#hat no jutsu

[detectivestucks]

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18+ content, Minors do NOT interact

Pairing: Yandere Tobi/Obito x F!Reader

Summery: Obito found you paying your respects to his memorial and an obsession with his first love's best friend blossoms. Soon he finds that he will do anything and everything to protect you, his delicate peach.

Warnings: Stalking, Violence, Kidnapping, Fingering, Nipple play, Unprotected Penetration, Virgin Reader, implied threat of suicide.

Word Count: 9.7k

Author's note: Yes, I know the timeline is a bit altered, it was a creative decision. Deal with it. :)

Itachi and Kisame remove their hats as they return to the hideout looking slightly worn out, presumably from battle. They had just finished scoping out the Leaf in search of the nine tails jinchuriki and Itachi’s little brother, Sasuke.

“Did everything go okay?” Pain asked

“Yes, we ran into my former captain.”

“Itachi had it covered but the copy ninja's annoying boyfriend started attacking and then some shinobi we couldn’t see sent shockwaves into the ground that sparked a small tsunami.”

“It was at that point we thought it best to retreat. We know the jinchuriki is still located inside the village. There was no need for further engagement.”

Obito felt his chest constrict. Shockwaves...he knew that jutsu. That was the trademark of Rin’s best friend. That was a jutsu unique to you. But you had left the village a long time ago. When had you come back? 

Itachi being the only one among them who knew Tobi’s identity, quickly noticed the shift in Obito’s stance. The rest of the group, completely oblivious to the insignificant comic relief, did not notice as Obito exited the room and hurried towards the village. 

Rather than scouring the Leaf hunting for you, he waited at the one spot he knew you’d come, the memorial yard. Sure enough it only took one evening to catch you bringing lilies to your best friend’s grave. Obito cried with you as you shed tears for your friend but then you did something he didn’t expect, you stopped at the memorial stone to pay your respects to him. 

“Obito, I wish you knew how much I cared for you. You didn’t deserve what you got. You were too good for this world.” You dragged your fingertips along his name, tears streaming down your cheeks as you remembered the boy you loved as a child.

You…cared for him? He was… too good?

Obito felt a pang in his chest. You were just like her. So kind and sweet. Always seeing the best in people. Even poor retches like him. He wanted to thank you but he didn’t want to scare you.  Instead he let curiosity get the better of him and followed you home. He watched you through the window as you did your nighttime routine. Seeing you at peace alone in your home brought him contentment. He  snuck up to the window’s sill to catch a closer view as you got into bed and drifted to sleep. It brought him comfort to see you rest and he took that comfort with him as he finally returned to the hideout.

The next day, plans for tracking the other tailed beasts including the three tails had Obito feeling emotional. Itachi caught how stiff ‘Tobi’ stood during the conversation and soon after caught him leaving the hideout to go see you. He found you at the training grounds running drills with Kakashi’s team.

“Y/N-sensei, I wanna learn a new jutsu!”

“Now Naruto, I am under direct orders from Kakashi to work on chakra control drills with you three. A new jutsu will be no good if you don’t have a way to command the chakra to execute it.”

“When will Kakashi-sensei be better?”

“He’ll be better soon Sakura, don’t you worry.”

Obito sat in the trees watching you for a few hours until the jinchuriki kid was done pestering you. He was such a nuisance but you didn’t lose your patience even a little. The same could not be said about his teammates which seemed to only bring you amusement. When you were done you walked over to the memorial stone and gave your gratitude to your fallen comrades before heading home. 

You were so much like her. Beautiful and sweet as a peach. The way you cared for and nurtured others, it took a hold of his heart. He could watch you all day and never get bored. You were his light in the darkness of the Akatsuki. 

The next day he went out with his partner on their mission. While Deidara requested alone time so he didn’t need to suffer Tobi’s presence, Obito used kamui to visit you. Carefully watching from a distance till you fall asleep. Just like he did every time he visits you. Following the same ritual as before. He’d enter your home and play with your hair, stroking it as you slept. Some nights he would lay with you and breathe in your scent while you were none the wiser. It was in these moments that he knew he needed to protect you. His delicate little peach. No one in this cruel world would bruise you. He would make sure of it.

One evening while you were paying your respects to your friends, a jonin he didn’t recognize approached you. The man brushed your hip and backside and you pulled away as he asked you on a date. The audacity of the man to think of romance while you were mourning your lost comrades. You had told him no and he left but something told Obito it wasn’t over. This was clearly a man who needed to be stopped. 

The next day the man came to you again and held your hips while he asked to take you on a date, a little more forcefully than before. You had declined his request once more and politely pushed his hands off of you before turning to walk away. He had called out to you but before he could say anything further Obito had dragged the man into his void. The shinobi looked around bewildered. Obito growled at him from behind his mask.

“The lady said no” 

“Where the fuck am I?!”  

“A place no one can hear you scream so don’t give me a reason to bring you back here.” If the man could see Obito’s face behind the mask he surely would’ve wet himself. But instead in a facade of bravery he hurls insults at Obito

“A fuckin coward relies on tricks. Be a man and show me your face.”

“My face is none of your business, as for tricks, I have none, just superior prowess.” Obito makes his voice thick and deep, tapping into Madara’s tone of intimidation. “If I see you bother her again it will be the last time you speak.”

His facade is broken and his throat bobs as he swallows his pride. “Fine, no pussy’s worth a fuckin death threat.”

“Good, now that we understand each other, you may go.”

Obito materializes the man back in the village while he teleports himself over to the tree outside of your home. He spots you walk up to your door and head inside. He yearned to be the one greeting you, welcoming you home,  rather than outside in a tree. You should come home to his loving face, not a room of darkness. 

Instead he waits till you are sound asleep to touch your hips where the other man had touched them. He replaced the man’s predatory touch with his loving one. You rolled into him, your subconscious nestling into his presence. He held you, almost falling asleep from your intoxicating pheromones as they lull him into a state of bliss. When he was sure you wouldn’t wake, he slipped his body out of your bed, replacing himself with a pillow as you searched for his comfort. 

His thumb brushed over your forehead before he disappeared from your home. His beautiful peach ripe for the picking.

While masquerading around as Tobi, Obito couldn’t help but feel lonely and isolated. His thoughts of you began to consume his mind. Every opportunity he had to visit you, he took. He had disappeared so often that the Akatsuki almost forgot about him, not that they were complaining about taking a break from his annoying persona. 

He noticed that you and Kakashi had become close. You were always assisting with his young team and visiting the cemetery together. Obito didn’t like this one bit. Kakashi would pluck his sweet peach from him. But he had to remind himself that Kakashi did keep you safe when you joined his team on missions. He took care of you when Obito could not. Though that didn’t dull his need to claim you, take you as his own. The feeling was intensifying, swelling every day. 

He found himself hunting down every man who so much as looked at you. Kakashi was the only man who’s affection he let slide…even though he was the one who made him the most angry. Maybe it was his sentiment for his old friend. Maybe it was his fear of Kakashi’s skill. Either way, he let him be, not wanting to catch the copy ninja’s attention. 

The remaining miscreants were hunted without mercy. Sometimes he couldn’t help the bloodshed that was inevitable. He was unable to restrain himself, when it came to his peach, there was no limit to what he would do to keep you safe. If they showed no remorse for their predatory stares and their greedy thoughts he would gladly hear them scream before stopping their hearts. A trail of blood secretly followed you but it was all in your delicate name.

He kept tabs on everything you did, especially when it came to your missions. He had to ensure your safety. Recently learning some of the details of one of your upcoming missions, he knew he’d have to keep special watch over you. It was a dangerous mission with Hidden Mist shinobi that had been under consideration to join his troupe. He couldn’t risk history repeating itself and no longer cared if Deidara or Itachi figured out what he had been doing with his spare time. Even though you would be joining Kakashi on this mission, it wasn’t a guarantee of your safety. He already knew that too well and he must protect his sweet peach at all costs.

He stalks your group as you travel through the woods, earning him a side eye from Kakashi who knew something was up but couldn’t quite pin his finger on who the lurker was. You asked him what was wrong but Kakashi refused to say anything, not wanting to tip off a watching Obito that he knew they were being followed. 

Nice try Bakashi, but I already know your tricks.

Soon you came across your target. As predicted they put up quite a fight. You and Kakashi made a remarkable team fending them off. Your mission was to capture them for intel but the confrontation with the targets escalated to the point that elimination was deemed necessary. Obito was impressed by your strength. You took on three of them at once, knocking them down with your earth style shockwave. You manipulated the magnitude, where the earth would fracture, where it would cave in, and even where it would snap up. It was an impressive jutsu but it was not foolproof. He watched you closely, ready to intervene if it ever became too much. He watched you so closely that he hadn’t noticed the back up Mist shinobi that had been summoned. Kunai thrown from the trees flew at you as you went to weave more hand signs. You lept out of the way but still one caught your leg and the other grazed your thigh.

No.

Before Obito could even breathe he was in front of you, mangekyou in place, murder in the front of his mind. His stance was so protective, you didn’t doubt whose side this unknown stranger was on for a second. You simply pulled the kunai out of your leg allowing the blood to flow freely before going on the defensive. 

When a second wave of backup came, you did what you could but you were overwhelmed. Kakashi and his team could not keep up with the stampede of attacks. The fear for your safety caused Obito to snap. He went on a homicidal rampage, annihilating the entire group with gruesome bloodshed, bringing both yourself and Kakashi to a halt. 

In your stunned transe you didn’t catch the shinobi who snuck past your blind spot and stabbed you in the chest. When Obito turns to slice down the man he sees you clutching the kunai. In the span of a single heartbeat he dropped his weapon and pulled you into his void, bending over you in a state of panic. 

He stole your body from the battlefield so quickly Kakashi almost missed it. Kakashi finished off the last of the Mist shinobi, making certain that the life of the man who attacked you would drain by his hand. He stood up in alarm asking Naruto and Sakura if they saw who the man was that took you away. Neither of them did and Kakashi instructed them to search the nearby area for you.

Obito’s hands shook over you as he went to remove the knife, holding pressure where it once had pricked you like a pincushion. You had no idea where you were or who this man was. You had just watched him slaughter nearly twenty men to protect you immediately before his abduction. You would have been terrified if you didn’t have a more pressing issue to tend to.

“My peach, how do I help?” 

In your state of confusion you thought you misheard him. He must have you confused with someone else. You feel your consciousness begin to slip as you speak.

“Do you know…medical…ninjutsu?” it came out as a whisper.

“No” he whined

“Need…Sakura.”

“I can do that.” 

Obito goes back to the scene of his crime. Bodies strewn all over the field. He felt accomplished to see them sprawled out and covered in red.

“Hey you, girl”

“Me?! What did you do with Y/N-sensei?!”

“She’s safe. You know medical ninjutsu?”

“Yeah”

“Meet me over there.” 

She looked at the masked Obito with severe skepticism. He nodded at her and walked away, swirling out of sight as he did, stepping into his void to retrieve you. 

He lifted you up, supporting under your shoulders and knees. He held you close, his entire body tense with worry but somehow gentle. He felt so warm as you were growing cold from your wounds. Despite the horrors you saw him commit, you laid your head against his chest as he carried you back outside to a sheltered spot behind a few trees and a bush where Sakura was waiting.

He laid you down and instructed Sakura to do what she had to while he eagerly watched. Sakura gave him sideways glances many times when she felt she could afford to risk the distraction. Who was this terrifying murderer? Why did he have a fixation with you? After twenty minutes Sakura lowered her hands, panting from the amount of chakra used.

“There.”

“She’s healed?”

She nods, “She’s healed. The major damage at least.”

