#he just texted he misses me too
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just sitting in bed in actual tears, about 15 minutes after boy left for work, thinkin about how lucky i am and how i miss him already
#and u know what#he just texted he misses me too#diary#wow#gross#gna go JO about him now!! byeeee#(scrolls for an hr anyway)#i'm 31 can u tell by this post?
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Ride 793: The palms of their hands
Pag 1
1: Holding hands with you rival
Pag 2
1: Grasping tightly the gratitude
They're moving forward... to the future!!
Pag 3
1: 1500m left until the mountain line!!
Pag 4
2: You're kidding....
He's coming....?
He's getting closer?
3: So odd, and yet I thought I had left him behind completely
This is “three times”, isn't it?
5: He's coming
And moreover
Pag 5
1: He's doing it while singing!!
Even though Hakogaku's Manami had left him so much behind in a moment...
Mountain King is getting closer!!
He's not giving up!!
The distance is closing!!
That's right ♪ I know ♪ If you do this ♪
Pag 6
1: The princess' wish ♪
2: Will come true ♪
3: Mountain King is amazing!! He's humming a tune!!
I heard of this, Mountain King becomes faster when he hums a tune!!
What, amazing!
The magic singing!!
I'll try singing too next time I'll climb!
4: No
It's not magic
5: For you, that “song”
Pag 7
1: it's a device to activate your power!!
2: Like a car's key
3: To carry people and luggage up a mountain road a vehicle needs both a sturdy body, small parts
4: and a powerful engine
5: For bikes, the “body”
Pag 8
1: Practice, repetition, recovery, determination, challenges- everything
2: piles up!!
3: Only someone who has worked
4: tirelessly, without rest....
Pag 9
1: Could get to this position of the mountain stage on the Inter High's first day!!
2: And he can even keep up with my “three times”!!
4: I see, so that's what it means
You piled everything up during this past year...
Pag 10
1: Ouch
2: Ah, damn, I pressed something weird
Ah....
3: Oh, I have a message
Ah, it's from Sakamichi-kun
Ah... it's from three months ago..
Hehehe, ops
4: What is it, what is it...? “Do you remember? The promise we made on the last day?”
Oh... I remember
“We said 'let's race for the mountain stage on the first day next time'”
Ah.. we did, we did
6: “Are we still on for that?”
8: “Of course”
Pag 11
1: To protect your promise with me!!
Wait, Manami-kun!!
Princess ♪...!!
2: Sakamichi-kun!!
3: Manami-kun!!
Pag 12
1: Mountain King caught up!!
He caught Hakogaku's Manami, who had attacked and opened the gap!!
2: He's not surrendering!!
Neither of them is surrendering!!
1200m left until the mountain line!!
Pag 13
1: Now another race...
2: starts!!
4: They're both taking the curve
5: while colliding against each other!!
Pag 14
1: Aaaaaa
Soooreeee
I won't surrender!!
2: They're still neck and neck!!
3: Amazing!
Pag 15
1: From the inner side!!
2: Sooreeee
Manami fell back for a moment and then forced his way forward!!
They hit each other!!
5: The trees are getting lower again
6: One more time...
Pag 16
1: Let's go, “three times”!!
Pag 17
2: Manami used the wind and accelerated again!!
Incredible, what's that!
3: What about Mountain King!?
Pag 18
1: Musical note shaped wings!?
Pag 19
1: Aaaaaaaa
2: Amazing
3: It's just like you
4: You were so desperate to catch me that you unconsciously used the wind to accelerate
5: Interesting!!
Pag 20
1: Mountain King is clinging to him!! I thought Manami had attacked but
Manami didn't get away!!
He caught up with such a weird acceleration!?
Amazing!
2: Maybe your singing is something more than a key
3: Ahhhh
5: These past three years have been fun
Huh!?
Pag 21
1: I'm glad you were here for the past three years
3: Huh... ah!!
4: Thank you
Pag 22
2: Such a close battle like this, such a once-in-a-lifetime battle like this, it could only have been with you
3: Yeah... yeah!!
“The past three years”....!!
4: No, that, I should be the one saying that, really!!
