#heres the thing i went to the dentist for the first time in my life just like. three weeks ago

[bruciemilf]

Hey guys guess who has an infected tooth and is DYING of pain lmao

[cherry-pop-elf]

New Chapter

Anya x Reader

Can be read as platonic because we all want the best for her

SUM: Anya gets an abortion so you and the rest of the crew wait for her. You were the first one, however, to see her after surgery. Also because fuck you, abortion rights

Warnings: Abortion, sexual assault, jimmy, medical situations, abortion rights, domestic happy family

“How long is it gonna take?” Daisuke asked, as he was worried but also excited. Excited for Anya to feel better. Worried for well….Not like he’s had the best reactions to medical situations. Example A being Curly in the wheelchair next to him.

Curly was doing so much better now that he was actually on the planet again. The doctors were still jaw dropped that Anya was able to keep him alive with so little. Was not only a testimony to how she refused for him to die, but him refusing to leave his crew behind as well. It’s still a long journey ahead, but he was in clean bandages and clothes at least. Was even able to talk again. Sorta. Rather raspy but he will get there.

Jeez where to start on how you all got here to begin with.

“She’s going to be fine. Abortion is way less invasive than you think. It really depends on how far along, but luckily she isn’t too far for it to be to extreme. Not sure what type she went for, but whatever she chose she chooses. Just grateful we were able to return home before she reached to far along.” You would admit, as you would check up on Curly’s IV bag for him. Taking over Anya’s roll until she could return.

“Ya know….My wife had an abortion.” Swansea said, and it made all of you look over to him in pure surprise.

“What’s the funny look for? Ya think I’m a freak that would refuse my wife that? She needed it! The kid just….It ain’t my place, but the kid just wasn’t gonna survive. Either she carried it to term and die with em, or she just skips the heart ache. Not like it was her fault. We got two healthy girls at the end of the day. We got em because she got rid of that fucked up one.” He explained, as Daisuke seemed wide eyed in respect.

Explains why he snapped more clearly.

Anya had explained to Swansea what had happened, and before you pre Daisuke knew it Jimmy’s head was sliced off and rolling across the kitchen floor. Poor Suke threw up all over you from the sight, and shock. Then threw up again when he learned why he did such a thing. Lots of puking and crying. Fitting.

“Glad that damn company is dead. Whose wise idea was it to have a single woman surrounded by men. No offense you two-“ Curly would wheeze, before you would help him take his medication. Sure is easier to take pills when you actually give him water and take it slow. No choking or crying.

“Thats a can of worms I don’t want us to talk about.” Swansea would scoff. As a father to two girls he had a lot of things to say. Daisuke would be willing to listen, sure, but honestly you all had enough emotional fatigue to last multiple life times.

Thank god Curly was so high up on the food chain at the company. They knew they would get into more hot water if their, once, top captain suddenly vanished. Wouldn’t make their bankruptcy any smoother. For once they did the right thing and sent Simeon to save them.

Funny. A capitalist corporate organization took responsibility for their actions. For the right reasons? No. But they still took it. Strange. Isn’t it?

“Is she done yet?” Daisuke would whine, as you laughed at his childish nature. As if waiting on a sister to get out of the dentists office. You found it rather endearing honestly. That despite it all he was still having a heart full of love and excitement.

“Go play on your toy.” Swansea would grumble, as Suke whined. Regardless he would pull out his game boy. A nice excuse to play video games with out any guilt on wasting his time. Enjoying life shouldn’t be a burden.

“Need anything, Curly?” You would ask him, since you planned on going to the bathroom. Yeah Swansea and Daisuke could handle him, but you still wanted to be polite. Maybe you could grab him something from the vending machines. Maybe a soda. Some sugar in his system would do him good. Anya said that sugary bubble water of some kind, like sprite, can help quite a lot with indigestion.

“I should be fine. Thank you for asking though. Sorry you have to…” He would admit, as he looked himself over. His missing limbs now properly covered up with fabric to keep them clean, and allow him some kind of independence. The fabric on the stumps were padded. With enough practice and effort he would certainly be able to roll himself around.

Then again this was a world of space travel. He was going to get cyborged eventually, but you need to be healed first before such an intense operation. Can’t rush something like this.

“Hey. I do it because I can. Not because I have to. You are our captain. Let me be a good solider.” You teased him, and even in his broken face you could see a smile.

Swansea have you a head nod to indicate he would ‘take care of the boys’ and you were off to use the restroom.

Once done with that you would grab a soda from the vending machine for Curly, a bag of candy for Daisuke, and some pretzels for Swansea. As you were making your way back a nurse would motion you over.

“Miss Anya was asking for you. She has finished her operation, and wanted you to see her.”

You were surprised at that. You expected Curly to be her first guest. Did something go wrong? Oh you couldn’t help but freak out.

You followed after the nurse quickly, and all you were shown was Anya resting in her hospital bed. Tired, but relieved. Mostly. You saw that familiar stress in her eyes. That same stress she had when asking you if she made the right choice in asking Jimmy for help with medicating Curly.

That worry of if I did the right thing.

The nurse would leave you to alone, and you would quickly set the snacks aside. Now you were sitting next to her, in a chair, and holding her hand. Ready to be the shoulder she needed.

“Hey there Doc. How you doing?” You asked her, as you carefully stroked the back of her hand. Made sure to be mindful of all the tubes and wires.

“Well….It went far smoother than I expected. It was just so quick. They didn’t even need to put me under. The IV is more so for the issues I already had because of being stranded on the ship for so long. It was just so quick. So painless. Was just like pulling a thorn out of an arm. It was….Simple.” She would try and explain to you. Needing to make sure to stop herself before using doctor jargon.

“Too easy?” You puzzled.

“Yes. It was just….I expected pain. Pain and anxiety and horror. Suppose even a nurse can come to learn a thing or two…..”

She was hiding something, and you had an educated guess on what.

“You expected Jimmy to break down the door. Weren’t you?”

There was silence, but it told you everything.

“Scoot over. Move it sister-“ You were now crawling into the medical bed with her, moving the wires around, and soon snuggled into her side. Hugging her close, and especially with your arm over her stomach.

“You did the right thing. It’s your body at the end of it all. You took responsibility of taking care of yourself. You wouldn’t have been able to live a proper life. You went to med school. You don’t need me to tell you the horrors of pregnancy and birth. That alone is terrifying. But also you simply not wanting to be pregnant is enough. Ain’t no Jimmy’s gonna storm in and say otherwise.” You huffed, as she smiled. Her head leaning into yours.

“Yeah….No more Jimmy’s. Pretty sure Swansea will make sure of that.” She did her best to joke, and you were proud of her for it. This whole ordeal was hell. Hell none of you will ever truly walk away from. But that’s ok. You all had each other to lean on.

“I think I’m ready for everyone now.” Anya would whisper, as you gave her hand a squeeze. You were so proud of her. This was all such a nightmare, but she’s taking it in stride.

“Hell yeah.” You agreed, before climbing out of the bed. You made sure to grab the snacks, and exited the hospital room.

“Come on guys-! Anya is waiting on you-!” You shameless shouted outside of the room. She couldn’t help her face palm. Daisuke sure was an influence on you.

“I wanna push Curly!”

“Like hell you are-!”

They would bicker away, before Curly said ‘fuck it’ and did his best to roll himself over. He sure was a stubborn one. Made it half way before you figured that was enough work out for one person.

“Pretty far! Getting better at it-!” You encouraged, as the two men realized how far Curly rolled off on before finally following you two into Anya’s room.

“HAPPY NO BIRTH-DAY!” Daisuke would cheer, as Anya shook her head at such a joke.

“God dammit kid-“ Swansea side, before he came over to Anya. Giving her head a kiss. Just comforting her much like a father would.

“How many of us need to be in medical beds?” Curly would give a raspy snort, as Anya reached her hand out. He would lean his head over, and she would give it a stroke. As if all his hair never burned off. A means of holding his hand, in a way, compared to just grasping a limb.

She didn’t need children.

She had all of you.

What else could a woman want?

Since you were willing to read through this story to the end, and get a nice in depth look on the importance of such why not donate to some organizations? : D

Planned Parenthood

Nation Network For Abortion Funds

National Abortion Federation

The Bridge Alliance

The Satanic Temple

ActBlue

No worry on donating. Spreading awareness and signing petitions still help! The more people learn and understand the better! Could also like reblog with other organizations or petitions!

Abortion is healthcare!

[gothamite-rambler]

Dentists seem to be their one weakness

Yes, this is based of Tori and Trina when Trina got her wisdom teeth removed.

Cass, Tim, and Stephanie entered the department store, but Cass quickly glanced at her phone and noticed that a couple of people were missing.

Cass: Where are Dick and Jason?

Tim: Um, I guess they didn’t tell you. Jason had all his wisdom teeth removed, and Dick guessed the wrong number, so he’s taking care of him.

Stephanie (alarmed): He got… all his wisdom teeth removed?

Tim: Yep. The crazy thing about the Lazarus Pit is that the liquid grew his wisdom teeth back, even though Bruce paid to have them removed before Jason died. Apparently, the dentist convinced Bruce it was best to take them all out because of the damage already done to Jason's mouth when he went last week.

Stephanie: Why would they even tell Bruce—he's covering the payment for the removal?

Tim nodded, chuckling.

Stephanie (snarky): Let me guess, Bruce dipped for an important vacation or mission?

Tim (feigning shock): Oh my God, how did you guess? He even brought Selina along to 'keep him company.'

Stephanie (shaking her head with a smile): All to avoid dealing with loopy Jason. Poor, poor Richard.

Cass: Why wouldn’t Bruce want to take care of Jason?

Stephanie snorted in laughter, waving her hand for Tim to explain.

Tim: Who do you think came up with this system? He’ll provide a ride home—that’s it.

Stephanie: It’s deceiving as heck, but I admire it.

Tim rolled his eyes.

Tim: You would.

Cass (doubtful): Jason has been through worse pain; he can’t be that bad.

Tim and Stephanie exchanged a knowing glance, then resumed their shopping without discussing the matter further.

---------------------------------------

Meanwhile, at Dick's apartment, Jason sat on the couch, arms crossed, in pain from the novocaine wearing off, refusing to open his mouth for his medication.

Dick (holding out a purple pill): Take the pill.

Jason (with gauze in his mouth): No.

Dick (for the tenth time): I need you to take the pill.

Jason (muffled): Nuh-uh, they taste nasty!

Dick: We’ve been at this for thirty minutes!

Jason’s eyes darted toward the door, searching for an escape. In a sudden burst of energy, he elbowed his brother in the stomach. Dick fell to the ground but managed to grab Jason's leg before he could escape, knocking him down as well.

Dick (angry): You’re going to take this fucking pill—

Jason punched Dick in the cheek, sending him backward. In retaliation, Dick kicked Jason in the stomach.

Dick: We’re doing this the hard way, got it?

Dick grabbed his brother’s leg again and dragged him back. The brothers started grappling as Dick tried to pry open Jason’s mouth.

Jason (whining): I don’t want the pill!

Dick (shouting): You need it, or you’ll get an infection!

Jason flipped Dick across the coffee table, causing the irritated, tired man to growl in frustration.

Dick (enraged): I will break every bone in your body until you take this pill!

Jason: Catch me first!

Jason ran across the apartment as Dick chased after him. Hayley the dog and Austen the cat watched from a distance, amused by their antics.

Dick (pinning his brother): Take the pill! I don’t care what you say!

Jason: No, I don’t want it! They taste awful!

Dick: I’ve been dealing with this for five hours! Take it! Take it now!

With a final surge of determination, Dick held Jason down, pried his mouth open, and forced the pill down his throat. Jason screamed but eventually swallowed the pill, whining as he shoved Dick off him. Dick collapsed onto the floor, grumbling.

