#he defo took some time and wondered what the hell happened

[theefloraknight]

...no barren moon where he won't find you...

Loki stared at the ceiling, wondering.

Thor threw me- No, I let-Odin- No. I let go. Didn't I?

I was on Midgard. They were kneeling. No- i was kneeling. To whom?

Loki laid on the bed, breathing heavier.

The lights are too bright.

Why can't I remember? I wanted to rule Midgard. He wanted the stone. I wanted to be king, didn't I?

Why can't I remember?

Loki began breathing faster.

It's too loud. The lights are too bright.

I don't- I want, he tortur-

No. Why would it matter?

He wanted the stones. I wanted the throne. Didn't I? Isn't that what I told Thor in the Observatory? I don't remember. Why can't I remember? He told me-

I wanted to be free. I still want to be free. No I don't. Yes I do.

I had sisters. I don't have sisters. Yes I do, the cyborg and the Zehoberei. They aren't-

I'm his child now. Aren't I? Isn't that what he told me? I'm not Odin's- Odin wasn't my father. He isn't. Tha- No. He is not my father.

Did I...attack Midgard? That's what happened, isn't it? That's why I'm here? But I don't remember. I defenestrated someone, didn't I? No. Yes. The Man of Iron. Why can't I remember?

I miss Thor. I hate him. He abandoned me. How did he find me? I was falling...yes. And she caught me. The cyborg. She brought me to Father. She didn't bring me to Odin.

Why can't I remember?

Loki begins to grip the sheets, silently screaming.

Why can't I remember?

Why can't I remember?

WhywhywhywhywhywhywhyWHY.

Tears begin gathering in Loki's eyes, heartbeat quickening.

Why can't I remember?

Why can't I remember?

What happened?

What did he do to me?

Why can't I remember?

[neverhangd]

doing bits and bobs on the blog, obviously. rn i'm in potc hell (thank the gang lmao, s/o for dealing with me go to: @mvrtogg, @itismissswann, @norringtxn / @collectorofmuses), and i just realized that the majority of people who follow me may not have read this page (or even known it existed!), so i wanted to give two important bits of context!

1.) anne bonny walked so her archetypes could run.

i literally found out two weeks ago that anne bonny isn't stupid famous. whaaaaaat? but actually, that did shock me. maybe it's because i had two pirates phases and like research, but i've known a little bit about her since i was a kid: specifically, that she was a kick-ass pirate woman. i've learned a lot more since then, and i love to share it; i joined a group that i thought had a pirate phase only to learn that...they hadn't. and had no idea who anne bonny was outside of being a character someone before me had written as well.

it was exactly then that i realized anne bonny isn't a super famous kick-ass pirate woman and i felt like that one part of dogma. someone was trying to explain how my take on anne bonny both was and wasn't in-line with the previous writer's and it took me a while to realize they were asking what show or book i used for canon because they doubted she was the same character, despite sharing the archetypes. so. just so it's out there, here's an incomplete list of archetypes we can apply to the historical figure anne bonny, kick-ass pirate woman:

riches to rags (gave up a privileged life to marry a pirate)

the redhaired irish

girlboss/tits out for piracy (she would famously whip her shirt off in battle so men would know they'd been killed by a woman)

did it for love (left her first husband and became a pirate with her second)

it's a love story (whatever else they were, history tells us jack and anne were in love, even if i don't usually use that on this blog)

three's company, too (anne and read were absolutely an item at the same time as anne and jack)

ambiguously queer (i advocate for a bisexual anne, but the only lady-type lover she took was read, who can be fairly read as transmasc, putting some doubt on the full connotation of her orientation/s)

short fuse (she was known to fight over basically anything)

2.) what in the url?

since anne bonny isn't the kickass pirate bicon of my dreams--we'll get her there, one day!--it's relevant to also share what the fuck my url actually means. because she was a woman a pirate a woman and a pirate alive during the early 18th century, we actually don't have much record of anne speaking for herself. the most popularly known quote we have was spoken directly to jack rackham just before his execution:

if [you] had fought like a man, [you] need not have been hang'd like a dog. -A General History of Pyrates, Daniel Defoe

she said this to him because he and his men were the reason the ship had been caught and they had been taken prisoner and she took that very personally, as well she should! (it turns out that both anne and read were pregnant, anne by jack and read by their husband.) the larger thing is, she wasn't wrong: when the ship was invaded, only three people stood on the deck fighting: read, anne, and an unnamed pirate who presumably died in the struggle. everyone else was hiding below decks. read, in fact, famously fired TWICE down at the hiding men, killing one and injuring another.

the really wild part of all this, though, is the ending of anne's story. we don't know it.

anne's execution was stayed on account of her pregnancy, as was read's. read would die in prison from a fever, and presumably their child did as well; anne, on the other hand, simply...disappeared.

...but what is become of her since, we cannot tell; only this we know, that she was not executed. -A General History of Pyrates, Daniel Defoe (which, if you keep wondering why i'm referencing it, is considered THE source)

officially speaking, we may literally NEVER know what happened to anne. all we know is she NEVERHANGD.*

thank you for your time and attention! ♡

[silverhallow]

So... what happened at Bridgerton House when everyone gathered to watch the Oscars & then That Speech was given by Benedict? Plus of course, Kate going into labour as well 😂

Soooo Bridgerton House whilst Benophie are at the Oscars…

Violet was determined she was hosting a huge party regardless if Benedict was going to win or not… and regardless of the time difference.

She was so proud of her son being nominated though the whole drama with him being in love with Sophie and the whole pretending thing was a pain but she knew that whilst they were away they would sort it out… she was sure her son wasn’t that stupid…

Violet invited Alice and John over, Phillip had come over with Michael and everyone was gathered.

No one had any idea what Sophie was wearing for the awards and despite Kate’s messages Sophie refused to send her anything…

So when she came onto the screen, the camera panned to her and they saw her…

Colin dropped his beer all over him, Simon and Anthony both swore and were slapped by their wives despite both Kate and Daphne swearing.

Michael’s curse of “fucking hell Phil your sister is HOT” was heard over the gasps and then he quickly apologised to Alice and John.

Alice turned to Violet and said quietly “if that doesn’t work I don’t know what will…”

Kate smirked knowing the look of wonderment on Benedict’s face would be compounded by the news he got earlier… she just hoped that Sophie knew by now.

“Ben looks like he’s the luckiest man alive” chuckled Phillip “like he can’t believe she’s there with him”

��I mean I think a lot of men are wondering if they can lure her away” Daphne laughed “who knew she scrubbed up so well!”

“You saw her at Prom with Ben, Daph” Edmund said

“When we all assumed they’d get together or were together in the first place?” Francesca added

“That’s the one”

“I can’t believe they took this long…” Colin said, having wiped down his top from his beer and picked up the popcorn and began eating. “Like it’s so random… they were adamant even at Christmas they’re just friends… and now this… it is very odd”

Alice, Kate, Anthony and Violet all shifted and Phillip coughed but no one noticed as Hyacinth beamed and squealed “She looks like an Angel!”

“She does! Ben looks like he’s trying to be James Bond!” Greg laughed

“If Soph was a Bond girl I’d defo be watching” Michael grinned which earned him a slap from Phillip

“Dude, that's my sister!”

“And yet you’ve never called Ben out…”

“Cause he’s terrified of Ben” Eloise laughed and winked as she stole one of Phillip’s mini donuts

“And he’s older than me, and had never openly objectified her!!” Phillip said going bright red

“I’m not so sure… look at the dopey look on his face… he’s definitely not looking at her face” Kate laughed pointing at the TV and Benedict’s eyes were most definitely on Sophie’s backside “I mean I can’t blame him… if I was pregnant… I’d totally see if…”

“Kate, your husband is here, if you answer that question…” Mary said with a warning tone

Anthony laughed “oh Mary it’s okay. I’m aware Sophie out ranks me”

The conversation played back and forth as Benedict and Sophie made their way inside and all the Bridgerton’s could do now was wait.

As the film won some earlier awards they cheered excitedly and they started playing games trying to spot Sophie and Benedict in the crowd but with Sophie’s dress standing out it wasn’t that hard to find her.

Violet hushed everyone as the presenter for best director got onto the stage and they started with the nominations and everyone squealed excited when Benedict’s nervous face came on the TV.

Everyone held their breath as the presenter said “and the award for best director goes to…”

“Oh come on!!” Colin cried out

“SHUSH!!” Kate hissed

“BENEDICT BRIDGERTON”

The screams from everyone were gathered were insane, Violet was grateful they didn’t have neighbours as they definitely would have woken them.

Violet and Alice both burst into tears, Kate and Daphne screamed and jumped up hugging each other as Greg and Hyacinth began jumping around.

“He’s on the stage!!!!!!!” John called as Edmund by Turned up the TV for them to hear his speech

“Wow i’ll do my best not to swear here because I know my mum and the rest of the family are going to be watching and she’ll murder me if i swear on TV”

“Too right!!!” Violet said through sobs of happiness

“Crikey. I didn’t expect this. I know everyone says that but I honestly didn’t… I guess I have to thank a few people here… first of all to Henry for giving me the chance and offering me the job of a lifetime… my parents, and my small army of siblings back home, Ant, Col, Daph, El, Fran, Greg, Hy… you too Kate, thank you for your support and love… and yes all the teasing… but i think… The most important thank you has to go to the person who has never failed to support me, even when I didn’t know what I wanted to do, didn’t know who I was… my beautiful Sophie…”

Everyone squealed as Benedict said their names and Kate laughed and as the camera panned to Sophie Kate could see the conflict in her friends face as she had tears falling down her face.

But everyone Awwww’d so Kate couldn’t say or do anything as Benedict continued “we’ve been best friends since we were 4 years old, even when you were going through hell, you were the person I could rely on… you’ve always been my person and the person who encouragement me in everything, you were the one who shoved me into taking this job, you were the one who got me my first ever camera and we made that silly film with Bernard when we were 14… it was that moment I fell in love with you. I have loved you since that day and I will love you for the rest of my life. You are my soulmate and my everything and I would not be where I am without you. You are the kindest, most generous and purest person to walk this earth and this… this is for you… You are my world Sophie thank you…”

Kate and Anthony grinned at one another as Violet, Phillip and Alice gasped “did he… did he…” phillip stammered

“He finally told her?!” Violet gasped as they saw Sophie’s face on the screen for a brief second

“Yes! Yes!” Kate screamed happily “he FINALLY told… ohhhhhhhh”

“Kate…” Anthony said as he watched his wife freeze and wince as everyone paused looking confused as the finally comment but then in worry as Kate yelled in pain before pandemonium started as Kate’s waters broke right there in the middle of the Bridgerton’s family room.

Causing Colin to spill his beer on himself for the second time that night and end up covered in popcorn as Michael got such a fright he tossed it in the air…

Mary and Anthony got Kate to the hospital and at 3pm, 12 hours after going into labour, Edmund Benedict Bridgerton made his dramatic entrance into the world.

[yostresswritinggirl]

and, if Albedo have his own personal botanist, what about xiao have his own personal chef, or something like that? the reader working at wangshu inn as the chef or maid 👀 (this the request... If you want to make something from this absurd idea 👀👀)

Hehe I like your thought process, anon. Albedo and Xiao really just: 😏👉👉 *finger guns* 👈👈 😑 for having reader assistants in my masterlist huh.

Making this solely a personal chef/maid thing would defo make this response hella short so I added in more info and background just like I did with Albedo's, so I hope you guys end up enjoying this one too!!

It isn't an absurd idea, but I sure as hell made an absurd answer to it kek

Xiao's Devoted "Chef"

Xiao with a Reader who is not only his Personal Chef but assistant

Background (let's gooo)

The arrival of the Adepti Yaksha in Wangshu Inn was really something I've been intrigued about for a while now, but I won't make much assumptions here because his banner is coming and more info would be given to us.

Xiao had long since been residing in and spends a majority of his time in this Inn yet its owners, Verr Goldet and Huai'an, barely knows anything about the adepti or his lifestyle.

So on a sunny, quaint day like any other where calmness passes through the lands without worry, they expected the Adepti to resign himself to a moment of peace and rest too.

So color them surprised when they save the familiar silhouette of the adepti ascending to the top floor. Porcelain white skin and clear tank top glittered with fresh blood as a broken and bruised figure lays unconscious in his arms. The couple was thankful that there were no customers out and about that day, because it would be a disaster for an audience to witness such a thing. Also bad for business, but they'll hold that in at the back of their mind.

Skilled workers were quick to work with their seemingly extensive experience with such a protocol. As they tended to the victim, the Boss stayed behind to tend to and inquire with the Adepti. Yet such a conversation between them came out strained:

There were no visible wounds that require immediate medical attention but there was a look in his eyes that feels much more broken than anything they can fix. Verr's hands hover over him in an attempt to urge him to clean up his still bloodied form. His amber eyes that were usually sharp looks through a distance light-years away.

"Xiao," the woman started and the eyes snapped out of its reverie, subtly looking around to ground himself. "What happened? And are you okay?"

"Their- the parents died from a Hilichurl ambush, I was only able to save the child," his crossed arms gripped at his forearm in the realization of his utter mistake. "32 seconds."

"32 seconds?" The Mondstadtian offered a fresh set of hot towels he had taken, and he had flinched when he saw the carnage that stuck close to his skin.

"I was 32 seconds late."

Your parents were adventurers who brought you with them as big fans of traveling and nomadic lifestyle, no set home yet freely living by. You were in your younger teens and you'd clarified you had no other family to go to.

The death of your parents came as an obvious shock to your young self yet you grieved in silence and sobs, as the only person you trust hovers next to where you rest in silent contemplation.

Verr knows that look, and it was something she hasn't seen on the Adepti before. Of pure guilt and a sense of responsibility.

That night you rested surprisingly nightmare-free as your savior stands his ground next to where you rest.

Present Times

The couple had adopted you into the Inn family without a second's hesitance and you were thankful for them as you were to Xiao. You were no heavy expense or disadvantage and that made it all the more easier to adapt into your new lifestyle.

Despite no words or explanation, you were perfectly aware of the deeds your savior had done to save you and keep you alive, and with that you had sworn to serve him until the end of your time. A life for a life, equivalent exchange.

Coming into terms with being in Liyue and the Inn, your life choices were meddled with commerce and the importance of livelihood. You were young but your guilt of being under the care of such people forced you to take on any and every responsibility you can handle.

Despite your background you were expertly skilled with cooking. Your mother and father always taught you the importance of a meal for adventurers whenever you'd camped out. And your special touch on dishes that saves adventurers had drawn in many appetites.

Business boomed and the Inn wasn't just famous for being a temporary residence, but a sanctuary that offers tastes paired with the divine sense of Celestia. You became Wangshu Inn's Head Chef, with your sous-chef Smiley Yanxiao.

At times where Xiao is forced to make rounds to seize looming threats, he'd find himself picking fresh and healthy ingredients he'd find on the way back and present to you for new recipes to experiment on.

But you also pride yourself with a different title, or titles: The Adepti's Personal Chef, Tender of the Yaksha, Adepti's Devotee.

This title was emphasized by the Sigil of Permission sewn into an armband hanging by your right arm, something you proudly wear even beyond the walls of the Inn.

You found out the Adepti's favorite during your daily visit and breaks, usually done so by hanging out in the balcony with him with a brand new recipe you recently made and wanted to test out.

While he sat parallel to you, he eyed the transparent syrup and the gelatinous substance in the obvious curiousity he shows for all your new creations, silently awaiting your opinion by watching your expression: whenever you show even the slightest distaste, he'll pointedly ignore his curiousity and the dish altogether. And if you express such pride and achievement, his interest will get the better of him, if you haven't offered the dish quickly enough.

"What is this?" He'd finally ask after your delighted moans, indulging on your own creation.

"Mmm, Almond Tofu... do you wish to try it?" Without an answer he'd pick up the only spoon on the plate and tasted it himself. And just like that, he'd froze, eyes full blown in surprise and awe.

"Do you like it?" He can only hum in response as he scarfs down the plate by himself, chewing respectfully yet with a hint of vigor in every scoop. "It tastes... like dreams..." the way he looked at you, with eyes possessing such childlike wonder, you couldn't help but fall.

