#he really gets the character and I’ve never seen an actor who just loves their own character so much

[abstract-venus]

If Payneland has a million fans, Jayden Revri is one of them

If Payneland has 1 fan, Jayden Revri is THAT ONE

If Payneland has no fans, the fucking Netflix execs got him

10 more seasons or 0 more seasons

Canon ship or not canon

He will always support them

¡VIVA LOS CHICOS DE MEURTOS!

[thehmn]

I wanted to make this post because we don’t see a lot of asexual characters in western media and despite him being from a hugely popular show (Seaside Hotel) you’re unlikely to know of his existence if you’re not from Denmark.

His name is Hjalmar Aurland and he’s one of the more sympathetic and realistic asexual characters I’ve seen. He lives in a time and place where asexuality as a concept doesn’t exist yet so he’s never labeled as such but rewatching the show made me realize that he acts exactly like the asexual people I personally know. Asexuality can mean a lot of things but his specific brand isn’t naive to sex nor is he repulsed by sex, sexual desire or thoughts simply doesn’t come naturally to him.

He can be convinced to have sex with his wife Helene but only if she appeals to their emotional bond. Just so you don’t get the wrong idea, he’s not being forced or emotionally blackmailed to sleep with her. It’s simply that he understands sex is a way to show emotional love too and he wants to express that love for Helene when it’s important to her, and seeing as sex isn’t unpleasant to him, just kinda boring, he’s willing to do that for her.

Unfortunately that isn’t enough for Helene and despite her love for Hjalmar she starts an affair with the dramatic and emotional actor Edward Weyse. He has a string of relationships, marriages and divorces behind him because despite what it may look like from the outside Edward doesn’t really want shallow sexual relationships. He just can’t help himself and keep falling in love with women left and right, fully and wholeheartedly, only to be dumped or dump them once the initial excitement has passed.

So Helene and Edward’s affair that was only meant to satisfy their carnal desires quickly becomes romantic. Helene feels torn between him and Hjalmar who she still loves and Edward understands the difficult situation they’re both in while also feeling jealous of Hjalmar. And Hjalmar? He doesn’t catch on for years. He’s not stupid but his brain just doesn’t jump to sex. He just assumes they’re good friends and why shouldn’t his wife be allowed to have friends, even male ones? Things get really complicated when Helene gets pregnant and she has to have sex with Hjalmar so he won’t wonder how it happened. Edward even has to join in on the seduction, reminding Hjalmar how much Helene loves him, even though it breaks Edward’s heart to do so.

But like I’ve said Hjalmar isn’t stupid. He saw the signs but chose to ignore them until one night when Helene accidentally says Edward’s name. It breaks the dam in Hjalmar’s denial and he has to face that deep down he always knew. Overcome by sadness and betrayal he wanders off into the night in nothing but his nightgown and gets a room at a different hotel where he can think in peace. Eventually he agrees to return to the first hotel with Helene and Edward and decides to take control of the situation.

He sits them both down and tells them that he understands that the three of them share a bond and that there are things he can’t really do for Helene so from now on he wants their relationship to be open and honest. He wants Helene and Edward to keep seeing each other and Edward is welcome in their house, but Hjalmar wants to be allowed to call Edward by his first name and makes it very clear that Helene and Edward’s children “belong to him” because he still thinks of himself as their dad and loves them as his own children. Both Helene and Edward agrees to it, though the emotional Edward is very flustered and confused by the acceptance and love he’s being shown by Hjalmar.

This is obviously a very tv drama situation but I was so stuck by how much Hjalmar acts like my asexual friends. Having a lover for your partner isn’t the most common solution but it’s an idea I’ve heard a lot of asexual people be open to under the right circumstances and of course that’s the most dramatic solution for a romantic tv drama.

Hjalmar is defined by so much more than his sexuality though. His main characteristic is his passion for social justice and equality, and other than some early show weirdness before they really cemented the characters, Hjamler is the only character who floats freely between the men and women. He’s just as likely to sit with the men as he is the women, often appearing in otherwise entirely female spaces. It’s never questioned or even brought up, not because he’s a “safe asexual” but because he cares and think their worries are as important as the men’s. He’s often called a pessimist by the other men when in reality he is determined to be hopeful and compassionate and spread the love he feels the world is lacking as WWII draws closer.

So yeah, I just wanted to share this sweet ace guy with you because you probably wouldn’t have known about him otherwise.

[lilislegacy]

Okay, I’m so gonna get hate for this. And it will probably get about 4 notes. This is, by far, the most opinionated thing I have ever posted on here. If you can’t tolerate criticism towards Rick Riordan, the books, or the TV show, please keep scrolling. My goal is NOT to change your mind or start arguments.

I also want to preface this by saying that I love and respect Rick Riordan (even if I disagree with him on things and don’t like some of his choices) and fully acknowledge that he has the right to do whatever the hell he pleases with his own series. I also want to say that I love Annabeth Chase (both the book and tv show version) with my entire being and you will never find me being an Annabeth hater. She’s my girl.

We good? Okay cool. So here’s the thing: I’ve seen a lot of people on here saying things like “If you didn’t like the books, you just don’t know how to have fun,” and “The new book haters are just mad that they aren’t the target audience anymore,” and (my personal favorite) “Nothing in the books has changed, only the readers have.”

And while I see your points, and I respect you, allow me to show you something. Because of the 10 picture limit, I am only going to focus on one specific change: Annabeth’s view of Percy.

WOTTG: Annabeth is surprised to be comforted by Percy

Past Books: Percy is constantly comforting Annabeth

WOTTG: Annabeth is shocked when Percy is smart

Past Books: Annabeth often points out that Percy is intelligent

WOTTG: Annabeth thinks Percy can’t do anything on his own, and Rick communicates that Annabeth is always saving his ass

Past Books: Percy is ALWAYS watching her back, and saving her ass just as much (and Annabeth admits that)

I could put a hundred quotes in here. I could go on and on and on. But I can’t, and I won’t.

My problem with this new book is NOT that it is more goofy than serious. My problem is NOT that little things have changed. My problem is NOT that it’s just for fun. My problem is NOT that it’s much more childish. (And by the way, I’ve read PJO and HOO as an adult, so it’s not like I was a child when I read everything else and am now an adult reading the new ones.) I really did like and enjoy many parts of this book.

My problem is that the characters (especially Annabeth) have flat out changed—in bad ways—and we have no choice but to accept it as canon. My problem is that Rick, while trying to merge his books with his new TV show project, is changing the entire personalities and past behaviors/ tendencies of the characters.

I loved Chalice of the Gods. You know why? It was fun, goofy, and showed the characters that we know and love being happy and adorable. I strongly dislike Wrath of the Triple Godess because the characters—no matter how adorable and happy they might be—are no longer the ones we know and love.

My problem is that Rick Riordan fully admitted that he no longer considers the old book characters when he writes the new books. He is now purposefully incorporating his own personal mixture of the book characters and tv characters and writing those versions instead. Because of his desire to change and transform the series, I doubt he’s even read the original PJO or HOO books in years, which is why everything is so inconsistent. The old book characters—the ones who made the series what it was—are gone. And that is not my opinion. Rick fully admits that he doesn’t imagine them when he writes anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE the tv show actors. I adore Walker and Leah and Aryan with my whole heart, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything. But the fact is: they will never be exactly like the book characters. It’s impossible for actors to become the words on a page. They’re their own unique version! And likewise, you cannot turn actors into print. It doesn’t work! And why would you try? The books versions were perfect as they were. And the disney kids need to make the characters their own. The two versions can exist side by side, equally as wonderful, and still be gloriously different. We should celebrate the uniqueness of both. But instead, Rick is attempting to merge them into one. And in my opinion, it’s just hurting them both. And I’m gonna get real brave by saying this, but do you want my honest prediction? If he keeps doing what he’s doing now, the TV show is going to get cancelled and the books are going to turn into a joke. I so, so badly hope that this doesn’t happen! I have loved Rick and PJO for many, many years. I badly want both to thrive. But what is going on right now… it is not working, no matter how much we all want it to. And speaking as someone who knows people in the TV/Film industry, I am sadly not the only one who thinks the show is gonna flop. Which is devastating, because Rick Riordan deserves a redemption on the big screen, and the incredible actors deserve to bring this series to life in a new way.

I am not trying to force my opinions onto anybody. You are welcome to disagree with me and move on. I am not saying that I’m right and you’re wrong. If you disagree, that’s okay. If you agree but you don’t have a problem with it, that’s okay. In fact if other people have literally no issues, that makes me somewhat happy. And if you loved the book, I’m honestly so stoked for you. Feel free to just keep on scrolling, my friend.

But me? I’m sad. I’m really, really freaking sad. And I’m a little angry too, even if I don’t have a right to be. I can’t help it because I’m only human. But this is how I—and a lot of other people—feel. And you know what? That’s okay too. Because the fact of the matter is:

Annabeth isn’t the same Annabeth anymore. And Percy isn’t the same Percy anymore. And it’s not because they went through trauma, or because time has passed. It’s because Rick Riordan doesn’t have any interest in writing those versions of them anymore. And I think the comparisons between the old and the new show that fact pretty clearly.

[n30n-l1ghts]

Okay, I need to rant. Fuck AI. And I mean seriously. FUCK. A.I. I know I’m probably preaching to the choir here, but more people need to be talking about this, and there’s no point in me saying that if I’m not willing to talk about it too. AI has done nothing but ruin our communities and defile the art that millions of hands have spent millions of hours creating. Fanfiction is a work of passion. Drawing is a work of passion. Voice acting IS A WORK OF PASSION. AI has no passion. It takes the soul out of the things we love and cherish. It steals what we as a collective community have lovingly crafted, and it shatters it to a thousand pieces, spits on it, curses its family, and throws it in a flaming dumpster to be eaten by rats. It is despicable and disgusting.

I won't lie, or pretend I’m a perfect saint. I myself was a user of Character AI until somewhat recently. And as ashamed as I am to admit that, I feel it’s necessary to own up to my own faults. But after seeing the damage it causes, I can’t in good conscience even consider touching that site. Many of us write because it is our passion. Many of us because it is our job. And many of us because it is our *friend*. AI steals the writing of your favorite creators WITHOUT PERMISSION and mashes it together like Frankenstein’s fucked up monster to create storylines that aren’t even fucking coherent. Not only that, but Character AI uses whatever you respond to it with to teach itself as well, which means that the company has access to whatever you chat about, and free reign to do whatever they want with it. They also make absurd amounts of money from it, which in comparison, fanfiction writers, who spend countless hours writing stories for our favorite characters, more often than not charge nothing. And the ones who do charge, tend to have reasonable, if not highly lenient prices for their labor.

Which leads me into another side rant. SUPPORT WRITERS THAT YOU LIKE. It’s really not that hard, it takes two fucking seconds of your time and it makes someone's day. Reblog. Share with your friends. Like. Comment. Just let the writer know that you saw it, and that you liked it. The amount of fanfic writers I have seen get completely discouraged from writing because of lack of engagement is astounding. I’ve seen several posts on Tumblr or Twitter or Bluesky talking about creators that were incredibly popular but never knew it due to lack of engagement is appalling. If you can rant about your love for their work on Discord, you can rant about your love for their work in the comments. Just fucking copy paste it. Tell them how much you love it. Show them support. Especially the ones that don’t charge. Because for those of us that don’t, our only payment, is your feedback. Even constructive criticism is greatly appreciated by damn near every writer I can think of. Because even that shows that you read it, absorbed it, and thought about it enough to have something to actually say about it.