Jason rubbed his sore mouth, cursing the fact that his wisdom teeth had regrown since he’d been brought back to life. Dick calmly stood up, grabbed a glass of water, and lifted Jason by the shirt collar.

Dick: Here’s your water!

He tossed the liquid into Jason’s face, then dropped him back to the ground.

Jason: When my mouth is healed, I will break your arm, your leg, and all your teeth!

Dick: Awesome, I’m just going to lay down. Stupid number-guessing game!

[chaotic-starlight24]

Sodapop Curtis General Headcanons

Well y'all, here he is. Our pretty little boy. I love Soda so much though, I linger a bit on the sad stuff though :( I'll be covering Two-Bit next!

Freetime Headcanons

Warnings: Spoilers and Some angst

There was one book that he managed to read and actually enjoy, and that was The Phantom Tollbooth. He read it in middle school and his parents were very proud of him for finishing it AND not forcing him to read it. (He was probably forced by a teacher)

He pulls out snacks and drinks from EVERYWHERE. Like he has legit just been talking to Pony on the couch and pull a Pepsi-Cola from between the cushions.

I mentioned in my freetime post that he is really good at doing hair. So sometimes he helps out Two-Bit and his mom by doing Dolly’s (Two-Bit’s sister) hair. She always likes when he does it because if her brother does it she usually ends up with 2 crooked ponytails.

When they grow up, he and Steve plan to own a car shop together. Soda would also like to start a horse-riding club for rodeos and everything. As I mentioned in my Steve headcanons, Johnny and Steve did a design for fun of the future car shop but Soda and Steve do end up using it (with a couple tweaks). 

Is Soda innocent and sweet at all times? NO. He is not shy when it comes to flirting with people. But he is also very respectful of women whenever they come to the car shop. He only flirts if they try to flirt with him first. Only if they’re the same age as him ofc. But one time Steve had to take over because an older woman was making some really weird comments to him. 

He was the first one to make friends with Dally in the gang. Him and Steve were hanging out and they managed to get Two-Bit to come with them because Mrs. Curtis didn’t like the idea of them walking around alone. So they walked over to the diner to see if they could get a free drink or something and Soda looked over and saw him. This scruffy looking 13 year old, crouched at the end of the bar thing. Soda is the most golden retriever person ever so he immediately went to try and talk to him. Dally tried to push him away but soon enough he was dragged into their little group.

He can get very self-conscious since he is supposed to be the “pretty” brother and will occasionally be found by Steve, just looking in the mirror. He doesn’t really have dysmorphia of any kind and is actually quite confident but he still has those moments.

Soda was not shy at all when it came to pulling his teeth as a kid. It’s just a bit loose? He yanks it out because it's annoying. One time the dentist told him to expect a specific tooth to be loose and he just pulled it out right then and there. (ONE OF MY FRIENDS ACTUALLY DID THIS)

He is one of the most talented of the gang with gymnastics. His favorite trick to show off with is front-flipping into a handstand and spinning on one hand. Can this actually be done? Idk. Would it look sick? Oh yeah it would.

He has the most amazing and cute laugh ever. He looks majestic, sounds beautiful, just top-tier enjoyable laugh. He throws his head back a bit and has the most adorable crooked grin.

Now for a bit of angst >:) After Sandy he was a lot more sensitive when it came to flirting or mentions of romance. He really thought Sandy was the one. Soda does not get angry easily but after Sandy, that was the first time Steve saw him snap at a stranger. Some girls really wouldn’t leave him be and he went off on them.

After his main breakdown when Darry and Pony came after him, he was happy they came. Happy they helped him back up and heard him out. But a small part of him wish Pony wasn’t so dang fast and Darry wasn’t so dang strong. He wanted to just keep running. Run until he found Sandy. Run until he made it so far from Tulsa that no one knew what a greaser was. He knew a hug and some tears weren’t going to stop the fights between Pony and Darry.

He gets colds really easily but he can’t get cough syrup down his throat for his life. It doesn’t help that Darry has this really nasty stuff that tastes like honey and rotten eggs and is like 20 years old.

He has freckles. That’s all. They’re beautiful.

He is one of the few to actually take Two-Bit’s love of Mickey/Disney seriously. Two-Bit has even dragged him to a couple movies. His favorite one was Mary Poppins. He has attempted to dance like Bert does.

He is the most physically affectionate out of everyone in all of Oklahoma. The more friendly he is with you, the more he’s affectionate. When he and Steve are sitting together he just drapes himself across Steve while talking. When he listens to Pony he’s usually holding Pony or hugging him. If he’s dating someone, he’s kissing their face and holding their hand all the time. He’s just more comforted by it. Mr. Curtis was the same way. Just a little less.

A couple months before he dropped out some Socs stopped him in the hallways. They were trying to steal the pocket money he had. He tried his best to hold them off him but one of them started getting physical. Until one mentioned his big older brother and that they should be careful. But the main soc told him that Soda was too dumb to ever think about telling him, or anyone for that matter. Not a thing going on in that pretty little head of his. Eventually they did end up leaving him alone. But those words stuck with Soda. Dumb. That was the word that came up in his mind first when thinking about himself. He wasn’t much more, was he?

As mentioned in my Johnny headcanons, he was one of Johnny’s first friends. He was one of the few to hear all about Johnny’s thoughts. He just had that way of making people talk to him. He heard all about how worthless Johnny thought he was. How little confidence he had. He tried his best in encouragement but he knew Johnny wasn’t going to listen. Which made it all the worse once Johnny died. He toughed it out when around the gang but one day after his work, he walked to the graves. He kneeled in front of Johnny’s. And sobbed. The boy who died feeling worthless, in agonizing pain. His friend. One of his first. And now he was 6 feet under. Nothing would bring him back. And next to him? The other friend he brought into the gang. He never really understood Dally all that well, but that was one of his friends. Now both would never meet him again. No more giving Johnny a sandwich at the DX cause he had nothing better to do. No more dragging Dally away from Buck’s to go to rodeos with him and Steve. No more gang hangouts with them all together playing games.

When Pony came home and then Johnny and Dally died, Soda felt horrible for his little brother. He had to watch him become much more closed off and defensive. He could barely get Pony to open up to him. He was terrified Pony would never have a good friend again. Eventually Pony got a couple of friends (As mentioned in my Pony headcanons, he and Esther became better friends) and Soda felt a little more at peace.

With the whole Vietnam war thing… I do think he would end up going, BUT end up surviving. We can’t have Pony lose everything ok! He was put on the less violent jobs and not thrown head-first into battle. Let’s just say he was allowed to go home after 2 years at most. That is all I will cover on that subject.

He’s a pretty good singer and he and Darry jam out to Elvis all the time. He really does sing his heart out. If Blue Suede Shoes comes on you know he has a comb in hand and tries to dance like Elvis. He also loves “Please, Mr. Postman” and if he’s feeling dramatic “It’s My Party”.

He doesn’t really listen to his own emotions much or tell anyone about them. He feels he’s supposed to be the listener. Everyone’s going through so much more than him! So he needs to be there for them, not himself! The only person he’s been vulnerable around is Sandy. Steve as well. Which meant it hurt so much more when Sandy left him.

The Curtis Brothers have an elderly neighbor named Nellie, she's 92. Soda brings cake to her once a week and just sits and chats with her. She brings them berry jam.

[miniwheat77]

High School Sweetheart. (Ghost x Reader.)

!CW! Make a dentist appointment, this shit is so sweet you’ll get a cavity.

Summary: Ghost and reader are high school sweethearts who cross paths again.

This was a request, you can find the ask here.

Every day it felt like he was just going through the motions.

Wake up, do what Captain Price asks him to do, go to bed. Sometimes there’s an occasional mission in there. Other than that, that’s all he does. Ghost wonders how the hell he ended up here sometimes. It doesn’t take long for him to remember. He’s lived a shitty life up to this point, and if he’s not killing terrorists, he feels worthless. “We’re welcoming a new recruit, meet outside.” He hears everyone announcing it to each other, everyone filing out the metal exit door. He creeps up behind everyone else, standing in the back.

“Everyone, this is Y/N.” Captain Price announces. He freezes up upon hearing your name. You give a small wave and he recognizes you immediately. What were you doing here? You greet everyone, talking and joking with them. Soap is making small talk with Ghost until you approach. “Hi, I’m Johnny but you can call me Soap.” He reaches his hand out. “This is Ghost.” He nods to Simon. You give him a look of confusion. “What is your first name?” You ask. “Simon. Simon Riley. Long time no see.” He puts his hand out, and you smile. Pulling him into a hug instead. This takes Johnny off guard. He knows Ghost isn’t a hugger. “How d’ya know each other?” Soap asks. “We went to high school together. Used to date.” You laugh. “High school sweethearts ah? Small world.” Soap laughs.

—

Ghost wasn’t sure how you ended up here. Last time he checked, you were off to work in the medical field and he joined the military. Ghost is the one who broke things off, he knew he couldn’t keep you happy and stay in the military. He never thought he’d ever see you again, especially not like this. “Why don’t you talk to her? I see you staring at her all the time.” Gaz nudges him. Ghost shakes his head. “Not my girl anymore.” Soap chuckles. “That’s gotta sting right? She’s smokin hot.”

“Depends on who broke up with who.” Gaz laughs. Ghost rolls his eyes. “You two are annoying.” Standing up and getting rid of his unfinished meal. He was growing more annoyed by the day. He wishes you hadn’t said anything.

He had to admit, you were pretty skilled. Something he didn’t expect. He wanted to talk to you, he did. But he didn’t know what terms you stood on exactly, so he left it alone. He makes his way into the gym, finding you. You’re taking deep breaths, lifting up the weight you’re holding on the bench press. Ghost decides there’s no better time to approach. “Shouldn’t do it without a spotter.” He mumbles, standing behind you. “Yeah? Maybe I wanted to go out on my own terms.” You smirk, taking another deep breath, arms beginning to shake slightly. He rolls his arms. Crossing his arms. “You know you’re a lot- different than you used to be.” You groan. “Yeah, happens when you get old. You’re different too.” He laughs. “How did you end up in the military anyways?” He asks. “I was a paramedic for a while, switched to an ER Medical Assistant.” You put the weight back up on the rack, taking in a deep breath and sitting up. “Seen a lot of traumatic shit, couldn’t handle it.” He looks at you, confused. “So the military sounded like a better choice?” He asks. “No, I tried to switch to normal jobs. Tried being a cashier, receptionist, vet tech. Hated it all. I had a lot of pent up anger, had no outlet. Talked to a counselor, tried doing other jobs. So I started doing medical in the military. Hated that too, so I just switched to infantry. I see a lot of traumatic shit, but at the end of the night I don’t go home alone. It gives me an outlet.” You shrug. He nods his head. “What did you see that fucked you up so bad?” He asks, following you around through your work out. “There was a few things.” You shrug. “My first day, I had to do an STD draw on a 5 year old girl. Her mom left her in a crack house for a few days, had no idea what happened to her.”

“Maybe she got a hold of a dirty needle.” You shook your head. “No. I tried to explain it away, but you would’ve had to see the way she screamed when the male doctors got too close. I wanted to rip her moms fucking head off when I seen her.” You breathe. He nods his head. “I understand. What else?” He asks. You swallow hard. “Little girl was brought in. Had a brain aneurysm.” You breathe. Your voice was getting unsteady. “She was dead before she got there, but the doctor wanted us to do CPR for the moms sake. I did CPR on her until my whole body hurt, until I couldn’t handle anymore, and than some. That’s not what bothered me though.” He looks at you, look of confusion again. “It’s the way her mom screamed when the doctor told her she didn’t make it. Still haunts me to this day.” Ghost sighs. “Jesus Christ.” He mumbles. “I’m sorry.” You nod your head. “I’m fine. I mean I’m not but I have to be. Life is short, I just like to stay busy.” He nods his head. “What about you LT?” You smile, standing up. “What made you stay?” You ask. He shrugs. “I guess I like to stay busy too.” He shrugs.