After that, Xiao had requested a daily plate/offering of it. It became a routine to the point that all workers heard of the favoritism and are encouraged to learn the recipe. But it's usually your dish that is served, unless special occasions calls for someone else.

There has been an influx of dormers and adventurers recently as citizens around Teyvat flock to the Liyue continent in hopes to watch the most extravagant celebration of the new year, the Lantern Rite Festival.

Your best efforts manning the kitchen together with Yanxiao took gruelling hours just to prepare for the dinner's first course even with hours of prep time available. Even both bosses had to lend some hands as your sous-chef can barely keep up with your stride. And after the dishes are finally distributed to the dining hall, you were already set in cleaning up the kitchen, and before you knew it-

"It has been an hour."

"It was a busy day, I'm sorry, Xiao." You could only muster a mumble in guilt as you kept your head down on the usual table, refusing to look at the disapproving expression he definitely wore, except he doesn't. His face has the slightest hints of worry and wonder at your deflated composure.

But his focus now was on the food he has been craving the whole day, already digging into his dessert. And you just tried your hardest not to fall asleep on the cold, wooden tabletop. Until your tummy rumbled through the silence.

A hum. "You haven't eaten?" You shake your head as you lift your head, gazing at the cute sight of your guardian tilting his head to the side in slight distaste for your lifestyle. You open your mouth to retort until you felt the cold utensil touch your bottom lip. "Here, I saved you the last bite. After this, get yourself a meal and retreat to your quarters, I don't want to hear any excuses." He softly urges a little push with the spoon so you get the hint, and you wrap your lips around it, chewing and gulping down cold dessert. He offered his favorite food, used the same spoon, and spoon fed you with it—

"Wha... don't- don't bite the spoon," you squeeze your eyes tight from the embarrassing thoughts in your head.

When people wish to have an audience with Xiao, most of the time they head to you for guidance after inquiring with Verr. They require a sigil of permission, and most of the times, your own sigil has been under fire a lot in their desperation.

An old merchant who desperately wants to hire the adepti to aid his caravan with personal security once tried to claw at your armband, but a split second after the tip of his fingers had touched the cloth, he was blown away to the nearest wall.

"What-," a pressure on your left shoulder pulls your other against a lean chest, protectively squeezing as a polearm materialized in front of you. You can feel the ragged vibrations of the Yaksha's unusually heavy breaths, his amber eyes sharp and dangerous, dilated like a predator.

"What gives you the idea that you had the authority to lay a hand on my assistant?" Black and teal embers conjure around you two as a dark shadow slowly creeps up from the ground. "That is their sigil of permission; I want nothing to do with you mere mortals."

If not for Verr and the other staff, things would have gone gruesome and unsightly for the business. Yes, business. Everyone disliked the guy enough to care more about the Inn than his actual well-being. When he'd come to, he was forced out of the Inn (he would have done so himself anyways as he was already traumatized).

"Sir Xiao, why did you do that?"

"He didn't have a Sigil, he was pretty much asking for it. And why have you gone formal?" You pouted at him and his only response was a quirked eyebrow. Walking over to stand behind him, you slowly wiggled your arms through the gap between his waist and slack arms, finding it easy enough with how thin his waist is as you wrapped him in a hug.

He tensed from the secretly ticklish feeling before letting down his guard in your arms. This was one of your leeway as his most devoted follower. Your constant exposure with the aid of the divine sigil has made you immune to the negative effects of Adeptal energy, enough to make him nigh worry about your safety around him anymore.

And him letting you hug him like this... let's just say it's from your mannerisms of comfort when you were still young and around him.

"Take an indefinite leave," Xiao broke the silence a few minutes after, forcing you to crane your head to the side to look at him. He meets your gaze with an amused glint. "You have no debt to pay here, you shouldn't be holed up in a place like this."

"It is true that me leaving wouldn't have majooor repercussions, but what's with the sudden idea?"

He huffs. "You're my only follower and yet you divide your attention serving temporary mortals that will pass by without remembrance. And besides," you tense at the sight of an upturn on the edge of lip, pearly whites subtly peeking, "personal does not mean sharing."

You were an adventurer at heart and it's time you indulge in that glorified life of excitement, with your guardian by your side. It was the only gift he can come up with for your undying devotion.

Holy - I had to cut this thing A LOT because I wrotE A HECKIN LOT WTF?! It's not even done in my mind, my goodness, there should be an adventuring unit here too but hhhh I got too conscious of the length sksksks I'm so sorry! P-Part 2-?

I enjoyed writing this a tad bit too much sksksks but now that the second to the last installation of this even is published, the next request should be the last one! And that means I'll have to stop the poll and start working on the requests for the 100 followers one! So if you haven't voted there, you should before it's too late!!

[vanilla-vivillon]

So since y’all seemed to like Kanej kid, let’s do Zoyalai kid. Also David isn’t dead in this because it is to sad

||ROW SPOILERS||

TW, this has brief mentions of infertility and describes labor, nothing to graphic just talks about how painful it is

After the wedding zoya and Nikolai were both excited to start a family

Nikolai; while he adores his sister Linnea and his father, never really was able to grow up in a loving household

He never wanted that for his children

He and Vasily had a horrible relationship growing up and he wanted to di everything in his power to make sure his kids had a healthy sibling relationship

Zoya on the other hand never really thought she’d have kids

Before everything went down she kinda assumed she’d work as a general and work to help Grisha

She never thought she’d have children

That obviously had to change

The country needed heirs

Zoya already decided that since she was probably gonna live a loooooong time, when her heir came of age she would step down; that way she wouldn’t love for a super long time.

Now that Zoya was gonna have children she wasn’t honestly sure about

What if they hold her back?

What if she gives up to many duties for them?

But higher the all these other worries she didn’t want to turn into her own mother

No matter how much Nikolai assured her that never will happen

Zoya still had worries

Zoya was a lot of things but motherly she was not

Nevertheless in February Zoya and Nikolai told there friends they were expecting

They were all incredibly happy for them

Tamar loved children although she herself didn’t want any and couldn’t wait to teach the kid things like how to ride a horse or shoot

Tolya objected saying the kid should be well educated on poatry and great works that way the Nazyalensky dynasty might be somewhat pious

Genya was hoping for a girl. Genya and David had there son Forrest earlier that year and Genya was already planning play dates

David was happy for his friends and had already started on projects for toys for the kid

When they wrote Mal and Alina they were ecstatic

While Mal gave tips on how to handle babies to Nikolai

Alina with her wiles and years of friendship with Zoya figured out all the way from Keramzin Zoya was worried

She wrote “Zoya babe imma cut to the chase, your nervous, your scared, your probably worried you’ll turn out to be a horrible mother. And imma tell you your not. Cause you’ve got an amazing freaking team. You’ve got Nikolai, Magnus, Linnea, and Genya and David, the twins, and of course myself. There’s no way in hell we’d let you turn out horrible to the kid. We’ve got you”

It helped Zoya a lot

She decided it was orphan wiles that Alina used to diagnose her exact problem from the letter she wrote to her

And Zoya did have wonderful people to help her

She wasn’t alone

Zoya had been trying to remember that more

Three months along Zoya was safely into Trmester two and it was time to tell the public

This was crucial to the monarchy

While zoya and Nikolai were popular

They needed an heir to convive people of the security of the nation

They made a public speech announcing the baby and Ravka went wild

If there’s one thing Ravkans know how to do it’s rally around babies

Letter came pouring in from name suggestions to old wives tales

They said Rosemary made the baby healthier

They said they should name there child Plumje

Well the Plumje comment was from some Kerch girl Zoya found strange but never mind that

The announcement was huge

The people had hope

Hope that wolves wouldn’t come knocking

Hope that there boys and girls wouldn’t be drafted

Hope for peace

While the people rejoiced Zoyas pregnancy was getting tougher

She had a easy enough first trimester but the second? That was rough

The morning sickness was bad

Her Healer; a no nonsense Fjerdan Women said that the vomiting wasn’t something that could be healed

And so Zoya suffered on

Zoya insisted on keeping her normal schedule

Her usual meetings with Grisha and the spy’s

Passive agressive letters to the Kerch

Aggressive aggressive letters to the shu

And trying to figure out whether or not there was a revolution group in the Wandering Isle

Zoyas schedule was already stressed and the baby wasn’t helping

Eventually her healer; Monika, put her foot down

“Your Magesty” She started “if you do not alleviate your stress I guarantee your pregnancy will be worse”

“Look Monika I can handle a little throw up”

Monika and Zoya attended the little palace together

While Monika was a healer and back then the animosity between corporalki and etherealki were high, they were friends

It was good to have a powerful healer in your corner when half the little palace hates you

And it was good to have a powerful squaller in your corner when your Fjerdan and in enemy territory

“Zoya you are endangering your child” Monika stated

By this statement Nikolai had enough

And zoya finally listened

Nikolai assumed some of her duties and Zoya started to feel a bit better

Her second trimester was stressful for there relationship

Nikolai had a hard time understanding zoya

And Zoyas fears started to grow

But they were a good couple

And they worked through tension before

Zoya opened up about her worries of being a competent queen with a child

She leaned on Nikolai more

And they worked together to fix the damage

By the end of her second trimester there relationship was healthier

And they thought the third couldn’t be as bad

In a way they were right

Her morning sickness while still present was significantly less then her second trimester

However I new thing arose

A question that everyone had been thinking

“What if the baby is Grisha?”

The Ravkans had accepted a Grisha queen

But a Grisha dynasty was another thing

Monika told them outright that the baby was probably Grisha

Being Grisha tended to run in families

And Zoya was fairly sure her paternal grandmother was also a squaller

The whole science of Grisha heritage wasn’t studied well

Most Grisha were in Ravka in the second army

And most of the soldiers don’t have children

Zoya also learned her new found ability to sense Grisha wasn’t fool proof

Sometimes she couldn’t tell at all

And in Genyas case of being somewhere between a corporalki and materialki, she couldn’t tell what she was

She also couldn’t sense anything in Forrest Kostyk

That meant they couldn’t rely on Zoyas power

Nikolai couldn’t help but think tracing heritage would be easier if he wasn’t a bastard

His mother’s line was easy

She was a Fjerdan princess so he could trace everything back from the very start

And from his mother not a drop of Grisha blood ran through his veins

His fathers got murky

Magnus didn’t come from nobility

He was self made

A self made orphan

So other then his father neither he nor Magnus knew anything about Grisha influence

Nevertheless they had other worries

Zoya was in her third trimester and was going to give birth any minute now

Zoya honestly didn’t think she would make it this far

And that has nothing to do with her fears of motherhood

Her own mother had four miscarriages

Pregnancy complications were common

Especially in Ravka where most couldn’t afford mediks

But now that the due date was fast approaching Zoya was in fact okay

Zoya can handle pain, she’s handled much worse

Labor was one of the least of her worries

The due date was October eighth

And on time and punctual Zoya went into labor during lunch

Nikolai joked it would be a good trait for a ruler to show up on time

However Zoya was in to much pain to think about a snarky retort

She had vastly underestimated how much this would hurt

The pain was blinding

But Zoya was strong enough to survive the fall

And so in 3:07 PM son October eighth

Prince Mycanae Juris Nazyalensky was born (prounounced My-kuh-nay-uh because I threw some random vowels together and made it a name)

Myca (My Kuh) for short

With a tuft of chocolate brown hair and beautiful hazel eyes he shone

Nikolai absolutely adored him

He would rock him and sing him lullabies

But mostly tell him stories

About the amazing Privateer Sturmhond

Of the allusive Juris

Of the little termite

Zoya in the other hand had a different approach to there newborn

When he first cried she was elated

Zoya didn’t hold back the tears of happiness and didn’t even swear the healers to secrecy after

Zoya was the epitome of

“Oh god it’s a baby, as I holding him wrong? Does he have the right clothes on? He’s so fragile and precious”

Monika had to tell her three times that Myca’s crib was fine for him and it wasn’t to hard

However the family’s elation was short lived

They were a family

But they were also the rulers of Ravka

And Ravka needed to see the face of there hope

Four hours after his birth Nikolai presented him before the nobility

Zoya still wasn’t feeling to great and Nikolai Insisted he could do it

This is what the Ravkans needed

The baby met stability

Met peace

For once in many years the people could lay down in there beds without fear

But to Zoya and Nikolai

There baby wasn’t a political tool

Or a savior

He was just a baby

A perfect

Small

Baby

This is what love does.

Im really proud of myself for accomplishing this. I worked really hard on it and to keep our characters in canon. My ask box is open and n do any Grishaverse asks

If this gets 25 likes I’ll do a part two 😉

I defo think Nikolai and Zoya would have more then one kid

Also I kid you not I couldn’t find any good names for the life of me so I eventually took a break and was doing my History homework when I was reading some old Greek thing and saw the word “Mycenae” and was like “Yeah I can massively mispronounce this and make it a name”

Here is part two https://dablackdahlia.tumblr.com/post/651104016423583744/the-black-dahlia

I also made a Kanej kid one here

[solar-pxwered]

A List Of Norman Reedus Movies/Shows I Have Seen And My Opinions On Them

1. The Boondock Saints

The Best. A classic. Bloody and inappropriate and if I remember my count correctly, contains 194 “fucks” or variations of it (this movie certainly illustrates the diversity of the word). Terrible Irish accents. A KICKASS soundtrack. Willem DeFoe crossdressing. Dropping toilets on people’s heads. Over the top action sequences. Cheesy dialogue. Campy as fuck. I freakin’ love it.

2. The Boondock Saints 2: All Saints Day

Some people didn’t like this one as much as the first one, and I admit that I wasn’t as fond of the new detective in this one as I was of Smecker...but, overall, I really enjoyed it and I drove 2 hours to see it in theaters. I love Romeo more than Rocco. The humor was on point. It was nice to see the original actors for Doc, Dolly, Duffy and Greenley. There was more terrible Irish accents, another KICKASS soundtrack, cheesy dialogue, over the top action sequences, still campy as fuck. I freaking love it.

3. The Walking Dead

Cannot even describe how much I love this show. I have ALWAYS loved zombie related shows and movies so this show was right up my alley from the very beginning all the way back in 2010. I watched it religiously every Sunday. I adore this roller coaster ride of a show and I especially adore Daryl, Carol and Jerry. This show has it all: Comedy, drama (hella lots of that), tragedy and triumph...and it never fails to pulls me in and hold my interest.

4. Mimic

Honestly, I saw this a LONG time ago and I hated it because...well, because I have a cockroach phobia, ok?! Don’t judge. Norman’s part was pretty small, not one of his lasting impressions on me.

5. Six Ways To Sunday

This is a weird one. It’s about an overly innocent 18 year (played by Norman) who gets involved in the Mob and develops an alter ego that’s violent and his complete opposite. There’s murder, prostitutes and good ol’ fashioned mother-son incest and it wasn’t a movie I suggest for the lighthearted or anyone with those sort of triggers. 

That being said, I watched the whole thing and didn’t hate it. It was just uncomfortable...as seems to be a theme with Norman Reedus movies.

6. Dark Harbor

This fucking movie...

Ok, so, I’ll be straight with you: I really enjoyed this dumbass movie. It had me guessing right up to the very end and it took me on a very strange ride along the way. 

If watching someone sexually feed a woman a poisonous mushroom, lots of dark eyed staring scenes or Norman Reedus making out with Alan Rickman is your thing, then go for it. 

7. Let the Devil Wear Black

It’s modern Hamlet. What else is there to say? If you like Hamlet, you’ll like this movie. If you like pre-car accident, baby face Reedus with the black hair, you’ll like this movie. I liked it.

8. 8MM

You know what the best thing about this movie is? Nicholas Cage. He steals the damn show no matter what movie he’s in and no one can even deny that fact. Norman’s part in this one is pretty small too but I liked this movie anyway because...well, Nick Cage. Enough said.

