#he is having such a normal one with his normal kids and his functional marriage and the good vibes at the red keep

[twistedpink]

Hello your posts have been all over my page and I love them! Also happy holidays if you celebrate!

If it hasn't been done, could I ask for a lovesick Leona. I wanna see this lion lose his mind lol.

Ong isn’t this what everyone wants to see??? Happy holidays to you too!

Whenever lovesick!Leona’s not sleeping he’s busy tugging at and redoing his braids. It’s a nervous habit he picked up when you complimented how neat they were despite his usual bed head, now it feels wrong to leave his hair loose..

Lovesick!Leona was actually in deep denial going through his “damn it, no way I like that idiot” phase, and got so sneaky with his naps. But, the prefect’s never been known for their subtlety! It’s like your ability for finding him is instinctual, and to ward you off he sends Ruggie to be your gopher for a bit :)

Lovesick!Leona that gets paranoid when vulnerable, and there’s no better show of “weakness” than falling in love. Marriages of convenience are very normalized in his home country, and he just didn’t see a functional marriage in his future before you showed up,, + he gets soooo jealous of the time you spend with other people. If you like him so much, then why do you need anyone else?

Leona isn’t as pressured to have kids as the second prince, and he’s pretty happy about it. Some messy cub running around and changing his sleep to work ratio isn’t really something he’s into (unless they’re your EXACT copy). You will never ever get him to admit this under normal circumstances, but you’re the only one he sees a life with. Please don’t tease him for the sappy look on his face, compliment him- preserve his pride just this once. He’ll make it worth your while <33

[blogficsesp]

I'll be waiting (ch. 2)

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When a wound puts you in the way of your almost ex-husband, the months without talking are over and perhaps it is the opportunity to resume your marriage or end it.

*English is not my first language

*Sorry for medical inaccuracies

Chapter 2

It was a weird morning. First, he forgot to start his coffee machine and now he must buy one on the road to the ED. Also, suddenly, the zipper of his second favorite hoodie didn’t want to function. He wasn’t a superstitious person, but deep down he knew that something wasn’t right today.

When he entered the ED, things looked as usual: busy and noisy. At least something was just like always. Or so he thought…

“Good morning, Ahmad”. The security guard looked at him like he was a ghost, not the attending physician.

“Good morning, Dr. Robby.”

Robby made a frown and kept walking to Jack and Dana, both were talking like something was wrong. And Robby’s stomach made a flip.

“Good morning. What’s happening? Why the long faces?”

Always the good friend and more sensitive, Dana broke the silence. “Listen, about an hour ago there was a little fight, nothing mayor, the security guards acted really fast, and no patient or companion were hurt, but one of our own was in the middle and took a fall.”

“So, I guess that they are here, right? And probably Gloria is gonna be up in my ass about it, that’s it?”

Dana and Jack exchanged looks before Jack spoke. “Yes, that’s part of what we needed to tell you. They are waiting for exams results and an x-ray in south 4. From what I observed, it’s only a dislocated shoulder and some scratches, nothing more.”

Robby looked at his friends, and something clicked in his mind, if something happened to one of their team, they had already said it, so, there was only one choice. “When are you gonna tell me my wife is the patient?” He didn’t want to get angry at them, they were trying to keep it as quiet as they can.

“What really happened?” Rooby looked at both, searching for answers, anxious.

This time, Dana spoke. “She was with the family of an oncological patient, just a kid… Anyway, from what I know from the nurses there, the father was abusive, the doctors called child’s service and everything went downhill.”

“How is she?” Robby looked at Jack.

“In pain, levels normal for a dislocated shoulder, but nothing else”.

“She hit her head?”

“No”.

Robby scratched his neck and squeezed his lips, took a breath and lowered his arms, as if preparing for an inevitable battle. “Alright, let’s go, Jack”.

He started walking, beside him, Abbot looked unimpressed but worried. “Look, brother, she’ll be fine, just a couple of weeks”.

“I know…”

“You could send someone else if you’re not ready to talk to her, she understands.”

Robby knew all that, but he wanted, no, he needed to see her. Look at her and make sure that she was as fine as she could be.

When they came to south 4, he inhaled and ran the curtain. There, in the bed, was the love of his life. She looked at both, her hands were trembling, Robby didn’t know if it was for the pain or the aftershock.

“Hello, Jack told me what happened to you”.

Robby came close to the bedside, he didn’t touch you, but it was the closest you have been in more than a year, and you became more nervous. “Yeah, everything was quickly, didn’t have time to react.”

“Did you hit your head?” Robby looked at you with clinical eyes, trying to see if the shoulder was the only problem.

“No, at least I don’t think so…”

“Then I’m ordering more exams, we need to rule out a concussion”.

Jack had that small smile that said a lot without saying anything. He knew that his friend probably was dying to touch you, but was too stubborn to do it, even to examinate your shoulder. They were looking at each other like a deer in the headlights. He cleared his throat. “OK, Robby, can we continue with the shift change? I’m sure that she would be the best patient, right, y/n?”

The look she gave him said that he was going to pay for that later, but he didn’t care, he cared about both. And he wanted to go to sleep.

“Yes, of course… I see you later”. Robby said to his wife, her hands still trembling, so he did what he always did when she was anxious and squeezed her hand before going out with Abbot. His heart was beating fast, and everything he could think about was the warmth of your hand.

______

Taglist: @emma8895eb

[hg-aneh]

Hi,ik I've been asking questions frequently but I'mma do it again bc I'm that petty;

In the AziraCrow relationship/marriage/or whatever. Who do u think is the housewife/husband? 😀

if we're talking about traditional gender roles applied to marriage ((which i believe would NOT apply to them in canon as they're both nonbinary supernatural beings)), i have to preface this by saying that i rlly don't agree with them as a concept

[if ppl choose to engage in them and not judge others for not doing so then good for them (idgaf akfbsjf)]

i hate that they're still being imposed onto people and that they haven't been left in the past for some contexts

i also want to clarify that the following """analysis""" I'm going to make is all for the sake of poking fun at gender roles and satirizing their entire existence.

Having said that, these are my headcanons:

Aziraphale-housewife, Crowley-husband

Why? Simply because husbands are fucking useless and I like to bully Crowley cuz he stinks and he sucks c0ck and b4-

I'm just goofing around 😭

In my little bubble world, they'd be neither (or both if you wanna see it from that POV)

Let's start with this:

If we take the definition of a traditional husband, which is basically "i work and do nothing else cuz I'm a man and men have their mommies i mean wives do everything for them" and take the Work part away, which is what we'd do if we were to place the ineffables in the south downs aka their retirement shack, then you get a useless fuck

And in reality, they both do jackshit (that's the whole premise of s1) so????? does that mean they're both husbands???

For further insight let's try to affirm Aziraphale is the housewife.

Aziraphale bakes, so he's probably a decent cook too; that's "housewife" material. He also happens to be very pretty and plump and a blonde, which I've been told are pretty ladylike things to be (/sarcasm)

(There are no pretty male blondes in ba sing se good omens)

He dresses in light, dainty clothing and talks with an accent only girls and women talk with, as well as getting his nails done and using make up for his magic act, and he says "please" and "thank you", which are things only women do (I'M BEING SARCASTIC. I'M BEING VERY SARCASTIC. god i hate gender rolesAAAA)

Now this is where the comparisons end cuz let's face it, Aziraphale is a lazy fuck.

You KNOW the bookshop smells like mold and he just miracles it clean every now and then.

He'd rather sit his plump (pretty) blond ass on the couch and read the day away than actually get to doing the baking and cooking or caring for the kids (plants) if it's not a hobby activity

Now let's do the opposite and try to affirm Crowley as the housewife.