—

“She likes to stay busy? She’s flirting with you, you idiot.” Gaz rolls his eyes. “What? No she wasn’t. She had just got done telling me some really traumatic shit. The hell is wrong with you.” Ghost rolls his eyes. “I’m telling you, if you’re as smart as I pray to god you are, you will get her back, and put that tight ass on lockdown before I do.” Gaz raises his eyebrows. Ghost rolls his eyes once again. “Another meal ruined again.” Ghost rolls his eyes. He decides to go off and find you, not finding you in the gym like he usually would, so he assumes you’re on watch. He’s correct. He makes his way up the watch tower, seeing you sitting at the top inside. “Hey.” He walks in. “Hey. Johnny is supposed to take over for me but not for another hour or so. What’s going on?” You ask. He shrugs, sitting down next to you. “Staying busy.” He’s short. “Ghost huh?” You smile. He nods his head. “You tell them how you got that nickname yet?” You smirk. Even behind the mask you can tell that he’s smiling. “Nah. Not yet. I won’t hear the end of it.” Simon hates this. You knew Simon. You always brought Simon out. Made him smile, made his stomach swirl. “Why’s that?” You ask. “They keep teasing me about letting a girl like you get away.” He laughs. “Ah, everybody makes mistakes. It’s fine that yours was me.” You smirk. He rolls his eyes. “Don’t get too big of a head over there.” You laugh, just like he remembers.

“You’re huge now.” You smile. “Huh?” He laughs. “You were built in high school, sure. But nothing like you are now.” You laugh. “Is… that a good thing?” He asks. “Yeah it’s pretty hot.” He looks up at you, eyebrows raised. “Thanks I guess.”

“Even tough women like to be manhandled, Ghost.” You chuckle. “Remember that for your next girlfriend.” He can sense the jealously in your voice. He slides his phone from his pocket, opening up his text messages. He opens his text chat with Soap, writing out a text.

“Don’t worry about taking over watch, I’m taking over for Y/N.”

“ ;) ”

“Fuck off, MacTavish.”

“ ;))))) ”

He rolls his eyes, sliding his phone in his pocket. “Sound a little jealous to me.” He smirks. You roll your eyes. “Me? Jealous? Really?” You smirk. He nods his head. “Yeah.” You laugh. “You’re ridiculous.” You laugh. “And you’re a liar.” He chuckles.

When the silence takes over once again, he thinks about it for a minute. “I’m sorry.” He mumbles. “For what?” You ask, looking up at him. “For leaving you alone. Making you go through all of that shit alone.” He sighs. You laugh. “I went a little crazy. If we were together you would’ve hated me.” You laugh. “Still, I feel bad.” You smile. “Well. We can always be friends. No sense in regretting something you can’t change.” You shrug. He nods. “Yeah. You know I think you’re a strong girl right?” He laughs. “I think you’re a strong guy too Simon. You don’t give yourself enough credit.” He rolls his eyes, thankful for the balaclava covering his face. His cheeks are too pink to look natural without it. “I’m serious. You did the best you could with the shitty hand you were dealt, and the fact that you’re still doing so good makes me so fucking proud of you.”

Somewhere deep down, passed the barrier he’d put up, those words sting him right to his core. Reopening old wounds he didn’t know he had. “Thank you. I’m proud of you too.” You smile. He can see the pain in your eyes. He knows he’s hurt you. He just hopes somewhere deep down, you’ll be able to forgive him.

—

Ghost doesn’t always take the time to realize exactly how lucky he is. His eyes scan the table, his captain, Gaz, Soap. They’re all sitting around him laughing at something Soap has said, eating their dinner. It’s the closest thing Simon has ever had to a family, and with you back. You flipped his world upside down. He’s in his head too much anymore, thinking. He’s so guarded, but somehow these kind people gravitate toward him. He just hopes if anyone has to die, he does first. He doesn’t want to suffer anymore.

He’s staring off into space, thinking about you. How you were together when you were younger. He thinks about the first time you had together. First kiss, first time. How nervous he was hovering above you, trying to keep you calm and reassure you. How much you trusted him. He always thinks about how calm he was when you were around. After fighting with his asshole dad, anytime he was stressed out and ready to give up, you were always there. Helping him back onto his feet. The times he couldn’t, you’d sit there. Right at rock bottom with him until he was ready to climb his way back out. You helped him every step of the way, and he left you alone. You did everything. Put your heart into his hands. And he shattered it. Stomped on it until it was nothing but fine grained glass. A powder. And you still picked it up. And placed it right back into his cold hands. Just so that he could throw it in your face and walk away.

He needs to stop before he gets upset. Instead, choosing to think about how beautiful you are. Back then, so carefree. He thinks about those summers you spent together, sun beating down on each other. Swimming together, being in love. Your smile. Your giggle when he said something dumb. He remembers how pretty you were, looking up at the moonlight with tears in your eyes because of something so dumb. A fight, a disagreement. He misses how simple everything was. He thinks about holding your hand, walking up and down the street before either of you could drive. He thinks about the stray kitten you had found and how much he tried to convince you not to take it home, but you did anyways. And he remembered how hard you cried when the cat got too sick to bring home from the vet. He held you close as you said your goodbyes.

He thinks about the time he first put on a skull balaclava and how you gave him the funniest look, narrowed eyes and a smile playing at your lips. “So mysterious. Your new nickname is Ghost.” You smile. And how he pounced you, pushing your back into the silk sheets, tickling you until you nearly cried, laughing so hard. How you pulled his mask up to kiss him, just like Mary Jane and Peter Parker.

He’s walking away from the table before he realizes his feet are taking him to your room. Carrying him even though his brain is somewhere else completely. He doesn’t even knock on your door, barges right in. Thankful you’re half dressed. He closes the door behind him, you look up at him in complete confusion as he closes the distance between the both of you. He’s pulling his mask off and ditching it somewhere in the room. “Simon? What are you do-“ his lips are on yours before you can even finish your sentence, holding onto the nape of your neck with both of his hands as he forces you back into the wall behind you. You melt right into him, and he’s so thankful you don’t push him away. You let him kiss you, body relaxing into his. When he finally pulls away, resting his forehead on yours, you’re panting. Taken off guard by him. “I love you. And I’ll understand if you don’t want to give me another chance. But I won’t fuck up again. I let you get away once, and I won’t again.” He breathes. A laugh leaves your lips, “Simon, I knew I was going to give you another chance the moment I see that fucking mask.” You giggle.

Maybe that stupid metaphor is right.

‘If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be.’

[ribboned-spinal-cord]

Barely three hours after the third episode aired and I already got into a tousle, tis' the tragedies of I.

TW For : Ribbun, Name Calling, an Abundance of Swearing, mentions of Parents, Small Spoilers for Episode 3 of TADC

Disclaimer !! Before I show these screenshots, I just wanted to make it clear, they're censored for a reason !! I made this new blog for a reason !! I don't want any party involved in this situation to be found and harassed on the slim chance this post reaches an audience. I had highlighted my messages in red, excuse my clumsy censor work, my picture app didn't have an eraser.

Along with that, there were a few events that I did not get screenshots of at the time, but I will mention in this post, including my behavior and how I handled the situations end.

This entire thing started and ended in a Ribbun Discord Server owned and ran by a popular TADC fan creator on here who specializes in the aforementioned ship.

If you don't know, Ribbun is a ship between the characters Jax and Gangle of TADC, a favorite of mine and why I joined this server, invited by the person who I referred to in most of these screenshots.

This was about an hour after the third episode premiered and after rewatching it, I noticed a small dumb detail that I wanted to immediately yap to someone about. I just posted it in the general of this server and that was that.

This person didn't need to respond to my statement. They didn't even need to acknowledge me, and I would have been fine with that. Totally happy, I rarely spoke on that server anyways, but the way they approached it was so dismissive and hostile that it took me back, especially coming from someone I looked up to and before this, was actually super nice to me when they invited me to the server.

I didn't know that gooseworks had posted at all about any mistakes regarding the episode, so I wouldn't have noticed if anyone else knew about this fact, and maybe this person was tired of hearing about it or something. I've also been told that Crap isn't really a swear word, but I was raised to accept it as one.

I thought my response was clear and firm, especially compared to my other messages, where I aided in the snowballing effect to some degree. The way they responded made me feel uncomfortable at the best I can describe it. I think some people would call me triggered, if that's the right terminology?

I know they were being sarcastic in their apology, and I think my snarky response about "not forgiving them" only fueled the flames. I should have been using tone indicators this entire time to show that I was just trying to match the energy, but it seemed however I responded set them off, even if I ignored them entirely, they still tried to text me after I unfollowed and blocked them.

We went back and forth for a little bit, me being generally dismissive and giving half hearted replies as they continued to cuss me out, calling me things like "a little bitch" and threatening to knock my teeth in "so bad I'll have to go to the dentist" or something like that, but I'm probably misquoting them word for word. It only became worse after I made a "your mom" joke.

From what I can tell, the mention of their mom or any parental figure set them off, I don't know the details of why this is or what they were going through, so I apologized immediately after.

My screenshot cuts it off, but to summarize, I tried to sympathize and told them I didn't know what they were going through and genuinely didn't know anything about their home life or parents, and if I did, I wouldn't have mentioned them at all, especially in a joke like that. I probably mentioned this before, but I barely know this person, besides what they post here on Tumblr, but they were someone I looked up to and admired for their art, so it felt crushing that they acted this way so comfortably and without consequence.

Nobody besides someone in the first screenshot came to my defense, so most likely I'm in the wrong and just stupid with a closed perspective, or everyone was used to this behavior and accepted it as the norm. I suspect the latter, because later about five other people began to dog on me, and since they all had matching names, one could surmise that they were the friends of this individual. That, or parasocial fans.

I was going to leave the server because this person gave me two strikes??? (I didn't know there was a striking system in place and at the time I didn't know they owned the server, because yikes-), first one due to mentioning their mom, second because as soon as I begun to ignore them, they thought I was messing with them.

This is the part where I stopped taking screenshots, which I should have done, since it involves my nasty behavior and the peak of the story, so bear with me, you'll probably see screenshots if you know this person, or the messages if you were in the server yourself. Like I said, not naming the server or the participants involved. If any identities are leaked, it came from this person or their friends, and that goes to show they don't really care for anyone's safety.

I took these photos in the first place to send to a friend who I usually confided in about this sort of thing, because in the past I have been regarded as a push over and couldn't tell if someone's intentions were hostile, and they had an unbiased perspective in most things. After seeing the screenshots, my friend asked to join the server, which I obliged, completely forgetting that you could only be invited by a moderator or owner on that server, which was probably implemented due to people disliking ribbun to the point of harassing these types of creators, but that's my assumption and I don't want to speak for anyone.

I put my phone down for a second right after this, and when I came back, this friend had went off on the owner of the server, and I think maybe some other people that were backing her up. I didn't know my friend would act this way, but it was completely irresponsible of me to drag them into this, it wasn't my call to make, and it makes me feel terrible that something like that happened because of me. Even if I was being cussed out and harassed, that didn't give me the right to do the same, or to have my friend act in my name.

I panicked and denied inviting them, which is like, you know, not great and also I'd argue considerably worse than inviting them in the first place, until it was mentioned there was a log of everyone who has been invited to a discord server, and who invited them. I caved like a coward because I know when I get got. Before leaving, I did say some not amazing things about this person and their friends, critiquing their behavior, etc. While everyone clowned on me. I was surprised I wasn't kicked by anyone at this point, because that threat was going on for quite a bit, so I just left.

I feel a lot better knowing that although this all could have been avoided if I just ignored this person and left the server sooner, that something like this has happened before, and it will most likely happen again. I get so caught in my head I'm locked in a stasis, forgetting the obvious, that none of this matters and I'm talking to someone who lives a thousand miles away, on my little phone, in my little bedroom, in a house on an island on a planet in a galaxy in an infinitely expanding universe. Everything is simultaneously so small and so big at the same time, depending on perspective. This was stupid, that person was stupid, their lackies were stupid and I was stupid. It's very... overdramatic.

