tged webtoon ep 157 spoilers and thoughts but also a good amount of panel dissection that might be overanalyzed but i couldn't stop thinking about it so just let me yap okay it plagued me all weekend
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i am so serious when i say this entire episode gave me like. so much worry and anxiety over the characters that i made myself upset thinking about it . the only thing saving me is everyone's fun expressions in this and specifically this panel of javier
HES SO SILLY CUTE PLAYING WITH THE SUMMONS THEYRE ADORABLE EEHEHEHEHE
anyway . to the brainrot
i think this panel of lloyd turning his back to javier, immediately after telling javier to go on break for a while, was the first little indicator of "oh no" for me
it really worried me that he said this, especially when they've been working together so much on their journey, so this was tiny little moment of "oh boy whats going on,,," for me,,, idk if anyone else felt the same but i had a feeling i would Not be ready for this ep. and i was right i was absolutely not ready
and then we hit the montage of javier going around the estate and observing how much the land has changed, and i really loved that!! it was really heartwarming seeing everyone, smiling and achieving dreams and stability in a way that the fronteras hadnt seen in a long time (hell i was convinced "oh everythings fine nvm" 😭)
some of my favorite panels in that sequence heehee bayern and his kids this was really really sweet WAAAHH
JAVIERS EXPRESSION HERE WAS SUPER FUNNY TOO absolutely gonna use this as a reaction image
ALSO THIS STATUE OF LLOYD ADHAHAHAHAHDFAHA IM PRETTY SURE IT IS RELATED TO IF NOT THE SAME AS THE STATUE IN CPSM they do have different poses so it mightve had to be rebuilt or something but either way . lloyd statue where he's near naked for some reason in the middle of frontera estate. a wonderful center piece good work team
AND MY BABY BOY SOLITAS he finally managed to create something im so proud of him GOOD JOB BUD!! THE CARVING IS BEAUTIFUL!!!
it just hit me as im typing this that they also say "[project name] complete" not sure if this is a translation thing or if it's something they picked up from lloyd saying "construction complete" but if its the latter thatd be REALLY CUTE
also that panel of tordes by the mines he looks genuinely . satisfied and happy?? the guy punished to work for the fronteras for over 100 years is having a great time LMAO
AND THIS PANEL OF JAVIER
THIS MADE ME SMILE SO WIDE
it's really really pretty, and javier can see that. he can see that the estate has grown and changed into a strong and capable place, and he echoed this in the last chapter but it's really worth celebrating this. so many accomplishments, in so little time, with so much efficiency. frontera estate has been raised from the ground up and seeing it all accumulated was so so beautiful,,,
so seeing this panel absolutely devastated me
the contrast is STRIKING. all of the brightness and light and warmth of the street javier is in is only seen in partial rays streaking in. lloyd is alone, surrounded by books and in a darker corner of the panel. isolated, facial features unreadable and working by himself,,, refusing to see or ignoring all of the accomplishments behind him.
it's like he's falling back into old habits. that workaholism that kept him alive when he was only kim suho in korea. in order to survive, to keep up, to stay afloat, to stay ALIVE, you must keep working. go to the next project, the next problem, the next assignment, and everything will be fine. only then will freedom be yours to have. only then will you be free of this responsibility you bear for those you love.
but he really doesn't need to do that anymore! he has a whole estate of people who will follow him to the ends of the earth, because he's proven himself to be capable of protecting them. he has parents who love him, despite his changes, despite his past, who have grown to believe in him.
he has his beloved knight, who is waiting for him to call for aid. who only needs a glance or a word to lend a hand. who is waiting for him to come outside and just SEE all that he's done. to celebrate, to have peace. to enjoy home. to simply be at home, together.