He's clean (does the cleaning), he's of service when needed, he organizes when he's stressed (read the book), he- he drives a car...

OH SHIT. MAN ACTIVITY!!!!!🤯🤯🤯 (we're still being sarcastic here, it's not over EFJSJF)

In all seriousness though, trying to fit these two into gender roles, even as a joke is kinda difficult even in headcanon-land ajbfsnf

At least that's my opinion

For every traditionally "feminine" thing you have one of them do, the other outdoes that by a mile. And vice versa with the traditionally "masculine" things, like "being useless" and "car" /sarcasm is back.

So which one would be which? I think they're both dumbasses who fight over who gets to do what in the household (neither of them wants to do anything except for cuddling) and come up with an agreement to divide each chore :)

y'know, like normal people in a functional marriage (my parents lol)

[meirimerens]

could you expand more on the lavender marriage? i wanted to look up more posts of yours when you mention it but... tumblr search function... function't...

I don't think I've said much about it because it's kinda self-explanatory okay so the lavender marriage mention [that I can rember] is from le fameux "inheriting the earth" + 5yrs patho kids now adult designs & lore post with both Khan & Capella having "[material] wedding ring, purposefully mismatched as a sign of lavender marriage". for the uninitiated a "lavender marriage" is a type of marriage of convenience that one (or both) party/ies enter to conceal their homosexuality and attempt to reap the social benefits and personal safety of being in a heterosexual marriage. it can happen with both spouses being gay and using the appearance of a heterosexual pair for reciprocal protection, or only one of them being gay and entering the marriage for protection, the non-gay partner may or may not be aware of the other's homosexuality. if both spouses are gay, they may typically lend each other freedom to see other people.

in khan & capella's situation, a marriage of convenience is decided upon early [cf. Capella's lines] for the sake of "bringing the families together" (political alliance). Oh I have sooo much to think about how the older generation (in that case Maria and Vlad Jr) expect the one after them to rub off their blood and rebuild their shed (pivotal element of pathologic anyways [cf. Burakh]) but that's not about this rn. anyways yes marriage of political interests.

anyways now this is where I'm real I think they're both homosexual. capella knows this about khan because she's clairvoyant. khan knows this about himself. he knows capella knows when she gives him her little bunny smile and he remembers she's clairvoyant. he learns later [this is still pre-wedding] she is too and is like oooooh so we fundamentally can't love each other. thank god I just thought it was a me problem. Capella had been taking theatre classes and she learned to do a theatre-kiss [move the mouth to the side so the other kisses cheek, head angle important] for the wedding day. They shamelessly lie to the population to explain why they, bit by bit, stop living together very quickly after the wedding ("we need separate blankets he keeps stealing if off me" "we need separate bed she has such cold feet it's giving me the shivers" "we need separate rooms he snores" "we need separate houses my presence is draining her of her powers"). Maria knows that's not the truth, she's clairvoyant. Whether she feels anything for the brokenness of the ruling families having been pushed onto her brother as a teenager I haven't decided yet. Katerina knows because she's clairvoyant. Basically all the kids know they don't like each other and a select few adults do (not about the gay thing they just think they're in a normal loveless marriage of convenience like is unfortunately really common [a lot had own parents in one] just slightly happier about it)

In my mind's eye (in my eyes' mind) they both have their own lives pretty separate. Khan fucks off overseas, goes to boarding school, and travels, sends back copious amounts of books. Capella gets the telegram installed into the town and he sends short updates on his travels. She stays in town for Mistress Purposes, reads plenty of books and orders khan to go fetch some in obscure londonian libraries, carries the new administration on her shoulders frankly. the marriage stays as a constant reminded to the oldest siblings and the rest of the adults that it is their bullshit that created this unnatural and uncomfortable situation which reflects poorly on the town with how free both "spouses" live their lives. Capella goes dancing with the girls in the warehouses. Khan routinely goes and hang out with [gestures] this one guy who we don't know what their problem is or if they even have a problem anymore. nobody will let them divorce because that would force the town to reckon with its massive political mistakes and fundamentally broken systems. Capella had gone dancing with the girls in the warehouses on her wedding night and khan had found himself there also because he wanted to tell off notkin for running his mouth during the "speak now or forever hold your peace" and insulting the oldest siblings for cf. like 2 paragraph above and when these two begin jokingly asking what capella is even doing here in this dress she goes "it's my wedding day!!" and they make faces and pretend to be gobsmacked and khan says "and I wasn't even invited??" anyways yeah. very funny to me.

okay now what's this "i haven't said much because it's self-explanatory" >proceeds to say much. well hope you enjoyed.

[th3-new-rom4ntics]

-ˋˏ ༻❁✿❀༺ ˎˊ- val's jjba x jjk dr -ˋˏ ༻❁✿❀༺ ˎˊ-

about me

19th of june, 1999.

dear diary, let's start from the start. my name is MARIYA MATSUBARA. born MARIYA ZEN'IN. yes, i'm the one that wrote 'my wandering warrior existence', 'the vegetarian' and 'the house of the sleeping beauties' my mother was HIRA ABBAS, a foreign student who came to study buddhism. however, before she could even start on her thesis, it was too late; she caught the eye of my father MUSASHI and was forced into a marriage she didn't want or desire. despite this, she loved the only child born from this arrangement; despite her daughter being sickly, frail and withdrawn. so that's how i grew up. alone, in a corridor of the zen'in estate, basically by myself. the only reason i wasn't completely thrown out? my immense cursed energy, a product of heavenly restriction-- the complete opposite of my half-brother TOJI, who was also my only friend. me and my mother stayed in that awful place up until i was ten, when my father died and toji left home. with nowhere to go, my mother left the estate with naobito's permission. we lived in sapporo, where she worked as a waitress, receptionist and janitor to pay the bills. i grew up pretty ordinary after that. toji popped in occassionally-- whether it was to extort yen from my mother or to check up with me, i don't know. either way, it was a normal adolescence. i went to school. got decent grades. got involved in a couple of clubs. won some writing competitions. made some friends. the highlight of my high school years was when i did two months of exchange in england, expenses paid by a scholarship, my mother and a part time job at a bakery after high school, i didn't really have direction. university wasn't an option because i needed to help my mum through her COPD diagnosis. so i continued my job at the bakery and picked up another one at a book shop, where i got to indulge in my true passion; writing. it was at that book shop where i met ROHAN KISHIBE, my current partner. i was a huge fan of his manga 'pink dark boy' and recognised him, though i kept my fangirling to myself. i showed him my favourite books before i accidentally let it slip that i was a writer myself. so it began; i'd meet up with rohan, where he'd sketch me, ask about my life and read my stories. he encouraged me to get them published-- so i did. and success came! my first essay, 'my wandering warrior existence,' was far more successful than i could've ever anticipated. i could pay mum's bills, buy myself nice clothes and quit my jobs. i also moved in with rohan, because somewhere along the way we fell in love.

here i am now. successful, happy and stable.

that is, until my brother decided to abadon his kids with me.

great, just great. i guess this perfect life of mine is going to fall apart. either way, you're here for the ride! love,

mariya

report #1 - special-grade cursed object mariya zen'in

Classification: Special Grade Object Name: Mariya Zen’in

MARIYA ZEN'IN is classified as a living cursed object. It was initially believed it to be a non-sorcerer with latent cursed energy due to its lineage within the ZEN'IN clan. It is in fact product of HEAVENLY RESTRICTION. Instead of lacking cursed energy like its biological half-brother TOJI FUSHIGURO, it possesses immense cursed energy.

