#haley rambles

[haley-harrison]

gay catboy porn? you mean

nyaoi?

[moeblob]

I genuinely have a "hear me out" for Alex/Shane and have in fact told someone (who doesn't play SDV) and they said it was a pretty convincing argument so I think I'm onto something.

[moonferry]

stardew valley should be renamed neurodivergent valley because Everyone in that game has some sort of neurodivergent spice going on

and i will not be taking criticism (<- is neurodivergent and heavily relates to far too many characters for it to be a coincidence)

[justbelievinginmagic]

the sea & her moon. davy jones!kim hongjoong x calypso!reader pt 2 / previous drabble 1.5k words. barely edited.

“Ten years,” Hongjoong bit out. "It has been more than ten. years."

His look was not of devotion nor fear. It was of anger. One dark eye swirled like the clouds during a maelstrom. His eye-patch was a new accessory... and foreign to her, only serving to make him look less and less like the soft-cheeked sailor she had met long ago. His anger was equally strange.

She had never been on the receiving side of fury. She was the fury. She was the feared. She was the uncontrollable. The sea. A wicked thing. A cruel thing. A beautiful thing. But she was now simply a woman. Bound in her mortal form, trapped in the same bones that she had met him in. Her wine-red sea of a heart wasn’t endless in this form; it was a trapped organ; it toiled and bubbled and swallowed her up as its waves roughened with… guilt.

He glared as her eyes softened evermore.

“Ten years I devoted to the duty that you charged me,” his words were cutting like the pirate’s blade he now had on his belt.

Her Hongjoong had been a sailor, never a pirate. His lips twitched, a tongue rolling around his mouth as if the words that he spoke were acidic on his tastebuds.

“Ten years, I ferried those who died at sea,” he took another step towards her, nose scrunched. “And finally, when we could be together again!” His tone raised but he did not yell. “You. Weren’t. There.”

The blow to her heart was imminent. Her throat clenched, and her heart swelled like she was the beach at high tide. Flooding over her weak organ to choke her throat. Her eyes burned with salt; the very salt that made up her sea. And as much as she wanted to glance away, in shame, she did not. She couldn’t. Whether it was pride or love, Hongjoong wasn't sure. All YN knew was that she was staring at her Hongjoong - a form she had not laid eyes on in over a century and she wouldn’t let the image of him fade into the depths.

Oh, her sweet love. His face had been hardened by anger, by sorrow. Carved scars she had not bore witness to, had not kissed and soothed or bite and reddened.

She had never wished to leave him lonely; she had promised him she’d be there even if he didnt see her. She had checked in on him, bending the rules of the task at hand. She saw him while he remained blind. She had been there. Beside him, in the ocean foam, sailing beside him. Being sea-locked meant she would see him whenever she wished – it was her. He was never far. Every sparkle of the sun on the sea made her remember her treasure sailed somewhere in her waters. It reassured her while it had destroyed him.

Her absence had clawed at him; he counted down the days in marks on the lonely ship she had crafted him. The Halazia - the light she had told him. (For she thought him to be the moon and the sun.) 3,650 marks marred the wood.

He had long stopped when he turned the blade towards his own chest, carving out his traitorous mournful heart. And in the time afterwards, he had become a ruler in his own right. Cruel as the seas he said. The plentiful jewels and chains and rings and finery screamed his wealth. He’d been busy, gathering crew that were bound to him and the Halazia. They could never leave him now. And even with her in his grasp, behind bars, he faced her with a dark sneer. He wanted to look so different yet he was not. She knew him. His lone eye was stormy but she could see the familiar depth of the dark seas in them. The glimmer of light that reminded her of the sun shimmering off the horizon. His hair was no longer its long length; the mullet she had loved to run her fingers through was now shorn short. Spikey over his forehead. Earrings of aquamarine and gold sparkled in the low-candlelight of the brig. Freckles had kissed his cheeks over the years instead of her own lips. His lips… still had the same curve she dreamt about; his cheeks were still full and warm with anger.

Despite the burn of judgement, the rush of guilt, she felt in her heart a sigh of relief. Because it had been centuries and he did not succumb to the push and pull of the waves. He was not the very sailors he had once ferried. He breathed with the flush of life – even in rage, in scars, in riches. And she knew that all of this was worth it. Selfishly so.

