#happening without undoing all their development and their dynamics with each other

[tired-shadow1]

Quick warning ⚠️: There are major spoilers for the ending of Tokyo Revengers in the tags, so don't hit "see all" if you don't want the ending spoiled.

I have been thinking about my Tokyo Revengers phase from a few years back, honestly its probably because JJK is coming to an end soon, and people are hoping that its ending is better than what Tokyo Revengers got.

I remember reading the chapters as they came out and worrying about what character might die next and hoping that it's not yet another one of my favorite characters. It was a really fun time, and I loved the series and the characters. However, the ending was, um, certainly something. Honestly, the less said about it, the better.

I'm probably gonna rewatch what I have seen of the anime, then watch season 3 because I remember that the me from 2021 really wanted to see the Tenjiku arc animated, and it's been out for a while now.

[illusianation]

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE:

The stark differences in reception to Carol’s and Daryl’s arcs in The Book of Carol

When a show makes its audience work overtime to either rationalize, or completely pan its choices, there’s a fundamental disconnect between the producers, writers, and the characters they’re supposed to understand. It’s frustrating when the fans can see the potential in a character or dynamic that the creators don’t seem to fully grasp, or worse like with #TWDCaryl , choose to exploit the shit out of it for purposes that just seem illogical on all fronts.

For years, inconsistencies in both Daryl and Carol’s storylines on the flagship left us trying to bridge gaps that should have been addressed at the time. Historically, the audience has always had to make sense of the disconnect, but nothing compares to what we're seeing now.

Carol’s current arc in The Book of Carol, is actually making brilliant amends in that regard. Melissa has such a strong sense of who Carol is—her trauma, her growth, her motivations—and she’s not just acting; she’s advocating for a coherent, cohesive story. Melissa continues to prove that when you have a deep understanding of your character, strong advocacy for said character, and the ability to execute the vision, amazing things are possible.

On the flip side, watching Daryl get almost the opposite treatment makes it clear what’s missing. It’s not just a missed opportunity, it’s genuinely sad when you know the character, what he is capable of when given the right depth and development, AND what the actor can do with it. Without a clear understanding of why or when the actor has to explain what's happening by literally retconning his own character instead of showing it in the performance, we get a Daryl who, at best, feels like a hollow shell and at worst, a different person entirely.

The saving grace is supposed to be the dynamic of Carol and Daryl and the sorcery that Melissa and Norman create when they’re together. The Ole Caryl magic is undeniable, not just because of their chemistry but because they make each other better—both the characters and the actors. The creative team’s failure to capitalize on that, and even worse, cheapen it, especially when it’s so obvious and beloved by fans, is just an insult to the core audience and the biggest waste of rich opportunity.

Even if S3 pulls it together, it won’t completely undo the damage already done. We’ve seen the show pull itself together before—S9 and 10 are proof that with the right focus (and leadership), characters can make sense again in the larger story. But they need to get back to what works, and fast. The time for retelling old storylines and recycling old scenes is over.

Some of the fans are still here, waiting for that spark, but the clock is ticking, and the cost has already been too high. The narrative needs to stop feeling like a jumbled mess of mischaracterizations and creative whims and get back to the grounding force, the HEART & SOUL of the story, Carol & Daryl on the same path forward together.

[proshippers-against-censorship]

hope what i’m bringing up here is appropriate for this blog. i could try finding any other outlet, internal or outside resources that would help me get through this, but i’m trying not to ruffle any feathers.

so, since last year i’ve been watching something i used to be into when i was younger and participating in its fandom. through rewatching it i found out that i shipped two characters that i always had a noticeable affinity towards, except i realized i like the pairing way more as an adult because of everything i missed between them since i last saw the show. they were paired with different characters by the end and even if it was shown to make more “sense” for them according to the greater fandom, i initially didn’t care because of how much i enjoyed their dynamic thoughout the show’s duration. i felt that it brought out a bunch of discussion to be told whether you saw it the lens of a romatic or platonic relationship. most of what happened in the show’s main timeline could not go on without their involvement, and their individual development arcs kicked off because of the undeniable romantic relationship they tried to pursue at one point.

the big thing about their relationship that apparently makes it a “proship”/comship is the huge age difference between them, and unfortunately that’s unfortunately all what the fandom sees them for. i feel that even when talking about the romantic/sexual aspect of them together and the implications, they have one of the least discussed dynamics i’ve seen of many of the major characters, which doesn’t make sense because they’re both the male and female mcs. it’s always “thank god they didnt get together, i’m sick at the thought of them with each other” even though thats beyond what their relationship was like as the story was drawing to a close. one tweet i saw which was a quote of one which showed a screenshot of the characters in the ship i’m talking about in a canonical platonic showing was something along the lines of “the four people who still ship this must be on suicide watch” which is just an awful thing to think of about anyone.

i do try to feel good about shipping them publicly despite all thats been brought towards me for it. or, at least the nothingness of it. a lot of blogs i’ve interacted with and been interested about following in the past through tag scrolling have blocked me for shipping it. i know this because i always notice that a couple blogs who mainly post about the fandom aren’t on my dash. it’s weird, i don’t even like it as a “standard” underage ship. i’m not saying they’re wrong for keeping themselves safe from things they don’t like, it just glooms me out because i still want to interact with much of the fandom, even if we don’t agree on stuff. i’m too old to be spiralling over these things and activating the sanctification in me i’m trying hard to undo to enjoy my hobbies. why does it even matter to me this much that people block me because they don’t like shit i create or post

with this i feel like anti culture absolutely neuters any kind of intellectual discussion about characters who were in a “problematic” relationship and gone out of it to be part of a standard platonic one. i don’t how unique it is for this ship, but i do imagine that people look into the bad things about it far too much. and hey, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure

(i’m being vague to protect myself from antis who might find me out and send me dumb shit, forgive me)

No, no, you're very right. The rise of anti culture has definitely led to a decrease in having decent, intellectual conversations about pairings in media and how the relationships between characters shift in ways that display incredibly important aspects of their stories.

But that ties back to the loss of media literacy, I fear.

[calamitoustide]

Oh my gosh do you have any headcanons about dorlilylene?? I’ve read dorlene and I’ve seen a bit of lilylene but not a ship with all three and wow I’m so intrigueddddd

Hi! Okay, so this is a ship I was really thinking about last night they make me insane.

I am thinking about an modern day AU right now but I'm sure I could put it in canon if I think about it a little bit...

In my head it starts with lilylene but in the case of them being childhood best friends they don't actually date. There's just always something about them. Marlene could confess or try to kiss Lily who turns her away but it doesn't always have to happen. They are joined at the hip though, they race around their backyards dressed as pirates and make forts in the living room giggling the entire time. They were kids together, they grew up together, and they always had each other. They dreamed of living together forever, they dreamed of building a castle in the clouds where they'd spend the rest of their days. That is until either a) Lily's entire family moves away for years or b) They have a huge falling out and don't talk for years. Either way they move away from each other.

In comes Dorlene. During Lily's absence Marlene gets really close with Dorcas. They fit each other. Dorlene is sharp and she's a little mean, but so is Marlene they similar in ways that makes it seem like they won't work well together but they do. Dorcas helps Marlene figure out exactly who she is. They sit together in a dimly lit bathroom while Dorcas puts pink highlights in Marlene's hair. It's the same night Marlene pierces Dorcas' nose while the color is still sitting in her hair. Dorcas forces Marlene to buy that electric guitar she had her eyes on for ages and Marlene learns all of Dorcas' favorite songs so she can play them and impress her. Everything thinks they're already together before they actually are.

Then Lily comes back into the picture and she sees Marlene again and she's met with so much nostalgia. It's the awful kind, it sticks to his ribs and will turn into her undoing. Marlene looks different but she's the same kid she was best friends with. They're together and it's like no time has passed. Lily doesn't realize her feelings, not really, but she is head over heels in love with Marlene from the moment she sees her again.

And then she meets Dorcas.

Basically their dynamic to start is Marlene's first love with Lily even if it never turned into anything but now she likes Dorcas, Dorcas likes Marlene, and Now Lily likes Marlene but Lily and Dorcas do not speak or interact in fact they kinda hate each other.

And then! as time goes on Lily and Dorcas have to interact because they're both in Marlene's life. They both develop these awful feelings for each other honestly it's just fucking annoying at this point. They can't stand it. Marlene tries to shove them alone in rooms together to make sure they can actually interact without tearing each others heads off. She wants her best friend and girlfriend to get along... and it backfires a little bit but also maybe it doesn't... it gets to the point where everyone likes everyone but no one is saying anything. Marlene and Dorcas are together and Lily just has to watch knowing she's in love with both of them now.

Marlene wouldn't want to try anything with her that's her best friend she doesn't want to lose her, and Dorcas honestly finds it entertaining watching Lily embarrass herself around them so she doesn't say anything at first, but eventually one of them breaks (Lily) and they all kiss.

So it's very messy to start out with and honestly a little messy the entire way through but they're in love your honor!

[firefaerie81]

(liveblog tag in chronological order)

*deep breath*

Soooo, yeah. The other shoe has dropped.

The moment I've been simultaneously dreading because it's such a gut punch and looking forward to because I have a LOT to say. Buckle up, this is gonna be a long one.

I played dumb on this instead of analyzing in context and hinting at what was to come because I have biases, and I wanted y'all to understand those biases so you might understand where I'm coming from in how I read this.

That's not to say I lied. I believe the things I've said about her over the course of my liveblog, but there's more to it that we have to get into now.

Now, I won't say there's NO merit to this twist. I see the intended setup and payoff, it raises the stakes for what was supposed to be the next season, and the drama can go places.

But I think it's a misstep because I don't think it's worth as much as what we lost in the process.

I REALLY liked this character and her relationship with Lion-O, and that colors how I respond to this twist and how I want it to go forward. Like I said, I'm biased. So, let's talk about those biases, and how I read Pumyra.

But first, one brief aside:

Mumm-Ra being able to track them was supposed to have been a clue about Pumyra, but like. He was doing that long before they even FOUND Pumyra, so what the hell?

Anyway, I've explained why I like Pumyra. Ever since I got to her introduction in this liveblog I have not shut up about how much I like her. Her spitfire attitude, her strong will, and her unique perspective made her a phenomenal addition to the cast that spiced things up without being a rehash of Lion-O and Tygra's clashes.

She filled a niche that improved the team composition, and she had a really solid arc that showed her as a complex person with multiple sides, able to grow and change. If this twist hadn’t happened, Pumyra would be one of the most well developed characters in the show.

Because this twist completely recontextualizes her and basically undoes all of her development. She's reset right back to where she started, but even more angry and vengeful. But I would prefer to think that her real personality is still more or less what we saw. Like her backstory, we got the gist with the darkest parts hidden.

Her anger at the mistreatment of the cats, helping a baby bird back into its nest, etc. There were these bits of heart to her that don’t scan as just an act to me. And honestly, I don't want to think that this character I liked has suddenly become a blank slate, because she was an AMAZING character.

I think this twist is a misstep because it’s so much LESS interesting than the character development we’ve been watching her go through, which is now being tossed out the window. We already saw her overcome this same general idea, and now you’re saying all that was fake and doesn't count? Thanks, I hate it!

I also haven’t been subtle about how much I like Lion-O and Pumyra’s relationship before this point. I think they had an amazing dynamic of rounding each other out, and they had some great moments together. But, well, this throws all of that out of whack.

We’re meant to assume that she coldly seduced Lion-O, but I don’t find that interesting. And to be frank, that plus the way he accused Cheetara of toying with him and never retracted it onscreen is not a great look for the show.

With Cheetara, it was more interesting for her to not end up with Lion-O because the potential relationship there was superficial and one-sided. But with Pumyra, that potential relationship really felt like a two way street that improved them both, and it felt like they had a real connection.

I don't think it's worth it to just throw all of that away. Again, we’re taking all of this lovingly built character and relationship development and throwing it out the window. And that’s frustrating, so I don’t want that to be how this goes.

Instead, I posit to you the classic mole dilemma: “I was sent to betray these people, but oops, getting to know them made me actually care, and now I have to carry out my mission even though I maybe have doubts.”

Mumm-Ra says he owns her soul now. Depending on how seriously we take that verbage, it implies a level of control that if Pumyra maybe isn't fully on board with something he wants her to do, it doesn’t really matter. And, y'know, it's Mumm-Ra; he doesn't give his underlings a choice. So that gives me some wiggle room to interpret. Please indulge me while I interpret.

She is obviously angry. That anger is real and her reasons are understandable even if it's treading ground we already covered. She's been waiting for this particular catharsis and she's happy to go for it now that she has the chance. But if she DID grow to care for Lion-O, at least on SOME level, that's more interesting to me than it all being a lie

Like I said way back in her first episodes, she met the man she'd assigned all her rage to, and he listened to her, he took responsibility for his negligence, and he was endlessly kind even when she was hostile. You can easily have that genuinely affect her.

Not necessarily “In Love With The Mark”, but not as cut and dried as it looks in this moment, either. Maybe she doesn't even realize it until after this is all said and done. Just a seed of doubt and dissatisfaction. She's angry, but she's also being used.

I also think it’d be really interesting to view it as like a devil’s bargain kind of thing. Yeah, she gets to live and have some revenge on the people she died angry at, but at the cost of helping the monster actually responsible for her death ruin more innocent lives. Is that worth it?

If we assume that the side we saw of her that cares about injustice and the plight of the helpless was real, which I think still fits, then that’s another reason for her to maybe not be okay with where she’s ended up now that she’s here. Careful what you wish for, and all.

If it were up to me, going forward Pumyra would grow torn between anger and conscience, struggling internally, and Lion-O would catch on and save her against all reason yet again. We'd essentially follow through on the arc they already had, but for real and on a grander scale.

Like, remember, what we're finding out now is basically the same as what Pumyra was initially presented with, just moreso. So I think that same trajectory they seemed to be on can still work, as long as you scale it up to match.

