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#help I only have 9 tickets
marali-iin · 2 months
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"Gallagher copy"
"Sparkle face"
They can't make me hate you baby no matter what <3
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I'll pull for her, Idc about the meta or popular opinion
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The world is so hostile to tweens.....
Like we joke about how our schools growing up would ban the latest toy trends, but that reality genuinely horrific when you think about it. Like maybe 1% of the bans were based on safety, but the rest cited reasoning like
-"kids were bartering for collectibles" (kids learning about economics and product value)
-"kids were wearing them and the colors were too flashy" (kids experimenting with self expression and fashion)
-"kids were playing with them during lunch and recess instead of using our rusted safety hazard playground" (kids utilizing their free time to do what helps *them* unwind).
Play areas specifically geared towards children and especially towards teens are constantly being shut down. "Oh kids today are always on their phones!" Maybe because
-there are barely any arcades left and even less arcades that aren't adult-oriented,
-public pools and gyms are underfunded and shut down,
-"no loitering" laws prevent kids and teens from just hanging out,
-movie theatres only play the latest films and ticket prices are only rising,
-parks and playgrounds are either neglected or replaced with gear only directed at toddlers and unsuitable for anyone older
-genuine children's and young teen media is being phased out in favour of media directed only at very small children or older teens and adults.
-suburbs and even cities are becoming more and more hostile to pedestrians, it's just not safe for kids to walk to or ride their bikes to their friends' houses or other play destinations
Children's agency is hardly ever respected. Kids between the ages of 9-13 are either treated as babies or as full-grown adults, with no in-between. When they ask to be given more independence, they are either scoffed at or given more responsibilities than are reasonable for a child their age.
This is even evident in the fashion scene.
Clothing stores and brands like Justice and Gap are either closing or rebranding to either exclusively adult clothing or young children's clothes, with no middle ground for tweens. Tweens have to choose between clothes designed for adults that are too large and/or too mature for their age and bodies, or more clothes they feel are far too childish. For tween girls especially it's either a frilly pinafore dress with pigtails or a woman's size dress with cleavage. No wonder tween girls these days dress like they're older, it's because their other option is little girl clothes and they don't want to feel childish.
And then when tweens go to school, the books they want to read aren't available because they cover "mature" topics (read: oh no two people kissed and they weren't straight or oh no menstruation was mentioned or oh no a religion other than Christianity is depicted), so kids are left with books for way below their reading level. No wonder kids today are struggling with literacy, it's because they can't exercise and expand their reading skills with age-appropriate books. Readers need to be challenged with new words and concepts in order to grow in their skills, only letting tween read Dr. Seuss and nursery rhymes doesn't let them learn.
Discussions about substance use, reproduction, and sexuality aren't taught at an age-appropriate level in school or even by children's parents, so they either grow up ignorant and more vulnerable to abuse, or they seek out information elsewhere that is delivered in a less-than-age-appropriate manner. It shouldn't be a coin-toss between "I didn't know what sex was until I was 18 and in college" or "my first exposure to sex as a tween was through porn" or "I didn't know what sex was so I didn't know I was being sexually abused as a kid."
Tweenhood is already such a volatile and confusing time for kids, their bodies are changing and they're transitioning from elementary to middle to high school. It's hard enough for them in this stage, but it's made worse by how society devalues and fails them.
We talk about the disappearance of teenagehood, and maybe that's gonna happen in the future, but the erasure of tweenhood is happing in real time, and it's having and going to have major consequences for next generation's adults.
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songmingisthighs · 18 days
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Missing Out
group : ateez
pairing : dilf!mingi × reader
genre : smut
wc : 4.1 k
tw : mdni, explicit smut; daddy kink, teasing, dirty talk, age gap (mingi's like mayhaps at least a decade older, but both are still within legal limits), thigh riding, spitting, alcohol consumption (not to the point of being drunk, it's just for vibes and... spitting lmao),
a/n : frfr i hope he doesn't see this fic because God i would not be able to defend myself. tbh i planned on posting this on mingi's bitthday but i got shit happening to me. shit without my consent and I'm just trying to ride the stress like gandalf hopped up on cocaine riding smaug. so ykw i decided to post this on my birthday instead lmao. special thanks to @kitten4sannie for listening to me drop some ideas while i was on a road trip, i did some adjustments but it's still sexually frustrated dilf!mingi this fic is finally out so i hope you and everyone enjoy it <3
a/n/n : i take no responsibilities for any calf cramp that may or may not happen but alyssa, i still blame you for the great leg cramp at ass o'clock
a/n/n/n : my birthday sucks because it felt more like public service than anything but i got ticket to go to singapore again so i'll be reunited with my little brother and little sisters soon✌️ i'm raising money for my mental wellbeing which is so totally code for i'm trying to find a way to make my shituation better by making myself just the slightest bit happier after today's shenanadoodles
buy me coffee ?
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After the day Mingi had, the cold drink in his hand felt like the reward he deserved. It was only then that Mingi realized why people always say that the Family Court is rough. Still, of course, it was extra rough for him because his ex-wife, the horned creature incarnate (a goat, not the devil), had dragged his name through the mud just to get the maximum alimony because she was a narcissistic bum with no life skill to fall back to as if Mingi was the one who told her to quit her job as a dental hygienist when they first got married.
During the mediation meetings and court proceedings, she took all of the potshots she could While no one took her seriously, it still pained Mingi because the more she and her lawyer attacked him, calling out all of his insecurities and questioning his character, the more obvious it was that Mingi had wasted 9 years of his life on this loser and he missed out on all of the marital milestones. The main sore spot was having kids. She argued that putting her body through pregnancy was out of the question because there were risks that could cause her body to look weird in the future and it's inhumane how a woman's body had to contort in such a way to accommodate another living being. But when her breast implant popped when she slammed the car door too hard, it was 'a normal occurrence'.
As much as his friend Yunho told him not to, Mingi couldn't help but wallow in the time he absolutely WASTED on the bitch only to be screwed over. The only good thing that came out of the divorce was the fact that he got out of it without having to pay alimony because his ex-wife had become too cocky with her cards. But still, Mingi had to give her the car, the savings account (that wasn't much compared to anything considering she had drained it to accommodate her filler addiction and alcohol dependency), and Tony Son, their personal trainer, the one thing Mingi could credit her because she had been the one who introduced him to the man who was able to sculpt his body to perfection.
"Is this seat taken?"
Mingi snapped his head to the side to see a woman younger than he, dressed in a tight-bodiced red sparkly dress that showed just enough cleavage for it to be classy rather than trashy and the A-line satin skirt stopped just three fingers width atop her knees. Slowly, Mingi nodded and gestured to the seat on his right side wordlessly. It wasn't until the woman flagged down the bartender and ordered her drink did Mingi questioned why she sat next to him when there were other seats in the bar.
"So, are you alone?" she asked, striking up a conversation with Mingi which honestly caught him by surprise because he had been told that he had a resting bitch face that doubled in intensity when he wasn't in the mood and he was doubling in his bad mood. "Yeah... I am, so..." his words allude to him wanting to be alone, but there was something about the person next to him that intrigued him so much so that his eyes seemed to be glued to her. Just the sight of her drinking her vodka cranberry made Mingi's eyes travel from her face down to her lap, watching the way she moved so gracefully. "So... You don't mind my asking why a man as handsome as you are would be sitting alone with a scowl on his face," she pointed out, forcing Mingi to consciously unfurrow his eyebrows and fake taking a sip of his drink, "I'm not scowling, I'm just tired and pissed off for wasting 9 years on a selfish bitch that deprived me of anything I want in life," he spat venomously, even the slight mention of his ex sent a really unpleasant taste in his mouth. "I'm so sorry to hear that. Anything I can do to help?" She pouted, inching closer to Mingi as somewhat of a signal. Noticing this, Mingi scoffed and shook his head but he still entertained the woman, "Got a time machine to help me undo the past 9 years?" "No, but maybe I can give you what your ex couldn't."
You couldn't help but bite your bottom lip when the look of shock on Mingi's face melted into intrigue. You had been watching him for an hour, sitting all alone, nursing his one drink as he toyed with his ring before chucking it into his breast pocket. Thank God he did because you were not about to approach a potentially spoken-for man. It took you a while to get substantial evidence of his status and it wasn't just because you were distracted by his plump ass in those slacks and the matching suit jacket and slightly unbuttoned black dress shirt didn't help your case.
"Little girl, I think I'm a bit too... Far for your reach," Mingi pointed out, raising an eyebrow at you as he wasn't sure that you knew what you were offering him. Mirroring him, you raised your eyebrow and shifted so that you faced him fully as you raised one leg and cross it over the other, successfully inviting Mingi to get a glimpse of more skin. "You don't know me or what I can do, sir," you smirked challengingly, now openly inviting him to poke you further.
You were delighted when you saw Mingi's jaw clench and throat bob after you called him sir. It was proof to you that Mingi had some sort of inclination of being in control and his little confession about not getting what he wanted from his ex-wife might be a glimpse of the kind of fun you could get from him. So without hesitation, you decided that you were going home with him.
Surprisingly, Mingi responded positively by leaning in to cup your chin and pull you close, just a wispy breath away from having your lips meet and you so desperately wanted to taste his because they just looked so damn juicy and plump. "You don't want to know all the things I've been deprived of... Baby." Your eyes darken and your legs crossed tighter to suppress the sudden arousal washing over your core, excited at the confirmation that Mingi was playing into your games just as you had wanted. All you needed to do was lock this down. So you let your hand lay on his thigh, squeezing it suggestively and enjoying the feeling of his muscle tensing underneath you each time your hand slid closer to his crotch to the point that your nail was scratching the inner side of his thigh just right. Despite being physically affected by you, Mingi still maintained eye-contact, daring you to poke his button just right.
"Yes, I do... Daddy."
In the blink of an eye, Mingi smashed his lips on you and all of the oxygen was knocked out of your lungs in one go. His lips were soft but the way he used them was rough yet calculated. You could taste the smoky whiskey on his tongue as he slipped it inside your mouth. Little did you know, he too, was enjoying the way you tasted. Your lip gloss had a sweetness to it that made him wonder if you're the type to plan things or if it was just a happy coincidence. He also took note of how you allowed him to lead you and the more he asserted himself onto you with every nibble of his lip and every caress of his tongue, showing that you're more on the submissive side and he likes it. A lot. The more you felt pleasure, the more you pleasured him back as evidenced by your hand rubbing against his raging boner.
Mingi smirked at the way you whimpered when he finally pulled away from you to slap a couple bills on the counter before he got off the stool, pulling you along with him. You wobbled slightly but Mingi immediately pulled you flush on his chest and despite having just made out with him, you found the gesture very hot. "Wanna go see if you can keep up with the list of things I missed out on?"
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Mingi must be some kind of a business owner because no way he would have had a rather impressive office where you found yourself in. Well, on top of him on his couch, grinding your panty-less core against his thigh with your top down, allowing the older man to ogle at your tits as you tried to make yourself cum.
"Is that the best you can do?" Mingi taunted, circling his crystal glass which produced a tinkling sound from the ice in the drink he poured as soon as you reached his home. "Daddy, I want you to touch me," you whined but your hip was still relentlessly moving after making a big deal of how his thighs were so strong and you wanted to sit on them like a throne. So instead of just sitting, Mingi told you to make yourself useful and prep your pussy without his help and he wanted you to do it by riding his thigh. His thick, glorious thigh. "Don't you want to touch me, daddy?" you teased, cupping your boobs and tweaking your own nipples whilst throwing your head back, making a show out of it just to get Mingi to touch you. Sure, Mingi was intrigued, but he knew damn well that he was holding the reigns and he had to hold himself back from jumping at the opportunity to completely ravish you too soon. "I do, baby, but you're being a brat right now and refusing to listen to me. Had I wanted that, I would've stayed with my ex-wife." Your head snapped back up at the mention of his ex-wife and you glared at his smug smirking face, "You have me half naked on your lap and you still mentioned your ex-wife?" you gathered your skirt in your hand, exposing your cunt to Mingi's eyes and slowed your pace to a prolonged drag that left long, dark stain courtesy of your arousal.
Finding your petulance adorable, Mingi chuckled and pulled you in for a searing kiss with one hand cupping your chin and the other slapping you on the ass as if telling you to speed up your movement. "You're an adorable little doll and I'm gonna break you," he muttered against your lips before you could reply to him, Mingi tugged your hair back as he casually took a sip from his drink. The action made you yelp and Mingi swiftly leaned over and spit the drink into your mouth and clamped your jaw shut. "Swallow," he commanded and as you came down from being surprised, you stared into Mingi's eyes. At first, you only stared at him, feigning defiance just for fun and Mingi found that both intriguing and annoying. His grip moved to tightly grasp your jaw and he growled, "Swallow. It." He demanded in a stern voice that made your panties more damp as your cunt clench, leaving you unable to do anything more than whine and swallow the burning liquid. Mingi found you very mesmerizing even on an act as simple as you taking heed of his words. The stray spit and alcohol that trickled from the corners of your lips enhanced the glimmer of your smudged lipstick and lipgloss combo, turning Mingi on with how effortlessly sultry you looked. He was down and he was down bad. He wasn't even sure if he was down because Once the liquid was no longer there, you rolled out your tongue to proudly show your obedience and Mingi let out a shuddered breath seeing you just blindly following his orders like the good puppet you are.
"Fuck, you're gonna be the death of me."
In a flash, Mingi flipped you both around so that you were trapped underneath him with your head strategically on the armrest. The elevation allowed you to watch as Mingi dragged a hand down your body as if you were a work of art. "All this time... I was missing a lot all this time, that bitch took nine years out of me and gave me nothing," Mingi shuddered both in anger and in arousal. The contrasting thoughts between being so angry at his former partner and the excitement of being rewarded by being able to ravish you felt like waves crashing inside him. It was thrilling. It was exciting. It got his adrenaline pumping and God, he felt alive. "Poor baby," you purred all the while slowly popping the buttons of his dress shirt off to reveal the soft skin underneath, "You're so frustrated, It's a good thing I'm here now huh?"
You swung your leg up and used the tip of your toe to tilt Mingi's chin upwards maintaining a somewhat neutral expression but the twinkle in your eyes indicated clear intrigue. "Tell me all the things you want to do. What do you want most?" the question made Mingi roll his eyes back and he grabbed your leg by your ankle. "You nasty slut, you want to have an older cock so bad you're enticing me with empty promises, huh?" He mumbled against the skin of your leg, trailing his lips down from the heel and lower to your calf as his body followed down until he eventually stopped at the mid-section of your inner thigh. You helped him by flipping your skirt up, exposing your cunt wholly to him and slotting the leg you lifted on his shoulder, "Empty promises? I want to give you whatever you want daddy, and in order for me to be able to do that, I need to know what it is."
Thinking that he had nothing to lose anyway, Mingi smirked and decided to test you. "I want a baby," he stated, "I want to put my baby in you," he said oh so casually as if he hadn't had his fingers poking and prodding your cunt like they just belonged there. Truthfully speaking, Mingi was expecting you to push him off and ran away screaming because what kind of a hookup just casually dropped a bomb as big as he did?
But it seemed like Mingi's luck was turning around for the better because you replied by reaching forward to free his cock from his pants, trying as best as you could to suppress the surprise at Mingi's size (but failing as evidenced by the way your eyes bulged slightly and your tongue peeking out to lick your bottom lip in hunger) before you leaned back and opened your legs widely as an invitation for him. "Then do it, fuck me so hard and dumb and deep that I'd have no other choice but to have your baby," you smiled up at him. Mingi could only stare at you in shock initially, not really knowing what you meant until you whined and pulled him closer using the leg that was hooked on his shoulder. "Daddy, don't make me wait too long. Come on, put a baby in me!" you pleaded, cunt throbbing with eagerness to feel Mingi's cock stretching you now that you already caught a glimpse.
The shock melted away from Mingi's face and even as he was guiding his cock to your core, he was still carefully watching your face, not wanting to waste any twitch or shift in your face from feeling him but also he was trying to be careful in case you showed him any indication of regret or if you changed your mind. But the way you whined and rolled your hips so your wet cunt could meet his cock more gave him the green light.
"You dirty slut," Mingi grunted before he shoved his length inside you in one fluid movement. The accumulating arousal from you riding his thigh provided proper lubrication but his sheer size was not something you're used to so your body tensed up at the impact. "F-fuck, daddy, y-you-" "Am I tearing you apart, baby? Are you being split into two on daddy's fat cock?" he asked in faux worry that was just him being condescending towards you. But you don't care, you found it hot even when he talked down to you as if you were nothing but his plaything. "Yes, yes, daddy, I'm being split open on your cock but I love it! I love it so much!" you moaned, hands clawing at his skin, causing red streaks to appear from the pressure of your nails, "Fuck, I want more!"
With that, Mingi pushed your legs up by your thighs, exposing more of your lower half to him. "Be daddy's good girl and hold these open, I wanna see your pussy taking my cock raw," he hissed, eyes zeroing on the way your puffy lips split open to accommodate his size. Carefully, as if assessing a great piece of art, Mingi watched attentively The view almost brought tears to his eyes but he channeled the somewhat endearing moment into fucking you stupid into the mattress.
Each drag of Mingi's cock felt like fire against your inner walls. Although there was a slight discomfort with each movement, the added pleasure of being filled like you had never before made you addicted.
If you thought you were enjoying yourself, Mingi was very close to combusting and he was trying his best to not cum too soon as he didn't wanna be branded as the geezer who came too early. But he couldn't help it, not with the way both his ego and his cock were stroked. It was as if you were made for him and he felt that the moment he entered your sopping cunt. So Mingi shifted his focus to you instead, working to get you to cum first.
"Come on baby, cum for daddy. I need you to cum first so you'd be ripe and open for me to fill you up," Mingi huffed, pressing his pointy nose against the junction of your neck that sent tingles down your spine, "We need to do our best to make sure that you'd be good and pregnant, right?" The weight of his words caused your head to spin as the thought of him filling you full for his own pleasure filled your mind. "Yes, yes daddy, make me cum please," you whined into his ears, your body reacting almost automatically by rolling your hips against his own to match his speed and desire. Mingi growled hungrily and his pace quickened significantly as the impact got harder. You were sure that after this your ass would be different shades of red and blue but you couldn't care less. Especially if Mingi wanted to do more rounds with you, you'd gladly wear the bruises like a badge of honor.
"Fuck, you're so hot like this, you're so hot when you're willing and submissive for me," Mingi grunted, even verging on whining into your ears because you just felt so good to him but he held firm, "Are you close, baby? Are you cumming soon?" Lucky for him, you nodded hurriedly, confirming that you were close. Your brain had been marinating in the dizzying arousal that it was embarrassingly quick for you to nearly reach your climax in a rather short time. However, your response was deemed lacking to Mingi who wanted to hear a verbal response from you. Mingi was quick to slap you hard on your left tit as a punishment, feeling the need to chastise you for simplifying your response.
The words died on Mingi's tongue and his hips sharply halted to a stop when he saw you yelp and shudder before coming completely undone underneath him, writhing pathetically as your nails grazed his skin, leaving red streaks for Mingi to show off for days on end. His eyes darken when he saw tears pooled in your own eyes before dropping, creating the illusion of your eyes sparkling which served a rather complex combination of innocence and sinful. "M-M- Daddy," you whimpered in almost a hushed tone, barely comprehensible but to Mingi the sound was thunderous in Mingi's ears, ringing, because his baby girl needed him. His baby girl wanted him. His baby girl who's willing to give him anything he could ask for was longing for him. So who is he to deny you?
Seeing you in such a vulnerable state seemed to unlock something primal in Mingi because while you were reeling down from your orgasm, Mingi was instead put into some sort of a trance. His tongue darted out to lick his bottom lip, slightly hoping that he could taste your sweetness in the air, and his hips restarted with a pace so hard and quick, for a moment you forgot that Mingi was a human.
The pleasure from your orgasm tripled with the additional friction continuously given by Mingi whose head was flooded with the thought of truly possibly getting you pregnant from this first time. Not that he was planning on only fucking you once, not after he felt how good you made him feel both emotionally and physically. He was planning to pamper you to death and maybe that was the sexually frustrated side in him but he didn't care, he didn't care how crazy he was because you were the one who made him crazy.
The sound of hips snapping together in a rhythm accompanied by your drunk-like moans sounded like a symphony in Mingi's ears. "F-fuck baby, I'm gonna fill you up now," Mingi grunted, his eyes closing and his forehead dropping to your shoulder, "I'm gonna fill you up with my seed to the brim and you're gonna be a good girl and keep it all in so my baby can grow safely inside of you, okay?" He whispered so intimately against your shoulder that both your lips and cunt wept. You wouldn't be surprised if there was a pool underneath you after you were done and you won't hesitate to ask for more. "Cum, daddy. Cum inside me. Fill me up so hard and full like you promised me!" You whined, your hands snaking around his shoulders to hold tight as the overstimulation caused a tingling pain that made your toes curl while Mingi was getting such a high from his ego being fed.
"Fuck, baby girl, this is it, I'm gonna put my baby in you!" Mingi grunted and thrusted, once, twice, thrice, before his hips stuttered and you felt a gush of warmth spilling deep inside your cunt. The physical feeling of being filled up made your eyes roll into your head and the realization of what just happened made you blush as if you weren't whoring for his cock not 10 minutes ago.
As Mingi slowly came down from his high, his mind cleared up and he was able to pepper kisses from your shoulders, up your neck, along your jawline, and then gently all over your face. The contrast of the sweetness of the older man and the nasty act you both just did made you suddenly turn all giggly and shy. "Aww, come on, are you trying to get away from me?" Mingi smirked, trying to chase another kiss from your lips but you kept dodging him, "That's pretty absurd considering I still have my cock inside of you, plugging you full." Your eyes widened at the vulgarity of his chosen words and you couldn't help but smack him on the shoulder but fail to hold back a giggle, "Don't say it like that!" "Like what? Like the way it is?" Mingi teased, pushing himself up to trail a finger on your stomach which made your breath hitch and your muscle to tense, "I need to make sure you really do get pregnant so you can give me my baby just like I wanted," his voice trailed as his fingers drew patterns on your skin almost lovingly and the nonsensical side of you wanted to believe that he was showing his affection to you. You figured that there was only one way to find out.
Without missing a beat, you took his finger that was tracing your skin into your mouth and start licking around as if it was a lollipop, effectively causing Mingi's attention to shift to your face and his cock to twitch inside you. "Who said we're only gonna try this once, daddy? You're gonna fuck me as much as you like until I'm good and pregnant."
The smirk that bloomed on Mingi's face was devilish and almost menacing, showing his genuine intention to get wamhat he wanted.
"I hope you'd never ask. I'm gonna fuck you all night long and you're gonna be a good girl and take it all with no complaint."
As if you'd say no.
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@cultofdionysusnet @sandsofire @kflixnet @pirateeznet
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@kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @skzatzloveismonsterous @memorymonster @surveilenceysystem @dreamlesswonder86 @maddiebabyxoxo @imababywolf @do-you-actually-care @marievllr-abg @ilsedingsx @wasteitonserendipity @bbymatz @noonaishere @honeyhwaaa @ateezourstars @yoonjunshi @yoongiigolden @camillelafaye @charreddonuts @kpopnightingale @starryunho @atinct @mirror-juliet @hyuckilstan @jayb17 @kpoplover718 @haatohwa @x-bluee @erinaimeexx @blackb3ll @mingiholic @itasluv @vampcharxter @meowmeowminnie @marvelous-llama @kawennote09 @hongjoong-lovebot @stopeatread
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keerysfreckles · 5 months
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so american — MV1 (smau)
pairing: max verstappen x fem!reader faceclaim; sabrina carpenter
summary: fans seem to notice y/n's song is about her best friend
warnings: like one curse word, google translated dutch
a/n: i. love. smaus.
masterlist !
⋆ ˚ 。 ⋆ ୨୧ ˚
yourusername just posted !
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liked by maxverstappen1, carlossainz55 and 22,187 others
yourusername summer 🌟💐🍪🎀💿🪐🍋🐴 maxverstappen1
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user1 GORGEOUS GIRL!!!!!!
user2 y/n giving us max content during the break 🤞
danielricciardo never doing a 3 minute plank with max again
carlossainz55 save me a cookie 🍪🍪
yourusername ofc 😚
user3 who's still waiting for y/n's debut single
maxverstappen1 will you actually let me help with the cookies next time
yourusername only if you don't spill flour all over my floor again 🤗
maxverstappen1 just posted !
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maxverstappen1 what an amazing weekend in my home race, got to spend it with some lovely people 💙💙
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user1 TU TU TU TU MAX VERSTAPPEN
user2 is that y/n in his hat in the end????????
lewishamilton pleased to be on the podium with you again lad 🙏🏾
user3 that HAS to be y/n
user4 omg y/n's first race?????
yourusername first time hearing the dutch anthem in person, i get the hype
user5 why can't you guys be happy about max's win? why does everything have to be revolved around y/n (no hate i swear) they've been best friends for years, why all the rumors now?? liked by maxverstappen1
twitter !
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yourusername just posted !
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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 401,773 others
yourusername who's gonna tell seven year old me SHE'S GOING ON TOUR!!!!!!!!! tickets are on sale tomorrow at 9 am pst 💌
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user1 GOING TO AS MANY SHOWS AS I CAN
user2 no arkansas date 💔💔
landonorris if we're friends do we get free tickets 🤭🤭
yourusername no 🫶🏻 only max
landonorris WHAT
carlossainz55 me and charles are so proud of you y/n ❤️
yourusername 🥹🥹🥹
user3 AWWW LITTLE Y/N 😭😭
user4 tour needs to start RIGHT NOW.
maxverstappen1 🫶🏻
yourusername 🫶🏻
twitter !
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yourusername just posted !
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liked by maxverstappen1, alex_albon and 774,193 others
yourusername he laughs at all my jokes and he says i'm so american 💌 maxverstappen1
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user1 I FUCKING KNEW IT
user2 oh to have a love song written abt you by the one and only y/n 😖😖😖😖
danielricciardo you should've seen the smile on his face when he realized the song was about him
yourusername AWW DANNY YOU WENT TO THE SHOW TOO 🥹
danielricciardo me, max, lando, alex and checo went 😁 gotta support our fav girl
user3 the cutest hard launch ever 😭😭
maxverstappen1 time for me to write a song about you liefje
yourusername baby leave the song writing to me, you can do the fast cars thing
alex_albon are you guys our paddock parents
yourusername .....................yes
maxverstappen1 added to their story !
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[mijn liefje 💌] (translated; my darling)
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alasy · 2 years
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You'll never read this but thank you Guilherme for being so kind and helping me out, you saved the day
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extra-joker-mush · 2 months
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this is a list of palestinian fundraisers as well as a brief description i wrote of each person's situation
!! DISCLAIMER !! I am not qualified to vet campaigns, I only compile them. I will include the account that has verified each campaign in its respective description, and if they are not vetted, I will add a disclaimer. Always donate at your own discretion.
