#go on somewhere with that bs
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as wwe is on i just wanna say how fucking hard it is as a girl who likes wrestling 😭
i want so much wwe merch/action figures to prop in my room but my mum keeps saying sexist shit liie “thats boy stuff” “ur not a boy” “ur not getting that boyish shit” as if women/girls dont…watch…wwe…and as if theres no…women…wrestlers….and an entire…womens…division…
#like girl bye#go on somewhere with that bs#if i say i want a chris sabin and alex shelley action figure rhats what ur gonna BUY /JJJJ#but no im so tired of this “wrestling is for boys” logic#WRESTLING IS ENJOYED BY EVERYONE. GET OVER IT#at this rate imma just buy them myself. i got birthday money.#you see i had to make my own danger days poster bc my mum keeps saying “these rock bands u like r emo and for boys” ugh#wwe#wwe lb#wwe friday night smackdown#friday night smackdown
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unable to stop dwelling on the discworld trouser leg of time where, in the penultimate fight scene in Nightwatch, Carcer manages to kill teenage Sam Vimes.
Which means that the future that Duke Vimes came from can no longer exist, which means he can’t go home. Meanwhile you’ve got a bunch of history monks with stored up temporal energy, a prepared space outside of time, and the need to do some desperate damage control before the Auditors get involved. Death shows up, reality is unweaving, Sam is reading Carcer his discworld miranda rights because what else is he supposed to do.
and finally, with little other option, the monks de-age Sam so he fits the time period and send him back out into the fray.
(they didn't call it deageing of course. His memory is hazy, splintered during that terrible in between moment, They....took the time out of him? Sanded away the edges of his self for a terrible, workable fit? It...wasn't a good feeling.)
Just—damn. Sam Vimes having to live his whole crapsack life over again, but this time as his disillusioned-reillusioned, unwillingly-character-developed, noir-epic, Duke of Ankh, Commander Sir Samuel Vimes self.
Younger (Older? He's never felt so Old, His steps so Childlike, reality twisting in his gut like one of Dibbler's pies) Sam Vimes walking around in a haze after the revolution. Desperate to go home, knowing he can’t. Wanting to drink. Knowing he can’t.
The whole precinct feels pity, he really took Keel’s death hard, hardly speaks except to do his job. Eventually he has to grit his teeth and start being present, because what else is there to do?
Resists the urge to drink until Colon takes the whole watch out to celebrate because -he’s going to be a father!
Come on Sammy, one drink won’t kill you— and after the first drink he’s cracking jokes and after the second hes smiling and after the third hes honestly the life of the party and sometime after that he’s crying about how he was going to be a father and my wife would be ashamed if she saw me drinking like this and—
Oh shit, Did anyone else know he had a wife?? A PREGNANT wife??? What—aren’t you like 12—no you're 17 now aren't you but when did—
You guys n’ver met ’er—oh gods none if you ev’n know ‘er, is jus’ me...
What—when did you lose—
I lost her the same damn day I los’ ev’rythin else, whadya think...bleeding Carcer...the fuckin revolution...
So! That! Sam only vaguely remembers the night, but rumors travel faster than light on the disc, so by the next day the whole damn city knows about poor Sam brung low by the loss of his poor, tragic, pregnant wife, so young to be a widower, and the Seamstresses nod because they already knew, don’t ask them how, somethings you just have to know in that trade.
And his mother—I don’t know, sue me, I’m a time travel fiend but there’s something deeply intriguing about a man meeting his dead parent, who is somewhat younger than him, and stepping into the old relationship like a badly fitting thing that's supposed to fit well. She would know, right? How would she deal with her son’s impossible grief? Maybe she wouldn’t know—he spent most of the time out of the house, running with different street gangs, maybe he avoids her until she dies and lives with the guilt twice over. God, we don’t even know her name. There’s just so much narrative and emotional potential that I don’t even know where to start.
When he’s on duty, which is most time - it’s agonizing because at first he remembers cases, saves lives that would have been lost. But the more time passes, the hazier his memory because in the original timeline he was becoming an alcoholic. Fuck! A kid dies and he could have saved her if he hadn’t been such a drunk, if he had just remembered where the asshole lived, but it’s all a haze, and he wants to drown out his guilt, but that’s what caused this in the first place.
Good young Sammy, who spends his rare off-time in dusty libraries (and yes, the irony that he’s apparently Carrot now is not lost on him) reading gods-only-know.
It’s not like he can ask the wizards for help, cutthroat and vicious as they are now in the not-so-distant-past.
