#god I yapped so much I am so sorry

[alpinelogy]

Fic Writer Interview

thank you for tagging me @13834. Hopefully the tag works <3

Under the cut cause I said so much help. This took like an hour?? Probably maybe even longer

How many works do you have on ao3? 16 posted as attraqtia + 6 posted on anon + 1 one I hid because I did not like it. And an extra one on my old AO3 but I'm discounting that one lmao. Also back in the day I posted on a further unspecified fanfic archive that is not AO3 (and is still around) as well as on Wattpad and ff.net but I've forgotten my username and login to all and I refuse to admit to those anyway so...

What’s your total word count? 238,447 words. Insane

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

ether strike (313 kudos)

galaxy collapse (somebody scream) (257 kudos)

home is only a town (you're just a guest) (224 kudos)

kicked out the stage lights (you’re still performing) (222 kudos)

system’s breaking down (there’s been a glitch) (214 kudos)+ because I find it funny, 6th place is shared between fill your drink with tonic gin (this is the american dream) and universum both at 187 kudos

Do you respond to comments? Why/why not? I try to (I say as if I have responded to a comment within the past several months) but I am not very good at it. Wish i could like a comment tbh, sometimes it is a idk what to say but your comment made me smile. Also I just get so much burnout I hate it here

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? Uh... probably fill your drink with tonic gin (this is the american dream). Don't really write angsty endings but this is open ended so o7

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? Heckies there are several possibilities. Ignoring pwp cause I almost exclusively write established relationship so that is technically happy;

galaxy collapse (somebody scream) is a romcom that ends in loscar happy in a relationship. Happiest ending I've written. That being said

we found wonderland (you and i got lost in it) has a less happy ending but it is significantly angstier so it has a bigger range of emotions. Same goes for kicked out the stage lights (you're still performing). Putting them together cause they both have the roughly same setup of lost contact in an angsty way

same goes for now entering a world (from which you will never return) aka timeloop. Not a super happy ending but the amount of angst makes it feel more happy I think

finally maybe we got lost (in translation) and home is only a town (you're just a guest) are both getting together fics and they end in a happy get together. So adding those as well. They are not romcoms since there is plenty of drama and angst in both

Do you write crossovers? Uh... no rules (in breakable heavens) aka cycling au is a crossover right? I took guys from media A (F1) and put them into the universe of media B (cycling). Granted they are both sports that exist in the same universe but I think this should count as a crossover to me

Have you ever received hate on a fic? Nope. Thank fucking god. In all my close to a decade of writing never and I hope it stays that way

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yeah. Mostly established relationship pwp so I am pleading to AO3 to please add tenderhorny as a tag, most of my smut involves some (mild) kinks but also the established relationship part is important!!

Only single thread of gold (tied me to you) has explicit smut and is not pwp lmao. And yeah... that also has domestic fluff as a tag so who tf knows

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Nope. Or at least no that I know of

Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope

Have you ever co-written a fic before? No... technically. Me and kiro have been floating an idea of co-writing a fic earlier this year but we never got around to it. Kiro come back from the war (US education system) I wanna co-write that fic 🥺

That being said I would love to cowrite a fic one day, it always sounds so fun!! Any writing mutuals (or non writing mutuals who even just need an emotional support writer or anything else o7) hmu I would love to co-write a fic <3

What's your all-time favourite ship? All time including previous fandoms? Bokuaka from Haikyuu!!

F1 only? Probably Piarles actually. Or Loscar or Lolex, been leaning a lot towards Lolex recently Honorary cycling mention: pogrog. The ideas people post and the few fics on AO3... Please these two intrigue me so much

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will? I am eternally scared I would never finish time travel George :(((. Really wanna write it, one of these days I will lock in I promise.