@motaz345: Mohamed Jadalhaq from Sweden is organizing this campaign on behalf of his brother Motaz in order to raise enough funds to evacuate him and his family from Gaza. Motaz is himself a nurse by trade, while his wife Fedaa is a pediatrician. They have three children together, Mohammed (9), Omar (7), and Nima (4). Motaz and Fedaa both volunteer at a local hospital, however they make no stable income because both their home and place of work were destroyed by bombings. Because they are constantly forced to relocate, they can have no stable source of income or basic necessities such as food and clean water. This family’s gofundme has raised 36,000 krona (~$3,500 USD) of their goal which is 250,000 krona (~$25,000 USD). This will cover basic necessities for the family of five and hopefully evacuation fees as well. This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@burningnightgiver: Sahar, Mother separated from her children, who are currently trapped in Gaza. Her daughter Walaa suffers from type 1 diabetes and does not have access to insulin due to the genocide. Sahar’s gofundme has raised $11,000 of the $50,000 she requires to evacuate her children and be reunited with them in Egypt. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@yousefjehad0: Youssef (19) currently sheltering in a tent at a displacement camp in Deir al-Balah. Responsible for his family’s livelihood as well as paying for his father’s medical treatment. His younger brother is suffering from hepatitis due to poor living conditions caused by the genocide and requires medicine. Youssef is malnourished because all the income he makes goes towards his family’s medical expenses, and he has been stripped of his education after having his school bombed by the Israeli army. His gofundme has only raised $5,000 of the $15,000 he needs. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost, @aces-and-angels, and @el-shab-hussein.
@mohammadyaser1980: Mohammad, father of five children who have lost their home and education due to the genocide in Gaza. His mother has also passed away due to poor living conditions and lack of access to medical care. His gofundme has raised $20,000 of the $35,000 he needs to help support his family. This campaign is being orchestrated by Mohammad’s nephew, Roba Ayyad.
@ahmed4palestine: Ahmed (22), formerly a biomechanics major at Al-Azhar University in Gaza, before it was destroyed by the Israeli army. He was stripped of his education a year before he was supposed to graduate and his father Amjad lost his shop, effectively his family’s source of income. His gofundme has raised $17,000 of the $20,000 he requires to support his family of seven (Lamar, his youngest sister, hopes to one day be a doctor), who are currently sheltering in Deir al Balah after having been displaced. The $20,000 will cover evacuation tickets ($5,000 per adult & $2,500 per child), bus transportation from the border to Cairo, and an Egyptian Visa. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@alhabil: Mohammad (30), husband and father of three–Ahmed (8), Osama (6), and Mira (4). He supports his parents and pays for their medical expenses; his father Marwan Al-Habil (65) suffers from diabetes and hypertension, and his mother (55) is in extremely poor health (diabetes, high blood pressure, a herniated disc, and osteoporosis) due to lack of treatment. Mohammad’s family was displaced to Rafah and then later Nuseirat, which is still not safe. His gofundme has raised $27,000 of his $50,000 goal, and has been vetted by @90-ghost and @el-shab-hussein.
@hayanahed: Haya and her family of eight, who have been displaced after having their home bombed by the Israeli army. Both Haya and her sister Amal suffer from severe medication allergies and fear that with growing disease in displacement camps they will not have access to adequate medical care. Her father’s business of 28 years was completely destroyed in a bombing last year, reducing their family’s income to nothing. Before their workplaces and home were entirely destroyed, Haya and her siblings consisted of three talented programmers and one graphic designer. Haya’s youngest sister studied at the College of Architecture and is an aspiring architect. Haya’s siblings are also separated from her brother, who is currently living in Belgium. Her gofundme has raised $83,000 of $100,000, which will cover her entire family’s fees to enter Egypt (5k per person, 35k for their seven family members), passport fees ( €135 per person, €945 for seven family members), and minimum living costs (€1,700 per month, €10,200 total). This fundraiser has been vetted by operation olive branch and project watermelon.
@momenalostaz: Momen (24) requires support for his family of ten living in Gaza. His father is battling heart disease and cannot cover medical expenses, while the children in his family are subjected to malnourishment and disease. You can read more about his family on his gofundme page, which has raised $22,000 of the $70,000 that his family requires to cover the evacuation fees as well as basic necessities living in Cairo. This fundraiser has been vetted by @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi.
@karamrafeek: Karam (23) aspiring software engineer before his university was destroyed. Taking care of his sick mother, Karam’s gofundme has raised $13,000 of the $20,000 he needs, which will cover evacuation fees ($5,000 per person, $10,000 total), the cost of his mother’s treatment ($3,000), the cost of completing his education ($3,000) and cost of living in Egypt ($4,000). This campaign has been vetted by @nabulsi, @rainbowywitch, and @gazagfmboost (as well as by Project Watermelon).
@asmaayyad: Asmaa (25) and her family of eight who have been forced to evacuate their home. Their kitten, Timur, passed away due to the harsh conditions caused by the genocide. Asmaa’s brothers can no longer provide their family with income and her family has been deprived of basic necessities. Asmaa’s gofundme has only raised $15,000 of the $45,000 she needs, which will cover evacuation fees for her family ($5,000 per adult and $2,500 per child). This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost and @aces-and-angels.
@adham-89: Yousef’s nieces Kareem and Carmen are in need of evacuation from Gaza. Their mother was killed after their house was bombed, and their uncle Yousef is orchestrating the campaign to evacuate the twins from America. The twins, as well as Yousef’s parents and sisters, are sheltering in tents in southern Gaza. Their gofundme has raised $11,000 of the $50,000 they need, which will cover evacuation fees for all six family members. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@mahmoud1995: Mahmoud, his fiancé Sujood, his brother, his sister in law and his nephew Yasser are sheltering in tents in southern Gaza after having their home bombed in November. Their gofundme has raised $13,000 of their $50,000 goal, which will cover evacuation fees so the five of them may cross the border into Egypt. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@shimaashaban22: Abdel (26) and his wife Shaima (22) as well as their daughter Juri (2) have been displaced from their bombed home in northern Gaza to a refugee camp in Deir Al-Balah, where they live in a small tent. This family’s gofundme has raised $11,000 of their $50,000 goal. This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@m0hammed1: Mohammed (23), formerly studying for a Master's in Business Administration, is responsible for his family of five; his mother Raja (51), father Hussein (58) and younger sisters Iman (18) and Noor (13). His father was injured by the bombings that struck their home, and Iman has contracted hepatitis due to unsanitary living conditions caused by the genocide. The family is displaced and sheltering in Deir al-Balah, where they suffer from disease and lack of access to food, water, and basic shelter. Their gofundme has raised $9,000 of the $25,000 they need, and has been vetted by @90-ghost and @ibtisams.
@mohammed-atallah: Muhammad (17) was shot by an Israeli soldier with an explosive bullet on 2/25/24 whilst carrying aid from the Nabulsi roundabout in southwest Gaza. He was shot on his left hand and requires a bone graft, which he cannot get in Gaza. His father also requires constant medical supervision which is insufficient in their current situation. Muhammad’s gofundme has raised $14,000 of the $82,000 goal, which will cover the cost of his bone graft as well as rebuilding the house of Muhammad, his parents (Sobhi and Alaa) his siblings (Iman, Amani, Alaa, Suja, Rahaf, Retaj, and Ahmed) as well as his niece and nephew (Malak and Amir). This campaign is being orchestrated by Haruka Aoki on behalf of Muhammad and has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@emanzaqoutt: Eman, biotechnologist, wife of Mahmoud Zaqout (39) and mother of two children, Rakan (12) and Seba (10). Before the Israeli army attacked her workplace, Eman conducted scientific research and worked as a biotech specialist at Al-Shifa Hospital and Turkish Palestinian Friendship Hospital serving cancer patients. After having her home destroyed by the Israeli army, Eman’s family was forced to move south and is currently sheltering in a displacement camp with inhumane living conditions. Her gofundme has raised $24,000 of her $40,000 goal and has been vetted by @90-ghost.
Salem (26): Unfortunately I can’t find his tumblr account, but I still have his gofundme link. Salem is a husband to Hadeel (25) and a father of two children, Laila (5) and Bakr (five months), who you can see pictures of on his gofundme page. After having their home destroyed, Salem and his family have been displaced and forced to move over ten times in search of safety, suffering under inhumane and severely unsanitary conditions that threaten the lives of himself, his wife and young children, one of whom is an infant. His daughter Laila has been stripped of her education and they suffer from extreme hunger, dehydration and stress. His fundraiser has raised $6,000 of their $38,000 goal, which will cover the cost of travel for Salem and his wife (around $14,000 total), as well as for his two children (around $5,000 total) and cost of living after evacuation (around $500 per month).
@mahmoudswierh2: (gofundme of the AlBalawi family) Formerly a talented graphic designer, Mahmoud is supporting his five siblings, as well as five nieces and nephews. Both of his parents are suffering from chronic health issues (detailed in his gfm description) and do not have access to the appropriate medication and care. The family’s home in Nuseirat was destroyed in a bombing and they were displaced. Moving to Egypt for their safety is their only choice, despite how painful it is to abandon their home. Mahmoud has raised $38,000 of his $50,000 goal, which will cover evacuation funds for the family (5k-8k per person).
@ashraf-family2: Ashraf (30) and his wife (Widad Isaa) and son (Bakr), originally from Al-Shuja’iya, where Ashraf owned a chicken farm to support his family. The Israeli army destroyed the family’s home and source of income. Their son Bakr in particular is subjected to harsh and inhumane conditions such as malnutrition and dehydration, in a constant state of stress. Ashraf’s gofundme has raised $20,000 of their $25,000 goal, and has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@musababed: Musab (22), formerly a biotech engineering student at Al-Azhar university. His home and university were destroyed by the Israeli army, who also murdered some of his family members and stripped him of his education. Musab’s gofundme has raised $5,000 of his $8,000 goal, which will go towards basic necessities and shelter for his family as well as his continued engineering studies and rebuilding the lives of his family. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@waseem4gaza: Waseem (34), his wife Amal (37) and their son Qais (3) have been forced by the Israeli army (who also martyred many of their family members) to evacuate their home in Gaza, and they are seeking to evacuate to Egypt. This family’s gofundme has raised $3,000 and is aiming for $15,000, which will cover evacuation fees. This campaign has been vetted by @mohammedalanqer.
@asmaamajed2: Asmaa (19) computer engineering student has lost her home, and means of income due to her father’s shop also being destroyed by the bombing. Her university was destroyed by the Israeli army as well, so she can’t continue her education. Asmaa’s gofundme has only raised $9,000 of the $50,000 she needs to evacuate her family and continue her education. This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@farahh2003: Farah (20) and her family have been displaced and are currently sheltering in tents in Al-Zawaida. Her grandfather, uncle, and cousins were killed in the bombing that destroyed her home, and her grandmother was gravely injured. Formerly a computer engineering student, Farah’s education has been halted by her university’s destruction by the Israeli army. She and her family are living in inhumane conditions, without access to clean water or appropriate food. Farah’s gofundme has raised $2,000 of the $50,000 she needs to evacuate her family. This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost, @el-shab-hussein, and @northgazaupdates.
@abdullahgaza: Abdullah (21) and five other siblings of the Alhabil family (as well as their parents) have been displaced after having their home destroyed by the Israeli army. Formerly a graphic designer, Abdullah can no longer work as his laptop was destroyed in the bombing. Sheltering in tents with many relatives, the family suffers from poor living conditions, and Abdullah’s father desperately needs to be evacuated as he requires urgent catheterization surgery due to chronic heart disease and hypertension. Abdullah’s gofundme has raised $82,000 of his $120,000 goal, which will go towards evacuating his family into Egypt. This campaign has been vetted and is listed as #81 on the Operation Olive Branch master list.
@ghaziyounes1967: Ghazi and his family have been evacuated to Egypt, but unfortunately his aunt Alan (70) is still stranded in northern Gaza. Ghazi’s gofundme has only raised $4,000 of his $50,000 goal, which will go towards supporting his aunt’s life while trapped in Gaza and hopefully her eventual evacuation. This campaign ahs been vetted by @90-ghost.
@mazenmanal: This campaign is being organized by Feras Al-Mansi on behalf of his family (aunt and cousins) in Gaza, who are suffering under inhumane living conditions. The children, who are suffering the effects of serious illness, lack access to appropriate treatment, and the family needs to be evacuated. Feras’ gofundme has raised only $3,000, which amounts to just over 3% of his goal. This money will go towards not only evacuating all of his extended family members from Gaza, but also covering the medical expenses for the children, who are in poor health. It will ensure their nutritional needs are met, that they have regular medical visits and that they are psychologically supported. This campaign has been vetted by @apollos-olives, however, Feras’ account is continually getting banned for no discernible reason which is hurting the campaigns credibility and thereby slowing the rate of donations, so it’s important to emphasize and boost this campaign in particular.
@saveyouseffamily: Youssef’s son Majd suffers from severe respiratory issues that require treatment which he cannot receive in Gaza and needs to be evacuated. Youssef, his wife and child have been forced to flee their home and are currently sheltering in a displacement camp in Rafah. Youssef’s gofundme has raised $8,000 of his $20,000 goal, which will go towards evacuating the family, covering basic cost of living and providing Majd with the necessary medical care. This campaign is #406 on the butterfly effect project spreadsheet and has also been vetted by @90-ghost.
@rehamoyasir: Reham (23) is a Gazan nurse who was aiming for her bachelor’s, however, her university being destroyed by the Israeli army has halted her education. Her family has also been displaced and is living under inhumane conditions. Reham’s gofundme has raised $3,000 of her $40,000 goal, which will go towards the cost of evacuation for her family of eight ($5,000 per person). This fundraiser has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@anqar: Abdelrahman (22) is pursuing a future in multimedia tech to support his mother. His father passed away due to COVID-19 when he was 18. Abdelrahman’s home, school, and job were destroyed by the bombings and he has been separated from his family, who have been forced to move south for their safety. This gofundme has raised $17,000 of their $20,000 goal, which will go towards relocating his family to a safe place and resuming Abdelrahman’s education. This campaign has been vetted by @el-shab-hussein and @90-ghost.
@ahmeadhilles: Ahmed and his family are currently sheltering in tents in an UNRWA school after having their home destroyed by the bombings. The conditions that they live under are inhumane and unsanitary. His father and son suffer from chronic health issues and lack access to appropriate care in Gaza. Ahmed’s gofundme has raised only $13,000 of his $80,000 goal, which will cover evacuation fees for his family of twenty ($5,000 per adult, $2,500 per child). This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@karemandohan1999: Kariman (25) teacher and wife of Ayman (30) business administration graduate employed as a fisherman due to conditions in Gaza. Their son, Hamoud, is one and a half years old. The family lives in Khan Yunis, where both their places of work have been damaged by bombings. After having been displaced several times, the family is currently sheltering in a tent where conditions are uncomfortable and inhumane. Hamoud is often sick because of the unsanitary environment and contaminated food/water. The family’s gofundme has only raised $7,000 of their $50,000 goal, and has been vetted by @90-ghost. They write; “It can be difficult to express the full picture of our suffering - words are inadequate.”
@mo-shamia: Mohammed, senior studying medicine in Gaza prior to his evacuation. His family of nine still remains in Gaza where their home has been destroyed and they are victim to the harsh climate and unsuitable conditions. Thankfully, due to donations Mohammed’s father was able to pay off his debts and provide food for their relatives (see photos on gfm), but Mohammed’s gofundme still needs to raise $8,000. This will go towards the cost of basic necessities (food and medication), for their relatives in Egypt (Mohammed, his cousins, brother in law and their kids), and Mohammed’s education (tuition costs around $3,000 for Palestinian expatriate students). This campaign has been vetted by @nabulsi and @el-shab-hussein and is listed as #7 on the Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraiser List, organized by the users mentioned.
@hazemsuhail: Hazem and his family (all of whom you can read about on his gofundme) of eight had their house destroyed by the Israeli army on the ninth of October, 2023. Hazem’s father passed away as a result of harsh conditions under the genocide. His brother, Samer, suffers from bipolar disorder that is exacerbated by the stressful conditions of genocide and his lack of medication. His feet were also injured in the initial bombing of their home. The children have had their safety, education, and joy stripped away. The market belonging to the family, their primary source of income, was also destroyed. Hazem’s gofundme has raised almost $5,000; his goal of $50,000 will cover the cost of evacuating and reestablishing the family in Egypt, where their life may resume in peace. This campaign has been verified as per the lists of @dlxxv-vetted-donations and @a-shade-of-blue. Hazem writes, “[your donation exemplifies] a shared belief in the sanctity of life and the right to a safe and peaceful existence”.
@waledps: Waled (34) engineer and father of three (Adam, Hala, Nay) is looking to evacuate his family. He was born in Gaza and the conditions under genocide have become insufferable, hence he is raising funds to evacuate his children to somewhere safe for them. You can donate to Waled either on buymeacoffee or paypal. His campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost.
@majedgaza1: Majed and his family were forced to flee to Egypt, physically and emotionally scarred from what they witnessed happen to their home. The genocide has halted their eldest’s employment and youngest’s education. The family is now raising funds to cover basic necessities and rent in Egypt, which has increased dramatically, making it difficult to find stable housing. The children also need support to continue their education, and their tuition is also very expensive. The family’s gofundme has raised only $2,000 of their $70,000 goal (DISCLAIMER: as of present this campaign is not vetted and Majed is having difficulty getting verified due to his being an expatriate. Although I have probable cause to believe this campaign is legit, I'm not qualified to vet fundraisers. Donate at your own discretion.)
@ayayassir: Aya (19) tech major in Gaza before her education was halted by the Israeli army destroying her university. Her laptop and means of income were also destroyed in the carnage. Her father (55) provides most of their basic necessities, but he is sick and requires care that is inaccessible to him. Aya’s campaign has only raised a startling $500 of her $100,000 goal, which will cover evacuation fees and help rebuild her family’s life (Aya, her father, brothers, and eight other individuals). You can donate to her gofundme to support this endeavor, which has been verified by @90-ghost, @el-shab-hussein, and @importantt-reblogs.
@amalashuor: Amal (26) formerly a university student studying French language before her school was destroyed by the Israeli occupation, wife and mother of Maryam (15 months). The family was forced to vacate their home in October and move south. Although they took temporary refuge in a friend’s home, they had been sheltering in a tent in Rafah since new years. Thanks to donations, they were able to move to Khan Yunis, however they were bombed there as well and forced to flee once again, sheltering in the east of Deir al-Balah. Prices have increased dramatically for transportation and basic necessities, detracting from the fund that will cover the family’s evacuation. For this reason, they’ve been forced to increase their fundraiser’s goal. Every time they are forced to relocate, it takes a percentage of their evacuation fund. Amal’s gofundme still needs to raise $18,000 to pay for necessities and eventually to cross the border. This campaign has been vetted and is listed as #175 on the donation spreadsheet.
@yaminfamily: Ahmed (35) husband of Dina and father of four (Zeina, Eileen, Yamen, and Ronza), the youngest of whom was born just four months ago amidst a genocide. Their home was destroyed by the bombings and they were forced to flee south, where they found no respite in either Nuseirat nor Deir al-Balah. Dina is pregnant and does not have access to appropriate care or monitoring, and the children have become ill frequently due to unsanitary and harsh conditions without the necessary treatments. The conditions living in tents are inhumane, and the family no longer has a source of income due to Ahmed’s place of work as an accountant being destroyed by the bombings. The family’s gofundme still needs to raise $4,000 more, which will go towards evacuation fees ($5000 per adult and $2500 per child), so Ahmed and Dina’s children can receive the education, treatment, and safety that they deserve. This campaign has been vetted by @sar-soor, @palipunk, and @fairuzfan.
@malak-3: Muhammad is Malak’s little brother, whom Malak is organizing this campaign for. He is still in Gaza, though his family was killed by the Israeli occupation. His foot was injured in the bombings, and his eyesight suffers. He was scheduled for ocular surgery in Egypt, however he doesn’t have the funds to cross the border and his eyesight is deteriorating. This gofundme has raised less than $100 at the time of posting. DISCLAIMER: this campaign has not been vetted by any reputable source. Malak contacted me and I am posting this in good faith, but I am not qualified to vet fundraisers. Donate at your own discretion.
@help--gaza4: Anas (18) university student living with his brother, younger sister, and parents. They have lost their home in the Shuja'iya area and source of income to the bombings. They have been forced to relocate many times, first to the Zawaydeh area and then to Deir al-Balah. They spent two months sheltering in Rafah, where conditions were the most dire and endured extreme hunger. The family has been once again forcibly relocated to ​​Deir al-Balah. This gofundme still needs to raise $5,000, and has been vetted by @nabulsi.
@mayadayyad81: Fadi (18) and his family from Al-Shujaiya have had their home destroyed by the Israeli army. They have moved south and are sheltering in a tent where they are not only vulnerable to bombings, but their living conditions are inhumane and unsanitary. As a highschooler, Fadi and his brothers have also been denied their education in the midst of this genocide and are seeking to take temporary refuge in Egypt where they may continue to pursue their dreams. Their father, an English teacher, is also no longer able to teach due to his institution being bombed (see pictures on Fadi’s page) and the family has lost their source of income. You can see pictures of the children in the family’s gofundme description. This campaign still needs to raise $12,000 to reach their $50,000 goal, which will go towards their evacuation fees ($5000 per person over 16 and $2500 per person under 16) and covering basic necessities. This campaign has been vetted by @nabulsi.
@bshaeromars-blog: Intisar and her seven children were forced to flee their home in October, which was destroyed by bombings. They first fled to central Gaza, but were then forced into Rafah as the assaults pressed southward. They are currently sheltering in a tent in extreme conditions without enough food. Intisar’s eldest daughter, Bshaer, had her husband martyred in December. Bshaer’s daughter Ayla was born just months ago, robbed of the opportunity to ever know her father, who was killed while trying to provide for his family. Ayla’s situation is particularly precarious, as newborns have delicate immune systems and Ayla doesn’t have access to the proper vaccinations, while conditions where the family shelters are unsanitary. This family’s gofundme still needs to raise $24,000 to reach their goal. This campaign has been vetted by @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi.
@mohmad77: Mohamed (minor) and his little brother Ahmed (see pictures on his page) have lost their home and had many of their relatives martyred by the Israeli occupation. Their gofundme is very new and has received less than $100 in donations. DISCLAIMER: this campaign is currently unvetted. Mohamed has sent me his documentation and I have probable cause to believe this campaign is legitimate, but as I’ve said before I am not qualified to vet fundraisers. I’m adding his campaign in good faith, donate at your own discretion.
@ghada-zaki: Ghada (23) won first place in the International Green Skills Competition from the EU Training Foundation, and is one of the first technicians in photovoltaic solar energy systems in Gaza. She is one of the most influential women in Palestine, but she has had her home and the privilege of graduation stolen from her by the Israeli occupation. Her dreams of starting a business in renewable energy have been put off by all the carnage that Israel has brought to her home. Ghada is the sole provider for a family of twelve, but the genocide has destroyed her job, meaning her family has no income. Her father (62) is still suffering from the effects of a car accident that occurred over a year ago and needs medical treatment that he can’t get in Gaza. Moreover, Ghada herself has hearing damage from her proximity to the bombings and requires invasive treatment that she simply can’t get in her circumstance. Her gofundme still needs to raise $17,000 to meet their goal, which will go towards basic necessities and hopefully cover evacuation fees for Ghada and her family. You can read about Ghada’s influence and accomplishments here and here. This campaign has been vetted by Bilal. 
@ahmadallouh32: Ahmad (34), father of two; Orhan (5) and Helena (4). Ahmad and his wife are both lawyers, however, they are unable to work due to the genocide; their home has been destroyed by the bombings that also killed Ahmad's brother, forcing them to relocate. They are sheltering in a tent and they struggle to support the children, as well as Ahmad’s father in law, who needs insulin urgently. This family’s gofundme is being organized by Ahmed’s sister in law, Kawthar, who is currently located in Spain. All funds generated from this fundraiser will go towards the family’s evacuation fees after the Rafah crossing is opened, so they may be safe again. They have currently raised less than $2,000 of their $50,000 goal. This campaign has been vetted by @el-shab-hussein.
@anasfamilys: Anas (17) suffering from type one diabetes and hypertension for many years, her health issues exacerbated by conditions in Gaza under Israeli bombardment. Her newborn niece is jaundiced and is suffering from malnutrition and unsanitary conditions for an infant. They have been sheltering in an UNRWA school since their farm was destroyed, however, it’s not a safe place to take refuge in the long term. Anas’ brother, grandparents, and all their children have been martyred by the IDF. Her brother (14), an aspiring photographer, was murdered by Israeli snipers just months ago while looking for food. Anas currently lives with her father, mother, five-year-old brother, eight-year-old sister, and two married sisters. This family’s gofundme has raised around 4% of their goal (€50.000), which will cover life saving necessities and hopefully help to rebuild their lives. DISCLAIMER: this campaign has been vetted by palilberation on tiktok and is listed as #25, however, I haven’t heard confirmation of the reliability of this project. Donate at your own discretion.
@supportmyfamily: Ahmed, dental technician, husband and father of three. The family has been displaced many times from their home in Tel-Alhawa; first to a school in al-Magazi, then to Rafah and then to Deir al-Balah. The family is sheltering in tents without access to basic necessities, electricity, and sanitation. The intense heat has caused them to develop health issues and they struggle with hepatitis B as well, given the unsanitary conditions. Ahmed’s campaign is to support four separate families including his own, those of Moatasem’s family, Mohamed, and Ahmed’s elderly parents and their eight children. Ahmed’s parents both suffer from cardiac issues and require treatment, as well as his newphew Qusay who suffers from severe and prolonged health issues that affect his ability to speak. He requires speech therapy and psychological treatment that he does not have access to in Gaza. You can see documentation of the family on Ahmed’s gofundme, which has raised less than $100 thus far. This campaign has been vetted by @moayesh.
@hind3en: Hind, mother to Zeina (4) and Ahmed (2) has fled to Egypt with her children but tragically still needs to evacuate her husband, who is still trapped in Gaza. Both Hind and her husband worked at Al-Shifa hospital, where she was a physical therapist and worked in the ICU during the fall of last year to help victims of the bombings. Her husband, Dr. Islam, is a trained plastic surgeon and also operated on many victims. They were forced to flee the hospital on November 10th to the south of Wadi Gaza. It took hours to arrive at an UNRWA school in Khan Yunis, however, they were forced by the Israeli army to relocate again after just one month. They sheltered in tents in Rafah for four months. They dealt with hepatitis A due to unsanitary conditions and lacked access to basic necessities such as clean water, food, and electricity. Hind and the kids were eventually forced to spend all their savings to cross the border from Rafah into Egypt after hearing of the Israeli’s plans to move southward. The emigration cost them $10,000 collectively, however, Hind’s husband Islam refused to leave out of obligation to serve the injured still in Gaza. The children are left to reconcile with the loss of their newly built home and cruel separation from their father. The family’s gofundme has raised less than $500 and has been verified by @rhq2744, who also knows Dr. Islam personally.