He was alive.  

Immortal.

“Why weren’t you there?” His voice was still full of wrath, swallowing him up. But as he watched her stare at him with wonder, he couldn’t help but soften. His tone saddened at the end of his words.

And like an rip tide, he felt his emotions shift. His sorrow sparked into anger once more like a match to a cannon. How could she manipulate him so? Even now, her very presence made him melt, whine like a pup. His vacant chest shivered, fragile. He crossed his arms and glared. He wanted answers. That’s all he wanted. Why? Why? Why? She vexed him so much.

Licking her lips, she whispered: “Its my nature, Hongjoong.”

It wasn’t a lie nor an excuse. It simply was. She leaned forward, her face pressing into the bars that separated them. He tried not to flinch away; his face twitched.

“Would you still love me if I was anything but what I am?”

He jolted at that like a lightning strike in a storm. And instead of retreating, he took a step forward. His own face so close to the bars separating them. Hands intertwined over the rusted, barnacle-y metal. His hot humid breath felt like the kiss of life. She couldn’t help but embrace it. Humanity, her mortal form, made her relish these little things more than ever - even after decades of imprisonment. His eyes crashed and clashed with the waves of the ocean; she heaved in time.

“I do not,” he spat the words,” love you, YN.”

His words cut her. She had once believed no being could hurt her; she was a Goddess, a thing of power. Even in her mortal form, she held the cards of fortune. Words cried at her by mortals were follies. Silly and simple creatures acting out.

But he wasn’t a mortal anymore.

He wasn’t just a man.

He never had been.

He was her Hongjoong.

Tears slipped over her cheeks, big and fat as they poured over the shore of her cheeks. Drip, drip, drip. They joined the salt-water that broke through into the brig. The ship creaked a mournful sound.

He had never seen her weep. And he thought he'd never feel a stabbing pain in his chest again, but here his scarred chest ached at the sight of her tears. His hands trembled; he held on to the brig tighter so he wouldnt try to touch her salt-stained cheeks. So he wouldn't kiss away her suffering.

He sneered a look that was so alien to her and she realized now that she had done this. Made this.

Even in her attempts to keep her love by her side, she had somehow failed. She had thought he had known...

She felt the regret swirl; the guilt eat away at her heart like it was rock turned to sand. Her emotions were rampant as a Goddess. She knew this. Fleeting and fast, some said wild. As herself, as the ocean’s one and only, she came and went with the tides. It was nature. It wasn’t out of cruelty. Her waves had pulled her elsewhere while he waited. Waited. Waited.

Waiting was never her strong suit. The ocean was an impatient being. 10 years was both an eternity and a blink of an eye. And she had forgot to rush back to swallow him whole. But she was going to return. He hadnt left her mind. She thought he knew that. He was her light, her Moon. He was ever-present, there, even when she was gone. Her first and only love. He was hers. She had thought he knew.

She had never favored someone before. Never bestowed her affections so earnestly. She had never offered the task she had offered him to any other. The sea gave and took. YN never thought she had taken so much from him. She had stolen his mortality for their love. But she realized now in the pursuit… she had tainted his soul. And in doing so he saw his immortality for what it wasn't. A curse.

It hadnt been that… she hadnt wished that. It was supposed to be a blessing. Eternal love. Together. Sea and Moon.

But like many things, a gentle rain turned into a tropical storm without much warning. Two wild souls clashed. He had carved his heart out to be free of the torment of her absence. Heartbreak. His aching heart was locked up and tossed aside like a monster. Forsaking his duties, he plundered and pillaged and shanghaied souls who had passed at sea to join his cursed crew and ship.

He had buried his heart away on the very island they met so he’d never feel her again. That very action told her the truth. Her teary eyes rose to meet his gaze solidly. Assuredly despite her damp features. Her own hands rose to wrap around the prison he kept her in - a breath away from touching his own hands.

“Oh, Hongjoong,” she spoke his name soft and soothingly like a wave licking at the shore in the moonlight. He shivered and tightened his grip. Her sweet-salt burned him. Her tears bit at his open wounded soul and soothed it the next with her dulcet tones. His empty chest ached for its missing piece. Only proven, when she said:

“You don’t hate me.”