The same thing goes for artists and voice actors. You see a drawing or animation you enjoy? Comment. Like. Share. You see a character in an anime or a game and you love their voice? Go check out their voice actor, maybe they do some other cool stuff, and you might just discover your new favorite series or streamer. A perfect example is Alejandro Saab. I became a fan of his through his astounding performance in several series dear to me, and lo and behold, he’s also a streamer I enjoy. Same story with Aleks Le, or Ray Chase. Yuri Lowenthal, Lizzie Freeman, Landon Mcdonald, Zeno Robinson, the list goes on. But seriously, it’s not that much effort to just show a little love to the creators you enjoy. The people who breathe life into the series’ that we all hold dear. AI does not breathe that life. Using AI, and supporting those companies, will destroy those pillars of our community. And if that happens, the AI would crumble too, it would have no new information to use. SO really, what’s the benefit? I’ll tell you. There is none.

Stop using AI. All it does is bring harm and slowly kill our community. It’s disgusting, appalling, and downright fucking egregious.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

[0-therw-0-rldly]

I’ll preface this by saying I’m not really a shipper. I just enjoy canon couples on TV Series/films.

Terms I’d like B*ddies to remove from their vocabulary because they don’t know how to use them correctly:

Media literacy: For a group that uses this term a lot you sure do misinterpret everything in this show.

Queerbaiting: Going to expand on this one. A show that’s already been pre established for having queer characters simply cannot queerbait.

Ship baiting: While sometimes you can argue that they could be doing that, that’s only if you look at the show in a very biased manner. You might think this is the case but the general audience doesn’t think the way you do.

Ship war: This isn’t a one tree hill situation where there was Team Brooke Vs. Team Peyton where the middle guy (Lucas Scott) had canonically been with both women. This is people not understanding fanon vs. canon and not being able to just watch the show. It’s like playing quarterback on Madden and thinking you could be better than Patrick Mahomes.

Plot device: everything’s a plot device. Move tf on.

Predator: You sound like crazy MAGA supporters calling everything regarding the LGBTQIA+ community as predatory. Sit down.

Co-parenting: I know this is a big one and discourse was brought up during the hiatus. Oliver and Ryan have loosely mentioned this years ago but it was never to be taken this seriously. Do y’all even know what co-parenting is or are you that big of a donut? Buck is someone who loves his best friend deeply and by extension, his kid too. Him taking care of him frequently does not make him a co-parent. Maybe he is a parental or uncle figure, but he isn’t a co-parent. Also, I swear y’all need to learn how a will works. He is a GODPARENT, not a GUARDIAN. Stfu.

Hag: This especially applies to women, but to say that someone 25-30+ is a hag for still being in fandoms or enjoying tv shows/films is inherently misogynistic. Men are never held to this much criticism for enjoying fictional media, but women aren’t allowed to?

Queer Coding: people of the same sex “looking at each other”, hugging, or having intimate moments all together doesn’t make them queer coded. It could mean that they just love each other that deeply platonically. While representation is amazing and just because you interpret a character as queer coded (just like my ship baiting comment) doesn’t mean others interpret it that way as well. In addition, network TV has stipulations, and also actors are allowed to decline storylines. Ryan has mentioned his character is heterosexual an abundance of times which means (at least for now) that he isn’t willing to go for this storyline.

Dead naming: Y’all construing the fact that Buck wants people like coworkers and some of his former love interests, to saying Evan is his dead name is inherently transphobic because do you even understand what a dead name is? Evan Buckley is shown as being fine with being called Evan by both Tommy and his sister. I’m pretty sure some of his love interests have called him Evan as well.

Fetishizing: You guys saw two hot guys who “looked at each other” and for 6 seasons have wanted nothing but to see those two make out with each other. Those of us who enjoy Tevan saw Buck giddy at the thought of Tommy and have wanted domestic fluff for them since.

Anything to do with racism, homophobia, and misogyny: I’ve seen the way you guys have conveniently weaponized Henren and by extension Aisha/Tracie when you didn’t get the Ryan/Oliver interview, don’t try to act like you’re morally superior. Not to mention wanting a canonically gay man to die in a show and not even holding those who use your ship name to write CSA fics accountable because you’re petty and want to throw hissy fits. Anyone looking at your comments as an outsider would think you’re homophobes and yes queer people can be homophobic.

I do hope you can expand your vocabulary. 🤍

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

On David Tennant and Aging

So, I’ve seen a lot of posts in response to Tumblr users’ habit of affectionately calling their favorite middle aged dudes “old men”, David Tennant in particular, saying things like “clearly you’ve never met an actual old person”, “omg you talk about these guys like they’re 80”, “please be normal about people aging”, etc. And on one hand, all of these statements are objectively right and true! But as someone who’s always been really fascinated by and found a lot of beauty in getting older (which I’ve explored in some of my writing on A03 because nobody else is going to do it for me), I’d like to provide a bit more nuance on how I think this label applies to David in particular.

David, obviously, in literal terms, is not “old”, at least not to me- I don’t personally consider people old until they get past 60. 52 is middle aged, simple as that. And yet, when I see David stuck with the “old man” label, it still somehow feels weirdly right, for a number of reasons.

It annoys me so much when people say David “hasn’t aged a day since Doctor Who”, because, well…

He clearly has. A lot. He’s got forehead creases, deep crows’ feet and eyebags, and I think that post-Fourteen we’re gonna see him rocking the grey temples a LOT more. He also has the voice of an older man now, his upper range is still there but the default is much more deep and rich, with a gravelly, rumbling quality that just goes straight through you. I personally think Broadchurch was when David finally started to embrace looking his age- Alec Hardy just wouldn’t have been served by Ten’s fresh-faced boyishness.

Obviously, these are the kinds of changes you’d expect any 52-year-old man to have, but something about David just makes it all seem a bit more… intense? The expressiveness of his face combined with his almost gaunt frame makes his wrinkles very prominent, and when he works his voice to its emotional extremes, his lower register can sound positively ancient, to devastating effect.

David, I think, is someone with an old soul- I don’t think he could be as good as he is at playing ancient characters like Crowley and The Doctor if he weren’t. He has lived so many lives, given so much of himself to so many characters, often incredibly tragic ones, and I think it wears on him. David also has five kids. FIVE. Do you know how exhausting it is to be one of the hardest working actors alive and be a present, loving father to even ONE child? But David somehow does it anyway! Nowadays I see him and my heart breaks because he looks so tired, so weary and fragile. But he’s all the more beautiful for it to me because I know that that is because he is kind. He’s a deeply empathetic person who feels and lives to the absolute fullest, and that story is written so clearly on his face, along with every other story he has ever been a part of.

There’s other things about David that make the label endearingly fitting- his utter hopelessness when it comes to technology, for instance. And he’s just got that warm, wise, grandpa energy too sometimes- look at that above Fourteen picture and tell me I’m wrong!

I once showed my friend who’d only seen David in Doctor Who and Harry Potter a picture of David from Around The World in 80 Days. It was a particularly emotional scene, and his face had just the most beautiful expression of compassion and sadness, every wrinkle on full display. And she said, in a less than complimentary fashion, “he looks so old!” Which, of course, offended me quite a bit at first. But to me, referring to David as old almost feels like a badge of honor, something he’s earned by living fully and selflessly, working hard and being wise and compassionate beyond his years. I think David himself is secretly more than a little insecure about the fact that he’s getting older. There’s sadness behind every jovially self-depreciating remark he’s made about his age in the past year, particularly in comparing himself to Ncuti Gatwa. I know how much David struggles with his impostor syndrome and how people perceive him, and I can clearly see in his eyes the fear of being discarded, the anxiety he feels about if he’ll still be as loved as he was back in 2007 now that he’s closer in age to King Lear than he is to Romeo. So I hope David knows it’s a privilege to watch him grow older, to watch his soul and talents deepen with the crinkles around his eyes. If I, in my silly goofy tumblr girl-ness, call David Tennant an old man, it’s because it’s a label that suits him beautifully- even if it isn’t TECHNICALLY an accurate one yet.

[g1rld1ary]

red carpets - actor!sirius black x actress!reader

wc: 942

cw: none! you catch sight of sirius on the red carpet

tag: @lovemenotts

The sheer amount of noise surrounding you was making you light-headed. Yet, you plastered on a smile, smoothed out your silky skirt and stepped onto the red carpet. Your smile didn’t budge as you inched down the carpet, performing for the hungry cameras and the sometimes scary men behind them. You grit your teeth as they yell commands, changing pose as they desire, waiting to get to the interview portion of the red carpet. At least the journalists had to be polite to you.

A woman from some gossip rag you purposefully avoid reading calls you over and you consciously boost your smile again, turning up the energy to 100. She’s nice, at least, and a good conversationalist. Too many interviewers left you to pick up their slack and carry the conversation as if it weren’t their job to be digging for the information they want.

“How does it feel to be nominated for an Emmy in your first foray into television?” She asks and you beam.

“It’s such an honour, really. I mean, this show is such a labour of love, Lily put her heart and soul into the writing, so I’m just so grateful I got to be the one to bring it to life. It’s so amazing that we’re both being nominated tonight,” You answer with a practised grace, giving a glance to the camera behind the interviewer.

The conversation continues and you find yourself enjoying it more than you anticipated. The interviewer connects with you well and matches your excited energy at being around celebrities. You figure it’s about time you move on, but give her one more question as a secret reward for her not being as invasive as the others usually are. She asks about your friendship with Lily and creating a project with someone you’d known forever and you grin again.

You start your answer, gushing over Lily’s talent for screenwriting and your friendship of ten years. You turn to look for her, meaning to gesture when your eyes get caught on something. Someone.

“Who is that?” You ask the interviewer, pointing out the most gorgeous man you’d ever seen in your life. Long dark hair, dressed in all black with silver jewellery glinting in the flash of cameras, you basically fall in love at first sight.

“That’s Sirius Black,” The interviewer answers with a laugh.

“God, what is he from?” He’s honestly supernaturally good-looking, you’re not convinced he’s real.

“He co-created and stars in The Marauders series, you haven’t seen it yet?”

“No, I’ve been meaning to but I haven’t had the time — Lils says it really has to be appreciated so I’m waiting to dedicate significant time to it. He did not look like that on the poster.” The series is set in high school and so all the actors look different, younger, Sirius no exception. The dark eyeliner around his grey eyes creates a magnetic contrast that makes him look much more mature than his character.

“Is it safe to say you’ll be finding him at the after-party?” The interviewer asks cheekily. The situation comes back to you in an instant; you’re on camera and who knows how many people are seeing you thirst over another actor in real-time.

“God no,” You laugh, frantically trying to brush over the incident, “I don’t chase after boys. He’d have to work for my attention.” You wink in an attempt to deliver the joke and it goes over smoothly enough, the interviewer graciously letting it go and thanking you for your time. You thank her profusely.