“Thank you”

He scoops up your body and retreats back to his void as Skaura shouts at your disappearing figures. 

You were out cold, resting for nearly a day when you woke up in a makeshift bed in a dark endless room filled with large gray blocks. 

“Where am I?”

You scan your surroundings but it hurts too much to move. The mysterious masked man suddenly appears in the room causing you to jump, quickly followed by you grabbing your chest in pain. 

“Careful Peach” he says as he rushes to your side, falling on his knees beside you.

“Why do you keep calling me that?” you inquire with eyes screwed shut in pain.

“Because you are my delicate Peach. I need to take care of you.”

“I’ve been taking care of myself just fine, thank you.” you say through clenched teeth, feeling the pain radiate over your entire chest. This man was clearly insane. Despite how he took care of you, you knew you were in danger.

“I wouldn’t call your current condition ‘just fine’, Peach.”

He feels your forehead, looking for signs of fever.

“Just who are you anyways?”

“It doesn’t matter. All that matters is you’re okay.”

“It does matter. And I need to go back to my team, let them know I’m okay.”

“The girl knows you’re okay, she’ll tell them.”

“Yes, but I need to get back to them. I need to-”

“No.”

“Excuse me?” Disbelief filled you, yet the earlier bells of warning were officially verified.

He looks at you and shakes his head. “No.”

You look at him stunned, fear swelling. You look around the dark empty space starting to wonder where the exit was.

“You’re not going back. They can’t protect you. I know that now. You will stay with me. Here.”

Stunned into silence you look up at him. You open your mouth and close it a few times before you finally say to him, “You can’t keep me here.”

“I can and I will.”

Obito watches as terrified anger blossoms on your face. You stand up in spite of the pain, searching for an exit. Glancing over your shoulder at him as you move further and further away, frantically peering behind every gray pillar and block.

“You won’t be able to leave on your own.” he calls to you. “Only I can teleport you in and out of here.”

“And where is here?” You say, walking back towards him with a guise of bravery.

“My void”

Your jaw fell open. “Your what?”

“My void. Only I have access to it using Kamui.”

Comprehension made your eyes flood with tears. You were trapped. A madman who just slaughtered a fleet of shinobi to save you has trapped you in another dimension to ‘keep you safe.’ You looked up at him pleading, “I want to go home. Let me go home.”

“I can’t…it’s not safe.”

“But my home, my friends, the village…”

“They will be fine without you.”

Starting to realize he was serious, you begin to plead. “At least let me tell them where I have gone. That way they don’t come looking for me. Let me say goodbye.”

“Peach, I can’t risk you running away. I can’t risk you getting hurt.” He reaches out to pet your hair and you shy away from his touch.

The tears leak down your cheeks, feeling helpless. You walk away and sit down, turning away from the masked man, hugging your knees to your chest and resting your head against the tops of your knee caps.

Obito, feeling pain at seeing you so sad walks up and puts a hand on your shoulder, “It has to be this way Peach, I’m sorry.”

He leaves you alone to sulk. You would be fine. You would grow to accept things the way that they are. You would grow to love him in spite of how it started. It was all going to be okay.

When he left in a swirl you wept. You allowed your mind to panic and wander to all the terrifying possibilities. What was he going to do with you? Why was he obsessed with you? How were you going to get out of this? 

The more your mind reeled the quieter your tears became. Eventually you collapsed back onto the ashen floor. As you lay there, staring up at the black ceiling of his void, exhaustion and sadness ebb you to sleep. 

You wake up the next day to find a large chunk of your stuff from your home was suddenly in the void. He had made the effort to move your belongings to you, even bringing many of your most cherished items such as your favorite clothes, your favorite mug, the blanket you sleep with every night, and your photos of Obito and Rin. 

How did this man know these would be the items you’d want most? How long had he been following you? You felt a shiver roll down your spine.

What you presume to be hours later, the masked man returns to check on you. He’s more timid than he was before. Approaching you carefully. 

“Thank you” you say, looking at the floor, “for bringing me some of my stuff. I’m still pissed, and I’m not staying here, but I appreciate the effort.” You were terrified but you didn’t want him to know that. You were going to find a way out of this. You just had to figure out how to get out of this damned dimension first.

If only you could see the smile below his mask. Overwhelmed by how cute you are he pulls you into a hug. You’re stiff with terror but you feel his strong torso pushed up against your own and you can’t help the little part of you that is left breathless. It feels familiar and warm but you can’t place why.

“I love you Peach.” he says as he holds you in his arms, laying his head on top of your head. He was insane. You reply to him with a shaking voice,

“If you loved me you’d give me some windows instead of dreary slate abyss. I can’t even tell what time of day it is.”

“Sorry, voids don’t work that way, Peach.”

“Sorry, I guess being abducted is new to me.” you forced the sass into your tone. You were petrified but you needed a way out of here. You figured maybe you could manipulate his affection for you.

Obito winces at the word abduction. He prefers to think of it as protection

“What? You didn’t think I’d be okay with this, did you? That is the title of what this is.” You weren’t sure where this bravery came from but he was buying it.

“At least I’m not trying to poison you against your own clan, or acting as the architect to kill your childhood crush.” he said with a venom that made you believe he was speaking from experience but you were too focused on your own situation to care. Your false bravery turned into false anger.

“Sorry to steal the opportunity away from you but I don’t have much in the way of a clan and my childhood crush is already dead.”

His face snapped and locked onto yours. “What did you say?”

“I’m not repeating myself, I know you heard me the first time.”

You watched as his throat bobbed beneath his black mask. Why did that impact him so much? Who was this guy anyways? He acted like he had known you your whole life yet you only know him as a mask and tuft of hair.

“Who are you?”

He turned and walked away from you, “Someone long dead to you”

Well that didn’t answer any questions. If anything it brought up more.

“Well if you won’t tell me who you are, then tell me what to call you.”

“Currently the world knows me as Tobi.”’

“Do you want me to call you Tobi then?”

“No…”

“Then what do I call you?”

He paused. “I guess Tobi is fine.”

“Okay, well Tobi, I want to go home. I am not spending my life tucked inside this vault.”

“That’s out of the question.”

You inhale deeply. Acting skills front and center. “Then I guess my safety isn’t guaranteed.”

He glanced over, tilting his head, giving you a questioning look.

“Your top priority is my safety. I can think of a lot of ways to make myself unsafe all alone here in this little void of yours,” You taunt him with your words as your eyes dart around the room.

His blood boiled over. Were you really suggesting what he thought you were? And over some dumb sunlight?! His hands twitched by his side.

“Tobi, if you intend for this” you say pointing around the void, “to be the rest of my life, it will be a short one because I’m not doing it.” you cross your arms. Of course you weren’t actually suicidal but you were going to say anything to better your circumstances. He may be your psychotic captor but he seemed to have a weakness for your well being and you were going to pull at that thread till he unraveled.

He heaved a heavy sigh before grumbling. “Give me a day to figure it out.”

“And how will I know if it's been a day?! I can’t tell time without the sun or so much as a frickin watch!”

The theatrics were working. 

“I’m sorry Peach, I’ll be back.”

He fled from the void with his tail between his legs. You let out a huge breath. How you were able to pull that stunt off was beyond you. Desperation breeds its own strength. You hoped with all your might when he came back it was to get you out of his little dimension. 

You waited, having absolutely nothing to do. No books, no games, no radio, no food, no beverage…nothing. 

You mind tortured you with thoughts. You wondered how everyone was back home, rejecting the demons of your subconscious telling you that you may never see them again. 

I will find a way out of this. 

You strolled around checking out what was behind all the gray boxes. Surprise, it was more gray boxes. You climbed each one, beginning to count them as you went. You were usually a very ambitious person but there was nothing to do. You began playing with your jutsu to see if it would work in a void. Update: it does. You brought an entire kilometer to rubble just for fun and treaded up the path you created to get some exercise. Then you jumped block to block, back to your little makeshift bedroom waiting for Tobi. Eventually you got tired so you made yourself ready for bed hoping that when you woke up he would be back with updated living arrangements.

*******************************************************

You turn over as you stir and nuzzle into a hand that is softly petting your hair. 

“Good Morning Peach”

You stiffen before your eyes dart up to his. Mask of bravery back in place, you greet him. “Good morning Tobi.” He winces. He hates how the false moniker sounds coming from your mouth. 

“I see you started destroying my void.”

“I was bored so I decided to train.”

A hearty chuckle left his throat. “I made arrangements but please understand I will not sound or behave like myself where we are going.”

“And why is that?”

“You will see eventually.”

“Oh boy, so glad you enlightened me.” you lay the sarcasm thick and it only makes him laugh more. Good, he finds you charming. You can work with this.

“I also want to warn you, we will be among rogue shinobi.”

“So your idea of keeping me safe is to have me live with the very people that I’ve been hunting. The very same people who want to kill me and my friends?”

“Yes, If you are among us, no one will bother you. If you remained in the village, you would be subject to their…missions.”

“Seems like stupid logic if you ask me.”

“Please trust me.”

“I don’t, but I don’t have a choice either.”

“At least you’re not dumb”

“Did you think I was?”

“Not even for a second.”

He grabbed your hand with his strong possessive one. Something about the way your palm fit in his felt right. You weren’t sure why but that was the signal your brain sent your hand when you gripped it tighter. A psychopath whose hand you were holding. Great, you’ve completely lost your marbles a mere three days into captivity.

Next thing you knew you could smell the air of the earth again, you could see the shadows left by the sun, happiness washed over you in a visible way and Tobi’s fingers slid between yours upon seeing your reaction. He pulled you into another hug, he seems to always be hugging you. It’s like he’s forcing you to get used to him. “I will be this person when we are alone. I will be another when the others are around. You understand?”

You nod your head worried about what he could possibly mean? What kind of a monster is he around this gang of thugs that he needs to warn you?

He removes his hand from yours and places it between your shoulder blades pushing you towards a cavern. A man with orange hair, purple eyes and many piercings looks you up and down as you enter. 

“Tobi, this is her?”

“Yes Pain! This is the hostage I spoke about!” His voice was comically high pitched and he sounded like a child. You tried your hardest not to react but it was just so different from what you were expecting. 

“Put her in the dungeon.”

“Well sir, remember I requested she stay in my room, sir?!”

“Yes but she’s a hostage, who will stop her from escaping?”

“Do you really think she’s dumb enough to try and leave the hideout of the Akatsuki?”

Your face went pale as you realized just who you had been dealing with this whole time. They were supposed to wear black cloaks with red clouds. You hadn’t seen Tobi wear his once! Always dressed in all black with sandles. But your reaction built a convincing case. The man named Pain accepted your fear as enough of a restraint. He didn’t question why it would be Tobi’s room but some blonde man eyed you hungirly and told Pain Tobi was probably keeping you in his room to finally lose his virginity. 

Once behind his door, he modulated his voice back to normal.

“What the hell was that?” you asked more honestly than you intended.

“What? You’ve never seen an act before?”

“Well of course. But why do you make yourself seem like a fool?”

“So no one will suspect.”

“Suspect what?”

“Don’t worry about it. Here.” Tobi swirls you back into his void and he starts gathering your things. After a second you begin to copy him and he brings you both back to his room in the Akatsuki hideout. You start to find nooks and crannies to store your things leaving only one remaining item in your hands. He watches you as you look down on your photos of your friends. Eyes lingering over the one of you and Obito before you tuck them away with mist in your eyes. 

“Are you okay?”

“No, but…thank you…for bringing the photos. I don’t know how you knew but I appreciate it.”