And Lion-O CAN help her. He himself went through an all-consuming rage and desire for revenge in Ramlak Rising, which is the exact time Pumyra died. You could tie back to that, how his rage begot her rage, and how he can actually understand her better than she thinks. They both fell into the same trap, but now he can offer her a hand out of it.

I’d also give Pumyra her own character arc reevaluating herself and eventually choosing to join the Thundercats for real. She'd struggle with a complicated tangle of love and hate, and through a personal journey eventually choose love. I think that fits the themes of the show.

Lion-O showed kindness to a lizard, and was repaid with an escape that enabled him to go on this entire journey. He helps those in need wherever he goes, and they in turn help him. Tygra broke the curse on the tiger clan by accepting his bio dad. This is a show about love and compassion and kindness being powerful.

Mumm-Ra's idea in planting Pumyra as a mole was “your emotions will be your undoing” or some such, so I’d find it thematically right to turn that back on him with the power of love winning after all. Like, it would take WORK, but I think it’d be worth it.

And I know none of that was the intent, but this liveblog is about my personal feelings and that’s how I feel. I’m not usually one to advocate for Enemies to Lovers when it’s not actually in the text, but godDAMN, they put in the work.

I don't want to give up on Lion-O/Pumyra or on Pumyra as the character I grew to love, so that’s the biased lens I view this twist through. But hey, one benefit of the show never being finished is that I'm free to write my own storyline and no one can stop me. Which is why that's exactly what I do in my art and my writing.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

[langernameohnebedeutung]

The more I catch up on the comics, the more I feel like Marvel's scrambling attempts to re-retcon the great Maximoff retcon, the more they write themselves in a corner and that it would be way easier to either find a plot reason why the twins are Magneto's biological kids again OR go full Word of God that the first retcon is to be ignored (or just...say nothing and pretend it never happened) OR...just go on as is and accept that fans will ignore the retcon anyway.

Because the way things are going now, they really limit the ways the characters can act and feel about each other to do the heavy lifting. Back when the connection between Magneto and the twins was biological, that fact was unchangeable but all the characters involved were free to deal with this fact in ways that made sense and that would show and develop their characters (always depending, of course, on the writers who handled it). The characters could feel and act in ways that made sense and that told us where they were currently at with each other.

But the current plan is...what? There is NEITHER a biological connection NOR did the twins grow up with Magneto NOR did they really build that kind of family dynamic when they finally met. But since Marvel wants to retcon the retcon without committing fully to erasing that storyline, they have to have the characters want to be family. They are no longer free to act how they please - because otherwise, it doesn't work. So Wanda has to want to see Magneto as a father figure again and you also get this -

-implying that Pietro, too, would be willing to play along with this (because that's Marvel's plan now, bc they know how unpopular and nonsensical the retcon was) but why? What changed? How does any of this undo the history between the two of them? And what did I miss, why would they suddenly reconcile now? Because of Trial of Magneto and because Mags didn't actually kill Wanda?

This is just way too convoluted and forced and inauthentic and it's all for some stupid petty copyright war and not to be lofty, but this wouldn't have happened if big corporations weren't messing with creative works for maximum output

[the-music-maniac]

You ever notice how similar Xie Wang and Han Ying’s stories and character arcs are?

A warning here that this contains spoilers for all of Word of Honor/Shan He Ling. Stop reading now, I reference a ton of shit.

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I was actually discussing a couple fic ideas with a friend a few weeks ago, and I got to wondering after thinking about those parallels I could see -

Does Han Ying x Xie Wang exist as a ship?? Is that a thing?? That exists?? Can it please exist??

It has so much potential. There's so many narrative parallels with these two characters.

They're two people who deserved better than their respective endings, who never got what they wanted, because of the manipulation of men who wanted power and would stop at nothing to get it (Jin Wang and Zhao Jing). The manipulation of those who saw them as less then what they were.

They also have similarities in their relationships with their "mentor figures" - Han Ying and Zhou Zishu, and Xie Wang and Zhao Jing. They have quite a lot of differences too, enough that their lives parallel each other instead of mirror, and I just think that their personal experiences could make for a very compelling storyline if these two were to interact. It would be an interesting road to a development of a potential relationship, and moreover an opportunity for both of them to learn from the other and heal.

And real talk? I just want the both of them to be happy tbh (and of course that obviously doesn't need to involve a romantic relationship - I just have no self control. I'd be just as ecstatic about a really good friendship though).

I also know they never interact in the drama - but then again these two are also literally dead in the drama. Reality is what you make it 🤣🤣. And considering how close the Scorpion was working with Tian Chuang - honestly I'm pretty sure you can't really say they haven't met either.

So anyways, I guess reasons why I think this would be a good ship dynamic:

First of all, their relations with their mentors and how it's similar to each other and also not. The resulting potential for mutual support:

Han Ying's dearest wish is to be a disciple of Zhou Zishu's, as he says plainly in that one episode.

The thing is, there could be quite a lot of subtext taken from that - I've read interpretations that he's in love with Zhou Zishu, or at least has romantic feelings for him - a strong crush possibly - which I can plausibly see (I can also see it just being platonic, which I will talk about later). But yeah, a romantic interpretation just because of how strong his devotion towards Zhou Zishu is. The wistful looks?????

In that kind of situation, IF the romantic feelings are two-sided instead of one-sided - which I would like to go on the record and say that with Han Ying and Zhou Zishu, I don't believe it is - and as a result actually becomes something, that type of relationship would not be the most healthy, because there's a very strong imbalance of power. Even if the mentor figure genuinely cares and actively minds the mentee's feelings - the mentee still undeniably has that level of hero worship - it won't ever be equal. We can see that already in Han Ying's case, Zhou Zishu repeatedly tells him to stop treating him with so much formality because he's not the leader anymore and yet Han Ying still remains deferential.

In that interpretation, if that were the case of it being two sided - Han Ying would have quite a lot of similarity of experience to Xie Wang's relation to Zhao Jing -

And here I can talk about how Xie Wang and Zhao Jing's relationship is uh. Kinda sus tbh. Like. That doesn't look like a healthy or platonic father-son relationship and it gives me the creeps. In Xie Wang and Zhao Jing's relationship, I'm more inclined to believe there's some semi-incestous yifu fucking going on than anything platonic, there's just so many sus moments - and if I'm not mistaken they dubbed over a line in the show where it was basically stated plainly that it's not a platonic relationship. Or at least - Xie Wang doesn't view Zhao Jing platonically (and I don't believe Zhao Jing discourages it at all, if anything he actively encourages and guides it to make Xie Wang dependent on him). So we got another setup where it's potentially one sided romantic feelings/hero worship. Or maybe two sided for them, who knows.

But the thing is, while I talked about unhealthy romantic relationships in my section about Han Ying, a fundamental difference between Xie Wang and Han Ying's relationships with their mentors is that Zhou Zishu's relationship with Han Ying would be a lot healthier. A LOT healthier. So much fucking healthier, I cannot emphasis that enough. And that's mostly because their relationship is not two-sided, and because he sees Han Ying as a person.

He cares about Han Ying a lot but not as anything beyond platonic - he views him as a student and a subordinate and protects him as such. Han Ying on the other hand could have romantic feelings for Zhou Zishu. Not in love per se, it feels to me like it could be a mix of a really strong crush with really strong hero worship. I don't think Han Ying truly knows Zhou Zishu's other aspects of personality (yet?? I guess because if we're gonna hypothetically bring both Han Ying and Xie Wang back to life he probably will eventually get to know Zhou Zishu properly), because I doubt he ever showed anything beyond his stern assassin leader type of persona to his subordinates. He was likely caring yes, but in a way that keeps people at a distance. So, a mentor-mentee type of relationship where Han Ying could be crushing quite hard on Zhou Zishu. But still a healthy one, as Zhou Zishu, one - doesn't intend to pursue a romantic relationship with Han Ying - and moreover, although might know about his feelings, or his devotion at least(tbh you'd have to be blind not to), he treats them, and him, with respect. He doesn't try and manipulate Han Ying, or use his emotions for his own purposes. He sees Han Ying as his own person. His affection and regards towards Han Ying remains unconditional, even if Han Ying messes up or doesn't follow instructions. Instructions that, btw, repeatedly try to keep Han Ying out of the line of fire, and makes it clear that Han Ying is to put himself first.

Everything Zhao Jing does however is solely to cripple Xie Wang and make him wholly dependent on him. He's been grooming Xie Wang from such a young age, and his positive regard and care is ALWAYS conditional. As soon as Xie Wang messes up, he takes it away as punishment, and because of how Zhao Jing's made himself the center of Xie Wang's world, that action is devastating to him. He subtly encourages and toys with Xie Wang's regard for him for his own purposes, he tries to make Xie Wang jealous so he works twice as hard to earn back Zhao Jing's attention. And as we see with his intention to eventually discard Xie Wang as soon as he is no longer useful - he doesn't view Xie Wang as a person. He's merely another tool in his arsenal.

The reason why I wrote such a long ass analysis about the similarities and differences between Xie Wang and Han Ying's relationships is because as I mentioned before, one reason I think this would be a pretty interesting ship and dynamic is how these two could help each other. At first, it might be more Han Ying helping Xie Wang.

Xie Wang hasn't ever experienced what a proper and healthy guardian type relationship is like, or even what it means for someone to choose him first. He's a victim of abuse, and should he manage to survive the avalanche at the end of the show, there is potential for him to start to undo all the damage that Zhao Jing has inflicted on him all those years, especially if the man is truly no longer around. And I think Han Ying would be in a very good position to offer him support in that journey. Moreover, if Han Ying has had an experience similar to that, it could be the reason he would want to offer support to Xie Wang. He's experienced a lot of what Xie Wang has experienced, but he's also seen what it is for someone to genuinely care about him, and as a result likely has a more healthy view on that type of relationship. They're similar enough for Xie Wang to potentially not want to push Han Ying away if he ever offers his help, but also dissimilar enough that Han Ying could offer new avenues of thought.

At the same time, if you just read Han Ying and Zhou Zishu's relationship as a really strong type of hero worship, this dynamic could make sense too. Han Ying clearly looks up to Zhou Zishu quite a lot, and on top of that, Zhou Zishu in a way represents everything Han Ying has wanted and couldn't have - aka a family and a mentor figure and a home to call his own. Regardless of if it's purely platonic or not, it's still an infinitely healthier relationship, a parallel to Xie Wang's experience, so the potential of the offer of support remains the same.

Second of all, similarity in origin and life experiences, which is a small thing tbh but still an important thing:

Han Ying is someone I don't know a lot of background on tbh - I presume he doesn't have a family anymore, and somehow ended up in the Window of Heaven. I've read fics where Zhou Zishu was the one to save him at some point and offer him a position in the assassin group, and I'm inclined to take that as a plausible head canon (unless it's actually canon, idk I haven't read tyk yet).

So, in bare bones, he's an orphan who is taken in by a mentor figure, and becomes a high ranking member of an assassin group.

Xie Wang is also someone who no longer has a family - we don't know that much about his background either, but I presume he was happened upon by Zhao Jing in some way - I'm not sure at what age tbh, is it assumed that he was raised by him?? Or maybe in teenage years??

Whatever it happens to be, Xie Wang was taken in, maybe even "saved" by (although if you ask me, he'd be better off without) Zhao Jing.

So in essence it is the same thing as Han Ying's experiences, an orphan who is taken in by a mentor figure, and becomes a high ranking (or the leader of) an assassin group.

And not only that, as I mentioned from the beginning, these two both realize and know, eventually, that they’re being used by men who are desperate for power (Jin Wang, Zhao Jing).

I mention this actually as just an extension of my first point, because while I mentioned that Han Ying very obviously can support Xie Wang in that particular “past grooming and abuse” aspect, there are probably still many hidden traumas and scars for these two from the lives they’ve both lead. Their similar experiences lead to similar choices which helped shape who they are, and as a result, I think these two could truly understand each other and where they’re coming from.

Their personalities would fit pretty well with each other. I think:

I don’t know if my interpretation on how these two are is accurate tbh, so feel free to let me know if you think it’s out of character.

To me, Han Ying seems like someone who would be pretty calm around the people he cares about; responsible, smart, eager to learn, with a steady sort of presence. He seems like someone who would wear their heart on their sleeve around people he trusts too, but not in any overtly obvious way. I think the reason why I get that impression is that, upon rewatch, I could plainly see his worry about Zhou Zishu in episode one, but when I first started the show, I somehow missed it entirely. Han Ying also didn’t show any qualms about admitting to Chengling that he wants to be Zhou Zishu’s disciple - which can be a very personal piece of info. The way he was around Zhou Zishu, and Wen Kexing also gave off an air of innocent eagerness to do well in his accomplishments and for approval. I’m not saying he’s always like this, because I’m rather certain he has a darker side too - as we see with all the characters, no one is without their traumas and no one is without artifice or without complexity. They’re all grey moral in a very human way, and Han Ying is no different. We’ve seen before too that once he’s got his game face on, the man is pretty competent and also ruthless (his conversation with Gao Chong for example) - I don’t think he could be any less if he’s that high up in the Tianchuang hierarchy. But at the same time I can also see him being a bit of a very subtle disaster (almost?? Slightly dorky??) in certain situations, and we can see that kind of peek through when Zhou Zishu and Wen Kexing hijacked his kidnapping attempt and he was kind of like uhh. Okay so, I’m in a choke hold, I think that might be my former commander, so like. Let them go. It’s actually really funny cause while Wen Kexing was telling Gao Chong and Chengling to hurry up and leave, I swear you could see Han Ying contemplating his entire life.

The face of a man confuzzled.