What I will never actually write? The original iteration of rbr!Oscar. Idk if I ever will write a version of it, I plotted the original version in August last year and my opinion of rbr has changed since then. I have replotted some of it few months bac but idk how I feel about rbr still lmao. But I am stealing a lot of the backstory for a Merc!Oscar AU so I suppose it works out :3c

Cycling AU also used to look very different. Tbh if anyones interested I'd love to yap about it, don't think it could ever work and it was the first thing I plotted but I have a soft spot for it :). Honestly I just really wanna talk about cycling AU, I have done so much worldbuilding for it and I adore it <3

More ideas from 2023 I will never finish: a Le Mans au for a further unspecified ship, several landoscar wips, several different takes on the pierresteban beef (one day I will write one. Just the ones I have rn will never make it out of the Google docs in their current state). Several different character studies of a driver I now hate so 😂😭

What are your writing strengths? Description I think. Being ESL and having a read a lot in English as a child means that my vocabulary is wide and messy and I am willing to stick three different words with the same meaning next to each other so lol and lmao

What are your writing weaknesses? Dialogue. Idk how to even talk with people irl, does anyone think I can wrote a dialogue of two people?

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? Idk I'm not a huge fan unless it is to make a point? Like if you speak the language then I suppose but idk, dont vibe with it

That being said non-English pet names when relevant (ie Piarles using pet names in French) is cute :)))

What was the first fandom you wrote for? Refuse to admit to it. Second one was Naruto asdfghj

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to? PIERRESTEBAN. Like my second wip ever after cycling au was pierresteban. I have always had at least one pierresteban wip. I never managed to write one that I actually liked but one of these days they will be free. Lets see if I can finish my Brazil fic (also known as azincourt so if that spawns o7) or not

Also gewis. I always forget I have not written them yet lmao, time travel George truly lives rent free in my head :)))

And one of these days I will write a proper cycling fic, not an a with the F1 guys. I just... have a weird relationship with cycling rpf on account of growing up with the sport, but I respect the work yall do and I do have the cycling rpf tag opened in a tab on my phone. One of these days I will process my thoughts on it and then write a pogrog fic o7

What's your favourite fic you've written? Heck idk. Top 3 5 in no particular order:

galaxy collapse (somebody scream) - not that good cause its close to a year old but I adore the premise, I adore the vibes, I adore her so much. She is so fun and chill I think I could've done a better job on her in hindsight so she does not get to be No1 but my beloved

now entering a world (from which you will never return) - timeloop!! Probably if I had to say just one it would be her, a labor of love, I think some bits of my thesis of the fic (trust the people around you, it is okay to rely on them at times) are clumsily executed within the actual text and in hindsight there might be bits I wanna retcon but I do adore her a lot

we found wonderland (you and i got lost in it) - my dearly beloved first proper long fic. I still regularly think about the galex in this AU. Like no joke I have made up a very cheesy and idealized and probably lowk ooc future for them that I shall not yap on here about (re: the ooc bit) but honestly, if anyone wants to know it I am willing to yap in DMs o7

kicked out the stage lights (you’re still performing) - so fun to write!! wrote across like three or four sessions, feels like a very condensed version of wonderland and yes. I may or may not have thought of what happens after as well

home is only a town (you're just a guest) - I adore soulmate AUs a lot!! It was on my bucket list to write some day and I'm so glad I finally wrote it!! I vibe with the premise so much and the world building my beloved, so many bits to explore in just Alex and Logan's upbringing (bottom line consider the fact that Charles and Alex would have a fundamentally different relationship cause Charles' soulmate is also named Alex!! Just marinate on that) + honorary mention of no rules (in breakable heavens). I was (and still am lowk) working through a burnout so she is sorta ass but its cycling au. I adore cycling au. I don't think I can put it into words how much the cycling au means to me, one of these days I will write drabbles about the other guys. Bottom line George and Alex in that AU intrigue me

Sorry for the long ass yap asdfgh. Tagging uh... @landoisokay @lafaerie @weegreenbean @autumn816 @femmegeorge @racingliners and @kiroiimye if you by any chance open Tumblr in the next few days >:) come on come back to writing

[theythemmer]

phinktober day 11: ur fav AU

i dont rlly do AUs so i just drew them how i wish they would dress xo

(dan’s tats r carnations and snowdrops and phil’s r roses and honeysuckle. for no reason 🤗)