Tobi pulled you into another hug. You were unsure why he cared so much and why you kept letting him hug you. Maybe it was cause compared to your new roommates he suddenly seems less scary. To his credit this hug felt nice. Plus, since it seems like he was going to be your only companion for a while, you decided to tolerate it. 

He unfurled the hug and began tugging at your shirt. Lifting the hem above your neck, exposing your bare breasts.

“Hey!”

He disregarded your complaint and touched where your stab wound had been. “How does it feel?”

“It’s fine.” You say blushing while you cover your bosom. “May you please let go of my shirt now?”

“Huh? Oh, of course. Sorry Peach.” He drops your shirt and backs away swiftly almost as if he was embarrassed. He seemed a little more humane today so you decided to press your luck and scout out your surroundings.

“Can we go outside? I’d appreciate some sun and maybe some real food”

He gives you a piercing stare out of the eye hole of his mask.  “Stay by my side. I know you are strong but however strong you think you are, I am stronger.”

You gulp remembering the massacre you witnessed three days ago.

“I will be your protector. No one will hurt you ever again.” he lifted your chin so you’d look up at his eye through the swirling mask. “I promise.”

“I believe you…”

You see his eye crease when you speak. He was happy. That’s good. Keep him happy and it will give you openings to escape…though you weren’t sure outrunning him would be possible given his tricky teleportation ability.

You spend the afternoon with him, gathering intel and acting flirty, playing along with his advances. When he grabbed your hand, you laced your fingers. When he reached for your hip, you reached for his. When he hugged you, you draped your arms around his neck. You play into his affection for you, keeping him happy, earning his trust and lowering his guard. If I keep this up, captivity will be bearable. But you also feared that if you acted a little too well, you may fall for your own lies. Holding him today felt too easy given your desperate situation. Was it a genjutsu perhaps?

Nighttime came and instead of parading you past the other members of the Akatsuki who were home between missions, he teleported you both straight to his chambers. You get ready for bed and realize you do not have a bed of your own. It was still in the void. Would he send you to spend the nights in the void? He cleared his throat, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“I would feel safest if you shared the bed with me.” he said looking down. “You can sleep on the opposite side of the bed if you would like but I don’t want an enemy who finds the hideout to get to you before I wake.” 

You swallow nervously. You know he loves you. That much is obvious but you are searching for signs that he might try to take advantage of you while you’re unconscious. You think back to earlier when he was checking your wound. He didn’t seem to register that he had exposed your breasts for his pleasure. It was almost like your anatomy was irrelevant, only your well being consumed his thoughts. You chose to believe he will be respectful and so you agree.

“Pick whichever side you want. I’ll be back when I’m done.” He grabs a fresh pair of pants and heads to the bathroom. When the door is snapped shut you stand there looking at the bed. You’ve never chosen a side of the bed before. You’ve never been in a situation where you had to. You paced around the mattress like it was the most daunting choice you ever had to make. It’s not like this was a long term decision. You’d escape or convince him to let you go soon enough. So why were you weighing your options so carefully? 

Eventually you decide to choose the side closest to the window and give him the side closest to the door. You were much more afraid of his fellow gang members coming in with less than pure intentions than you were of outside shinobi coming for the blood of the Akatsuki. 

Just as you finally slip between the sheets, Tobi comes out of the bathroom with only a pair of black stretch sweatpants on. Your eyes drink up his figure. His body was half white as if made up of false materials but it moved like it was his real body. He was extremely toned, swollen pecs and chiseled abs cut across his upper body causing a little drool to pool in the corner of your mouth. Most surprisingly, he also took off his mask and below you saw battle torn skin that etched across the right side of a face that was intimidating, yet soft and familiar. His eyes catch you staring and he quickly looks down removing some of the intimidation you felt. 

He scratches the back of his neck. “I haven’t shown my face to anyone in years. I’m sorry if it scares you. I just can’t always sleep in the mask.”

“No, it’s fine” you say in a hoarse voice. Your throat had suddenly gone dry. “It’s not scary.” 

It wasn’t but what did scare you was the thoughts of what epic battle had mangled him to this degree only for him to survive and still be as strong as he is. You suddenly wondered if he was invincible and if escape would ever be possible. 

He took his position on the vacant side of the bed, smiling that you left him by the door. He knew exactly why you chose the side you did. He turned to face you from under the covers. 

“Goodnight Peach.”

“Goodnight Tobi.”

You see him wince as you say his name. You knew he wasn’t lying when he said he didn’t want you calling him by that name. He turns over and extinguishes the candle letting darkness blanket the room as you drift to sleep with surprising ease. Your body’s alarm, shockingly low given your current residence.

*******************************************************

Sunlight seeps into the room as Obito wakes up. He suddenly realizes how warm he is and it only took a few more blinks of his groggy eyes to realize why. You had traveled over to his side of the bed last night and latched onto him. He smiled, feeling his chest fill with joy. He petted your hair. You were his. You didn’t know it yet, but you were. In a few short days not only were you almost completely healed from your recent battle but you were falling for him too. Hugging him, holding his hand, cuddling in bed, Obito had never experienced human touch like this before but he was sure it didn’t always feel this right. 

He tries waking you but is met with grumpy groans and you bury yourself deeper into his chest. He kisses the top of your head as your little fists cling to him tight. He gave up on trying to wake you and let you ride out your sleep, enjoying the cuddles that were sure to cease as soon as you came to. 

Sure enough, nearly an hour later he hears you sharply inhale as you withdraw from him. You quickly sit up and face the window as he casually stretches and gets up. 

“Good Morning” he yawns feeling smug and powerful

“Morning” you say as you adjust your messy bun, trying to seem casual as you hide your embarrassment that you were needily cuddling with your kidnapper. 

You both get ready for the day, you donning a set of tactical clothes for no reason other than it was what you were used to and him, his mask and Akatsuki gear, no longer hiding the cloak now that you knew his occupation. He grabs your hip and teleports you to a tea shop for breakfast. 

You live out a week in this manner. Spending all your free time together. Occasionally having run-ins with the other Akatsuki members. They eye you in a bone chilling way. You are certain they are calculating how to enter into your room without awakening Tobi. They are nothing but disrespectful towards him, but he gives as good as he gets. You especially have to hone your acting skills to not laugh when Tobi says something ignorant and rude in his comedic tone, earning the anger of who you now know is his partner Deidara. 

One thing that bothers you the most is the ever watchful eyes of the mass murderer Itachi Uchiha. He is always polite and quiet and would seemingly be the nicest of the members if not for his reputation for slaughtering his entire clan. It’s always the quiet ones. You didn’t like how he would stare at you. After your last run in with him and Kisame, you were sure they were looking for retribution. You decide to bring this up to Tobi as he gets in bed. 

“Tobi,” he winces “I know you said I’d be safe here among the other members but I recently fought against Itachi and Kisame. I don’t like how the Uchiha looks at me. I feel like he’s looking for payback.”

“He’s not.”

You were annoyed at how quickly his dismissed you. His concern for your safety was then entire reason for your current predicament.

“How do you know that?”

“Cause I know him.”

“So you should know what he did.”

“I do.”

“And you trust him?”

“With my life.”

“How can you say that? He doesn’t even know your true identity?” 

You are gobsmacked by the wild claim Tobi is making. He killed his entire bloodline and Tobi was okay with that. It was moments like this that reminded you that Tobi was a murderer, not the lovable goof that he had been masquerading around as. 

“Itachi is the only person walking this earth who knows my true identity.”

Your jaw drops open. 

“But you said that no one had seen your face…”

“It’s true, he does not know my face but he knows my identity.” You were at a loss. “One day I will enlighten you on the events of that night but know this, of every person here, Itachi is the one you can trust the most to keep you safe. If anything happens to me, he is entrusted with your safety.”

The thought terrified you. He was out of his mind. You saw what Itachi did to Kakashi first hand. You saw the morning after the Uchiha massacre. He was not to be trusted. “Tobi, no…”

His nose twitches and that was the last straw. “Well if you hate the name Tobi so much then why do you go by it!” your emotions had been high strung for over a week and you were snapping, boldly yelling at your captor.

“I don’t hate the name. I just hate when you say it.”

“What the fuck does that mean?!”

“Cause it feels wrong to hear you call me by something other than my name.”

“There’s just no winning with you. I can’t call you by your real name cause it’s some big secret that only a serial killer knows and oh yeah, apparently that same psychopath inherits me if you die!”

You cross your arms over your chest, huffing in frustration. You weren’t even sure why it bothered you so much. This is a temporary situation. You were kidnapped. You were going to escape. If Tobi dies then it will mean you’re finally free. You just have to find a way to sneak out of this hideout and you could finally go home.

“He’s the only one I can trust to guard you with his life.”

You roll your eyes, huffing once more before pursing your lips. “Why? I need to know, Tobi. Why?”

He looks down and shrinks in your gaze. “Because only he knows what it’s like to love as an Uchiha.”

You felt the wind knocked out of you. Was he saying what you think he is?

“You’re a…?”

“Yes.”

“But Itachi…”

“...had help.”

Your hand flys to your mouth covering it in shock. 

He finally looks up at you. “Y/N, it’s not what you think it is. I can explain.”

You feel fear chill your entire body and you see on his face how upset he is that you are more afraid of him than ever. He rushes towards you and gets on his knees begging and pleading, “please allow me to explain.”

“Your clan…you helped him murder…all those people.” you said it robotically. You begin to disassociate from the conversation, lost in thought till you circled around to the realization that no one talked about a missing body among the corpses. The only survivor was Saskue. There was no one else left unaccounted for among the names of the fallen brethren. So who was Tobi?

“Tobi, if you’re an Uchiha, then who are you?”

His face flushed to a cherry red. Despite the horrifying details he just shared, for the first time you felt you had the upper hand in your captivity. Why was he so afraid to tell you? He grabbed both your hands, rubbing his thumbs along your knuckles. 

Your eyes bore into him anxiously waiting for an answer.

“It’s me.” 

You remained silent, your stern expression waiting for clarification.

“Obito”

Your hands went limp in his hold. Every tense muscle relaxed as your heart leapt to your throat getting your hopes up. Then after a moment you began shaking and crying with anger. 

“That’s not funny, Tobi.” You growled at him in quiet rage. “Obito died over a decade ago. Kakashi and Rin saw it happen. None of us were the same after. I visit his grave every day I’m in the village. But I’m sure you knew that already, didn't you?” You were seeing red. He had been stalking you. This was all a ruse to get you to fall for him. You didn’t care for your safety at this moment, even after discovering he was a part of one of the most heinous crimes in the history of the Leaf, you were going to knock sense into this liar if it was the last thing you ever did. 

“Y/N, it’s me. It’s really me.” He grabs your photo of him and holds it by his face. “See?” 

You can’t see the resemblance cause your eyes are too full of tears. 

“Take your hands off that photo! Don’t touch it!”

“Y/N, think about it.” He pleads with you, “Kakashi has a sharingan in his left eye. My left eye is missing. Obito was crushed under a boulder on his right side. Look at my right side! It looks like this.” he gestured to the Hashirama cells, “I was rescued, Y/N. Madara found me. I survived.”

You had to admit that it made sense except for the last part. 

“Madara is dead.”

“He is now, but he wasn’t at the time. He became my master after the accident, after I healed, after Rin…”

His voice cracked at the last word. It was a sobering sound causing your anger to break.

“...Obito?”

He swallowed heavily, “Yes”

You believed him….

The wave of emotion that crashed over you knocked you to your knees. You fell to the ground sobbing. The boy you had loved all your life was before you, taking care of you, alive and well. A monster who had done horrendous things but he was alive. The realization broke your mind. Obito joined you on the floor, holding you as you cried in his arms. 