Xie Wang on the other hand, is someone that’s more impulsive, liable to push or be mischievous, less of a steady personality and more like - for lack of better word - an absolute gremlin. A pretty murderous one. It’s a bit hard to tell all aspects of how Xie Wang is tbh, since he has many different mannerisms while talking to different people. With Zhao Jing he has a very subservient, almost dutiful, childlike and innocent air about him, and a sort of. Sa jiao (撒娇) type of demeanor. He craves approval from Zhao Jing, and is just generally very baby around him, and I’m really not sure how much of that is how he actually is and how much of that is him learning that this is the best way to get Zhao Jing’s attention. And tbh I don’t think all of that is grooming, I think Xie Wang probably does have the potential to be as soft or as innocently childlike and happy with others he cares about (just hopefully in a lot healthier way). I think we see his soft side a little with Qianqiao when he gives her the cure. Despite that though, we can still see other aspects of him surface. He makes suggestions and pushes when he thinks Zhao Jing’s refusals are unreasonable, he just goes and does his own thing sometimes (um usually murderous things. Like when he killed Song Huai Ren and told Zhao Jing he’s a traitor). He’s mischievous about some of his actions (after literally stabbing a man, ‘what? he said I should kill him if I have the ability’). He’s a lot more obviously gritty and aggressive and morally grey than Han Ying appears, which I think adds dimension to his character when added in with everything else. He’s also very smart, competent, ruthless - obviously since he runs the Scorpion, but he’s surprisingly fair and almost? Honourable? In certain aspects? And like Han Ying, he does somewhat wear his heart on his sleeve, retains that eagerness to do well and is somehow not as jaded as he could be, as he still finds the capacity to eventually care for a stranger (Liu Qianqiao). 

I may be oversimplifying how these two could be, but with their personality types I think they have a lot of potential both in a romantic relationship or as close friends. And in a way that at first glance would probably be puzzling - how in the hell did these two become friends/get together (lmao you’ll see Han Ying in his rather sensible disciple robes and then Xie Wang is just there in his braids, dramatic black outfits, winged eyeliner, etc. 🤣🤣😅😅) but on closer thought, makes sense. Han Ying could be a more steadying presence for Xie Wang, and Xie Wang in turn could help him loosen up a bit more. (That’s kind of oversimplifying it but it’s 5 am where I am rn and I’m too tired to elaborate) I also believe Xie Wang might push Han Ying to be more ambitious, be able to do things for himself more - because Xie Wang went through a process of, everything I do is for someone else, until I realized they were using me, and now I’m going to do it for myself. In that way they could potentially push each other to higher heights in what they do, and they are pretty similar in ideology and morals and previous actions. They both have blood on their hands, and they’re not afraid to be ruthless or do what’s necessary to get the job done. They have their traumas, their complexities and an understanding of what it’s like to put on masks for different people.

The potential for found family. All the found family. Gimme:

This one I feel like is more obvious and changes some things about canon, but the timeline I imagine for if Xie Wang x Han Ying would be a plausible ship is one where Han Ying survives the stealing of the fake glazed armour incident and becomes one of the disciples of Siji (second disciple of the sixth generation????). Everything else would likely proceed in a very similar way (although in this au in my mind Gu Xiang and Cao Weining are alive). And then during the avalanche incident, with WenZhou trapped in the armoury, Xie Wang ends up surviving and they end up finding him somehow.

Whether or not it’d be out of character for WenZhou to save him I think could be explored, but the bottom line is that eventually they would probably take him back to Siji. There, whether him meeting Han Ying goes smoothly or not is up to interpretation - I very much doubt it would be an amiable meeting tbh - in fact I fully imagine it to be antagonistic af at first, considering what opposing groups they used to be a part of and the knowledge of how deadly the other can be - trust would be hard to come by, which makes a slow development all the more interesting. And moreover them becoming friends or dating would likely help Xie Wang into the dynamic at Siji because now there’s a more tangible connection between him and the place, and I can see while he’s getting to know all the people of Siji, eventually thinking of them as family as well.  And Han Ying in turn gets another person who cares about him, and for him to care about.

I’ll be honest here and say that I don’t particularly care at this point how realistic or in character it all would be -  I need found family in my life I have no self control. Xie Wang and Han Ying my beloveds needs all the good things.

Another possible meeting is just Han Ying being sent to negotiate with the Scorpions instead of Duan Pengju (is that how it went? I’ll admit I’m a little fuzzy on plot points here) and meeting each other that way. There could be moments of understanding while working together, an inevitable kinda separation, and eventually seeing each other again at Siji, after all the shitshow is over. The development could continue from there.

The closer age gap:

I’d like to preface this part with a disclaimer that I’m not trying to bash any other ships that are out there, this is actually just entirely my personal preference.

I don’t really like big age gaps in my ships unless their both established adults - for example in their 30's 40's, even 50's. Even if one of them remains young in body, it’s just not a dynamic I generally like. The most popular ship that comes to mind here is Ye Baiyi x Xie Wang - and all the more power to you if you do ship it tbh, I can see it being really adorable and healing for the both of them, especially since Ye Baiyi never really gets a happy ending either (and he absolutely deserves one 😤😤😤) - but that as a ship dynamic is personally not for me, especially after Xie Wang’s kinda hinted relationship with another man that’s also older than him. Ye Baiyi obviously is ten million times the man Zhao Jing could ever be, and it would be an infinitely healthier relationship anyway, but yeah the age gap thing is just my personal bias.

So I don’t know, I appreciate that Han Ying and Xie Wang are both closer in age to each other. I know there aren’t confirmed ages (I think?) but if I had to take a guess, I’d say I think both of them are probably in their early to mid twenties.

Anyways, it’s literally 5:43 am now where I am, so I think I’m gonna end this way too long post and pass out. Honestly, I’m not even sure if this thing is coherent anymore, I’m half delirious with exhaustion while writing this. I might possibly write a fic or do something about this Xie Wang x Han Ying ship, I might not, but I just wanted to get it out there. It’s a cute idea.

Oh god my eyeballs are burning. Cheers, goodnight.

[autumnrory]

this is random but I wanted to tell you I enjoy how unapologetically anti steggy/endgame you are. i’ve never bought into that whole love story, because it‘s literally just a couple of interactions with no greater depth to it. when I point out they barely got to know each other people will say ´well in the old days people who barely knew each other got married all the time!’ but that’s just an excuse for poor writing, cause i hear this same excuse in other fandoms to defend every boring het ship that barely talks to each other....we’re a modern audience and we deserve better than that kind of lazy writing. a relationship without genuine development is not going to connect and will only fall flat when there are clearly better options.....(anyways sorry for coming into your inbox to rant, i‘m just a casual fan who sometimes has opinions)

thank you haha i know i repeat myself a lot but it's just bc i'm so mad!!! and every once in a while i will be like AND ANOTHER THING that shows why it's all bad and illogical for the characters

yeah and it's such a silly argument because......sure things were like that back then, where if he'd not crashed into the ice, they might've gotten married real fast, but that's not how things happened? and sure, steve grew up in that world, but by endgame he'd lived a long time in a world where that's just not the norm. and as i've said, even if you DO believe steve and peggy had known each other enough to have fallen in love, he had moved past that relationship. like basically the entire point of catws is showing him moving forward and making a life in this century, even if he is (naturally) struggling with it. i think part of the reason buy into it is because 1. endgame hit them over the head with the peggy references to be like see! he loves her so much! when they just did that to convince the audience it was believable, because looking at previous movies, the endgame ending is decidedly NOT believable. and 2. because age of ultron basically ignores catws entirely so people see all the discussion of family and a normal life and steve's nightmare scenario but instead they don't recognize it as a nightmare scenario and don't recognize that he's not the same person he was in the forties. like. i don't think joss whedon was TRYING to prove anything because avengers 2012 really shows he just doesn't understand steve's character at all and just views him as an old man even though he's like 26, BUT i think ppl just misinterpret things from aou to be like "this is the life he's always wanted actually! he finally gets to have it!" when it's all just unhealthy and not at all true of steve's character

not to be all "you're not a real fan if" but i just think it's not that ppl who liked the endgame ending don't really like steve, i just think they don't really GET steve

in fairness i think a lot of marvel fans pretty clearly don't care that much if the relationships don't have a lot of depth, because let's face it, a lot of the canon romantic relationships don't AND a lot of the supposed friendships don't - for example, people think civil war was this tragedy with this fight between steve and tony, but let's face it, they were never close friends, they didn't get along from the start, if not for joss whedon i imagine avengers 2 would've shown a better dynamic between the whole team, but we get the nice party scene at the beginning and then it's back to their regular arguing (which hey creating ultron WAS tony's fault so like. it should've been called out lmao!). but yeah, like. i get that marvel is supposed to be fun and not that deep or whatever, BUT they have their emotional instances and near-criticisms of government (i mean........the whole point of catws is that they cannot be trusted! and people think steve should've signed the accords! yeah right!) and then they just don't follow through and especially recently, and ESPECIALLY with endgame, they chose not to follow through on anything they'd built up to that point (look how it ignored catws, aou, civil war, infinity war, ragnarok, it contradicts all those movies), they chose to go for the exact kind of garbage superhero movies are accused of being, instead of telling a cohesive story. it's embarrassing.

but yeah like you really have to think that steve probably knew old peggy better than he knew peggy during in the forties.....so how do they think it's acceptable or logical for him to know about the life she had, to know she wanted him to have his own life and to go back, ignoring all that. not even getting into what it does to his friends, what it means to have all this knowledge of the future and whether or not he would mold the timeline into something else. it all just specifically makes steve's character look bad in pretty much all regards and he would just......never do a single thing he did in endgame. he would not have sat around and not tried to do something to undo the snap or at least help out his remaining teammates for FIVE YEARS he just wouldn't. that's why for me i have to ignore the whole movie, not just the ending.

[bigskydreaming]

Small response ask to that anon who brought up Chris Priest and your response of DC should focus less on Bruce being abusive to his kids. Not sure if you noticed the up and down of the Batman comics but it seems the arc that have him being a caring dad has less asshole dad and abusive dad in them and yet the arc that have Bruce hitting the boys or kicking them out of the house has Bruce not acknowledging the boys as his sons and even the writers say Dick is more of a brother of partner than son.

Oh for sure, its absolutely true that a huge part of the problem with the Batman comics is the sheer inconsistency in writer visions of the characters - which is why IMO its up to DC’s editorial staff to maintain internal consistency for how the characters officially relate to each other at the very least. 

Like I’ve said before, you can’t roll back the clock on them being his kids once you’ve established they’re his kids. People haven’t forgotten that Tim was adopted by Bruce in the old continuity just because they decided to have his parents alive in the New 52 - and ‘teenage kinda sorta ally’ is an inherently weaker emotional tether compared to ‘actual adopted son’ so when presented with two options, most people aren’t going to give a shit about their attempt to ‘unbond’ a character from their actual parent and will stick with viewing them as father and son, whether DC likes it or not.

So its just plain foolishness IMO for DC to attempt to apply any sort of ambiguity to Bruce and his kids. Along with his biological son Damian, Dick, Jason, Tim and Cass at least have all been officially adopted by Bruce (or in Cass’ case, they were stated to be starting adoption proceedings last we saw before the Reboot). Like....those are just hard facts, no matter how much people try and ‘undo’ that if they don’t personally like the idea of Bruce as a father of five....fans are not going to cooperate and its just sheer stubbornness to pretend otherwise. People before the current writers and editors made a creative choice to have Bruce adopt these kids. Readers liked it. Readers know what they like and once given the option of having Bruce the father of five, you can protest all you want as the ‘official’ overseers of Batman, but you can’t erase what was already written, and you can’t ask readers to forget they liked something better than how you’re currently trying to push it.

But that’s just me being like hey DC what if you weren’t a flock of fucking dumbasses, just to try something different for a change.

And related to your ask, there’s absolutely a direct correlation in my mind between the DC writers who intensely dislike the idea of Bruce as a father and writing him as being callous, insensitive, aloof and outright abusive with various of his kids. Because it all goes hand in hand with them - they dislike the idea of Bruce as a dad because they’re all about him being the brooding lone wolf whose entire life is just an endless pursuit of justice for the sake of others because he’s convinced himself that he can never be happy and shouldn’t try. YAWN. But this view of Bruce is outright threatened by the warm, caring father Bruce rendition, so they try and erode the latter as much as possible in pursuit of the former....

Only to later have writers revert to the latter and erode the former.

And around and around and around we go. And they all keep trying to reset things that fundamentally CAN NOT BE RESET because this is the problem when you staff a creative industry top to bottom with fanboys who can’t and won’t separate their personal desires from their professional shepherding of these IPs. And so each new crop of writers tries to write Batman and related characters the way they like them, most often the way they remembered reading them as kids through the lens filter of nostalgia, and thus Bruce’s kids’ status flip flops either officially or unofficially every five to ten years, Hal Jordan is replaced by Kyle Rayner is replaced by Hal Jordan and a wave of new diverse characters are created in the span of a couple years and ten years later no one’s heard of any of them except for Jaime Reyes.

And its the reason IMO that superhero comics have never grown beyond a niche industry despite the VAST appeal of superheroes that superhero movies have proven still exists....and its why superhero movies will end up in the exact same stagnated niche if they don’t learn from the former’s mistake and let their characters grow and age and be replaced by new ones rather than just rebooted versions of the old one, because there’s only so many times you can go round and round on the merry go round before people just flat out stop caring because you’re not doing or saying anything new.

Change is good, except for when people refuse to let it happen because they’ve settled for what they know as being the optimal plateau, never to truly be reached past because the unknown and untested is scary and might bite.

Anyway. All of that is to say yes, I agree, and as a PS I just have to froth at the mouth a little on a personal note because god do I hate the interpretation that Bruce and Dick are more like brothers than father and son, lololol, and can’t refrain from mentioning that any time its brought up even in passing. 

(This is totally not directed at you btw, just the concept itself, lololol, sorry). 