9. Bad Seed

I honestly can’t remember how this movie ends, all I remember was that it wasn’t at all how I expected it. I liked this movie because it’s a psychological thriller and that’s my most favorite genre of all time. The movie’s premise is a guy suspects his wife of having an affair and comes home one night and finds her murdered so he goes after her lover (Reedus) to try and kill him because he believes he was the one who killed her. It’s a cat and mouse chase sort of thing...now I need to rewatch it because I can’t, for the life of me, remember how it ends.

10. Gossip

Ok, no JOKE, this is the best movie I ever randomly discovered and I can’t believe how many people have never heard of it! It’s got some big names in it (Lena Headey, Norman Reedus, James Marsden and Kate Hudson to name a few).

It’s a psychological thriller/mystery drama in which three friends start a rumor at their school as a social experiment for their class. The rumor grows, however, and suddenly it’s out of their hands and spiraling out of control. People start getting hurt, reputations get dragged through the mud and then it escalates to the point of someone losing their life. The three main characters {Reedus, Headey and Marsden) try to figure out the truth behind the out of control rumors and discover more than they ever imagined, or ever wanted.

I HIGHLY recommend this movie. I really, REALLY do. The ending is one of the best twists I’ve seen in a LONG time.

11. The Beatnicks

This movie is so weird. It’s like...it’s just really weird. It revolves around two beat poets who find a magic box that somehow magically helps them get good at being poets but it’s like...an evil box and so they decide to only use it once and then get rid of it. Yeah, it’s a weird movie. Not my highest suggestion.

12. Blade II

Ok, if you’ve never seen the Blade Trilogy then I just don’t even know what to tell you. 

My favorite of the three movies, Blade 2 gives us the glorious Reedus character of Scud, the pot smoking, horrible-shirt-wearing, mechanical genius and Blade’s sidekick. Not only is he precious and adorable, the movie in all is enjoyable and has a fun rave-esque soundtrack. 

The one thing I hate? *SPOILER ALERT* Scud’s scummy betrayal.

13. Tough Luck

This is another one of those movies that I liked but it’s just so freaking weird. 

It’s a psychological drama where a down on his luck con artist, Archie (Reedus), tries to rip off a carnival worker and gets caught. As punishment, he’s hired to work at the carnival  to pay off the debt. He gets involved in a scheme to murder the owner’s wife, but falls in love with her in the process.

Things go to shit. He gets the short end of the stick. More plots and lies develop. It’s all twisted until the end and the answers fall into place.

I really like this movie, it’s one that I kept and still have my copy of. 

A word of warning though, never leave this movie on your movie shelf for your father to find and watch while you’re away at college, resulting in your mother calling you and asking you why you have such a nasty movie. Because the sex scene at the end is OUTRAGEOUS. I mean, it is the FUNNIEST fucking sex scene I have ever seen in my life and I can’t ever watch it without cringing and laughing. My mother, however, didn’t think it was funny at all and my father was too shocked to even form a sentence.

I highly suggest this trippy as hell movie.

14. Octane

Ok, to be fair, this movie is actually alright, although Norman’s character gets the shittiest death possible. I mean, imagine dying because some psycho vampire kisses you and bites your tongue out. That’s one shitty death.

But, overall, this is a good thriller. Johnathan Rhys Meyers plays the villain and he’s always pretty quality. The story is basically a teenager has a disagreement with her mom and gets picked up by this drugged up, blood sucking, vampire wannabe cult and indoctrinated joining them. Her mother joins up with a tow truck driver (Reedus) whose daughter was also kidnapped years ago and who has been hunting the cult down ever since. 

It was a cringe filled, yet interesting, movie and I didn’t hate it.

15. John Carpenter’s Cigarette Burns

This is John Carpenter....OF COURSE I liked this one. 

I won’t say what it’s about because that would ruin the story, but it’s part of an anthology and John Carpenter loved Norman’s role so much he STILL talks about it today and suggests Norman to people in the industry.

It’s a good one if you’re into horror shorts or anthologies or the genius of the legend that is John Carpenter.

16. A Crime

I had completely forgotten about this movie until I started making this post, but now that I remember...I REALLY liked this one!!

This is a pretty sad one, but it was very good and Norman’s acting in it is absolutely wonderful. His character’s wife was murdered and the suspect was never found so his neighbor, who really likes him, creates a fake culprit so that he can finally get some closure. 

This is a good one. I suggest this one if you’re in the mood for a strange sort of romance movie that has underlying thriller tones.

17. Moscow Chill

I remember watching this one, and I remember enjoying it, but I honestly can’t remember anything about it except that it’s a Russian film in which Norman plays a computer hacker who gets hired to hack into a Russian bank and gets caught and put in prison. But I honestly can’t remember what happens in detail.

If you like foreign movies with hacking and subterfuge plots, then give it a try because I do remember enjoying it while I watched.

18. Red Canyon

This one is kinda fucked up. Imagine Daryl Dixon mixed with Breaking Bad mixed with Deliverance and you’ve pretty much got the story...

A brother and sister return to their mother’s hometown to settle things and put their horrible past behind them...but upon returning they end up reliving the nightmare all over again.

It’s a good thriller/horror watch, but there are scenes of sexual violence so if that’s not something you can handle, then don’t watch this one.

19. Hero Wanted

This. Is. A. GOOD. Movie.

Cuba Gooding Jr. is the lead and he does an AMAZING job. Gooding’s character is a garbage man who falls in love with a girl who never takes any notice of him. To get her attention, he stages a heist in which he is supposed to jump in, save the day, and win the girl...only the heist turns out to be real and he is shot and the girl is also shot in the process. He sets out for revenge and gets in way over his head.

Norman’s part in this isn’t very big...but HOLY SHIT, was it impactful. His character didn’t have a lot of screen time, in comparison to a lot of other people, but he had a solid backstory and reason for being involved and MY GOD did I cry about it. This was actually the first movie of his I watched AFTER discovering Boondock Saints and it solidified my love for his acting abilities.

A very good watch. Highly suggest.

20. Messengers 2: The Scarecrow

This one is pretty ok, actually, as far as lame horror movies go. 

The plot is simple: Blonde, beardy, corn farmer Norman gets slowly driven insane by the haunted scarecrow in his field that he thinks putting up is a good idea for some damn reason. He starts to get more and more violent and rapey as time goes on until his family is forced to take up arms against him.

It’s not bad. Second part in what I THINK is a trilogy? I’ve only ever seen the first two. If you like horror movies then this one is a good watch. As I mentioned though, there is an attempted rape scene in this one so just be aware.

21: Pandorum

It’s an alien movie. Astronauts run into a species that is stronger and hungry for tasty humans. Shepard (Norman’s character) doesn’t make it out alive. If you’re not in the mood to see Norman get LITERALLY gutted or other characters get nommed by aliens, then don’t watch.

If you ARE, then go ahead and watch, because it was pretty alright.

[archived-gtronpa-account]

Ok ok hear me out, Shuichi having 2 calm down a borrower after they’ve been caught by Kokichi

I'm,,, wheezing,,,

Alrite if the borrower is so scared I'm assuming this is going with a villainous Kokichi? That's not my fave trope but I can go with that

Mmmm maybe maybe gimme a sec,,, ohhh okay I got it here's what I'm thinking:

Shuichi knows something weird is going on in his apartment. There's odd supplies and bits of food missing, since he lives alone then there must be something or someone stealing all rhat. Obviously it can't be rats or some run cause they wouldn't steal pins and bottle caps, it has to be a someone. But why steal those things and such small quantities of food? Is someone toying with him? He checked with his neighbours and no one reports hearing or seeing anyone intrude in his apartment. So it's safe to say Shuichi is really creeped out but also very, very intrigued

Eventually he makes his lil investigation and the best conclusion he comes to is that it's one of those tiny thiefs he's read legends about in shady websites. It sounds really stupid but it's the only fitting conclusion, besides, does it matter if it's so carzy? Not really. His life is already so stressful he needs some wonder and fantasy, so he just goes with it and starts jokingly believing in the little people in his walls, sometimes outloud saying stuff like 'Hey right now I'm not in the kitchen so if you want to get some food now the coast is clear' or 'goodnight little people or person have a safe stealing trip' and 'by the way little people if you need anything just tell me okay? I'm leaving the cupboards open I bought some groceries today hope that'll be good enough'. He doesn't believe that one second, but he finds it really fun and a nice way to escape from stress, thinking there's someone listening to him.

Though, he does tell Kokichi about the weird occurrences in his apartment and jokingly mentions it could be tiny thiefs. Kokichi takes that much more seriously and takes it as a challenge and a game to understand what's going on at Saihara's place.

When Shuichi is gone, Kokichi lockpicks his door and gets in (Saihara already knows about his lockpicking, and Kichi even snuck in to surprise him a couple times, so it's alright) and coincidentally (more like by the power of scriptwriting ease) the borrower is out borrowing at that time.

Pif paf poof! Kokichi jumps at the little fella before he can get away, plucks him up in a fist and sticks him in his pocket and leaves like the thief he is. No more problems for his friend Saihara.

Now, I think Kokichi is the type who always wants entertainment. Either he'll be the one entertaining large groups and people he's keen of with his antics, or pushing the buttons of those he finds boring. Going further with this to make him the villain here, he'd be curious about the weird lil guy he found but also think they'll be too weak and boring if he doesn't mess with them.

He'd defo enjoy manhandling the hell out of the lil borrower at first, playing games with it and making it do tedious parkours n stuff or hang them where they can't move a muscle, like those little rain doll things Japanese people hang to their umbrellas and elsewhere for good weather? Yea like that. Nothing to actually physically harm the lil guy, but he'll push them to their very limit and keep them weak and exhausted.

Oftentimes he'll 'forget' to lock them up at night and make them think they can escape, only to catch them at the very least second, 'It's a lie!' and yoink them up and lock them again or sleep with them trapped in a loose fist. It happens many times and each time the borrower knows it's a trap but tries anyway, and each time they get caught they despair more and more.

The times Kokichi actually tries to act like a pure villain is when he's interrogating the borrower. Who are you, what are you, why were you at Saihara's place, why do you hide and steal... Etc etc. He does that dark face thing and brings a finger down on the borrower's torso gently pressing on it taunting them. It's pathetic seeing them pinned down and struggling to fight even one finger.

Needless to say, Kokichi's fun is hell for the poor borrower. Plus, being already super afraid of humans, their experience with Kokichi is borderline traumatic.

Meanwhile, Shu notices the little stealings stopped. He's kinda sad about it and still talks to his walls like 'hey little people are you still here? Hope I didn't anger you or something please come back' but ultimately doesn't dwell on it and keeps his focus on more important matters.

One day he needs to get back something he lent to Kokichi, who's lot home. He needs it really urgently so he just uses the spare keys kichi gave him (yea I'm just assuming they're that good of friends) and quickly goes in his room to get it, but as he's leaving he hears a weird little sound, something like a whimper. For a second he thinks Kokichi is hiding under his bed or something but the sound seems like it came from his desk. He gets closer and inspects it and sees a flash of movement from a drawer that's cracked open. His curiosity is piqued and he takes a look in...

And finds a terrified little guy.

Shu's mind short-circuits for a second, unable to process the scene before his eyes. It gets worse when the weird tiny person speaks 'Why you- why are you here? Did K-Kokichi let you see me?'

Shu is super taken aback and stutters a quick no, and sees the little person scoot back, fear clear in its eyes. He realizes he looks like an intruder or a thief.

'Ah- I don't want to hurt you! I'm kind of lost here though, who are you? Why are you like this... And in Kokichi's drawer?'

For a moment, the tiny person doesn't speak or look at him in the eyes, deep in thoughts and reluctant with fear, but then they speak.

'Shuichi, y-you have to help me... Kokichi kidnapped me- I don't want to be here! Please help me!' and despite seeming terrified of Shu, they seem desperate.

Shu is now 10x times more lost. The situation is as confusing as a dream, but what matters at the moment is to help and reassure the scared little person. He's really not sure what to do, but first it'd be good to get them out of that dark and cramped drawer and go back to his place and try to figure things out.

He doesn't really know if he can grab the lil fella, so he takes his cap off and lets them climb in then holds it up to his chest to hide the tiny guy while he walks in the streets. He's not the best at comforting but he does mumble a few apologies and reassuring words to let the tiny person know that everything is fine. It's a little unnerving for the borrower to hear Shu talk to them again like he used to- except this time, Shu knows they exist. Either way, it helps bring some comfort.

Shu bumps into Kokichi on his way out and freaks out, but tries to keep his cool.

'Saihara~ did you need something at my place? You should have called me you know? It's very rude to go inside people's houses while they're away, also super illegal. Gasp! Did Saihara finally succumb to the temptation of crime?' his tone is teasing and playful, but there's something of an edge to it, and his big, bright smile seems too forced to be genuine.

'ah, yeah but it's alright I got it now-'

'what are you hiding in your cap?'

Meanwhile the borrower can hear shu's heart pound too fast, or maybe that's their own heartbeat. They don't want to be caught by Kokichi again.

'Nothing- really, I just took it off since it's a little hot outside'

'you say that while wearing a hoodie? Saihara would never ever take his cap off! What are you hiding?' his face goes blank and serious. Before he can be stopped, he reaches for the cap and tilts it to see the tiny, shaking fella inside.

Now, Shuichi isn't the confrontational type, but the tiny person just looks so terrified and pitiful, all shaking and wide eyed. He smacks the hand reaching for tiny person harshly and brings the cap and the tiny fella closer to his chest, then sneaks another hand in to brush against their toothpick-like arm in reassurence. He frowns and tries to question Kokichi, but the shorter guy takes the lead and speaks first.

'oh, I see you found my little friend!'

'i would hardly call them your "friend" seeing how scared of you they look'

'aww, so mean! They're scared of everyone, not just me! Besides, you should be grateful, Saihara, I got rid of your apartments's problem and fixed them! Now you can be sure they'll never try to mess with you again. Ah, but if you want your problem back, I don't care. They were too boring anyway' his tone is venomous, and there's a finality to it. Just like that Kokichi walks away, whistling a tune like he'd just been talking about the weather, that seems so over the top for him that Shu gets the feeling he's pissed but is hiding it. Shuichi really wants to grab his shoulder and stop him to confront him, but the shaky person clinging to his hand is more important at the moment.

He goes back to his apartment in a rush and carefully sets the tiny person in his bed since it's the most comfortable surface and the poor little guy seems exhausted. He's not really sure what he should do so he leaves to the kitchen to make some tea and clear his mind.

He goes back to his room and can't find the small person! He freaks out and starts looking for them- but then a thought pops in his mind, he remembers how he'd thought there could be little people living in his walls, and it just clicks that if the person knew his name and somewhat trusted him then maybe, as crazy as that sounds, they could be the little thief in his walls?

After a moment of thought, it doesn't sound that crazy after all. Shuichi sighs and sets the cup and thimble of tea on his desk, then looks around the room and thinks of what to do in that situation.

'Um,' he feels self conscious, talking to the walls again but knowing this time that there's someone listening, 'i know you're really scared right now, I would be too if I were you. I'd probably be even more scared than you- I know I would never have trusted some giant stranger to hold me and help me get out of a bad situation, that was really brave. So, uh... Thank you for trusting me back there, I'm glad I could help. I don't really have the right to ask that but... please, don't be afraid of me. If you don't need my help anymore then I'm really happy, but it would kill me to know if you're hiding while you need help. I know I must look really scary to you, really really scary, but I promise I only want to help. So, um, please don't hesitate to come if you need anything.' he exhales and feels his face flushing. The words sound cheesy on his tongue, but he is being as honest as he can be.

He doesn't expect it to work though, so when he sees a tiny head poking from behind the pile of books on his desk, he feels the tension in his limbs evaporate and a warm feeling blooming in his chest. Being so shy, people don't think he is reliable, so he's glad to see someone so scared of him still put some trust in him.

The borrower takes a few steps closer and nods 'alright'.

Then there's a bit of an awkward silence as neither knows what to do next. Shu remembers his old plans and carefully pushes the thimble closer to the little person.

'ahh, i made you some tea. It must have gotten cold now though, sorry. Do you want me to hear it up again?' and he leaves to do it, stops at his bedroom's door, thinking that if he leaves the little person again they might try to run off, but he pushes that thought away.