Good young Sam, who...talks to the Broken Drum’s pet Bouncer like he’s a real person and not a dumb rock? That’s a bit weird, but he’s a bit of a funny guy.
Good old Sam, who believed the testimony of the dwarf who said the humans were trying to rob him and let the dwarf go??
the PROBLEMS this man would cause, good grief. Can you imagine a moderately progressive middle aged man with some degree of begrudging diversity and equity training that he did, for all his sins, pay attention to, suddenly going back to like, 1990, going back just 30 years, and going...oh damn this is kind of fucked up, no man you can’t say that, holy shit.
Except Sam’s lived through even more rapidly shifting social moroes! There’s no seamstress guild, there’s no women allowed inside the university, there’s no black ribboner’s society. People hunted trolls for their teeth! But Sam can’t just unlearn everything, and he can’t shut up, and he has no real luck and anyway he would absolutely get himself (temporarily) fired.
FUCK. Sam has no idea what to do with that. None. Zero clue. Wanders around in a haze until that dwarf he saved from police brutality finds him and insists on repaying the debt. No, he insists, do you have any idea what debt means to a dwarf?
“Sort-of?” he replies hesitantly, and that honest admission of incomplete knowledge shows a hell of a lot more respect and understanding than any self proclaimed dwarf-expert ever did.
Gets a job as a surface man, hauling rocks into the city. It’s backbreaking work, but, in true Discworld fashion, it’s also one hell of a workout (again the irony of being Carrot is not lost him. he freezes for a minute while hauling a rock cart, when he remembers he's technically Lost Nobility too, in a strict sense, but someone curses at him in the street and he's comfortingly grounded)
And here is where this au slides into a SPECTACULAR romantic comedy, BEAR WITH ME. Because in his time on the Watch he’s already done noir, action adventure, war story, detective who dunnit, psychological horror, but guards guards only allowed him to be a romance protagonist in an extremely limited context.
Give me righteous, twenty-something-looking, can’t-say-he-doesn’t-have-style, young Sam Vimes, not an alcoholic, being fed three square meals a day by his dwarven forced found family, hauling rocks. He is startled to find him bumping his head on a low hanging bar that he doesn’t think used to be there, eventually realizing that he’s an inch or two taller than he remembers. Huh. Guess all that bearhuggers really did stunt his growth.
Still doesn’t get what some of the looks from women he’s getting are about, sure, he’s dirty but so is everyone else. Fine, he took his shirt off, but it’s hot out, there’s far wrinklier than him hauling heavy loads, get a life.
Happens to glance in the Ankh one day when it’s particularly slow and shiny and is startled to realize that he might be turning heads for a different reason. Oh. Right, not that he was ever a heartbreaker, but he did alright for himself... when he was a younger and his face hadn’t been broken so many times. Which...it isn't now.
Is mildly disturbed by the revelation.
Especially once things blow over at the precinct and what with high mortality rates, he ends up with getting hired again. The boys are delighted to have him back, nevermind that he’s an odd one, noone is ever quite in your corner like Vimsey, absence makes the heart fonder, no one else works that hard, and he’s not even competition for promotion. All around great guy, we should set him up with somebody and just, no.
It just keeps getting worse! He’s literate! He’s a feminist! He believes abuse victims! He’s got a tragic backstory! He’s unreasonably good in a fistfight! He’s kind to animals! Word gets around that there’s a good man on the watch and he’s just waiting for a good woman to come snap him up. The widower excuse doesn’t hold people off completely, and for some it’s its own sort-of appeal.
Things REALLY become stressful after he rescues that carriage full of noblewoman.
What’s he supposed to do? Let them get robbed? Or worse? Chasing down and beating up 10 goons is as easy as beating up one, when they’re that stupid, getting separated like that, drunk and distracted, and he knows these streets better than anyone, really it’s nothing. And oh lord he’s Modest too.
I mean, they were genuinely greatful, as genuine as people like that are capable of being, the skill having grown rusty. And then there is something...magnetic about the man. An air of command.
So, soon enough you get Lady Marigold of Marigrave calling on Treckle Road for that gallant young officer who rescued them, she really needs to thank him. And Viscountess Elanor Thitzferal specifically requesting that he guard her at her next soiree. And Baroness Julieta van Shoeholten insisting that he come to her home while her husband’s away, for... manly protection.