[fixingmydigitalfootprint]

I love Haley as a character and the concept of her storyline, but I hate how they portray her and hotch in the show. Hotch wasn't a "runaway"father, he wasn't unavailable, he wasn't a bad husband. She knew what his job entailed when she got married to him and they had a baby together, so did he. If hotch was a woman he would be the hero in the show, he would be rewarded despite being "unavailable". He canonically calls her multiple times a day, and checks in with her constantly. He's work driven, that doesn't make him a bad person. I think it was irresponsible from both of them to have a kid when they knew how busy the job was. She isn't a bad wife for wanting him home more, she handled things poorly at times but that doesn't make her a bad person either. They're both first time parents and both need a support system that they couldn't find in one another, they are just incompatible, not deadbeat parents or spouses.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Hey, are you looking for suggestions for headcanons/ short stories? If you do, how would spouses react if Mr. Qui threatened them to divorce the farmer… or else (”or else” being either he kills the farmer or something else if you have a better idea). I imagine he would want the farmer to achieve perfection and think that romantic feelings and/ or family life are “distracting” them.

Love your stories btw, especially the ✨angst✨. I read them all during one night 😅

Of course, I don't mind suggestions for short stories at all! 💖

I'm glad you liked my headcanons, thank you so much, heh 👉👈 hope you like this one too! And thanks for the ask!

So, let's begin! *Ahem* Once upon a time, in the beautiful Stardew Valley, when Farmer's spouse was relaxing on a sunny weekend day, Mr. Qi, decided to 'talk' to them about a situation that was bothering him with Farmer...

_________________________________________

"Well, well, well.... I've been waiting for the right moment for a long time, and finally we meet.... No, no, you don't know me, but I know about you everything. You, and Farmer, my chosen one, who-- oh, why the panic. I just moved us into my 'pocket dimension' to talk, soon you'll be back in your cute Valley."

"So, you are Farmer's lover. Hm, I'm surprised they chose you out of all the candidates..."

"You know, I don't usually interfere with my dear friend's trials. It is one's own effort to overcome difficulties and achieve results without cheating or someone's help. But it seems that this, hm, 'problem' requires my intervention after all."

"They've completely neglected the pursuit of Perfection since the wedding, haven't they? And I'm pretty sure you had a hand in it. "Honey, please, don't go to the Skull Cavern, it's too dangerous! I'm so worried about you, stay with me in the Valley!" Am I right?"

"Oh, no, no, no, that won't do."

"The show must go on."

"Well, I won't drag it out any further, since I'm a pretty busy man. So let's get to the point...

I want you gone."

"Yes, you heard right, and don't give me that shocked look. You need to divorce your spouse and stay out of their way. You can make up any excuse you like: I cheated on you, life on the farm is too hard for me, I've fallen out of love with you - use your imagination! You certainly have one, don't you?"

"Ah ah ah, don't. I advise you to think before you insult me. And to think about my words, because if you refuse, both you and Farmer will have to deal with.... unpleasant consequences. Farmer's gonna be the one who's in the most trouble, just so you know."

"So, I'm waiting for your answer."

_________________________________________

"Go fuck yourself." Shane replied rudely and sharply to Qi's words. He's terribly tired, his spouse Farmer is in bed after a bad trip to the Mines and they need support, his niece Jas has a cold, the chickens need wheat right away, Marnie needs help with the firewood, and he doesn't give a crap about this blue asshole telling him some bullshit about perfection and challenges. Divorce? Fuck you. Shane has his family, his niece, his aunt, his spouse and chicken Charlie waiting for him. So if he doesn't let Shane out of that "pocket" dimension now, or whatever the fuck he called that shit, the chicken man will make his own way home.

This guy thinks he can scare Alex so easily? Huh, didn't think so. The athlete has been training almost every day, and can fight back against this weakling in a stupid shiny suit. His threats don't scare him. Alex will protect Farmer and himself from this man, and no amount of tricks will help this creep. And though deep down Alex feels fear, because he doesn't know what this stranger will do now after his refusal to follow his orders, but he is ready to look fear straight in the eyes. Losing his dear Farmer is even scarier. Come on, step up to him, you coward! Afraid of a fair fight?! He will not surrender!

