#DUDE I DABBLED IN IT A BIT HERE BUT OH MY FUCK.... IT NEEDS AN ENTIRE POST OH FUCK

[just-null]

How do we feel about Beach wear Noritoshi....

Everyone thinks he'd go covered head to toe wearing those wet suits divers use, but no. Noritoshi isn't the type to want to attract attention to himself when it's not needed, so he'd try to blend in. Emphasis on try.

He's the guy wearing a covering or some shit. I think you'd have to fight him to wear a translucent one. (if you splash him with water, you'll acheive the same effect thoughahahaha) even though it's a beach, he's trying to find an appropriate way to cover up, hes just like that. yes to sunscreen ofc. I can see him in a sun hat, but it's not his.. maybe he took it from one of the girls

HIS HAIR WOULD BE UP BC ITD BE TOO HOT AND THE SUN HAT WOULD HELP HIM FROM GETTING OVERHEATED H.H....H IS FACE WOULD BE FLUSHED BC OF THE HEAT AND. AND. AND.. he's like the beach babe on the shore, soaking up the sun and reading a book or smth. if you splash him with water, i can see him trying to get you back. then boom bam, hes in the water with everyone else.

OH FUCK that's even IF he goes to the beach. it's like seeing God in the flesh, idk man I'd go blind........... hed probably come along when he realizes theres hot people at the beach. he cant have you looking at people in that state, hold on hes going. give him five minutes..!

EXTRA

[untied covering version under the cut. like his booefjehsaf are out aha.]

ahahahahahahahahaa *froths at the mouth*

mf dont even begin to look at me like that

[irondadfics]

Hello! I was wondering if anyone knows any fics of Peter being a bit of a dick? I love the stories where he is rude to people, normally as a way to push them away so they can’t see how bad his life is. Any examples of rude/sassy Peter would be greatly appreciated!

here are some for you! Happy reading

Wake up and smell the coffee by Bergen

The Avengers find themselves in need of Spider-Man’s help to improve their reputation. Peter Parker, however, doesn't exactly have the best reputation: he has been dabbling in a life of crime. Tony really doesn't care about picking up after some degenerate teen. Peter really doesn't care about some dumb adults telling him what to do. And nothing will ever, ever change their minds.

100 Hours (Community Service is for the Turtles) by orphan_account

“Hey there, Parker. I’ve got some exciting news about your community service sentencing,” the bright voice from the other line says. "It looks like you've been reassigned." “Oh, yeah?” Peter asks, warily. His social worker sounds excited, but he's been burned a few too many times to take any "good news" at face value. Peter listens to her explain with a furrowed brow, and when the call is over, he opens the web browser on his cracked Android and quickly types the words september foundation into the search bar. His eyes narrow as he peruses the top result. Oh, he is going to kill that Stark bastard. - All Peter Parker wants to do is fly under the radar. He wants to go to school, work off his sentence by picking up trash at the stupid park, and avoid going home for as long as possible each night. Unfortunately for him, Tony Stark has never been one to see untapped potential and not do something about it.

The seventh escape by Bergen

Tony and Pepper snatched Peter up only a few weeks after the first Spider-Man video went viral. Real fucking coincidence, right? Suddenly, Tony Stark rocked right up at his group home, strewing business cards around like he was Oprah. If Oprah were an ugly white dude with a goatee. “Big fan,” he told Peter, fasting forward through a video of Spider-Man catching a bus before it crashed through a road block. “In and out of foster care your whole life, am I right? I believe my wife and I could provide a very fitting home for you.” “Pass,” Peter said.

Paradigm shift by Bergen

Peter got a Stark phone when he was ten. Adrian took him to a big store with lots of TV screens that all played the same video of Tony Stark declaring to the world that he was Iron Man. They ducked behind the microwaves, both of them giggling as Adrian stuffed the phone under Peter’s sweater. They walked right out the door without tripping the alarm, and Adrian bought him ice cream to celebrate. — After his parents die, Peter is taken in by the Toomes family. Things slowly, then quickly spiral out of control. All Adrian wants is to take revenge on Tony Stark. All Peter wants is to do the right thing. Why is that so much harder than expected?

the long game by niniblack

“Your prints were a match for a missing persons case from ten years ago. A little boy who was kidnapped.” The officer pulls out a picture that she turns toward Peter. It’s a little boy around four years old, with curly brown hair. “That’s you,” she says. Peter shakes his head. “Do you remember how you got to that park? Who left you there?” “Lady, I don’t remember jack shit,” Peter says. “I was like four. No one remembers shit from when they were four.” --- Or: the biodad au where Peter gets arrested for selling drugs, and that actually improves his life.

[usernameforaboredcat]

Head Over Heels (Law X TomBoyF!Reader)

(A little dabble I thought while taking a piss 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 like 3 minutes ago)

Warnings⚠: None

[Part 1/?]

Law meets Luffys older (by like a year) sister who honestly the type of girl he’d imagine being the big sister to the Straw Hat and BOY is she just fiiiiiiiine!

3 brothers!

Imagine growing up with 3 idiot brothers with only one of them being less stupid. Fist fights, rolling around in mud and dirt, covered in blood from hunting, needing a bath every night to not get sick. Haha God I love those idiots!

~

Law doesn’t know why he’s here, walking down a random street on a random island with the idiot Straw Hat Luffy. As the two walk, Luffy lets out a loud yell as he sees a familiar older girl walking down the street. “HEEEEEEY! (YYYYY/NNN)!”. He calls way too loudly, drawing the attention of everyone including the girl. She turns in confusion, the gasps as she looks over with wide eyes and a bright smile.

Luffy jolts off over to the girl, the Captain of the Heart Pirates groaning as he slowly walks to catch up. He sees her wearing baggy long pants and a bikini, saddles and a small pack bag through the belt parts of her pants. Luffy jumps and hugs her, who hugs him back. “No way! It’s so good to see you again little dude!”. She greets him. “I’ve missed you so much!”. Luffy cries. (Y/n) pulls off the younger kid, putting him in a headlock as she ruffles his hair with his knuckles.

“You little fuck! I thought your ass was dead you little shit! Scared me half to death! I swore I saw the light!”. She snaps at him angrily, tightening her hold as he starts to choke. “I-I’m sorry! Please don’t kill me!”. Luffy breathes out, spazzing in her hold.

The Heart Pirate Captain finally catches up, looking at the two with a raised eyebrow. “The hell are you?”. (Y/n) asks the taller man, looking up at him. A thump goes through his whole body, strange. “Th-this is my friend!”. Luffy chokes out, now trying to pull her arm away. “No shit! Can’t believing you made a friend that isn’t some 30 year old guy!”. She says happily.

Law looks at his now turning blue friend, his cheeks reddening at the sign of his face so squished against her boob. “Hope this little turd hasn’t been too much of a pain in the ass”. She tells him, finally letting go of Luffy to let him fall to the ground. ‘Yes, he has been a giant pain in my fucking ass’. “No, not at all”. He responds. ‘Damn it!’.

She then hums, getting on her tippy toes and leans right up into his face. “Holy crap! You’re that Law guy! I heard about you! Your bounty is like crazy high at like 3,000,000,000 berries!”. She points out in shock. “Yeah! Isn’t he awesome!”. Luffy cheers, now back on his feet. “It is quite impressive, I must say”. She hums, holding her chin with her hand as she nods.

“Uh…th-thanks”. He mutters, gripping the brim of his hat to lower it to hide his slowly growing blush. ‘What’s with this woman? Why am I like this? Damn it!’. “So, whatchu up to these days?”. Luffy asks his older sister, the two turning to each other. “Oh ya know, just traveling around looking for anything to do! Probably doing the least to piss off the old man out of us kids”. She answers, leaning with her hand on her hip.

“How bout you? I’ve seen that your bounty has only been goin up so ya still trying to be King of the Pirates?”. She asks. “Yep! And it’s only gonna go up and I’m gonna be king!”. He responds happily. She chuckles at her little brother. “I believe it! Remember I’ve been your number one supporter since day one”. She reminds him, nudging his arms with her elbow.

She then turns back to the other captain, feeling an arrow go through his heart when her eyes meet his. “Mind if I hang with you guys for a while? Just for a bit, I wanna catch up with my baby brother”. She asks him oh so kindly. Law felt as if his heart stopped, chocking and spitting out his own spit. Luffy laughs at his reaction while his sister just stares.

She reaches into her bag and pulls out a handkerchief, holding it out to him. “Do you…need this?”. She asks nervously, never really seeing a guy act like this before in her life. “Uh…”. He takes the handkerchief from her, feeling the soft fabric on his fingers. “Thanks”. He thanks, raising it to clean his face. “Oh man! You should have seen your face!”. Luffy laughs at his older friend.

He holds the handkerchief back to her, her hand grazing his as she takes it back. Her finger tips are as soft as silk, her fingers smoothly sliding off his. Laws nose suddenly bursts, blood gushing out his nose like a hose. “Holy crap!”. The girl yelps, jumping back while Luffy bursts out laughing again. “Hahaha! Now you’re like Sanji!”. He laughs, holding his stomach from all his laughing.

(Y/n) looks at her brother with a concerned expression. “Is he uh…usually like this?”. She asks him. “Hehehe, nope!”. He simply answers. All Law can do it turn away from the two, his face a dark beet red. Never in his life has he been this embarrassed just because of some girl. (Y/n) leans over so she can whisper in Luffys ear. “Should I leave and we catch up a different time?”. She whisper asks him, causing the younger boy to turn and look at her.

“No no it’s fiiiine! Just give him a minute”. He reassures her. She hums as she leans away from her baby brother, then just to lean back over. “He said he acts like a friend of yours, what’s he like?”. She asks him. “Oh you mean Sanji? He usually acts like that around girls, he really likes girls”. Luffy answer. Oh…OH!!! Oh~. “Oh I see~”. She coos, leaning away from her little brother again.

“Huh? Get what?”. Luffy questions. (Y/n) then grabs Laws hand, gaining his attention and causing him to freeze in place. “So Law, are you here for long? Perhaps we can meet up and you can tell me some stories of dumb shit my baby brother has done?”. She asks him, sending him a little wink. His nose starts to bleed again, but he’s able to muster out a nod. “Cool! Now why don’t we go somewhere nice and chat!?”. She says happily, linking arms with her brother and dragging the two down the street.

Trafalgar Law, Died Age 26

Death By Blood Loss & Heart Attack Caused By Luffys Hot Older Sister

[musicreveiwsbyezti]

Yo yo yo! It's June topster day!

This month I listened to a lot of "must listens" also Steve Albini finally died so I could check out Big Black's albums.

Unsure: Gorguts-Obscura (Avant-Guard/Death Metal): What the actual fuck is this album? The entirety of this feels like every member of the band is playing different songs. There are few songs that "I get" but I think this definitely needs some more time for me. Though I still recommend it as it is an interesting experience.

14th: Blasphemy-Fallen Angel of Doom (War Metal): No. I consider myself someone who enjoys quite a lot of black metal, but this shit is genuinely goofy.

13th: Dropdead-Selftitle 1993 (Powerviolence): It's alright, doesn't really stick out as much as other pv records I listened through.

12th: Napalm Death-Scum (Grindcore): The father of grindcore sure feels like as the father of grindcore. I didn't really think that grind evolved a lot, but after listening to this I realised that the genre itself got a little more... focused or something? Half of the songs here feel like they're made to make non punks be pissed about "Hurr durr how can people listen to 4 seconds of noise and call it music?". I'm sure it will grow on me but I feel like this record haven't aged the best.

11th: Motörhead-Ace of Spades (Hard Rock/Speed Metal): The title track is so good that they recorded it 11 more times. I probably have a bitter taste in my mouth cuz every good damned place circlejerks over this album with shit like "ooooh this is the only band that both punks and metalhead and rockers alike enjoy" and then it's just the most basic ass hard rock album on the planet. Also I know that jailbait is supposed to be a satire/parody of the pedo musicians of that era, but Lemmy was such a genius that he forgot to make it sound like a satire/parody. Just listen to the title track and maybe listen to the We Are The Road Crew and you can skip the rest.

10th: Nails-Abandon All Life (Grindcore/Powerviolence): Short and sweet like all pv records should be. Some people consider this to be Nails' best but I can't see that.

9th: Big Black-Songs About Fucking (Noise Rock): The hardest album name ever. Alone it's a great album, but knowing that it's the follow up to Atomizer makes it a bit less impressive. The first half (Happy Otter) is the part which got a proper studio recording session, it is more polished and "thought over". Arguably every song in this part fucks hard. The second half (Sad Otter) was just put together at home and feels like a rough demo. It has good songs, but they could have been way better. I highly recommend this album, but only after listening to Atomizer.

8th: Nails-You Will Never Be One Of Us (Grindcore): Oh my fucking God this album fucks so hard. The intro song with the other punk metal crossover vocalist dropping the album name goes so hard it makes me hate the police even more. I'd argue that this is Nails' best...right after Unsilent Death... but still their best.

7th: Neurosis-Souls at Zero (Atmospheric Sludge Metal): This is their 3rd highest rated album and their 1st and 2nd are unavailable in my country due to bs copyright issues. Still it's pretty good. I've only dabbled into the whole atmosludge genre, but I have to be honest I see why people rate this over regular sludge.

6th: Kate Bush-Hounds of Love (Art/Prog Pop): Even though I more of a Björk, Billie Eilish and Sade kinda guy... this is so good. Hounds of Love literally redefined for me what pop music means for me, and I wasn't even a (major) elitist to begin with! The second half with the more artsy stuff is in short beautiful. I have no words to describe how this album makes me feel.

5th: Megadeth-Rust in Peace (Thrash Metal): Dave Mustain sucks as a vocalist... but he can sure solo! Hangar 18 feels like the dude on the cover is personally guiding the listener through the cover showing off all the weird stuff, which makes the rest of the album oddly atmospheric in a conceptual way? I guess. All in all, all that matters that this album is filled to the brim with insane guitar work. This one is especially good for newer guitarists who are interested in metal.

4th: Big Black-Atomizer (Noise Rock): 10/10, I give no more words, this is a must experience to everyone who loves noisy shit.

3rd: Carcass-Hearthwork (Melodic Death Metal): I don't know how Carcass went from inventing goregrind to making this. I can barely comprehend all the massive guitar work put into this. This is probably one of the safest places to start listening to death metal (in a good way).

2nd: Bolt Thrower-...For Victory (Death Metal): Bolt Thrower can't miss. That's just a fact at this point. They stuffed so much groove into this album filled with "war sucks" energy that it can't be put into words by my illiterate ass. Just binge BT's discography already.

1st: Throbbing Gristle-20 Jazz Funk Greats (Industrial): This is the most overlooked album on every music site.

[kafkaoftherubble]

最近还没有新的project，所以跟放假无异。真惬意！

Although we didn't manage to do our Morning Routine, and I ended up moving the planned Resume Dollmaking plan to some other day (Wednesday? Thursday?), the rest of today was pretty great!

Seeing Dune (in fact—only one-third of it so far) on Netflix and streaming it on Discord turned out to be a success!

Seeing the movie with an unexpected TimothEÊĒÉ Chalamet Doubter—who seems to shiver every time the dude reappears on-screen—is hilarious. "I've been seeing this movie for a while now and I haven't seen him change his expression—oh wait, finally." It's the fact that this is from someone who dabbles in acting themself that makes it such a burn!

Honestly, we should pit Lyi the TimothÈËÊÉ Apologist with them together. This world has too much love and peace, there is not enough c h a o s!

Will resume the rest of Dune later tonight. And that will be after I game with Ritsu, who insisted that today we should play our old Resident Evil 6 instead. Her reasoning? "The way we suck has gone stale. We should be bolder and fail in new avenues! Be a generalist even in the art of being fucking failures!"

Please. Past Lyn had played RE6 with this lil' ass before. Remember the "大姐 I give you my controller! Control my character and control Chris just for this segment! ... WOW YOU SO AMAZING, YOU CONTROL CHRIS WITH YOUR FOOT!" session and the "大姐 WOOHOO BLAST THAT HELICOPTER WITH BAZOOKA! I'll be hiding in this room behind you and give you moral support! If you're near death I will come out and inject you with medicine! I NOW ISSA DOCTOR! ...WHAT? THESE GUNS ARE FOR COSPLAY!"

Oh god. We are not even gonna get past the first part of Level 1, are we?

---------------

The best thing about today is that I finally get to study.

That reminds me! I have never documented Miki the pencil case in this garden before. I think she was created by 2018 Lyndises. Ah, maybe next time.

----

Whenever I have time, however short that period might be, the book I always have the most interest in is Buddhist Ethics. Which... is really different from the choice of, say, Lyndises of a Few Years Ago. Fionn has such a hold on me, damn it.

Not that I'm complaining; I just like seeing him happy. I like seeing him think. I like hearing him explain shits. I just like hanging out with him.

The last time, the last Lyn stopped at the chapter discussing Buddhaghosa's Visuddhimagga ("The Path of Purification"). I did a bit of revision on it because I kinda forgot what's it about, and I can't continue if I forgot.