And that was that. Wanted to get it off of my chest and into the world. Toodles.

Edit :

I was just made aware that this person isn't the owner of the server, the owner messaged me and told me as such. In a later date, if this issue isn't resolved, I'll go through the post and edit it to make that clear. I thought since this person gave me two strikes within the span of 40 seconds and had a troupe egging them on, they must have held some sort of status.

[sgtmickeyslaughter]

WEEKLY TAG WEDNESDAY

Thank you for the tag babes! @spookygingerr @energievie @vintagelacerosette @takeyourpillsbitchh @burninface

---

name: Gigi

do you drink coffee? yes I love coffee so much, no sugar and ton of milk, if auras/souls were visible mine would glow the second im handed a cup of coffee

what’s the best thing you ate today? haven't eaten yet, but my morning coffee was gorgeous

tell us about your first pet (or if you haven’t had a pet yet, what’s your dream pet?) My parents had two brindle boxers when i was born, they were very sweet and protective of their little baby (me)

if your life was a book, what would you call the current chapter?

The scribble I feel like the scribble, I'm feeling pulled apart and turned around and more open to spontaneity than usual and leaning into it bc im turning 25 in two weeks and either im having a moment of reflection on life and it's seasons or the quarter life crisis is popping off. maybe both. probably both.

what’s something you did recently that you’re proud of?

i went to the dentist by myself for the first time, I had to get three cavities filled and I was very very scared and uncomfortable and taking the subway home with my mouth completely numb was weird and vulnerable but i did it!

what was your first dream job growing up? is it anything like the job you have now?

I wanted to be a writer and an artist, and I think architecture is in that general realm

what’s the name of the latest playlist you made?

I don't make playlists often but i made one a little while back and im still adding to it called Losing Dogs, which is the name of the fic i'm writing and it makes me :) unhinged :) heres the link

tagging:

@mickeym4ndy @jrooc @mmmichyyy @catgrassplantdad

@creepkinginc @heymrspatel @ian-galagher @mybrainismelted

@suzy-queued @thepupperino @lingy910y @blue-disco-lights

@milkovichrules @gallapiech @iansw0rld

[cesiousblue]

Hey I really hate to ask for help, but if you have anything to spare I would really appreciate the help. It's been catastrophe after catastrophe lately and me and my family are having a rough time. (Further explanation at the end of the post)

If you can't help, please reblog!

My ko-fi is at https://ko-fi.com/cesiousblue and I also have pay-what-you want phone backgrounds/a fun art practice guide, and commissions starting at 15 bucks.

Further explanation of the situation:

My whole life has been an ongoing catastrophe lately and I feel like i am really helpless. My dad's wife has brain damage/ is in the hospital and he's got low mobility and a roach infested house. They live like an eight hour drive away and we have no money so I'm having to take money from my transphobic brother to stay in a hotel, and I have four days there to try to solve like six months of problems without the resources to do so.

We're already in debt and i am deeply aware of just how much time I have to try to turn things around for myself, too. I need to find a new online job I can actually do but the rest of everything has been so overwhelming I haven't really had time or brains pace to do it.

Also I have been trying to get a dentist appointment at a place that will bill medi-cal because I ground my teeth so hard I cracked a molar.

(If several ppl weren't depending on me I think I'd just go crawl into a bog and never return)

A little update 3/16:

We're heading up to my dad's tomorrow and the new plan is to try to get him to come back down with us. He doesn't seem like he can live on his own. And until we can figure out how to get him help here it's just gonna be me and my mom taking care of him.

(The good news is I went to a different dentist and I guess the first one straight up lied to me and all I did was chip a tooth in the back. I'll need a filling but that's not as bad as I thought)

Donations/ comms/ shop purchases still definitely needed! If we CAN convince him to come with us, It'd be nice if we could get a bed or something here so I don't have to start sleeping on an air mattress

[overlordofships]

oooo what got u interested in hookfang and snotlout as a ship. im interested to know :0 (if u still ship them haha)

I VERY MUCH DO >:3

Okay so when I was a baby fandom lad and just getting into HTTYD I remember shipping all the riders with their dragons, but back then the fics for that was like. 99% toothcup, 1% toothcup feat. other ships. So I could NOT for the life of me find any other dragon/rider ship fics solely for, say, Fishlegs/Meatlug, and then by extension I just didn't have any fuel for my shipping

Nowadays I'm more competent in making my own fuel. But for shipping any dragon and rider in HTTYD that is not Toothcup you have to watch the series to understand, since the pairings that aren't them don't get a lot of attention in the movies proper (henceforth all of this will be under the cut for how long it is):

First off, I will be talking about canon shippable moments. In the first season, there's an episode where Hookfang has a toothache (it's the one where the forge changes into a dentist, because Gobber doesn't have any reason to make weapons anymore) (sorry I forget episode names). There's a part near the end where big, macho man Snotlout breaks down in TEARS pleading for Hiccup to stop Gobber, outright sobbing the words, "He's gonna kill my dragon!" I remember just rewatching that episode over and over to the point of pissing off my mom and her telling me to watch something else, because it was the BIGGEST piece of non-Toothcup food I'd gotten fed up to that point.

The second season had an episode of Snotlout working Hookfang to the bone, to where Hookfang's flame went out and he got deathly ill. Snotlout CRIED, genuinely cried AGAIN over this (and this time it got called out by Astrid) and when he thought the Fireworm Queen had killed him, he just looked fucking BROKEN, and he even said "You're more than just another sword" (which I think is/was a line in our very small hooklout shipping community used to emphasize their relationship - they see each other not just as weapons to an end, they're more to each other than their strength even if that's what originally drew them to each other as dragon and rider).

Next up - this episode is Netflix-only which is heartbreaking for all you who don't have it. But there's an episode in either the first or second season of Race to the Edge (can't remember) where not only does Snotlout think Hookfang is leaving him (and the twins play it as a fucking love triangle tragedy the whole time) but he straight-up tells Hiccup that if he can't ride Hookfang, he doesn't want to ride a dragon at all.

I reference all of these to say that there's just something special to me about two people (or one person and one dragon) who are normally cold, standoffish and outright cruel to other people, but become absolutely soft and vulnerable when it comes to each other. There's a difference there to me between that and how Hiccup is nice to everyone, but is just a special nice to Toothless. (I am still a very hard Toothcup shipper, don't get me wrong, but Hooklout at this point has firmly overtaken them as my OTP for HTTYD)

All of that said, because we unfortunately cannot see into Hookfang's mind beyond the obvious (he is a dragon and cannot talk - which is ofc a roadblock in one of my fics, but still) one of my favorite things to do is imagine the canon show but with my Shifter-verse, so here are some headcanons for anyone who wants them featuring Shifter!Hookfang and Snotlout:

Hookfang uses Monstrous Nightmare courtship, which involves either submitting himself to someone stronger or making himself seem tougher/stronger. All the times he hurts Snotlout are his unfortunate attempts at flirting. (Related: He also regularly, casually says, "If this goes wrong, I want Snotlout to kill me" and he also thinks that's flirting, too)

In my Shifter AU the episode with the Fireworm Queen turns out differently - he gets to that point because he thinks he's not enough for Snotlout. Maybe a snide comment from Spitelout got him there, or maybe something happened in a battle. Whatever it is, he does it himself - and then, later, when he's better, when Snotlout is all bawling and asking what the hell he was doing, Hookfang says, "I wanted to be good enough to be your dragon." and that would be big since in my Shifter-verse I think that wouldn't be something the dragons would say lightly

Related to number 1, whenever Snotlout does something really impressive strength or intelligence-wise, Hookfang just becomes this gooey, flirty, flustered mess. It's adorable to watch, but very confusing for poor Snotlout

The episode in Race to the Edge where Snotlout has to do all those trials to be Mala's king? Hookfang insists Snotlout do it because he will NOT stand for anyone implying his mate couldn't survive something (and Snotlout plans to turn Mala down afterward anyway)

Incidentally, Hookfang acts like Toothless is the most annoying dragon ever when he talks about Hiccup... But if you let him Hookfang could give rants twice as long and just as sappy, if not sappier

Somehow, despite that, Snotlout WOULD NOT GET IT. He teases the hell out of Hiccup and Toothless, but prior to Hookfang actually using real words to say to Snotlout that he's in love with him, Snotlout would have 0% understanding that Hookfang is into him (that's also a trope I love, btw: two people very-obviously smitten with each other but one of them has absolutely no idea)

Hookfang just casually leaning on/draping himself over Snotlout in his human form, a quiet way of saying to everyone around him "This is mine" (and when they get together Snotlout starts casually sitting in Hookfang's lap)

Related to the above: Remember when I said Hookfang would casually say "If this goes wrong, I want Snotlout to kill me"? After they get together, Snotlout starts returning that phrase with, "Not if you kill me first". All the dragons think it's cute but the humans are just like "....what-"

They're also the most fucking dramatic when they get together. Hookfang sweeps Snotlout into his arms, DIPS him and then presses a big kiss to his lips. Right in front of everyone else. (Compared to Hiccup and Toothless who went out to the cove to confess to each other, and Fishlegs and Meatlug who quietly got together without even noticing)

Basically, what got me into them is imagining these idiotic, self-confident, sappy, oblivious, simpy morons looking at each other and saying "That one" and then somehow taking years to realize their feelings are requited despite them each being the only one the other will truly be vulnerable for

now I leave you with this screencap from the end of the Fireworm Queen episode

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being apparently indifferent with my siblling?

For context, I (26) have a younger sibling (23). We have the type of relationship where either we get along really well, or we don't even talk. I love my sibling, but during our childhood and adolescence they were... well, a bully. which made me put quite some distance between us. They are becoming a better person now, but there are still some boundaries that I set that I'm not taking back.

Growing up, my father used to pamper us often. However (in my case) my mother was a strict parent, and there were times when she used to make me feel like a burden (I was dealing with depression and suicidal tendencies). This made me aspire to become independent and so I tried to do things on my own as much as possible. As a side effect, I started seeing things from a new perspective, I felt satisfied for allowing myself to learn new things, and I became more grateful for everything that others did for me.

However, my sibling's case was different; since they continued to be handed everything, they didn't ever have to struggle. And while that sounds cool, it seems to me that this didn't leave much room for growth. I believe this shouldn't really have to bother me that much, but we still live together, and they don't know how to take "no" for an answer, and now that we both are adults and have graduated, I can't help but to feel irritated by their attitude and behavior.

They are currently unemployed and they are not helping more with the chores at the house. This has been going on for some time now.

My sibling has depression, and so I'd tried to be supportive and do them favors. But one day I was very stressed; I had a lot going on in my mind, my sibling wanted to spend some time together but I told them I had a lot of work but that It Wasn't Personal. The next day, I was doing them a favor, but they bitched complained that I was "doing it wrong" (which I wasn't) and this pissed me off very much, since I could have refused to help them to begin with. I told them that I was giving them my time, that they were being ungrateful and that I didn't think it was fair that they talked to me that rudely, but they got even more upset.

Afterwards I went out to work and when I got back home I went straight to my bedroom for a quick nap. Few minutes later, they broke into my room and they started throwing me things I had in common spaces (which weren't being used by anyone). I usually take a step back whenever I'm hot headed in order to avoid saying nasty things during arguments, but in this ocassion things got out of hand and I even if I tried I couldn't ignore their provokations. I called them out for bad things they'd done in the past and that was the only way I could end the argument. Evidently this hurt them a lot, but I didn't want to or sought to argue in the first place. They threatened and emotionally blackmailed me with life and death situations (I'll spare y'all the many details), and I felt like this was a lost cause; it was not the first time those kind of threats were made.