5: That's right... this is my match against Manami-kun...
Pag 23
1: Let's go until the mountain line
2: Let's give everything we have
3: Let's make the most of every second of the time we have left!!
5: 1km until the end....
Pag 24
1: It's the final climb!!
Pag 25
1: Yeah!!
Pag 26
3: Th-thank god I made it in time...
This... I couldn't miss this today
4: Sangaku said that
5: “It will be the culmination of the past three years”
#yowamushi pedal#yowapeda#yowamushi pedal translations#yowapeda manga#yowamushi pedal spoilers#yowamushi pedal manga#ride 793#no im not crying i just have 793 chapter of yowapeda in my eyes ;A;#watanabe please stop reminding me that this manga is gonna end!!! I dont wanna hear it!!#and neither does onoda!! Look at his desperate face when he realizes that that's his last race against manami!!!#excuse meeee ;A; i cant do this#so imma focus on the nice things#like onoda sining that 'the princess' wish comes true' right when he sees manami#bc THATS HIS WISH MANAMI IS HIS WISH AND ITS FINALLY COME TRUE#or how cute Manami is in the flashback page and the way he jumps up to reply to onoda#like the only thing missing there was him adding 'it's a date' to that text#bc thats what it is okay its obvious#honestly i understand why onoda is so scared that this is his last chance with manami#given that he had to wait 3 months for a single text lmao#he's scared he wont hear from manami at all once they wont be able to meet at the ih - and he's right#manami please reply to your phone onoda needs you#im babbling to not focus on the last pages bc theyre making me too emotional and I CANNOT HANDLE THIS#if i think about this manga ending imma melt in a puddle of tears okay#so ill just focus on sansaka being canon for now :')
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just a few javieran horse headcanons because i like them a normal amount
branwen
- tall AND fat. kieran makes sure he’s always fed (maybe even accidentally a teensy bit overfed. just because kieran can’t help but indulge him when he butts him with his head or nuzzles at his pockets when he knows there’s treats in there. but never too much because ‘obesity is a problem, even in animals !’). probably about 17hh, taller than average for a kentucky saddler but nothing too big. especially since kieran himself is quite tall
- VERY well-tempered, both naturally, as well as because kieran has literally made him bulletproof. bagged him, blanketed him, stood, jumped, backflipped onto and off of him. this kindly gentleman of a horse only spooks when he wants to be bratty specifically.
- i think he’s about 6 or so, came from the stables kieran worked at after being orphaned, he was just a colt when kieran was just a kid. kieran learned how to birth foals quickly, and branwen happened to be one of them. with the way that they fell in love with each other and the way that branwen whinnied and pranced up to the fence when kieran came back to buy him after the army didn’t work out, you’d think that horse was born just for him.
- his favourite treats, in order, are rutabaga (kieran’s secret for branwen’s glossy coat. also why he’s kinda fat.), boiled potatoes mixed into his oats, apples, and fresh greens. he’s simultaneously incredibly easy to please because of the simplicity of the latter parts of his favourites list and also very needy and complicated because kieran so loves to make his pony happy with his absolute favourite treats, so he tries his very best to get branwen’s eccentric tastes pleased once falling into the VDL’s.
- i always say “a horse’s favourite thing to do is hurt itself”, and i think this statement holds relatively true for branwen as well, though there’s a 25% chance that he’s actually hurt, a 50% chance that he’s only mildly injured or spooked and he’s playing it up to get kieran to dote on him, and a 25% chance that he will protect kieran with his life when they’re in a dire situation (see: snake on the ground or gunfire nearby. or even god forbid a spare tumbleweed find it’s way rolling nearby.) despite kieran’s last wish being his horse getting injured. branwen thinks that he’s gotta be The Man and protect his dad sometimes. it does not help in any situation ever whatsoever.