You chance another glance at Sirius as you move on, all grace and long limbs as he effortlessly poses for photos and messes around with his co-stars, spirit not yet beaten out of him by Hollywood. You envy the way his cast talk all the way through the process, clearly extremely fond of each other. You would go to the ends of the earth for Lily, your best friend and writer of the show you star in, but your male lead couldn’t be more opposite. Severus Snape was someone you would never get along with, and your interviews consisted of forced smiles and camaraderie on your side and zero effort from him. You would love a cast like The Marauders, not that you would dare complain to Lily, who had given you so much.

You don’t end up meeting Sirius during the awards or the afterparty, unfortunately, though you do see him once more across the room and feel the flutter of intrigue in your stomach. The next awards ceremony you had a goal, and a series to watch in the meantime.

LOVE IS ON THE RED CARPET? EMMY WINNER ADMIRES NOMINEE SIRIUS BLACK

The clip from that interview goes viral, both your fans and Sirius’ dissecting every frame of the videos. Some focus on the subtle up-and-down you give him, slowing it down to a snail’s pace to catch every eye movement. Others focus on Sirius, swearing they could see his eyes flick over to you for a fraction of a second. The ultimate conclusion is that you two should be in love, or already are, and fan edits of both you and your characters are already surfacing on TikTok.

You sigh from your hotel bed, scrolling through an endless amount of photos of him and yourself. Your publicist would not be happy with you. Although, it could be a pretty good marketing strategy.

[hunter470]

My 9-1-1 RANT

Ok, I don’t normally do these types of posts, but I can’t move on until I get some things out. These are just my thoughts about the latest episodes of 9-1-1 as well as overall comments on the Buck/Tommy relationship. These opinions are mine and are based on the countless hours of TV I’ve watched in my 54 years on this planet, as well as my knowledge of writing and how Hollywood operates. I’m not confirming that any of this is true or are the real intentions of anyone involved with the show. Just my opinions. So, you can agree with me or not. I’m not trying to persuade anyone in any way. Also, I’m not going to get into endless arguments about my opinions but feel free to comment if you want, I just don’t promise I’ll reply. 

Ok, here we go. Sorry it’s so long. Like I said earlier, I just needed to get it out. So many wasted opportunities.

If you think TM cares what the fans want, you’re seriously kidding yourself. If he did, Buddie would have been canon a long time ago. The only thing he cares about is ratings and his vision for the show, which can change at a moment’s notice with no rhyme or reason as we’ve seen. 

Although I loved Buck and Tommy together, I knew the show wouldn’t do their story justice. So, no matter what TM or OS have said, the bi story was only to garner publicity, draw in new viewers, and increase ratings especially with the show moving to a new network. There was no altruistic reason behind it so don’t kid yourself. They knew there was an audience for the story because of all the Buddie shippers. Just remember, it’s called show business, not show friends for a reason.

Do you think OS really cares about bi representation? Based on his latest comments and non-apology it’s obvious he only cares about getting the stories that garner him the most screen time and press. Seriously, read his latest interviews. He’s excited to get to have fun now. So, congrats OS, Buck gets to F around. Just shows how most, if not all, actors are ego driven no matter what they say. Sorry not sorry.

TM has commented that he doesn’t owe anyone anything. In fact, I recall him saying to Buddie fans if they don’t like it, read fanfiction. If that didn’t clue you in, then you weren’t reading the room. Kinda reminds me of another show runner…for those who watched H50 you know who I’m talking about. That’s why I don’t get heavily invested in these shows. I’ll watch but I never expect anything I like to last…especially if it has to do with gay relationships.

It says a lot that the show remained completely silent about the bullying and death threats Lou received just for playing a role he was happy to play. Again, they really didn’t care because they knew he wasn’t going to be there after episode six. What a great message for all the bullies…just keep bullying and you’ll get what you want. 

Again, reread OS’s interviews. He was doing the Hollywood double speak. Says just enough to keep you hooked with hope to get you to watch even when he knew all along it wasn’t lasting. It really was as clear as day if you go back and read what he said. 

Also, if you thought Buck was going to get into a meaningful long-term relationship, then you didn’t watch the video from the You Tuber “Call Me Chato” that TM posted on his Facebook. The video was all about characters and how they should always stay fundamentally the same with minimal development - I’m paraphrasing. However, Buck is the golden retriever, heart so big it gets broken, character who will remain on a hamster wheel and unlucky in love because that’s who he is. If he changes too much it shifts the dynamic, which only happens if the show was ending. 

If you thought the writers would do justice to a bisexual story, then you haven’t been watching the show closely. There’s been minimal Buck/Tommy relationship development on screen. Taylor got more. Viewers were lucky to get crumbs in the limited screen time Buck and Tommy got. Then, a breakup out of left field? One minute Buck is saying Tommy is it for him and he wants him to move in, and then it’s over? If he truly felt deeply for Tommy, why not fight to keep him? Why give up so easily and let him walk away? What’s the point? Also, to end it on a terrible stereotype is yet another clue. Horrible writing and another sign that TM and OS had zero investment in the relationship. The whole break up was rushed and made no sense. Essentially, it was just used to draw people in and to get Buck single and sleeping around again because that’s who he is. I for one won’t care for any of Buck’s future relationships. I mean, why would I when they never last. 

Also, writers that give you a 66-year-old police sergeant and a 10 y/o boy landing a heavily damaged plane on an active freeway in LA with no prior training, and sorry playing video game flight simulators is not training, is some Sharknado level writing, which is not a compliment. Oh, and that whole story was truly the shows “jumping the shark” moment. If you don’t know what the term “jumping the shark” means, look it up and try to tell me I’m wrong. 

Not having Tommy involved in the three part premier episodes, other than a few minutes at a birthday party, was so obvious as to the show’s intent. I mean, the fake captain from Hotshots got more screen time. 

They claim they wanted someone for Buck that was connected to him and the 118 and then you don’t use the character at all. You wanted Buck off the hamster wheel? What a crock! Such a wasted opportunity.

Since it’s been confirmed episode 6 was filmed before 5, Tim’s just playing god with peoples’ feelings and crushing their hearts at this point. I mean, how do you have such a great episode (5) and a wonderful speech by Josh (6) just to break them up? Plus, having Tommy break up after six months? That man was all in, which was obvious in episode 5.

Guess it shouldn’t be a surprise that’s how TM would handle things after that horrible Tarlos breakup. At least on Lone Star we knew Rafa (Carlos) was a main cast member so there was hope. Lou was a guest star so it seems kinda final based on his interviews. Again, what was the point? They could have had Buck's bi revelation be with a random character. So, building up the Buck/Tommy relationship just to take it away was to inflict the most pain. Good job. 

Do I think the show will make Buddie canon? Who knows…one thing I do know is I wouldn’t trust them if they did. Also, even if Tommy somehow returns, I don’t trust TM with anything related to this story. Sure, hope he’s happy with ruining the show for so many people. Again, like another show runner I mentioned in item 4 above. Honestly, I can’t believe the Buddie fans have stayed for so long. That’s commitment, I guess. 

Do I think Lou should go back to 9-1-1? Hell no! He was screwed over by both TM and OS. Prove it to me otherwise. However, it’s up to him and of course, he loves acting so I wouldn’t blame him.

Finally, even though I’ve watched the show since the beginning, it no longer brings me joy. There are too many other TV shows to stick with one I no longer enjoy. So yes, I’m announcing my departure, and I don’t give an F what OS, you, or anyone else thinks about it. Not that any of this matters any way…

[brokenlovesong]

The JPC Darrel analysis I promised

Alright guys same deal as the last with just as much chaos. Sorry this took three years

Anyways. JPC DARREL LETS GET INTO IT

So he plays the youngest Darrel, no doubt. He’s tall but much smaller both physically and the way he portrays himself on stage. Using this he really plays into it. He’s a much less angry Darrel, more tied than anything else.

I think runs in the family reprise is where his version of Darrel really shines. He plays it very differently from Brent, Victor, or even Dan. He’s just so tired of it all. He doesn’t even start yelling until the end once pony has pushed him to his brink. When he sits down during the “you don’t tell me when you’re coming home lately” line it’s much less confrontational. He’s trying to stay calm and reason with his brother. It’s not until the “tired of lifting you up” part that he’s finally losing control and breaking. That’s the first time I think I genuinely saw him angry and even then he’s consciously trying to reign himself in but pony keeps pushing. And dude he YELLS “You have no idea what I give up for you” and because he didnt spend the song nearly as angry as like Brent does, that scared me so much because he just snapped.

I wanna talk about the scene between Darrel and dally because that scene was done in a way I’ve never seen it before by both Jpc and Josh Boone. Jpc is a much less physically intimidating Darrel. Especially compared to Josh Boone. That was taken into account by both of them which I have to give so much praise for because they did such a wonderful job. Darrel went in thinking he could push dally into revealing. He clearly had no intent to fight him. He was taunting him. But let me tell you dally knew how to play Darrel like a fiddle. He knew exactly what buttons to push in a way Darrel couldn’t. While he normally yells half that scene, dally didn’t raise his voice ONCE. He was even SMILING at the end because he wanted Darrel to swing at him. Dally loves fights and he knows he could easily win against jpc Darrel. So he played him. Decided to see how far he could push because if Darrel swung he could easily take him. Absolutely fantastic scene and lemme tell you Josh Boone calmly speaking the last bit of the scene with a smile? ABSOLUTELY TERRIFYING

Now throwing in the towel. So jpc flubbed the first part and bro I’ve never been more stressed (probably not as stressed as him tho LMAO) but he managed to keep it together which I give him so much credit for. He took his anxiety and stress and used that as a focus for his acting the rest of the scene. Other actors usually play this scene as very defeated. But he was much more anxious about pony and what’s to come next. And tbh this is the most in it I’ve ever seen Jason. Now I love Jason but I have found his acting style to be more passive then I’d like in some scenes (JUST MY OPINION PLEASE DONT ATTACK ME) I think because of what happened to jpc not only was he soda trying to comfort Darrel, I saw Jason trying to comfort jpc and it made the scene so much more beautiful and strong.

Overall, jpc Darrel is wonderful. My only main issue is that I felt like he read too similar in age to Brody as ponyboy and frankly Jason read older than him. Nothing to do with his acting. Jpc is an incredible actor. But I just feel like with the cast the way they are, while he reads as Darrel’s actual age, much of the cast reads older than their characters and so this does affect how he’s seen.

I did see him as soda too, with Dan darry, and I thought he was literally like who I envisioned soda to be when I read the book. Like he gave such soda energy it was incredible

[movingmusically]

hiiii, i just wanted to say i read all of your austin fics and is unbelievable how good you write him!! like, it feels so real and so loyal to him and it made me fall even deeper for him.

I especially loved Feyd’s Darling and I was wondering if you could write a similar fic with actress!girlfriend but this time is austin who visits the set of HER movie and is present when she is filming and reminds her how proud he is of her 🥺 thank you <3

Word Count: 5,657

Masterlist

No Doubt, It’s Funny

You were barely through the door when your phone buzzed with an email notification, the familiar name in the sender line making you pause mid-step.

That’s weird.

It wasn’t unusual for actors to keep in touch after working together, but you and Paul Rudd had never been more than friendly colleagues—occasional social media likes, a warm greeting at industry events. You’d filmed together once, a drama, and you had always admired his work, but it had never gone beyond that.

Curious, you tapped the email open.

