into the room. Your hair was down to natural length and framed your face delicately. There were no shoes on your feet either. But your dress… oh… Ending just appropriately long enough to cover everything, the silk slip dress - in your favourite colour, Krennic remembered - plunged pretty low, thin straps looped over your shoulders and, he couldn’t see yet, but it had a low back too. At least you were dressed appropriately for where your evening was going to go. Krennic swallowed, aware of his own arousal as he made his way slowly back over to you, again, instead of stopping in front of you he rounded your body. Where he was close the cape brushed against your bare skin and you had to bite your lip hard not to whimper. Why was just the feel of it so sexy? Was it really the thought of being covered in it and nothing else? Would he wear it if you asked him to…? No, maybe not for your first time together… you didn’t think he’d want you making too many demands of him.

“I checked the weather for today and it looks like there will be a good ion lightning storm in the area. We can’t exactly move out of its way so… I thought you might like to observe…” “You remember a lot of things about me, Director… this one I might just have to thank you for.” Even as he disappeared behind you again you kept your eyes front on space, although you couldn’t help but be curious if he was going to touch your hair again. It hadn’t escaped your notice that he was finally gloveless. I really AM like a repressed maiden! He halted, and somehow it felt like he was even closer than before; was Krennic’s breath on the back of your neck just your imagination? You shivered involuntarily and even if you couldn’t see him, you could picture that smirk. His voice was at a husky whisper, already threatening to drive you wild. You didn’t dare press your thighs together, despite your desperation. “This dress is certainly not regulation uniform, and as per the rules, that would mean it needs to be removed.” You didn’t even get the chance to wonder if Krennic was going to do it himself as his large hands rested on your shoulders for a moment. You couldn’t help but tense; it seemed like such a foreign concept, his bare skin touching yours. You wondered if his hands would be calloused with all the work he did. He certainly didn’t mind getting dirty. But he was an architect at heart, and his hands seemed pretty smooth, assured, and warm… he was so warm… Krennic caressed his fingertips over you and you really couldn’t have helped that small whine even if you’d have tried. You were still picturing that delicious little smirk in your head, and you wanted to kiss it off. Patience… At this rate you’ll be getting to do more than that... His fingers slid under the straps, pulling them off your shoulders agonisingly slow, but Krennic didn’t attempt to help the fabric down your body, instead he just let it fall. It pooled around your feet and you swallowed hard again, hearing the slight chuckle in his voice before he tsked you. “You didn’t think to wear anything underneath?” “Well I thought about it, but-” You gasped as his hand grasped your waist, sliding down to your hip, his other brushing your hair back to expose your neck. Krennic’s first kiss wasn’t even tentative; but it was teasing and you shook under his touch. He smirked into your neck as he continued to kiss a trail. You bit back a groan, closing your eyes to the sensation of his lips on your skin, sighing for certain as his tongue ran over you. Had you told him this too? Or did he really know far too much… Finally having him kiss you after all this time was something that you almost found indescribable, and the heat between your thighs made you press them together as discreetly as possible - he’d get there you were sure of it, but that ache demanded attention. Krennic inhaled - and somehow that perfume smelled even better on your skin. He growled, grazing his teeth over your jugular, pulling your body back into his. “Oh… Y/N… you smell so good.” You gasped again as this time his arms locked around your waist to hold you in place; so close that his cape once again brushed your skin, you simply lay your hands over his. His still clothed body pressed up against yours felt simply divine and you knew Krennic was about to drive you insane, on purpose. As those kisses to your neck became a little hotter - and you started to imagine all the marks about to be left on your body - you couldn’t resist tipping your head back to sigh his name. You couldn’t be sure which he wanted to hear, but surely he would tell you if it was his first name. Maybe he didn’t want his lovers to call him that… you remembered your promise not to become just one on a list, but you didn’t want to think too hard on that right now. Much more enjoy the moment. You leant your body weight back against him, suddenly feeling tiny in his large hands. He smirked into your skin again, pulling back, one hand coming back up to turn your face to his.

