#god why is he kinda bad..
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life was so simple when hamilton first came out
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Trying to get yourself to finish a drawing while combating a 3 year long art block kinda feels like dragging yourself by the hair-
#im tryingggngfjdsgj my god am i trying#moominvalley#moomin#moomintroll#snufkin#snufmin#kinda#this was originally a much bigger drawing but i didn't like how it looked so i cropped it#listen hgfjdks its a struggle#say hi to my dad he follows me on tumblr i still dont know why#im probably just gonna make myself draw characters i like until drawing doesnt feel as bad as eating my own hand#anyway :3
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silly thingy
@blackkatdraws's sillies
#Bro think an “i love you” isnt enough#maybe it aint enough though#i took Black's name a lil bit too literal#i mean i've seen he kinda works that way?#the drawing made me feel a certain way that makes me sad#like everything related to blank scripts's stan#i have a ton of conflicted feelings surrounding Black's character rlly#mainly cause idk and its mostly theories#and all my theories point that he is an obviously bad person#but thats just his nature#he aint human why would he act like one#why would he have the same morals as one#you really (at least to what i've seen) dont know much about his past#you dont know how he could've developed so therefore you have no way to know how he'd turned out like this#And with Stan you kinda know#who would be in their right mind when they r stuck in a place like that#he fell in love with Black cause of his eminine features and cause he kinda knows him since he has been stuck in that place with his voice#for god knows how long#why didnt he fall in love with Mariella then?#maybe cause she aint feminine enough or maybe cause she didnt fit his standars or whatever#maybe is the time they met#i think is knowledge too#Like Mari actively chooses to be ignorant in a ton of cases#and Stanley CLEARLY sees it#like the fucking eyes drawing that i keep cominfg back to#ALSO I'LL MAKE A REBLOG TALKING BOUT IT MORE#the stanley parable#blank scripts au#tsp blank scripts au
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How do we feel about Beach wear Noritoshi....
Everyone thinks he'd go covered head to toe wearing those wet suits divers use, but no. Noritoshi isn't the type to want to attract attention to himself when it's not needed, so he'd try to blend in. Emphasis on try.
He's the guy wearing a covering or some shit. I think you'd have to fight him to wear a translucent one. (if you splash him with water, you'll acheive the same effect thoughahahaha) even though it's a beach, he's trying to find an appropriate way to cover up, hes just like that. yes to sunscreen ofc. I can see him in a sun hat, but it's not his.. maybe he took it from one of the girls
HIS HAIR WOULD BE UP BC ITD BE TOO HOT AND THE SUN HAT WOULD HELP HIM FROM GETTING OVERHEATED H.H....H IS FACE WOULD BE FLUSHED BC OF THE HEAT AND. AND. AND.. he's like the beach babe on the shore, soaking up the sun and reading a book or smth. if you splash him with water, i can see him trying to get you back. then boom bam, hes in the water with everyone else.
OH FUCK that's even IF he goes to the beach. it's like seeing God in the flesh, idk man I'd go blind........... hed probably come along when he realizes theres hot people at the beach. he cant have you looking at people in that state, hold on hes going. give him five minutes..!
EXTRA
[untied covering version under the cut. like his booefjehsaf are out aha.]
ahahahahahahahahaa *froths at the mouth*
mf dont even begin to look at me like that
#kamo noritoshi#noritoshi kamo#noritoshi#kamo noritoshi x reader#noritoshi kamo x reader#noritoshi x reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#FAM IMA BE SO FR W YOU. ITS SO COLD WHERE I AM RN#AS OF POSTING THIS#BUT ITS FUCKING SUMMER SOMEWHERE OUT THERE SO LETS FUCKING GO#IM TELLING YOU WHEN I FUCKING SAW THIS ASK I FROZE#HOW ARE WE FEELING?????#FAM WE'RE FEELING FUCKING DEAD AND RESUSCITATED#GOD I FEEL LIKE YOU ANSWERED MY PRAYERS OR SOME SHIT BC I WANTED TO TAKE THIS MANS SHIRT OFF SO BAD BUT NEVER HAD A PROPER EXCUSE#OFFICER. GOD. TUMBLR STAFF.... THIS IS PURELY FOR THE SAKE OF ANDSWERING MY BELOVED CULT MEMBER'S QUESTION#I SWEAR THERE IS NO OTHER UNDERLYING REASON#OFFICER PLEASE#nah its embarrassing how hyped i got for this ask#you got me wide awake at 8 am bc of beach wear......#I WANTED TO SHOW HIS WAIST BUT THE FUCKING STUPID COVERING BLOCKED IT ALL.#WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME @ MYSELF?!??????#DOES THIS COUNT AS SUGGESTIVE????#NO. ITS JUST HIS CHEST. DONT LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT 👊💥💥👊💥👊💥💥#HOW COULD I FORGET ABOUT THE NORITOSHI THAT TEASES YOU BACK...... IM SUCH A FOOL. GOD STRIKE ME DOWN RN......#DUDE I DABBLED IN IT A BIT HERE BUT OH MY FUCK.... IT NEEDS AN ENTIRE POST OH FUCK#tysm anon I'll love you till my heart rots#you dont understand my devastation half way through when he kinda looked like beach geto. pinterest if you ever get your filthy paws on thi#and call him geto. istg ill gut you alive#null rot
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RealAgeAu Drabble - Shopping
I am back at it again because I had ideas. (don't worry friend @spotaus things are being planned and I got many many ideas :3 but before those happen stuff needs to be established and put in place!)