“Why did you never come back? All of us, we needed you. I-I needed you.”

“I can’t tell you that Peach. But I’m here now. I won’t leave you.” 

Your hands grabbed at him like he would disappear at any given moment. One arm wrapping around his back, the other cradling his head as you hyperventilate in his arms. 

He nuzzles into the curve of your neck as he professes, “I love you Peach.” 

You wanted to say it back but talking wasn’t an option. You were too overcome with emotion. 

He helped you up to standing and laid you down on the bed. He got in next to you and held you in his arms till your cries quieted. His large palm stroking over your back, comforting you as your mind came to grips with the fact that he was very much alive and very much in love with you the way you were in love with him. 

Occasionally as you cried, he’d kiss your cheek or your temple. Suddenly all the terrifying things you’d witnessed over the past ten days were no longer so terrifying. He stalked you cause he loved you. He murdered all those shinobi to protect you. He kidnapped you cause he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. The alarms that he been blaring in your head all turned quiet.

Your breathing began to return to normal and you pulled away to look at Obito squarely in the face, leaving no room for misinterpretation. You needed him to know your intentions. 

You grabbed both sides of his face and leaned in for a kiss. He quickly pulled you into his body as tightly as he could, squishing you into his chest, nearly breaking your ribs with want. You both inhaled deeply as your lips locked onto each other. You opened your mouth, seeking to deepen the kiss. It was your first one after all, you wanted to make it good. 

You toss your leg over his hip, grinding into him as one of his hands lowered to stroke your thigh and ass cheek. You moan into his mouth, him returning your sounds of affection into your own. The stroking of your leg became rough as his tough hands grip into the flesh of your behind. Your breathing heavy and ragged as your arousal increases. 

Eventually he falls to his back as you straddle him, hunching over to feast on his mouth while you continue to roll your hips against his pants. You were in the most heated and only kiss of your life and you were sure for Obito it was the same. His deep groans as you dry humped his boner concealed inside his sweatpants made your heart flutter with excitement. Everything that had been stolen from you as an adolescent was right beneath you, in your arms and between your legs. 

Obito released your lips to lean his head back with a particularly loud moan echoing out of him causing Deidera to pound against the wall. “Just cause I knew you were going to fuck her doesn’t mean I need to hear it you fucking virgins!”

You laugh centimeters from his face before he flips you onto the bed so he is hovering over your panting silhouette. Lashes fluttering as you salivate from the way his strong presence looms over you. 

“Obito, I…” He kisses you slow and deep, not letting you speak. You break the kiss to finish your sentence. “I love you.”

He latches onto your lips again before speaking into your mouth, “I love you too.”

You wrap both of your legs around him, lifting yourself up to rut into him when he finally leans back on his knees to rip down your pajama pants, letting your legs fall to each side, exposing your soft flesh, ready and waiting to be sullied with unholy deeds. He sinks down, positioning himself between your legs. You prop yourself up on your elbows to watch him with curious interest. 

He kisses and sucks on your inner thighs. He releases the pliable flesh with a pop and smiles at his artwork. Of course he’d leave a mark the first chance he got. You were his after all. 

He worked his way to your center, licking a stripe up your sex before latching over your little bundle of nerves. He began to suck on it as if hoping to separate it from your body. He licked the small nub gently between vicious suckling, driving you wild and causing you to squirm. Your hand shot down to rest in his hair as you furrowed your brows and tilted your hips up into his chin, soaking his face in your secretions. Desperate need consuming your body.

He came up for air and crawled back up over you to get another one of your sweet kisses, before sinking his fingers into your tight virgin cunt. You whimper into his lips. He drags his fingers in and out of you causing you to clench around them. You make small cries as you feel him attempting to stretch you, readying you for his intrusion. 

Your hand reached for him, looking to sink beneath his pants to stroke what you desired. He propped himself up on his elbow next to you while his hand reached between your legs. You slipped between his abdominals and his waistband, fingers gliding around his thick base before closing around it and stroking upwards. Obito shuddered at your touch, hips instinctively thrusting towards you. Your hand firmly set around him, stroking up and down, you twisted towards his face to continue kissing him. The sloppy exchange continuing while you worked between each other’s legs. The heat radiated off of your bodies as your lust filled every pore. You pull back, a trail of spit connecting your mouths as you speak.

“I’m ready.”

Obito withdrew his fingers as he leaned away. He sucked his fingers clean as he stood up next to the bed. He dropped his pants so that they pooled around his ankles. He stepped out of the fabric and crawled back on the bed over you. 

He gently glided his barren length over your folds, lubricating himself in your sopping wet juices. His tip lightly poked at your swollen bud causing your breath to hitch. He gives you a nod signaling he’s going in. He sinks just the tip in and your arms tighten around him in response.

“Are you okay?”

You look up into his eyes and nod. “Mhm”

He begins to push inwards. You gasp at the stretch. It was painful but soon it shifted into a pleasurable sensation.

“Are you still okay?”

You bit your lower lip as you nod in agreement. He reached down. He wanted to be the one biting your lip. Connecting his with yours once more, his tongue swirled with passion as he stroked in and out of you slowly, allowing you to turn into a puddle under him. You cry into his mouth as you feel your walls constrict around him. You had never felt anything quite like it. Every part of you was satisfied in this position. Legs wrapped around his waist, lips connected with his, sharing the air you breathed, and the feeling of him buried in you. It was love in its purest sense. 

His soft slow romantic strokes began to give way as he realized how good the friction felt. Your tight walls wrapped around him so well, squeezing him in a way he could have never even dreamt about. You were perfection itself and it was making him ravenous.

He rolled his hips into you till they slapped against your rear. You make little sounds in response to the connection. It encourages him so he continues to roll. You keep mewling with each stroke. It is an anthem to his heart and he wants to hear it played louder. He begins slamming into you. You want to take it and please him but it’s becoming too much. 

You see his eyes gloss over. He’s consumed with the unfamiliar sensation. He flips you onto your stomach. He straddles you with his knees on either side of your legs, pinning them together. He thrusts up and in as you lay down flat. He slams his palm down on your cheek and you make a small grunt upon impact. You hear him smirk.”tch” He wants to do that again. 

You grunt a second time. He sits back on his heels and pulls your perfect body up off the bed and sits you down on his erection. Back facing him, he snakes his hands around your front and under your shirt. His muscular arms lift you up and down on him as you sing out little sounds of pleasure. 

“That’s it baby. You’re doing such a good job.”

You completely exhale as he whispers praise into your ear. Your heart thundering at a wild pace as one hand grabs on top of his hand that has a bruising grip on your chest and the other reaches back to grab him behind his head. 

He bends forward to lay light kisses along your neck and into the curve of your shoulder. You were his every desire. All the dangerous things he was capable of were only out of love for you. He would murder hordes of shinobi, tame tailed beasts, and level entire cities in your honor. He would do anything to live this moment on repeat for the rest of his life. 

You twist in his arms, politely asking to look upon his face. He sits back as he lifts you off of him. You turn around on your knees and straddle his lap, facing him as he tugs at your hem, gently lifting the fabric over your head and tossing it to a dark corner of the room. 

He hunches down to taste your perky peaks. His tongue dragging along each nub before his lips close around it with a gentle suckle. Your head lulls backwards as you cry out blissfully, allowing the new sensations to overwhelm your mind. Obito rocks your body up and down along his shaft but he doesn’t think he will be able to hold out much longer. 

He gingerly lays you down on your back, propping your legs open with his arms as he leans down, pushing his chest into yours. You feel your flexibility being tested as he sinks into you and your eyes widen at how deep he went. He begins to stroke, craving the warmth of the fast friction generated by his thrusts. He allows his sack to sway into your rear, hitting it with a satisfying clap at each impact. Your face begins to twist with pleasure. Your rhythmic cries calling to him like a siren's song. 

He leans down and presses his lips into yours, allowing your moans to reverberate around the inside of his mouth. He nears his climax as you reach yours. Releasing together in loving harmony. He slowly pumps into you, draining the seed from his length into your loving walls that graciously drink it in. 

Your doting eyes never leave his face. You realize you are hopelessly bound to him. You would never escape your captivity, nor did you want to. Both of you have surrendered to the other. Your head collapses onto the pillow and he licks one last stripe up your neck before falling next to you and kissing your jaw. His strong finger tugs at your chin, turning you to him so he may continue to adorn your lips with kisses. 

Your faces would fold into each other's necks as your bodies tangled together under the covers. The man who kidnapped you, now your most valued treasure. He would possessively hold his delicate little peach every night from henceforth and you would never speak of going home ever again because now that Obito lay with you, you were home. You allow your eyes to close and your heart to go still as you fall into a deep slumber in his arms.

Home… 

Masterlist

[irisintheafterglow]

(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)🌷✨🩷🍪 Greetings Author-nim

Can I please request (⁠^⁠_⁠^⁠メ⁠)

(OPLA Zoro x You) Where Reader is an Assassin or Ninja and is a Pirate hunter, When Zoro used to be one too, they would always compete who gets the target first. Sometimes Zoro wins, sometimes reader.

So, imagine Reader's reaction when they saw Zoro with the crew.

And also, Luffy, somehow by some miracle with his own style of talk-no-jutsu managed to convince reader to join them(⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)

(⁠ ⁠˘⁠ ⁠³⁠˘⁠)⁠♥. Hope u have a great day and it's okay if u don't want to do this. I'll understand.

baby, let the games begin

wc: 2k (surprise, shawty)

cw/tags: gn!reader, swearing, canon-typical violence, mentions of drinking and alcohol, pining pining pining pining PINING

note: hi love, thank you so much for your request!! i hope you like this because i certainly love writing for this stupid himbo man

likes, reblogs, and replies are always appreciated <3

Honor be damned, you really wanted to kill him. 

“Dirty play, demon,” you huff irritatedly, scowling at the asshole who skewered your target before you could. In a single clean slash, the head is relieved of its body and unceremoniously kicked into a bag. “We both know that one was mine.”

“Better luck next time.” Asshole. Stupid, selfish, infuriatingly attractive asshole. A million different ways you could end his life flashed through your mind and, with his back turned to you, became more of a possibility the longer you sat in your disappointment. The dock creaks beneath his receding footsteps and you spit a curse under your breath. The head now bouncing around in the pirate hunter’s hand would have had you living comfortably for months, not to mention buying some shelter for the stray dogs wandering your home island. Monsoon season was coming and you didn’t have nearly enough space to keep all of them dry. Finding food that wasn’t old bread and horse balls was hard in itself and shelter was just another task added to the to-do list. “You’re not gonna try and take it from me?” 

“Why would I? You killed him; you get the bounty,” you reply scornfully, praying that whoever came up with the idea of hunter’s honor is torn to shreds by an octopus. “Guess it is your turn,” you concede reluctantly and take note of the blood dripping from the dirty fabric sack as he reapproaches. You’d have to clean your shoes when you were done. “I did take that guy from you in Flamingo Village, last week.” 

“The one with the big, ugly hat,” he confirms and you don’t budge when he stands right in front of you. He had pretty eyes, you’d give him that. Too bad you wanted to slam your fist into his nose. “I was mad about that one.”

“Well, you got this one. Aren’t you gonna cash ‘em in?”

“I will. I’m just curious,” he says and his expression is unreadable. It bordered on amusement and suspicion with a little bit of awe. “You could have killed me a million times since I killed the target.” Already thought that, buddy. “Why didn’t you?”

“Like I said, hunter’s honor–”

“No,” he shakes his head decidedly and you narrow your eyes. “You’ve been following this guy for four days, watching other hunters fail to bring him in. My question is, why do you need this bounty so badly, and why aren’t you willing to kill me over it?”

