#he's going to lose either way right?

[llamagoddessofficial]

How do the boyos react to a breakup? :3c

Not... great.

I've answered this before, but it doesn't hurt to do it again, does it?

Sans: There's a split second, after she breaks the news, where he stares at her with no expression on his face. It looks lost, perhaps... blank? Totally unreadable. But to someone who knows him very well, like Papyrus, Sans just did his version of breaking down in hysterical tears and begging her not to leave him.

... Just like that, he defaults to what he always does when faced with a deep emotional wound- the mask comes back up. He doesn't even try to resist the breakup. He perfectly plays the part of the understanding, emotionally mature ex, he agrees that they 'just aren't compatible that way'. He doesn't ask how he can change, he doesn't try to come up with ways to make things work. He just rolls over. Of course he's happy to stay close friends. Of course she's still welcome at their place. Of course she should still come over for spaghetti and videogames on Friday evening. Anything to get her out the door as soon as possible.

He seems completely unaffected. They continue being friends... but part of him is now permanently closed off to her. He never gives casual touch, he doesn't text her jokes that made him think of her. Their texts become a repeating pattern of her longer messages, his simple 'ok 👍' replies, then the little grey timestamp of several days passing. Outside of the usual Friday, he never asks to come over, he never invites her anywhere. Even if she can't read him, she'll definitely see how massively their dynamic has shifted- she'll realise just how important she used to be to him.

... And suddenly... she gets the sting of realisation that she'll never see that side of him again.

Red: It depends on how far they are into the relationship. If it's early, he does what Sans pretends to do- he cuts off the romance but remains completely chill with her. Her breaking up with him is the sign his hyper-vulnerable subconscious was looking for to pull his budding feelings for her right out by the roots; now he has the concrete proof he needed that he shouldn't invest his Soul into this. He remains an easygoing, casual friend who's eager to be one with benefits.

If it's later in the relationship... after a long time with one another... if flat out denial that she wants to break up doesn't work, he tries bargaining. He tries promising he'll change, promising everything under the sun in the hopes that she'll stay. He tries begging her not to go. His last-ditch is trying to explain that he loves her, and he doesn't know if he can love anyone else. He can't be alone after he thought he'd never be alone again.

... If all else fails, he pivots to his old friend anger. He thought they were going to be together forever, buy a house, have kids. He genuinely can't handle watching that all slip away from him. He feels like it's all his fault, he fumbled the love of his life; so now she never loved him, now she's a liar, now she's been planning this for months and dragging him along out of pity. Now she's probably cheating- anything he can get his hands on to make it make sense. Nothing can calm him down, not even her, he storms out and gets into vicious fights and spitefully watches the missed texts and calls rack up. He immediately falls back into old addictions- when Papyrus finds him two days later, the stench of whiskey is almost too much.

If we're looking for a silver lining here, it at least brings the brothers closer. Papyrus misses his sister, but he firmly takes Red's side (as he's done his whole life) and wants nothing to do with her anymore. It hurts to watch Red unravel again.

Skull: Skull's concept of a 'relationship' is slightly skewed. He doesn't really understand it, he never has... his mind doesn't work like that, and neither does his idea of love. If he loves her, he loves her, that's all there is to it. Because of that, ironically, there's a chance that Skull would take the breakup the best out of all of them, because to him love is just as sweet regardless of whether they can or can't kiss. He really doesn't care what label is on what they have- if he can still see her, still cuddle her and touch her hair, he doesn't mind. Romantic, platonic, sure, whatever sweetheart says. If she doesn't want to be romantic anymore that's fine. So long as she'll still hold his hand. So long as he can still turn to her when the nightmares are too loud; so long as he can still watch the corners of her eyes crinkle when she smiles.

... There won't, however, be any new lovers.

The thing about Skull is being with him comes with the unspoken agreement that there'll never be anyone else. He's completely attached to her; and now that the affection as gone as deep as it has, no matter what Mc says or how much they talk about it, the sight of anyone else being with her fills him with so much instinctive rage and hatred it just isn't safe. There will be blood.

She can break up with him, sure. That's fine. Whatever sweetheart wants.