Visuddhimagga is a Theravadin ethical treatise. That means the self-liberation of the student (ya know, the one who's taking up the path) is the central goal. I have seen some Mahayana scholars and philosophers disparage Theravada school for being self-centered because their focus is self-liberation instead of "the liberation of all sentient beings." But man! Sectarian disputes, mate. Quite an unfair accusation, too, methinks.

Look at the central value Buddhaghosa emphasizes:

Generosity.

And he didn't mean generosity in finances or material goods. It's not about "a set of actions." Buddhaghosa's concept of generosity is an orientation. A preference in seeing the world; it's a whole-ass path. More specifically, it means being generous with one's time, patience, knowledge, effort, care, possessions—everything you own is liable to be given to anyone else who needs it more. That kind of generosity.

I really can't see how that makes the Theravada school selfish. Is the accusation aimed more at the intent of a Theravadin Buddhist instead of their ethical stance? "You're only doing all of these good things for your eventual liberation instead of to liberate everyone together!" That sorta thing?

Hmm. On paper, that intent does seem self-centered. But if putting Theravadin ethics into practice benefits people around that student in effect—is the accusation of selfishness really as meaningful as it sounds?

Look over here:

The ultimate goal of practicing generosity is the attainment of nonegocentricity, a.k.a the ethical side of anattā, "non-self."

Oh, but there is an additional side to practicing generosity, too. A phenomenological one.

Basically, one adopts the preference of generosity because the world is so interdependent (pratītyasamutpāda, "dependent co-arising") that any distinction between one's self and others is illusionary and arbitrary. That is a phenomenological realization—it's knowledge regarding how the world is perceived. When you give to someone, you didn't lose shit. That someone gained what you gave, and that translates to a mutual gain for both of you.

"When the mouth eats from the hand, the entire body benefits—the hand did not lose anything at all. It never had. But if the hand doesn't realize this, then it convinces itself it's now at a disadvantage and suffers from an invisible, nonexisting loss."

Hee hee! It's so nice to have someone like Fionn to provide commentaries.

---

Today's real new chapter is on the Mahayana treatise, specifically from the Mādhyamaka school: Śāntideva's Bodhicaryavatara ("How to Lead an Awakened Life").

The book noted the different metaphors Buddhaghosa and Śāntideva used, gleaned easily even from the title of their treatises. Buddhaghosa emphasized "purification," that is to say, removing negative qualities to purify one's conduct. Santideva's is a path of accumulation, which is where you collect noble qualities like Pokemon. These virtues are, you guessed it, the pāramitā, "perfections."

Pāramitā is such a Mahayana concept. As soon as you see these being mentioned, it's gotta be a Mahayana school. It harkens a bit to virtue ethics, methinks, as espoused by Ancient Greek philosophers.

Honestly, we haven't really gotten far into this subchapter. Garfield is an expert on Santideva's treatise, so he has a lot to say about it. In comparison, Visuddhimagga was more of Maria Helm's expertise, if I recall correctly.

For now, my favorite part of this subchapter is about the difference between the so-called "aspiring" and "engaged" modes of practice.

Aspirants are people who learn from philosophical classes, reading, reflections, and discourses—good old discursive knowledge you get by "hearing from others." It's good intentions—but no actions yet. That's not all; to hear about ethics from secondhand sources like that is to gain knowledge through concepts and abstract thoughts communicated by other people. That means a certain level of reality distortion not unlike learning about philosophy through stories and fiction and nonfiction articles.

To Santideva, one has to really put what they have heard into experiments and practice because then that knowledge becomes direct and experiential. "Knowledge gained from perception itself."

To practice the path of the Bodhisattva, empiricism is of utmost importance. "Knowing" isn't enough. "Seeing" is more important.

I agree with that, even if cognitive science would argue against framing perceptions as direct and less distorted than "discourses." Again, human brains are not that reliable.

We're mostly in agreement here, however; the reason why I favor ethics and phenomenology in philosophy over shits like metaphysics is because these are domains that can be put into practice. These are intellectual naval-gazing that influence actions, and therefore effects!

... Heh. "Empiricism" reminds me of someone.

---------

I wanna start reading The Lies That Bind starting this week.

I'm gonna bring it to that stupid wedding anyway. Might as well start reading now.

I already like the quote Kwame selected.

[mikeyddie]

* Yo @purple-striped-shirt !! The second part is here!! I hope you like it :D Let me know if I missed anything you specified or if I can change anything ^^

* “Edd, we need to talk,” he glanced back at you,

“Okay,”

You dragged him back inside and sat him on the couch.

“Tom!” You called out.

Thankfully Matt and Tord were already in the living room, but you needed to let everybody know about this.

He came down the stairs a minute or so later and plopped onto the couch.

“What’s up?” he questioned.

You sighed.

“This is going to sound really dumb,” you prefaced. 

“But Edd is- well..” you thought about a good way to say it.

“Matt, that little bottle you found at the store. It was a love potion,” you finally said.

Tord stared at you for a moment before chuckling. 

“Wait are you serious?” Tom inquired.

“Look- I know it’s stupid-” you were quickly interrupted by Tom bursting out into laughter.

You face palmed, not really having expected a different response, but it certainly wasn’t the one you wanted. 

“Dude, just listen. Edd was flirting with Eduardo just a second ago. He wouldn’t even do that as a joke!” you exclaimed, causing Tom to pause.

Edd smiled at the thought of said man.

“Oh my god- that’s what that was??” Tord piped up.

“See, I have a witness,” you chuckled under your breath.

“I-” Tom inhaled deeply.

“I’m gonna go back to my room,” he stood, but you quickly pushed him back onto the couch.

“No, you’re not.” You glanced over at Edd for a second.

He was staring out of the window, paying you and the guys no mind. You wouldn’t be surprised if he hadn’t been listening at all to what you just said. You followed his gaze and realized one of the windows peered straight at the neighbors house. 

“Hey, Edd, can you look for my charger? I think it’s somewhere upstairs,” you asked, waving your hand in front of his face.

“Oh, sure,” he trailed up the stairs.

Truthfully, your charger was plugged in in the kitchen, but part of this you didn’t want Edd to hear.

“Okay, I dabble a bit in magic, so I’m going to try and find or make a cure to this because- well if I don’t soon,” you glanced out the window.

“Edd’s actions will,, escalate.” You hesitated.

“Why don’t you three fix that while I go to the store, eh? Who wants ice cream?” Tord spoke up.

“Nope. You’re helping,” he groaned.

“Why wrap us into this? Just fix Edd yourself,” Tom added.

“Trust me, you don’t want that. Plus, if I’m able to make a cure it’ll probably take at least twenty-four hours.” you glanced over at Matt who was only half paying attention.

“Matt, Tord,” they perked up. “You two will be my assistants,” Tord threw his head back and groaned again, really rubbing in how much he just wanted to go about his day like any other.

“Tom, keep Edd away from the neighbor’s house,” If he had eyes, he’d had rolled them, you were sure.

“I’ll talk to Mark and Jon in a bit. I just need to make sure I have everything I need first. Come on,” you gestured for them to follow you. 

“Hey, Edd, I found it. You can come back down, sorry,” you lied. 

But there wasn’t a response.

You entered his room which you two shared. He was staring out of his window which- of fucking course looked into Eduardos room. This wasn’t going to get any easier, was it.

“Okay, that’s enough of that.” you peeled Edd away from the window and turned to face Tom.

“Why don’t you two go to the arcade,” you suggested, pushing Edd toward the blue hooded anger ball. He sighed and grabbed Edd’s arm, taking him out.

You shook your head and closed the curtains.

“Alright,” you kneeled down and stuck your hands under the bed, fishing around for something. 

Once you felt it, you pulled forward a chest. You pulled a small key out of your bun and unlocked it. (lol this is silly but I wanted to add it) It was filled to the brim with very illegal magic stuff. Matt and Tord were taken aback, Tord more focused on the law breaking, but Matt was intrigued by the magic.

“Woah!! That’s so cool!” he exclaimed.

“Hehe, thanks,” you reached under again for a small cauldron. 

“I’m holding back everything in me to call you a witch right now,” Tord joked. 

You shared a chuckle before looking through the items filling the chest. You pulled out a few components you’d need for the counteracting potion and set them aside, closing, locking, and pushing back the chest.

“Okay, I’m gonna go speak to the neighbors. If Tom and Edd come back keep him away from the windows,” you cringed at your own sentence. 

You stood and left the room, headed straight to Mark, Jon, and Eduardo. You knocked on the door. After a few moments, Eduardo opened the door.

“Uh- hey,” he glanced around you, searching for Edd, happy to see he wasn’t with you. 

“Can I talk to you three for a second?” you questioned, peering behind him. 

“Sure,” he moved to the side.

You weren’t necessarily friends with them, but you weren’t enemies either. Well, you and Jon were friends but that was also because he hung out with Matt a lot and you and Matt are pretty close. In short, you and the neighbors are cool.

“Hi, (Reader)!” Jon greeted kindly, waving. 

“Hey,” you returned his smile. 

“What’s up?” Eduardo began.

“Okay, this is going to sound stupid,” you repeated.

“But to explain earlier-” Eduardo perked up.

“Matt found some weird potion at the shops, and I knocked it over onto Edd’s toast. He is under the effects of a love potion,” you awaited their reactions.

Mark chuckled. 

“I thought potions were only in movies,” Jon spoke.

“Yeah,” Eduardo was clearly stifling a laugh.

“If this is some elaborate prank, it’s not funny,” he continued. “Well, at least not how you’re intending,” 

“I’m not joking,” you sighed. 

Eduardo couldn’t help but laugh, Mark joining. Jon was more confused than convinced, but part of him believed you.

Suddenly, you heard a thud. You turned to see Edd, his face and hands smooshed against the window. Once Eduardos gaze met his, he waved excitedly, his face a bit red.

“Jesus,” Mark let out, no longer laughing.

“Uh, why is Edd on the window?” Jon asked. 

“(Reader), you can tell him to stop, I know you guys are joking,” Eduardo wasn’t laughing either.

“Do you really think I would have Edd do this? Do you think he would do this?? Not unless he was under some kind of potion,” you emphasized potion, hoping Eduardo would believe you. 

“Look, Eddo, whether you believe me or not, you need to stay away from Edd. He will stop at nothing,” you said, shortening his name. You’d only heard Mark call him that, but you thought it was kind of funny.

“Mark, Jon, don’t answer the door if it’s him.” you added. 

They nodded. 

“Yeah, I think I’m gonna do that,” Eduardo jogged up the stairs.

You turned back to wave at Mark and Jon before exiting their house.

“Edd, come on. You can get arrested for this kinda shit,” you didn’t want to be mean, but there was no nice way to tell your friend not to stalk the neighbors. 

You grabbed him and began walking toward your house until you realized Tom wasn’t with you.

“What the,” you looked around. He was no where in sight.

“Edd where’s Tom?” you inquired.

“The arcade,” he smiled, staring dreamily at Eduardos house.

You sighed and pushed him inside.

“Tord, Matt, please keep him inside and close the curtains,” you turned before they could reply and headed to the arcade. 

There you found Tom playing some shooting game. 

“Dude!” you lightly punched his arm.

“Huh? Oh, hey, (Reader),” he paid you little to no mind.

“You were supposed to be watching Edd,” you glanced between him and the game, referring to your love-sick friend like a child being babysat.

Tom merely shrugged. You snatched the plastic gun from him and shot at all the wrong angles, making him lose quickly. 

“Hey!” he exclaimed angrily. 

“What was that for?” he realized Edd wasn’t next to him and looked around. 

“Where’d he go?” he muttered under his breath.

“The neighbors window,” you said in a matter-of-fact tone.

Tom stared at you for a moment before face-palming. 

“I got distracted,” 

You groaned quietly.

“Come on,” 

You two went back to the house where you made sure all the windows were closed and covered and began making a counteracting potion. Which was actually easier than you’d expected, but still difficult. Specifically, because of how long it would take. Some mixed ingredients would need to sit for multiple hours, for example. It was going to be a long process. But in the end it’d be worth it. After an hour or so of mixing up different components and making mistakes, you decided you’d take a break. You trudged down the stairs.

“Where’s Tord and Tom?” You questioned Matt who was in the kitchen, getting a snack.

“Tom is in his room and I think Tord is showering,” he replied, fetching a can of cola from the fridge.

“Oh, okay.” you turned before noticing the lack of Edd.

“Where is,” you inhaled sharply, trying not to raise your voice. “Where is Edd?” you turned back to Matt.

“He said he needed something from the store,” Matt closed the fridge and took a bite from the sandwich he’d just made.

“You never learn,” you muttered.

“Huh?” you shook your head and walked outside.

Sure enough, Edd was- ohmyfuckinggod. He was looking through Eduardos bedroom window, again. The curtains were closed but there was just a big enough sliver for him to see inside. From what you could tell, Eduardo was changing his shirt. Jfc, this is hard to look at.

“Edd Gould!!” you shouted, similar to an angry parent.

He jumped and glanced back at you.

“Hi!” he waved, acting like he hadn’t been doing anything.

“What is wrong with you? Get over here,” you demanded, but he didn’t budge.

“But it’s nice out, isn’t it? Why not enjoy the fresh air?” he scratched his nape.

You glared at him. He wanted to oblige but the look on your face told him he should probably listen.

--------------------------------------------

It’s around 4PM now. Edd was sleeping on the couch, Tord next to him scrolling through channels on the TV. You and Matt were up in your room. You’d taken the potion back out of the trash since there was still a little left in it. You needed it to study what was in it and how it entered the victims mind, yk. There was a lot you’d need to know in order to make a potion to fight it. Matt was currently holding onto it while you were adding to the cauldron.

“Hey, do you guys-” Matt jumped at the suddenness of Tom entering your room. 

The corkscrew wasn’t in the bottle so just enough liquid managed to splash out and into... oh my god. Into Tom’s mouth. Today could not get any worse. Is what you would say if you’d even been looking at the two, which you were not. You were paying close attention to your work as not to mess it up, so you didn’t even manage to notice Tom coughing at the disgusting taste. 

“Aw- gross!” Tom looked down at Matts hand to see what he’d just swallowed. 

Of course, to his horror, he was about to fall in love with whoever he looked at when it took effect. He fought the urge to swing at Matt, closing his eyes and- just for good measure- covering them with his hands.

“Matt, hand me the-” you turned, seeing Tom.

“Oh, hey. What’s up?” you questioned.

Habit and muscle memory fucked Tom over as he looked up at you. The potion took effect soon after.

“Your uh- your hair looks nice today,” he complimented, shyly.

Tom wasn’t one to be straight forward or, hell- even say anything if he had feelings for someone. So it would be pretty easy to tell. But you, of course, didn’t. I mean friends compliment each other, right? Though you were a little surprised, seeing as it came from Tom of all people.

“Oh- uh, thanks,” you smiled.

“Is that all or did you need something?” you questioned, putting down the small bottle you’d been holding and standing up, walking up to the two.

“Matt, could you,,” you held your hand out.

“Oh, yeah, sorry,” he gave you the nearly empty teardrop shaped bottle.

“Wait,” you held it close to your eye.

It had definitely lost some of the liquid, and it was dripping on the side.

You looked back up to see Tom’s cheeks were lightly dusted in pink as he stared you down awkwardly. You looked back at Matt who was a little nervous.

“Again??” you glared at Matt before walking back to the cauldron and placing the bottle next to it.

“I’m taking a break,” you pushed past the two.

“Matt is driving me up the wall,” you mumbled, half joking, as you sat between Edd and Tord.

“Hm?” Tord turned to you.

“He spilled the potion on Tom,” you leaned your head back, running your fingers through your hair.

Tord snorted. “Seriously? Who’d he fall for?” he stifled a laugh as he awaited your response.

“Me,” you said, too quiet for Tord to hear.

“What was that?”

“Me!” you shot back up, looking at him.

He burst into laughter, both feeling bad and finding it absolutely hilarious.

“Hey,” Tom entered the living room. Tord paused.

You scooted closer to Tord, father from Tom.

Tom gave Tord a dirty look. Oh no.

“Wanna hang out?” he questioned you.

You glanced at Tord. 

“Uh,” you inhaled sharply.

“I’m a little busy,” 

Tom, being Tom, dirtied the expression he sent Tord. There’s no way he thinks that, does he?

“Back off,” he hissed.

Oh, Jesus Christ. Tord continued laughing, hardly able to contain himself.

“There’s no way!” Tord exclaimed through his giggles, finding nothing but humor in this whole situation.

The laughter woke Edd, who looked around confused.

“What’s going on?” he asked, tiredly.

“Tom, please go back upstairs,” you said.

“Ohhh, no.” he rolled up his sleeves, walking closer to Tord.

You stood, grabbing the Norskis arm and quickly leaving the house to let Tom cool off and hopefully not attack Tord. You two stood outside, waiting for him to calm down from the laugh attack he’d been hit by.

“This is the funniest shit ever,” he added once he’d finally caught his breath.

“Love’s in the air today,” you joked,

“No kidding,” 

“Forget the break I need to finish this potion now,” you reentered the house, Tord following. 

You grabbed a broom from beside the door as Tom stepped up to you.

You held out the broom, keeping yourself a good distance from him. Tord, of course, couldn’t help but giggle. Edd did the same when he saw.

