pretend-i-don-t-exist

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OK SO STROKE OF INSPIRATION

author!sy. can you see it. can you feel me

author!sy who has written some of the best novels known to media, who is gradually approaching global levels of fame. he just has the best world-building and plots! his characters are fully fleshed out and have backstories of their own that make it so difficult to hate any of them, because you can just understand where they're coming from, but they also did some very bad things, y'know?

except... all of his novels are tagged as danmei.

sy just doesn't understand why. he wasn't writing with these characters being together (in fact, he's sworn off romance in writing his novels, bc he thinks they make everything complicated) but somehow,,, his readers think the characters are together? why are his novels tagged as danmei?

so he goes down the rabbit hole and reads gay fanfiction to understand. it's not like he's gay, this is a just very author thing to do! you just want to understand what your readers think and what they want, right?

cue gay panic. he's stubbornly holding on. he fails. so he announces that he's taking a break (to maybe find out what the hell is going with him) and starts to read other novels.

enter pidw. sy absolutely loves the first few chapters. they were so good and the world-building looks so complex! then everything went to shit. he yells at airplane in the comments. he roasts the novel so hard it came out of the oven burnt from the outside in.

airplane only responds with ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ secretly, he's loving this new reader who had a history of critiquing novels very harshly, and creating theories that sometimes keeps the fandom alive through dying times

they chat privately, sometimes. there's a convention or smth, and both sy and sqh are invited. sy tells airplane that he's going to find him and yell at him irl. that, of course, happens but not after sqh finds out that /peerless cucumber/, pidw's no. 1 hater, is also the one of the world's top danmei writers.

sqh is like ??? a pretty boy is walking up to him angrily and is that-- oh no, oh no, oh no that is sqh's type

idk where i'm going with this but when they transmigrate sy absolutely writes xianxia versions of his novels and sqh finds out and now they have a competitive write off where they try to find who on earth is the better writer (sqh, now that he's not financially restricted, thinks he can do better than pidw) (sy, now able to shove his issues so far down they crawled out of the other side of the earth, thinks he can do better in general)

anyway svsss becomes less tragic bc sy and sqh are too busy writing gay ass novels to follow the plot, and liu mingyan absolutely writes fanfiction of their novels

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i am in class. that means i have one (1) hour to write

watch me write a crack fic that exhibits my mental instability

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i think my fixation is slowly moving from svsss to mdzs now. god help me

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sy as tianlang-jun. something can be written about that hm

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cheers to officially reaching 100k wc in my ao3 acc!

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You know what, fuck you. *spreadsheet-izes your danmei*

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i am so tired and burnt out rn so mqf here we go

he's a doctor he can (probably) relate to stem student burnout he can handle it

anyway mqf being exhausted after dealing with a) bai zhan peak disciples who have somehow managed to get all of them injured severely but not the crippling kind, just the ones that need either mqf's expertise or a senior healer, b) beast taming peak disciples who thought it was a good idea to pet a beast that it widely known to eat people who come too close, c) liu qingge, d) shen qingqiu, e) yue qingyan, and he does not get paid enough for this

idk sometimes people think the most bizarre things when they're very tired and so, mqf, after realizing that doctor-patient confidentiality does not equate to passively dealing with recurring patients, decides that Change Is Necessary

the next time lqg drops off disciples after "training", mqf heals them and yells at lqg with all the anger and exhaustion of a med school student. which is, yeah, you don't want to know

sqq overheard it and is very pleased. bonus points, bai zhan avoids harassing qing jing ever since mqf passive aggressively tells them that if they hurt disciples from another peak unprovoked, he's going to ban them from receiving medical treatment (it's an empty threat. but it works)

the next time sqq gets a qi deviation, mqf sits him down and tells him that if he doesn't get his shit together he will have to call an Intervention. of course, this does not go very well with sqq, so mqf calls an Intervention. sqh is suspiciously on board with this. he has all the materials needed. mqf wonders, then decides that sqh must be planning a long time before mqf lost his shit

a truth pollen or serum or whatever later, yqy and sqq are decidedly Not Pleased with them but mqf has one less problem (sqq's qi deviations) and that is Worth It. also he better be a vip guest in qijiu's wedding because he has gone through so much shit because of them

anyway he and sqh are bonding over everything and mqf has realized that sqh is, maybe, being courted by an ice demon king. mqf debates the ethics of sqh's maybe traitor-y ways then decides that sqh is too good of a gossip buddy to lose. mqf makes him realize that he's being courted. sqh faints. mqf tells him that he knows it's a pretend faint— he's witnessed and healed thousands of patients who fainted. who is sqh trying to fool here?

mqf also demands a vip invitation to moshang's wedding. anyway, his patients are the lowest in number since he became a peak lord, his sect leader is happy and willing to give qian cao more funds, he has a best friend in the form of a demon king's spouse (he can get demonic plants and beast parts for medicinal treatments!), and he is now Less Stressed. everything is fine. absolutely everything is fine.

sy transmigrates into a qian cao disciple npc and mqf sighs once he realizes he has Another Problem.

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1st set of svsss characters done!

SJ - LQG - YQY - MBJ - GYX - LBH (OG) - young LBH

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is posting my own fic here ok what are the rules or the etiquette i should follow,,, i. i am trying My Best

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ic: @batfam-stuff-posts-0

based on this post :))

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xiao jiu but he was never alone 🐈

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SY is the principal disciple!

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i have like three exams and two reports i need to do but shizun sy au i love you sm

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i like putting yqy in Situations. he's doing his best my poor little meow meow

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sy who transmigrates into sj's shizun and cares a bit too much,,, disciples yqy and sj who were stunned and suspicious (sj's case especially) by his kindness but then grew to develop some sort of protective and possessive feelings about sy when he just wouldn't Stop Caring For Them

qijiu happens when they get their mess sorted out with not so insignificant help from sy... sy got a gay panic when he finds out qijiu are together but then goes oh yeah that makes sense and is v supportive of them

might end up qijiuyuan w/ qijiu looking at sy tearfully and asking him not to leave them alone and sy just Crumbles and accepts and gets courted by qijiu for years until sy finally gets the hint

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shen yuan being animal obsessed to the point he starts trying to take everything remotely friendly home with him so one day returns with the xianxia equivalent of a scraggly possom that hisses at everyone it sees and that is definitely poisonous while still insisting its a little baby that needs a home

airplane never really expanded on the common creature worldbuilding in pidw like pigeons and cats and rabbits and raccoons, so shen yuan started filling in the blanks himself and oh boy did he fill it wrong. he pets a fox-like creature the size of a cow with horns and hooves like it's a horse not knowing that would be like trying to pet a grizzly bear. he coos over the owl-cats that live under overhangs and in dusty attics and really really wants one until liu qingge has to drag him away because they're some of the most awful aggressive pests you can have that swoop down on people and claw their faces open when they're mildly displeased.

one time he walked onto his peak with a six-legged spotted weasel in his sleeve bc it's so cute he just couldn't leave it!! not knowing said weasel is known as one of the most vicious predators because they tear through the calf muscles to cripple prey ten times their size and then eat them alive

however, because shen yuan has the disney princess subclass with a +7 proficiency in animal handling, it never goes wrong. he pets the fox-stag without an issue and it even allows him to climb onto its back. the owl-cats love him and happily play with his robes and fetch things for him. the six legged weasel lazes around the bamboo house all day and loves to be pet. the scaggly possom hisses at and hates everyone except shen yuan.

every other animal had to leave, except the possom. that is a fight they did not win. yue qingyuan only has so much strength and those teary eyes are lethal

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i've written 3.5k words of qijiu angst last night this is exactly how i feel