#gotta sleep cause school
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I have so much, SO MUCH stuff to do this is actually not funny anymore.
#???#the amount of work#I HAVE TWO TESTS TOMORROW#TWO TESTS ON FRIDAY#ive got classes from 8 am to 8 pm???#how the fuck does that work#when will I study#when will i eat#when will i live love laugh#I HAVE TERM EXAMS IN DECEMBER AND I SUCK AT EVERYTHINGGGG#I fucked up midterms#i can't fuck up this too#the sheer amount of backlogs#wtf is physics?#and chemistry?#and calculas??#oh my fucking god school is going to be the death of me#lol I'm a medical aspirant btw#funny how j can't even tackle my school work#fucking useless#okay bye done#gotta sleep cause school#😭#personal#ira rants#ira rambles#ira is fucking dead guys#levi wya#come get your girl
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Miguuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
#hatsune miku#vocaloid#her bday was yesterday but i was busyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy#i was gonna say i was sleeping but i was doing work#how’s school students. im gonna have to fake my death somewhere along the line#and its only week 2!!!!!!!!!!#my schedule is a lot better this semester tho. i used to go in 5 days a week from like 8-5 Do Not Do That#DO NOT DO THAT. DO NOT DO THAT. DO NOT DO THAT HIGH SCHOOL 8-3 IS DIFFERENT THAN UNI COLLEGE 8-3#you gotta run all over campus because for some reason your language class is in the math building 10 minutes away from the liberal arts#building. and im not even in liberal arts#also if youre gonna be here suffering at least take something youll like#my classmate found out the yoga cheat one year where he has a yoga course#but it’s basically a free course cause you don’t really gotta do much#rip if you actually like yoga but no one is stopping you from doing yoga#im not sure how its actually run i just know its his 3 year taking it#and hes still getting credits fir i#for it
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hi fightclub followers, I still draw pokemon.
#artists on tumblr#digital art#illustration#art#pokemon#pkmn#pokemon fan art#zubat#bat#poison pokemon#poison type#purple#kanto region#finally submited a three weeks project done in like rwo days I can finally kms#jkjk#still gotta learn for history and do italian hw#we ain't sleeping tonight guys#anyways took some time to draw something and since my hand didn't feel like doing humans I went with pokemon#I love how the pkmn hyperfixation hitting back at 16 yrs old makes me feel interest for mons I didn't give a shit abt back in middle school#like I didn't care about this thing#while drawings it I was “omg critter”#love this guy now#also did something with lighting cause I wanted to slap in colors together#I like purple with lime#1 hr doodle gone right#good night pookies#martyryo
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so sad for absolutely no reason
#👆 girl who stayed up till 3 am talking to her bestfriend about how depressed and trapped we both are for about 4 hrs#it's like that gracie lyric#you have to laugh before you start to cry😭😭#like ab toh funny bhi nahi lag raha jokes bhi nahi banaye ja rahe#oh but i love her so much i absolutely LOVE people with whom i can just be sad#im tired of people who constantly try to make the sadness go away or try to cheer me up#like sometimes you just gotta sit with your feelings na#at one point she was ranting and i said mere paas kuch kehne ke liye bhi nahi hai kyunki it literally feels like im listening#to my own thoughts on my own lying in bed at 2 am like hum itna same kaise sochte hai😭#and she laughed and was like but ye sahi hai na aise sochna like it feels wrong but it's the truth and im like i don't even#know but oh it's so good to not pretend to be okay#we're so similarly hopeless and tired cause like one point mein inevitably we talked about#the future living together our apartment and then i was like mujhe bhi ye chahiye but mujhe itni umeed uth chuki hai life se#ki koi excitement bhi nahi aa rahi like i already know ye sab kuch nahi hone wala and she's like haina same like i want to say#ki we'll do this and that but im like lol not gonna happen ab i can't look forward to things in the future im like if im living it then ok#then i can accept ki oh ok this is really happening im happy now wow but usse pehle nope#and we were talking about ki like yaar future toh ab dikhta hi nahi hai kya hoga it all feels so blurry and like a dark tunnel#atleast bachpan se we knew what was next school college but now it's like now what?#i know all these thoughts and feelings are pretty common and probably everyone's facing this but bhai.#it's fucking hard i didn't know life was gonna be like a constant battle where it kicks you down#again and again and again and you're bloody and no energy can't get up but you still have to because if you don't you'll sink#soooo deep in that state ki bahar nikal hi nahi paoge#OKAY 8 hrs sleep mandatory for me what the fuck why am i writing a ventpost at freaking 11 am girl go have lunch or something 😭
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How’s life? No pressure question ofc, but if you want to share please feel free to do so with this ask :3
Eh, it doesn't feel all that great right now. I'm tired and hungry a lot, but I just have to get a routine together. My sleep has been wonky, I've been waking up too early, but I feel fine then but it also feels like I can't rest completely- I have dreamless nights mostly. And I also just get annoyed a lot, but it feels better being around people I like.