But nobody will ever take his place.

[starry-bi-sky]

mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.

now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.

He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.

(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)

The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.

The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.

And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.

(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)

The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.

anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)

[thekittyokat]

you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah

[divorcedwife]

i made cole more spirit this time and it makes me so sad, the way people forget him :( but i also feel guilty if i make him more human, so at least i can’t win. yippee!!

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Understandably So no one mentions charles when talking about the Logan movie and again Understandably So This Aint Bout Him however i do confess that as someone who had never seen Logan until like. a month ago when i was binging all the movies and without knowing a single thing about it aside from laura i cant lie i was in fact jumpscared by him being there. especially for at least like 3/4s of the movie

[astranauticus]

stultifera navis rerun AKA thinking about Iberia hours again because a lot of the Iberians have such fascinating relationships with the concept of home but specifically Thorns and Lumen are eating at my brain. like where do you call home when the place that is your home Just Fucking Hates You? Elysium's rewinding breeze specifically makes a point to hammers home how differently Iberia treats its Liberi and its Aegir

(which is especially interesting since this comes right after a conversation where Purestream commented on how despite Leizi being a high ranking government official, there are still some experiences that are universal for all Yanese people - because the experience of what Iberia itself is like isnt universal for all Iberians)

But all that being said, Thorns also straight up states that Aegir is not his home, and yeah, how could it be? How could a place you've never been to, never truly known, ever be your home? How could it ever feel like a home?

so where do you go when the place that you are from hates your people and the place your people are from is completely unfamiliar and alien to you? Thorns' answer at the end of the conversation with Aya is: my home is where i chose it to be. my home is where there are people I care about and people who care about me

in the complete opposite direction, Lumen's oprec asks: why do you still stay in a place that wants you gone? because the people of Gran Faro like Jordi well enough but when push comes to shove, they will want the only Aegir in town gone

and yet, when Rald the messenger offers him a chance to leave Jordi turns him down and when he's forced to escape Gran Faro after the people there literally try to send him to his death (or worse) at the hands of the Inquisitors he keeps trying to go back because like everyone in stultifera navis, Jordi is clinging to his own dreams of a golden age

but the shape of that dream is unique to every character and for Jordi, his dreams are deeply, inseparably bound to the Eye of Iberia, the legacy his parents left behind

and it's this dream of becoming someone great, of bringing about that golden age that his parents devoted their lives to help create that ties Jordi to this nothing town because despite everything, despite the mistrust of the townsfolk and the hostility of the Inquisition and the danger from the ocean, he simply cannot leave it behind

(or, because i personally dislike the official translation,)

"I just see this place as my home"

so yeah. not sure what overall point i was trying to make here i'm just. deeply in love with these stories about chosing what is and isn't your home, of saying you will not call a place your home because it has given you no reason to or saying you consider a place your home even though it has given you every reason not to. deeply unwell about them <3

[thegameartist03]

watched a playthrough of Still Wakes the Deep (PHENOMENAL game) and i am disappointed that Caz did not have that taffy in him. everything seemed like it was perfectly set up for him to have that taffy in him (being presumed dead after rescue, knowing where the taffy stuff was around him, surviving as long as he did, not getting horribly injured, hearing things from the Big Taffy) but i completely understand why that wasn't the twist the game developers went for.

however, in order to cope i am now imagining a version of the game where Caz got Ethan Winters'd by the taffy after he fell in the water. this would affect the gameplay at multiple points and add new mechanics as well as incorporate the original ones, and certainly provide some conflict for a man who just wants to get home to his wife and daughters and keep his friends safe.

bonus! being taffy'd would give the player the option to save people who originally died by sacrificing Caz's humanity bit by bit and embracing the taffy more to overcome obstacles. you could even communicate with the already fully taffy'd guys and get them to calm down or move or target specifically you instead of other people.

just a concept, i probably won't do much with it. but i do have a very distinct image of Caz having a shiny oilslick sheen to his eyes like the Big Taffy after he's pulled out of the water.