He's gals and relived when he gets back and finds them sitting in the middle of his desk, nervous but present nonetheless. He feels too intimidating and large and monstrous so he kneels on the floor to be more at eye level with the tiny person.

'we can talk if you want, or we can just be silent. Either way is fine with me' he doesn't want them to feel pressured, poor little thing already seems too scared and fidgety. He's afraid to loose whatever silver of trust they have in him.

The borrower is silent for a while, sipping at their tea and stealing a few glances up at their old bean. Living alone, their bean had been their only company. Not to mention that he was so nice when he talked to them in the walls, not even sure someone was listening. It had been unnerving, but also a nice change from the constant silence and loneliness. The borrower feels a bit more at ease and slowly opens up about what happend and who they are.

They're a little quiet, stammer a lot and speak so fast most of their speech doesn't make much sense and is hard to follow, but Shuichi patiently listens anyway, until their words slowly fade to small sobs and quiet sniffles.

Shuichi's heart tightens at the sight. He doesn't know how to comfort a crying person, but he has to be there for them, so he slides a finger on their back and rubs it in gentle motions. He doesn't do anything more and lets them decide whether or not they accept the gesture, thinking the touch may discomfort them. he just doesn't want to overwhelm the poor fella.

Shuichi is usually the one to rely on others, the role of a strong and supportive person is foreign to him so he's bit at a loss for words, but he does clumsily promise he'll protect them and make them happy.

(shoot! This got much longer than I planned but eh, at least I kinda like how it turned out it was worth spending a while on)

[danetobelieve]

Genesis (Flashback) || Lucas and Winston

Flashback ~3 years

Lucas was desperate. It burned under his skin to the point he had a fever right now and was feeling sick. Lucas had finally recovered from his injuries a few months ago and eventually left his bed a handful of weeks ago. Emotionally, mentally-- he was still exhausted. Two days ago, he had seen the posters and heard on the news that he had been listed as missing. Miles wouldn’t stop looking for him, he knew it, and Lucas battled not crawling home and just grabbing him-- begging to not let that happen again. But he wouldn’t. The house was familiar. Even the scent of the small gardens, and the aged scents of people passing by had his chest clench. This had to be a bad idea. Could his old friends be trusted not to tell Miles or the police? Wiping his forehead, wincing when his hand rubbed the scar on the right side, he walked around back. Taking pathways, he could find blindfolded and peered around the corner of the building. He didn’t hear anyone right away, but as he patiently listened, someone was home. Wanting some anonymity in case they yelled, he knocked on the back door with a few raps of his knuckle. 

College was over for a bit, Winston’s parents and siblings were attending an atrocious family party in florida for a great aunt that Winston had managed to avoid by virtue of the fact that it was supposed to be finals week. So they had the run of the place, they had been enjoying their new found freedom away from the college dorms. It was nice to really have some privacy and they had even thrown a house party. They had just been in the process of cleaning the remnants of the mess from their kitchen when they heard a knock on their parents back door. Heading back, they moved outside and saw a face that they immediately recognised. An old family friend, which meant that they had been over to the Dane house for dinner enough times with one of their siblings. “Uh …..” they were pretty sure that this guy was missing, and for some reason here they were, “ … can … can ... can I help you?” If they wanted to work for the police then this was the sort of thing that they were going to have to get used to, right?

Fuck me. Wrong one. “Hey,” Lucas scratched his arm, staying in the shadows, probably looking shady wearing a hoodie pulled up when it was nice outside.. A thousand things flew through his mind after he muttered the one word, and the instinct to flat out run was powerful enough to thicken thin hair on the edge of his knuckles. “Sorry to bother you, Winston.” Lucas peered around the yard, seeing old memories overlay the grass. Laughter echoed, and he sighed. His gaze drew back to the Winston. The scent alone of someone he knew was comforting; humans always had this rich mixture of their day lingering on their persons. What they ate, if they sprayed a fragrance, or if their laundry detergent contained a unique scent-- but also, just uniquely them. How did a wolf explained how impactful such a thing was? To immediately comfort him without having to do anything? “You’ve always been pretty bright, I’m sure-- you have seen the news. May I come in. I-- really need some advice.”

“Hey … Lucas,” Winston was sure that there was a manhunt going on, “it’s cool. You’re not … bothering me.” Not entirely true but whatever. Winston had watched their father and their older brothers Nathaniel and Theodore join the search for Lucas. They’d helped a little but they were busy with college and their parents were adamant that they keep their involvement at a minimum. But despite that they had always liked Lucas. They’d been friends with their brother Nathan throughout his childhood and growing up Lucas had always been decent to Winston, not like all of their siblings friends. “Yeah … uh … you can defo come in and I can make you a drink or some food if you need it, Nate, he isn’t here right now. Everyone’s kind of out of state and I don’t know when they’ll all come back…” they weren’t sure whether they should be calling the cops, “but … come in and uh … we can make you some food and I’ll see about the advice.” 

A deep inhale filled Luke’s entire chest cavity, and he held it while Winston spoke. Maybe there was a little faith in them, that they wouldn’t exclaim loudly and give Lucas a moment to explain. “Thanks,” he moved around the back, peering around a few times, pausing on the threshold to listen as far as he could just in case he had been followed-- or someone was lurking around. Not feeling completely safe, he walked through the door seeing the lingering mess of a party that brought a soft huff in amusement to it. How wonderful-- all college students should relish those moments. “I, I’m actually glad you are the one here, you always have made me feel--” Lucas didn’t finish the sentence, and began to close the blinds without thinking twice about it appearing weird. “I’m, probably going a little crazy--” he muttered loud enough to hear, before sitting down, running his hands through his short hair to scratch his scalp to pull his hood back to better reveal his face. “I’m-- fuck, I’m really scared. Now I came here, and what if something happens to you-- I should go.” 

Whatever the hell was going on here, one thing was very clear to Winston and that was that this guy was really really really scared. Lucas didn’t exactly look great either. Like they had been living in hiding for a while. It looked as if they hadn’t seen the sun in a while and they looked thin and gaunt compared to what Winston would’ve normally recognised. “Uh, it’s cool don’t worry about it.” They glanced around their back garden and nodded to themselves when they were confident that there was no one out there and there was no one watching them. They didn’t know why they felt the need to check that, but here they were anyway. Lucas started speaking and Winston could see that they clearly in some shit. They wished that their dad was here. He would know exactly what to do. “Listen, calm down,” they pulled a glass down and filled it with water before handing it over to Lucas, “drink that and take a few deep breaths.” They paused before continuing. “Whatever is going on, well we can help, you know my dad’s a cop, we’re safe here. It’s a good neighbourhood and everyone around here knows my family, besides there’s a shotgun hidden in the house and a few other guns that my parents have collected over the years. We can take care of ourselves. Just calm down, what’s going on…?” Winston was nervous, they weren’t really well equipped to be dealing with this and it felt somewhat surreal telling someone their senior that they needed to calm down. 

A distorted laugh broke past Lucas’ lips. It curled his spine forward, and he chuckled darkly to himself as this human could have so much protection. Did any of that really matter to what was actually out there-- he was so stupid for coming here. Thinking the cops could help? What if the cops were the very people who figured him out? Who thought he was living too normal a life with the rest of humanity and deserved a permanent rest? He reached out, patting Winston’s forearm when they brought over the glass, and then gripped it slightly.  “I actually don’t think you can help me,” he chuckled again, not sure why he felt the need to laugh when the tears caught in his eyes were fine to remain there over falling. “Sit, what’s after me can’t be stopped by your dad. I can’t explain it well--” His head ached suddenly, and he leaned forward to lay his head down on the table, folded in his arms. “I don’t know how to explain it to you without scaring you-- I came, cause I just wanted to see someone, anyone really. Maybe- to say goodbye so at least one person heard it.”  

Frowning, Winston shook their head gently. They reached up and fiddled with their glasses, adjusting them left to right before sliding them back into their original position. Perhaps an all in all unnecessary habbit. Swallowing, they felt the grip on their forearm and wondered if they had made a mistake here. Lucas was obviously in trouble, but Winston wasn’t sure that there was anything that they could do. They wished that an actual responsible adult was here. Turning, they walked away from Lucas, pulled down a second glass, filled it partially with vodka they had left over and passed it back to him. “I think you probably need something stronger then water,” they said quietly before taking a moment to think, “I don’t know any of what has happened, but you look scared. For now, nobody has worked out where you are. I can try and help you find somewhere to lay low for a bit and then when my parents are back we can take you to the police.” They paused for a second and shrugged. “You might as well explain it because I’m scared as shit right now.” 

Lucas could hear that he was freaking Winston out and he felt terrible about that. “Sorry-- I’m sorry--” The smell of vodka took over the shared space between them, and though he took it, Luke didn’t drink it. Swirling it around before setting it on the table. Hearing that people were still looking for him made him grateful for those people, but he also wished they would stop. At least he’s done a good job so far, of course hiding in a basement for a year while he healed up wouldn’t provide any results. “I can’t be alive right now,” oof, he winced at the words, biting his tongue. “I know it feels easy to go to the police, and I wish it could be-- and I’m laughing cause I came here because it was exactly what I thought I needed. The fact everyone is gone-- including your dad? What are the chances? I finally get the bravery after a year, and then they’re not here?” He shook his head. “A group of people are really after me.” His hands trembled a little and swallowed hard, “they, won’t stop until I’m dead for real this time.” 

Pausing, Winston considered the situation that they found themselves in. As Lucas finished their story, they took the bottle of vodka and filled themselves a glass. Unlike Luke they swallowed their vodka, most of it in one go. The bitter burn of the alcohol trickling down their throat brought Winston back to their senses and they found themselves realising that they were probably in too deep. They would’ve assumed that this was just another prank if they hadn’t seen the news and been a part of the search. “Stop apologising,” Winston said quietly, “I’m trying to think.” They didn’t see any other option other then calling the police. “Look, I know you’re scared, I don’t understand what happened to make you think that this is some way of the universe telling you that there is some reason for you to not be involved with us or get help, but the police are the only people who are going to be able to help you with this. Fuck maybe the police aren’t enough, ah fuck this is serious, fuck fuck fuck…” they weren’t sure that they were the person who should be helping, but here they were. “You need to call the cops dude,” they said passing them their phone. 

Lucas couldn’t help but apologize over and over because this wasn’t a burden someone young like Winston should be dealing with-- dammit, he wishes Nathaniel had been home. Guilt started to ache and throb in his throat. His eyes glanced down at the phone, and rose up from the chair. A meaty growl rumbled low in his rib cage, a thunderous sound that vibrated through his chest cavity like a damn storm. His hands clenched, before releasing. Hearing Winston repeat themselves, and just seeing how freaked out they were. Lucas realized how stupid he was involving other people he knows. Because he’s surrounded himself with humans who didn’t really know anything about him. How could he explain properly? Go into detail what he was, and what that actually means about the world? He gritted his teeth, a faint snarl to his lip as he turned away. “I don’t know if the people who want me are in the police too. I don’t know who they were Winston-- they shot me up and put me in the ground.” He didn’t raise his voice at all, seeming like he was making up his mind. “I have their attention, maybe, I can convince them I’m leaving town. Your good with the internet right Winston? Maybe you can help me leave a fake trail?”

Shaking their head, Winston sighed. “Look, just because there might be elements of the police that are involved, and that is a very big might, because there’s never been any clear evidence of anything then the occasional bout of incompetence from some of the older members of the force, but you have no idea that they are in the police.” The mention of getting shot up made Winston want to ask them to leave, but they remembered every time Lucas had ate dinner with them or stayed over or come to a cook out or any of the other things they’d done and Winston knew that they couldn’t condemn them. “Sure, you have their attention, you could try and convince them that you’re leaving, I can photoshop you into landmarks and raise anonymous alarms mentioning sightings of you. But have you not considered how cruel that is. Nathaniel and your family, they’ll take this as evidence you’re not here anymore and they’ll go after you. You could just go to the authorities instead, they could put you in witness protection until all of this blows over and everything gets better.”

It was cruel, and Lucas would pay for it every day in misery. He knew Nathaniel and Miles would travel out and hunt those leads and he knew that might actually be the best way to go about it. If everyone appeared like they didn't know where he was-- the hunters won't suspect them hiding him. They will leave them alone. He needed to hide for real. To disappear, go missing-- stay dead. Until everything gets better. Lucas’ heart swelled for Winston, and this part of them was why they were one of his favorite people in town. Maybe it would one day. Lucas got on his knees, throwing every ounce of pride away and letting it all wash over him as he kneeled in front of Winston. "I'm begging you. It won’t happen any other way. I'll do anything to lead them away from this town. Away from my brother-- my family, now you. I'll stay in town and just wait a few years, hide, just-- stay out of sight. I'll tell the police when I can, I swear. Please-- please... I don't want anyone else to know. I don’t want to actually have to run away. Please--" 

Winston frowned. They had never been a position like this. Seeing someone that much older then them. Someone that they’d known growing up. Nathaniel was a few years older then them and he and his friends had always been cooler then Winston would’ve ever hoped to achieve in social status. It never bothered them but there was a schoolboy awe to it. Now seeing them prostrated in front of them asking for help and Winston wondered how they could possibly deny aid from their friend. Nathaniel and Miles would certainly not understand. Winston didn’t know Miles well at all, just via association, but they were sure that they would want them to do everything that they could to help Lucas. “I can do it, but only if you’re sure that this is the only way, and I don’t mean like you are tonight, no one is going to be back until the weekend and I don’t think you were followed. It’s thursday now, if you’re sure about this, I’ll do it tomorrow night.” They couldn’t believe that they were agreeing to this. In the moment it seemed beyond ludicrous. “I just, you have to be sure, because there are so many ways we could try and help, but I can’t force you to go to the police even if I wanted to and I don’t want to make things worse.” 

Lucas wasn’t listening or realizing this was a bad idea, and instead felt ready to try to implement it. He was a bit delirious right now. Having been bound to a bed and basement for the last year, has made him a little out of sorts rationally. However, he finally had some kind of plan which was more than he had all year. Lucas wasn’t going to change his mind, and he sighed in relief, the weight on his shoulders pulled off a little bit. “I don’t have a phone-- I’ll get a note to you with the answer,” he stood up, clenching his hands. “I-- thank you. I didn’t mean to put this on you, if you want out-- to just forget about this and not be involved, you tell me too okay? I don’t want you to feel bad or guilty-- I don’t want that.” Lucas didn’t have any idea how this would play out. All he knew was that if it went south the two paths were death or being chased. He was a werewolf, he understood a hunt better than most species. He’s felt the burn of it, the excitement, and the satisfaction of a kill. Lucas didn’t want to be on the run forever, and he didn’t want to drag his family into running too. “Okay,” he pulled up his hood, tucking his hands into his pocket and walked towards the back door. “I’ll get you something to repay you, even if you say no-- I’ll figure something out. I really owe you--” Lucas turned around, offering a sad sorta smile. “Bye Winston.” And left. 

[holycalum]

vex c.h. 

word count: 3.8k+

warnings: mentions of pregnancy, swearing, drugs refs, but it’s actaully not bad at all

summary: the one where calum’s the most™ annoying but it’s cus he’s in looooove (is tht enough??)

a/n: HI yeah i know i haven’t posted in years because um (: i’ve been the most busy ever. i have so many things i wanna post i have like million half written things and ideas i just don’t have the energy to finish or start i know its bad i miss writing. anyways i hope ya like it i know i suck at writing the good ending parts where the stuff happens but i’m trying. send me requests pls it might take a while but ill defo get to them! love yall the most!

