#he’s a little confused but he’s got the spirit!

[thef1diary]

Thinking about ghost!max teasing and edging tf out of reader (im talking vibrators, fingers, his mouth… the whole 9 yards) while she tries to get ready for a NYE party… he has her panting and crying for a release he will ONLY give her if she stays home… essentially he wants reader to ring in the new years with his cock burried deep in her pussy.

Anyways whore house hours while at work 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

-❄️

— hi nonnie!! So glad to see you back in my inbox <3 whore house is open 24/7 🤭 this is sooo ghost!max, but how dare you even think of leaving him alone on nye of all days? 18+ content below

The short black dress clung to your body like a second skin, paired with shimmering gold heels that sparkled in the soft glow of your vanity lights. New Year’s Eve promised glamour, champagne, and laughter. You were almost ready—almost—if only Max wasn’t tormenting you.

The vibrator tucked into your panties buzzed mercilessly against your clit, its rhythm relentless yet carefully orchestrated to pull you back from the edge every time you got too close. A familiar cool draft curled around you, despite the lack of an open window, sending a chill down your spine.

“Max,” you hissed, gripping the vanity’s edge as your reflection blurred in the soft glow. “Stop playing games.”

Nearby, the spirit box on your dresser crackled to life, faint static filling the room before his voice filtered through. “Stop playing games?” The box repeated his words in fragmented bursts, mocking your plea as his shadowy presence sharpened behind you in the mirror. “Why would I stop when you’re this perfect? A trembling, desperate little mess for me.”

You could barely see him—just a faint, smoky outline, more suggestion than substance. Yet his touch was undeniable as cold fingers trailed down your spine, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

Two fingers slid in your pussy, curling against that sensitive spot inside. You gasped, your knees buckling as his invisible hand held you steady, keeping you pressed against the vanity.

Your constant moans filled the room as he pumped his fingers inside you, his presence looming, the faint scent of gasoline and something slightly woodsy wrapping around you like a cocoon.

“You’re not leaving tonight,” he murmured through the spirit box, the sound enough to make you shiver. “Not when you should be here, screaming my name into the new year.”

Your hips instinctively rocked against his fingers, only amplifying the torment of the vibrator on your clit causing slick arousal to pool in your panties. You were teetering on the brink, your pussy clenching desperately around his fingers, your moans growing louder as release hovered just within reach.

But just as you were about to reach your orgasm, his fingers stilled, his voice from the spirit box cutting through the haze. “Not yet.”

You whimpered, thighs trembling, and as he slid your panties down your legs, the buzz of the vibrator moved away with an almost mocking finality. “Max,” you groaned, but he only chuckled, the sound resonating around the room like a ripple of cold air.

Before you could protest further, he dropped to his knees, his outline barely visible in the faint glow of the vanity light. His mouth latched onto your clit, his tongue cold but relentless as it worked you over. The spirit box crackled again, his voice threading through the air in between the sounds of your desperate moans.

“Stay home,” he whispered, interspersed with static. “Let me fuck you.”

His hands—more firm and defined than his ghostly form—gripped your thighs, holding you steady as his tongue licked and sucked in a rhythm that had you sobbing. Your fingers scrambled on the vanity, searching for a way to ground yourself, your nails scraping against the polished surface as your knees threatened to give out.

“Say it,” he growled against your folds. The vibration of his voice hit your pussy yet the sound came from the spirit box, sending jolts of pleasure and slight confusion straight through you. “Say you’ll stay.”

“I—I can’t,” you stammered, your resolve crumbling with every flick of his tongue.

He pulled away just long enough to speak, and you could make out an outline of his form looking up at you from between your legs. “Then you’ll be starting the new year with a punishment. You don’t want that do you, schatje?”

When his mouth descended on your cunt again, it was too much. You broke, sobbing out your surrender. “Fine! I’ll stay! Please, Max, I’ll stay!”

A satisfied moan echoed through the spirit box, and his shadowy form rose behind you, pressing you against the vanity as he guided you to bend over. You barely had time to brace yourself before he pushed into you, stretching you to the hilt in one slow, deliberate thrust.

Soon, it was nearing midnight, and he had you exactly where he wanted—pliant, desperate, and utterly ruined. The once-neat dress you’d planned to wear to the party was crumpled somewhere on the floor, forgotten hours ago when he’d pushed you down onto the bed.

Your loud, almost pornographic moans blended with the rhythmic sounds of skin meeting skin, the slick slide of his cock driving into you while he had finally let you to cum over and over again.

“You’re perfect,” he groaned, his faint outline shifting above you as he kissed down your neck. “So fucking perfect when you’re like this. All mine.”

You whimpered as he thrust into you harder, deeper, his cock hitting that devastating spot that made stars burst behind your eyes. The spirit box in the corner crackled again, faint words lost in static, a hauntingly intimate sound that only heightened your arousal.