I was debating between like four different drabble ideas but settled on this one. Something calming for a bit :)
First Drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble
as always. No editing and no beta.
*-------------------*
Dust shoots Killer another glare as he holds Nightmare clsoer "I mean it Killer. get out of my blindspot. It is getting annoying."
Nightmare looks from Dust to Killer and sees the large grin on Killer's face as he skips after Dust and Nightmare "Nah. I think it is good i am here because it is your blindspot!"
Dust grumbles as he holds Nightmare clsoer. Nightmare just pushes his skull under Dust's chin as he listens to the two bicker. Dust gives him a quick nuzzle before shooting Killer another glare "Why are you even here?" Killer still has a large grin on his face "I am backup!"
Dust groans "I am getting Nightmare clothes."
Killer nods as he follows them "backup!"
Dust huffs before looking back at Nightmare. Nightmare sees the glare disappear from his face as Dust lets out a sigh before smiling at Nightmare "makes you start to wonder who helped who out of getting stuck in a wall."
Killer gasps loudly "That only happened a few times!"
Ngihtmare grins and laughs as he leans fully against Dust again. He likes being held by Dust and Dust must like it too because he always holds him.
Nightmare figured it was because his spine is fragile and walking for too long starts to bother him but Dust still just holds him. always. Maybe he also likes being close like this?
Thoguht Nightmare isn't sure what Dust gets out of it but he must really like something abut the close contact.
They walk past another few people who look at them. Nightmare shoots a glance as Dust and Killer continue to bicker. They seem to shoot Dust and him worried looks but chuckle once they realise that Dust and Killer are just doing their way of bonding.
Nightmare always thought the flirting between those two was weird but then again he thought most things dating was weird. Maybe because he was still a child in his soul...
Not that it matters.
Nightmare shoots a glance and spots Killer grinning widely as his soul is clearly in soulshape and looks stable. Dust may have an annoyed look on his face but he has a tiny smile on his face.
Nightmare hides his face in Dust's sweater but he can't hide the purr. He wants them to be happy. They are happy even with him near.
Dust notices of course nad gives him another nuzzle "comfy? Spine okay?"
Nightmare nods "Yeah."
Dust hums to signal he heard him but still rubs his back.
They finally stop near one of the smaller houses which is the clothing shop for this town.
Dust tilts his skull as Killer snorts "oh that is adorable. ready to dress Nightmare as a tiny old man?" he grins
Dust shoots Killer a glare "It isn't that bad..." then he looks at the store "just... a bit old fashioned..." he looks at him "That okay?"
Nightmare nods before shrugging "I don't get why i need new things..."
Dust sighs. Killer leans on Dust's other shoulder and shoots him a wink "Because you are still wearing Dust's things. and quite honestly. Dusty does not have a large enough wardrobe to dress both of you."
Nightmare frowns as he pushes clsoer to Dust. He doesn't mind wearing stuff them them. It are things that are well worn and soft and smell of them and old laundry detergent.
Dust nuzzles his skull "It will be nice. You can check what you like and what feels nice and is comfortable."
Nightmare frowns "it is expensive." which is another reason why he doesn't want to get anything.
Dust frowns and Killer quickly answers "That is a worry for us. And Dusty said it is fine so it is fine." he grins.
Dust nods "made some money. more than enough to get you some things."
Nightmare wants to disagree more but Dust walks into the store.
The inside isn't like he thought it would be. there is actually quite a number of nice looking things and looks more modern than you would think from the outside.
DUst makes a pleased sound before smiling smugly "Seems like they were just showing off the knitwear because it is autumn." he shoots Killer a look "Almost as if i did my research and knew it would be okay here." and he walks further into the store.
Killer sputters before following them "I know that Dusty! You always do that! I was just joking around!" he pouts but doesn't offer anything. Really just a shadow. It reminds Nightmare a bit about how it was before. Killer beign his right hand and always by his side to help and protect him. It still feels different now and even when thinking back to those memories they feel different.
Killer spots him looking at him and grins before wriggling his phalanges in a tiny wave at him. Nightmare huffs and pushes back closer to Dust.
Dust is looking through some clothes on the hanger "Stop bothering Nightmare." he pulls something off and looks it over critically. he holds it up for him to inspect and Nightmare just shrugs.
Killer pouts as he crosses his arms "Just having fun. And tiny boss is fine with it!" he grins at him "Right nighty?"
Nightmare shrugs. he doens't mind. it is nice.
Dust rolls his eye lights and doesn't look at Killer "Even if he is fine with is safe it for later. first buying clothes. Then you can tire him out."
Nightmare huffs and grumbles. he doesn't need tiring out. he is perfectly fine. Dust holds up another sweater and he shrugs again.
"Oh hello there dears! Can you find it all?"
Killer nad Dust turn and Nightmare feels Dust freeze for a moment. Yeah not a surprise because the woman looks a lot like Toriel. But Nightmare doubts it is the her of this universe. The closer he looks the more this woman seems like a sheep monster.