“Back-” you chuckled. “Back up, dude,” 

“Wh- I just wanna hang out,” Tom looked a little hurt.

“Yeah, but, I’m pretty busy right now,” Once you made it to the stairs, you dropped the broom and ran.

The second you entered your room, you locked the door.

“What happened? I could hear you guys from up here,” Matt began.

“I don’t wanna talk about it,” you sat next to him.

------------------------------------------

It was about 7:30 when you finished the counteracting potion. Well, the first version, at least. God knows it could take far more to get it right. You snuck downstairs, tiptoeing behind the couch to avoid the three watching TV in the living room. You grabbed a few glasses and prepared some hot cocoa. Once it was done, you mixed one of them with the teal-colored liquid you’d made. Thankfully the color didn’t change. You leaned over the couch, hesitantly.

“Made some hot cocoa,” you spoke quietly, half hoping they wouldn’t hear you.

Tom turned.

“Oh, thank you!” he gave you a smile and took the cup.

You stood there for a moment, watching him blow on it before taking a sip.

“Well, are you gonna get us any?” Tord asked, glancing back at you.

You held up your index finger at him instead of saying to wait a minute.

Something in Tom’s demeanor changed as he relaxed into the couch, similar to how he usually sat. More slumping than anything.

“Hey, Tom,” you spoke.

He looked back at you.

“Hm?”

“How do I-” you paused, cringing before you could even finish the sentence. “How do I look today?” 

Tom eyed you, wondering if you’d done anything different or if you were testing him for some reason. He didn’t see anything out of the norm.

“Uh, normal? I don’t know, what do you want me to say,” he questioned, caught off guard by the question. To be fair, today had been very strange.

“Oh, thank God,” you let out quietly. 

Though, while paying full attention to Tom, you hadn’t noticed Edd stand and leave the house. As soon as you noticed your breath hitched.

“This doesn’t get any easier does it,” you rushed back into the kitchen and mixed your potion with his cocoa and sped out the door.

You looked around, seeing him nowhere. Though, you did notice the door of the neighbor’s house was cracked open... with a paper clip sticking out of the doorknob. You nearly dropped the glass in your hand, running inside.

“Mark?” you called. “Jon? Edd???” 

You placed the glass on the coffee table and looked through the house, not finding anybody. 

“Please!” you heard. “I’ll only be a minute!” It was Edd, upstairs.

“No, back off, dude! Eduardo doesn’t want to see you,” Mark replied. 

You rushed upstairs, seeing them and Jon standing outside Eduardos bedroom.

“Leave me alone!” you heard him shout from inside.

Edd noticed you. 

“You are literally stalking him! You broke into our house for Christs sake!” Mark exclaimed, blocking the door.

“Edd!” you grabbed his arm.

“This had gone too far, come here!” he tried to pull away from your grip, but couldn’t.

You rushed back down, Edd nearly falling as he raced to keep up. You took the now cold cocoa off the table and held it out to him.

“Drink it,” you demanded.

He stared at you for a second.

“Edd Gould!” you, again, shouted like an angry parent.

“Okay, okay!” he took it and gulped down most of it.

After a moment he looked around the house, confused.

“What th- why are we in here?” 

You exhaled deeply in relief, your head falling to his chest as you pulled him into a hug.

“I’m gonna beat your ass if this ever happens again,” you let out,

He awkwardly pat your back.

“Is he normal?” Mark questioned, trailing down the stairs with Jon.

“Yeah,” you pulled back.

“What??” Edd turned to face them.

“Eduardo! He’s back to normal!” he called.

You heard the door open and Eduardo peeked out from the hallway.

“Eduardo,” Edd growled like usual.

Eduardo rushed down and punched him in the face.

“Dude!!” Edd looked down at Eduardo.

“Get out of my house,” Eduardo was tired of this shit lmao

“Please,” he added when nothing happened.

You turned and pulled the paper clip out of the doorknob and waited for Edd to join you. You two walked back to the house. You told Edd about everything he missed- you’d never seen him so appalled and apologetic. It was a little funny.

The end

-------------------------------------------------------

* YOOO THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE!! I HOPE YOU LIKED IT :D 

[atlasalexanderwrites]

Final Fantasy Prompt Dabble

Word Count:872

Fandom: Final Fantasy

A/N: Quick dabble! Really rusty with writing for FF XV! Just a quick daily prompt piece!

It could never be said that Gladio Amicitia was protective of only Noctis. When it came to the future shield of Lucis, he took his duty as protector of the royal family very seriously and went beyond just one prince. This was especially true when Ignis Scientia was also around.

Let it also be known that Gladio most certainly did not put up with creepy assholes hitting on the Princess of lucis even after she had blatantly told them she was in no way interested in their advances. 

Everything happened so quickly. 

One moment, the four of them - Noctis, Princess Y/n, Ignis, and Gladio - were all sitting in the dinner eating lunch, laughing and talking about some charity event the Citadel had thrown together and would be hosting the next night. And the next some sandy haired, brown eyed punk was standing beside the table, all smiles with his arms crossed over his chest like he was trying to look like he had never missed a work out in his life (which was ridiculous compared to Gladio).

“Hey baby, what are you doing with these three?” the stranger had asked, leaning down and nearly sticking his elbow in the Princess’ mashed potatoes “Why don't you come and sit with me and my friends and hang out for a bit.”

Y/n was quick to reach across the table and grab her brother’s wrist, keeping him from doing anything. Smiling passively up at the stranger, she refused him saying, “That’s very sweet of you, and I appreciate the offer, but I’m just fine here, thank you.”

The anger from the rejection was immediate, and the stranger didn’t even hesitate to grab Y/n’s arm and pull her from the booth while growling, “Listen here you little bitch…”

Y/n wasn’t scared; she was annoyed but not scared.

But she didn’t have time to show that before Noctis, Ignis, and Gladio had all gotten to their feet. It was Ignis who placed a hand over the stranger’s and leveled him with a stoic glare while saying, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you, friend. She isn’t one to go harming.” While his words probably came off as diplomatic, the stance Ignis and the other two took spoke volumes on how ready the three of them were to fight in order to defend the Princess.

The stranger scoffed as his two friends moved over to the party, “Like I’m afraid of you. Glorified armed guards for royalty. Some good that’s done in this war, huh?”

“Well, we haven’t lost any member of the royal family so I would have to say yes.” Ignis hummed in mock thoughtfulness

“Just let her go, asshole.” Noctis demanded, a blue glow beginning to shine in his hand as if ready to draw weapons from the armiger. 

“Uh...dude...that’s the Princess. You...you should let her go.” the guy’s buddy stammered, eyes wide as he and the other friend seemed to realize just who their main friend had decided to bother. 

Y/n nodded her head in agreement, “That’s right. Let me go and walk away. We’ll pretend this never happened.”

By this point they had drawn the attention of the other diners and a few of the employees had gathered nearby, watching and seeing if they needed to interfere. The first guy took notice of this and looked from the Princess to the three she was with and then to his friends. Slowly, he released Y/n’s hand and the Princess was moved behind Ignis and Gladio.

‘Whatever.” the guy grumbled, fixing his shirt “Stupid bitch isn’t worth it anyway.”

The punch was a little excessive, but the speed in which Gladio landed his fist against this guy’s face - knocking his ass to the floor - was impressive nevertheless. 

“Gladio,” Ignis sighed in disapproval

The guy and his two buddies quickly hurried for the door, the first guy screaming curses and threats at Gladio as they went.

Fuming, Gladio followed them outside and shouted as they ran to a parked car a little ways up the street, “If I ever see you anywhere near her, you’ll have to deal with me! This was only a fucking taste of what I’ll do!”

“Oh Gladio.” Ignis mumbled as he gestured for Noctis and Y/n to sit back down, “The press is going to have a field day with this.”

“As will the big three.” Noctis snorts picking up a fry and popping it into his mouth

Y/n sunk low in the booth, “Dad, Clarus, and Cor will just...I’ll explain everything to them.” It’ll be better that way. The Princess of lucis had all three men wrapped around her pinky; they were more likely to get out of trouble if she talked to the King, the Shield, and Marshal than her hot headed brother, the often arrogant and imposing Gladio, and the cooly-collected Ignis.

“Let’s just finish our lunch,” Ignis instructed as Gladio appeared and retook his seat

Y/n smiled in appreciation at Gladio, though did her best to do it when Ignis wasn’t looking so they didn’t risk being lectured for half an hour on not encouraging inappropriate behavior such as Gladio had just displayed.

[slashesotron]

Have the picture I meant to post with his MC meme- him dressed up for a goth club!- and some bonus oc memes under the cut. (Yes, some ocs are censored. You’ll have to wait to meet them! :3c Also, his sim isn’t quite accurate bodymod-wise.)

Atlas facts! 🐞

Atlas has ‘truth’ and ‘loyalty’ tattooed on his chest and stomach in Latin. It’s there for a reason; he doesn’t lie unless telling the truth would endanger or embarrass someone, and he’s absolutely ride-or-die loyal, even if he… shouldn’t be. These aren’t traits he’s had to try at; they’re innate, and he can’t help but act in accordance to them.  

His voice is a lot lower than you’d probably expect, and he isn’t super emotive- not entirely monotone, but his vocal expression is fairly muted. He’s friendly though, and likes talking to people- even if he mostly listens.

He bluescreens / has a tendency to deer-in-the-headlights around pretty girls, and will give her the shirt off his back if she asks. Basically, you know in movies when someone sees the love of their life and they’re depicted with, like, a rosy sparkle filter over them? How Atlas Sees Every Woman. He’s just like, whoa. I’m in the same room as a goddess??

He’s entirely respectful, though; he does his best to be polite and friendly like he is to everyone else, he just… fumbles a lot. His admiration is more reverent than anything selfish. 

He’s utterly oblivious to flirting from dudes until it’s very, very overt. He just figures they’re being friendly and doesn’t tend to consider oh hey, maybe he’s into me. He’s far too humble to assume anyone is into him, tbh, until they have him pinned against a wall or something. 

Asking for what he wants is hard for him; making the first move is practically impossible. As a result, his romantic & sexual experience rates in the ‘count-on-one-hand’ category… and not the whole hand, either.

He dabbles in vulture culture, and he’s comfortable hunting and dressing/butchering a catch. He considers using as much of the animal as possible respectful, and the best way to honour the life given.

He’s a gunsmith and a brewer; it’s the family business, and he’s been training for it since he was young.

He and his remaining family (an uncle) live in a fairly remote location- a cabin that doubles as the shop in a sparsely-populated, heavily-wooded area. His uncle is away for long stretches of time for work, so Atlas spends a lot of his time alone.

He’s self-conscious about his teeth! They’re uneven and pretty crowded, and he’s got a space between his fronts. He’s got nothing to worry about tho, it looks cute.

He grows the world’s worst facial hair. Barely any, nowhere useful, and super sparse. He only needs to shave like once a week, if that. 

He’s a bit of a twink- slender, not a ton of fuzz (but he does have some), though the work he does means he’s got a bit of lean muscle. His body type is inclined toward skinny, though, and if he was removed from the exercise he usually gets (for some reason), he’d start losing that muscle fairly quickly. 

He has a secret bedside drawer where he hides his naughty stash. He hopes no one ever finds it- it would be mortifying! You won’t look in there, right?

Here’s his aesthetic board [bug/spider warning] and his kink list! 🐞

It’s low, but it’s not as low as this chart makes it look, either. My kingdom for a voice claim…

Yeah, he’s horny as fuck. He’s never gonna say it though.

This man’s #1 fantasy is having a girl ride him while pinning him down/choking him. He’s never actually bottomed before and he’s nervous about the idea.

[obxdrewseph]

High Maintenance - Rafe Cameron

Description: Rafe Cameron is SICK of high maintenance girls. Sick of them. After he dumps his latest girlfriend for being too clingy, annoying, and picky with her food, he vows to never date a high maintenance girl ever again. Once he befriends an outspoken girl in his male-dominant Shakespeare class, his entire mindset changes. 

once again, please pretend covid does not exist in this scenario ;-; one day i will write about zoom classes or an online romance... but that day is not today

-----

“I just can’t do this anymore!”

“Why not? Rafe, c’mon now--”

“No, you want this, then you want that, you’re so fucking high maintenance. And, all my friends think so too.”

Rafe spat as he hurriedly got his keys from his now ex-girlfriend’s shelf. 

“Your friends are douchebags!” The girl yelled, throwing random clothes and items at the boy. He rolled his eyes at her words. Of course she would say something like that. All the girls did. They forgot how big of a douche Rafe Cameron is too. 

“Did you seriously tell me you need to be taken on dates at least 3 times a week? Gracie, we have classes 5 days a week and Saturday is for the boys!” 

Rafe Cameron HATED high maintenance girls. 

Despised them. 

Hated when they were too clingy and needed too much attention, hated when they picked at their food like it was poisoned, or when they went on a diet and he couldn’t go to his favorite pizza restaurant. 

He hated all of that shit. 

He didn’t understand why girls were so high maintenance when guys were so lowkey. None of his guy friends cared where they went out to eat, none of them ate salads when they went to a burger joint-- they all were easy to hang out with. 

That was not the case with all the girls Rafe had dated. 

“Fine, but don’t expect me to take you back when you come crawling back to me!!” She screamed, tears flooding down her face. He wanted to feel bad, but he couldn’t. She fake cried every other day to make Rafe turn off his video games and hang out with her. 

And all she wanted to do was talk! 

The boy knew if he said anything to that statement, it would end poorly so he just ran out the door and drove away.

From that day on, he vowed never to date a girl that was high maintenance ever again. 

-----

Rafe Cameron hated the first day of classes and this year, he hated them even more when he was forced to take a stupid English class for some Gen Ed (general education) requirement.

At least he got to take a class on analyzing Shakespeare. It was either that or Feminist Theory and no thank you. 

Unfortunately, he had a previous class pretty far away from the English building so when he arrived at said Shakespeare class, there were only a few seats in the front still open. Next to one of the only girls in the class. 

He quickly took the seat before any more people came in. 

The class was chatting loudly since most of them were dudes. And dudes had an easier time to other dudes. Rafe took a quick peak at the girl sitting next to him and noticed she was mindlessly scrolling on her phone. 

She looked a bit tense when he sat next to her and came to the conclusion that she was the type of girl who didn’t have many guy friends and didn’t know how to socialize with them. 

“Hi, I’m Rafe.” He introduced himself to put the poor girl out of her misery. Her eyes brightened when she heard a voice directed to her. 

Rafe noticed the way her blank face shifted into a big smile. Woah.

“Hi, I’m y/n, nice to meet you!” Her voice was bright and cheery. He did a quick analysis of the girl.

She was wearing light blue skinny jeans, ripped so she put some thought into her appearance. But, she was wearing a huge sweater over it. Something girls did to look cute, yet casual. But, the girl was wearing dangly earrings. He came to the conclusion he couldn’t decide who the girl was yet before talking to her.

“So, what made you take a class about Shakespeare?” He asked nonchalantly. 

The girl did nothing to hide her clear disdain of the man. It was written all over the face. 

Rafe did his best to hide his chuckle. Y/N was a nice refreshment to all the girls he had dated, and had known, who hid all of their emotions to only throw them back in his face when he did something wrong. He knew this girl wouldn’t do that to him.

“Ugh, don’t even remind me what class we’re in. I only took this class because all of the other English classes were full. Darn being a freshman. What about you? Are you into THE William Shakespeare?” She babbled which somehow Rafe found endearing. 

He shrugged. “I do dabble.” 

Once the girl realized that’s all he was going to say, she laughed. “Well Rafe, I see you’re a man of very few words.” She deadpanned. “Also, I think we are going to do a little more than ‘dabbling’ in this class, as you say, since this is a 400 level class.” 

Her honesty was quite refreshing to the boy who had been told lies to his whole life. He could tell she didn’t even know his dad paid lots of money for him to go to this school. He knew that was rich white privilege but it’s not like he could do anything about it. 

He then realized he hadn’t said anything to the girl for a few moments. 

“You know, you’re very refreshing to talk to.” 

“Yeah, I know. I get told that a lot.” 

This time, he laughed out loud. 

He totally got her character wrong. 

------

The Shakespeare class only met Mondays, Wednesdays, and then had quiz sections on Friday. 

When it hit 9:50am on Wednesday, which was the end of his business class, he rushed to English. He anticipated seeing this girl again and he didn’t know why.

He waltzed into class and saw the girl sitting in the front row once again. Since he rushed there, there were plenty more seats open. But he didn’t want to sit next to anybody else. He wanted to sit next to her. 

He plopped down next to her and took in her appearance. She was wearing makeup today, or maybe she wore some on Monday, honestly he had no clue. Her pink eyeshadow matched... her entire pink outfit. She was bold bold for wearing that to this class. All the guys were staring at her like she had just landed here from Mars or something. 

He was now confused at whether she was a lowkey girl like the girl he saw on Monday or if she was this girly girl. 

“Hey Rafe!” She cheerily said as he sat down. 

He smiled. “Hey. How’s your day going?” 