People can talk about the smaller age gap between them all they want, but the fact of the matter is, Dick isn’t Damian, and the relationship between Dick and Bruce has NEVER been nearly as ambiguous or as open to interpretation as the one between Dick and Damian.

Because the contrast between the two is Bruce had something that nobody who is just an older sibling has over a younger....absolute uncontested parental authority, total responsibility for his education, living arrangements, emotional development, etc....with no other comparable figure in the younger’s life occupying a same or even similar role. Dick occupied that role for Damian for about a year of his life, but Bruce has occupied that role for Dick every single year since his first parents died. It might have taken awhile for them to individually and together VIEW their dynamic as parent and child, but from the moment Dick stepped foot into Wayne Manor, Bruce started out day one as someone who stepped into the role of sole guardian and caretaker with no prior emotional attachment.....and that just is NOT a sibling. That’s a legal guardian or parent.

(And yes, Alfred was there of course, but despite being viewed as a father figure to Bruce himself, Alfred never ever ever once has been shown to occupy an equal position to Bruce in Dick’s life....he’s very firmly slotted into the grandfather role himself, and has never stepped forward to definitively intercede between the two of them or usurp or even truly challenge Bruce’s parental authority of Dick).

If people want to say that at times Dick and Bruce’s dynamic has been more relaxed and they’ve related to each other as more like siblings than parent and child due to the relatively small age gap between them (still well over a decade, like yeah Bruce would have had to have been fourteen or so to have Dick himself, but the point is he DIDN’T, and he was already completely done with education and globe-trotting and was firmly established in his life and life’s purpose by the time he became Dick’s guardian, so the small age gap is not quite as influential as I think some people try to make it out to be - the reality is the Bruce that Dick met as a child couldn’t be any more decisively in the ‘adult/equivalent of a parent’ category in Dick’s eyes if he were five years older....it wouldn’t have changed a single thing about their actual situation or the positioning of their dynamic.)

But anyway, my point just being that yeah, due to the relatively small age gap between them, I can see people making a case for them at times enjoying a more relaxed camaraderie more akin to brothers than father and son, but the part that’s a pet peeve is when people try and outright replace the idea of them having a father/son dynamic with one where they’re brothers and partners and equals because.....no. Bruce always had full authority and guardianship of Dick from the day he met him, and he’s never been anyone BUT the figure who occupies that role in Dick’s mind, no matter whether the name for that changed over time. And that’s not a sibling, because even siblings who end up raising their younger siblings after the death of their parents, say....except for extreme cases like Dick and Damian, they usually still already have prior connection and perceptions of each other....like the younger, if already Dick’s age when raised by someone Bruce’s age....like, if they were siblings and Bruce ended up raising Dick himself, Dick would still have an image in his mind of a time before their mutual parents died, before he shifted into that parent role....and thus there’d be some ambiguity. 

But like I said, Bruce always (and without exception or alternative) from day one existed as the one responsible for Dick’s care, the one responsible for raising him, the one who got the ultimate say in every aspect of his life from education to what he ate to whether he could go hang out with his friends...and call that whatever you want, but that’s a parent. Not an older brother.

And more importantly, that dynamic between parent and child, rather than between older and younger sibling, is never going to fully shift into true equals. There’s a degree to which our parents will always be our parents and exist on a different footing than us in our mutual perspectives. There’s no getting around that. And Dick will never ever be positioned to be Bruce’s brother-figure rather than his son. Never someone who can challenge Bruce on ACTUAL equal footing rather than always with the vestiges of ‘this is the man who raised me’ and ‘I raised this man’ hanging over them. 

Anyway, like I said, pet peeve, and I always get a little grrr about people suggesting they’re more brother and brother than father and son because its disingenuous in my mind....there’s never been any kind of reality to it. And more importantly, its one of those things that only really seems to serve one purpose - and that’s to lessen Bruce’s responsibility to Dick, because if they’re just brothers, then the times when Bruce has done less than stellar as his parent, let’s say - like, those aren’t as big a deal or big a failing or an injustice to Dick if Bruce is JUST his brother and not actually his father and thus not actually responsible for filling that role.

Its the exact flip side of why I argue that its shitty to heap the kind of expectations on Dick that fandom usually does....because he’s NOT Damian’s father or any of his siblings.....but the key point I always bring up there is that this is more than just a matter of labels, but rather due to the fact that someone with significantly more and undeniable parental authority than Dick exists for all of his siblings....Bruce himself.

And that’s why Dick will never truly be Bruce’s equal within the family rather than his son - he doesn’t carry equivalent power even if equivalent expectations or responsibilities are heaped on him. And that’s why Bruce will never truly be Dick’s equal rather than his parent - because from day one, he DID carry sole parental power and responsibility for Dick. And there’s no getting around that and no changing that.....unless you CLAIM that Bruce is ‘just’ Dick’s brother DESPITE all the evidence of him being the only parent Dick’s had since he was eight years old.

And the other thing that bugs about the Bruce is more Dick’s brother than parent thing....even if Alfred has never officially been designated Bruce’s father, there’s never been any doubt that they are far more a parent/child dynamic than an older brother/younger brother. And all of Dick’s siblings have unequivocally been interpreted as Bruce’s children.

So.....

According to the Bruce is more Dick’s brother than parent argument, Dick is the one and only member of the Batfamily who just....doesn’t get to have a parent figure after he loses his parents at age eight? He never needs or wants one after that point? Bruce is more kinda just his brother and partner and Dick wants it this way, because he loved his parents, and so the eight years he got with them was all the parental love and guidance he needed, he was all set, no need or desire for any more after that point, because that’s how it works, apparently, if you love your parents and they die while you’re still a kid, sorry but you can’t have new ones? You can have a guardian but not another parent, you already filled the ‘I had parents who loved me’ quota so whether you only got eight years with them or eighteen, that’s all folks, but its okay because its not like you’d even want parents again if you had even just eight years with ones already?

LOLOL.

Yeah. 

DISLIKE.

[ks-caster]

It’s Like Watching Fanfiction – An (Un)Necessarily Long Critique of The 100 Seasons 6 and 7

Ah, the familiar cry of the content-starved fan, particularly as our favorite shows descend into the depths of mischaracterization, unexpected ships, hiatus, abrupt cancellation and shock-value death endings. I’ve said it myself about so many of my shows, while wanting to spend some time watching the characters but not wanting to re-hash episodes I’ve nearly memorized: “I wish I could just watch fanfiction!”

But the further into seasons 6 and 7 I’ve gotten, the more I’ve come to realize that my dream of having new and exciting possibilities for the characters come miraculously to a screen near me wouldn’t be the pleasant experience I’d imagined.

Now, depending on the type of ending you like – hopeful but with a lot of lose ends left to your imagination, or bittersweet but more definite, you could consider either seasons 1-4 or 1-5 their own complete stories.

Both seasons 4 and 5 ended in a way that suggested an unknown but likely positive future. They could have been considered conclusions for the main characters’ developmental arcs, and while season 5 went a little off the rails in terms of offscreen character development and sudden new characters, they both stayed fairly close to the original concept: survivors living in the ruins of the apocalypse. All four (or five) seasons emphasized the importance of the found family dynamic (although those dynamics shifted radically in season 5 due to the time-skip, they remained an important source of character motivation).

But seasons 6 and 7? Those feel like I’m watching fanfiction. And I don’t love it.

A story told on a whole new planet with a new environment, culture and cast of original characters was always going to feel like an AU – it sort of is, no matter how you swing it. If that was all that had changed, then I think the story would still feel cohesive.

If it weren’t for the timey whimey bullshit.

Now, fun fact: when reading fanfiction, I love time travel stories. I haven’t posted any myself but I’ve sought out and read them voraciously, for every fandom I’m in. I love the idea of characters meeting themselves or their friends at radically different ages, plot points and levels of experience and the way that changes things for both groups. (Yes, I’m also a Whovian if that wasn’t blatantly obvious). I also love a good amnesia arc. And I DID think that the Josephine/Clarke body possession thing was pretty cool.

So why did season 6 and most* of season 7 fall as flat for me as they did?

The simple fact is that some things – and characters’ emotional dynamics are one of those things – are so much easier to get across in writing than on screen. A good actor can make us feel the character’s emotions, but unless the film goes full-on Clarke’s mind space, we can’t really know what they’re thinking in individual moments. For the most part film as a genre has ways around this, but if it’s mishandled, then the emotional beats come off all wrong. (See for reference Tony Stark’s funeral where half the actors didn’t know what was going on due to Disney’s spoiler fears.)

If you’re going to include time skips in which things have happened and character dynamics have changed, you cannot handle it wrong.

Which brings us back to seasons 6 and (so far) 7 of The 100. So far to date we’ve had all of this occur either offscreen or asynchronously enough to be confusing to an audience watching the episodes in real time:

Jordan’s entire life prior to meeting Napkru in the waking world

Octavia’s character development while living on Skyring with the Diyozas

Hope’s first 22 years of life, on Skyring and (I presume) Bardo

Echo, Hope and Gabriel living on Skyring for 5 years with Orlando

Going back a little further, we also have the season 5 timeskip, which brought us Spacekru as found family, Clarke adopting tiny!heda, and Octavia building Wonkru. Now season 5 took care to show us Wonkru flashbacks and dedicate time to show Spacekru and the Griffin family loving on each other, making inside jokes etc. But it was still incredibly jarring for the audience in a lot of ways, because at the end of the day, we’ve spent four years with the character dynamics and development doing one thing, and no amount of telling us that they’ve had 6 years to do another thing while our time with them only lasted about one year in comparison is ever going to undo the importance of “show don’t tell.”

Let’s take Bellarkers’ beef with Becho for example. (Disclaimer: Since I don’t really have a strong opinion either way on the popular Bellamy ships, I hope that I’m representing what I’ve read from other people accurately.)

I understand cognitively that Bellamy and Clarke knew each other for one year (during which they were in a lot of intense situations that really didn’t leave them the emotional space to figure out how they felt about each other outside of “I don’t want to lose this person”) and Bellamy and Echo knew each other for seven years (six of which they had plenty of low-stress time to get to know each other, grow and mature side-by-side, etc.).

But that doesn’t compute on an emotional level when I as a watcher went straight from watching Bellamy and Raven tearfully eulogizing Clarke on the ring, to him turning up with a coffee mug and a plucky attitude to rescue her the second he finds out she’s alive and in trouble. I don’t think that could compute emotionally for me without having spent the last few years watching the dynamics shift and Becho happen. And that was with the writers giving me as a watcher an episode at the end of season 4 where Bellamy stops Echo from killing herself and connects with her on an emotional level, and then one at the beginning of season 5 where we got to see the spacekru dynamics, including them being together.

So we’re watching this show, many of us for the found family character relationships (god knows it’s not for all the positive happy feeling I get from watching *checks notes* ah, yes, characters having to constantly choose who to kill off in a string of increasingly huge and horrible genocides. *Side-eyes my life choices for getting into this fandom in the first place.*) Okay, we’re watching this show for the characters, and between seasons 4 and 5, many of those dynamics radically shift offscreen. Becho is the easiest and probably most talked-about example (well, and the Blake siblings, but the radical change shown in Octavia’s character between 4 and 5 makes that at least a little easier to choke down) but there are plenty of others, take your pick.

Although it makes perfect sense for a lot to change between separated groups of people in a half dozen years, it makes a lot less sense to an audience watching week to week, particularly when the show’s limited amount of screen time was too focused on plot to really delve into those changes and let us see and understand them. That was what made me think that the show was headed into jump the shark territory in season 5, but I really wanted to know what happened to my faves (Octavia, Raven and Memori, to be specific) so I kept watching.

Our fandom’s excellent writers spent the hiatus crafting mid-time-skip vignettes and missing character moments, and I spent the hiatus reading them. And I remember thinking that it would have been great if even a quarter of this content could have been put into the show to ease the audience into the dynamic shifts – but of course they’d never have the screen time to do all of that.

Especially, coming back to the main point, since written fiction allows the audience to see inside the characters’ heads, while television (usually) does not. It’s much easier to write a scene in which, say, two characters who have known each other for 7 years show that they’ve gotten into a relationship some time before the scene, and convince the audience that their relationship is good and healthy and genuine, than it would be to produce one for TV.  

And then we come to seasons 6 and 7 – the 2-part AU longfic, stuffed full of OCs, loosely connected to the “science” of the original show, and heavily reliant on memory-bending time travel as a plot device.

As season 6 airs, the audience hasn’t really had a chance to process all the radical changes from season 5, and already we have a Marper child running around furthering the plot, and Octavia walks into the Green Flash from Pirates of the Caribbean and walks back out with a personality transplant.

Meanwhile, Clarke gets an actual personality transplant, and it takes even the people closest to her a concerningly long time to notice. Now, if I’d read that in a fic, the writer might’ve taken care to remind me as a reader – particularly after a long hiatus between seasons – that with the exception of Madi none of Clarke’s friends have seen her for more than a couple of weeks in 6 years, so them not noticing for a while that she’s behaving strangely isn’t really all that strange. But on TV, I don’t get to see Gaia’s thoughts when Clarke lets Madi go to school despite the danger – Tati Gabrielle’s facial expressions can only do so much to make up the difference. Because the time spent apart was not (and really could not be, based on the structure of the show) properly acknowledged on screen, scenes like that one leave audiences floundering and pointing out bad writing.

Having watched 7x02 The Garden, I think if I went back and watched season 6 after Octavia returns from the Anomaly, her conduct – especially around Bellamy – would make a lot more sense. (That was the plan for this weekend actually – but my damn Wi-Fi conked out…) However at the time it just seemed weird and unnatural. Had it been the only example of off-screen or asynchronous character development, it would have been a lot easier to swallow. However, season 5 happened, meaning both that I was still getting used to all of the new dynamics and that I had a higher standard for Octavia’s off-screen development, because we got enough bunker flashbacks that I felt like I at least understood Blodreina.