Killer and Dust must see it too as Killer grins "Pretty much! but we got it!"
Dust shoots him a look "Killer knock it off." he looks at the lady "We are looking for stuff for the little guy."
The lady smiles sweetly "Oh! You two must be two of Sans- I am sorry, Crop's friends!" she looks them over and her gaze lingers on Dust for a moment before settling on Nightmare. Nightmare can't stop the instinct of holding on tighter to Dust. He doesn't like having stranger's gazes on him.
The smiles sweetly "I can see the resemblance! You must be very proud of such a young handsome little boy!"
Dust looks to the side and shrugs but his hold on him tightens. Killer snorts, which is fair as they aren't actually related. Maybe she just sees the resemblance before Nightmare now looks much more like a tiny swap sans, as that was the original form his mother used to craft their bodies. And Dust is the one of the four that still resemblance who he used to be.
At elast Nightmare assumes that is why people think they see a resemblance. That or they are just racists and think all skeletons look alike.
the woman smiles "I am sure there is something fitting for him. Do you need any help?"
Killer's laugh turns cold as he smiles widely "No thanks! We got this!"
Dust rolls his eye lights and nudges him in the side "Stop it." he looks back to the lady "I was wodnering what the... organisation was. I wanted to look at stuff his size..." and he looks at the things he had been looking at with a glare.
The sheep monster looks a bit paler after Killer's interaction but smiles sweetly at Dust. "It is a bit of a mixmatch. Of all the stuff that is handmade it only has a few of each size. you will have to guestimate those. The imported clothes are by the walls, those have more standard sizing."
Dust nods "I see." and he starts walking towards the side first to check the sizing.
Killer grins as he leans close and whispers "Holding a babybones does wonders for making you look approachable"
Dust shoots him a glare and hisses "One word and I will put you in a wall myself." and he stomps over towards the clothes.
Nightmare still doens't understand why Killer thinks that kinda flirting is efficient but what does he know.
Dust is clearly unimpressed with the clothing offered with the more standard design and fabric. but they use it to figure out which size he is before moving towards the handmade stuff.
DUst and Nightmare check what is nice and soft as Killer shadows them. Staying nearby and pretty much glaring at anyone who as much as glances in their direction.
They end up settling for two big sweaters and some sweats. They wait by the cash register as Dust has picked him up again.
The nice woman smiles at them "That will be 140!" she smiles.
Killer winces at the price and Nightmare pushes closer to Dust "I don't need two." wool sweaters are expensive...
Dust shrugs as he looks at Killer "Be usefull and hold him for a moment." and Ngihtamre feels hismelf be handed over to Killer. Dust takes out some cash from his inventory and counts quickly before putting most of the stash he had on the counter "That should be enough." he stashes whatever is left.
The lady counts it and smiles as she puts it away. She packs it in a bag and holds it out to Dust "Thank you for shopping! And Can I just say it is lovely to see such a devoted father."
Dust shrugs and mutters a thanks before shooting Killer a warning look.
Killer grins as he nuzzles Nightmare "How are you this huggable tiny boss?"
Nightmare shrugs but holds unto Killer. Killer is also nice to be held by.
They leave the store together and walk back towards the parking lot. Something about meeting up again to go back to Crop's farm. Nightmare isn't really sure. He is already getting tired again adn he mumbles unhappily.
Killer purrs and coos "It is okay tiny boss. babybones need their sleep and rest after all."
Dust nods "Shopping is always busy." he shoots Killer a glare "Why is why i didn't want you to get him tired or overwhelmed."
Killer groans "Yeah yeah you were right. you are always right. can i go back to nuzzlign the baby now?"
Dust looks considerate before nodding "You may."
Killer grins and the nuzzles resume and Nightmare wants to pout and push him off but it is so nice and he can feel himself start to relax as he starts to purr again.
He likes it when his family holds him.
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#realageau#utmv#nightmare sans#deaged nightmare#dust sans#killer sans#What is this?! An actual lore reason why Nightmare is carried all the time and everywhere?!#aside from the fact everyone wants to hold and snuggle the baby#the baby also has a really bad and fragile spine and walking and putting weight on that is a bad idea. so they minimalise it unless it is i#a safe area where they can monitor it easily. like at home or the temp base they set up!#outside though is not safe so it is time to 'Hold Baby'#Nightmare is A-okay with it!#Nightmare is also aware all these four disasters kinda flirting and being interested in one another but doesn't get the big deal#Look this baby lived together with those four while nightmare was still an empath#There is no way he WOULDN'T know#Just something a bit sweet and nice to relax after the other drabbles :3#Also don't worry about them starting to physically resemble one another! After all! I am sure soul adopting a baby doens't have consequence#especially not if said baby is a god! :D
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it just hit me that the movie is coming out next month imgonna throw upppppppp
#to be clear this isnt an excited post this is a scared post .#i feel kinda guilty about it with how excited i was about the first 2 movies#but i just cant be anymore paramount and the scu have disappointed me so much within the past year in so many ways ......#shadow is one of my favorite characters his lore makes me go crazy and is one of the things that pulled me into loving sonic so much#but i literally felt nothing while watching that trailer aside from confusion at some of the writing choices being made#like i wasnt expecting an exact recreation of sa2 but why is sonic working with gun . wtf is gerald doing here . why are there no girls .#the only positives to me were things that were cool visually . which doesnt outweigh all the things that have annoyed/disappointed me#like who cares about another cool sonic and shadow fight scene we already have plenty of those .#Anyway. saw some of those new promotional images.#i swear to god if they actually start calling shadow+eggman+gerald team dark#like they suggested they might in that survey from a while back#im gonna become the joker for real#(insert the NO that is NOT solid snake image but it says team dark instead)#also maybe im taking the hedgehog games way too seriously here#but having gerald still be alive and present in some form feels like such a bad idea from a story perspective ... like .#for one shadow lost Everything in the gun raid having gerald still be here feels like its undermining that in a way#but also gerald's whole thing in sa2 is being long dead but still impacting the story despite that . why is he ALIVEEEE#and why is he here over rouge ???? do they just hate women or something#(before someone goes ''it would take too much time/money to animate another cgi character''#maybe the movies should have just been fully animated if that sort of thing was a concern . just saying)
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okay listen. I get the urge to talk about my favorite life series ship like it's Canon in every season...BUT. THAT HAS NEVER ONCE BEEN THE CASE.