ALSO bonus version w makeup bc i couldn’t pick <3

[choccy-milky]

tag nine people you want to get to know better!

ty for the tag @myokk and @theladyofshalott1989 !!💖💖

LAST SONG? - i deadass don't know💀i don't really listen to music i just always have streams/youtube vids on (I KNOW IM SORRY DONT @ ME) ....does the baroque noble party ambience i was listening to while working on my oneshot count??? shoutout to that video btw

FAVORITE COLOR? - yellow!!💛⭐

CURRENTLY WATCHING? - i also don't really watch shows💀....do 6 hour video essays on youtube count? in which case i love action button if you haven't watched his stuff (his boku no natsuyasumi video and his tokimeki memorial video are amazing, and his pacman video), and also super eyepatch wolf & hbomberguy (especially hbomb's 'pathologic is genius' video). also i listen to a podcast called '372 pages we'll never get back' that i highly recommend

LAST MOVIE? - 💀💀💀this is just a meme at this point💀💀💀I DONT EVEN REMEMBER....me and my roommate love watching crappy adam sandler movies so probably one of those??? or my neighbor totoro since i forced my niece to watch it 😍

SWEET/SPICY/SAVORY? - SAVORY BABY I LOVE SALT IM A SALT FIEND!!!🧂🧂🧂i put my grubby little hands straight into the olive jar and FEAST...also when i was in uni i used to keep a little ziploc bag of salt on me for when i ate out LMFAOOO and i always steal the salt shaker and bring it to my room and my roommate is always like DO YOU HAVE THE SALT AGAIN???......what can i say i love salt........(tho i still love sweets and spicy foods as well. and im addicted to coke zero btw. my body is comprised of 50% salt and 50% coke zero)

RELATIONSHIP STATUS? - almost 2 years in my poly relationship with seb and clora😍😍

CURRENT OBSESSIONS? - girl do u even have to ask........

LAST THING YOU GOOGLED? - probably timezones for when im talking to mutuals LMAOO...i just like to know what hour it is there no pressure tags: @the-ozzie @sparxyv @ccelicaa @kaviary-blog @siboom777 @boxdstars @versailles-black @limonnitsa @dwightschrute11 @ethniee @celestinawarlock @moonstruckmoony @syaolaurant @bassicallymaestra @lilac-ravenclaw @vienguinn @noelles-legacy @4ever2000lover @lamieboo @magic-in-onyx (NO PRESSURE FR FR I HATE TAGGING PPL BC I FEEL LIKE IM BOTHERING YALL BUT I ALSO DONT WANT TO LEAVE PPL OUT AT THE SAME TIME...SO IF YOURE READING THIS U CAN CONSIDER YOURSELF TAGGED AS WELL🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️OR CONSIDER YOURSELF UN-TAGGED IF YOU DONT WANNA DO IT BAHAHA)

[arthursfuckinghat]

The fate of Evelyn Miller is so fucking fascinating, I had no idea.

Although Dutch admired him like a saint, his books and writings were heavily criticized by others in the same field as him. Miller wrote very poetic and socially progressive novels (a big deal considering the time period), his empathy and understanding of the world around him was the main reason for the criticism.

He was painted as a fraud and a fool who had ideas far above his station, his books also sparked a lot of controversy in the gang. When Dutch tried sharing 'wisdom' from one of the books, Lenny was especially critical of Miller's philosophies. Lenny also said that Miller was a fraud, a man who came from a privileged life and was pretending to live like a lower class citizen. Dutch took it personally, but carried on reading, he does this in a few interactions with explaining or reading out some of Miller's writing to gang members.

But the interesting part is despite Dutch preaching Miller's philosophies and reading his books to the last letter, he proved to not fully understand the meaning behind the writings after all.

It was shown that Miller was an advocate for nature, the Wapiti, and native Americans in general. He tried to help them with the situation regarding the peace treaty and convinced Arthur to help them too. Miller's allyship with the Wapiti was met with a lot of scrutinization, he was insulted by guests at the mayor's party for sympathising with minorities, but Miller still aided them when they needed it.

