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rkiveinmarvel · 2 months ago

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vsego dva prizraka - james bucky barnes des. barnes never trusted you, not once. but upon a different life, he would. notes. angst/comfort, enemies-to-lovers, mention of violence, curse words, idiots-in-love, sharon carter is a meanie here, trauma, torturing and avengers! shenanigans

hello! it's my bucky fic! part ii of upon a different life is here! thank you for supporting it, means a lot! anyway, here's part ii, uh--sharon carter is higkey unlikeable here so, i'm sorry! enjoy loving bucky!

(part i) (part ii) | w.c: 7.8k (got carried away, mb)

As you trace the track of living the endless cycle of you and the White Wolf stumbling in this much different life, James Barnes slowly learns fragments and side of you that were covered during the time in HYDRA’s grasp, don’t get him wrong, part of him still navigating in living and breathing around you but somehow, he doesn’t mind learning more about you, he somehow find himself tangled in your webs: in which he rationalized that maybe the words of HYDRA never left his head or maybe, just maybe, he felt a sense of familiarity with you, a reminder that he wasn’t alone, that in the corners of the Avengers compound, someone understands him.

You, on the other hand, slowly make amends to the people you caused trouble when you were still HYDRA’s living leverage: some of them thanked you for apologizing while some did not take any apologies from you. Despite the hardship of earning people’s forgiveness, a part of you was grateful that the bed was even warmer than before, people actually smiled at you, talked to you, and you built the idea that the world isn’t always red and bruised.

For another, you finally see the Sergeant that fell off the train in 1945, how his life is ultimately different to the one you previously known, how his attention is relatively closed-knitted with books rather than guns and knives, how his grumpy old gaze was just him being confused, and how his metal arm is for carrying Banner’s stuff rather than a weapon to be used. It is refreshing to see things in a different light, but there’s still a present guilt on how you stole these simple things from the Sergeant, a lingering disgust within you was still present. How you wish HYDRA didn’t use him; how you wished you didn’t use him–despite his given acknowledgement of forgiveness: a terrible little you burns the edge of your mind. Yet, as you meet his eyes while sparring, in missions, in the kitchen, and at night, it keeps you grounded that what you have now is a chance to prove yourself—that you’re more than just HYDRA’s stupid toy.

After a few months of the events of you and Bucky sharing a moment in Brooklyn, you two find each other’s presence more grounding, call it sharing a trauma or trauma-bonding but what is certain, the each of you became each other’s compass in wandering the softer edge of the world.

The mission was executed properly and Tony Stark, being the man he is, decided to throw a party at the compound: with close friends, workers, family, and the Avengers–as the people went through the party, you stayed at the bar and challenged drinks with Yelena and Sam.

Sam and Yelena are on their fifth drink as their visions start to betray them. It was a stupid challenge, really, but it was amusing to join. As you drank your fifth drink, you winced at the bitterness and warmth coursing through your throat. “You two okay…?” You asked, basically indicating that you are still in the right state of mind, body, and soul.

“Absolutely…” Yelena uttered but her words were shaky and unstable as Sam just nodded and tried to sit up straight. In another point of view, it seems like you poisoned the two, but in this challenge: pride was on the line. “You know, you two should take a rest…”

The Falcon immediately protested his dislike at the idea of taking a rest, but before he could argue, he fell off his chair, causing Yelena to fall as well. “Told you…” You uttered under your breath. As Rhodes and Wanda helped the two go back to their room, you were left alone in the bar as a familiar metal arm tapped the table.

“You finally decided to show up.” Bucky nods and sits on the stool. “I heard that Sam fell flat on his face, so I had to see it.” You shook your head and nodded. “Anything I can get you?” Bucky decided whiskey on the rocks, as he was just taking a sip every now and then.

You asked the White Wolf why he wasn't joining Steve and Thor sharing drinks at the other side of the room, his eyes looking over the God of Thunder and Steve as he just looks back at his drink. “Just not feeling like talking to other people, everyone’s here is so different from the 40s.” You nodded as you sip your drink as well.

“Well, I’m not from the 40s, so, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you replied as you watched the people having fun. “But I guess, I do get where you’re coming from. I mean, people are actually…talking, not ordering me around.” You chuckled unsure, yet Bucky knew what you meant.

As you sighed, you looked over at him. “How’s your trip with Peter? I heard the kid practically dragged you around Queens for his project.” A small sigh and smile left James’ lips. “Parker was talking a lot, he introduced me in the corners of Queens, it was nice. But I still choose—.” you continue his words.

“Brooklyn.” You both said in unison, as he nodded. After a while, you two just watch the party in the bar. In the scene of soft music and chattering noises, it was quiet on your side. As if there was another world being built there–a look of adoration of the people around the room is present in the eyes of two former people of HYDRA, call it a look of longing or even hoping; in the back of Bucky’s mind he remembered the days where he dance with girls in the 1940s while you wonder if being in a party means being happy in people’s company.

Bucky was about to say something when he saw people dancing on the dance floor. Despite the uplifting mood, some people swayed to the music, calmly, not out of rhythm but still a form of slow dancing. His eyes darted to you as he saw how intrigued and focused you are in the people dancing.

“First time seeing people dancing?” He asked, as you spared him a look and you nodded. “Would it be weird if I said yes?” Bucky shook his head a ‘no’. He knew what you went through as he took a sip and said: “It’s not weird. But, it’s surprising..”

“Why is it surprising?”

“Well, when you and Natasha went to the ball for an undercover mission, didn’t you two dance with people to blend in…?”

“Oh, the mission in Budapest.” You nodded. “I didn’t dance that night, not once in my life, I think…” He glanced at you, as you asked if he danced. The Sergeant had this nostalgic look in his eyes, as if he tried to remember the soft hands he held as he danced in the 40s. With a last sip of his drink, he had a smug look on his face. “1943. Her name was Connie.” You listened intently.

He shared the Stark Expo, the memories he has as he danced with Connie before the war. As he grabbed a beer at a nearby table, to his surprise, you’re actually listening to him: He also told how he gave Steve a date that time, a double date, as he mentioned. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe the ambiance, but Bucky couldn’t stop talking to you—especially, when you’re looking at him as if he’s the only person in the world. Listening to him as if the music isn’t filling your ears.

He should not let the soft smile appear, yet he loves this. He loved being listened to. Despite, his demeanor and adjusting behavior around you; getting used with you, he let it slip—he hoped it was the alcohol, god, he hoped it was—he smiled at you, not an awkward one nor a smug one, it is a smile reserved for the times he felt at ease: the smile he had when he stayed at Sam’s hometown, the smile he had when he saw the flying car in Stark Expo, the smile he had when he was saved by Steve, and a smile that made his ears warm when he was dancing with Connie in 1943.

You smiled back, the Sergeant looked so handsome. A pretty man. In the moment, you two are like teenagers down the block or somewhat two strangers finally see each other eye-to-eye. As James ignored the warmth in his cheeks—pretending it was from the alcohol—he breaks the smile. As you question: “Was it nice…?”

Moments like this, James realized that you two are not far from each other; he got to experience becoming a human, before mess happened. While you lived in the mess, not knowing what it means to be a human—he pity you sometimes, he often wonders if you’re just making this up, waiting for a moment so, you can fuck him up but moments like this, he somehow recalls you had this look of ingenuity, as if you have no clue: how to live.

And he knew, for he also had the same look in his eyes. So, he nods and looks at the people sharing a slow dance. “It felt nice..” As you sip your drink, the Sergeant wants to ask you something, yet a bitter voice in his head holds those words back. In that he settled with that answer, as he drank the beer while you watched the people dance. A simple breath left you: “I’ll figure it out how it feels..”

If things were different, the bitter voice in his head would have not bothered him—but for now, he settled with whatever he had with you, as he left it at that.

You walked in the compound and smelled the spices in the kitchen, with a book in your hand—you saw Vision and Wanda cooking. Since the Redhead A.I has heightened senses, he welcomed and invited you. You felt like a trash third wheel, but as Wanda gave you a smile and offered what they cooked, it was more than welcoming.

A look from the outside was watching the three of you, or perhaps, you. The blue eyes watched you, as if he was analyzing how different you look: you looked at ease, your shoulders aren’t tense; you looked so…calm. “Are you going to run or are we gonna be staring at them until it gets weird?” Sam eyed the Sergeant as he glared back.

“Shut up, I’m almost done with my lap.” He grunted, going back to the stupid running bet with Sam. As Sam catched up with the grumpy old-man, Sam snickered. “That cyborg brain of yours is functioning in a new gear.” The Falcon teased, to which Bucky ignored–but he couldn’t help but wonder why he felt different around you: it was wrong, at least, that’s what he tells himself—he firmly believes, it was nothing but a mere heat of the moment perhaps, a little assurance for the trauma that you two share.

It was a normal day, to say so at least, the rest were doing their own things—enjoying the uneventful day, when afternoon arrived, some found themselves seeking to shut-eye: but not the former secret service of HYDRA and White Wolf.

“How about George Owell’s books?” You asked the Sergeant who was reading a book as he sat on the library’s couch. He raised his head and looked up at you at the loft of the library. “Haven’t read it but Dr. Strange said it’s a good one.” you nodded as you continued to scan the books in the library of the compound.

After a few hours of Bucky reading, he realized you’re not back in the seat where you promised to sit after you find the right book for you—that was an hour ago. He placed the book, The Hobbit, on the table as he called out your name. Your lack of response was a little jitter in his head, it’s unusual, or maybe it is usual, but he couldn’t help but check on you. As he climbed on the loft, he found you, reading a book on the floor.

He was bewildered as he saw you, reading a book on the floor as he sighed and sat next to you. “You finished your book?” You asked as he just shook his head; he didn’t say anything, letting you read in silence. In that moment, maybe, he was reading it all wrong—not the book, but you: he longs to be near you, whether he admits it or not, he stole glances as you read the book.

He should still hate you, you stole everything from him. But, his heartbeat quickens when you two share a soft moment, his ears ring when he does something that makes you laugh, his hands shake when you don’t respond to his comms when you two are on a mission, he doesn’t get it. He should still hate you, but he can’t help it—maybe, he’ll get it, once you do too.

As you read thoroughly, you felt a head on your shoulder. Typically, you would push it away, but as you heard even breathing as a relaxed state, you let it be. You didn’t move an inch, as you let the Sergeant sleep on your shoulder. It’s not the first time you served as a pillow to your new home, it was mostly Wanda or Yelena; sometimes Thor, when he wants to annoy you—but this felt new and raw. Your heart pounds louder, god, you hoped that the White Wolf won’t hear it.

It was scary to feel this, the loud banging on your chest, the tensed shoulder you had, yet as you looked over your shoulder, you saw his closed eyes and relaxed eyebrows—your memory drifted to the time you hear his screams when HYDRA removes his memory, you tensed as you remember how he bear the pain as you just watch across the room, and you remembered how the his furrowed eyebrows in the cryo-sleeping machine. The guilt was seething pain in your neck, it tasted bitter, but for once, you ignored the bitter taste in your lips, you found a better position, as you lean back, Barnes fell further in your shoulder as head touched the side of your neck.

You smiled softly—the one you gave Barnes at the party, the one you gave Barnes as you apologized; the smile you gave Bucky at the diner, a few months ago. With a heavy feeling, you leaned in his head as you rested your cheek.

You are damn sure, this will result into stiff neck, back pain, or even cramps—but just this once, you’ll bear it, just this once you’ll let your back and muscle scream, and just this once you let James Buchanan Barnes sleep, with a relaxed eyebrows in the warm presence of the library.

It wasn’t long when you feel sleepy too, it was an afternoon hit afterall, but a part of you wishes to stay awake, you want this to last, yet, you found yourself closing your eyes, relaxing in the library. You knew you’ll figure it out one day, whether it’s right or wrong to long for this, you’ll figure it out how to pour your heart to the person who has a broken heart because of you—you’ll figure it out, you know it—you just hope, Bucky will figure it out too.

Everything was doing fine with you and Bucky; the entire team felt it too—the sudden change, the loosen tension, and the given knowing look. You and Bucky did too but the trip to the destination wasn't an easy one, most of the time, Bucky steps on things he was not sure he can step on, other times you bit off things more than you can chew. Stark and Steve saw what was going on, the three steps forward yet four times back.

But little things keep you on arms length with the Sergeant: it’s not easy to look past with what you’ve done to him after all; it’s not easy for James to just forget everything that was stolen from him—for another, a part of you was new to this, the unknown butterflies when the Sergeant would do something as he glance at you, the red ears but not from the cold but when you hear James laugh, and the fast-paced beat: it was new to you, you know this feeling, you’ve read it in books: one to many times already but feeling it was another level, one you cannot help yourself but deny.

A bitter taste fell out of your mouth as you listened to the comms as you sneak in inside a control system for a mission, you could hear it—in the comms how Stark, Barnes, Romanoff, and Carter were blending in naturally in the crowd: it was a common hideout, to be honest, a terrorist stealing vibranium and having the operation under a bar-party casino, what a common hideout, it wouldn’t bother you; in reality, it should not bother you—you were HYDRA’s weapon once, undercover and sneak in mission is nothing but a piece of cake.

That would be the case, if you don’t feel a conflicting emotion in your chest—god, you hear it, the little chuckles the fell out of Carter’s mouth as you heard Bucky’s line on the end, he sound so out of character, out of touch, way different as he interacts with you. Cursing under your breath, you entered the camera room.

Without warning to the team, you successfully put the camera in your control, protecting Wanda, Sam, and Rogers from the security’s grasp. In that, you heard Tony’s chuckle.

“There you go, Secret Service, everyone..” He compliments you as he continues his comms. “Told you, you’re fit for the role—I’m great at role assigning after all.” In some cases, you would thank him —but your mind brushes things as Romanoff’s response to the comms was blurry as you recall the planning earlier.

“It’s set in Europe.” Sharon Carter's voice informed the team, as you, Yelena, and Natasha were preparing the things for the mission. As the information was given by Stark and Carter, you waited for further instruction—thus, leading to assigning roles. It wouldn’t matter actually, you were a spy, this would be a piece of cake: but then again, you bit off on something you can’t chew.

“Carter and Barnes, you two will be the undercover Mr. and Mrs. Williams, when we get control of the camera systems, that’s when Rogers, Wilson, and Wanda can come in. That leads to Yelena for going in the vault as me and Ms. Romanoff along with Williams taking charge of what’s in the casino.” Stark looked at Natasha and Rogers for confirmation, they both nodded.

But you scanned the fake invitations made by Stark for him and Natasha; for Barnes and Carter: The Williams—a new feeling burns within you, but you carry on—for all you see, was Barnes already talking to Carter after the planning—moments like that: you find another reason why you should deny the wanted warmth spreading in your cheek when you talk to Sergeant.

“Hey, secret service, talk to me–” Stark’s pull you out of your trance, you immediately replied. “Yeah? I’m here..” Stark chuckled, as he informed to prepare for a change in plans.

“Copy that.” A sigh left your mouth and a familiar voice—a softer one than what you once heard in HYDRA’s—”Everything okay, сахарный тростник?”

Everything okay, sugarcane? In different circumstances, that would have the cheesiest smile out of you, how a stupid toy turned into sugarcane. But things are different, way different—everything was out of touch, instead a monotone left your lips. “Everything’s fine, soldier.”

“You were not responding for a minute, you sure?”

In his words, you knew Steve wasn’t joking when he shared that Barnes have girls lining up for him in the 40s, knowing damn well, if you existed that time—you would too but as you listen to him, you notice the subtle different tone he uses with Carter, way different when it comes to you, it stings but you already foreseen this: it’s never gonna work, you stole everything from him for fucks sake. It will never work out. Bucky will never figure it out.

Before you could respond, a security breach alarm was ringing the entire place, it was from Yelena’s position—the things happened too fast, you immediately went to Yelena for back-up, which you two gladly got out. Everything was a mess, as far as you can remember, you and Yelena took some enemies, it was an odd pairing as Stark teased in the comms but as you fight, a lingering and gnawing feeling broods in your chest, it wasn’t the fight nor the team’s safety.

It was you, you’re worried about you and the damn stupid butterflies in your stomach. Your mind drifts that even in this different life, you still can’t have what you want to have—unprofessional, sloppy, neglectful, and hideous: as you heard a gunshot and a seething pain in your abdomen, so much for HYDRA’s favored leverage.

As you felt the pain, the adrenaline coursing to your body made you fight more of the enemies, but the ringing in your ear never left, maybe it was the anxiety or maybe it was the comms, or maybe it was Yelena begging the team to go back to quinjet because you’ve been shot—it would be tolerable, the pain would be tolerable until in the comms you heard a pleading, longing, a lost voice.

“Has anyone seen Carter?” It was Bucky, god, he sound so worried, so distress, that made you wince even the bullet’s pain was nothing, this was much worse, you stumbled your walk as you throw the comms away, luckily Yelena was with you, after a moment, the Falcon and Iron Man carried you and Yelena back to the quinjet, as a limping Sharon Carter and getting assisted by Bucky met your view as Sam made you sit.

Wanda immediately used her ability to heal you but you pushed her hand away. “I’m okay, Wanda. I can take it—look over Sharon and Yelena, yeah?” You smiled at her but as she was about to protest, Steve nudged her shoulder as Steve sat next to you. “My bad, Captain..” You gave Rogers a smile, a masked one—god, you’re in so much pain.

“...You okay?” Stark snickered as Steve sent him a glare. “Rogers, I am fine. You should see the other guy—” but before you can continue, Natasha cut you off.

“You were distracted out there. You were not responding for a minute; you got shot. Want to tell us, what happened?” There she is, the Black Widow, you play with air in your mouth as you look at Steve and glance at Barnes talking to Sharon as Wanda heals her injury. Normally, Natasha would tease you about it but as she notices the subtle glance. She waited for your answer.

“Was not used in that set-up, I guess.” Natasha gave a look to you, call it pity, sadness, but as you stood up, watching as the fabric that Yelena tied in your abdomen was pooling red, you used Steve's shoulders to lift yourself up. “Sorry, was distracted, it won't happen again.”

Steve was about to guide you but you shrugged him off as you walked in the little bathroom in quinjet. Not-knowing an emotion filled eyes was longing behind your back—how a pair of cerulean colored eyes is watching behind you. The jet was quiet, not because of the tight tension, but a worried one. So, Yelena carried the mood: reminding everyone that the mission is a success, but it wasn’t for Bucky, you were bleeding; he wasn’t there—for him, the mission would rather fail than to see you wincing in every step you make.

You removed your clothes as you removed the cloth that Yelena used to stop the bleeding, you eyed the injury as you knew this was a bit worse than you expect it, with running water, you cleaned it—scrambling the medicine cabinet behind the mirror, applying gauze—-you can ask Banner or Maximoff to look on it, for now, this’ll do.

Few weeks back in the compound, it felt like the time didn’t move. You were pissing off at HYDRA wishing they inserted the serum at you too—so, the healing process would be much faster than you bed-rotting in your room—but you guess, that was better; with Yelena being the closest things you have in sister–she told you everything. Especially the blonde woman hanging out with the terminator.

She tells stories about them as she sometimes passes out in your room—you love Yelena, there’s no doubt, you thanked her every time she and Natasha would look at you as if you live with them. In the middle of the night, you got out of your bed as you fixed Yelena’s blanket next to you—-your light footsteps left your room, as you went to the kitchen.

You wanted to make tea, but the heating pain from your abdomen, your movements were slow—it would take—“Sam would’ve ran sixteen laps and your tea is not even close to done.” Of course, the Captain’s voice. He was in his night outfit as you chuckled and nodded. “A little hand, then?” you asked the old man.

That night, Steve Rogers made you tea as you watched and sat on the counter. “I can feel you staring at me…” Rogers uttered as you shook your head. “I never got to thank you…” You added as he placed a fresh tea on the counter as he also has one too.

As you sip, a smile left your face—you liked the tea he made. “Peggy taught me in the 40s.” You nodded as he told you how Peggy taught him—before you knew Steve, you thought he just got lucky being Captain America, but with him sitting and studying your look: he’s also a human being that falled in the wrong path of time. With that, you looked at him.

“Does it get easier?” You asked him, it was a broad question. But, somehow, all the speeches he made for the team had the same weight when said: “I lived on ice for 70 years, it’ll eventually get harder.” Not the answer you wanted, but somehow, you knew.

“....but you have us. Eventually, it’ll be okay, not easy, but okay.” He sip his tea as he pulls the picture of Peggy in the compass he carries.

“You must’ve really liked her…” You added–as he nodded, acting shyly—as he tells his story, but not the one written in the museum, somehow, the longing feeling in your chest was bigger, how he talks about Bucky, is so different from the Bucky you know, it was painful—but at this point, you mirrored Rogers, not missing how his eyes shimmered when he thought of Peggy. With a cup of tea on your hand, you figured it out: you absolutely, without a doubt:

You love James Buchanan Barnes.

Your heart clenches as you settle with the realization—“I’ve seen how you look at Bucky..” Cases like this, you would wanna talk to Natasha first, but, knowing Steve would not let it go, you continued—it’s your way to thank him for the tea, afterall.

“I do, I felt that, months ago—realized it, now. I saw how you talk about Peggy yet I think about how I talked about him.” You chuckled. “Guess his 40s charm never left, but, who would take me—why would I bother with this? I hurt him, stole everything from him and now we're a bunch of agents and icons, there’s no room for that—especially ... .especially with me.” Steve listened intently.

“Pepper and Tony would say otherwise.” You raise your head and meet his gaze. “Barton and his wife would not agree too. Parker and MJ would argue with you about it. Wanda and Vision would explain themselves to you—” You laughed, as you get his point.

“It’s not the same, Rogers—I hurt him. A million times, stole who he is, used what he is—how would he take me?” A bitter chuckle left your lips as cleared your throat, you stood up not wanting to talk more. “Thanks for the tea…” As you closed the door in your room, Steve sighed as he looked at the man standing in the dark corner of the room.

“You heard her…” Steve got the cups and placed them on the sink, as the man in the corner stepped out. “How would you take her..?” Steve quotes your question. The man lingered his blue eyes in the door of your room.