Yes, Jimmy would be upset if Tango canaried (technical scientific term for that). Everyone would be- even I would be, and I've never watched a single one of his videos. Canarying sucks, and it hurts. Of course I would be upset. THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT I THINK JIMMY WOULD BREAK DOWN SOBBING FROM A CHARACTER STAND POINT. They have had only like... THREE on screen interactions. One is Tango murdering a man infront of Jimmy and another is Tango cheerfully burning down something one of Jimmy's teammates worked very hard on. WildLifeChara!Jimmy has more reason to hate or be afraid of WildLifeChara!Tango than to be madly in love with him.
I promise you, if Tango had offered Jimmy a life instead of Ren, people wouldn't shut up about for MONTHS. But, because it's Ren, somehow the interaction isn't NEARLY as homoerotic??? I understand having NOTP's, but the Jimmy/Ren ship doesn't even show up ONCE on ao3. Zero fics. ZE-RO. There's no reason to hate something that doesn't even exist.
This same concept applies for Flower Husbands as well- not just in Wild Life, and Secret Life and Limited Life and Last Life and Real Life though- in Empires.
I have no clue about Empires Season 1, but they barely interacted in Empires Season 2- and yet the amount of ship art I sift through on a weekly basis for my side blog is actually insane. Yeah, the few interactions WERE important, but I think Scott only flirted (in video) with Jimmy maaybbeeee three times. I have no idea what the count of that for streaming is, but I swear it is not enough to keep that number so inflated.
Although, honestly, this problem might just be affecting me because of my personal view on shipping- if it's in a context where it doesn't make sense for the characters to be romantically engaged, I won't read it or write it.
For example, my beloved Solidwood! I mostly get their vibes or read their fics from the following series: Evo, Last Life, New Life, Empires2, Secret Life. That's because those settings make sense! They are active, they are engaged, they have near constant interactions or very close base locations. It makes SENSE for them to be shipped. However, if you showed me art or fic of them in, say, Limited Life, I'd furrow my brow and tilt my head and say "no, that doesn't do anything for me." BECAUSE THEY HAVE ZERO REASON TO BE INVESTED ROMANTICALLY IN ONE ANOTHER THERE, AS A STAND ALONE SETTING.
Most of the major Jimmy ships, though, don't follow this rule. I can understand loving a ship so much you want to see it everywhere- but, I promise you, stepping back and looking at which characters actually have chemistry regarding the new setting and social system will do wonders... you won't have to think of new Au's to insert your favorite ship into a new setting... all ships will be your favorite ship (unless they give you the ick). Join the multishiper hivemind /j
No but honestly it's gotten to the point where I will like or dislike a creator/character of theirs by what ship is their most popular given the context of the setting. Like, Tango in Double Life? Awww the sweetie!! I love him :) and then Tango in Empires2 sets off alarm bells in my brain screaming at me. He is NOT meant to be here bringing that ship here, this is NOT its territory. Same problem for Scott in nearly damn near every SMP both Jimmy and him are in... except Wild Life because he's actually been pretty nice and not condescending or forcing on Jimmy. I guess also power imbalances in how fans view them is a major no-go for me...
Idk if you read this whole thing thanks I guess... for anymore needed context I am a Jimmy rarepair obsessed multishiper.
TLDR; Lots of popular ships are inserted into settings without a thought for what that would mean for the setting and any changes in the established social connections, which gives OP the ick. I'm also not policing ships I'm just begging people to please either understand more ships using in setting context or list their AU details in the summaries of the fics. This goes hand in hand with misinterpreting characters in writing also... the more ships you like the more characters you will get to get good at writing!!!!