“My, my… You’re already so flushed and… responsive.” That little smirk was so gorgeous you had second thoughts about kissing it off. You were already aware of how heavy you were breathing. Krennic bit his lip and somehow that made him sexier, “Have you thought about this?�� You nodded, hardly seeing the point of lying. “A lot?” You knew the blush on your cheeks was only getting deeper as you nodded again. Krennic chuckled, “At least I’m not the only one…” He held you in place by your chin, “Whatever your fantasies are, you can tell me. But I can promise I’ll be better.” He studied your face intently, “Would you like me to kiss you, Y/N?” You wondered if that was a stupid question, eyes flicking to his lips and back to that intense stare he was giving you, “Y-Yes.” Surprisingly his kiss wasn’t as rough as they had been to your neck, but he showed no mercy when deepening it, and his tongue wasn’t about to let yours assert any dominance. You could taste hints of alcohol and caffeine, and something sweet - although you could hardly remember what they were serving in the canteen now. When Krennic finally released your lips to let you breathe, you were panting even harder - how was it possible to feel that power even in his kisses; you were going to be completely at his mercy all night and right now it was a delightful prospect. The wealth of experience he had meant he could surely show you a thing or two. The next graze of his lips to yours was fleeting, and he drew from you a whine. By his smile exactly what Krennic wanted. His hands wandered as he pressed a kiss into your shoulder, down the run of the pulse in your neck and over your clavicles to your breasts. Keeping those steely blue eyes on yours you were hardly able to look away as his fingertips brushed over your sensitive nipples. Even your attempts to stifle your groans didn’t work and you closed your eyes to his touch as he circled his fingertips around one. “You are so fucking beautiful…” He nudged your head gently with his own to expose your neck to him once more, “And you sound fucking beautiful too…” “K-Krennic…” You mumbled his name again, once again fixating on his fingertips as he moved them across to your other breast, repeating the same teasing circular motion before he kneaded you. You thought you’d read somewhere that you could orgasm just from this - and right now you’d believe it; feeling that sticky sweetness on your inner thighs. At this rate you weren’t going to last until Krennic touched you there. “Maybe we’ll have to make this your regulation uniform.” His voice was husky, “I’m sure I could have that rule changed just for you.” You shuddered again as he pinched your nipple between his fingers playfully, “Would you like that?” “O-Only f-or you.” You might as well go for it; he might as well know exactly how you felt. “Ahhhh!” Krennic vocalised like he’d just figured it all out, “Should I just keep you here? Or in my office? I hold a great many meetings there, though… I’m not sure I would like them all staring at you in your uniform.” He growled into the next kiss he placed to your skin, “I get jealous too, you know?” Well you did now.

Krennic straightened himself to full height, still supporting your weight his hands travelled down your body agonizingly slow; almost as if he was committing every inch of you to his memory. You already knew he liked details - and he was an architect; so it was Krennic’s business to know detail. Just how much could he remember about a lover? How much of you were you prepared for him to discover about you. His fingertips traces over your ribs, down and across your bellybutton and just below your stomach when he paused and his eyes left you. For a moment you’d quite forgotten that you were in the middle of an ion storm, and you wondered what exactly had dragged his attention away from you. The illumination of his face in the first strike of lightning made you gasp. And all you could think of was those eyes in the rainstorm on Eadu. The first time you’d ever seen him, an image that still haunted you. That was no doubt responsible for you now being naked in his arms like this. You turned to the window to watch the lightning for a moment too, flashing across the purples, blues and pinks of the cloud. “Isn’t it beautiful.” You breathed gently, and you heard him chuckle, “I don’t think you’ve looked in a mirror.” This time he pressed his kiss to your temple, and it was almost sweet. But now Krennic had you distracted by the storm - so his fingers traced lower and before you knew it he was pressing down gently on your clit. Your body gave a lurch into his and he growled again. Moving his fingers into your folds, you moaned head tipped back onto his shoulder, “Krennic…” “I knew you wanted me, Y/N, but like this?” His fingers moved through your wetness, teasing your entrance for a moment, and making you shudder, moaning his name again. “I can see that desire in your eyes wasn’t lying…” Krennic was smirking again as he watched you react to his fingertips, dragging them back towards your clit, “How many times have you been this wet around me, hmm? How many times have you thought of me doing this? Do you touch yourself and think about me? Is that what you do?” “Y-Yes-” Your thoughts were hardly coherent at this point, and as soon as his fingers touched your clit again, in teasing circles, you cried out; “Oh, Krennic, please!” “What else do you do to yourself when you think about me, hm?” He put a little more pressure on your clit as he rubbed it, “What do you think about? Me touching you like this? Or me fucking you? What set you off, hmmm? All that water-cooler chat? Believe me I know what they say... How would you like me to do it, Y/N? Do you want me to try to be gentle, or do you want it rough?” As if you really cared; your body shuddered again and you attempted to help the friction by closing your thighs once more, ache becoming a throb. “Uh uh.” His foot jammed between yours and forced your legs to widen for him, “I don’t like cheaters, Y/N.” You moaned once more as those little circles got faster and rougher, “Please, please! Krennic I’m begging you…” You whined, and your voice shook as you could feel that pleasure building, he couldn’t stop now. You wouldn’t let him, “Do whatever you want to me… just fuck me.” He nipped the top of your ear this time, “The pleasure will be all mine.” This time as the lightning flashed it illuminated your body, and Krennic was right, your dips and curves were flawless, you looked ready for him, you felt ready for him… like you were made for this very moment. Krennic moved his fingertips faster - and this time he pushed his body into yours. Your gasp at his grind into you was for one obvious reason; you could feel how hard he was getting. Oh, fuck... Your body shuddered once more and you mewled, positive that you were even wetter now. He knew it too, by that chuckle. “Oh? You want me don’t you? I know you know how wet you are… You want me so fucking bad…” That husky whisper was driving you crazy and you knew Krennic wasn’t going to let up on it, “You feel so hot, so fuckable… Oh, Y/N, I can’t wait to be inside you, but you’ll have to wait for that.” This time your groan was a little strangled, “That’s it, be a good girl… cum for me.”

