#guy who just cant fucking take it anymore
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crushes are stupid !!!! stop making me attracted to her !!!!!!!
#guy who just cant fucking take it anymore#sid rambles#our adviser just changed our seating arrangement#and by some miracle im seated at her old seat#what the fuuuuck#AND SHES ALL THE WAY AT THE BACK#NOT ONLY AM I UNABLE TO SLEEP DURING CLASS#I AM ALSO UNABLE TO SEE HER#IM GONNA CRYYYY#sorry for pining on main
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twitter is entering their "rts > likes" phase now that likes are private after they spent years calling us ungrateful for being demotivated by ratios lmao
#man fuck yall just support artists you enjoy#dont attack people who dont rb/rt your art (hell they might even have it scheduled) but also dont constantly demand ''content'' from people#ESPECIALLY without telling them that you appreciate the effort they put in to show you cool things they made for free#you should've been rt'ing/rb'ing from the START 😒 just show people you care!#im just waiting to scroll through post after post of ppl calling out ''entitled artists'' lmao#btw my opinion on the whole thing is painfully neutral if you couldnt tell#i dont think you should care that much about numbers and ppl take it wayyyyyy too far#throwback to that one guy who personally @ everyone who didnt reblog their art that was CRAZY. i would straight up report you KJFGHKG#i also understand and have personally experienced how much engagement can change your mood#a simple ''i love this!'' can make someone's day. it's not hard to understand why ppl like engagement#when they make post after post without so much as a little tag they dont care about sharing anymore#the fact that people call that ''entitlement'' is also crazy#i have a lot of drawings i havent posted or just left nonrebloggable bc it really doesnt make a difference lmao#the only ones i leave rebloggable are the ones that i Know will do well and get attention. like the little pig redraw#if it's cute or funny it gets positive attention. anything else is shit on here lmao#it's just not as fun to share. it either leads to no engagement or negative engagement#would rather have nothing than something rude so whatever#some ppl say it's always been like this but no it absolutely was not always like this#idk what exactly caused the change. probably a lot of factors#could even just be the fandoms i hang around in! but considering i've seen the same sentiment from a bunch of ppl i doubt it's that#the best solution to no engagement is to just make friends and have fun#but 90% of the internet is hostile and negative and rude for no fucking reason#when i unfollowed someone on my old public twitter and they @ me over it. damn i dont know why but NOW i know why 😭#this post has gone way off course im just ranting at this point. i havent talked in a while hi how have you guys been#work was a lot yesterday and today is too slow (im not at work im just going crazy in my house)#(and i cant leave my house bc there's construction blocking the road someone save me)#chat
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ai starbucks on doordash its so fucking over. if any company can afford to hire a photographer to take a picture of some cups sitting in water it is fucking starbucks ARE YOU KIDDING like are you joking. bye
#absolutely fucking pathetic#not like anybodys supporting starbucks anyways but. oh my god this made me so fucking angry#‘generative ai is revolutionary new technology’ WOW it has generated an image we couldve never possibly done with human hands#how else. could we get this picture of 3 cups sitting in water with some berries. this is the forefront of innovation guys#what a feat for humanity#shut the fuck up its only revolutionary for helping billionaires save a couple bucks im gonna fucking kill you#also saw the google ai thing for myself for the first time today. i cant fucking take it anymore#shut the fuck up about ai i hate it i dont want i i dont want it FUCK OFF I HATE THIS SHIT#GOD#i am not reading ur fuckass ai summary im not buying ur fuckass ai product just kill yourself man#im so. fucking sick of this bro#x#and while im at it. pisses me off that ai wouldnt fucking exist without us#without our entire lifes fucking work making up data sets#the disrepect to artists makes me want to burn the world down. you would have NOTHING without us. and you dont even realize#ur stupid fucking generative ai gets to reap all of our hard work and we get NONE of the benefits#only ones who fucking benefit from this are the billionaire ceos they should all kill themselves
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Ooku is so close to having something cool to say about gender but the second i think they might do it they curve me and have the unwell crossdressing lady's happy ending be becoming traditionally feminine and submissive to her husband who became assertive and traditionally masculine.