“All of her.”

It’s true, Barnes should still hate you—but, all at once, next to you, he feels like a child. Like, all the things he felt was damaged within him, felt undamaged—felt like you seen him in his bullshit: the 40s one, the Sergeant one, the Winter Soldier one, the White Wolf one, the James—the Bucky: you take them all, so, he would be a fool not to take all of you too.

Maybe, in the height of it all, 40s Bucky would never forgive you but—in his heart, a growing hope—thanking the stars, the pain, the stitches, the loss—for all of that: he thanked that he was still alive in hope for this love.

Steve nodded and looked at his friend— “Talk to her, Buck.” Bucky nodded, not saying anything but feeling everything—with a soft look at Steve, he realized that he got it—he understood it, that in your shoulder at the library: everything felt right: you hurted him, that is true, god, he hated you.

But in the dreaded past, meeting you, knowing you was the tattooed dream etched in his mind, that inside of the Sergeant, White Wolf, grumpy old man: was his inner child, wishing to spend the rest of his days until the time lets—god, he loves you.

The next day, alarms were all over the compound, you walked out of your room—seeing Tony and Steve in their suits; a missing cerulean eyes. “Where’s Bucky?” Sam immediately went to you, as he tried to push your back into your room.

“You’re still injured, let them handle–this–” You pushed his arm. “Don’t bullshit me, Sam—I am fine, where’s Barnes?” you repeated but as Sam was about to say something, Stark was at your room’s door. “Power Broker got him—” Without a word, you grabbed your stuff and changed your clothes to the uniform Stark made for you.

“Hey, hey, what do you think you’re doing?” Sam’s voice was louder as Tony did his best to stop you too. “Secret Service, listen to me, you’re still injured—you have to stay–”

“Stay?! I will not stay here, Stark, Bucky is—he’s not here—I’m not gonna stand here and hope you guys get him back! What if Zola found him! What if—” Stark cut you off. “We’ll bring him back—your Barnes.” In that you calm down, as you nodded and sat on your bed. As Stark left your room, Sam looked over at you.

“Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“...I’m gonna follow them..” With that you clutched your bed sheets and begged to all the heavens of the universe to bring him back. Your love back.

James Barnes was sitting in a familiar chair, a chair that reminded him of his past, reminded him of all the blood—it’s happening again, he’s gonna lose all his memories again, he wanted to fight the doctors surrounding him but the drugs in his system were blurring everything.

His metal hand was strapped as well as his chest and feet—he felt helpless. “Ah, you’re awake.” A voice, Sharon—she visited Bucky’s room last night, for whatever reason, Bucky thought Sharon needed help but as he turned his back, all he felt was the cold floor and woke up with the doctors all over the place with him tied up on the chair.

“Sharon, what the hell is wrong with you?” His voice is bitter, in pain, god, it’s all coming back— “Wrong with me? I am this, солдат.” Soldier. It is different when you say it, that’s the first thing Bucky noticed. “And I am selling you to the market. You are a great deal, Winter Soldier.”

Of course, Bucky would be used again—the machine starts to produce a sound—a distinct familiar sound, is it always gonna end up like this? But in his throat, he can only plead—he felt like a kid, not the same kid that wishes for you, the kid that was begging to be freed, it felt so weird, familiar, painful, to be back here.

As the machine covers his left eye as he grunts in pain—he thinks of you. He wished he memorized you, he wished he knew how to make your tea, he wished he would remember your words, he wished he was back in the shore again as you ask for forgiveness as he eats the sugarcane, how he wished he was eating at the diner with the jukebox again; how he wished he took you to a dance.

Then, it was nothing.

“Солдат?” Sharon called out a name—Soldier?

Against the dark room, a soldier spoke: “Я готов ответить.” The Winter Soldier was ready to comply.

“Tell me, it’s not you on the comms, Secret Service.” As Stark and Rogers rush inside the building, which was supposed to be a duo-mission, they hear a crackling noise on their comms. “That would be so boring if it wasn’t, right, Stark?” You chuckled, before Rogers can even argue about it—Stark already did.

“You stubborn–You just had your stitches! We’ll handle this! Stay put in your location–you—” But you cut him off.

“Even if you have stitches, Stark! If Potts is there—you’ll do it too, so, let me help…” Stark and Steve sighed, they knew they couldn’t stop you. After Stark sorting you out, you get on the other side of the building while the other two lurk on the other side. It was a dark building, as you successfully sneak in: you immediately scan the area.

The dark room makes you think of HYDRA years ago: it was triggering, your skin feels cold—if you’re feeling like this, what more to Bucky. You need to find him fast, but the pulsing in your head, also doesn’t help, maybe it was the anxiety or maybe when Sam tried to stop you earlier.

“I told you, I won’t let you!” Sam groaned as he blocked your path, for a thousand times. “Sam, please, Cap and Stark need us! They need me, we have to help them!” You fought him, but you knew he was holding back because of your stitches.

“Work with me, Sam, please..” You pleaded but he got you in a headlock, as you calmed down. He loosened when you tapped his hand. “Please….It’s James. I don’t want him to go through that again, it’s the only way—only thing I can do, Sam—”

Sam cared about Bucky and you knew that, at this moment, Sam hates that he cares about you too. “Fine, but—” You smiled at him— “I won’t tell Steve.” In that Sam just nodded and let you go.

Never in your life, thought you would let your feet touch the casket for a man—a man whose heart and past are all broken because of you. You never thought you would see the day why people fought lively in the war because they have someone to go home to, you never thought you would see the day where all can be damned—just not you and Barnes.

The other side of the building is thoroughly occupied by fights: Stark and Rogers are really pushing through—while you see a laboratory, you immediately sneak inside. As Stark updated their situation of being occupied in a fight, you entered the lab. You finally saw Bucky, in the same chair, the first time you saw him. You were angry, pissed, and everything is being in the last line of your moral defense.

“Oh, Bucky..” you immediately went to the buttons and let the machine let James go, but he remained seated. “Barnes, we have to go—come on–” You checked his face if he was injured, or even concussed, but all you met was a familiar eye, an unwanted one, the one would burn in your guilt—In his dilated eyes, the Winter Soldier is back. It’s not Barnes, not Bucky—HYDRA’s favorite: the one that killed people without blinking. With such hope, you pulled him up but to no avail, Carter’s voice broke through.

“Soldier, attack.”

The Winter Soldier immediately slapped you away, causing you to hit the wall—if it wasn’t for Tony and Shuri’s invention in your suit—you would’ve died but you met the Winter Soldier’s eyes again, this time—you stood at the same spot of his victims before, you knew what they meant: for the first time, you were scared. As Stark had scanned the area from his location, he asked you to stand down and wait for them—but the comms he was giving was meeting the cold floor.

You look at the Winter Soldier. “You really wanna do this, Sharon?” Sharon snickered as she cockily revealed her plan selling the Winter Soldier to the underground. “You’re nothing like Peggy, not a bunch.” Sharon scrunched her nose.

“Because Peggy never stepped up—she could have all this and yet she stayed at the stupid camp. But me, after the government go up against me, I finally find the purpose—”

“What? Like a criminal dealer?” Despite you tensing up, to fight against the Winter Soldier up—you snarked up a reply to Sharon. “That’s lame, you know, if I were you, I would go bi—”

“Shut up! Like you know better, you better stop pretending to be one of them because…you are just like me.” You stared at her; back at the brooding Winter Soldier. “Or not. Soldier…kill.” In that The Winter Soldier immediately attacked you.

For a while, you were able to keep up with his fighting style, you were once a HYDRA after all but a lingering warm feeling scattered in your chest: you can keep up with him because you spar together, you catch up with his speed. Despite the Winter Soldier’s attacking skills, you didn’t fight back, you just put yourself in defense and you tried to whisper words that would trigger his memory. You hoped Steve would arrive and pull the Soldier out of trance, as the Soldier pinned you to the wall, you finally attacked back—you kicked him as he stepped away.

“Soldat, ты меня бесишь.” The soldier grunted, he knew what you meant—he was pissing you off. In that his attack became more aggressive; You tried to recall all the memories, even the one Steve told you but none of them reached the Soldier. He kept punching and kicking you, until his hand hit your stitches, you fell on the ground as you clutch yourself in pain—the soldier reached for the gun, with the last strength you kicked the gun away.

It fell on the floor as you grabbed it and aimed it at the Soldier. “Stay back, Soldier.” Yet, for the first time, your hand shakes holding a gun. Without abandon, the Soldier still charged, pushing you down to the floor—with an intention to kill,he grabbed a knife but instead of you pulling the trigger, you felt the knife getting deeper in your shoulder, the Winter Soldier twisted the knife, but he flinched when he heard you:

“Full circles…” You winced. “I am really sorry, Bucky…” Suddenly, the Soldier heard the shore, the sweet taste was familiar on his lips, your swiss knife on his hand—Bucky.

He pulled his hand away as he stared at you. “....Sugarcane..” In that a bitter chuckle left your mouth as you nod. “Barnes..” You felt yourself tear up as you reached his cheek and caressed it. “You’re back…finally, you’re back..” Bucky was tense, he knew what he did but the way you looked at him, melted his inside. He was about to say his apology but a loud explosion occurred. He used his body to shield you as he carried you to the side.

He saw the blood in your suit, as you slowly got dizzy. “Hey, hey, don’t you dare. Sweets, come on–”Bucky tapped your cheek as he saw in the explosion was Stark and Steve, Steve threw his shield to Bucky as Bucky catched it he warned: “Steve! We gotta go, she lost a lot of blood.” Even Tony felt Bucky’s panic.

“The quinjet is up north the mountain.” Steve said as he and Stark went to catch Sharon Carter. Bucky’s hand was dipping in your shoulder and waist as he carried you back to the quinjet, he kept checking if you were still breathing—he prayed, he was shaking in fear: he can’t lose you, especially not like this. His breathing was ragged as he reached the jet. He was hoping Wanda was there but all there were the buttons of the jet.

He placed you on a chair as he grabbed the medical kit in a cabinet, he immediately sat on the floor and remove the suit—your stitches thorn and a bleeding shoulder, he was mad at himself, how did he even let it happen, he should not have hurt you, he should—

“Calm down, James…” He felt your hands on his cheek again, grounding him in his panic. He immediately shook his head. “No, no, I did this, I was—”

“You didn’t have a choice…” you smiled. “Besides, I think we’re fair now.” You joked but the giggle didn’t leave Bucky’s lips—-is he going to lose you too? His hand reached for your head as he ran his hand in your hair. “I should’ve asked you to dance with me, that night….” He whispered slowly.

As you nodded, relaxing in his touch. “I guess you owe me…”

“I do, I definitely do, sweets.”

Bucky was reading George Owell’s 1984—despite being a great book: it seemed a tale of HYDRA, he read intently in the library. After a while, he looked over the loft, recalling the memory when he fell asleep next to you.

“Hey, sweets?” His voice called out, noticing the afternoon turned into night, knowing they drifted in the loft, next to each other. “Yes, Barnes?”

“We’ll read 1984 tomorrow?” He asked but neither of them moved, the proximity within them is warm, it’s home. With a chuckle, a reply left you: “If you’re up for it…”

After a while, he left the library with a longing look on his face as he carried the book, adoring the shared memory, longing for it, wishing he can experience it again—

— Suddenly, he met you carrying new bandages and band-aids. “Didn’t Banner tell you to stay on the bed?” He asked, immediately rushing to you.

“....Did he?” you asked, as you looked like a kid that stole a candy bar. “Well, Banner and Stark went out and my bandages are getting itchy so—I kinda, need to change them.”

“Couldn’t Natasha or Yelena help you?” You nodded. “I can’t find them and they’re really itchy, Barnes.” You walked away from him as he held your shoulder. “Let’s change it then, sweets.”

Barnes made you sit on the sink of the bathroom as he changed the bandages in your abdomen, as you winced lightly. “This okay, sweets?” You nodded as he purely focused on the bandage. Later, reached another batch of bandages, as you see the guilt look in his face: as he changed the one in your shoulder. “Barnes…” You knew he wasn’t listening, he’s probably blaming himself in his head again.

“Bucky?” you called out, this time, he looked at you. As you reached for his metal arm, he pulled away but then you pulled it as you felt the metal texture. “I’m sorry…I hurted you.” He sighed as you held the wrist of his metal arm. “Guess we’re even—” He shook his head, not liking your humor.

“There could’ve been worse! I could’ve killed you—I could’ve lost you and it’s gonna be my fault–” In his panic, his right hand lightly hit your shoulder—but as he was about to say sorry again, you grabbed both of his cheeks. “We’re alright, Bucky. We’re okay…” You muttered, as you rested your forehead into his.

“We’re okay.” You both muttered, as he calmed down, he continued to change your bandage on your shoulder, as his body heat was radiating into you. As he wrapped and cut the last bandage—you both stared at each other. His eyes were blue like you remembered, as his eyes linger in your eyes yet longer in your lips.

Suddenly, it’s just him and you—above anything else, he kissed you.

To which you smiled as you kiss him back, in the soft edge of the compound, it’s just him and you, his hand rested in your waist as you hold him in his shoulder—you kissed him as if you were memorizing him and he kissed you like he would want to keep your lips on a bottle so, he can get addicted and taste you anytime he wants.

He pushed further as you pulled away and you chuckled. “I thought the 40s were supposed to bring them on date first…” Bucky eyes glistened with joy— “My bad, sweets, you looked like you wanted to kiss me.”

As he kissed you lightly again, lingering a little longer—as he pulled away he tucked your hair in your ear. “I suppose I owe you a dance, sweets?” You smiled as you nodded, as you opened your arms for embrace as he indulged in your warmth. “Only if you change my bandages, until I get better?”

He nodded as he kissed your forehead: “You don’t have to ask me, sweets, I got you, always.”

“....You always call me that, after I said sorry to you…sweets, I’m not sweet, I’m a spy like Natasha and Yelen—”

“The sugarcane, sweets. The sugarcane, I still remember that was the only thing we ate that time—yet, even when I was mad at you, you still got me sugarcane, it was really…sweet of you.” He whispered as you laughed. “Steve wasn’t lying when you got your words.”

He lightly kissed your injured shoulder and muttered a sorry to it. As you two hugged again, you can’t help but hum the song from the diner—playing in the jukebox: I’ve never been in love before—but as you smiled and relaxed at the sink—it felt different, it felt more human—warmest than ever been.

Upon in a different side of life, you never knew it will turn out like this, watching stars with Barnes, holding hands, dancing in the rhythm, planning what’s for dinner with him;—despite the guilt brooding in each of your chest about what could’ve been in the past the future remains uncertain, as the old man said it will eventually be okay; maybe there was hate or maybe regret: but for a man who woke up 75 years later, he was finally certain as he decided that in each time he will fall in love..

— it's always going to be you.

⚘ masterlist 1 | 2 | 3 ₊˚⊹♡ taglist: @yesiamthatwierd, @bitchimasnake-sss, @cjand10, @jayflwr, @buckys-wintersoldier, @buck-buck-buckaroo, @the-winter-spider, @buckys-other-punkk, @mostlymarvelgirl, @winterslove1917. @winterfrosted, @the-winter-spider @nayala, @sluttylittlewaistenthusiast, @samthemarvelfan, @sinner-as-saint

:please message me if you do not wish to be tagged! <3

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alacetor-the-duckies-deer · 4 months ago

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I have this headcanon for Alastor's back story where he's trans, and just as himself, as he is in the show, even as a kid. So his parents sent him of to a convent, were upon ww1 breaking out in his late teens, he ran away, forged a new identity as a man, got found out once he was already over seas, blackmailed a superior into letting him stay on, where he was introduced to radio communication, and the rest is history.

But all that to say, I like to then imagine, whenever anyone tells him something mildly outlandish, but definitely true, he likes to respond with "Yes, Vox, and I took a vow of celibacy when I was a catholic nun"

To which of course people think, "so you don't belive me? I mean but aren't you a virgin? Are you not????"

And of course, this never gets asked because who's gonna ask The Radio Demom about his Sexy Life.

Angel Dust that's who.

I imagine him doing an interview on Al's Show, just a mix of publicity for them both, hanging out because they're friends, and it's all a big middle finger to the Vee's.

Maybe it's pride month and so they were planning some talk about that, Alastor joking about a possible comming out, even though its plenty well know Alastor is some where on the ace spectrum to anyone with eyes.

They get on the topic somehow, Angel says something like, "I never laid myself across the bar like that! Second set of arms at most! Never my butt, never mind my legs! not after the first time!"

"Mh-hm. You got desperate in your flirting, and I took a vow of celibacy, when I was a nun. We all do silly things, Angel."

"Well, maybe I've laid out on the pool table, but it makes for good pictures. Anyway, I been meaning to ask you about that."

"About being a nun?

"No," angel laughs, plays it off, thinking he's joking. "About your being ace and all. No pressure, but like, you really never even wanted to try?"

"No, I find it quite repulsive. The idea even,"

"You don't watch nothin'? Read nothing either?"

"Ha! No! The filthy little novel Sister Amillia sneaked in the once was quite enough- are you okay Angel?"

Angel had infact just chocked on his latte. "Wait? Sister Amillia? Sneaked in? To where!?"

"The convent, Angel. I was 14, she was 16. Wonderful woman, taught me how to handle a knife, she left shortly after the novel was discovered- Sister Tabitha was as squeaky a little rat as she looked- never saw Amillia again, though."

"Wait, sorry. You were a nun, like, actually? What the fuck?"

One of the little lights that says they have a caller lit up, but Alastor ignore it for now. "Yes, Angel, do keep up."

"Wait, so like that nun costume you wear on halloween?" Angel blows right past the fact Alastor just came out as trans, because yeah. Didnt see it comming but, the trains already wizzing by, and more importantly- "Is that like your actual nun costume?"

"Ha! No, I flung that horrid thing in a garbage can on my way to the enlistment office when I was 17."

"Enlistment?" Angels begining to see what Alastor meant when he said this episode was going to be a unique experience for his listeners at the start of the braodcast. "Like world War 1, right? You were alive for that..."

"Yes, I figured with all the confusion one little girl-"

Angel's phone goes off. It's Val. Angel hits ignore.

"Fuck off Val, I'm off today" Angel says into his mic.

But they get interrupted again and again until Angel turns his phone off.

At which point all twelve of the little light that indicate the show had callers on the line, light up.

"Ah fuck. What does he want that bad? Can you just answer it real quick?"

Alastor flips a switch and answers.

"The fuck you want Val-"

"I'm not calling for you!" It's Vox on the other end, his voice booming from the speaker "Alastor! Are you fucking serious? You were a fucking nun?"

"Yes, Vox." He says with faux patience. "My goodness, did you all stuff your ears with cotton this morn-"

"So you DID actually take a vow of Celibacy? The other day at the meeting during my presentation, you said "that'll work, Vox, sure- and I took a vow-"

"Yes. I was there."

"And!?!"

"Celibacy, among other things. If this is a dig at my sexuality than-"

"Nah fuck that, hang on I'm doing math! Okay you were born in 1901, makes you 17 in 1918, yeah that tracks. Okay so 2024 make you 123, minus the 17 years to be conservative, thats 106 yeah?"

"I was 15 when I took that vow, and under threat of being institutionalized, if that's what you're getting at-"

"108! Ha! Oh my God! 108 years! That's gotta be a record!"

"What are you getting at Vox?"

"You took a vow!" Vox screams through his laughter. "All the pomp and circumstance! On consecrated ground! before god!? To abstain from sex! And even here in hell, were sin and blasphemy are rampant and free-"

"Careful Vox, your televangelist is showing-"

"Who gives a fuck!? You're the one whos upheld their vow to God for over a century like some devout saint!"

Angel and Alastor sit there staring at eachother while Vox laughs his head off around them

"Saint Alastor the Abstinent! The pantron Saint of Virgi-"

Alastor hangs up. "Well that was informative!" Alastor chirps "Well, What's to be done about this? Hm, Angel?"

And for some reason, an unholy one, surely, the first thing out of Angel's mouth is "I could suck you dick? If that- would count?"

And it's a testament to how far they've come as friends, or pooooossbily Alastor's nerves, or maybe his sheer unwavering bravado, but Alastor only bursts out laughing, shaking his head as he get out between laughter "I don't- have one!"

And then they're both laughing and laughing and laughing, and eventually they calm down, and Alastor gets a thoughtful look. "Though, Vox did have one good point."

"Oh?"

"That does have to be a recorded, at least among sinners. Why! I very well might have redeemed myself! We should certainly bring this up with Sera at the next conference!"

And then their off both laughing again, imaging Serra's face when she realises she's going to have to look into yet more research onto the workings of redemption from Heaven's end.

#hazbin hotel #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #the radio demon #alastor #alacetor #asexual alastor #ace alastor #angel dust hazbin hotel #angel dust #angel hazbin hotel #angel hazbin #huskerdust #vox hazbin hotel #the vees #trans alastor #nun alastor

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whipped-for-kpop-fics · 6 months ago

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Down To Clown - M.YG

💦Who; Min Yoongi (BTS) x reader 💦What; Smut, producer/idol au/verse, friends to fuckers 💦Wordcount; 14kish 💦Warnings; they are both bi/pan, profanity, dirty talk, switch yoongi, switch reader, anal fingering(m), crying with pleasure, coming untouched, sex toys, lingerie, oral (m&f), marks, pegging, anal sex, multiple orgasms, oral fixation, biting, fingering, mentions of being infertile through choice, sex without a condom, penetrative sex, piv sex, cockwarming, somnophilia, choking, squirting, minor blood, mentions of knife play(it is not explored in this story)

Summary; You ask to finger one of your closest friends, he says yes and things get real fun after that.