Though a non-combatant, the subject's cursed energy manifested fully in early adulthood, with its cursed technique SAMSARA solidifying it as an existential threat.

Function: Samsara allows the user to impose a rewritten version of reality upon individuals or localized phenomena. The user declares a modified causal outcome (e.g., “I already dodged that,” or “You were never born”), and the universe complies retroactively, erasing the original sequence of events to reflect the new “truth" temporarily during the duration of the technique.

This technique bypasses nearly all conventional cursed energy defenses, barriers, and even Domain Expansion effects, as it rewrites the context in which those abilities occur.

recommended containment protocol:

Do not engage the cursed object

Under no circumstances should it be provoked emotionally.

Do not survey the target.

Should it activate in a combative context, all non-special grade personnel are to immediately evacuate the vicinity.

[perry-fics]

Steve and Neal: My analysis

I decided to put together an analysis on Steve and Neal’s relationship and why is still ongoing in a way, even though so many bad things have happened between them. So I’m gonna start with a little introduction to who they both are and then see how those two look put together 🧐

Who is Neal Schon?

Neal’s parents divorced when he was young, and from what we know, neither of them paid much attention to him after that. His father was also a musician, and from what Neal has said, he was strict and kind of impatient trying to teach him different instruments. Neal himself admitted that he chose to learn guitar because it was an instrument that his dad didn’t know, so he couldn’t control his learning.

When Gregg picked him from school and introduced him to Santana, he was just 14/5. I think this is crucial: Neal was a kid in that world and he never really learnt to function outside of it. He doesn’t know what a normal life is. When he first left Santana, he tried to settle down with a regular girl, but Herbie ruined that for him, claiming he had his best interest at heart (I don’t buy it). Herbie saw Neal as a rockstar, not a husband, and he pushed him to keep moving, keep playing, and keep making money. And that’s basically what he’s been doing for the rest of his life.

He married like six times, all of them ended the same way: messy divorces, huge payouts, and children he never really stayed in touch with. He wants love, but he doesn’t know how to exist in a relationship after the honeymoon phase.

As a guitarist, Neal is great but underrated, and he knows it. He feels he’s not given enough credit so he constantly posts videos of himself playing and tries to make clear to people that he was the one that came up with this or that. He’s begging people to acknowledge him, to validate him. His massive ego just covers his insecurities. Same reason he clings so hard to Journey, he’s nothing outside of it.

So Neal is a kid who never grew up. He found his identity in music and never built a real life outside of it. He jumps from marriage to marriage, tour to tour, chasing the next new and exciting thing, because without music and the attention it brings, he doesn’t know who he is.

Who is Steve Perry?

Steve admitted that, as a child, he couldn’t say things, so he sang them. Music was his voice and his way to express himself. I think that followed him into adulthood since he’s clearly not the best at saying things out loud. He feels a lot, he’s very sensitive but all he can do with that is put it into a song or bury it so deep no one can see it.

Steve’s parents divorced when he was very young, younger than Neal was. His father was an alcoholic, he left their home early on and Steve’s mom became his closest relationship until her death in 1986. There’s another trauma in Steve’s childhood: he admitted to being abused. He never gave details but that experience could explain a lot about his issues: his need for control, his perfectionism, and his difficulty trusting people.

Steve didn’t make into the music industry by luck; he had to fight his way in. He spent years struggling, with no money and waiting for a break. Herbie said that during that time, Steve was using drugs and manipulating his cousin (?) to get them. Assuming this is true, it shows a guy desperate, he had nothing to lose and was willing to do anything to survive.

When he joined Journey, he didn’t take that opportunity for granted. He soon wanted control over the band. He had fought too hard to get there and he didn’t want to risk anyone taking it from him. I don’t think it was just about his ego, he felt it was necessary to save his opportunity, his fate, to save himself.  

Steve found his identity in being a singer, like I said it was his way of communicating his emotions. So of course he was very protective of his voice. But Journey’s touring schedule was brutal, forcing Steve to keep singing even when it was damaging him. This is the root of his problems with Herbie in my opinion. So it wasn’t just a physical problem, it was an existential problem. Who is he without his voice? That fear and the overwhelming fame was probably the reason why he eventually walked away.

Steve is not better than Neal at relationships. His longest was with Sherrie, he tried to build something normal with her, but it didn’t work. Maybe it was his incapacity to commit, the pressure of fame, or something deeper.

Years later, Steve started a relationship with a woman (Kellie) knowing she had terminal cancer. They were together for a year and a half I think, and he said he even considered marrying her. It’s a sad story but I can’t help wondering what’s behind his decision here. If his problem is commitment, then maybe he felt safe knowing it had an expiration date. Or maybe he wanted to prove (to himself and others) that he could do that, love someone till the end without running.

He later said Kellie was "the love of his life." That’s a safe thing to say because she’s gone, there’s no risk or complications in that relationship. It’s a nice thing for Steve, he can keep it closed and sealed, something that worked well and there’s no chance of screwing it up.

Like Gregg said, Steve handles everything behind closed doors. He is obsessed with his image, and I don't mean his looks, more about the way he presents himself to the world. He knows how to build a narrative, how to sell an image of himself. That image is the angel Steve 😇 we always talk about.

So Steve is always chasing and running:  he chased success, but when he got it, he hated what it did to him. He wants love, but he can’t really let anyone in.

Steve and Neal together

Even after so many decades, breaks, fights, a divorce, a couple of lawsuits and a coup attempt, Steve and Neal are still linked.  Their relationship isn’t just about music, its way deeper. It’s about their identities and their need for validation.

When Steve joined Journey, he and Neal built something together. It was magic and timeless; it made them both famous and rich. It didn’t last because Steve started to pull away.

Steve explained in 94 that he felt pressured to work if he was close to Neal and Jon. So Steve fears is not a real friendship, it’s a work thing. This is the same thing he said a few years ago while explaining why he refuses to have coffee with Neal.

But Neal is different, he doesn’t have a life outside of music so of course he wants to record with Steve, he doesn’t know how to connect in any other way. Journey was never just a job for Neal, it is his home and the only thing in his life that has lasted him more than a few years. So pulling Steve back into that makes Neal feel like he’s getting back all the magic they used to have together.  

At the same time, Steve feels betrayed because Jon and Neal moved on without him. Journey is Steve’s legacy so replacing him with another singer means losing control over his creation. This is Steve’s pain and I think is ongoing.   

But Neal has never let Steve go. Even after having different singer and all that, Neal keeps publicly begging Steve to return, not to the band but to him. He follows Steve fan pages, watches his interviews, always brings him up…

They reconnected briefly in 2022 and it ended badly with Steve suing him over the trademark thing. I’m sure any fan back in 2022 felt like that was the end of this relationship, the final nail in the coffin, but nope! Neal still won’t let go.

So why doesn't Neal let go?

Neal is underrated and he knows it, like I said early. His only way to feel relevant is next to Steve. Without Steve, he’s nothing. Neal may not be aware of this, maybe he feels like his love is pure and selfless but the truth is that in his mind Steve is connected to his best times, the golden years. And he feels that getting Steve back would mean magically going back to these times.

But what about the bad times? The fights? The way Steve controlled the band? Neal doesn’t care. He has been through all that hell and he has decided that he can take all that as long as he gets what he wants. And what he wants is Steve.

Steve doesn’t want to reconnect, but he hasn’t completely shut the door either. Why? Because Steve still wants to be the most important thing in Neal’s life. He won’t give him what he wants, but he also won’t give him closure.

Steve wants and needs Neal to keep chasing him. If Neal ever truly moved on, Steve would…I don’t know, die?

