#god!sqh

[anachronismstellar]

OK OK OK I NEED TO SLEEP BUT

in celebration of @notsofrozt teasing art

(omg omg check this out ITS SO GOOL),

AND this fic reaching 35 pages (someone save me) here's more Airplane vs The System!

Let the games begin >:)

---

There was only one thing Shen Yuan hated more than being considered stupid and it was actually acting stupid.

Because why, WHY haven't they checked the bane of their existence, the persona non grata of binary code, the absolute most devilish collection of pixels and fuckery, aka the System?

It was right there, the notification blinking in green, marking it as a mission in progress.

He clicked, actually expecting more trouble on top of the Mobei business, only to be presented with-

Mission in progress: Author's favorite.

UV002 objective: aid UV001

Mission progress: 47%

What. The fuck.

He hadn't accepted any new missions, there wasn't even an obnoxious notification! And what's up with his objective?! Aid UV001?! How?! It didn't give him any other hint of what to do!

Oh he wasn't just angry, he was furious.

To the point that he had almost torn the door off its track when he opened it, the noise loud enough to startle Shang Qinghua into throwing his brush at him.

As if that would help against a real attack.

“Have you seen the new mission?!” He snapped as he entered Shang Qinghua's improvised office, glaring at the other trasmigrator.

“W-What?” Shang Qinghua blinked like a deer in the headlights, eyes puffed red as if had been crying moments ago.

Shan Yuan swallowed his pity, hardening his heart to focus on the task at hand. He closed the door to buy himself time before approaching the desk covered in parchment, slowly putting both hands on top of it to get closer to Airplane.

“Have you seen,” he pitched his voice low so they wouldn't be heard, doing his utmost to convey his fury through whispering. “The new. Mission.”

“Uh,” Airplane blinked again, scrubbing tears away, looking as lost as a puppy dropped from the moving truck. “Cucumber-bro-”

“Don't! You Cucumber-bro me,” he held himself back, closing his eyes to not lose his temper. “We're going to talk about your murderous ways later. Right now I need you to shut up and check. Your. System.”

He could see Airplane about to ask why, but his expression might have been terrifying enough because he just nodded and opened up his system, immediately frowning.

“What the fuck?”

“What? What is it?” Shen Yuan moved to get next to Airplane to better read what he was seeing. It never failed to amuse him how different their systems were: his looked like a proper video game menu, while Airplane's just looked like a lazy programmed blog.

“There's stuff missing. And I can't click on any missions. Like, I could at least check my old stuff? But now it's all gray?!”

“What do you mean?” At this point he was almost putting his face next to Airplane's so he could see, the bland white screen making his eyes burn. “Urgh how can you stand this, can't you change to dark mode? And go check for new missions.”

“As if, your system is way nicer than mine. Wait, do you have a new mission?”

“Yeah, it's called Author's Favorite. But it says nothing, just to help UV001. It's your user, right?”

-------

See you guys in the next update!

[rhiangalaxy]

@nibbelraz's SQH bros AU brings me so much joy

[ID: A Scum Villain Comic. Airplane/SQH as a child dressed in yellow and orange robes looks up happily and says "Gege, do you have games on your phone?" The next part depicts OG!Shang Qinghua ruffling Airplane's head with a tired look towards a paper simply responding "No." with a smaller chibi version of him next to his head saying 'What is a phone??' as if thinking internally. Airplane, whines "Awwww..." in response to SQH's No. End ID]

[nibbelraz]

Awe , God's first prayer 💞 this God is very stressed about it

[disgracefulthings]

At Qian Cao Peak

Mu Qingfang: Shixiong has been stressed lately. What is weighing on your mind?

Shang Qinghua: I can't really say- wait! You're a doctor, that means you took the Hippocratic Oath! Which means that whatever I tell you, you can't repeat it to the other peak lords...

Mu Qingfang: What is-

Shang Qinghua, not listening: Well it all started in a previous life...

Later

Shang Qinghua: ...and now Cucumber-Bro and I need to make sure the world doesn't end. Wow, it feels nice to get that off my chest. Thank you for listening, Mu-shidi! I'll be back in a week for our next session

Mu Qingfang: ...