What would have made the whole thing make a lot more sense a year ago would have been if the hair and makeup department had made an effort to make her look older, so that we could see time had passed for her. Now, Marie is 33 in real life, and so was the Octavia who figured out that up is down and got Davy Jones Locker to send her back ran out of the Anomaly, so yes, that is what an actual 33-year-old looks like, and the media has distorted my perception of age. But from an audience perspective, I saw an actress playing a 23-year-old go in, and the same actress playing the same 23-year-old come out.

Gabriel pointed out that her hair was longer, but that only accounted for a few months of time. Since she went in looking dirty, wounded and exhausted, and came out clean, healthy and energetic, she could have passed for younger before I would have thought she was older. (In fact, I want to say there was a theory circulating at that time that the Octavia who came out of the Anomaly was actually a younger version of herself, and she was missing memories because she’d never formed them. I don’t remember whose theory this was though. If you know or if it’s your content I’m referencing please feel free to let me know and I’ll edit!)

In addition, the shifting loyalties in Wonkru near the end of season 5 complicated the character situation – in season 6, the majority of Wonkru peeps (lookin’ at you, Miller and Indra) switched over to the commander’s side. While Indra didn’t really have enough screen time to express an opinion about Octavia, Miller was very clear in season 6 that she was anathema now – which although that was probably a semi-reasonable step for his character, it just felt like someone took his Bellamy-and-or-Clarke-following season 1-4 character and popped it into his season 6 costume without taking the time to address the road he took to get there.

Post-lockerAnomaly Octavia had to face and slay her demons. (Grumbles and links the interested reader to this POST from @osleyakomwonkru regarding that horseshit.) Afterwards, she shows a major shift in personality, particularly towards her brother. Because we as the audience wouldn’t see her time on skyring for about year in real time (or learn that she was ten years older and therefore a lot more mature, the chemical changes of which would account for at least some of the difference even if she couldn’t remember anything else) we had no choice but to associate her change with the slaying of Blodreina, which seemed like a ham-fisted way of forcing her a quick and slick redemption arc and prepping The Blake Siblings to go back to being ride-or-die for each other in season 7.

Raven’s season 6 personality was also radically different from her 1-5 development – while I understand her having a remaining beef with Clarke and being emotional due to Shaw’s death (RIP!) the fact that the writing in season 6 reduced her to the nagging shrew trope until they needed her to do a coding deus ex machina just added to the feeling that I was watching someone take the characters around, change them to their own preferences (even if that preference was to push some into the background and make them tools for the B-plot) and toss them into an AU story. Which I could have enjoyed more if I had been reading it and therefore seeing inside the characters’ heads – and if I hadn’t paid for the privilege with ad revenue instead of voluntary clicks of the kudos/like/reblog/comment buttons.

Another issue with time skip relationship is exposition for the lesser known characters’ backstories. Both seasons 6 and 7 have so far had dramatic character mother death reveals that were conveniently not told to their most important people specifically because the appropriate time to tell those stories would have been during the offscreen time skips. I will (grudgingly) accept Echo, an adult making a conscious (and familiar) decision to change up her personality to fit into and survive within her environment, choosing not to tell a traumatic story that reminds her of her past. (She’s my next meta – stay tuned!)

I will not in a million years, however, believe that the Clarke Griffin who I watched for four seasons be set up as the blatantly obvious “compassionate mom-friend protagonist” adopted a traumatized 6-year-old, moved into said child’s village, burned or buried the bodies of everyone who lived there, and never ever brought up the child’s dead birth parents.

No way. The ONLY reason that could have possibly been scripted in that way was because that conversation needed to be there for plot reasons and the appropriate time for it to have been had was during the 6 years they spent off screen. Similarly, while (again) I’ll buy that Echo chose not to talk about her mom’s death with Bellamy before he decided to be a dick about it, I fully believe that the timing of that conversation was only there because if it had occurred on the ring where it would have been more appropriate, the audience would have missed it.

Now, picture this: if the scene with Madi had been in a written fanfic, Clarke could have said “you didn’t lose me,” Madi could have said “I didn’t mean you,” and Clarke could have remembered Madi telling her the story of her birth mom dying in her arms. Then Clarke could have mentally made the decision that she didn’t want Madi to relive that in an attempt to empathize with her, and she makes an effort to convince her that she’s fine. In just 2 or 3 paragraphs a written story could have effectively conveyed both the exposition and the emotional beats of the scene, concluding with Clarke making a (maybe misguided but still sweet) attempt to be a good mom by not dredging that up for Madi (or something – I’m not defending the crappy and inconsistent writing of Clarke’s parenting we’ve on screen so far).

Moving right along, we had a lovely flashback montage of Hope and Dev, which was sufficient to make me (and several of the tumblrs I follow) care about Dev at least enough to be saddened by his death. However, what we didn’t get was a damn crumb of flashback showing Orlando and Anomalykru developing any kind of familial relationship between him agreeing to train them, and whatever dynamic we were supposed to pick up on at the end of that episode. I got a little protective big sister vibe from Echo and Hope but that’s it. They apparently expended their allotment of emotion-inducing flashbacks on the dead guy, and failed entirely to make me give a shit about (as it turned out) the next dead guy.

Now we’re going into an episode with Octavia on (presumably) Bardo in the promo, so I’m guessing we get to see her skyring-self link up with her return-to-Gabriel-with-clean-hair self. As least with Octavia’s jumping storyline it seems like the writers have consistently made some kind of effort to fill in the blanks.

But we’re also looking at the rest of the season where Echo, Gabriel, Hope, oh hi Jordan I forgot about you again, Diyoza, Octavia, and probably Bellamy and Hoth!Kru (AKA team let’s follow Raven onto a strange planet without putting on suits or having an exit strategy, yay!) have all experienced asynchronous development over periods of multiple years. Given the show’s track record from seasons 5 and 6, I strongly suspect that this won’t be handled any better, meaning that the final season of this show is going to try not only to resolve all the plot points, but to toss in a bunch MORE offscreen character development and hope we catch on.

Beyond character development jumps, we also have Raven and Murphy losing their seasons 1-5 development in season 6 only to have to re-learn and re-change back to who they already were in seasons 4 and 5. Murphy learned to value his spacekru family and stop putting himself first 100% of the time, and yet his arc in season 6 happened. Raven has always been involved in the big life-or-death decisions, and had her being-the-bad-guy moment in season 4 with the rationing, but as we saw in 7x03 the writers really wanted to… redo all of that for her? The girl blew up a bridge full of guys and flash-fried a 300-person army when she was 18; blood on her hands may not be fun but what’s with seasons 6 and 7 acting like it’s something new?

While I’m aware that Jason said his seasons are individual movies (don’t admit that you’re bad at continuity buddy ‘cause that’s what it sounds like) seasons 1-5 and 6&7 are clearly telling separate stories (or 1-4, 5, 6-7 if you prefer). The trouble with 6&7 is that unlike seasons 1-4 (and sort-of 5) we no longer know the characters. Every time someone sits still too long, character-development wise, plot comes along and hits the reset button, tosses them into a wormhole for a couple of years and they come back with the same face but no continuity. It was difficult enough to deal with in season 5 – between 6 and 7 I just can’t keep up. (Even writing this meta, I have to keep going back because I remembered another character who fell into this trap.)

Now if a fanfic writer had done the exact same thing – same plot, same time skips, same organization – it would have played out completely different to the readers. We could have gotten to see inside the character’s minds when they arrived back on screen, seeing things with new, older eyes. We could have had minimally invasive flashbacks to show important exposition (like the disaster that was the conversation about Madi’s mom) and verbal descriptions to point out differences like Octavia’s ten-years-older body. Additionally, the plots of seasons 6 and 7 are so different yet full of overdone callbacks to the earlier seasons – if a fan was writing their own AU story but still wanted some of the trappings of the original plot I’d get it, but on a TV show written by the same people it just feels like they ran out of ideas.

Watching seasons 6 and 7 is exactly like watching fanfiction would be – but without the written and fan-made advantages of fanfiction, they fall flat.

*I do like season 7 better than season 6 because the content of the individual episodes containing Murphy/Emori/Raven and Octavia/Diyoza/bbyHope was still enjoyable content, so 2 out of 4 I have liked so far, despite this very very long rant I’ve just written explaining why as a whole I rather hate the season overall.

[bombshellsandbluebells]

clarke and blarke ☕️☕️☕️

Hooooooo boy get ready for me to be the saltiest I’ve ever been on this blog about Clarke/Blarke. I mostly try to keep it to a minimum, both because I know I have followers who like Clarke and Bellarke and because I try overall not to be TOO salty (though this season is trying my patience.)

I always say this, but I did used to really love Clarke in s2. Like REALLY loved her. She was one of my favorites. And I kind of lowkey shipped Bellarke - I was never really that invested and I never really read fic for them at all, but I was generally a fan of the idea of the ship, I guess, and I sort of assumed that’s the direction the show was going in.

At this point I can’t stand either.

Clarke used to be an interesting character. The show still always worked best as an ensemble show focusing on many different characters and how they react to the choices they have to make, but she was an interesting character in her own right in earlier seasons. But the writing has consistently trapped her in the same cycle of making mistakes that make people mad, giving a weak meaningless apology, crying a bit about it being her only choice, and NEVER LEARNING OR CHANGING. They want to keep her stuck between being a terrible person who makes bad choices AND being The Hero who always saves the day and not only does that make her a terribly uninteresting and flat character to me, but it’s also ruined any potential her character once had.

I think the writing has just completely destroyed Clarke as a character. I had hoped maybe last season they were at least COMMITTING with an arc that made her more of a bad guy than a hero and for a while, that was actually pretty interesting, but they ONCE AGAIN solved it by letting Clarke be the Hero and save the day in the end again, despite not fully having earned that. AND THIS SEASON they had the opportunity to actually force Clarke to grow and change and learn AND THEY WASTED IT.

I’m so completely frustrated with the fact that we are going through the exact same cycle with her. Once again she has made choices that hurt other people and made them angry with her and she is giving her weak apologies in response. A bit of crying, the words “i’m sorry” and a justification for your actions is not a real apology - and I wish Clarke had listened to Raven when she told her that.

I don’t want to hate Clarke, frankly. I want the show to make me care about her - she’s the main character. But it’s moved beyond the point of just finding her bland and uninteresting and moved into me actively disliking her character. 

I know the writers aren’t intentionally trying to write Clarke as a selfish, arrogant person, but they are. She makes choices for others because she believes that she is the only one capable of making the Right Choice - despite it being made clear by this point that the other characters would rather she not make choices with their lives. She doesn’t actually regret when those choices hurt or anger people either. Don’t get me wrong, I think she feels BAD about it, but not enough to regret her choice, which she makes clear when she gives reasons and justifications and claims “it was her only choice.” There is a REASON that other characters are constantly angry with Clarke - and it’s because Clarke doesn’t change her actions. She saves the day at the end and then turns around and makes new choices that bother people.

Season 4 said it best - Clarke has a God Complex and unfortunately even in an episode ENTIRELY ABOUT CLARKE HAVING A GOD COMPLEX AND NEEDING TO CHANGE Clarke ultimately didn’t learn her lesson or change. The next episode took her right back to the same place.

Obviously Clarke is a fictional character and she is created by the writing. And I don’t think the way I read her is what the writers intend. I think she is meant to ultimately be a good person who looks out for others and makes the hero sacrifice. But I think the writers keep telling me that without showing me, because what they keep writing for her makes her selfish and arrogant enough that she only believes she can make the right choice and only her choices are right. 

And the thing that’s pissing me off so much this season is that Clarke hasn’t actually been forced to make up for anything she did to the others. And I absolutely do think the others have a right to distrust her and be angry with her, even if I also understand that Clarke was acting out of a desire to save Madi (though it worries me that we’ve never touched again on Clarke literally electrocuting her daughter in order to control her. There wasn’t nearly as much consequence for that as there should have been.) 

Clarke has to earn her way onto that family - not just because her actions hurt Spacekru last season, but because frankly I need to see development in order to buy that Spacekru cares dearly about her. I bought last season easily that over the six years Spacekru came to care about each other like a family. I can’t buy that 3 days after Clarke was practically their enemy - and someone they didn’t really KNOW anymore - she’s suddenly so important to them they’re distraught about her life.

AND I’m really frustrated by the fact that everyone’s storyline seems to revolve around Clarke this season, as if they aren’t interesting characters in their own right with more interesting stories we could tell instead of repeating the same old tired cycle with Clarke. (This tea is all over the place. I’m just ranting.)

So yeah. In my opinion, the writers have ruined Clarke. If you look at it from a writing point of view, by refusing to commit to her flaws and by trying to both sell that there are no good guys AND Clarke is The Hero, they’ve created a flat, boring character who doesn’t grow or change, hasn’t really developed much since s2/3, and is inherently contradictory. If you look at it from a character, in-world point of view, Clarke always believes that Clarke is right, and what she thinks is right is more important than how anyone else feels or what they think, and she is controlling and selfish.

And I hate Bellarke. I actively hate it now. Like I said, I didn’t used to mind it, and I still understand if people want to keep shipping them and writing fanfiction based on their earlier dynamic - but frankly, I despise the idea of a relationship between them now. Last season I would have argued that I actually didn’t think the writers were planning to ever make them canon, and now this season they seem to be pushing their relationship without any development towards it.

Bellarke isn’t healthy anymore. They mistreat each other and argue with each other more than they side with each other and the show won’t take the time to actually rebuild their friendship. Instead they just give us moments that are meant to convince us they’re both still really important to each other, even if it makes no sense and isn’t supported by what we actually see on screen. They AREN’T that important to each other anymore. As of like a week ago they hadn’t seen each other in SIX YEARS. Even if they been best friends before that - debatable, honestly, since the show hasn’t let them spend much time together since s2 - IT WOULD STILL TAKE TIME TO REBUILD THAT RELATIONSHIP. I’m not saying it COULDN’T happen, but it DIDN’T. And the little moments they get here and there - Bellamy crying and mourning over her, etc. - tries to loudly tell me that they have rebuilt that relationship despite the fact that it didn’t actually happen.