Aaaah just zero sympathy from the guys. None. 'It’s become a competition, they’re just trying to see who can get me into bed first, it’s like I’m a piece of meat, you can’t send me sir, the Marquess greeted me in a nightee last time you made me go to—' and 'small gods Vimes are you even listening to yourself, shut the hell up'.
Simultaneous to this, (again this is several years into the timeline) swamp dragon accessories come into style. Which means abandoned swamp dragons scrounging on the street. Vimes takes one back to his apartment, blows his paycheck on dragon medicine, and eventually, heart in his chest, brings it to the Ramkin estate. The sunshine orphanage doesn’t even exist yet and he’s just standing outside the gates like an idiot, what is he thinking. Turns around, but her carriage is pulling up and—
well. they meet. it's cute. he's never felt so young. he's never felt so old, too old for her, too poor—
and certainly her thoughts linger too long on the awkward, kindly, handsome young commoner, but is it any wonder she doesn't quite connect it to the stern, dangerous, sexy young guard the ladies seem to be in some quiet, cuthroat competition over?
i have this gorgeous, absurd scene in my head in which Vimes is strong armed into standing guard at some high society soiree and one of the pushiest ladies insists he dance with here, or, if he prefers, if he's not confident about his skills, he can dance with her in-private at her home and he’s like [grinding teeth, looking for a way out, seeinf one] “I would be honored to dance with you.”
Steps right into some ultra-complex dance with multiple partner swaps (she never thought he'd pick this one, devilishly intimidating to one not strictly trained, and you barely spend anytime with your first partner).
But he does alright. Better than alright, for a common man, sometimes misstepping but his hands and feet always end up where they need to be. Raises several eyebrows part way into the song because he's throuwing in some slightly scandalous, no innovative, extra lifts and twirls that wouldn't become fashionable for another decade or two. Who even is that guy? Some out of towner? No, no he's in a guards uniform...how very strange.
Gets to Sybll and she's used to embarrassment during these dances, she tries to get out of them when she can... but can't always. Men awkwardly skipping the lifts, or worse, trying and failing. But him — oh it's him, the one who helped little Erold, and looked at her like—like—well like she was someone beautiful. And he's doing it again, and he's strong and there's a quiet moment where she's in the air, they lock eyes, and the rest of the room melts away.
And then the partners change again, the moment ended.
Just...living throught it all again. To the left, a dance he almost knows the steps to, throwing others off balance with erratic moves , honest mistakes, and delibrate stepping on toes. Improvising. Ruining. Improving. Getting far, far too much attention.
Hes almost excited when the first assassains start coming after him. It's like a hobby.
Everyone tells him he should get a hobby.
Interactions with young vetinari...I don't have the energy to write it all down, the slow circling in on each other, both burning with the need to fix the city, save it, their city.
needless to say he ends up fired again, life under real threat after offending some high lord.
Conveniently enough he has an employment opportunity- bodyguard to fucking Vetinari on his 'grand sneer.' The bastard knows vimes isn't what he seems, though sam is pretty sure that he doesnt know the exacts.
Vetinari hypothesis:(the ghost of keel? Keels son, with some hereditary curse? Or a larger spirit of justice possessing a string of unrelated souls? He knows things he shouldn't- mind reader? Fortune teller? Havelock once arranged for a wizard to bump into him on the street, the magical fool gave an odd double look and then muttered something about destiny looping in on itself giving him a headache. Destiny? Lost noble? And hes far too familiar with sybyl, one of the few bearable noblewomen in this city. And his thoughts on guilds, when havelock can trip him into speaking... Most of all, if hes reading him at all correctly (for all the mystery hes not that hard to read, unless thats a very clever cover) then it seems that behind those dark haunted eyes is Respect. Loyalty. For vetinari. What an interesting man. A puzzling asset. An intriguing threat. )
Did I mention the timeline is changing, healing slowly around the place where it was torn? Healing enough around scars to perhaps get some flexibility back, with some painful stretches and...massaging of said scar tissue?
And hes heading to unresting uberwald, a place where a werewolf pack still hunts humans and, truely unrelated but perhaps equally exhausting, an eldritch spirit of vengeance just might be looking to stretch its legs in a hapless vessel?