Yue Qingyuan, walking up to him: What's wrong, shidi? You look spooked

Mu Qingfang: I can't say. Apparently I took a hypocrite oath

Yue Qingyuan: ?

[star-mail]

moshang stole my hamster :(

shniff shniff

part 1 part 2 [ extra: 1 & 2 ]

[sunderwight]

Thinking about Black Widow Luo Binghe.

Hear me out -- so just like in canon, Shen Qingqiu self-destructs to save Luo Binghe, dies, and Luo Binghe steals his body to put on ice while he looks for methods to resurrect him. But unlike in canon, staving off decomposition is simply not that doable for a matter of years, even with cultivation and Luo Binghe pouring qi into the process. The qi costs are still high, so is Xin Mo, and now Binghe also needs a special artifact that can actually preserve Shen Qingqiu, but that runs on blood sacrifices.

To get the thing working, Luo Binghe feeds it a bunch of prisoners from the Water Prison. Then he starts kidnapping cultivators to drain for his own qi reserves, but that's difficult, controversial, and he can't use the same victims for the blood sacrifice afterwards. Frankly, between one thing and another it would be easier to satisfy Xin Mo with dual cultivation, and focus on finding victims for Shizun's Snow White style glass preservation coffin without having to choose between using targets for one or the other. Especially given that, if he finesses it, Luo Binghe can extend the use of his sacrifices and get more out of them with fewer deaths that way.

He's pretty sure that Shizun would want fewer deaths.

Of course, he is not a fan of the logistics of the plan itself, but he'd do worse things to one day be reunited. He consoles himself that he's building up bedroom experience for one day being with Shen Qingqiu, and that it doesn't really count because his heart's not really in it, and also if Shizun got to spend all that time in brothels then it's only fitting that Luo Binghe be his equal in this as well. It still doesn't make it pleasant for him, but it makes him able to tolerate the necessity of it.

So Luo Binghe ends up marrying a string of rich and powerful figures -- mostly the villainous single fathers and mothers and evil uncles of harem members from PIDW, rather than their daughters -- and coming up with creative ways of making all their deaths a few months into the process look like accidents. After the third one people are undeniably wary of marrying him, but there's always someone with a big enough ego to think they'll be an exception, or stupid enough to believe that it really has just been so much bad luck up to that point. It helps that the universe is predisposed to let him hit it.

When SY wakes up in the shroom body and hears about Luo Binghe's succession of marriages, he's not surprised. What he is surprised by is the bisexual graveyard of toxic dilfs and milfs that has replaced the harem.

What did he do to cause that?!

And what does Luo Binghe mean that he wants to marry his own shizun now? Is this his new method of revenge??? Binghe, you don't have to marry someone to kill them!

[anachronismstellar]

hoLY SHIT HOLY SHIT I'M BEING NORMAL ABOUT THIS I SWEAR IM-

OK I LIED I'M SCREAMING AND CSDHAFUISDHIFSAHDIFHDSF

*holding this like is Simba from Lion King* LOOK LOOK HOW CUTE AND PRETTY AND CREEPY IT IS

AAAAAA thank you notsofrozt ;-------; omg bro hsaudhashdas

I'm saving this as my phone wallpaper istg aaaaa

[User_001 is not available at the moment]

I am completely and absolutely obsessed with @anachronismstellar's fic "Shang Qinghua vs the System". If you like BAMF SQH-centric fics, GO READ IT 🔫

PEAK FICTION PEAK EVERYTHING

Alternative version under the cut

[ineffectualdemon]

God SQH Idea: Shang Qinghua literally looks like a different person depending on what he wants/needa them to see

It's completely unconscious

The Peak Lords see a fellow peak lord. Beautiful but not outstanding. Capable and slightly subservient

Mobei Jun sees a handsome yet waifish cultivator. Delicate and beautiful

Luo Binghe, Sha Hualing, and most demons: see someone literally smaller then the others do. Small weak and unassuming. Plain even, to make it easier to hide

Peerless Cucumber, once the transmigrator reveal happens, sees Airplane Shooting towards the Sky. No artiface or jokes. Just a tired millennial with imperfect skin and a slightly crooked nose and nicely chubby.