“Hmm, let’s see. I woke up feeling a bit weird because I had a funky dream. You know, have you ever had those dreams where you just look at the world a bit differently? Anywho, in the dream I was forced to torture this girl so that she would give up information, but then she wouldn’t ‘cause she’s kickass so I was ordered to chop of her head instead! BUT, I couldn’t do it and that’s the funny thing, you popped up and chopped off her head for me! Isn’t that funny? Since we just met?? I think it’s a sign that we are going to be great friends.” 

He felt his head spinning as the girl rambled about her dream and his place in them, but he somehow understood it all? Maybe this was a sign they were going to be great friends. 

“Are you saying I’m your hero?” He couldn’t help with flirt with her. She rolled her eyes and laughed, but he could still see her blush. Yeah, she definitely wasn’t used to guys flirting with her. 

“Wow, is that what you took away from my dream? Rude. Also! If we are going to be friends, I need to know your last name.”

“Cameron.” 

Her nose scrunched up. 

“Hey, what’s wrong with the last name Cameron?” He teased, nudging her arm a bit. Was this flirting or was he just being playful? He didn’t know either. 

“There’s nothing wrong with the last name Cameron, it’s just you have two first names... technically. But, I’m not judging! What’s funny is I could see you going by the name Cameron as well which is interesting. Rafe seems more like a tough guy name but you seem so... I don’t know. Calm? Chill?” 

He laughed. That was the first time someone has called him that. “What’s your last name?” 

“y/l/n. See? We’re friends now.” 

------

The girl was right. 

Over the past few weeks of class, Rafe and y/n had become friends. 

It wasn’t hard to befriend someone like y/n though-- she didn’t stop talking and seemed to always seem interested in what Rafe had to say. And he ate that shit up. She always knew the right words to say and was charismatic in her own right. The two even met outside of classes occasionally to study together. 

He had decided she was a pretty chill and lowkey kind of girl. Just the type he needed in his life. Yes, she talked a lot, but she carried what he lacked in conversation. It worked for them. She didn’t care how she spoke around him and let loose with her emotions and body gags-- she was so different from the girls he had been with before. It was nice. 

He had developed a crush on the girl, but he wasn’t sure how she felt and didn’t want them to get a weird relationship in class. 

It was a gloomy Sunday night and Rafe had another date with some random girl in his business class. He wasn’t that interested in her yet, but appreciated her confidence to make the first move. Girls rarely did that. 

Sadly, the date had just started and it was already going poorly.

They met at an Italian restaurant near the school, both taking separate cars so that they would have a way to dash if the date went bad. 

And the girl had ordered a salad and a cup, only a cup, of wedding soup while Rafe had to eat his ginormous plate of pasta. 

He hated when girls went to restaurants and ordered the tiniest thing. What was the point? What was her reasoning? Was it bad to ask? 

She also talked on and on about how she was going to take over her dad’s company and how her whole life revolved around business. All he heard was that she never had to lift one finger while everyone did everything for her. 

She was already too high maintenance for the boy. 

------

The next day, he went to class fired up from the date. He plopped next to y/n and turned to her immediately. She stopped typing and looked at him with curious eyes. 

“Uh oh, tough morning?”

He sighed. The date took way too long and he was trying to be a better person and sit through the entire date. Usually, he would just get up leave if the girl was boring, but this was sophomore year Rafe, not freshman Rafe. But, he barely got sleep as the girl talked away while he had an early class. 

He took one glance at the girl and was curious if she would care for his ranting. She was wearing sweats and a tank top today. It was too far into the quarter to care at this point. He appreciated it. 

He was going to just rant anyways.

“Just, I don’t get why girls feel the need to eat so little on dates. Like, we aren’t going to up and walk away if you down as much food as us. In fact, it’s pretty hot when a girl can! Especially at Italian places, they never order pasta or pizza-- only salads? I didn’t even know they sold salads at those places until I went on my first date.” 

His voice was louder than usual and this conversation carried to the boys around them. 

“Bro, I totally get that. I went through sooo many girls who nibbled on their food or just never ate around me in general. But my girlfriend now? I knew she was the one when I took her to a carnival and I swear she ate every food there.” 

Rafe nodded in agreement. “Right? Like it’s attractive!” 

More guys gave snippets of their dating lives and agreed that girls should just eat more because it is A) better for them B) it makes them hotter! 

“You guys are kind of being assholes right now.” 

The female voice that cut through washed them into a silence. 

Rafe had forgotten he was sitting next to the girl he was supposed to be ranting to. He had found comfort in these guys who were experiencing the same thing. He had ranted about this to Topper but he dated his little sister, and he knew she ate anything in her way. 

“Assholes? How are we being assholes?” A classmate who had just gotten finished ranting. 

“You’re being assholes because you’re judging a girl’s worth on how much she eats... like what the fuck? How does that even matter? Why does it matter what other people are eating? How does that affect you?” 

Rafe heard the bite in her words and he was shocked. She had always been so cheery and happy-go-lucky, but her tone was all anger and... sadness. 

“Plus, I’ll bet you 100 dollars that all of the girls who you say eat a lot are skinny as hell and before you say anything, there is nothing wrong with that. But, guys only find skinny girls attractive when they eat a lot. If, God forbid, they gain weight, or are fat, AND they shovel down food? They’re called gross.” 

The professor cut off her words before she could get more in, but her meaning still got through. All of the guys were sitting there like puppies who just got their toy taken away.

Rafe peaked at the girl during class and saw her eyes full of tears. 

He felt guilty as hell... but more confused than anything. 

He kept getting more and more curious about the girl sitting next to him. 

-----

The girl zoomed out of class as soon as it was over; she didn’t even wait for Rafe like she usually did. 

That hurt. 

Rafe laid in bed after he got back from all his classes and analyzed her words and her facial expressions. Damn he felt guilty. He thought back to all the girls he ridiculed for not eating and wondered what they were going through. 

He had a little sister of his own who downed any food she got-- but she always stayed skinny. Is this the privilege y/n was talking about? He never saw any big girls shoveling food in like his sister did... 

He rolled around in bed, frustrated at not talking to y/n more. 

-----

That Wednesday came and no one talked about her little outburst on Monday but they all were aware of y/n’s temper now. Somehow, Rafe became friends with the guys sitting behind them, learning their names were JJ, Pope, and Kelce. 

“Today class, I’m introducing a new project. It’ll be a group project and you can be in groups of 5 tops.” 

The class started muttering and choosing groups while the professor spoke. 

The boys behind Rafe hit him on the back. 

They pointed to the girl who wasn’t paying much attention to the boy energy in the room. “Y/n.” Rafe nudged. The girl looked up and Rafe almost forgot what he was going to say. “Group?” He finally spoke. He glanced back to the guys and then back at her. She turned around and nodded.

After class, Pope called them all together. 

“So, I wanna get started on this project as soon as possible. I got a ton of other work I have to do in my STEM classes and want to get the English out of the way. Are you guys cool with meeting Friday at 2 at the library next to the fountain?” 

A chorus of “sure” went around. 

-----

Rafe only had one class, the English quiz section, on Fridays, so he was early to the library. It was the library everyone chatted in, so it was bustling with students who had gotten a headstart on their weekend’s homework, or were chilling before their next class. 

He had ordered at the school’s Starbucks before sitting down and made sure to get enough for the whole group. Being rich has its perks. 

“Rafe!” A familiar voice called out. 

He looked up from his laptop and saw y/n walking towards him. He immediately smiled and patted the seat next to him. She smelled like flowers like usual, specifically Japanese Cherry Blossom which she informed him before. 

“Hey, you hungry? I bought these muffins for everyone.” The boy shoved a coffee cake towards her. He pegged her as a girl who liked sweets since her personality was so hyperactive and chatty. 

She shook her head. “No thanks, I ate before I came here.” 

“Hey guys!” JJ and Pope walked in together while Kelce came trailing behind soon after. 

“Oooh muffins!” JJ greedily downed the coffee cake Rafe had bought for y/n. It was his favorite too. “Damn, Cameron really comes through with the moneyyy.” 

Rafe rolled his eyes, but he was used to the comments about the amount of money he had. 

“Oh y/n, you want one?” Kelce offered her a blueberry muffin that no one touched. 

“Nah, I ate before I got here.” 

“C’mon, you have to try this pumpkin flavored one, it’s SO good.” Pope said, plucking off half the muffin for her to try. 

“No, really I’m not hungry.” 

They all paused. 

“Wait, y/n, don’t tell me you’re one of those girls who orders salads when they go out on dates.” JJ teased. 

Y/N’s eyes turned dark when the boys started laughing. Rafe sat there, unsure of what to do or say. He had been the one who started this whole debate between them, but when he saw how upset y/n got, he didn’t want to fight her. 

“Dammit she is! I never would’ve expected that from you. You seem so chill.” 

She scoffed. “So chill girls can’t turn down food from guys? What the hell does that mean?” 

“Well, usually chill girls don’t because they don’t care how they look to guys. But those high maintenance girly girls turn down food so they look better to guys. Pfft.” JJ said in his eccentric tone. 

That made the girl laugh. You know when a girl laughs during an argument, shit is about to get real. 

“Are you fucking serious? How is a girl high maintenance when she doesn’t ask for food all the time? Or when she doesn’t eat? How is she asking for more when she’s taking less?” 

“It’s so conceited for all of you to think that a girl is acting in a way to please you. Really, you don’t know her relationship with food. You don’t know what anyone’s relationship with food is so you shouldn’t comment on it.” 

Her face was red, something Rafe noticed happened when she got heated about something. 

“I really don’t want to talk about this anymore, can we just do this project so I don’t have to talk to you misogynistic douches anymore? Thanks.” 

-------

They finished most of the project in five awkward hours. 

Y/N was clearly still upset by the earlier conversation about food and Rafe wasn’t sure why she was getting so worked up over it. Yes, he knew the guys were pushing it. But, the issue seemed personal to her. 

“K, we are gonna head out now. See ya’ll in class.” JJ said while the three of them skedaddled in fear y/n would yell at them again.

It was now just Rafe and y/n. 

They cleaned up their stuff in a silence. They said nothing until they got outside since the library was quiet now. No one was in the library on Fridays. 

It was pretty late about now, nearing dinner time. 

“Wanna get some dinner?” Rafe suggested, maybe a peace offering to the girl who was still upset over something he never thought too hard about. 

Usually buying food for girls works. Like chocolate. He didn’t know how much ice cream he would buy for his girlfriends when they were mad at him. 

The girl stared at Rafe for a bit and sighed. 

“I don’t eat at restaurants.” 

“Why not?” Rafe was a bit surprised at her confession.. and confused. Not eating at restaurants? Why? 

“Because I’m on a strict diet, ok? God, I know what you’re going to say, that I’m high maintenance and all which I probably am but whatever.” The girl was on the brink of tears and Rafe was confused. All he did was offer her dinner. 

He ran after her when she started walking away. 

“Hey, I’ve been an asshole lately and I’m sorry. But I’m just confused. Obviously this subject means more to you than I thought.” He confessed. 

He pulled her down on a bench on campus. He was grateful there was barely anyone in sight since it was late. Everyone was either home or partying. 

She took a deep breath. Rafe could tell this was a hard topic for her. 

“So, long story short: I have IBS which stands for irritable bowel syndrome. It’s different for everyone but basically it means you can’t digest things well. And for me, I have pain every time I eat anything and for a long time I didn’t know what was going on. And now, I’m on this strict low FODMAP diet which is really weird and no one understands it. And I hate telling people what I can and can’t eat when they literally can just look it up themselves.” 

Tears start falling down her face as she speaks. 

“And it sucks because I used to be the type of girl who could shovel tons of food into her and feel ok but now my body isn’t what it used to be. I’m hungry, sad, and in pain all the time and...” 

Rafe enveloped her in a hug. She clung tighter onto him as she melted into his arms. He was so warm in this cold weather. 

He rubbed her back gently. “I’m sorry.” She nodded into his arm at his apology. 

“I get it. The worst part is I understand you guys. I’m annoying and high maintenance. I have to cook everything I eat which sucks because I’m a terrible chef. And what affects me the worst is bread which is why I had to turn down everything you offered. When guys ask me out to restaurants or on dates in general, I have to turn them down because I know they’ll judge me for being gluten free and dairy free and basically so limiting in choices. Plus, most restaurants don’t have all that, unless they’re Asian. I basically only eat at Asian restaurants and I guess I shouldn’t assume that you didn’t want to eat at an Asian restaurant but...” 

She was babbling at this point. 

“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking of taking you to an Asian restaurant but we can go next time.” She laughed. 

She had more of a hold on his heart than he thought. Suddenly he wanted to hurt all those guys who had hurt her in the past. Hurt her so badly that she didn’t even want to go on dates anymore. And he was pissed at himself for being one of those guys. Those shitheads. 

“Or I’ll cook the Asian food. I can learn.” He said in a teasing manner, but he was dead serious. He was about to look up everything about Asian food very soon. And he knew he was about to look up what the “low fodmap diet“ was because he had no fucking clue. 

She chuckled. “It’s fine, I’ve learned how to cook meals for myself now. And you’re right about me being high maintenance though which is what sucks. I’m the youngest child so everyone does everything for me anyways. I’ve been told that people want to protect me.”

She was right. All Rafe wanted to do was protect her.

It was in that moment that he realized he didn’t care if the girl was “high maintenance”. It she was the right girl, he would do anything for her. All he wanted to do for y/n at this moment was to treat her right, take her mind off her pain, and cook her the right meals so she wouldn’t be anxious. 

He then took her hand and tightly held it. 

“Thank you for confiding in me and making me see my douchey ways.” She laughed. He felt his heart lighten when her tear stained face smiled. He wanted to keep her like that forever. 

He gently took her chin and looked her in the eyes. “You deserve better than some guy who half asses your dates and doesn’t treat you right. You deserve a guy who does everything you need and more. You deserve to be treated like a princess.” 

“Even if I’m high maintenance?” She whispered. 

He kissed her on the forehead. 

“We’re all high maintenance, sweetheart.” 

------

A/N: if you’re reading this, thank you for reading this far!! :D

Also, please watch what you say about other people’s eating habits. It can damage them and like our y/n did say: you don’t know what their relationship with food is. Don’t comment on how much food is on their plate, don’t comment on how little food is on their plate-- just don’t comment on their food in general. Please be accommodating to other’s dietary restrictions and be kind to people-- you don’t know what they’re dealing with. 

What we eat and how much we eat DO NOT define us :)  

[entropic-introspection]

Final Fantasy XIV: A Quick(ish) Summary As Told By Someone Too Lazy To Recheck Exact Times/Things

1.0- We don't talk about it

A Realm Reborn (ARR)- for some strange reason the world got like, completely blown up 5 years ago, crazy! You are some dumb kid from nowhere in particular, with nothing but the clothes on your back and a weapon that is little more than a chunk of wood, or a book. Possibly just your fists. You have got 50 levels and a shitload of lore to get through until you reach the first expansion.

Essentially: you don't have enough money for chicken nuggets, your fashion game is nonexistent, and every high level player calls you a sprout and exhibits Concern about your every action (they mean well).

Garlemald bad, Ascians bad, Eorzea uhhh trying to be good but kinda racist/capitalist/pirates with a history of colonialism, Coerthas is French Catholic and in the Crusades with the dragons. Hydaelin... good? Confusing, for sure, often referred to as Mother in text. Primals bad and scary, but fortunately you are immune to their mind-fuckery techniques thanks to Crystal Mom and surprisingly good at kicking their asses. Garleans mad that you ""savages"" keep killing Primals, despite having a whole mandate against Primals and Primal summoning. Ascians mad that you keep killing Primals because Ascians are dicks. People die, there is an amnesia plot, some annoying twerp is annoyingly right about a lot of things and also you can't get rid of him, Moogles, possession, fucking Ancient Aliens Allagans (if it's a problem in ARR, it's Ascians or Allagans aight), and hey ho you go and kick Garlean asses until they throw a giant machine at you that they stuffed full of Primal juice. Such devastation-!

Then there is the slightly post ARR stuff, where we're still level 50-ish but not really into the next expansion. So basically, we meet Dragon Dad who slaps Crystal Mom's blessing off of you to build character, Ascians are once again dicks, Who The Hell Names These Things, wow Lysanderoth you're definitely not suspicious at all, and our annoying twerp is dabbling in politics and for some reason you're getting fond of him?? Just in time for...

Heavensward (Lvl 50-60)- Congratulations, you are now an enemy of the state! We return/flee to French Catholic Coerthas/Ishgard, where we get to room with our Dear Friend, Haurchefant.

Don't mind how all the high leveled players have started crying. This expansion is emotionally devastating, has a great storyline, and also features canonical consensual dragon vore as a plot point. You know that tweet that's all "Church bad because they won't let you fuck dragons"? Yes, that's Heavensward. You will still cry. We embark on an epic road trip with the annoying twerp (ft his existential teenage crisis), a famous dragon killer and sadboi, and a famous lady who advocates peace/fucking dragons. Somehow, none of you kill each other. Instead, you murder a weirdly attractive bug-man with good music and a desire for violence, a giant flying whale, and some old dudes. You also beat up the same Ascian from the first bit, again. And again, in his final(?) form. Dragon Dad has come along to watch your progress, and also check on his kids cause he's actually, y'know, the entire progenitor of the dragon race. Wow! His family is very sad, mostly. But he does like you, so hey, he can adopt you and have one kid that turned out ok and happy! Hahahahha there's no therapists in Eorzea :')

Then we get to deal with "Hey we ended your like 500 year+ Crusade and kind of upended your social structures, y'all good?" (no), something something Warriors of Darkness, something something Urianger sus, then ALISAIE JOINS THE PARTY. I love her ok, let me have this. She's the annoying twerp's twin, and she's more inclined to hitting things that politics and philosophy. She's also kind of crushing on you. Also Minfillia kinda fucks off to nowhere, which is weird, b/c she has been Important but also Not Involved with the plot for like. 8 years.