- branwen is the PERFECT companion for a trail riding date. he’s settled, calm, has a great gait, and as a gelding, truly is not worried about other horses being “faster” than him, so he never gets rowdy nor has any problems when partner riders/horses crowd him. kieran is allowed to ask for as many kisses as he pleases because branwen will never jump when javier’s gold-tipped boots poke him in the side and boaz irritatedly flicks his flank with his tail. truly a goated wingman. also never complains about long rides, and enjoys being out of camp with his rider for as much as physically possible for both of them, so he’s never barnsour in either direction.
boaz
- as an american paint, he’s naturally short and stocky. saddle ends up being a bit loose, though, as javier isn’t as dedicated to keeping him perfectly fed or groomed. he loves him, sure, but horses are somewhat of tools to him, so he kinda does slightly more than bare minimum to keep him kempt and healthy. around 14.5hh, slightly shorter than average and quite dense with muscle
- temperamentally a bit volatile. this horse has just as much drama as his rider, if not a little more. doesn’t like something ? ridden too long ? that stick looks too much like a snake ? hasn’t spent enough time with kieran that day ? he will snort and grunt and bunny hop if javi isn’t on him, and shudder hard enough the saddle shakes underneath him if he is. boaz likes to please his rider, but he also demands pleasure himself, and has no issue with “accidentally” placing a hoof on his owners nice, intentionally clean boots, and subsequently slowly leaning more and more of his weight onto it when he doesn’t immediately get what he wants. bratty pony. generally, he keeps javier safe, though, when it comes down to it.
- around 5 years old. after dutch found javier trying to steal chickens the first time they met, he soon took him back to that ranch and their first take as gang leader and member was a 1 year old grey paint colt for javi to train and subsequently ride. until he was rideable, javier rode a morgan that was formerly hosea��s, named carolina, while he lead boaz everywhere behind him.
- favourite treats, in order, are corn cobs (especially dried), prickly pear fruit AND cactus, sugar cubes, and sliced apples. will force javier to share his maiz with him. javier has always sliced his apples up since he was a colt, not only because javi simply finds comfort in toying with his knife, but also because boaz will not eat them otherwise. javi will also cut all of the spines off of the cactus before letting boaz eat them.
- in terms of injury, boaz is the most dramatic tank on the planet. this horse could arthur morgan-style run face first into a tree and then fall off a cliff and walk it off. but not before he gimps and limps and whines and teeth grinds his way into javier leading him instead of riding him for the next mile or two. once kieran started taking care of him, there is also a 25% chance of boaz faking a terribly painful injury just to get kieran to dote on him.
- kinda the worst wingman ever LMFAO easily annoyed, easily aroused, easily offended, and as a stallion, HAS to walk in front of the “herd” (his rider’s boyfriend and his horse). pins his ears back, smashes into personal space, flicks branwen with his tail (and preferably kieran, if he can reach him) even sometimes will nip at branwen if the latter tries to calmly make this date a date and not a life or death race (whoever loses, their dad is gay) and walk side-by-side to aid their riders’ hand holdings. will make executive decisions via stopping or veering off for fresh green grass beside the trail, will at points actively attempt to shudder javier out of his saddle (has succeeded once when javi was distracted by a story being excitedly told by kieran), and will also spook and take off running so fast javier thinks it must have broken his neck from the velocity. generally makes trail rides a living hell, but kieran finds it charming, and it makes for some cute shoujo-style “omg … *reaches out to help you up after your horse bucks you off because he saw a log that looked nothing at all and everything like a cougar and pink and white soft bubbles surround me* are you okay ? here, let me help.” moments. maybe some day boaz will be allowed off of the national american terrorist list written by javier “rizzless rider” escuella
ok im tired and that’s all i can think of please enjoy and feel free to contribute 👍 i love them so bad im gona cry
#i’m at the gym for the first time since my od and ouugghh i’m so emotional#it’s 2am aslo. ouu they haunt me#i love thinking about them being silly little domestic cowboys#and just going on dates and riding their little horsies#my fav horse girls !1!!11!1!1!! even tho javi isn’t a horse girl really but in my heart he is cuz kieran loves trail rides#and so javieran go on trail rides a lot as well as “’riding into town’ as an excuse to get out of camp together#javier is so good at listening he truly learned the art of shutting up when he couldn’t speak english and also was learning in america that#he really should trust sparingly because the new world was so incredibly hostile to him from the start simply for being who he was and where#he came from#so he’s such a great active listener and while it’s kinda a trauma response it also works very well for javierans relationship because kiera#has never in his life ever felt important or safe or like anything he said mattered to anyone so perfect brilliant ‘i’m listening go on’ jab#vier makes kieran feel so loved and heard in ways he’s never ever in his life experienced and javi takes them fishing and riding and to the#stables constantly because he’s LISTENED to kieran and kieran never has to ask to do something he wants to do because javi’s already HEARD h#im (and he also knows kieran would never ask for anything first ever because he never feels like he deserves anything at all. nor even feels#safe enough to dare).