And as we know, this is quite the opposite to what Dutch did. Dutch took advantage of the Wapiti and helped fuel the war between them and the army for his own gain. He preached his idea of a fair and free world, but killed innocents and indoctrinated the vulnerable. He preached second chances, but shot without hesitation. He preached loyalty, but left his sons to die.

I could go on, but ultimately, Miller was also critical of himself. He pushed himself hard to write and improve, so much so that he died of starvation whilst trying to finish his last book. His last request was wanting his body to be burned so he could soar in the air with the eagles.

Dutch loving and preaching Miller till his dying day only further cemented the hypocrisy that ran deep in Dutch as a person. He fed on the thrill that came from leading people to a 'better world' - and it killed them all.

[klutzytomb]

I never thought I'd say this, but there's no way I'm one of the only ones here that isn't chronically online. Right? Right??

[theusernameiwantisntavailable]

Persona 5/ Persona 5 royal spoilers ahead!

Okay so I did this WIP a while back that I discontinued but I'm still going insane about the meaning of it and also the symbolism of masks in this game and also akeshu parrallels so I need to Yap abt them

Yap session under the cut!

The symbolism of masks in this game drives my so batshit insane actually. Like. So often we see in media that people are finally free when they take their mask off (both metaphorically and literally) but in this game we see people's true forms when they put one ON.

Like the palaces are where we see people's true faces and desires. It's the place where no one can hide who they are. And yet it's one one place where you wear a physical mask and disguise and have to conceal who you are.

I could (and will at some point) write an entire essay about that but rn it's akeshu hours

Because Joker is arguably the best example of that, he becomes alive in the palaces, where his face his hidden. It's his freedom

Versus Akechi

The first time we see Akechi show his true form to Joker (and the player) is in what is percieved at the time as the real world. The entire time we work together in the palace, the place that shows who you are despite the mask you wear he hides who he is. It's only in the gritty real world that he reveals himself.

Joker in the real world is perceived (at least by people outside of his circle) as closed off and someone to be cautious around, he has a criminal record so he could be dangerous. The exact opposite of how he is in palaces, the centre of the team and a flame people are drawn towards

VERSUS AKECHI

In the real world he is a celebrity, he is loved, people are drawn to him. But in palaces he's cold and heartless, his words are cutting and he cares for no one, not hesitating to kill to achieve his goal

Opposites in every sense

THE ABSOLUTE PARALLELS IT DRIVES ME INSANEASHBANANSJAKSS

They were both ruined by the same man. They both ended up in their current predicament because of said man. They both had the potential to weild multiple personas. They both have the capability to lead. They are the exact same and yet the exact opposite

They don't need to lie awake at night and wonder what would they be like if their life had turned out slightly differently. They don't need to because they have each other. EVERYTIME THEY GO INTO A PALACE THEY SEE WHO THEY COULD'VE BEEN, THEY FIGHT WITH THAT PERSON SIDE BY SIDE EVERY NIGHT I'M GOING MAD

[seventh-district]

Could've left me just the way you found me, but you came and put your wings around me. You went out of your way, to fix what you didn't break.

This song is so incredibly Sam & Darlin' coded and no one can tell me otherwise.

[lots of lyrical analysis below the cut] [there's also a short little fanfic blurb of them stargazing down there too (this post got really out of hand lmao)]

For those not fully caught up, note that the following commentary contains various spoilers for Sam and Darlin's stories.

Note: Unfortunately this song is gendered, using the word 'girl' several times. Which sucks a little bit for immersion purposes, not only for keeping Darlin' gender-neutral, but also because I see this song as a duet between them, and Darlin' obviously wouldn't be addressing Sam with the word 'girl' either. So! As with most songs on their playlist, we're just gonna mentally omit any gendered terms we come across.

Side note: Frustratingly, this is one of those songs that didn't really even need to gender the subject in the first place. No part of the story or message is lost without it. But alas, many songs are like that, and so the playlist-makers of the world shall continue to suffer. [/lh]

Anyways, preamble's over. It's lyric time now yay!