@waledps: Waled (34) an engineer and father of three (Adam, Hla, Nay). He is looking to evacuate himself and his children from the inhumane conditions in Gaza, in his hometown. His wife is also expecting, and they are struggling to cover her financial needs with the delivery date approaching. You can donate to Waled on his buymeacoffee or paypal; this campaign is vetted by @90-ghost.
@aymanbsil: Osama, Gazan web developer, has had his home and workplace destroyed by the Israeli armed assaults that have occurred over the past year. This has destroyed his source of income and thereby his ability to provide for his family. It has also prevented him from pursuing his masters and martyred many people in his family and larger community. Osama has been sheltering in a tent in Rafah for several months alongside his family, where conditions are harsh and unsustainable. Osama’s gofundme has thus far raised $2,000 of his $15,000 goal, which will go towards rebuilding his office, his continued education, and supporting his family throughout this hardship. This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost and is listed on this spreadsheet of vetted Gazan fundraisers.
@safaabed8: Safaa (25) wife and mother of two (Ibtisam and Ibrahim). Originally from al-Karama, Safaa’s home was destroyed and the family was forced to relocate to Nuseirat, where they sheltered in a tent for a time. They took temporary refuge in Rafah, but were inevitably displaced once again. Since they have lost power, they have converted electric ovens into wood ovens just to heat bread. Their lungs are damaged from the excessive smoke, and they are forced to burn their hands just to be able to eat. The destruction of their home, assuring that they may never return to where it once stood, incurs a feeling of indescribable loss. It represents the loss of a peaceful life, before tragedy overtook the lives of millions of Palestinians, more than just a physical place. Safaa’s gofundme still needs to raise $60,000 to cover their evacuation fees as well as rent and other expenses after the family’s relocation, so the children may grow up in a place of safety and peace. This campaign has been vetted by @90-ghost and @nabulsi.
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redflagshipwriter · 4 months
Text
Hot Ghouls in your Area 9
masterpost
“Good morning!”
Jason winced and moved the phone a little further from his face. “Is this Doctor Fenton?” 
“It's one of them! What can I do ya for?” Jack Fenton boomed, just as bombastic as his newsletter made him seem. Jason knew, deep in his heart, that Jack Fenton was indeed the one who had selected green neon bold for his headings and borders. 
Angels wept. Jason scrubbed his palm over his eye. This man had no poetry in his soul. “I, uh, had some questions about a ghost. I've read some of your articles and your most recent published paper on the topic.”
“We love ghosts!” Fenton bellowed. “Ask away!”
“Do you know a ghost called Phantom?” Jason tried.
“...Sure do,” Jack Fenton said. “Whatcha need?” 
Jason cleared his throat. “It's somewhat complicated,” he said evasively, because he didn't need these people to know he was the Red Hood. Fuck. He should have either gotten his helmet stored away or not given his real name. Phantom knew his face and that his name was Jason. Any information that got around via Phantom might tie his face to his alter ego. If Phantom said he got married to Jason, the Red Hood, that could lead to the end of the Bat family vigilantism.
“...He cause you trouble, sport?”
Jason let out a slight laugh. “You could say that, though it wasn't really his fault,” he admitted. He cast a paranoid eye out the window to be sure no siblings were creeping on him. “No, it's really more that…” Fuck, he should have planned this better. “Is there any information you can give me about how a human could contact him?” 
Not that Jason didn't have a phone number for the guy. But it made him very uncomfortable to have any basic knowledge or way to track Phantom down if he decided to leave Jason to whatever was going on. 
“I could probably do that,” Jack Fenton said slowly, now sounding like an entirely different human being. “Say, you wouldn't be Jeremy, would you?”
Jason blinked. “...How did you know?” He went with. Phantom had contact with a human guy named Jeremy? That might be his in.
“Oh, well then, you've definitely got to come over,” Dr. Fenton wheedled. It somehow came across as shifty. “You'll be wanting a whole primer on how the Ghost Zone works, won't ya?” 
“That would be immensely helpful,” Jason agreed. “But I'd hate to take up your valuable time.”
“Nonsense!” Fenton bellowed. Jason nearly lost his grip on his phone in surprise. “Come over Jeremy, I'm dying to meetcha!” 
So, there was a plan. Jason packed for a day trip and dialed up his travel agent. 
“Fuck off,” said Tim. “I'm busy. Christ.” 
“I need an airplane ticket and a rental bike to Illinois,” Jason continued. He tossed his mostly full bag on the sofa and went digging for the socks he knew he had washed the other night. “I'm going to go see some nerds about my impromptu adventure the other day.”
Tim groaned. That was the first Jason had given any hint at all about what had happened to him when he'd been ‘sacrificed.’ “What nerds?” He asked wearily. 
Jason grinned into his sock drawer. Gottem. “Why, do you all know each other?” He asked blithely. 
“Do you always antagonize people you want favors from?” Tim whined. A keyboard clacked rapidly in the background. “Jason, I swear to God, you massive bitch. Cut the crap and communicate, or I'm hanging up.” 
Jason frowned at his socks and grabbed a random pair. “You don't gotta be like that,” he said sulkily. He slammed the socks into his bag with a very unsatisfying silence. “So, the ritual doohickey sent me to the infinite underworld, I met a guy there actually and we are magically connected because he's who that dumb ritual matched me up to. He doesn't want to be stuck with a human so we are on the same page about breaking this. We started looking for answers and he took me back to Earth since it's not good for humans to be in the green dimension for too long.” 
There was silence from the other end of the line for a few seconds. “You're fucking lying,” Tim said. 
“Only by leaving things out.” A bit stung, Jason pulled a hand through his hair and accidentally ruined his good hair day. 
“What are you leaving out?” Tim rejoined swiftly.
Jason laughed at him. “You think you're getting that kinda information in exchange for plane tickets?” He asked incredulously. 
“You are the most annoying person who has ever tried to kill me.”
Ouch. That genuinely stung.
“Fuck off.” Jason slammed the drawers shut. 
“I could guess aliens or supernatural off of what you just said.” Tim ignored Jason’s very good point. “Based off of your trip to the Gotham U campus and-”
“Are you still stalking me?” Jason cut him off, incredulous. He scoffed. “Little buddy, you already got my pixie boots, Red Robin costume, and my Dad. What else do you wanna take from me?”
“I think that you were there to assess Daniel Fenton,” Tim ignored him.
Jason was silent for a moment. There was probably no point in pretending that Tim was wrong. “You already knew about the Fenton’s connection to the supernatural.” He was suddenly tired.
“His older sister is an intern at Arkham, she stepped out of line to get a chance to talk to Jeremy Waters.” Tim didn’t seem to notice that the mood had changed. He was caught up on whatever twenty level plan was whirring away internally.
Jason looked at the wall for a moment, not bothering to think about why that name was familiar. “...and that is…?”
“The guy who kidnapped you, keep up,” Tim snarked. “Her supervisor guessed what she was hinting at, shut her down, put a note about it in the private server so there was a paper trail if she turns out to be a collaborator.”
““Private” is a strong word to describe that server.” Jason rubbed at his jawline and hefted his bag out to the bathroom to gather his shaving kit. 
“Mmhm,” Tim said blandly. “I bugged her phone. The signal is absurdly bad, unexplainably bad. She doesn’t send a lot of messages, but she had a very suspicious call with Daniel Fenton where, among other things, she hinted she had inside knowledge regarding some kind of local mystery, possibly criminal activity. Her brother accused her of supporting crime.”
Jason groaned. “I’m going to interview their parents.” He checked that the razor blades were stowed away correctly before snapping shut the travel case. Then he noticed that his bathroom mirror could use a wipedown. He left his bag for a moment to dig for the cleaner.
“Probably for the best,” Tim said, definitely misunderstanding his purpose. “They seem…” He trailed off when he couldn’t find an appropriate adjective.
“You should read a book,” Jason said, because he saw an opportunity to be an asshole. “Anyway, I wanna get out to the area tonight and see them in the morning. What’s my flight?” He spritzed the glass and watched his reflection blur. It was oddly comforting to not have to stare at his green eyes.
‘That ghost zone was the same green as the Lazarus Pits,’ Jason thought dully. He didn’t really want to think about it. But he had a pretty good idea why he hadn’t had the reaction to the place that Danny expected a human to have.
“Kon could take you,” Tim said sweetly, which was basically a death threat. It was enough to jar him back to the real world. Kon was still not feeling chill about the Titans Tower scuffle. It probably wasn’t good for him to be so petty, but Jason was not going to be the one to tell baby Superdork that.
Jason winced. “I was thinking more like United.”
Tim snickered. 
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jgracie · 4 months
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THE MONSTER’S GONE, HE’S ON THE RUN AND YOUR DADDY’S HERE
masterlist | rules
in which jason is a hero in more ways than one
pairings jason grace x fem!reader
warnings reader is afab/can get pregnant
on the radio . . . beautiful boy (darling boy) (john lennon)
an my blog has become baby fever central so naturally i had to deliver 🫡, shoutout to anya ( @puffoz ) for helping me name the eldest grace daughter <3
The night after you told Jason you were pregnant with your first child, you’d woken up to the sound of sniffles coming from a certain someone sleeping right next to you. At first, you were confused - Jason had been ecstatic a few hours ago when you broke the news to him, why was he crying now? Then it hit you.
He was scared.
Jason Grace, son of Jupiter, champion of Hera, ex-praetor of Camp Jupiter, Pontifex Maximus and so many other titles you never cared for, was scared. Tenderly, you’d coaxed him out of the ball shape he was currently in (arms wrapped around his knees, head sitting in between his legs) and asked what was wrong, even though you already had an inkling of an idea as to what the matter was.
When he didn’t answer, you didn’t ask again. Knowing Jason like the palm of your hand meant staying silent and waiting for him to be ready to tell you, as expressing and talking about his emotions has been a struggle he only recently began to deal with.
With your hand gently rubbing his back, Jason replied, his voice barely above a whisper, “do you think I’ll be a bad dad?” Only after the question left his lips did Jason make eye contact with you, his eyes glistening with the tears they once held. 
Anyone who grew up the way Jason did would naturally have their doubts about their parental abilities: how was he supposed to take care of a baby when he didn’t even know what it was like to be taken care of as a baby? However, you knew the truth.
“No,” you said. It was a simple answer, full of certainty and confidence, “no, Jason, I don’t think you’ll be a bad father. In fact, I know you’ll be a good one. You aren’t your upbringing - you’re kind, caring and hold so much love in your heart for everyone and everything around you despite the circumstances the Fates put you through. Trust me when I say you’ll be the best dad.”
You were, of course, right. Despite all the hardships that come with pregnancy, yours was a breeze thanks to Jason. Throughout the entirety of the nine months you spent carrying your child, he was nothing but supportive. He’d always buy you whatever food you were craving at whatever time (no matter how strange it was), he’d give you massages, he’d comfort you when you were feeling down and so much more.
The next time Jason cried was in the hospital when your baby had arrived. Natalia June Grace was born at 9:47AM and was everything you wished for and more. As Jason stared into her eyes, the eyes she’d inherited from him, he was filled to the brim with conviction: he was going to be the best dad he could possibly be for his precious Talia.
Despite this, Jason would be lying if he said he didn’t have his hard times. He’d be lying if he said he never woke up in the middle of the night, sweaty as he reached for his glasses and reminded himself that the nightmares aren’t real, they don’t define him, he is not Zeus, he is not Jupiter, he is Jason.
Being Jason meant being an excellent father. In Natalia's eyes, Jason hung the moon and the stars - no one could compare to her father. They had a bond like no other and were inseparable from the minute they met. Everywhere Talia went, Jason followed. Dance recital? He had front row tickets and lots of storage on his phone to film every second of it. Impromptu tea party with her barbies? Jason was there, clad in a tutu as he poured invisible tea into their cups. To you, the fact that Natalia viewed him as her hero was no surprise. Jason, however, tended to need some reminding.
“Mommy!” You heard your daughter yell as soon as she and Jason made their way inside your cozy apartment. While your husband locked the door, your daughter ran to the kitchen and gave you a bone crushing hug. Immediately, you let go of the whisk you were holding and hugged back, unable to believe it was now almost six years since she had been born. Time flies when you’re having fun!
Running your fingers through her hair, you said, “Talia, how was school today? I really missed you!” She replied with a quick ‘good’ before going to sit on the dining table, princess themed bag clutched tightly in her little hands as she yapped to you about everything that had happened at school that day. You smiled, admiring the way your daughter managed to breathe life into the most mundane things.
Just as she was beginning to tell you about her current crush, Mikey, and how he shared his KitKat with her during lunch, Jason appeared, bouquet of flowers in hand as he took your own and pressed a kiss onto the back of it.
“Hi honey, I missed you loads today. Got you these ‘cause I noticed the others started wilting,” your smile widened at this gesture: only your husband would be paying that much attention to the flowers scattered around the house. You gave him a peck on the lips before taking the bouquet from him and going to place it in a vase. While you were doing so, you could hear Jason and Natalia having a conversation.
“Do you want me to put your bag in your room, baby?” He asked.
“No thank you daddy, I wanna show you and mommy something first,” she replied. Then, turning around, she yelled, “mommy, come! I wanna show you and daddy what I did at school today!” 
You obliged, and you and Jason watched as she rummaged in her school bag before pulling out a single piece of paper and handing it to you. On it, in big bold letters, was the title, ‘My Hero’.
“Read it so daddy can know too!” She squealed, nearly jumping out of her seat in excitement. You stared at the picture of a tall, blond man and a little girl in pigtails she’d drawn to accompany the paragraph she’d written on this topic and felt your heart swell with warmth.
Glancing at Jason for a second, you read, “my hero is my daddy. He is my hero because he always plays with me and gets rid of the monsters under the bed when I go to sleep. I love my daddy very much.”
After you’d finished reading, Natalia looked up at Jason expectantly, a big smile plastered on her face as she waited to hear his reaction. However, her smile dropped when she saw tears roll down his cheeks.
Now pouting, she turned to you for answers, “why is daddy sad?” 
You smiled, delicately cupping her face in your palm, “daddy’s not sad, babes, he’s actually really happy. Sometimes, when people are super happy, they cry. Your worksheet means a lot to him, he’s very touched,” at your words, she brightened up.
Natalia then took the paper from you and gave it to Jason, “you can hang it on your wall, daddy, since you like it so much!” She proceeded to give him a peck on the cheek and ran off to her room, not fully understanding exactly how much her simple worksheet meant to Jason.
That was the third time Jason cried: when he realised he wasn’t his upbringing, or Zeus, or Jupiter, or any of the other monsters that lived under his own bed. He was Jason - a great, loving father who put his family above all and was a hero in more ways than one.
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successfulgoddess333 · 5 months
Text
MY LONG AWAITED SUCCESS STORY PLUS RANT/YALL NEED THIS STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND READ
First things first
I’m tired of being nice
I have took time out of MY day to help you guys
EVERY DAY
I have given tips methods
Advice answered questions
Replied to countless amounts of DMs
Etc etc I’m not providing false hope here I AM trying to help you guys
I’m getting so many different suggestions and asks
Let me say this
STOP
from now on
No more questions
If it’s urgent
Like you really wanna know something
DM me
I WILL respond
No more questions asking how to enter the void
My account is literally talking about HOW TO ENTER THE VOID STATE
Are instructions not clear?????
Get off your butt and fucking do it!!!!
Stop procrastinating stop being lazy stop asking questions you spreads know the answers to
And for the love of God
STOP ASKING ME TO ENTER FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!
I’m doing what I can to help you all manifest
But it’s YOUR job to make it happen
Y’all used my kindness against me and it’s pissing me off I’m tired of people not even asking anymore
Just begging me
I AM NOT A MAGICIAN
I was literally YOU
not too long ago
I am a nice person but I am at my limits
Stop repeating questions
Look at my page for the answers you need
Stop asking me to enter for you
If it’s not happening
DM me for ADVICE
I used to be the kid that got asked by others to do their homework for them
If I didn’t put my foot down
Y’all were gonna drive me insane
Literally
I love y’all but stop depending on me
Just ask
For advice
But stop treating me like a Genie
And I manifested for someone and it doesn’t work
Then what
Am I a liar now???
Am I fake??
Like are you serious
Bruh I’m serious when I say
I’ve had enough
Read this story to see how YOU CAN ALSO
Transform your life
I literally went from
TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️
I went from slitting my own wrists and going in my closet trying to hang myself EVERY FUCKING NIGHT
I used to stare in the mirror
Crying about how my body looked
I used to go to school scared because I was getting abused by guys there and bullied by girls
All my friends turned their backs on me and I literally said
FUCK IT
I don’t deserve this fucking life so you know what I did????
I changed it
It’s so easy it’s insane
I too over complicated it
I too was desperate
But your desires are yours
They just are
Ignore them MF negative thoughts
Matter of a fact don’t even call it that
You are giving your “intrusive” thoughts power by saying they are negative
Don’t label them as intrusive thoughts
THEY DO NOT EXIST
THEY WILL NEVER MANIFEST
And I’m not just saying that it’s true
It’s soooo fucking true
By labeling them as “intrusive” or “negative” you’re giving them power
To take over and control your life
When this is not what you want
Don’t fear your own head
Bitch it’s YOUR BRAIN
It can’t NOT listen to you
Change your goddamn assumptions
You are a bad bitch you’re hot beautiful
You’re THAT bitch
Bad bitches don’t beg we make shit happen
Get off your cute ass and go get your dream fucking life
Bitch you can have it all
You can marry Shawn Mendez
Be the sexiest model on the planet (but you’re only 5’3) OK ANDDDDD
Marissa Rose is the first 4’11 runway model
You mean to tell me it’s not possible???
They have plus size models
Shirt models
Models with tig ol biddies
Models with tattoos models with piercings models with scars etc
ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE
You can get a call back from that job
Better yet fuck 9 to 5s
Bitch YOU ARE RICH
You are literally Jeff Bezos
Don’t manifest “small shit” cuz if you can get an apartment and a job
You can also manifest $100 million and 2500 square feet mansion
You can have superpowers
You can be a master manifestor
You can become a celebrity and overnight
You can meet your favorite celebrities at awards shows
You can sit next to Ice Spice at the Grammys
EVEN SHE MANIFESTED HER DREAM LIFE
There’s proof in her old tweets and in your interviews
YOU CAN HAVE HARRY STYLES TICKETS FOR WHENEVER HE DECIDES TO DROP AN ALBUM
YOU CAN BE THE NEXT BEYONCÉ
YOU CAN MEET OR EVEN PERFORM WITH TAYLOR SWIFT
YOU CAN HAVE ALL THE MONEY YOU WANT
YOU CAN SHIFT TO ANOTHER REALITY AND MEET MICHAEL JACKSON
YOU CAN HAVE THE SINGING VOICE OF AALIYAH OR MF MARIAH CAREY
YOU CAN MANIFEST THAT YOUR DOG NEVER DIED OR THAT
YOUR EX STILL MISSES YOU
KANYE WEST MANIFESTED KIM K
TOM HOLLAND MANIFESTED ZENDAYA
YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOU CANT HAVE
MICHAEL B JORDAN WAITING ON YOU HAND AND FOOT????
YOU CAN ENTER THE VOID MANIFEST YOUR Sp
AND WAKE UP NEXT TO YOUR CRUSH
YOU CAN MANIFEST BEING IMMUNE TO BAD SHIT BEING A GODDESS BEING SO BEAUTIFUL THAT PEOPLE FORGET MEGAN FOX EXISTS
YOU CAN MANIFEST LOOKING LIKE MARILYN MONROE
OR MADISON BEER
YOU CAN MANIFEST TALENT
BITCH ITS ALL POSSIBLE
You OWN THIS SHIT THIS IS YOUR LIFE BOO
Go fucking get it!!!!!!!
SUCCESS STORY
I was tired of own shit so I used the method that I created
I already posted it
Go read it
Here’s what I manifested
1. SP
I manifested a girlfriend because I’m bisexual asf
And I created her on my phone
Just write if list of what she looks and acts like
I manifested my dream career
I manifested platonic SPs
As in friendships
Money
A strong intuition
More knowledge
A better self concept
Immunity
The ability to hypnotize with my eyes(OK I HAVENT TESTED THIS OUT BUT IM EXCITED TO)
Meeting a celebrity
Can’t say who but I manifested it for the future
I even got pets now!!! A puppy two kittens and two snakes!!
I manifested lots of cool talents
I improved my dancing!!!!!!
I was insecure about my voice
So I changed it
Deadass I sound kinda sexy now
I wanted a whispery ass voice😭😭
So I got oneeee
I also manifested a LOT of personal stuff that I won’t share
Unfortunately I’m SUPER protective of my soul and just overall self
And I’m not posting a face reveal
This might seem surprising to most
My passive aggressive behavior but this is literally how I am daily
I really am nice but y’all just make me ANXIOUS
But still
I love you darlings soooo much
Like for real
But please just pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Don’t make me your wish granter
Make your own wishes come true
If it’s cool with y’all
I’ll manifest tonight
That entering the void will be easy for you guys
But you HAVE to do it yourself I can only guide you
You got this babe
If you got offended it’s working
That means you needed this
Take this tough love and go use it for good
I better see some goddamn success stories this month or we gon fight
(Not literally that’s just my humor talking)
Love you bitches
Now go meditate before I appear under your bed tonight and yank yo shit
Love youuuu💗💗💗💗💗
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ash-says · 6 months
Text
Things to be aware of as a Hopeless Romantic:
We all have been there daydreaming about the perfect man, the perfect life, the perfect whatever,etc. Still life is not full of roses and thorns are inevitable.
So here are some aspects to look out for according to me so that you won't fall in the delulu is the only solulu trap.
Remember if you follow me, we don't do regrets here. We accept, take accountability and move on. We don't soak ourselves in problems. We solve them effectively.
1) Drop those rose-colored glasses. Crush them under your feet and now look at the world again. Learn to accept reality. It is what it is. Not what you make it out to be. Learn to become an observer of your life from time to time. It will give you the real picture.
2) Potential is useless if you are not leveraging it. It's a trap both for yourself and others. You see potential in him of changing and being a good guy?? Girl, he *IS* not a good guy. It's not your job to raise a man. It's embarrassing. Stop babysitting grown men.
3) Standards are important but ensure they are not rooted in fantasy. Let's be honest finding a man who is rich, dark, tall, sexy and talks in the way you read in your romance novels is difficult. I am not saying it's impossible but don't be too rigid. All I will say is make sure you are also on the level where if you come across such a man he should be ready to date you.
4) Men view sex differently than us women. I know many of you will get triggered after reading this but the majority of men really view women as sex dolls. Blame the porn industry maybe. Good men exist but not every other man who talks sweetly is good.
5) A person in your life treats you nicely. Always talk sweetly, tells you that you matter to them but their actions don't match it. Chances are you are being breadcrumbed. Plans being cancelled? Messages being unseen? But when confronted all you get is,"Sorry love, I was busy. I was going to do it. You matter a lot,etc etc." Breadcrumbing. Be smart it can happen even in friendships too. I understand people get busier with time and things do happen. Use your discernment to see who really is busy and who is faking to be busy.
6) That uncle was so kind to me. He talked to me sweetly and always tried to help me out. Now, that's really sweet of him. Next he calls you home to help out with the household chores and he is alone at home because his wife is out of town for some work. Would you go and help? Yes. Will you go alone? No. That's unsafe.
No matter how much a gentleman a man appears to be you are not allowed to be in a situation where he could potentially take advantage of you. You always bring along a friend or deny it. I know it's wrong to not help someone but at your own risk. No. Never. It's common knowledge in our society.
7) Dreaming of a Prince Charming to whisk you away from all your troubles??? Dream on. The idea that a soulmate or one person will magically solve all our issues is dumb. We as human beings add to each other's happiness rather than becoming the core of it.
8) One of the biggest mistakes I have seen girls around me make is of being fully invested in a relationship to the point one small fight makes them depressed. That's codependency. It's unhealthy.
9) Never make your relationship your identity. You should always have a separate identity out of it. Stop curating yourself for your partners. Morphing yourself according to their likes and dislikes. That's one way ticket to an identity crisis after breakup. Compromises are essential but changing your core self??? Crazy shit.
10) Your relationship should not be the reason for your downfall. It happens especially with my intense girlies we invest so much of ourselves in the relationship to the point it becomes our focal point and when it faces upheavals we are devastated. The mental distress starts flowing in other areas of your life and suddenly your grades are falling, your career seems unstable, etc. Develop the emotional strength to compartmentalize your emotions and not allow them to overflow in other areas and affect them.
Imagination is fertile but being delusional is being stuck in a swamp.
That's all for today's show on ash-says. Stay tuned for more illegal tricks and explosive opinions.
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starillusion13 · 1 year
Text
Winning Dessert
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Pairing: boxer! San x f! reader x manager! Wooyoung
Genre: Strangers to lovers, Mature, SMUT
W.C: 6.3k +
Warnings: sexual themes,explicit SMUT, nipple play, oral (f receiving) , m x f x m, threesome, double penetration,unprotected sex(please don’t do irl),aftercare (please idk if anything more needed to add or not.)
Request from: @kitten4sannie
Network: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity
Thanks for helping me out to come up with an idea with woosan fic @mymoodwriting
Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @vvshere @yeoobin @anyamaris (I thought you may like it) @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames
Note: Thanks for joining the event and loving my works. I love interaction so please do tell me how you all like my works.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT UNDER THIS POST 18+
*under the cut*
🏆
Boxing Clubs? Are you really interested in them? No, not really. Your opinions don’t matter to your friend who is really jumping around like a fool in your bedroom for finally getting the tickets for herself and you to watch the tomorrow’s event of the Django Boxing Club. You have heard about the boxers in your town but never got the interest to dive deeper into the information about them. Your friend has mentioned her favourite’s name a lot in your conversations but you only pretended listening her.
“When are we going there?” You asked her in a bored tone contrast to her over-excited self. She stopped jumping and sits beside you, resting her palms on your shoulder and turning you to face her with excitement overflowing her eyes.
“Finally, I am going to their special show and even with you. I would probably faint there when seeing them that close but you will catch me okay! We will hang out to nearby café before and then we will go the event’s place. It will start at 9 o’clock.”
“No way! We will be out there late at night.” You didn’t expect to be a night event, you never been to any place at late night so you are a bit conscious right now.
“It’s okay Y/N. Many audiences will be there and it would be pretty much crowded to become somebody’s target for bad intentions.”
“I don’t know how to not worry but please we have to come back as soon as possible after the show ends.”
“Deal. Anyways I’m heading out for my home because I need to get a proper sleep today’s night even though I know I can’t sleep knowing I will be meeting Sa-“
Suddenly a ring interrupts her statement. The call was from her boyfriend asking her when will she get back home. She hurriedly makes her way out of your apartment waving you a quick farewell for the end of the day and you smiled in return to see her so excited for every little thing in her life. Maybe, you should also date someone then it would make yourself a little bit more interested in life.