Stormblood (Lvl 60-70)- Return of Lysanderoth! Briefly. Before he fucks you over, again. And a bunch of other people, honestly. But hey, this puts Eorzea in open contention with Garlemald for the first time in years, instead of them hovering in an uneasy cold war. For the first goddamn time in the game, you canonically get your ass kicked. Hard. So hard you decide fuck it! And go overseas to Fantasy Japan/China to visit some nice people you helped out earlier. You get catfished. You meet a weeb. There's some pirates, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. There's Ravana take 2, this time in a slightly more 'Forever 21' phase. Wild, young, free, REJOICE.

You attempt to inspire rebellion (since your character doesn't talk much, this is quite difficult). Garleans crack down, and hey look, the dude who kicked your ass is back! Prince Zenos Yae Galvus, as by this point you've hopefully learned, even if you're bad with names like me. He kicks your ass again, but this time we break his helmet, and wait shit is he... kind of hot? Maybe? Fuck?? He pins you to a wall and tells you to find him later, it's all confusing and prompts strange butterflies in stomachs. (Side note: as a lesbian, I am making some assumptions here. Mostly based off of how I reacted to the idea of Tsukuyomi doing the same. Mm.)

Then he promptly fucks off, and to work off that sexual tension you square up and work with local friends on Rebellion! You get help from some neighboring nomads after proving you're cool enough to tame a bird, and this proves enough to free the area from Garlean control (for now). We go back to Eorzea, and prepare to kick Zenos' head in. He's playing hard to get though, so we gotta get through some other folks, learn hard lessons about war/colonization, and feel bad. AND THEN WE KICK HIS- oh no wait. Is he... coming on to us again? Oh jesus man, get a therapist, oh my god, this is awkward for us both. Turns out he's kinda depressed and just wants you. To fight him. To the death. There is some bullshittery and he becomes dragon. Fails to kill you, so he kills himself. (Spoiler: it doesn't stick)

The Garlean Empire is now pissed off at you, and Eorzea in general. Everyone is kung-fu fighting, but oops, Garlemald is preparing to commit ~war crimes~! Someone is doing something weird, which is making your Scion friends fall into comas, which is both very convenient and highly inconvenient, cause all of you are kinda needed right now! Zenos, or something in his body, is causing trouble as well. Look, even when we thought he was dead he was causing trouble.

Shadowbringers (Lvl 70-80): We find out what's been making our friends pass out- someone from another dimension has been trying to yoink you over to them, and like all attempts at using the Rescue spell, it just sometimes leads to hilarious accidents. In this case, some epic lag, so although your friends have only been out of it for a week or two at most, they've been in this other world for 5 whole years in some cases. Turns out, Garlean war crimes are all an Ascian plot (what isn't, by this point), and mysterious Crystal Exarch is hoping you can save this world and your own.

At this point, Yoshi P, the lead developer, pulls out a gun and asks if you've been doing all those side-quests and optional 48 man raids. He worked very hard on those, you know. He put in lots of lore. Then he asks if you remember all those dangling plot hooks from previous expansions. We're addressing a lot of those. And adding more. You are sweating and nodding frantically while scrolling a wiki on your phone.

You get to feel like you're in an Otome game, because there's two dudes being weirdly polite and interested in you, but also real snappish to each other in terms of "fuck off she's mine". Alisaie and Alphinaud off-screen character development. Urianger still sus. Thancred now a dad? Y'shtola still so good. A lot of things happen, and you get progressively sadder as the expansion goes on. You get a nice, great big burst of hope and love, and then SOMEONE is a DICK with a GUN. (It is not Yoshi P.)

Now you just feel bad. Your character feels bad. This is all build up for the A) some motherfucking revelations and B) the utter catharsis of "If you could take one more step... would you?" "What, all by myself?" "THROW WIDE THE GATE"

I have shed legitimate tears over Shadowbringers ok, between the music, story, and pacing it is an Experience. Oh my god tho, all the music from Shadowbringers is so good. La-HEE

[thevibrationofatoms]

Hi I keep getting new followers here now so uh I guess here's a quick like...rundown of what My Deal is.

The Solid Facts: I'm a 32 year old white and cis ace/biromantic married lady. Very ADHD, also very much an introverted scientist sort of nerd. This is the side blog of my main blog @linddzz

So like....what's the DEAL:

Fuck dude idk. Ive spent a good chunk of adult life being an ex-Catholic agnostic who dabbled in various paths of nature veneration type paganism. This blog was made years ago as a way for me to compile resources and ideas as I tried to find something I Vibe With. Spent a lot of time finding things just didn't seem to Feel Right, kept looking into various members of various pantheons (mostly Hellenic and Nordic) and also read a lot into reconstructive Druidism, found a lot of things that almost fit but never really felt anything from it. The more recent years I've shrugged and settled into a more secular general atheist nature veneration where I just like....kept in touch with seasonal cycles and gardened and brewed and read up on the local environment and it's history. Have been in a funk state for years of "well I sure would LIKE to Believe In Something but nothing seems to grab me."

Then I got called to Dionysus and by "called to" I mean that after years of him going "pspspsps" at me I turned around and went "WHAT????" I then panicked realizing that oh, this is what a call from the divine is like and I guess I'm not an atheist anymore.

I already had a like...vague knowledge that Dionysus is more than "WOOO PARTY" and that he had a lot of death/rebirth and wild nature vibes going on, but nothing concrete. Since a very concrete aspect has decked me out in ivy garlands slightly against my will I've been reading more scholarly stuff on him and keep needing to go sit down because everything I read has been like.....very very much matching up to the Vibes I get from the Dionysus in my head. A lot. They match a lot. I'm....hm.

So You're a Hellenistic Pagan then?

Hnnggg kinda??? I guess??? Idk man no one but Dionysus has tapped me and no one else waved back when I tried reaching out and reading on other dieties. I've been saying I'm Dionysian because he's the only one who grabbed me. Tbh the only other diety I even ALMOST felt something from was Odin and the most I got from there was a vague sense of "nah not quite there kid"

I honestly am so new to this shit that it's been days. I got hit in the third eye and have been reeling around a bit

So what's the Dionysus Aspect you're on about?

The image that pops to mind is a lithe androgynous young (or old, or middle aged) dude draped in leapoard skins and old vines and bones, golden snake-eyed and horned, almost entirely hidden in shadows of foliage, feeling like something alluring and dangerous and ancient, fully man and god and animal.

Also wearing shutter shades and drinking wine from his kylix using a silly straw and grinning.

You described yourself as an asexual introvert nerd which....doesn't sound very Dionysian

Oh I Know and I did point this out to him but all I get is that fucking dangerously happy fanged smug ass grin

You don't sound very Respectful of your new god

I live in comfort that if he expected breathless respect and nothing but sweet veneration he wouldn't have slung an arm around me. I had no say in this so he gets what he gets damnit

If anything I feel like he's just entertained. Like one would be at a grouchy but harmless cat.

This is all a very recent development and if you want more stuff on how i relate to him and what the general Real Big Neon Signs were that he was tapping me, scroll on down. I'm also down to chat I guess but again, this is a whole new damn world for me

[jecrite]

so I just watched the ‘Inside the Mind of Hilary Hahn’ video and noticed something in that fire alarm story, so I wrote a little breddy excerpt about it - enjoy!

—————————————————

[starts from 35:54 in the vid btw]

If anyone was gonna watch that video, you could tell that Brett was nervous. I mean, meeting your violin idol, sitting next to her in front of Thai food, talking about anything and everything? What could go wrong?

Well, he could stop stuttering.

“I-I don’t know, I like to dabble in things,” he trails off, picking at his food. “But I need to...”

He sees Eddy in the corner of his eye, who was leaning back in his chair, his thoughts unreadable.

Eddy.

The scrawny kid with the mullet who sat to his right in maths tutoring. The vulnerable musician who he pushed around in a wheelchair when they were at the con. The messy, chaotic whirlwind who lives with him, who he chose over a soloist career.

The only thing who stayed constant in his many pursuits of something different.

For the first time that night, Brett lets the words come out of his mouth, pointed and assured.

“I feel like I need to be obsessed with it.”

He finally says, his eyes fixed on Eddy. Eddy’s face remains calm, pensive.

Has he said too much?

“Creating something, or... something.” Brett trails off to a halt, relying on Eddy to finish his sentence for him. Like he always does.

But he knew exactly how he wanted to finish it.

...or just being with him.

It feels weird to almost confess in front of Hilary (and, possibly, hundreds of thousands of people on the internet) that he’s obsessed with Eddy, but it also felt right in a way.

There’s really no other way to explain it.

He did not remember a day when he did not think of Eddy, what Eddy was wearing, how Eddy’s feeling, if Eddy’s eaten, if Eddy’s safe—

—if Eddy‘s just as obsessed with Brett as he is with him.

He should probably brush it off and stay present. It’s not like they’d notice.

Little did he know that Hilary was following his line of sight as he said it.

And he certainly did not expect when she smiled and asked,

“Are you obsessed with this?”

The urgency of the question snapped Brett out of his reverie, his eyes suddenly growing wide. The nonchalant tone in her voice sent a jolt through his body, causing him to flail his right arm between him and Eddy. “This?”

Fuck fuck fuck fuck—

“Yeah.”

You know what, fuck it.

“Ye-ah,” his voice rises, almost defensively. Eddy erupts with laughter, light and breathy and perfect. Hilary joins in shortly after, pleased with herself.

“Of course!”

In a quick glance Brett turned to his right, seeing Eddy’s head pulled back in laughter with a huge grin plastered across his face.

Brett has yet to grow tired of that face.

He was obsessed with Eddy, and he always has been.

“That was a long pause,” Eddy chides, obviously amused.

Brett’s smiling now, Eddy’s voice putting him at ease. At this point, anything goes.

“Yeah, I was like, was that a trick question? Like, hmm,” he laughs, pressing his fingers to his chin. He steals another look at Eddy. His Eddy.

“Yeah of course, I love it.”

Oh, but Hilary Hahn knew better.

“Because you create a lot with...” she trails off expectantly, wanting him to fill in the blanks.

It was never about it, isn’t it? It’s always been about him.

Brett nods, almost too enthusiastically, filling the silence with anything but Eddy’s name.

“It’s fun.”

That’s when Hilary asked about working, where the moment passes, and he’s safe.

For now, at least.

*

“We should probably start cleaning up. We only have fifteen minutes left in here,” Hilary huffs, leaving her seat as she picked up the plastic cutlery from the food containers.

“Yeah...” Eddy trails off, before he quickly stands in surprise. “Wait!”

Hilary froze, a stack of paper plates in hand, and Brett almost jumped from his seat. “Dude, What is it?”

“Practice review! We were meant to show them a clip of Hilary practicing!”

Shit.

“Oh, right,” Brett looks up at Hilary. “Maybe we can film it outside?” He offers apologetically.

Eddy clucks his tongue. “With those a Capella people? No way—“

Brett thought aloud. “Maybe if we clean up in like 5 minutes, we could film it quickly—“

“Or maybe just film it in the corridor—“ Hilary offers.

“Or, I could go to security and ask for 20 more minutes!” Eddy says, snapping his fingers. He looks over to see Brett and Hilary’s raised eyebrows, shrugging them off as he made a break towards the door.

“You two clean up, I’ll run to reception!” He shouts behind him, running at full speed.

Brett can only smile fondly as he left. What else was he gonna do?

His eyes meet Hilary’s and they can’t help but laugh at the younger man.

“He really is a whirlwind, isn’t he?” Hilary asks in a hearty chuckle.

“Yeah, he really is,” Brett grins as he placed the food containers back in the plastic bags.

Hilary hums.

“Is that what got you falling for him?”

He didn’t even have to say it.

The sound of the fallen plastic bags answered the question for him. The containers followed suit, bouncing off of the bags and onto the floor.

*

What a mess.

Hilary chuckles. “Sorry, too far?”

“No, no,” Brett chuckles nervously, hurriedly kneeling down to retrieve the plastic containers and putting them back in the bags. “Not at all, it’s just,”

Unexpected.

“Is it that obvious?”

An amused sigh. “Well, to a trained eye, maybe,” Brett swears she was smirking as she said this. “It’s the age old equation: you love him, he loves you, nothing else matters, might as well put the rings on now.”

She says it as if it was nothing, which prompted him to turn to the violin prodigy, furrowing his eyebrows.

“What gave it away?”

“Well,” Hilary starts, putting the plates in another plastic bag. “Maybe it’s because of the way he looks at you, or, the way your face just lights up when literally anything comes out of his mouth,”

Brett was standing now, having returned the containers in the bag.

“Or maybe that part when you said ‘our bed’ in that fire alarm story.” [which is from 14:12 in the video btw, you’re welcome]

The plastic bags almost escape his grasp again, but he caught it just in time.

“Oh my god,” he breathes out, horrified.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fu—

Hilary’s laughing now, high-pitched and bright. “Oh, don’t worry about it,” she says as he she pats his shoulder. “I’m sure no one will notice.”

He can already feel his face getting hot.

“But... but... but you did!” He exclaims, pointing an accusing finger at her.

Hilary’s laugh grew louder. “I did say I was trained, didn’t I?”

Suddenly Brett took an interest in the empty milk tea cups, only to look up again when the laughter stopped, and his eyes were met by expectant ones.

“Well?”

“Well, what?”

Hilary rolled her eyes and raised her eyebrows. “Do you really want me to say it again? We can’t have you picking containers up all night.”

Brett sighs, defeated. Eddy wasn’t here, why not just say it aloud now? While he can?

“Yes, Eddy’s a whirlwind,” he says, setting the plastic bags down on the table before making a start at tidying up the chairs. “But it wasn’t that that got me there.”

Hilary hummed again, urging him to continue.

“Eddy always tells me how brave I am, and how he wishes he was as brave as I was,

But I don’t think moving from place to place isn’t bravery. It’s cowardice.

Yeah, I like to dabble in things, sure, but that’s only because I’m so scared of staying in the same place. Being stagnant and... complacent.

I always wanted to do everything I wanted to do back then, moving to Sydney and all that, and I wanted that part of my life to be over and done with as quickly as I could.

Because, at the end of the day, I wanted to close that chapter and just... come back to him as soon as I can.

I realised that a couple of years into working with SSO, and once I did I knew what I had to do.”

“Come back to him,” Hilary echoes, smiling fondly at Brett.

“Exactly,” he resigns. He walked toward one of the chairs to grab his sweater before putting it on. “I never told Eddy this, but, when I saw him playing with Queensland I knew I didn’t want to go anywhere else. If I was going to travel the world like I’ve always dreamed of, I want him right there next to me.”

“And he still is,” Hilary nods.

“Yeah,” Brett’s head pops out of the sweater, grinning at his senior. “I guess that makes me the luckiest bastard in the universe.”

“What this about being a lucky bastard?” Eddy’s voice echoes the room, making Brett and Hilary jump, again. “Talked to the security guy in reception, he says he can only give us 15. I guess that’s enough for a little segment?”

Brett and Hilary looked at each other, eyes wide.

“Sounds good! I’ll grab my violin.”

Thank God for Hilary Hahn.

“Great! Lemme turn the camera on again,” Brett says, finally regaining his voice. He starts to walk towards the tripod until Eddy stops him, peering at the green light that blinked from behind it.

“What do you mean? We never turned it off,” Eddy says as he lifted the tripod and set it to Hilary’s direction. “Go, stand next to Hilary and we’ll just have editor-san cut the extra bits!”

[this bit is from 1:22:21 in the video btw!!]

Hilary, with her violin already resting on her shoulder, let out a breathy, nervous laugh as Eddy positioned the camera and ran towards them. Brett can’t even look at her in the eyes.

Nevertheless, he laughs alongside her, clasping his hands together.

“Practice review!”

“Practice, c’mon!”

Brett exhales deeply.

Oh my god, editor-san’s gonna have to cut that whole bit out.

“Okay!”

Shit.

[apparentlynotreallyfinnish]

Out of Bounds - Part 3

If you missed the first two parts, you can get caught up here.

A warm hug and a huge thank you to my lovely new beta @rhinkipoo! 

---

Link bounded into Rhett’s place like a curious puppy. Rhett locked the front door as he walked in after Link. He tried his best to not stare at his ass, but its sway was hypnotizing and the way Link’s jeans accented the perfectly perky cheeks made Rhett’s throat go dry. Suddenly parched, he walked up to the fridge. 

“Want something to drink?” he asked Link as the cold air hit his face, a vain attempt to cool down his heated thoughts. Rhett breathed deep before taking out a beer.