SUBJECT: I Think You’d Be Perfect For This Hey Y/N, I know this is a little out of the blue, but I just finished working on a script with some people I really trust, and I kept thinking about you for one of the lead roles. It’s different from what you’ve done before—more comedy than drama—but it’s got a lot of heart, and I think you’d absolutely crush it. I’m attaching the script—give it a read when you get a chance. No pressure, but I’d love to work with you on this. Let me know what you think. Paul Rudd

Your stomach fluttered with a mixture of surprise and intrigue. A comedy? That was definitely new. You loved a well-done comedy, but you’d never seen yourself in one—your career had been built on dramas, character-driven films with heavy emotions and intense scenes.

Before you could overthink it, you hit the download button and opened the script. You’d just skim a few pages.

Except, you didn’t stop skimming.

By page five, you were biting back a smile.

By page ten, you were laughing under your breath.

By page twenty, you were fully cackling, hand covering your mouth as you collapsed onto the couch, phone balanced on your knee.

The dialogue was fast, witty, smart. It had all the beats of a great comedy, but there was an undercurrent of sincerity—genuine heart threaded between the humour. It wasn’t just a joke machine; it meant something.

And the lead female role?

You loved her.

The character was a mess in the best way—sharp-witted but emotionally guarded, with a tendency to deflect with sarcasm. There was a moment in the third act, a shift from all the laughs into something real, that hit you so hard you actually felt your throat tighten.

You wanted to play her.

The thought was immediate, instinctive.

And terrifying.

Because you had never done anything like this before.

Your mind was already filling with doubt, What if I’m not funny enough? What if I ruin it?, but before you could spiral, a familiar voice interrupted your thoughts.

“Alright, what’s got you giggling like that?”

You looked up to see Austin, freshly showered from the gym, his hair still damp and a towel draped over his shoulder. His expression was amused, but there was something softer in his eyes—the kind of curiosity that came when he knew something had gotten under your skin in a good way.

You hesitated, then held up your phone. “I just got sent a script.”

His eyebrows lifted slightly as he walked over, dropping onto the couch beside you. “Oh yeah?”

You nodded, swallowing hard. “It’s a comedy.”

Austin didn’t react at first—just reached for the towel on his shoulder and ran it through his hair. Then he glanced at you sideways, lips twitching.

“…And?”

You sighed, staring at the screen in your hands. “And I kind of love it.”

Now that got his full attention.

Austin sat up straighter, eyebrows raised. “Wait. Really?”

You nodded. “It’s so funny, but it’s not just comedy for the sake of it. It actually has heart, you know? And the role—it’s different from anything I’ve done, but I can see it.”

Austin grinned, already excited. “Babe, that’s amazing. Who sent it?”

You told him, watching as his eyebrows lifted in recognition. “Oh damn, Paul sent it? That’s huge. He’s a genius with this kind of stuff.”

“I know,” you murmured, chewing the inside of your cheek. “Which is why I’m freaking out a little.”

Austin frowned slightly. “Freaking out why?”

You exhaled slowly, tapping your phone against your knee. “Because I don’t do comedy, Austin. I don’t have that thing comedians have. I don’t know how to deliver a joke. I don’t—”

“Okay, pause,” Austin interrupted, holding up a hand. “First of all, yes you do.”

You gave him an unimpressed look. “Austin.”

He just grinned. “No, I’m serious. You’re hilarious.”

You groaned, flopping back against the couch. “That doesn’t count. You laugh at me when I don’t mean to be funny.

“Which is exactly why it does count,” he argued, nudging your leg with his knee. “You don’t try to be funny, but you are. And that’s what makes it work.”

You shook your head, not convinced. “It’s different on screen.”

Austin tilted his head, considering you. Then he reached for your phone. “You want me to read it?”

You hesitated.

Then, with a deep breath, you handed it over.

You watch as Austin leans back against the couch, phone in hand, scrolling through the script with an unreadable expression. His brows furrow slightly in concentration, lips twitching at certain moments, his fingers tapping absently against his thigh as he reads. You try not to fidget, but the longer he stays silent, the more antsy you get.

“Well?” you press, unable to hold it in any longer.

Austin doesn’t look up immediately. Instead, he swipes to the next page, humming under his breath. “Hold on,” he mutters, eyes still glued to the screen. Then, out of nowhere, he huffs out a quiet laugh, shaking his head.

You sit up straighter. “What?”

He turns the phone toward you and points at a specific line of dialogue. “That’s what.”

Your eyes skim the line—the character delivering a dry, exasperated remark after a ridiculous situation unfolds.

“Oh, sure. This is fine. I always wanted to be covered in spaghetti in the middle of a funeral.”

You roll your eyes. “What? That’s just—”

Austin grins. “That’s you. That is exactly something you would say.”

Your mouth opens, ready to argue, but then you remember last week when you spilled an entire smoothie on yourself right before a press event and muttered something very similar. Austin had laughed so hard he’d had to sit down.

You groan, flopping back against the couch. “Okay, fine. But that doesn’t mean I can actually do it.”

Austin shifts closer, nudging your knee with his. “Babe. You are doing it. Just reading this, I can already hear you in the role. The way the humour is written—it’s natural, it’s quick, it’s sarcastic but in a way that’s not forced.” He taps the phone. “You don’t have to try to be funny. You just have to be you.”

You chew the inside of your cheek, staring at the ceiling. The part of you that fell in love with the script wants to believe him, wants to think you can pull this off. But that nagging voice in your head keeps whispering that you’re not built for this, that you’ll fall flat next to someone like Paul Rudd, who could deliver a joke in his sleep.

Austin nudges you again, softer this time. “What’s stopping you?”

You sigh. “I just—I don’t know if I have comedic timing. It’s different when you’re doing drama. With drama, you just feel it, you know? But comedy—comedy’s like this whole other skill set. And Paul Rudd? He’s—he’s Paul Rudd, Austin.”

Austin smirks. “I am aware.”

You shoot him a look. “I mean it. He’s been doing this forever. He’s so fast, so sharp. I’ll be up there with him, fumbling, and it’ll be painfully obvious that I don’t belong.”

Austin studies you for a moment, then sets the phone down and shifts so he’s facing you fully, his knee brushing against yours. “Okay. You remember the first time I told you about Dune?”

You blink. “Yeah?”

“And remember what I said? How I told you I didn’t think I could do it? That I wasn’t sure I could be Feyd?”

You nod slowly, already seeing where he’s going with this.

Austin tilts his head. “And what did you tell me?”

You huff. “That you were already him, you just didn’t know it yet.”

His lips curl. “Exactly.” He leans in a little. “And guess what? I was terrified. I spent months overthinking every detail, worried I wouldn’t measure up, that I’d make an ass of myself. But you were right. I was him. I just had to get out of my own way.”

You sigh, arms crossing over your chest. “So now you’re throwing my own words back at me?”

He grins. “Absolutely.”

You glare at him, but it’s half-hearted at best. He knows it, too.

“Look,” he continues, gentler now, “Paul Rudd—yeah, he’s a legend. But you know what makes him so good? He’s reactive. He plays off his scene partners. He’s brilliant at making other people better.”

You exhale, your walls slowly cracking.

Austin moves even closer, his voice dropping. “You don’t have to walk in there and be the funniest person in the room. You just have to be real. And I’ve seen you—hell, I have been on the receiving end of your one-liners when you’re annoyed. Your comedic timing? It’s already there.”

You chew your lip, fingers drumming against your knee. “And what if I suck?”

Austin shrugs. “Then you suck. But at least you tried something new. And knowing you? You won’t suck.”

You stare at him for a long moment, searching his face for any trace of doubt. But there’s none. Just that steady confidence, that quiet certainty that somehow makes you feel like you can do anything.

Slowly, you reach for your phone, scrolling to the email from Paul.

Austin watches as you hover over the reply button, still hesitating. He reaches out, lacing his fingers with yours, squeezing once. “Come on, baby. Take the leap.”

You inhale deeply.

Then, before you can overthink it again, you type out a quick reply:

I’m in. Let’s do this.

And hit send.

Austin whoops, pulling you into his arms, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “That’s my girl.”

You roll your eyes but can’t fight the smile creeping up your face. “If this goes horribly wrong, I’m blaming you.”

Austin just grins. “Deal. But when it goes amazingly right? You better give me all the credit.”

You shake your head, heart pounding, a mix of fear and excitement buzzing under your skin.

No turning back now.

You just agreed to star in a comedy with Paul Rudd.

And for the first time, instead of feeling terrified…

You feel ready.

The moment you hit send on that email, the real work begins.

You’ve never prepared for a role quite like this before. Usually, your pre-film ritual involves weeks of research, emotional deep dives, and long, introspective walks where you try to fully embody your character. But this time?

This time, preparation involves watching people trip over things on purpose.

Austin walks into the living room one evening to find you curled up on the couch, notebook in hand, staring at the screen in deep concentration.

His brows furrow. “Is that… Dumb and Dumber?”

You shush him, scribbling down something in your notebook. “Yes, and it’s important.”

Austin blinks, then grins. “Oh, this is gonna be fun.”

And it is—for him.

For the next few weeks, you dive headfirst into comedy. Your watchlist expands to include everything from When Harry Met Sally to Anchorman to old-school screwball comedies. You analyse timing, delivery, the way physical comedy blends with dialogue, the effortless way comedic actors lean into the absurd instead of shying away from it.

Austin? He’s thrilled.

Because suddenly, he gets to turn your living room into an improv class.

“Let’s do a scene.”

You groan, burying your face in a throw pillow. “Austin, please.”

But he’s already standing in front of you, dramatically rolling his shoulders like he’s about to step onto Broadway. “Nope. You want to get better? You gotta practice. Now.” He clears his throat, then delivers the most over-the-top, melodramatic line imaginable:

“I never meant to fall in love with you, Delilah, but the way you butter toast has changed me as a man.”

You deadpan. “Austin. What the hell.”

He points at you. “React. Go.”

You glare at him for a long second.

Then, with the flattest voice possible, you say, “I hope you and the toast will be very happy together.”

Austin collapses onto the floor, clutching his chest like you just delivered the most devastating monologue of all time. “You—you monster.”

You chuck a pillow at him. “This isn’t helping.”

But secretly? You love how much he believes in you.

He gets you out of your head. Helps you stop taking yourself so seriously.

And when you start rehearsing with Paul Rudd, you need every ounce of that confidence.

The first table read goes fine. The second rehearsal? Less fine.

Paul is effortless. Annoyingly effortless. He can take a single line and turn it into comedy gold with the smallest inflection, the tiniest shift in expression. You watch him riff with the other actors, improvising new lines that somehow land even better than what’s on the page, and you feel like you’re watching a masterclass.

And then you step in.

And suddenly, your brain is a void.

You deliver your lines, but they feel stiff. Like you’re trying too hard instead of letting them flow naturally. Next to Paul, you feel sluggish.

By the end of rehearsal, you’re convinced you’ve made a huge mistake.

That night, you flop onto the couch with a groan, burying your face in Austin’s thigh.

He barely looks up from his book. “Rough day?”

You mumble something unintelligible.

Austin sets the book down and pokes your shoulder. “Try again. In English this time.”