The reason I'm wondering if I'm the asshole here is that it has been weeks since I decided not to engage in any interaction with them. To be honest it is more comfortable for me to simply mind my own business and not do them favors anymore (cooking and cleaning for them, taking them to appointments, therapy, dentist, vet, bank, etc, you get the idea) because they are not even grateful (they literally don't even say "thank you" nor do they do anything out of gratfeulness) and I am too emotionally drained to feel anything anymore. Having dealt with their tantrums and having been bullied by them in the past made distance actually feel safe and comfortable for me, and so I am not seeking to fix things currently even though I know they feel resentment towards me. Despite they being my sibling I just don't care that much.

AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[mortifying-macaroni]

I've loved your art and animations for a while, but just went on a liking spree—wheeee!! Here are my questions for Gretchen (I tried to limit them... I really tried 🥺): 14, 30, 34, 38, 48

Thank youuuu 💚

HIII!!! AAAA Your're literally so sweet I couldn't resist becoming moots with you! Your lovely comment on the Palla Grande dress made me joyfully squeal I swear! 🥹🖤 Thank you to the moon and beyond for the kind words! haha no sweat, I really like the questions you picked out!

14. How did they initially feel after being embraced? Did they like being reborn into something knew or did it take them a while to cope with their new reality?

Despite the whole rollercoaster during LaCroix's trial, she warmed up to her unlife momentarily! Being dissatisfied with how monotonous her previous life felt in the Big Apple (boring dentist job, the few friends she had drifting away in favor of starting a family,...- all a total yawn for her), this was exactly the kind of turnaround she needed, but the whole "errand girl" thing didn't sit well.

30. Do they have a clan that they do particularly like?

Honestly she's rather neutral towards the ones she encountered thus far. It's neither here nor there, even when it comes to her own clan. There isn't really one she can confidently point to and say "I'm putting you over the rest", but she's the type to judge a kindred as an individual rather than their bloodline.

34. What are their thoughts on blood dolls?

Gretchen feasts on others without consent, finding the chase more thrilling than the catch itself. To her, blood dolls are too easy and don't offer her the excitement she craves. Pouncing on unwilling prey is what fills her and the Beast with that needed kick.

38. Do they care about the taste of blood?

Not really. She's not picky. All blood is valid to her whether it's bland or potent.

48. Detail things about your OC you spent a lot of time on!

Ooooh interesting! I'd say it would be her personality. At first I thought of making her into a stuck-up academic who's stone cold, quiet and obsessed with books, but then I was like naaaah... After musing over it for a bit, she ended up being a chill, goth nerd who isn't afraid to go on a yapping marathon, even while talking to an Elder. She makes a habit of making witty/sarcastic remarks, sometimes in the most inappropriate of situations, which nearly got her in trouble many times back when she was starting out in the Sabbat.

[lucy4242564]

.cowboy like me.

Chapter 12

All these people think love’s for show, but I would die for you in secret

~family that I chose, now that I see your brother as my brother~

“You good Barbie? Ya didn’t shootcha self did’ya?”

“I’m okay,” she looked beside her as he passed through the bushes. “I think I shot a deer?”

“Ya either did or ya didn’t.”

Two months after Lilah’s attack, she was doing considerably better. The topic was still fresh to her so it was something she kept behind lock and key. Daryl was the only person besides herself that knew the entire story and she wanted to keep it that way. She already felt so stupid for nearly getting herself kidnapped. She didn’t need anyone else telling her.

 

In the distance she heard her name being called. It was raspy, thick, and southern. The mirror in front of her reflected the door opening behind her revealing the man behind the voice. “We still goin’?” Daryl asked.

 

“Yeah, sorry. I was just finishing my makeup, I’m coming.” Lilah assured, then turned to face him.

 

Daryl scanned over her body like he’d never seen her before. He always did.

 

It was June 24th; their anniversary.

 

It had been two years since they made things official, but the first time they were actually celebrating the date. They’d both forgotten the year prior and chalked it up to nothing. This time though, Daryl planned something. Actual dates were few and far between in their relationship. Sure they would go out to eat or to the movies sometimes, but nothing about it got too special.

 

This go around, Daryl gave her a dress code, a time, and had been bugging her about it the night before. It was out of character for him. Lilah wasn’t complaining though. After two years of being together, it was nice to still have little surprises.

 

 

“You said jeans would be fine!” Lilah couldn’t hold back a laugh when they walked under a sign going into Six Flags.

 

She’d told him before that she’d never been, but always wanted to go. Nothing ever presented a real reason to go though, so she never did.

 

“It’s you and them short shorts against the world ain’t it?”

 

“I wear dresses!” She defended. “But you specifically said jeans.”

 

“You’da wore a dress while ridin’ one of them things?” Daryl nodded towards the general direction of the rides.

 

She pouted her lips and mumbled under her breath, “I’ll wear a dress while riding you.”

 

“Whatcha say?” A sly grin on his face.

 

“Nothing.”

 

 

A knock on the front door had Lilah scrunching her eyebrows. She checked the stoves time to see that Daryl wasn’t home for at least another 20 minutes. Even then, he has a key.

 

Glancing down at the floor where Cam, Brittany’s son laid, and back at the door she stood up. Lilah was babysitting while Brittany went to the dentist. All summer long Lilah had been helping Brittany and Paul out with him. There had been no issues since she started, so another knock at the door had her peaking out the curtains.

 

Her heart sank when she saw a man standing in front of the door. He was a little less than 6 foot, heavier set, and balding. If she was quiet, he didn’t need to know anyone was there.

 

Still, she grabbed her gun from the counter.

 

“Boy, there’s a car outside, I know ya in there. It’s about’ya uncle.” His voiced sounded from behind the door.

 

Daryl had talked about his uncle before. He had fond memories of him; he’s the one that got him his first crossbow. Lilah didn’t know the guy though, and she had another life in here she needed to protect. She stayed put. After silence from the other end for a few minutes her body jumped when a tapping sound came from the bedroom. Whoever he was, was tapping on the window in there now.

 

Lilah could faintly hear the man talking but remained in the living room with Cam. About a minute later there was another knock on the front door. “Ya uncle’s had a huntin’ accident, I need’ya to come on.”

 

Now he was just pulling at her heartstrings.

 

If he tried anything, she’d pull the trigger, no exceptions.

 

She slowly unlocked the door before cracking it open. It was just enough that half of her body could be seen. Before she could respond to anything he’d said, he spoke. “Who’re you?”

 

Part of her wanted to laugh because, wasn’t he at her door; she should be the one asking that question. Instead her lips parted before answering. “Um, Daryl’s girlfriend, he’s not here right now. He’ll be home in about 10 or so minutes though.” She felt him eyeballing her in an almost suspicious manner. Did he think she was lying?

 

Not that she cared that much, she didn’t even know who he was. It just made her feel awkward as they stood there in silence for a little while longer. “I’m’is dad.” The man said while turning around. “I’ll wait for’em out here.”

 

His dad?

 

Lilah knew very little about Daryl’s father. Or mother for that matter. She knew he became abusive fairly early in Daryl’s childhood and had a serious alcohol problem. He was the one responsible for the marks along her lover’s back. The last time they’d spoken was apparently a little over 3 years ago. They’d gotten into it and Daryl walked out.

 

It made her feel bad that Daryl still looked for his fathers approval though. He still talked about their hunting trips and whenever he was brought up, Daryl defended what he did.

 

 

 

“How’s your uncle?” Lilah asked when Daryl slid into bed late that night.

 

“He’s fine. Was trackin’ the area for the upcomin’ season and busted his ass, accidentally stabbed himself. Pa needed help gettin’im out the woods.”

 

“I’m glad he’ll be okay.”

 

“Yeah,” Daryl bit the inside of his cheek. “He wants ta meet’ya. Pops wouldn’t stop askin’ boutcha.” If the room hadn’t been dark, Daryl would’ve seen Lilah’s cheeks turn pink. “Y’ain’t gotta though.”

 

Lilah considered what he was saying. She felt very negatively towards his father. Most of Daryl’s emotional issues stem from the abuse he endured through his childhood at the hands of that man. That, in her eyes, was unforgivable. But then, she couldn’t help noticing the hopeful tone of his voice.

 

“You let me know whenever you’re ready Dixon.”

 

 

 

“Sweet pea, I support you. I just-“ Steve Cabot, truth be told, was panicking on the other end of the line. “How long have you thought over it?”

 

“Since Spring Break dad. I really think being on scene is what I was meant to do.”

 

“Why don’t you just, just think a little longer. Law school is a big deal and you’re already almost three years in.”

 

“I mean,” Lilah wanted to go ahead and drop classes before they really started. “I think I’ll just, I can just wait until this semester ends and make my final decision then.”

 

“That would be a much better option. It’ll give you time to re-enroll and figure out exactly what it is you’d want to do anyways.”

 

 

 

When Lilah brought up her potential career change in the future, it got Daryl thinking of just that. The future.

 

He didn’t see a future without her. It was about to be their third holiday season together and he noticed the nervous looks she’d give him when the cheesy ring commercials would play. They’d spoke about marriage before, but only briefly. More of a passing comment about their future wedding and why he needed to grow his hair longer. Nothing else.

 

It wasn’t a bad idea to start looking, he just didn’t know what to be looking for. He didn’t even know where to really look. Lilah didn’t wear much jewelry. A black, pearl necklace was the one piece he was familiar with; anything else was just random trinkets that he hardly saw. Daryl was clueless.

 

“Don’t think yourself to death.” Lilah’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts.

 

Maybe he should bring it up now.

 

“L?” He questioned. She hummed in response, waiting to hear what was on his mind. Daryl could feel his hands become sweaty, he was thankful it was dark in their bedroom. At least she couldn’t see how nervous he was. “Marriage stuff, is that somethin’ you want soon? With me?”

 

Lilah almost stopped breathing entirely. Was he about to have that conversation with her? “I wouldn’t want it with anyone else.”

 

These things scared her and she wasn’t entirely sure why. Finality was so bittersweet in her opinion. She knew Daryl was the love of her life. Daryl was her soulmate. Marriage felt so intense though.

 

She had nobody else to commit to and couldn’t imagine living a life without Daryl Dixon. Marriage should be something she looked forward to; this conversation had her stomach churning though.

 

“I don’t really know how ta talk about this kinda stuff. What would you— I mean, what would’ya expect?”

 

He was tripping over his words. It made her feel bad with how bad his nerves were right now, but it also helped her in knowing she wasn’t the only one that felt that way. “Expect?”

 

“Ya know, a ring, engagement, all’at.”

 

Truthfully, Lilah hadn’t thought about any of that in a while. “I prefer yellow gold, nothing too flashy though.” That’s about all Lilah knew she wanted as far as rings went. She didn’t wear them much. “I don’t care too much about an engagement. My dad just has to know; you have to ask him for my hand. He’s talked about me getting engaged and married more than I have I think.”

 

“You’ve talked about yer weddin’ before though, figured you wanted something big.”

 

“I want a big wedding. Everything else though, I don’t care a whole lot about.” They laid in bed for a few more minutes in silence until Lilah finally rolled over onto his chest. “I’m not in a huge rush though, so don’t stress over anything.”

 

 

 

Lilah sat on the floor of Daryl’s living room as he stared at the sheet of paper that was supposed to be teaching him how to braid. She conned him into learning since he was always so adamant about her trying out his lifestyle. It was his turn to do something like that for once.

 

“Don’t know why ya need me doin’ yer hair anyways.” He grumbled as he criss-crossed the strands of hair.

 

“You never know when you might need to know how to do it Daryl Dixon.”

 

“Ain’t that hard anyways.” She felt a hair-tie being secured at the bottom of her hair. “It’s like tyin’ a knot.”

 

Lilah was terrible at braiding, so color her shocked when he’d only just started learning and already had it tied off. With a scoff she jumped up and went to see for herself.