"when will you be able to come here...?"
javier, protagonist that he is, sees all this light around, and it's peeking into this library that lloyd is in, wondering where the engineer is, but his nose is to a book. because he is working. and that's,,, scary to see. there's a level of distance already taking shape because of old habits, and i don't know if either of them realize it
and like you look at the panel javier is in one more time and you can see, there's kids playing as javier and lloyd! they even have matching hair, and the dog is colored exactly like ppodong. super cute! but it worries me that they're on opposite sides of javier.
said this earlier; this is probably an overanalysis and this probably means nothing. it really is a cute lil cameo of some kids in town! but the fact that they are split like this is eating at me. ppodong-dog is on javier-kid's side, when ppodong is lloyd's summon? and again, they're on opposite sides of javier, will they join back together and keep playing? lloyd-kid is ahead of javier-kid, will he run on ahead without looking back? it's so cute and yet it's making me anxious!!! am i overthinking???
anyway, this split and the two panels contrasting each other like this filled me with so much nervousness that i had to close my eyes and just breathe for a little bit
then we see arcos and marbella talking about lloyd and it's clear they're worried about him, still unsure of where these changes in behavior came from and yet accepting it nonetheless because god dammit theyre good kind people
and when we see lloyd he looks,,,
tired, and disheveled, and still only thinking about working on the next thing. he keeps going on too, like there's nothing currently wrong with this; he's probably used to it, handling everything without a moments rest. the count and countess even mention it at the end of the episode
and when he treats the formal frontera attire lightly and scurries off again, it's like a final nail in this sinking coffin. honestly, i think early lloyd probably would have said similar things to try and skirt the count's attention, but this scene in combination with lloyd being depicted as separated from lloyd, appearing exhausted from continuous work, as well as the following panels of lloyd leaving,,, it fills me with anxiety and dread.
face shrouded in the darkness of the hall, so his features are unrecognizable, just like the library panel. who is that? is it suho or is it lloyd speaking right now? where are you going, into that darkness by yourself, shying away from the light you've brought to this estate? you don't have to do this alone.
and this long, looming distance stretching between him and arcos and marbella. stretching further as lloyd marches onward and alone, working by himself, away from the moments of peace and celebration that his family and his estate bring. into the dark. it's a little haunting to me.
these panels did a really, REALLY good job at solidifying this growing degree of isolation that lloyd is putting himself into, intentionally or not (for lloyd and for the artist lol). he's getting out of reach in his desire to protect everyone, to complete this responsibility he gave himself for the estate.
it's almost,,, backwards? in a way? in the early webtoon, there's a panel where suho is shown trying to reach for a light in the darkness. he believed that if he kept working towards that light, he'll find a way out of this hell he's found himself in, and so everything would be fine. here and now, it could be that he still thinks that this is the case, when it's in fact the opposite. he's brought this light to the estate, but he's putting himself in the dark (and alone, at that) in an effort to reach for the "next light". i don't think he realizes it. this makes me really, really sad. jesus christ well done artist/adaptor
what is it all for if you won't even rest? if you won't turn around and look at all these people who need you around? and not need you as in doing work for them, but need you as in wanting to be with you, and cherishing you, and spending time with you, and simply loving you. yes, time is short and yes, fate is looming, but all this effort to fight those things is still making him lose this connection he has with the estate. he doesn't have to do this alone,,, he doesn't have work endlessly. take a BREAK LLOYD
and by the end of the episode it's to the point that arcos and marbella have realized that that's not lloyd frontera. that's someone else. and gods their faces are DEVASTATING
eyes shadowed, irises blank and lost. they're not frowning deeply, but i can feel the upset layered in. is it disappointment or is it grief? i can't really say for sure, but man,,, man.
anyway yeah i hope u guys understand why this episode gave me anxiety LMFAO
i am so so so sorry for the overthinking/overdissection in this post but my brain started connecting things . whether or not they make sense or if it's just being nitpicky is impossible for me to see so. yeah take this however u will
i actually also briefly saw someone on twitter say that this wasn't in the novel? which is interesting and also a little scary i hope lloyd will turn out alright AHHH
i really hope next episode everyone will be alright ,,, please i cant take this much emotional twisting and turning im gonna lose my mind
see y'all next week or in the next shitpost,,, whichever comes first
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A Walking Heroic History
"Besides,” Harry said, “It seems pretty simple to me. You were a git, and I hated you. Now you’re not a git, and I love you. Easy as that.”
For @harryjamespotterweek 2023, Day 3 (Scars, Enemies to Lovers)
Rated T, 1.2k words. Read on ao3 here
“What about this one?” Draco’s fingers, tacky with sea salt, caught on Harry’s skin, just above his hip.
“Third year. The Whomping Willow got me, I think, or maybe it was when I fell by the lake with the Dementors after that.”
Draco bent to place a gentle kiss on the scar, then his fingers continued their exploration up Harry’s side.