#the jury is still out but. im skeptical#im on ep 5 and for the last few eps the focus has been a kind of effeminate monk getting like. force masced to be a breeer for the shogun#who is a girl forced to take on her fathers name and masculine role. then raped and impregnated at 14#then the baby dies and shes back to being masc. she doesnt even have a name bc her sole role is to be her father until she can birth an heir#which is very thematically juicy!!! and she is abusive in the exact same ways you'd expect of a patriarchal ruler!#and then she forces ex-monk guy whose been mascing up to dress as a woman for her amusement#which then culminates in him draping her in women's clothing and embracing her#which is very thematically loaded!!#and had me very hopeful! but then he's shitless and built after a timeskip doing very traditionally masculine shit#and visiting the shogun who now wears womens clothing and constantly asking him if she's displeasing him#which like. there's 5 episodes left they could do something with this. its clear the lady shogun is still fucked in the head#and her grandma who did all the identity stripping and treating ppl like broodstock is still bitching that she's not pregnant#but will they stick the landing??? idk if i trust the writers man#also just on a petty personal note they ruined my insane masc blorbo. shes not killing ppl anymore >:(#im gonna continue watching tomorrow but my hopes are low#might have to rewatch utena after this#cant believe i forreal thought Ooku was gonna do some “escaping the cycle of patriarchal violence and gender” with a het couple#in my defense they have a great setup for it 😔#who knows maybe ill be surprised
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you ever hate on something you've never played/watched/read for what are still moderately good reasons given the circumstances, and then decide to go and play/watch/read the thing just to be fair. just to give it a chance
and then you were not only Right but its Worse Somehow and you're actually just more pissed off now
#liz blogs#vocaloid#this post is about project se\\kai. what a garbage ass replacement of project diva oh my god#i dont care about any of these random ass teenagers why does my vocaloid game have all these other guys in it#why are there 238928934 currencies why does it take so long to unlock new songs its just all too much and so convoluted#i wanted a rhythm game not a rhythm game that takes a backseat to visual novel and gacha game and watch 3298 ads#GET THIS OTHER BULLSHIT OUTTA HERE#i thought rhythm game on a touchscreen was a bad enough idea but i wanted to be FAIR because project diva doesnt get updated anymore#even though that was THE vocaloid game for a fucking decade and they replaced it with hot flaming dogshit oh my god#its just every other fucking mobile game im gonna start biting people#im in my Hater Year but i'm actually fucking right about everything aaaAAAAAAAAA#and look. i didn't play it for too long because it was just too fucking annoying and overwhelming. but it seems like you can only#play x amount of songs in a day before you run out of energy. which you need to Buy#you get more when you level up! it recharges! but it seems that it takes longer and longer to do that#thts the only Complaint i have that i cant actually verify because i would need to play longer and i am Not doing that#but if im right. thats the biggest load of shit of all#just go back to making project diva games. let me pay for the game so i can play interrupted without all this other BS in my face#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#the like... two little visual novel bits i saw that Just had vocaloids in them were cute. i will be real with u. but who are these like#six teams of random ass teenagers i dont know and dont care about. why did u put non vocaloids in da vocaloid game. are you nuts#maybe i just need to figure out how to mod project diva cuz at this point lord knows theyre not doing anything else with it#if you wanted to have other characters sega do u know how many Other vocaloids there are. you didnt have to invent random boring teenagers#pullin a fuckin transformers and backseating your Title Characters to a bunch of random ass humans im not here for#except you charlie watson from bumblebee i love you mwah
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#im so tired of this lalalalalalalalaa#something is Wrong lol#i really need this therapy on wednesday but guess WHAT im not going. im going to a funeral instead 🤡#and ill be singing in that stupid fucking church because have to but i dont fucking wanna i hate doing it and i hate churches#all i feel rn is the overwhelming urge to selfdestruct and like obv im not gonna kms now#but im so fucking angry that im not even *allowed* to do that anymore. like it was such a comfort all this time to know that i can just Quit#and now i cant because guess what someone has to take care of my mother 🫠 and im so fucking tired of being someone people depend on#to handle THEIR feelings and THEIR emotions and just take it all with humility and acceptance and kindness and never snap and bite back#like i dont WANNA hear about your dead husband i dont wanna hear about your stupid fucking boyfriend#i dont wanna hear