“Technically, that’s two questions,” you deadpan and your heart does an unwanted little stutter when he scoffs, the tiniest smile pulling at his mouth. “If you really wanna know why I need it, it’s ‘cause I need to take care of some friends back home.” It wasn’t a complete lie, but you also didn’t need the most feared hunter in the seas knowing that you needed the money to buy squeaky toys and dog beds. 

“Those friends aren’t worth killing for?”

“It’s sounding like you want me to kill you,” you fire back incredulously. “Do I need to worry about you, Zoro?” 

“Look, all I’m saying is, all other hunters would be leaping at my throat as soon as I take their kill. I just don’t understand why you won’t, especially if it’s worth four days of stalking.” 

“Maybe I like playing this little game,” you admit. It’s no secret to you that your job becomes incredibly boring at times. All the other hunters you come across take their jobs too seriously and believe that they’re purging the seas of evil. You, however, knew that the real evil was pacing around ivory towers and putting up the wanted posters. When you first met Zoro, it seemed like he didn’t take his job seriously at all. He killed like it was breathing and remained unamused at the melodramatic theatrics of flashier hunters. You ran into each other often because, besides being the only ones who survive their hunts, you were the top-earning hunters of your generation and ended up following the same pace every time. “I take a bounty; you take a bounty. I try to beat the pirate hunter at his own game; he throws a fit when I’m faster than him.”

“But, today I was faster than you,” he corrects and you stick your tongue out at him in defiance. “Who’s throwing a fit now?”

“Get out of my sight, demon,” you frown but you can’t hold it for long. It becomes a tired, melancholy smile and you start to make your way back to the town to book passage home. “Hope you enjoy all that Berry.” 

“Let me buy you a drink with it before you go,” he calls after you and you freeze where you stand. “Consolation for kicking your ass this time around.” You shoot him a scathing look over your shoulder and take the bait. 

“I did all the dirty work for you, asshole, so it better be three drinks at the least.” He chuckles softly under his breath and you roll your eyes, letting him catch up to you before heading to the nearest bar together. “I hate you so much.” 

“No, you don’t.”

As time passed and you ran into him more during your hunts, that hatred turned into something different, an annoying feeling of excitement every time you heard a sword unsheathed or spotted someone with green hair. You found yourself checking your watch when you were ahead of him, counting down the hours until he caught up. You knew the sound of his footsteps and the rhythm of his breathing and memorized how the sun hit his eyes down to the iris. Sometimes, you’d work with him directly and split the bounty evenly once it was completed. During conversations to kill time, though he never admitted it, he liked being around you as often as he was. Eventually, you told him about your furry friends back on the island and started marking the places you’d been with a hasty drawing of a dog. It became part of your routine and the time that it took for him to catch up to you decreased exponentially as a result. You’re easier to follow, is what he said. On a particular mission where you were unusually behind, you were delighted to find his gross attempt at mimicking the mark scratched into the wooden bar counter. 

You lose touch with him after a year or so of working together and you don’t expect it to hurt as much as it did. Word floated around that he was captured by Marines and posted up in Shells Town, but the same mouths reported that he escaped with pirates the following day. None of it sounded like him and it reminded you that you really didn’t know him at all. Still, you marked that silly dog into every barstool and backdoor you came across as you fell back into the same boring routines. 

Taking a rest day at a floating restaurant called Baratie, you think you’ve found the perfect spot to scratch into the counter when you realize that someone has already done it for you. It was horrendous and nearly incomprehensible, but you choke back a sob when you run your thumb over the mangled wood. There was only one person who could have drawn the little dog so badly.

And it’s like your body senses him before your mind does. 

In an instant, you’re hyper fixated on the familiar rhythm of his boots and the soft noise as his swords clank together with every step. There are four others with him, but you know his approach like the back of your hand. A boy in a straw hat whom you recognize from wanted posters rushes the bar, loudly requesting a glass of milk for himself and the finest rum for his swordsman companion. When he slides into the seat next to you, you can barely look at him, rendered defenseless from the conflict of emotions stirring in your mind. Thousands of questions were screaming to be answered but you couldn’t even open your mouth. The alcohol in your half-finished glass is all you can see. 

“You found me,” he murmurs, flagging down the bartender and asking for a bottle of whatever you’re drinking.

“I wasn’t looking for you,” you reply just as quietly, watching his hand carefully replenish your glass before filling his own and downing it in a few swallows. You stop him from pouring another with a light hand on his shoulder and he wordlessly sets down the bottle, making you smile softly. “You still drink too much.”

“I don’t have you to slow me down,” he replies without hesitation, glancing at your fingertip as it traces the mark he made on the wood. “I’ve been putting those everywhere since I joined up with Luffy. Figured we’d run into each other at some point.” 

“Luffy,” you echo. “That’s your pirate captain?” The irony of your situation escapes neither of you. If you were smart, you’d have every single one of them dead and bouncing around a burlap sack, just like the pirate all those years ago. But, just the same as the first time, you were stopped by a profound desire to be closer to Zoro. 

“He’s not like other pirates. Not like the ones you and I know.” 

“I’ll let the Marines know next time I bring in a head, then,” you laugh humorlessly, feeling the rum burn down your throat when you take another sip. You feel his eyes watching you carefully but you don’t look back at him. “I’m sure they’ll be thrilled to hear that.”

“They don’t have to hear anything,” he says in a low tone, one that sends goosebumps up your spine and has your heart beating a little faster. “They don’t have to hear anything from you ever again.”

“You’re not saying…”

“That's exactly what I’m saying.” 

“You want me to just switch sides like it’s nothing?”

“This job has been nothing to you from the beginning, nothing but a way to feed strays that, thanks to you, have loving homes,” he reminds you and you exhale deeply. He was right, but part of you wanted vengeance for all the times you secretly wished he was still with you. “So, come with me.”

“Zoro, I–”

“You know, I’ve missed you so much I can’t sleep,” he shakes his head and sighs in defeat. “Every time we dock at a new city, I’m hoping you’re on a hunt because, as much as I care for them, they’ll never know me the way you do.” He looks back at his crew with something like sad fondness in his eyes. They wouldn’t ever know him the way you did, as a bounty hunter with no real place to call home and no real people to call friends. “It gets lonely when you’re not forced to be alone anymore.”

“And it’s lonely when you are forced to,” you add. “It’s lonely either way–”

“But I’d rather be that way with you,” he concludes. “It’s not bad when I’m with you.” You pause, collecting your thoughts and calculating how much money you’d have if you suddenly abandoned your current line of work. It was risky, sure, but something about risking it on Zoro made it feel a little less dangerous. “Your silence tells me I convinced you.”

“I’m not the one you need to convince; it’s your captain you should be talking to.”

“Trust me, he’s the least of our problems.” As if to drive home his point, a choir of cheers rises up from behind you as a loud belch sounds through the harbor. 

“‘Our’ as in the crew, or ‘our’ as in you and I?”

“It’s always been you and I, hasn’t it?”

“It always will be,” you promise, letting your head fall onto his shoulder. He’s warm and safe and everything you were needing. “But, I need to teach you how to draw a better dog.” He hums in agreement, downing another glass contentedly. 

“Yeah, you need to teach me how to draw a better dog.”

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[mixelation]

i was like "i should towards finishing my fics on ao3" and then i opened google docs and wrote some other nonsense instead

anyway here's the minato-and-naruto quasi time travel thing i keep threatening to write

The problem with Hiraishin accidents was that they tended to be… strange. Most jutsu accidents ended with an explosion or a blade slipping or something like that. Hiraishin accidents ended with you standing in random places, sometimes with random pieces of clothing missing. 

Minato was a little surprised to end up in a park, but not immediately worried. He was still in Konoha, and all of his clothes were in place. The interesting part was that when he tried his experiment, it had been 2 PM at the height of summer. Now it was dark and markedly cold. 

He was in a park near the outskirts of the village. Hokage monument loomed in the distance. 

Minato blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the dark. This end of the park had a playground for children. It had several street lamps, but half of them were out. He was currently standing next to a slide, which was covered in graffiti. These details seemed odd to him, as he’d been an advocate for Konoha’s park maintenance. Konoha sinking all their funding and manpower into the Third Shinobi War meant Minato had grown up playing on rusty and half-broken equipment, and he’d promised his unborn son that he’d have nicer places to play. 

Minato was never going to get to be a father, and he saw this as all the more reason to support infrastructure changes to improve the village for families that did have children. He owed it to baby Naruto. 

Ah, well. This park was pretty far out. Maybe it was somehow getting missed. Minato mentally filed the problem away to address after he’d figured out if he’d… blacked out for a while, or whatever had just happened. 

There was one other presence in the whole park. A little kid was playing in a sandbox. Minato wondered where the kids’ parents were, this late at night. 

Minato approached the kid, making sure to make enough noise to be noticed. The kid froze in the middle of making some sort of… sand pile… and looked up at Minato with suspicious eyes. 

“What?” the kid demanded. He had light colored hair sticking out from under a knit hat. He scowled at Minato very seriously, which was adorably hilarious on such a young face. “What do you want?”

He must not recognize me, Minato decided, amused. It was dark, and the kid was pretty young. 

Minato squatted at the edge of the sandbox. There were random patches of grass in the sand. The kid puffed himself up, his scowl still in place. 

“Hey, kid,” Minato said. “I need some help. Can you answer some questions for me?”

“What questions?” the kid asked. “I’m allowed to be here, you know!”

Minato felt his stomach tighten slightly at the wording. It was so close to how Kushina used to talk, and this kid was about the age Naruto would be… 

Get a grip, Namikaze, Minato thought. This type of distraction was probably why he’d screwed up the Hiraishin to begin with. He needed to focus. Lots of people probably happened to speak like Kushina. 

“Actually, the park is closed after dark,” Minato said gently, and the kid looked scandalized. It was very cute. Minato winked. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone. Afterall, I’m here after closing too, aren’t I?”

The kid relaxed into a pout. He eyed Minato up and down, and Minato tried to look as friendly and unthreatening as possible. 

“You’re a ninja!” the kid finally said, visibly brightening. “You have a hitai-ate!”

He pointed. Minato grinned. 

“Sure am,” he agreed. 

“Then why do you need help from me?” the kid asked, eyes wide. 

At this point, it would have indeed been faster and more efficient to just teleport back to his office and ask an adult questions. But this kid was very cute, and Minato liked talking to the youth of Konoha. 

“I had a jutsu accident,” Minato said, very seriously. The kid’s eyes basically bulged out of his head. Adorable. “I’m afraid to tell any other ninja, in case they make fun of me. But you won’t make fun of me, will you?”

The kid got so excited he actually ended up on his feet, waving his arms intensely. Sand flew everywhere. 

“No way!” the kid yelled. “Everyone makes mistakes, you know! That’s what the old man says whenever I mess up, and I mess up a lot, you know. I don’t like when people make fun of me! So I won’t make fun of you, and if the other ninja make fun of you, I’ll beat them up for you!”

“Whoa, whoa!” Minato said, putting his hands up. This kid was enthusiastic. “That’s very nice of you, but you don’t need to beat anyone up for me, promise. Why don’t you hear my questions first?”

The kid took a deep breath. 

“Okay,” he said. 

“Do you know what time it is?” Minato asked. The kid shook his head. “Well, do you know what time you left your house?”

“I dunno,” the kid said. “But I didn’t come here from my house. I came from the Academy, you know! I’m training real hard to be a ninja too!”