 

“Everything okay princess?” His tone was taunting as he followed behind her.

 

It was loose and a little messy, but it looked decent. She would’ve been impressed if she wasn’t jealous at how easy it was for him. “Shut up.”

 

 

 

Lilah was sitting on the balcony of her apartment that Thanksgiving drinking wine with her mom. They were going to Oregon to visit her brother who just started an internship for Christmas, so she got them again for the November holiday. Daryl came this time and was being surprisingly social with her dad inside.

 

It made her heart skip a beat to see how far he’d come since their first meeting.

 

“What’s your plans for Christmas?” Her mom asked her.

 

“Mmm, probably at Daryl’s place.” She responded, unfocusing her periphery from inside the glass doors.

 

 

 

Daryl Dixon was chewing the inside of his mouth raw. He was going to talk to Lilah’s dad about marrying her. That was the first order of business.

 

He needed a drink.

 

Leaving the couch behind, he walked to the kitchen and pulled out a thing of whiskey he kept there.

 

“What you pouring over there young man?” Her fathers voice floated across the room.

 

“Little bit’a Jack.”

 

“Mind pouring me a glass?”

 

Daryl reached in the cabinet to grab another glass, before making his way back into the living room. He handed one drink over to Lilah’s father, then took a sip of his own.

 

He needed to just get it over with.

 

He was thinking too much.

 

“I uh, I actually needa talk to ya bout’ somethin’ while I gotta chance.” Daryl’s heart was beating out of his chest.

 

“Everything okay son?” Her father, Steve, asked.

 

“Yeah, yeah,” he took another swig from the glass. “It’s come up a couple times and I been thinkin’ bout’ askin’ Lilah to marry me.” Daryl wanted to throw up.

 

Her father didn’t respond. Instead, he downed the entire glass of whiskey in one swallow. “I think I need another drink.” Daryl swiftly grabbed the glass from him and walked back to the kitchen.

 

Steve Cabot knew this day was coming. His daughter had been in a relationship with the peculiar man for well over two years now. It was about that time the question would be on the table.

 

Still, he wasn’t ready for it.

 

He’d been Lilah’s sole provider since she was born. Even after turning 18, he kept her financially secure. He knew his daughter had a good head on her shoulders from an early age; a little bit of a smart-ass, but never the one he had to worry about making a lot of bad decisions. Steve didn’t mind continuing to provide for Lilah. As long as she was in college or getting her life started, he’d be there to support her.

 

Physically, emotionally, or financially.

 

How was he supposed to hand that over to someone else after so long?

 

Daryl handed him a full glass again. This time he only stared into the liquid.

 

Lilah still had another year left in college, more tests to take after that, then a career to start. Hell, maybe even more schooling if she decided to switch career paths this late in the game.

 

Marriage was a lot of stress.

 

He took a sip.

 

“When were you thinking about asking her?”

 

Daryl had grown used to the silence, he was nearly surprised by the question. “Don’t gotta date yet. Was thinkin’ over the summer, whenever she’s got more time on’er hands.”

 

Summer would be a good time. She wouldn’t lose her focus.

 

Steve didn’t dislike Daryl. He wasn’t overly fond of him in the beginning, that was mostly due to the fact he just didn’t want his daughter getting caught up in a relationship at all before she started law school.

 

Lilah was happy with him.

 

Even though it was a hard pill to swallow, Steve knew she was taken care of with him. Daryl had fixed countless things in her apartment that the complex wouldn’t fix themselves, he’d gotten her car back in commission, made sure she didn’t spend a holiday alone, and he’d even taught her things Steve never would’ve know. He still didn’t know how to drive a stick shift.

 

“You got a ring?”

 

Daryl shook his head, “Not yet. Gotta get’er ring size first.”

 

Throwing back the rest of the whiskey, Lilah’s dad leaned over the couch and stuck his hand out. “Just give me a heads up before you ask. I want to be in town for it.”

 

 

 

“C’mon blondie, keep up. Y’ain’t finna prove me wrong now.”

 

Lilah hated her life.

 

A few days before Christmas all of the Dixon’s ended up under the same roof for a brief period of time. An argument ensued between Daryl, his uncle, and his father, against Merle.A true pot-stirrer at heart, Lilah sided with Merle. She had no idea what they were arguing about.

 

But here she was.

 

Hiking through the woods, alone, with Merle Dixon.

 

He bet that the two of them could get a deer before the other three avid hunters. She had no choice but to stick to being stubborn and agree with him.

 

 

 

Lilah couldn’t believe how scared shitless she would be over a deer.

 

They’d been tracking one for what felt like hours at that point and she told Merle she needed to sneak away to pee. How the hell she snuck up on a deer instead, she had no idea.

 

She softly turned her head to see if Merle was still in sight.

 

Nope.

 

“Ain’t gotta worry bout you two motormouths, y’all probably scare the deer towards us if anything.” Daryl’s taunt echoed in her mind.

 

She needed something to encourage her to load and aim the rifle that she’d been carrying at the deer. She could do this. Lilah hadn’t actually shot a rifle in a few months, but the deer was right ahead of her. There’s no way she could miss it.

 

A deep breath in.

 

Target scored on the scope.

 

A deep breath out.

 

An ear ringing shot rang through the air.

 

Lilah could hear Merle cursing in the distance and his footsteps growing closer. When she dropped the gun down, the deer was gone.

 

What the fuck?

 

“You good Barbie? Ya didn’t shootcha self did’ya?”

 

“I’m okay,” she looked beside her as he passed through the bushes. “I think I shot a deer?”

 

“Ya either did or ya didn’t.”

 

She forced out a sharp sigh. “No, I shot at one. I swear I hit it, it was right there!” Lilah threw her arms up in disbelief.

 

Merle pushed past her and walked ahead. He was cursing under his breath but not loud enough for her to make out any sentences. Then he stopped and started cackling. “Bout right here huh?”

 

“Yeah, exactly right there.”

 

“Well sister Sue, get yer ass out here. We bout ta track that dead deer.”

 

Her face twisted in confusion until she stood beside him and saw blood splatter on the ground.

 

She had killed a deer.

 

“Girl, I will pin ya down if I got to. Getchur ass here.” Merle was laughing at her as he was cleaning her kill.

 

The other group hadn’t even made it back yet and it was nearly dark. The older Dixon was determined to put some blood from the deer on Lilah’s face, but she’d put it off, hoping he’d forget.

 

Tough luck on that one.

 

Begrudgingly the blonde girl walked towards him and grimaced as he smeared her forehead and cheeks with blood. Headlights shone in the driveway. Lilah couldn’t even hide the grin that was on her face as she walked from around back, Merle hot on her heels.

 

“Bullshit.” Was the first thing out of her boyfriend’s mouth when he stepped out the truck.

 

“Barbie killed her a buck Ken!”

 

Lilah honestly couldn’t tell who was happier— her or Merle.

Chapter 13.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

(don't drop the gif - I might write it) au victoria/bella prompts please

... Do you really mean AU as in Alternate Universe? Or uh... anything else.

I'm not sure I'm the idea fairy you're looking for but I can give it a shot:

Canon Divergent

That Time Victoria Got Bella and... No One Cared

New Moon happens, Bella's been dumped, the Cullens flee town and Edward forbids Alice from looking in on Bella's life. Victoria manages to get to Bella before Bella knows about the wolves/when she's real deep in depression (Bella's Port Angeles adventure ends up being Hallucination Edward telling her not to wander up to Victoria clearly watching her across a street. "Hello Darkness, my old friend" is what Bella says to that)

Victoria, delighted, prepares to kill Bella but realizes... no one's here... Revenge doesn't mean much if the person you're getting revenge on (Edward) isn't around. At first Victoria assumes he must be watching his precious human, but time passes and... he doesn't show up. The humans have accepted Bella died, where are the Cullens?

Victoria goes on a quest to find them, and there's a slow redemption arc as Victoria and Bella spend a lot of time in each other's company.

That Time the Hunt Went on Longer

Bella doesn't go to Phoenix when hunted by James. As a result, her father's murdered as is her mother and Phil. Bella lives out of hotel rooms, Edward refusing to turn her when Alice has admitted that James would have immediately stopped and gotten bored if Edward had done that. Bella realizes the rest of her life will be lived out of hotel rooms. She starts falling out of love with Edward as the situation becomes increasingly stressful and awful.

On the other side, this is getting spicy even for Victoria, as James is obsessing over this human girl and destroying her personality making it clear that Victoria's just an accessory/useful gift to him. Victoria is forced to realize James doesn't love her and is destroyed by this.

Victoria turns Bella in revenge against both the Cullens (who enabled the destruction of her life) and James (who proved he wasn't her savior after all).

Edward now has vampire Bella despite his best efforts and for all Bella tries to make it work they fall apart. During this she forms a shocking friendship then something more with Victoria.

Victoria Joined the Cullens

James never came across Victoria and hunted her down and at some point Victoria made the acquaintance of the weird hippies called the Cullens.

Desperate, Victoria trades human blood for protection and finds herself (along with Jasper) the very black sheep of the family who is a little less gung ho about this diet than the rest of them. It's cool not killing people, she guesses?

Bella finds herself first drawn to Edward in Biology but then meets his hot older sister (red hair, it's the role Victoria gets) and finds herself drawn to the mysterious black sheep of the family.

("I ate so many people with my coven that we started the witch hunting epidemic" - Victoria)

Things get extra spicy when Edward dumps Bella.

Awful AUs No One Should Ever Write

Bella's a Barista and Victoria's a customer with an awful boyfriend

It's Little Shop of Horrors and James is a plant Victoria keeps in her flat and Bella her clumsy coworker dating a questionable dentist

Victoria's a bride of Dracula (James) and Bella is a sad sad virgin sacrifice given to James to be another bride.

They're all human in high school. Edward's in orchestra, Bella's the shy wallflower who thinks he's so intellectual, Victoria is a punk delinquent with a shitty boyfriend. Aro's the principal. He's constantly accused of tyranny.

They're all working in the same company as humans. Bella doesn't know how the Xerox machine works.

Bella's a vampire now and Victoria's the human!

It's a mafia movie now. No, there's no vampires, it's just a mafia movie.

Victoria's a rock star with a secret identity and Bella's her biggest fan! There's a subplot where Bella dates Edward who is the band's pianist and Victoria hates her life.

[stop-talking]

ok this isnt a request or anything but i js thought it was a funny coincidence

im in a server and we were talking abt your mike dentist fic and remembered we talked abt derek having a hot doctor fantasy like a month ago lmao, and combined with the mike dentist fic idea i just went feral lmao

(i cant send images here so ima js transcribe them lol)

-do you thing he'es described his hot doctor fantasy to anyone, if he did i hope he told a therapist

-to mickey, OR WAIT, to wallace, "get me a doctor for my hangover, but make sure theyre hot" ",,,why mr danforth?" "uhhh uhmm,, bye"

- "mr danforth you have alcohol poisoning you need immediate medical attention" "if theyre not hot i thibk i'd rather just die"

-wallace just has a list of hot doctors at this point

-he had to after derek almost died like 5 times

-its just "hot doctor(emergency" "hot doctor(non life-threatening)" "hot doctor(routine checkup)" "hot doctor(psychiatrist)" (psych is never contacted once), etc

Okay I have quite a few thoughts on this.

First, people talk about my Mike x dentist fic?? 😭 Genuinely I thought yall were gonna think I was deranged for writing that, I wrote it all in a few hours on a whim. Purely self indulgent.

SECOND, DEREK HAVING A THING FOR DOCTORS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY.

LIke, imagine him scheduling his third goddamn prostate exam of the month, and the doctors are all just fucking sick of his bullshit.

So they just keep charging him more and more hoping it'll get him to stop, but of course he's a rich bastard so it doesn't deter him

And he treats every visit like it's a bad porn-o.

"Sure you don't want me to bend over for you?"