about the new guy/girl who's hitting on you because you're so hot and perfect#i dont wanna be responsible for how people feel. i should just shut up and take it and be humble and never ask or expect anything back#but when is it MY turn to call at 1 am crying about how im tired and want to kms#or to start expecting shit of people and allow myself to get properly angry at them for not meeting those expectations#or to braggingly 'complain' about something the other person clearly lacks without any consideration for their feelings#or to just openly cry and say deeply personal shit without any filter not caring if that other person is clearly uncomfortable af#because *i* need it right now and i need someone to listen and let them worry about how to even respond to that stuff#im just so tired of people expecting shit of me im tired of being made responsible even tho i clearly cannot handle that responsibility#i wanna be mean i wanna snap and get angry and openly say that i dont give a shit and am tired and cant listen to this rn#but i cant because i have to be a motherfucking mother theresa and never dare to demand something for myself#and idk where that comes from. idk if it's coming from the fanatic catholicism of my childhood or my mother or just from myself and idc#i just feel so horrible and guilty and wrong for wanting anything for myself#and it once again feels like im making myself the victim and the tortured martyr here when i should just shut up and take it#i just wanna lie down and die and not care about who'll get angry or judge or blame me for it im tired and i dont know what to do#i want someone to take care of ME and reassure ME and make ME feel like i matter and that they really will help me if i ever need it#and that they'd be kinda sad if i were gone not because i had a role to fulfill that i failed at by killing myself but because i am a person#<- math calculations flying around my head as i come to the terrible realisation#of just why exactly im so deeply obsessed with my voice teacher (aside from her being literally the most beautiful woman alive lol) 🤡#like babygirl stop being so utterly overwhelmingly kind to me my knees are weak i would do anything for you queen and I MEAN IT
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Insane rant here but i hate what resident evil has become i hate how its fans are bunch of 30 yr old blue haired they/them liberals who dont even appreciate the series or its characters for what it is. You all fucking suck i miss the old days where leon was called gay for his hairstyle and weskerfield was peak yaoi
#now its just a bunch of fucking nerds and idiots and cringe bitches#for as long as i live i will never give up this url because im sure the blue haired liberals in question would use it for evil#like wow. i saw two bad takes in a row from re fans both on twitter and tumblr. you guys cant have re anymore its all mine#Remember when wesker was cool and not bogged down by idiotic ship brained fans#same with leon except its even worse bc now you have people who use him for their chaser fantasies lel#now to not personally post again for another 3 months
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me itching to post some cosplay pics i just found because i look good there but also fighting for my life to Not post them cause i dont want my face online
#plus it feels like cheating cuz i do not look that good irl. idk the spirit of a prettyboy twink posessed me during taking those photos#i would post them on instagram but they would drag me for my cool emo hair and cool emo clothes and#im talking about the time i cosplayed glitchtrap but it was hot so i went a dawktrap route with just head and gloves#and paired it up with the classic ourple guy outfit with the purple shirt and black vest and badge so it was very silly#nobody knew who i was at the con btw. except like 2 kids literally awful#you dont know purple guy????#also found some that were from a project that i fucked up on. i still feel bad about it but oh well. was meant to collab with someone for#an edit and i had to take some videos for them to cut and edit but i suck at taking videos and am terrible on camera in general so i hated#every single take and they also didnt like it iirc. told me to take more and i had enough. and then i got locked out of my account so i was#like fuck it. and i didnt get back to them later so i am the AH#i got some screenshots from it that are cool but i cant post them as that would be mean and lame and whatever#oh well i dont even remember their acc anymore but i should have apologized and explained that i wont do more takes as they wont be better#do not ask me for a cosplay video ever#made me think of how many times people recorded me at cons only for the footage not be used in the aftermovies lol
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the dichotomy of man (need to get out of this fuckin house but if i go then i can not see my cats)