“can you please shut the fuck up and stop chewing ice for like, five seconds?” “first of all, i have an iron deficiency, calum.” you sneer, “you know i’m sensitive about it.” “you know i don’t care about your blood iron content, right (y/n)?” calum glares at you, angrily sipping his drink. “maybe you’re pregnant.” you almost scream, “stop don’t say that,” you pat your stomach, “i don’t want to be pregnant.” “cal, it’s your turn to bowl,” ashton says, flopping down next to calum on the couch opposite you. “i don’t wanna fuckin’ bowl,” calum grumbles, crossing his arms and sinking back into the couch. ashton scrunches his eyebrows, “cal, it was your idea-“ “(y/n) should take my turn, maybe it’ll help her unborn child be a champion bowler.” he mused, making ashton do a double take. “honestly,” ashton squeaks, “i don’t wanna know, (y/n), are you pregnant?” “thought you didn’t wanna know?” you joked, placing two hands on your stomach. “no, i’m not, calum’s just being a bitch.” “m’ not.” he counters, “it’s just your pregnant lady hormones are rubbing off on me, i’m surprised we’re all not crying.” ashton just sits up slowly, backing away from the couch. “it’s just, fuck you calum.” you roll your eyes, leaning back into the couch. you turn your body away from calum, focusing your attention on the scoreboard. “you’re doing really badly.” “can’t show up your bowling prodigy child,” calum hardly misses a beat, as annoying as he was being, he was on fire tonight. “wonder who the dad is.” you pull at your hair, “oh my fucking god,” you want to throw a bowling ball at his head, “it’s like you want me to be pregnant, you’re insinuating i’m getting dicked down enough to be pregnant.” “big word, gotta set a good example for the baby...” calum trails off, trying not to laugh at his constant pestering. “are you?” “wouldn’t be your business if i was, or if i wasn’t.” “then who am i to believe you’re not pregnant,” calum shrugs, finishing his drink. calum’s neck looked like prime real-estate for your fists, you had never been so annoyed with him in your time knowing him. for a while you two were actually friends, but as of lately, he seemed to seize any opportunity to push your buttons. michael slid into the spot next to you, “yanno, boys are usually mean to girls when they like them.” he whispers in your ear, “doesn’t that promote an unhealthy association or something?” you roll your eyes, burning holes into the side of calum’s head. “i’m sure someone who likes you wouldn’t claim you’re pregnant every chance they got.” “calum’s not just someone,” michael sing-songed, “i honestly don’t know what sticks up his ass.” “apparently it’s not a stick, it’s my fake baby.” you crossed your arms, still glaring at calum. “ashton,” you piped up, gripping the back of the drivers seat. “can we please stop at mcdonald’s, i have to pee.” “no.” calum answered for ashton, “i recall asking ashton,” you snapped your head towards him, “but go off i guess.” “yeah.” ashton said quietly, switching lanes to get off at the next exit. “no,” calum grabbed the steering wheel, “you peed like 20 minutes ago.” “jesus fucking ch-calum please,” ashton threw his hand off the wheel, “don’t kill us please.” “wouldn’t wanna kill the baby,” calum grinned at you, sarcasm leaking from his dimples. jesus, you think, here we fucking go. “since when are you the dictator of my bladder?” you asked, face red. “peeing a lot is a sign of pregnancy, you know?” calum said, ignoring your question. “so, you’re an ob-gyn now too?” “i’ve taken up many practices since you conceived your baby,” calum insisted, eyes glued to his phone. you desperately wanted calum to turn his head towards you, to give you his full attention. this half assed argument wasn’t cutting it. “i’m honestly so uncomfortable, we’re almost at McDonald's.” ashton announces, “i am not fucking pregnant!” you shout, slinking into the back seat, “why do i even hang out with you?” “hey, (y/n), how you feeling?” luke asks, face grainy on your phone screen. “like ass,” you croak, you’d been throwing up all morning. you thought you were on the come up, and tested the waters with a piece of toast, but you were unsuccessful. “-is that (y/n)?” you hear calum ask, and your stomach lurches, you didn’t need to deal with him right now. “yeah-she’s sick,” “with what?” “i dunno, she’s throwing up-“ suddenly the phone screen shakes and calum’s face takes up the whole thing. his face holds an evil smile and you’re far too familiar with his jokes and you know what you’re in for. “you’re having morning sickness, (y/n).” he says matter-of-factly. you feel the last of your toast threatening to inch up your throat. “it’s cus’ you’re pregnant.” you empty your stomach into the toilet, “fuck you, calum.” you manage in between deep breaths. “i have food poising.” “if that’s what we’re calling pregnancy these days.” “i’m hanging up.” you throw your phone across the tile of your bathroom, leaning your head against the cool toilet bowl. you felt so gross, and calum’s comments were not helping in the slightest. you felt like crying really, he was being such a jerk to you, for no reason. a few fever naps later, you’re woken up by a knock at your front door. you drag yourself to the door, opening it to find a bag from the drug store, with a note reading ‘pregnancy kit!’ you immediately toss the pregnancy tests to the side, digging out the gatorade. you call calum, “thanks for the gatorade, but i don’t need the tests, wanna give them to your groupies?” you say as soon as he picks up. “ah,” he breathes, “of course, how could i be so silly, you don’t need to test something you’re already sure of.” “fuck off.” “i don’t need them,” he continues, “that’s not me anymore.” “ok, bye calum.” you throw your phone back onto your couch, dropping the bag next to you. if he wasn’t such an asshole, you’d think him going out of his way to bring you things would be sweet, but you’re sure it’s just an extra step he took to tease you. if he were anyone else you might smile and blush at the thought, but thinking of calum’s devilish smile while picking things out only made your skin crawl with heat. “(y/n)...” calum pushes the drink out of your hands, “you can’t drink while pregnant.” you nearly break the bottle over his skull, “are you like deprived of sex or something? is that why you’re so edgy?” “i just care about the well being of your baby,” he rests a hand on your stomach, “seeing that it-speaking if we should find out the gender soon. seeing that its father is absent.” you flick his hand off of you and ignore the way your heart speeds up when he touches you. “let’s find you someone, that sound good?” you ask, dropping his calloused hand from your grip, and scanning the bar for anyone that may peak calum’s interest. if you were being honest, the conflict between you and calum, that you dread, lit something within you. whether it was a match under your ass that kept you on your toes, or something warmer in the pit of your stomach, you found yourself red in the face and tingly every time you went back and forth with each other. calum was pissing you off and he knew it, he had wiggled his way under your skin, and you didn’t know how you felt about it. you spot a blonde girl across the room, and you set out to approach her. “no one that’ll take away from my ob-gyn practice,” he shouts as you walk away, stomping loudly. it almost hurts how ok he was with it. you return only a few minutes later, finding it very easy to convince a random chick to talk to someone in a band. “calum,” you stand in front of him, and he glares down at your smaller frame. “this is ally-allison-um, this is allison.” you introduce her, and she giggled loudly. “oh my god,” he drops his jaw, “you reincarnated michael jackson? for me? you’re too sweet, (y/n).” something inside you relaxes at his dislike for the stranger. “what?” allison cocks her head to the side, looking calum up and down. you catch yourself thinking, me too girl. “never mind,” you mutter, “allison said she likes music, you like that too!” “yeah, i go to a lot of raves.” she assures us, “have you guys ever done molly?” “no.” calum is short, “well, i have a few in my bag-“ “nice,” he responds, “we can do a couple,” “yeah for sure,” his eyes are in slits as soon as he looks at you, you shrink under his gaze. “let’s do molly, in some bar, with ally.” “allison.” she corrects, and calum already has your bicep in his hand, dragging you in the opposite direction of allison. your brain is split between wanting to punch him for being so rough, and letting him drag you along. you go with the latter. “we’ll be right back, ally, just need to converse with my colleague.” calum has no intention of ever speaking to her again, anyone named allison, he decides. soon, you’re standing outside the bar, shooting daggers out of your eyes at calum. if looks could kill, he would’ve been dead hours ago, and you’d be beating the dead horse. your feelings were all jumbled up, in a hot, flaming, pile of trash. “it’s cold,” you complain, rubbing your bare arms. “ok well, i can’t control the weather.” he snapped, making your stomach drop, he was being so mean. “what the hell is your problem?” “i don’t need you to meddle in my love life, (y/n).” he uttered, pulling out a cigarette from his back pocket. you snatch it away from him, and he’s left empty-handed. “not good for you,” you explain, “i’m not the pregnant one...” “no one is pregnant!” you shout, throwing the unlit cigarette on the ground. “sounds like something a pregnant lady would say,” calum hasn’t missed an opportunity yet. “i literally need you to stop,” you beg, shaking his shoulders. he lets out a quiet ‘woah’ but doesn’t do anything to stop you from violently shaking him around. “i don’t know what your problem is, but like, you’ve been at this since before i tried helping you out, so what gives?” calum only shrugs in response, eyes drifting to the people flowing out of the bar. his mind sails elsewhere, wondering if the guys would wonder where you two went, if they knew how he felt, if they cared at all. “cal, there’s gotta be like, someone in there for you, if you want a wingman-“ you babble, trying to push the idea of you and calum far, far, far, out of your brain. if he could just make out with someone, you could never think about him like that again, and then you could really get pregnant, and live a calum-free life. “there’s no one in there for me.” he says coldly, turning his shoulders away from you, making your arms drop down to your sides. you can feel him closing off. you roll your eyes, “how are you supposed to know that,” you soften your tone, you didn’t really know how to talk to calum like this. “cus’ i just do,” he’s slowly inching away from you now, trying to increase the space, trying to decrease the connection. “why should you care?” he turned his difficult feelings into coldness. “you’re my friend, i think, if you’re allowed to be so involved in my uterus, i should be allowed to try and get you some!” you fume, stepping closer to him. “i’m trying to be nice while you continue to be so mean.” “why try?” “i-“ you didn’t know, “i don’t know.” “well,” he barks, “if i’m being so mean and you can’t stand it, why do you hang out with me?” “why are you so mean?” you ask, both of your voices raising. “i don’t know.” he mocks you, “you have to know!” you were being far too dramatic for where you were, but you were so blinded by rage you found it difficult to care. “if you’re allowed to not know why you put up with me, i’m allowed to not know why i’m mean to you.” he turns to walk away from you, you grab the sleeve of his jacket, blood pumping rapidly. “don’t walk away from me, calum, that’s rude as shit.” “i am rude as shit.” “you’re not!” you cry, people walking out of the bar into the cool air taking a second glance at your exchange. “you’re not rude and that’s why i’m confused as to why you’re being rude to me, you weren’t like this before.” “before you started going out on dates and shit and getting pregnant,” he grumbled, shoulders slumping into himself. you gaped, “how does that have to do with why you’re being mean.” “m’ not mean.” his voice got quieter, head now lowered. if he couldn’t just box you out he could always try retreating into himself. “you just said you were,” you matched his volume. “m’ not,” he repeated, “n’ there’s no one in there for me.” “you’re all over the place,” you’re head is spinning, and you can’t connect the dots between anything calum’s saying. “cus’ the only person for me is standing outside the fuckin’ bar.” “have i ever told you, you have such a way with words,” you were trying to be so cool, because you doubted that the middle-aged businessman standing near the entrance was the one for calum, but he was making it really hard. “you’ll never guess what i do for a living.” he jokes back, but his chuckle ends too short to be real. “ok, so, why do you think i’m pregnant? like i’m still lost.” “can we please not talk about it,” he begs, finally looking at you. your stomach flips at his eye contact, and as wobbly as your knees are, you’re unmoving. you couldn’t “that’s not fair to me, cal.” “just not here then, please.” the sound of your front door closing was the first thing to break the agonizing silence between the two of you. “so...” you lean over your kitchen counter. calum rubs his face, and groans. “it’s stupid,” his words are altered by his cheeks being smooshed against his hands. a blush creeps up the back of calum’s neck and onto his face. he wasn’t getting out of this one. “yeah,” you agree, “it is stupid, but why?” there’s a long stretch of silence, “cus i like you,” finally cuts through the thick air surrounding you two. “m’ still a little drunk.” you spit out the sip of water you had just taken. “sorry,” you sputter, wiping your mouth. sure he had implied something of the sort outside the bar, but hearing him say it was sending you elsewhere. “i um,” “you don’t have to say anything back, but you wanted to know, so i told you.” he shrinks into himself, “no, cal, i just wanna know why you thought that was how you should’ve gone about it.” you weren’t saying you didn’t feel the same, but you also weren’t saying you’d let him off so easy. “i’m sorry, if it really bothered you.” he says instead, spinning himself back and forth on the bar stool. he was looking everywhere but you. “it’s not that, it was just-“ “weird?” “yeah.” “i know id be weird anyways, so i figures being mean weird would rule out yanno, me feeling things.” he explains, playing with the cuff of his jacket. “oh,” you whisper, studying how his eyebrows scrunch when he can’t button his sleeve. “you can’t just try and cancel out your feelings...like pemdas.” his eyes flicker towards you, “wrong, i did try, it just didn’t work.” “so you still like me?” you ask, “do all pregnant people ask this many questions?” he says under his breath, and you let yourself laugh because it’s kinda funny. calum smiles sheepishly as he continues looking down at his sleeves. “just me i guess,” you decide to play along. “yeah, i do.” “cool.” “that’s all i get?” he sits up straight, gripping the edge of the counter. “it’s cool!” you defend, giggles escaping your lips. “yeah well, what’s cool about it?” he tests the waters, maybe you were interested, maybe it wasn’t so crazy to think maybe you’d like him too. even just a little bit. he leans back against the chair. “i think it’s cool...” you trail off, biting your lip, “that someone so cool likes me.” “you think i’m cool?” calum’s tone is teasing, but you can tell he’s flustered by the way his usually low voice raises a bit and the blush painting his tanned cheeks. “mhm.” you nod slightly, the little bit of alcohol in your system making it hard to hold off. calum’s stature was especially enduring right now, his soft, sleepy eyes and messy hair, your heart swelled at the sight. “cool.” he said simply, eyes crinkling. you only let out another quiet ‘mhm’ in response, taking another sip of water. “so, is that it?” “is what it?” “is that all we say, and now i just have to stare at you until you kick me out?” he questions, face dropping. surely, he thought, you were only playing him. “bold of you to assume you’d even wanna stare at my face that long.” you counter, raising an eyebrow. he thinks for a moment, “bold of you to assume i wouldn’t.” “bold of you to assume...” it was getting really hard to go back and forth with calum now, his cocky smile getting under your skin instead of on your nerves for once. “bold of you to assume i’d kick you out,” “oh?” he grinned, leaning over the counter, mirroring my position. he widens his eyes at you, “better get used to it then.” “are you flirting with me, calum?” “bold of you to assume i’m not setting you up for the best pregnant joke of all time.” you roll your eyes at him, starting to move away. he grabs your hand suddenly, pulling you back over the counter. “i was only kidding, (y/n).” “figured,” you squeak out, trying not to faulted. you swallow hard, “but why do you need to be so close to me?” you were certain if anything was obvious is was the prominent blush splayed across your cheeks. you’d be surprised if he couldn’t feel the heat radiating off of your cheeks. “like seein’ you blush,” you were right, “sure, i could see it from down the street, but this is a better view.” “doubt it.” you bite your lip, “agree to disagree?” “turning down an argument?” you question, “i’m sure another opportunity will present itself.” he whispers, “you know i’d stay here, but it’s a really uncomfortable position.” you speak, after a moment of silence. “and i hate being in jeans. are you spending the night?” “what does that have to do with being in jeans?” he stays leaned over the counter after you stand straight again, and start walking towards your room. “i don’t have any clothes for you, i’d feel bad if i was comfortable and you weren’t.” “not something you’d ever cared about before, doll.” he spins around to face you, relaxed against the stool. suddenly your whole body feels hot. you gulp, “i guess you’re right,” you come back later, clad in pajama shorts and a long sleeved shirt. calum’s lounging on your couch now, feet kicked up on the coffee table. “glad you’ve made yourself comfortable.” “you weren’t going to,” he speaks, eyes not breaking away from his phone. you sit down next to him, legs folded underneath yourself. he glances over at you, a smile smile evident on his lips. it felt odd, not being genuinely angry at calum for more than an hour. “listen,” he speaks, “you don’t have to kick me out, i can leave on my own.” he looks down at his hands, twisting his rings. “you can if you want,” you say softly, covering your yawn with you hand. you hoped he didn’t want to leave, cause you’d be ok if he sat on your couch forever. “do you want me to?” he meets your eyes, you shrug, inspecting your nail polish, “don’t care,” “i mean, it’d be kinda weird if i stayed cus i like you and you don’t-“ “i like you calum,” you cut him off, darting your eyes back down to your nails. “oh,” he shook his head a bit, a grin creeping its way onto his face. “glad that’s out of the way,” you say, still not looking at calum. if you looked at him it’d be real and you’d given into him, who was bullying you for a fake pregnancy only hours before. it was stupid if you put it that way. but if you thought about it another way, it was never really that deep. “then, i guess i’ll stay?” he says carefully, nudging your thigh, eyebrows raised in anticipation. “cool.” you nod, making eye contact for a split second before turning back away. you could combust then and there. “you’d like that?” he teases, inching closer to you. you swear you feel your heart stutter. “if i stayed?” “mhm.” you laser your focus on your chipping polish instead of his body heat in attempt to calm yourself down. but you’re the furthest thing from calm. “ok,” he huffs, leaning back and throwing an arm around your shoulders. you stiffen under his touch, your entire body on fire. as of the last couple of months you’d been hot out of anger, not by whatever this was. calum’s gaze was fixed on you, his eyes fond despite his cocky manner. “you gonna relax, sweetheart?” the nickname dripped like honey from his lips. “you gonna kiss me to get it over with already?” you spit suddenly, wanting to end the awkwardness. you were sick of the jitters now, and all you wanted was calum. yet, you slap a hand over your mouth. he let out a laugh, “can’t with you so far away from me.” you roll your eyes, and lift yourself to turn yourself toward him. “much better,” he grins, moving a hand up to cup your face. fuck that, you think, grabbing the collar of his shirt and pressing your lips together. you feel the tension leave your body, as calum’s lips work against yours. it feels like heaven, his plump lips against yours, hands gripping whatever they can. calum pulls away, forehead leaning against yours, panting quietly. you take in his look, eyes closed, blissed out, beautiful. “bet your baby daddy couldn’t do that?” he jokes, smiling. “shut up.”