“Nah, I’m good,” Link said and drifted to Rhett’s bookshelf. Rhett remembered his morning run and swapped his beer for a fizzy water.

“Lots of thrillers,” Link remarked, tapping his fingertips lightly over the spines of the books haphazardly stuffed into the overflowing shelves.

“Mm,” Rhett hummed, non-committal, and uncapped the bottle. He tried to ignore the fact that his hands were trembling. A big gulp of cold water seemed to help him cool down a bit.

Rhett stood next to the fridge, leaning against the counter, watching Link as he riffled through his things. The apartment was small, only one main room, a kitchenette, and a sleeping alcove. The couch, desk, and the small foldable table with two chairs took most of the square footage of the main room. Rhett had never really minded the cramped quarters before, but now Link seemed to somehow fill all of the available real estate—both in the apartment and in Rhett’s mind. It made Rhett look at his place with a new set of eyes. 

He was not a neat freak by any measure, but he wasn’t a slob either. He did notice a pair of dirty boxer briefs discarded on the floor near the bathroom door and moved to quickly snatch them up and throw them into the hamper. As always, his bed had remained unmade. It was a bit embarrassing, and he wished he was the type to regularly keep his place tidy, but at least he’d changed the bedding recently. 

Link turned to look at Rhett and followed his gaze to the bed. He flashed a cheeky grin and his tongue poked out of the corner of his mouth. It was simultaneously cute and lewd. Rhett wanted to turn to hide the blooming heat on his cheeks, but he was determined to hold the eye contact. This particular situation might be new to him, but it wasn’t like he’d never hooked up with someone before. He didn’t want Link to know how out of his depth he was.

Rhett took another sip of his drink and watched Link let his gaze roam over his body for a brief moment, igniting a simmering heat inside Rhett’s gut. But when he was about to put away his drink and attempt to move things along, Link turned and skipped from Rhett’s bookshelf to his desk. He picked up a picture frame and studied the picture of Rhett and his family. Rhett gripped the bottle harder and tilted his head in confusion. Hadn’t Link wanted to hook up? He was more than sure that Link wasn’t nervous, so why would he want to take a detour through Rhett’s things? 

“You and you’re brother look nothing alike,” Link said, making Rhett laugh. They really didn’t and most people that met them liked to point that out. Link set the frame back on the desk and went through all the knick-knacks Rhett had gotten from his trips—little things he’d picked up on family vacations before college and from tournaments and away-games while attending NC State. 

All the while, he was making random comments about this and that. Rhett didn’t have time to reply before Link had moved onto the next thing that caught his eye. Link didn’t seem to mind his silence. After he left the desk, he crouched down to shift through the movies Rhett had under his TV-stand.

It gave Rhett time to pause and take a breath.

I just brought a guy to my place.

What am I doing? 

What do I want to happen? Am I really gonna fuck him? He offered, right? But was that just him being flirty? Is he expecting me to do other stuff with him? To him? Like, touch him… down there.

Rhett had no time to inspect how much the thought thrilled him when Link’s voice interrupted him. He was waving a DVD case towards Rhett.

“Oh, I’ve wanted to see this one! Is it any good?”

“It’s okay,” Rhett said, without actually seeing what movie Link had shown because Link was on the move again. He’d noticed the guitar propped up on the corner. His eyes lit up and he lifted the instrument.

“Do you play?” he asked and strummed the strings tentatively. Rhett shrugged.

“I dabble. I can almost play a few songs.”

“Hot,” Link murmured and set the guitar down. 

And then he was right there, their bodies pressed together, his mouth tasting Rhett’s neck with sloppy wet kisses that made him shiver and buck against Link’s stomach. Rhett’s brain screeched to a halt at the sudden change.

“Oh gosh,” he moaned when he managed to somewhat gather himself, fumbling to get his water bottle onto the counter behind him. He nearly missed and had to scramble to prevent a mess. Link’s hands were sliding under Rhett’s shirt, tickling his sides and pawing at his abs. His touch was firm but soft and when his fingers brushed over Rhett’s nipple, making it bud, Rhett drew in a breath between his teeth and silently begged for Link to touch him lower.

“Mmh,” Link hummed against Rhett’s clavicle, kissing it through his shirt and breathing in deeply. “You smell real good.”

This blushing thing has to stop, Rhett decided, feeling dizzy and flushed. He didn’t remember ever blushing like this when a girl complimented him. The bottle was now safely on the counter and his hands were finally free to roam all over Link’s tight body. And, fuck, did he feel good. All hard muscle and soft curves. How was that even possible? 

Before Rhett could even make a conscious decision to do so, his palms had found their way to Link’s ass and squeezed. Link made a low throat sound, something between a moan and a growl, and clamped his teeth onto Rhett’s shoulder, grinding himself against Rhett’s thigh. Rhett could feel Link’s hardness press against him.

“Tell me what you want, hotshot,” Link whispered between teasing kisses and bites along Rhett’s neck. Rhett swallowed hard and tried to muster up some kind of an answer. What did he want? 

“I really want you to fuck me,” Link continued with a breathy voice as he nibbled Rhett’s earlobe. “But if that’s too much for you, I could just get on my knees right here and suck you off.” Link’s palm moved to caress between Rhett’s legs.

“Fuck,” Rhett groaned, canting his hips towards Link, for more pressure, more touching, more Link. His head was spinning and profanity seemed to be the only thing he could get out right now.

Link let out a low chuckle. “Was that a request or just a reaction to this?” His hand pressed against Rhett’s jeans and moved along his hard length. Rhett couldn’t think. His brain was a fuzzy bundle of dirty thoughts and pleas that he couldn’t get out. He needed Link on his knees, his glistening pink lips around his cock, but he also needed a moment to think, to gather himself.

Gaining little sanity and hoping to slow things down for a beat, Rhett’s hands let go of Link’s ass and he cupped Link’s face for a slow, exploratory kiss. Link tasted of something sweet and alcoholic. Rhett couldn’t get enough of the way Link’s tongue swiped against his and retreated again and again as if coaxing Rhett into his mouth. Finally, Rhett obeyed and let his tongue slip between Link’s lips into the wet warmth of his mouth. Link had clearly been waiting for exactly that because he enveloped Rhett’s exploring tongue and sucked hard, making Rhett’s knees nearly buckle.

Rhett pulled away, drawing a shaky breath, trying to catch Link’s eyes but Link pounced on him, whining into his mouth as he kissed him again. Link’s hand wrapped around Rhett’s neck, pulling Rhett down or pulling himself up as if he was trying to climb Rhett’s tall frame. Rhett’s hands slipped down, grabbing Link’s waist to pull him down. 

“Dude, you gotta slow down. I’m losing my mind here,” Rhett managed to get out with a huff of a laugh. Link laughed too, a pleased,sharp sound that filled the room and Rhett’s chest with warmth.

“Wanna get in the bed? We can just kiss for a while and see where that takes us,” Link suggested, nuzzling his nose under Rhett’s ear. When Rhett nodded, Link’s fingers intertwined with Rhett’s and he was pulled towards his bed.

[deunan403]

Oh my gosh your ‘the name is English’ fanfic is so good. Any advice on getting like. The distinct voices of each of the characters? I’m just dabbling in homestuck fiction and I think I got Dave and rose and jade. But John and the alpha kids are hard

(Edited: I kept thinking about the mistakes I made in this explanation so I’ve finally gone back and fixed them pfffft, Also like... I think I might’ve misconstrued the kind of answer anon was going for, in which case, only the very end end of this long ass response is useful. Welp.)

SO FIRST OFF, I am insanely flattered anyone is asking my advice on how to write Homestuck characters because these are some of the most difficult characters I’ve ever written. Thank you so much! These kids each have an insane amount of dimension to them and I completely understand why they come off a bit intimidating to write correctly. I don’t even think I do that good of a job, lmao. Anywho, I’mma go ahead and apologize in advance because I got a little carried away with my advice. When I get to explaining things I like to over-explain and hope you just pick out what ends up bein actually useful to you. There is... a lot of shit under this cut, so be warned.

Hello! Welcome to this wordy as fuck space under the cut. (Edit: It won’t format correctly so ALL this bullshit under the cut. Thanks tumblr. SMD plz). Unfortunately I can't describe the way they talk without deconstructing a little bit on how I view each of their personalities because a part of me insists it's better to provide context and examples, so again, I'm sorry for these unnecessarily long ramblings. Skip to about the center of each paragraph if you want to focus on speech pattern-specific things, eheheheh.

John's pretty difficult for me too because his vernacular slate isn't as colorful as everyone else's, but this is kind of what I've come to understand about him: His general reaction to everything is a mixture of chipper and blasé--going with the flow. He kind of became the “straight man” in HS to combat the way everyone else was reacting to the wild shit that eventually went down. At face value, the way he talks makes him come off as a simple dude -- what you see is what you get, which isn't necessarily true. He's honest about his feelings but at the same time it seems like he has difficulty processing and understanding them, which makes them come through much milder than what you'd expect for the situation. It's probably why he absorbed his dad's death very slowly and got hit hard when it finally processed that he was gone for good. But not many things get all the way through his initial blaséness which actually makes him kind of callous in that he can give oddly indifferent responses to things others would consider a big deal, such as when Terezi died in front of him. He looked at her corpse and was just like "Eugh. She's so weird." Like damn dude, that’s cold. Ain’t like she bled to death or nothing. Anyway, some speech pattern specific things I keep in mind when I write him: He doesn't use a lot of big words, sticking to casual, simple responses, most of them positive or enthusiastic sounding. He sometimes uses old man speech and idioms, like Jake but toned down by like 85%. He's a bit slow on the uptake, points out the obvious, and says things that he thinks are clever but he's either completely missing the mark or being lame in general, not to say he can't sometimes be particularly sassy/savage, especially when it comes to his immediate friends because he knows them and can see through their bullshit better than he can with other people he doesn't know that well. In the chat client, he likes to divide combined words like "what ever" and "time line". If you're being canon compliant, he adopted some chat quirks from Vriska after they dated, such as multiplying punctuations by 8 for emphasis!!!!!!!! (edit: Ignore this last part. I think I may be thinking of a dead john, lmao.)

Jane's also a little difficult but easier than John since speech-wise, she's more of a balance between him and Jake + if they were super skeptical about everything and cared about being smart. She's actually kind of a wild card to me, because sometimes she has probably some of the most realistic reactions to the more ridiculous things in HS, but has grown used to equally ludicrous happenings such as the assassination attempts on her life in her intro. She also tends to wear her heart on her sleeve, and has quite the temper. She tries to override her more emotional responses with good southern manners because she's polite, god dammit! When her short fuse isn't ignited, her bottomless passion fuels her cheerfulness as well as her fearlessness. She's also pretty inquisitive, about the world around her as well as towards her friends, asking them questions to understand what they may be dealing with better. She tries really hard to be reasonable about things but struggles with letting other things that may be in play ruffle her well-kept feathers. Speech pattern-wise, she vacillates between speaking like a normal teen and a grandma, to a way lesser extent than Jake. Initially, she tries to keep it prim and proper--sophisticated like a southern suburban housewife with an interesting hint of embellished self-narrative like she's the protagonist of a Noir comic (like here), but when real shit starts to go down, she gets quite a bit more casual (like when they're on their quest slabs here). That is to say, I wouldn't say her normal way of talking is something that doesn't come naturally to her because it totally does, but she loses most of the laciness because short and to the point is better, which is the case for any of the kids with more flavorful quirks. She tends to steamroll over other people when she gets passionate about a topic, but when that's not happening, she's actually super accommodating, to the point of viciously ignoring her own feelings so she can be a voice of reason. In the chat client, she uses toothy emojis like :B.

Roxy, on the other hand, comes pretty easily for me because she's really similar to one of my closest friends and speaks much the same way we do when we're chill. We're also from the south, where much of the youth talk like Roxy does, lmao. Roxy is probably the most accommodating of any of the kids, readily bending over backwards to cater to her friends' needs and letting her own needs take a backseat, which probably leads to a lot of resentment she keeps buried. But she's still the chillest one, taking just about everything in stride before and after her alcoholism. She tends to get sad before she ever gets angry. And if she does get angry, it's usually only frustration at others for being difficult. Communication-wise, she's the most shorthanded--thinking and living in chat-speak. She's all about living her best life and taking care of her family so things are fun and peaceful. She wants to be super sure of herself (like Dirk) because she wants to be reliable. When talking, she likes to use a bunch of metaphors (again, like Dirk), and she tends to casually throw in a lot of puns too, such as when she tells Jake that they're still "humanated" when he asks if he's alienated her too. The nature of her responses is typically pretty flippant, even when things are serious. It's probably obvious that getting comfortable with general Ebonics will help a lot when writing her. In chat client, I try to remember these things: typos only happen when she's drunk--when typing her drunk, I avoid actively trying to give her slurred speech. Instead, I kind of let my fingers type a little more haphazardly and leave the typos I made that sound like mistakes she would make. She only tries to correct a small portion of her typos, more frequently the closer she is to sobriety. When she IS sober, her shorthand isn't consistent. One sentence she'll write "u" and the next, she'll write "you". Same thing with "2" and "to" or "4" and "for", etc. She'll cut out unnecessary letters in words, use typical chat abbrevs, and only use singular letters in place of a whole word, like "y" for "yes". Also uses smileys and other signs like <3. She's super fun for me to write because she comes away with a general feeling of "lmao" if that makes any sense.

Jake I'm always worried I'm doing wrong but he seems to be the one people love my characterization of the most so far, lmao. So I guess I must be doing something right. The thing about Jake is he wants to be the "likeable character". He takes what people want in a guy and molds that into this garbled persona. So when he talks to others, even his friends, he tries to be super agreeable, positive and supportive, regardless of the subject matter; he’s always talking these people up to make them feel good about themselves so that they enjoy conversing with him. But the reality is that he's extremely (but not necessarily intentionally) self-centered. He also aggressively ignores anything negative or forcefully turns it into something positive even when it doesn't make sense. He only tends to express frustration when others (Dirk) are being difficult; I don't remember if he ever actually gets angry in the comic?? He also likes to express surprise/amazement at things (a lot more than the other kids do at least), at the beginning of his responses, even when someone says something that's particularly obvious. The thing that gets me about Jake is that his superficial shell is so impenetrable, I don't think that issue was ever really fully addressed, much less fixed in HS, which leaves a lot of questions about his character & several different but valid interpretations of him by the audience. He may very well actually just be an oblivious idiot who's suffered brain damage one too many times (there's not too many pieces of supporting evidence to negate this) but I personally like to think Jake is far more complicated than that. I mean, look at how many convos he's grabbed the helm of and steered into a completely different direction just so he doesn't have to deal with something. His speech is probably the one I have to look up references for the most because he uses a fuckton of idioms you'd only hear one’s well-meaning but probably unintentionally racist poppop use, and a weird mixture of western/country and british vocab + bro speech he probably adopted while talking to Dirk. This is one list I find super useful when trying to find words to use (bless this person), but I still have to google a bunch of goofy phrases and words to be sure I'm not exhausting my material. One thing I know I do wrong when it comes to Jake's speech is use modern British slang such as "bloody" and "bloke", which is something he absolutely never does but I use them anyways because... idfc, I guess, idk. lol, I acknowledge it so it's fine.

Dirk is probably the one that comes easiest to me because he and I behave and talk pretty similarly. Either that, or I just like to think that and I'm just projecting while writing him completely wrong, lmao. Either way, Dirk hides behind the fact that he's super chill and levelheaded when really he's a nervous paranoid wreck. He's always thinking and overthinking about everything and he never gives himself a god damn break. He calculates every response he gives so it comes off exactly the way he wants it to, so when it doesn't because he's caught off guard, you get to see these little snippets of this dude freaking out underneath. He's a neurotic control freak that makes sure the flow of conversation stays on a set course he wants it to or else he gets either uncomfortable or pissed off. He skirts around anything that might get personal to him and dismisses any focus that sheds light on his own emotions UNLESS he feels, again, that he can control that flow of conversation. Or he's already emotionally compromised. Either way, he avoids conditions that might catch him actually being vulnerable because he's just too fuckin' proud. He likes to make a lot of comparisons, using extended metaphors and milking the fuck out of them if he can get away with it because the more he talks, the more he feels in control. He likes to smoothly play along with people he finds are being ridiculous, like Jake and Caliborn, or even just because he knows they'll know he's just playing along like Roxy. That's a key thing for me actually--how much he likes to fuck with people and how inelegantly he takes it in those rare cases someone successfully fucks with him. His speech seems to be a balance between Rose and Dave, a chill bro with access to the biggest vocabulary ever. I encourage aiming towards sounding like a pretentious asshole when writing Dirk because that's what he is all the time sometimes. He likes to Dirk-splain because more often than not he knows exactly what he's talking about, but he also doesn't realize his Dirk-splaining is something no one needed or asked for. Even though he's acknowledged and now resents the ludicrous size of his own ego, he still struggles with not stroking it at every opportunity. He’s a super capable, reliable guy and he knows it, but the reality is that much of what he plans for doesn’t work out. It’s only when he and his friends are really in the shit and he doesn’t have time to think that instinct takes over and he ends up doing some hella amazing things (Unite: Synchronization). That’s why his whole thought process of being better off alone is dangerous--he’s capable because he has people he loves relying on him. (I went off on a tangent unrelated to speech here. I’m sorry. I got a lot of feelings about Dirk and his selfishness vs. his selflessness, lol)

With all that, these are some general notes I try to abide by:

The ramblers of the kids are Dirk, Dave, and Jake, the former two especially when they're anxious. Dave's definitely the worst in that regard. The Striders both act like they wanna come off as men of few words and both fail miserably; it seems like being forced to live in verbal silence for a good portion of their lives gave both of these social wrecks a stigma against any gaps in conversation. Jake on the other hand rambles because he's self-important, not unlike Dirk. It's almost like he's not sure how else to contribute to the conversation if it's not about movies or himself.