#and javier gets his cake and eats it too when kieran asks and asks and asks because kieran cares about EVERYTHING right from the getgo beau#se unlike javier kieran has been entirely unable to turn his heart off at all in any capacity so he loves and loves ans loves against his wi#ll so javier has been so adored from the start because kieran can’t HELP it so he gets him gifts and learns things for him and javi just as#much never has to ask for much other than courage from kieran. ever. can anyone hear me is anyone lidtening ouuu#ok enough sorry they make me so emptipnal#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#javieran#kieran duffy#javier escuella#text#hero's talking to himself again#hero’s waxing poetry again#i think that was the tag ¿#im gonna throw up i miss them so bad they’re everything to me oouuggyuuuy
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Late Night Talking
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#MDZS#wei wuxian#lan wangji#This scene had massive 'we are the only two people still up at the sleepover' energy#thought let me set the record straight; wwx doesn't open up in the scene. He fully deflects#Nor does LWJ play with ants B*(#I wanted to merge the two scenes a bit that's all#My OG script was a bit funnier but it broke continuity so rip (i.e: wwx outright stated 'remember when YOU...' in reference to the ants)#also rip to lwj saying 'hey U up?' like he's texting his crush. I hope the spirit is still there#We all know lwj sticks to his 9pm bedtime no matter what#and wouldn't be traditionally texting on a cellphone#He wakes up at 4:30 am to go for a run#gets home at 5:30 to use the lan household computer to go on his shared google doc with wwx and comments 'are you still awake?'#cause lets me real. wwx might also keep a steady sleep schedule but at least he *can* pull an all-nighter#Can you imagine lwj at a sleepover? I admit to being the kid who went to bed and woke up 3-4 hours before the others#you either get fed up and wake someone else up for enrichment - or plan ahead to bring a book - or Walk Home#I fully missed out on all that deep heart to heart stuff. I usually was the one to go 'guysssss we are gonna get in troubleeee go to sleep'#wait this is too much sleepover talk I need to talk about wwx in the last panel. It's a mix of panic and pride.#He's just at the beginning of realizing this guy has changed a lot in 13 years#gonna be a while before more comic pages get posted but they're ready to go in the queue!#(I'm still posting other stuff daily though!)
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there's something profoundly melancholic about rodrigo in s3 like...ever since he buried juan in the garden and felt betrayed by his family for not mourning his loss, he distanced himself from them and became filled with sadness and grief as he hallucinates his younger son out of guilt for the whole mess he caused him by placing heavy expectations on his shoulders which ultimately led juan to become the target of enmity and envy from his siblings. and throughout the season he's always hiding his face either sitting alone somewhere forsaking his duties at saint peter's chair or lingering in the vatican garden just to feel close to him, and at times he even daydreams about his own death hoping to see him again. what stands out is how the narrative is stylized without explicitly mentioning juan's name but his aftermath simply haunted the story and reshaped the family's dynamics forever after the fratricide. i'm also very impressed by how jeremy irons embodied all the sorrow and nostalgia into rodrigo, someone who views his children as the light of his life yet ultimately messes up their lives with his ambitions.
#one of the most heartwrenching things is how much he misses him when no one does#and it just gets me because he only realized all the enmity when it was too late#i actually love how the show ended#cesare went full loose canon villain ready to take the world#the family can no longer truly trust each other#rodrigo accepted that cesare would always keep him in the dark#and gave him control of the papal army out of fear and a sense of having no other choice obviously#lucrezia is aware that her father's and brother's ambitions will always overshadow her own#and the love cesare and lucrezia considered the only constant in the world...#is now forever tainted by how cesare prioritized his own political ambitions above her#and also by alfonso's death lol#the borgias#jeremy irons#rodrigo borgia#juan borgia#text post#tb text post
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i miss my brother so much it feels more like mourning.