Preparing yourself to the bed, you are still lost in thoughts about tomorrow’s event as to what can happen there. Not that you are expecting something worse but as you never been to such places and also late at night, you are a bit confused and overthinking.
————
Next day, early in the morning, your sleep got disturbed by a call from your friend to remind you about the events for the later in the day. You spent your Saturday morning as usual with treating yourself a nice healthy breakfast and cleaning stuffs all around your apartment.
Afternoon comes with the arrival of the exciting-self of your friend. Looking at her, you realized how she always dolls her up for every little occasion and being excited for her favorite stuffs. Where on the other end, you are always so bored with your usual plain life and dress up in casuals with no make up and all. Shaking your head to let this thought out of your mind, you picked up an outfit of a baggy pants and an oversized t-shirt.
“Are you wearing that?” your friend made a disgusted expression on your choice.
“Yes. Why? Is there something wrong with this?”
“Of course. Everything.” She moved you aside and starts to rummage through your closet and chose a light pink shirt with a white sketchy skirt. The skirt has a descent height to cover your thighs properly but to you the outfit is a bit too scandalous for the event.
“I’m not wearing that to a place where there will be lot of boys and men.”
“Its not like I’m asking you to wear revealing clothes to attract boys but atleast wear something girly please and perhaps this will look good on you maybe you will get a boyfriend for yourself there.”
Trying out the outfit, it reveals not that bad to wear to such events and eventually you agreed on it with her. You leave your wavy mid-length hair open and put some lip tint to go with the casual look.
Feeling of refreshment hits your body while walking along the side of the streets with your bestfriend. Maybe you should go out often to such exciting events or you will die of boredom in your room someday.
————
You spent your evening quite nicely with your friend in the café and later hanging out in the nearby mall. It was a thirty minutes way to the club from the mall so you left at 8:00 pm. Due to traffic, you both reached the place at 8:45 and on arriving, you could see how these events actually look like. The place is not bright enough to read the posters in the alley to know the information written on them. The club is situated at the end of the alley and while making your way towards it, you can feel people spread in the alley are eyeing you both up and down which making you a bit uncomfortable but your friend reassures you repeatedly not to mind them because they always look at others in that way. Reaching near the club, you could feel a lot more girls are there which made your anxious self a bit calm. The girls were either in groups of two or many but all were immersed in some exciting topics and with posters in their hands.
“Take this. This is a cheering board. I have only two hands so I can’t hold this and I will be holding these two photo sticks.” She shows her two sticks with one having a picture of an attractive male and other one with a name written on it, ‘Choi San’.
“Is this your favorite boxer?” Taking the cheering board from her hand on which is written,
‘I am cheering for you so do your best Choi San.’
You chuckled on her hardworks on making all these for the event. To your question, she nods her head aggressively with a big smile on her face. You both look towards the entrance finding out that the people have start entering the club because it’s already the time for the start of the event. Not realizing what to do, your friend dragged you hastily inside to get a better place for the best view to the show. Fortunate enough, you both got the front row from where you can see the ring of the wrestling show from an eight feet distance and the bright lights above it is making the surrounding view of the ring clear as well.
“Y/N! I swear if you don’t fall in love with the wrestling shows today. Just have a look on San’s match.”
Nodding your head reluctantly, your gaze focused on the various displayed posters around the ring of San. In every picture, his intimidating sharp eyes with a slick jaw is making you attracted towards him. His black hair complimenting his look even more and now you are hoping to see this individual in person soon. You look to your side to find your friend busy texting her boyfriend and so you start to look around to get in the surroundings more.
The place is only brightly lit in the center where the stage ring is situated so that every audience can have the clear view of the show. To the end of the ring on your right, a table where two judges were sitting and discussing something between them. Behind them, a man was standing who caught you staring there and then he smirked at you while checking you out all over. You shifted in your place and he shook his head and turned back to enter a door. Creep!
To your back, some were either sitting or standing but everyone has an excitement in them with energetic self for the show. You were looking at each person to recognize whether you know anyone or not when suddenly an announcement brought back your attention towards the center.
“Hello, everyone. Welcome to Django Club’s Night Show. This is the most anticipated show for you all and us as we know our boxer Choi San of our district will be competing against the State’s most renowned boxer Johnny. Let’s begin the show and cheer for them.” Everyone cheered on the end of the announcement and not to think otherwise but suddenly you were also excited for the show.
The cheering went wild when San entered the ring, one hand holds the middle ring rope tightly to make a swift entry from beneath it. His other hand is adjusting his white sando on his sweaty body. His muscles are well reflected for the sweats under the bright lights, looking like a fresh exotic meal served in a 5-star restaurant. Oh gosh! What the hell are you imagining now.
The stage is made of wood plank so his sudden steps made a thud sound and your friend is grinning for the excitement to see him so near. There are four steal beams in the corners of the ring stage covered with foam padding and a canvas mat is covering the wooden plank with a fabric skirt on the elevated sides to cover and prevent the spectators from seeing underneath. He made his way towards the bean on your left to lean his back on it when his opponent entered the ring from the other side in a similar way and the cheering from his end was also quite loud. The man whom you saw before behind the judges appeared again but he is having some deep conversation with San. He is whispering into San’s ears and you were squinting your eyes to know what is going on.
Oh girl! The moment that mysterious man turned around and all he found out is you being interested in his private life. He smiled at you and you got startled on this sudden interaction. He tapped on San’s shoulder and again whispered something but now they both looked at your direction and both of them having dirty smirks on their face, while San is smirking with a dark expression and the other one with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Your wide eyes quickly look over your friend, who turned towards you the same moment.
“Have you seen them looking in our way?”
“Yeah, I have but who is that man standing behind him?”
“That’s his manager, Jung Wooyoung like I have heard they are best friends more like brothers but whatever decision one has to make, they always consult with each other before hand. The manager is quite popular among girls because of his flirty nature but as far as I have heard that they both are single so you can have a chance.”
“Shut up! What the hell are you even talking about? Me and them? Never is this happening in this lifetime.” You hit her arm and both focused on the match which has started with San punching Johnny directly to the jaw and making the man stumbled to the floor. Everyone cheered on the act and your friend literally stood up and started jumping. She made you hold up the board a bit higher and then she is waving her sticks to cheer. The match was going quite well for San’s end because he was on the winning edge and now it’s the time for the last round. San is leaning to the beam same as before and Wooyoung came up to him with a bottle to give him some drink. They were talking between themselves when suddenly they abruptly turned their heads towards you. You thought at first that they were looking at someone else but you could see his lips were moving as if he is reading out something.
“Y/N he is reading the cheering board you are holding and see everyone is staring at us.”
Okay! So, all this time, you thought they were having those little interactions with you but it was only them looking at the audience cheering boards and posters. Maybe you are really overthinking. But why are you feeling a bit disappointed on knowing this!
The last round started with a loud whistle followed by the cheering sounds from the dimly lit place from every corner of the club. At this point, the atmosphere is little bit a mixture of smoke and alcohols and even you can hear people betting money on the contestants in a small corner of the club. Suddenly, San made an eye contact with you and you were doing your best to not think it that way and can see his opponent approaching him when he suddenly got a hit on his face and falls to the ground. He closed his eyes on the impact and resting his body on the knees and on two palms to take deep breathes. Panic starts rising your mind as if you are feeling guilty of the cause. You were looking all around to see whether any eyes are accusing you or not but all you could find is eyes focused on the stage and a wave of disappointment washed over the audience.
“What the hell! Where was he looking at?” You look over your shocked face.
“Maybe something distracted him.”
“But what?”
Me? Oh no! it can’t be even possible. This is your first time coming to this sort of shows and probably they have seen lot more beautiful girls in their life. Your eyes travelled back to the stage where san is now wiping the drop of blood from the corner of his mouth and also you can see a cut on his forehead which might be causing pain to him. You failed to notice all this time after the hit, Wooyoung’s gaze was all focused on you and following your every action. San glance at your direction and punched his opponent in such a way that the man couldn’t hit back and didn’t have anymore energy left. San’s white sando is fully drenched with sweat and his squinted sharp eyes are focused on the man before him when he pressed his elbows one on the neck and the other on the lower back to restrain him from getting up and with the time up, San is declared to be the champion of the show.
The digital board above the ring displays
‘ Choi San The Winner 🏆’
You smiled on the result and as expected your friend is shouting his name on top of her lungs. You calmed her down and looked to your phone to see it’s almost 11 at night and urged your friend to head home. San is staring at you while receiving the prize and you hesitated to look that way. You friend is still not willing to go back home but people emptying the place indicates you should head back soon before any worst thing happens.
——��—
When you both were about to walk out of the exist, a voice made you stop.
“Hey you girls!” a high-pitched voice calling out in your direction so on turning your head, you found out the manager is on the stairs beside the front row and looking in your way. Your friend smiled towards the man and he winked at her. He comes near to your presence.
“Hello girls! Myself Wooyoung, you can call me Woo in short. I have something to ask and that’s why I made out some time to speak with you.” All this time he is speaking, his gaze was focused on you.
Your friend happily introduced herself and you as well in which he extends his hand for a shake and before you can give in your hand, your friend shakes his hand aggressively. You and him chuckled on her excitement but he suddenly spoke up.
“Well! Can you stay a bit longer? I have something to ask.” You and your friend looked at each other in confusion as to what this man has to talk about.
“Us?”
“No. Only you.” He is directly staring in your eyes.
“We can’t stay here further because its too late for us to stay outside and even in this place.”
“Hey Wooyoung!” A familiar voice calls out from behind you all and you all turned towards it to find out your friend’s boyfriend Yeosang is standing at the doorway. Your friend run towards him and hugged him tightly and then they both quickly exchanged greeting kisses. They walked to where you and Wooyoung is standing.
“Yeosang? Do you know them and is she your girlfriend?”
“Ah yes! I never introduced her to you because I knew how crazy fan she is of San. She would probably leave me for him.”  They both laughed and your friend hit him and yeosang turns towards you to give you a smile. “And she is her bestfriend. Her name is Y/N.”
“Oh cool! I was going to ask her to come help me with something and now when we all know each other then it would be much easy.”
“Help?” You watched how Yeosang and Wooyoung exchanged glances as if they were silently communicating between them. Wooyoung’s expression become dark and Yeosang laughed lightly, “Well we are leaving as am taking her to my house for tonight and I suppose you can help him. Trust me you are safe with him because he is my bestfriend and also knows how to fight well.”
“Y/N I trust yeosang so if he is assuring you on this matter then please trust him for me.”
Your thoughts are debating on whether to trust them or not but deep down you want to escape the boredom of your life and experience something thrilling so you accepted the offer. Your friend and her boyfriend took a leave and you know well what is their plan for the night so you just chuckled and turn towards Wooyoung with raised eyebrows to know why you are here exactly.
His gaze is on your legs and you just brushed your skirt to show your uneasiness for his act. He quickly looked up and grinned, “You are really pretty but you should not have worn this dress which is apparently looking too good on you and getting the attention it needs.”
“Thanks but I don’t usually go out and that’s why I thought to wear this maybe don’t know when again I would get the chance to wear it again.”
“Never.” Wooyoung whispered but when he saw your confused look, he quickly spills out the reasons to keep you here.
“Well Y/N, you did notice how San got the punch there and do you know why did that happen?”
You shook your head when suddenly he came forward and slide his hand around your neck to pull you closer, “Umm Wooyoung….”
“Yes?”
“Why did it happen?”
“Because of you. Your pretty face was distracting my boy and it leads to him getting a punch.”
“Me? But I-“
“You are not sorry for that?” you shyly look down but his other hand grips your chin to face him.
“Are you not sorry for that?” You nodded and he smiled when his gaze moves down from your eyes to your pink lips.
“You need to repay for that you know so come with me to our van and clean up his wound. I hope you won’t deny this.”
“I am sorry but I need to go home.”
“I will take you back home only when you help my boy to clean his wound and pain.”
Your eyes taking in his look, he has a sharp facial feature with veiny neck which is revealed due to his black and white Versace-Greca printed shirt which has three buttons open from the top revealing his chest teasingly with a black baggy pant. You quietly agreed with him and he took you to the backside of the club to a darker alley where on one side a van was parked. Every step nearing the van is making your heart beat faster and also being so close with wooyoung is not helping the situation.
————
Coming to the side of the van, he moved away from you and entered the front passenger seat. You are following his movements to contemplate the situation accordingly. You can only see him turning back inside and removing a curtain separating the back portion of the van which is almost like a travelling mini room with a quite enough space for two persons to sleep and also rest of the space to hang clothes and keeping all necessary place. These were not visible properly so out of curiosity you were leaning a bit forward to see what was inside and suddenly you meet San’s eyes, he smirks.
Wooyoung came out and holds your hand to take you to the back of the van. He opened the door and signalled by his head to you to enter it. The yellow hue light coming from inside the van is the only bright light in that alley right now and then when you looked inside, you can see everything clearly what you were imagining from outside and out of all things, the most eye catchy to you now is that San is sitting leaning his back to the driver’s seat staring at you.
“Hi sweetheart.” The way he said the nickname to you is so seductive and the deep voice is making the nickname a sweet venom from his mouth.
“Ummm Hi….” You entered the van and quickly sit on the seat which is taking the half side of the van to whose other San is sitting. The seat is in a somewhat shape of a sofa which can fit almost two people to sleep. Next in the way, Wooyoung entered the van and shut the door.
“Help me.” He is not asking you, this way he is totally commanding you so you quickly asked them for the necessary medicines and cotton and water and lastly the bandages. His black loose leathery pants are matching with the way his sweaty muscles and neck are shining under the yellow light seems like a smooth buttery material is wrapped around his skin.
Wooyoung provide you with all the things you asked for and you scooted near san to start clean his wounds but his hands pull you close and made you sit on his lap while his one leg is folded to make you sit on it and the other one is spread in front and near the feet, Wooyoung is sitting eyes bored in his phone.
“You need to come closer to take a proper look at the wound.” You want to scream for this close proximity but keeping your mouth and mind shut, you just nodded on his words.
You are so immersed in cleaning his wound, you didn’t notice a small smile on his lips and the way his hands moving upward to caress your back. The sudden touch made you shift in your place and when you look at his eyes, they are still closed. You brushed off the feeling and continue doing your work when his one hand grabs your neck tightly but not much to make you uncomfortable and the other hand holds your hand which was resting on his shoulder. You stopped what you were doing.
“Did I tell you to stop?”
“I a-am  do-doing it.” You know he is up with something but a tingling sensation inside you is making you excited and let him to do whatever he wants.
“What happened? Is there something making you uncomfortable?”
“……no.”
“Then continue.” You resume your actions but this time his hand holding your other wrist leaves it and put it on your knees and sliding them upward in the way folding your skirt slowly revealing your thighs and the grip on your neck tightens. This cause you to scratch the wound a bit.
“Ah!” your and wooyoung’s worried eyes looked his way. Wooyoung asked him when taking his and yours position precisely, “What hurt you again?”
“Nothing Woo, just someone is being a bad girl here.”
“I’m sorry but……” But? What will you say? That your damn hand is distracting me and now you have to repay me for distracting me from my one-night healer job? You remained quiet.
“But?” Woo asked you from behind so you turned your head to see him smirking.
“I think she is not willing to help me with this so maybe she can help me with something else.”
“Huh?” You didn’t get what San is referring to when he suddenly make you sit facing Woo and leaning your back to his chest. You tried to sit up but he grabs your throat lightly and pressed your torso down.
“Woo why don’t we celebrate the night in our own way?”
“I’m liking the celebration already.”
“Celebration?”
San whispered in your ears, “You are going to help me in this celebration or you are not getting home tonight. I know your body is also aching with the excitement for this.”
Wooyoung scoots near to your figure and he unbuttons your shirt revealing you in a white bra underneath it. His hungry eyes scans all over the exposed part and in action your hands moved to hide them but got held back by San.
“No need to hide this prettiness from us.” Your eyes following how wooyoung shifted your skirt a bit upward to reveal the dark wet patch on your panty.
“San she is already so wet for us.”
“Mhm….She is equally excited for us to devour her as she is our main dessert for the celebration for my win.” His hands slide down your shirt from the shoulders to prepper your neck and shoulder with wet kisses and biting on some places. You whimpered when he bit you near the ear and then he got to know that is your sweet spot so he repeatedly bit you in that region. Meanwhile, Wooyoung slide down your panties slowly and removing your shoes in the way. He placed himself between your legs and him sitting on his knees holding your knees apart to view your folds.
“San I want to taste her first. I want to taste whether the dessert is as delicious I have expected or more than that.” San chuckled on Woo’s dedication and paused on his way of devouring you. He grabs your chin and made you look at him, “Woo please eat her out and I want to see how long she can keep her little mouth shut from us.” Then San kissed you, a dominating kiss and when he said you are their dessert, he really meant it because the way he is sucking your lips and then he bit you to open your mouth and obediently your mouth opened to which his tongue exploring the inner mouth all over. Wooyoung’s tight grip on your inner thigh and his hot breath fanning over your folds made you alert of his presence between your legs and your exposed parts.
“Mhmmmm” this is what you could manage to say between the kiss when your aching heat comes in contact with wooyoung’s hot breathe.
Suddenly, Woo takes a long strip from the lower regio to the upper fold and this made your body arche but held back in place by San. San detach his lips from you to look at Woo and you also followed his gaze to see him looking upward with lust in eyes and your leaking arousal on his lips.
“She really tastes like the most delicious dessert than I ever had.”
“She tasted exactly the same up here as well.” San replied to agree with Woo.
San pushed your head on his shoulder when his one hand grabs your throat and the other one on your thigh. His mouth attached with the side of your throat to suck on them. Woo is sucking your folds as if that is his favorite dessert he got after years and this is the last time he has his hands onto. The overwhelming sensation is causing to building up a knot in your stomach and you close your eyes tightly to keep yourself enough with the feel of taking you to the edge.
“San….Woo….”You breathily moaned and then San spoke up. You gripped Woo’s hair tightly making him grunt in pain and pushing his face more inward while the other hand is gripping SAN’s thigh, almost your nails digging in.
“You are not going to cum unless we are satisfied enough to let it loose.”
You shook your head as it was already too much for you to control and now his commanding voice is making it impossible to hold it in. To your disapproval san’s hand travelled down to your clit and starts rubbing circle adding to the already stimulated region.
“SAN!......please no….please….I want to….”
“Should we stop?” Your ears are taking in the wet sounds of woo sucking your folds and San’s wet kisses on your throat but his words warned you.
“NO.”
“Then take what we are giving or else we are leaving you here.” You are totally whimpering under the touches and sucking of two males. Woo’s grip on your thigh is making a read handprint and while san’s other hand is messaging your covered tits and one is rubbing circles. Woo’s tongue entered your wet folds and San inserted one finger into the hole making a sloppy sound. Thrusting of tongue and finger is too much for you and keeping you on edge for so long is making you overstimulated with the sensation.
“Cum.” San’s whisper sends an electric wave to your body and you let it loose.
“Woo!…..I- I-…. San.” You are heavily breathing and you didn’t notice that San has removed your cloth covering your tits and woo removed the skirt from your waist. Woo tiredly comes up to take one of your breasts into his mouth and messaging the other one.
San again welcomed you to a more rough and needy kiss this time. During the kiss, San removed his sando and woo got up to free himself from every clothing from his body. You look towards Woo and then you see how well built his body is. Probably he also goes to practices with San. Woo smirked when he caught you staring at him.
“Do you have a boyfriend?”
“No.”
“Do you need one?” Why is this man suddenly interested in my private life? I mean I know I am having nothing to hide here at this point but still.
“ I don’t know.”
“ But we know.” San suddenly interjects between you and Wooyoung.
“What?”
“You don’t need boyfriend anymore when you got us.”
“Us?”
“Oh Y/N, our sweet dessert. The moment we saw you in that cute pink outfit, we were determined to make you our only dessert.” Woo made his way near both of you.
“Moreover you are my fan.” San spoke from behind when Woo took you from him to hold in his embrace and facing you both towards San. Your eyes following him how he throws away his pants and quickly get off his boxers revealing his hard length to you.
“I’m not your fan. I just came here to accompany my friend and that’s how you saw me holding that sign board.”
“That’s pity that you are not a fan of my boy but you are still my girl.”
“I’m not your girl.” San quickly made his way in front of you holding you tightly to enter your entrance. His length teasing you and Woo’s hard length poking in your lower back from behind making you anxious to feel them inside you.
“Look at me.” Your eyes quickly look up to meet San’s eyes.
“Have you done this before?”
“no.”
“We will keep that in mind but we won’t go easy on you .”
“We?”
“We both will enter you the same time and maybe then we will take turns if you can keep up.”
“ I don’t think-“ San entered you and his big length makes your eyes teary and san kissed away your tears and cooed you.
“Its okay sweetheart. I know you can take us. Trust us and everything will be fine."
You nodded your head on his words and he entered your entrance with ease again and his length widens your holes which cause your eyes to water even more. Your hands move upward to touch his abs and to feel him more close than already he is.
“SAN!”
His thrusts are sloppy and he is caressing your back and cooing in your ears to make you calm. He kissed away your teary eyes to make you feel the little comfort in that state. Woo entered you from behind and the pain for taking another length makes you to cry out.
“Woo..”
“It’s okay sweetheart. Take it. You can do it well.”
Woo added, “ I know you can do take me too.”
You made your concentration focused on the two lengths inside of you to make you at ease. You didn’t have sex with anyone before but you have taken off this sexual frustration off from you on your own. Relationship is a big deal for you as you overthink about every little thing in your life but tonight you let all of your thoughts to be aside and just go with the flow.
Their thrusts are sloppy and in sync with each other. They are praising you with their nicknames of their own, San is calling you his sweetheart and woo as his girl but the common name they have given you is ‘Dessert’. Why not because tonight you are their desert for the celebration for his win.
“San….Woo…”
You can feel a familiar knot is building up inside of you and their thrusts are increasing in pace. SAN’s thrusts are more aggressive and faster in pace while Woo’s thrusts are rhythmical and a bit gentle.
“You are so tight…agh…” woo growled and sucked on your neck.
“You feel so good wrapped around me. You are doing so well for us.” San praised you and pulled your hairs backward to rest your head on woo’s shoulder and then he leans forward to kiss your chest and gliding his mouth to one of your breast and sucking them hard and messaging the other in process. Woo’s one hand gripping your hip similarly like San to maintain his pace and the other one playing with the nipple of the one San is messaging. They repeated the same action with the other one in the same way.
You are a whimpering mess now and under all these touches with two males thrusting inside of you making you talk rubbish. Your are choking on your words because of the pain and also the pleasure you are feeling making your vision go white. Their pace increase and you are about to let it burst and you can feel by their words that they are also at their edge.
“SAN I’m about to cum. Woo please let me cum. Please San”
“Yes sweetheart. I know , just wait a bit more.”
“My girl. I will cum soon.” Woo thrusted deeply and after three thrusts he came. He rested his head on your shoulders and breathing heavily. SAN’s thrusts increase again and the sloppy sound in your entrance making you to let it go by any instant. Woo hold one of the breast and the other hand rubbing circle on your clit when he suddenly puts his lips on you.
“Woo….please…this is too much.”
“Cum.”
“San!”
You both cum together but he didn’t take it out of you rather sloppily thrusting inside you. The exhausted self of yours is very sensitive to this overstimulation but they didn’t stop their action until you all ride out your high.
“ my girl is the best and did so well.” Woo leaned to his back and let you rest against his body. San pulled himself out of you and pulls a cloth from nearby hanger and wiped your face. He threw that cloth away and take you on his lap and embraced your body as if protecting you from the whole universe.
“Sweetheart you did so well for me and for us. Thank you.”
“Hmmm…” San is rocking you on his lap. Woo sit beside him and caress his hand all over your body to make you feel at ease.
“My girl is so sleepy.” Woo caress your head lightly.
“SAN I need to go home.”
Woo asked you, “ Do you think you can walk?”
“It’s okay sweetheart. You sleep and we will drive you home later.”
“You don’t know my address.” Your eyes are hooded and can’t think of anything as your brain is still foggy brain.
“It’s okay I don’t need it when we can take you to our house as it’s also yours from today.”
Woo added, “ if we need your address then we can ask it from Yeosang.”
You nodded and clinged to San and your other hand hold woo closer to your body. San kissed you on your forehead and woo kissed you on the shoulder and pulls a cover over to cover three of you.
“Sleep my girl. We have so much to talk about tomorrow.”
“Sweetheart don’t worry about anything as you are now with us. We have to take care of you, our dessert who has melted with all the exhaustion and we are not letting you go now. Sleep.”
Maybe this is something you really needed in life. A life with these two about whom you didn’t know anything few hours ago but now they are the ones comforting you in their embrace and protecting you from the whole universe. Your life possibly can be better with them and maybe something more interesting the future holds for three of you.
You fell into slumber and them holding you close tightly in their embrace away from the whole world.
In the silence of the night, there is a sweet dessert kept warm. The happiness can only be ended on a good note with a dessert.
———————————-
This is my first time writing SMUT so please do tell me whether I should write further any smut fics or not.🥹
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tyinghershoe · 14 days
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ੈ✩‧₊˚ Unscented |
Shigaraki’s hands were as soft as Tenko allowed them to be.
Pairing: Shigarki/Tenko x Reader
Genre: fluff/oneshot/drabble
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You’d love to one day write parallels about Shigaraki’s hands.
How the fingers that wreaked havoc upon Japan once held you with the lightest touch. That, yes, they’ve caused pain and suffering - but at the same time, you’ve never felt anything softer.
They never said Tenko wasn’t human. 
Your first encounter with him was as expected. Shigaraki was always on guard, his eyes distant as they glanced you over. There was a moment of silence as this took place, the wooden floors creaking each time you shifted your feet, you wondered if this was the only thing he listened to as time passed (there was no room for conversation with just him and himself).
Rumors of the League were whispered in every alley you turned to, and while you never considered yourself a villain, the thought of being a perfect fit for society was just as incomprehensible. You noticed the flaking of Shigaraki’s palms and wondered if he would’ve ever fit that mold. (One day, when you’re both better acquainted, Tenko will help you shape your own).
“I wouldn’t call you a villain,” Tenko whispered to you one night, his voice barely audible over the creaking floorboards. The bar was still, with you two the exception, enclosed between the dim lighting from the lamps above. This was the closest you two have ever been, your fingers gently placing globs of lotion onto the webs of his hands. They weren’t as rough of a texture as you imagined, the skin feeling delicate beneath you. Perhaps it was the brand you bought this time.
Those eyes, once distant and wary, were now soft as they met yours. “You have yet to kill anyone,” he persisted, his tone somber and solaced. “And as far as I’m concerned, you still work a 9 to 5 job, just like the rest of the world.”