#my father is upset today too cause I couldn't hang out with him#I talked to a social worker at school a few days ago just for check in and in my opinion I still feel bad even talking to her#it's been a rough week and I'm not sure what to do except deal with it and move on#I like to draw still#I dont want to get tired of it#I mean at least I'm doing productive things like laundry and showering#I'm gonna have spaghetti today that's a good thing#I'll have clean sheets for my bed that's good too#I got presents a day earlier and that's good#I like listing the positives#It kinda gives me ideas for writing#I really wanna eat all these positive things i mean the feeling it gives me in itself#I really love the good things I don't ever want to lose them#I'm actually gonna try to make a doll bunny today#I got dug up old fabrics in my room so I can experiment with something new#I'd list more good things but I'd sound kinda weird doing that in the tags#I should probably journal again but my mind blanks when I try but I'll figure it out#I mean poetry and fanfiction is always an outlet#I gotta practice that more often#There still a ways to go in life so obviously it'll change eventually it always does#And it's only one of many weeks so I can't be too doubtful#It can't always be the worst#Feeling the same feels awful#No matter the emotion it kinda turns numb if you feel it long enough#Days are always changing though since everybody is doing different things everyday all the time#Like most say 'it gets better' eventually#I guess I can wait for a good day#I have no choice sooo I'll let whatever happen#Well technically I can make it happen#I'll feel better when I made myself dinner and cleaned my bed and put away my laundry and put on fuzzy socks and go to sleep
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getting wigs for characters with the same hair color as myself make me feel like the biggest dumbass around but youd have me fucked thinking im burdening myself with daigos 2000's emo cut just for a weekend
#snap chats#a weekend is generous im only going to the con on saturday#i like how im making it sound like anime nyc is this weekend when its at the end of august LMAO BUT NO LISTEN#unfortunately beauty influencers have finally done their job right and this one guy was reviewing an eyebrow pencil#but the twist is that this pencil was like. SUPPPER STUPID FINE im talkin .08mm and he demonstrated how it could imitate stubble#SO OF COURSE. my ass wanted to see for myself cause as much as i like my sponge-stippling method its not super precise#and that shit gets annoying when most of it looks fine but then i press too hard or i angle the sponge wrong and now i gotta start over#In Any Case the pencil i got did exactly as i hoped and its actually p fun putting on LMAO. i prefer how it looks too#anyway how this all relates to this post. im probably gonna go as y2 daigo again for anime nyc in august#and I Repeat im not cutting my hair for that LMAO so. Wig 😩#i like it when i cosplay him cause i just go by his actual design cause if i even breathe near skinny jeans ill wanna kms#also i just like to be as accurate as i can be yk. plus the leather pants i have are cozy and theyre one of my fave pairs of pants 🤤#in any case. whenever that wig comes in ermmmmm i dont trust myself to take pictures 😞 my selfie game is dick#maybe ill stream yk2 LMAO but anyway. good night i think im gonna force myself to sleep now#i got back to my dorm like four hours ago or whatever and i am not looking forward to doing school shit again. alongside comm shit#OH WELL we ball good night#wait before i Good Night cackling as i have my meds next to my aoki tablet and plush#great reminder honestly. Take Your Meds Or You'l Convince Yourself To Be A Republican#ok goodnight fr now im gonna giggle and kick my feet thinking of cosplay
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i need to be put down but its okay cause im going to sleep anyway. keeping his jagermeister tattoo and septum piercing in my thoughts
#🗞️#i am so crazy insane about him this is truly so embarrassing I FEEL LIKE A MIDDLE SCHOOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR#truly last time i was this insane about someone was in middle school. like even my last crush that reminds me of this guy wasnt this insane#still wondering if he for real started listening to this one song that i love but he hates the artist but he still listens to it cause#i mentioned it in a joking way.......or maybe spotify hates me and is giving me false hope.#cause i started listening to so much new music bc of him and the music is so good and im embarrassed its taken me so long to listen to it#but ig you sometimes gotta meet a guy that hates one of ur fav artists but overall shares your music taste to finally start listening to#new music❤️#okay i feel unwell. head hurts. i need to go to bed not even to sleep but at least lay down.#sigh. maybe someday he will fuck me for real. cause lets be real if we fucked already id be at least 50% less insane.#🦌
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if 15 year old me could survive going back to school in person after quarantine SURELY i can handle it now right. surely.