If it wasn’t what he was doing to you it was his voice alone that sent that shot of pleasure right through you, burning head to toe with no mercy. You cried out again, but this time it was his first name you used - and you hoped he didn’t care. Panting as you felt the sweat begin to gather on your skin. Your legs shook a little but he held you strong. “Good girl.” He removed his fingertips from your clit, once again pressing a kiss to your neck, “But, you know as well as I that this is hardly over…” You rested your body against his chest for a minute, and he carded his fingers through your hair; it was almost soothing as Krennic twisted it between his fingers, “How about we use the bed now, hmm?”

“…Y…Yes…” You could only hazily agree, would he actually fuck you now? You were throbbing again - sure he’d said he wanted to be inside you, but did he know how much you needed him inside you? “Go on,” Krennic pushed you forward with his hand to the small of your back, you stumbled a little but didn’t fall and he observed your walk, the curves of your ass - the lingering of your arousal on your thighs. “Hands down.” He followed you across the floor - he was aware of how uncomfortable he felt, with heat in just the right places, and the way his pulse was running just to look at you. But he had to take this slow. The goal wasn’t just to bed you, it was to erase every other man from your memory too, so that he was your one and only waking thought.

You had to admit your confusion, but placed your hands out on the sheets in front of you to support your body, Krennic made you keep your feet on the floor and for a second you wondered if this was how he was going to do it. It seemed like a waste of a good bed, but your brain was hardly running your feelings here and that throb between your legs was so desperate for something that you didn’t care how you got it. Instead of hearing him shed clothing, or even just undo his zipper, Krennic’s fingers ran your spine. He really was about to commit every inch of you to memory, you weren’t kidding, before he traced them over your ass. You were half expecting him to slap you, but that didn’t happen either. In fact his fingers went right back to your wetness, and you shivered again; Krennic’s movements this time were less teasing as he pushed his fingers into you; you cried out - he didn’t even bother with one at a time. But at least there was something dulling that ache for a second; although you knew what your body really craved. The storm illuminated everything in the room, and far more regularly than before, as his fingers pumped in and out of you. The hums he was making were satisfied, and part of you wished you could see what they looked like crossing his face. In fact the thought that you might not get to see his face almost disappointed you. But you realised something else, the colours the storm were throwing everywhere, the very sound of it - with how much you enjoyed them anyway - and Krennic here with you, was only serving to turn you on even more. And he noticed. “Oh?” This sounded almost curious, “So lightning makes you even more wet, or is that just me?” You swallowed hard, against the feeling of his fingers stretching you, you were desperate for him to get naked now. “To… be honest, no-one has ever fucked me in a lightning storm.” “Huh. Maybe they should have tried, I figure they’re missing out.” You whined again, “Krennic please… please… I can’t take much more of this… fuck, I… I need you.”