"I, uh, I can take my shirt off so you can listen to my heartbeat better."

"Oh, I don't need the hospital gown. I'm not shy. And blue isn't my color anyways. Maybe if you had a green one..."

[ryp3004]

So @hssprimefan asked about Ryanne's bio dad so I decided to put it here instead of reblogging that one post!

Michael was an okay guy. He was an athlete, he had good grades, his dad was an electrician and his mom was a secretary. Michael was the 6th kid of 7. His older siblings were awesome. 1 is a doctor, 2 works with dad, 3 is a dentist, 4 is a pilot, 5 is a lawyer, and 7 is some kind of genius. Michael doesn't know, he tries to keep his head down. Stay focused on the now. But he catches his Dad looking at him sometimes. Hears him when they think he's not listening. "The boy has no direction. No discipline. He's so different from the other kids... I just don't know where we went wrong."

Oh.

He... He didn't know they thought about him like that. That... That explains a lot.

Well, how is he supposed to live up to the others?

They've all got big fancy houses, drive nice fancy cars, have their own fancy families and still find time to send money home.

What's the point of trying?

When he's 15 he meets this girl, Becca. Becca's awesome. She doesn't give a shit what people think of her. She tells Michael that she's gonna direct movies. Like Stanley Kubric. Becca has a clockwork orange tattoo on her hip. "It's my favorite movie." Becca tells him with sparkling eyes. "The storyline, the camera angles, the sound mixing... It's all amazing! I want to make people feel like that one day... Pure awe!" And Michael believes her because Becca is incredible. She's so incredible, it was only a matter of time before he fell for her.

They've been together for a year when Becca sits him down.

"I'm pregnant."

...

Oh...

"I took the test earlier. I'm not sure how far along I am... I haven't told my parents yet."

Lucille and Adam Prince are going to kill him. Right after his parents kill him. Maybe before his siblings kill him., but Michael's not to sure.

"are you sure?" He asks softly, disbelieving. Becca nods and hands him four positive tests.

His parents already have grandchildren. 9, if he remembers right. This won't be as bad as he thinks... They'll tell him everything will be okay and that this is just one of those things, right?

They gave him an ultimatum.

Either break up with Becca and go to college and forget all about this or he's getting kicked out and cut off.

"God, Michael, I can't believe you! How could you be so irresponsible!?" His dad screams at him, shoving him out the door. "Go fix this, or you're out!" He can hear his mom pleading with his Dad, telling him that he's just a boy, he didn't know any better, they can fix this!

And Michael is scared. This is the first time in a long time Michael has been terrified. This wasn't what his life was supposed to be, he was supposed to go to college, get a good job, meet a nice girl, and settle down in a suburban neighborhood. Not... Becca. Not... Whatever's in her stomach.

So he makes his choice. Becca curses him out, slaps him so hard he can feel where her rings cut his cheek. But that's fine. He promises her he'll send her money to help out, but that's it. He doesn't want to know any more than that. And Becca tells him to go fuck himself as he gets in his car.

It'll be okay... Becca's strong, her parents are strong, her family will be fine.

Eight months later he gets a letter in the mail while he's packing up to go to University of Michigan. It's a photograph of a baby girl. HIS baby girl. Ryanne... He tests the name on his tongue and he can't stop saying it. That's his baby, he should be there with Becca, he needs to go to... Where? Becca said she doesn't want to see him... Said that he was nothing to her. This was just a courtesy. It should be just a blip in his radar.

Next year he gets another post card. Ryanne has his curls. She has his eyes. His mole. He puts the picture on his desk and when his roommate asks he says it's his little sister.

Every year he gets another post card. He graduates when Ryanne is 4. He gets a job at an architectural firm when she's 6. He starts getting his buildings built when she's 7. She's 10 when he finally decides to write her a letter. He tells her who he is. He tells her that he's sorry. He tells her that he's so proud of who she's become. He tells her to say hi to becca for him. He tells her that she doesn't have to respond.

But she does.

She writes him a letter.

She says she's not sure about Dad, but Mike seems nice enough and that she'd like to get to write him sometimes if that's okay.

She sends him a picture she took with a pumpkin she carved.

Michael gets 5 copies of the photo to put everywhere. One on his desk, one in his office, one in his car, one in his wallet, and one in his hallway.

He tells people that's his pumpkin when they ask.

That's his daughter, Ryanne.

She tells him about Becca and her new husband Tom. And Michael is so happy for her. So happy that she found someone who could do what he couldn't.

When Ryanne is 11 she invites him to her birthday party. It's just gonna be mom and dad, but it'd be cool if Mike was there, too :).

Michael takes off the weekend and buys her every flavor cupcake in the bakery.

Ryanne liked the ones that had pumpkins on the wrapper.

Becca took a picture of them together.

Michael makes as many copies as he can. One for every desk he owns. Every room in his house. Every wallet he buys or will buy.

When Ryanne gets a phone they start texting every so often.

He takes her on a week long vacation every summer.

He loves his daughter, and even though Ryanne doesn't call him Dad, he's happy to be Mike.

[dearfuturehusbandblog]

ZMAN CHEIRUSEINU aka "I'M the terrible communicator!?!?!?!!"

Dear Future Husband,

I hope nobody ever quizzes me on this blog because there are so many things that I've started and stopped writing that never got posted that I literally never remember what I've actually put here...

Not that that's really fully relevant to what I was thinking about writing now, but I currently have two unfinished posts in my drafts folder (amidst 25 others that will probably never get posted) that are just a recap of this year so far.

Because I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare.

Explaining what's going on right now is kind of problematic because I haven't provided the lengthy backstory yet (which is one of the drafts I have yet to finish...)

Suffice to say, MotherLivelyHeart is being a nightmare to me again.

I think I've shared before that MLH and I share a vehicle? If not... yeah, we share a car. I'll have to look through my posts to see if I've explained that situation before, because that's one more thing to check off the "my life absolutely f*ing sucks" list.

Usually this isn't the worst thing in the world because we operate on different schedules and there isn't much crossover when it comes to who needs the car when, and when there is I usually drop her off somewhere, do what I need to do, and pick her up after.

For the record, I HATE when she offers the opposite because I have a history of being abandoned in places waiting for her to pick me up and it gives me such severe anxiety.

So last week on Sunday I asked MLH what her plans were for the next day. I asked this because I overheard a phone call she received on Friday from the dentist's office about an appointment she had on Monday at noon that she hadn't told me anything about and I knew if I was going to ever find out she was going to take the car, I would have to be the one to ask her. So I asked. And wouldn't you believe it, she had a dentist appointment on Monday at noon! Shocker.

Now, I'd been out of work since the beginning of January (again, details will hopefully be in another post) so I had a lot to take care of at work last Monday and I told her that.

We agreed she would have the car for her appointment and I would take the car to work when she got home.

Come Monday afternoon, suddenly everything has changed.

You see, her boss called in sick and she had the day off because she has a specific job that requires her to work alongside her boss and if he doesn't work, she doesn't work.

So she had the day off. Joy.

Of course, did she tell this to me directly? No.

Did she message me this information? No.

I'm just supposed to approach her and ask, "hey, did your boss call in sick and give you the day off?" I guess.

So she went to her appointment and ran some errands and called me while she was still out. Apparently some specific water bottles she can only get in like two places were available at one store about 20 minutes away from our house and she placed a pickup order so she could get them before they were sold out. The order had to be picked up between like 2:30-3:30pm and she called me at around 1:30.

Great.

She picked a pickup time that was directly during the time I was supposed to be at work.

Which she knew.

Because I told her this literally the day before.

So I told her fine. She should do the pickup order and when she got back I would take the car to work.

"Well, I also wanted to go swimming."

*Deep breath* Ok, what time is swimming?

"From 2-9pm."

At this point I didn't know how long I'd be at work because one of the things I had to take care of could be like 4-6 hours and I didn't know if there would be enough time when I was done to get home and let her get to the pool with enough time to swim before they closed.

"Ok, well why don't you go swimming, do the pickup order, and then I'll take the car to work?"

"Well, I want to come home and eat something first."

Ok. So now, what was supposed to be my time to take the car is going to be "stolen" by her coming home (15 minutes), eating something (15 minutes), going to swim (40 minutes), getting the pickup order (30 minutes), and coming back home (20 minutes).

This is TWO HOURS off of my time.

WHICH I HAD TOLD HER I NEEDED LITERALLY THE DAY BEFORE.

So she came home, ate something, and changed into her bathing suit. She left around 2pm for the pool.

I assumed at this point I'd hear from her around 3:30pm that she was around the corner.

But 3:30 came and went.

4:00pm came and went.

4:30pm came and went.

5:00pm came and BigSis messaged that she would be done at work in an hour and could either of us give her a ride home?

MOTHERF@*$%^#$ER

So it's been three hours without an update from MLH, but then she responds "I should be on my way back from the pickup order then."

EXCUSE ME!?!?!?!

She left for the pool at 2pm. THREE HOURS have gone by and she hasn't even gotten the pickup order that was supposed to be picked up between 2:30-3:30pm!?!?!?!!?!?

But she tells me that I'M a terrible communicator.

I was supposed to get the car by 1:30pm latest. It was now after 5pm and I STILL hadn't gotten to work yet.

As much as I hate when she offers to drop me off at work so she can take care of things that will take a few hours, SHE DIDN'T EVEN ASK ME THAT. She made it seem like I would have the car all afternoon to take care of what I needed to at work. And when her plans shifted, she made it seem like I'd have the car by 3:30pm latest.

And let me remind you THAT I TOLD HER THE DAY BEFORE WHAT MY SCHEDULE WAS SO THAT THIS S*** WOULDN'T HAPPEN.

But I'M the terrible communicator.

At that point I was so frickin annoyed already. MLH messaged me "should I get her or just come home" and I was so peeved I said "just get her because if you come home and I take the car I'm not picking her up."

She didn't respond to that message.

Great.

No thumbs up. No "ok." Just nothing.

Then at 6:12pm I get a message from her "car's downstairs in front."

So no message from BigSis that MLH had picked her up and they were heading home. No "we're around the corner." No nothing except over an hour later "take it."

BUT I'M THE TERRIBLE COMMUNICATOR!?

At that point it was too late for me to do some of the things I needed to take care of for work because, again, I was supposed to have been there FIVE HOURS EARLIER. And a friend messaged and asked if I could go with her to Costco, so I said to hell with it and I went to Costco with her.

While I was at Costco I messaged both MotherLivelyHeart and BigSis about what I was getting so we were all on the same page. Included in that message was eggs because, well, I was getting eggs.

I got home at like 10pm and MotherLivelyHeart and BigSis were already asleep. I made a couple of mini salami kugels with some spinach that oddly floated to the top, waited for them to cool, tried 1/4 of one before sticking them in the fridge.

Next morning I open the fridge and there's a new carton of 1.5 dozen eggs. Because apparently MLH went to the supermarket early in the morning and got eggs because "we were out."

DESPITE ME LITERALLY MESSAGING THE NIGHT BEFORE THAT I WAS BUYING EGGS AT COSTCO.

Oh, but it gets better. Because the salami kugel I had tasted the night before was missing.

BigSis was working from home so I asked her about it and she said she had no clue.

So I asked MotherLivelyHeart about it, thinking maybe it slipped out of the fridge, smashed, and she threw it out.

But no.

Guess who ate it.

Yep, the woman who has been suffering from gout and avoiding meat for the better part of a year.

The woman who saw it in the fridge and said to herself "oh, that's one of the broccoli kugels LivelyHeart made for herself for Shabbos that she said wasn't good. I guess I'll eat that for breakfast without asking her if she really doesn't want it because although she's on a weird diet right now, there's no way she's made a meal plan for herself that includes this food item she made for herself."

Because, did she message me to ask if she could have it?

Nope.

Did she knock on my door to ask if she could have it?

Nope.