Sam's Part

I was a ten-year train wreck

Technically for Sam I suppose it was 13 years, but ten is close enough (and 'ten' admittedly flows a lot better in the rhythm of the song than 'thirteen' would.) Anyways, we're not here to split hairs, (I have to remind myself), we're just here to point out similarities.

In Sam's Dec. '22 HBW, he says "For the last 13 years or so I haven't had to care too much about how I look. Seemed a little redundant after turnin', considerin' I didn't wanna be around much'a anybody anyway."

I think he's mentioned or alluded to that roughly 13 year period of time more than once, but that's the one I remember best so it's the example I'm using. There's still about 4 Sam audios I've yet to listen to as of making this post, so if I'm missing some Key Lore I'll edit this later. But for now, I don't think Sam has given many specifics on exactly how bad things got during that time. Luckily, 'train wreck' is a pretty broad and subjective term, so it easily covers any degree to which he may have fallen apart during those years.

It also feels like a very 'him' way of quickly brushing over the details of his past/his hurt, as he seems to tend to do with Darlin', (not all the time ofc but it's still something I've noticed) putting his own hurt on the backburner to prioritize and attend to theirs. Even outside of his dynamic with them, I think as a healer, it's something he learned to do. And now he does it with everyone. Put on a brave face, compartmentalize things and unpack them later, etc. I could go on and on but there'll be time for that in other posts I'm sure. For now, lets get back to the song at hand.

With a last-call longneck

Due to personal reasons, I've yet to decide if I want to HC him as having used alcohol as a coping mechanism during that time. I don't recall him having mentioned alcohol much, if at all, (maybe one mention of whiskey that I don't have time to find right now) so I don't think it's necessarily canon that he did, but it's certainly possible. My personal preferences aside, I'll admit it makes for some good additional angst. (And- self-indulgently- it makes some other songs on my playlist for them more fitting.) So, for the sake of this song, let's imagine that he did.

I was searchin', I'd been hurt real bad

This one feels pretty self-explanatory given what Alexis did, (and, if you wanna get even angstier with it, whatever his family did earlier on in his life) so there isn't much commentary to add on my end.

I HC that in spite of 'not wanting to be around anybody', he- like Darlin- still had a tiny part of himself buried deep down that was, in a way, 'searching' for someone to find solace in. (No this isn't me projecting onto them both haha what are you talking about-)

Movin' on, gettin' sidetracked One step forward and five back

This is generally applicable enough that I don't feel the need to give too much of a specific example. Anyone who's recovered or is recovering from trauma knows this non-linear, back-and-forth struggle well already, and I'm sure he was no stranger to it.

If I were to give some examples though, I could point to Darlin's (and subsequently, Sam's) encounter with Alexis at the summit, or the shit that Quinn dredged up about Fredrick and threw at Sam in the interrogation room. Those are both more recent examples and I imagine these lines of the song to be coming from a place of him prior to meeting Darlin', but still, they're some instances where I'm sure he felt like the past was pulling him back in. I'm sure that there's been many throughout those 13 years that we were never witness to.

Not your fault, I was scared to fall

This line reminds me of their 'Cuddles and Confessions' audio. I don't think he ever explicitly said he was 'scared' per se, so afaik there's no specific line I can quote, but in that and every audio prior, he was obviously hesitant to admit, perhaps even to himself, that he was gradually falling for them. Even after the initial confession, there's certain limits of his (e.g. biting) that he carries for far longer, and some that I (and others) HC that he'll carry forever. So this line feels to me like him reassuring Darlin' that his reluctance isn't the fault of them, but his past.

Darlin's Part

You were the star in the pitch black Shine the way on the way back

We don't have any canon instances of them comparing Sam to a star, but I can see it being something they'd say (perhaps less poetically, but the sentiment would be there) one night while laying up on their roof watching the stars with him. Maybe they're dead-tired, talking nonsense with lidded eyes at the end of a long day, fighting sleep in favor of more time spent with him.

"What- what're you pointin' at Darlin'?"