The kid rambled for a bit, and Minato frowned as he listened to the story. The kid had had detention after class, after some prank he’d pulled on his teacher, and then he’d come immediately over to the park. He said he liked coming at night when the park was empty, because other children often wouldn’t let him play with the “good” equipment. 

“Usually I have to wait until after dinner,” the kid was saying. “But in winter it gets dark real early, you know!”

The kid did know the date. 

“Can you tell me… the year?” Minato said slowly. 

The kid told him.

If the kid was right, Minato had gone back in time five months. So that was… a new way for the Hiraishin to be messed up. What a terrifying discovery. 

When Minato, lost in thought, didn’t ask follow up questions, the kid was unperturbed. He continued to ramble about his ninja training. 

At least, if Minato really was back in time, it was only five months. If he couldn’t figure out how to undo it, he could just lay low those five months until his past self also winked out of time, and just step right back into his life. Unless that wasn’t how time travel worked…? Tobirama had written some theories on time travel and seemed to think it didn’t work that cleanly… 

“...and then I’m going to be Hokage!” the kid cried, pumping a fist in the air. 

Minato grinned, despite the situation. This kid was a riot. How had he not noticed him before? 

“I’m sure you will be,” Minato told him, reaching forward to place a hand on the kid’s hat, like he would to ruffle hair. “Thank you for helping me.”

Minato stood. He wanted to go to his office as soon as possible to get to work verifying he had time traveled, and maybe consult Tobirama’s old writings, but he also couldn’t just leave this kid alone. He’d drop him off at his home as quickly as possible, he decided. He’d love to see this kid’s reaction to realizing who he was. Or to getting to see his famous Hiraishin. 

“Hey, kid,” Minato said. “My name is Namikaze Minato. What’s yours?”

The kid didn't seem to recognize the name at all. But he beamed up at Minato, showing all his teeth. 

“This means we’re friends now, right?” the kid said. “I’m Uzumaki Naruto!”

The kid continued to ramble about how cool it was to have a ninja for a friend, but Minato couldn’t hear him. 

He couldn’t hear anything. He couldn’t see. He couldn’t breathe. 

Was this a joke? A sick prank by a villager? Or attack, even? A cruel, evil genjutsu, maybe? 

Minato suddenly wanted to flee, or maybe he wanted to fight, or to disappear forever. He had no name for this emotion, but he did push out his senses, tapping into his Hiraishin network. It lit up in his mind, scattered across the village. 

It was wrong. There were fewer markers than there should be. And… one extra one. 

Minato's gaze turned back to the kid in front of him. The kid had one of his markers in him, burning brightly at his stomach. 

“Hey, hey,” the kid said, taking Minato’s hand and tugging. “Are you alright, mister?”

Minato tried to dispel a genjutsu. Nothing happened. The kid was still staring up at him with blue eyes the exact shape of Kushina’s. 

“Na… naruto,” Minato said, the word feeling too intimate to be spoken out loud. The kid just blinked curiously up at him. “I… I need to take you home. Where are your parents?”

“Oh,” Naruto said. “Don’t worry about that! I don’t have any, so I can stay out as late as I want, you know.”

Minato stared at him. 

He sat on the edge of the sandbox. 

He stared at the kid some more. 

“Are you okay?” the kid asked, dubious. 

“Do you know who the Hokage is, Naruto?” Minato asked weakly. 

“Oh, yeah!” Naruto said. “Old man Third!”

“It’s not the Fourth?” Minato asked weakly. 

Naruto shook his head vigorously. “Nope! ‘Cause he’s dead.”

Minato did not have Tobirama’s theories on time travel memorized, but he had read through them. One theory was that true time travel wasn’t possible. Time was just infinite probabilities, constantly diverging with every decision anyone ever made, and one couldn’t go back in time because time simply wasn’t linear like that. 

But one could hop into a different probability. A different timeline, where things played out just slightly differently.

Minato also knew there was no way to fake a Hiraishin marker. His past self in this timeline made one and put it in this boy, the same way he’d wanted to do for baby Naruto when he realized the baby had to become the Kyuubi’s next container, before everything collapsed into Minato’s first and greatest failure as a father. 

Minato put his head between his knees and concentrated on breathing. 

“Whoa, mister!” Naruto cried and helpfully patted his back. “Are you sure you’re a ninja? You don’t seem very tough.”

Minato laughed weakly, staring at the dark grass from between his knees. “You said you wouldn’t make fun of me.”

“Yeah, well…” Naruto stuttered out. 

Naruto. 

Minato sat up and looked at his son. It was too dark to see every detail of Nruto’s face, but now that Minato knew to look, he looked just like Kushina. He even had the unusually chubby cheeks Kushina had hated as a kid. 

He wanted to hug him, to kiss his cheeks and beg for forgiveness. 

He also knew that would probably freak the poor kid out. 

“Sorry, Naruto,” he said finally. “I have… I have more questions. Can we go inside somewhere?”

Naruto squinted at him. 

“Are you some kind of loser ninja?” he asked. “You’re crying.”

Minato laughed. He was crying. How embarrassing.

[hetalia-club]

Anime references I’ve been tracking during the Olympics.

With photo proof that I could find.

An Italian track runner did Luffy’s 5 gear laugh right before his race. After getting bronze (I believe it was bronze) he was carrying around the Jolly Roger instead of the Italian flag wearing a straw hat. The day he got his medal he also did the 4th gear pose before his race. Also he DID come back for his next race with bleached hair I assume it was to embody 5th gear. He also explains one piece lore to teh woman interviewing him. I love this guy.

An American track runner did Gojo’s limitless finger thing before a race then after winning did the Kamehameha

British the British track team also did Gojo’s limitless sign after getting gold.

The French male fencing team did the Kamehameha when they got gold

An American Weightlifter did a Luffys 4 gear pose from One Piece.

When the Japanese Volleyball team won they played the Haikyu!! opening. Also the teams pick their history song so they picked that.

One of the Brazilian Volleyball players was just straight out there doing the fireball jutsu

A Japanese track runner was powering up dbz style before his run.

Another Japanese tracker runner did Johnathan’s pose from Jojo while introduced.

A Japanese Shooter just cosplayer a Jojo character

In the track stadium they played the Ultra Instinct theme from Dragon Ball.

The French men’s fencing team all did the Kamehameha

[hellbubu]

If you don’t like what I post, filter tags and block me. I’m not gonna argue with anyone.

Your girl is back and sleepy as fuck. Any mistakes are due to me being eppy. No, I won't correct shit.

I'm not a manga reader, but I'll place a bet. I bet he's like a newly improved bizarre doll or smth. I know Undertaker is involved (the OP kinda hints at it with the chain lockets. Even if Ciel has it, I associate it w/ Undertaker) and I know all that hair won't fit in the hat, so it can't be Undertaker.

What fucking jutsu did he use? Go get some training from Kakashi, Ciel, you lack speed.

They're so fucking extra. They're already in a room alone and talking so freely but about this? Nah, Seb needs to get closer to Bocchan. I bet that's the only reason he got closer to whisper.

Ah, Ciel used the Sexy Jutsu. I lost almost all respect for him. I dislike this jutsu (as well as the sexy male harem one).

Erwin, just hit with the left side or smth. IDK how this sport works, but I'm sure there are other fucking options 😭😭😭😭

This does actually work. I use it all the time.

Fuck you, bitch. But also, thank you for stopping the sexy jutsu.

I love how Sebastian is just running around dressed like a butler and no one says shit

This bitch is moving way too fast. Does Undertaker have this doll on drugs??? I doubt it. If that's Undertaker I swear to fucking God-

Ciel asks Iida to jump, and Iida doesn't even ask how high, he just jumps. Ciel has all of them wrapped around his finger.

Violet 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

This is my favorite JoJo pose.

Maybe the Headmaster was the friends we made along the way. Or maybe Undertaker used a doll so old, it turned to dusk when Sebastian touched it.

Ciel really is that bitch. He's starting to earn back my respect.

Bless your heart. Erwin, they are bending the fucking rules to win. Also, how the fuck is anyone supposed to see his hands??

They're also done with him.

TF are they feeding these kids???? Radioactive food to give them superpowers??? Like, did their chef just feed them whatever Hulk or some other here eats??

He did it on purpose. I love Ciel so much. That's like a new level of manipulation.

Y'all, your teammate is fucking bleeding. Get your priorities in order.

Take him to the doctor!!!! MY baby boy was bleeding!!!!!

[scooberfried]

YARN STYLE: SECRET HAT JUTSU 😂 Day 5! Of crocheting my friend a Sasuke hat! 🥰🥰

Was super happy with the colors I found for the hair and skin tones. Sasuke’s hair is like a midnight blue black and this navy color fit the bill pretty GOOD 😄😄

[myth-lord]

IN MORTAL KOMBAT

This would be my perfect Mortal Kombat game, roster and groups.

PLAYABLE CHARACTERS

GOOD CHARACTERS

ELEMENTAL GODS OF EARTH Raiden (Lightning / Thunder / Teleport) (Thunder Staff) Fujin (Wind / Air) (Gale Sword)

RAIDENS GENERALS& ALLIES / EARTHREALM DEFENDERS Shujinko (Copy Powers / Ki Energy / Kirin Spirit) (No Weapons) Nightwolf (Amarok) (Spirits / Shaman Magic / Possession / Animal Empathy) (Spirit Tomahawks / Spirit Bow) Madam Bo (Tough Skin / Xuanwu Spirit) (No Weapon) Ashrah (Holy Powers/ Light / Healing / Angelic Wings) (Holy Kriss) Johnny Cage (Force Energy) (Cage Knuckles) Siang (Sing & Sang) (Twin Merge / Ki Energy / Strength) (Moon Twin-Blades)

SHAOLIN / EARTHREALM CHAMPIONS Liu Kang (Fire / Serenity / Spirit Dragon) (No Weapon) Li Mei (Kinetic Explosions / Kitsune Spirit) (No Weapon) Kai (Supreme Acrobatics / Byakko Spirit) (Nunchaku) Kung Jin (Eagle Eyes / Perfect Aim / Phoenix Spirit) (Long Bow)

OUTWORLD/EDENIAN RESISTANCE Taven (Golden Body-Armor / Fire / Golden Dragon Control / Foresight) (Dragon Sword) Kitana (Wind) (Wind Fan-blades) Kotal (Solar / Beast Control / Beast Shapeshifter / Sacrifices) (Macuahuitl Sword / Ritual Sickles / Magic Totems) Jade (Plants)(Floral Bo / Razorang) Erron Black (Item & Weapon Wisdom / Danger Sense) (Sniper Rifle / Magical Traps / Revolvers) Sheeva (Gravity / Strength) (Bladed Shield) Syzoth (Reptile) (Acid / Poison / Agility) (No Weapon, Teeth & Claws)

SPECIAL FORCES Jax (None, Military Training) (Iron Arms give Extreme Strength) Sonya Blade (None, Military Training) (Force-Field Gloves, Force-Energy Exoskeleton) Kenshi (Telepathy / Telekinesis / Psychic / Ancestor Spirits) (Sento) Cyrax (Extreme Intelligence / Technokinetic) (Cyber Bombs / Cybernet / Other Laser tools / Mechanical Tentacles) Kurtis Stryker (None, Weapon and Explosive expert) (Grenades / Gun / Machine Gun / Baton)

SHIRAI RYU/ OLD LIN KUEI Scorpion (Hanzo) (Hellfire / Teleport) (Kunai Rope Dart / Demonic Sword) Sub-Zero (Kuai Liang) (Ice / Cold) (No Weapon, Ice Creations) Enenra (Tomas / Smoke) (Gas / Mist / Smoke / Demonic Possession) (Karambit Knife)