Halfway through eating it she realized it was salami.

And she still finished the whole thing.

And still at NO POINT did she message me AT ALL to even tell me that she ate it.

I had to find out by inquiring OF HER.

BUT. I'M. THE. TERRIBLE. COMMUNICATOR!?!?!?!

I shouldn't be mad.

It's just food, after all, right?

Except that it's not.

It's a frickin pattern of carelessness and disregard for me as a person.

And I'm so frickin sick of it.

I'm so damn tired.

It wouldn't have killed her to ask.

It wouldn't have killed her to apologize.

And what I haven't really explained here (because again, that's in a draft post) is that I've been on an elimination diet since January 1st which has cut most things from my available food selections.

But is she on an elimination diet?

Nope.

So we have a HOUSEFUL, a PANTRYFUL, and a FRIDGEFUL of food she can eat.

And she chooses the ONE thing I made FOR ME.

Which she KNEW I made for ME.

Instead of the MYRIAD OF THINGS that she can eat that I can't.

Which means that she's not only taken a meal from me, but now I'm at a food deficit from the fridge while she lives in abundance.

BUT. I'M. THE. TERRIBLE. COMMUNICATOR.

So let's leap forward to today.

Today was Shabbos mevorchim. Pesach is in two weeks.

And MotherLivelyHeart decided we are going to change over the kitchen two weeks ahead this year.

So she scheduled her cleaning lady to come tomorrow (Sunday) to help clean the kitchen so it can be turned over.

Did she take into account that this would be motzei Shabbos and that we'd have to make Shabbos and that would involve dirty dishes and use of the stove/oven and pots and pans?

Yeah, no.

Did she take into account that the way she wants to clean the oven requires the oven to be self-cleaned before and after which takes a good several hours and creates so much smoke that we'd have to keep the windows open and also it's like 40F right now and she also wanted to go to sleep early because the cleaning lady is coming at like 8am?

Yeah, no.

BigSis went over the oven cleaning thing with her and she exclaimed "are you kidding me?! Then why am I having the cleaning lady come tomorrow?!"

BECAUSE YOU SCHEDULED HER WITHOUT CONSULTING US.

BECAUSE THERE WAS NO COMMUNICATION.

DO YOU SEE A FRICKIN THEME HERE!?!?!!?

Oh, but there's more. Because there's always more.

Thursday was another nightmare day for various reasons. One of which was that I ran errands with MotherLivelyHeart.

She scheduled an appointment for smackdab in the middle of the time I told her I'd be working.

YES. AGAIN.

And she wanted to drop me off at work and pick me up when I was done.

Well absofrickinlutelynot, thankyouverymuch.

I was supposed to work until 6pm.

I had told customers I would be available until 6pm.

Her appointment was scheduled for 6pm.

So of course "I need the car at 5:30pm."

She wanted to drive me to work earlier so that she could take the car at 5:30pm to her appointment that wouldn't be done until 7pm and then come get me an hour and a half after I was done working.

But I was supposed to trust that she wouldn't run errands or dilly dally around and that she'd actually get me at 7:30pm, which we know is never the case.

So I told her no, I'd be taking the car to work. But I would notify the customers I'd only be there until 5:30pm, at which point I'd get her and drive her to her appointment. Then while she was in her appointment I could do the Shabbos shopping, since it seemed pointless to have to wait for her to come home again before I could go out and shop.

For various reasons, we had three stores we needed to go to, one of which was about 20 minutes in the opposite direction of where her appointment was. I figured I could go there first, then on my way back to get her I could run by the other two stores, get her and then we'd go straight home.

But no.

Because it was raining and people apparently don't know how to drive in the rain. So despite me taking the highway, which should have cut like 10 minutes out of the ride each way, it took me about 30 minutes to get to that first store, which I was in for maybe 10 minutes, and as I was checking out MLH messaged "my appointment is almost over, where are you at?"

So all I had time for was turning around and going straight to get her.

Which, fine, whatever.

One of the stores we went to literally just for chicken.

And it was chicken for her because she wanted a specific type of breaded chicken for Shabbos.

So I figured I'd run into the store and grab it while she stayed in the car.

But no.

Because while I was unbuckling, she was unbuckling. Because she decided to come in.

So she went to look at side salads and I went to the chicken section where I waited but she never showed up.

Then I get a message from her.

"Where are you?"

Excuse me???? WHERE ARE YOU, WOMAN???

I told her I was at the chicken section waiting for her and she said "I already checked out. I'm going back to the car."

WE LITERALLY WENT TO THIS STORE TO BUY HER CHICKEN.

SHE CAME IN WITH ME.

PRESUMABLY TO BUY HER CHICKEN.

But she's checked out already!? WITH WHAT!?

Oh. Apparently something to eat. Because she's hangry.

Which she, OF COURSE, DID NOT TELL ME.

Fine. Whatever.

So I bought her frickin chicken.

And then on the way home she got mad at me about three driving-related things that were out of my control (like the car started making a weird noise that might be the muffler, and there was a huge pothole I couldn't avoid, and I was coming to a stop at an intersection when some lady rounded the corner quickly and we barely missed colliding...) which resulted in her yelling at me that she hates the way I'm driving.

So, yeah, that was a fun ride home.

*EYEROLL*

Anyway, on the way to her appointment she said "we never worked out a Shabbos menu."

I told her the same thing I've told her almost every week over the last three months: I'm eating differently from you guys, so you just tell me what you want and I'll grab it from the store, because I already have set aside what I'm going to eat.

And she tells me "my boss has off tomorrow, so I can cook."

Which is perfectly fine in my eyes because I'm still recovering from an injury (again, that's one of the drafted posts...) and I also had a horrendous cold for the previous two weeks so I'm still trying to get back to baseline. Any pressure off me is appreciated.

We basically worked out that for shabbos we'd do a big soup for Friday night (which I would make), then she wanted chicken (obvs) and I had bought green beans at Costco I told her she could have, and then Shabbos lunch would be fish and salady stuff.

Well, Friday rolls around.

The day already sucked because I tried adding some vegetables back into my diet during the week that are apparently problematic for my digestion. Fun.

But then MotherLivelyHeart decides to stick to her arbitrary Pesach cleaning schedule which says to clean the milchig dishes she's had piling up all week. So of course she decides to do this at like noon and doesn't finish the job and there are still milchig dishes in the sink at 3pm when I need to go in and make the soup.

Add onto that, one of my "chores" is the pareve dishes, some of which have been piling up too and also need to be done, which she feels the need to remind me of, despite her milchig dishes still filling the sink.

So I go in around 3pm and just start cooking, using the small bit of counter space that's available to me.

She decides that's the perfect time to finish the milchig dishes.

FINE. WHATEVER.

She gets them out of the way and reminds me YET AGAIN about the pareve dishes.

FINEWHATEVER.

So around 4pm I'm back in the kitchen, doing the pareve dishes, of which I only got about half done because it was causing pain and I still had to cook.

So I pivoted and did the soup.

But nothing else had been cooked yet.

So I made the green beans.

And I had to separate the soups so I could add things to theirs that I can't eat.

At this point I'm still annoyed from her the day before, my insides are so unhappy with the newly tested foods, I'm in pain from the injury, and I'm trying to cook for Shabbos.

Around 6pm I asked BigSis if she could help with the chicken. She was like "I STILL HAVE TO SHOWER!!!" As though she didn't have all day for that and somehow me needing help is my fault. She said "if you had asked me like three hours ago I could have done it."

Except that three hours ago, the milchig dishes were still filling up the sink, so.... what exactly do you expect from me!?

Sometime a little earlier when MotherLivelyHeart had been in the kitchen it was clear I wasn't doing so well and she asked what was wrong and I described the pain and she was like "I'm sorry" and then disappeared.

So then she gets a "20 minutes to candle lighting" alarm on her phone, and she's been trying to light early in zchus of the hostages and chayalim, so she calls out "20 minutes to licht benchen." Which I responded to but she didn't hear, obviously, because she yelled again "LivelyHeart, did you hear me!?"

To which I responded an annoyed "YES!!" and she was like "you don't have to talk to me that way! I clearly didn't hear you. And BigSis and I can make Shabbos on our own, you know."

Which, MYGODWOMAN. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO.

My responsibility based on our conversation was the soup.

ZE HU.

SHE was supposed to do the chicken and the green beans and whatever else they wanted.

So now she's annoyed at me because I'm annoyed at her for not doing the thing she was supposed to do, but I'M the one in the wrong.

FINE. Whatever.

In the end I didn't do the chicken.

I literally didn't have the strength for it, let alone the energy.

Not that it was really missed at the meal, but she was a bit annoyed and gave me that same "BigSis and I can cook for Shabbos on our own, you know." To which I responded "You said you were going to cook." I literally don't even remember what her response was.

Well, fast forward through Shabbos to tonight because I asked her if she wanted the chicken for melava malka or if we should stick it in the freezer for a week since it's KFP.

She wanted it for melava malka.

Which, fine, whatever.

I told her if she could bread it, I would cook it.

She got gloves, she got bowls, she got the chicken, and she got eggs.

She did not get the other ingredients she needed for the breading. Or a plate to put it on. Or a fork.

She sat down at the table and then asked me to get the other ingredients.

Which, fine. Whatever.

I got an interesting piece of mail that I'll discuss in another post when I know more what's going on with it, but it basically called my attention to research something. So I was on my computer off to the side while she was breading the chicken.

The next thing I know, she's frying the chicken.

I went into the kitchen and asked her why she was frying it when I told her I would do it for her since cooking usually exhausts her, and she got all frustrated and exasperated at me and said something like "I DON'T HAVE ALL NIGHT TO WAIT FOR YOU."

And I was like, "what are you talking about!? I was waiting for you to finish breading it! you didn't tell me you were done!"

Which just pissed her off more.

BECAUSE. I'M. THE. TERRIBLE. COMMUNICATOR.

But this is the time of year we celebrate freedom, right?

This is the time of year we thank Hashem for rescuing us from a horrible situation.

Well, where's mine?

We're supposed to celebrate every year as though WE ALL left Mitzrayim.

As though we were ALL saved.

But I am not saved.

I have never been saved.

The stupidity I've just described above is just a piece of the insane patterning of my entire life.

I have no escape from this nonsense.

And I'm just so done with all of it.

I want it all to be over.

I want it all to go away.

Where's my freedom?

Where's my salvation?

I really have to finish those other two drafts, because this isn't even the clearest picture of what I've been dealing with since 2024 started. It's barely April and I just want this secular year to be over.

There are a couple of people who have suggested guys to me over the last several months and, although they're not really what I'm looking for, right now I just don't have the emotional energy for a new relationship. I'm just so burned out from this one that I deal with every frickin day of my stupid life, which of course I can't even tell these people.

So... dear future husband, I hope you can hang in there, because I don't know when I'll be ready for you.

But maybe by then I'll be a good communicator.

-LivelyHeart

And now for the story after the story:

So, after that disaster of a drive back from the store on Thursday night, we got home around 8:30pm and although she got something small to eat from that second supermarket I knew that MotherLivelyHeart hadn't eaten anything since lunch so when I made dinner for myself I made a second bowl for her. I brought it to her and she said "oh... you didn't have to do that." Not a lot of enthusiasm there.

She didn't eat it for about a half an hour, by which time it was probably cold, and the next thing I knew, she was in bed going to sleep without another word about how it was.

Now, I don't demand praise or feedback for anything I cook, but she usually makes a comment about whatever I make, so I found it odd that she was silent on the matter.

On Friday I went to ask her about something else and while I was talking to her I asked how her dinner was the night before and she said something along the lines of, "it was... interesting. ground chicken just doesn't cook well, it's not your fault. you prepared it well, it's just not that good. ground turkey is better."

No "thank you," no "it was sweet of you to think of me," no "I appreciate the effort especially considering that you're working through the pain right now."

Just meh.

I love when I'm appreciated.