You weren’t sure if Krennic did it because he was listening to your plea, or if he was simply just ready to do it himself, but the next thing you knew he’d removed his fingers from you and flipped your body so you were now on your back, on the bed. And as your eyes locked with his you realised exactly what you would have been missing out on. Although serious, those eyes were so incredibly dark and lust rimmed, and hungry for your body, that you thought you might come undone again right then and there. He placed his thumb delicately against your lips for a second, tracing them, before smirking again, “Open your mouth.” You blinked, but finding no reason not to do what he asked, your lips parted, tongue grazing his fingertip. Krennic immediately smirked, “That’s a good girl.” Before he slid the two fingers that had just been inside you, into your mouth. You moaned gently at the sensation. “I bet you taste so good, don’t you?” You could feel yourself blushing again, unsure exactly how to respond to that besides another muffled moan. He withdrew them, eyes narrowed even though he was smiling.

“And you do exactly what I say…” Krennic drew himself back to height, dragging his eyes down your body and as he did so he reached up to his shoulders, undoing the fastenings for his cape. Oh, you were going to get to watch Krennic undress? You moved to help him, but his eyes raised back to your face - and this time the bright white flash made those eyes of crystal blue let you know that he wanted you to stay absolutely still. “You look ready for me darling. Are you?” You nodded, hoping that the look on your face was as pleading as you thought it was. “Born ready for me…” Krennic’s voice this time sent chills through you with how commanding it was, “Mine.” You watched the cape fall to the floor and wished again for that silky texture to brush against your skin, perhaps you would ask him again later. He undid his tunic and shrugged himself out of it; Krennic wasn’t exactly bothering to put on a show for you - but it still felt like one, running his hands through his hair with a breath out before he undid his shirt. Slower now, button by button as he looked into your eyes, that little teasing smile on his face only made your lips part. This man was so gorgeous. And you were here, in his quarters, in his bed. You out of the many hundreds of women on this Battle Station - and all of them beautiful - Director Orson Krennic wanted you. He threw his shirt behind him too, before settling his hands on his waistband. You studied him for just long enough, he was built more toned than chiselled, and his arms and chest were particularly defined; there was a scar on his left-hand side, just above his heart, and you wondered what the story was with that. Maybe in a quieter moment you would ask, but that was not a story for right now. You traced back to where his fingers were waiting for you to take him all in and this time you bit your lip, you’d already felt him against you but you still weren’t sure you were adequately prepared… Undoing his zip with as much tease as his buttons Krennic let his pants and boxers fall at the same time. Your eyes widened, and you swallowed hard ‘Oh, holy shit...’ Your heartbeat picked up pace and you felt yourself clench greedily just at the sight of him. You bit your lip a little harder and raised your eyes back up Krennic’s body to his face, “I want to let you know - although it sounds like you do know - that every single one of those rumours is SO fucking true.” He smirked, “I might have started one or two of them myself.” You almost laughed, “Why doesn’t that surprise me?” He gave a shrug, “Well darling, don’t we all want to project the best version of ourselves?” Krennic joined you on the bed, settling himself between your thighs again, pulling your legs around him, “Now I’m going to prove the rest of them true, whilst also letting you in on some things you don’t know.”

You had every right to moan as loud as you did as he pushed into you, feeling completely filled right away. Definitely true - part of you felt you might be smirking very broadly into your coffee in the mornings from now on. Instead of covering your body Krennic stayed in that kneeling position with your legs crossed behind him, hands gripping your thighs and nails digging into your skin. You almost wanted his nails to leave marks, for there to be bruises that lingered for more than just a few days where he gripped you - just to prove it had really happened. If this is a dream please don’t ever let me wake up. He growled as you adjusted to each other, voice husky once more, “You’re so tight.” Your sigh came out a little choked with your breathing as - at first - he moved slow, hands gilding softly over your skin as he lay his palms flat. But he still had enough pressure on you; Krennic was still in control. Right now, being in control was the last thing you were thinking of.

