#got a pretty good grade too
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i officially have my bachelor's degree!! woohoo 🎉
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Hi! How did you manage to get admitted at a LA uni as a foreign student? Any tips?
Good grades and trauma to talk about in my essays lol. I had a 1480 SAT with a 1460-1580 range on mock SATs and a 43/45 IB score plus a sad story to tell on my essays. You need good grades and preferably be a good writer too.
#I think by senior year I had 7/7 grades in all my subjects at school so that was pretty neat#a strong report card really helps#then make sure you have a strong essay#good grades are important but they aren’t anything#I got rejected by plenty of universities too#I was rejected from Smith College like what
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surely if I just never check my grades then they're never finalized, right? like my grades don't exist if I don't perceive them, right? I think I'm right.
#I got a notification of grades released today#I have not checked#I cannot bring myself to check grades I get too anxious#I need someone else to check my grades and react for me#If it's good I'll check if it's bad I don't need to know#You know what this means#Charlie 👉👈 check my grades pls 👉👈 pretty pls 👉👈#I am incapable 👉👈#💀💀💀💀💀 I hate uni. I like uni. I hate uni. But I like uni. But I hate uni
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The plus side of being too busy to watch shows or get super deep into any games is that I’m so active that my only media consumption is audiobooks at work and at school so I can finally get in on all those funky book fandoms!!! :D
#lifeblogging#so…. darkstalker huh?#i’m in the middle of his book and goddamn#HOLY SHIT its great#loving it 10/10#im also gonna listen to warrior cats maybe when im donw with it#cause i gotta brush up on my cat lore#i have so many books on my list its not even funny-#and i still have to do wayward children and percy jackson too!!!!#and i mean- dont get me wrong an active life is still pretty enjoyable#im actually getting regular exersise now#and working really hard#and getting a higher education#im doin everything that can be considered ‘normal’ and its kinda fun#its like im playing some fun game of pretend!#like how you play house as a kid#only its life!!!#i’ve gameified it a lot#and its going great#but i havent been able to exist as much online#which is maybe good#but yeah! getting caught up on all them books#its really enjoyable actually#its like- even though im working and doing all this nonsense and studying#i can still BURN through media like a wildfire and make tons of ocs and self inserts and fanfic#and then also do my schoolwork#and like- i REALLY enjoy school sometimes cause i getca lil dopamine rush everytime i get high grades#which is often#i feel so smart and so awesome#i completed 2 quizzes in under 3 minutes and got hundreds on both
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Went to a therapist today for the first time in a few years! They’re nonbinary and a year younger than I am (💀) but they took me seriously when I described my Issues (I’m mostly there for ADHD reasons…family things will have to wait) and seemed on board with pursuing a diagnosis so I’m really hopeful, genuinely
#they’re also like a full head shorter than I am#I picked them bc their gender yeah#and I’m their bio they sounded like my kind of nerd#I’m not there for gender stuff cuz I’m actually pretty ok with where I’m at with that#but I think the fact that they’re also nb makes it easier cuz like they get it even without me hashing it all out LOL#and ofc bc more similar life experiences#I had been vaguely worried that we might be TOO similar but they’re professional and capable and clearly know their stuff#so I’m hoping it’ll be all good#me stuff#I really can’t believe I finally got past the executive dysfunction well enough to actually start treating my executive dysfunction lmao#also I filled out the paperwork before the appointment and they were AMAZED that I did#I have gotten a good grade in therapy for the week LOL
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Also I got my essay exam back today. Full points!!! Which was a surprise bc my 4th essay was definitely lower quality than the other three (bc I rushed it), but still good enough to get full points!!!!
Makes me wonder what that other one I spied being a 1 was like 🤔🤔🤔 bro was NOT good at writing I guess.