Because fuck

He needs someone to see him

[nenestansunsthings]

having svsss au ideas beyond my station

thinking. shang qinghua goes on a mission as a young disciple to some town in fuckoff nowhere and finds himself in the qiu household. and there he finds a young shen jiu, undergoing the plot he originally intended for him and hadn't realised had become real and he's so young oh god hes so young why is he so small what do you mean that part was real, he hadn't kept it why is it real—

and he panics and sneaks him the Fuck out of that house

and he's not sure what to do but surely sending him to cang qiong will fuck up something in the plot and he can't come under even more investigation and cang qiong tryouts dont happen for months anyway and his system would probably never allow it (it doesnt. it would interfere with yue qingyuans story) but shen jiu is refusing to stay anywhere near this place and wants to learn cultivating to protect himself make sure nothing like this ever happens again and sqh panics harder and

calls mobei jun.

okay. on second thought, maybe this was a bad idea. but he stumbles over himself and shushes baby shen jiu's very understandable freaking out and asks his king for the first thing hes ever asked for other than his own life.

is there any way this human child could learn cultivation in the demon world?

[benevolenterrancy]

SQH prompt since you asked for one in the tags of that one post.

SQH and SQQ on their cart journey to get the sun moon dew mushroom seeds!

Thanks for the suggestion! I love their stupid little roadtrip together xD although this quickly became less about me figuring out SQH's hair/robes and more about me figuring out how in the world to draw a horse drawn carriage... SQQ needs to use his sword more just so I can avoid this

[bloodyfries]

Man, svsss is actually terrifying if you take away the humor and actually acknowledge what's actually happening

Like tbh I understand why sy was scared that lbh would still get revenge even after he was nice. All the other major plot lines had been happening. There were things he couldn't change, who was to say that lbh's revenge wasn't one of them

Also I don't think I'd be able to think straight if a god if some sorts played with my life, making me run around like a mouse in a maze to live. That actually terrifying. Then what happened when he failed a mission. Like, what. I'd be terrified. Sure, death was always a threat but actually experiencey arm getting ripped off??? I'd be scared our of mine to fail missions.

Don't even get me started on the occ point reductions. Imagine being ever so slightly pushed to death because you smiled at a kid.

Sqq was either not fully registering what was going on or was not all mental alright to be as calm as he was. I'd have broken so quickly under that. Sqq deserves to be a bit insane

Edit: reread the system punishment bit and Shen Qingqiu also got his leg ripped off right before the system took him out

[anachronismstellar]

Meanwhile, in Airplane vs The System fic:

Me: SVSSS fandom! Good news! I have a moshang scene!

SVSSS Fandom: Do you have a moshang scene or do you have a OG!Mobei/The System scene?

Me: I don't understand

SVSSS Fandom: are you actually writing a moshang scene next or are you writing OG!Mobei flirting with the System?

Me: I have a moshang scene! :)

SVSSS Fandom: excellent! Give it to me!

Me: here you go :) *hands in another OG!Mobei/The System scene*

SVSSS Fandom: ..... Thanks, Ana.

Me: you're welcome! :D

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Currently brainrotting over the idea of Mobei-jun as Hades and Shang Qinghua as Persephone. That is all.

[nibbelraz]

I completely forgot about the second "Daddy Airplane" incident

[disgracefulthings]

Shang Qinghua, mumbling: My kids are going to be the death of me...

Luo Binghe, ease dropping: Shang-Shishu has kids?

Shang Qinghua: Would it kill Junshang to do his own fucking paperwork...

Luo Binghe: SHANG-SHISHU IS MY DAD!?

[hopeless-avo]

What I wouldn't do to wrap Airplane-bro (SQH) like a burrito, give him a hot steaming bowl of noodles and a crushing hug (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠) (either from me or by throwing this man into Mobei-Jun's tits), especially most fanfiction versions of this guy!

Bro has been running the logistics peak, having to dance to the whims of the system, been thirsting over a dude who he has become terrified of BC of the hitting and foreseen death flags, all while being the best bro he can stand to be for Cucumber-bro (SQQ) to ensure their only alternative survival back-ups

I'm wondering how good his cultivation is to not immediately burnout by the end of the novels, given he had probably lived so high strung

Bro's more brave than me for all he gets called a coward in fanfiction