Their hazy focus is trained on the brightest star visible in their line of sight, arm stretched out to the sky above them. "That really bright one, to the... to the left."

Sam does his best to follow their less-than-specific directions of 'to the left', their pointed finger doing little to help given the difference in perspective. Luckily, after all these years, he knows this stretch of night sky like the back of his hand, so it isn't hard to locate the brightest one. Ghosting his fingers up along their arm, he takes their hand in his and brings it back down to earth. "Okay, yeah, I see it now. What about it though?"

"That's you." They say, matter-of-factly.

"That's me?" He questions, humor in his tone.

"Mhm." They nod with finality, blinking slow.

Sam considers the odd statement for a moment before gently correcting them. "I'm uh, I'm pretty sure that's Sirius, actually."

They scoff. "I am being serious."

Sam stifles a laugh into their hair. "No- no I mean- like... what's another name for it... Oh! It's also called the Dog Star."

"C'mon Sam, at least call it the Wolf Star if you're trying to turn this around on me..."

He shakes his head and readies himself to explain further, but they cut him off before he can start. "But no- no, this one isn't about me. That's you."

He decides to play along, finding something endearing in their overtired nonsense. "Okay... then would'ja be so kind as to explain to this confused old man just how, or why that star is me?"

Their frown is audible in their voice as they latch onto the wrong part of his sentence. "You're not old, Sam. ...Do I need to tell Asher to kick the jokes down a notch?"

He smiles at their over-protectivity. "There'll be no need for that, now. Was just a joke, darlin', I promise."

They huff, but thankfully shift focus back to the prior topic. "It's... I dunno. It's just you, Sam. It's... bright. Light. Something warm, out there in the cold dark. Standing out amongst all the rest. Calling to me, stealing my attention. I... I didn't come out here looking for it, but there it is. ...There you were. In the dark. The only bright thing I'd seen in... fuck, in years. Years of chasing fleeting warmth, tripping over myself in the pitch black, falling into... places 'n people I shouldn't have. You were the light in that darkness. Even there, surrounded by the ghost of him. You outshone it. Your warmth didn't hurt. I didn't have to squint when I looked at you. You weren't the blinding sun. You were the brightest star I'd ever seen. You guided me back home."

In the back of their mind, they recall something they once heard, something about light, and time, and distance. Space. Something about... how you can see a star that's already burnt out, because it's light hasn't reached earth yet. The ghost of a star that's already died. Only still perceptible thanks to time, and distance.

They remember Sam's words, once whispered to them on this very roof.

"Whatever your choice is... I'm not gonna live forever. I made that decision a long time ago."

They think about dead stars.

They think about time.

"...-lin'? Darlin'?" Sam's calloused hand slides up their forearm, pulling them out of their thoughts. "There you are. Think I lost ya' for a minute there... you good?"

They look up at Sam, concern creasing his features, shadows cast across his face from the light of the dying stars above him.

They reach out, pulling him down into them. Burying their face into his collar, Sam's concern grows when he feels it saturate with tears. A human might struggle to hear their words, muffled against the thick fabric, but his hearing catches it just fine.

"Don't burn out too quick. Please. I still need you here. I don't- I don't wanna be left in the dark again. Please, please Sam. Don't leave me here. I'm not selfish enough to ask you for forever, but please. Not yet. Not yet. Not yet."

.......Whoopsies! Really, genuinely didn't mean to improv an entire scene there, good god. Also didn't mean to swerve hard into angst at the end but uh. that's what came out! so I'm rolling with it lmao. Aaanyways let's move on, it's getting late and this is a song analysis post, not a fic.

Out of nowhere, answered all my prayers

'Out of nowhere' reminds me of Sam's words from the same HBW video I referenced earlier. "You came into my life like a damn wreckin' ball. There was no preparing for that, clothing or otherwise." While those were Sam's words, not Darlin's, I still feel like they feel similarly to how suddenly Sam came into their life as well. (Not in a bad way, mind you!)