When the chime of midnight echoed through the room, paired with fireworks happening outside your house, Max gripped your hips tightly, his thrusts quickening. “Cum for me,” he commanded, his voice a growl of pure possession. “Now, schat. Scream my name.”

Your body obeyed, the orgasm ripping through you with high intensity. You screamed his name, your voice hoarse and raw as he continued to move inside you, drawing out every wave of pleasure.

As the last aftershocks left you trembling, Max leaned down, his lips brushing your ear in a ghostly kiss.

“Happy new year,” he murmured, his voice thick with satisfaction. His presence lingered, a cold yet comforting press against your skin as you lay there, completely undone.

This year, you thought hazily, you wouldn’t need a resolution. You already had everything you wanted right here.

want more ghost!max? send me an ask with your filthiest thoughts and it’ll get answered during one of my dirty drabble days

[bbystark]

♡ ghost figures it out ♡

simon riley (ghost) x reader

♡ masterlist ♡ request more! ♡ donate :)

summary: ghost tells soap he's in love, then he goes home to you with big plans

⚠︎ suggestive themes mdni

a/n: can you guys tell that all i want is to be wifed up by a large man? ;( it is short, but enjoy!

"Soap." His voice cuts through the air abruptly. No response from said man, sucked into his shitty tv dinner and whatever was flickering on the tv. He tries again, voice laced with subtle exasperation. "Johnny."

Soap pauses for a split second, before stuffing his mouth with another bite, not sparing him a glance. "Wut?"

"Think I love 'er."

Soap doesn't think he hears him right. "Wut?" He repeats, staring at his LT dumbly.

"Said I'm in love."

"Fuckin' 'ell, little y/n? You finally fuckin' catchin' on?" Soap slaps his knee, chortling to himself like this was a comedy show. "She finally say somethin'? Cause I know you're brooding arse didn't."

"Fuck are you on about?"

"S' no secret Lt, lass walks around with 'er homecooked meals 'n doe eyes starin' after you. None of us ever thought that woman was just a fuck fer you, was just waitin' for one of you to quit bein' daft."

Simon almost feels himself flush at the overt admission that everyone around him could clearly see what he hadn't until recently. When he had first seen you at the the pub near the recent base the 141 had been assigned to, he told himself it would be a one time thing. Then it was twice, three times, then bringing you along to nights out with his team, because hey, you get along so well, why not? Come 'round the base just to say hey and drop off "leftovers" while you're at it. That's casual.

How true it is that hindsight is 20/20. When Simon doesn't respond immediately, Soap continues on. "What're your intentions with the lass? Plan on makin' er' an honest woman? Think she's in love?"

"Doesn't matter. She's mine. I've got plans, Johnny."

Soap leans back in his chair, scoffing a little while still grinning. "Aye, I'm sure. Always wanted to be a best man." He means it as a joke, but what Simon replies is dead serious.

"I'll do you one better 'n make you an uncle."

Soap gawks a little at that, before making his way over to Simon and grasping his shoulder. "Imagine that, little ghosties runnin' 'round. Never took you for a family man but with a lass like that, who could blame you." He jabs a finger into his chest. "Just put a ring on it aye?"

Soap was convinced that Simon was the epitome of "confused but has the right spirit". Sure he was doing things a little out of order, but it was a miracle the broody bloke found someone like you in the first place.

"Aye. Plan on making 'er a proper wife."

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

When Simon texts you that night, a simple 'I'll be there in an hour.', you figured it was your typical hookup. Still, you had baked cookies and tidied the apartment like you were a doting little girlfriend. After months of being with Simon, but not really being with Simon, you were often confused with the complicated relationship.

When Simon lets himself in through the front door right as your bent over retrieving the cookies from the oven, and watches as your face lights up at the sight of him, he's never been less confused. He finds himself with his hands gripping your hips, ignoring your questions of how he is and if he wants to try a cookie. His nose fills with your perfume and the warm smell of sweets and he's so overwhelmed with how content he feels.

You were home. You were his.

He guides you to the edge of the counter, grasping your plush thighs in his hands and hoisting you to sit on the cold marble, your hands grasping his shoulders as you giggle. He gives you a small smile and spreads your legs, fingers tracing your inner thigh.

He kisses you, and you're no longer confused when he whispers "Whaddya think 'bout marriage?" in your ear, and later, when he was between your legs, a raspy "How 'bout children?"

It was going to be a long night.

[trekbec82]

Absolutely nailed the first four, but I think you got Archer wrong. I think rather than spacist he's just sheltered. He's more like that "he a little confused but he got the spirit" gif than MAGA.