[mc-critical]

1.10 / 1.09

[thatrandomlemononyourcounter1]

taking a break from media atm

[orcelito]

Ok I Am enjoying getting to see Neji's teammates react to this. Especially Lee, who's fuckin wrecked by this. Wish we got more reaction from Tenten, but by this point I can't be surprised at Kishimoto not giving proper depth to the girls.

This part tho,

LEE... YOUR HAND... YOUR HAND TOOK HIS EYEBROWS AWAY... GIVE THEM BACK..!!!!!!!

[lycankeyy]

Good morning last night I was trying to think abt rgbfverse stuff to help me sleep and I shit you not Darnell Imagery fucking bled into it so hard that it just became about him. The Specific Character autism is going prompt critical

[seventh-district]

not even gonna tag this properly bc i don't wanna get Involved but i do have some Thoughts i need to get out into the void so here we go

(aaa quick edit: CW for mention/discussion of Boothill leaks)

[zeb-z]

the sooner badboyhalo viewers realize he’s an unreliable narrator the sooner I’ll be able to sleep at night

[nebula-nonhuman]

Hey guys what does it mean when you relate to a sexuality but also feel immensely distressed by it and don't want to be the sexuality at all haha asking for a friend

[leori-the-unlearned]

the way digimon does conflict/drama between two characters who should be or are close: chef’s kiss <3

the way sonic idw handles creating conflict/drama between two characters who should be or are close: *wilting flower*

[biillys]

yo merry christmas i'm thinking about christmas at the hargrove-mayfield's house throughout the years

wanna think about their first christmas together as a family, maybe before neil and susan even got married, or maybe just after. wanna think about what susan got billy for that first december 25th that they knew each other and what neil bought for max. did neil just pass that duty off to susan and stick his name on the from: section of the gift tag or did he put effort in and actually go to the shops and try and find something, specifically for his new step-daughter.

wanna think about the following few christmas' in california where billy never heard from his mom, never even got a fucking christmas card, but max heard from her dad; spending the time between christmas breakfast and christmas lunch on the phone, thanking him for the present he sent in the mail. wanna think about susan listening in, hearing her ex sounding distant and barely focused, agreeing with everything their daughter says, and biting her tongue; half relieved max hasn't picked up on the fact that sam's handwriting and her own is exactly the same, and half mad that sam's willing to take the credit without even blinking.

wanna think about their last christmas in california where they don't even realise it's their last one there; billy hitting his stride in being the worlds moodiest and most hard done by teenager, max following quick in his footsteps. wanna think about how all the gifts hand-picked by susan would be too lame and embarrassing to be thankful for, both kids screwing their nose up at most presents. maybe billy and max exchanging small gifts that christmas becos they haven't been at each others throats all year, only some, and susan thought it would be nice.

wanna think about their first christmas in hawkins, with things still so messy and uncomfortable and rough, but somehow settling into it like it's their new normal. wanna think about it being cold as fuck, none of them prepared for hawkins winters, and everyone walking on eggshells around each other and pretending it's fine. wanna think about max growing up and officially moving into her teenage years and billy counting down the days until he leaves them, adulthood so close yet still so fucking far. wanna think about them all sitting down for christmas dinner and billy barely being acknowledged, things still so tense even though it's been almost two months since everything went to shit, and max forcing out answers every time susan tries to keep the conversation flowing, her doing her best to carry the christmas spirit.

wanna think about a world where there's no living nightmares, no government conspiracies, and no death, but billy still spirals out of control anyway, feeling trapped and cornered in an unfamiliar town with unfamiliar people, his only solution to lash out and fight, anger and violence and distrust being all he knows. wanna think about max coming to the realisation that there's bigger monsters than her asshole step-brother, that maybe billy isn't the start of everyone's problems, just always somehow the end of them. want her to trace the line back to the source and realise neither of them ever stood a fucking chance.

wanna think about a christmas where billy's eighteen and max is fifteen, and they still live on cherry lane, and neil still fucking sucks, and susan still fucking tries, and everything's still awkward, the four of them never quite becoming the family unit their parents try to pretend them to be, but maybe billy and max get along these days, in a way they never could when they were younger, them going from being against each other to realising it's team up or be picked apart.