#Realized why the reason some creators leave a bad taste in my mouth is because their main ship's fanbase#Shoves that ship into everything. Even places it shouldn't be. For example a crazy amount of the Jimmy empires fics#Are au's of Esmp1 where Tango rules a kingdom in the Nether. Yeah its a fun idea but if it dominates HALF of the tags its...#It's just kinda spam at that point. He's not even in that smp and I'll bet Tango is tagged more than one of the Canon emperors#And the nearly the other half of Jimmy Empires fics are god damn FLOWER HUSBANDS. YOU CANT ESCAPE THEM#And also Scott even shoves the ship on Jimmy. Did you not SEE THEIR INTERACTION IN REAL LIFE???#JUST REALIZES THATS WHY I WAS ABLE TO READ A FLOWER HUSBANDS FIC ONCE.BEVAUSE THE WRITER MADE THEM SEEM LIKE EQUALS#fandom discourse#fandom discussion#shipping discourse#shipping discussion#creacheurspeacher#ship and let ship#life series#life smp#trafficblr#solidaritygaming#jimmy solidarity#traffic smp#scott smajor#smajor1995#tangotek#wildlife smp#trafficshipping#long post#rant post#shipping rant#flower husbands#the ranchers#solidwood
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one time eva told me that inigo was basically just a total drama character and i cant like that kinda hit me like a slap in the face but like in a good way because like. she was right. and that was several months ago but the concept was so good i sometimes just come back to it and now i have a question for the class
no i dont think inigo (or anyone else i excluded) would win but if you have a case for him im open
#fe13#polls#i think severa could do it but she’d have to pull a heather#where she starts off bad and goes through forced character development#i think yarne could pull off a flying under the radar kind of win#where him being a scaredy cat is just kinda like. ‘well hes definitely not gonna make it’ and then he does#but then like i feel like they could be fucked up and try to feed him rabbit or something and he would have to leave so 50/50#i dont think inigo would win i really dont#but i think he could go far#unfortunately i think he’d actually be good at the game but then. well. target#i think the same thing goes for kjelle which is why shes not here#but i guess theres always the possibility she just wins every challenge so it doesnt matter#i also just didnt want to write all 13 options it splits the vote too much#i think owain would be funny but i think hes also either 100% winning or the first one voted out#bc god… SHUT UP#how many of u guys have actually watched td#i feel like it was so popular but when i ask ppl around me theyre like What are u talking about#LIKE WHAT DID YALL WATCH AS KIDS HELLO….
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Erin, to her crush: You're a dick
Mason, the crush: I won't argue! But to clarify -
#my characters#its so sad that all of erins character development and kindness is on paper and nothing digital to show her growth#she picks on mason for many reasons and she kinda narrows her eyes at him but its more to squint than to glare#because she watches him from a distance when hes off laughing with others#though they are united on peter being worse than mason at least they can agree no matter what peter is worse#but also masons right arm is metal and she thinks its fascinating bc theres so many high tech prosthetics#why is he using the equivalent of a trash can ? is it some weird flex to not needing advanced stuff?#and its just he was from a poor family and was born with one full arm and then a stump#and he lived a lot of his youth with just one arm so once he got a second arm (installed basically) he went cheap#since he only wanted the other arm to get better jobs cause not many people would hire him with one arm#and he never really cared much about her comments because her lil verbal pokes of#so rogers whod you piss off? the mafia? is actually nicer than stuff he heard as a kid without the fake arm#so he tells her the only reason he has a metal limb is because god knew hed be two strong if born with two arms#and shes like uh huh sure thing rogers#and yeeeeah eventually something happens where mason is injured and erin is panicking#and hes acting like its okay to die because hes a dick remember TRYING to make light of it and she gets so sad#and after hes recovering and better he feels guilty making her so sad and hes talking to her#and she says that she doesnt have a lot of friends and she didnt want to lose one of the few people she liked#and hes just oh.......................... ididntthinkthatwouldbeme#so he starts to be super friendly to her and enforcing the crush that she doesnt wanna own up to#and then she does eventually confess and mason is baffled as to since when and shes like day one? and he just#erin you have got to be kidding me you were glaring at me for months#and shes just i have bad eye sight and im shy what did you expect#he isnt super smart or super stupid hes just exceedingly average
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Thinking about Orchid and her connection to my take on Gender (because this was meant to be about her and the Crew but it just devolved into a character analysis kinda??? More trauma-dumping maybe???) This is very much an oc/personal rant so feel free to ignore it 🫡
So, Orchid started off as a character I didn't really think much of (hear me out this is going to be relevant) because I wanted to add a 'girl' character but didn't know what to *do* with her, y'know? She was always going to be the strongest one there, she had the odds stacked in her favor with her parents. She was always going to be the gloomy side-character to match Reset's energy. But I think she's gone through every stage of Generic Woman I could possibly find.
At first she was angry and abrasive (think Fell!Sans) where every other word was a curse and she was likely to throw the first punch then laugh as she kicks her enemy while they're down. This was when Reset was a cartoonishly self-centered villain whose goal was simply to prove others wrong. Then Orchid became a sort of sisterly figure. This was short-lived, but she was the one comforting people who Reset would torment, but would ultimately follow his orders, because at this point he was actually a danger and sadistic. And then there was the phase where the story mellowed out and she became the token Goth Girl who, yes she was strong, but was heavy on the 'whatever' energy. Then there was her Era of deep self-loathing and anxiety about her worth that held her back and made her a much more timid and meek character who would only lash out on occasion.