[the significance of 'answered all my prayers' edges into my own personal more headcanon-y/personal/OC-ified Darlin' territory, so we can just gloss over this one for the sake of at least attempting to keep this more universally applicable]

Picked up the towel that I threw in Took in a heart that was ruined

Again, largely self-explanatory I feel. (*proceeds to explain anyways*) I imagine that Darlin' was at the point of throwing in the towel, hellbent on a solo-mission to find Quinn regardless of the danger it posed to them. I doubt they were looking toward the future anymore, (to reference Sam,) fully willing to throw themself at their problems until they really did break.

The specific use of 'ruined' hits hard here, because after everything they went through with Quinn, and especially after he recounted it all to Sam in that interrogation room, I imagine that they really, truly did feel ruined.

Showed me the past ain't a tattoo Loved me even when you didn't have to

These lines in particular make me sick with emotion every time I hear this song, because I feel like they hit the nail on the head for how Darlin' feels.

I'll be here citing various quotes all night that I feel showcase that sentiment, but we don't have time for that! So instead I'm just pointing to the entirety of 'Quinn's Aftermath' video, and leaving you with this single quote from it.

"Everything that he said reflects nothin' on you, and everything on him."

Equally Applicable Lines

And I don't know why Why you saw something in me, baby But you saw right through All the pain, and you came and saved me Yeah, I know you didn't leave me lonely Weren't the one that put the heartbreak on me Picked up the pieces It wasn't the mess that you made Could've left me just the way you found me But you came and put your wings around me You went out of your way To fix what you didn't break

Again, I think these lines are all pretty self-explanatory, and are just as accurate coming from either one of them. To me, at least, their entire dynamic is that they saved each other, in their own ways.

(But I will admit, the final verses about 'going out of your way to fix what you didn't break' are definitely conjuring up memories of Sam in the early days, literally going out of his way to visit and heal Darlin' after their fight with the two vamps. In general, his continued/repeated healing of them after they once again hurt themselves is the very literal definition of fixing what he didn't break.

But! While we may have more blatant examples of Sam being 'the fixer' so to speak, I think he'd argue that Darlin' has done plenty fixing of their own. Physical wounds aren't the only things that need healing, after all.)

-------

[shameless self-promo of my Sam & Darlin' playlist for those few of u interested enough to make it to the very end of this wall of text. if u liked this then u might like some of the other songs on there soooo maybe go check it out and maybe perhaps give it a follow so i can get a little serotonin boost or dopamine or whatever the chemical is that's released when Number Go Up. ...okay that's it i hope u enjoyed my fixation-induced ramblings! thank u and goodnight]

[crossbackpoke-check]

inspired by @colap1nto <3 and posting here to hold myself accountable: writevember! attempting to write something every day no matter how much and what it is

i am however inventing stipulations for myself so i cannot weasel my way out of it, which includes a valid definition of “write”:

actively put words into a document in the form of a proper fic!!! too many wip not enough hands!!

poems (actually laughed at me coming up with this but maybe i will go back to my roots)

research/meta/primers

tag stories are permissible IF i actually compile and edit them into a readable document that day

editing to post to ao3 (the optimism) is also valid. it takes me so long

i do have concrete arbitrary deadlines for one and a half fics that i would LOVE to finish and post in november (dewey^2 and [redacted :)]) so i’m hoping this helps!! also, this is secretly just a sticker chart where i get to put down emojis for each fic i worked on and check off boxes but a win is a win

day 1:🪻🐈‍⬛

day 2: 😇🤭 (🕒 -> 🕜)

day 3:🫃2️⃣

day 4: 🍎

day 5:🫃2️⃣

day 6: 📑, 💌

day 7:🫃2️⃣ AND ☁️💧. who is she

day 8:🪻🐈‍⬛

day 9:🫃2️⃣

day 10:🫃2️⃣

day 11:🫃2️⃣ we are on a STREAK and also a countdown 🫡

day 12:🫃2️⃣

day 13:🫃2️⃣

day 14: 📬💍

day 15: 😇🤭 (🕒 -> 🕜)

day 16:🫃2️⃣

day 17: 🔴 ⚫️,🫃2️⃣

day 18:🪻🐈‍⬛

day 19:🪻🐈‍⬛, 😇🤭 (🕒 -> 🕜)