max gives him a present she saved up for for months, maybe as they're all going to bed, and billy raises an eyebrow at her before sighing and unwrapping it, still too fucking stubborn to be able to say thank you, but somehow brave enough to reach a hand into his room and grab out a present he got for her, and it's unwrapped cos he hasn't wrapped a present since his mom left, so max does her little sister duty and tells him she loves the wrapping and effort he put into it, before actually looking at what he got her, and he walks into his room and closes the door before she can even acknowledge it for the gift it is.

wanna think about billy eventually moving out, but not making it far; too fucking broke to live out his dreams of going home. wanna think about neil clapping him on the back on moving day and telling him he's done good, that this is what growing up is. graduating school, getting a job, moving out, providing for yourself. that's what makes a man. that it was rough there for a while, and he was worried, but he's glad to see his son's shaped up and straightened out finally, thanks to his solid parenting. wanna think about billy having no idea how to react, thinking that's the closest he'll ever get to his dad saying he's proud of him. wanna think about max helping him move and helping him chose a couch, claiming it has to be comfortable enough to sleep on when she crashes there on school breaks. want billy to tell her to get fucked, but buy the couch she picked out anyway.

wanna think about his first christmas out of home, and how how he probably feels indifferent about it at best, and pain about it at worst. christmas was never like the movies growing up, no matter how much susan tried, so it's not like being alone and having no decorations or presents is going to hurt, but he has enough memories of his mum, and a few moments over the years from when max and susan tried, and there's such a build up and fucking atmosphere about it all in hawkins that he can't escape it even if he tried, and he's starting to realise maybe he's really fucking lonely.

wanna think about neil calling him up and billy answering, cos now that they don't live in the same house and billy's finally taking responsibility for his own life, neil's like a whole new person. he wants to do father-son shit like talk about cars, offer advice about fixing the kitchen sink, tell him when to hire someone to fix something and when you should be able to fix something yourself, wants to watch sports games and crack open a beer on a saturday afternoon, and billy makes up reasons to say no most of the time, but sometimes he caves and says yes, cos there's a small part of him that's always wanted this. wanna think about neil calling and asking billy when he's coming over for christmas, saying that susan's cooking his favourite. wanna think about billy not even knowing what his favourite is, but saying he'll be at breakfast by 7:30am before he can stop himself.

wanna think about billy staying 'til afternoon and max raising an eyebrow at him, muttering don't you have a home to go to? while they clean up after lunch, but then neil offers him a beer, so he ignores her, and listens when his dad says he's welcome to stay for dinner, too. wanna think about billy and max smoking a joint out the back while their parents end the day with a christmas movie, and max turns to him and asks him what neil's deal is these days, and billy shrugs her off, too stubborn to look at it all too closely.

wanna think about billy pulling some money out of his wallet cos he has some now, and he didn't have time to get a present, too busy working overtime, but he has cash, so that'll do. wanna think about max handing him a new zippo, then somehow unearthing a whole-ass wrapped present, and when he opens it, it's a set of cheap fake glass cups, becos billy doesn't have any yet and every time she comes over she has to drink something either directly from the bottle in the fridge or remember her own drink bottle, and it's a housewarming gift, asshole, and this isn't my house, billy thinks, this isn't my fucking home, but it's also all he's got, so he finds a place for them in the cupboard above the sink, and max hunts them down the next time she's over first thing.

wanna think about christmas' in their future, when max moves out, when they're in their 20's and 30's, maybe billy keeps coming home, finding an uneasy peace with his dad reserved for special occasions only, the only few times of the year he's willing to lie to himself and pretend things were never as bad as his memories made them out to be, or maybe everything eventually crumbles, and billy finally gets to put some real distance between them, and finally then, he can breathe and stop pretending.

maybe max continues going, her seeing her mom try and so she puts in the effort to try as well, and maybe that works for a while, maybe even a lifetime, but maybe it doesn't, and by the time both her and billy are closer to 30 than 20, the only family they see on christmas is each other, and billy never wraps her presents, and max only gets him practical things, and they drink and bitch most of the time, but it's so much easier to exist in each others space when they don't have to act and pretend and play parts.