We establish Steve is very controlling, in every aspect really. During the 80s and 90s Steve would let the band in limbo for years; he didn’t officially left so they were just waiting for him. He had the control…until they got tired of it.  

Now, he’s out of the band but he’s doing the same thing with Neal. He won’t see him, won’t work with him, won’t even meet for coffee…but he still throws little bones that keep Neal chasing him.

Steve won’t let Neal have him, but he won’t let him forget him either. That’s a power move. If Steve gave Neal closure, Neal could move on. But Steve doesn’t want that. He wants Neal to miss him, to want him, to feel that hole in his life.

So what does Steve feels for neal?

I think Neal reminds Steve of his best era too, Steve has said that himself. The best and bigger times of their lives together. So he misses that, he misses Neal but he’s afraid he will expect more than he’s willing to give. Like recording, making music, putting Steve out in public in ways he has done before in social media.

So in conclusion…

Neal still believes there’s hope. He still talks about Steve like there’s a chance they’ll reunite, still follows his every move, still begs for him to give him a hug, a smile, a song...

And Steve lets him! Why? Is he evil?

I don’t thing he is evil. He’s been hurt, he’s been abandoned, and he’s learned to control and hurt others before anyone can hurt him. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t care, I think he cares too much and suffers for it. He fears Neal in a way, fears he would use him or that being close to him would bring back old wounds that never close for Steve.

He’s conflicted. He loves Neal in some way, but he’s too scared to open that door again. So instead, he keeps it a little open, enough for Neal to know he’s still there, but not enough to let him in.

So, is he manipulative? Yes.

Is he cruel? Yes, a little

Is he evil? No.

He feels a lot, but only allows himself things that he can control. And he can only control neal from a distance.

So neither of them can fully let go. They're gonna be together in some way forever ♾️

[likeiknoworsmthin]

HC, Bruce is in an On/off (if we're on the same geography location) relationship with Selina and Khoa (each independent from the other) and they're free to pursue other people in the meanwhile, so the bat kids are just wanting to hook up Bruce with Clark and Diana to get ride of Khoa towards the years

Dick "I'm fine with the multiple partners cycle and the on/off relationships, all cool, but I draw the line at fuckin Minhkhoa Khan." Grayson.

Dick (12yo): Supes would be a good boyfriend? don't you think? So nice and gentle, so much better than that bet-asshole.

Bruce: Lenguaje. And Clark is already in a relationship, ¿I thought you like Miss Lane?

Dick: Yeah, but she's a girl. He doesn't have any boyfriend, and you could get him, will be fun.

Bruce: *Horrified at what he has done to Dick's concept of relationships* Most people just have one partner at a time like your parent...

Dick "Circus kid": ¡Ja! You should come up with something better, nobody does that, my parents used to kiss other people all the time.

Bruce: *refrains the urge to facepalm. Of course. And of course, thinking about his family, he has no one to use as an example* I'm really not making this up, most people date a person at a time. Besides, I think he's straight.

Dick: *confused* That doesn't even make sense!

Bruce: It means that he does not feel attracted to men. At all. I'm serious, Dick, don't bother him.

Dick: *snorts* Yeah, sure, B. *Wanders off of the bat cave*

A few weeks later, being baby-sat by Clark.

Dick: So... I heard a rumour

Clark: ¿Yeah? ¿Something you want to share?

Dick: Is it true that you only date a person at a time or is just for one of each.

Clark: *FLUSTERED, too flustered to function* ¿Wha-...?

Dick: yeah so you can have a boyfriend ¿Right? Or aunty Lo is in a relationship with Clark, ¿No? So ¿Superman can have a boyfriend? B does that sometimes.

[Clark.exe stop working.]

Later Clark's going to yell at Bruce for what kind of dive he's raising a poor kid in. ¿What the hell is he taught him with all his "playboy" thing? Poor kid will be traumatized...

Jason "My father is a cheater and my mom has to sell herself for her dose. ¿What even is monogamy" Todd.

Jay(13): So you like cats? *Just after a very dramatic fight between Diana and Cheetah, while Jason is visiting for the new museum exhibit*

Diana: .... *Utterly confused* Yes, of course.

Jay: Not to rain in your parade, but that cat-lady is too... Unique for you. Don't cha'? Should try the Gotham, flavor, she's classy and include a bonus bat.

Diana: *Holding laughter* I didn't mean it like that.

Jay: Yeah, sure, keep telling ya that. *Stops here, but tries to bouch for Bruce and Selina every chance he has. Diana is too amused.*

Casandra "My parents didn't even teach me how to talk, not even mention what a "normal" relationship is like" Cain.

Cass (15): *Shoves the three of them under a mistletoe in a holiday Wayne gala (It's Bruce's gala, Clark is working and Diana is a guest)* Now, Kiss.

Tim "My parents each have multiple lovers outside marriage" Drake.

Tim (14): *pulls a power point* ¿Have you ever heard the benefits included in date The Bat? Could be a interesting offer for you both. First of all, money will not be a problem anymore....

Clark *fresh out divorced and forced to confront that he is, in fact, NOT straight and his "brotherly love" for his best friends has nothing of brotherly in it"

Diana: *Remember when Jason used to try to pull this out, so she's a little nostalgic and very amused*

Steph "Actually I have a good basis but my dad is an asshole and monogamy never did nothing for my mother" Brown

Steph (15): So, you're kissing with the boss

Clark: No...

Steph: then you should.

Clark: I...

Steph: ¿Why no? You're a cute couple.

Clark: ¡We're not...!!

Steph: c'mon, just a kiss...

Carrie "My parents are monogamous but I don't know them enough to make an affirmation about it" Kelley.

Carrie (16): So, Boss ¿When are you going to stop your stubbornness and admit that you want to eat their faces?

Bruce: That's very crude and I don't.

Carrie: then you want them to eat your face. Tomate tomato.

[dreamyrat]

now that i’ve written about sappy functional middle aged labru i’m thinking about more realistic and sad scenarios…

kabru who gets married young and has children because HEAR ME OUT he believes it makes him more trustworthy than being a bachelor… not quite aware of why he feels the need to appear as normal as possible around others and encouraging laios to do the same… continuing to be unaware of his feelings for laios, writing it off as purely sexual and therefore easy to deny and ignore, despite the fact that he’s closer to laios than anyone.

laios never marrying because the idea of disrupting the status quo is uncomfortable, since he just got used to being king and kabru’s family. also fundamentally disagreeing with kabru’s opinion on needing to get married just for the sake of others, by extension never having to confront his attraction to kabru, even being afraid to get near it mentally. thinking that his jealousy and insecurity stems purely from the threat of losing his closest friend and confidant, DEFINITELY no other reason.

I think kabru would marry a working class woman rather than nobility because they can relate to each other better, the idea they both have to serve people in some capacity, and all the turmoil and triumph that comes with that. I imagine kabru performing the role of doting father and husband very well. his wife loves how attentive he is and how he notices things about her no one else ever has. he’s patient but stern with the kids and earnestly connects with them. until he ultimately burns out and his wife realizes he can’t be honest with her, despite years of trying to get him to open up. up until that point his romantic relationships had all been fun and non committal, and she took pride in the fact she made him want to settle. she never could fully explain what was off about their relationship, because he really was very kind and loving, until she realizes how deeply kabru has repressed his emotions and cant help but question everything and feel she fundamentally misunderstood kabru as a person…

maybe a near death experience with laios triggers it, and kabru’s unable to take care of himself completely, he can’t mask his fear and neurosis and rage anymore, he can’t eat or sleep until he’s okay. he throws himself into his work and refuses to acknowledge that he is struggling when she asks him about it. her realizing that despite kabru’s best efforts to love her and care for her, his relationship with laios is more emotionally intimate than theirs, will always be what drives him and centers him, and she shouldn’t have to compete with that… she obviously mourns what she thought their marriage was, and can’t help but feel betrayed, but overtime starts to feel a deep empathy for him.