For me, it actually helps that I think Dirk and Jake may both be on the spectrum. (I'm sorry if the following offends anyone who is on the spectrum, but this is just my general experience talking to people with those conditions). It certainly explains why their joint communication is so shit and why they either both give long-winded explanations that no one really asks for, or extract themselves from conversations they don't have a good foothold in, the latter being way more common for Jake (I hint a little at all this in my fic, moreso for Jake via Dirk's observations). They both want to be heard but may have difficulty being good listeners because their heads are already filled to the brim with things that have been cycling since before the other person has started talking.

On a final note, I find it pretty important to note the changes in each character's demeanor and way of talking after certain things happen. A glaring example is the Alpha Kids' behaviors after the batshit candy juju episode they all had. When Jake's broken out of his glorified, overwhelmingly positive fake self-image, he's actually very self-critical. However, his self-centeredness is hard to break out of, so when he broods on all the flaws he'd ignored in favor of being the guy everyone likes, he directed all of his nervous energy into finding reassurance from Roxy. (This self-deprecation could've also been born from his constant need to be agreeable, so since he thought everyone considered him to be a piece of shit, he felt the need to agree that was the case. Depends on how you read it.) Roxy had a shorter fuse and was a bit more snappy and resistant to dealing with Jake's ridiculousness. Jane remained calm and acknowledged she can be a bit too stubborn and self-righteous. Dirk finally took a step back from the details and absorbed the big picture of his problematic expectations toward his friends and himself. It’s just something to keep in mind if you fear you’re getting kind of OOC with their personalities. It’s natural for people to behave different based on changes in their mood, so don’t be afraid to experiment.

All that being said (I lied about that final note), I go back and reference the comic a lot when I’m unsure whether I’m representing a character accurately. It’s a good habit to double-check yourself. If you’re unsure how you’re writing a response but wanna move on, write it the best you can and then come back to it later and revise after reading a few conversations that include that character.

Most importantly of all: the thesaurus is your fucking best friend of all time. Fuck everyone else. The thesaurus is your god damn hero. I find “define:”ing words on google actually super helpful when trying to find synonyms that work better for me.

But that’s it! I hope you found at least a few things helpful in that word splurge of fumbling analyses. And thanks a bunch for reading my fic! It’s not super popular so it’s reassuring to know there are people out there who really enjoy it. Keeps me trying to update regularly at the very least.

[psychefm]

talk to the hand [ booboo stewart ], [ deon damgaard ] is the new kid on the block around here. at [ twenty one ], the [ demi boy ] works at [ chuck e cheese ] in the mall and, like, [ he ] totally reminds us of [ travis birkenstock ]. oh snap! what? their favorite movie is [ addams family values ]???? so is mine! (pepper, she/her, twenty three, est )

ABOUT THE MUN. hey demons, it’s ya gurl pepper

tumblr still hates me, and yk what i hate it right back. 

BIO. i need a himbo! i’m holding out for a himbo at the end of the night! he’s gotta be strong, and he’s gotta be fast, and he’s gotta be dumb and polite! suicide tw, depression tw, death tw !!!

Deon Damgaard was born from a tryst of passion. In other words, an affair. A very exciting affair, if that makes things any better. Said affair was between his mother, a talented young pianist, and his father, an influential, very much married businessman. You see, his father saw his mother play once and instantly fell in love. He came to every single one of his mother’s performances after that, and every time he did he left her flowers. Extravagant, beautiful flowers, the kind of flowers that make an impact on a woman, apparently. And they must have, because before long Deon’s mother was falling just as in love with Deon’s father as he was with her. And obviously you know what happens next. Deon.

Now, the thing about passionate love affairs is that they’re love affairs for a reason. There’s the love part of course. But there’s also the affair part. And that’s where things get complicated. Because despite being utterly, and completely in love with Deon’s mother, his father was still married. And he had no intention of ending his marriage, even for love.

But Deon’s mother didn’t know that at first. You see, Deon has inherited his mother’s easy optimism. The woman was in love and she believed with absolute surety that the love of her life would ultimately choose her. And so she waited for that day. And waited. And waited.

She spent most of the first few years of Deon’s life waiting, but the longer she waited the less Deon’s father even bothered to come around. The thing with falling in love hard and fast is that you can fall out of love just as quickly. And that’s exactly what Deon’s father did. He fell out of love like it was nothing.

So there was Deon’s mother, with a baby she shared with a man who didn’t love her anymore. One that carried his last name against his wishes, one that even had the name that he’d said he’d always wanted to give a son. One that she loved, truly. But that love wasn’t enough. Because Deon’s mother was in pain. More pain than a little baby like Deon could understand. Enough pain to end her own life.

Deon was six at the time. Not old enough to know what was happening, but old enough to understand that something was wrong. Especially when he quickly found himself in an orphanage. His father never claimed him of course. Deon doesn’t even know if he mourned his mother. Or if he wanted to come to her funeral. All he knows is that he wasn’t there.

There’s not much to be said after that, or at least nothing as poetic as the beginning. Deon was put into the foster system and he was never really wanted again. Well. Maybe that’s not completely true. The truth is no one ever wanted to adopt him. But he always hoped someone would. He’d be passed from family to family to family, bright eyed and hoping like the optimistic child he was. But they never wanted him. Some said he was too hyper. Others said he was too curious. More than a few just said he was too odd, and Deon always found that strange. That he was too odd to keep. Too odd to love.

Of course most of them didn’t expect Deon to be eavesdropping when they said these things so Deon couldn’t really fault them. They didn’t mean to hurt him. And so he could never truly hate them. He couldn’t find it in his heart to. But it was painful, to get his hopes up each time only to have them dashed away. Whether that be by being tossed aside like nothing but a nuisance or tossed around like nothing but a rag doll. It always hurt to seek love and give love and yet never get any in return. 

Deon moved to Strawberry, Nebraska at thirteen to be fostered by a cold, gruff couple who didn’t really have much of an interest in him other than the checks he provided. It took a while for Deon to realize that and even longer for him to accept it, and honestly some part of him still hasn’t. Even to this day Deon will try with them, just optimistically hoping that this one extra act of kindness, or one extra attempt at bonding will be the one to break the camels back and make them like him. It never is though. But at the very least Jack and Barb Finchum never got rid of him. They kept him around for the money, and due to this Deon got to stick around Strawberry. Strawberry is the place he’s been the longest in his entire life. 

And after Deon realized that he might be around for good he started trying harder than ever to make friends. Prior to Strawberry Deon had never really made many, and honestly he  tried to see it as a blessing. I mean, could you imagine having to leave not only your family but also friends time after time? It would be too much to bear. So Deon did his best to see it as a good thing. But now that he had the opportunity Deon was trying harder than ever to find his people. Maybe a bit too hard. Honestly Deon was probably known throughout town for being the weird loud kid, and he was pretty okay with that. I mean, he didn’t know it but he would be okay with it if he did. 

Was the guy you’d see at every house party, the guy who would make an elaborate plan to skateboard down the stairwell railing of the school on a dare, who would do your big chemistry project for nothing but a couple of joints and a taco, because that’s another thing, despite being a complete idiot Deon is also somehow a genius. Like he’s stupid, but he’s good at school, mostly because Deon quickly learned that everything in life had a price: food, toys, family, but school? School was free, and he adored it. Okay, maybe not all of it. English and foreign languages and god, history, all of that was painfully boring even if Deon could pass. But science? Science was the one thing that he had to look forward to throughout most of his childhood. And it continued to be that one thing into his young adulthood.

The majority of Deon’s said young adulthood was also spent sporadically behind bars. Let’s just say Deon fell into the wrong crowd. It wasn’t on purpose, Deon has just and likely always will be the kind of person who is eager for friendship. All these kids had to do was be even slightly nice to him and ‘sure, man! i can totally hotwire that car for you!’. That’s not to say Deon was completely innocent himself. Most of his arrests for theft, graffiti, and street racing, were products of his own doing. But sometimes, Deon just happened to be the guy abandoned at the scene of the crime. He never gave up his friends, no matter what the cops threatened him with, but he unfortunately never had the privilege of having his loyalty returned.

Deon stayed out of juvie by the skin of his teeth. It was mostly due to the fact that strawberry wasn’t a particularly big town, and Deon could usually endear the small town sheriff to him with his incessant chatter, and well meaning demeanor. He honestly made friends with more than a few of the cops that had arrested him, and there are more than a few that Deon would still call up today and chat with. He is probably in mall jail all the time for little things honestly. Sorry Peter. 

Despite his dabbling in crime, Deon graduated from high school with an almost spotless GPA and partial to full scholarships to more than a few universities including Harvard, MIT, Yale. Deon was kind of startled by all of the offers, but he did have more than a few projects during his years of schooling that caught the universities attention (including making the car from back to the future for fun but also making it so that it could possibly run on electricity, making a small robot that could run on used vegetable oil, etc). But with all the offers, Deon decided to stay local, because I would like to think that he finally made friends here and he could never just leave them now that he did. 

I feel like Deon has been working at Chuck E Cheese since he was maybe fourteen? And he loves it, he has the time of his life every shift. Likes to go around and play with the kids, can generally be depended on to fix the animatronics when they’re acting up, honestly probably started working there because he kept fucking with the animatronics for fun in his spare time and realized he could actually fix them too. that said, he still likes to reprogram chuckie himself to like do the worm or something. he has a great time with it, and i am so sorry kath.

okay that’s it i think 

HEADCANNONS. if i get shot do i own the bullet? like can i keep it?

this is deon.

fun fact, i originally made deon as an npc in a house party para i was doing with my friend sdkjsdjk he was genuinely made to be as annoying as possible but then my friend actually really liked him so now he’s a whole ass muse. that said if he is annoying… it’s because he was legit designed to be i’m sorry folks sdkjdskj fingers crossed he’s not though! but grating traits he has: never stops talking man, says man, dude, bruh, and bro, constantly. CONSTANTLY. you’ll be having a conversation with him and he’ll just blurt out something completely off topic??? HE’S SO LOUD TOO! And incredibly inappropriate god

that said deon was also inspired by jason mendoza and i literally teared up writing that because i’m still not over the end of the good place so dkjsdkj let’s move on!

loves back to the future and honestly i should have put back to the future as his favourite movie but i really didn’t remember it existed until now. 

has a septum piercing, a tongue piercing, a smiley piercing, a nipple piercing on his left nipple and several tattoos, most of which he’s done himself after buying a tattoo gun (honestly you shouldn’t let deon tattoo you because he just does whatever comes to him at the time but also LET DEON TATTOO YOU!). honestly has more than a few earrings too like both ears are probably full of piercings and he’s very proud of all of his them honestly.

loves colour and neon especially, but also loves to wear a lot of black like he’s a whole ass mess. his favourite colour is yellow btw. generally just wears what he likes, but he pretty much never looks polished.

his favourite number is 0!

wears a lot of rings and jewelry as well, you will rarely find your boy without something on his fingers.

has a rat named titty boy that he calls titty for short. his name is titty boy because he only eats hot cheetos and likes to watch garbage tv. as sad as it sounds he was one of deon’s first genuine friends so he loves him like BIG. takes him everywhere like he usually has him in his bag at work, so you can catch titty scurrying around chuck e cheese sometimes.

built a little  bot and named him douche bag, or rather deebs for short. also loves him big. deebs is constantly getting updated by deon honestly, but your boy actually probably won a prize when he made him because he’s actually?? very like advanced for what he is (he runs on used oil from fast food chains, has a touch screen, etc). deon literally made him so that he could help him remember to take his pills (deon has clinical depression and adhd, so he needs deebs around to give him that nudge sometimes), and he can do that and more now. deon kind of wants to see if he can break him into the service animal industry, cause he figures he could be good for people who need service animals but have allergies to fur.

gets around, mostly because he is attracted like everybody and feels no qualms about telling them that? and omg he’s also bi btw, no one is surprised. but honestly isn’t really a player just cause he’s too dumb to be one man. like if he was suppose to call you and he didn’t he literally just forgot sdkjsdkj

does not talk about himself at all! ever! like legit learning anything about deon’s past is like pulling teeth!

like i said deon has depression, but like most people probably don’t know that because again,, your boy is close lipped. that said he doesn’t try to hide it, like if you see him taking his pills you see him taking his pills. there are times though that deon will just not be found for a week or two when his depression gets bad. he usually emerges from these occasions chill and chipper as he usually is with sdkmds absolutely no mention of it. i don’t know if he has any friends he’s close enough to that he’d talk to about that though you know, like honestly from deon’s perspective *deon vc* i don’t wanna bring anybody down, man…

says man and bro and bruh and dude WAY TOO MUCH like they punctuate most of his sentences sdkdjs

surfer dude energy. skater dude energy. stoner dude energy.

smokes A LOT of weed. LOVES to party! that guy you see at every house party and have to wonder like??? how is he passing ANY of his classes sdkjsdj how is he SURVIVING

honestly when i usually write deon he’s an MIT graduate so dskjds he definitely got an offer from there that he casually responded to like ‘oh shit, thanks man, but i’m cool!’ sdkjdsjk 

sometimes you can catch deon sitting in his car blasting mariah carey and crying in the mall parking lot.

knows all the words to TLC’s waterfalls and will sing it to completion whenever it’s on.

will come to your flat and like fix your heater if it’s acting up. literally just hail deon down if you need anything fixed and he will do it for literally nothing. he just likes to help, and to be wanted around tbh rip

swears A TON omg i almost forgot deon swears constantly dkjds he doesn’t see a problem with it honestly, and he’s never like angrily swearing honestly it’s usually excited swearing but sdkjsdkj he’s a potty mouth nonetheless and if your muse doesn’t swear deon will pay them money to do it despite being BROKE. “will you say fuck for a dollar?” sdkjdsj 

PERSONALITY. do u are have stupid? hell yeah brother!

honestly one of my most kindhearted muses. like deon wouldn’t hurt a FLY! he catches spiders in his hands and takes them outside sdkjsdk. like even if you’re a dick to deon he will still be nice to you! never gets mad at ANYBODY, like it’s so rare to see deon pissed man he has the heart of a surfer dude

just freaking says things man. doesn’t think before he says anything ever. no brain to mouth filter at ALL.

that said he’s a lot smarter than he looks and acts skjdsj but he’s also so so stupid, it’s a bit contradictory honestly because deon is a DUMBASS! but he be knowing things man i can’t explain it. like he has no brain to mouth filter but like if you tell deon a secret no one is ever going to know.

PAINFULLY loyal to his friends like to a fault! even if you betray deon or abandon him he legit will not do the same to you, like if you were ever his friend you will be his friend until the day he dies.

generous. would give the shirt off his back to someone if they needed it

humble? like deon knows he’s good at what he does because people keep telling him that but he doesn’t do it because he’s good at it he does it because he thinks it’s fun and like rewarding, like seeing deebs beeping around just makes him happy.

doesn’t have a competitive bone in his body when it comes to academic success or professional success but when it comes to pacman or tWISTER and suddenly nothing else matters in the world

lowkey still desperately wants friends and to be accepted, and cares a lot more about what people think of him than he lets on, rip

you absolutely could manipulate deon whenever you wanted to, he would skdjdsjk probably never catch on man. it’s like ‘fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, come on man… fool me THREE TIMES?? bro.’ dkjdskj

lowkey sad sometimes because it be like that, but he will hide it the minute there’s someone around him.

one of those muses that is like… are you pretending to be dumb or are you really that dumb? and like legit i don’t even know the answer man and i’ve never actually got to play him long enough to find out so i’m hype for that!

WANTED CONNECTIONS. *tries to crowd surf at a ted talk*

BROS. give deon some a group of close guy friends he will adore them with everything in him!

SOMEONE THAT’S ANNOYED BY HIM. whether you’re trying to go home after your shift and deon is talking your ear off about the toe he found in his subway sandwich, or you have to hear him playing cotton eyed joe over the mall’s speakers (cause deon would do that,,,, i am so sorry peter blooth mall cop) you have a right to be annoyed by him. you are valid.

CONFIDANTE. despite the amount deon likes to talk he’s actually a really good listener and will keep all your secrets forever! so confide in him man, he’s got you. or the other way around someone deon feels like he can confide in and talk to?? a concept.

EXES. give me someone who broke his heart! i’ve never gotten to play brokenhearted deon but it would be fun. or someone who’s heart he accidentally broke, honestly he wouldn’t know it until it was too late sdkjsdkj.