Opening drabble Vimes Vetinari Meta (Unwell) Scene from the Uberwald Grand Sneer
#discworld#sam vimes#discworld au#nightwatch au#i literally drafted this post in December 2021#and i know it was living in my head for years already at that point#i have more somewhere aging like cheese in the back of my mind#discworld fanfic#night watch#Let this be free from my mind#Perhaps someone else will write it#BE FREE ANCIENT AU OF MY SOUL#For all my obsession with discworld I have but this one (1) AU though it tears at me like the seam of a pair of pants#The songs I have permanently associated with this au are slightly bonkers by the way#My au#Seriously there's like two full novels worth of content up here. Sybyll running away from home and living as a commoner#To mirror Sam joining upper class in original timeline you see?#Some early discworld murder Wizard nonsense when they try to poke at the temporal anomaly and the universe goes brrrr#Eventually catching up with color of Magic city burning bs and vimes is mad as fuck#Weird year that never was protecting people during sourcery#And when we start catching up with where he left#Oh ho ho you can't to forward to something that doesn't exist but maybe you can go sideways to a place that's got a tear in it#A sam vimes shaped tear#And his pregnant wife from 30 years ago in the other trouser leg#AND that's not even mentioning how carcers trial got taken to a...higher court
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MY NEW VISION I JUST RECEIVED. TRUST
#post#arcane#arcane spoilers#someone needs to get screenshots of jayces hallucinations but im sure it was all machine herald bs#im going to rewatch a billion times but right now im soooo sure viktor himself got jayce to kill him. i feel it in my bones#edit i rewatched the episode and scoured for detail jayce was hallucinating alternate??universe?? viktor followers???#no clues as to who told him to kill him as i can tell though but it could very well be viktor from somewhere else too#godddd so interesting. show us the ekko jayce heimer sidequest next week
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If liu mingyan can write ancient fanfiction, I just need sha hualing to get into writing gossip girl columns
#every week she sticks a scroll into sqh’s delivery systems#she basically sees every single piece of shit going on#or somewhere in anding#and she’s so done#and every peak gets unwarranted opinions of a very angry but funny ranter who#is putting things together in front of sqq#everyone is finally glad that someone is writing about all this bs#every week they look forward to the message deliveries#suddenly sqh realises he has a boom in business#then one day shl writes about him and mbj#sha hualing#svsss
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Love how people are SHOCKED when they come on a Pro Jedi blog and criticize the Jedi for particularly heinous bullshit and the Pro Jedi person gets defensive and upset in response.
Wow, no one could have seen that coming.
#fandom wank#pro jedi#pro jedi culture#pro jedi order#listen if you sit there and criticize the jedi in the notes of my posts i will block you at this point#i am beyond debating this bullshit with people#if you want to criticize the jedi go somewhere else#this means any and all gray jedi bs#this means calling the jedi slave owners#this means calling the jedi arrogant or complacent#this means any use of the word cult or indoctrination wrt the jedi's culture#if you put it in my notes you are no longer allowed to interact with my blog again
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#going through an absolutely uh heart wrenching breakup right now and#i need someone older and wiser to tell me how this goes#we live together. she wants to be single. i want to keep her as my lover. i wanted to live with her like lovers for the rest of our lives.#we want to stay friends. we're best friends. weve dated for 6.5 years. im nauseous in denial i don't have people who know how to help me#dumb putting this bs on glitter blog but just in case anyone has survived something like this and can DM me hi#how do you live with someone youve had the best times of ur life with when they don't want you to be more than friends#i want to hold her forever. she doesn't want to be beholden to anyone in this point of life.#im deleting this post later just hoping someone might see and help bc i am absolutely lost and dont know how on earth to act#im in fuckin nyc and it hurts being alone somewhere so big. crying on the subway and shit.#we live together. we live together. the lease ends february 2025. what the fuck. its a studio apartment. its one room and one bed.#op barks
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Fml. I have mental illnesses for real fhat arent just garden variety anxiety and depression <- sorry it turned into a vent/rant in the tags. The perilous poster
#THIS IS NOTHING IM FINE !!!#i just had to remember earlier that sometimes i dont get to be myself#and i drove through my ahit moms town for no reason#and we got a kitten and of course i feel like the only one reasonably concerned#so idk if my concerns are valid or if im overreacting and i dont know how much of my worry is justified#what if im just being a party pooper?#ANDDDD on top of that i dont know where the kitten is rn. and its fine. ots fine#but my mind keeps flashing me images of him stuck somewhere or hurt or somethinf#and i was supposed to be watching him but i left to make food#but my family keeps going 'oh lets do a small trip' so i dont add anything to the list#and then they get a bunch of bs and i dont get any food#WE DONT NEED COSMIC BROWNIES MAN I NEED TO EAT A REAL MEAL THAT MAKES ME FULL PLEASE GOD#and our older cat hates the kitten and im worried the stress is gonna kill him because hes fucking 19#agghh aaghhhhhhh and i cant keep up with everyone and im overwhelmed and i think im just like#upset because i havnt had real food but fuck man idk what to do about that#i coukd bike down to the store and get a sandwich#but my stupid brain keeps going 'if you leave the kitten will die and its your fault'#even though thats not fuckong correct#and i just. aaghhh. aaghhhhhh#and im overheatinf rn but i cant go to my room bc aforementioned kitten desth prophecies#and i. just. aaghhhh ghhhhrrhhhh ghrrrr#im fine im fine i just need to complain i need to be a bitch#ANDDD im tired cause i coulsnt sleep which isng helping#god ive been having a bunch of panic attacks lately too i stopped having them so much after quitting school
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Not someone on twitter calling occult gameplay/packs for sims 4 "evil" lmao 😭 they sounded like one of those grandmas complaining about metal music and alternative clothes,like sweetie just bc you don't play with occults and prefer family and realistic gameplay doesn't mean everyone dose and we didn't get any new occult since werewolves so shut the fuck up lol
ps.Just to be clear I have nothing against family gameplay,I play it myslef too,mostly with vampires than regular human sims but I do!