Their relationship is all Telling right now, not Showing. It’s all about throwing a few tidbits here are there to convince me they care rather than consistently showing me a close friendship.

And I think it’s ruining Bellamy’s character. Because his entire story now revolves around Clarke - a woman who hasn’t really proved that she is willing to protect him or his family if it puts her and Madi in danger - and it’s weakening him as a character. To try and push Bellarke back to where they were in s2 despite seasons of development pushing them away from that dynamic, they’ve had to undo SO MUCH of Bellamy’s growth and development.

I get that people got attached to the ship and still think of it in terms of what it once was - and I think the dynamic in the first few seasons makes sense - but if the show actually plans to make them a canon couple, they have massively messed up how they wrote their relationship. It doesn’t work anymore and they haven’t put in any of the work to MAKE IT WORK - they’re just coasting on development from 4 seasons ago. It’s lazy. And it’s out of character. And it massively contradicts everything we saw last season.

Anyways. Yeah. I can’t stand Clarke this season, which is a shame because she used to be far better character and they COULD have still done some interesting things with her if they were willing to actually let her recognize her flaws and grow and change. And I absolutely can’t stand Bellarke and I’m not kidding when I say if it goes canon, I’ll probably be done with the show. 

That was a whole disorganized mess of thoughts. 

[thirdmagic]

anyway now that i'm finally back on browser and can write long posts, full spoilery thoughts on rise of skywalker

i had a lot of time to think about it and honestly the more i did the more i went from 'i liked and was ok with most of it until the ending' and now the more i actually thought about it the more it progressed to 'actually, i kind of hate it, and there are individual moments that are very good that i love and then the ending ruins that too and now it rings horribly hollow and now i'm just sad and disappointed and also baffled at this whole movie'

first of all, the good part is: REYLO REYLO REYLO REYLO REYLO REYLO REYLO R E Y L O

i admit i had a very embarrassing reaction of pure unfiltered joy when they kissed because it was such a perfect moment, but also, in general? all the bits involving these two were easily the strongest and the most compelling. a lot of other very stupid bad moments tangled in between, but on the whole, when it was just them, their dynamic, their force bond, it was really intense and spicy and so resonant and beautiful all at one. i love them so so so much. their dynamic is SO juicy and good, their fights were amazing and gorgeous and also spicy and intense, and then the bits of palpatine fight where they interact without any words and just look at each other and you can just tell exactly what's going on without them even needing to say anything, the way they smile at each other and the love in their eyes, the tenderness in every motion, the encouragement when they see each other through the force bond in the middle of the ritual and rey just knows.... these moments are some of the best filmmaking in this whole movie.

unfortunately that was also when we got the bizzare exposition dump on her dumb backstory retcon that's very very delicately done so as to still be consistent with tlj and and this brings me to rey palpatine, which, on the one hand, is kind of the only rey heritage theory i'd ever accept and (ironically) the lesser of several evils that the heritage theories are, but also the undoing of what was really, really compelling in tlj about rey nobody and the horrible waste of potential that came from rey being a Nobody McNothing, her search for identity and ultimately accepting that it doesn't actually make her lesser as a human being, the potential that this movie is when she'll face her insecurities and emptiness and accept herself and find and forge her own path.... and also honestly it's dumb. it's really really dumb. if it had been built up to in any way in any of these movies, that would be one thing, and i actually find a lot of rey's struggles really interesting in concept but just awful and messy and forced in execution, and the idea of rey struggling with being good against an evil legacy and her own darkness is really compelling too, but rey doesn't need to be a palpatine or to want revenge on her actually good parents when being abandoned and alone her whole life is a very very good reason for her to have anger and hatred and darkness to struggle with. it also implies that she's evil because her great grandpa who she never met is evil and because genetics as opposed to like....... again, being abandoned and sold by two asshole jerk parents and having to repress the awful trauma of that her whole life and being unable to come to terms with it, which was interesting, and powerful, and very very real, and then it just throws away a really compelling set up for something really boring and bad. and then an ending for her that has no impact or emotional resonance and makes no sense and isn't in the least bit satisfying.

i will say though that i love love LOVE the dark rey fight, it was a vision but in the exact right Symbolic way, i loved rey struggling with her darkness in theory and it was the one and only part that was executed well, it was truly something that felt like it belonged here, it was eerie and intense and good. and unfortunately not properly followed on in any interesting way.

there were a few jokes that i liked and found funny! the way c3po says 'irony, sir' when poe asks him 'why can you not talk when we NEED you to' has me losing my shit, that was great, and also poe lighting the flashlight when rey uses her lightsaber as one was also hilarious. in general there were definitely a few actually purposefully funny moments that i liked.

ben's whole storyline up til the end was the only thing that really felt consistent and on track imo, a few missteps but mostly stayed solid, and I was very happy to get my bendemption. i can't describe how emotional i got at the scene with han and him throwing away his evil red saber and him calling han 'dad', and the force awakens callback-- i don't know why han is back as a ghost or if that's just a symbolic illusion or whatever, i don't care. adam driver is magnificent, and seeing him as ben again, seeing him comfortable with himself, and happy, on the light side, being playful while fighting and messing with the knights of ren because he’s so powerful and confident in his power, was worth everything. if there's one thing this movie really did right is that it made me suddenly realize that i actually love kylo-ben and also made me realize that i was so much more invested in his happiness than i thought, and unfortunately it made me realize this right as the story gave him maybe a few minutes or seconds of real joy and a beautiful sincere happy smile and then killed him off, and that's when i felt my soul being crushed.

look, i don't have tragic endings, okay, i don't hate even bittersweet endings, the purpose of an ending is to be satisfying and wrap up and tie together all the story strands in a way that makes sense for the story. that's not what this was. i would be willing to forgive the fact that the rest of the movie was a big stupid mess if it had just given the whole saga a proper ending, if it had been like umineko episode 8 which is also a big mess but with a perfect, beautiful, satisfying ending for the entire vn. but instead this just ruined everything, and made me feel miserable, hollow, and sad. this specific story, and trilogy, and nine part saga, did not need that kind of ending. we had a tragic and bittersweet ending for the first two, a happy ending to redeem all the misery of the skywalkers would have felt sincere instead of saccharine because you feel that they fought for it. and it would be a good complement to the rest of the movies and the message. instead we have two people who have both been lonely and emotionally isolated their entire lives finding solace and happiness and comfort in each other, finally finding a true connection and someone who understands them, but only getting to be together for all five minutes before the story rips them apart. and for what? what is this trying to say? what is the point? what is the point of doing that to either of them? how does this serve the story? what is the purpose of this? the tragedy and the depressing ending of the prequels is purposeful and intended and is done to make a point, because it's the story of a fall from the very start, by design, by its very premise. the tragedy of umineko is purposeful and done to make a point because it is about how these tragedies happen, and why, and the human behaviors that lead to them. how is it a good ending and how does it serve and complement anything in the rest of the saga to have one tragedy and one happy story with a bittersweet ending be concluded with a hollow pretension of a happy ending where one main character is miserable his entire life and dies when he’s still young after only a taste of the happiness that’s been denied to him, and the other loses her soulmate and is alone and surrounded by people who she herself said don't really know and understand her? taking on the name of a more famous family as if that's the only way she can forge and identity and meaning for herself?

ben's death actually had me so down and so sad i can't even be angry, honestly. the rest of the movie was full of dumb shit, it's like 80% mcguffin chasing with barley any actual character development or any substance and meat to it, rey-finn-poe have no chemistry because they were never supposed to have because they were never meant to be the trio of the movies until oscar isaac convinced jj to let poe live and that messed everything up because the thematic trio of these movies is finn-rey-ben, rose being sidelined because we need to please the racists who are threatened by her existence i guess and her relationship to finn ignored, the absolute waste of all the new characters and the incredibly stupid hux reveal that's also for naught right afterwards, rey's force lightning, the chewie death fakeout, the entire final battle being a big mess, finn not doing anything interesting or meaningful, the general weird bizarre baffling writing and dialogue choices and how it reads and plays out like something completely disconnected from not just the rest of the trilogy but the entire 9 movies and feels like a messy rough draft that a completed screenplay, and the all over the place pacing and everything... i would have accepted this is a weird, entertaining, fun movie if it weren't for the horribly depressing ending that makes what the creators apparently thinks is a happy ending ring terribly hollow and make me unable to find any joy in it. it's just so depressing i don't have the energy to even be fired up about hating it and i sincerely cannot for the life of me understand why it went this way. how is 'if you're miserable your entire life and make bad choices because of it your only way to redeem yourself is to sacrifice your life and have your one chance at happiness taken away from you because you don't deserve to live past your attempts to fix your mistakes and don't get to have a better life for your efforts'? how is that supposed to mesh with the rest of the story? how is that hopeful or uplifting or anything this saga is supposed to be? what even is this movie about other than the old and tried and redone ten million times 'believe in yourself and the friends you made along the way' message that means nothing at this point?

so yeah. thing bad. and i don’t even have the energy to be salty or angry. i’m just sad and disappointed and depressed about it all. and you know, coming from me, i’m very lenient and can find the good in nearly anything and can appreciate a lot of flawed and otherwise messy media for what it tries to do and for the good it does have. i love all the movies in the saga and i’m still a prequel fan. and the fact that i found this to be so disappointing and unsalvageable and tried to be positive about it and failed should tell you something. 

anyway i'm going to go get a warm blanket, some ice cream or other comfort food while i go watch tlj again to cleanse myself and remember what good movies made by people who understand what's important are like, and maybe go watch marriage story and whatever other stuff adam driver is in, and find a way to watch knives out again, and then binge on the most self indulgent reylo fanfic i can find and a lot of fix-its to heal my soul. i'm not going to stop liking or caring about star wars, or this trilogy, which had one very pleasant solid movie and one excellent and fantastic one, and plenty of other good content out there, just because the last movie dropped the ball so hard, but i am going to stew in my sadness and angst about it for a good long while.

[mimeparadox]

Why Lauren Reed Failed (and Cassandra Ovechkin Succeeded)

(A link to my previous Lauren post, of which this is a spiritual sequel to.)

When Cassandra Ovechkin debuted in season 2 of Nikita, all signs indicated that the series, which paralleled Alias in many ways, had a Lauren of its own in the making.  While she wasn’t presented as an obstacle from the word go as Lauren was, the potential was clearly there, what with her being a lovely woman from Michael’s past who returns to his life with some heaving capital-b Baggage. Then, as subsequent appearances revealed that she was not only a spy, but an agent for the antagonistic private intelligence agency Gogol, the similarities with Lauren became all the starker (*1). Only one thing: unlike Lauren, her story is actually effectively told, and a lot of the reason why that’s the case has to do with empathy.  

Empathy is a key component in writing; without the ability to put oneself in a characters’ shoes, it can become very difficult, if not impossible, to truly understand them, or write them in a consistent or natural-seeming manner. Furthermore, it is quite hard to convince audiences to care about a character if the writers themselves don’t.

Lauren, in particular, really needed viewers to care about her.   Arguably the true protagonist of the show’s third season, she required at least as much viewer investment as Sydney herself. Instead, the writers allowed their perception of the character to be colored by Sydney’s (*2) and they mostly treated her like she did—as an intruder and rival, instead of as someone who, at least initially, had done nothing wrong and was in a situation equally as awkward as Sydney’s.  Soon after their first workplace clash, Sydney declares “I hate her,” and it’s not clear the writers disagree. For the first half of her story, the show paints Lauren as an altogether inferior substitute for Sydney—not as fun, not as admirable, not as smart, not as worthy of respect.  While the rosiest interpretation of the Vaughn-married-someone-else narrative (*3) suggests that Lauren has many admirable and attractive qualities, the best the series can do to show that is treat her with reluctant admiration, or as a well-meaning fool.  Even after the double revelation of her allegiance and family dynamics hits the viewer on the head with a “SYDNEY PARALLELS!” hammer, the writers still can’t spare a moment to investigate how and why she became that way, or what the similarities actually say about either woman.  While the increased focus in the second half of the season gives tantalizing hints about the Lauren that could have been, the series never commits, ultimately using the revelation as a license to celebrate casual misogyny. 

Cassandra, in contrast, is treated first and foremost as a person, and this allows the writers to navigate her story much more gracefully. While Nikita’s impression of Cassandra, much like Sydney’s impression of Lauren, is often neutral to negative—first because of her relationship with Michael, and later because of her lying—Nikita doesn’t allow this to diminish either the character or the series’ empathy for her. When she is revealed to be a double agent, the series allows her to explain her decision and place it in a wider context; yes, she has lied and has worked for bad people; so have Nikita and Michael.  So has Sydney, for that matter: when Cassandra speaks about joining Gogol, she mentions that she did so because she was broke and bored, and being a spy seemed exciting, which are, according to Sydney, exactly the same reasons why she joined SD-6.  Are they also Lauren’s reasons for joining the Covenant? Impossible to say: Alias doesn’t care.

It’s hard to craft a motivation or a consistent inner life for a character if one can’t see them as a person worthy of consideration. It’s particularly hard when a narrative’s unofficial official stance is that characters only deserve empathy if they’re on the heroine’s side.  This had been a consistent issue with Alias: note how both spy parents’ morality is determined not by what they actually do, but by whether or not they’re acting in Sydney’s interests when they do it. Note how Sydney never had to wrestle with the harm she caused while with SD-6, or with people (rightfully) mistrusting her because of her past allegiance.  With Lauren, this myopia comes to the fore, with fatal results.  Nikita, meanwhile, is all about empathy: it’s a story about a woman whose journey towards the light began with the thought “this girl is like me.”