Minors do NOT interact, which means reblogging/commenting on this story. I WILL block any account that interacts without an age indicator in the bio. -2024 Masterlist- Ao3 link

A/N- this was actually started 3 years ago with an OC so that i could get out my fantasy of topping yoongles, which means this was extremely self-indulgent. I just want to make Yoongi cry okay I've edited to the best of my abilities to change it from an OC to reader but if I've missed any pieces, pretend otherwise, thanks <3 @wonuvs enjoy, sweetheart 💖

Edited 25/10/24 - just grammar, formatting etc

The dark-haired rapper looks over exasperatedly at the third call of his name. "What?" He huffs when you don't say anything from where you're sitting cross-legged on the couch and instead choose to hold his gaze with wide, round eyes that he would call innocent if he didn't know you better than that by now.

"You've been with guys, right?" You question slowly.

"Yeah?"

"And you've bottomed?"

"You already know this. Get to the point."

"I'm working on it," you pout, absently tracing your fingers over the strings of the guitar laid across your lap. "So, you've had fingers in your ass?"

"Jesus, what the fuck?" He sputters in genuine shock at your out-of-the-blue question.

"You said get to the point!"

"I didn't think it would be about my ass,"

"It's not, really, just...asses in general. The male ass. With fingers. Guys getting fingered."

"Were you watching porn while hanging out with me?" He deadpans unimpressed.

"No." He gives you a disbelieving look. "Well not intentionally. I was on Twitter minding my own business and suddenly, bam! There was a gif of a guy getting fingered."

"So, you decided to watch it?"

"Yes."

"Despite the fact that you claim to not watch porn?"

"I don't. Never been interested." You shrug, and as much as Yoongi wants to argue and point out that people who aren't interested in porn don't watch porn gifs, he can't because he can see that you are being entirely honest.

"Right, okay." He lets out a breath, it sounds suspiciously like an exasperated sigh. "So, you watched this gif and decided to bring up my sex life?"

"Well, I've always been curious about fingering a guy like, what it feels like and the prostate sounds interesting like can you actually feel it? It's wild, man."

"You want to finger a guy?" He gawps, surprised by the revelation. You just nod. "Seriously?"

"Yeah. Originally, I just wanted to peg a guy, I wanna know if I'd be any good with a dick and something about fucking a guy is really hot."

"I don't even know what to say," he murmurs truthfully. You shrug and run your hands over the guitar again, which draws his attention. "Well...your nails are short at least," he comments quietly.

"Easier for playing guitar and with myself."

"Holy fuck, you can't just..." He exhales and rubs his hands over his face.

"Sorry. I'm frustrated and my filter always vanishes when I'm like this."

"Frustrated about wanting to finger a guy?" He questions, dropping his hands onto his thighs carelessly to look at you again.

"Well, yeah, I guess but I meant sexually frustrated, like horny."

"Fuck me," Yoongi murmurs softly, but due to the lack of activity going on in the room you hear it loud and clear.

"I don't have a strap-on," you reply with a frown that looks oddly genuine.

"A strap-on...wait, I wasn't like, asking," he rushes out, cheeks flushed as he understands what you mean.

"Oh," your frown turns further downwards. "I'd probably be bad anyway."

"I've seen you dance, you can move your hips," he admits gruffly.

"Oh...in that case, your loss. I'd make you cum really good."

"Shut up," Yoongi grunts and shuffles in his seat while diverting his gaze elsewhere.

"Sorry." You remove the guitar from your lap to prop it back on its stand beside the couch without even getting up. Then, you stretch out and slouch slightly so that you can rest your head on the back of the couch with your bare feet planted firmly on the floor, legs spread in a way that your mother always scolded you for as it is 'unlady like'. "It's for the best anyway, I don't want to get sexually involved with someone who would just be thinking of someone else the whole time, you know?"

"What? Why are you assuming I'd be doing that?" He squares his eyes almost accusingly at you while crossing his arms over his chest.

"Because you're not attracted to me like that," your response is simple, easy, as if it is common knowledge; a fact of the world you had learned a long time ago.

"Who says?" You raise a challenging eyebrow. "I'm not blind, you're hot as fuck."

"Doesn't mean you're down to clown though."

"Not if you keep talking like that," he huffs, sitting back further in his chair.

You straighten a little with hope beginning to sparkle in your eyes. "That sounds like you'd at least consider it if I used other phrasing."

Yoongi says nothing and keeps his lips pressed together. The smirk that lifts your lips tells him that he's about to meet a version of you that he has only seen in the dreams he will never admit to waking up hard from- sometimes even shaking and coming down from an orgasm.

You sit up until you're fully upright, though your legs remain spread and Yoongi hates how it does something for him, how much it does for him. He has never before experienced a cocky female who isn't afraid to hold herself in a stereotypical male way, and honestly, it's the best of both worlds for him.

"Yoongi, Yoonie, babyboy," you coo, and he scoffs at the final term if only to hide and deny the blush winding up his neck. "Will you let me fuck you? Can I put my fingers in that pretty, perky ass of yours until you cum? Fuck, I bet you'd look so good being edged, so overwhelmed that you can't help but cry and babble absolute fucking nonsense while begging to cum," you murmur out, dark eyes growing heavier by the second.

"Fuck," Yoongi whispers, dick twitching in his boxers.

You don't respond and simply lean your right elbow on the backrest to lean your head against your fist. You just watch him, waiting; so patient for a response.

Almost as if you're playing with him, taunting, teasing, offering him the best seat in the house if only he is brave enough to admit to wanting it, and taking the first step.

Part of him is certain that you aren't doing that at all, that you are genuinely just waiting for him to think it over. That you're not willing to rush him or put any pressure on him to answer in a particular way. But a brand new part of him doesn't have a fucking clue what you're capable of in the bedroom.

After a tense handful of moments where you simply hold each other's gaze while Yoongi's mind runs wild hidden safely behind his eyes, he turns back to his desk.

Even though you're disappointed, you had honestly expected as much, so you don't stop to sulk or pout and instead reach back towards the guitar. You barely have your hand around the neck when you hear a drawer close a little too forcefully, especially as it's by Yoongi's hand, so you look back up and find that his computer programs are closed and only a music app is open. You release your grasp on the instrument and settle back to watch curiously.

Yoongi finds a playlist that you two often listen to; something full of smooth beats and low voices.

As the first song starts, he gets up and turns. He has something in his hands but it's hidden, at least until he has crossed the small distance between you to toss it onto the couch seat on your right. You can't help but look down and find a little bottle of lube on the cushion.

"If you're serious about wanting to try, I'm down to clown," he speaks, drawing your attention back. He's nervous and embarrassed, it's obvious to you even if he's trying his best to hide it.

"Most definitely." You nod and straighten up even further before patting your lap firmly. "C'mere."

"You want me on you?"

"You have no idea," you almost snort with your amusement, but hold it back. You pat your thigh again with your left hand while your right picks up the bottle.

"Oh right, uh, okay. Uhm, lemme just..." He quickly unzips his jeans to shuffle out of them and kick them aside, before moving forward to press his left knee on the outside of your right thigh. "I'm heavier than I look," he warns while gingerly placing his right knee on the other side of your thighs, one hand pushed against the backrest beside your shoulder for stability.

You roll your eyes and grab his hips to pull his body onto your lap. Yoongi hiccups on an inhale in surprise at the sudden action which leaves him perched on your stable thighs with wide eyes. "I can handle it, don't worry."

"You should know," he rushes out quickly, causing your hands to halt where they have started to run over his thighs; curious to explore the skin you have never seen exposed on him before. "I already cleaned up, I do every shower-"

"I know."

"H-how?"

"You told me when drunk once that you like to always be prepared to get dicked down. I figured out the rest due to the length of your showers, babe."

"Oh...right..." He chews on his bottom lip, which almost matches the tint on his cheeks. "Oh well, I was going to say that you should always make sure your guy is cleaned first because you know...asshole."

"Yeah, I got it," you grin and squeeze his thigh supportively, which only makes him jolt. "Are you sure you want to do this, Yoongi? I really won't be offended if you don't. I don't want you to be uncomfortable or anything."

"No, no, I do. S'just...we've been friends for a while now and I never thought anything like this would happen between us. And I haven't been touched by anyone but myself in so long it kind of feels like the first time."

"I'll go slow."

"I know. I trust you. Wouldn't be doing this otherwise," he huffs out a small laugh.

"I'm glad. I trust you too." You smile at each other for a moment; allowing the moment to get used to what you're planning to do, even only a little. "So, Mr Min, you're in charge here, I've no fucking clue what I'm doing so you kind of need to lead me."

"Oh, right, yeah." He inhales, then pushes up a little to shimmy his boxers down under the crease where his ass meets his thighs, it allows him to keep his crotch hidden by the material just in case his t-shirt doesn't. He isn't quite prepared for one of his closest friends to see his flaccid dick, no matter what you're about to get up to.

When he settles back down, he's unable to look in your eyes but you don't make him knowing how shy he must feel right now.

"So uhm...you can start dry if you want, if you want to feel and get used to touching, just don't try and push in."

"You're okay with that?" He nods and takes the lube to fiddle with the bottle and free your right hand. You wait a second, just in case, before moving your hand around his body to curiously trail your fingers over his smooth ass, humming in approval at the lack of hair at all. "Smooth."

"Yeah I uhm, I shave," he admits.

"Must be awkward."

"A little." He sucks on his lip when your fingertip finds his rim and traces over it gently in an almost featherlight touch. "S'weird, right? Girls find it weird usually. For guys to be shaved."

"I don't like body hair on anyone regardless of gender. Wouldn't bother me much if you did have it, just that being hair-free is my preference."

"Does that mean you shave too?" He pointedly glances at your crotch.

"Wax, lasts longer."

"Oh." He swallows when your left hand leaves his thigh to pluck the bottle from his hands, giving him nothing to fiddle with. "I-I thought about trying but uh...seems hard to do alone."

"Yeah, kind of is," you admit, laughing softly and focusing on Yoongi's reactions to the sound of a cap opening and lube squirting out.

He lifts his right hand absently to chew on the skin beside his thumb; an anxiety fuelled habit he's working hard to quit.

"Hey." You lean forward to nudge the top of his head with your nose. He lifts it just enough to peer at you. "We can stop, seriously," you offer, tone genuine and soft.

He shakes his head and quickly lowers his hand to grasp your shirt as if he has only just realised what he's doing to his poor fingers. "I want to. Just nervous."

"What usually helps you relax with a partner?"

"Kissing."

"Do you want to kiss?" He blinks a few times before finding his eyes on your lips almost like he has never seen them before. "I'm more than happy to kiss you if it helps, baby."

"O-okay," He nods.

"No, not okay. Don't just agree with me, this won't work if you're not 100%, Yoongi."

"I am." He nods, firmer and more confidently. "I want to. Wanna kiss you."

"Alright," you agree with a short nod of your own. The syllables almost get sucked back into your throat when Yoongi suddenly surges forward to connect your mouths.

You wait for a few minutes until Yoongi is entirely absorbed in kissing before you press slick fingers against his rim. He jolts, and his mouth falters for a second before moving again; slower than before as if he's too busy focusing on what's about to happen compared to what he's doing. You don't blame him.

At first, you just circle his hole curiously until he squirms a little impatiently, and only then do you edge the tip of your index finger inside. Yoongi inhales sharply but doesn't jump or pull away. You wriggle your finger a little before pushing in further.

"You gotta let me know if I hurt you," you warn once your finger is in as far as possible. Yoongi nods in agreement and reconnects your lips by grabbing your face and pulling it back to his. You chuckle with amusement against his lips, though are more than happy to follow his wishes.

You start a gentle, curious rhythm of softly prodding around inside, punctuated with sliding your finger out then back in.

"M-more," he breathes out in no time at all, so you comply, pulling your finger out to return with another beside it. Yoongi lets out a soft moan at the barely there stretch, just a little more pressure at your knuckles that makes him sigh happily.

"It's okay?" You wonder.

"Y-yeah, can go a little faster if you want."

"Okay, baby," you agree, doing as asked knowing it's more of a request than a suggestion. He's too shy to ask for what he wants so you're going to have to read between the lines and you've already mentally prepared yourself for that.

You watch his reactions to your ministrations, his closed eyes and parted lips, as his hips take barely noticeable movements; which you follow to do the best you can for him.

Up until this point, you have entirely avoided his prostate. Yoongi assumes it's because you don't know where it is, that you are getting used to everything else first before trying to search for it. But you know where it is and haven't wanted to touch it yet. You want Yoongi to genuinely get used to your touch and enjoy it without his prostate being brought in.

When you pull your hand out and away entirely, his eyes open and he frowns at you with a little whine of complaint. "Why'd you stop? Are you finished?"

"No," you laugh and shuffle you both a little so that you can slide your arm in the gap between your spread thighs to reach underneath him and slide your fingers back inside. "This angle is better." You smirk and crook your fingers forward to press directly on his prostate. Yoongi's eyes roll back and he moans loudly. "Right?"

"F-fuck, I-I thought you didn't know..."

"What, where the prostate is?" You laugh as he wriggles on your hands at the attack of your fingertips relentlessly rubbing the sensitive patch. "I know exactly where it is, I've just never put it to use before."

"You su-sure?" His fingers knot in your hair when you wrap your free arm tight around his waist to hold him still, preventing his movements. "Shit, fuck."

"You like being held still?"

"Fuck off."

"Oh, really?" Suddenly, you stop your attack and pull out to lean back against the backrest with your elbows resting on the back. You lean your head on your left palm, the clean one, as the lube-slicked hand hangs limply.

"Wh-what?" Yoongi's eyes are wide with betrayal and desperation. "N-no, no, don't stop. Put your fingers back in my ass, come on," he whines, tugging at your arm, but you hold it firmly in place making him whine and bounce a little with frustration. "Please?"

"Good boy." Your right hand hovers between your bodies. "More lube."

He nods and obediently squirts out a fair amount of lube onto your waiting fingers. "Three now?"

"You want three?" You hum questioningly, sliding your arm back underneath to rub three fingers against his rim. He nods enthusiastically and tries to tilt his hips in a way to make them slide inside, yet you always move away with a grin.

"You're so mean."

"I am." He pouts cutely, making you giggle. "Okay, baby, I'll play nice." And you do; you slide two fingers back inside to stretch him out a bit more, then add the third. "That okay?" You ask, moving carefully to allow him time to get used to it.

"Y-yeah, s'good."

"Yeah?" He nods and circles his hips down against your hand. "Can you cum untouched?"

Yoongi falls still and opens his eyes to look at you; he honestly hadn't even realised that his eyes closed in the first place. "I've never tried," he admits.

"Can we try? I think it'd be really hot."

"Oh uh, okay," he agrees, cheeks flushing a little darker than the pleasure and slight exertion already has them.

"You can change your mind at any time, okay?"

"I know," he agrees, giving you a shy smile before leaning forward to return his lips to yours, so you straighten up and move your left arm from the back of the couch to wrap back around him.

You let him get used to the rhythm of your slow, deep kiss, which you've matched the movements of your fingers and he his hips to, before without warning, you push in harder and faster. Yoongi hiccups on a breath, which he doesn't have time to regulate before you pull out and repeat the action causing your hand to slap against his ass a little.

What follows is a string of whines and groans and swears from Yoongi's open mouth, head tipped back and hips bouncing. "So good, you're so good," he pants out, on the verge of mindlessness.

"I can be better," you promise. Yoongi's hole clenches at the thought, making you groan a little. "You're so fucking hot, Yoongi."

Yoongi gasps and bounces harder feeling his climax nearing. Your fingers curl and rub against his prostate with every thrust and his movements grow more desperate. Your left arm returns around his waist to hold him still and force him to just take it, which causes an almost sob to break from his throat.

"G-gonna cum," he announces, instinctively moving his hand between your bodies, but you remove your arm from around his waist to slap his hand away from where he almost has his cock in hand.

"Don't touch."

"Can't help it. Need it," he all but sobs while looking at you with wet, hooded eyes.

"No, you don't."

"But-" He reaches out again, and you huff in frustration before pulling your fingers out of his ass. "No! No! No! M'sorry! I'll be good!" He begs. "Don't stop, please."

"I won't, baby, it's okay, I'm going to make you cum," you assure soothingly and press a kiss to his lips while wiping the tears trickling down his ruddy cheeks. "But you're unable to not touch yourself so we need to move."

"M-move?" He sniffles.

"On your back." He nods and scrambles off of your lap to lay on his back on the couch. He kicks off his boxers and spreads his legs ready for you. You admire him for a moment, and only move when he wriggles self-consciously. "Sorry. You're so beautiful, you know that?"

"M'not," he huffs, looking away as you turn to settle between his thighs on your knees and lay his thighs over your own.

"You are, don't argue with me."

He pouts but doesn't argue further, which you find very interesting. He has essentially submitted to you and all it took was having his prostate touched.

For a moment, you stop to wonder if he's always that quick to submit or if it's because he trusts you and hasn't been touched by a hand except his own in so long.

After roaming your eyes over his pliant body under you, you decide that it's a thought for later though and wriggle a pillow behind his head to prop him up just a little into a more comfortable position against the armrest.

"Hands above your head, baby." He listens and lifts both arms to lay the backs of his hands against the armrest. When you lean over and cover his wrists with your left hand to pin them down, his eyes blow wide and a shiver runs through his body. "Oh, that is a very interesting reaction, sweetheart, we'll have to talk about it later but now." You slide your fingers back into him, loving the way his eyes immediately roll back and his back arches slightly as your fingertips drag over his prostate.

In this position, you can't stop Yoongi's hips jerking and doing their best to fuck himself back on your fingers that force consistent full moans from his open mouth that sound like they come from the bottom of his chest.

It's clear when Yoongi's teetering on the edge of his climax as his tone grows higher and his movements more desperate while his arms fight to be freed so that he can touch himself.

"Come on, baby, you can do it. Let me see how messy you can get without your cock being touched, huh? Gonna let me see what good boys can do, hm?" You encourage with your eyes darting all over him; stuck between watching his face, and the outline of his cock hidden underneath his t-shirt due to the fact neither of you had thought to move it. You really wish you had pushed it up because the thought of seeing Yoongi cum all over himself probably does a little too much for you to be able to admit.

"M'a good boy," he parrots mindlessly.

"Prove it. Cum for me."

He whines and his legs pull up towards his torso as his body curls in a little before a loud, long moan tears from his throat while his legs push out and his back arches, pushing his chest towards you with the force of his orgasm surging through his body. You remove the pressure on his prostate and slow your movements down enough to not overstimulate or hurt, yet still ride him through the pleasure with the slow drag.

When he slumps against the seat, chest shuddering with his heavy breaths, you gently remove your fingers making him shudder a little and whimper.

"It's okay, baby, you did so good for me. Such a good boy, thank you." You release his wrists, yet he makes no attempt to move, too tired from the most intense orgasm he has ever experienced. "I'm going to get some tissues from your desk, okay? I'll be right back." Yoongi frowns and pouts at the thought of being left, yet does nothing else, doesn't even open his eyes until you're back and gently wiping the lube from his ass. "Hey." You smile up at him when you notice he's more with it again, or at least enough to open his eyes. He pouts further. "What?"

"Kisses."

"Oh." You giggle and obligingly lean over him to press your lips to his.

The kiss is much slower and looser than any before; a clear reflection of how sated and lazy Yoongi feels, yet he still wants to kiss and softly lick into your mouth.

When you feel his movements get even slower, almost as if he's falling asleep while making out, you pull back. Yoongi whines and tries to chase your lips but he's back to not even bothering to open his eyes.

"Let me clean you up and then if you're still awake, we can kiss more, okay?" You reason.

"Hm, fine," He slurs sulkily, though stays almost motionless on the seat with hands still above his head as his face turns towards the back of the couch.

"Are you okay with me lifting your t-shirt?" He hums and nods a little, and you know that's the most you'll get from him, so you gently lift the t-shirt out of the drying mess to hold up and away. You don't even take a second to take in the mess on his skin or his flaccid dick, just quickly and carefully wipe him up as best as you can before tossing out the tissues and returning the bottle of lube to what you hope is the correct desk drawer.

You return to the couch with Yoongi's hoodie and are about to ask him to sit up to change out of the dirty top yet find him snoring softly already. Instead, you shuffle his boxers back up onto his body and settle them snugly against his hips before gently and painstakingly removing the soiled t-shirt.

You just about manage to get the hoody on his uncooperative body as he whines and tries to curl back against the cushions every time you almost accidentally rouse him out of his sleep.

Once you're done with your task, you admire his relaxed, sleeping features for a moment too long, and then settle up to his desk to watch some videos while he sleeps.

During a break in between episodes, you hear shuffling, so you remove the headphones and turn to find Yoongi shuffling to sit up while rubbing at his eyes. "Sleep well?" You ask softly.

He nods, and yawns for good measure, before stretching and then finally looking at you. "How long was I sleeping?"

"Couple hours."

"What?!" He baulks. "Why didn't you wake me?"

"Didn't have the heart to, you were pretty fucking exhausted,"

"Oh, uhm…" He looks down at himself as the actions previous to his nap return to his mind. "So that happened...did you change me?" He tugs on his hoodie confused.

"Hm yeah, didn't think you'd appreciate waking up with a cum covered t-shirt."

"No yeah, right...thanks." He turns to sit properly and places his feet on the floor. "So uhm, are you sure you've never done that before?"

"Positive."

"But that was better than tops I've been with."

"Oh, really?" You beam proudly and he hums in confirmation with a nod. "Ah, well maybe it's because their intention isn't to make you feel good but to just get you ready so that they can stick their dicks in you," you suggest.

"Maybe." He shrugs and gets to his feet with a slight wince. "If this is how I feel with just your fingers, you'd destroy me with a dick," he comments while grabbing his jeans from the floor to wobble into.

You get up to help steady him so that he doesn't fall on his ass. "Would you let me?"

"What?"

"Fuck you, if I bought a strap-on?"

"Oh." He nods shyly.

"Words, baby, come on, you know the rules."

"Shut up." He huffs and bats you away while you snigger. You close down what you had been doing on the computer and return to the couch to flop down in a slouch. "Do you know where to buy one? A strap?" Yoongi glances at you as he buttons his jeans.

"Yep, the place I get my usual stuff from sells some interesting ones."

"I'm honestly concerned about what you mean by interesting."