#he's still alive#he's out there#i know where he is#but i dont get to see him every day like i used to#i cant walk into his room any time i feel like and annoy him#i cant share a glance with him every time my mom says something crazy#i cant ask him to make me scramble eggs on toast because he makes it the best#i cant watch stupid reality shows with him and laugh with him at all stupid things people say#i cant get mad at him for using all the hot water#i cant ask him to go with me to places just because im too scared to go on my own#i cant gossip with him about everything going on in our lives#i cant hug him after a really hard day#i just miss him having around all the time#and i know i can text him#and call him#any time i feel like#but its just not the same as having him right in front of me#all that to say#i understand how callie feels#and im going to add a lot sibling interactions into mm#or ill die#(figuratively)#alli talks
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do yall see my vision?
#guess who has been reading the jeweler richard LN#im on volume 4 rn#anyway i always thought seigi's crush on tanimoto reminded me of watanuki and his feelings for himawari#i would also put them in the same category of 'hetero-bait' so to speak where they introduce a 'female love interest'#and then later establish her as not a romantic choice for the mc and then they're gay instead#its all subtext in xxxholic but man.......its just text in jeweler richard#also when reading volume 2 of JR i was like 'richard reminds me of someone.........' and then i realized its abeno#abeno haruitsuki is like if richard was in highschool and not the lord of sweets#i actually dont remember if ashiyan is that down bad for abeno but i know abeno is bad for him#hes still got that 'i cant leave you alone' energy especially halfway through when sakae starts showing up#seigi and ashiya have that in common too they both have daddy issues#should i have put that instead?#im too lazy to change it#i really need to reread fukimono i miss them so much#abeshiya is like an old friend to me#jeweler richard#nakata seigi#fukigen na mononokean#ashiya hanae#xxxholic#watanuki kimihiro
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You will get a new Wonder Woman run planned to be a long and structured one - but it's written by Tom King
You will get a new Black Canary run - the thing is, it will be written by Tom King
You will get a series of some silver age partially forgotten characters you like - Adam Strange, Omega Men, Metamorpho - but here's the catch: they'll all be written by Tom King
Why all these times I got something I wanted from DC it was like meeting this wise and cruel Jinn trying to warn me about the potential harm of my heart's desires?
"Be careful what you wish for, little one. Now take this Tom King book" the creature whispers while I sob
#the stories might not be exclusively bad or even poorly written#but when they're good it's not because of the characters he's using but rather despite of the characters#he writes characters with a light disregard for their history and personality#that's why he's better when writing else world-like out of continuity stories#you can take woman of tomorrow for example it's not a bad story per se but it's not good because of kara's traits and personality#supergirl could be any powerful and hopeful character and the story would still work#kara's own side characters are there only as an after thought comet's appearance in the story is almost random#comet deserved better#i wanted ww black canary and adam strange stories for the characters and not to be used merely as a prompt#i do think he's a very gimmicky writer too i used to enjoy his stories before#now i feel like the tone is just predictable and uninteresting i feel like i've read them already#i don't judge the readers though some ppl are attached to his writing they can be powerful tales but they're not really for me anymore#i miss the time when all tom king was writing was batman bc i don't care about his titles lol#tom king#wonder woman#black canary#adam strange#omega men#danger street#metamorpho#supergirl#batman#commentary#dc comics#dc#comics#text#fandom
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mmm im sort of glad they released arcane survivor jayce skin voicelines in league before act 3 drops because my expectations for it were rising a bit too much lmao... before it i almost convinced myself that yeah, viktor's character arc will lead him to manipulate jayce into transferring his soul to a new mechanical body + focus on a new strategy for 'healing' societal issues that isn't 100% evil and bad (while still having its drawbacks re: will and consent) and fighting noxians would place the zaun side in a better position to bargain with piltover for equal rights and a stop to exploitation (with an open ending sure but still), or even a straightforward revolution with zaun getting its independence through a violent protest that piltover wouldn't be able to curb due to being stretched too thin
but uhm.... all of this looks kinda... sigh