"No." Keeping his hands in the pockets of his black hoodie, Sebastian clutched the handle of his handmade obsidian dagger a little nervously in his right pocket. He'd always thought this thing made of the mineral his spouse had graciously given him would be nothing but a joy to behold and a box-cutting helper. The local emo never thought he'd have to defend himself against a human. Is it even a human being? Moved him here, gives his villainous monologue, threatens him and Farmer... No, he's not gonna hurt Farmer, Sebby thought. All I can do... is fight.

"I'm dreaming, I'm definitely dreaming. Time to wake up, wake up, please.... Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up..." No matter how hard Harvey pinched his arm, this wasn't a scary nightmare, it was reality. A very eerie, frightening reality where he stands completely defenseless against an unknown kidnapper. What in the world is 'Perfection'? What is he talking about? This man is talking nonsense. And he wants to hurt his spouse? That's not gonna hap- Oh, merciful Yoba, if he says no to Qi, what happens next? He'll finish him off? And then go after Farmer? His heart is racing like crazy.

Uhhhh... What did Sam just hear? "Okaaaaay, let's take a deep breath and calm down. I don't know what your deal is, but we don't have to take drastic action. We'll talk calmly, solve your- uh, I mean our problem, and everyone stays happy. Sounds good, right?" Judging from the unchanged expression on Mr. Qi's face, the guitarist's plan to solve everything peacefully failed. "Alright, plan B. What did Farmer say I should do? Left hook, right hook, and a low blow? Yep, that's it." Sammy's gonna have to fight back with his fists, apparently. He's not gonna let Farmer or himself get hurt.

"What? What are you talking about? Trials? The 'show' must go on? Divorce- Divorce?! Never! How dare you!" Shocked for a moment Elliott finally realized the meaningful of the words of this strange man who had moved him here against his will, and writhed in disbelief at the indignation and insolence of this individual. "You have no right to threaten Farmer and me! Playing with people's lives like puppets!" Elliott thrust his hands forward, clenching his fists. "En garde, you scoundrel!" Perhaps not the wisest thing for a writer to do, but he wouldn't just listen to his spouse and him being insulted.

"Bluff." Leah confidently stared Qi straight in the face, holding the sculpted hammer firmly in her right hand, the only 'weapon' she had after she found herself... somewhere. This stranger was threatening her spouse, yet just a moment ago he had called them 'friend' and 'chosen one'. "It is not in your best interest to harm Farmer or me. Not that you'll ever be able to do so." The artist was already calculating the strength to throw a hammer at the head of this pompous turkey. And before Qi could respond to such impertinence, Leah continued: "You won't hurt them. And if you dare even think about it.... you will be the one to regret it."

Confused and scared out of her wits, Penny fell to her knees instead of answering this man. She could not say a word, only sobs came from her throat. This dark, scary place, the eerie sounds everywhere, the threatening blue-skinned man, the "consequences"... "Farmer..." Something's about to happen to her. Something would happen to her beloved spouse. Penny doesn't know what to do, only crying louder. "Who are you and why are you doing this?! What-" *sob* "What do you want from us... Don't hurt them, I beg you, don't..." *hic* "don't hurt Farmer... Don't, p-please.... PLEEEASE!"

"Alright, I'll d-do it, anything you want..." That was a lie, Maru wasn't going to just take orders from a man who had somehow teleported her from the Valley to another... room? A very strange room, as if they were in outer space, but that's impossible... This 'Qi' owns some either incredible technology or something beyond modern science, and Maru is trying to play along so that she has a chance to escape from here and warn her spouse or at least someone from Pelican Town. "Easy, Maru, think, think your way out of here... Come on, brainstorm, you need to think of something... There should definitely be a way out of here."

"Merciful Yoba, help me in my hour of need, do not let evil harm innocent people.... Give me strength, merciful Yoba..." Emily held forward her small version of vessel in her left hand, bending the fingers, except for the little finger, on her other hand, and began reciting prayers. Because this 'Q'i... He's not human, but an incomprehensible entity, a demon perhaps. Poor Emily doesn't know why this demon is interested in her and Farmer, or maybe her spouse did something that caught his attention, accidental or not. Either way, she believes that Yoba will protect her and her family, so ignoring Mr. Qi's words, the blue-haired woman prays.