You sigh, rolling onto your back so you can look up at him. “Everyone else on set is so funny. I feel like the unfunny kid in a class full of comedians.”

Austin tilts his head, considering you. “You do realise that’s not true, right?”

You scoff. “Austin, I spent an hour watching Paul Rudd improvise lines better than the script itself. Meanwhile, I sounded like a malfunctioning robot trying to keep up.”

Austin shifts, his hand finding yours, his thumb brushing absent circles over your knuckles. “Babe. You don’t have to be the funniest person in the room.”

You exhale slowly, still unconvinced. “Feels like I do.”

Austin shakes his head. “No. You just have to be you in this story. That’s what makes it work. They cast you for a reason. You don’t have to out-joke Paul Rudd—that’s literally his job.”

You bite your lip. “What if I just… don’t have it?”

Austin squeezes your hand. “You do. And the second you stop trying to be ‘funny’ and just be, it’s gonna click.”

You stare at him, searching his face for any trace of doubt. But—of course—there isn’t any.

There never is.

You sigh. “Okay.”

Austin smiles. “Okay?”

“Okay,” you confirm. Then, after a beat—“If I do crash and burn, you have to promise you’ll still love me.”

Austin grins, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Babe, if you bomb, I’ll be first in line to make fun of you for it.”

You groan. “You suck.”

He laughs. “But you love me.”

You roll your eyes but squeeze his hand anyway.

And even though the nerves are still there, somehow—somehow—you feel lighter.

You’re running your lines in your head, hands clenched into fists at your sides as you pace the soundstage floor. The scene you’re about to film is one of the trickiest in the entire movie—fast-paced, rapid-fire dialogue, overlapping lines, physical comedy and emotional stakes all rolled into one.

Basically, it’s a damn minefield.

You love this movie. You love this character. But this scene? This scene is making you reconsider every life decision that led you here.

“Okay, places!” the first AD calls out, snapping you back into reality.

Paul flashes you a reassuring smile from across the set. “You good?”

You inhale deeply, nodding. “Yeah. Just… you know. Hoping I don’t completely humiliate myself.”

He grins. “That’s the goal, though. Comedy is humiliation.”

“That’s comforting,” you deadpan.

The director chuckles from behind the monitor. “Alright, let’s run it.”

You move into position, heart hammering in your chest. The scene is simple enough on the surface—your character and Paul’s are stuck in a ridiculously awkward situation, trying to talk their way out of it, but everything they say just makes it worse.

It should feel easy. Fun.

But all you can think is: Don’t mess up. Don’t kill the momentum. Don’t—

“Action!”

You open your mouth—

And freeze.

Because standing just behind the monitor, half-hidden behind the director’s chair, is Austin.

What the hell—

He catches your eye and grins, that wide, boyish smile of his lighting up his entire face, his cheeks bunching up just slightly, the way they do when he’s genuinely delighted by something.

Your stomach does a full gymnastics routine.

The momentary distraction lasts less than a second, but Paul sees everything. He follows your gaze, spots Austin, and his grin turns downright wicked.

“Ohhh,” Paul drawls, smirking. “This just got interesting.”

You shake yourself out of it, shooting him a warning glare. “Paul.”

“I’m just saying, I feel like I should adjust my performance now,” he teases, loud enough for everyone to hear. “Amp up the charm. Really make you flustered.”

Laughter ripples through the crew.

Austin, still grinning, tilts his head and leans against the nearest set piece, resting his forearm on it like he’s settling in to enjoy the show. “Please. Like you could possibly fluster her.”

You groan. “Can we just do the scene, please?”

The director chuckles. “Rolling! Take two—action!”

You snap into character, locking into the rhythm of the scene.

And this time, it clicks.

The back-and-forth with Paul is effortless—his deadpan delivery bouncing perfectly off your exasperation. The lines flow like second nature, your reactions sharper, your confidence higher. And when the physical comedy beat hits—your character trying to subtly grab an object without breaking eye contact, only to knock over an entire table instead—you nail it.

The set erupts.

“Cut!” the director calls. “That was fantastic.”

Applause breaks out. Paul slaps a hand over his heart like he’s just witnessed a masterpiece. “Ladies and gentlemen, a star is born.”

And then—

From behind the monitor—

Austin laughs, the sound bright and unrestrained, before clapping his hands together.

“Holy shit,” he grins, shaking his head. “You’re good.”

Your face heats instantly. “Shut up.”

“I mean it!” He’s already moving toward you now, closing the distance with that easy stride of his, his hand immediately finding your waist as he leans in slightly, like he just has to touch you. “I knew you could do it, but damn, babe. You belong in this.”

Your instinct is to brush it off, make a joke—Yeah, yeah, tell that to my impostor syndrome—but the way he’s looking at you?

It makes your breath catch.

Because there’s nothing patronising in his praise, no teasing behind his words. Just pure, unfiltered pride.

You duck your head, suddenly feeling exposed. “You’re just being nice.”

Austin’s fingers press just slightly into your waist, grounding you. “Babe. No.” His voice is quieter now, softer, full of something real. “I mean it. You belong in this.”

You exhale shakily, chewing the inside of your cheek.

And maybe—just maybe—you’re finally starting to believe it.

The high from nailing the comedic scene lingers well into the afternoon. Between takes, Austin sticks close, teasing you relentlessly about your “secret talent for slapstick” and how he’s “never letting you live this down.”

You roll your eyes, but deep down, his praise sits warm in your chest.

Still, as the day wears on, the mood on set shifts. The crew moves with a quiet efficiency, the easy laughter from earlier replaced with hushed conversations, a different kind of energy settling in.

Because this next scene?

This is the big one.

The moment where the comedy falls away, peeling back the layers of humour and quick wit until only raw, unguarded emotion remains.

Your character has spent the entire movie cracking jokes, covering every vulnerable moment with deflection, keeping the people around her at arm’s length. But in this scene—the emotional gut-punch of the film’s climax—there’s no more running.

It’s just her, standing in the wreckage of a relationship she’s spent the whole movie pretending didn’t matter. Finally, she breaks.

And suddenly, you feel all of those doubts creeping back in.

Comedy was one thing—it had structure, rhythm, a pace to latch onto. But this? This is the kind of thing that can’t be faked.

It has to hurt.

You shake out your hands, trying to focus, trying to shake the nervous energy building in your chest.

Then you feel it.

A warm, familiar touch at the small of your back.

You turn to find Austin, standing just behind you, his fingers brushing absent circles over your spine, grounding you.

He leans in, voice low. “You okay?”

You swallow, nodding. “Yeah. Just… trying to get out of my head.”

Austin studies you for a second, then exhales softly. His hand slides to your shoulder, squeezing gently. “You don’t have to try to be in it. You’re already there.”

You meet his gaze, searching for something—some kind of reassurance, some kind of anchor. And, like always, he’s steady.

Like he knows you’re about to do something incredible before you even believe it yourself.

“Places!” the first AD calls.

You step into position, heart hammering.

The set falls silent.

“Action.”

At first, your character fights it.

She smiles through the hurt, makes a joke that doesn’t quite land. You feel the moment stretch, the weight of the silence, the tension building in your chest as she realises—maybe for the first time—that she can’t laugh her way out of this one.

Then, the dam breaks.

The words come out softer than you expected, like they’re unraveling her piece by piece.

She admits it.

That she’s scared. That she thought keeping things light, keeping things easy, would stop her from getting hurt. That it wasn’t supposed to matter this much.

And just like that, the scene stops being a scene.

It feels real.

The tears come hot and fast, the kind that shake your whole body, the kind that don’t need any forced technique or conscious effort. You feel the grief in your bones, in your breath, in the way you struggle to hold yourself together and fail completely.

And in that moment, it’s not just a performance.

It’s the best acting you’ve ever done.

“Cut.”

For a moment, no one moves.

No one speaks.

The air on set feels thick, like the weight of what just happened is still settling over the room.

Then, slowly, the spell breaks.

You hear a quiet, shaky exhale from somewhere behind the monitor.

A throat clearing. A muttered “Jesus.”

Then—

One by one, the crew starts reacting.

A few nods, exchanged glances, murmured words between the director and producers. A grip wiping at his face. The script supervisor blinking a little too fast at her notes.

Paul exhales sharply and shakes his head, letting out a low, stunned laugh. “Well, shit.”

The director looks from the monitor to you, then back again, before nodding once. “That… was perfect.”

Your heart is still racing, your body still humming with the ache of the scene, and it takes a second to pull yourself back. You lift a trembling hand, wiping at your damp cheeks with the sleeve of your shirt.

Then you see him.

Austin.

Standing off to the side, hand still covering his mouth, the other braced on his hip like he’s physically recovering from something.

His eyes are red at the edges, like he’s been holding back tears, but the shine is still there, still glassy.

And then—

He drags a hand down his face, sniffing, and lets out the smallest, most overwhelmed laugh as he walks over to you.

You blink, disoriented, still half-trapped in the weight of the scene.

“Did I just make you cry?” you ask, teasing but hoarse from the emotion still clinging to you.

Austin sniffs again, shaking his head. “You just made me cry in front of a whole-ass crew.”

You grin, even as your throat still feels tight. “Damn. This movie must be magic.”

Austin huffs out a laugh, still looking at you like he’s trying to wrap his head around what just happened. Then, without hesitation, he steps forward, cupping your face so gently it makes your chest ache.

His thumbs brush along your damp cheeks, like he can’t decide whether to wipe away the tears or just hold you there, exactly as you are.

“No,” he murmurs, forehead pressing lightly against yours. “It’s you. You’re the magic.”

And just like that—

Everything feels worth it.

By the time you finally make it home, exhaustion has settled deep in your bones—the kind that doesn’t just come from a long day, but from feeling everything so fully that it leaves you spent.

The emotional scene still lingers in your chest, but so does something else—something lighter.

Something like pride.

You can feel it in the way the crew looked at you afterward, the quiet nods of respect from people who’ve seen hundreds of performances but still seemed moved by yours.

You can feel it in the way Paul clapped you on the back, grinning as he told you, “You know, I’d be mad about you making me look bad if I wasn’t so damn impressed.”

But mostly—

Mostly, you can feel it in the way Austin hasn’t let go of you since you walked off set.

Even now, as you sit curled up on the couch in his hoodie and sweatpants—though really, they haven’t been his in a long time.

You claimed them ages ago, stealing them from his suitcase one night when he was away filming. They’d smelled like him, felt like him, and ever since, they’d become your go-to whenever he was gone for too long.

At some point, he stopped pretending he was getting them back.

Now, they’re just yours.

The fabric is soft and worn, the sleeves pulled over your hands as you lean into him, the weight of the day settling into your bones.

A half-eaten takeout container rests between you, forgotten. The TV is on, some mindless show playing in the background, but neither of you are really watching. You’re both worn down, full in a way that has nothing to do with food.

Austin’s fingers trace slow, absentminded circles over the inside of your wrist, like he’s still grounding you, still holding onto the moment.

You watch him for a second—how at ease he looks, how warm, his smile just soft enough to make your heart ache.

And suddenly, the weight of it hits you all at once.

“If you hadn’t pushed me,” you murmur, voice quieter than you meant it to be, “I would’ve turned this down.”

Austin looks over, brow lifting slightly.