“This one?” he asked, pressing a small kiss to it preemptively, smirking when Harry twitched away, huffing out a laugh.
“That tickles.”
Draco did it again, just to make him squirm.
“Fell out of a tree when I was eight. I bounced when I hit the ground, but a branch caught me first.”
One last, tickling kiss, and Draco moved on again.
Over Harry’s shoulder - “I genuinely have no clue, I just noticed it one day in fifth year,” - down Harry’s arm - “Wormtail, in the cemetery, fourth year,” - all the way to his hand.
“Umbridge and her evil quill in fifth year.”
Draco linked their fingers and lay back, pulling Harry’s hand up to his mouth for another kiss, gritty with the sand stuck to his skin.
“We all wondered about that, you know,” Draco said, idly tracing the letters. “In Slytherin. We all knew you had cuts on the back of your hands Blaise even set up a betting pool on it.”
“Who won?”
“Daphne Greengrass. She asked a Gryffindor boy who had seen you in the common room and he told her. To hear her tell it, she seduced it out of him, but I suspect he didn’t see any reason not to answer her when she asked.”
Harry gave another small laugh, sun-warm and content, and after a moment, Draco continued.
“I am sorry, about all of that. I don’t think I mentioned that when I said- before. But I am sorry for the Inquisitorial Squad, and what she did to you.”
Harry gave his hand a gentle squeeze. “You don’t have to keep apologizing. I know.” In an even softer voice, he added, “I still remember what you said that first time. Besides,” Harry said, continuing on at his normal volume, “It seems pretty simple to me. You were a git, and I hated you. Now you’re not a git, and I love you. Easy as that.”
Draco squeezed his hand back, and Harry kissed his fingertips.
“Second year,” said Draco, and Harry hummed a question in response. “On my ring finger, on the side, near where you kissed, there’s a scar from second year.”
Harry sought it out, found it between Draco’s second and third knuckles, pointing to the place where Harry suspected he would put a ring someday in the near future. It was still too soon to be proposing, but Harry kissed the shiny silver scar, and then kissed the bottom of Draco’s finger too, as a placeholder for now.
“What happened?” Harry asked, “Did the Basilisk get you too?”
Draco elbowed him hard in the ribs.
“No. You did, actually.”
“What? When did I hurt you in second year?” Harry was sure he would have remembered attacking Draco in second year, not least of all because Draco would have thrown such a fit that everyone in Hogwarts would have surely remembered it.
“During the Dueling Club,” Draco said, his smug smile evident even in his voice.
“I did not!” Harry protested, sitting up so fast he flung sand into Draco’s face.
Draco tossed his head to flick the errant sand away, then opened his eyes looking incredibly pleased with himself.
“You did. You sent me flying back, and I scraped my finger on the ground.”
Harry couldn’t see his own face, but he was sure it looked as unimpressed as he felt.
“That’s hardly anything! How on earth did it scar? Why didn’t you have someone heal you? It can’t have been that bad, or else someone would have noticed the blood.”
“Well, it wasn’t that bad at first, Potter,” Draco drawled, so horribly self-satisfied Harry almost choked on it. “But you see, I hated you then, because you had refused my offer of friendship, and everyone thought you were the Heir of Slytherin, and I just couldn’t let any of that go. So, I didn’t let it heal, and kept making it worse, because you were my sworn enemy, and I wanted the burden of being marked by your cruel villainy for the rest of my life.”
Harry blinked down at him for a second, then said, “You’re insane.”
“I was twelve, everyone’s like that when they’re twelve,” Draco responded placidly, so sure of himself that Harry wanted to contradict him, wanted to tell him no, not everyone is like that when they’re twelve. But then, he remembered that he, Ron, and Hermione had spent the first half of that year brewing Polyjuice Potion because they were convinced Draco was the Heir of Slytherin, and the sheer hypocrisy of saying that made him pause.
Finally, he just kissed Draco’s petty little scar and let their hands fall back to the beach.
“Whatever you say, Draco.”
A few more moments passed in silence, both of them listening to the crash of the waves before Draco spoke again.
“I like them, you know. Your scars.”
Harry had known this for a while; Draco’s hands often sought them out as though they were there to mark the places Harry was meant to be held, pieced back together under a loving and careful touch.