I think I’ve finally cracked it

[eggcompany]

Jayce is a big Christmas boy. He loves putting up lights and decorating the tree and making gingerbread houses. He wears special sweaters and vests, he hums songs as he works. He’s got a candy cane in his mouth 24/7. He says he’s got holiday spirit from his father, but really it keeps him from spiraling down, keeps the panic attacks at bay and his mind from darker places. He stays up at night and stares at his Christmas tree, his fireplace, drinking a hot cup of instant cocoa. Safe and warm, with his friends and mother, plenty of food and company.

Viktor never did Christmas. They didn’t do Christmas. They did have a summer celebration, but it was mostly about having babies and lighting fireworks. When he started being friends with Jayce it was spring. So they were deeply involved when Christmas rolled around. Jayce’s mother dressed him in knitted scarves and sweaters, they gave him tumblers of cocoa to warm his hands, and most of all Jayce explained the gifts.

People give a gift to those who matter most to them. People they appreciate. Gift exchange.

Viktor panicked for weeks before the Christmas. He goes through stores and shops and craftsman looking for something for the three people he needs gifts for. He ends up with a new knife block of ivory handled knives for Jayce’s mother, a set of very nice pens and a few notebooks for Sky, and he was stuck on Jayce for too long. He had to keep thinking of something his partner would like.

He ended up getting Jayce something small. A simple pack of colored pencils and a sketchbook. For blueprints and his endless doodling.

Jayce cried, Sky smile and thanked him, and Ximena hugged him and said she loved it and that he’s a very good boy.

Viktor didn’t know what to say when gift after gift was handed to him, saying they were making up for lost time. Hoodies, sweatshirts, wool socks, mittens, hats, a blanket, books, new chalk, and a few little things. He didn’t know what to do. It was too much.

It was late when he cried and Jayce consoled him, hugging him whispering about all the traditions. Viktor didn’t even notice when they were suddenly standing in a doorway. Jayce looked up, pulling his gaze up to the plant hanging there. Viktor was confused until Jayce explained mistletoe. Share a kiss with whoever you get caught under the branch with.

Suddenly he very much liked Christmas.

[acebytaemin]

lino explaining the concept of evolution

[chanafehs]

cullen: i hear people say salman i like him to each other all the time here, who is salman? is he famous?

IM CRYIFNJSJSKW

Please you just reminded me of this

[andisupreme]

At the company retreat, one extremely drunk girl asked what my pronouns were. (Eventually, it took her a while to word the question.) After the whole conversation was done, she goes- "YEAHHH GURL, Get on with--with THY bad self! See what I did?? They/them/thy."

I was almost holding back tears from trying not to laugh as I told her yes that's great you nailed it honey. Thank you very much I am feeling the love.

Anyway I've been assigned Thee/Thine at Supportive Drunk Girl

[glitter-stained]

Random goon: Hey boss, were you the one to pick that name as an alias? And why this one?

Red Hood : I used to have another name, before... A long time ago. But that person is dead now. I get to choose for myself now, they can't take that from me. I won't let them.

Goon: Huh.

***

Random Goon: Say boss, why do you never take off your shirt in front of us?

Red Hood: Well uh, I actually have that really fucked scar on my chest and I'm not comfortable with...

Random Goon: Don't worry boss, we get it, you don't have to explain yourself to us.

***

Red Hood, high on some toxin: God, I wish my family...

Random Goon (on boss-sitting duty): why not try reaching out to them?

Red Hood: They would never accept me as I am now... They wouldn't agree with my so-called "life choices". Besides, they don't miss me, they miss the person they think I used to be... I wasn't even a man when I last saw them.

Random Goon: Damn boss, that sucks.

***

And then the goons throw the Red Hood a party on trans visibility day and Jason is so confused he straight up cries.

[divorcedtom]

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE S1E2 + S2E7

[longdaytogo]

taking your wizard boyfriend out on a muggle ride

[adobe-outdesign]

confused but well-meaning Alakazam that overhead that its trainer didn't "have enough spoons to do the laundry today" and now keeps spawning in dozens of literal spoons to try and help them out

[mickules]

Happy Pride?

---

[♥] [♥]

Another entry in Taka's accidental adventures in insulting people.

As someone who has an allergy to face-paint I have to duck and weave when folk bring out the rainbow face-paint sticks at pride, and I always have the urge to justify myself...

But no one believes you if you say something like 'I swear, I'm not honophobic! I just have an allergy!'

an "Allergy" indeed...

[ruubesz-draws]

Yes, I'm late.

But I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas/Holiday!🎅

Shin and Minus One were just excited and happy to see Santa. They a little confused but they got the spirit!

And no, Santa is not dead... Just... frightened :)

[31n13]

Action Comics #8

[mumblesplash]

mean gills + nosy neighbors = gossip squad

[clementine221b]

one thing that this little gay kitty oncologist is going to do is LIE. even though he knows house will take the extremest of measures to try and find out what he’s upto??? but he can’t help himself?? i don’t understand him but i love him.