i really doubt they'll have the time in the remaining 3 episodes to develop both his and Viktor's motivations to fit those new ideas, feels like more of the same 'it all happened off-screen, trust that it makes sense' journey saying that Viktor is 'still worth saving' feels especially yucky all things considered, like pls stop trying to save that man and let him act and choose for himself for once in this season maybe? never thought i'd miss the times when Viktor was doing unsafe experiments, getting illegal drugs from evil mentors and accidentally fridging random female assistants, but mmm that sure didn't get a proper continuation for him did it... just like with Caitlyn, or even Mel or Jinx, we just can't seem to get a proper development for the obviously Questionable things the characters choose to do, it's all kind of swept under the rug or cancelled out by magic interference i guess, or they changed their mind off-screen so it's fine now now that i think about it, Jayce is the only one who was allowed to somewhat grow and change organically, and yet this arcane adventure of his might end up ruining even that... well maybe Vi too but she didn't have a concrete focus this season, just more of the same 'should i reconnect with my sister/father or kill them off for good' and lesbian angst (if she still goes back to enforcers after this i just... fml) did Ambessa's warmongering get the best of her or was she cornered by the Black Rose shenanigans with no better way out? did Isha have any purpose aside from giving us false hope that Jinx will get better and have a happy ending? will Mel have any relevance aside from the new magical one and managing her own mother? does Viktor want to 'supersede nature' and get rid of human error element now because of his own character journey or because that's just what Hexcore is leading him to do?... will Caitlyn show that she still doesn't get why Zaun is the way it is or will she also go 'yeahhh i made some mistakes, but now we fight a common enemy yay, and i'll be a bit less strict in the future without making any meaningful changes to the status quo... it was all them foreigners fault' it's just all so... aghhh
and yep now i am expecting that the piltover/zaun conflict is overrr because they have to come together to fight Ambessa and whatever is going wrong with the magic, sighhh social conflict plotlines are a little too spicy for our animated league adaptation i guess... ...this is the only voiceline implication i like and even then i can't help but imagine Viktor the damsel in distress begging Jayce to fix the mistakes they both did instead of like, participating in that himself
bonus points if that promise won't even be to Viktor fghgfhgf
#ranting#rantingggg#arcane spoilers#arcane critical#negative#long post#really just needed to vent about this tbh#and once again i am still hopeful that they'll prove me wrong#maybe im missing something#maybe they'll at least give us some great yuri and yaoi bait with cool action sequences and amazing music and ill be too distracted#AND ALSO#i am actually super glad i dont see people complaining as much#because this series is still the best thing happening to animated series in recent years i think#and i dont want to see people get disappointed in that too much#but my personal feelings tho..... yep#text#oh and also im a bit confused about how the time travel works#the way jayce first addressed viktor after returning didnt seem like a repeat of what he went through before that#well we'll seee
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…
#not that it’s happened often or even really with enthusiasm#but I miss getting eaten out#I’ve only had one partner who did so with enthusiasm and took his time#sadly it only happened once because he’s a terrible human being 😅😅#but like no one else has really even tried to eat it since then#and god I just miss the feeling of someone between my legs 🫠🫠🫠#it’s far too late for me to still be awake and to be thinking such things#but here we are 😵💫#mine#text post
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schizophrenic siffrin. end post
#isat#siffrin isat#star text#every time he starts laughing maniacally while having a breakdown i go ME!!!#and also go YOURE SCHIZOPHRENIC TOO!!!!#its not even a headcanon to meits just canon#i could make a more thorough post on this but i fear itd be missing a lot of moments as im not done playing yet#so i shall wait
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feel like he got smth on his mind he's not sharing n it's makin me so sad ♡😞💞
#he's shutting me out completely :'(♡#i feel so unworthy </3😭#im so scared he doesnt like me anymore :(♡#...yet he says he feels the same way n he misses me too ♡🥺💕#but he's just worried abt the future n just doesnt have time :((♡#but i wonder why he doesnt text me as much anymore?? ♡😣💗#miss him w all my heart ♡#liana's diary ♡#tw: negative ♡#just girly thoughts#just girly posts#just girly things#girlblogging#girl hood#girl blogger#girlhood#girly stuff#girly#coquette girl#girlblogger#girly girl#coquette dollete#dark coquette#pink coquette#coqeutte#coqette#coquette#dolletecore#dollete aesthetic#zuzubear ♡🧸
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Hey, look guys, more art-
HOPE.