Those slow movements of his were a facade, but they had you already moaning - body tingling as you got used to the feelings of Krennic being inside you. You wondered if you should be trying to be quiet? How many other senior officers had rooms around Krennic’s that could potentially hear this - did Krennic even care? What if they knew it was you though? You weren’t necessarily sure you wanted the reputation that might come with being Krennic’s bed mate, even if it really was only going to be tonight. As if he knew what you were thinking Krennic pushed into you a little harder, causing you to cry out a little louder than before - no point in holding back. “Let me hear you, Y/N. Let me hear those delicious little moans of yours. You can be as loud as you want here, I won’t tell anyone…” He smirked, “You might as well let yourself - because this is going to be the best orgasm of your life, or it’s going to be nothing. I don’t do half measures.” That seemed like an odd form of encouragement, but hot enough to get you mewling again. And he didn’t slow his pace. Instead Krennic dug his nails back into your skin, thrusting into you harder and rougher. You arched your back up, pushing your hips into his to take him deeper and deeper. Usually you weren’t so loud during sex, but with your eyes closed to the ecstasy of it all, each thrust received a moan that steadily grew louder and louder until you were pleading him: “Oh, Krennic… Oh please, more… Harder, Sir, please… please don’t stop…” This was clearly only urging him on as he found another notch in his pace. You might be one for thinking this was the best sex you’d ever had as you opened your eyes to focus on him once more; Krennic’s skin was starting to get that dewy look as sweat started to build, leaving his hair to look a darker shade of grey. And that lightning… oh, that lightning. Watching that storm behind him made the pleasure even more intense. The backdrop was stunning to an already flawless view - what more could you possibly ask for?

His sex was deliciously rough, and it was all you could do to watch his body, the way his muscles moved with each thrust, the tension running from his shoulders, down his arms, through his fingers and the little indents from his nails you could see in your skin. You almost wanted those fingers back inside you again too. Krennic growled as that thought led to you clenching around him: “What are you thinking about?” You looked to his face, obviously you were already flushed, but if it were possible to turn a deeper shade of red you were now. “...Please…” You voice wavered and you realised where this was all heading, “Please Krennic harder… Please I want to- I want to- let me cum for you.” That smirk was just plain dirty, and as he placed one hand under you to raise your hips a little more his next thrust found your sweet spot. You cried out even louder - hit with a shot of pleasure more intense than any you thought you’d ever felt. “Fuck-! Director-! Please!” He chuckled, “I have a first name, Y/N, you can use it.” Did he want you to use it? Did he ask everyone he took to bed to use it? You gasped again as white-hot heat shot through you head to toe and your legs locked around him, pulling him even deeper as you tipped your head back. And he knew as well as you did: “That’s a good girl, that’s my good girl.” Krennic continued to thrust into you until you had to squeeze your eyes shut, head tipped back you very nearly screamed his first name as your body shook and you came undone.

Your short, sharp pants didn’t really have any time to become afterglow, or some slow paced ‘love making’ for him to ride into his own high. Oh no, Krennic wasn’t finished with you yet - and although he lingered at a slower pace for a little - you could feel yourself building up again, heightened by the climax you had just felt. There was a mischievous glint in his eyes and you got the feeling that Krennic was not about to be termed a selfish lover. But a possessive one; your body was his, and he wasn’t finished with you yet. You cried out as he took that pace up again, you could feel him getting harder inside you, every little twitch as he continued those rough thrusts. “You ready for more?” You nodded weakly, moaning again, this would be the third time in one evening. Even if these two were in quick succession. “Yes what?” The commanding tone in his voice and the way he squeezed your thighs a little harder made you shake again, “Yes, Orson. Please… please, baby… I- I’m ready.” As you said his name this time Krennic pushed his body forward so that his hands rested above your shoulders, catching your lips in a harsh kiss. Your hands immediately shot to his arms, over those toned shoulders, and your fingers tangled in his hair. This time his kisses swallowed your moans, and the higher in pitch they got the more he knew you were ready to let go again. With him all over you like this, the scent of that cologne filled your senses. Krennic thrusted into you one last time and let you cry out into his shoulder. He could probably go a little longer - but he’d build you up to that in due time, he couldn’t ruin you on your first time with him. As you clenched around him, just as greedily as before, Krennic growled - hot breath in your ear as your own ecstasy became his. And now you were his too.