“I have yet to pay off a parking ticket.” You confessed, your voice filled with a type of guilt. The alcohol here was less than holy, yet the man in front of you offered acceptance, one that was devoid of judgment. There was a dumbfounded expression as he closed his eyes, allowing you to softly trace the irritation away as your thumbs gently soothed his flaking face - you wondered if this source of discomfort was physical or something more.
“I won’t sell you out.” He deadpanned, before turning to you with a menacing grin, “But seriously, I destroy everything around me. They call me a murderer and yet you’re still here. You’re still here.” Shigaraki grunted, his eyes turning dark and distant as if it were your first time meeting.
There was only a hum of acknowledgment as you finished aiding his inflammation. It’s times like these in which Shigaraki was unpredictable, but you were only ever worried for his sake. Tenko was always an impulsive man. “I’ve never felt safer,” you murmured, rewarding you with a scoff of disbelief. 
“You’ll regret saying that if you ever turn to dust.” He mumbled, the threat empty. His (now soft) hand wrapped around your wrist, yet they held no real malice - you made it a point to ignore the fact that his pinky has always been raised.
-
a/n: How many months has is been since I last posted a fic? My age is showing in the sense that it’s hard for me to sit down and write all the time, but the mha hyper fixation is back, so hopefully the desire to write comes with it! This is my first time writing anything that isn’t Izuku Midoriya, I’m trying to branch out of characters that I’m comfortable with, but I promise I’ll post more of him soon.
Thank you for reading!
Follow me on ao3 @tyinghershoe
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bluemari23 · 5 months
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soul haze || choi seungcheol
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soul glow
summary: you had just gotten home after leaving the seventeen concert early, only for your phone to start ringing with what you think is the biggest joke of the century. it turns out, that maybe you left too early.
pairing: choi seungcheol x neurodivergent reader
genre: soulmates, soul bonds, idol au, angst
warnings: some insecurity, angst, not much
after many requests here is the second part to soul glow! enjoy :)
------------------------------
You kept the lights off when you closed the door behind you, still overstimulated and almost needing the reprieve the darkness allowed. It's also not like you didn't know your apartment like the back of your hand, everything placed meticulously and to your liking. 
Locking the door, you maneuvered yourself to your bathroom, needing to remove the make up your friend had put on you before the concert. You could feel it on your skin and that was something that always seemed to bother you when you became overstimulated. You couldn’t help it. 
Once you felt that all of it was gone, you used your favorite moisturizer on your skin, loving that it cooled you down and left you feeling like you skin was soft. You know it was on your skin, but instead of feeling it on your skin, it was like it blended in perfectly, not just sitting on the surface. 
You were about to get changed into your pajamas when your phone rang, an unknown number coming up on your screen. You ignored it the first time, but the second time and then the third time had you wondering just who was calling you at almost ten pm. On the fourth ring you finally picked up the phone. 
“Hello, who—” You were cut off by a man’s deep voice. 
“Is this the phone of Ms. Y/n L/n?” Your face turned up in complete confusion, not wanting to deal with an important phone call so late when you were already overstimulated.
“Uhm, can I ask who is calling first before I give that answer?” You try in vain to see who was calling, as they just insist on asking if this was your phone number or not. 
“Is this Ms. L/n speaking?” 
“Yes. Now can I ask who is calling me so late at night?” You almost spit out, already tired of the person on the other end. 
“This is the manager for the group Seventeen who you just saw perform in concert. Now, before you hang up—” You almost look out your blinds, wondering how this man knew you were about to hang up the phone, now thinking this call is a huge prank. 
“Please note that you and your friend sat in row 1 seats 8 and 9 and you left the concert early. We also have your friend’s license plate number and both of your ticket confirmation numbers if you still don’t believe me.” Your eyes had now widened considerably, any tiredness now leaving your eyes and body. 
You were feeling a little scared at this point and were trying to figure out if you had broken any rule or etiquette at the concert that you didn’t know about. It was your first concert and you truly were worried that you did something wrong now. 
“Miss, are you there?” You hadn’t even realized you had spaced out, not listening to the man on the phone. 
“Uhm, y-yes I am.” You stuttered your reply. “Am I in trouble?’
“Uhm, no miss, you aren’t in any trouble—” You cut him off this time.
“I promise I didn’t mean to break any rules or anything. It was my first concert and I tried to learn proper etiquette before hand—” 
“Miss. I can assure you aren’t in trouble—” You can hear struggling happening on the other side of the phone and a new voice starts talking. 
---
Scoups was freaking out now, fearing you had gotten away and they would never find you, he would never find you. He could feel Jeonghan and Mingyu trying to talk to him but all he could imagine was the thought of never getting to hold you. 
That all stopped when he heard his manager on the phone, reassuring someone that they weren’t in trouble. He couldn’t stop himself; he just barreled forward and took the phone from his now frozen manager. 
“Y/n?” He asks, voice shaky as he feared he took the phone when it wasn’t his soulmate on the other end. 
“Yes?” He could feel his heart begin racing, hearing your voice. He knew it was you, then and there. The tingles he felt and the beating of his heart didn’t lie. 
He didn’t speak the best English, and he didn’t know how to vocalize what he wanted in his moment of urgency, so he called Joshua over, who was the closest, and told him what he wanted to say. 
“Tell her that she needs to come back to the stadium, that we will get a vehicle for her if needed.” He was straight to the point, his urgency almost bordering the line of manic, his fear of you disappearing covering his usual calm nature. 
---
“Hi, this is Joshua, Scoups does not speak the best English so he is asking me to translate, is this okay?” Oh, my, goodness. You were now on the phone with one of your biases. You felt way in over your head and that this was all a dream. 
“Uhm, hello. I—uh yes, that’s fine. I do speak some Korean but I am still learning.” You mention your knowledge of the Korean language hoping that it would help them communicate if needed. You didn’t know if you would be of any help, you had no clue what was going on at all. 
“Oh, that’s awesome. Well, is it possible for you to come back to the stadium? There are some things we need to discuss with you in person. It is very important.” You tilted your head to the side, confusion coming back into your head as shock is pushed to the back.
“I, uhm, my friend just dropped me off at home. I don’t have a way back to the stadium.”
“We can send a car right now. What is your address?” Joshua is quick to respond, ignoring Scoups hitting him in the shoulder and trying to get him to ask you more things. 
You give the man your address, hearing the almost stress in his voice. You would hate to cause anyone trouble, especially people who just finished an almost three hour concert and were probably dead on their feet. 
“Keep her on the phone, don’t let her hang up!” Someone tells Joshua, making you question everything. 
“Who was that? Why do I need to stay on the phone?” You ask after slowly translating their words in your head. 
“Uhm, that was Scoups, and we just want to make sure you get here safe!” You can tell the excuse was said by someone else, Joshua just repeating the words. 
To be honest, you were so tired and still overstimulated that you just decided to go along with everything hoping it meant you could get home sooner and into bed. You were bordering non-verbal again but you didn’t want to make things difficult for anyone, especially when they claim this was an important thing. 
You hated feeling like a burden. Like you were being difficult. 
By the time the car arrived for you, you had been asked a couple more questions, just basic things like what your favorite Seventeen song was, or when you became a carat. You think they were just trying to pass the time, but you still had a hard time answering them. 
You had grabbed your concert bag, thankful you hadn’t taken anything out of it yet, and made your way out to the car. 
It took about an hour to make it back to the stadium and inside, given the after-concert traffic, but you made it inside and the person who drove you there helped you get past security where someone was waiting for you. 
“Are you Miss Y/n” He was wearing a tour shirt and black jeans and lots of wires with a small earpiece. You figured he was someone on the Seventeen management or security team. The driver walked you forward, leaving you with a nod of his head. 
“Yes, sir.” Your voice was quiet. You tried hard to project your voice but it was like the connection between your brain and your voice box was faulty. 
“Please come this way.” The man had such a bright smile on his face with his dimples peeking through, that you almost felt uncomfortable. You were bordering grumpy now, not having slept or bed in bed by your normal time. 
“We are very that excited you are here.” The man tries to make small talk, but you don’t understand what he is trying to imply and it makes you even more annoyed. You don’t manage to respond by the time he stops in front of a door to your right.         
“You can go on in, Miss.” You nod your head in thanks, before slowly turning the door handle and pushing your way in. 
The first thing you notice is a bright, glowing silhouette, surrounding Scoups. You stood frozen, the both of you, just taking each other in. Him seeing you up close for the first time, and you trying your hardest not to faint at the implication of the glow.   
You knew what it meant, and suddenly everything made sense for why they needed you back to the stadium, as quick as you could. You were in a haze by the bright glow of the soul bond, realizing Scoups was your soulmate. 
You were still frozen in the doorway, trying to make sense of your soul bond when Scoups pushed forward, slowly and cautiously as he watched you. He thought you looked like a deer caught in the headlights, and it caused him some discomfort, seeing you like that. 
“Hello, my glow.” His voice was deep, yet soft as he approached you, causing tingles to shoot up your spine. 
“Can I—Can I hold you?” He just wanted to comfort you, feeling in his soul that you needed it and he couldn’t help but to take your silence and your doe eyes as a response. You could just feel his arms wrap around you, as if he knew exactly what you needed in that moment, something to ground you, to support you. 
The second his arms were around you, the glow you both held disappeared and you both felt like a weight was lifted from your shoulders. Both of your bodies almost immediately loosened, all of the tension leaving your bodies. 
“My glow.” Scoups whispered affectionately in your ears, pulling you into the room without letting you go from his embrace. 
“I’ve found you.”
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jymwahuwu · 2 months
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TW: non-con, mean, lots of punishment, sorry I'm a masochist 😔😌
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So…I can't help but think how similar Ratio and Aventurine are in giving confusing punishment instructions…well, assuming you did something wrong, for Aventurine that would be a random excuse, for Ratio it would be because: you are not reading and wasting your time doing things you like.
And then…you have to face your punishment. Aventurine sighed like he didn't mean to do this. It's unfortunate that you forced him to do this. He explains to you the rules of choosing a punishment, like gambling. If your die lands more than 4 then it's 10 minutes spanking, if only 1 it's 20 minutes spanking + edging, 3 is 20 minutes spanking + over stimulation, if 2? Yeah, okay, he will only spank you for 8 minutes. If you win 3 numbers from his lottery ticket you avoid the penalty, and if you win 2 numbers you win a dildo and a ribbon to tie your hands! You are always so confused when you listen…
This punishment, that punishment.
There’s also the orgasm challenge I mentioned before. If you don't cum within the time limit, you'll keep getting creampied, but the orgasm will be against your will. Imagine you are being face to face with Aventurine. His cock was buried deep in the warm wetness of your vagina and thrust in and out, almost bruising your cervix. You were crying, your areola bulging under his thumb, a little sweat on your skin, glistening in the light.
There is also a timer placed next to you. You turned your head away, noticing that there was not much time left, but Aventurine deliberately slowed down the pace of his thrusts, grinning to see how you would respond. If you don't want to be creampied for the rest of the night, you have to be smart about your arousal. You move your hand to your clit, trying to rub it, but he puts your hands back above your head while rocking his waist back and forth, pressing his balls against your quivering petals.
"No cheating."
Your tears were building, "P-please. Aventurine, I…"
"Uh-oh, last 30 seconds," he announced easily. You watched in horror as the seconds ticked by, urging your body towards orgasm. You cooperate, but Aventurine stops moving, just watching you passionately ravaging yourself with his cock. He counts down.
"10- 9- 8- 7-"
You trembled, curled your toes, and bounced up, pretending to orgasm on his cock, then exhaled. He smiled. "Fake orgasm. You really think I can't tell? You used to scream and squirt."
"No-I'm serious-" You bit your lip, defending yourself.
"Yeah, now the next round begins. You win your own creampie." He started thrusting again, hearing your whimper drowned in the moans, immersed in the whirlpool.
Eh, it's really late at night😴 I can't write the Ratio part. That's it for today.
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seresinhangmanjake · 9 months
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The One I Want: Part 9
Jake "Hangman" Seresin x plus size!reader
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Summary: You’re new in town and some guy named Jake is about to be your roommate. Being skeptical of new people keeps you lonely and uninterested in any entanglements, but Jake is desperate to change that.
Notes/Warnings: traumatic past, mention of death, very likely typos
Words: 1342
The One I Want Masterlist
“Can you see?”
“Yes,” Jake says, leading you across the sand with only the moon illuminating his path to the shore. But even that can hardly be considered sufficient, to you at least, as night’s clouds move at a good pace, frequently dulling the glow. Your toes dig into the grains in an effort to find some sense of balance in the darkness, but you're no better than a newborn deer, remaining steady only by Jake’s firm hand. “Don’t step there.”
You’re pulled to the left just before your bare foot lands on a sharp shell and you stumble into his side. “Why did you want to tell me here?”
“I like it here.” Abruptly stopping, Jake drops onto the sand. “This is a good spot,” he says, then releases your hand to pat the sand in front of where he sits. 
“You want me to sit there?”
“Mhmm.”
“Between your legs?”
He glances down to the spot in question before staring back up at you. “That’s the idea,” he says. At the apprehension on your face, Jake snickers and lightly wraps his fingers around your wrist, his thumb smoothing over the delicate skin above your pulse. “Come on, you know I don’t bite.”
“You haven’t had much of an opportunity to bite.”
Jake laughs louder, his head briefly throwing back before he raises a brow. “You were on my lap a few hours ago, but this is where you draw the line?”
“Is that a problem?”
“Nope, just trying to get my bearings.”
His smile is impossible to deny. It’s bright and wide and you feel it tugging at your insides, making you want to spread your lips in a grin of your own and nestle yourself into the space he has made for you. Taking a couple of steps forward, you ease yourself down in front of him. When you are where he wants you, he scoots closer until his legs flank your hips and he wraps his arms around your waist, guiding your back against his chest. Any of the budding hesitancy at his closeness on this beach slips away. 
“See, it’s nice, isn’t it?”
You roll your eyes at the playful smugness in his voice and concede. “Fine.”
He doesn't speak again, not for a bit, and in that time the clouds learn to avoid the moon. It reflects clearly off the waves, helping your vision adjust to the darkness, and suddenly you can appreciate why he likes it. It is peace in its closest physical form. And it tells you plenty before Jake even opens his mouth for another word. Whatever he plans to tell you, he wants to balance it out with something within his control: his surroundings. 
“Are you sure you want to tell me?” you ask.
“You more than anyone,” he says. His breath sways the stray hairs by your ear. “It’s not a long story.”
“For whose convenience? Not for mine, right?”
“Not for anyones, it’s just doesn’t contain many added details.” You nod to let him know you understand, then with an exhale heavy enough to shoot a bolt of anxious energy through you, he begins. “I was eighteen, and getting ready to leave for the Academy soon. My sister Amy was already studying at a university about five hours from our town in Texas, but she was coming home for the summer and, as perfect parents do, they went to get her rather than have her find other means of transportation. My father took off work that day just to drive hours with my mother to bring home their daughter when most kids were spending their money on plane and train tickets to get home,” he says. “They were on their way back, and they, um…” With his pause, his head shakes behind you before his chin perches atop your shoulder. You try to twist to face him but his arms encompassing you don’t allow it. For a minute, he just breathes. He stares where you stare, at the waves crashing over the shore before they slink back to join the rest of the ocean. He hears what you hear: the movement of the water, your synchronized inhales and exhales, but hopefully not the pounding of your heart. When his head lifts he presses a kiss to the spot where your neck and shoulder meet. His next words you can feel before they leave his lips. “They didn’t come back.”
Tears prick at the corners of your eyes. “H-How?”
“Rain,” he mutters. “Poor luck.”
Your hand slides along his forearm until your fingers are resting over his. He spreads them enough for you to sneak yours in between. “Jake–”
“It was a long time ago. I’ve made my peace with it in a lot of ways,” he says. “Anyway, my grandmother stayed with me at the house while everything was arranged and settled, and a few months later, I left.”
“Did you still want to go?”
“I don’t know,” he sighs. “They would’ve wanted me to go, so I did. But I realized I was about to be by myself for the first time in my life and I couldn’t believe how much it terrified me when just a couple of months before I was so excited for that freedom. I knew people would be everywhere at the Academy, but I didn’t know any of them.”  
You think of him lost and alone, so unlike the man you know him to be, and instead, so much like yourself. In one place and then another. Familiar with the faces surrounding him and then not. Parents, and then no parents. It doesn’t matter that Jake is stronger than you in every way nameable, finding resilience in the face of such tragedy is damn near impossible, and it breaks your heart for him.
“But then we were assigned roommates,” he continues, “and mine just happened to be decent enough to help me survive the year.”
“Javy?”
Jake hums in agreement. “It’s not that I can’t be alone. I’ve lived alone before, but I like having someone around, sharing my space. It just hasn’t always worked out too well.” His arms tighten around your waist and he shifts as if it might help pull you in closer. The warmth of lips lay a line of kisses up your neck, stopping just below your ear. “But sometimes it does,” he whispers. 
There are more kisses. They make their way over sections of your skin. He presses them into the curve of your jaw, into your shoulder, and when he pushes your hair aside, a few are planted on the back of your neck. Your eyelids flutter and close as you let yourself meld with the tingling sensation. 
“I need to ask you something,” he says softly, and you hum. “You said this is your eleventh new place.” Your eyes shoot open. “Do you intend for there to be a twelfth?”
Swallowing, you reply, “I never intended for there to be an eleventh, or tenth, or nin–”
“You know what I’m asking, beautiful.”
You do, because it’s something you’ve asked yourself plenty of times. No, you don’t intend for there to be a twelfth, but your moves between towns are not planned. They are dependent on the actions of others which are not within your control. You want to stay with Jake, in this town, with people who didn’t think twice about accepting you, but you’re not delusional as to the possibilities awaiting you that might rip everything away. “Jake, I don’t want to leave.”
“Good.” Again, he rests his chin on your shoulder, and again, he lets moments pass in silence. Then he says, “I’ve been meaning to tell you, it’s my birthday next week. Nat’s setting up a party at Penny’s bar. I want you to come but if you’re uncomfortable being there I understand.”
“I’ll come,” you say, because you’re well aware it’s the least you could do for him. 
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Though you can’t see it, Jake’s smile radiates. “Thank you.”
---
tags: @wkndwlff @kmc1989 @sagittarius-flowerchild @dempy @oliviah-25 @rosiahills22 @xoxabs88xox @matisse556 @hardballoonlove @ssa-sadboi @lynnevanss @pono-pura-vida @tgmreader @amgluvsbooks @ravenhood2792 @djs8891 @shakespeareanwannabe @sailor-aviator @penguin876 @tgmavericklover @athenabarnes @emilyoflanternhill @wretchedmo @shanimallina87 @crowsreadsarahjmaas @mamachasesmayhem @sky2nd @jessicab1991 @rosedurin @averyhotchner @horseshoegirl @elite4cekalyma @buckysteveloki-me @shelbycillian @kissmethric3 @fox-bee926 @hangmandruigandmav @waltermis @fandom-life-12 @a-serene-place-to-be @bruher @tngrace @mamaskillerqueen @emma8895eb @benedictsvestcollection @blackwidownat2814 @himbos-on-ice @hookslove1592 @whoeverineedtobe @alwaysclassyeagle @chaytea06 @cherrycolas-things
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hannieween · 9 months
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lunacy | city lights series | h.js
You could no longer hide your infatuation over Joshua Hong. It was becoming painfully obvious, though you weren't sure to what extent he was aware of this. Or if he even cared, for that matter.
✮ pairings: joshua hong x female reader ✮ genre: angst, smut (18+) ✮ aus: rock singer joshua, neighbors with benefits ✮ word count: 18.8k
↣ part i – part ii – part iii – navi post – other fics
₊🎧: underwater - baekhyun ♡︎ | shutdown - moon byul and seori ♡︎ | beautiful liar - monsta x ♡︎ | more - i.m ♡︎ ₊ nsfw warnings under the cut!!
✮ warnings: mentions of menstruation, smut with plot, dom Joshua, sub reader, big dick Joshua, phone sex, dirty talks, foul language, corruption kink, praise kink, exhibitionism: bj in a public space, cum swallowing, multiple sex scenes, masturbation, oral sex (f, m), brat taming: orgasm denial and pussy slaps, unprotected sex, creampie, pet names: pretty girl, baby, princess, sweetheart, bunny (hers) baby boy (his)
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part iv
In your few years being a full time writer, you've made little traditions to keep for yourself.
For example, each time you started outlining your drafts, you'd go to a special spot in your favorite library, near the windows to watch people walk by on the streets. It helps your brain flow with ideas and brainstorm for hours.
Whenever you need to come up with stronger ideas for a plot, or find yourself in a bit of a writer's block, you go to the rooftop of your building. A tradition which has started to taint under the memories of you and Joshua, because quite inevitably, you start thinking of him.
And whenever you submit a finished draft, you tend to go elsewhere. Literally, you buy a ticket and go somewhere else, distract yourself for a little while, even sometimes, you give yourself the luxury to stay in a hotel for a night or two and come back feeling like a new person.
This time, you only bought a ticket for same day travel. But the method of transportation was by train. Which suited your needs a little bit more: you could see the landscape roll by your eyes, the openness of the outskirts of your city was beautiful—so different from looking out the window and seeing big tall buildings and billboards.
You've only visited this city once, when you published your first book years ago. As a young writer, you didn't have much money to go anywhere but there.
But you came across a gem: the town was colorful, it had its own quiet magic of a place loved and celebrated by the people who lived there.
When you first visited, you felt alien to the silent movement of the day. It was so strange to you that at first you got an eerie chill that maybe you got to a ghost town by accident, being so used to the buzz of the city throughout the day.
That's why you chose to come here as soon as you submitted your finished draft. It felt like sending a love letter and then hiding under your bed covers.
There was a small creek in the middle of the beautiful town, and a wooden bridge stood above it. You sat on a bench near the creek, the only noise filling your brain was the current of the stream.
Until the buzz of your phone interrupted that peace.
[9: 14 AM] Yen ✿: good news! [9: 14 AM] Yen ✿: you've been green lighted the second installment to your trilogy   [9: 14 AM] Yen ✿: yay! 🥰 [9: 15 AM] you: What? they already finished reading it? I sent it at midnight ???  [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: of course you're up already  [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: they haven't read it yet, that much i can tell you but  [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: idk what to say girl [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: they already want to know you're working on book 2
That doesn't make sense, you said to yourself.
[9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: why do i feel like this is bad news  [9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: are u not excited or  [9: 16 AM] you: I am! this is great!  [9: 16 AM] you: I'm already working on book 2 :) [9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: great i'll tell them  [9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: btw what happened to mr hot neighbor  [9: 17 AM] Yen ✿: 👀👀  [9: 17 AM] you: Can we have that conversation on another day? I don't want to think about him right now [9: 17 AM] Yen ✿: fine
But it was entirely too late.
Memories of the last night you spent with Joshua started to flood your mind. You saw him last that Saturday night when you asked him to continue with your little agreement of being fuckbuddies.
He agreed. So you agreed to not see each other on Sunday, but what did happen was that he finally asked for your number. Though as expected, he hadn't texted yet.
That was another reason for your departure today. As soon as the clock hit midnight and it was Monday, you sent your file with the finished draft of your book and booked a ticket for the magical town you remember having visited in your first publishing experience.
Will he text? He hadn't all Sunday, so you didn't see it foreseeable that he would on Monday. Well, what do you actually know about him? You knew a few things. You seemed to have measured his behavior really well but what else did you know?
Nothing.
Not his birthday, his favorite color, his favorite song or movie. Does it matter? He's your fuckbuddy. There are no rules as to what you should know about the person you're fucking.
There may be a few details that are pertinent to doing what fuckbuddies do, yes. Like protection and being tested and such, a thing that you already had covered with Joshua, obviously.
But, should you know your fuckbuddy's favorite color? You knew that he didn't like to kiss you while fucking you, for example. And he conveniently fucks you in positions that distance your hands from his face so you can't touch him either.
Why does that feel like a bitter pill to swallow? Ah, yes. You have a terrible infatuation over him. Like a thorn that you do not dare to remove. In fact, you like the pain you get from it because it's the only thing you'll get.
You let out a broken sigh, swallowing your tears. You felt particularly emotional that day—a sign of your upcoming cycle, so your hormones were working twice as hard.
Another reason to stay away from Mr. Hot Neighbour, if you will.
Despite the sunny day, the temperature was growing colder, so that the season was changing to winter. You liked the mixed taste of it, the sunny sky and chill in the air, sitting by the peaceful creak of the ghost town.
You had a pending decision looming in your mind from the moment you took the train in the break of daylight. Should you tell Joshua how you feel? Is it something you thought helped your situation?
There was nothing you could compare your situation to your past experiences. Your past lovers never got to be as relevant as Joshua. No lover ever shook your heart so hard to the point of hurting. It wasn't just the sex, or his crushing beauty—you were well aware of that. 
You just fell in love of the way your bodies synced together. The way that he seemed to hear your thoughts and read the way your body moved so well. He made you feel seen.
Maybe it's not a great idea to confess to him. But you could try another way, maybe taunt him with silly questions about love, like you did before. 
After what seemed like an hour had passed, you opened the small portable cooler you brought with your person. You came prepared with a meal to have in the quietness of the creak, hearing the sounds of nature and the quiet life of the little town around you.
It was a peaceful day, the only thing that disrupted it was your pending talk with Joshua, which still resided in your head, wasn't even a fact yet.
You planned to stay until sunset, which due to the fact that winter was onset, happened early. You chose to read a book on the two hour trip back home, which was a good choice since it had been a while since you read something other than your own work.
In the elevator of your building, you found yourself wishing for a night of peaceful uninterrupted sleep. You didn't want to suffer from insomnia for a good while, although you knew that with your second book green lit, that might be happening soon.
You stifled a yawn as you got to your apartment. It was 7 PM and you decided that it might be a good idea to prepare yourself for bed. You drew yourself a bath, had a small meal and went overboard and induced yourself to sleep with melatonin—for good measure.
The good thing was that it was a dreamless, heavy sleep.
You woke up the next day feeling incredibly groggy and much to your demise, felt the silent announcement of the beginning of your cycle. With a groan, you dragged yourself out of bed and kick started your day.
[11:55 AM] joshua: bunny, are you busy today?
You stared at your screen for a good while. You were in the middle of your daily chores, cleaning your mail and responding to some others when your phone buzzed on your desk.
You turned the silent mode on and decided to respond to it later.
Why does he have to call you that? Does it hurt him to call you by your name?
Easy, you told yourself.
[18:31 PM] joshua: i'll take that as a yes ? [18:34 PM] you: I'm free tonight
You bit your lip. God, why do you feel like a teenager that time you first talked to the person you had a crush on?
[18:34 PM] you: But we can't do anything [18:34 PM] joshua: what do you mean ? [18:37 PM] joshua: are you in?
Your stomach dropped.