I guess I want to explore how kabru’s social dexterity has the potential to be just as destructive as laios’ social ignorance… even though they both have the best intentions and care about others.

when his wife divorces him, he is forced to be honest with laios about why she left, and he has immense guilt over not being able to love her correctly, about being fundamentally flawed and strange, the child that was raised to be a perfect doll, the monster kid no one wanted to play with, how his efforts to compensate for his innate wrongness blew up in his face anyway, which obviously laios can relate to better than anyone.

I think they would dance around each other after that, both now fully aware of the attraction but being so practiced in the art of denial they dont know what to do. It just feels so good to have it out in the open, they forgot that they can actually do something about it. Also kabru feeling like he shouldn’t be allowed to indulge after causing so much pain.

when they finally do get together, it’s surprisingly shy and chaste at first, like they are scared to face the depth of their desire and the years they wasted. it’s slow until it’s not, and everything bubbles to the surface, and they have mind blowing autistic sex. lol.

as for his children i think laios always really liked them as their weird uncle and since he has no heirs, he’d leave his kingdom to them. I’m not sure if kabru’s ex wife would be able to have a relationship with kabru after they get together, but maybe… maybe they could be friends.

[mae-i-scribble]

I rewatched a few of the early episodes of spyfam today bc getting to see the movie gave me an itch to scratch, and in particular episode two made me finally able to conceptualize what about fandom twiyor that irks me so deeply. If you like widespread fandom interpretations of them I would uh, look away bc none of my opinions on it are positive.

Episode 2 of the spyfam anime remains one of my favorites because of all the little flourishes the studios add to sell you on Yor as a character while also expanding a bit on the manga's original commentary on the stigma that follows older single women. What draws Yor and Loid together as a family is that neither of them are capable of having conventional relationships. Both of them are war orphans forced to grow up far too soon and who threw away aspects of their humanity to fight for what they believe to be a better world. While Loid's position as a spy and mastery of deception allows him to avoid the stigmas that would come from the ordinary person discovering what he does, that is not something that holds true for Yor, whose weakest point is that she simply cannot understand "normal." She's aware of the way her coworkers demean her and insult her but can do nothing about it because her only conflict resolution skill is murder. She is constantly reminded that she is an outsider, hence why Loid's declaration at the party is so meaningful to her, and what convinces her to ask him to continue the facade as a married couple.

Underneath it all however, is a quiet showcase of amatonormativity that drove both Loid and Yor to their arrangement. Eden requires a student to have a perfectly nuclear family. Societal conventions dictate that Yor, happily single at 27, is someone pathetic (to her coworkers) or someone in need of help (to her brother). Marriage is an expectation that Yor is pressured to commit to, and a societal requirement that Loid must uphold for the sake of his mission. And while this showcase begins in episode 2 it is something that spyfam continues to highlight when it comes to the expectations both Loid and Yor struggle to meet when they try to hard/become to anxious over what is "expected" as a married couple vs what the other person is actually thinking/feeling.

Now, what the fuck does this have to do with fandom you ask? Here's the thing. Spyfam reached the broad range of anime fans when it exploded in popularity, which is when I started engaging with it beyond just comments on the latest manga chapters. Modern fandom already has the issue of classifying ships into tropes rather than actually like, shipping characters as they are. And that's exactly what happened with twiyor. People began going "oh my gosh this is the moment she fell for loid," "oh he's so in love with her just look at him," before we had even reached episode 10. Which was incredibly frustrating to me because clearly Loid and Yor are not anywhere near in love that soon in the story- and the basis for that frustration starts in episode 2 for me. Because Loid and Yor's marriage is one that is unconventional from the very beginning, and it is that factor that defines their dynamic an allows them to function as healthily and sweetly as they do. People don't need to be in love to be married or to be a parental unit. None of that requires romantic love, it is simply an expectation of our society, the same sort of expectation that cripples Yor and makes her think she has to find a partner, then that she has to find a husband to appease those around her. Seeing that completely erased in a large portion of art/commentary/fics written about them angers me because its something baked into the foundation of their dynamic and something I feel enhances them as a potential romantic pairing rather than detracts from it. But we can't have that because of course a man and woman living together and caring for a kid fell in love almost immediately.

And don't even get me started on how people misinterpret Loid for their far more romantic interpretations of his motivations and relationship with Anya and Yor or else I will start losing teeth from how hard I am clenching my jaw

[almacambiondaughterofsaleos]

Stolas Should Stop Forgetting He's A Father In His Obsession To Find Romance

I notice one thing after his affair with Blitzo Stolas has time and again put aside the needs of his daughter to fulfill his own grand romance fantasy. Despite the narrative trying to plead with us he's a good father who just makes mistakes, he's shown he's really has more and more forgotten his daughter at times in his quest to feel self-satisfaction. The narrative tries to pant it as him deserving a chance to find happiness after sacrificing his own by staying in a toxic marriage to give his daughter a normal life. However, he easily throws away that normal life for his romantic obsession showing what he really wants. The minute he got a chance to have a chance of selfish satisfaction he took it without any mind to how it would affect his daughter because the so-called sacrifice he made was just to give him pity and sympathy so we don't condemn him for cheating.

Again despite saying he's sacrifice much of his happiness so that Octavia could have a functional family. He still sacrificed Octavia's happiness so that he could have his fantasy with Blitzo and is not regretful even taking his boytoy over on a family trip then blatantly flirting with him in front of her. And again he caused so much harm to her by dragging her into a deteriorating marriage and now a messy divorce which he is shown willing to focus more on fighting with her mother (even blatantly insulting her in front of his daughter) , while breaking a promise they made since she was a kid. Even when he's worried she is lost, he still gets distracted by Blitzo and it takes freaking Loona to find her. Again the man has made a big thing about giving that girl a happy life, while a the same time ignorant he's destroyed it.

Even though Stolas says he wants to feel loved and be someone's someone, it really shows me at heart he really has take his status as father for granted and trivialized the familial bond between him and his daughter. He needs to stop being an immature love sick teenager and be there for a child whose home life he's wrecked in his quest for self-fulfillment. Even though Stolitz is endgame, if it wasn't he wrecked his home life for nothing and no the Stela is the devil excuse is bs because it was made to justify Blitzo being the one for him. Ultimately, he would have sacrificed his daughter's home life for his selfishness. That again goes against portraying as the so-called good dad when a good dad wouldn't bring down their child's home life. He's waiting so eager to find his knight that he's forgetting the little princess who should be the center of his world. And that's pretty sad to a dad who previously did that and now thinks he can walk away from those duties because he thinks he's earned a reward for his "sacrifices".

Stolas just seems to be one of those parents who did well as a parent when they were younger, but now that they are teens they neglect them thinking that they are older and they don't need guidance which will never be true. A child will always need a guiding parent, but when a parent is immature like Stolas they will feel like they are being led blind due to how unreliable and self-centered they are. It also shows how lazy Stolas is because he seems to think that his daughter can do okay being by herself while he can go frolic at will with his boy toy when in reality it does affect her. He's pouring so much focus onto Blitzo it cuts into actually spending genuine time with her and being there for her. These days he's not fully with her and is just pouring his energy into getting his dream imp while she can be lucky to barely get a mention in his radar.