[alliebruns-blog]

Races, Recces and Adventures for 2019

First off SORRY FOR NOT DOING BLOGS (to the 3 people that read them)

2019 has already been quite the year. Let’s get the excuses in, shall we? I have finally moved out of London to lovely sleepy Somerset – home of the Mendips, hills and lots of cows. The running here is ace and I feel like I have finally shaken off the horror of 23 years in London. But it’s a big change – the first month I felt like I was on a different planet – then I had to find work (you know that thing that actually pays you?) So I took a step back from internets for a bit. 

Another reason for lack of bloggage. It seems I have been writing them for everyone else but me this year. For some reason my inbox went a bit mad and I’ve been asked to write pieces, blogs and interviews for a Bulgarian Travel and Adventure Magazine (apparently I am going to be on the cover?!), Run Deep, Precision Hydration, Lessons in Badassery, Dure, Red Bull and Trail Running Magazine. Plus, I have to do my day job. And look after 4 dogs. And a 9 year-old (not mine but sort of is mine now….) and a man human. Jokes. He’s looking after me. 

 So what’s been going on? EVERYTHING HAS. 2019 started with BBR trotting over the The National Running Show in Birmingham where we had a stand and I gave a couple of talks. I was I the throws of a horrendous depressive episode and had to attempt to put a face on. I still wasn’t over Panama really. I think it took me about 3 months to get over it in the end. I had to do a talk on a panel about mental health and running (oh the irony) and then my own talk about running across deserts, jungles and that.

It was very difficult attempting to inspire people when I actually felt like a piece of shit. The show itself was ace and weirdly we have been asked to come back – but more on that a bit later.

I got out in January and February to do a couple of reccees for White Star Running. The weather was JOKES bad. 60mph winds and rain made for a very interesting trot along the coast.

We were checking the route for Septembers Run Jurassic races which are going to be amazing. Have a look at what’s on offer here - and rest assured that it shouldn’t be weather like this on the day…..

Then came the first race of the year - Larmer Tree Marathon in Dorset. Lest gusty with 40-50 mph winds making for another interesting run, and it was also Pickle the ultra dogs first official marathon – she loved it. Look at her little face! 

Then it was off to Bulgaria to do some talking about running. Myself and David from the Bad Boy Running Podcast were asked to go and do a talk at a running expo they had there and it was MEGA fun – defo returning nest year to do the 100KM ultra they are organising – it’s BEAUTIFUL in Sofia.

Back home and it was off to Rat Race’s Ultra Tour of Arran for the second year. 62 miles over 2 days with “some” elevation (A LOT) and some demons to slay. As you know I did NOT enjoy this last year - my fear of heights and ledges almost got the better of me, but this year was different. We had about 10 Do-Badders with us and some of them were first time ultra runners, so I felt a bit like I had a duty of care to them.

As part of my role with Rat Race, I did a little talk to people about the Bucket List which was great and I managed to get round the course with the whole squad without crying. Only issue was I ended up with an eye infection that meant I couldn’t wear my contacts. This is not recommended on mountainous trails. I fell over 3 times - my knee looked like someone had gone at it with a rifle. It really knocked my confidence for trails and I have been super careful ever since. I really hate falling over.  

Arran was beautiful and epic as always. I cannot recommend this race enough. Its otherworldly out there. Here are some pictures – the weather was so kind to us. If you get booking it now it’s pretty cheap – or even better register for a rat race season ticket and it sort of pays for itself! 

Next up was London marathon. It was my sixth year and I wasn’t looking forward to it having only just really moved away. I used to love this race, but I had done so little in the form of road running I was dreading it a bit. So I decided to spice it up by running it in reverse to the start and then running it the right way round.I need some night running experience for later I the year so why not?  I also wanted to raise money for my old friend Scott who we lost to suicide last year. If you want to give a few quid, the charity has been set up now and you can find it here.

We got up at 12am after 3 hours sleep and got our stuff together – we were running with a couple of friends starting at Birdcage walk. We decided on a 5-6 hour time as I had the real thing later on, and this was a training run ultimately. That didn’t go to plan and we ended up smashing out 20 miles in about 3 hours – meaning as we came into Greenwich everything was shut. ARGH! I need coffee! I’ve never waited for a Macdonalds to open, but that day I did! We decided to march out the last 6 miles as we had the time and my legs were already staging a protest about the relentless road pounding they were getting. Once we reached the start we headed over to a hotel on Blackheath where my amazing friend and Head of Crew™ was staying.

We had the BEST BREAKFAST EVER and got I got changed into fresh kit and then it was time to do it all over again. I forgot how much waiting about there was at London. I think I stood in the pen for about an hour, little legs seizing up, feeling cold for once. London is usually boiling. I took a minute to look around at the people running. Lots of them were doing their first and only marathon. Some of them made me want to cry. I saw a guy dressed in a bin bag looking nervous, fiddling with his headphones. He has  a message scrawled on his arm in sharpie – obviously written buy one of his kids. It said “I love you daddy and I am proud of you”. He kept looking at it. It made me want to cry. Sometimes humans can be wonderful. I bumped into the legend that is Anna Mcnuff in my start pen. She wasn’t wearing any shoes. Brilliant. She’s running the length of Britain barefoot so was a training run. I had SO MANY QUESTIONS but she seemed very cool about the whole thing. She really is relentlessly cheerful, that woman. 

 Then we were off. I felt pretty good considering the fact I had already done it once that day. As always there were huge crowds and bottlenecks and I was running a lot faster than I had done in a while. You can’t help it at London. You kind of get swept along. I was very wary of eating and drinking – I hadn’t eaten much during the night run and I am used to picnics on ultras now. I tried to take it easy but it felt easier to run at pace so I did what felt good. For once I wasn’t wearing a pack and it’s amazing how much that frees you to go a bit faster. I was relying on the water stops for all my hydration and that worked. 

One of the things I really noticed about the marathon this year is the aggro. I am so used to the chilled nature of trail runners that I totally forgot about what happened in New York. Road runners can be total arseholes. There were points when I ran over to the water station, signalling I was doing so, only to be physically bashed on the shoulder by other runners and told to “move out of the fucking way”. When I take water I tend to slow down, walk at pace, finish the water and then run on. It’s pretty obvious. I walk close to the edge so people can pass me. I’m sorry but people need to have a bit more patience. Fucking idiots. ANYWAY I managed to finish in a pretty OK 4 hours 10 mins. Getting out of the mental finish area was awful as always, and I had to meet up with a couple of people because my personal hell wasn’t ending there. I had signed up to help out on a Rat Race private event for the next two days and needed to get to Richmond to drive up to Cirencester. No boozy celebrations for me! So off I went to work with 300 bankers who were out on a jolly for 3 days running, cycling and kayaking 165 miles along the Thames. Wednesday came and I had never been happier to see my bed! 

Turns out road running smashed your body up a lot – especially 53 odd miles of it. My back was killing me, my legs hurt. So I did something I am not very good at – I had a bit or a rest. A few days off, runs at the weekend, went to physio. And then, two weeks later, it was time for The Ox Epic.

This is one of my favourite races of the year. Set on the Rushmore Estate in Wiltshire, its a whole weekend of camping and running courtesy of White Star Running. You can choose what race you do. Theres a 10km in the dark, a 10km in the morning, a half marathon and a 50 miler. So what did I choose? I CHOSE THEM ALL. Last year I managed to accidentally win the Epic - this year was a different story. This was a training run for something much bigger.

Once again White Star pulled it out the bag - a beautiful weekend and everything went like clockwork for me and him indoors, despite the fact we had all four dogs on site plus a 9 year old to look after. I managed to keep the same pace for all the races and not feel broken, plus I had a really nice weekend! We ran some laps with the dogs, some without, took out time at the aid stations, walked the hills and ran the flats. All in, we managed to get 76 miles in the bag over the weekend and finished knowing that we could do more. It was a chance to practice fuelling and hydration and catch up with old and new pals. Highly recommended and I will definitely be back next year - perhaps with my eyes on the prize again.

Pretty much everything that I have done in the first part of this year has been pointing towards my one A game race of the year which is happening this weekend (18-19 May). The Climb South West Devon Coast to Coast Ultra. I signed up last year on a whim. It’s 117 miles from the south coast to the north coast of Devon non-stop. This is the furthest I have run without a break, so it really is a huge deal to me to get through it. We’ve been out and about doing a couple of back to back weekend recees to see what the route is like. It’s self nav and we will run a lot of it in the dark. It runs along the Two Moors Way, across Dartmoor and Exmoor, through some horrendous terrain. There are a lot of muddy bridleways, fields and hardly any markings.

Elevation is mental – it literally feels like your going up hill all the time. It’s a really important race for me because it’s one I am not sure I can do. I have a plan A. B. C and D in place but I can’t see myself finishing in under 39 hours. Will I finish at all? Dunno. Stay tuned I guess….

So yeah, a lot has gone on so far this year, and there are some awesome plans in the pipeline for the rest of the year. 

Adventure time! AGAIN! 

I am resurrecting my position as Rat Race Test Pilot for 2019-2020 and doing 4 big recees this year, as well as pretty much all the events.  

June sees me travel to Spain for the Sea to Summit test pilot outing. The highest mountain in mainland Spain is 80km from the coast. Our route connects a start line on a beautiful beach on the Costa Tropical to the summit of Mulhacen (3482m) via a tough 2 day running route, giving 2 marathons back to back and nearly 4000m vertical height gain. No biggie. Plus it’s going to be BOILING and we start at 2am to try and avoid the sun. This is Ben Nevis twice in a day. Fun. 

August sees me trotting off to Malta for The Maltese Falcom. There are 3 islands that make up Malta. This ia a full traverse of the island chain. 3 disciplines. Run across Gozo. Kayak to Comino. Swim from Comino to Malta. Run across Malta. Hot. Historic. Warm sea. An island totally geared up for Endurance sport.  And all in one day. Another world first. 

In September I am off to Scotland to do something I have always dreamt off. A full coast to coast traverse of Scotland on foot. This is a west-coast-to-east-coast outing, n foot, over 6 days. The difference here is that Rat Race have devised a route that encompasses crossings of water and the use of some rivers and lochs, for which we will carry and use pack-rafts. This very unique route means we will hike or run, get to a body of water, use the raft to cross it or traverse it and then carry on by foot. An insane format in a simply stunning setting and incredibly remote area. The route goes from a starting location at Mallaig to finish just north of Inverness. This is the wildest country in the British Isles. We will be vehicle supported for some of the outing; and then self-contained (pack on back) for a significant portion of the rest. Almost 100% off-road. And in September. Be kind, weather! 

October I will return to Scotland for a multi day traverse of the Outer Hebrides. Another dream event. It is around 150 miles from the bottom to top of this rugged island archipelago off the West Coast of Scotland. We will attempt this journey over 6 days. We’ve not quite worked out the logistics on this (have I not learnt anything from Panama??) But I am SO EXCITED TO DO IT! 

In November I am travelling back to Namibia to crew for the Race to the Wreck event. That means I get to see the beauty of the desrt from the crew vehicle with a bit of running, but most importantly, it means I get to encourage, help and inspire people to complete the crossing. I would like to thank Rat Race for constantly believing me and allowing me to do these awesome things. I am one lucky piglet.  

Also here’s a thing – if you fancy joining me on any of these funtime recees then you can – just drop me an email here for more details. 

I am also doing a few other things in between mega adventures to keep up the training and fly the flag for Rat Race and White Star. There’s the Dorset Invader Marathon, the Man Vs Series, the Run Jurassic Series, Ultra Tour of Edinburgh, not to mention my first Threshold event at Race To the King. Basically it’s BUSY. But I am happy. And that’s the most important thing. 

Finally – big announcement – Bad Boy Running are thrilled to have been asked to curate a new section at The National Running Show 2020. We have been given the honour of curating the Ultra Zone – a brand new zone that focuses completely on Ultras. We have our own stage, our own guests and our own talks and panels, We are in charge. We will be announcing out line up in the next month or so but if I were you I would get your tickets NOW because you DO NOT want to miss this. You can get your free ones here using my code AMB18. We have some of the biggest names in Ultra running confirmed and it’s going to be mega. You can register for your free ticket here. Massive thank to Mike for believing in us (and trusting us – he may regret this….)

I’m also going to try and bet better at this blogging thing – I have a lot to write about so not short on material – it’s just the time. Having said that I am happy to write for anyone else that fancies it. Just drop me a line and I will take a look at it. So yeah. That’s it. Whirlwind update done. See you next week. If I survive.

[sambart93]

Fullmetal Alchemist Live Action Movie [Rant]

I finished FMA:B anime like LAST week so I am super sensitive and still on the FMA love boat train thing. And tbh I never had ANY intention of ever watching this movie, but after hearing my friend describe his experience with the movie (he's a NON-FMA-fan and knows absolultey nothing about it) and just not having a good time with it; I had to see it and see for myself just what was wrong with it. And boy-oh-boy, please leave if you were hoping I'd be pleasantly surprised.

It has the bear basics of the character background and the bear basics of the world etc. which is just enough that non-anime/manga fans can just about understand BUT so much is left out. It misses and skips so much of the characters, of the development, of the world. There's just enough missing that also, non-FMA-people will get completely lost and somewhat disengaged with the story too. They really don't establish the childhood-friendness with Winry, Al and Ed, it's super briefed over. The hints about Hommunculus and the reason why they're searching for the Philosopher's Stone is, again, very heavily glossed over compared to the anime. I understand it's only 133 minute film BUT you definitely could've cut some other parts (especially parts that aren't in the anime/manga) in order to flesh out the details and the important parts. Especially in terms of emotional impact.

In the movie version Tucker is protrayed pitiful rather than a bit-shit crazy evil man. So when his dark side comes out, it just looks like a sad, pitiful man and there's no real satisfaction from him being beaten by Ed.

Yamada's emotional performance just doesn't land. The scene about the chimera, you couldn't see much anger or the switch between being happy-to realising what's happened-to getting super fucking angry, and his voice isn't strong enough to portray both his anger and his pain. It just didn't have any emotional impact.

A BIG positive is the setting and the location and such. It's perfect and so nice!