"Look yourself." You get back up to sit at the desk and open up the adult toy store's website. "Sit." You pat your thighs invitingly. Yoongi only hesitates a moment before sitting on your lap so that you can look at the screen together.

"There is no way you're fucking me with that," he deadpans when you point out an honestly obnoxiously huge dildo with ridges.

"Oh, so I can fuck you then?"

"With a normal one, yes," he agrees, and moves your hand from the mouse to scroll himself. "Here look, normal." He points to a very basic-looking realistic dildo.

"Boo, boring. At least try a tentacle." He glares at you, making you laugh. "Joking. How big do you like?"

"Uhm just average is good."

"Bullshit, you scream size queen to me." Yoongi sputters but doesn't argue. "Find one that looks the best to you."

"This is embarrassing," he whines.

"No, it's not. Be a good boy and pick a cock to be fucked with, Yoongi," you hum against his neck, earning a shiver. Yoongi doesn't hesitate to begin intently looking at all the options. "Hm, good boy." You press an approving kiss against his skin and wrap your arms around his waist to squeeze a little. He jolts in surprise, but then shuffles a little to settle in your hold.

After a little while of careful consideration, Yoongi shyly points out the one he likes the best and wants to try with you.

"Okay, add it to the basket." So, he does. "And now find a smaller one."

"What?" He looks over his shoulder at you with a confused frown. "Why?"

"Because I've never done this before so I don't want to go in with that one first and hurt you. Start small and build up to it."

"Oh, okay, that's smart." He agrees and returns his attention to the computer. He doesn't take as long to find a smaller dildo and add it to the basket. "Need a harness now," he murmurs, clicking through to find the right section. "What kind do you want? There's underwear style ones with a connection on the front or ones that are essentially harnesses."

"I don't know. Maybe get one of each style to try?"

"Okay. What size?"

"I don't know, depends on their size guide. I haven't bought lingerie from this site so I don't know what their sizing is like."

"Lingerie?" Yoongi looks at you with interest. "You have lingerie?"

"Yeah."

"Oh...will you wear some for me?"

"You want me to?" He nods. "Okay. We can look on here too and see if there's anything in particular you'd like to see."

"Why didn't we do this earlier?" Yoongi groans, then leans over to kiss you for a moment. "You're the best."

"I know," you giggle and pat his thighs. "Find the size guide."

A few days later, Yoongi finds himself seated at the head of your bed with his back against the headrest watching you unpack the box in front of him.

The order had arrived that morning. You had excitedly texted Yoongi the moment it did, and he had immediately cleared his evening plans.

As soon as his work day ended, Yoongi rushed home to drop off his stuff and shower thoroughly ready, then quickly made his way to your apartment.

So here he is, both nerves and excitement running through his body knowing that soon, you will be fucking him.

As each item is placed on the bed, Yoongi fidgets more and more. Just seeing the picture of the dildo on the side of the box has his dick plumping up.

He doesn't know it, he’s too busy staring down at all the new items, but you notice his fidgeting and reactions; the pink of his cheeks and the increased frequency of his tongue darting out to wet his lips. Even though you've only had one session of sexual activity together, you're pretty confident that you've correctly read his body language as rapidly growing arousal.

For a few moments longer, you continue to unpack the large box but pay no attention to it and only watch Yoongi's intent, wide gaze on the items. His obvious arousal is making your own heat up under your skin.

Suddenly, you quickly repack almost everything making Yoongi jerk with concern and make a questioning noise.

"We can look at it after I've fucked you," you declare when Yoongi's confused eyes find your own darkening ones.

Yoongi swallows thickly and nods dumbly in agreement.

"Do you want me to put anything on?" You ask, motioning to the lingerie that you have left out. Yoongi looks at it, mouth open and genuinely considers it, whether he wants to see the lingerie or get fucked more. "If it helps, I'm wearing a set I already had under this." You point to your outfit of a zipped-up hoodie and basketball shorts. Yoongi swallows again and nods slowly. "What?"

"I wanna see that."

"Okay." You giggle and toss the lingerie from the mattress into the box before picking the whole thing up and moving it to the floor out of the way. "I want to try the harness one today, it matches what I'm wearing." You grin excitedly while picking up the box containing the wet-look-style strappy harness.

"Matches?" Yoongi mutters. You hum in confirmation. "Fuck."

You peer up at him through your eyelashes and giggle, before pressing one knee onto the mattress and leaning closer to him.

"You're going to ruin me, aren't you?" He realises in a mumble.

"I'm certainly going to try," you reply, a little breathless at the thought. You place your empty hand on his thigh to squeeze a little making his breath hitch and legs jolt, before you lift your hand only to slap his inner thigh gently and dart forward to place a disproportionately sweet peck on his lips. "I want you as naked as you're comfortable with by the time I get back from the bathroom."

"O-Okay," he agrees easily. You grin, then lower for a more thorough kiss; one that lingers even when you're out of the room, taking the harness and smaller dildo with you to clean thoroughly. "Fuck," Yoongi exhales and takes a second to gather his wits before getting up to quickly remove all of his clothing except for his boxers; a brand new set of tiny black shorts that do nothing to hide that his dick is hard and trying to escape from the waistband.

Yoongi feels very vulnerable and exposed as he sits there on the bed in nervous wait. He crosses and uncrosses his arms over his chest self-consciously a few times before reaching out to pick up the rather large bottle of anal lube left on the bed.

It's while he's reading the bottle to give himself something to do after removing the packaging so that it can actually be used, that you return sans shorts and with the unpackaged dildo in your hand.

You pause at the doorway and stare at him causing him to put the bottle down so that he can fold his arms over his bare chest again. "Shit, sorry, sorry, fuck, I didn't mean to make you feel self-conscious," you apologise while rushing over. You carefully place the dildo upright on the side table beside the lube bottle before climbing up onto the bed and gently laying your hands over his arms. "You're just so beautiful, Yoongi, my brain short-circuited seeing you waiting for me on my bed like this. Like holy fucking shit, what kind of saint did I save in a past life to get Min fucking Yoongi waiting on my bed?"

"You don't need to be so dramatic," he huffs, though his cheeks are hot with his blush and he allows you to tug his arms to his sides.

"I'm not." He gives you a disbelieving expression. "I'm not! I swear! I'd never tell you empty words, Yoongi, you mean too much to me for me to ever even consider betraying your trust like that."

Your words are so genuine that Yoongi can't help but believe them and accept the truth, making his body warm further understanding that you genuinely think of him in such a way.

"Good," he decides with a shy little nod. "Did you get the harness on okay?"

You hum and nod, leaning up onto your knees in front of him and lifting your hands to the zipper of your jumper. "Wanna see?"

"Of course, I wanna-" He cuts off with a choke when you abruptly open the zipper revealing a glimpse of a crisscross of straps across the revealed skin of your torso. He doesn't even have it in him to curse under his breath when you remove the jumper to toss aside carelessly.

If all of his blood hadn't rushed south and left no brain power behind, Yoongi would see that you definitely aren't as confident as you have been acting; your hands twitch at your sides and your teeth gently clamp on your bottom lip.

But Yoongi is too hypnotised by your body wrapped in intricate lengths of black, wet-look material that make you look like the present of his wet dreams.

"So?" You ask what feels to you like at least ten minutes later when Yoongi still hasn't done anything but stare jaw dropped at you.

To your relief, your sudden voice snaps Yoongi back to reality and makes him drag his lust-darkened eyes up to yours.

Without a word, he gets up until he's on his knees mirroring you, before taking your face into his hands to kiss heavily. The little noise you can't prevent from escaping your mouth makes Yoongi groan deeply and lower one hand so that he can wrap his arm around your waist and pull you closer while he moves too until you're pressed together.

Feeling the smooth latex under his hand has Yoongi's dick twitching back to life where it's pressed between your bodies. It makes you giggle upon feeling it, before pressing your body forward just enough to make Yoongi groan at the pressure.

"I assume that's a good reaction?" You hum breathlessly when the kiss breaks, and you motion to yourself to show that you mean his reaction to how you look.

"You have no idea how sexy you are to me," Yoongi replies a little dumbly, making you giggle through your blush. "I'm really fucking glad you got this harness and ignored my hesitation on the wet look. I never knew I was into it until now."

"I have a wet-look dress," you inform. "And I'm going to wear it when we next all go out, just to wind you up."

"Please don't make me get hard in public, I'm an idol," he whines. "I can't be caught with a boner."

"Guess you better learn to control your dick then." You grin and nudge him back. "Lay down, I really wanna get my hands on your ass as soon as possible; I've been thinking about this non-stop for four days."

"You have?" Yoongi replies while doing as told and moving backwards until he's laid down in the centre of the bed with his head on the pillows. You hum in confirmation while taking the chance to rake your eyes over his body hungrily.

It makes Yoongi's body warm to see how much you like his body, even though he doesn't think it is anything special at all. "M-me too," He admits, causing you to look up at his face and smile softly at him. He smiles back shyly, before bravely reaching down to hook his thumbs into the waistband of his boxers.

Your eyes at once snap down to watch as he slowly pushes his underwear down until he has to lift his hips up to slide them over his ass and to his thighs, where you take over and carefully remove the cloth entirely from his body to drop to the floor beside the bed.

And then you look at him to take him in in his fully nude state. Your cheeks visibly warm and your mouth drops open just enough for your tongue to poke out and prod your bottom lip. "Can I suck your dick?" You ask bluntly, licking your lips again.

"Really?" You nod and shuffle closer until Yoongi has to spread his legs to allow you to kneel between them with your hands on his smooth thighs. "Y-yeah," he agrees, nodding quickly even if you're entirely enraptured by his erection so don't see his action.

Without hesitation, you lower down onto your left elbow and wrap one hand loosely around his erection just to hold it up and allow you to slide it into your mouth enthusiastically. Yoongi's hips instinctively kick up at the sudden, wet warmth and he curses, reaching out to slide his fingers into your hair. You make a happy sound around his length and wiggle your hips as you work him in your mouth, which draws Yoongi's attention to your ass where it's stuck up in the air and showing off your curves in the straps.

"Jesus, fuck," he grunts. "Fucking-fuck-look at you," he breathes out, eyes dragging over your body and down to where your lips are wrapped around his dick, eyes up on him. He swears again. "You need to stop or I'm going to cum," he warns.

You heed his warning and pull off with a soft laugh. "I was there for like ten seconds," you point out amusedly.

He shrugs and looks away embarrassed, only to look back with a gasp when you attach your mouth to his inner thigh to suck a bruise into. "Shit," he chokes, legs shaking a little.

Suddenly overcome with desperation, he reaches out to grab the lube and shove it against your shoulder.

"Hm, okay, baby," you agree while sitting up on your knees again so that you can take the bottle and pump some of the contents onto your fingers. "Do you want it like this or a different position?" You ask, putting the bottle aside on the mattress for when you need it again.

"This," he answers, grabbing a spare pillow to wiggle under his hips. "Wanna see you."

"Okay." Your smile is happy and you lean down over him to press your lips to his.

Yoongi lifts both hands to gently hold your face as you kiss slowly and deeply.

His breath hitches as your wet fingers touch his rim, though he doesn't stop kissing you. A little whimper leaves his throat as one finger slowly edges in. You make a curious sound at the much less resistance compared to the last time you had your fingers inside of Yoongi yet say nothing and add a second.

"Did you already finger yourself?" You ask, unable to stop yourself when you can already add a third.

"Y-yeah," he confirms. "Is that okay? Are you upset?"

"I mean, usually I would definitely like to prep you myself; your ass is the eighth wonder of the world-" He rolls his eyes, making you laugh. "But I honestly think it's best to not get me that turned on today so that I can have at least some self-control when fucking you for the first time."

"Fingering me turns you on?" You nod. "Oh, I didn't realise, you seemed normal last time."

"I wanted to focus on you too much to pay attention to it. But after, jeez, I had to watch a very dry show to calm myself back down," you snigger with amusement at the memory.

"M'sorry."

You frown confusedly down at him and remove your fingers from his ass. He's about to complain but notices you're reaching for the dildo so instead presses his lips together.

"For what?" You wonder.

"What?"

"You apologised. Why?"

"I fell asleep."

"Yeah?" Your head tilts down as you look at the harness so that you can attach the dildo properly.

"I didn't get you off." You laugh a little. "What?" He frowns. "Why's that funny?"

"All I wanted was to finger you, I didn't want you to do anything but cum yourself and you definitely did that so I was more than happy with your involvement, Yoon, there was nothing else I wanted from that experience."

"So, you didn't want to cum?" He looks at you disbelievingly until you lift your head having successfully attached the toy after a little fiddling.

"It wasn't the plan, no."

"But did you want to?"

"I mean, I haven't been that turned on in a long time, well until now. But if I wanted to cum, I could've gone and taken care of it while you were asleep. Just because I made you cum, it doesn't mean you owe me one, that's not how this works, Yoon."

"I know," he mumbles, running his hands down your body to finger the harness until he locates the dildo and can wrap his hand around it and tug, forcing you to get closer between his spread-wide thighs. "But I want to. Wanna make you feel good."

"You do, trust me, you do," you assure, before pressing a sweet, short kiss to his lips. "Can I fuck you now?"

"Definitely." He nods, eyes wide with anticipation.

With excitement in your eyes, you reach down to knock Yoongi's hand from the dildo so that you can apply more than enough lube. Yoongi is staring at you questioningly when you look back up at him.

"What? I like it messy," you giggle shyly, and look back down so that you can watch as you guide the toy to Yoongi's awaiting hole.

"You do?" You nod. "Me too." You grin brightly up at him, happy at the shared interest, before slowly pushing your hips forward. Yoongi's eyes widen a little and his lips part as he's breached by the toy.

"Okay?" You worry.

"Yeah, keep going," he confirms, looping his fingers into the straps over your hips to pull you towards him at a speed quicker than you would've moved yourself, but if anyone knows Yoongi's limits, it's Yoongi himself, so you let him.

In no time at all, your hips are pressed flush to him and he's breathing a little heavier at being full.

"Fuck me, come on, fuck me," he breathes out encouragingly, removing his fingers from the straps to give you control back and instead press his palms to your waist.

"Okay, baby," you hum and press a kiss to his chest, before leaning up onto your haunches and use your hands to press Yoongi's thighs open further.

Yoongi swallows thickly and knows he will never come back from this the same and you haven't even moved yet. And then you do, slowly dragging back before shoving forward and knocking a moan from Yoongi that he wasn't aware he could produce. You smirk at him before tightening your hold and repeating the action.

"F-fuck," he stammers, gripping the bedding beneath him in an attempt to ground himself. You've only thrust twice and he's already leaking on his stomach.

"Okay?" He nods madly. "Hm, let's get that better." The look on your face is a little dark and very determined, and Yoongi keens before you've even pulled back out.

This time, you adjust your position a little to get yourself better leverage to essentially pull back, and then pound into Yoongi while simultaneously rolling your hips and causing Yoongi's back to arch and his eyes to roll back. He's not going to last at all.

It's not even a minute of the unbelievably good fucking later that Yoongi wraps a shaking hand around his cock to tug at it desperately for only a few seconds before his body pulls tight and he comes all over his torso.

You watch the whole ordeal with hooded eyes and an open mouth as you pant from exertion and arousal. Not knowing if Yoongi gets overstimulated quickly and not wanting to hurt him, you quickly slow your movements and stop when his hand falls from his cock.

While Yoongi lays there breathing heavily with his chest heaving and eyes closed, you pull out and remove the dripping toy from the harness.

Without a word, you get up and move to the bathroom to rinse off the toy and leave it on the counter to wash properly later, and then you grab a washcloth to dampen it and return to Yoongi. He blinks his eyes open when you clamber back onto the bed and start to clean him up.

By the time you've finished cleaning his chest and ass up, Yoongi's breathing is back to normal and he's watching you, looking more satisfied than you've ever seen him.

"Hey." You smile as you settle beside him, washcloth on the side table behind you. He purses his lips at you, so you lean forward to kiss him slowly. When you pull back, you remain on your side propped up with your head on your left hand. "How you feeling? I didn't go too hard, did I?"

"I'm pretty sure how quick I came answers that," he huffs, pouting at the ceiling. "Swear I'm not usually that quick."

"It was hot, I don't mind the time frame," you reply honestly, and lean down to kiss his shoulder. "I knew you'd look good coming on yourself," you hum against his skin. "Wish I had photographic memory so I never forget a moment of that sight."

"Shut up."

"I'm being serious!" You lift up and pout at him. "I'm sad that I won't forever remember it that well."

"Well...it's not like that's the only chance you'll get to see it." He shrugs, turning onto his right side to face you, so you lower to lay down too. "I can't get over how good you are at these sexual things you've never done before."

"I'm naturally gifted."

Yoongi chuckles and nods. "Yeah, you are. I'm both scared and excited to see how much better you'll get with practice. You're going to own my ass in no time, I won't be able to fuck anyone else because they won't be as good as you. Fucking Pavlov me."

"Don't think that's the right term but I'll take it." He doesn't respond and instead shuffles closer to kiss you.

Yoongi's left hand travels down to hold onto one of the strips of material over your ribs. "How hard is this to get off?"

"A lot." He groans. "Why?"

"Wanna eat you out." Your eyes blow wide in shock. "I can't tell what that look means."

"No one's said that to me before," you admit softly.

"What?" Yoongi's frown is beyond offended. "How could no one say that to you?" He huffs and leans up while nudging you onto your back. You go willingly with a shrug. "Well, I really want to. Can I?" You nod and reach down to unclasp the buckles of the harness. Yoongi shuffles down the bed so that he can pull it off your legs once you've opened it. "How do we-" he cuts off when he looks up and realises that the straps of the lingerie have been designed to leave your crotch entirely bare. "Fuck."

Immediately, Yoongi lowers down onto his stomach between your thighs and presses them wider to stare at where you're glistening with arousal.

"How is all of you so fucking perfect?" Even though it's a question, he's really talking to himself, his voice low and thick with arousal.

Yet even if he is talking to you and expects a response, you wouldn't be able to form one, your voice is stuck in your throat with nerves.

"Tell me if I do something you don't like, okay?" He speaks, leaning up enough to make eye contact with you. You just nod, cheeks flushed pink and your bottom lip sucked nervously between your teeth. Yoongi shoots you a gentle smile, then lowers to press a soft kiss to your hip.

You watch intently as Yoongi trails soft kisses across your skin and over the shiny fabric digging slightly into your thigh due to your legs being spread by Yoongi's hands. He stops at your inner thigh in between two straps, seemingly entranced by the little bulge caused by the material.

As if he doesn't have any control, Yoongi opens his mouth a little wider and clamps down making you gasp. The noise brings him back to reality and he almost pulls off but as he's releasing his jaw, your gasp fully registers and he realises that it wasn't a bad gasp at all.

Instead of continuing to open his jaw, he closes it further and fights down his own groan feeling his teeth press into the giving flesh before he sucks a little harsher than he normally starts off, yet you whimper and your left hand flutters atop his head in a way that feels as if you want to grasp but aren't brave enough. So, Yoongi sucks harder, borderline painfully, and is rewarded with fingers in his hair and grasping securely, encouragingly.

Yoongi suckles the spot for a moment longer before pulling off with a pop.

You both eye the bright red mark and admire the indents left by his teeth before Yoongi suddenly darts down again.

You had expected him to attach to the mirrored spot on your other thigh but he shocks you by suctioning to the soft, smooth flesh over your pubic bone, so close to your clit that it makes it tingle.

You're so caught off guard that the moan of pleasure escapes your mouth before you can stop it. You loosen your right hand from the sheets with every intention of lifting it to cover your mouth in embarrassment; it was too loud of a noise for such a small act in your mind.

It seems that Yoongi knows you too well though, despite never having done anything like this together before, as his left hand quickly darts up and grabs your wrist causing you to fall still.

You blink down at him and find his dark eyes on you warningly. Your arm twitches upwards and his grip tightens even as his mouth neither moves to detach or do anything more.

Yoongi's eyes square a little; a silent command, and although you don't really listen to anyone usually regardless of circumstance, you nod obediently and relax your arm. Yoongi's gaze relaxes and he directs your hand to your own thigh just so that he can link your fingers together while also allowing him to still keep pressure on your thighs to have them remain open for him.

Really, Yoongi would've loved to take advantage of the fact that you're the first person to seem to like the rougher biting his gums always ache for, but he was determined to give you the best head you'll ever have before his oral fixation kicked in, and now he's reminded of that upon seeing the way you actually submitted to him, even a little.

He decides that you definitely deserve a reward for that alone.

Only a little reluctantly, Yoongi slowly releases his suction and pulls back just enough to allow the sight of the forming bruise to shoot a lick of arousal into his stomach, before he lowers even further to softly trail his tongue up your folds, carefully avoiding your hole and clit not wanting to jump in too fast for you on your first time receiving oral.

A fact that honestly makes him kind of angry; how could no one have offered to go down on you? It's vile and selfish in his mind, and he wants to give you the best experience he possibly can.

You don't make any noise in response, so he doesn't know if you like it, but at the very least, you don't try to remove either of you from the situation, so you're willing to let him continue.

For a few minutes, Yoongi keeps his actions relatively soft everywhere he touches, yet he still doesn't gain much of a response from you. You're breathing a little heavier and he can see that your eyes are closed; you do look like you're enjoying yourself but you're quiet.

If he hadn't heard a moan moments before, he would assume that you're just quiet in general during sex, but he had and he wants more. You sounded so good that he honestly wants to record you to replay back when he's alone with a hand in his pants. Maybe you're just not that into oral.

Not wanting to be a letdown, Yoongi carefully tugs his hand free from your grasp and presses your own palm to your thigh. When he sees your fingers curve a little to hold your thigh, he smiles to himself and presses a finger to your hole lightly; a warning of what's to come. You don't pull away, so he slowly presses in, watching entranced as you swallow him up with no issue.

Feeling you ready to take another, he pulls out and adds another finger alongside the first and watches all the same as soft, wet heat envelops them both happily. Although there isn't much resistance per se due to how wet you are, there's definitely more pressure on his fingers, especially around his second knuckle. He looks up to watch your reaction as he pushes in, in case any sign of discomfort appears.