It’s worth mentioning how each series’ reveal affects each character, in part because of how similar they are, but also because how they alter, or don’t alter, the way each character is perceived. “They’ve been working for the bad guys all along” is a plot twist that forces viewers to look backwards: viewers must look back into what’s gone on before, and consider how much it all did or didn’t matter.

Cassandra’s role during her debut, in addition to that of—in Person of Interest parlance—a number, was that of  a secret-keeper: not only was she keeping the truth about Valeri Ovechkin for Michael and Division, she was keeping the secret of Max from the world, and the secret of Max’s parentage from everyone.  While she is nominally in a position of power, as both first lady and someone who (she believes) is owed a favor by the U.S. government, her secrets and lies have served to isolate her and keep her trapped (*4).  Every successive revelation serves to reinforce that narrative: in increasing the number of factions she must keep mollified and the number of lies she must tell in order to remain safe, they make Cassandra seem more like herself.  

One of the worst things about the Lauren reveal, meanwhile, is just how thoroughly it undoes what scant development she’d obtained during the first half of the season.  It is perhaps the best indication that the reveal hadn’t been planned from the start: surely if it had been, the transition from well-intentioned naïf Lauren to cold-blooded killer Lauren wouldn’t have been as abrupt. And yet, there’s no attempt to reconcile the two sides of the character, or to clarify just how much of the character we saw in the season’s first half was an act. The reveal essentially wipes the slate clean, which is not exactly a great thing to happen to a character who already had much of the audience against her.

This is not to say, however, that the way to fix Lauren’s story is legitimately making her the good guy she pretended to be during the first half of her story, or to make her more like Cassandra. It might have made it easier for her to retain what little empathy the writers had for her, but it would have also robbed her of much of what made her ultimately interesting. A Lauren who remained a good guy would have ultimately had no place in Alias’ story. At best, she would have been another Dixon: someone who sticks around, but whose story has no greater resonance (*5). We eventually got our “what if Lauren, but good?” character in the form of Nadia, who was much better at it.  No, Lauren needed to be a villain, and there was no reason why her story couldn’t have worked. All that needed to happen is for the writers to care.

----

Footnotes:

(*1) There’s also the weird thing where both characters have roots in Britain, despite neither being born there. 

(*2) And eventually, the fandom’s. Lauren’s eventual fate is hard to explain as anything other than an attempt to mollify the worst of the fandom.  

(*3) The one that posits that Vaughn fell for her for reasons beyond availability and looking like Melissa George.

(*4) She is, in essence, what Sydney feared she’d become in season 1—Alias’ themes taken to their logical dark extremes.   

(*5) This, I feel, would be true whether or not she remained with Vaughn. In fact, a love triangle resolution where Vaughn remains with her would have likely rendered his character pointless as well. 

Credit where credit is due: My original Alias pictures were obtained from the Alias: A Free Agent fansite, which is somehow—and thankfully—still mostly accessible after all these years. Hat tip to @derevkosark for pointing me in its direction. The current pics are my own. 

[meditationadvise]

How To Breathe Like A Yogi

There's an old adage usually utilized by yoga instructors: without the breath, it's not yoga.

This is oh-so-true. The biggest distinction in between yoga and other types of workout is its focus on the breath. There's a whole element of yoga exercise that's developed after the breath. It's called pranayama-- as well as it's what takes yoga from a workout to a type of meditation. Faucet in to this crucial yogic exercise with this beginner's guide to pranayama.

Why yogis practice pranayama

Yogis are about increasing their prana: the dynamic, energetic pressure within. Prana is what stimulates the body. It's a refined, intangible pressure that gives energy and the power of action. Good wellness is a sign that prana is abundant.

Prana's physical counterpart is the breath. They're not precisely the same point, however we obtain prana through the breath, and prana could be increased by controling the breath. This is the goal of pranayama.

Yogis usage breathing workouts to increase, increase, and stabilize this dynamic internal energy.

Pranayama also cleanses the body's refined channels to make sure that prana doesn't obtain stuck anywhere in your body and also could free flow throughout it. This is likewise essential for yoga's greater goals of self-realization.

Although this application of pranayama might seem a little esoteric, it does have concrete physical benefits as well.

Pranayama enhances the lungs as well as improves their functioning. It eases stress and anxiety, reduces blood stress as well as heart rate, enhances digestion, and stabilizes the nerves. It likewise trains the mind to concentrate much better in reflection (another extremely important element of yoga).

In order to enjoy every one of these gorgeous advantages, it's essential to start with the essentials:

First comes belly breathing

So lots of people are breathing all wrong. You listened to right-- regardless of breathing being free, it's totally possible to breath incorrectly. It's a physical feature that lots of could and also frequently do misshape, specifically when they're stressed or anxious.

If you've ever viewed a child breathe, you have actually observed appropriate breathing. Their wonderful little bellies climb with each inhalation and also carefully drop with each exhalation, practically as if there's a balloon broadening and contracting inside.

Babies take full abdominal breaths, as well as this coincides technique that we need to proceed with as adults.

Take a moment to notice how

you're breathing today. Don't manage your breath whatsoever-- just observe.

What's your stubborn belly doing? Is it broadening and contracting?

Or is it your breast that's moving the most?

Are you taking a breath via your mouth or through your nose?

Are you gripping your tummy?

Ideally, your tummy is broadening as well as getting. You're taking a breath via your nose and also there's no stress in your belly.

If this isn't the case, it's time to relearn the art of breathing. This is necessary both for the practice of pranayama as well as for your overall health.

If you breathe shallowly right into the breast, you don't make complete use of the lungs and you burglarize your interior organs of their full supply of oxygen. And also, the diaphragm doesn't make its complete downward movement. The organs miss out on out on the mini-massage that would normally happen with this downward force.

Breathing via the mouth also presents its troubles. The nose is developed to filter, moisten, as well as warm the air we inhale. Mouth breathing denies the breathing system of these vital processes.

Yet another issue with improper breathing is that it triggers anxiety as well as stress and anxiety. The breath and also mind are significantly associated. There's an all-natural tendency to grip the stomach as well as take a breath shallowly right into the upper body because of stress or anxiety.

The very same thing can happen backwards. If you hold your stubborn belly as well as take a breath shallowly into your breast, you could cause feelings of stress and also anxiousness. You essentially subject on your own to completely unnecessary negativity!

Moral of the story: appropriate breathing is unbelievably crucial. It's also the primary step in finding out pranayama, because without this solid structure, any manipulation of the breath will be dangerous instead of helpful.

Pranayama Practice # 1: Stomach Breathing

If you've created incorrect breathing habits, follow these steps to reset your breath. You could practice this technique for a few minutes each day and sign in periodically throughout the day to observe your breath.

If you're breathing shallowly or with your mouth, correct yourself. You'll ultimately undo bad habits.

1. Lie down on your back. Spread your feet broad and let them tumble open. Take 3 natural breaths via your nose.

2. Purposely relax your stomach muscles.

3. Place your best hand on your stubborn belly and also your left hand on your chest. Take a slow, deep inhalation that fills your stomach. Your ideal hand ought to increase as you inhale.

4. Exhale slowly. Your right hand need to fall as you exhale.

5. Proceed this method for a number of minutes. Focus on your breath. If your mind wanders, bring it back to the breath. As soon as you're comfy doing this relaxing, try tummy breathing while being in a chair or on the floor with your legs crossed.

Your breast will certainly likewise fluctuate during this practice. This is completely normal and absolutely alright as long as your stubborn belly is climbing as well as falling in addition to it. With each inhalation, the first area to broaden is the stubborn belly. Next comes the breast, and finally the throat.

This process takes place in reverse with each exhalation.

Pranayama Practice # 2: Alternative Nostril Breathing

Also referred to as anuloma viloma or nadi shodhana, alternating nostril breathing is a practice that provides instantaneous results. It's unbelievably soothing, making it the excellent remedy to stress, anxiety, and also nervousness.

And it isn't reserved for the mat just. Alternating nostril breathing can be practiced basically anytime, anywhere.

Alternate nostril breathing is precisely as its name implies: the breath is inhaled as well as exhaled with one nostril each time. The goal is to balance the breath in between both nostrils due to the fact that we actually don't normally take a breath via both at when. We take a breath mostly through just one, rotating between the 2 around every 90 minutes.

You could evaluate this fact by putting your finger below your nose. You'll observe that the air is moving primarily via one nostril only.

If the air occurs to really feel even with both, you might have caught the junction that occurs every 90 minutes. Throughout this junction, we experience an inner sense of tranquility. This is precisely the sensation that yogis purpose to resemble through alternate nostril breathing.

According to yoga and Eastern medicine, each nostril associates with the contrary side of the brain.

Predominantly breathing via the right nostril symbolizes that the left brain is energetic. The left brain has even more to do with rational mind like regular and also planning.

Predominantly breathing via the left nostril, on the other hand, represents that the best mind is active. The appropriate brain has more to do with imaginative thought processes as well as intuition.

When the breath is balanced between both, the entire brain is active. Other refined forces are likewise balanced, such as the manly and feminine, as well as the lunar and solar. This all brings a relaxed state that's particularly favorable to meditation.

Alternate nostril breathing is the ideal method to do before sitting for a reflection session, before sleeping, or anytime you're feeling stressed out or nervous:

1. Sit in a comfortable position either with your legs went across, folded up beneath you, or being in a chair with your feet level on the ground. Sit great and also tall with your shoulders kicked back. Rest your hands in your lap with your palms encountering down. Shut your eyes.

2. Tuck your best index as well as center fingers right into your hand to form the vishnu mudra. Your thumb, ring and pinky fingers will certainly be extended.

3. Take an easy breath in. Carefully shut your right nostril with your thumb. Take a very easy breath out via your left nostril.

4. Take an easy breath in with your left nostril. Shut your left nostril with your third finger, release your thumb from your right nostril, and take an easy breath out through your right nostril.

5. Now take a very easy breath in via the right, shut the right, as well as take an easy breath out with the left. Now in with the left, close the left, as well as very easy breath out via the right.

6. Continue this pattern for five minutes. Make sure you do not tighten your right shoulder.

Concentrate on your breath. If your mind wanders, bring it back to the breath.

When you're completed, launch your hand as well as rest on your back for a minute or 2, taking a breath naturally, observing the tranquil sensation that's washed over the body.

Pranayama Practice # 3: Ujjayi Breathing

If you regular vinaysa classes, you're most likely currently accustomed to ujjayi pranayama, also called Darth Vader breathing, victorious breath, or ocean breathing. This psychic breath has a tranquilizing result as it mimics deep sleep. It helps the mind to focus throughout a yoga method, which is why its utilized in tandem with vinyasa flows.

Ujjayi likewise has a comforting impact on the nerves. This makes it a natural antidote to stress and irritation:

1. Sit in a comfortable position either with your legs went across, folded below you, or being in a chair with your feet level on the ground. Sit great and also tall with your shoulders loosened up. Rest your hands in your lap with your palms encountering down. Shut your eyes.

2. Take three natural breaths.

3. Inhale. Open your mouth as well as breathe out as if you're fogging a mirror. You'll need to acquire your glottis-the slim flap of cartilage at the back of your throat. This action will make a Darth Vader-like sound. Currently do the very same thing as you breathe in, but close your lips. You'll be breathing like Darth Vader on both the inhalations and exhalations.

4. Proceed this breath momentarily or two. Breathe slowly and deeply, bearing in mind to fill your stomach with each inhalation. Concentrate on your breath. If your mind wanders, bring it back to the breath. With method you can gradual increase to 5 minutes.

When it pertains to pranayama, take your time.

Before all else, take as much time as you should find out stomach breathing. Just when you have this stomach breath mastered should you start to check out alternating nostril breathing, ujjayi, and other pranayama techniques. There's absolutely no thrill when it concerns discovering pranayama. It's a component of yoga exercise that's suggested to be found out during years.

Never stress during pranayama. Always experiment a feeling of rhythmic effortlessness. If you really feel like you're short of breath or lightheaded, stop and relax in remains present (savasana).

Our old yogic forefathers alerted other yogis of the ominous consequences of inappropriate pranayama. Consequently, pranayama is likewise suggested to be found out straight from a teacher.

Not all breathing workouts appropriate for all trainees. An instructor will certainly assist lead you toward pranayama that's proper for your own constitution as well as present state of health.

When you do discover to practice pranayama correctly, nonetheless, you can take your yoga exercise practice to an entire brand-new level.

By connecting the body with the mind, pranayama changes yoga exercise from exercise to a relocating meditation.

P. S. Intend to build a home yoga exercise method however are not able to stick to it?

Start your free 7-day yoga obstacle today!

[saltnhalo]

saltnhalo’s 2018 writing

I made one of these roundups last year, so I figured I’d do the same this year. Between travelling and being in the hospital for a while, I didn’t get quite as much done, but I’m still damn proud of all my words.

Fics on A03

Roll With It (January)

8,086 words this year, 72k total (Explicit)

For two years, Dean’s been slaving away beneath his boss – many label him a secretary, but he fucking hates that and feels like it only applies to someone wearing a pencil skirt, so he insists on his title of Executive Assistant. And for what? In the vain hope that one day he’ll manage to become an editor for Sandover Publishing, and that he’ll see the manuscript that he’s slaved over since college finally realized in print.

That’s the dream, anyway.

Right now, he’s fucking late.

Dean wants to be an editor. Castiel just wants to stay in the country. ‘The Proposal’ – as you’ve never seen it before.

(Editor!Cas, Assistant!Dean)

I Don’t Know Why (January-February)

10,710 words this year, 16.5k total

Dean gets home from a long job to find a note on his front step. He knows exactly who it’s from and what it means; it promises fun and danger and a fucking good time, and there’s no way he can turn down this invitation.

He can never say no to the Angel.