[18:37 PM] you: Are you outside my door right now?  [18:37 PM] joshua: where else? [18:37 PM] joshua: open up [18:37 PM] you: Let yourself in
You removed your cancellation headphones from your head and attempted to smooth your hair to appear at least decent and not like the little study mouse you were the whole day.
"Bunny? Where are you?" you heard his sweet voice call from the living room.
"In the study," you replied just as Joshua pushed the door open, sneaking his head in first.
"Hi there," he smiled at you sweetly, looking around like a child in a toy shop. "Wow, this room is so... you."
You laughed. "Is that so?"
"I like it," he nodded, looking at the shelves upon shelves stacked with books and clutter, collection toys and figures from your favorite media. Fairy lights on the walls, a couch on the side that hosted your small army of squishmallows that moved the first night that Joshua slept in.
"Thank you," you replied with an excited smile.
"So? What do you mean we can't do 'anything'?," he did bunny ears over the word.
"I'm... going through stuff," you said, making a circle motion with your palm toward your lower belly.
"Oh," he blinked, then cocked his head to one side. "And?"
It was your turn to blink in bewilderment. "What do you mean 'and'? Is it not super gross for men to even hear the word menstruation?"
"Maybe, for some. I don't know. I don't care," he shrugged with ease. "You've never had period sex, I take it?"
"Joshua! No!" you chastised, your stomach fluttering uneasily when he laughed.
His nose wrinkled as he giggled. "Sorry, but you can't expect me to be grossed out by a little blood. I've done it before, if it makes you feel better."
"It does not," you replied with sincerity, crossing your arms and standing from your armchair.
He was wearing what he usually wore when he was home. Sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. His hair was unlike the last time you saw him, it hung loose and you just loved it, it made you want to run your fingers through his dark locks.
"Well, if you don't want to have sex tonight, maybe we can chill instead, if you want," he shrugged as he took some aimless steps in your office room.
Your stomach tightened. "What do you mean?"
"We could watch a movie," his hand brushed his hair distractedly.
"I-I was actually about to go out," you blurted.
"Oh, you were?" his eyes scanned you briefly.
"To the drugstore. I'm... running out of supplies," you muttered, feeling your blood run to your cheeks.
He smirked. "Bunny, you don't have to be shy with me. Come on, I'll come with."
"O-okay," you muttered. "Let me get a bag."
It felt weird to walk down to the drugstore with Joshua strolling by your side. Doing simple ordinary things with him was something new to you, since you only saw him in your bedroom, and occasionally on the rooftop of the building you both live in.
When you found yourself wishing he would take your hand, you dug both your hands on the large pocket of your hoodie.
"How did it go? Your book thing," he asked, breaking the ice.
You smiled at his choice of words. "It went well. They want me working on the second book already."
"Oh, that sounds good," he gave you a gentle smile. "But they don't give you like, time to rest or something like that?"
"Well, I screwed up a bit because I was a little ahead of deadline and told them the second book was in the works, so there's no time to rest," you shrugged.
"I get it," he nodded. "I don't get days off either. It's either recording vocals, writing music, networking or something else."
"Did you have to work yesterday too?" you asked with genuine curiosity.
"I went back to the studio because Jihoon wanted me to re-record some lines. We went on a rabbit hole after that 'cause he's nervous about possibly working with major producers. We're self-produced for now," he smiled and rolled his eyes at the memory.
"Was it good though, at the end?"
"Oh, yeah. The perfectionist he is, he didn't stop until he okayed it," he nodded and opened the door of the drugstore for you and you muttered a word of thanks. "And the day before... Sunday. Yeah, I normally go out with my mom—or try to."
"Oh?" you pushed your eyebrows up. "What did you do this time?"
"We had lunch and then visited a botanical garden. Drove her home after that," he told you with an absent smile, probably remembering his day with his mom.
Your heart swelled with fondness. "That sounds really nice, Joshua," you replied, trying not to show the emotion you felt.
"Yeah," he seemed to snap himself from his train of thought, looking up to the aisles. "I don't know where I'm going, I'm following you."
You laughed. "Don't worry, you won't get lost baby boy," you said with an air of confidence as you turned to the aisle where you'd find what you needed.
"Did you just call me baby boy?" he giggled goofily.
You ignored him, throwing in the basket your supplies.
"You told me you needed supplies, bunny. What's this?" he said, looking up to the shelves. "Snacks?"
"These are my supplies," you said with a whine. "Don't judge me."
"I'm not judging," he lifted his palms to your view. "Whatever you need."
"I actually do need to collect something from the counter," you said, fishing your prescription from your pocket but not showing it to him.
"Oh, are you sick?" he inquired as he followed you out of the snacks section and toward the counter.
You kindly handed your prescription to the lady and she handed back birth control pills. Then when it was time to pay, you tried to hide your blushing face to Joshua, who could probably notice your natural shyness kicking in, no matter if he stood behind your back.
"Are you on the pill? Why did you never tell me?" he muttered beside you as you both walked out of the drugstore with your bag full of supplies.
"Not yet," you frowned, though your face felt hot. "In theory and according to this, I begin today," you told him, keeping your eyes glued to the sidewalk.
"I see," he replied, seemingly thoughtful. But then, he asked: "So we're watching movies tonight?"
"Yeah, that'd be nice," you admitted. "It's been ages since I watched a movie at home—or at the cinema, for that matter."
"Cinema," he smiled. "Sometimes I forget that you're an old lady."
"Shut up, Joshua," you scoffed but couldn't help the growing smile on your face.
The only way you could describe your apartment was something akin to a fortress: never short of food or supplies, you had everything you ever needed for entertainment, you worked there most of the time. You were lucky to have made it your little fortress—and well, also you worked hard to keep it that way.
When you got back home with Joshua, you freshened up in the bathroom and changed into comfier clothes and brought a blanket to the living room, where you had a decent tv screen.
"What do you prefer for tonight, princess?" Joshua asked as you returned to the living room wearing your comfiest attire.
"Aren't you choosing tonight?" you asked as you sat beside him on your couch and threw the blanket over your legs.
"What, you're not sharing?" he asked, looking at your fluffy blanket.
"I can bring another blanket for you," you blurted, feeling deeply embarrassed.
"What if I only want to share yours?" he pouted cutely, he even made puppy eyes.
Don't torture me like that, your inner voice pleaded to him. 
"I- we can share," you smiled abashedly. "Sorry, I just didn't think-"
"I'm just playing with you, bunny," he laughed merrily.
You stopped cold. "I- what do I do?" you blurted. "Do you want to share or not?"
"Oh, you sweet thing. Alright, let's share," he exhaled. "We're watching horror, then."
"O-okay," you muttered, feeling deeply flustered at the whole exchange.
The blanket covered you and Joshua perfectly. It was large enough to cover your whole bed. So you confidently propped your feet bundled up in fluffy socks on your coffee table without the blanket falling off or uncovering Joshua.
"You can do the same," you suggested to him after he saw you put your feet up on the surface of your otherwise neat coffee table.
"You're weird," he muttered, but followed you nonetheless, extending his large legs on the coffee table with yours.
"Why?" you frowned.
"You don't seem like the person who would tolerate feet on a table," he laughed. "But you always prove me wrong in something."
You felt your cheeks grow hotter. "What- why? Why does that make me weird? I just wanted to stretch my legs."
"I'm not saying it's a bad thing," he shrugged. "I mean, your apartment is always super clean and you're a bit haughty about certain things so I just thought-"
"I am not haughty!" you gasped.
"Ah, there we go again," he let out his high pitch giggle.
"Shut up, Joshua. You're not perfect either," you muttered with a pout.
"I know, sweetheart," he laughed harder.
"You-you're cocky," you blurted. "You're... you're..."
Joshua arched his eyebrows, waiting for your best worst descriptor.
But you just sighed: "God, you might be perfect."
He laughed harder. "Are you sure you're not ill? Let's take you to the doctor," he joked.
You scoffed. "Ugh, I'll take it back. You're the worst."
"I'm anything but perfect, baby. Far from it, actually. But I appreciate your lukewarm compliment," he said, sliding a hand under the blanket and finding your thigh, to which he gave a gentle squeeze.
With a jolt, you rose from the couch, visibly startling him. "I almost forgot my snacks! D-do you want something to drink?"
You hid yourself in your kitchen and heard his distant reply. "I'll have whatever you're having."
A silent sigh escaped you. You needed to find some kind of rein to your emotions when Joshua was around you.
"Does hot tea and milk sound okay?" you asked.
"Sounds great. Thanks," you heard.
You returned with a tray with two mugs and a plate full of your favorite sweet snacks. Joshua frowned slightly then you set the tray between you and him, setting a clear barrier between you two.
If he noticed you were creating some distance, he didn't say anything. And you silently thanked him for it.
Joshua chose a horror movie. If he did it because he enjoyed horror, he didn't look the part, not one bit. His face wore a frown in disgust throughout the whole thing—and it wasn't only because of gory depictions.
The film was deeply disturbing, to anyone in their right mind, it would seem. But you occasionally giggled at certain moments when Joshua flinched or even jumped on the couch. You never bat an eye, you even found the story a bit flimsy, reliant in shock value and with very evident plot holes.
"That was... something," you muttered as the credits rolled on the screen.
"You are scary," he told you, still looking deeply startled.
You let out a laugh. "Why?"
"You laughed when the lady found out that her daughter was dead!" he pointed with an obvious tone.
"What, it was funny," you shrugged. "I dunno, the face she made was funny. Thought it was a weird cry face."
His mouth parted, frown deepening. "That's psycho talk," he shook his head.
"Chill, it's just a movie," you huffed.
"You pick next time," he rolled his eyes. "But let's not watch horror in a while. I've had my fill."
You laughed. "You want me to hold you?" you teased.
"Yeah, that would be nice. Please and thank you," he mumbled in a low tone.
You realized he seemed serious for a moment. "Wait, you're not joking?"
"Yeah, I am," he laughed. "Unless you want to, though," he nodded at you with a cheeky smile that could only mean that he was now teasing you.
"I'm fine, thanks," you shook your head. "I don't find cultish things scary."
"What do you find scary, then?" he inquired, he leaned his head back on the sofa and turned to see you.
You were eating on your snacks. You were not hungry, just felt the need to keep your hands and mouth busy.
"I... don't know," you replied after a long minute.
"Interesting," he muttered.
"What is?"
"You are," he frowned slightly.
"Were you expecting me to curl up in a ball and ask you to hold me?" you taunted.
"Kind of? Yeah," he said, his eyebrows arched a bit.
"Well, maybe we can keep searching for the one horror movie that makes me want to do that," you suggested with a playful smile on your face.
He narrowed his eyes. "Oh, you might be a bit crazy," he joked. "Lucky for you, I'm a bit crazy too."
"Oh, yeah? And why does that make me the lucky one?"
"Because I might say yes," he muttered with a smirk.
"Deal it is, then," you lifted your chin almost proudly and tended your hand to him.
He shook it contentedly. "Deal. But not tonight, though. Maybe in a month—or two."
Your chest tightened at the sound of that. Time with him, making plans, made your heart flutter in your chest.
"Sure, whenever you're ready, baby boy," you replied with a grin.
He closed his eyes slowly. "God, why did I do to deserve this," he muttered with a downturned smile.
You rolled your eyes, then threw the blanket off your legs. "Bathroom break," you announced for the nth time, since during the movie you had a few. "I'll be back."
When you finally returned, Joshua was fast asleep on your couch, breathing deeply with his arms crossed on his chest.
The sight of it was warm, almost too cute to even process. You felt the urge to grab his cheeks and pinch them or squeeze the air out of his lungs.
Maybe you are crazy.
You picked up the tray from the couch, the barrier that kept his hands away from you and placed it on the kitchen counter, deciding to clean up the following morning.
Deciding on what to do with the large man asleep on your couch, you sat quietly beside him. Twiddling with your fingers. Should you wake him and tell him to go home? Should you suggest that he stay the night? He lived right next door, he could just walk to his bed in less than a minute.
But you wanted him to stay with you.
Then suddenly, he jerked awake with a loud grunt, throwing his hands at you like big claws. "Bwaaah!"
You let out a screech in sheer terror at having him give you the scare of your life. "Goddamnit, Joshua!" you slapped him on his shoulder repeatedly.
He laughed himself silly. "Got you," he muttered with teary eyes, not even trying to dodge or cover himself from your attacks.
"Yeah, yeah," you stuck out your tongue at him, making him laugh harder again.
"You're too cute," he said, wiping a tear from his eye.
"Screw you," you pouted.
He rolled his eyes. "Oof, don't go around saying that. You potty mouth," he teased with a grin still plastered on his stupidly beautiful face.
You scoffed, but fell short of witty replies to give him.
"How are you feeling?" he asked softly.
It took you two seconds to understand what he was referring to.
"Oh, I'm okay. Well, not okay but I just don't feel like dying yet," you muttered with an offhanded air.
He pouted cutely. "I'm going to pretend I know what that means."
Joshua was a few inches away from you, just at hand's reach, but you didn't dare touch him. Even if you were dying to.
You laughed. "I'm fine, Joshua. I can deal with the pain just fine."
"Oh, okay," he shrugged slightly. "I was about to offer a back rub, but given that you're okay..."
"I'd like that," you nodded, feeling your cheeks grow hotter. "I'd like that very much, please."
Joshua grinned. "Lie down, princess," he instructed, patting on his thigh once to indicate the place where he wanted you to lie your head.
You did so, lying on your tummy, head resting on his thigh and stretching your legs on the sofa. His large hands started massaging softly on your lower back, over your comfy clothes.
"Oh, oh? That feels good," you exclaimed, feeling bewildered. "You're really good at this."
"Why do you sound surprised?" he asked and you darted a look at his face, he flashed you a grin as he caught your eye.
"I-I'm not—well a little," you muttered as his hand pressed softly on your lower back alleviating the stress from the cramping you've had all day.
You scrunched up your face when he got to a region that activated your nerves, it didn't exactly hurt, but it made you clench your muscles in response.
"Does that hurt, bunny?" he muttered.
"It feels weird," you replied. "Keep going."
You heard a soft chuckle. "Do you like this?"
He used both hands to rub your lower back, fingers digging at the sides of your hips, applying just the right amount of pressure to your skin to make you groan in satisfaction.
"Yeah. Feels so good," you muttered, closing your eyes.
You could feel yourself letting loose, so much that you weren't aware when you fell asleep on his lap. What woke you up with a start was feeling your drool dripping from your parted lips and onto his lap.
The back rubs had stopped, in fact everything had stilled and when you darted a look up, you found Joshua asleep, still in the same sitting position he was when he was giving you back rubs.
It was 2 AM, you suspected that you had fallen asleep around 11 PM. So Joshua didn't dare move under the risk of waking you up.
He slowly stirred after noticing that you had moved from his lap.
"Hi there," he whispered groggily with the ghost of a smile.
"Let's go to bed," you muttered, not caring that you could simply tell him to go home.
You got up from your couch and dragged him along, silently thanking him for not protesting against your wishes.
He took off his large t-shirt as you threw the bed covers and climbed your bed before he did.
"What?" you asked when you saw him standing by the foot of the bed, his bare torso exposed to your view.
"Do you have an issue if I sleep in my briefs only?" he asked, genuinely curious.
You laughed. "Please. We've slept naked before," you muttered, but he didn't budge. "Yeah, 'm okay with it."
He took his sweatpants off and climbed to your bed, lying next to you.
You instinctively scooted closer to him and he smiled, sliding an arm under your body to drag your body so that now his chest was pressed to your back, his arms circling you so he was practically hugging you from behind.
"Are you feeling better?" he muttered, his nose slightly bumping the back of your ear.
"Yeah. Thank you Shua," you replied, snuggling in his embrace.
"Here to help," he whispered before pressing his lips on your hair.
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The rest of the week went smoothly.
Joshua had taken a liking to texting you when you least expected him to. Sometimes, he'd ask random questions, just to taunt you and make you blush. As if he knew the effect he had on you even without interacting with him in person.
[18:23 PM] joshua: are you free tonight princess? [18:23 PM] joshua: wait don't tell me [18:23 PM] joshua: you're working
You had been keeping him at bay all week by telling him you have to outline book two of your trilogy. Which was true, you unburied some old drafts, but decided that given the fact that book one underwent a lot of changes, book two would have to adopt those changes too.
But the reason why you made yourself busy was to keep yourself away from him. You were too nervous to face him again after that Tuesday night—in which you purely hung out together, no sex.
You let out a sigh.
[18:24 PM] you: I'm free tonight  [18:24 PM] you: Why?
It was now Saturday. You hadn't expected to see Joshua that night, since he usually had something planned during the weekend.
That being said, you totally weren't expecting a call from him.
"Yes?"
"God, you might be an old lady. Who answers the phone by saying 'yes'?" you heard him laugh.
"I'm hanging up," you cooed, trying to hide your smile.
God, how can he get you this flustered already?
"Wait, wait," you heard a giggle. "What are you wearing right now?"
"Really? Really, Joshua?" you gasped.
"No, wait I mean—don't hang up. I'm picking you up in an hour. We're going out," he told you, and you could tell that he was walking hurriedly, his breath hitching up as the buzz from the street filtered through the phone.
Your stomach dropped. "What, where? Jesus, give me some warning next time," you stood up from your desk and went to your bedroom.
"I am giving you a warning, right now. We have a gig tonight and it's a big thing for me. I want you to be there," he spoke in a lower tone, as if not wanting anyone else to hear.
"Well, I'm in my pyjamas. Hope that's fine with you," you joked. You were in fact not wearing pyjamas, but comfy clothes.
"The bunny pjs?" he inquired in a lower tone, but you could tell that he was smiling. "Oh no, sweetheart. I love to see you in that but I'm afraid that's not going to do."
"Well that's what you're getting," you smiled despite the blood rushing to your cheeks.
"Come on, baby. Wear something nice for me?" he purred into your ear. 
You sighed in pure delight and felt lucky that he wasn't there to see that you were aroused already.
"What do you want me to wear?" you almost mewled, not caring about how lewd you sounded.
"Whatever you want, princess. You look good in anything," he muttered.
"I'll wear something cute," you responded, your voice high and almost sweet for him. "And I'll wear something underneath for you only, if you want."
"Fuck, I'm getting hard already," you heard him sigh.
Your eyes widened. "Really?" your voice rose an octave higher. "Why?" you asked innocently.
"Just thinking about you gets me hard," he groaned, but you could tell he was smiling by the sound of his voice.
"Joshua! You're in public! Don't say those things aloud," you chastised him, but couldn't ignore that hearing that made you instantly wet and your core flutter in excitement at his words.
"I just got to my car, princess. Calm down," he laughed faintly. "No one can hear me here. Or see."
"Well, in that case, I'm really, really wet for you right now," you muttered with a sigh as you sat on your bed and slowly lied down.
"Fuck, baby. I love hearing you say that," he purred in a raw tone.
"Yeah? What else do you love hearing me say?" you dared ask.
Maybe your newfound confidence was due to the fact that he wasn't present in your bedroom right now. Your heart was thumping hard against your chest, and your face felt hot at the daring words that were escaping your mouth.
But you didn't care, all your focus was on the voice in your ear.
"I love the way you say my name," he confessed almost sheepishly, as if he was almost admitting that to himself.
"Shua?" you asked, playing dumb. 
"No, no. That's not my name, baby," he muttered in a tone of false reprimand.
"Joshua," you smiled.
"Mmm yeah. I love hearing you say my name. Love it when that's all you can say while I fuck you silly," he admitted, his voice dangerously low.
"Mmm, yeah?" you echoed as your free hand sneaked beneath the band of your sweatpants, burying itself beneath your soaked panties.
You let out a mewling sound when your fingers found your already pooling core.
"Are you touching yourself, princess?" he asked after he heard you sigh in pleasure.
"Yeah," you admitted. Your wet fingertips had already started rubbing circles around your swelling clit. "Wanna come and see for yourself?"
"Fuuuck," you heard him sigh heavily. "I'm a bit far away right now. But I'd love to be there, princess."
"Can y-you talk to me?" you asked with a tiny voice then bit your lip to avoid moaning louder, feeling your legs starting to tense up.
"Are you touching yourself with your fingers?" he asked and you said yes. "God. I'd love to see that one day."
"Yeah? Why?" you asked with a frown.
"I think it's really fucking hot. I want to see you play with your toys until you're spent," he sighed and you imagined him smiling. "I want to hear you say my name while you do it, too."
"You think that I think of you when I touch myself?" you dared ask again as your fingers gently swirled around your sensitive bud.
"You don't?" he bit back.
"Yeah, I do," you admitted despite yourself. "How did you know?"
"Just a small hunch," he sighed, is he smiling?
"I always think of you when I come. I imagine it's you that's making me come," you blurted.
"I'm right next door," he groaned. "You know you can just tell me and I'll be there."
"But what if it's super late?" you pried.
"I don't care,"  he confessed with a low groan.
"Are you touching yourself too?" you asked with a high pitch whine.
"I can't. Not unless I want to be charged for public indecency," he muttered and you could tell he was smiling.
"Are y-you hard?" you asked as your fingers pinched your swollen and slick covered clit.
"Yeah, baby. I am," he sighed. "You've been ignoring me a little this week," he laughed.
Your heart clenched and a moan escaped your lips as your fingers toyed with your clit. "Y-you're not seeing other people, then?"
"You're asking me right now if I'm fucking other girls?" he muttered with a groan that didn't denote his arousal anymore. "Why would I want to do that?"
"I dunno, I figured-"
"You're the only one I'm fucking. I haven't been with anyone else since you," he muttered reproachfully. "We've talked about this before—does this get you off, baby? Do you like to hear that you're the only girl I want?"
"Yeah," you admitted, shutting your eyes close as your body responded with a wave of heat at the sound of his words, you groaned and twitched in your bed a little.
"Is my pretty girl possessive? Is that it?" he muttered again, and in your inner eye you saw him grinning like an idiot.
"Yes, I am," you gasped as your fingers pressed on your clit and massaged it in the only way you knew would get you closer to your sweet release.
"Oh, you greedy, greedy little thing," he tutted. "Are you close, baby? By the way you're breathing I can only assume that-"
"Yes, 'm close, Joshua," you whimpered, your fingers working faster on your clit.
"I wish I could see that right now," he replied. "You don't know how much I've needed you this week."
"Fuck," your legs twitched and a moan coiled in your throat.
"I'd have you every day of the week if you let me, baby," he let out a stressed sigh. "Don't think I would rather have someone else before you."
"Joshua-," you muttered in a broken moan, trying to bite your lip as you came on your fingers, gasping and whining as the wave of pure bliss washed over you, making your jaw go slack and let out his name in low whimpers.
"I know, baby," he muttered as he heard your moans: "I know."
Your body went limp after a long minute and you slowly came back to your senses.
"God, that was embarrassing," you sighed to yourself, moving your hand out of your pants.
He giggled. "Why?"
"I—never mind," you rolled your eyes. "See you in a bit?"
"See you in a bit, bunny," was the last thing he said before you hung up.
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The cold shower you had afterwards served two purposes: a cold slap back to reality and a reflection on your crazy toxic behavior.
Joshua was not your boyfriend. So what if he were fucking other people? Even if he were, you didn't have a say in it. You were just fuckbuddies.
You decided to wear something you thought never would, something you bought on a whim. A little black dress that hugged your body in a flattering way and accentuated your beautiful body, it showed some cleavage, but you felt confident enough to wear it now.
You waited in your living room for Joshua, tapping your fingers impatiently and checking your phone every now and then until you heard him knock, and you ran to get your door.
Joshua pushed through the door, grabbing you instantly by the waist and pushing you to the nearest surface where he could sit you down. The table felt cold against your ass when he set you down harshly, making the skirt of your dress fly up as he slotted himself between your legs.
"I'd take you right here on this table if we didn't have to be somewhere else right now," he said in a low tone, grabbing your chin with his fingers.
"Please do," you urged as his lips locked on yours chastely. "Fuck me, please Joshua, please."
"I think it's your turn to wait now," he muttered with a grin.
"But I need it, please," you whined, wrapping your legs around him.
"Touching yourself an hour ago wasn't enough, baby?" he lifted your chin to angle your head for him to press his lips to your own.
"No. You know it wasn't," you mewled. "I want you to fuck me. Right now," you moaned with a sigh.
Your fingers hooked on the hem of his black jeans and pulled him toward you, sliding his zipper down and undoing the button in one move.
"Fuck baby," he muttered in awe at your wild behaviour as your hand slid beneath his jeans to find him already hard beneath his underwear.
"I need you," you whined, ignoring the awe-struck look on his face.
He grabbed both your wrists and pulled them out of his pants, firmly clasping them together, his hand was large enough to secure them together in his fist as the other hand grabbed you by the jaw gently.
"You have some nerve after ignoring me all week," he muttered darkly. "Now you'll have to wait baby until I say so. Can you do that, sweetheart?"
You looked at his lust-lidded eyes bore into you and his smile slowly appeared on his face as you nodded.
"I can wait," you replied with an innocent tone.
"That's my girl," he cooed and sighed into your lips as he captured them with his own, giving you a heated kiss.
You broke the kiss abruptly and brought up a finger to caress his lower lip that was covered now with your saliva.
"You can fuck me raw now, Joshua," you whispered with a soft smile, almost kicking your feet in the air as you still sat on your table.
The audacity that possessed you to say that was totally new to you, it showed up in your crazy outbursts of assertiveness every time you were near him. Maybe you felt confident enough to be like that with him.
He shuddered slightly, but it was enough for you to see. "We're never getting there if you keep going, princess," he pressed his forehead against yours.
"So you're going to?" you asked, your voice dropped to a whisper.
"If that's what you want, baby," he muttered.
He was already breathing hard, his hands had dropped on your bare thighs, where he had started to knead on your skin anxiously.
"I want to," you replied instantly. "I need you to."
"You're killing me right now," he laughed softly before fixing his pants. "We need to go now, or we'll be regrettably late."
"Fine," you sighed. "Let's go."
He grabbed your head with his hands before crashing his lips with yours briefly but heatedly.
"Let's go," he muttered.
The ride there was longer than you expected. Joshua told you beforehand that his bandmates were already at the location where the event was going to be held.
And as he drove there, he started to get more and more jittery: anxiously licking his lips and tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.
"Are you okay, Shua?" you asked. "You're quiet."
He sent a look your way, but focused on the road ahead. "I'm okay. Just a bit nervous."
You gave him a reassuring smile, although he didn't get the chance to see it. "It's going to be fine. You'll see," you tried to comfort him by placing a hand flatly on his thigh.
He gently grabbed your hand and took it to his lips, pressing them on your knuckles. "Thank you, bunny. That's why I'm bringing you with me tonight."
Your heart fluttered a little. "Yeah? Why is that?"
"You give me good luck," he smirked.
You snorted, trying to play it cool. "You're so corny," you muttered.
He flashed you a downturned smile, briefly looking your way. "Shut up, I'm trying to flirt with you."
"Why? You're driving, there's not much we can do," you laughed, but then your laugh fainted. "Unless you want me to do something for you."