[all-pacas]

okay so i've been trying to make sense of what drew cameron and chase together enough to get married. sex i get. they're friendly at work, they're attracted to one another, okay. but marriage? then i thought, hmmm. i wonder whether it was like a house&wilson situation in some ways where cameron, who's seen as the nice and caring one, can be mean sometimes without chase thinking the worst of her. i'm not sure it works as well on chase's end since we don't see her observing or commenting on the moments where chase shows he cares, but she knows he went to kutner's memorial despite not really knowing him, etc.

on the one level, i don't think it's that complicated: in their hearts, cameron and chase are very boring people who crave normalcy, and 'normal' couples get married after a couple years of dating. i'd argue they were very much not ready for marriage on one level, but they… were a pretty functional couple tbh. in a pure "this is the next step" way, it made sense they would get married.

cameron tends to define herself by her relationships and seek love; in a weird (slutty) way chase is the same, he is the neglected kid who craves and is terrified of connection. they're both also guarded people, and hurt people, who want similar things from a partner. and i think they did get things from the relationship.

chase actually alludes a couple of times to admiring cameron, which i can very much see: his fondest memory of her is her yelling at her father (i laaaaaaaugh), he angrily tells dibala she's a good person, she's also mountains of caring and affection and he is massively starved for both. even in their s1-2 friendship era, he's actually surprisingly prone to defending her ideas to house; i wouldn't call him protective of her exactly, but chase doesn't exert himself for a lot of people, and he's pretty consistent in sticking up for her. he's also unusually good at seeing through cameron and reading her like a book, which maybe isn't unique to chase but is probably unique to cameron: the last person to see through her was house on their date and he used it as a list of reasons to dump her; chase meanwhile calls her on her bullshit but always in a… positive context, i care about you, i'm not giving up on you, i want you.

cameron has the habit of cutting and running when she feels too vulnerable. foreman says she's afraid of commitment and he's 110% correct, but it's not the dating and loyalty and acting the part of a good girlfriend she struggles with; it's opening up and trusting others. cameron is terrified of loss, terrified of loss of control, struggles to make decisions, to commit. (although once she finally does she is ride or die for her cause) chase actually spends most of their relationship acting as a very reassuring figure for her: "i know you're acting this way due to your issues, and i am giving you space, but i need something from you" is essentially his answer in the itch, he calls her bluff with the sperm, and he is………remarkably forgiving of her in saviors lmao. it's the same thing he does in s3: he sees through her "i have no feelings for you" excuses and is willing to wait her out. cameron… needs that. she gets to have her freak out and push and be demanding and, yes, a little mean, a little unkind, and chase tolerates it. accepts it. i honestly think he was a huge source of support for her. she's afraid of loss, and she cannot accidentally drive chase away. you know?

i don't know that cameron was ever sitting around going "that chase, he's so nice" lol. although: they do get along, she is the least likely in the office to make fun of him (and usually only when he picks on her first -- her famous "you'd be done already" sperm sample line does only come after he's been joking about the patient fantasizing about her), she is definitely the least likely to accuse him of being dumb or useless. and like. cameron is a silly guy! she likes joking around, she likes messing with people a little, i don't think she was as drawn to chase's inner kindness as much as the fact they just can be silly together. she knows he cares about people, she's trusted him as a friend for a long time (never forget her going to chase with her romantic problems in s1), it's not like she doesn't like him. it's also not like they have no problems bickering or arguing, which i am going to frame as a positive: they're really not afraid of one another, they don't idealize one another. when chase annoys her, cameron lets him know. it doesn't have to be perfect!

obviously, they still had major problems. cameron really doesn't seem to have pegged onto the fact that chase is a hot mess of abandonment issues, and his freezing her out in s6 triggered her flee response (although, cameron worked very hard to stay with him, she was jumping through every hoop possible to handwave his murder), and chase's own avoidant habits mixed with her obliviousness can also lead to problems, as we saw in s5: when cameron avoids issues, he feels shut out and abandoned. when chase avoids issues, he stews and cameron putters on oblivious. the two just… have no idea how to communicate about Real Issues. but on a day to day basis? for the little things? i think they got along great. i think it was all smooth sailing until the moment it wasn't. they were always going to crash and burn and failmarriage, but it says something it took a literal political assassination to trigger the issues that tore them apart. they probably could have coasted on for years easily, because deep down they want to be happily married (with someone, not even necessarily one another even), you know?

the house and wilson parallel is interesting to consider, because even though chase is house's baby successor and cameron and wilson are often paired up even in the show… i think it works better the other way around. cameron and house are much more similar than they're given credit for, being driven and stubborn and filled with a sense of outrage and injustice (that they manifest in very different ways); they both want to pick people apart and understand them, to understand as a way of control. they both push people away and are afraid of loss. chase, meanwhile, falls handily into the role of cameron's top supporter, with what he gets out of the relationship sometimes a little unclear — but what he gets is normalcy, to "be himself", to open up to someone and trust them. he enables and supports her, and she sometimes struggles to reciprocate. something there for sure.

[atopvisenyashill]

what kind of girlmoms do you think visenya and rhaenys would've been had they given birth to daughters (assume rhaenys lives long enough to make more of an impact on a hypothetical child)?

it’s so hard to say with rhaenys and i feel bad being like “she’d be fine ig” and then digging into all the ways visenya would traumatize a daughter aksjdjd but it’s so funny To Me how rhaenys (+ aegon) are seen as the Parents of the targaryen rulers when rhaenys has very little to do as a mother. We don’t even see her interact with other children like we see Visenya with Ronnel. Like, Visenya parents Aenys more than Rhaenys does, but Rhaenys is lauded as the Great Mother - but of course she is, she dies before she can show herself to be just as mediocre of a parent as everyone else, whereas Visenya lives long and struggles & has her failings and is pilloried for poisoning Aenys & usurping him & being an ungrateful witch, yada yada. It’s like how kids will resent their good parent but love their bad/abusive parent bc the bad parent is Fun but the good parent is actually parenting and making them eat veggies. Rhaenys gets to be the eternal fun parent because she died before really being a mother, and Visenya is the eternal bad parent because she did the actual hard work of trying to turn Aenys into a functioning person.

I go back and forth on Visenya girlmom. Her relationship with Rhaena is like, Soooooo bad but that makes sense - Rhaena is not HER child, a dynastic threat. Look at Cersei. She’s not a good mom but she actually isn’t terrible with Myrcella! I really think that speaks well of Cersei trying to spare Myrcella the pain she herself experienced, if giving Myrcella outlets for her own intelligence. Now I think Cersei would do very badly with a more tomboyish daughter (too much like her!!) but she’s not a BAD girlmom! She’s pretty adequate even despite her hang ups. Obviously a Visenya daughter would have the added stress of Visenya insisting on her marrying Aenys, but she'd have the freedom of a dragon.

On the one hand it's like, I think a lot of Visenya's "bad mom to Maegor" issues come from her wanting to get him on the throne and feeling (rightly imo) pushed out by Aegon. That's not as big of an issue with a daughter, because she has a guaranteed way to join her line with Rhaenys' - it's almost like a Daemon and Rhaenyra's boys situation. Daemon seemed mollified by the engagements of his girls to Rhaenyra's boys but would that be enough for Visenya? Simply to know that her grandson will be king one day?