I’ve been wanting to draw him like this ever since I first saw him smile, but my will to draw eluded me until now! This started off as a doodle, so, please excuse the messiness. I drew this to de-stress.
“Fire” Red belongs to @creatively-cosmic. They have a blog called @themissingnumbers, which is really good! Go check it out if you want to see more.
[Sketch + Colored Version below the cut!]
#Not my greatest work but it’s what I made :)#Hope you don’t mind the lack in quality- haha#I’ve made better pieces#but I still like this one!#I feel like I’m getting better at drawing his hair lmao-#I just kinda messed around with this one but I really wanted to draw him smiling#Fire smiling makes me happy :)#He deserves to be happy#and I hope I can help him attain that happiness.#Even if my help is the equivalent of Baby Steps lmao#Gotta start somewhere!#I could not find the font used for the hidden text for the life of me#but I found a similar one!#Hope Starry and the Mods are doing well!#And I hope we get to see more Happy/Hopeful Fire in the future :)#His smile is precious-#(Bonus!: Y’know what I really wanna see? Red smiling. And not the creepy wide/crazy/manic smiles he usually has.#I mean a true honest-to-god genuine smile. Now THAT would be a sight for the history books. Red deserves to smile too.#Just like everyone else does.#That might be my next goal aside from befriending Leaf—getting Red to smile.#Is that probably going to be extremely difficult? Oh most definitely! But I think he’s worth the effort.)#(Bonus-Bonus!: I wanna give Red a hug so bad-#but I also feel like he’d bite me or something if I tried :(#Maybe he’d just let it happen? Or cry. Or both—who knows?#Red deserves some gentle treatment. He’s been through a lot too.)#I wonder who I’ll get the will to draw next? Hopefully I’ll do them justice!#Long ahh tags Jesus Christ- Didn’t know I could max them out.#Missing Numbers#Fire Red Yuuji#My Art
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i feel rly sad and conflicted abt one of my best friends on earth but idk who to ask for advice bc i usually would have consulted her in this situation lmao
#shes cool and i dont want to lose her and i know Logically i love her but atm i feel so strange towards her#and idk what to do abt it bc i know in the past ive like...over-communicated a lot and over the last few yrs ive been trying to not do that#bc thats an anxious impulse i think .so like . self control#AND IMPORTANTLY . i may actually be the problem here ?? ok again i love her i dont want to lose her etc but basically ive noticed a pattern#which is that whenever she gets a bf/a man (even fwb) in her life she basically stops talking to me and the limited interactions we do have#become abt him. and while i support her it is acc too much. like we barely talked while she was w her ex bf until he became abusive and#then we talked a lottt like all our convos understandably were abt him . and then when they broke up we kept hanging out so i didnt rly see#the pattern there but still she seemed to centre men a lot in her life like sbe was excited to not date and find herself and then#immediately afterwards started seeing this other guy with whom shes basically in a relationship now#hes nice and all but like . HES ALL SHE TALKS ABT . actually we barely talk atp but when we do its abt him#she sends me reels sometimes but its all abt being jealous abt him etc . and shes bi but she said she doesnt like the idea of dating women#bc theyre scary . and i thought she was kidding in the ohhh women r so beautiful that theyre intimidating way but no she was being entirely#fr . she explained jts bc she was bullied by a girl in the past but like...bro ur ex bf literally abused you like surely you see men are#capable of just as much harm? but obvs who she dates is her own choice . but anyway she has consistently made plans w me then cancelled the#like an hr before . or asked to call me and then proceeded to not do so . when i ask her to meet/call its the same she just doesnt respond#or she cancels ? and while i understand anxiety sucks it feels SO WEIRD STILL . maybe im the problem slightly too bc ik i have no right to#feel this way but it rubs me the wrong way that ik she has so much time to spend w him/calls him all the time despite meeting him just a fe#months ago whereas i just have to like ...be ok w not actually having talked to her for a long time#its gotten to the point where when she says do you wanna meet/call i automatically respond yes and then just assume it doesnt happen . like#there have been several times over the past few months i double booked plans over when we were supposed to call/meet bc i was sure she#wouldnt show up and ive been right each time#like she sends me texts that she misses me or im her best friend etc etc occasionally and then acts rly . contrary to that ?