He blinked slowly as he let out a soft laugh. "Are you suggesting to blow me, baby?" he asked incredulously, glancing your way.
You shrugged. "Mmm, yeah. I thought that's where this conversation was headed."
"God, you are terrible at flirting," he said with a low chuckle, but you couldn't ignore how he leaned his head back and shifted on the seat a bit.
"Yeah, shocking," you smiled.
Joshua frowned, but didn't press any further. "I'd accept your proposition," he smiled slightly. "But we're arriving in about two minutes."
"I feel like there's a joke to be made here," you muttered with a smile.
His jaw dropped slightly. "Oh, no. Don't," he laughed.
"I just need one minute," you burst out laughing by the end of the joke.
He rolled his eyes briefly, but his smile was the biggest you've seen. "You have the humor of a child," he said while shaking his head.
You collected yourself, feigning to brush a tear from the corner of your eye.
"Are you done?" he asked, looking torn between amused and disappointed by your bad joke.
"Come on, laugh a little," you pushed his shoulder slightly.
Your joke wasn't even remotely funny, you knew that, but Joshua was still smiling when he parked in a large parking lot There were a lot of cars around and people gathering and walking in groups towards the entrance of a park.
"Where are we?" you asked as you unclasped your seatbelt.
Joshua appeared to be in a hurry, probably reverting back to his state of anxiousness after being distracted successfully by you. "Come on, bunny."
He jumped out of his large jeep and went around it to get your door.
"Oh, what a gentleman. Thanks," you smiled as he offered you a hand to climb down.
"Here," he muttered as his hands clasped on what appeared to be an access pass, which he put around your neck.
"Oh? Thank you, Joshua," you grabbed the tag to read that it was an all access pass.
"Don't mention it," you looked up to see a light smile on his face. "Follow me."
He led you to the side entrance which was fenced off, a sign at the entrance reading "AUTHORIZED ONLY" and you practically followed him through the maze of sound and lighting equipment carefully arranged on the floor.
There was a lot to be on the lookout for as you tried to keep up with him. There were rows of cables taped or secured to the ground that you almost tripped over.
Joshua seemed to notice your struggle and reached out to grab your hand firmly. "Careful, princess," he showed you a downturned smile, jittery eyes glancing down to his large hand grabbing yours. "Is this okay?"
You felt your heartbeat on your throat as you could only muster up a nod. "Yeah," you breathed, holding onto his hand.
The place he was walking through and to which he was practically dragging you with him was a large tent with long tables, people gathered around, chatting and drinking.
The smell of weed and tobacco permeated the air, laughter and the hum of the crowd with that of the music in the distance filled your ears.
"There you are, Shuji—oh, I see why you're late," Jihoon politely nodded your way and waved.
"Hi," you waved back shyly.
Joshua released your hand gently, smoothly using it to fix his dark hair with a labored sigh. "I thought I was on time," he frowned. "Isn't our go in an hour?"
"Yes, but we were asked for our instruments for soundcheck half an hour ago," the drummer shook his head nervously.
"And?" Joshua smiled playfully. "Did you need me to do that?"
"No, I don't need you, I'm just—forget it. In thirty minutes we go backstage for them to mic us up," he informed, just as jittery as you saw Joshua some minutes ago.
"Got it. Thanks Jihoon," he nodded and then turned to you. "You get drinks and food with your pass. I have to stay here, but you're free if you want to explore the festival," he tugged at the access pass hanging on your neck.
"Right, okay," you pressed your lips into a smile.
"We can meet back here once our gig is over," he offered. "Or I can join you where you are."
You looked up at his doe eyes. "You're going to do great, Joshua," you smiled reassuringly.
God, you wanted to kiss him so bad. In front of everyone, you didn't care who saw. But you also felt pathetic, anxiously eyeing his plump lips then back at his curious eyes.
He read you well. With a soft smile, his hand slid in the nape of your neck to hold you in place as he dipped his head to kiss you sweetly, one peck, then another. A sigh falling on your parted lips as he tenderly slid his lips in between your own.
"I'll be in the crowd," you promised with the faintest voice.
"I'll look for you," he smiled slightly at you, meeting your gaze with such fondness that you almost forgot where you were.
"I better be there then," you smirked at him, trying to contain your eagerness.
"Look at you being flirty with me," his smile grew and you almost died inside when his eyes turned into two crescent moons from how happy he looked.
"I–that wasn't flirting," you stuttered. "I'd better get going so you can get ready," you pulled away awkwardly.
Your heart sank as the smile on his face slowly faded.
Joshua looked at you the way he always did when he figured you out, but just nodded with his head, if he had anything else to say, he kept it to himself.
"See you in a bit?" he asked with a playful smile.
"See you in a bit, Shua," you smiled back and turned around and followed your way back through the crowds of artists and crew men and women and into the actual music festival.
The sun had already dipped, the chill of the air in the beautiful park surrounded by tall trees seemed to be setting in despite the huge crowds of people amassing around the stages, those which were three in total.
In your little exploration around the merch and food stalls, you found out that Midnight Haze were presenting on the main stage, two bands before the headliners. So that's why Joshua looked reasonably anxious: this was hugely important for a local band such as his.
You thought that this could prove an opportunity for them to be scouted for plenty more gigs. And you hoped that would be the case. You honestly wished for his band to have more recognition, they deserved it.
You explored all the food stalls, not feeling really hungry but yet indulging in what appealed to you the most. Everything was free for you, having an all access pass circling your neck, but you didn't feel the need to overuse it.
Except for strawberry mojitos, you were sipping on the third one by the time you circled back toward the big stage, showing your pass to security and they pointed you to the VIP section, directly in front of the stage where Joshua's mic stand stood.
Behind the mic stand the stage crew rolled a platform with Jihoon's bright red drum set, surrounded by a number of large cymbals. The crew expertly made a brief soundcheck and left. Your stomach tightened in excitement for the members of Midnight Haze, not just Joshua.
It seemed they had a plan, Jihoon stepped on the stage first, walking to the platform the crew had set with his large drum set. He sat on the stool and shifted a bit, finding his preferred way of sitting.
You spotted Vernon's bass guitar carefully placed on a guitar stand. It was white and had stickers all over it, some of them had washed over around the pickup area. When he picked it up and threw the red strap around his shoulder he also seemed to shift and get ready.
The crowd pushed you softly around as the people around you moved to get closer to the fences. Even if you stood in the VIP section, it was completely packed, the murmur of the crowd rose, some people whistled loudly impatiently.
When Joshua stepped under the stage lights, the crowd went completely insane. The large screens framing the stage showed the full stage, now complete with the lead singer as he grabbed a white guitar, lifting the strap to place it on one of his shoulders.
Joshua turned around and you saw him nodding his head at Jihoon, who returned the gesture at him to then raise his arms in the air to clash his drumsticks three times before starting off with a loud bang.
The booming sound of the towers of speakers filled your body, vibrating in your insides and making your bones feel the energy that instantly ignited the crowd, including you.
Midnight Haze started their set with one of their songs you liked the most. And you were pleased to see that Joshua smiled as he sang to the lyrics of the song.
The electrifying presence of the lead singer was so mind boggling to you, for a second it didn't seem like you were seeing your next door neighbor singing and playing his guitar as he danced side to side, banging his head slightly to the beat.
People screamed and applauded as the first song came to its end and Joshua bowed his head politely. Then he paused to remove one of his in-ear pieces to listen to the cheering of the crowd properly. He approached the stand, wrapping one hand around the mic.
"How's it going Rock Fest?" his voice boomed with excitement, a small chuckle came out of his plump lips when the crowd responded with wordless screams.
"We're Midnight Haze and we're really excited to be here," Joshua spoke into the mic, his starry eyes lost in the sea of faces, marveling at the sight of how extensive the crowd was.
"I want to see you all singing and dancing. Come on!" he screamed energetically just as the music swept in again.  
You cheerily sung along all of the songs in their set list, swaying your body mindlessly from side to side, looking over at the stage where Joshua also sang and played his guitar.
He looked devastatingly beautiful. His big eyes closed briefly, his brow furrowing slightly in focus, the vein in his neck popping up as he sang his lungs out.
The stage lights bathed his face with red and pink lights as the music wrapped him in a moment for his guitar solo, he looked hypnotic to you, almost heavenly.
You were so attracted to him you felt like a moth flying straight into the flame. You simply couldn't contain your urge to grab your phone and snap a photo of the moment.
God, you're screwed for life, you realized as you watched him.
Their setlist was about to come to a wrap after another one of your favorite songs ended on a strenuous note and Joshua's eyes went through the sea of faces. The stage lights danced around and pointed at the crowd at the same time his eyes zeroed on you, his brow relaxed and he smiled slightly.
"We've come to our last song," he spoke into the mic, his smile broadening when the crowd responded in wordless discontent. "We thank you for being here and for being such an amazing crowd," he paused, seemingly enjoying the roar of the sea of people in front of him. "We were Midnight Haze. Thank you, Rock Fest!!"
They started playing what their last song was, which was a song that you didn't know yet and apparently was a new song, since no one around you seemed to sing along with Joshua, who kept his big smile throughout as he sang and danced around the stage with his guitar.
He looked at you once as he strolled with his guitar directly in front of you. The people standing behind you screamed in your ears and you smiled at the sheer commotion he caused just by stopping by.
You twiddled your fingers at him, which he caught immediately and nodded his head at you, smiling tiredly with his tongue dangling between his chapped lips.
"He's so fucking hot oh my god," someone said with a raw voice from screaming, you turned and you saw two girls holding each other in excitement from the brief exchange.
It was amusing to think that you weren't the only one subdued by the beauty of the lead singer. It was also somewhat amusing that you were exhilarated at the fact that he singled you out from the crowd, but obviously no one around you knew that.
Joshua returned to the mic to sing the last verse, to then thank the other two members of Midnight Haze and say goodbye, promptly leaving the stage as the crowd screamed and applauded for them.
You quickly made your way out of the VIP section and found the nearest entrance back to the tent where you last saw Joshua. There were still some people hanging out in the tent, though admittedly not as many stuck around, possibly enjoying the festival and the food.
When Joshua came back, he looked a mixture of euphoric, tired and happy. As he spotted you, he opened his arms in excitement and you threw yourself in his embrace, lifting you in the air as your lips met briefly in an affectionate kiss.
"You were amazing," you told him, looking at his face briefly before he returned you to the ground.
Then you slowly came to your senses and stepped back from him slightly.
"You think so?" he asked, unaware of your sudden change in behavior. "Cause that felt amazing! That was the largest crowd we've ever performed for."
Your heart swelled at seeing him so excited, he grabbed you by the shoulders and shook you and you laughed at the crazed energy he still had from the stage.
"Come with me," he grabbed you by your hand as he led you out of the tent and to an even larger tent that was more crowded than the one you just left and right behind the stage.
It looked somewhat like a private party, the people in there, the majority of them, looked already intoxicated. The atmosphere was one of fun and a bit of mischief, however, you couldn't help but think that the energy of the packed room wasn't exactly inviting. Despite being hand in hand with the lead singer of one of the bands that had just come off the stage.
Your innate shy behavior kicked in, and you partially hid yourself behind Joshua, lowering your gaze as people not only looked at him, but also noticed you.
Joshua finally found the rest of his bandmates, who were already drinking a beer and talking about the very fresh experience. Jihoon, naturally, was retelling everything that just happened to a couple of faces you've never met before.
"Ah, there you are, Josh," one of them said, which was a woman. "We were wondering about you."
"Sorry, I had to go collect her," he nodded towards you. He then introduced you to the couple of strangers by name. "They're Chaewon and Taewon, from Wilted Willows."
"Hi," you waved at them, pressing your lips into a shy smile. You briefly saw the last bits of their performance, which was very unlike Midnight Haze's.
Chaewon's dark eyes scanned you up and down, making the hairs on the back of your neck prickle.
"Is she your new girlfriend?" she asked bluntly, her eyes moving from your face to Joshua's face.
"Oof, this is going to get weird," Jihoon muttered beside you and sipped from his can of coke zero.
Joshua released your hand. "No," he responded flatly, clearly setting a boundary between him and Chaewon. Then you felt his arm sliding on your shoulders, pulling your body into a tight side hug. "Not yet, at least."
Your stomach dropped, your gaze met his and he immediately winked an eye at you, a thing for your eyes to see only.
"Mmph," the girl flipped her luscious blue hair aside. "When you get bored of that, you know where to find me."
It happened fast: Chaewon took a step forward, her lithe fingers reached out to Joshua's chin, and he instantly pulled back with a flinch, his arm pulling you closer to him as an act of instinctive protectiveness.
Looking deeply startled and just about when he seemed like he was going to tell her off, she left and her bandmate had no choice but to leave with her after the deeply alarming exchange.
Joshua released a labored sigh. "Seriously, Jihoon?" he dropped the arm from your shoulders.
"What, they came to me," he shrugged. "I didn't know she was going to pull all that."
"Who is she... is she your ex?" you asked, trying to appear fine and controlled.
"No. God, no," Joshua shook his head furiously. "She's just really self-absorbed."
"She is also obsessed with Shua. Crazy stalker level of obsession," Jihoon explained briefly.
"Ah," you frowned.
The only reason why you thought she might've been Joshua's ex was because of how comfortable she was to attempt to put her hands on him.
Even if she were his ex, she overstepped by trying to touch him like that.
"Fucking hell," Jihoon muttered to himself, spotting something in between the groups of people. "Vernon's getting fucked up again."
Jihoon left abruptly, towards the direction of the bassist. Leaving you and Joshua alone. 
"I'm so sorry about that," Joshua's face had contorted into a frown. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," you smiled calmly despite yourself, trying to not let your anger show. "That was unsettling."
"Yeah, I agree. Really disturbing," he sighed again, running a hand through his dark hair.
"I'm sorry you have to deal with that, Joshua," you offered with a downturned smile.
"Don't be," he shook his head. "I'm more worried about you, she undermined you and I couldn't say anything about it."
"But I'm unaffected," you countered. "Her problem is not with me, that much is evident."
He flashed you a relaxed smile. "Sorry about the girlfriend stuff, I panicked."
A sudden painful feeling made you almost flinch. "Don't worry, Shua. I would've panicked a little too."
But you were thankful that he was being honest. He still looked agitated from the unfortunate exchange, but his shoulders went slack when you reached out to grab his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.
"Hey, don't let that ruin your night," you told him encouragingly.
"Yeah, no, I'm fine," he frowned.
"You want me to fuck her up?" you asked bluntly.
His doe eyes widened. "What?!" then he understood you were joking and laughed hard, almost bending over with laughter. "Where did that come from?"
You broke your act and smiled at him. "I wanted to make you laugh. It worked," you shrugged.
"You fighting... now that would be fun to see," he admitted with a smile. "Fun and weird. Can't imagine you doing that."
"Well, don't try me," you quipped.
He chuckled again, brushing a tear from his eye.
A bunch of people stopped by to say hi to him and you stood idly by, watching Joshua expertly navigate through small talks, compliments and questions. And though you mostly didn't get attention within these exchanges, you were happy to be there, experiencing him.
"You are famous," you pointed, impressed by the amount of people that came to say hello and even take pictures with him.
"I'm not famous, bunny. This is kind of a network, everyone here knows everyone," he explained, but the tip of his ears were red.
"Right," you scoffed. "I don't see a lot of people asking others for their photo."
He rolled his eyes. "Shut up, it makes me feel weird."
"Are you blushing?" you gasped dramatically. "The Joshua Hong is blushing?!"
He arched his pierced eyebrow at you. "Don't make fun of me," he muttered shyly but you just couldn't help but laugh at how cute he looked when flustered. 
"Aw, baby boy is shy?" you pouted at him.
He blinked slowly, biting his lower lip to attempt and stop his smile. "This is the last time I bring you to something like this."
You simply continued. "Can I get your photo, Shua? Joshie, can I get your autograph?" you laughed as his smile grew, rolling his eyes at you again.
Joshua nodded at you once, letting out a breath through a smirk. "Having fun?"
A shiver ran down your spine. "A bit, if I'm honest," you admitted, but were actually more excited about his sudden change in attitude.
"Alright, princess. Let's have fun," he muttered, clasping his hand around yours to drag you once again through the crowd of people and outside the tent.
"Joshua!" you squealed, your smile had since vanished from your face as you looked around to see that he was dragging you towards a line of parked bus trailers.
You assumed that there was no one around since Joshua confidently shoved your back against the side of a bus trailer, making you gasp at the sheer force he used with you.
His eyes widened in disbelief when you smiled at him deviously. "You wanted this," he realized. "Do you enjoy this, baby?"
"I do," you nodded, breathing hard in anticipation already as Joshua closed in on you.
His fingers grazed your chin. "You want me to toss you around, pretty?" he asked, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly.
A shudder ran through your body. "Yeah," you sighed. "I want you to do whatever you want to me, Joshua."
Joshua looked at you in pure fascination, he even let out a soft sigh that brushed your face slightly.
"You..." he breathed but stopped, seemingly at a loss of words.
His head dipped and you closed your eyes, blindly grabbing his head with your hands as he kissed you hard on your lips. 
"I want you, Joshua," you whimpered into his hot mouth, the words felt urgent as you uttered them. "Now."
"What if someone sees?" he incited, his voice low and raspy.
"I don't care," you confessed, the statement shaking deep in your bones.
The fleeting confidence in you stirred something in your brain, telling you to act quick.
It was your turn to push him against the bus trailer behind him. He gasped in surprise as his back hit the metal wall, his eyebrow raising a bit.
You clasped your lips with his, earning a low groan from him that reverberated in his chest and against your hands that were sliding down to the belt of his pants.
"What are you doing?" he asked, his hands stopping you.
You faltered instantly. "I-I want to suck you off," your eyes read his face. "Can I?"
His hand released one of yours to cup your chin. "Why?"
You frowned. "Why, what do you mean, why?"
He nodded briefly. "Tell me you're not doing this because you feel bad for what happened earlier in the tent."
"I want to pleasure you," you explained, then you quickly relaxed, understanding the situation. "Don't think I'm doing this for any other reason than just for you."
His eyes scanned your face, his other hand released you to graze your cheek with his knuckles, the features of his face relaxing. "What's our safeword, bunny?"
You blinked slowly, showing him a smile before giving him your safeword.
"Fuck," he let out a puffy breath as your fingers resumed undoing his belt, to then get the button of his black jeans.
"You're so hard already," you cooed softly, and eyed him as your hand felt him over his underwear.
Joshua was biting his lower lip, looking strained already. "All for you, sweetheart."
You smiled at him sweetly. "Such a sweet talker," you tilted your head as you rubbed his hard cock through his underwear.
You stuck your hand through the slit of his boxers, grabbing his hard cock firmly and effectively pulling it free from the stretchy and wet fabric of his underwear. 
"You're being so naughty, princess," he chuckled at you faintly but he faltered completely as you lowered yourself to your knees before him.
The ground was hard against the soft skin of your knees, the thin layer of your stockings was not enough to protect them. But you knew you wanted to see the bruises by the following morning.
"Fuck," he muttered again, shuddering visibly when you kissed the tip of his cock, to then press your tongue on the slit to lick his precum as you locked eyes with him.
One large hand cupped your cheek, his eyes trained on you as your tongue gave a few strokes to his shaft, feeling the vein that marked in the underside, tracing a long line with your tongue until you wrapped your mouth around his cockhead.
You heard a low guttural groan leave him when you took him deeper in your mouth than you could before, your tongue lapping on the length of him as you moved your head back and forth. 
Darting a look at him, Joshua leaned his head back on the wall behind him, eyes closed and swallowing hard as you bobbed your head back and forth on his throbbing cock, swirling your tongue around his cockhead.
"God. Your mouth feels so, so fucking good, baby," he moaned faintly, his hands grabbing a handful of your hair.
The back of your mouth had started to hurt already from the intrusion each time you tried to take his cock deeper in your mouth. But you didn't care, all focus was in getting more sounds of approval from him. Sounds that were also making you aroused. 
Drool had started to drip down from the corners of your lips and onto your chin, wet sounds coming every time you pulled your head back, hollowing your cheeks to suck hard on his cock just as if it were a lolly.
"Fuck," he exhaled. "You don't know how much I needed you, baby."
A moan coiled in your throat, your walls throbbing desperately at the sound of his words. Your chest swelled proud when you felt his fingers tense up on your hair and you heard him moan faintly, cussing and muttering incoherently about your mouth and how good it felt.
"Fuck, fuck—I think someone's coming," he whispered but didn't make an attempt of stopping you, so you didn't.
Voices echoed in the distance, but you couldn't make out if someone actually saw you and Joshua. There was no actual acknowledgement towards what you were doing, but you felt euphoric all the same.
Being on your knees for him, sucking him off for anyone to see made you moan on his cock. You sneaked a look at Joshua's eyes, that were trained on you while your head bobbed back and forth, committed to the act of pleasuring him.
"Someone just saw you giving me head," his voice sounded raw. "You like this, don't you? Like taking my cock in your mouth for anyone to see."
You moaned a sound of confirmation, making the smile on his face grow just a little. He let out a weak sigh, the tension in his beautiful features showing that he was close.
"I'm close," he sighed and threw his head back a bit. His hand tightened on your hair slightly when you sucked him harder. "Fuck, baby. D'you want me to cum in your pretty mouth?" his thumb brushed your cheekbone gently, as if calling for your attention back to him.
You blinked at him, moaning the same sound again.
"Can I move, princess? You think you're ready for that?" he asked, his face and voice both strained.
You nodded with your head as you pulled your mouth back to suck on his cockhead, blinking an adoring look up at him.
"Tap my thigh if you need me to stop," he grabbed your head firmly and started thrusting his cock on your mouth.
Sloppily at first, almost as if he wanted you to adjust your mouth to his pace as he started to push his cock down your throat faster. You lifted your eyes to see his face deep in focus, probably containing himself to avoid hurting you by accident.
The feeling was so deeply arousing that you were tempted to sneak a hand between your legs and start touching yourself. But you were rendered immobile, not by his hands precisely, but by the sight of him fucking your mouth.
"Fuck, baby—I'm cumming. You're gonna take it all, right baby? Gonna swallow it all?" he groaned, revelling at the sight of you taking his cock, your eyes brimming with tears, your chin dripping with your own drool.
You were gagging loudly on his cock, but managed to get the slightest of nods.
"Yeah, you are," he cooed faintly when he saw the way you responded to his words.
Then he threw his head back, his face contorted in pure pleasure and you almost swore you could come from the sight alone. 
"God, fuck," his voice was a mere whisper as his cockhead bumped on the back of your mouth, his cum spurting down your throat and you instantly swallowed it.
Joshua groaned through clenched teeth as you swallowed the last drops of his cum, he screwed his eyes shut, exhaling elatedly at the same time that his hands gently released your hair.
"That was insane," he muttered slowly, appearing to come to his senses.
Gently, he pulled out of your mouth, a string of saliva falling out of your mouth and landed on your chin. He fixed his pants quickly before grabbing your hands that were previously resting on his thighs.
Joshua helped you stand up and immediately wrapped you in a tight embrace. Bringing a hand up to clean your face from your drool and tears.
"You did so good, bunny," he muttered in your lips after kissing you chastely. "So fucking good."
"'m glad you liked it," you smiled in his lips.
"Let's take you home, princess. I want to make you feel good too," he gave you small pecks on your lips. "Is that okay?"
"Can't you take me here? Right now?" you whined jokingly.
"No, baby," he whispered into your lips. "As much as I'm dying to do that right now, I don't want to risk anyone seeing you."
"But you didn't have an issue with it five minutes ago," you quipped.
"Yeah, but that was different. You were fully clothed and the person who saw us didn't see our faces," he pointed. 
"So the problem is that you don't want anyone to see me naked?" you pulled back to meet his gaze. "In that case I can keep my dress on." 
The conversation had shifted between you, and you could tell that he was no longer trying to keep you aroused—he didn't even look like he just got blown. You didn't know what it was, but it troubled him.
Joshua looked up at the night sky, seemingly looking frustrated for a second as he looked for words to say.
"What if I'm a little possessive too?" he asked, meeting your eyes.
You physically recoiled in his arms in a mixture of excitement and uneasiness. "W-what?" you blurted in disbelief.
"What if I don't want anyone seeing what I have with you?" his eyes searched your face. "Even if you kept your dress on, I don't want anyone seeing how good you are for me."
Your heart dropped, pain sinking into your chest. This was totally not what you expected to hear from him. Even if his possessiveness was entirely revolving around a sexual aspect, you weren't ready to hear it.
"Joshua-," you started.
"I know I said that I'd fuck you anywhere but I just can't give you that right now," he smiled, seemingly ashamed of his words.
"No, it's alright," you frowned. "It's just really confusing hearing you say this."
"What, you don't think I'm capable of feeling a little jealous too?" he asked. "You don't like the idea of me seeing other girls, I don't like the idea of someone seeing you."
Was this something you needed to talk in more depth with him? Totally, yes. Were you going to ask him to do so? No, probably not ever.
"Fair," you muttered, mustering a smile to him before capturing his lips with your own. "Take me home, then."
Joshua took your hand again, making your tummy flutter with nervousness that only intensified when he led you back to the tent.
As you both pushed through Joshua's friends and unknown faces, you swore that everyone looked at you differently; not in a bad or good way precisely, just different. As though everyone knew why you and Joshua disappeared, and judging by the fact that someone saw you, they probably did already.
Joshua kept you close, almost as though wanting to make his point across—he felt possessive of you. And you didn't want to know to which extent he felt like this over you. 
But you knew one thing, whatever it was that made him look this deeply troubled, paired with your unspoken feelings for him was starting to taint your already messy relationship of fuckbuddies.
Joshua drove faster this time around, keeping a hand on the wheel and the other placed flatly on your thigh.
"Did you enjoy the festival?" he asked, his thumb had started to draw invisible circles on your thigh.
"I did," you smiled. "Drank mojitos and ate corn dogs," you told him, looking at his large hand. You resisted the urge to grab it and lace your fingers with his.
"Mojitos?"
"Strawberry mojitos," you added. "I took some photos too, of you, on stage."
"You did? Will you show me?" he eyed you excitedly.
"Of course," you smiled at him.
"So you got a good spot to see me?"
"Yeah I got to see you throughout the whole set," you saw him smile faintly.
"I saw you singing along," he seemed to remember suddenly. "You've been listening to our music."
"Yeah," you admitted. "Almost everyday. Does that make me your groupie?"
He chuckled. "I'm convinced that you don't know what a groupie is, bunny."
"Shuddup," you smiled.
"Hey, but it's not fair—you can listen to my music but I haven't read your book," he frowned.
"I'll lend you the hardcopy of my manuscript," you promised.
"I actually looked for you, do you use a pen name?"
Your heart sank. He took the time to search your books using your real name?
You told him your pseudonym and he repeated each name silently and nodded. 
"Yeah, I might've confused the lady at the local library," he laughed.
"You went to the library looking for my books using my real name," he nodded and you laughed. "You should've asked me first."