Of course, you have the issue that Visenya knows is likely going to be an issue and thats can her daughter even have a child. There's an added stressor there that can't really be denied and if Maegor is anything to go by, Visenya is going to exacerbate it (because like....does she ever tell Maegor "yeah babe it's not super likely" or does she believe it's something she can get around and that's why she encouraged the marriages to Alys and Tyanna? we don't really know but To Me it feels like Visenya always sort of expected fertility would be an issue with Maegor).At the same time, we KNOW she put all sorts of pressures on Maegor but he was still completely devoted to her, and that tells me she was probably a strict mom, perhaps a "bad mom" but a loving one, one where her faults are easy to forgive - we don't get any sort of hint that Maegor feels about her the way Joffrey seems to feel about Cersei for example. So that lends itself to the idea that Visenya would be kind to a girl. BUT THEN AGAIN she's essentially relegating her daughter to her own fate - married to a male relative because her own claim will never come first, never be good enough. Visenya doesn't have a bad life but she seems to be (again imo) very frustrated and unfulfilled. Will a daughter resent this?

I'M NOT ANSWERING THIS WELL ALSJFDKL I think Rhaenys would be....probably a mostly normal mother. Not exemplary but not like, uniquely traumatizing. I think Visenyas has the potential to be traumatizing but I don't think that means she'd be a bad girl mom, just kind of a weird one?

[tokiwarcube]

Genuinely curious!

As unbiased as you can be, which band members do you think have the most boyfriend/husband potential? Like ranked? Maybe with quick, easy reasons as to why you think so? Just something really quick for the flight!

Like I said, I'm just curious where you stand on this since you're my favorite metalocalypse writer atm!

ME? A FAVORITE? You're so sweet, thank you so much!!! <3 Rankings + reasonings below the cut <3

1.) Nathan

Besides Toki, Nathan is the only one who has really shown a desire to get married — and not just with Abigail! It’s been more subtle (e.g. within bonus content for DVDs), but Nathan does think about marriage and long-term relationships quite a bit, even when he isn’t actively dating. I think he’s also had the most normal home life, and while he might not necessarily want a white picket fence and golden retriever, he does have a good idea of what marriage looks like for him. Does he have issues with communication? Yes, of course he does. And that can certainly yield some issues, especially when you’re in a more sensitive state where a bit of tenderness is needed. But he does also show a drive to improve, and when he really cares about someone, it’s clear that he’s capable of shoving down his embarrassment a bit to help.

2.) Pickles

Pickles is complex. He didn’t grow up with a good view on marriage — Not just because of how much he hates his parents, either; even as a young child, he could see just how loveless Molly and Calverts’ marriage was — but that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t consider it someday. But honestly, he’s so out of practice in the dating scene. Most of the relationships in his youth were quick flings, and since getting famous with S&B (and later Dethklok,) he hasn’t really had to put in effort for… anyone. You can get into a relationship with him pretty decently, sure, but that doesn’t mean he’s a picture perfect partner once you’re with him. There’s hardly a time of day where he isn’t drunk, high, or both — and sure, he can usually function pretty well under the influence, but it’s definitely something to be aware of. And there's also days where he cannot stand to be coherant in any capacity, and it's very... well, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't heartbreaking. Sometimes he's sad. Sometimes he's angry at the world. Sometimes he's just loopy. You're never quite sure what you'll get when he hits that point, but it's never pretty. His parents also continuously yield issues — even after telling Molly to fuck off, they still unfortunately exercise a presence in his life (both through physical means and through unresolved memories) that can lead to some touchy moments. And he’s the best communicator out of the boys, but again, he hasn’t done the whole “relationship” thing in a very, very long time. Re-learning how to communicate in that sense is a bit of a challenge! He gets there eventually, but it takes some patience. He’s a very sweet lover once he settles in, and he’s the definition of a ride-or-die.

3.) Toki

I think pre-season 2 Toki and post-season 2 Toki are two very, very different people (Nevermind pre and post Requiem/Doomstar), and I think timing does play a very important role in his dateability. Death has always been ever-present in his life, a dark curse woven into the very fabric of his being… but his father’s death affected him in a way that he’s never quite been able to heal from. And the unfortunate thing is, is that he doesn’t really connect his current struggles with the trauma of what’s happened. He never fully worked through his childhood trauma, and he hasn’t even touched the present. And so he’s also prone to flipping between an almost suffocating attachment and this very tumultuous, yet yearning, detachment. He struggles to communicate what he wants. He desperately wants a long-term relationship, has always idealized the idea of marriage and kids, but communication is… hard. And there’s a lot of times where he just expects problems — financial, emotional, or otherwise — to just be fixed. Or, he just pretends they don’t exist. He’ll slather this facade of sunshine and rainbows onto the world — everything is fine, even when the falling snow sends him on a week-long binge of daydrinking. Can he recover? Yes, absolutely. But it’s a long road that requires a good mix of patience and firmness. But don’t take this as only negatives — when he loves, he loves unconditionally. He’s the easiest person to get into a relationship with, because he’s just so genuine with you. He’s not thinking about the embarrassment of vulnerability, or his own flaws — he just knows he loves you, and he wants you to know that too. And it’s very endearing! Once he’s committed, which frankly comes very quickly, he’ll go to the ends of the Earth to make you happy. And despite his lavish lifestyle, he has a very deep love for the little domestic things.

4.) Skwisgaar

The whole idea of marriage leaves a very sour taste in his mouth — with how he was raised, how could it not? Getting him to date in the first place, even for a month, is a Herculean feat. He’s used to filling his life with meaningless — fun, but still meaningless — sex. And when he isn’t fucking, he’s busy building thicker callouses, practicing until he can’t anymore. He doesn’t need love, he tells himself. It doesn’t exist. Nothing but a fantasy that normal jackoffs subscribe to to make their meaningless lives feel a little less dull. He’s a good friend, but getting him to even admit that he has feelings for you other than lust is a difficult task, no matter how strong those feelings are. Marriage is a whole separate beast. I think once he’s in a relationship, and he’s started to accept the breadth of his feelings for you, he can be a very good lover. We’ve seen he has very sweet and genuine moments with the boys, and it’s not like he doesn’t care. He listens, he’s thoughtful, he’s funny and sweet. He’s got a good heart on him. But marriage? He might come around to it someday, but it’s a pretty firm “might.”

5.) Murderface

William has entrenched himself in a very, very deep pit of self-loathing. He’s like a rabid dog, fearful, lashing out at the helping hands who want to help him out of that pit. He wants to be free so fucking bad, but he’s afraid. Terrified, even. He’s prone to saying very hurtful things he doesn’t mean — both to get a reaction, and to keep his inner self safe. It’s very self-sabotaging. And he flips very rapidly between this false haughtiness and genuine self-flagellation that honestly, it’s hard not to be pushed away by. Which on some level, is the intended effect, even if he doesn’t consciously acknowledge it. He wants to love and be loved, he just doesn’t know how to do that without being vulnerable. You have to be very patient and observant to date him, nevermind marry him. But do know that when he loves, he does genuinely love unconditionally. He’d do anything to keep you out of harm’s way, even if it causes him inconvenience or harm. You don’t even have to be dating for that level of self-sacrifice, really. But getting him to open up at all is a very, very hard process.

[queerlilchinchin]

Pregnancy Announcement Reactions

Because I'm in the mood to talk about it and some of these reactions were just so damn precious I need to talk about them.

So, I'm under the 10 week "wait period" of being pregnant, where it's safer to be excited/announce that you're pregnant, but I've been telling some people, because I've miscarried before and I want to have some people that I can turn to if The Worst happens again.

So... here are some of the reactions from some of the people I've told.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Auntie (maternal figure): "Oh! Uh... how do you feel about that? Excited but anxious? Well, yeah, that's totally normal. But you're excited so I'm excited for you!" She was hesitant to be excited at first, I think because she remembers that this has happened before and when I miscarried, it destroyed me. It still hurts, 11 years later. So, that combined with the fact that I'm unmarried and with a man I've been dating a year and a half after an awful marriage, I think she was cautious to get too excited too soon. But in the end, she received the okay to be excited, so she was then happy for me.