Now, Orchid is the best of those iterations I've written yet. She's calm, level-headed, and a natural leader. Her father raised those traits into her. But she's very reactive, and can be silly, and when she's comfortable it's likely that air of importance transforms into something more comfortable and familiar. She laughs loudly and grins wide, she likes loud video-games but loves to read in the quiet. She's extremely disciplined, and normally no one can get through her tough exterior besides her best friend, Reset. She does what she does for her own enjoyment, sure, but she's thought of every angle and makes her choice to help Reset and control the others with her whole chest. She still worries she won't live up to her invisible expectations, and that and her loyalty are her two driving forces.
I know that Orchid is important to me because she's the longest-running female oc I've had. I have a rough relationship with womanhood/girlhood and I know looking back that Orchid recieved every ounce of my distaste for being a woman that I could shovel into her. That never made her less of a character, she was actually always one of my favorites, and rarely was she a 'punching bag oc'. I just... projected onto her a lot. And she's a good sign of how I've learned who I am. I've decided that my own femininity is something I could live without. I'd rather not associate myself with it, and I'd like to leave it in my past, focusing on a future where I'm not tied down with any gender roles or expectations. That won't happen, but I've come to terms with it myself. Orchid though? I figured out through her that I don't have to hate women characters. My own distaste for my circumstances doesn't mean I have to push it onto my characters (on God I've never expressed anything rude to actual people, that'd be rude as hell and uncalled for, but I have a bad habit of disliking fictional women in media). So, Orchid is a well-roubded character finally. She has motivations abd goals and a *lot* more depth than I ever expected her to. She's happy with being a woman, she's content. She's not treated differently for it in unfair ways by those she cares about, so she doesn't mind it. She likes to wear pretty outfits and lets Reset add bows to her ribbons. She doesn't let being a woman hold her back in the slightest.
So, yeah. Orchid is one of my babies. If I ever leave this Fandom behind for good, she's one that's coming with (Ichor, Orchid, and Pretender all have human designs I can use elsewhere lol-) but in the meantime I'll just rotate her around in my brain for a while longer.
If I'm right, she's been with me for nearly 5-6 years and I went through a *lot* with her as an outlet. So, she's kinda just like an old stuffed animal. A lil ripped, matted fur, maybe a stain or two, but there's a story there and that makes it important beyond belief.
#spotatalk#i'm just gonna drop this in the queue I guess?#but I'm writing this on the last day of june so....#whenever this rolls around will be a jumpscare abd a half I guess?#I think honestly I coukd do a full breakdown of the Crew and why they're all expressions of me but like#quick summary is#Reset: Wants approval from people but mostly clings to the past. is afraid of losing his brother and acts on it to bring him back. i#<- I lack that conviction to do whatever you have to to get your way. i worry my brother and I have a weird gap between us we wont repair#Orchid: Uhhh woman. lots of pressure that she had at one time that's now no being pressed but she still tries to live up to it also.#<- I don't like the pressure of being a woman. also gifted-kid who cannot move past the pressures imposed to be 'perfect' and it's screwed#Stereo: Pulled into a situation he doesn't want to be in initially. it's bad for him but he likes the people so he decides to stay#<- I see the good in people. even when they hurt others around me. I was a bystander often and should've left the situations. paralelling.#Monochrome: Afraid. No purpose or preperation in life. soneone offers to guide him and he takes that offer because it's better than home.#<- Kinda self-explanitory but I've got little direction and feel lost a lot of the time. If I'm given a path I usually walk it no hesitation#and... for fun let's do some others!#Haphazard: Cleaning up after others since childhood. he's never really gotten a break and sees any sort of mess as an enemy#-> He's fixing rifts in universes I gotta patch relationships. there's so much conflict and I'm always so overwhelmed by it#Lost: He's got amnesia. no clue where he is. where he's from. who you are. who he is. he'll know when he gets there. he's sure.#-> I've been hsving minor issues with my memory for years. i coukd be forgetful but sometimes it just escapes me and that's spooky#Teddy: Isolated in her universe for years. she self-mutilated until she liked herself. when she finally met people she compulsively lied#-> Much more extreme version of how isolated I sonetines feel. hobbies can't replace human interaction but it's hard#oh and Ichor: God who loves mortals but cannot seem to find ones who will prove hin right for his trust and care#<- I've got a big heart. i express it often but the sentinent is scoffed off a lot. I get beat down about it and just keep moving forward#Pretender: Knows who he is. however the world doesn't like it much so he acts how they expect him to or isolates away#<- I still present femme when I'm nb/agender. i bend and break to people's perception of me. if I can't solve something I run.#okay I feel more insane than when ai started but these stupid skeletons have helped me through so many mental health problems it's only a#little bit funny 🙏
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i miss posting and making and engaging with ieytd content but I will be honest sometimes it feels alienating. as a lesbian.