Your eyebrows furrow the tiniest amount, and your mouth drops open a little wider as a stuttered breath leaves. Your hips push down slightly, shyly almost, and all worry leaves Yoongi. You like it and want more.

So, he gives it to you, pushing his fingers in completely, only slightly faster than his original pace but you immediately react and suck in a breath.

Suddenly, it hits Yoongi that you had reacted so strongly enough to moan when he was being harsh and rough. You like the borderline pain and firmer actions, not the soft gentle touches he has been trying thinking it will be the best move for your first time.

With this revelation, Yoongi attaches his mouth directly to your clit and sucks while pulling his fingers out just to the second knuckle where they're widest and using that girth to stimulate your opening. Immediately, you gasp and moan breathily, tightening your fingers in his hair enough to make him moan around your clit.

The pace Yoongi takes up fucking his fingers into you is fast and just a level below hard considering he isn't left-handed and the angle isn't the easiest to navigate while he's toying endlessly with your clit with his mouth; teeth included making his own body sing with arousal.

He's definitely hard and leaking between the mattress and his stomach.

Yoongi can't believe how worked up he's getting so quickly. Sure, he always loves giving oral, especially if it means he also had his fingers in a wet, warm hole, but he never gets hard from it after already being fucked so well. But you react so well to his rough actions, and you seem to love the intensity of his oral fixation allowing him to really suction and bite as much as he wants.

Honestly, if he couldn't feel you tightening around his fingers and your hips shaking with the effort of keeping still, Yoongi would be certain that he's much more into the activity than you are. But your approaching orgasm is clear, especially with your frequent little moans growing closer together and higher in pitch. Though he does kind of wish you wouldn't control yourself like that, he kind of really most definitely wants you to fuck his face.

Maybe he'll have to ask you to sit on his face one day, and preferably very soon.

"Yoon," you warn with a gasp, eyes flying open to stare down at him, but his eyes are closed and focused, though he does squeeze your thigh a little to show that he heard and understands. You let your eyes close again and your head tips back as the pleasure teeters right on the edge.

One more run of Yoongi's teeth over your swollen clit sends you tumbling over, cursing as the orgasm shoots through your body quickly.

Usually, it'd be over as quick as that, but Yoongi hasn't stopped his movements; if anything, he seems more eager to lap around his fingers and fuck into you. He even curls his fingers up into that spot he's found but not yet focused on, to now zero in on it and apply an almost torturous amount of pleasure that's borderline painful with the orgasm barely even over.

"Oh, fuck," you whine, curling your fingers tight enough into your thigh that your short, blunt nails dig in sharply.

A second orgasm hits out of nowhere, and you gasp deeply, curving your back at the intensity and lose all control of your hips. Yoongi moans deeply as he's forced face-first into your pussy where he happily attaches his mouth to suck yet another bruise harshly.

As soon as you've mostly come down from the second orgasm to the point that you're mentally back on Earth, you tighten your grip in Yoongi's hair to tug him up while he makes a noise of complaint at being pulled away from eating you out, so that you can kiss him heavily, careless of your taste on his tongue and lower face that's glistening with your own arousal.

That at least stops his complaints and he quickly settles into the kiss, lowering down his top half, yet keeping his hips up so that his naked erection doesn't touch you. You realise what he's doing and hook your legs over his hips to tug him down, making him groan deeply as his erection slips against your slick skin.

"Can't believe you got me hard already," he grunts, lowering his head to kiss down your neck. You turn your head to give him better access. and when he starts to suck, you grind your hips up against him. "Fuck," he pants.

"Want you to fuck me," you admit a little breathlessly.

"Seriously?" You nod and whine a little while grinding harder and feeling his hard length rub firmly over your clit. "Shit, okay, condom?" You shake your head making him sigh. "Then-"

"I'm clean and got my tubes tied," you inform, turning your head to him when he pulls back to look down at you.

"Me too; clean and vasectomy," he mumbles in disbelief. Your eyes light up with excitement that reflects in his. "So, we're both free of transmittable diseases and infertile," he summarises.

"Which means you can fill me up and make a mess."

"Fuck."

With no reason to hesitate, or the will to, Yoongi reaches down to grip his erection and line up with your entrance. Your legs drop to the mattress to spread wide and Yoongi pushes in.

"Ah, fuck," you whimper as he pushes in, your eyes fluttering closed and hands gripping his sides.

"You okay?" You nod rapidly. "Doesn't hurt?"

"Feels good."

"Y-yeah," he agrees, lowering his gaze to watch as his cock fills your pussy and leaves his vision, buried snugly in your warmth. "Fuck, feel so good, baby." Your eyes blink open at the petname to look at him in surprise. "What?"

"Baby?"

He's genuinely puzzled for a second, before he recalls that he just called you that without thought and his cheeks warm with embarrassment. "Sorry, didn't realise."

"I'm not opposed, like at all, fucking love petnames," you admit easily, and lift your arms to wrap around his neck loosely while a mischievous glint appears in your eyes.

Before Yoongi can question what exactly that means, you rock your hips, making him suck in a sudden inhale and shudder at the unexpected friction on his cock.

You burst into laughter at his reaction and flop down onto the mattress. "Did you get possessed?"

"Shut up," he huffs while his cheeks burn with embarrassment. "You surprise attacked me."

"Surprise attacked," you cackle, your hands cupping your own cheeks and fingers pressing into where your cheeks bunch the highest.

Yoongi pouts at you, which only makes you giggle; a different kind of laugh, one more adoring for his cute expression, but it still isn't what he wants and he's feeling petty.

Without warning he pulls back his hips, then slams forward, punching a strangled gasp of pleasure from your mouth as your hands fly up to brace against the wooden poles of the ornate headboard. Yoongi smirks at your wide-eyed and open-mouthed expression, then reaches up to brace himself with one hand against the flat of the headboard while his other slides under your lower back until he can wrap his arm around you enough to hold your body still. And then, he wastes no more time and starts almost brutally fucking you.

It's intense and pleasurable in a way you're not used to; of course, you have been fucked hard before, but it was never like this. Not because people haven't tried but they simply can't pull the pleasure from your very soul like Yoongi seems to be doing.

Even if you want to, you wouldn't be able to stop the stream of pleasured sounds from leaving your open mouth, but you don't even want to; don't feel like hiding as you aren't the only one who seems unable to clamp their own vocals. Yoongi is just as loud as you are and it honestly only turns you on even more.

Usually, both you and Yoongi like to talk to your partners; check in and praise them, talk dirty and tease, yet neither of you has it in you to do it. You couldn't even talk if you try, not past the occasional swear or utter of the other's name or a petname.

Yoongi quickly takes up calling you princess and you have to admit, you really fucking like how it sounds from his lips. Others have tried to use the petname with you before but you could never take it seriously and tended to laugh or to fuck off, depending on the situation. Yet with Yoongi, it sends warmth to your chest that trickles into your stomach and lower to add to the quickly-growing impending orgasm.

Yoongi has no idea how he's keeping up the pace; his chest is heaving and his thighs are burning, and he's certain he's so close to getting a cramp in his left ass cheek somehow, but he can't give any mind to it; it's all on you and how fucking good you feel wrapped around his cock.

You keep sporadically squeezing him and he doesn't know if it's a sign of a nearing orgasm or just how you feel pleasure but either way, it feels beyond fucking words and he both never wants it to end and is chasing his orgasm desperately. He wants to fill you up and then watch his cum spill out from your pussy afterwards.

Fuck, maybe you'll even let him fuck it out of you, perhaps in the shower once he has his strength back after a much-needed nap.

When you remove one hand from the headboard and shove it down between your bodies to play with your clit roughly, Yoongi makes certain to keep his movement the same to not ruin your pleasure.

Watching you touch yourself all but shoves him headfirst over the edge and his hips jerk unintentionally as his orgasm hits, spilling cum into you with a few breathless moans of your name. Your breath hitches in response, before you're squeezing him tight, earning more pleasured curses to fall from his mouth as he feels your orgasm in the rhythmic tightening of your walls pulsating around his cock.

Slowly, you both fall still with closed eyes and heavy breathing as you ride out the aftershocks and last dregs of pleasure.

"Jesus fuck," Yoongi's the first to speak some minutes later when he finally has his head screwed on relatively straight and is only panting a little. You laugh at his comment, but it's definitely an agreeing sound.

Jesus fuck indeed.

"I'm not sure who is gonna Pavlov who here," you muse, reaching out to cup his face in both hands. "C'mere."

Yoongi goes willingly, lowering down and wincing a little as he feels his soft dick slipping out, but neither of you comment on it, you’re both too interested in kissing; happy and sated, and kind of lazy, but it's good.

When the kiss breaks, Yoongi clambers off of you and drops down at your side, sinking on his right side comfortably against the pillow and letting his body relax. "I need a nap," he mutters, earning an amused giggle while you turn onto your left side to face him. "Actually no, fuck a nap, need a coma."

"You're ridiculous."

"If you tell me you still have the energy to fuck, you're insane."

"I mean...give me like ten minutes to get a drink and yeah, I probably could."

"Fucking hell, you're going to kill me," he groans, turning his head into the pillow, but the noise isn't exactly one of argument.

"Good way to go though, right?" You grin, and he looks back at you with a chuckle.

"Definitely." He reaches out with a heavy arm to tug on the straps over your stomach. "C'mere, wanna spoon my princess."

"Are you trying to get fucked?" You comment, making him snort out a tired laugh. Instead of going to him, you roll out of bed making him whine and pout in complaint. "I'll be right back, I really do need a drink."

"Hurry," he mumbles, letting his eyes flutter close.

You hobble to the kitchen as quickly as you can so that you can gulp down as much cool water as possible without making yourself sick and then you refill your glass.

You're about to fill a glass for Yoongi too but considering how tired he is, you know he won't sit up even to drink if his mouth is dry. So, you find a bottle with a straw that you hope won't spill if on its side and fill that with cold water instead.

You return to your bedroom and place your glass down before tucking the bottle by Yoongi and guiding the straw into his open mouth. He's pretty much asleep but the touch wakes him, and although he doesn't know what's going on in his sleep-addled mind, when you tell him to drink and tap the straw on his lip, he wraps his lips around it to do as told and gropes around until he finds the bottle to hold steady without opening his eyes.

You take the chance to struggle your way out of the lingerie on your body and toss it aside to deal with later.

By the time you clamber back onto the bed, Yoongi's fallen asleep again, bottle still held and straw to his lips. You giggle amusedly and remove the item, making him snuffle awake again. Once the bottle is beside your glass, you shuffle down with your back to him and pull his arm over your waist.

Yoongi hums happily and shuffles closer until you're pressed together and his face is in your neck. He inhales deeply and tightens his arm around your waist, tucking his hand up by your chest, and that's when he suddenly realises that he can feel nothing but skin against his own. He jolts up a little onto his right elbow and peers blearily down at you. You watch his expression from over your shoulder; you see the fatigue slip away and his tongue wet his lips as he notices that for the first time, you're completely naked.

"You're naked," he mumbles, tracing his left hand over your waist and hip, watching the trail his touch takes. You just hum in confirmation and allow him to touch all the new skin he can see. "Beautiful," he sighs out, and then lowers back down to curl around your back.

You can feel his dick against your ass and it has definitely plumped up a little in the past moments, and, of course, you just have to tilt your hips back to brush your ass against it.

He nips your shoulder in retaliation, earning a giggle from you. "I'm too fucking tired right now, baby."

"I like cock warming." You pout, grinding back against him. "Don't you wanna be all snug as you sleep?"

"You're fucking ridiculous," he huffs, amusement in his tone, before pressing his hips forward against you. "Go on then, you get me hard, you can warm me as much as you want while we sleep."

"What if I can't sleep?" He makes a curious sound. "I usually can sleep no problem with a cock in me but something about you brings out the deviant in me so...what's your stance on somnophilia?"

"The fuck's that?"

"Sleep sex."

"You want to have sex while we sleep?"

"I'd be awake if I can't sleep, dumbass."

"Shut up, m'tired." He bites your shoulder a little harder this time, but that just makes you curve into him and press your ass harder against his gradually hardening dick. "Fuckin-" He inhales and purposely moves his mouth away from your skin so that he won't give in to temptation again; he's pretty sure if he does bite you again, you'll definitely wind up going for another intense round and he's certain he cannot physically handle that until he wakes up again. He's never been so exhausted from sex alone.

"So?" You prompt when he stays quiet behind you. "I'm personally into it either way."

"Mm, I dunno, just go to sleep for now, baby."

"Okay, Yoonie," you agree and pull your hips away from him, giving his dick space to breathe and soften without your touch. Yoongi hums appreciatively and curls his arm back around your waist, though makes sure to keep his hand away from your chest; he knows that if he feels your breasts he will not be able to get to sleep until he has sufficiently played with them.

When you're almost asleep, Yoongi speaks up in a low rough tone, close to sleep himself. "If you wake up and I'm hard, do what you want."

"Yeah?"

"Mm, just try not to wake me."

"Okay.” You smile to yourself and snuggle in close, smiling a little more at the kiss that gets pressed to your head.

To your absolute joy, when you wake a little under an hour later, you and Yoongi are pressed so close together that his dick has hardened in his sleep.

You grin to yourself, and although you're barely awake, you know what you want. So, you painstakingly move into a better position so that when you reach behind yourself and carefully hold Yoongi's erection, you can guide it into yourself, making you sigh in happiness. You really do like being full.

You peer over your shoulder to make sure you haven't woken Yoongi, then shuffle again, sliding further onto his length until you're pressed tight up against him. You watch Yoongi's face contort and little huffs of breath escape his lips from the pleasure, but he doesn't wake, so you settle back down and are soon back asleep.

You aren't surprised to have a sex dream, though you are surprised by just how vivid it is. You've had similar kinds of dreams before where you're actively seeking pleasure in a lucid-dreaming kind of way, but you usually wake up before achieving your orgasm goal. But this time, you wake up with the force of the dream orgasm that turns out to be real.

"Fuck," Yoongi curses roughly behind you, one hand on your hip as he rocks into you.

"Yoonie?" You mumble sleepily while looking over at him, cheeks warm with the pleasure but eyes barely open.

"Hi princess," he greets with a smile tilting towards a smirk. You whine and push back against him. "You want more?" He asks, his own cheeks slightly pinkened from fucking you as you slept without moving your position to not wake you.

You nod and reach down to move his left hand from your hip and place it on your sternum instead.

"Alright, whatever my princess wants," he agrees, leaning forward to press a kiss to your jaw while moving his hand to cup your left breast. "Didn't know your tits are so big," he comments lowly as he returns to rocking into you slow and deep. "Hide 'em so well."

"H-have to, get looks oth-" Yoongi hits a real good spot with that thrust, making you cut off with a whine as your eyes roll back. "Yoon," you plead.

"Alright, fuck." He shuffles closer and lays his palm flat on the top of your chest to hold you back against him before rabbiting into you while barely pulling out, meaning he keeps hitting that same spot rapidly making you whine and writhe and gasp out his name. "Good girl."

The tingle in his teeth returns as he stares at the mostly faded teeth marks on your shoulder from before sleep. He knows those marks will be soon gone with no evidence, no bruise left behind and that doesn't sit well with him.

Yoongi leans down to attach his mouth harshly over the same spot. You jerk in response, and automatically his hand lifts to restrain you and wrap around your throat. You instantly fall still as your walls squeeze him tight.

Yoongi gasps against your shoulder and removes his hand, but you whine in serious complaint, locking your grasp on his arm. "Are you sure?" He asks as you lead his hand back to your throat. You nod madly. "Words, please, baby, I need verbal confirmation to do this. It's dangerous and-"

"Yes, yes, I want it, choke me, Yoongi, please," you plead, turning your head just enough that your wet gaze meets his and he can see the truth and desperation in your eyes. "Please?"

"Fuck, okay, kick me if it's too much or you need a break or change your mind or-"

"I won't." You sound so certain that Yoongi can only nod and curl his fingers to show that he's more than willing. There's practically no pressure to his touch yet you still gasp and slump against the pillow as your eyes flutter shut.

Yoongi licks his lips and takes a second to compose himself, before he applies a little pressure. Your mouth opens in a silent gasp but otherwise, you're practically boneless on the mattress, entirely trusting your vulnerability to him; submitting to him in a way nobody ever has before.

Yoongi growls a little and doesn't even have it in him to question himself there, before he returns to fucking you; rougher than before with longer strokes, yet still successfully pulling moans from your parted lips.

He waits a little before squeezing harder, hard enough to make breathing hard for you, but you fucking love it, clamping down tight on his cock and making no attempt to free yourself.

Yoongi's cock throbs and as much as he wants to keep going he knows he can't and removes the pressure to allow you to suck in some ragged breaths.

He takes the chance to readjust his position so that he can once again mouth at your skin and work on another mark, slowing his hips enough that he doesn't jostle your body as much. But that makes you whine in complaint.

If you can whine, you have enough breath is Yoongi's thought, and then he's constricting your airflow again and angling his hips to try and find that spot inside you again. When he finds it, you choke so he releases his pressure and focuses on once again battering that spot with short quick thrusts that make you moan endlessly through heaving for breath.

With his hand resting on your throat, your walls dripping and tight as hell around his cock, and his mouth suctioned to the crook of your neck, Yoongi is so fucking close to an orgasm. You're so fucking tight around him, tight like pre-orgasm tight, but he has no idea if you can orgasm without clitoral stimulation. He's vaguely concerned that he will cum while you suffer without your clit being touched, but he himself physically can't and you're too far gone to seem to register that it's something you can actually do.

Too close and desperate to stop, Yoongi decides he can make you cum once he has himself and once again tightens his hold on your throat. To his surprise, your back immediately curves and your pussy spasms around him as wetness suddenly increases, and he's hit with the possible fact that you just squirted with your orgasm.

Yoongi's orgasm hits him like a truck. He doesn't mean to bite down harder and doesn't even register the metallic taste on his tongue until the post-orgasm fuzz leaves his brain. He gasps in shocked horror and leans back, glad that he had moved his hand from your throat and not also choked you out in a non-sexy way in his mindlessness.

The bite mark is pretty vicious looking; bruised deeply from his sucking and ringed by tooth-shaped indents, all of which are bleeding a little. Luckily, none are particularly deep but still, he's horrified; partly by what he's done, and partly at the fact the sight sends arousal flitting teasingly through his body.

"Yoonie?" Your soft voice snaps him back to reality to find you blinking concernedly at him over your shoulder. "It's okay," you assure, reaching your left hand back to lay on his thigh and rub soothingly. "Really, don't look so scared, I'm not mad."

"I fucking bit you!" He squeaks. "You're bleeding!"

"Yes, I see," you muse, gaze dropping to his lips pointedly. He quickly rubs his hand over his mouth roughly to remove the blood. "I'm not new to bleeding during sex."

He opens his mouth to respond, once again planning to berate himself, but then he registers your words and blinks dumbly at you. "What?"

"I have experimented a lot, Yoon and not always with the best people to try potentially dangerous things with."

He sighs your name out worriedly. "Please don't tell me you've let someone hold a knife to your skin during sex. I know you joked about it before but I seriously thought it was just a joke."

"I haven't," you assure before grinning a little awkwardly. "Yet."

"I'm not letting you do knife play with some asshole, don't be ridiculous."

"You're not an asshole."

He blinks at you a few times. "Me?" You hum in confirmation. "You want me to put a knife to your skin?"

"I want to try it and you're the only person I trust like that." You shrug and turn your head back away, both because the angle is hurting your neck, and because you suddenly feel honestly kind of like a freak for even suggesting it. Knife play is no joke and something most people don't even know exists, and even fewer actually think is a good idea. "I'll forget about it, you seem scared enough just biting me hard enough to draw blood, it was stupid to suggest."

"Wait, wait, wait," he huffs, and shuffles backwards to create the space to turn you onto your back so that you can look at one another. "I don't want you to feel bad, that's not a look I see on you, stop it."

"It was stupid to suggest though." You frown. "I'm sorry-"

"No, stop, it-" He takes a breath, and then drops down onto his back beside you as he only then realises how much his right shoulder hurts. He reaches up to rub it, only for you to roll over and bat his hand away so that you can massage it yourself.

Yoongi watches your concentration for a few minutes with a fond smile, before he reaches out to tilt your face to him and leans up to gently kiss you. You hum, surprised but very pleased and kiss him back, leaning forward so that he can lower back onto the pillow and not hurt his neck.

When you pull apart, he keeps his hand on your cheek and strokes his thumb over your skin softly. "I was scared that I hurt you; I didn't mean to and it scared me how easily I could accidentally do serious damage if I'm not careful." You make a noise of understanding. "But I was also scared that I liked it." Your eyebrows lift in genuine surprise. "I saw what I had done and I fucking- I liked it, like it turned me on a little."

"Really?" He nods. Despite the conversation, the way your eyes light up with joy and excitement makes him chuckle fondly. "So would you consider knife play?"

"I... I think I can consider it, yeah," he confirms, earning a bright smile, followed by a very thorough kiss.

You can't say for sure what your future relationship with Yoongi holds, but you're real fucking excited to find out.

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ikeuverse · 1 year ago

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I WANT YOU — p.sunghoon

PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader GENRES: fluff, a pinch of angst WC: 4.5k+

WARNINGS: mentions of drinking, coming home drunk (being carried, literally), a few swear words. and let me know if I've forgotten anything else.

SYNOPSIS: hiding the fact that you were dating your brother's best friend was easy, but it was hard to control the jealousy of comments made when his friends didn't know about your relationship.

NOTES: i don't remember ever seeing a story with sunghoon being the best friend in love, so i wanted to write something like this. i hope you enjoy it as much as i enjoyed writing something for him like this.

masterlist

Friday night was the moment when you felt the peak of your tiredness beating against every fiber of your body. Taking off all the clothes you wore to work during that tiring day, getting into the hot shower was the only thing you needed for a moment.