You shake your head, swallowing. “I almost said no, Austin. Because I didn’t think I could do it. Because I was scared.” You exhale, fingers tightening around his. “And now? I think this might be my favourite thing I’ve ever done.”

Austin’s expression shifts—something softer, something almost knowing.

Like he’d seen this coming before you ever did.

Like he’d always known you’d get here.

He smiles, bringing your hand to his lips, pressing a slow kiss to your knuckles.

“I never had a doubt.”

Austin doesn’t let go of your hand, even after his words settle in the air between you, warm and certain.

I never had a doubt.

You swallow, something thick and unspoken lodged in your throat. He always says things like that—things that knock the breath out of you, not because they’re unexpected, but because he means them. Every time. Without hesitation.

And tonight?

Tonight, you need him to know how much that means to you.

You shift, carefully moving the takeout container to the coffee table, then turn back to him, watching the way his blue eyes flicker with quiet curiosity as you move.

Then, before you can overthink it, you climb into his lap.

Austin’s hands settle on your hips immediately, like it’s instinct, like he was already waiting for you to be closer. His brows lift slightly, amusement flickering over his features, but there’s something else behind it—something softer, something deeper.

You press your hands to his cheeks, fingertips grazing the slight scruff along his jaw, and he exhales, his eyes fluttering shut for a second like the warmth of your touch just levelled him.

When he opens them again, his gaze is nothing short of devastating.

“Hi,” he murmurs, voice quieter now, like it belongs just to you.

You smile, stroking your thumbs along the ridges of his cheekbones. “Hi.”

His hands flex slightly where they rest against your waist, his touch warm, steady, like he’s grounding himself just as much as you are.

For a second, you just take him in.

The way his hair is still slightly messy from earlier, the way his expression is so open, so unguarded, like he’s letting you see everything he’s feeling without saying a single word.

Like you’re his entire world, and he’s not afraid to show it.

Your throat tightens, and you trail your fingers from his jaw to his temple, then through his hair, combing it back gently.

“I hope you know,” you whisper, voice thick, “how much you mean to me.”

Austin blinks once, his breath catching so softly you almost don’t hear it.

Then, his hands tighten on your waist, just slightly, like he’s bracing himself for the weight of your words.

You shake your head, swallowing. “I know I joke about it—about you being my personal hype man, about how I’d be a disaster without you—”

Austin smirks slightly, but he stays quiet, letting you say what you need to say.

“But, Austin,” you continue, voice dipping lower, “you believing in me—really, truly believing in me—it changes everything.”

His fingers press a little firmer into your waist, his eyes locked onto yours like he’s memorising every word, like he doesn’t want to miss a second of this.

“You make me feel like I can do anything,” you murmur, stroking your fingers through his hair again, watching the way he leans into it, the way his breath stutters just slightly.

Austin swallows, and when he speaks, his voice is barely more than a whisper.

“You can do anything.”

Your chest tightens, a small, breathless laugh slipping past your lips as you shake your head. “You say that like it’s the easiest truth in the world.”

Austin tilts his head slightly, gaze unwavering. “Because it is.”

And God, he means it.

It’s all over his face, in the way his hands slip from your waist to your back, pulling you just that much closer, his thumbs rubbing slow, lazy circles into your skin, like he’s telling you without words that he’s here. That he always will be.

Your breath hitches.

“Say it again,” you whisper, voice barely above a breath.

Austin’s gaze darkens, softens, sharpens all at once.

“You,” he murmurs, lifting a hand to cup your face, his fingers brushing so gently along your jaw that it sends a shiver down your spine, “can do anything.”

A slow exhale slips from your lips, and you don’t realise you’re closing the distance until your forehead is pressed to his, your noses brushing, his breath warm and steady against your lips.

And then—

Austin tilts his head, his lips catching against yours in the softest, slowest kiss imaginable.

It’s not rushed, not desperate—it’s something deeper. Something meant.

Like he’s sealing every word, every promise, into the way he kisses you.

Like this moment, this feeling, this certainty has been waiting to be spoken into existence.

Your fingers slide into his hair as you kiss him back, slow and deliberate, drinking him in, pressing closer until there’s nothing left between you but warmth, but longing, but the quiet, unshakable truth that Austin Butler is the safest place you’ve ever known.

His hands move, one slipping beneath the fabric of your hoodie, resting against the bare skin of your back, pulling you flush against him, his warmth sinking into you like a promise.

And when you finally pull back—foreheads pressed together, breathing uneven, hearts racing in tandem—Austin smiles, thumb tracing slow, absentminded circles against your jaw.

“You always talk about how I believe in you,” he murmurs. But, baby… you don’t even realise what you do for me.”

Your fingers curl against the back of his neck, breath catching in your throat.

“You make me feel like I can breathe,” he continues, voice low, steady. “Like no matter what, I’ll always have a place to land. Like I’m more than enough, just as I am.”

His forehead presses lightly against yours, his breath warm against your lips.

“You make everything make sense,” he whispers. “Even when nothing else does.”

Emotion swells in your chest, too much, too big, and the only thing you can do is kiss him.

Slow, lingering, your hands sliding into his hair, pulling him closer, letting the weight of everything unspoken settle between you.

And when he kisses you back—deep and certain, fingers pressing into your skin like he never wants to let go—you know he feels it too.

[thenightshadowqueen]

Death for a Dollar watchthrough thoughts

Holy shit, this was unhinged. I loved it so much. (That’s too many italics, but I don’t care.) I’m kind of speechless; the number of times I actually covered my mouth in shock (usually because of Sam, but Tom was insane in this one, too) was staggering. I adore this play.

Anyway, I’m going to get into my actual thoughts instead of just rambling.

Just to start, ‘Death for a Dollar’ is a great title, so kudos to whoever came up with that

Oh my god, Hank and Gareth 2.0!!!!

“You don’t know what he did for this place.” “That—Tell me!” This is off to a strong start

“Where was your showmanship?” I love it when they work mini games of Change into the plays

Mr. Twilliger is an incredible name

“This is me being the bartender, getting the stories out of the customers, so they reveal things, and then they want to drink more because they’re reliving their trauma.” I mean, it’s a valid tactic to get more money; yay, capitalism! (sarcasm)

AJ forcing Tom to be musical… Caesar and Juliet, anyone?

I love that Luke knows off the top of his head how many keys a piano has (I’m honestly not surprised)

Is Sam’s hair a little longer than normal? Because it looks really good

“I got three keys, three teeth, three toes. I’ve been through a lot.” I love Tony the piano player (who was also referred to as Bill once)

“My mind can take an awful lot; there’s not a lot in there” I love him, actually

“You ain’t trying to seduce him!” “But I get bigger tips when I do!” Sam

Can I just thank whoever edited this for giving us that little shot of Tom laughing? Because I love it when we get to see him actually laugh.

I love Mrs. Prostitute (and I love Tom for including positive representation of sex work)

“This is what feminism looks like” West End Big Boys flashbacks

“My mum is crazy” SAM

Also I think my favourite thing about the microphones is that we can hear them laughing so much more clearly (brought to you by Luke, on this occasion)

I adore Sam’s weird little harmonica thing he does in western-genre pieces

Ooh, younger versions of characters being played by different actors; I don’t think we’ve seen that before

I love Sam being confused and Tom’s response being to start clapping

I love Sam being annoyed and retaliating at AJ with a bald joke

“I told my daddy that I was real fast with a pistol, and that maybe I could go and work in law enforcement, but he wouldn’t have it.” “No! No son is going to go work for the government!” AJ trying to paint his father as the villain and Sam trying his very best to make the audience like him… This is gorgeous

“Telling a man if he’s allowed to own people or not” okay, never mind, I take that back

I don’t know why Sam picked the Watson-clown voice, but I’m glad he did (also I love that the voice made Luke break)

“Many Fingers Pussy” Jesus Christ, Tom

“They thought I had the devil in me” god damn it, now I feel bad for Bill

Sam is so good at playing wide-eyed innocent characters

“God, I wish they had that law in America in the modern day” I wish I had enough faith in people’s judgement to wish that

“I didn’t know you could do magic” I love it when Sam causes trouble

I can never see a reference to a one-man band like that and not think of Mary Poppins

“I can’t wait to hear those four white boys do those accents” oh dear

Luke speaking Spanish!!!

You know what, that vaguely Mexican accent could have been a hell of a lot worse, so well done, Sam

“So you can work on a farm, or you can jerk people off” oh my god, Sam

“He offered me a job” and then AJ realising what it sounded like and walking it way back

Tom entering the scene and waiting for a moment to join in and then Sam just throwing him in without warning is amazing

“I work here jerking people off” Tom

“She said she helps people el secrete-o” SAM

“Hand stuff Jesus is okay with” Sam

I don’t know why the fact that Tom knows little bits of Spanish brings me so much joy, but it does

Holy shit, Luke speaking Spanish with an American accent might be my new favourite thing

I love Maria, the bank robber/prostitute

You know what, I get Bill; the little, slightly mosquitoy “yeah”s are alluring

Half-kiss!!!

“A beautiful flower turns to a crooked leaf” I fucking adore AJ’s weird little sayings

“It’s a well-known expression” and then the advert with the merch saying ‘more well-known expressions’

“Something went worse than wrong. It went really wrong.” Gorgeous.

Sam’s slip oh my god

I know I already said Sam’s hair looks good, but Sam’s hair looks really good

I already said it but I will never be over Luke’s Spanish-in-an-American-accent. Never.

“I’ll keep my hands moist for you” it seems like Tom like using the word moist (the moisturiser fairy comes to mind)

I love audience participation

I’m sorry, as someone who struggles with mental math, that quick multiplication from Luke was impressive

“Got a lot of spunk in you, have you?” I love Tom using his English degree to make dirty jokes (obviously this doesn’t require an English degree; I just mean that it’s a wordplay joke)

I love Sam making sure to bring the story full-circle, with Tony losing his teeth and toes

Jesus, Tom

“Have we invented the electric chair yet?” I looked it up, and it looks like it was invented in the 1880’s, so not quite, but it wasn’t nearly so far off as I thought it might be

“I’ma travelling electric chair salesman” … honestly, I’m not even surprised at this point

Tom is right; this is really dark

I don’t think Sam knows how electric chairs work (affectionate)

Okay who the fuck let Sam wink like that

“Well, I guess that’s the end of the Shoot from the Hip show” I love when they get meta

“What could go wrong with giving a southern American teenager a pair of guns? I’ve got school tomorrow!” Holy fucking shit; may I present Sam Russell, the king of risky jokes

“…when we faked my death…” I love Tom so much

“I think this is the first time we’ve used the principle of the unreliable narrator” I actually love this so much; this is such a cool concept, especially for an improv show

Tom is unhinged in this one and I love it

I love this so much

I already made as post saying this, but it bears repeating: this is BUS levels of insane

[mazzystar24]

Breaks my heart how evil they are to them. I know they're grown men and can handle it and all but they shouldn't have to! Oliver has been so respectful and put so much care into playing buck. He's always been honest about this story being about BUCK, not tommy, and that nobody should be ringing wedding bells

The fact that even the 911 account isn't posting anything because bt fans flood things with hate... and we know oliver sees this shit, he even shut down his comments and DMs. It makes me so fucking sad. We're so close to exploring this beautiful story we've been waiting for and they ruin it over someone who was hired for 4 episodes??