NEUTRAL CHARACTERS

SEIDO GUARD Hotaru (Order Energy / Order Voice) (Naginata of Order)

EVIL CHARACTERS

OUTWORLD ARMY Shao Kahn (Soul Magic / Size Shifter / Great Strength) (Wrath Hammer / Bladed Helmet) Sindel (Voice / Hair / Vertigo) (No Weapons, Living Hair) Reiko (Energy Absorb / Strategist Mind) (Razor Knuckles / Spear / Shuriken) Kollector (Magical Bag / Teleport / Transmute Touch / Object Mimic) (Chained Mace / Bolas / Chakram / Sickle) Shang Tsung (Soul Magic / Shapeshifter / Naga Cobra Spirit) (No Weapons) Kung Lao (Sharpness / Spinning / Wind / Kamaitachi Spirit) (Magical Bladed-Hat) Mileena (Phasing / Regeneration / Senses) (Sai Swords, Fangs) Baraka (Bone Control / Regeneration / Extreme Senses) (No Weapons, Weapons made from own Bones) Kintaro (Gravity / Extreme Strength / Fire Breath) (No Weapon, Tigran Claws & Teeth) Ermac (Soul Magic / Soul Army / Soul Summon) (No Weapon) Chameleon (Invisibility / Shapeshift / Killer Tongue / Agility) (No Weapon, Teeth, Claws & Tongue) Rain (Water / Weather) (Jamadhar Katar) Tanya (Illusions / Dreams / Fire) (Kobu Jutsu)

BROTHERHOOD OF SHADOW Quan Chi (Soul Magic / Necromancy / Summon) (Skull Mace) Bi-Han (Saibot / Umbra) (Shadow / Darkness / Teleport) (Death Scythes) Sareena (Demon Form / Teleport / Strength) (No Weapon, Demonic Claws) Drahmin (Pain / Voodoo Skin / Strength) (Iron-Club) Moloch (Fear / Strength) (Ball N Chain) Nitara (Blood Magic / Mind Control / Summon Skarlet) (No Weapon, Blood Weapons & Vampire Claws)

BLACK/REDDRAGON Daegon (Dragon Control / Foresight / Dragonfire / Enhance Powers) (Dark Dragon-Sword) Kano (None, Depends on Tools) (Butterfly Knives / Bionic Laser Eye / Magnetic-Control Gloves / Boot Blades) Mavado (None, Cannibal) (Blade Whips with Stun / Boot Blades / Iron Implant Teeth) Kabal (Extreme Speed) (Hookswords / Sawblades) Kira (Probability / Luck / Living Tattoos) (Poison Claws / Clover-Shaped Shuriken / Poison Lipstick) Tremor (Earth / Vibrations / Matter Absorption) (No Weapons, Weapons made from his own earth-like body) Takeda (Psychic Animation / Psychic) (Psychic Knives and Shuriken) Kobra (Force Punch & Kick) (No Weapons)

CHURCH OF CHAOS Havik (Dairou) (Chaos Magic / Possession / Extreme Regeneration / Flesh Control) (Chaos Mace) Darrius (Intelligence / Diseases) (Alchemical Gauntlets) Ferra (Empathy / Magic Bonding) (Hand Claws) D’Vorah (Vermin / Poison / Regeneration / Implant) (No Weapons, Insectoid Body) Geras (Time / Strength / Sand) (Sand Axe)

TEKUNIN/ NEW LIN KUEI Sektor (Fire Cybernetics) (Homing Missiles / Laser Swords / Flamethrower) Frost (Ice Cybernetics) (Ice Bombs / Ice Blades) Chrome (Liquid Steel) (No Weapons, Liquid Metal Body)

NPC, BOSSES and SUMMONED CHARACTERS

TITAN/ELDER BEING Kronika (Titan of Time)

ELDER GODS Cetrion (Elder God of Life) (Boss, for evil characters) Shinnok (Elder God of Death) (Boss, for good characters) Abacus (Elder God of Order) (Boss, for all characters) Zaggot (Elder God of Chaos) (Boss, for all characters)

ELEMENTAL GODS Kagutsuchi (Earth God of Fire) (Deceased, Killed by Smoke & Sub-Zero, when still working for the evil Lin Kuei) Dojin (Earth God of Earth) (Deceased, Killed byTremor, while still a member of evil Lin Kuei) Suijin (Earth God of Water) (Deceased, Killed by Bi-Han while still alive and with the Lin Kuei)

DEFENDERS OF EARTH Bo Rai Cho (Madam Bo’s Husband) Mocap (Johnny Cage Summoned Helper)

EDENIAN GODS/ROYALTY Argus (Edenian God of Sight and Vision) (Deceased, Killed by Daegon) Delia (Edenian Goddess of Fire) (Deceased, Killed by Daegon) Jerrod (Edenian King) (Deceased, Killed by Shao Kahn) Sapphira (Edenian Queen, and real mother of Kitana) (Deceased, Killed by Sindel) Omegis (Edenian Minor Goddess of Plants) (Deceased, Killed by Tanya & Rain)

SPECIAL FORCES Jacqueline Bridge (Jax Daughter, Cyrax Lover) Cassie Blade (Sonya’s Sister) (Deceased, Killed by Kano & Hsu Hao)

OUTWORLD ARMY Goro (Leader of the Shokan) (Deceased, Killed by Motaro) Motaro (Shao royal guard) (Shao Kahn Summoned Minion) Meat (Entire group of creations, Guards of Flesh Pits) (Shang Tsung Summoned Minions)

BROTHERHOOD OF SHADOW Kia (Sareena’s and Ashrah’s Sister Demon) (Deceased, Killed by Ashrah) Jataaka (Sareena’s and Ashrah’s Sister Demon) (Deceased, Killed by Ashrah) Skarlet (Blood Golem created from Nitara’s own Blood) (Nitara Summoned Minion) Shadow Priests (Quan Chi Summoned Minions)

BLACK DRAGON Jarek (Axe Murderer, Prisoner on Seido) (Deceased, Killed by Jax during Seido prison outbreak) Tasia (Murderous Vixen, Prisoner on Seido) (Deceased, Killed by Sonya during Seido prison outbreak) No-Face (Pyromaniac, Prisoner on Seido) (Deceased, Killed by Seido Guards & Johnny Cage during the Seido prison outbreak) Hsu Hao (Smith and Cybernetic creator for Black Dragon)

CHURCH OF CHAOS Torr (Prisoner on Seido) (Ferra Summoned Minion)

TEKUNIN/ NEW LIN KUEI Grandmaster (Sektor’s Father, name unknown) (Deceased, Killed by Sektor) Hydro (Water-Based Cyborg) (Deceased, Destroyed by Sub-Zero and Scorpion)

OTHER Onaga (End Boss)

[sporksaber]

If hiruzen (and danzo bc if he was alive itd be him or a puppet hokage he controlls) did die two decades earlier who would become the fifth hokage after Minato died? Like, Kakashi would be too young and inexperienced, they couldn't allow a clan head to do it, and the sannin had all dipped.

Depending on the timeline you use (bc I think there was retconning/unreliable information) orochimaru could have still been around. (If you use anko's age, he had to of been in the village when naruto was born. Anko is 24, was a genin between the ages of 10 to 12, and didn't catch orochimafu's attention until her first chunin exam. So it was at most 13 years before the start of naruto when she recieved her curse mark.)

Orochimaru becomes hokage and raises naruto au.

Cannon plays out with orochimaru still in the village until naruto is born, at which point there's some bullshittery that leads to hiruzen dying. As he dies he names orochimaru his heir under the condition he raises naruto (this condition may or may not be secret blood/soul binding jutsu enforced. Whichever ends up being funnier).

Orochimaru looks at little infant naruto and is like, I hate you and your father, and then carries him off to go claim his hat.

Now, I headcannon orochimaru as being kind of shit at administrative work entirely because he's never done it before and obviously none of hiruzen or Minato advisors want to support him. So he's not having a great time.

Cue his secret root research buddy danzo popping up to try to blackmail him. This lasts about two hours of orochimaru playing along before he kills him and is done with it.

At some point durring the early days of orochimaru settling into his position and dealing with the work that goes into rebuilding a destroyed village mikoto pops up at his house like where is my godson. And orochimaru let's her in and then she's like oh my madara you built him an actual nursery, I expected to find him in a closet. Orochimaru wats to be offended, but he did try that at first.

It is a number of months until orochimaru is able to properly get back into root, at which point, much to his disgust, naruto has started crawling. Orochimaru is still a shit person but he's been distracted away from his immortality bullshit. I'm going to say he was definitly dabbling in curse marks before this but whether or not he put one on anko yet is hard to decide.

Regardless, Anko is frequently forced to babysit naruto and is pissed about it.

But back to root, orochimaru has a moment where he decides that he's not hiruzen or Minato and the nice village act is unnecessary. So he just folds all the parts of root into the corresponding legitimate divisions of the village. Hiding shit is unnecessary when you're a military dictator. Are there division heads who are horrified by all the shit that was going on that they didn't know about (but they know hiruzen and most likly Minato did)? Yep. But what are they gonna say about it? (Especially when it's decades old?) So orochimaru does continue his experiments and some are genuinly horrible, although there is less done on orphans as a side affect of it not being as hidden anymore.

[A note before I continue, I'm not considering the madara rabbit goddess stuff here. It's too complicated and the kind of arc I personally always skip.]

Back to the Uchiha. The lack of people actively trying to screw them over means their social status in the village is much better than it was before. Itachi is probably still pulled into anbu very young, and I think he'd eventually become orochimaru's apprentice. He also hates orochimaru, but that's besides the point. Orochimaru allows it because he still doesn't like administrative shit and eventually plans to go back to his experiments full time. If he didn't have a point to prove he'd of bailed already. Itachi ends up in the assistant position fanon sakura often ends up in for tsunade and Kakashi where they make sure the paperwork is actually done and no extreme diplomatic issue pops up due to their sensei's shit personality.

Speaking of tsunade, she defs comes to visit after the first few years. She kind of ends up just getting into constant arguments with orochimaru (who probably uses toddler/very young child naruto to mess with her often) and reorganize the hospital before leaving again. Jiraya takes longer to visit. He probs had an argument with orochimaru early on, and jiraya is being stubborn while orochimaru knows he'll crawl back eventually.

What else do I need to cover? Naruto loves his wierd pale dad (who does not let him call him dad under any circumstances). He ends up living a very comfortable life. Orochimaru's parenting style is very science based so he never needs anything physically and all the emotional needs are met by mikoto and to a lesser extent anko and Kakashi (who was put on guard duty fir like a week when there was a kyubi kidnaping threat and then just never left). He gets to grow up besties with Sasuke, and does very well in the restructured academy (because the Canon academy doesn't really teach shit and orochimaru made it include harder and more spread out topics with the option of specialization) as he now has a support network to work with his needs.

Anyone who knows me knows sakura is my favorite character. She thrives under the new academy and is able to have all her strengths worked on to the point she's on par or better than naruto and Sasuke when they're put on a team together. (I imagine teams are planned I'm advance to a certain extent. I always find reasoning people give for sakura to be on their team really fun.)

Sasuke is still a dick, but without the trauma and with his mom to put him in his place. Also, like in the manga, he has a bit of reciprocation for sakura's crush (which isn't as strong here), but idk if they'd be endgame.

Orochimaru does come to care for naruto. Because it's naruto. But he is never really affectionate outright. (Naruto knows he loves him though. Which he does in his own way.)

I think im one for now. Enjoy.