#sims 4#ts4#kisa speaking#cw swearing#twitter as always is unhinged#take your catholic/christian priest bs talk somewhere eles lol#evil my ass#go to bed grandma
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"Vote 3rd party."
Vote for 1% polling bitch and waste the vote? AHAHAHAHA
#us politics#politics#what a joke#yall only bring up this low rate bs up every 4 years#go be a loser somewhere else
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This beta training sequence always has me questioning what Derek learned from Talia. I can definitely imagine her having Laura, Cora and Derek attack her to learn how to fight.
And it's a much more playful, positive thing, I think.
But then the way Derek is "I'm teaching you how to survive" makes me think about how often Derek has seen everyone he knows dies.
He's so out of his depth, but in his own way he's trying.
#teen wolf#derek hale#laura hale#cora hale#talia hale#this is another rambly thought that could go somewhere one day maybe#rewatch bs
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The account of death threats he gets I doubt he cares if ppl claim to own him
#nectar's rambling#♡ anon#anon message#i've seen the threats#fucked up fr#the messages and whoever who sends that shit to anyone#disgusting#disrespectful#disturbing#and whatever dis‐ word y'all want#and I have no idea#but even if he's a masochist or not#which I repeat I have no idea about#it's still awful asf#so nah#we ain't going to mess around w owning and simping bs here#or at least not this much#and so randomly#bc dude probably has his limit somewhere too#alright?#mwah to everyone
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i just realised i should probably make a post to pin just with some basic info about me oops
my name’s Slip it’s not my real name but that’s what i like to go by online U_U
i’m an 03 baby and i am british (sad!)
i’m an aspiring concept artist/character designer i’m not the best but i’m certainly improving at it (i think)
i watch anime and cartoons, i play a lot of games and get really invested in completely different fandoms on a whim yknow how it is.
i love making silly aus and ocs !!!!!! idk if i’ll post the ocs here we’ll see
i have other socials here:
spam instagram
art instagram
main tumblr
twitter
if you like my art consider buying me a coffee here :D no pressure though
also dm me for my discord handle!!
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I'm so fucking excited to go to the osaka aquarium.
Like the childlike wonder and joy I have for an aquarium.
They have fucking mola mola and a whale shark.
And a special night time event....
#fyi if anyone comes into my inbox complaining about aquariums you can go get a job and leave me alone#are there problems? yeah ofc#but even if you find it frustrating people-humans-NEED to see the things were telling them to care about sometimes to care#that doesnt make anyone lesser by the way so take weird self righteous bs somewhere else#also insane to think out of the sheer amount of people working at aquariums worldwide that every one of them is cruel to every fish#most reputable aquariums and zoos do more for conservation and informing the public than the people complaining#we are not a perfect world and to demand so is not humanly possible#i h8 that i feel i need to back up myself for just being excited for something but ive lost trust in a lot of tumblr...
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Need to stop making jokes about my grief and depression but then literally who would I be anymore.