No same the level of care and respect that Oliver has had has been unreal

I say this as a bisexual

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a presumably straight actor handle a queer storyline with this level of respect and understanding

And unlike their fav he hasn’t done it for fame or money or popularity

He has stood up for buck and buck’s bisexuality in cases he didn’t have to

He didn’t have to correct that reporter he didn’t have to make statements in his Instagram calling out bigots he didn’t have to show all this love understanding and excitement for bucks bi arc but he did it even when it’s put him in the firing line and he’s done it with words so well crafted you can tell he fully understands his character and also what bisexuality means to his character

Ik I make jokes but I’m not saying this in a parasocial way- truth is we never know what these actors or famous people are really like- but we still have to recognise good behaviour and the way he has handled this storyline does not elicit the hate and claims of biphobia against him in the least and it’s honestly sad that he has done everything right and is still receiving this from assholes who genuinely do not care or understand what biphobia is

Just because they can’t distinct what the story has been telling them AT EVERY FUCKING TURN and how Oliver tried over and over not to get their hopes up AT EVERY FUCKING TURN and what they built up in their head sometimes with the help of a man after their money. It’s ridiculous

Like not only did he have to turn off comments and DMs he also made a response apparently and probably second guessed himself and deleted it:

And everything he said both here and the interview I stand by, good bi rep doesn’t have to be only fucking if they’re your committed partner y’all are over correcting

Also the claims of biphobia - y’all learn nothing about not assuming sexualities or making these claims huh?

Well at least they’re consistent- when threatened they pretend anything and everything is somehow homophobia cos I (a bisexual ) have been called homophobic so many times by bt fans it’s insane

Rant over cos this is super long but they better leave Oliver stark alone cos that man genuinely doesn’t deserve this shite

[justisabellethings]

Can I just take a moment to talk about the wild transformation Barry Keoghan has had this year (by that I mean like 2023 and 2024 so far)?

In the space of a few months, this man went from being a slept-on actor who was being cut from superhero blockbusters — someone who doesn’t watch award shows or film festivals might have called him a “nobody” despite being an Oscar nominee in several big movies — to this impish, heavily sexualized, and somewhat overexposed (or perhaps overexposed to the point of full on excess) viral pop culture phenomenon.

I mean that quite literally.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a public image transformation like this. A metamorphosis really. Especially for a dude. It’s shocking. It’s brilliant.

You usually see people like Britney Spears or Miley Cyrus do the whole “transition into something more mature” thing to further their careers, but I’ve never seen a man do quite the same thing until now (in my lifetime, at least.) With the same degree of objectification and sexualisation a woman.

Like he’s not just unbuttoning his shirt and posing in jeans or Calvin Klein underwear like other leading men tend to do, he’s fully nude, in latex aprons, latex gloves, false nails and pearl necklaces. He’s covered in blood, lipstick, cummy bath water, god knows what else.

He goes there. Unflinchingly.

Like he’s almost sexually degraded. Degraded in ways men usually aren’t in Hollywood.

(I freaking love Saltburn, I guess I’m not exclusively referring to that, more so his exposure in the media.)

Crazy part is he’s a fantastic actor who doesn’t even have to go there. But he still goes there. And honestly I do hope he does keep working with Emerald. He could be a good muse for her. Assuming he’s going there of his own free will and he’s owning this sexuality that’s been latent inside of him his whole life, good for him.

But this will change his public image and persona forever from now on. He can totally embrace the sex symbol thing if he chooses to, but that can overshadow some actors as it has been known to do that in the past. He has openly idolized bisexual male sex symbols of Old Hollywood, after all.

I just wonder if he can channel all of this and continue being taken seriously as an actor and not become known only for this.

I know he probably needed to do this to become a lead actor and not just a character actor (I’d say the role of Oliver Quick blends both and required both), but I guess we’ll just have to see where all of this goes in time.

Still, you can watch videos of him from years ago and you will still see him, but at the same time it’s like day and night. It’s just very overwhelming.

Anyways I just wanted to get that off my chest.

[firstkanaphans]

what are your takes on the wrong judgement of kant's character by most ppl?

By “wrong judgment,” I’m assuming you mean people saying that Kant is faking his love for Bison and/or working with the police for fun rather than because his brother’s life has been threatened. I’m not really sure I have a “take” on it except that those people very clearly aren’t watching the show because those issues have been addressed overtly in the script several times. Some people even admit they’re skipping KantBison scenes and yet still have the audacity to get mad when they don’t understand stuff.

I will say, however, that Jojo isn’t doing himself any favors and I think a lot of the discontent with Kant’s character is due to poor writing. Some people are never going to like morally gray characters at baseline—in which case they probably shouldn’t be watching shows about assassins—but characterization is also something Jojo has always struggled with. His tolerance for messy characters is superhuman and he expects everyone else to have the same tolerance as him, which is unreasonable. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen Friendzone, but it’s just 2 straight seasons of the worst people you’ve ever met fighting with each other and it is not a good time. Only Friends was slightly better and I think THK is actually his best offering yet as far as characterization goes.

My favorite book on writing is called “Save the Cat” by Blake Snyder and it posits that the most important rule of writing is that your main character has to be likeable. They don’t have to be good, but the audience has to like them. All of these issues with Kant’s characterization could have been fixed by simply adding an extra scene or two to flesh out Kant and Babe’s relationship so that you can actually see the reality of the decision he’s struggling with.

This is possibly the meanest thing I’ve ever said on this site and I feel horrible for it, but my guess is that they tried to do that and just weren’t able to salvage the takes because Babe’s actor is…learning. I think that’s probably why they brought in a second actor to play his “friend” in the scene at the school rather than just using Babe himself because I get the feeling they’re rushing that poor boy out of scenes as quickly as possible. But even what they do show of Kant and Babe’s relationship isn’t helping Kant’s case. Bison interacts with Babe more than Kant does. Bison is the one that points out his bruises. Bison is the one who asks about his interests.

All of this to say that although I think a lot of the criticism against Kant is unfounded, I also think this is a problem that easily could have been fixed with just a few tweaks. I also think that people are fickle and we’ll likely see them come back around to Kant during the second half of the season. The audience is essentially mimicking Bison’s emotions, so this week they’ll get their revenge and then the healing can begin. Anyone still being willfully obtuse after Kant and Bison themselves work out their issues is likely not watching the show in good faith and therefore their opinions don’t matter.

[dangermousie]

2023 End of Year Post - cdrama edition

Yes, we have a lot of December left, but I don't think anything else I want to check out will air before 2024 hits (it's cdrama so caveat is - you never know.)

This is only going to cover cdramas that aired in 2023; if I watched it but it was made in a different year, it's not on the list. This was a pretty good cdrama year, all in all.

DRAMAS WATCHED

(In order of liking from least to most as opposed to pure quality; I am including if I’ve seen enough to make up my mind; yes I realize that’s inaccurate, but that’s my list)

30 legend of twin flower - Not dignifying that drama with capital letters, as the only capital that should be associated with this is capital punishment - which is what watching this feels like.

29 Dominator of Martial Gods - sounds like a bdsm gay porn title. Would probably be better acted and written if it was.

28 Beauty of Resilience - you'd need a lot of said resilience to sit through this incoherent, barely acted mess. The thing that I remember the most other than my annoyance is all the jingly-jangly head gear on JJY. Perhaps they could have sold some of them and spent the money on a better script.

27 Divine Destiny - if you think you have too many brain cells and want to get rid of some, boy do I have a drama for you!

26 Wanru’s Journey - honestly it's probably tied with SEL - I mean it's worse but it has actors who are nowhere as well known and a fraction of SEL's budget. Still, this is a big fat nope. I will not say what I think of Aoi Rupeng's "acting" or I'd have to put money in the curse jar.

25 Snow Eagle Lord - Gulinazha's stone face, nonsense plot, terrible CGI. Take your pick as to why this is terrible.

24 Scent of Time - it was uneven but fun but then that ending was dumb enough to destroy the whole thing. Show me on the doll where common sense hurt you, makers!

23 Royal Rumors - Jeremy Tsui and Meng Ziyi are utterly wasted in this nothing trifle of a drama.

22 Legend of Anle - I had high expectations but alas. This is the drama version of color beige. There is nothing offensive about it but nothing good either. Mediocre actors are mediocre, good actors become mediocre, this is just a waste of our finite time on planet earth.

21 Romance on the Farm - it's not you, it's me in action. I can see why people would like this wholesome slice of farming family life, but it's tailored to trigger every one of my "nope" opinions.

20 Back from the Brink - if I were 12, it would be my favorite thing. I am not 12.

19 Journey of Chong Zi - objectively a terrible drama with plot holes the size of Mars and a leading lady whose face has apparently frozen when the wind changed. But I am a total sucker for the trope of upright shizun falling for his demonic disciple and going mental so here we are. Objectively, garbage, subjectively my precious!

18 Love you Seven Times - just call poor Ding Yuxi "Atlas," he carried this mess so hard.

17 Blooming Days - trashy dogblood harem fight fun throwback. It's not that great (and the fact that it was shredded doesn't help) but it's probably the last gasp of that genre for the foreseeable future, so I am grading on a curve.

16 The Starry Love - a fun fantasy where the secondary OTP stole the thunder but overall a really solid fantasy xianxia romance.

15 The Longest Promise - it could have been better - the secondaries were unbearable and there was too much of them and what they did with Alen Fang's character still gives me rage fits, but the main couple was impeccable and lovely and I rooted so hard for them.

14 Chang Feng Du/Destined - visually gorgeous, solidly acted, impeccable first half. Bland as hell second half. Win some, lose some.

13 Circle of Love - this drama is a nonsense trash heap on fire. After a typhoon hit it. It was also the most entertaining, addicting drama on this whole list.

12 Hidden Love - the sole modern on this list, this story has barely any plot but it made me care about the young, decent lovers so hard.

11 Choice Husband - starts out wacky, continues with angst and blood and happy ending. I loved it, but I've always had a soft spot for melo and schemers turning devoted.

10 Pledge of Allegiance - bromance, super solid acting, visuals, a really dark take on officials and the world. Insanely underrated.

9 Provoke - a truly fun Republican revenge and love tale, showing that short format can be wonderful.

8 Gone with the Rain - some of the secondary characters are rage-inducing (hi there, cardboard boy!) but the scheming, ruthless, vulgar FL is amazing and her slowburn with her age gap general who is delighted by her out-there-ness is great!

7 Wonderland of Love - Fei Wo Si Cun goes wholesome and the result is surprisingly entertaining. Battle couple, glorious visuals, a fast paced plot. It's the first Xu Kai drama I enjoyed in years (and he plays a rare cdrama ML it would be pretty neat to pair up with in rl.)

6 My Journey to You - that ending is infuriating (and I am OK with open endings if done properly) but what a visual feast, probably the most gloriously shot drama on this list, and that's a tough competition. Also it packs a hell of a lot of couples and familial and adversarial relationships into its slim running time; assassin lady won over by a gentle man is my favorite trope and so this is extra great.

5. Till the End of the Moon - the ending is a rage-inducing disaster for me, but this drama was the most incredibly emotionally intense, visually eye popping experience. It was deeply flawed but when it was amazing, it was like nothing else in its visuals, its characters and its narratives. It took insane risks; some paid off and some did not, but it was glorious.