[dark-elf-writes]

I adore them being the best of their fields but also disturbingly good at each others too. Like there’s only so many times Sakura and Sasuke can listen to Naruto talk about highly advanced seals without picking up some things. Only so many times Sasuke can talk about jutsu creation before they try it themselves. Only so many times Sakura can talk about pressure points and healing before they understand it too.

And then combining each others knowledge instead of neatly separating everything like the sannin before them did. No more is it Tsunades healing and strength, Jiraiya’s sealing and spying, or Orochimaru’s jutsus and swordsmanship. It’s Naruto and Sakura making a seal to heal someone, Sasuke and Sakura creating lightning jutsus that specifically target the nervous system, Naruto and Sasuke creating new moves that combine their wind and fire.

Also them having terribly screwed standards bc they’ve been around the best if the best since the beginning.

And it’s not just them combining talents. It’s in the middle of a battle when Naruto is too far gone into Jinchuriki mode to need a weapon Sakura could take the sword orochimaru had gifted him and use it just as well as Naruto can. It’s their summons listening to the other two just as readily as the one that signed the contract. It’s Naruto, even lost to Kurama’s power still recognizing Sakura and Sasuke and them being able to calm him down again.

It’s them being so connected that those closest to them joke that they’re one soul in three bodies. It’s teasing of Ino and whoever else would be romantically interested that they would be gaining three spouses instead of the one. It’s further down the line if they were to have kids all of them being raised as siblings more than cousins because Naruto Sasuke and Sakura cannot imagine another option.

It’s the three of them on unofficially sharing the hat with Naruto as their face.

It’s Konoha as it could have been without the constant curse of Team Seven shattering time and time again.

Please just everyone being so down with how skewed their perception of what should be reasonably possible for three people

Shikamaru: you’re telling me the three of you stopped what could have been the start of another war pretty much single-handedly?

Naruto: What like it’s hard?

Shikamaru: For most people yes it is hard!

[prettywarriors]

Mini Mahou March Year 4 Week 2

Hey everyone and welcome to the second week of Mini Mahou March! You can find the main post for the event here X.

The Prompt for the week of March 9th-March 15th is…

Ninja Witch/Majokko!

The classic genre, often times a girl with a trinket allowing her to change into something or someone else, and sometimes royalty from another kingdom sent to earth to better herself

This is, of course, not a full overview of the genre, which also includes more traditional mischievous witchcraft, the occasional rival, and fighting cat themed villains.

Ninjas. Believe it.

I’m only looking for a visual character design, something as simple as a single fullish-body picture, but you are more than welcome to go as wild as you want with trinkets, backstory, information, alt outfits, all that good stuff. Also I say girl but girl boy nb other as long as it’s a magical humanoid gender be damned, thumbs up. (Also nothing 18+ please. Your characters can be, just not your art for this)

Make your post and tag me before end of day March 15th (11.59EST) and I will be re-blogging participants here next Monday, with everything tagged Mini Mahou March.

Toei Majokko outside of Honey didn’t have much in way of A Set Transformation Outfit, and boy did they like red. Usually their defining feature as a magical girl would be their trinket, often a compact or baton, or a piece of jewelry

Cute Witches later down the line went heavier on the Witch idea, so big pointy hats, capes, brooms, wands

Witch hat with a naruto headband on it. Incorporating your wand into your jutsus Big shuriken for a broom Lean into the all black looks associate with both Katana wand Believe it

[wendyfulmother]

N.aruto Verse

Wendy's relationship with the Sensei's! For her relationships involving the Konoha Rookies (Teams 7 ,8 ,10 , & 3 [Guy]), Here are Part's 1 & 2!

Kakashi: Considering that K.akashi is one of Wendy's two godfathers, he and Wendy have the closest bond. Due to being in the ANBU when she was little, he couldn't visit her as often. Yet, despite this, he ALWAYS watched over her. He made up for lost time though the day that she accompanied Team 7 to help rescue her youngest brother, Michael. Since that day, the two of them rekindled their bond. He begins to train her during the period before the events of S.hippudden. During all that time and during S.hippuden, the two of them have a father & daughter like bond. He sees her like his own child, as he was entrusted to protect her with the godfather title. It's also the fact that Wendy has gotten quite a bit of his sass, especially as a teenager. She eventually becomes one of the few people besides her mother Mary and Guy to see what's behind that mask of his. Guy: The other one of Wendy's godfathers. He was the one who was there the most Guy absolutely loves his god-daughter and like Kakashi, would do anything for her at the drop of a hat. He protects her just as much as he does his own team. He helps trains Wendy in taijutsu during the timeskip while Kakashi was off on missions. Asuma: Wendy thought that Asuma was really chill and nice. He was always there to lend advice if the kids needed it, especially Wendy. His de*th leaves a very big scar in her heart and she feels responsible for his demise by not being strong or fast enough to stop Hidan. She wasn't able to attend his funeral due to being in the hospital for injuries during the fight with both Hidan & Kakuzu. Kurenai: Wendy is the least close with Kurenai out of the four main sensei. Wendy admires her abilities and her kindness. Whenever she sees Kurenai, she always gives her a wave. After the war and once Kurenai has Mirai, Wendy often offers to babysit the child for Kurenai when she needs to go on errands. J.iraiya: Wendy didn't know Jiraiya all TOO well, but she had heard tell that he was a very good writer. Though, she was not allowed to read any of his books (honestly for good reason). From the times that she did get to talk to him, Wendy thought he was very wise when it came to life advice or jutsu advice...other advice though, not so much. She was upset when he d*ed and was devastated for Naruto. She was there with Kakashi, Sakura, Sai, Yamato and Lady Tsunade when Lord Fukasaku told Naruo the news of his passing. T.sunade: Wendy absolutely admires Lady Tsunade. She thinks she's very strong and smart. She always goes to her whenever Kakashi and Guy aren't around for advice. Though sometimes, Wendy can be quite intimidated by her due to her frighting nature when she's angry. Nonetheless, Wendy sees her as an incredible Hokage and a phenominal leader.

[angerofangels]

Teaching in 2024 so far.

-very first day of school I help a kid out of the car whose name is Castiel. I know its the spn one bc his dad calls him 'Cas' and has a twitch.tv hat and also wanted to take a postable video of him walking to class

- very small girl is playing with her stuffed dog, looks up at me and says "She's dabbing on you!"

- Tried (and Failed) to remove a girl's school ipad background image of sexy jutsu Naruto. There were about thirty other screencaps from the episode in the gallery.

- a usually very tempermental and cantankerous child showed me his drawing of the 7 versions of skibidi toilet

[yowyowyaoi]

*Deidara, getting ready to go outside and shovel with Hidan*

Deidara: Sasori … come on …

Sasori: *busily dressing Deidara for going outside* 

Sasori, checking items off to himself: Gloves, two pairs of socks, boots, sweater, coat, hat —

Deidara: Do I have to wear all this, hm?

Sasori, wrapping a second scarf around Deidara’s neck: You don’t have to, no. But I think you should. It’s rather cold out, and I don’t want you getting sick. I love you and all I want is for you to be well. Okay?

Deidara: *sighs* Okay. I guess I can’t argue with that. Saying those stupid sweet things … you don’t play fair, Danna.

Sasori: Neither do you.

Deidara: What do you mean?

Sasori: *smiles and wraps his arms around Deidara’s waist* Even in this many layers … you’re still the most beautiful, sensual creature in the universe. *whispers in his ear* I can’t wait to warm you up when you come back inside. So the faster you get it done … *moves a bit of scarf to playfully kiss Deidara’s neck*

Deidara: *blushes* Powerful motivation, hm. C’mon Hidan, let’s get going!

Hidan, talking to Kakuzu: Oi, bastard; aren’t ya gonna wrap a scarf around me or somethin’?

Kakuzu: No. You’re a grown man. You should know how to dress yourself appropriately for cold weather.

Hidan: Well … *puts both arms around Kakuzu’s shoulders* When I come in, do you wanna “warm me up”, too? Mmmm?

Kakuzu: Fine, brat. Do a good job and I’ll heat your entire body up when you come back.

Hidan: *kisses Kakuzu’s cheek, then races outside after Deidara*

Sasori: Well, that was nice of you. I didn’t think —

Kakuzu, yelling: Itachi!! In about 15 minutes come in here, please; I’ll need you to utilize your fireball jutsu for me.

Sasori:

[lost-and-cursed]

Was tagged by @debellatis for a 5 favorite characters challenge:

"List five of your all time favorite characters and then tag five people to do the same. We'll see which character of the five gets voted the most loved."

Ugh... Who are all my blorbo's once more? And roughly equal in weight at that....

Curse of remembering your blorbos and Blessing of bragging about your blorbo's be upon ya

@jorisjurgen @sapphicvalkery @sockdrawerdemon @aromantisk-fagforening @jasonmantitstodd + @minahuston (cause I know you won't participate, but I dare you to prove me wrong)

A little bit of propaganda under cut because I can

Jason Todd (on the left)

Aka child vigilante turned dead turned mob boss who decided that dead enemies are better than dead you! Very inspiring. Book nerd, very crafty, attempted to steal tires from the Batmobile when he was nine, a killer, a middle brother, snarky, caring and just very petty person.

Jaster Mereel (on the right)

Aka you like your blorbos obscure. A Mandalorian. Long dead adoptive father of Jango Fett. Supposedly nerd historian, good ruler and father, and someone who wrote a ridiculously long philosophical paper on the nature of his culture, ways to preserve it and make it true to modern times.

Tobirama Senju (on the left)

Aka one of Konoha's finders. Ridiculously competent, brilliant scientist, ruthless warrior, cold to point of awkward. Loves learning?creating jutsus and his brother, if fandom to be believed the only person who thought about infrastructure when idea of making village came up.

(yes all my blorbo's are at least supposedly nerds, how did you guess it)

Urahara Kisuke (on the right)

Brilliant sassy scientist, but make him slightly evil trashfire. A lot of brain cells, none of them are figuring out morals or socialization. Had one brilliant crush, that he followed in military assassination squad, then got his own research facilities, low-key committed attrocities, effectively invented an atomic bomb, that got stolen by the villain. Yay. He's sorry though. A little. Wasn't caught on accusations of treason and build his own lab masquerading as effectively tea shop. He also has a funny hat. And a cane! Favorite war criminal what can I say

I thought about putting here hp character next, but Hp doesn't deserve rights and I mostly hallucinate chatacters from there, so instead I gonna brag about a character that quite literally isn't translated in English.

His name is Roque Alva from Reflections of Aeterna and he's at different points High General, Warlord, Duke and something between chosen one and cursed one. He's ridiculously competent, history nerd, drunk, whore and has enough sass to fell the county. He has trust issues longer than the borders he sworn to protect. He's effectively immortal because of the curse, but everyone he even remotely cares about die around him or betray him. (He also pretty sure that's because he sold his soul to devil. He didn't. It's technically perk of being divinely ordained to be king. He doesn't want to be one). He also the only sane person in the books (saving my sanity by proxy) and has ridiculously high resonance in type of thinking and existing to mine, so he's the only character I would claim kin for, so please love him or your blorbo rotator will malfunction for three weeks ^^

[rwby-sk]

Im really hoping Neo's semblance gets away from her and turns on herself

So she needs the heroes' help

It's the only speedrun defection i can think of that can work in 4 episodes

Besides a very quick mature-Jaune inspired talk-no-jutsu involving Pyrrha's sash and Roman's hat

[luckycheesefoodie321]

HAHAHAAHAHA ALL OF THEM RAPID FIRE DEMANDING RAIZO DO NINJA STUFF FOR THEM

Torao really is a similar feather to the Straw Hats. Putting in his own request for the Shadow Clone jutsu XD