day 20:🫃2️⃣

day 21:🫃2️⃣, 🤫 🪽🃏

day 22:🫃2️⃣

day 23: 💯❕

day 24: 🪢

day 25: 🐛🏮🦋

day 26:🫃2️⃣

day 27:🫃2️⃣

day 28:🫃2️⃣

day 29:🫃2️⃣

day 30:🫃2️⃣

WRITEMBER RECAP: an overall sucess!!!! this was so much fun and really forced me to write even if it was only a little bit every day. like, to the point that i'm debating doing a cute little twelve days of christmas snippet fest. absolutely could not have finished and published dewey^2 p2 without this challenge or posted p3 :)

thirty days of writing

twelve different fics worked on

poems: 1

i have no word count for you sorry i wish i did but it is at least over a few thousand words!!!!

times i wrote for a day past midnight (making it technically the next day) but because i was still awake i counted it for that day: at least 17 if not closer to like. 25

tags i forgot what they mean: one. what the FUCK is 🪢??? OH MY GOD I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THAT IS NEVERMIND

duolingo streak (worked on the same fic in a row): 5

[silkjade]

hi my love!! i was wondering about your museum au with Haitham and was curious about how you navigate your relationship at the museum? do y’all keep it quiet for awhile and sneak around >.> or do you tell your coworkers when you become an item hehe

eeeek gray i am so sorrrrry for answering this so late but i have been thinking n pondering n trying to flesh out this au more LOL >< but !!! not to worry as it was very much fun to do so, so tysm for the askie ily :DDD

in the museum au, me n haitham are actually exes in that, we dated in uni but i broke it off when i decided to take a job offer abroad n didn’t want to do long distance >< (sidenote : in a modern teyvat au, i imagine there to be a sort of ‘central’ city like republic city in atla, just so it makes it easier to pull characters from diff nations hehe) anyways, the breakup wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t super amicable either….

so it is quite tense when he is temporarily transferred here, but we do end up rekindling our relationship n getting along as Friends !!!! becus it really is sooo easy to fall back into the rhythm of things when there r still underlying feelings on both sides and um… we end up hooking up but it is casual ! just casual ! so casual ! that there’s no need to tell anyone much less hr about it ! but everyone kinda suspects there’s something going on, just not sure what… (we are definitely the topic of workplace gossip + some1 made a betting pool)

when we finally actually get together tho, we just play it off as normal, since we didn’t wanna deal w the attention (𖦹‸𖦹) we don’t tell anyone for a few weeks, but we don’t try particularly hard to hide it either…. becus his cologne seems to vaguely linger beneath my perfume (+ vice versa), and we always come out of the other’s office looking a bit disheveled ahem… what finally gets us tho is when haitham packs me a lunch he had made, and when faruzan (who works in the same dept. as him) makes a remark about how he’s never made any of our other coworkers/friends lunch… perhaps “because none of you are my girlfriend” kinda just slips out… O:

[deepseawave]

obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

[puppyeared]

man ok so you know the spiciness scale on menus that show you how spicy a dish is so you can order based on your tolerance. can we have that for sauces too please

[melloneah]

2 days till my final exam rant in tags sorry i gotta let it spill somewhere 😭

[indigopoptart]

man i love the people im surrounded with. how did this happen. youre all so lovely😭

[paging-possum]

I am attempting to put together coherent thoughts about the music in arcane and failing so so so miserably but like. dude I dont think ive ever had music in a show hit this hard I feel like show music in general can fly under the radar unless its like a big musical number but even the smaller instrumental songs are so gorgeous and have such an effect on the tone u know its like salt in that it takes the art and the story and it enhances it to be at an entirely new level. im normal about it IM NORMAL where is my violin

[mousemannation]

okay i am the first to admit the janscar agenda compels despite only approaching it from the tennis side but also my sacred tennis space is in a doomed situationship with f1 bc i literally cannot escape it 😭😭😭😭

[yuridotcom]

just watched scream 6, it was saur good