"You think you can scare me that easily? Come on, you asshole, I'll.. I'll... I'll cut you in half, you hear me!" Though outwardly Abigail looked formidable with the sword, her voice trembled as she spoke, and she herself was shaking with fear. The purple-haired young woman answered the first thing her heart screamed out: that she would not abandon the love of her life at the behest of some idiot who thought he could control people like puppets. But now she realized that maybe it wasn't too wise to say that, because... maybe she had robbed herself of the chance to escape this man? But if a battle was inevitable after all, she would fight. Just as long as her hand didn't shake....

A quick but heartbreaking scream came out of Haley's mouth before she covered it with her hands so as not to scream anymore and anger the one standing in front of her in this dark, scary place. She has a lot of thoughts going through her head, and she doesn't know what to do. Calling her spouse for help won't work. Refuse? Then this Qi will do something bad to her, and then to Farmer. Agree and lie? He can see right through her, can't he? He won't let her warn Farmer or Emily about what happened. What should she do, what should she do... She's quieted the crying, but she doesn't know how she's going to get out...

[allhandsonhotch]

rewatching 3x02 rn and crying bc the way that hotch was so grateful to garcia bc he was about to quit the job that he loved for his wife that was cheating on him, like the realization on his face hurt me so bad.

[mujinzzzzz]

okay so any stardew valley players, how many farms do you have and how many of them are at true perfection? because I'm on my first playthrough and usually with first playthroughs, I feel obligated to reach perfection with my first farm/first character/etc... but I'm super tempted to start a new farm because I feel like I wasted a lot of time in my first two or so years when I could've spent it like,,,, making money/food/fishing/etc and for some reason I feel guilty about it, even though I know this is a game you can take at your own pace. does that make sense??

I guess I just kinda need reassurance that not every farm needs to reach true perfection before starting a new one 💀 I feel like I didn't manage my time quite right and that I rushed the wrong things due to stress and obv being new to the game/new to farming games in general lol,,

[batbabydamian]

besides cute cat Damian i’m so curious why he goes all the way to Bludhaven, since he was turned in Gotham

based on some turned characters, their instincts lead them to figures in their lives - Bruce goes to Gotham, Harley to Ivy, and Mera to Andy

the only reason i could think of Damian going to Bludhaven would be for Dick 😭

[cottonsocks]

If Reuben’s band is is my clerical gnomance then this supports my argument that fig and the sig figs is Paramore

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

remember that post that was like, reblog this and put in the tags what actor would play you in a movie of your life? we should do that again. so: reblog this and put in the tags the actor you think would play you in a movie of your life

[haley-harrison]

just had a cishet white dude complain to me that the business world doesn't take him as seriously if he doesn't grow a beard.

mf, image being a woman in this patriarchal society. no beard cheat-code. you just gotta deal with it and let your work speak for itself. 🙃

[romeclipse]

no matter how many times you show me the elevator scene with phil and haley i'll bawl my eyes out like . that's a girldad if i've ever seen one. that one hug is one of the many reasons why i need therapy :(

[moonferry]

i so wish the spouses would like. Do something after marriage. like literally only 2-4 people in the town have a job they continue to go to after marriage .

it makes me sad that they just. give up their life from before? if that makes sense. like i love them living at my farm! but you can still have friends??? some of them only visit other people like once a month.

and when they DO visit their friends, they mention how it's been "so long" like ?? literally nothing is stopping u from walking into town to socialize??? i do it all the time ??

[ramblesbiab]

Fanfiction is messing up my life. I want to write a Stardew Valley comedy/romance parody of Farmer Wants a Wife and that would take so much time. And all I would get out of it is. A Stardew Valley parody of Farmer Wants a Wife.

It would be called “Farmer Wants(?) a Wife” because the whole time the farmer is clearly uninterested in anybody except Krobus and the focus is on the rivals to lovers relationship between Abigail and Haley because the idea of shipping them refuses to leave my mind.

There’s at least one talking head interview where Haley is like “Well obviously she’s hot, but like… I think she spent like 16 hours straight fishing yesterday? Then she waved to me while running home and passed out. Is that flirting? Maybe it’s a weird kind of flirting.”

[snowdropheart]

one minute sheee wasn't there and then the next minute there she was!