Water on your skin, strawberry-scented soap and shampoo, and a lot of relaxation as soon as you turn off the shower to dry off and look for more comfortable clothes.

"Y/n?" the voice called out from downstairs in the apartment, indicating that your brother had just arrived home.

Putting on your baggy T-shirt followed by your pajama shorts, you went downstairs to meet him in the living room, turning on the television.

"Oh, did you just get out of the shower?" he asked when he turned to you. A smile played on his lips as you smiled back, without much enthusiasm for being completely tired from your exhausting day.

"Do you want something to eat? I'll order—"

"Actually" he interrupted you, walking with you into the kitchen where he leaned against the worktop, "I just came to drop off my backpack and let you know I'm going out with the boys."

Oh, your whisper came out softly, he was still smiling while his hands were flat on the marble in front of him.

"Be careful, please" you asked him "Don't come loaded tonight, okay? Tomorrow you need to study for your final exams."

His smile was contagious. And you felt the weight of your brother's body as he came up to hug you and put his chin on your head.

"I promise I'll take care of myself, okay?"

He didn't take care of himself.

You laughed at the brief thought earlier in the evening as soon as you hung up the phone. On the call, Jay's loud voice was indicating that your brother had already left about fifteen minutes ago with Sunghoon.

Park Sunghoon. That's why he hadn't come to see you that night, he was with your brother in that bar.

Of course. You couldn't just ask your brother's best friend to stay with you, when in fact your brother was a pit of jealousy. So your relationship with Sunghoon had to be a secret from the day you first kissed.

The party was going on and you would never have thought that Park Sunghoon, the high school skater, would have a crush on you. He kissed you. He kissed you so hard until you lost your breath - or until your brother threw you away in your last year before university.

After that, no one ever saw the two of you together again. Meanwhile, on the sly, the two of you couldn't keep your hands off each other. The only person who knew about you and Sunghoon was Callie, your best friend, and Jay's girlfriend, your friend and your brother's friend.

She was one of the only female figures completely close to you and your circle of friends, so opening up to her about everything that was going on was almost inevitable.

"He went to take your brother who drank too much" Callie muttered on the other end of the line. "I just got home with Jay and I think tomorrow's studies are going to be postponed."

"Really?" you scratched your temple with your free hand, already imagining the state in which your brother would arrive at the apartment.

You had asked him not to drink so much, but knowing his stubbornness, he certainly wouldn't listen to you like that. So you just shrugged.

"We can set up the session at your place tomorrow, what do you think?" your friend suggested a few minutes later, probably paying attention to the two of you calling and Jay mumbling something incomprehensible on the other end "That way you and Sunghoon can be together a bit more, since today didn't work out" she whispered, knowing that this had happened so that Jay wouldn't hear.

"I'd love to, actually" the sound of the doorknob made you jump up from the sofa, glancing at the door before it opened "They're here, I'm going to help them. See you tomorrow?"

"See you tomorrow, kitten" Callie said goodbye and hung up, and just as you did the same to put your cell phone on the coffee table, the door opened.

Your brother was hanging on to one of Sunghoon's shoulders, who was struggling against his weight to stand up. You ran the few steps closer to the two of them, holding back your laughter when your brother raised his head and looked at you with narrowed eyes.

"Y/n?" he looked at you, then at Sunghoon "Are we home?"

"We're home" Sunghoon was panting, holding the other boy's body up high enough.

"Shit Jake, what's gotten into you?" your voice had a worried tone, ignoring Sunghoon's gaze on you the whole time since he closed the door and entered the apartment.

"We bet" he sobbed, disentangling himself from Sunghoon's arms, "and I lost."

He kicked his shoes off his feet, keeping his socks on as he unbuckled his belt, throwing it into a corner of the living room.

"Okay, no naked here" Sunghoon ran up to him and grabbed Jake by the hands "Let's go to your room, you need a shower."

He even tried to deny it and protest, but he knew he wasn't up to it, especially since even you were harder than he was. You almost pushed him into the bedroom with Sunghoon's help.

"But… Wait…" Jake stopped at the door to his bathroom, turning around "You're not going to see me naked, are you?"

"No" Sunghoon laughed, followed by you "I'll just go in, she can sort out your nightclothes, how about that?" his gaze was on you again, and with a nod, you went to Jake's closet to get some clothes.

Your mind must have been wandering as you picked out something for your brother. Sunghoon was right there, under the same roof as you. It was strange to see him so suddenly, even though you were looking forward to meeting him that day.

It was always a surprise when you saw him because, every moment, Sunghoon was different. Not physically, you mean. But his features. Sometimes he was frustrated about something at work or college. Or even his sleepiness, which made him so cute. You felt like kissing him non-stop when he mumbled into your pillow that he didn't want to leave.

"Have you chosen?" Sunghoon appeared in the bathroom doorway. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, his pants were folded to his knees and yet all the fabric of his clothes was wet.

You realized that you had rambled on too long because Jake was already drying himself off while you were singing in the bathroom. Sunghoon just smiled in your direction as you handed him some clothes and he went back into the bathroom.

Less than a few minutes later they were both out. Jake with wet hair and a slightly better appearance. Sunghoon seemed to check the room, seeing the bottle of water that Jake always kept by his bed.

"It's full, he'll be fine" he said as he pointed to the object, you just nodded in agreement.

"Hey man, thanks" Jake yawned as he flopped onto the bed, still feeling everything around him spin. He waved for Sunghoon to come closer and so he did "Without you, I wouldn't be able to get home."

"You know I'm here for anything" Sunghoon smiled at him "Now, go to sleep, I have to go home and check on Heeseung and Jungwon."

Jake muttered something else that neither of you could understand, so all that was left was to agree and say goodnight. Letting your brother know that he would be in the next room if he needed.

You were the last to leave Jake's room, taking another look at your brother's sleepiness, who was now dozing off peacefully and so quickly. It was the effect of the drink that always made him fall asleep so quickly. So as soon as you turned off the lights, you carefully let the door close completely.

Before anything could be said, Sunghoon's hands traveled up to your face and, without effort, he got close enough to touch your lips with his. A slow kiss that tasted of alcohol because you knew he had been drinking too. Maybe not as much as your brother, but still, and that made the kiss taste so sweet on your tongue when you slid it into his mouth.

Kissing Sunghoon was incredible and dangerous at the same time, even more so in front of Jake's room. Knowing that he wouldn't wake up, nothing stopped the chill in your stomach from chasing you, even when Sunghoon pressed his body against yours at the exact moment your back met the wall. You moaned into his mouth, the contact of his fingers against your skin sliding down to your waist, lifting the T-shirt you were wearing to touch you there without warning.

"We… We can't…" you tried to catch your breath as his lips descended to your neck; without leaving a mark, but enough for his tongue to slide against your skin and send shivers down your spine.

"Shit" he cursed in a whisper before giving your neck one last kiss and aligning his face with yours. Leaning our foreheads against each other so he could be close enough to you "I missed you" he confessed.

That little sentence wreaked havoc on your heart, which was beating fast against your chest. You smiled, stealing another kiss from Sunghoon's lips and resting your hands against his face, one on each side.

"I missed you too" you said quietly.

"Leaving Jake was in my plans from the moment he asked me to go to that bar" Sunghoon's voice could only be heard because of how close the two of you were. Otherwise, it would have been difficult to hear him "I should have come to see you before anything else."

"It's okay" you tried to reassure him, leaving a kiss against his jawline "You're here now and I'm glad we were able to meet."

He was more than happy to see you too, and it showed in the bright look he was giving you. The small smile adorning his red lips and the subtle touch on your cheek before Sunghoon moved a little away from your body.

"Now I have to go and check on the boys" he slid his hands into yours, interlacing your fingers in his, "or it'll be dangerous kissing you here."

"Why can Jake see us?" you whispered jokingly.

He moved closer again, brushing his lips against yours as he bent down to meet you.

"Because I can dawdle in your room."

You felt your knees tremble at the intense gaze, the warm breath against your mouth, and the grip of his hands. But he was right. Sunghoon had to leave before it was too late.

"I'll see you tomorrow" he said, kissing you once more before pulling you out into the hallway, out of sight of Jake's bedroom door.

While you walked him to the door, stumbling on the way as you exchanged numerous kisses with him, your brother continued to sleep peacefully in his bed. Not even imagining the scene that was unfolding inside your shared apartment.

Jake thanked Callie for having a brilliant mind and suggesting study time in his apartment – or because she knew Jay's friends well enough to know that they would all be hungover – especially the boy who couldn't even open his eyes properly.

Your brother's head had been lying on your lap since everyone had arrived and gathered in your living room. You hadn't had much interaction with Sunghoon apart from the few minutes Jake had been in the bathroom when Sunghoon arrived, managing to steal a quick kiss from you before sitting down on the other side of the sofa and facing you.

"Man, I don't think I'll ever drink again" Jake whined, looking up to meet your eyes, which had previously been on the notebook you kept for studying.

"You say that every Saturday morning" you said, causing all his friends to laugh.

"You all could have at least taken it easy" Callie finished writing something down in her notebook, looking at Jay who was squinting at his book.

"Yeah, tonight I think we crossed a line" Heeseung almost cried when he felt a twinge in his head.

"How about some coffee?" you suggested.

"We love you more than we love your brother. You know that, don't you?" Jay looked at you with eyes that were so affectionate, but at the same time so pleading, asking you to really make yourself something strong to drink.

"Stay away from her" Jake huffed.

In the middle of the laughter and side conversations, you quickly glanced at Sunghoon to see him already looking at you. With a wink in your direction, you contented yourself with not running to grab him, let alone trying to look so shy at the way he stared at you.

You only came back to reality when you felt Jake get up from your lap and sit down next to you on the sofa while you chatted with the boys.

Study time taking a break for them to reminisce about last night's events. You and Callie just laughing at their antics or how Jungwon had done so badly at the billiards. He and Jake were a team, hence your brother's state last night when he got home, having lost a whole round to Jay and Heeseung, drinking more than he should have.

"But the winner last night was our friend, Sunghoon" you hoped your brother wouldn't notice that the moment Sunghoon's name was mentioned, you stopped typing your report on the laptop in front of you. Looking from the screen to the boy on the other side of the room, you knew he was avoiding you when he cursed your brother.

"Fuck off, Jake. Don't talk nonsense" Sunghoon said.

"Am I lying?" Jake laughed a little, followed by the other boys.

Your gaze quickly fell on Callie. She was already looking between you and Sunghoon, trying to think of something she could do.

"That girl lied when she said she didn't know how to play billiards just so Sunghoon would help her" Jay said nonchalantly, putting his notebook aside and running a hand through his hair.

"I think she was interested in another cue" Heeseung said "Ouch" he shouted as Callie threw a cushion in his direction, hitting him in the face.

Everything seemed too far away as they talked and insisted on talking about Sunghoon and what had happened. You heard enough to know that this subject was the cause of your blurred vision and the burning in your eyes.

It was impossible to type a single word, let alone to know whether they were calling you to a meeting or not. You just looked at Sunghoon, who kept his hands clenched into fists, his gaze on you as he kept himself from getting up from the sofa and walking towards you.

You got up with the excuse that now you could make the coffee they so desperately needed. Sunghoon managed to follow you saying that he would help you since he was the only one in the room who wasn't hungover apart from you and Callie. By some miracle, your brother didn't even object, going back to talking about something when you and Sunghoon disappeared from everyone's view.

"Y/n…" his voice entered your ears like a heartbreaking sound. You didn't turn around immediately, concentrating instead on getting the container from the machine to prepare what you needed "Y/n, please…"

Your work in ignoring him was proving successful. Concentrating on getting the number of cups you needed and putting the coffee you needed in the machine were enough for you not to focus on his presence right behind you. But it all came to nothing when Sunghoon's hands grabbed your waist, pulling you around and turning you to face him.

"Listen to me, please" he asked once again.

"I'm making the coffee" you tried to change the subject, but it was getting harder and harder as his fingers tightened around your waist. Sunghoon looked disappointed and you didn't understand why, after all, you were the one who had heard things that really made your heart sink.

"Absolutely nothing happened in that bar" he began, his hands softening around your waist when he noticed that you had your attention on him "She stood in front of me, asked me to teach her how to play, and when she leaned over the table I walked away. I walked away and—"

"Why are you telling me this?" the image of the events flashed through your mind and made your eyes sting even more. Sunghoon knew you would cry and it killed him inside because he was feeling guilty enough.

"Because you deserve to know."

"Guys" Callie whispered, making you and Sunghoon almost jump in your seats. He turned away from you for a moment, and that was enough for the tears to fall freely down your cheeks "Jake went to the bathroom, but I think he'll be in soon to check on the coffee."

"Thanks for the warning, Callie" Sunghoon thanked. He didn't know if he was worthy of such a thing.

"Can you two finish without me?" your voice was broken and you didn't want to go on, so you quickly walked past Sunghoon and Callie out of the kitchen and straight up to your room.

Your best friend stood there, knowing that Sunghoon had a lot to say. And since you didn't want to hear it now, maybe she could do it in your place if he wanted to tell you right now.

"Are you sure you don't want to go?" Jake looked at your figure wrapped in the blanket and sitting on the edge of the sofa. You agreed, giving your best smile to your brother as he left a kiss on your forehead and walked out the door.

Counting the weeks you avoided Sunghoon, adding up the times you cried because you refused his calls or didn't want to cross his path when he came to the apartment you shared with your brother. It was painful to have to think about it, even more so because you were in a fucking secret relationship… And why? Because of your brother's idiotic jealousy? Because Sunghoon didn't want to lose Jake's friendship? Or because both you and Sunghoon were cowardly enough not to say anything?

Too many questions and no answers to what you were feeling. That was unfair. So long in hiding to have to end up like that, with him after you and your tears falling every night because you couldn't forget the bloody scene that was described. And what's more, with all his friends - including your brother - commenting with the greatest joy. Of course, none of them knew about you and Sunghoon, but it still hurt. It hurt so much that it suffocated you in a way.

"Fuck" you almost shouted in fright when your phone rang.

Watching the movie credits roll by and noticing that you'd rambled on so long that you hadn't even looked at the ending, but it didn't matter, that comedy had been seen so many times that you'd even memorized the line.

On the second ring, a loud music noise was heard for the first time. You even thought about saying something, maybe they'd hear you, but your best friend's voice was quick enough.

"Y/n? You have to come here" Callie practically shouted to overpower the music, which had worked because you heard her voice so well.

"I told you I don't want to leave…"

"No, you don't understand. You have to, y/n" she emphasized, and something inside you screamed. Jumping up from the sofa and not even knowing why, you ran upstairs to your room.

"What happened?" while you put the call on speaker, looking for an outfit, Callie seemed to be looking for a quiet place to talk to you. Finding the party bathroom, she locked the door behind her to continue the call.

"Well, let's say Sunghoon told your brother about you and him" she said, "and now Jake's furious and swearing to kill him."

You almost tore the T-shirt you were wearing, running to your phone with a hysterical scream.

"He what?" you reached for the handset before taking it in your hands "Shit, shit, shit. What did Sunghoon do?"

"Baby, I don't know. But you need to come quickly."

That's what you'd do, of course. You just didn't know that getting changed in five minutes, ordering an Uber in three, and being at the party in ten minutes would seem like an eternity to you.

Meeting Callie and Jay at the entrance, your friend hugged you quickly while Jay wrapped his arms around your body.

"I'm sorry, please y/n, I'm sorry" Jay said while still hugging you, slowly releasing your body until you could face him.

"For what, exactly?"

"For that stupid thing" he said as he walked you and Callie into the party "If we knew about you two, neither of us would joke about it."

The only thing you could do was agree and lean on one of Jay's arms so as not to get lost in the party. Thanking him for his words that had really made you smile, warming a little of your heart that was getting faster and faster as he guided you and Callie to a more secluded spot.

A corridor illuminated by red and pink lights, hurt your eyes so much that you wondered how people managed to stand there. It was almost impossible to walk past and not get a headache or something.

When you stopped walking, Jay stepped in front of you and you felt Callie's arms intertwine with yours. A way of saying that she was there without saying a word. That's why she was your best friend.

Everything seemed too quiet for your liking. Your eyes traveled from your brother to Sunghoon, neither of them with any bruises or cuts on their faces, everything intact and without any scratches. At least no physical force had been used.

Jake was the first to get up, walking towards you as he watched Callie disentangle herself to get some distance away from you.

"Jake" you called him.

"Y/n" he called back, taking your hand and clearing his throat in the process "I'm an idiot."

"What?" your eyes flicked past him and then to Sunghoon. Your heart raced and your legs trembled at the small smile that adorned your brother's mouth.

"I heard some truths from Sunghoon and I know I was extremely stupid."

"You… You two…"

You looked at Callie and Jay, the two of them close to the others while you were further away with your brother. Only Sunghoon looked at you and Jake.

"We got into a bit of an argument, but it wasn't that big" he said, "Heeseung had the idea for Callie to call you like that or you wouldn't have come to us tonight."

"I'll kill that asshole" you whispered, feeling your eyes fill with tears as Jake pulled you into a hug.

"I'm sorry if everything that happened hurt you, I really am, y/n" he whispered between your hair, wrapping his arms even tighter around you "I let my stupid jealousy speak louder and I didn't realize what was best for you."

"I think I can take care of myself and you can do it with me too, Jake" you whispered back before he pulled away to kiss your forehead "You just don't have to deprive me of a relationship…"

"Did it have to be with one of my best friends?" he whined.

"Of course! She can't do that to anyone else" you and Jake abruptly turned to Sunghoon. He had a faint smile at the corner of his lips as he looked at you both and then fixed his gaze on your face.

"Is this the time I go out and leave you two alone?" Jake asked, seeing you and Sunghoon agree "Okay. I'll be right there, whatever" he nodded, turning away from you and going to find the rest of the group of friends.

Sunghoon moved a little closer, his hands coming out of his pants pockets to reach for your hand and entwine your fingers in his, pulling you closer.

You thought about calling him, saying something or simply cursing him for telling your brother without telling you first. But as soon as his lips touched yours, the softness of his mouth against yours, everything was forgotten.

That's where you had to stay, that's where you belonged from the first kiss you exchanged. Sunghoon knew it too. He was sure that he had found everything he needed from the first moment he saw you, and touched you. He also knew that it would be a huge obstacle to tell Jake and try to get around his enormous jealousy of his little sister. But he didn't know how he'd managed it. The drink might have helped him a little to confess, even though he'd heard Jake swear at him a lot and almost threaten to hit him again.

But it would all be worth it if he had you in the end. He wasn't going to give up and that's what motivated him to do what he did. That's why he was sharing that kiss for the - second - first time in front of everyone.

"Sunghoon" you called after him as you ended the kiss, controlling your breathing as his hands went to your face and caressed your cheeks "Why did you do that? Tell Jake…"

"Because I want you, y/n. Since the first time, I've always wanted you" his voice lowered so that you could hear him, his lips still brushing against yours as he kissed you slowly once more "I was a coward not to tell your brother before and I almost had to lose you to realize it."

"But you didn't lose me, you idiot" his laugh tickled your lips, loving the way he was holding you so precisely.

Sunghoon left one last kiss on your lips before pulling away and entwining your fingers in his, pulling you into the group and sitting back down on the sofa. He pulled you along, and you sat next to him in the circle while smiling contentedly at the happy looks on your friends' faces.

They all shared in the joy of finally being able to see you and Sunghoon together. Jake controlled his jealousy because he trusted his friend enough to take care of his sister.

"You know, I should have taken that bat and hit that girl in the head" Heeseung finished his can of beer after everyone had changed the subject, congratulating you and Sunghoon on the secret that everyone had just discovered, except Callie.

"Heeseung!" Sunghoon laughed, slapping the arm of his friend who was sitting across from him.

"What? It's serious!" he sounded serious, which made you laugh too. Because Heeseung managed to lighten the mood while the conversation took another turn.

Now and then you managed to catch Sunghoon's eyes on you, and this time with the certainty that you could kiss him in front of everyone, without having to hide.

#enhypen #enhypen fluff #sunghoon fluff #sunghoon angst #enhypen au #enhypen scenarios #enhypen sunghoon #park sunghoon fluff #park sunghoon angst #enhypen masterlist #enhypen angst #enhypen x reader #sunghoon fanfics #sunghoon x reader #park sunghoon x reader #enhypen imagines #bay writes.

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asharkapologist · 1 month ago

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Why David Jones Should 100% Sue Bromden Psychiatric Hospital

Okay so I've been brainrotted with S5 lately since I've been playing The Conspiracy out of order for fanfiction purposes and like I know this has been mentioned before but Jones has an amazing legal case against the crappy hospital Zoe was killed at. Let's go over everything they did that by itself would probably warrant a lawsuit, but altogether would legally annihilate them:

They allowed a serial killer to psychologically torture Zoe. Rosamund was even planning on killing her eventually. How on EARTH is a serial killer even allowed to interact with other patients like that? Rosamund should be in prison, not a psychiatric hospital.

Allowed an orderly with a clear conflict of interest (his brother was murdered and the killer got away with it due to "diminished responsibility" due to an insanity plea) to work around her and also harass her (calling her a murderer, vandalizing her mirror with such a message).

Let Louis into her room to put a HIDDEN. CAMERA. there. How on EARTH was that even possible? How on earth did he get into her room? Either he was just allowed to freely roam about the hospital and enter patients' rooms when they weren't there, which indicates that patient rooms aren't locked when they're empty, because Zoe would have obviously noticed him hiding a camera. Additionally, I'm not sure if visitors would even be allowed in a patient's room with no supervision. Did Louis drug her or something then plant the camera? How? I feel like Zoe would have realized that, too, if that had happened. Either way, it is a massive problem that visitors can just plant stuff to spy on patients.

There are tons of things in her room she could use to hurt herself.

@blugnettabutterflies helped me with this one. There are no working security cameras because Louis killed her in BROAD. FREAKING. DAYLIGHT. This one is even worse because there is a security camera as a collectable item in the hospital courtyard! It should have seen everything! Why is that not a valid thing to pick up?!