4. Story of Kunning Palace - I don't often care for reverse harem stories but this one was such fun - the main OTP was glorious (strong FL, unhinged ML) but honestly everything about this was just so excellently done.

3. The Ingenious One - the most adult drama on this list. Smart protagonists, intelligent plot, emotions that felt true, this is a revenge and a mystery and found family and goes into so many directions you do not expect (Su Mengyu's PTSD after his first kill - that is something you never see in dramas, definitely not prolonged and profound - not like this.) If I was to say which drama was objectively the best on this list, as opposed to favorite, it would be this.

1 (tie) Lost You Forever 1 - this is an exquisite emotional jewel of a story about damaged people moving forward, with damage always present - their past informs their present and always will. The narrative about Xiao Yao and three very different men in her life makes me think that it's an equivalent of a neutron bomb going off right before the main narrative starts and now we are watching the survivors wander in the wreckage. This is very high fantasy setting but it's one of the most emotionally human narratives out there.

1 A Journey to Love - everything I ever wanted - assassins, ride or die adult OTP with genuine believable conflicts, great and complex secondaries, beautiful fights. Oh, and yeah Liu Shi Shi domming the hell out of every man in a ten mile radius, as she should.

FAVORITE DRAMA

It's a tie between Lost You Forever Part 1 and A Journey to Love. LYF1 is a bona fide art piece but it's only part 1 and who knows if part 2 will be any good (seeing the huge ep number cut, I have my doubts) and so it's incomplete. AJTL is an old school wuxia romance with incredibly competent, adult people in love and great cast of secondaries. I can't pick.

WORST DRAMA

romance of twin flower - this is a drama that should not exist. If I could hex everyone involved with it, I would. It's a terrible, stupid, shrill, badly acted drama to start with, but where it really is catapulted into stratosphere of horror is that is took my very favorite non-danmei web novel of all time, a smart and complicated tale with incredible protagonists and turned it into that barftastic abomination. Peng Xiao Ran kept making horrible drama after horrible drama but I kept giving her a chance because of Goodbye My Princess but after this disaster, I've had to accept GMP was a fluke and she is on my "if she's in it, I am out” list. Ding Yuxi is not that far yet (his performance in Seven Lifetimes was the one thing carrying that mess afloat) but he's on freaking thin ice. Anyway, I like to pretend this drama does not exist.

FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER

It was hard because there were so many I loved this year - Deng Wei's traumatized, gentle Seventeen from LYF1 (if someone told me I'd swoon and weep for a character played by Deng Wei, I'd have told them to examine their brains asap), Liu Yuning's incredibly capable, deadly, contained Ning Yuanzhou from AJTL, Zhang Linghe's unhinged Xie Wei from SoKP, Chen Xiao's schemer with a heart Yun Xiang from TIO.

But ultimately, it couldn't be anyone else but Luo Yunxi as Tantai Jin/Demon God/Ming Ye/Cang Jiumin in Till the End of the Moon. He was everything - a demon, a saint, a martyr, a monster, a tormented abuse victim, a savior, joyful, unhinged, smart, pitiable. It was the cdrama performance of the year for me. Luo Yunxi even in a mediocre role is impressive but in a complex (series of) role(s) designed for his strengths, he is a force of nature.

FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER

Xiao Yao (Lost You Forever Part 1). Once again, there were runner ups - Bai Lu's smart a little evil FL in Kunning, the gloriously unhinged assassin domme Liu Shi Shi in AJTL, Esther Yu's assassin longing for a different life in MJTY etc etc etc. But Xiao Yao's damaged, difficult, very self-aware woman stole my heart. I was skeptical going in because I haven't enjoyed a Yang Zi performance in a long time, but she was the wounded beating soul of this incredible drama.

NEEDS TO BE MURDERED

Where do we start? How about all of Seventeen's (LYF1) monster family? His brother, who tortured him for years physically and emotionally to such a degree his body is a horror map and his personality is permanently altered because "mommy liked you better." Psycho mother who created a situation where the kids were going to turn on each other and "let's get my grandson raped" grandma. Where is a well-placed meteorite when you need one.

FAVORITE SHIP

Xiao Yao/Seventeen, LYF1. Yes, a ship of characters played by Yang Zi and Deng Wei is my favorite. Leave me alone, I am on my tenth helping of crow already. They are both incredibly damaged, barely functioning survivors who find what they need in the other - he finds a savior and someone who sees him as a man and rebuilds himself around her and she finds someone who will always put her first and only, and subsume himself in her. Is it healthy? No. Does it make sense for them and is it making them slowly functional? Yes.

Runner up: Ren Ruyi/Ning Yuanzhou, AJTL - two adults, so competent, so chemistry full. She has so much damage and so little normalcy but is so strong and he is oddly gentle (in between murders) and incredibly self-reflective. They are each other's mirrors and I love them.

FAVORITE SECONDARY OTP

Su Mingyu/Ke Menglan, The Ingenious One - the idealistic merchant who wants to join jianghu until he sees its horrors firsthand and a slave entertainer who wants security but decides she wants him more. They are gorgeous and glorious and wholesome and I adore them.

Runner up: Liu Gong Quan/Ming Zhu, The Ingenious One - that drama was a shippy gift, especially impressive considering it wasn't even romance-centric. He's the officer who has to bring down her treasonous father but loves her. Delicious.

Another runner up is Chao Feng/Qian Kui, the angelic good girl and the scheming bad boy in The Starry Love. They stole the drama from the main OTP for me.

NOTP

Scent of Time endgame. What the hell was even that. It made NO sense.

FAVORITE SCENE

So many good scenes this year - Tantai Jin taking apart Li Susu in prison in TTEOTM, the OTP fighting in perfect sync and insane rhythm in the gorge battle in AJTL, Chen Ruoxuan's character stopping the execution in Pledge, Yan Lin's coming of age in Kunning, the poison/antidote "gamble" in MJTY, Cang Xuan detoxing in LYF1. But I think ultimately, me being who I am, my favorite scene is Xiao Yao kissing Seventeen's damaged, scarred knee to show he is in no way inferior for her. AAAAA!

In terms of pure jaw dropping visuals tho nothing will ever beat Ming Ye’s battle against the Devil God in TTEOTM.

BIGGEST CRUSH

Ning Yuanzhou, AJTL. He's sexy as hell (that height, that way he moves in battle) but he's also so incredibly competent, so adult, so self-reflective and so attracted to a woman for her strength. He also gets whumped on the reg. Anyway, my hormones are ready.

BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER

Gong Yuanzhi (My Journey to You) - I loved the unhinged, brocon poison boy. He was everything. Also Yan Lin (Kunning) - talk about sunshine; I totally got why all these people felt they needed to save him.

NEEDS A SEQUEL

My Journey to You - what the HELL was that ending?

NEEDS SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT

legend of twin flower - that is, stab it with scissors like it stabbed the novel until it's dead.

TOO MANY SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT

Till the End of the Moon - they clearly cut stuff to fit into the new regs about runtime and it made the last 1/5 rather abrupt. Gimme!

TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE

The emperor cannot be irredeemable. WTF, China, you are a communist country!

FAVORITE TROPE WE’VE SEEN A LOT OF

This is the year of a ML who yearns to be dommed by his FL. Long may it continue.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT

The Legend of Anle - the novel had a great plot, the cast were all actors I either enjoy a lot or somewhat and we got - whatever that soggy piece of wonderbread toast was.

BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE

LYF1 - I only checked out to mock because nobody could explain the story to me and nobody in the cast did anything I like either ever or in years. And then I fell utterly and completely in love and had to eat so much delicious crow.

2023 DRAMAS I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT I MOST WANT TO WATCH

Ancient Love Song is the only one on that list. It looks really good, I just need to brace myself.

BEST NON-2023 DRAMA I’VE WATCHED IN 2023

The Imperial Doctoress - best slowburn and pining and glorious character development and adult leads.

MOST ANTICIPATED

Anticipating any nonaired cdrama is a mug's game but if they air, I will definitely check out all the Fox Matchmaker dramas, LYF2, JoL2 and The Last Immortal. If Prisoner of Beauty ever is allowed out of the vault (dubious), it goes on the list too.

[itmeansseizetheday]

Film analysis.

Dead poets society; the banners.

I want to touch into the aspect of the banners, the most common one spoken about I’ve noticed is Cameron, however so far I’ve not seen one speaking about Neil.

Neil is holding the banner of excellence.

As for everyone who has seen the film, they will know that Neil exceeded in everything he possibly can. He is the straight-A student. He is the ‘golden’ student academic wise, aside from Meeks. He attended summer school. He is smart, he is passing everything to please his father.

Neil’s father pushes Neil for excellence but only out of a selfish need for Neil to succeed so they’ll have more money in the future. Neil attempts at first to give his father excellence. Two examples being; Dropping the annual and the summer school. He did everything to please his father.

Nu: “I heard you did

summer school…”

Ni: “chemistry, my

father thought I should

get ahead”

Even being an excellent student in the way of academics, Neil was excellent in a way towards his friends. He made sure Todd was included, he gave Todd a safe person to go to. He made sure he felt safe due to the anxiety he possessed. He went out of his limits to keep Todd close, and to show he cared. An example, when Todd is doing ‘sweaty tooth mad man’ in front of whole class. The cut to Neil where he is just staring with a sense of ‘aw’, the viewer could tell how proud Neil was of Todd for doing that.

However, Neil can’t fill out excellence in the one thing he is actually excellent at, which is acting. If you seen dead poets society you’ll know Neil’s love of acting is phenomenal. He is a great actor, he plays the role perfectly well. It’s an huge part of Neil’s character. However, it’s the one thing Neil’s father doesn’t want him to be excellent in. His father strips Neil of the one thing he knows he can do well.

We know Neil does excellence in the acting and his friendships better then the excellence in pleasing his father due to the ending of the film.

Neil’s acting, when he was on that stage everyone looked at him with Awe. With proudness, with happiness. He had done the one thing his father disagreed on put his whole heart into it. Neil’s ‘good, he’s really good’ at acting, and all his hard work really pays off.

Alongside, when it comes to Neil’s death we see the aspect of how his excellency has effected his friends. Due to how good of a friend Neil is, especially towards Todd, we see the impact he has left in the scene of the snow. Neil is stood outside, in disbelief of Neil’s death. He knew, Todd knew Neil would never do this by himself. Even though Todd did physically do it, it was all due to the fact of his father’s behaviour towards him. When he finds out Neil is dead he throws up, screaming into the snow with pain filling his lungs.

Nu: ‘leave him..’

T: ‘NEEIIIILLLLLLLLL.’

I love this little inside of Neil holding the excellence Banner. He is an excellent character, with excellent belief and an excellent personality.

Neil holding the excellence banner is the correct introduction towards the rest of the film. If I had to narrow it down to what he was absolutely the most excellent in, I’d have to choose Friendship or acting.

Neil was an excellent

character.

If you have read this far, thank you so much! I appreciate your time and support on this film analysis! I enjoyed writing this one and I’m planning on writing more dead poets analysis in the future! I hope you enjoyed this and I’d love to hear everyone’s opinions and views on this topic of Neil and his banner!

Originally posted in: https://www.tumblr.com/communities/dying-poets-society