#JUST realized this and now i want to kill and explode and throw up#WHAT THE HELL WILL I DO . WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO ABOUT MY FISH ok i can probably take the fish with me#but MAN#thats such a FUCKING HASSLE#ill just stay here this is fine <- tormented by the horrors. ball and chained to familiarity#the gamer speaks uwu#guy who is terminally stressed and sick about change but desperately needs it to live a life#oooo i need to be in a hamster ball everything new can just be out of arms reach and i will be safe and contained forever#no more new experiences and life changes ill cry we should all just die actually so i never have to break out of my shell#sometimes im like im therapized i dont need to go to therapy i am sooo normal and then i say shit like all that n im like nvm#the desperately averse to change braincell is funny like is it the autism. is it the ptsd. probably both#bc i sure did like have a moment of like i should just drop out of school all of this is too much i cant do it anymore#wired in juuust the right way where i can live so much better than i ever have but itll stress me out enough where i still feel the urge#to throw it all away bc it is strange and weird. and then i have to resist that urge constantly bc ill be fully like cidal again if i do th#its so weird actually. oh u have friends? u take meds? u have irls now? strange and unfamiliar and scary get rid of it all <- the insanity#anyway sucks how there isnt a word i can use in place of men/women when im like 'women will x' but for being nonbinary#nonbinary mfs doesnt hit the same . enbies doesnt hit the same either#nonbinaries b like i am free from the horrors and then go down a whole spiral at the very thought of moving out of their nightmare house#vent#i guess oops what did this turn into
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Alrighty. Off the top of my head here are potential Brokenstar babies (he has been leader for yearsss in razorverse to be clear)
-Littlecloud(storm)
-Wetfoot(paw)
-Brownpaw
-Rowanclaw
-Clawface
-Stumpytail
-Mintkit
-Marigoldkit
-Dawncloud’s kits
-Whitethroat
-Hopekit(heart)
-Wishkit(dream)
-Mosspaw and whoever his siblings were
-Much more. Most that die before getting their warrior name.
#before yall say he ruins the shadowclan lineup remember that most of these guys dont have kids and die lol#brokenstar isnt gonna be born evil or whatever but hes still gonna be extremely fucked#he grew up with a fuuucked up worldview and he basically believes that anyone ‘’not contributing’’ is a burden.#so he abolishes the elder and queen positions and humiliates and punishes those who cant keep up#he still exiles elders but only those who absolutely cannot work. like nightpelt st#is allowed to stay initially cause theoretically he can work but broken thinks he’s exaggerating his disability#and he basically made it so much worse cause he kept pushing him til nightpelt could not work anymore at all#and he went to the exiled elders of his own accord cause he just couldnt take it#razorverse
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thoseve yall who were here a year ago might remember that a year ago He was liking tweets like "idk how people can cheat when im in love im obsessed😍" and "the honeymoon stage rlly doesnt die if youre with the right person🥰" and he was liking stuff like that up till recently now shit like this is in his likes something is BROKEN in him
#i feel bad. i dont even mean it in a conceited way but i cant help but feel like a bit of this is my fault#hes so bright eyed and ambitious that the idea of him losing any of that idealism is nothing short of a goddamned tragedy im sorry#yes this is the guy who lead me on (unintentionally???) and flirted with me for a year despite seeing TWO people during that time#the latter of which became his girlfriend (who i told Everything to ...)#and like. he never apologized he never explained what was going on or why he acted like a fucking simp for a year#but basically we're not talking now and we're on bad terms and angry at each other#(me because. well yall were there for that . hes angry because i ratted his flirty ass out )#god that all stings so bad i havent talked about the details of what happened to anyone......#but yeah i just. even still after all this time i hope he stays bright eyed. the idea that he wouldnt is heartbreaking in and of itself.#that one crush situation lol#idk if theyre still together. it was early novembet i reached out to his gf and laid the whole thing out for her#& she said theyd 'take it from here' (??????) and was uncomfortable with me and him communicating with the knowledge that THAT ALL happened#even while they were together. i told her i could respect that (even though i wanted to ask her who the FUCK she thought she was. anyways)#and then i reached out to him one last time to clarify i wasnt dredging it up for retaliation or to break them up but bc she genuinely#deserved to know. then he sorta said fuck my feelings and then reiterated what his gf said that we shouldnt be talking anymore#its been radio silence since then from bothve them. if they did break up id feel bad (cause how COULDNT i?) but if they didnt.#that means the only factor that changed here was. well. his 'relationship'/chances of a relationship/flirtationship/friendship with me.#i dunno. im not gonna act like i have all the facts and im not gonna act like he hasnt screwed me over#but getting back to my main point. imagine knowing him and watching him lose his idealism. try not being heartbroken over that.