#ive learned that when theres a year long gap between things it makes me anxious to go back#junior year of hs. going on vacation with my parents earlier this year. now starting college#IM GONNA DO IT SCARED!!!!!!! IT WILL BECOME NORMAL FOR ME AGAIN!!!!#ILL BE ABLE TO SLEEP NORMALLY AGAIN AND GOING TO SCHOOL WONT BE A WHOLE ORDEAL!!!!#i already made progress this week anyways. even though ive followed my mom TO the school (just cause im more anxious before school)#ive driven back home on my own twice already. which i never couldve imagined doing months ago#i dont really get anxious driving on my own now. its mostly just school freaking me out#but i think thats bc its still so new#i got used to driving by myself by practicing so school should be the same#must resist the urge to run away whenever somethings scary. i gotta face it and not give in
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you ever had a class with that one person who's always sleeping, not paying attention, never in class but they are still somehow passing with (almost) flying colors? teacher calls on them while they sleep in class to have a 'gotcha' moment?? but they still answer the question flawlessly???
thats him.
#puyo puyo#puyo klug#puyo lidelle#puyo amitie#puyo sig#now i just gotta do raffina to complete the fever gang!#pretty simple design since i figured he'd value comfort over being prim now#but!! he still has a (technically) perfect record in school! even homework! he is still a very proud student after all#klug is still a klugsten#tho his participation grade is //wiggles hand//#also its been forever since i tried the puyo/20th/quest style i forgot how to do it#oh but not to reduce Sig to just sleeping! i know he's more than that#its just i was trying to make klug laid back but still basically smart#and was reminded of a type of kid back in class (i was said kid in elem school)#(after elem school? couldnt be me i got so lost lol)#anyway i thought it would be funny#and i gave Lidelle klugs smartass-ness but in a more fake it till you make it way#she challenges klug cause he seemed like easy pickings but he Was Not(tm)
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HONKAI STAR RAIL MER AU! Part 1!!
Sorry for any spelling mistakes btw, writing this instead of sleeping lol
March 7th
She's a betta fish mermaid! Mainly pink with blue accents on the end of her fins. She one of the more easier mermaids of the bunch to befriend unsurprisingly, I'd imagine she brings stelle cool shells and trinkets she finds in the sea and gives them to you as gifts You better give March a gift back tho! She deserves it. She loves the jewelry from the surface and how interesting they look, especially ones with gems so Stelle does try to bring her some.
March is the reason Stelle met the others in who live in the Astral espress (it's a train the sunk underwater years ago that no one went to get back out of the ocean and the mers decided it was a decent place to call home)
March dragged Dan hung up the meet her new human friend! He wasn't very amused
Dan heng
Great white shark. NO DEBATE. MY AU MY RULES! lol jkjk. I choose a great white shark because I felt like it fit Dan heng the most out of the other fish I had in my head for him. Also, sharks a chill cool lil dudes luke Dan heng.
He would probably have some cool scars on his tail from like fights and stuff. He has long hair too, it's always down but march likes braiding it, much to Dan heng anonnyce
He was kinda moody when Stelle first met him, understandable, tho, who wouldn't be moody if their friend dragged them to the surface without telling them the reason?
He was shocked and on guard when march started talking to a human and waved to her to come closer.
After getting to know stelle and realized she didn't mean any harm to march and the others mers he calmed down and lowered his guard a tiny bit.
Stelle
She looks the same as the game but maybe a bit more eye bags because she doesn't sleep much.
Friendless kid who skips school at the beach. She gets bullied at school so she ended up skipping school and went to the beach since no one would think to find her there.
Someone did find her except she didn't know the girl and what exactly that girl was.
Over time both of them would become friends! And then she would met the other mers!!