That thing should have been on, and the case would have been a lot shorter if it actually did its job. Gloria and the player would have seen it, and the following would have happened:

"Louis Leroux, you are under arrest for the murder of Zoe Kusama!"

"What? She was my friend! I would never kill her!"

*Plays camera footage showing their argument and her murder*

"Uhhh..."

Lets patients be by themselves with no supervision or protection or staff nearby. (again. Louis. He and Zoe were yelling at each other and then he killed her. While it's true that sharp/blunt force trauma can kill someone quickly, the fact that NOBODY was within earshot to hear to people yelling at each other and one of them KILLING the other, speaks volumes. The second there was yelling, staff should have come running. ) Nobody even seemed to know where she was! David and co. just stumbled into her!

Louis wasn't planning on killing Zoe that morning, meaning he probably didn't have a change of clothes when he went to gaslight/manipulate her into being a test subject again, which means he was probably COVERED in blood yet still? No one saw this man covered in blood from KILLING someone and immediately stopped him??? He literally was only able to wipe his hands with a piece of PAPER that he then threw away and NO ONE, no security cameras picked up on this? The bloody paper he threw away was in the common area! How was there no one else there? Was there, and when someone asked him why he was covered in blood, he made up some random excuse and they were like oh okay sounds good, carry on? How did no cameras pick him up? Did it go something like this?

The staff during the case: We have no idea who could have killed her, certainly not her ONLY VISITOR TODAY

Seems to be rundown. I know anger/frustration towards Zoe and desperation/fear (thanks to/of Denise) definitely gave Louis an adrenaline boost, but how on earth was he able to yank up/out a metal fence post from a fence that looks like this???

Anyway, that's my rant. David has an excellent case against the hospital, and should sue them into oblivion. Thanks, Carla, for helping me with this!

#criminal case game #criminal case #the conspiracy #zoe kusama #david jones #louis leroux #criminal case the conspiracy

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professorwerewolfmcwerewolf · 18 days ago

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Okay okay, y'all. Imagine Jay during this.

He knew neither of his parents were gonna show up, and Will was in New York, so maybe Jay didn't even tell him about it. He didn't wanna distract from med school. But one of Jay's friends (probably Mouse, but idk if they went through basic training together or just deployment, but it also sounds like a pretty Mouse thing to do) calls Will in advance.

Jay thinks he'll just have to stand there at attention and listen as most of his fellow soldiers reunite with family until a kind person taps him out with a look of sympathy or, worse, pity. He's not looking forward to it. At all. Sure, it means he completed basic training, but it's not much more.

Will's there. He was grinding even harder at school the past week or two so he'd have less to worry about while he missed. He has enough unused absences to miss a few days. (Ngl I'm applying community college knowledge to ivy league medical school so I don't actually know the ins and out of missing a few days of classes.) But he's not gonna miss this.

He's not shocked when he's waiting there as family members of everyone else arrive, and his parents are nowhere to be seen. He hadn’t been sure if he was going to try staying with them, but he's sure it's not a good idea now. He would not keep quiet about them missing this. Hell, he'd love to go tell dad off about it anyway. But that's not what he'd want to come home from, so he's not gonna stress Jay out. See, he can, in fact, take the high road.

So once the family side of the field (or room?) is free to go tap out their loved one, Will silently makes his way over to stand in front of Jay, whose face impressively shows no indication of whether or not he can feel someone standing there, and knocks on his chest lightly. Jay's arms relax as he opens his eyes, and the default appreciative half smile he was gonna give a stranger only appears as a flicker before excited shock takes over.

Will grins and pulls him into a tight hug. He's not actually thrilled about his little brother wanting to ship out and risk his life, but that'll never stop him from being anything but proud of him.

#uh so #gotta tell yall #I've only seen a handful of episodes of Chicago PD or Med...#I've seen all of Fire lol #but please forgive me if the characterization is a bit off #most of my knowledge comes from fanfics and fandom wiki #chicago pd #chicago med #jay halstead #will halstead #jay halstead & will halstead #halstead brothers #jesse lee soffer #nick gehlfuss #military thing #basic training #tap out tradition

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arxxq · 2 years ago

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The name Scaramouche, kunikuzushi and kabukimono has been forgotten in the world of teyvat, no one but the traveler knows him now...but what if there was someone other than the traveler who still remembers him? someone who wanderer cherished and loved...(I apologize for the small text used, it looked cute to use)

(apologizing if I mentioned she/her pronounces I'll fix it one day..I write in my perspective and I'm a female...so that's why there might be things indicating this for a female but I promise you all genders may read)

(first time writing genshin)

(mistakes will be fixed one soon)

You're no human that's for sure...or were you human?

You never considered yourself as human...maybe because you were cursed to live an external life. Ever since the downfall of what we know as the fallen nation, you were cursed with immortality. You were no one important but a citizen of inazuma but why is it were you cursed as well?

Could it be because you have never saw yourself as a human being? or was it because you never had a reason to live? You never knew.

Living for centuries and decades you were all alone till one day you met him. A puppet he told you. He told you he was a puppet created by his mother or in other words the electro archon but was then discarded by her. The puppet named himself kunikuzushi.

Your interaction with him was quite unexpected. He seemed so tense, like a closed book. But from that day onwards you vow to yourself to be his friends no matter how many times he had refused...

As time goes on in teyvat you succeeded. You stayed by his side no matter what. Even if those time he had changed to be a ruthless fatui member, you never failed to stay. Even when he joined the fatui you gladly stayed with him even after what he had done...and instead of being his friend the two of you became more of lovers instead.

But you never liked it how he joined the fatui. You had mixed feelings of it. You don't trust anyone in it including the cryo archon the tsaritsa. But the person you absolutely held suspicion on was the doctor also known as dottore.

Years adds on, one day you informed scaramouche that you'll be returning to inazuma to see how much the city changed after hearing a brave traveler had saved it. Scaramouche was hesitant to let you go but he did but what he didn't tell you was that he was headed to sumeru for something you would never had agreed on.

you enjoyed your time in inazuma and even made alot of acquaintances but something felt off. You never heard anything from Scaramouche, no letters at all. It didn't feel right. That's when you decided to ask a fatui guard. Lucky for you they didn't ambush you but when you asked...you were in disbelief when they said they don't know who this "balladeer" you were talking about.

You explained to them he was the 6th harbinger but they all assumed you were crazy and delusional. "I'm sorry ma'am but the 6th spot has remain empty for years...are you okay?" You heart broke. What in teyvat happen to your lover. "Ah..I'm sorry my head must be playing games on me..sorry to interrupt," you played along. You were in utter shock. It was as if your beloved was wiped from teyvat's existence.

To say the least you were devastated. It felt as if you were crumbling from teyvat's surface once more.

That was months ago. You decided to travel instead, well with the help of one if the friends you made. Without captain beidou and kazuha you might as well be...well hopeless. They helped you with your grief although they themselves know nothing of this person you grief of.

One day as you were walking with nahida you caught a glimpse of someone you had missed so much. "Uhm miss nahida?" You called out for the archon. The archon looked at you and smiled. "Something the matter [name]?" You look at the direction of that familiar male. "Do you somehow know who that is?"

You then afterwards head of to explore a nation you absolutely adored from it's name, culture and it's wisdom. The land of wisdom, sumeru. The more you spent in sumeru the more attached you were to the land. You even somehow came across the hero of the 4 nations aether/lumine was his/her name along with the great archon of sumeru nahida.

Nahida looked at the person you looked at and she simply answered you. "He's just a wanderer, why you ask?" You look at the male again and replied with an answer that shocked that archon. "He looks like the balladeer...well not like you know him,"

"oh..well I don't know who that might be but he seemed like someone you really care of," silence took over till you whispered "yeah...he was,"

It was midnight, you were never able to sleep or in other words you never usually sleep or needed it. So you decided to take a stroll outside and go to a cliff you'd usually go. Usually during this time, When Scaramouche was still with you, you'd usually sleep with him or sing a lullaby for him just so he'd calm down whenever he was stressed. Oh how you missed him.

The breeze of the wind on this hill and the view...it all looked so calm and relaxed. You closed you eyes enjoying the silence and the wind. Meanwhile you didn't had realised someone behind you. The male it was none other than the wanderer nahida said but as I said you haven't noticed him yet.

In the wanderer's perspective he looked shocked to see you because he knows you. You are no...you were the love of his life back when he was still known as Scaramouche who is know forgotten. You were the person that never left his side, his lover that promise him. You promised to never leave and you fulfill it but he was the one who broke it by leaving you all alone. But he had no choice. Part of him knows he can't have you back but part of him wanted you to remember him..

some people say that your love would be meant to be...just not the right time. What was it called, right person wrong time? He didn't care. He wanted you back, he craved for you touch, your voice but he can't have it back. He doesn't want to restart. No no no he doesn't because the thing you had with each other was something special. Something that cannot be restart with once more.

While Scaramouche or wanderer was lost in his head, he didn't know that certain someone had noticed his presence. "Lost in thought are you strange wanderer," your voice had snapped him from his thoughts. The voiced that he loved so much to listen. "What are you doing here? It's dangerous for a someone like you to be out at this time,"

"are you saying I'm weak? I can defend myself you know I'm not a little girl/boy," Scaramouche took in your appearance, you certainly had changed especially since you had a vision dangling down your waist. "Staring is rude you know?"

"bold of you assume I was, show some respect," he said. You laughed. "Hey wanna know a fun fact," you asked him. "Not that I'm interested but go on I'm listening," he looked you, the way you smiled as if you were recalling something so deep in your heart and memories. The soft gaze you had towards him, it clearly warmed his heart.

"you remind me so much of my lover...his name was Scaramouche, but I call him kunikuzushi.." those words caught him off guard. Did you just...you uttered the name that was forgotten. How...how were you able to remember. "I'm sorry if I offended you! It's just that you look so much like him. You hair, your eyes, your voice and the way you speak! Basically almost everything match up,"

"I really miss him...but it's as if he vanished from the world. At first I was assuming you were him but...nahida and so many others told me you were just a wanderer so...I guess I lost hope once again," a tear fell from your eyes...sadness really ingulf the atmosphere now.

" I miss him so much..I miss just talking or looking at him...ah sorry I'm being to emotional sorry for rambling"

he was speechless. He couldn't say anything. The way you rambled about him, the fact you remembered him. He wanted to say something but tears broke out before he could utter a word. His knees even gave up...was this what they called mixed feelings. he felt relief yet happy but then again sad.

"hey wait why are you crying!? I'm sorry I didn't mean to-" "you remembered me.." he muttered. "What? Come again?" "You never forgotten who I really am..."

You looked confused. "What do you mean...aren't you just coincidence? Everyone told me he doesn't exist what do you imply exactly?" Was it really him. Was this person you have been searching for, yearning for... The person you mourn and grief.

"[nickname]...you really do remember me," that nickname...no one used it before. No one dared called you that because the only person who did was none other that Scaramouche. Tears came running like a waterfall...you vision was blurry and you embraced him as if you never wanted to let him go again.

"I'm not dreaming or hallucinating am I...I am seeing the kunikuzushi I love right?" His hand held you cheek. The hand of his was reached you cheek and wiped the tears. His touch, you were sure it was him.

Your head tells you it's not him but you're soul knows that it's him. "Now why would I lie to you my love..." This was him. You know it and you finally found him. "I don't know how you still remember me but I would like answers from you..." You look at him and thought of your answer...

"I never forgot you my love...

And that's because...

my love for you is too strong for the world to make me forget you,"

hmm it seems like those two were perfect for each other weren't they? Cause even if the world tried to take them apart, fate will always bring them back together no matter how big the challenge make be.

This is the end...

of the story named..

MEMORABLE..

-sincerely

hasinah/Arxx

#works of arxxqblog #·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳aryssa;hasinah #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin imagines #genshin impact #wanderer x reader #wanderer fluff #wanderer #genshin wanderer #scaramouche fluff #scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #deeply sorry its been a while i wrote #first time writing genshin #im rusty #i had a writers block y'all

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turtlecleric · 7 months ago

Text

Bay!Mikey (insert save me meme here)

CWs: negative/self-deprecating thoughts

You consider it. Calling Mikey. Asking him to come over, to hold you until this sadness fades enough for you to feel like a person again. You consider it, and you get as far as hovering your thumb over the call icon before you sigh and lock your phone once more.

You shouldn't bother him. You're not exactly... fun to be around right now.

But. But he'd told you to call him the next time you felt like this. He'd specifically asked you to. Surely that means it's okay? Surely that means you should...

No. No, he was just being nice. He's such a nice guy, of course he would say that. And you believe he meant it, you do. But how could you do this to him? Subject him to this- this miserable thing that you've become?

Better to wait it out alone, you think. Like you always have. That way, no one else gets caught in the crossfire.

...You make it twenty minutes before you're pulling up his contact again. Maybe you could just. Text him. Or send him a meme? Or something. Just- just something that might garner a response without obligating him into anything.

You start to type out a casual greeting, but you quickly delete it. You try another, but... no, that's no good, either. Everything you think of saying seems... wrong. Or strange. Or stupid or rude or-

Okay. Well. You can just send him a meme.

You find one you know he'd like, and you make it all the way until it's time to press send until the doubt creeps in. What if he doesn't like it? What if it annoys him? What if you annoy him?

No, you're being irrational and far too harsh on yourself again. He's never indicated that he's found you annoying. Never. Your brain is just being mean.

...Right?

Fuck, you can't do it. You can't do it. That's so fucking ridiculous, isn't it? That you can't even send your friend a meme that you think he'd like because of your stupid inability to stop overthinking every little thing?

But what if you're right? What if you do annoy him? If you stop listening to that voice of warning, then you'll be even more annoying than you already are. He'll get tired of you. He'll stop wanting to talk to you, he'll pull away, and you'll deserve it.

Fuck. Fuck. Why are you crying?

Pathetic. That's what you are. A stupid, pathetic girl who can't do anything right, even something as simple as this. How could you ever even consider calling him when this is what he'd have to deal with? How could you-

There's a quick tapping at your window, and you freeze. Before you can do much else, the window opens and Mikey steps through, calling your name softly.

It's dark. You've got all the lights off, so the only light source comes from the window, but still, his eyes manage to find you within a few seconds. He bounds over to you, whispering excitedly about something. You're still reeling from the fact that he's here.

He crouches in front of you, and his chatter stops abruptly. You can't make out his expression in the darkness, but you do see the dark shape of his hand slowly reaching toward your face. He cups your cheek, and you can't help but lean into it. His thumb brushes across your cheek, smearing the tears there.

"Hey," he says, now somber instead of excited. "You okay? What's wrong?"

You open your mouth to answer, but instead you dissolve into tears. Immediately, he's wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close. Nuzzling into your hair and murmuring soft words that only make you cry harder. You cling to him, shaking apart in his arms and burning with embarrassment.

"I'm here," he says. "I've got you, Starburst, it's okay. It's alright."

It's not. It's not alright. You're being a burden. An annoying, whiny, pathetic thing that he would be so much better off without, even if he doesn't know that.

Starburst, he calls you. Something bright and beautiful, and that's... not you. That will never be you. But you can't say that. He would just feel obligated to contradict it, because he's nice. And kind. And thoughtful.

Because he's Mikey.

And you're... this.

"I'm sorry," you whimper against his plastron, swiping at your eyes miserably. "I'm sorry, Mikey, I'm so sorry."

He shushes you, petting your hair. "Nothing to apologize for. It's alright. Everything is alright."

No. It's not.

But you let him hold you anyway.

---

Tag list: @yorshie @luckycharms1701 @khayalli @thejudiciousneurotic @justalotoffanfiction @mxalmighty @thelaundrybitch @shakeyourtrees

#turtlecleric scrolls #bay!mikey

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miscling · 6 months ago

Text

About Miscling! (updated!)

This is a horny blog for horny blog things. Please don't interact if you're a minor/under 18, go away, shoo. if you follow me, make sure to have some indication of your age in your bio or pinned

😵‍💫🥰😵‍💫

hi! i have a lot of different names, but for now you can call me misc! I am a girl, toy, doll, kitty, ditz, and mama. i love talking to people and getting lots of asks. send me things like ask meme questions, fantasies, confessions, or just ask me how i’m doing! i especially love getting tasks to do, and have an ask-task list you can use to give me things to do! i love being an obedient good girl, and especially love getting lots of praise. i’m an exhibitionist, submissive, and easily controlled by people who make me feel safe.

since this is a hornyblog, i like to follow other hornyblogs. i’m a trans woman who has a cunt, and i’m also autistic and have adhd, so i reblog stuff about that sort of thing too. i make porn and erotica for fun, which i post here. you can expect posts about edging, hypno kink, bondage, bdsm, fetishwear, tickling, masochism, petplay (i'm a kitty), hucows/lactation, monsterfucking, CNC, mindbreaking, dollification, dronification, and mommy/daughter fauxcest. i’m a subby bottom, even though i’m mommy to a few. i don’t domme, but i will tease other subs i think are cute once i get to know them.

i am poly, queer, kinky, and trans, and i’m in the UK. i’m very interested in talking to others who are the same. if you’re queer and trans, let’s be friends! i am mostly t4t, and like real life play, i’m not so much into roleplay, and i’m not looking for exclusive ownership. i like to play with lots of people and have lots and lots of fun!

i don’t really think of myself as a person so much as i think of myself as a fae-coded creature, a pet of some sort, and toy for others to enjoy. real people don’t wish they weren’t people, after all.

if you’ve read my pinned, like it! then you should send me an ask telling me what your favourite kink is and why!

Below the readmore: Tags and Links, Limits, and my Ask Task List!

Tags and links:

About Miscling contains every post that's about me.

You can find pics of me in Miscling Appears. (it's okay to go on a reblogging and liking spree through them) i make original posts under Miscling Rambles and posts about my lactation journey in Miscling Lactates i also make polls, which you can find in my Miscling Polls tag. you can hear my voice in the Miscling Speaks tag and over at my soundgasm page!

You can send me tasks with my ask tasks meme! I will take tasks from literally anyone ^^ you can see tasks I've done here! If you like or follow my blog, think about sending me a task as a little gift!

I learned to edge last year and was broken by a poll I ran to get permission to cum here then here and here. i hope to never cum again without being forced. i can't be forced to cum over the internet. i kept an edging diary for a while and the last time i came was 1feb24.

I love to write, and I especially like to write about kink. Read bits about my play with Miscling Plays and stories I wrote with Miscling Writes.

Use my ask box liberally, anon or not. i'll answer near anything and you can use my ask meme tag and miscling answers to find questions to ask me (scroll the tag and use any meme you like, but copy in the questions or link the meme!)

I have a lovense wishlist (long distance remote vibrators)

I have an amazon wishlist (lingerie and random kink things)

I have a cashapp link (if you just want to tip me directly)

I have a ko-fi link! (please don't reference anything nsfw on kofi if you use this)

I'm trying to tag my kinks so i can find them when i want them, this is no guarantee that i'll tag things though. mommysub for posts about being a mommysub, goddess thoughts for religionplay where i'm a subby goddess, Bind Miscling for bondage, hit me for masochism, moo for hucow things, lee mood for tickling, oh my circuits for robot/drone things, maid day for maids, tidy up tuesday for my maid day, monsterling for monsterfucking posts, hypno gif, spiral, hypno txt, and hypnaudio, for hypno play, and hypnoslut for general hypno posts, preyling for primal play, latexcellent for rubberwear, and as i figure out others i'll add them...

Also, I have some limits:

i have a nest partner, i won't let anything come between us

i do not like misogyny, transphobia, racism, or bigotry. This applies to kink too.

i don't like possessive language, only people i trust can own me

please don't try to make me cum or ask/tell me to

don't call me a bitch or a puppy. i like puppy petplayers a lot, but i am a kitty petplayer.

i don't like being treated as inferior, i might be submissive, but i should still matter and be treated with care and respect

sissy blogs dni, i am a woman, do not reblog my pics to your sissy blog, i will block you if i spot you.

Finally:

i am a toy for others to enjoy!

(Most tasks recieved and completed in one day: 18) (Most tasks recieved on a special occasion: 48)

ASK TASKS: OPEN

use my ask box to send me tasks to do! i'd love to entertain and perform for you all! i am a good and obedient girl, and i enjoy getting tasks to do!

choose one or more task emoji and send them to me! include instructions if you send complicated tasks

tasks can come from anyone, even anons!

i'll do tasks as soon as i can! basic tasks i'll do on my own, but i'll need help for the slightly more complicated ones so they might be a little while!

Mutuals can DM me, and if i'm available we'll play ^^

BASIC TASK LIST!

🗜️ make me wear nipple clamps for 5 minutes! 📦 make me wear 10 pegs on my cunt for 10 minutes! 🤚 make me slap my cunt 10 times! ⚡ choose a part of me and make me use my TENS unit there for 10 mins. 😺/🐮 petplay! make me put on my animal ears based on which one you send! 🤐 make me gag myself for half an hour! (tell me what kind of gag to use and if I have it I'll use it, otherwise I'll pick) 🧣 make me put on my collar if i'm not already wearing it! 👗 make me get undressed and be naked for the next 30 mins! ✏️ make me write what you tell me on my body where you tell me! 💖 make me draw a little heart on myself where you tell me! 🗣️ ask me anything, name a kink or give me a topic to write about (kinky or otherwise) and make me infodump about it. 🔊 send me a post or a write something for me to record saying, and i'll post the recording. 🫴 make me edge for 10 minutes (Send me instructions, porn, a post to edge to, or a mantra to repeat while I do it, you can use my mantra tag for ideas or my spiral tag.) 🕳️ make me plug my cunt for 30 minutes! 👅 make me stick my tongue out for 10 minutes! 💋 make me go practice deepthroating for 10 minutess! 🚼 make me go put on a diaper for at least an hour and use it next time i need the bathroom! 🍇 make me go get a snack and a drink! ❌ make me go take a break outside for 5 mins! 😴 make me go lay down in bed for 15 mins, no screens allowed.

SLIGHTLY MORE COMPLICATED TASK LIST!