I really hate how heavily CGI'd Al's armour and Ed's arm and leg are. I don't understand why they didn't just build very realistic looking armour, have black clothes underneath so a stuntman/body-actor could wear it as Al and Yamada could've just pwore the armour. I feel like they were actual props BUT you can tell they've put CGI OVER it and it just looked stupid. Japan is well-known for tokusatsu costumes and you could've easily gone 100% realistic with Al's armour and it would've looked GOOD.

They do change the story somewhat but not enough to not be faithful to the original material.

While I do love Atomu, since watching the anime (last week) and actually becoming a fan of FMA, I totally understand and I am now in agreement with my friend that they should've just had the original voice actor for Al in the movie rather than Atomu BUT I do understand in the END GAME why Atomu is needed.

Winry can eff off. I've never liked the actress who plays her and she's in this MORE than she is in the anime. I don't even like the character in the anime so the fact they extended her part somewhat in this just annoyed me.

I don't like Hawkeye's actress or look either. It's clearly a wig. Why couldn't the actress just grow and dye her own hair? It'd look better. But any, recast her please.

Casting I AM happy about: Hughes!!! They picked the perfect actor for him! Even without seeing him in costume, I could tell he was a good choice. BUT, and it's a big 'but', the entire casting in general is too old. They've casted everyone 10-20years older than the actual characters ages. And I totally understand WHY. You need these big names in order to get a big budget, in order to get a lot of funding - I KNOW why Yamada was casted; more for the money rather than for him actually suiting the role <<< lets all admit this okay. I get it. We all get how the movie industry works. Especially with this movie being filmed via Warner Brothers, it was definitely more about 'hire the big actors so we get more money to play with' rather than hiring better, more accurate, faithfully-aged actors. So for the most part I am not annoyed with who was casted because this is the business. It happens. Don't get me wrong, Yamada did alright and he does have the voice which is just nice to listen to. When he's explaining or speaking fast, Yamada sounds REALLY damn good. But I can just think of a few other actors who would've suited, looked and acted the role better (COUGH COUGH UEDA KEISUKE FOR STARTERS!). And like, I LOVE KANATA HONGO but NOT as Envy. No no no no no no no not a good choice. Appearance wise; yes he fits Envy; his looks bratty, his skinny and he's somewhat short but the way he plays Envy and his voice; just no. You'd have better look getting a young actress to play Envy. Yes, I did just say actress. Especially because Envy is supposed to be GENDERFLUID!

BUT in general, I do not like MOST of this casting. I can think of a billion other people who would've been better in the role of Ed (no offence Yamada), I can think of so many more people who would've been perfect for Mustang (he is my baby, they ruined him in the movie; wrong casting completely). BUT then my friend said 'but would they haven't wanted to do this movie?' to which I straight away said 'good point, they wouldn't have accepted the role' and in fact they probably weren't even offered the role because; as I keep saying BIG NAMES = MORE MORE.

Ooooohhhh they RUINED Hughes' death! They CHANGED who the hell killed him!! AGAIN how are they going to fix and work around this in the future movie(s)?!

OMG that is HILARIOUS!!! SO the scene right AFTER Hughes' death we get Atomu-ception! We have Atomu playing a soldier arresting Ed while he stands next to Al who he bloody voices AND the soldier himself have BLONDE hair and just omg... what the fuck?! WHY and HOW did you think that was a good idea Warner?! That's gunna fuck people up for the ending for those who DON'T know Atomu

OH! NOT ENOUGH SMALL JOKES! And to be honest, I don't even think Yamada is that short! I don't think we get enough shots with him standing next to or near other people in a wide shot and stuff for us to go 'OH HE SMOL!'.

ALSO; WHERE THE EFF IS SCAR?!?!!?! WHERE IS SCAR?!?!?!!? He's SO important in the story and you didn't bother to introduce him in the first movie?! His first few fights with Ed are AMAZING! WHY is he not here?! WHY is he not in the movie?!

OMMGGG my friend was right about how BAD CGI and stuff is for Gluttony's real mouth. And his WADDLING! OMG his WADDLING was so funny.

They focused WAY to much on making Mustang and Hawkeye a THING. In the anime, they stay VERY professional for the most part. We understand they have romantic feels for each other but in public 99% of the time (and even in private!) they stay completely professional and 'we have police of this country'-type stance.

WAIT WHAT??!?!?! MUSTANG BURNING ROSS IN FRONT OF EVERYONE?!?! WHAT THE FUCK?! HOW THEY GOING TO EXPLAIN THAT AWAY?!?! WAAAAHHHHH THE ACTUAL?! .... WAIT WHAT?! THEY RUINED THE ENTIRE ENVY PLOT IN THE FIRST MOVIE?!

And I got SO confused when Al started having a go at Ed for 'I'm not real am I' and I'm like 'bitch this part of the story doesn't happen for AGES!!! What the hell?!' Also Lab 5 was just trash in this movie. AND Al goes off only about an hour into the film; we BARELY know these characters. There was no emotional impact at all. Just nothing. We haven't spent enough time getting to know these characters for this scene to work and make people cry at this point.

WAIT WHAT?! TUCKER IS STILL ALIVE AND HAS KIDNAPPED AL AND WINRY?! WTH is this plot line?!?!?!

Okay, kudos to Yamada for his scream acting when the Transmutation circle and the way to create Philosopher Stones are revealed. That was REALLY good.

WAIT WHAT?!?!? They revealed the ENTIRE soul army already?!?!?!!? That's not until like the LAST ten episodes of the anime! WTF.... Ohhh and the CGI for them is NOT good....

I am SO confused.... Mustang took the philosopher's stone out of Lust but that's not how you kill her!! You have to actually DESTROY the stone. If it's not destroyed by FMA RULES she's supposed to be able to reconstruct herself! WTF?! Why are they ignore this very important logic and basic rule?!

Whhhhyyyyyy did Ed use the stone?!?!? WHAT THE ACTUAL?!?! NOOOOO Ed you wtf?!?! That's not even canon!!!! WAAAAAAH?!?!

I wonder who they hired for Al's body... cos that DEFO isn't Atomu! << Again, how is this going to work if voice Al already looked this different to body Al?!

To be honest, FMA is too loved and too long for it to be a series of movies. If FMA was to get Live-Actioned it should've, right from the start, been a stage series. That's the only way they would've fit everything in and done justice to the story, and been able to do projection mapping and be able to go great action scenes using stunts and stunt equipment, and also in general, better and younger actors for the roles.

[jayankles]

Sunny Spain

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Summary: Jensen decides that his work is getting to much for him to handle so books a spontaneous trip to Spain, where he meets the reader.

Word Count: 2518

Warnings: Reader’s got a shitty past, mostly fluff, porcupine hair!jensen(defo a warning)

A/N-This is my entry for @dancingalone21 Lau’s Summer Escape Challenge - I chose the prompt Barcelona, Spain if you couldn’t already tell by the title. And thank you @salvachester who I can’t freaking tag, for checking my Spanish for me.

It was quite funny actually the green eyed man had been at the bar for at least ten minutes and still no such luck. From afar, you bit your lip, trying to stifle a laugh. He was getting frustrated, that much you could tell.

Getting up from your place on the sandy beach, you dust the sand off your butt and walk over to the bar, where the man was still shouting.

‘Please, I just want a beer! Does no one speak English here?’ Jensen wasn’t pleased.

His holiday abroad was supposed to be calm and relaxing but instead had been a lot more stressful that he anticipated.

Before booking a spontaneous trip, he should make sure that they could speak English or that he could try and learn the basics of the language.

He should really buy and carry around a Spanish to English dictionary.

‘¡Hola! ¿Cómo estás?’

Great, another Spanish speaker that is going to get served before him. Jensen without a beer when he wants one turns his inner voice into one hell of a sassy dude.

The bartender smiles at the woman, at you, and answers, ‘bien gracias, ¿y tú?’

You tilt your head head from side to side, a small smile on your face as you answered that you were fine too.

‘¿Qué estás teniendo?’ The bartender grips hold of the pump closest to him and waits for you to order.

‘Voy a tomar una cerveza para mi amigo inglés y, para mí, un vodka y coca cola.’

‘¿Un simple o doble?

‘Solo por favor’

The conversation between you and the bartender moves swiftly, he places your order in front of you and tells you the total. Handing over the euros, you wait for the change before pocketing it in your shorts.

Smiling, you turn to the English speaking man and hand him the beer that he had been struggling to order himself.

‘Quite a few of us speak English, you know,’ You smirk as you turn to the befuddled man. ‘Stressing yourself isn’t going to help it, dude.’

The tall, dark and handsome man gratefully takes the proffered beer and asks how much he owes you for the beer.

You wave your hand and shake your head, ‘I just want your name, otherwise I am going to keep calling you tall, dark and handsome.’

If it wasn’t already hot, it definitely did turn hotter. He felt it at the tips of his ears and the length of his neck.

Muy caliente, as they would say.

He swallowed a sip of his beer, the redness of his cheeks accelerating as he realised what you had said.

‘Jensen,’ he stuck out his hand, you accepted it gracefully, your dainty fingers wrapping around his larger ones. ‘But I guess you can call me whatever you want. Since I don’t know yours, you wanna do a little name exchange? You know mine but I don’t know yours. I’ll keep calling you beautiful in my head and you can call me tall, dark and handsome. If you didn’t wanna tell me who you are.

Jensen was so cute when he was babbling, he was even cuter when he screwed his mouth shut and scrunched his face together when he realised.

‘Aww, how sweet,’ you gushed, ‘a few minutes into our friendship and we already have nicknames for each other. My name is Y/N, if you must know.’

Jensen’s face turned almost a crimson colour as he blushed but he admired your subtle boldness.

He could instantly tell that you were a kind, warm hearted person and loved have fun; he loved your sassy personality – definitely a cool trait to have when meeting someone on a first meeting.

‘So Jensen, what brings you to sunny Spain? Is it the sun?’ You smirked at him, giving him a flirty wink.

Jensen wrapped his lips around the neck of his bottle and took a pull of the beer that you had so kindly ordered and brought for him.

‘I guess you’re right. The sun was pretty enticing, compared to Vancouver, but I had to get away from work and take a bit of a break. It being overwhelming and all. My work and personal life were merging a little too much and I’m not in the right mindset for that.’ He shook his head, clearing his mind a little before he asked, ‘what about you Y/N? You speak Spanish, are you from here?’

With a lick of his lips, the green eyed god in front of you awaited your response.

You took a seat on the barstool next to him, sipping at your vodka and coke. ‘I only know basic Spanish, enough to get me around. In high school, I decided to study it in my free time. I wanted to go to college and further study it but couldn’t because of my grandpa; he got sick, so we had to pay for the proper medication.’

You took a deep breath, realising that you may have divulged a little too much information but your mouth had a mind of his own.

‘I’m a journalist. I hop around a lot covering what the media thinks is important or not in some cases, writing reviews of places they send me.

‘Sometimes it pays well, depending on where I go but others I’ve had to skrimp and save before I can move on to the next thing.

‘I’ve been here for a while, deciding to take a break like you, and try to get past an incident that happened on my previous job. Nearly got me killed because they didn’t like what I had written and published; the couldn’t handle the truth. A nice older couple took me in, aided me back to health, kept me safe and I owe them my life.’

Jensen hadn’t expected you to reveal such information, he was expecting a short simple sentence or two joined together, along the lines of ‘I’m here on break from being a teacher, the kids are driving me nuts.’

He didn’t look at you with sorrow and despair in his eyes. Although he did hold sympathy for you, he knew that he shouldn’t have been the one to cause you to dive into your past, especially if it was that traumatising, revealing that kind of information to a stranger was bold and daring. He liked being that person that you could trust even if you had known each other for a short amount of time.

‘So now that we’re friends…’ he changed the subject, it was very welcome. ‘You wanna exchange phone numbers? That way you can teach me how to order my own beer.’

You held up your glass and Jensen did the same, clinking your glasses together, ‘to new friendships and ordering a beer in Spanish.’

He repeated the chant and smiled at you, taking another pull of his beer as you sipped at your drink through your straw.

You pulled out your phone and unlocked it, opening up the contact app so Jensen could input his details, while he did the same for you.

Jensen was benevolent and attentive as you continued to chat and banter, throwing out empty threats of pushing the other into the ocean but as you got to know him a little more, there was a playful side to each other that could have meant that those empty threats may not have been so empty.

A few bottles and glasses of alcohol later, the both of you had relaxed immensely, a weight lifted off both of your shoulders, laughing and giggling about everything and nothing. Your inhibitions were definitely no more as you scooted closer to each other, the two of you close enough that could see the golden flecks in his emerald irises.

‘Wow…’ you breathed, a little too close to Jensen. If he had a problem with it, he didn’t say anything and you were damn grateful because it gave you the opportunity to study his face. Freckles, both light and dark, dusting his nose and smattering his cheeks. His eyes flicked over both of yours, going back and forth in a matter of seconds.

‘What’s wow?’  He said, equally as quiet.

You squinted your eyes at him, wondering how he did it, ‘you, Jensen, you’re so goddamn pretty. Your eyes,’ you slurred, ‘they just pop and- and your freckles are so cute and then there’s this little thing you do with- with your tongue when you smile and it’s adorable. Why are you like this? Teach me your ways!’

You grabbed hold of his shoulders and shook them for emphasis.

Jensen let out a full belly laugh, so much so that his body swung back in the seat, almost falling off his bar stool.

At some point in the night, the bartender had cut you off, refusing to serve you any longer when he thought the both of you had reached your limit.

Soon after that, and and Jensen strolled arm in arm along the beach, content to stay in silence and enjoy the sounds of the crashing waves. You grew tired quickly, legs wobbling as your feet dug into the sand, you made sure your companion knew about your tiredness.

‘Jay!’ You whined loudly against his shoulder. ‘Can we stop for a second? My feet are killing me.’

‘Alright beautiful, you can take a rest or I could carry you, your choice sweetheart.’

You didn’t speak with your voice, you let your arms do the talking. You held them out and wrapped them around his neck. Jensen lifted you, his arms wrapped around your back and hooked underneath your knees.

Since his hotel wasn’t that far away, Jensen decided that it was a good idea to carry you the entire way there.

Your fuzzy mind could barely comprehend what was happening until Jensen had stepped out of the elevator and found his room. Putting you down on the ground, keeping an arm around your waist so he could fish out his keycard from his pocket.

Jensen got you into his room without another protest from your fuzzy brain self.

Waking up the next morning, with your eyes still closed, you could barely remember a thing about the previous night. Man, you really had drunk too much last night.

Your head was pounding, big mistake, you were never drinking again – until next time that is. You really didn’t want to open your eyes, well, that was until you felt a weight against the bare skin of your waist.

Your eyes shot open and you scrambled away from the weight, which happened to be attached to a gorgeous man – urgh, what was his name again. Jordan. Jason. Jensen!

‘What?’ The man shot up and you realised you had shouted his name out loud. He was still so adorable, even with ruffled porcupine hair and a dazed and I just woke up look on his face. It was disgusting.

You looked down at your body, squealing a little as you went to grab the sheet to cover your body – only clad in underwear.

‘Why am I in my underwear? We didn’t- did we?’

Jensen chuckled as you almost fell off the bed and questioned whether you got the goods last night.

‘First of all, I wouldn’t take advantage of you or anyone if they’re intoxicated. Secondly, I offered you my clothes and you took them. But as soon as you put them on and got under the covers, you kicked them off – said it was too hot, urgh, I can’t cope. I gotta take these off. They’re so restricting.

‘You took off my clothes and threw them over there.’ He pointed over his shoulder. ‘But I  was already in bed and couldn’t be bothered to get up and put them away. I also brought you here because you refused to tell me where you were staying and you wouldn’t let go of my neck, not even when I set you down outside of my room. It was pretty cute actually. You’re very clingy when your drunk and you tended to touch my face a lot too. When I asked you why, you just said I had a cute face and an ‘A+ jawline.’ Thank you, by the way. Coffee?’

Sitting on the bed, you groaned as he explained your drunk self to your sober self. Way to make a fool out of yourself, now he thinks you are loco. Good job you, extra brownie points on the embarrassment card.