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tfw the hedgehog doesn't even know his own fate
so i'm going on an INSANE blog making spree right now, right? so it's the lowest priority. but. like. i would make a starved eggman sideblog. mostly out of spite. because everything is stupid rn w the sonic.exe mod.
#IMAAAAAAGINE TELLING THE KIDS WHO MADE YOUR MOD POPULAR THAT THEIR GAME IS CRINGE AND THEY CANT MAKE YOU FANART ANYMORE#HELLO?? HELLO. WHY ARE YOU BANNING HIM FROM GAMEBANANA#''WAAAAAAH I WANT PEOPLE TO TAKE STARVED EGGMAN SERIOUSLY SO HE'S NO LONGER AN FNF MOD WAAAAAH'' DO YOU KNOW HOW INSANE YOU SOUND ARE YOU K#HE SAYS THAT STUPID ASS LINE. HE'S JUST A RED BLOB. OWN YOUR CRINGE OR PASS HIM OFF PUSSY#LIKE SERIOUSLY THE FNF SONIC.EXE MOD DEV SHIT IS SOOOOO INSANE RN YOU GUYS DONT OWN SONIC#IM SPITING ALL OF YOUR STUPID ASSES. LET KIDS HAVE FUN. FUCK OFF
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last
for realsies
#HELLO IM VENTING AGAIN IM SO SORRY#i am sick of everything the usual but i just need some fucking therapy and my diagnosises are taking too long because the system is shit#over here and i feel like i am a literal walking disaster a hazard to myself are my meds even working anymore idk? someone needs to lock me#in a fucking wardrobe before i loose my shit and do something stupid as fuck at least im self aware ok were growing this is called growth#wow ok amazing spectacular#like tonight ive decided i hate everyone again i want to quit uni actually might do it this time i just applied for a random job for no#reason i have a job but if i have 2 then i can over work myself to the max so i dont have to go into uni#i have three weeks off so now im cutting everyone off who knows how long this episode is gonna last for#i am loosing my god damn mind i do not want to do anything everything is so hard why is everyone so pressuring#i stopped doing some of my stupid habbits but now im just going full circle again so im thriving rn live love laugh am i right guys or what#AND WHY CANT I JUST HAVE A THERPAIST WHO CONTACTS ME ITS BEEN SINCE OCTOBER U FUCKING BITCH GO FUCK URSELF#anyway im in huge amounts of pain too idk what i do in my sleep or something but my shoulders hurt so bad#i hate wet tags on clothes when they stick to you throws up actually#i had stale fucking garlic bread today and i want to move out but if i move out then things will get worse for me#why cant i maintain a normal friendship without loosing my mind and hating everyone i mean no one knows my friends are pretty good with me#they understand but i dont know#ive come to the conclusion that i am just a shit
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What Color is Your Aura?
rose vines, blood, apples, velvet, sharp nails, galaxies, dripping jewelry. your essence is CRIMSON: you are the strong, defiant and avoidant. you crave some sort of deviation; to walk in another's footsteps feels mundane, a waste of your time. you are possessive and never look back at the things you've lost or forgotten. you are the rebel. you are the one who will change the world. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of red, blush, garnet, and bronze, who share your impassioned existence. you are also drawn to the confident souls royal and gold, who will help you grow and show that not everyone seeks to break you. however, you may struggle to get along with the slow-acting personalities of navy and umber who never seem assertive about anything.
Tagged By: @compassionatekiller Tagging: @serenexgraced (for whichever of your gals you want) and WHOEVER ELSE WANTS TO!!