#speculation nation#weird grading scale. each essay was rated 0 thru 3. 0 being Real Bad or just plain wrong.#1 being Okay. 2 being Good. and 3 being Excellent. according to what my professor explained.#and all the points for all 4 essays were totaled. so since i got 3s on all 4 i got 12/12 points.#but he also said it's not like percentage based for the grades. 3s earn As 2s earn Bs and 1s earn Cs. presumably.#so even if u got a 4/12 thats not failing. still not very good tho.#i realized when i was writing that it really has been a while since ive done a proper essay. im a techie not a literature student.#i do scientific reports so much more than fucking Essays.#i tried to dust off the old skills tho and i guess i did pretty good overall. tho i wonder. it feels like he was pretty lax in grading.#bc im being honest my last essay was Not Good in structure. i was rushing bigtime. i just wanted it done.#but i guess bc i answered all the questions and was generally good at diction (creative writing Does help with this)#it was still good enough to be a 3. which makes me So Curious how bad that person did to get a 1......#i only caught a peek when i was grabbing mine. couldnt look too in depth.#ALSO THO tuesday's presenter got a 7.6 As Opposed To my 8.6!!! professor gave them a 7 (as opposed to my 8)#which makes me feel a little better about how i did. (this scale out of 9 lol). bc like. i did better than them at least!!#felt a lil bad for today's presenter. she was clearly getting kind of frazzled. it rly is hard to present for an hour.#we write out critiques for every presentation. stuff we liked and stuff we didnt. unfortunately i had criticisms to give 😔#but i try to sandwich it with good things too. so it's not All bad things. i still feel bad critiquing them#but such is the review expectations. i try to at least be fair about it.#(to clarify. grades arent announced to the class. i just sit right up front near where he puts the papers and im Nosy lol)
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if the craigslist person doesnt match the vibe ogf this fucking ridiculous show the next ep will be first of all extremely awkward, second of all extremely fucking funny and last but not least it will make us want to die💥😊
#posting this after ive been to my exam so future me howd we do#im feeling pretty confident#expecting like..#a good grade. a rly good grade#its like biochem or whatever idk its cool#bet u guys wetent expecting all this personal life drama. when u saw this post but too fucking bad#im waiting to get my grade rn i think it webt.. ok#LETS GO LADS U GOT AN A#OR WHATEVER.. THATS BOT HOW WE GRADE HERE BUT IT EITHER MEANS A OR A+ OR WHATEVERR#anyways.. better go text my family then!!#dndads#dungeons and daddies#anyway yeah craigslist person better be funny BECAUSE IF THEY ARE YOU KNOW DAMN WELL THIS FANDOM WILL NEVER FORGET ABOUT THEM#the only thing that could make my day better?#oakworthy becoming canon.#PLLEEEEASSDEEEE
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good luck!! 💕🥰
thank you! i didn't get the best grade i've ever gotten but i didn't fail either and this class has been so terribly rigorous that that's literally all i care about so 😭
#i got like a 76% on the mc questions but most of the points come from the essay questions she hasn't graded yet#and i think i have a p good chance of finishing the class with an 85% or above which i think is pretty good!!!!#i've never been too obsessed with straight a's i'm just happy to be here honestly
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had a conversation about gym class with my friend who I went to school with today - it was depressing but also nice to hear that her experience with it (at that particular school) was just as bad as mine.
I don't think the way my school treated gym class was entirely normal tbh. it was completely different to the school I went to after, anyway. and everyone I talked to there only knew gym class to be a pretty fun, lighthearted thing. at my old school it was only about achievement, you had to be perfect, if not you were usually yelled at. and if you couldn't participate because you were feeling a bit ill (but not enough to stay home from school) you were ridiculed and/or insulted in front of the whole class. this happened with every gym teacher we had over the whole 9 years there.
it felt like two hours of punishment, there was nothing good about it. and it made at least the both of us feel like any kind of exercise/sport, especially in a group setting, was terrifying - for years after. even my much more positive experience at the other school I went to didn't make that go away.
#maybe my school really just sucked#I mean I already know it did. but maybe it did in even more ways than I thought#maybe it's a Gymnasium thing. idk. any Germans please feel free to comment if gym class at your school was like this#and it wasn't just because we were bad at sports or anything. I got very good grades in gym class at the other school. and my friend does a#ton of different sports now and everything#I remember there was a girl in my class who got a 1 (the best grade) in every other class and a 4 (out of 6) in gym class. and the teacher#was so fucking awful and gleeful about it. he made fun of her so much.#I'm pretty sure I was about to get a 6 in gym class right before I dropped out - and that definitely played a part tbh. I just couldn't#spend one more second with that gym teacher. he was horrible and gross and mean (and sexually harassed girls at another school! but of#course he was still allowed to teach at our school!! ľ#anyway. gym class was the worst part of my (already not great) life from 11 to 19 so I hope all my old gym teachers break both their legs :)#except one. he was really nice to us and didn't do any of the stuff the others did. but we only had him for a year in between all the other#ones so it wasn't enough :(#like one of our (female!!) teachers would loudly make fun of girls who said they couldn't participate because they were on their period and#in too much pain.#in front of everyone. when we were like 13.#I hate that woman more than any of the others.#lol it's funny how like half of my issues are because of my parents and the other half is because of that fucking school#I will never forgive my mother for forcing me to go there and never letting me change schools even though I asked to for 8 fucking years#personal
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thinking abt when they made us take a chemistry test and then kind of just went. well. goodluck. cuz we had barely learnt anything n they realized that.