#bee's buzzing#ieytd#i dont know.. its probably just me being Strange. but.#the Main guy in the fandom is juniper. and he's interesting! but. i don't... think about him as often#and when i do it's never in the shipping / x reader context i see so frequently in the tags.#i dont ship him with agent phoenix because. my agent is an it/its dyke. so i dont really engage in that side of fandom#i also dont think about the handler as often because. idk i just think about the women more!#but juniper and agent phoenix and the handler are like. the only people i see talked about often#which is fine!! people like them. i also like them just. not in the same way/to the same extent.#im here for the women. but. they're not talked about often at all :[#when they are it's usually briefly in passing.#they get the worst of the mischaracterization too imo. because people just do not give them the same depth as they like to give-#- charas like john. it makes me kinda sad tbh.#and also the fandom does not. seem to make much space for f/f content.#i know like. the handful of other people who make f/f content for ieytd.#and. god. idk im still honestly a bit ticked off by one solaris post that 1) was not a good analysis i will be quite honest.#it was very surface level. like really basic info and also iirc not entirely accurate? i cannot remember anymore#but. 2). it started by saying 'nobody talks about solaris outside of fabbylaris' and that still makes my blood boil.#like. not to vaguepost but. the fabbylaris posters ARE talking about solaris outside of a shipping context. please. please#also there was a whole Thing a while back where people started being strange about non-feminine nonbinary agent phoenix.#and as a nonbinary butch-adjacent dyke. it made my skin crawl!!! im NOT feminine and idk why making agent phoenix not feminine is.#apparently Bad to a certain subset of the fandom#sorry but im a dyke and i WILL make the player insert protag a butch lesbian who doesnt use she/her.#and if you have a problem with that please think about Why people making the player insert nonbinary and androgynous/Vaguely Masc is-#- such a problem to you. and whether that is alienating to the trans people in the fandom.#okay. im normal now. goodnight.
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7am, eating cold leftover teriyaki stir-fry for breakfast and crying over blorbos
#normal Saturday morning behavior#redacted spoilers#redacted audio#redacted sam#Seven.txt#rp audio stuff#well. crying over one singular blorbo in particular. Sam's still got me in an emotional chokehold#and i'm too sad to even make a stupid little joke abt how i wouldn't mind if it was a physical one too. ayeee *insert sad eyebrow wiggle*#no but seriously. i have so many feelings abt him and i can't even say it all bc some of it isn't public info yet#eh fuck it i'll just draft this until the audio goes public and then i'll post it once it's no longer Exclusive Info#bc i dont wanna leak Early Access stuff but i have to get this out of my system rn and the new audio is part of what sparked these thoughts#which is funny bc i. literally haven't even listened to it yet. i'm not Ready 😭#where's that tiktok screenshot that's like. 'hyperfixation so bad that i can't even engage with the source material' bc that's me rn#like bro Sam only won the poll like. 2 or 3 days ago and Eric is Already dropping a new Sam audio?? hello? Mr. Redacted i wasn't prepared#anyways i was spoiling myself by perusing the comments last night trying to get a feel for if it's gonna be more angst or comfort#and i saw a comment that absolutely shattered me. and it reignited all my sad thoughts about Sam's eventual. uh. y'know. death.#apparently they plant a tree together or smthn in the new audio (which already has me & my beloved 10y/o orange tree feeling some kinda way#but to the individual in the comments who brought to all our minds the image of Sam sitting beneath that tree in 30 or so years time#when he's decided that he's ready to die and sits out there waiting for the sun to rise..................... 🥲#i'm gonna need u to compensate me for all of that unexpected emotional damage /j /nm#i'm Still not over what he told Darlin' while they had their talk about the future up on his roof together. that audio killed me#then yesterday i was listening to my Sam & Darlin' playlist while cleaning. and Malibu Nights by LANY came on. which i always skip bc Sad#but i let it play and just started crying. standing in the middle of the room all disheveled and holding a broom. as one does.#iirc that song is one that Eric himself said is applicable to Sam which is why/how i found it and put it on the playlist. and god. g o d#hm. i hope that wasn't Patreon exclusive info. i can't remember if it was a public post where he said that or not. hope it's okay to share#but if we can take that song as like. unofficial canon for Sam then that also confirms my idea that he used to drink to cope#which makes the opening lines of Fix What You Didn't Break by Nate Smith even more applicable. i should go edit that post actually#anyways i'm just. feeling a lot. and i love Sam very much and i don't want him to die. but i want him to do what he wants at the same time#Alexis took so fucking much from him. he deserves to live - and end - his life on his own terms. ... i think i need to go write something#*casually fishes this post out of the drafts 3 and a half days later* hi so uh. i wrote a 4k oneshot :) and will hopefully post it tomorrow
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Still thinking about this bc being a shitty teacher isn't the same as being evil and yet- *gets shot*
#Porter discourse bc good god if theres ever a character that I could write at length about their character assassination its him#Porter becoming comically evil for a bit I can handle but then the grooming being tacked on is like horrific in a way thats like.. okay#but why did that have to happen??#and I don't think brennan meant anything malicious by it y'know? it was more like 'hey! Emily would LOVE this & she'll still play fig!'#And yes the seeds were planted in sophomore year with the nightmare kings crown and Ragh#But we also saw how he was when working with other students and how much he cared for Ragh zelda and Fig like he was proud of his students#HE BECAME PROUD OF GORGUG#So to find out he was basically just grooming Kip is like- and then the seriousness of the grooming isnt addressed#its not handled with the level of seriousness like when the table realizes Bobby Dawn groomed Sandra Lynn#It's played as a bit and it feels like are we eating our cake and then having it too by making him a bumbling idiot in the finale when#he was shown as clever enough to fly under the radar except to fig who in the meta emily kept playing up the porter is evil bit bc no one#else believed it and it was funny to play up fig being extra sus of him#but then its also like okay we dont care about the grooming now also because it was kipperlily who they were beefing with- its just?#I wish the grooming never because part of it and I feel like thats the thing that bothers me about junior year and Porter specifically#AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#Porter cliffbreaker#not main d20 tagging this bc i know I'll look fucking insane but I do think porter as the big bad couldve been cleaner and it made me lose#a little faith in the storytelling of FH and made me not want a senior year#it kinda turned me off from d20 like i just have been less interested and the last 3 episodes are a massive reason why#and now theres too much shit left hanging so its like.. we kinda need a senior year but its like.. ehh.