#idk who I am if I’m not constantly making fun of myself and all my problems#and usually not dealing with them#my sadness is like a bandaid that I refuse to rip off and instead I’m just peeling it agonizingly slow and it’s also somehow peeling all of#the skin off my body at the same time and I become a live wound of a person#I wish I had my shit together enough for college or living on my own bs sometimes I think the only thing that would fix me would be picking#me up and putting me in a different state somewhere up north closer to my friends and like that’s all I need to fix me#if I wasn’t so painfully isolated life would be stellar but i can’t ever bring myself to reach out and I’m afraid constantly that everyone#hates me and is wishing I’d stop bothering them wahhhhhhhh I hate it !!!! my brain is evil!!!! I hate that it’s attatched to the rest of me!#my mom will be like. you don’t take responsibility for yourself and your feelings and you wallow in them and you blame your brain instead of#fixing yourself and I’ll be like. 😐. so how do I stop? and she’s like. idk.#I feel like my head is on fire I’m pausing my tolerance break tonight I’m gonna go get some mystery weed from my moms weed tray and pack a#bowl and probably cry some more#why did the year and a half dad death anniversary have to happen on such a humid day I just wanna walk thru the woods and cry and smoke
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i love you guys so much meme left is Mia and Ethan from Resident Evil and Bellamy Blake and Clarke Griffin from t100
#the 100#resident evil#bellarke#mithan#will i elaborate? maybe#simple answer (as I haven't watched the show in a bit)#characters make mistake and do very dark things#hated by the fandom to a extortionate amount? check#ethan for killing the lords/ not being a therapist to the people trying to fucking kill him#mia for being involved with evie (valid however most of the hate i've seen has positioned Mia in a position of power)#and made no mention of her boss director (actually called that in game) douche and makes no mention of how much worse lucas/miranda is#clarke for being forced into hard choices (both in show and out of show she is hated for being forced between bomb or gun so many times)#bellamy for attacking an innocent army of grounders (bleh) and just daring to exist in the presence of a white woman etc (lot of it is bs)#and the positives clarke protecting bellamy not knowing what will happen to her/ sending her daughter to the frontlines of a war#(i do have problems with the latter on account of 12 year old and other things)#bellamy seeing morse code being tapped out on clarks arm and going clarke is still alive lets get her back/ the entire CPR scene#valeveira (and cleon) is somewhere between them and jeresa n a bi4bi way#you know devotion connections etc#mia winters#ethan winters#bellamy blake#clarke griffin
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he's HORRIBLE
#tm#all the bullshit she put up with from him for 10 years and she's late to a crime scene ONCE and look at him ffajdslk#as if you give one single shit about punctuality patrick; but this brings up a point that i can't believe i never considered in all my bs:#does patrick jane know how to be jealous? discuss#i mean...obviously he KNOWS but....does he though#at the very least he's exceedingly out of practice#of course we know next to nothing about his and angela's relationship but between that and this he's basically had 10+ years of red john#and we know lisbon dated during that time (and we know he DID get jealous because...obviously how could he not)#but not jealous in a way he could act on - in part because ms 'intense and particular' didn't seem to have many repeat dates#(idiots) but mainly because of the red john of it all#i doubt he realized it on any conscious level (and if he did he repressed/ignored the shit out of it)#but he couldn't see anything happening with them while he had red john hanging over his head#(tangent: all his 'you deserve a good man' 'he's a good man' later on...he really doesn't see himself as a good man does he#my poor little meow meow - thinking about naomi's tags about the letter again god i wish that had happened)#and she deserves better than that; deserves better than him (SOB); so he lets the hints and the moments of jealousy pass by#but now....well now there's no more red john#he's still got a LOT to work through but that gigantic weight is off his shoulders and there's been this shift between them#(i can't come up with a better way of saying it than) they're flirting like they mean it....not that they didn't before#but now there's this sense of actual possibility behind it; this could be going somewhere; it's slow but they're taking actual (baby) steps#and then pike shows up and the whole thing is imploding as they speak - like he knows from the second that cab pulls up#how her date went and she knows that he'd know and they're just talking around it and they're so AWKWARD where they'd been#working so well together (minus an airplane ride or two)#and now he's trying REAL hard to be supportive even though he probably wants to curl up and sob#because he wants her to be happy (more than maybe anything he wants her to be happy) and he couldn't make her as happy as pike#she deserves a GOOD man and that is not him; she shouldn't have to put her life on hold for him anymore she's done that too much already#but what he doesn't get - what he can't quite comprehend (what absolutely stuns/amazes/thrills him at the end of blue bird)#is he DOES make her happy; he IS a good man (he might be the best man she knows; flaws and all); and (in this instance)#she'd be more than willing to wait for him; to be patient with him#if he'd only let her know that there's something there to wait for; something concrete they could be heading towards together
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