#;oil that tastes like blood (JIN DASH MEMES);#//tbh p. on point. 'avoidant' made me think for a moment but tbh jin is kinda avoidant as far as his true emotions go#//whether that means just not talking about how he feels or masking his anger and pain with his dumb little faux-affably evil shtick#// 'not looking back at things you've lost or forgotten' is kinda true too bc while he is big on taking revenge on the soul society#//for what they did to the bount. and while what happened to the bount genuinely fucked with him#//he doesnt really look back and long for anything or 'miss' anything or anyone.#//all the bount that were exterminated by the shinigami?#//jin feels anger for their deaths. but he's successfully compartmentalized their losses and written them off as weak#//def hates what the shinigami did to the bount and he uses that as the vehicle for driving his revenge but he's more so#//looking forward at the pain he can inflict on the soul society vs looking back and mourning anyone or anything#//at least he thinks he is LOL. the guy could probably use a team of therapists.#//the only bount he cares for anymore are those who follow him. and even then. he's so jaded inside that their deaths might#//not even phase him too much should they come to pass.#//also on point for him being drawn to confident souls. jin is very appreciate of power and skill in others and also just confidence in#//general.#//which isnt to say he cant get along with more meek or self-doubting invididuals but he def does see those as negatives#// * individuals* im too lazy to delete that previous tag and correct my grammar lmao#//ANYWAY GOOD MEME
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I should not have been taught so badly for 3 years that i genuinely have to google how to find job postings in my field. "Get a degree!! Get a degree!!" for why. To be laughed at by out of touch tutors and not taught anything? It's certainly not going to help me get a job because i CANT FIND THEM. "People will see you went here and that will give you credibility." Will it roderick. Because I now know not to trust a motherfucker who went here 💀
#rangnar rambles#taught by people who have not ever had to get into the industry in this state. dont know how to use computers. and (i cannot stress this#enough) DID NOT TEACH ME ANYTHING#I GET MY 27K PIECE OF PAPER IN 2 WEEKS AND YOU CANT TAKE IT FROM ME. SO CAN I GET SOME CONTACTS OR SM#but no yeah im so normal and glad i spent my time like this#WHAT DID I SPEND THREE YEARS OF MY LIFE DOING#if youre going to study illustration in the uk just go to falmouth. i dont go there but anywheres better than here#if [REDACTED] has no haters i am dead and have been ejected from the universe#if i could go back in time id do maths at a level and become a fucking accountant jesus christ#i had a tutor last year who used to do coke and got paid 15k to sit in front of a camera doing nothing by a mate in LA#the same guy our year got fired for being incompetent and aggressive when you asked for help (like. his fucking job)#AND HIS GIRLFRIEND. who was also a tutor and MORE INCOMPETENT#i had one tutor the whole course who had my back i love you jeremy i hope you finally get to retire and stop having to run FOUR COURSES#only man who actually had us do drawing exercises and taught us (in SECOND YEAR) how to draw perspective#so many people got to final semester and suddenly got failed bc tutors were lying to our faces about the quality of our work and not giving#accurate crit. how humiliating is that for everyone involved??#you dont want to tell us our work is shit until the grades are coming out?? and ur shocked when you havent taught anyone anything?? be so fr#it was like they were always shocked that we wanted direction and advice and our feedback was always met with 'well in the 80s there was a#big push for thia kind of open loosey goosey art course' its not the 80s anymore and students have been complainging for a decade#management would 'take on board' criticism and then bank on us all being gone in 3 years so they wouldnt have to actually do anything#all while taking our money and shutting down the entire humanities section of the uni#*actively wating wires* anyway no yeah im soo glad i spent my time like this at least i got a girlfriend i GUESS
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i would watch 4 seasons and a movie about this bitch. easily the most captivating side character
#sometimes i wish more people watched oz but i then i remember that y'all couldn't take oitnb back then#so much moaning about 'problematic characters' like thank god its not mid 2010s anymore#'oooooh vee is such a bad person' yeah. sorta the point#'i cant stand piper she abuses her white privilege and is such a bitch' oh no. maybe that's SORTA THE POINT#sorry im watching it rn and its truly fucking with me like the amount of vitriol this show got#like when poussey got killed. MAYBE THAT WAS THE POINT. just saying.#prison is horrible and terrifying and make everyone worse#and the guard and admin are the worst of them all.#anyways#erica taslitz who murdered a guy with an ax. i love you.
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