CRUSH. give me someone who has a crush on deon that he is completely oblivious to. give me someone who deon has a crush on that he doesn’t know what to do with! honestly for the most part deon is either very blunt and forward or awkward and dumb with a crush, but either way it will be entertaining for all involved.

DAD FRIEND/MOM FRIEND. deon is a whole mess honestly, and he just needs someone who will make sure he doesn’t die you know? because he’s used to taking care of himself generally but he really will get himself into dangerous situation because he’s just stupid. some random stranger offers deon crack at a music festival? deon will take it! it’s so nice that they offered him some! *deon vc* yoooo, thanks man!

ENEMY. i just find it funny that deon wouldn’t know they are enemies. he’d wave to them and say hi and they’d be like I HATE YOU and he’d laugh like it’s a joke dkjdsk it’d be very one sided but very entertaining.

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS. deon has traveled all around america so give this to me friends! they were buds for maybe a bit before he moved or something like?? i want it. 

FWB. just really chill buds who also have sex. deon will try to high five them after sdkjdsjk maybe someone involved is catching feelings or maybe they’re just going to always be friends who have seen each other naked, and you know what that’s okay too.

alright that’s all i’ve got for now and yk how it is, please smash that like button if you’d like to plot and i’ll come running. 

[deonisms]

━━ ( booboo stewart + cis male + twenty one ) oi , have you seen deon damgaard around he lives in flat 14 in bedroom 2 ? i was meant to meet them this morning at bean me up before our lecture but he didn’t show . no ? well , shit . if you do see them , can you tell them i’m looking for them ? they’re a 3rd year robotics engineering student from gainesville, florida & you’ll know it’s them because they might just remind you of the faint smell of something burning, the restless clicking of a tongue piercing against teeth, boisterous laughter muffled by thin walls, dark circles combined with blindly bright grins, the warmth of overheating machinery . just be careful, he can be a little tactless, gullible & mercurial sometimes . —- oh don’t look like that , they’re usually eccentric, innovative & intuitive most of the time . ✏ pepper , twenty three, she/her, est

ABOUT THE MUN. hey demons, it’s ya gurl pepper

djkdsjk hello it is me again,,, simply out here being a slave to my own inspiration. honestly, i love ismael but i was torn between him, theo, and deon before apply for this rp and i am just feeling deon a bit more atm. i might still bring ismael in later as my third muse but for now it’s going to be all chaotic energy with one mr. deon! but omg okay a bit about me, i love the bachelor/bachelorette so hit me up if you want to mourn the death of pilot pete’s last braincell. i have a yorkie who literally runs my household as she should. i am honestly a hoe for a good aesthetic, like pinterest runs my ass. and i love sparkling water, which is controversial i know but perrier? god. fuck me up.

BIO. i need a himbo! i’m holding out for a himbo at the end of the night! he’s gotta be strong, and he’s gotta be fast, and he’s gotta be dumb and polite! suicide tw, depression tw, death tw !!!

Deon Damgaard was born from a tryst of passion. In other words, an affair. A very exciting affair, if that makes things any better. Said affair was between his mother, a talented young pianist, and his father, an influential, very much married businessman. You see, his father saw his mother play once and instantly fell in love. He came to every single one of his mother’s performances after that, and every time he did he left her flowers. Extravagant, beautiful flowers, the kind of flowers that make an impact on a woman, apparently. And they must have, because before long Deon’s mother was falling just as in love with Deon’s father as he was with her. And obviously you know what happens next. Deon.

Now, the thing about passionate love affairs is that they’re love affairs for a reason. There’s the love part of course. But there’s also the affair part. And that’s where things get complicated. Because despite being utterly, and completely in love with Deon’s mother, his father was still married. And he had no intention of ending his marriage, even for love.

But Deon’s mother didn’t know that at first. You see, Deon has inherited his mother’s easy optimism. The woman was in love and she believed with absolute surety that the love of her life would ultimately choose her. And so she waited for that day. And waited. And waited.

She spent most of the first few years of Deon’s life waiting, but the longer she waited the less Deon’s father even bothered to come around. The thing with falling in love hard and fast is that you can fall out of love just as quickly. And that’s exactly what Deon’s father did. He fell out of love like it was nothing.

So there was Deon’s mother, with a baby she shared with a man who didn’t love her anymore. One that carried his last name against his wishes, one that even had the name that he’d said he’d always wanted to give a son. One that she loved, truly. But that love wasn’t enough. Because Deon’s mother was in pain. More pain than a little baby like Deon could understand. Enough pain to end her own life.

Deon was six at the time. Not old enough to know what the big deal was, but old enough to understand that something was wrong. Especially when he  quickly found himself in an orphanage. His father never claimed him of course. Deon doesn’t even know if he mourned his mother. Or if he wanted to come to her funeral. All he knows is that he wasn’t there.

There’s not much to be said after that, or at least nothing as poetic as the beginning. Deon was put into the foster system and he was never really wanted again. Well. Maybe that’s not completely true. The truth is no one ever wanted to adopt him. But he always hoped someone would. He’d be passed from family to family to family, bright eyed and hoping like the optimistic child he was. But they never wanted him. Some said he was too hyper. Others said he was too curious. More than a few just said he was too odd, and Deon always found that strange. That he was too odd to keep. Too odd to love.

Of course most of them didn’t expect Deon to be eavesdropping when they said these things so Deon couldn’t really fault them. They didn’t mean to hurt him. And so she could never truly hate them. He couldn’t find it in his heart to. But it was painful, to get his hopes up each time only to have them dashed away. Whether that be by being tossed aside like nothing but a nuisance or tossed around like nothing but a rag doll. It always hurt to seek love and give love and yet never get any in return.

The bright side in Deon’s eyes was that at least he never made any friends. Because could you imagine how hard that would be? To pack your bags and have to say goodbye to your family and friends every time? It’d be too much to bear. So Deon counted his blessings. There weren’t many but he cherished the ones he had.

One of which was school. Deon didn’t have much at all, but at the very least he had school. Because everything had a price. Toys. Food. Even families (Deon wasn’t completely ignorant to the fact that his families got paid just to take care of him. For a lot of them that was the only reason they kept him around in the first place.) but school? School was free, and he adored it. Okay, maybe not all of it. English and foreign languages and god, history, all of that was painfully boring. But science? Science was the one thing that he had to look forward to throughout most of his childhood. And it continued to be that one thing into his young adulthood.

The majority of Deon’s said young adulthood was spent sporadically behind bars. Let’s just say Deon fell into the wrong crowd. It wasn’t on purpose, Deon has just and likely always will be the kind of person who is eager for friendship. All these kids had to do was be even slightly nice to him and ‘sure, man! i can totally hotwire that car for you!’. That’s not to say Deon was completely innocent himself. Most of his arrests for theft, graffiti, and street racing, were products of his own doing. But sometimes, Deon just happened to be the guy abandoned at the scene of the crime. He never gave up his friends, no matter what the cops threatened him with, but he unfortunately never had the privilege of having his loyalty returned.

Deon stayed out of juvie by the skin of his teeth. It was mostly due to the fact that he lived in a lot of different small towns for majority of his adolescence. Deon could usually endear the small town sheriffs to him with his incessant chatter, and well meaning demeanor. He honestly made friends with more than a few of the cops that had arrested him, and there are more than a few that Deon would still call up today and chat with.

Despite his dabbling in crime, Deon graduated from high school with an almost spotless GPA and partial scholarships to more than a few universities including Harvard, MIT, Yale. Deon was kind of startled by all of the offers, but he did have more than a few projects during his years of schooling that caught the universities attention (including making a car that ran on used vegetable oil, a charger that could charge your phone to completion in less than a minute, etc). But with all the offers, Deon picked Larnswick. Why? Well, mostly because he’d never been on a plane but also because he picked his university by playing eenie meenie miney mo dkdskj

Deon showed up to flat 14 with one pretty light suitcase, a rat in his hand, and a beaming grin despite being in a new strange country. He’s here on a full scholarship, but doesn’t really have any money of his own so he works a lot of jobs, or rather he gets fired from a lot of jobs. Every month or so you can see Deon in a new uniform for a new establishment, and every once in a while Deon will tell you the wild story of how he got fired from said establishment. Honestly he could really do well in a job as a handyman, but jsdkj he hasn’t thought of that yet. 

HEADCANNONS. if i get shot do i own the bullet? like can i keep it?

fun fact, i originally made deon as an npc in a house party para i was doing with my friend sdkjsdjk he was genuinely made to be as annoying as possible but then my friend actually really liked him so now he’s a whole ass muse. that said if he is annoying... it’s because he was legit designed to be i’m sorry folks sdkjdskj fingers crossed he’s not though! but grating traits he has: never stops talking man, says man, dude, bruh, and bro, constantly. CONSTANTLY. you’ll be having a conversation with him and he’ll just blurt out something completely off topic??? HE’S SO LOUD TOO! And incredibly inappropriate god

that said deon was also inspired by jason mendoza and i literally teared up writing that because i’m pmsing so sdkjsdkj let’s move on!

has a septum piercing, a tongue piercing, a smiley piercing, a nipple piercing on his left nipple and several tattoos, most of which he’s done himself after buying a tattoo gun (honestly you shouldn’t let deon tattoo you because he just does whatever comes to him at the time but also LET DEON TATTOO YOU!). honestly probably has more than a few earrings too, and he’s very proud of all of his piercings honestly. 

loves colour and neon especially, but also loves to wear a lot of black like he’s a whole ass mess. his favourite colour is yellow btw. generally just wears what he likes, but he pretty much never looks polished. 

his favourite number is 0!

wears a lot of rings and jewelry as well, you will rarely find your boy without something on his fingers.

has a rat named titty boy that he calls titty for short. his name is titty boy because he only eats hot cheetos and likes to watch the real house wives. as sad as it sounds he was one of deon’s first genuine friends so he loves him like BIG. takes him everywhere like he usually has him in his bag at lectures. titty can be found scurrying around the flat having the time of his life at any given moment that deon is in there.

built a little helper bot and named him douche bag, or rather deebs for short. also loves him big. deebs is constantly getting updated by deon honestly, but your boy actually probably won a prize when he made him because he’s actually?? very like advanced for what he is (he runs on used oil from fast food chains, has a near nonexistent carbon footprint, facial recognition, etc). deon literally made him so that he could help him remember to take his pills (deon has clinical depression and adhd unfortunately, so he needs deebs around to give him that nudge), and he can do that and more now. deon kind of wants to see if he can break him into the service animal industry, cause he figures he could be good for people who need service animals but have allergies to fur.

gets around, mostly because he is attracted like everybody and feels no qualms about telling them that? and omg he’s another muse of mine that’s bi btw, no one is surprised. but honestly isn’t really a player just cause he’s too dumb to be one man. like if he was suppose to call you and he didn’t he literally just forgot sdkjsdkj

does not talk about himself at all! ever! like legit learning anything about deon’s past is like pulling teeth! 

like i said deon has depression, but like most people probably don’t know that because again,, your boy is close lipped. that said he doesn’t try to hide it, like if you see him taking his pills you see him taking his pills. there are times though that deon will just not be found for a week or two when his depression gets bad and usually at those times his door will be locked and will not open for the entirety of that week like MAYBE at night when everyone is asleep so he can pee but that’s it! he usually emerges from these occasions chill and chipper as he usually is with sdkmds absolutely no mention of it. i don’t know if he has any friends he’s close enough to that he’d talk to about that though you know, like honestly from deon’s perspective *deon vc* i don’t wanna bring anybody down, man...

says man and bro and bruh and dude WAY TOO MUCH like they punctuate most of his sentences sdkdjs

surfer dude energy. skater dude energy. stoner dude energy.

smokes A LOT of weed. LOVES to party! that guy you see at every house party and have to wonder like??? how is he passing ANY of his classes sdkjsdj

honestly when i usually write deon he’s an MIT graduate so dskjds he definitely got an offer from there that he casually responded to like ‘oh shit, thanks man, but i’m cool!’ sdkjdsjk also probably has gotten more than a few offers to work at like google but refuses to work there until every image that shows up for the search ‘donald trump’ is just the angry orange. it’s his own negotiating point and he refuses to budge on it.

sometimes you can catch deon sitting in his car blasting sara barailles and crying in the university parking lot.

and finally, in ode to ismael,,, deon has a crush on claire from the bon appetit test kitchen. like he wants to marry her. his twitter is just nonsense stream of consciousness stuff and then occasionally ‘@clairesaffitz MARRY ME CLAIRE’. people have probably tried to point out to him that claire doesn’t have a twitter but deon always forgets djhddfjk

knows all the words to TLC’s waterfalls and will sing it to completion whenever it’s on.

will come to your flat and like fix your heater if it’s acting up. literally just hail deon down if you need anything fixed and he will do it for literally nothing. he just likes to help, and to be wanted around tbh rip

swears A TON omg i almost forgot deon swears constantly dkjds he doesn’t see a problem with it honestly, and he’s never like angrily swearing honestly it’s usually excited swearing but sdkjsdkj he’s a potty mouth nonetheless and if your muse doesn’t swear deon will pay them money to do it despite being BROKE. “will you say fuck for a dollar?” sdkjdsj despite the fact that he’s in england rip. 

PERSONALITY. do u are have stupid? hell yeah brother!

honestly one of my most kindhearted muses. like deon wouldn’t hurt a FLY! he catches spiders in his hands and takes them outside sdkjsdk. like even if you’re a dick to deon he will still be nice to you! never gets mad at ANYBODY, like it’s so rare to see deon pissed man he has the heart of a surfer dude

just freaking says things man. doesn’t think before he says anything ever. no brain to mouth filter at ALL.

that said he’s a lot smarter than he looks and acts skjdsj but he’s also so stupid, it’s a bit contradictory honestly because deon is a DUMBASS! but he be knowing things man i can’t explain it. like he has no brain to mouth filter but like if you tell deon a secret no one is ever going to know. 

PAINFULLY loyal to his friends like to a fault! even if you betray deon or abandon him he legit will not do the same to you, like if you were ever his friend you will be his friend until the day he dies. 

generous. would give the shirt off his back to someone if they needed it

humble? like deon knows he’s good at what he does because people keep telling him that but he doesn’t do it because he’s good at it he does it because he thinks it’s fun and like rewarding, like seeing deebs beeping around just makes him happy.

doesn’t have a competitive bone in his body when it comes to academic success or professional success but when it comes to mario kart or ddr or tWISTERand suddenly nothing else matters in the world

lowkey still desperately wants friends and to be accepted, and cares a lot more about what people think of him than he lets on, rip

you absolutely could manipulate deon whenever you wanted to, he would skdjdsjk probably never catch on man. it’s like ‘fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, come on man... fool me THREE TIMES?? bro.’ dkjdskj

lowkey sad sometimes because it be like that, but he will hide it the minute there’s someone around him. 

one of those muses that is like... are you pretending to be dumb or are you really that dumb? and like legit i don’t even know the answer man and i’ve never actually got to play him long enough to find out so i’m hype for that!

WANTED CONNECTIONS. *tries to crowd surf at a ted talk*

BROS. give deon some a group of close guy friends he will adore them with everything in him!

A NEIGHBOR THAT’S ANNOYED BY HIM. whether you’re trying to get inside and deon is talking your ear off about the toe he found in his subway sandwich, or it’s just the damn loud music he’s always playing (if you hear cotton eyed joe at two am, it’s definitely deon) you have a right to be annoyed by him. you are valid. 

CONFIDANTE. despite the amount deon likes to talk he’s actually a really good listener and will keep all your secrets forever! so confide in him man, he’s got you. or the other way around someone deon feels like he can confide in and talk to?? a concept. 

EXES. give me someone who broke his heart! i’ve never gotten to play brokenhearted deon but it would be fun. or someone who’s heart he accidentally broke, honestly he wouldn’t know it until it was too late sdkjsdkj.

CRUSH. give me someone who has a crush on deon that he is completely oblivious to. give me someone who deon has a crush on that he doesn’t know what to do with! honestly for the most part deon is either very blunt and forward or awkward and dumb with a crush, but either way it will be entertaining for all involved. 

DAD FRIEND/MOM FRIEND. deon is a whole mess honestly, and he just needs someone who will make sure he doesn’t die you know? because he’s used to taking care of himself generally but he really will get himself into dangerous situation because he’s just stupid. some random stranger offers deon crack at a music festival? deon will take it! it’s so nice that they offered him some! *deon vc* yoooo, thanks man!

ENEMY. i just find it funny that deon wouldn’t know they are enemies. he’d wave to them and say hi and they’d be like I HATE YOU and he’d laugh like it’s a joke dkjdsk it’d be very one sided but very entertaining. 

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS. deon has traveled all around america so give this to me friends! could even be friends from high school or something or middle school, whatever it is i’m game. 

FWB. just really chill buds who also have sex. deon will try to high five them after sdkjdsjk maybe someone involved is catching feelings or maybe they’re just going to always be friends who have seen each other naked, and you know what that’s okay too. 

alright that’s all i’ve got for now friends, because i’ve been up since 7am and i am slowly losing steam sdkjs but we can always brainstorm! like this and i’ll slip and slide into your dms!