He let you continue to embrace him as you both panted, moving his own hands to gently caress your sides, your stomach and your thighs. Although the only sound was your breathing, and you could barely think of anything else, hands carding through his hair and watching those beautiful blue eyes focus on nothing in particular. Until the lighting strike flashed closer to you than before, causing him to look out the window. You followed his line of sight. “It really is gorgeous…” You weren’t sure if that muse was supposed to come out of Krennic’s mouth, but it made you smile. “Mhm… And I need to have sex in storms more often.” He chuckled, turning back to you and kissing your neck, softly, “Well, you know who to call.” Krennic pulled out of you gently, smirking again to see yours and his arousal lingering on your inner thighs. His. Before he lay next to you, eyes still on the storm.

You wondered what the best thing to do now was, as your high unwound. Ironically you didn’t think your body had been this relaxed in a while either. Should you leave? Should you make the decision to leave him before he kicked you out himself? You wondered if that was the polite thing to do. You didn’t know if Krennic was the type to really sleep with someone. When he would be at his most vulnerable. You weren’t sure he would want to show that side of himself to anyone. You decided you would show willing, and would let him know that you would leave if that’s what Krennic wanted - you weren’t about to outstay your welcome. Instead, Krennic did the unexpected and, finally settling down in the sheets, he pulled you into his arms, showering you with delicate kisses and touches. Aftercare... You snuggled into his body, sighing in sleepy content and closed your eyes as he pulled the sheets further around you. Did you dare believe this was happening - No, and yet it was. You were really here, in the Director’s arms. And he wanted you to stay. Krennic pressed a kiss to your forehead, and you could already feel yourself drifting off in his arms: “We’ll review your report in the morning.” *** When you awoke, the lights in his room were up to their brightest day setting. Krennic’s free hand was wandering over your thighs absentmindedly as he lay on his back, your datapad in his other. You tried to concentrate on that small smile on his face, those blue eyes of his, just how good he looked comfortable and relaxed, and out of uniform. You hadn’t noticed the collection of freckles across his chest in the dark of the storm last night either. Suddenly you wanted this moment to last forever, no matter now impossible. This coupled with the travel of his hands, even at this time in the morning, was making you sigh blissfully.

Krennic’s eyes flicked from what he was reviewing to your face as he turned his head slowly. “This report is good. Perfect, even. The ion storm messed with some systems last night, that can’t be helped. But we should all be back online to work later. I agree with your data, consider it reviewed.” Your head tipped curiously. “Systems are down? So…” You bit your lip wickedly, “We don’t have to leave?” Krennic placed your datapad on his bedside table and rolled over, hand moving to between your thighs, he could read that mischievous little smirk of yours perfectly. “Not until much later if I have anything to say about it.” You blinked once slowly, opting to voice your single concern now, before anything got out of hand, it was a whisper that seemed so out of place. But maybe that made it the perfect time. “I don’t want to be just a one-time thing.” Krennic’s eyebrows knitted for a second, before he smiled gently, other hand moving to your face, caressing your cheek with his thumb before he tangled his fingers in your hair, bringing you back to his lips. “Trust me, that was never a consideration.”

---

Thank you SO much for reading, oh my gosh I’m slightly emotional over this one. I NEVER thought it’d be this long. And it’s 200. Like... there’s 200 of these things!?

I didn’t think I would get past one. And it’s ALL because of you guys!

Thank you for all your love and support - I know I keep saying it but I truly mean it. It means the world to me. 💙💜

#200!#Orson Krennic #Ben Mendelsohn #Orson Krennic x Reader #So. FYI for everyone the original request notes end at his 'come to my quarters we have data to review' and I just... didn't stop!#Sorry I was unable to resist this and I REALLY wanted it.#For any questions on the GIF just look at his face and tell me that /isn't/ how he's looking at reader throughout this fic #That's why I picked it.#Krennic x Reader #Director Krennic x Reader #Officer Benja Vy #I had to do waaaay too much scrolling to find that-! Hahah - our conversations!#Okay so in all the fics I've written for him Lorena is the only one(s) that get smutty. So this is ALSO your first Krennic/Reader smut!!#Linzi Writes #Linzi Writes Requests #Rogue One #Rogue One A Star Wars Story #That... /and he had Grace Too/ line #You either cackled like I did or you groaned #it was a final edit addition at like 10pm on the night of posting #Don't hate me I thought it was clever-!

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