👋 i'll ask my nestie to tickle me for 5 mins! (check my toybox) 🖐️ i'll ask my nestie to slap me 10 times! choose my face or tits 🏓 i'll ask my nestie to hit me 10 times! choose my ass or thighs (check my toybox) 👣 i'll ask my nestie to put elastic bands around my feet and snap the band against my soles 10 times. (nestie enjoys doing this to me) ⛓️ i'll get myself tied up and restrained for 30 mins! 🥊 No hands! make me put on my hand mitts for 15 minutes!

Or...

⁉️ Give me a task not listed! (You can find the contents of my toybox here for ideas) (I reserve the right to safeword, but I'm very open and obedient, so shoot your shot)

#about miscling #misc pinned post

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lucidlivi · 1 year ago

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I Can See You (I)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

Tag List: @jc-winchester @mrsjenniferwinchester @perpetualabsurdity @antisocialcorrupt @heavenlyackles @anixiiee @jackles010378 @suckitands33 @deans-spinster-witch @k-slla @alternativeprincess @spnbaby-67 @cevansbaby-dove @cutedisneygrl (if you would like tagged in this, please send me a message or an ask with the title so I can make sure to keep my tags straight!)

story takes place during filming of season two of supernatural so the ages will make more sense!

switching points of view indicated with italics

a little mini series for you, I hope you like!

All my life, the only thing I ever wanted was to be noticed.

I wanted my parents to notice when I had done well on a test that was hard for me.

I wanted my friends to notice when I was quiet or felt out of the loop.

I desperately wanted that cute guy in my biology class to notice that I had spent the entire semester taking detailed notes just so I could help him study.

I just wanted someone, anyone to notice me.

It was never me though.

It was always my older brother Jared.

It was like he always had to one up me.

Nothing was ever mine.

For example, whenever I would ace a test, Jared would somehow be offered some prestigious award for academics.

He hung out with all the popular guys, and the girls practically threw themselves at him.

It was like he didn’t even have to try.

It's only gotten worse since he'd landed a starring role on the new hit show Supernatural.

Jared didn't know if they would even make it past the first season, but the show was an instant success. It catapulted him to stardom. Girls from all over the world were crazed about my brother.

It kind of grossed me out.

I had to admit, I was getting a lot of recognition now too, but it was always (y/n) Padalecki, sister of Jared, and never just (y/n).

I mean I love my brother to death, he's the best, but sometimes it would feel nice not to be so, so invisible.

I stretched my muscles with a sigh.

I had finally landed in Canada.

I was going to be visiting Jared for awhile, while they filmed season two of supernatural. I missed him like crazy.

I was also taking a much needed break from fashion school in New York.

"Moose!" I squealed, spotting the top of my brother's head.

I could hear Jared groan from across the airport. I chuckled as he hated being called Moose.

I pushed through the crowd of people, finally seeing my brothers dorky face.

He rolled his eyes before pulling me in to a bone crushing hug.

"I missed you moose." I said as I squeezed him.

"I missed you too brat." Jared laughs.

He lets me go, setting me back on my feet.

"come on, Jensen's waiting for us back at our house." Jared said grabbing my bag.

"wait you and Jensen are living together?" I asked, my cheeks tinting with a blush.

"yeah, we decided to just rent a place together this season, it'll be easier, is that okay?"

"mmhmm." I nodded not trusting my voice to formulate an actual answer.

Jensen Ackles.

my brother's crazy hot co-star.

and according to him, best friend, besides me of course.

I met Jensen before they started filming season one.

Jared and Jensen went on "bonding" trips together, I guess to make playing brother's more believable. I had been invited on a few. Of course I was always pushed to wayside, but I didn't mind.

It gave me the opportunity to gawk at the eye candy that is Jensen Ackles.

He wasn't just hot though.

He was more complex then that.

He was kind, he was funny, he was easy to get along with.

and I was completely crushing on him.

It didn’t matter though.

It wasn't like he noticed me.

I was completely off his radar.

"how's design school?" Jared asked breaking the silence.

"I just needed a break I guess. It's a cutthroat industry, and I don't know if I'm cut out for it." I admitted.

"what of course you are, you're insanely talented! I mean why do think I always call you before award shows? I trust you to make sure I don't look like a dork!" Jared laughed.

"well I hate to break it to you moose, but you always look like a dork, the clothes aren't going to help you." I smirked, earning a punch to the arm.

"ugh thanks to you the entire supernatural cast calls me moose now!" Jared groans.

"well if the shoe fits." I shrugged earning another punch to the arm.

"I could always call you gigantor, if you like that better." I added pushing my brother's buttons.

"I think we'll stick with moose."

Jared pulls in to a condominium.

It's beautiful, fit for celebrities I guess.

"wow, living the high life I see." I said as my eyes traveled around the luxurious condo.

"It's definitely crazy."

I gazed at my brother, seeing his shoulders slumped over.

I can't imagine how he was feeling.

I mean his life basically changed overnight. He can't go out now without girls flocking him. He has no privacy.

I know he won’t let it show, but I could tell the pressure that comes along with his new found fame gets to him sometimes.

I walked over to my brother wrapping my arms around his tall frame, squeezing him again.

"I'm really glad you're here brat, it's kind of nice to have some sense of normalcy." Jared said running a hand through my hair.

"hate you." I whispered with a smile.

"hate you too." Jared smirked.

I stepped away from Jared, just as the door flung open revealing Jensen.

"is that baby moose I hear out here? "

I swallowed harshly as he came over wrapping his arms around me in a hug. I felt the blood rush to my cheeks and I hugged him back, nonchalantly taking in his sweet scent.

"Hi J." I said quietly.

Jensen stepped back, letting his eyes rake over me. I couldn't help but shrink under his gaze.

It was intimidating.

I took this time to stare at him too.

He's different.

His muscles were more defined now, signifying he'd been working out for the role.

His hair was still short but messy.

He had a very light stubble on his face that made his jawline more defined.

He looked good.

Better than good.

He looked sexy.

I heard Jared clear his throat loudly, making me tear my eyes away from Jensen. A heat spread throughout my body.

I wondered what Jensen was thinking.

"Jensen and I have a meeting with the director, I'll uh help you take your things in and then you can get settled while we're gone." Jared said.

I nodded my head as Jared grabbed my bag from the trunk, taking it inside.

"it's nice to see you baby moose." Jensen said offering me a cheeky smile before getting in the car.

I bit my lip, hiding the blush that spread to my cheeks. I followed Jared in to the house, which was even more extravagant on the inside.

"I guess it pays to be famous." I said spinning around to get a complete view.

"I'm not famous, just lucky." Jared laughed.

"yeah that's why a fangirl followed me around in the grocery store the other day, asking me a million questions about you."

"wait that actually happens?" Jared laughed.

"more times than I would care to admit." I said joining in Jared's laughter.

our laughter died down, a comfortable silence settling in between us.

"uh your room is upstairs, the third door on the right, next to Jensen's, you sure you're going to be okay here?" Jared asked handing me my duffle bag.

"I think I'll manage."

"I'll be back soon."

Jared placed a kiss on my forehead, before going out to join Jensen in the car. I watched them drive away before going to find my room.

Jensen

Jared got in the car giving me a stern look.

"what?" I asked innocently.

"don't what me, dude that's my sister." Jared growled.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I smirked.

"just keep your eyes away from my sister."

"I wasn't even looking." I laughed as I pulled out of the drive way heading over to the studio.

I was looking though.

She was different.

She looked different.

Her hair was longer.

She definitely grew in to her body.

She was no longer the lanky girl I had come to know.

I would be lying if I said my eyes didn't linger on her now defined chest.

She looked good.

Better than good.

She looked beautiful.

Fuck.

I shouldn't be thinking like this.

I mean this was my best friend's sister.

I know Jared would kill me if he knew I was thinking this way.

I better stop.

I didn’t want to though.

"hello, earth to Jensen." Jared said waving a hand in front of my face.

"sorry man, what did you say?"

"I asked if you were coming."

I looked up seeing we were in the parking lot of the studio.

I wasn't sure when we arrived, or how we arrived in one piece considering I wasn't paying attention.

"uh yeah sorry, just thinking about this meeting." I lied smoothly.

I just hope I can focus enough so I don't lose my job.

Reader

I finally settled in, unpacking my things and familiarizing myself with the layout of the house. It's been over two hours and the boys still aren't home.

I heard my stomach rumble.

I was starving.

I walked down to the kitchen, opening the fridge. I saw some ham and cheese.

Oh gosh a sandwich sounds good right now. I looked around in the cabinets, looking for the bread.

I finally found it, high up on a shelf.

Moose.

He needs to learn that not everyone is as freakishly tall as he is.

I stood on my tiptoes reaching for it, but alas I didn't get the height genes that Jared had. I huffed blowing a piece of hair from my face. I stood on my tiptoes trying again.

I heard a chuckle from behind me, causing me to snap my head back.

"need some help there baby moose?"

I blushed a deep red as Jensen came up behind me, reaching the bread with ease.

I could feel the heat radiating from his body just from the proximity.

I wondered what it would be like to be this close to him in a heated moment.

I let my imagination run wild for a moment before realizing he still lingered behind me.

He cleared his throat before stepping away.

I let out a shaky breath I didn't know I was holding.

"thanks." I whispered shyly.

"you know for a baby moose, you aren't all that tall." Jensen smirked.

"yeah, no Jar stole all those genes." I said causing him to chuckle.

"well baby moose I will gladly reach the bread for you anytime." Jensen said making me blush harder.

I'm sure I looked like an idiot from how bad I was blushing over his words.

"uh is Jared back?" I managed to choke out.

"uh not yet, they needed him to shoot a promo for the new season, he asked me to come check on you." Jensen said sitting down at the kitchen island.

I rolled my eyes at his protectiveness.

I was twenty two now.

I didn't need a babysitter.

"Jared still thinks I need a babysitter." I spoke as I took out two pieces of bread starting to make a sandwich.

"he's just worried about you."

"I can handle myself."

"I have no doubt about that." Jensen said.

I snuck a glance at him, accidentally meeting his eyes. He wore a smirk on his plump lips that got my heart racing.

"I have to, I mean now that you two are like major celebrities." I laughed.

"okay, hang on I was major celebrity before supernatural." Jensen joked.

I rolled my eyes throwing my cheese wrapper at him.

He dodged it with ease laughing at my antics.

"of course how I could I forget your starring role on Dawson's Creek."

"I don't know because I definitely made season six of that show." Jensen laughed.

“I never watched it.” I shrugged.

Okay that wasn’t exactly the truth.

I did watch it.

I watched it for him.

“well we’ll definitely have to change that.” Jensen said getting up from the island.

I let my eyes linger on his form as it retreated up the stairs.

I was hopeless.

I was completely hooked on someone I would never have.

I sighed sitting down and digging in to my sandwich. I didn’t realize how hungry I was.

I heard the door open, seeing Jared walk in.

He sat down beside me taking the other half of my sandwich.

“I made that for me you ass!” I whined hitting his chest.

“yeah out of my fridge!”

I rolled my eyes.

He had a point.

“how was your meeting?” I asked as we ate.

“really good, we’re all excited for filming to start.”

I wondered what it would be like to be on camera. I definitely didn’t have a face or body for film.

“actually there’s this party tomorrow, for the cast, kind of like a kick off to the new season, do you want to come with me?” Jared asked.

I was never a big fan of parties.

Jared always tried to get me to go to high school parties but it was never my thing.

“I guess, but just for you.” I said booping his nose.

I finished my sandwich, making sure to clean up after myself.

“I’m uh going to head to bed early, I’m exhausted from the flight.” I said giving Jared a hug.

I jogged up the steps towards my room. I felt the heat radiating from the bathroom as I passed it.

I could see the door was slightly cracked.

I peaked in seeing Jensen in only a towel.

He was wiping the condensation off the mirror.

I couldn’t stop my eyes from traveling over his toned chest and back.

I swallowed the lump in my throat as I stared.

I would give anything to be able to run my hands down his body.

I bit my lip, forcing my body to move away from the door before I was caught staring.

I crashed on to the bed, letting my thoughts linger on the gorgeous man.

I wondered what his lips tasted like.

I wondered how it would feel to have his hands caressing my body as we kissed.

I wondered how his body would feel on top of mine.

I choked back a moan as I thought about him in such an intimate way.

A loud knock on my door tore me away from my thoughts.

I quickly sat up, I could feel just how flushed I was.

“uh come in.” I squeaked.

I was surprised when Jensen came in setting a laptop on my bed. I gave him a confused look as he typed away.

“Dawson’s Creek season six.” He smiled turning the laptop towards me.

I laughed as I brought the laptop to my lap.

“I’ll leave you to it.” Jensen said walking towards the door.

“aren’t you going to watch it with me?” I asked slightly disappointed.

“oh no, I never watch myself on tv, but make sure you pay attention cause I’m going to quiz you tomorrow.” He said.

I rolled my eyes at his antics.

“Goodnight Jensen.”

“Goodnight baby moose.”

I hit play, even though I had already seen every episode he was in.

I watched anyways.

I watched until I couldn’t keep my eyes open.

I watched until I fell into a deep slumber, plagued by dreams of a man I know I would never have.

I woke up to a light pounding on my door. It was bright out, but still appeared to be early morning.

Jared strode in wearing running gear.

It was nice to see he still took his morning runs.

It was something that always made him feel at peace, helped with his anxiety.

“ugh what time is it?” I groaned throwing a pillow over my head to block out the sun.

“five am, come on a run with me.” Jared beamed.

“Jared normal people don’t go for runs at five in the morning.”

“good thing you’re far from normal.” Jared joked pulling the pillow away from my face.

“I don’t want to go for a run, I want to sleep.” I pouted.

“pretty please, for me?”

I glanced up at Jared to see him giving me the puppy dog eyes.

Damn.

He knows I can’t say no to his puppy dog eyes.

“you better get me an extra large cup of coffee after this.” I groaned throwing my legs over the side of the bed.

I threw on some workout clothes, making my way downstairs. I was surprised to see Jensen standing in the kitchen in workout gear.

Fuck.

I was uncoordinated, and the last thing I wanted to do was run in front of Jensen.

“you managed to get baby moose to come, impressive.” Jensen smirked.

I rolled my eyes grabbing a bottle of water.

“I uh hope you didn’t stay awake too long watching your new favorite show.” Jensen said laughing.

“It was alright, Pacey is definitely my favorite character.” I shot back walking past him towards the door where Jared was waiting.

“and what about CJ?”

“I mean he was alright in the beginning I guess, turned in to kind of a dick.”

“oh yeah how so?”

“I mean he did sleep with Audrey even though he knew Jen was in to him, kind of a dick move.” I shrugged.

Jensen huffed rolling his eyes.

“I didn’t write the script.” Jensen shrugged.

“It might’ve been better if you did.” I said, giving him one last glance before starting to jog.

I jogged at a steady pace, close behind Jared and Jensen.

I was smaller then both of them, so I took smaller strides.

I have to admit I did feel at peace.

I enjoyed the gentle morning canadian breeze nipping at my cheeks.

I was taking in all the beautiful sights around me.

I liked it here.

It seemed like we weren’t jogging for long before we were stopping at a little coffee shop.

“I believe I owe you an extra large cup of coffee.” Jared said glancing at me.

“I believe you are correct.”

“I’ll be right back, you want anything J?” Jared asked turning towards Jensen.

“nah man I’m alright.”

Jared nodded at us before disappearing inside the coffee shop.

It was silent as I stared at the quiet street, the town not quite awake yet.

“did you really hate CJ?” Jensen spoke making me glance at him.

“I think hate is a strong word, more thoroughly disliked him.” I laughed.

Jensen furrowed his eyebrows as I chuckled.

Was this bothering him?

“I like the guy who plays him better.” I spoke, not thinking about how it sounded.

I felt my cheeks heat up as I realized what I just said.

“oh well good.” Jensen responded, rubbing his neck nervously.

I was about to respond when Jensen grabbed my arm pulling me to his chest.

“Careful!” he shrieked as the coffee shop door flung open, almost smacking me in the face.

I swallowed nervously as he stared down at me, our bodies pressed together.

It felt even better than I had imagined.

“thanks for that.” I whispered tearing my eyes away from his.

I felt as if my heart would jump out of my chest at any moment from how fast it was beating.

I could feel his eyes lingering on me.

Jensen carefully tucked a piece of hair behind my ear that had fallen from my ponytail.

I shivered at his touch, feeling as if my body was suddenly engulfed in flames.

It felt good to be touched by him.

It felt heavenly.

I quickly jumped away from him, hearing Jared’s voice reappearing.

“what’s going on?” Jared asked looking between me and Jensen.

“uh baby moose is as clumsy as you say.” Jensen smirked, causing Jared to laugh.

I rolled my eyes taking my coffee from Jared.

I walked back to the condo as Jensen and Jared jogged ahead.

I was taking time to sip my coffee.

I was taking time to control my racing heart.

what in the world happened back there?

I had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.

Ouch.

Okay that hurt.

and I’m not dreaming.

I bit my lip trying to fight the smile that made it’s way to my face.

I have no idea what that was.

but I liked it.

I liked it a lot.

I made it back to the condo, being informed that the boys had to go to the studio to shoot more promos for the new season, and that they’d be back to get me for the party tonight. I gave them a wave, crashing on to the couch from exhaustion.

I remember now why I don’t run at five in the morning.

I grabbed a blanket off the couch, curling up to catch a few more hours of sleep.

I woke up around noon, sleeping later than I would’ve liked.

I got up making myself some breakfast.

I passed the time watching more Dawson’s Creek.

It wasn’t like I had anything else to do.

It was starting to get later, I needed to get ready for this party.

I grabbed a simple mini dress throwing it on.

I glanced at my reflection in the mirror.

I didn’t completely hate what I saw.

I didn’t love it either.

I wasn’t anything exceptional.

It was no wonder I was so invisible.

I heard the boys come back home, stomping up the stairs like a herd of elephants.

I put a light coat of makeup on, before brushing through my hair.

I heard my door opening, making me glance over.

Jared stood there in a button up and some jeans.

“you look beautiful.” Jared smiled.

“thanks moose, you look, well very moose like.” I laughed as Jared gave me an annoyed look.

“come on brat, it’s time to go.” Jared said rolling his eyes.

I grabbed my purse, following him down the stairs. Jensen stood there waiting, wearing an outfit similar to Jared’s.

He looked handsome.

He looked flawless.

I could feel his eyes linger on me as I descended the staircase.

“ready to go?” Jensen asked looking at me and Jared.

I nodded my head nervously.

I didn’t like parties.

I would suffer through this one for Jared.

and maybe a little bit to be with Jensen.

I played with the hem of my dress as Jensen drove. It was a silent car ride, nobody bothering to make conversation.

I sighed as Jensen pulled up to the studio.

I hesitantly got out, already overwhelmed with the number of cars in the parking lot.

I could feel the nerves taking over my body making it shake slightly.

I felt a hand on my shoulder making me relax a little.

“it’s going to be okay, just stick with me.” Jared said offering a smile.

I gave him a forced one, following him and Jensen inside.

Jensen disappeared immediately when we got in, going to hug various cast and crew members.

I have to admit I got a little jealous watching him hug multiple women.

It wasn’t like I had a right to be.

Jensen looked right through me.

I just had to accept that.

“I want you to meet Jim.” Jared said grabbing my hand and pulling me to an older gentleman.

I made sure to act super polite as I met various cast and crew members that I hadn’t met the first season.

I felt like Jared’s shadow as he made his way around the room. I didn’t know anyone really except for Jensen and Jeffery Dean Morgan.

I had already talked to Jeff for a little so now I had nothing else to do except following Jared around like a lost puppy dog.

It was exhausting listening to conversations I didn’t really care about.

I needed some air.

I quietly slipped out the door, not that anyone would notice I was gone.

Jared was too busy basking in the limelight.

I was happy for him, don’t get me wrong, it’s just hard to be in his shadow sometimes.

I sighed looking around the studio parking lot. A bunch of trailers sat on the lot, with names of cast members etched on the doors. I found the one that said Jared Padalecki, and took a seat on the steps.

It was a beautiful night out.

It was quiet.

I took a deep breath blowing it out of my nose in a huff.

“you know the parties inside right?”

I jumped as Jensen’s voice took me by surprise.

“geez Jensen I never noticed how observant you were.” I joked rolling my eyes at him.

“not a fan of parties huh?”

“uh not really, they were always sort of Jared’s thing.” I answered with a shrug.

“yeah they��re not so much my thing either, too many people.” Jensen said.

I nodded my head, an awkward silence falling between us.

“uh do you want to see my trailer?” Jensen asked.

I felt the all too familiar heat creep up my spine.

“uh okay.” I whispered, flushed.

Jensen extended his hand pulling me to my feet.

It turns out his trailer was right beside Jared’s. He opened the door allowing me to step in.

It had his wardrobe for Dean in it, a small couch, a mini fridge, and a bathroom. I let my fingers graze over his costumes, observing a few articles closely.

“It’s nice.” I smiled plopping on the couch.

It was rather comfy for a small sofa.

“perks of being like a major celebrity.” Jensen smirked, quoting me from yesterday.

Jensen sat down beside me, our bodies just inches from each other due to the small size of the sofa.

“I’m uh glad you’re here baby moose, Jared’s a lot happier when you are.” Jensen said giving me a smile.

“I’m glad I’m here too.”

It was quiet, another awkward silence falling between us.

“we should probably head back inside, people are going to wonder where we are.” Jensen said standing up.

I stood up too.

“wondering where you are maybe, in case you haven’t noticed I’m pretty good at being invisible.” I said with a slight frown.

“well I can see you.”

Author Note:

I hope you enjoyed part one of this mini series! Please give a heart, reblog, comment or follow if you want more! I appreciate it!

Part (II)

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles imagine #jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles x female!reader #jensen x reader #dean winchester #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #jensen ackles fanfiction #jensen and jared #jared padalecki #jared x sister reader #jared and jensen #jensen ackles preference #jensen ackles smut #supernatural #spn fanfic #spn cast

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