#ive talked to her abt the issue w cancelling on me twice btw. when i was still dating the situationship person she would get sooo mad at#them for not respecting my time and shed tell me i deserve better etc etc and then like . she doesnt seem to respect my time at all#anyway she said she understand and she admits to like...being flaky etc but does nothing abt it#and its not like i can tell her to stop caring so much abt men bc we sorta had convos like that b4 she got This involved w this guy#and apparently it did nothing and the last thing i want is to police her relationships or get in her way#its just AUSHD AUGH#anyway i rly miss her it just doesnt feel the same at all anymore
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I need to make Monk gifs, but what really wrecks me is that he *loves* the physical comfort from people, when he can relax enough to accept it... I bet, before Trudy's death, Monk and Leland were more physical, since even after all the trauma Monk still goes for him for physical comfort: hugs, hand touches, just general "please hold me"...
#not me crying about touch starved old men#again#;___;#monk 2002#adrian monk#like with Trudy we can so clearly see how he loves cuddles and so on#they could have made Trudy the only exception but no <3#Monk is just cuddly but too anxious about it ;___;#<3#moss text#and also like#it is obvious that Leland had to accept how much Monk has changed since the mourning#so I wonder if he misses these physical showings of acceptance too...#;__;#it is interesting bc Sharona and Randy only knew Monk after Trudy's death#then there's Ambrose but I don't want to cry even more about these brothers ;_____;
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Every now and then I see the discourse circulate on this hellsite, and I wonder if people know that the term 'yandere' used to have an extremely specific definition that no longer holds up to how people use it today
#I'm old enough to remember the original 'yangiri' discourse someone help me.#I don't have answers for this okay it's one of those things where if enough time and people change the definition of something there's not#much can be done about it. This isn't a call to action or anything. Just an old person talking from a rocking chair.#There's a reason I call what I write 'soft' but it's actually a lot closer to 'classic'.#Anyway that very specific original definition was something like: “so in love it made them sick”#Which often got interpreted as “insecure” or “overprotected” depending on the genre.#A big part of the ending would be either the yan killing themself; their competition; or -- and this is not a joke--#“true love would cure them”#(I don't like that one. I like it when the darling manipulates their yan but that's my personal predilection.)#You can see why some authors might play that for laughs instead of drama#in a uhhhhh sitcom-ish kind of way. Overbearing wife. Guard dog husband. Be careful. He bites.#Anyway the whole “yans hurting their darlings” wasn't unheard of but it wasn't common either? It was an outburst at the world#not an outburst at the love interest. Why won't they just let us be together? I'll make them! They can't get in between us!#At least hurting the darling wasn't the point. Yans aren't meant to be a 1 to 1 for being in an abusive relationship.#It's more about what if someone has too many emotions for one person and they're overflowing.#I dunno. Whenever I hear younger yan fans talk about it it's like “don't quote the scripture at me” kind of feeling#“That's not what yandere is” I was into yandere before you could read. Back when we had dial-up. Leave me alone in my retirement home.#And this is not a kink shaming thing if you're into the whole show of force because of whatever horror-based reason that's your thing#I get it. I really do. But this one is an actual rant about missing the point of the original text:#The whole thing about breaking legs to keep someone around actually meant something when it was a teenage girl trying to dominate a much#larger boy or man. When it's a man doing it to a girl it looses the meaning of the text. Like I get that for most people that's not what#they're going for. But the original usage was doing something. It was supposed to make the powerful feel powerless.#(and to remind people teenage girls are terrifying)
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