Boyfriend (the father): *stare* --- *silence* --- followed by spoiling the shit out of me about 20 minutes later when the initial shock wore off and he could mentally function again (with an immense amount of apologizing over his initial reaction). We'd just had a conversation literal days before about how I've been feeling like he doesn't actually want kids with me and some deep-seated anxieties I'd been having about us and how our relationship was going (in my eyes), so I think that conversation being so fresh only to find out I was pregnant was... A Lot. Both of us realized it was a possibility but I don't think he actually believed it was true. I did. Sometimes a woman can just tell.

New Boss: Kinda similar to my auntie -- Hesitation followed by "are you... happy about this? Is it good?" When I said yes - "Oh good!" And then an exuberant amount of excitement. Apparently he LOVES kids and is really excited for me to become a mother, even though he just met me lol. We've had some pretty deep conversations since about parenthood and my past and stuff. He's a pretty good person to talk to about these things, ngl. -- anyway, I think he's almost the most excited person for me xD

One of my absolute best friends (and the first person I told after the dad): "!!!!! How do you feel?" Followed by lots of conversation about really personal stuff because he, too, knows about my past and the things I struggle with and listened to me vent about my worries and encouraged me. I don't know what I'd do without him. If you're reading this, thank you and I love you 🩷🩷🩷🩷

Old coworker that I'm also becoming good friends with: "holy shit congratulations" -- followed by catching up on life because it's been a little while since we've caught up xD

Boyfriend (the dad)'s mother: now this one I was anxious about because on Christmas, we made a joke to her and her husband that "we're making babies" when we went outside together alone and her hubby asked what we had been doing back there and her response was "I'd just better not find out the same way I found out last time" (he has a son)... she was perhaps the cutest of all (eventually). At first it was just a blank stare of horror. I got super anxious, thinking she was pissed at me, so I started rambling details about how long we knew, etc. and then once she snapped back to reality, she asked "is this... good? Are we happy about this?" I said yes, happy and anxious. She congratulated me and we chatted about her other grandchildren and how anxious I've been.

The best part of the last story is this: by the time she left the apartment (we spoke about it alone, btw. Mr. Daddy was at work (but permitted me to tell her by myself)), she was dancing away from the building (not after saying she was leaving to beat her son xD) and sing-songing "I'm gonna be a grandma again!" It was so... so endearing to see that in the end, she was happy about it. I genuinely thought she'd shun me or something. We've only been together a year and a half, but when she realized I was happy, she was too. And kind. And helpful. And since, she has helped with groceries twice. Today, I got a random message that she brought us food again out of nowhere, which made me laugh because I had just told my bf the day I told her, but right before we agreed to me telling her, that if she knew I was pregnant, she would be so much worse about spoiling us with groceries.

Guess who was right lol.

Anyway. Those were some of the reactions to my pregnancy announcements. I also had a couple of friends react to the news here on tumblr on my very first post where I talked about being pregnant, but I just wanted to talk about those.

I'm glad to know that this time, opening up and letting people I trust and love know the news, even if it's still in the risky time period of pregnancy, I know I'm supported. People that love and care about me have my back. If I get the devastating news again that I lose this baby, I won't have to deal with it alone again. I'll have people I can turn to that will be there for me, and that knowledge is everything. 🩷

Doctors and other people recommend not telling anyone you're pregnant until you're past 10 weeks because there's such a heightened chance of miscarriage, but as someone who suffered so drastically the first time I miscarried, I actually recommend telling people that you trust to help you through it if the worst happens, because it feels so lonely to go through it. I didn't have a supportive bf at the time. In fact, I'm pretty sure he purposely contributed to me having it... however, if I had let people be there for me the way that I plan to this time around... life would have been so much less horrible during that time.

I love you guys. I appreciate everyone that's there for me. 🩷 I can't wait to share this journey with my family and friends.

[cosmic--dandelion]

So, about Stolas and Octavia:

Divorce just fucking sucks. It's one of the hardest things most ordinary people will ever have to face in their lives, and it's especially hard on kids. But Stolas doesn't and shouldn't have to give up his relationship with Blitzø just to make Octavia happy. Parents moving on from their ex-spouses and discovering new love is part of the healing process, and even children need to accept that their parents aren't in love anymore.

Stolas's marriage with Stella was abusive and hideously toxic, and he's completely justified in ending it. The marriage made Stolas so miserable that he was day drinking and abusing anti-depressants just to get through another day. Their home was already long broken and dysfunctional before Blitzø showed up.

There's no magic button or quick-fix cure-all that's going to take away all of Octavis's hurt. It's just a difficult, painful, confusing, and exhausting situation that happens all too often in real life. There's nothing more Stolas can do for her besides reassure her that he still loves her, and guess what! He already did that!

Stolas isn't a bad father because he doesn't spend every waking second obsessing about Octavia. She's not some tiny helpless child who can't function if her daddy isn't holding her hand 24/7. So he got distracted for a few seconds during a heated argument with his ex-wife and forgot about a promise he made over a decade ago to see a meteor shower. He fucked up, he apologized, she accepted it. That's normal, healthy conflict resolution.

I dunno, guys. Maybe we shouldn't normalize the idea of completely and permanently destroying relationships every time someone makes a mistake or disappoints us.

[angelasscribbles]

65 Poly Asks Part 4

Time for part four of these asks for polycules. I'm doing them in ten question increments.

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

I’m answering for my Bad Romance gang, obviously.

Are any of the polycule members aromantic? How does that influence their relationship boundaries and their relationship to polyamory in general? No. But Riley’s best friend, Hana is aromantic. They slept together once. It didn’t disrupt their friendship but it’s why Liam didn’t like her in the beginning.

Are any of the polycule members asexual? How does that influence their relationship boundaries and their relationship to polyamory in general? No.

Do any of the polycule members consider their relationship(s) to be queerplatonic? How does that influence their relationship boundaries and their relationship to polyamory in general? Nope.

How have their members’ respective family relationships influenced their polyamorous dynamics? I haven’t explored this in Bad Romance, but in Complicated, while they are navigating things, Drake finds out that his parents had an open marriage and it shocked him.

Were any of the members raised in a polyamorous family? No.

Are any of the polycule members parents? How many kids do they have? Oh, yes. Most of them at this point. Riley has five children. Liam is the father of two of them. Drake, Max and Rashad each fathered one. Rashad never wanted children, the youngest child (his) was not on purpose. He is around sporadically and has willingly given the role of father over to the men who are Riley’s nesting partners. I have toyed with the idea of either Liam or Drake having a woman show up with a child of theirs and see how that goes.

If there aren’t any kids yet, will there ever be? See above answer.

How would the polycule deal with one member wanting kids, but another member never wanting kids? It was never a problem because Rashad doesn’t live with Riley nor do they see each other daily or even weekly. His lack of wanting children didn’t affect her at all. Liam always wanted kids. Drake never actively wanted them, but he wasn’t opposed to having them.

If the relationship opened up after children were already in the picture, how was the change explained to them? Was it explained at all? This polycule was in place before any children came along. They have always had three fathers, it’s normal to them. Since Liam and Riley are the king and queen of Cordonia, this isn’t public knowledge and I have toyed with the idea of writing about one of the kids having issues with it as he comes of age and maybe isn’t super cool with not being able to acknowledge who his biological father is.

Do all members of the polycule raise children together, or are there designated “parent” members? The four members that are nesting partners (Riley, Drake, Max and Liam) all function as parents. They make no distinction between whose child is whose. They all parent but Max takes on the bulk of the child care, working from home, overseeing tutors and private lessons, making breakfast, etc.