(Assassin!Cas, Spy!Dean)

Flowers (February)

1,004 words, 3.4k total, co-written with destimushi and cryptomoon (Teen)

Three times Dean gave Cas flowers. Well. Kinda.

(Canon compliant, Valentine’s Day)

The Galaxy’s Most Wanted (March)

10,155 words (Explicit)

Dean had been the one always up to mischief, running around with his father’s broken laser pistol and constantly getting into places he shouldn’t have been. Sam, in comparison, always seemed to be the smart, studious one – until he reprogrammed the AI in their neighbours’ house to play ‘Happy Birthday’ at the loudest possible volume while keeping all the doors and windows firmly locked. It had taken two experts seven hours to undo the coding that Sam had managed to integrate into the house’s programming.

So, yes. They had been exceptional even from the beginning. And when John Winchester crossed one too many people, his sons inherited his beloved ship, and took to the cosmos doing what they knew best: stealing.

And they were damn good at it too. Almost unrivalled, across their own galaxy and even those neighbouring.

Almost.

(Space pirates, enemies to lovers)

Ensnared (April)

1,543 this year, 10k total (Mature)

As the current pulls him a little closer to the island, the singing grows stronger. It’s deep and lyrical and the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard and he’s suddenly overcome by the desperate, searing need to be closer, to hear it in all its intended glory.

And as he passes a single spur of rock that juts out a little further into the ocean than the others, Dean sees him.

(Siren!Cas, shipwrecked!Dean)

A Lesson In Obedience (April)

6,396 words (Explicit)

Castiel helps Dean to relax after a long and stressful day at work.

(Sub!Dean, Dom!Cas)

Little Blue Dragon (April)

23,820 words (Explicit)

Dean Winchester may have a reputation for being a skilled craftsman and blacksmith, but his life is just like anyone else’s. He’s over-worked and under-slept, and it’s all because of the niggling feeling in the back of his mind that tells him he’s… forgetting something. Still, he can’t let his weird dreams or errant thoughts get in the way of his work and his love for his craft. The strange feeling goes ignored.

That is, until he meets a man with jewel-blue eyes and an aura of intrigue. Castiel slots into his life in a way that Dean had never thought possible, and Dean grows accustomed to the mysterious man’s visits and brilliant smiles and tales of far-away places.

He’d never known he was missing a piece of himself until he met Castiel, and he thinks that Cas might feel the same way.

Until Castiel disappears from Dean’s life completely.

(Blacksmith!Dean, dragon!Cas)

Worst Impressions (May)

15,061 words, co-written with thepopeisdope (Explicit)

It should be a simple story: they meet, they click (or don’t), and they move forward with their lives from there. It happens every day.

Except in reality, for them, it’s not nearly that simple. It’s more like: they meet, they hate each other with a passion, and then suddenly a firefighter is on a date with a librarian, and somehow that isn’t the most unexpected development of their relationship.

From the instant Dean saw that the drop-dead-gorgeous firefighter had horns and a tail, he knew he was fucked.

(Angel!Dean, demon!Cas)

Trouble In The Best Way (July)

2,173 words (Teen)

When Dean is called in to see Emma's principal about his daughter's behaviour, he's not expecting to encounter one of the most attractive guys he's ever met in Castiel Novak, the father of Emma's partner-in-crime.

(Single parents, strangers to lovers)

Through The Fire (June-September)

30,444 words, WIP (Explicit)

When John Winchester strikes a deal with the Alpha of another pack, Dean is the one forced to take the hit for his family. He suddenly finds himself betrothed to the infamous mafioso Castiel Krushnic—an alpha with a terrifying reputation, who commands respect from all those who meet him. Once mated, Dean and Castiel must find a balance in the dynamics of their relationship, or risk bringing the whole of the Krushnic empire to its knees.

The challenges thrown their way have to be handled together, for better or for worse.

(Mafia AU, A/B/O)

Kiss Me, Kill Me (September)

4668 words (Mature)

Seasoned hitman Castiel Novak is just looking to take out his target and get paid, but should've accounted for the fact that he may not be the only assassin at tonight's party...

Cue the mysterious, green-eyed man who is more of a match for Castiel than anyone he's ever met.

(Assassin AU, A/B/O)

What The Rain Brings (October)

6,043 words (Explicit)

In which Castiel's new roommate—supposed to be an alpha, under the guidelines of the college dorms—turns out to be a) late, and b) a beautiful, sarcastic, drenched omega.

(College AU, A/B/O)

Such Familiar Magic (December)

6,333 words (Teen)

When solitary witch Castiel finds an injured dog unconscious in his garden, he takes it in. He's expecting to heal it, look after it for a few days, then perhaps return it to its owners.

He's not expecting it to be one of the strongest familiars he's ever met.

(Witch!Cas, familiar!Dean)

Fics on Tumblr

Blowjob (353, NSFW)

College stress (1,055)

Bondage (264, NSFW)

Rimming (540, NSFW)

Exhibitionism (1,354, NSFW)

Edging (497, NSFW)

Movie night (579)

Sexting (1,025, NSFW)

Riding (342, NSFW)

Cas in suspenders (164)

Café meet-cute (721)

Micestiel (502)

Witch Cas/Familiar Dean (822)

Captured spy Dean (1,705)

T-shirt (494)

Stitches (500)

High school love (847) Ending 1 | Ending 2

Art thief Dean (1,421)

Fallen Cas (419)

High school reunion (711)

Fake dating (854)

Yoga (857, based on these gifs)

Baking (509)

Sleeping hunters (435, inspired by this beautiful art)

Nude model (703)

Angel Dean/Demon Cas (785)

Suspension (720, NSFW-ish)

Stargazing (461)

Bar pining (604)

Moving house (466)

Beach vacation (926)

Nesting (708)

Noctuary (1,885)

Quidditch (839)

Love confession (2,172, NSFW-ish)

Sam gets a dog (480)

Actors AU (2,636, NSFW-ish)

Reverse!verse (284)

Art student Cas (980)

Motel (494)

Prom invite (1,197)

Dancing (1,176)

Mistletoe (509)

Deaf Dean (816)

Find all my tumblr fics collated on AO3 here

Words posted to AO3: 126,436 Words posted to tumblr: 35,811 Words posted in total: 162,247

Thank you so much to every single person who has read, kudosed, liked, reblogged or commented this year. Your support means the absolute world to me, as without people to read and enjoy what I put out onto the internet, I probably wouldn’t still be writing today. You guys are all so special to me, and I can’t wait to see what 2019 brings for us all.

[pass-the-bechdel]

Continuum season one full review

How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?

80% (eight of ten)

What is the average percentage per episode of female characters with names and lines?

30.6%  

How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?

One, episode 1.05, “A Test of Time” (41.18%)

How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?

Zero.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twenty-two. Seven who appear in more than one episode, five who appear in at least half the episodes, and one who appears in every episode.

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Forty-four. Fifteen who appear in more than one episode, eleven who appear in at least half the episodes, and three who appear in every episode.

Positive Content Status:

Perfectly average, with nothing terrible, but nothing of note, either.  (average rating of 3.0)

General Season Quality:

Solid. It attempts to merge police procedural element with a more serialized narrative, and generally succeeds at both.  It is also clearly a series that realizes the potential of its premise and is interested in exploring it in depth.

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:

Let’s talk about heroes.

Heroism, in stories set in versions of Earth that are meant to resemble ours—see: the MCU, Supergirl, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, earthbound Doctor Who stories not set in the future—tends to be associated with maintaining the status quo. As disruptive as heroes often are by nature and necessity, they generally don’t work to change things for the better in a general way, but rather, to ensure things don’t get worse. Society, by implication, becomes “good enough”—something worth keeping around as is. This tendency is occasionally questioned—not surprising, given all the ways the status quo isn’t actually good for many people—but the story’s internal rules mean that the conclusion is often a half-hearted “eh, what other option is there?” with the occasional “but that way lies tyranny!” While this stance isn’t entirely without reason, it’s also often frustrating. Inaction and tyranny aren’t the only choices, so why pretend that they are?  

This right here is one of the main reasons why I really appreciate Continuum, and why I would probably do so even if the show weren’t as consistently solid as it is.  It is a show entirely built around the idea that the status quo is untenable, and that trying to keep things as they are can only bring about the destruction of the human race at the hands of the 1%.  While it’s far from the only series with a social conscience, it is one of the very few to declare that what is needed is massive, widespread and disruptive social change. That it does so while also being a police procedural, a genre that tends to be almost inextricably tied to conservative politics and an affinity for the status quo, is all the more impressive.  

I’m fascinated by stories about people vs. the future—it’s the absolute impossibility of the struggle that gets me. I mean, how do you fight change? Sarah Connors’ battle wasn’t just about deadly people-killing robots; it was a fight against progress, a refusal to acknowledge that humans will continue to advance technologically no matter what you do, and  “winning,” in those terms, meant undoing the previous fifty years of existence. Team Machine’s battle against Samaritan hit the same points: in the end, if didn’t matter whether one particular artificial super-intelligence was atomized, because another would take its place—maybe not soon but eventually.  

While Liber8’s struggle has some similarities to these fights, it is, in the end, fundamentally different. The Corporate Congress and the mass demotion of actual people to second-class citizens isn’t inevitable the way the advent of artificial super-intelligences is. There’s no reason why humanity can’t continue progressing technologically AND choose not to bring back indentured servitude. If the terrible future happens, it’s not because the arc of humanity inevitably bends towards corporate dystopia, but because the people in positions to change things…didn’t. Also, while artificial super-intelligences are still years away, Continuum’s apocalyptic future isn’t really the future at all.  Corporations aren’t going to wait fifty years before they choose to actively reduce people’s freedoms in order to obtain ever greater profits; it’s what they’re doing at this very moment.  Liber8’s battle is much more urgent and immediate, and that ups the difficulty level of the storytelling immeasurably—it would have been very easy for the series to fuck it all up.  

Fortunately, Continuum, for the most part, hasn’t.  It’s not perfect—its theory of oppression largely ignores the role of marginalized identities, and how these shape the way oppression is performed and perceived (and no, making most of Liber8’s members people of color isn’t enough to address this)—but the series’ heart and storytelling instincts appear to be where they need to be. They actually care about the issues at play, and that’s mostly evidenced in the fact that it treats Liber8’s fight as legitimate.  It could have been the easiest thing in the world for Continuum to be the story of cop vs. terrorists FROM THE FUTURE!, and for Liber8’s motives to be nothing more than the motivation to get the story going, or a cover for more traditional nefariousness. Instead, it is the whole point. Continuum is a series about getting from point A to point B, and about just how complicated things can get.

Speaking of complicated: Kiera Cameron.

While Kiera is very much a genre show protagonist—Continuum is very much a genre show—she actually reminds me more of a character from an entirely different sort of story—The Good Wife’s Alicia Florrick.   This is a good thing, since Alicia is one of the best protagonists on television and I love her for many of the reasons I love Kiera. I love that she’s an introvert who doesn’t make friends easily. I like that she likes systems, and feels most comfortable inside them. I like that she is fundamentally selfish. I like that neither she nor the series is exactly concerned about her being approachable or cool. Perhaps most importantly, I like that while the series is never short of sympathy for her, it is also very clear that her goal is completely incompatible with the good future.  

Unfortunately, none of the show’s other female characters manage to equal Kiera, or even come close. While there’s no glaring missteps I can identify in the show’s female representation—aside from the usual ones—there’s no real revelations, either: Sonya, Garza, and Betty, are, for the moment, just alright. Somewhat ironically, the one-shot female characters do better than the more promising ones, in part because they’re more numerous and varied, and in part because the series can’t afford to punt their development to a future date. While this feels like the result of circumstance rather than intention—with so much to cover and so little time to do so, something had to give—that’s really just an excuse. There’s no reason why the characters who got prioritized this season had to mostly be men.  

If there is something noteworthy in the way Continuum approaches gender, it is in Kiera’s relationship with Carlos, which is my favorite dynamic in the show. While I tend to look askance at calls for more purely platonic relationships between sexually compatible characters—I’m not often confident they’re made in good faith—I do like the idea in theory, and this relationship is an excellent proof of concept. Kiera and Carlos could get together. There’s tons of evidence that they’re compatible, and he’s a better person than Kellogg or—ugh!—Alec.  Heck, there’s absolutely no evidence here that they aren’t going to get together in the future. But it’s not happening now, and neither the characters or the show think there’s anything wrong with that or that it makes their relationship somehow lesser.  It isn’t that romance isn’t important or it’s incompatible with depth or great storytelling and character development; the elements of the relationship that I like— push and pull, between people who disagree on a lot but respect each other and are more than willing to meet each other halfway—could easily still be there if they were together. It’s just that sometimes, it doesn’t need to be there.

(I’m team Kiera / no one, myself.)

Kiera’s relationship with Alec, meanwhile, is not nearly as compelling, in large part because Alec is the element of the show that least works.  I understand his place in the narrative, and I can totally see how a character like him would end up eventually helping create the corporate dystopia, but this doesn’t make the present-day version of the character and his immaturity any easier to take (his future self is fine). He’s not intolerable, and I like the family drama that surrounds him—the best episode of the season is all about the Saddlers and Randols—but he’s also not great, and given just how many characters and concepts are fighting for attention, that’s something the series can’t afford.  

To mix metaphors, Continuum is a high-wire act, juggling so many balls that it is in constant danger of collapse. There’s a let’s-prevent-the-terrible-future time travel narrative, with all the usual complications of time travel stories. There’s a good half-dozen fish-out-of-water narratives.  There’s a traditional police procedural, except that it also involves future technology. There’s an exploration of class warfare and capitalism, and the evolving roles of activism and terrorism within it. There’s family drama. Taken together, it’s arguably more than can be properly explored in ten episodes, and that the series did as well as it did is genuinely surprising. While I’m not sure it can keep up the balancing act indefinitely as it continues, I’m interested in seeing how long it lasts.