“I don’t like that you had to suffer to get them, of course,” Draco continued, thumb stroking over the back of Harry’s hand as if to read the words carved there through touch alone. “I truly am sorry about that, even about the hurts I didn’t cause. But I like history, I always have, and growing up I liked stories about heroes best of all. And you, you’re a walking heroic history, and I like seeing that. Of course, it also reminds me that you’re a reckless, self-sacrificing moron on occasion too, but I feel that’s just a reminder that you need to keep me around so at least one of us is looking out for you.”
And then, never one to want attention paid to him after being too nice, Draco put his head on Harry’s shoulder and indicated with every fibre of his being that their conversation was now over, and he was going to relax for the rest of the afternoon.
Harry intended to do the same, letting the sound of the waves, the steady rise and fall of Draco’s breath, and the rhythmic carding of his fingers through Draco’s hair soothe him. But, at the same time, he found he couldn’t help but turn over Draco’s words in his mind.
Harry had never really thought much about his body before - it had always done what he had needed it to do, and it hadn’t hindered him, parts/he had never had cause to contemplate himself in the way Draco clearly had. Harry supposed, if pressed, he would say that he liked how much he resembled his parents, the first people ever to love him, and the first people he lost, living on a bit through him. But hearing how Draco thought about him, what he liked about the scar on Harry that had just seemed like collateral damage in a much bigger fight, that made Harry re-evaluate his own blind neutrality.
He pulled Draco’s hand to his mouth to kiss his precious little scar again, and Draco, napping lightly beside him, moved his hand to cover the scar on Harry’s chest, and smiled in his sleep.
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closed starter 4 u nassy ♡ / @crue11
When later asked how it happened, they're going to blame it on Bangkok.
Bangkok is a far cry from Seoul. The lights are the same but there's something about the perpetual heat that makes the people appear more…welcoming. Hospitable. Never benign though for the streets and crime almost always run the same, no matter what the city.
It's for this reason alone Ga-ram keeps to themself even with Kinn's magnanimity extended their way. Well, maybe it's more of the Theerapanyakun family’s generosity that Ga-ram shies away from. Ga-ram knows Kinn and to a certain degree, trusts. The same cannot be said about the family. Ga-ram has never been very social to begin with anyways.
Again it has to be Bangkok getting the better of Ga-ram. They’re at a club- one that Kinn recommended, insisted that they tag along with the promise of getting meet potential contacts- and of course they practice the number one rule of these places: never leave your drink unattended. And that they do, but it doesn’t change that when they take a sip of their drink, it’s unusually sour even for the whiskey requested.
Minutes fly. Something’s not right, they realize. And of course, the bartender barely understands English when they ask for an angel shot. Woozy, they stumble off their seat. Where is Kinn? He wasn’t too far away the last time they checked…their vision blurs; the faces around them have blended together-
It’s luck when they vaguely recognize his wine red shirt, let alone rest a hand on his shoulder. They open their mouth. Words won’t come out. They give Kinn brief, panicked eye contact, lips barely mouthing Kinn’s name before they’re falling, falling and falling-
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Terms Of Agreement
Wander, will they ever grow attached to the little human ? If they do what would the tipping point ?
Even demons and monsters whose sole purpose is to fight to the death for souls get attached sometimes. And unfortunately for Vincent, David, and James, they will get attached to Fritz. And they will fall like domino's.
Vincent respects strength. David enjoys having his ego stroked. James has never had an opportunity to converse with someone just for the sake of companionship. So give them someone who doesn't back down when it counts, who's genuinely respectful, and who enjoys answering and asking questions once it's realized they're relatively 'safe'? And BOOM, they're powerless and will inevitably become fond of the human.
It will be a long and arduous process. One slip up, and Fritz could lose all of the progress made, and the worst part is the fact he doesn't know such a thing might be happening. Not when demons and monsters don't really show affection. They might think a nudge of the shoe is a great way to display their fondness, but just because 3 out of 4 agree does not mean the one thinking he's about to be crushed does.
But, even though they may come to enjoy Fritz's presence, he still has a soul they've been fighting over for six years, and that's something none of them will want to willingly give up. Because how far can their attachment really go in the face of power, rank, and obligation?
At least the threats will stop! Maybe.
...they won't. Not until Fritz fires back with one of his own, and the chance of that happening is the same as one of them shrinking down to human size while the door is closed.
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