#hsr#hsr dan heng#dan heng#mermaid au#mermaid#hsr march 7th#march 7th#hsr march#hsr au#au#MORE TO COME LATER TODAY! GOTTA SLEEP RN CAUSE OF SCHOOL
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THE PEOPLES LIKE MINE ARTTTTT AAAAAAA
#i legit screamed a lil#which is bad cause really gotta sleep#but golly golly golly#wish i could just make a buncha fanarts rn#have at least 3 really good fics/poem thingies asked and have permission to make art for#so gonna do that hopefully soon#i just need to get school work done then work on the other stuffs yes#golly geebers glob heckers am so happy constantly now what#the beuty of humanity and connection never ceases to amaze me#asked in la class for a discussion if peopkes would give the housing to people with alergies or guide dogs and insted of choosing a side#they asked questions and proposed actually really really good ideas for how to find a semi sutible middle ground#and like so many really good artists and writers and just amazing people so much more all of sudden im getting to talk to a lil#and the mutuals/artists ive loved for a wile have been getting even better at arts and im wufbsudbsh#gosh i need to find the person again cause remember they felt down about their art but its just so so stunninggggg#like is so amazing i love art i love others creations i love how can just see so much positivity in world#being a sap but i dont care people can be so good!! people want to be good!!!!!! even if horid things are happening and some people are ick#the majority will try to be good in own ways and thats smth#thats all can hope for#i may just only be looking for positives but heck it im a lil positive thinker now abd the world has such beuty in small and big thingies
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almost panicked cause i thought today was sunday for some reason. it’s tuesday
#my mind is going i stg#cause i go to school at 3pm on tuesdays so i usually sleep in#but on sundays i got to work at 12 which means i gotta wake up early and i sat up so fucking fast this morning in a panick cause i thought#i overslept
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Listen here the MINUTE I have the emotional mental and physical capacity, time (that is not dedicated to school or work or personal stuf), well being, and freedom to write something that ISN'T academically related its over for you fault lines people. I might not make you cry but I sure as hell will be doing my best to make you Think and Ponder and come to Realizations.
#chapter 13 is sitting in one of my many tabs and windows taunting me because i cant work on it rn#because i can NOT fail my classes#and when im not doing school im at work#but rest assured that monster will be finished sometime#and if it doesnt make you feel something or cause you realizations i have Done Something Wrong#recovery is long and hard#ro rambles#listen i would be sleeping rn but i have two speeches ive gotta finish by tomorrow#and Multiple tests and projects and make up work due this week#so yall have to deal with my complaining lmao
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sitting in my car for a few minutes before class for my own peace of mind. truly an experience that cannot be recreated without a car. i didn’t get it as a child but now that i’m an adult i fully understand the “sit in your car for at least fifteen minutes after getting somewhere” impulse. truly integral to the american experience
#valentine notes#this is gibberish. as it should be#vibes were weird last night and this morning i have ascertained that i might have something going on emotionally! so#i’ll try nd be a good adult and parse that out during class :)#might also be a little sick. i’m feeling physically ok but i have sick throat + i had to pick up my little brother yesterday from school#cause he was feeling sick. so.#not covid obvi! but wearing a mask to class anyway#got a really good night’s sleep last night though. that was nine or ten hours of goodness. let’s hope it kicks in :)#gotta drink more water today too haha. checklist :)
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Meeeeeeeeeeeeee. Im actually about to do this tonight. I have a history paper due Wednesday that i have not touched. It shall be a coffee on coffee on coffee on energy drink kinda niiiight
"use chatgpt" that's the devil talking. buy four caffeinated drinks and pull an all nighter. this is the way.
#i had to take nyquil last night cause im sick#i have more energy today from the massive amount of sleep thanks to the nyquil than i have had in a long time#this paper is gonna get so finished#gonna play sims for a bit first tho lmao#gotta have enrichment time in my enclosure before i do MORE schoolwork#everything i have to do this week for school is completely done except this paper#boop
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chat it’s been over 24 hours and i’m still not locked back in i’m cooked
#oh my goooooood#i can’t stop thinking about it#i never understood the hype before i did it but DAMN i get it now#i’m so cooked omg#school tomorrow is gonna be crazy idk how im supposed to focus in class with him#it’s fine i gotta lock in#im sad that we don’t have drama rehearsal :(#anyways let’s hope i chill out a bit cause i couldn’t sleep for a few hours last night#im being so dramatic about this but AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#i’m crashing out#anywayssssss
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