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its been talked about a lot that ian flynn haters who constantly complain about everything he works on and talk about him as if hes this evil man whos out to destroy the sonic franchise are annoying and yeah i agree but honestly i think people who worship the ground he walks on and act like hes the King Of Sonic whos single handedly responsible for anything good that comes out of the franchise and could never make a weird writing choice ever and whos every word and opinion is canon information regardless of context or source are annoying too just in a different way . basically i think people need to be more normal about him all around hes literally just some guy
#like no writer is incapable of making a weird writing choice or writing a bad story#i can think of some stuff he wrote that i didnt like or thought was kinda weird#that doesnt mean that i dont respect him as a writer though . hes also written a lot of things that i love#basically what i already said . people always aggressively hate him or act like hes the god of sonic with no in between#why cant we just be normal about him
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am i tripping or is x3 relatively way better than dark phoenix like,,, obviously the second half of x3's plot is atrociously wrong (apart from when erik keeps bringing up charles) but the initial set up and premise feel less flat than dark phoenix with more things going on than just jean/phoenix and erik and the brotherhood don't feel as shoehorned?
i fear i feel you ..... however ive always held the belief X3 wasnt a terrible movie on the sole basis hank was there and the movie started with old man bickering while adopting their daughter so this aint a shocking opinion to meee
'but snap hank was in dark phoenix too' ok he didnt piss me off in X3 !!!!! moving on !!!!!!!!
#snap chats#so funny how things are intersecting cause people are talking about DP on twitter#like with X3. it wasnt my favorite but i could at least be like 'ok that was fine'#DP just had me bored or like. Miffed#idk i should rewatch them movies again.... awful because i rewatched dark phoenix twice in a week for some reason#I DONT KNOW WHY?? I WATCHED IT ONCE THEN AGAIN FOR SOME RESAON BUT OK#anyway no youre right with the brotherhood bit like we were actualy introduced to them in x3#or we saw how we got here. in dp We Just Fuckin Here. Inexplicably. Erik Werent You Wanted For Terrorism#why you just hangin out in this relatively nice field with supplies LMAO#oh but about hank tho. this my beef with the hank/mystique bit like girl why he so pressed at charles like that#as if mystique wasnt charles' sister like hank you gottttt nooooo right to be more upset than charles#like people crticize DP for how antagonistic people are to charles and WHILE CONCEPTUALLY i dont think thats a bad thing#i think it can be fun and interesting to criticize charles sometimes- or at least question him every now and then#but it do be kinda comedic in this movie cause its so....... Oh Hello JLAEKAJK LIKE WHY YALL SO MEAAN TO HIM WHATD HE DO#god this rambling is not meant for tags im gonna run out. all ima say is X3 did handle the dark phoenix thing better#even if the movie still isnt. super good. on consensus idk i should rewatch it it been a while
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alas, turns out grad school is hard so i haven't been drawing much of anything BUT. now. some side characters for yall
#original#ocs#art#satyrs#artists on tumblr#character design#Heiti Varrater#Tcham Bakome#Angus Singh#HAII. i've needed to design these 3 in particular for EVER. finally i have done eet#i actually. really REALLY like how bakome turned out. he looks FANTASTIC#bang on with this guy. he looks great#also rlly like how singh turned out. that dude is singh for sure#heiti.... she's giving me problems. as she does best#this is her 2nd design now and it's better than my first but theres something still missing. idk what#ill probably continue to refine her with time#grouping her with these 2 is kinda odd cause like. she has nothing to do with them other than being in the same general storyline#like she never really meets them?? maybe once for a brief period. idk i havent thought about it much#they're on different ships. theyre doin different things#but theyre all side characters that are relatively important SO. put them together#ive resigned to just. drawing humans with pointy ears. bcause why the fuck wouldnt i#every other species gets fun ears. give humans some point to em why not#there is a. range. of feelings about these guys#LOVE heiti. she sucks (affectionate). she's fantastic. obsessed with her#bakome has lots going on and im not even sure of most of it. but he is VERY interesting and he occupies a cool middle space of like.#doing no harm but preventing no harm either. doing no harm but allowing harm to be done. he has morality but he turns the other way#idk. i like him and i think he borders on sucks but either way he's interesting#and then there singh. god he sucks. he sucks so bad. worst of em all. captain worst#the harm that is being done is allowed by him because hes the captain and that's if hes not just doing it himself. fuck that guy#i do think hes fun tho. hes. a little flatter than bakome rn but hes still got SOME interesting stuff going on. just a lil
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