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cannot stop thinking about the lady at work who told me my hair looked really pretty today like girl what's your ring size i'm on the phone for the marriage license as we speak
#literally almost just said 'you too!!' which was TRUE but the woman (me) was too stunned to speak#but it's ok i loved her sparkly blue nail polish and she smiled at me when she left#so i think that means i got a good grade in impromptu social interaction dndbxbshznnxnd#anyway not to be a lesbian but if pretty women want to tell me i'm pretty on the clock who am i to stop them asbsxhhshwhs#the maddie diaries#ignore me my coworker said she knows people who married patrons and i think about it every time smthg even VAGUELY flirty happens to me#rest assured i'm far too autistic to actually read into these interactions but a girl can dream <3
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#I just showed my mum that i graduated university my final grades were posted last night and I got a great mark#all she said was ‘oh congrats.. can you turn the lights off on your way out?’#dunno why I brother trying#anyways I’m done with my bachelors degree and gpa is pretty high too I’m very proud of myself because it was a tough journey#i know it’s pitiful to not have anyone to share this news with#I’m gonna try having a good day and maybe buy some ice cream to celebrate
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i suddenly know what im doing actually, good job brain
#also half an hour earlie i told my mom that i dont knwo what im doing with my thesis#and that i looked at my previous grades and that i have mostly gotten 1.7s and some 1.3 on papers#and that i read over one of them and it was pretty good i guess i am smart? but i feel soooo dumb lol#the one that is closest to my topic too and i got a 1.3 on that one PLUS the points i made in the discussion part were really good actually#i think the structure my examiner made with me makes more sense to me now#i have to read luhmann and giddens now tho#i always think ugh i dont want to read every original text why isnt the text im reading about them now enough#but the originals make way more sense usually#anyway i recently found out that the only master's program that would be interesting for me at some point is waaaay too expensive#so at least i wont have to think about doing that for a long looong while#sorry for the rambling
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crazy how i’ve never known a time when i wasn’t masking or overperforming in order to impress adults, so for the majority of my schooling no adult in my life ever noticed there was something off about how i interpreted and interacted and that it was not easy to keep up with the pace they expected me to be at, or they willfully ignored it because some woman when i was seven had told them i was supposed to be too smart to struggle
#then there was the fact that i had internalized this by about fifth or sixth grade and i never wanted the other kids to look at me like they#were already starting to; i.e. a weirdo they wouldn't want to be friends with#but this sentiment only occurred to me when i was around ten by which time it was DEFFO too late#because i'd been being blissfully weird for the past five years at that point and they knew that#i spent most of middle and high school now also masking for the benefit of my peers in a all-hands-on-deck attempt to Be Likeably Normal#it was the most crucial thing in my life at the time. i had to be liked by every group of kids i couldn't carry the stain of Weird Kid#or i felt like it would completely end my life#i hung out with a set of alt kids and they had a reputation i was trying to break away from as 'too weird to be likeable' they were all very#like NICE and COOL and for the most part able to keep up with the fact that i didnt know any of their alt interests#but if i acted like i liked them too much then i'd be ostracized from the approval i *really* wanted so i was a pretty bad friend i think#not to their faces i just. was always looking over the fence so to speak#i stopped associating with jon or any of the other kids who (by then i knew) probably shared my neurodivergences#because that was the lowest social rung and i couldn't be seen there without ruining my chances at Being Respected#so no tss's who would help me with any emotional issues no being friends with jon no talking to anyone in that camp#so there's never been a time in my life when i wasn't constructing a type of person to be interacted with by others that they'd approve of#and i guess i got fairly good at it because it's basically my Self now but i wish it wasn't sometimes#then again that would open up a whole new can of problems
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they did not have to go this hard omg
#tye spoilers#they really said: let's have sad animation for the entire season but Kahaku can have amazing facial expressions for a second 😎#AND IS THAT NEW MUSIC I'M HEARING#IT GOES VERY HARD TOO#...i wonder if the 'i want it to end' is a poor translation on the subber's part?#i'm pretty sure i've got official subs here#but in both the weekly and volume release of the manga#he says something more along the lines of just wanting to rest/have some relief#now he just sounds suicidal (esp with his more extreme facial expression here. manga fushi just looked exhausted)#not that I don't absolutely adore a more suicidal aspect being given to a character#especially since his earlier tone of suicidality wasn't very well emphasized in the anime imo#also good fucking god the color grading on these gifs is atrocious#my internet is being weird so i had to use clipchamp and it shows :(#ALSO I NEED TO GO WATCH HAIRO'S BACKSTORY SCENE AGAIN#BECAUSE EVEN IN THE MANGA. I NEVER REALLY UNDERSTOOD IF THAT WAS INDEED TASSETTE???#his entire backstory doesn't make a lick of sense but sjdhgfdjsjhdegydhdiye was that actually tassette???????#hmnbnmnbn there's three episodes left but i really think there's only 2 episodes worth of manga content#but i'm bad at estimating#like surely the next ep won't be ENDING with Bon's death right? and maybe they'd dedicate an ep to the aftermath of that#but then what.....#also i still can't tell if kahaku was lying. more just...panicked and making excuses up on the spot?#just a frantic 'it's not what it looks like i didn't mean it!!!' type vibe
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watching warrior nun may do thoughts as a post after each episode (thoughts in the tags)
#first ep all in all a solid 6.5/10#intrigued w where it's going and thoroughly impressed with the cinematography and colour grading#esp the scenes in the church an stuff also visual effects look good! didn't expect the budget for it to be so much#however uh felt like we're kinda tiptoeing around the main juicy stuff i wanna get to? good for ava getting out there doing fuck all but#feels meandering and distracting. also diego man idk what kid talks like that#whenever it got to one of the church scenes my interest piqued like that's what i like!! plot i'm interested in and pretty lighting!#i am. mildly put off by ava but hey i'll prolly get used to her and i am interested how it unfolds! onwards!!#(am i being too critical on the first ep? probably but nevertheless let's GO >:D)#cat watches warrior nun#personal
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