‘Yes please.’

You clasped your head in both of your hands, why did you let your guard down?

Jensen came out, his palm resting on your back as he handed you the coffee he made, ‘you shouldn’t beat yourself up you know. I can take you back to the bar and you can make your way home and I won’t have to know where you live.’

‘Thank you but you’re not like the others, Jensen. I’m not rushing out of here to find the morning after pill because some ass thought it was a good idea to fuck whilst drunk.’

‘That’s okay, I’ll be your night in shining armour anyday.’ He winked. ‘Since you don’t have any spare clothes I got you one of my shirts, a pair of shorts and boxers, you’re welcome to use the shower too and because you don’t know where you are I’m going to treat you to breakfast.’

‘Jensen, you are a dream, like are you even real?’ You whispered daydreaming, if you had a man like Jensen most of your problem’s. Mostly your single life problems but they’re problems, nonetheless.

‘I can assure you that I am real and just as human as you are. I must really like you if I’m sharing my hot water.’

Your face almost split into two as you beamed. ‘I must really like you too because I really wanna kiss you right now.’

Jensen cocked an eyebrow, a cheeky grin growing on his face from where he sat next to you, his hand coming up so his knuckles brushed against your cheek before he cupped it in his large hand. ‘So why don’t you?’

And good god, you were not going to miss out on this opportunity.

You closed the gap between you and Jensen, attaching your lips together. Jensen’s brow furrowed as he deepened the kiss, his lips plump and soft as they slanted against yours.

Smiling against his lips, he pulled away, a little out of breath and pressing his forehead against yours.

‘You have really bad morning breath.’

You shoved at his shoulder, pushing him away as he cackled at you.

‘You’re a jerk.I knew you were too good to be true’ You reprimanded him through pursed lips before you grabbed your clothes that were scattered and the pile of clothes Jensen had stacked on the table next to the bed, heading straight for the shower so you could be treated to a free breakfast. You had a good feeling about Jensen, you were sure you were going to have a great vacation, especially if he was involved.

Lemme know what you think...

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[nightglider124]

GAAAAAH Your writing is like chocloate: Addicting and sweet! OK, how about... 35, for CyBee?

Oooo, interesting. I like this prompt and defo something these dorks would do.

“If you tell them it’s my birthday to get free cake, so help me I will strangle you.”

Family outings as such; didn’t happen often. Only really when special occasions occurred. Or, when said family hadn’t seen each other in a while.

Now that they were older and had gone their separate ways, they found themselves pencilling in appointments and get togethers with one another a hell of a lot more than they used to.

It was nice though; it was always a chance to catch up on gossip and catch up on one another’s lives and what had been happening.

The last time they had gotten together like this was a good few months ago so they were all eager to see each other again.

Vic and Karen had been the first to arrive, both agreeing that they needed enough time to scan over the menu and make an informed decision about what they’d be eating tonight. Food was serious business in the Stone household. The two of them were still very wrapped up in the honeymoon stage of their relationship.

Having got married only a year ago, they were still a very playful couple, excitable and giddy. Then again, they’d always been like that in truth.

“Chicken wings or French fries?” Vic wondered, eyes focused on the menu,

“Duh, both, Sparky.” Karen muttered, looking at her husband like he had a screw loose.

He blinked at her before giving her a goofy smile, “God, I love you.”

Karen smirked and patted his cheek, “Damn straight.”

Vic chuckled and caught a glimpse of Garfield and Raven coming through the main door, both wearing their hologram rings as well. It was always a shock seeing Gar’s blonde hair and pale skin as opposed to his true appearance.

The moment the shapeshifted saw them, he beamed across the room, “Hey guys!” He chirped, pulling Raven along with him,

The two had been married for a long while now, even moved out to Africa for a short time and were planning on moving back in the next month to be closer to them all again.

“Hey B,” Vic greeted, high fiving his best friend. Raven smiled softly and her and Karen exchanged kisses on the cheek,

“Hi, you two. How have you been?” Raven asked, shrugging off her jacket before going around to receive a bear hug from Vic.

“We’re good; trying to sift through this menu of theirs.” Vic mumbled, turning said menu over.

Garfield narrowed his eyes, “This is the place with vegan options, right?”

“Please don’t say you’re getting some nasty ass tofu, B.”

Raven and Karen shook their heads but smiled at their husbands; some things never changed even as you grew older,

A bitter gust of wind blew through the restaurant again as the door opened once more. Vic turned his head, away from his debate with Gar and he beamed at the man who walked in. His dark hair flopped across his eyes but it was him alright.

Dick flashed them a grin before holding the door open and ushering Kory through. Karen squealed and her face absolutely lit up at the sight of the Princess. And for good reason.

Kory giggled and placed a hand on Dick’s arm and placed the other on her swollen belly; the reason for their last get together those few months ago.

Karen was up and out of her seat as soon as they’d ambled inside a little more. She crouched before Kory and patted her belly, “Oh! Look how big you’ve gotten! Ohh, I want her to come now!”

Vic smiled absently at his wife’s behaviour. She’d always been a sassy, no nonsense kind of girl, especially when they were teenagers but the motherly side of her had been a bit of a surprise. She’d cooed and gone completely gaga over Starfire’s pregnancy.

It always felt bittersweet.

Having kids with her; that was a dream of his that had been wedged in the back of his mind for years but therein lay the problem. Due to his condition of being half mechanical; kids weren’t an option. At least not in the natural way.

Recently though, he’d been eyeing up adoption sites and just wondering.

Dick chuckled as he helped his wife waddle over to the table, keeping a hand on the small of her back, “I don’t know, Karen. She’s not quite ready to be taken out of the oven yet.”

Kory had that pregnant glow though, especially as she gave each of her friends a hug and a kiss before having Dick carefully pull her chair out for her,

“My love, please stop fussing-” Kory sighed, smiling softly,

He kissed her nose, “I’m not fussing, Star. I’m being… chivalrous.”

She rolled her eyes as he took a seat beside her.

Dinner was lovely; they chatted about Gar and Raven’s moving back home, they talked about Dick and Kory’s bubby and they talked about Vic’s promotion over at STAR Labs.

The food was divine too. So many flavours and aromas as the delicacies were placed down around the table. They toasted their glasses of wine; with the exception of Starfire with her water to which triple checked she had absolutely no trace of alcohol.

However, as the main course was finished off, Vic and Karen found themselves… peckish. They shared a knowing glance and Karen offhandedly asked,

“So… dessert, you guys?”

There was a unanimous approval around the table, a couple nods here and there to agree that they could eat something sweet to finish the night off.

Vic eyed the waiter nearest their table who was sorting through menus at the podium beside the bar. A grin found its way onto his lips and Karen immediately knew what he was up to.

“Please, don’t.” Karen muttered, her eyes wide,

“What?” Vic chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck,

“Don’t what me; you know what I’m talkin’ about, Sparky.”

“I don’t know what you’re-”

She raised an eyebrow at him, “If you tell them it’s my birthday to get free cake, so help me I will strangle you.”

Raven smirked, “He does what?”

Karen shook her head, “He does it all the time. Just never at the same place, obviously.”

Garfield chuckled, “Haha! Sneaky, Cy. I love it!”

The curly haired stinger narrowed her eyes at her husband, “Don’t. Do. It.”

Vic raised an eyebrow and slowly smirked at her, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY  TO YOU-” He bellowed,

Karen’s eyes widened and a blush tinted her cheeks as other people turned their heads to look over,

“Happy birthday to  youuu-” The rest of the former Titans started singing and Karen finally understood them as a group. She ducked her head and the blush intensified,

“Oh god, kill me now.” She mumbled, whilst Vic laughed and kissed her temple.

[ao3feed-aizawashouta]

by NoirSun

Causality. He often wondered if they could have somehow avoided this; or perhaps they were what caused this to happen in the first place. They had most likely brought this upon themselves. The hate fell from his fingertips in violent rage.

Responsibility. How fragile, their light. She took in the red skies and breathed in the iron soaked air. It was their duty, their honour to fight for a better world than this one. But they were children, thrust into war; and once it ends, what would they become?

Legacy. He could have done more, could have been more decisive. Was this his legacy, to watch all he loved burn before him? He laced his fingers with hers as the inky destruction slipped past his lips in anguish. He once swore to always do right by her; it was time for him to make good on that promise.

Hope. He was entrusted with the future; and he was being crushed by all he was meant to carry. This was probably his end, he could feel it. But as pure energy crackled and coursed through him, several voices from the past screamed out in defiance, in a prayer to go beyond.

They had not given up yet. Neither would he.

Words: 2746, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of Songs of War, Hope Ascending

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death

Categories: F/M, M/M

Characters: Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Hisashi, Original Male Character(s), Todoroki Shouto, Yaoyorozu Momo, Bakugou Katsuki, Kaminari Denki, Class 1-A (My Hero Academia), Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Class 1-B (My Hero Academia), U.A. Faculty (My Hero Academia), U.A. Students (My Hero Academia), Support Department (My Hero Academia), Original Female Character(s), Todoroki Enji | Endeavor, Dabi (My Hero Academia), Todoroki Touya, Todoroki Rei, Todoroki Natsuo, Todoroki Fuyumi, Yaoyorozu Momo's Parents, Shiozaki Ibara, Kirishima Eijirou, Iida Tenya, Hatsume Mei, League of Villains (My Hero Academia), Other Character Tags to Be Added

Relationships: Midoriya Izuku/Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku/Melissa Shield, Midoriya Hisashi/Midoriya Inko, Todoroki Shouto/Yaoyorozu Momo, Shiozaki Ibara/Original Character(s), Hatsume Mei/Original Character(s), Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou, Hatsume Mei/Iida Tenya, Iida Tensei | Ingenium/Todoroki Fuyumi, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, issa gonna get messy, Midoriya Hisashi is important, but he ain't All for One, I hate that theory, we get snippets of him as we go, but he won't properly come in until later, i don't get the hate this fandom gives Midoriya Hisashi, its so unnecessary, like let's meet the guy before we automatically decide he's a scum bag, Spies & Secret Agents, Secret Organizations, War, Post- World War III, world-building, Outer Space (eventually), Dabi is Todoroki Touya, the world in this is a mess tbh, The Author Regrets Nothing, The Author Regrets Everything, Human Experimentation, mankind and its lust for power amiright??, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Angst, if you couldn't already tell by the rest of the tags, Everyone Needs A Hug, My First Work in This Fandom, Infinity Stones, that last one wasn't a joke, I'm seriously considering it, elements and big things gonna be taken from Marvel and DC alike, so prepare your asses for that, everyone gets stronk in the future, ya'll gonna hate me for this, I can already tell, in for the long haul, there will defo be multiple arcs and sagas and shit, none of which I have planned out yet, i reiterate: this is a hot mess, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Titles, I'm Going to Hell, the title will probs be redone, Not Beta Read, oh yeah, Fluff and Humor too, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, additional 'oh yeah' moment:, SLOW BURN ON SOME OF THOSE SHIPS MOTHERFUCKERS, don't worry it's not going to be a COMPLETE brooding and angst-fest

[spaceleviathan]

a BRIEF CHAT

Just wanted to say that Find Your Bones has been a long-time labour of love, not necessarily in how long it took me to write (though it did take me a long time) but how long its lived more or less entirely in my head. Anyway, here are a couple of thoughts:

I dont know if i’m happy with it but im defo not un happy. I had an additional scene in which was important to write but took a bit from the type of story i was trying to tell, but also gave it a turn which I don’t think was needed. Might add it under a cut just to show u guys what i mean. 

I wrote this fic in 2 different sections, which were about 3 years apart. I’d more or less completely wrote the first half probably a year after i’d first started figuring out how i’d want to structure this world, and then everything after Jack showing up was written late last year. I dunno how obvious it is, honestly, but i’ve tried my best to smooth it all out. 

Took a lot of inspiration from a lot of different places, and weirdly the old Heathers movie actually helped to finish it. The bit i cut out had a character who was basically meant to basically be JD i’m not even pretending, and u can still see the influence in like ...2 throw away lines in the fic. But i’m mentioning it cos it is literally the only reason this ever got finished. Weird how and when inspiration comes to u.

Building on that, The original incarnation of this story had Ennis and the Joker as separate entities (in a less metaphorical way then what i ended up with), and so JD who i already see very strong Joker influences in was just... a really handy way of giving me one possible backstory. I was going to discuss how they met in more detail, but all i really ended up with was the little section under the cut WHICH I THEN CUT ANYWAY. 

And thats the thing I really learned from this fic - how to just... kill parts that don’t work. It’s fairly basic writing technique but is absolutely one of the hardest things to do. I’m still learning. Like, for example, I’m not thrilled that I changed POV’s just for the last bit, cos that stands a chance of really breaking the flow.

On the flipside, because this isn’t the most... intuitive crossovers, it’s been a whole song and dance just to post it (and now i’m even trying to justify myself) so i guess it’s also forced me to remember that this is a fanfic and i can change POV’s whenever i like. I can change it right now. Witness me.

And so the heroic author stopped offering whatever insight they think is worth imparting on unsuspecting followers, and goes the fuck to sleep.

Oh, and come yell at me on twitter pls i’M BEGGING 

peace out yall

Once upon a time, Ennis Del Mar walked into a gas station, where a man who went by Jay stared intently at the slushy machine.

“Spare any change?” The man asked, in a strange drawl not immediately recognisable, but not unfamiliar. Ennis nodded, and didn’t make eye contact even as Jay dipped and moved his head.

It took time for Ennis to catch sight of the man’s face, rounding on him only when Jay had followed him around the whole station. “What the hell d’you think you’re doing-“

Ennis froze.

Jay said, “It’s wonderful to meet me,” hands deep in his overcoat pocket, mouth smiling crookedly. “It gets so lonely being the only one.”

Ennis could feel eyes on his back, and heard whispering he knew must be about them. Jay leaned close. His features were familiar to Ennis, slightly more hollow around the cheeks, more manic around the eyes.

“Who are you?” Ennis asked, lowly, trying to step back without drawing any more attention to either of them. Jay didn’t seem interested in the sparse few people littering the inside of the station, and smiled that bit brighter.

“Say,” he said slowly, instead of answering, and Ennis felt a crawling up his spine, as if Jay could see straight through his skin and see everything he was trying to hide underneath. “You sound a long way from home, friend.”

“I ain’t your friend,” he responded, blocking his arm against Jay’s chest when he tried to step even closer. For a moment, Jay paused. Then, he smiled again, wider and wider each time.

“You look like a man with a story to tell. And you know what they say, a stranger is just a friend that hasn’t told you their damage yet.” He was too close, pressing against Ennis’ arm, cornered him in an empty aisle far from the counter and nosy customers. “You tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine.”

“Now listen here-“ Enis started, furious, flushing, realising what was happening for the first time and mortified that a stranger could recognise him so plainly.

“Do you have a truck?” Jay asked. “My bike broke a couple of miles back, I’ve been pushing it along the road, but I think it’s kaput. Killed itself in the heat. Think I could grab a ride?” He winked, and Ennis scowled. “I’ll buy you a beer.”

Ennis’ instincts were to refuse the man, push him back or punch him in the face. His shame overcame even that, and he wanted more than anything to get out of this place and away from any curious eyes.

So he asked, already dreading his decision, “Where you headed?” And Jay just kept on smiling.

Once upon a time, a man woke up surrounded by stench and pain. His ears were ringing, and he couldn’t move his mouth. His head was tacky, there was a splash of red on the patch of pavement he’d used as a pillow, and he had a distant thought of a warm bed and a mother’s hand soothing some distant sore.

As of now, he felt like his entire face had been split into two. Catching a dizzy glance at his reflection in a filthy window, he realised he hadn’t been entirely wrong.

He winced into the mid-morning light, barely hitting him through the shadow of sky-scrapers. Thought, I don’t know, which covered many of his current questions. Realised, slowly, there was a gun in his pocket and a wad of cash too thick to be gained in anyway but one. Wondered, finally, the clearest thought yet, with not a small ounce of glee, what in the hell he’d been up to.