"You never answer my texts on time," he reproached. "Well but I wanted it to be a secret, actually."
"Why?" you frowned.
"I wanted to impress you," he shrugged.
"You don't have to, Joshua," you told him sincerely.
"But I want to," he pouted cutely. "And now that I know you've been listening to my music, I feel like I have to catch up with you."
"I like your music. I'm not sure if you're going to like my books," you warned him.
"Let me decide that," he smiled at you.
Joshua parked his car expertly with one hand, his other hand still resting on your thigh. He had stopped rubbing circles through the thin fabric of your stockings, but your skin felt hot at his touch nonetheless.
Your fingers fidgeted nervously with the hem of the skirt of your little black dress as you stepped on the elevator, Joshua stood closely behind you.
"Are you nervous?" he asked in your ear, leaning closer to you.
"A bit," you breathed, turning on your feet to see his face.
"Why?" he slowly smirked. "We've done this before."
You were lucky that no one else was in that elevator, but you still waited until you got to your apartment to continue that conversation.
Joshua gently pushed you against the wall as soon as he closed your apartment door.
"Mm? Why are you nervous, bunny?" he asked in a soft tone.
"I've never been fucked raw," you confessed, fighting the blush that crept immediately on your face.
His eyes searched your face briefly. "We don't have to do that tonight, we can use protection."
"No, don't get me wrong—I want to... do it raw," you breathed, your hands fidgeting with the collar of his meshy black shirt. "I'm just..."
You bit your tongue. You felt excited to try new things with Joshua, and what really got you feeling that way was that you were trying these things with someone you were actually falling in love with.
"What?" he egged you on, his curious eyes still trying to read your face.
You licked your lips anxiously and shook your head, reluctant to continue.
"We can take it slow, if that's what you want," he offered.
"No, do-don't hold back," you stuttered. "I want everything."
"I got you. Don't worry," he muttered before placing two fingers to grab your chin and leaned to kiss you.
You melted into his lips, feeling every nerve in your body respond at his touch when he slid his other hand on your waist, giving it a soft squeeze.
"I almost forgot to tell you," he breathed after pulling back from your lips. "You looked beautiful tonight, baby."
"Did you like my dress?" you darted a look down to your little black dress.
"Thank you for wearing it tonight," he grazed your cheek. "I liked it very much." 
"It's a good thing I didn't wear the bunny pjs then," you smirked though your blushing face.
He laughed faintly. "Yeah, good thing," he echoed dazedly, leaning to kiss you again.
God, if you could only just ask him. Does he feel the same way too? When your mouths join, when you breathe against each other, moaning and gasping at the slightest of touches against each other's skin.
Your fingers started undoing the buttons of his shirt, your hands sneaking between the split of his shirt to feel his hard chest, the defined muscles of his pecs.
Joshua moaned into your lips, his hands sliding from your waist to find your hips. His hot mouth placed open mouthed kisses on your chin, groaning in approval when you tilted your head back for him to kiss on the underside of your jaw.
Your back was pressed against the wall as his hands searched for your thighs and expertly lifted you up from the floor. You let out a squeal in surprise, your arms instantly locking around his shoulders.
A laugh in sheer joy left your lips when he carried you to your room. "We could've walked here."
"Shh, let me do nice things for you," he muttered as he let you back to the floor of your room and you got to the lamp on your nightstand.
He grabbed you by your waist, pulling you to his body as he sat down on your bed, leveling down to see eye to eye with you. His large hand slid on the nape of your neck as his lips found yours, tenderly locking you into a kiss.
Joshua was still wearing his shirt on his shoulders, the split parting as your fingers caressed the defined lines of the muscles on his abdomen, and then he moaned on your mouth when you reached his lats, that being a sensitive area for him.
"How do I get you out of this?" he smiled sheepishly when his fingers searched on your back and then on your sides.
"It's a slip dress," you explained, smiling too.
Your fingers grabbed the shoulder straps, sliding them from your arms and the dress simply fell from your frame, leaving your body with the light pink lingerie set you chose for tonight.
"Do you like it?" you asked sheepishly when he seemed unable to look back at your eyes.
Joshua swallowed hard, tearing his doe eyes from the lacey fabric barely covering your body and found your expectant eyes. "Yeah, baby," he released a breath through a weak smile. "I love it."
Your hands went to grab the clasp of your pretty bra, but he raised a hand from your waist.
"No, not yet," he muttered. "I want to take it off myself. Is that okay?"
"Yeah. More than okay," you sighed, repurposing your hands to remove his meshy black shirt from his shoulders, caressing his beautiful skin in the process.
His large hands busied themselves exploring your bare skin too, what your thigh high stockings didn't cover, caressing your bare waist as he leaned to press wet kisses down your chest, to the swell of your breasts.
"So beautiful," he muttered, as if to himself.
"Joshua," you moaned with a sigh as his hands circled on your back and slid down to cup your ass with a low guttural groan from his part.
"Don't rush this," he muttered against your skin, then glanced up to meet your eyes.
"Okay," you breathed, your skin already prickled and covered in goosebumps.
He smiled, his fingers reaching up to graze your chin. "We have all night, you don't have to rush anything."
"Oh, so you're going to fuck me all night?" you quipped with a grin.
"If that's what you want," he replied with a small shrug.
"I do. But what do you want, Joshua?" you retorted.
His gaze darkened as it met yours, he seemed to struggle with his words for the second time in the night, something that did not go unnoticed by you, but you decided not to make a big deal of it at the time.
Joshua didn't reply to your question verbally, instead he stood from your bed, your eyes following him now that he regained his natural height, now his frame towered over you.
He pushed you to sit on the bed, wordlessly making you understand that the roles were reversed for now and you resumed to undress him. Undoing his belt and button from his black jeans, hooking your fingers to push his jeans down on his legs for him to step out of them, socks included.
It was your turn to swallow hard at the sight of him nearly naked. He was hard already, as you could see the bulge in his underwear, your hand instantly rubbing his hard cock through the stretchy fabric.
"Lie down, princess," he muttered, nodding to the bed.
You scooted back on your bed covers and lied down as Joshua climbed on top of your body.
"Are you okay?" you asked, your voice laced with a bit of concern.
"Yeah," he breathed, pressing a kiss on your lower lip. "Never better."
He grabbed your legs and you wrapped them around his body, pressing down on his hips to join them with yours, earning a soft moan from him.
"Joshua?" you breathed when his lips trailed from your mouth, pressing wet kisses down the crook of your neck.
"Mm?"
"Ca-can I be on top?" you asked.
"Do you want to ride me, baby? Is that what you're asking?" he asked with his sweet voice.
"Let me be on top," you muttered, lowering your legs from his body.
He laughed against your skin. "Okay," he sighed, rolling over so his back was fully against the bed and you followed his body promptly, straddling him.
You wasted no time, leaning your body to press your chest against his, burying your fingers in his black hair before capturing his lips with yours.
His hands caressed your back, the pads of his fingers tracing the line of your column and stopping only to unclasp your pretty bra, his hands removed it completely, you heard when it landed on the floor.
His breath hitched when you pressed your tits against his hard chest, moving your lips to kiss his chin, then under his jaw and  down the crook of his neck, essentially mimicking what he does when he's on top of you.
"Can I mark you?" you asked shyly, darting a look to his face.
A small groan fell from his lips as he nodded with his head. "Yeah," he whispered with a light smile.
You returned the smile as your head dipped on the crook of his neck, his hands kneading on your hips as you landed love bites on the crook of his neck, his throat and finally reaching his toned chest.
Joshua was sensitive. It made you feel so stupid to realize it this far into your countless sexual encounters. He so rarely let you touch him during sex or kiss him that you never knew just how sensitive he actually was.
His hands were going to leave marks on your skin, you were sure of it. Kneading on your ass and hips, fingers digging harshly on your skin as you took your time marking his chest, marveling at the sight of his toned pecs.
"Fuck," he breathed softly, his eyes were closed tightly, so he never saw you smile at his downright restless behaviour. You and him had that in common, at least.
You couldn't ignore how big and hard he felt under you, so you started grinding on him to maybe help him release the growing tension on his cock.
Then you wanted to try something—you ran your tongue on one of his sides, feeling his toned lats, tasting cologne in his skin.
"Mmn—fuck!" his body hardened, his fingers threatening to pierce your skin.
The tip of your tongue traced a circle around one of his nipples to then press your wet lips and repeated the same actions on his other side, earning similar reactions.
A groan bubbled in his chest and suddenly you were being flipped to your back, startled you looked at his dark eyes. Unable to say a word, his mouth was already clashing with yours, kissing you fervently.
"Are you going to tie me up tonight?" you asked shyly.
His pierced eyebrow arched slightly. "Do you think you deserve it, pretty? Have you been bad?"
"Mmm, maybe a little," you admitted.
"Mmm yeah, I remember that you were, baby. Do you like being bratty? Do you like being tied up?" his fingers hooked on the thin fabric of your thong, pulling his body back to slide the thong down your legs, leaving your stockings on.
"Yeah, I do," you breathed, your eyes trained on him as he pressed soft kisses on the softer side of your thighs.
"Then I won't tie you tonight, princess," he smiled deviously to then run the tip of his tongue on the sensitive side of your thigh, dangerously close to your core.
You let out a soft whimper, your body tensed up and your legs instinctively closed a bit, one of your legs bumped with the side of his head.
"Maybe I'll get restraints for your legs too," he quipped, laughing softly. "Would you like that, baby?"
You swallowed hard, closing your eyes when he continued placing loving and soft kisses on your mound. "Mm, I think so," you muttered clumsily.
He used his hands to splay your thighs open for him, dipping his head on your mound to place wet kisses on your soft skin, sighing in the process of kissing your pussy lips, groaning softly with you when he heard you moan and whine.
"Joshua," you called softly when his tongue swiped a line between your folds, humming in response at the taste of your arousal.
One of his hands slotted in your lower tummy, while the other one remained holding your thigh. His face was practically buried in your cunt, slowly licking every inch of it, dipping the tip of his tongue on your entrance to make you cry out and moan his name.
You held onto his hand that was on your tummy when his tongue swirled around your clit a few times. "Oh god," you whimpered
The bed underneath you groaned when you sank your body, completely subdued in pleasure. Your fingers clenching on his fingers, the other had found the soft strands of his black hair, pulling softly when he started flicking your swollen clit with the tip of his tongue.
"F-fuck—Joshua," you breathed, screwing your eyes shut, trying to remain still on your bed but couldn't help but writhe slightly when he switched from flicking your clit to sucking at it lightly.
You propped yourself with your elbows on your bed to see him practically making out with your cunt. The sight of it alone made you almost climax—his dark hair between your fingers, his hands holding you still for him as he lifted his eyes to find yours.
A moan coiled in your throat, your fingers tugged his hair as you felt your orgasm drawing near, and he seemed to know it from the sounds you were making, so he started sucking your swollen bud harder, moving his head up and down slightly.
"Joshua, 'm close," you breathed, your body trembling slightly. "Fuck! Don't stop, please. Joshua!"
You threw your head back, your jaw going slack too as raggedy breaths broke in your chest, twitching and groaning lewdly on your bed. You moaned loudly, your hand pressing on his head as your orgasm continued to wash over you, the waves of pure bliss left tingles on your limbs and face.
You eased your body back on your bed, your chest heaving embarrassingly hard, soft moans spilled from your lips when Joshua's mouth left your throbbing cunt after showering it with tender kisses.
"Feel good?" you heard him ask.
You opened your eyes to find him still between your thighs, smiling fondly at you.
"Amazing," you sighed weakly. "I love how you eat me out so much."
He laughed. "I love eating you out, princess."
"Oh, yeah?" you breathed.
Joshua climbed back on top of you. The dim light from your lamp let you see the pretty features of his face, you reached to wipe your arousal from his chin and he smiled as he pressed his chapped lips with your own.
"Yeah," he answered and you were reminded of how much you liked it when he said that.
He got on his knees to take his sweet time taking your stockings off, his hands caressing your legs in the process, his lust-lidded eyes locking with yours as he did so. 
Then he lied on his side, using his elbow on the bed to support him as his other hand slid between your legs, his pointer finger slid between your pussy lips, playing with your wetness as his eyes searched your face.
Your eyes shifted to the finger disappearing inside your cunt, pumping in and out a few times until you were ready for another finger.
"Joshua," you whimpered pathetically when his two fingers massaged your walls, but really what had you on the verge of insanity was his doe eyes trained on your face.
"Mm?" his eyebrows arched slightly. "What's wrong?"
"I want you so bad," you breathed, your hand cupping his cheek to pull him into a needy kiss, nibbling his lower lip with your teeth when his fingers scissored inside you.
"You think you're ready for me, sweetheart?" he muttered, his voice strained with tension.
You nodded a bit too eagerly.
"No, I don't think you're ready, baby," he replied, introducing a third finger inside you.
"Joshua," you whined, knowing that he liked hearing you beg. "Please. I waited all day. Please take me,"
He smiled, immediately telling on your little game. "Yeah, you waited all day for me princess, after ignoring me all week. Why should I give you what you want?"
"Because you want it too," you replied boldly. "I know you want me as much as I want you."
"Mmm, yeah baby, you're right. I want you but I wait for you," his doe eyes locked with yours. "Can you say you do the same for me, baby? You like having fun by pushing me away, so why shouldn't I have fun too?"
"You're being mean, Shua," you frowned. "I didn't push you away, just–"
"Careful, princess," he warned, the corner of his lips twitching. "I don't like when you lie to me. You know that."
You moaned then he pressed the palm of his hand on your sensitive clit while still pumping three fingers in and out of your wet walls.
When you gave him no response nor explanation, he smiled. "So you were pushing me away. Again, baby?"
You remained quiet and looked away from his darkened gaze.
"Why do you do that?" he pressed, his voice sounding soft, alluring.
You groaned and bit your lip as he continued to massage your walls with his fingers, his palm stimulating your clit slowly toward another orgasm.
"Joshua," you sighed, closing your eyes. "Joshua, I'm cumming."
"No, you're not," he muttered softly, pulling his fingers out of your cunt when your walls had started clenching harder.
You gasped in frustration. "Joshua!" you whined. "I was close."
He let out a breathy chuckle and pressed his lips against your cheek. "I know, baby."
"Then why..? Why did you stop?" you asked.
"You're cumming when I want you to," he replied shortly.
You sighed your frustration, not caring how childish you were being. "You're mean," you pouted.
He laughed softly when your fingers hooked on the band of his underwear and yanked it down, his hard cock slapping his lower abdomen as he lifted his hips for you to tear off the last piece of clothing he wore.  
"And you lied to me, again," he countered as he climbed back on top of your body, pressing loving kisses to your cheeks and chin, each kiss seemed to leave a trail of tingles on your skin.
"I'm s–"
"Sorry?" he muttered, kissing your jaw.
"Joshua, please," you moaned weakly. "I'll be good, just—fuck me. Do whatever you want. Punish me but please, fuck me."
His eyes glinted with awe, and you remembered that he liked it when you begged. "You'll let me do anything I want, sweetheart?"
"Yes," you breathed. "I'm yours."
Joshua cocked his head to the side ever so slightly. "Say that again," he whispered, giving you another soft kiss now on your lips. And another.
"I'm yours, Joshua."
He hummed in satisfaction. "You're mine," he repeated, savoring the statement with his sweet lips.
"Only yours," you echoed dazedly.
"Oh, you cruel thing," he said darkly. "You know what you're doing, don't you?"
No response came from you. If he wanted answers, that was the best you could give him right now. And for a moment, he appeared to know that too.
A shudder invaded your body when Joshua grabbed his cock on one hand, dragging his cockhead on your wet folds. A soft breath spilled from his lips when he felt you, skin on skin.
"Ready?" Joshua searched your eyes again.
You nodded. "Ready," you breathed.
A low whimper coiled in your throat when he slowly eased himself in. Your hand held onto his shoulder, your eyes brimmed with tears from the pain of how big he actually felt without the extra lubrication that the condoms provided.
But you also moaned at how insanely good he felt raw. It was so good to finally feel him, every naked inch of him inside your walls, that you swore you would climax from just having him like this. 
"Breathe, baby," he whispered, kissing your moans with such tenderness that you almost broke.
"Joshua," you whimpered, your fingers digging on his shoulder.
"It's okay. I know, baby," he frowned slightly. "Do you want to stop?"
"No, no. I'm fine. Please," you begged, although you didn't know what you were begging for.
He released another breath when he finally bottomed out, your walls throbbed desperately around his length and he pressed his forehead against yours.
His eyelids fluttered closed before pulling his hips back, the feeling of his cock sliding out your wet walls felt good—so good that you were already whimpering and trembling.
"Okay?" he gasped, starting to push in and out of you.
"Yes, more than okay, Joshua," you stuttered, closing your eyes with a sigh.
"You're crying, baby," he pointed, he was still moving achingly slow.
"It-it's big—you're so big," you stammered pathetically.
He paused. "Am I hurting you?" his voice was laced with concern.
"No, it's not bad, Joshua. I can take it," you breathed.
It actually wasn't that bad—as he pushed his cock in and out you could feel your walls easing and stretching around it, adjusting to his size.
Joshua looked tense, he let out a groan when his hips started moving faster on you, then he pulled his body back, making you cry out in pleasure when the position of his cock inside you shifted, pressing on your front walls.
He brought a hand on your lower abdomen, his thumb finding your clit to start rubbing on it.
"Better?" he asked. He was still weary, his big eyes searching your face as he pushed his cock in and out on you, rubbing your clit to ease you from the lingering threads of pain.
"Yeah. Feels so good, Joshua," you sighed, swallowing thickly at the drag of his cock inside your walls. "So, so good."
"Yeah, I know," he replied with a low groan. "You feel good too, sweetheart. Fuck, so good."
You whimpered at the sound of his words, the way he pronounced each one with a tight jaw, his brow furrowing as he pushed his cock inside your walls at a delicious pace.
"So warm and wet, so fucking good, baby," he sighed.
His thumb pressed on your clit, rubbing it and teasing it senselessly, making you moan and squirm. It was too much, your hands clenched on your bed covers when you sensed your orgasm drawing near again.
"Oh, god. Fuck," you whimpered, writhing against your bed as Joshua dragged his cock in and out your clenching walls.
"Fuck," he groaned, his hips buckled for a second. "You're close. Right, bunny?"
You shook your head on your pillows.
Then, his fingers landed a slap right on your clit, making you yelp loudly. Clearly telling on your weak lie.
"Yes! Yes, I'm close, Joshua," you cried out.
He smirked in response, his hands holding your hips a second before he started ramming his cock faster inside your cunt. Your eyes widened at him and bit your lip hard enough to draw blood.
"Fuck," he muttered again before pulling out of you, right as your walls started clenching deliciously near your release.
"Joshua!" you whined, breathing furiously at him.
"Remember what I said," he was breathing hard too, probably because he was resisting his own pleasure only to edge you.
He carefully lowered his hard and wet cock on top of your tummy, you stifled a moan at the sheer size of it and the weight of it too. The reddened tip, the soft marks of a vein along the wet shaft, you bit your lip.
"Shua, please," you pleaded with a desperate sigh.
"That's not my name, baby," he snapped with a dark look.
"Joshua, I'll be good, just-"
"Tell me why I should believe you," he muttered as he moved to slide within your walls again, your heart swelled with a little satisfaction when he groaned in pleasure too. 
"I'll show you," you said weakly.
"Not good enough, princess," he shook his head as he slapped your pussy again, right in your sensitive clit.
"God, fuck!" you yelped loudly. "I'm sorry, Joshua. I'm sorry for pushing you away."
You moaned helplessly when leaned down a bit and spit on your cunt, covering your clit with his saliva to start rubbing circles on your swollen and oversensitive bud.
"Why, do you like to have me at your beck and call? You enjoy to fuck me and toss me away like one of your toys?" he muttered darkly.
Suddenly you regretted telling him to punish you, because he only wanted the truth from you, unlike last time he punished you and you had to try not utter a word while he fucked you into the bed.
But you could see that he was struggling to hold back, swallowing hard, his brow furrowed.
"No! You're not my toy—you're... you're," you stammered. Were you about to confess? Like this?
Your orgasm was threatening close, so you squirmed on your bed, trying to create some distance from his fingers teasing your clit. Joshua understood what you were attempting to do and started caressing it lightly, thinking that he was over stimming you.
"You're close?" he asked, realizing when he heard you sigh a moan.
But he didn't wait for your answer. Joshua pulled out again, his cock landing with a soft slap on your lower tummy. A single drop of cum dripped from his tip, but he wasn't cumming yet, you knew that by the way he was breathing in deeply, trying to contain himself.
If he only wanted the truth, you were deep in trouble. Because you push him away to avoid your growing infatuation over him.
"Joshua?" you called abruptly.
"Mm?" he lifted his gaze to find yours.
"What's your favorite color?" you asked breathlessly.
"What, why?" he frowned.
"Tell me," you pressed.
"Pink," he responded, his brow not relaxing.
"Really? That's cute," you sighed, Joshua's hips retracted from your body and he positioned himself again on his knees, his cock aligned with your core.
"Yours?" he asked with an air of reluctance.
You told him your favorite color.
"Why did I know you'd say that," he replied with a small smile.
"Your birthday?" you asked, feeling utterly pathetic.
He chuckled breathily. "What, why're you asking me this right now?"
"Tell me," you insisted. "Please."
"December 30th," he responded, looking confused.
A loud moan reverberated across your room, so loud that you almost wanted to cover your mouth when his cock sank into your walls again. He thrusted slowly, but then he continued rubbing your clit with his two middle fingers.
"What's yours, princess?" he asked, appearing to be following whatever you were trying to do. 
You told him your birthday through broken gasps.
"Still, I don't get why you ask," he breathed tiredly.
"I want to get to know you better," you told him with a whine.
Joshua smiled sweetly at you and that might've done it for you.
Your walls clenched around him and he groaned loudly, slamming his hips against you, the sound of his skin slapping against you filled the silence that followed between you.
Something you weren't expecting happened:  Joshua seemed to have forgotten about edging you, closing his eyelids tightly, his mouth parting a little. You loved to see when his face scrunched up like that, when he was so close that the muscles around his mouth relaxed, but his frown would deepen sweetly. 
Joshua threw his head back a little, a moan muffled in his mouth, his throat bobbing a little as he seemed to be immersed in pure pleasure. He didn't relent his hard thrusts on you, pushing his cock in and out your sopping walls while rubbing your clit expertly.
"Fuck, I can't—Joshua," you gasped. "I'm close. Please, please. Let me cum?"
Joshua groaned before lowering his gaze back at you. "Where do you want me, baby?"
It took you two seconds to understand what he was implying.
"Inside," you breathed. "Please. Cum inside me."
He nodded before he started ramming his cock in your walls faster, moaning loudly through clenched teeth. You moaned with him and sank your head into your pillows, back arching as the tension in your body only grew more intense.
"Joshua, oh god—Joshua," you called, not knowing what else to say, feeling all sanity slipping out of your mind, coming undone under waves of pure bliss washing over you.
"Baby," he called to you. "Say it again."
You blinked weakly, his words bringing you back to reality.  
"I'm yours, Joshua," you breathed.
"You're mine," he replied with a raw tone. "I'm gonna make you mine, right baby? You want that? Want me to stuff your pretty pussy full of my cum?"
You moaned and nodded desperately, your walls squeezing him hard the moment you heard his words.
"Yes, oh god, yes please," you whimpered.
He cussed and moaned as he came inside you, pushing his hips against you sloppily.
"You're mine," he whispered, his eyes glazing over the sight of you cumming hard with him.
"Only yours, Joshua," you responded wildly.
He groaned, your name spilling from his plump lips, pushing his cum deep inside you with lazy thrusts and came to a stop with heavy breaths.
His head thrown back slightly, his eyelids fluttering shut, his mouth parted. He looked so unreal, ethereal even.
Oh god. What have you done?  
Joshua seemed to come down from his high when you shifted on your bed ever so slightly.
"What was all that?" he demanded in a tone that still denoted his confusion still. "The questions."
"I know nothing about you, Joshua," you explained shyly.
And yet, you told him you were his.
But he blinked slowly and started laughing, his cock was still buried inside your walls.
"Don't laugh at me," you pouted through your hurt ego, though he had no idea why you started quizzing him mid-coitus.
"You couldn't wait till we were done?" he asked and giggled again when you shook your head.
He leaned forward, placing his arms above your head on your pillows and pressed his chest against yours, his eyes looking at you fondly.
"What other questions do you have for me?" he asked.
"I-I have plenty," you admitted meekly.
"Is there a reason why you want to know now? Or can it wait?" he kept his eyes trained on you, you noticed, he was gathering every reaction you showed.
"It can wait," you nodded. "Why?"
"Because you asked me to fuck you all night and I'm in the middle of that," he booped your nose with one finger. "Can you keep your questions until I'm done?"
A sweet smile crept on his face when your core fluttered around him and you groaned in utter embarrassment.
"Is that a yes?" he laughed.
You groaned again and slapped his shoulder slightly.
"I'll get something to clean you up," he muttered with a smile still, pulling his hips from you.
He returned some minutes later with a hand towel, which he had soaked with warm water and he gently cleaned the cum that had already spilled from your entrance.
"I found it in the cupboard. I hope you don't mind," he darted a look at you briefly.
"It's fine," you assured him. "I need to go to the bathroom to take care of everything else."
"Do you want me to carry you there?" he asked, getting up from the bed.
"I'm fine," you sat up on your bed. "Can we shower later?" you asked meekly.
"Sure, baby," he sighed softly.
When you came back to your bedroom, you had half-expected to see him asleep from how tired he actually looked. But he was lying on your bed, one leg crossed over and absentmindedly looking at his phone screen, one arm tucked under his head.
God, he was a sight to see. Chest and throat covered in hickeys, his black hair ruffled slightly, the bedroom eyes when he noticed you walking in.
You climbed your bed and lied on your side next to him.
"You're okay?" he asked after he left his phone on the nightstand and turned on his side to look at you.
"Yeah," you sighed. "Never better."
His fingers cupped your chin softly and you leaned to lock his lips with your own in a tender, hot kiss. Joshua moaned softly in your mouth when you felt his tongue slid in your mouth to mingle with yours.
You gathered in your mind what little and fruitless information you got from your long day with Joshua. Maybe you got it wrong this whole time, and you don't need to know what his favorite color is, although you did want to learn his birthday.
You could no longer hide your infatuation over Joshua Hong. It was becoming painfully obvious, though you weren't sure to what extent he was aware of this. Or if he even cared, for that matter.
There was one more painful realization to all of this, one that you didn't expect and probably overlooked because you were worried so much about your infatuation with him that you didn't care to see him with clarity.
Joshua was lonely.
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✮ a/n: i'm sorry
i have nothing else to say.
not really, haha
i love joshua, i loved writing this
if you liked this chapter please show it some love? ����
and happy holidays!! ヾ(•w•`)o
READ PART 5
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