#girl the way that this stresses me out
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#girl the way that this stresses me out#like i wanna say it the Swedish way but then i just end up sounding like a FOOL#the same goes for the American way#it just sounds stupid#like which one is it#can someone agree with me#please anyone#and PLEASE tell me which is the better way#anyway...#young royals s2#young royals#simon x wille#simon x wilhelm#simon eriksson#crown prince wilhelm
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Growing up w no Instagram does SOMETHING to a bitch like I really get taken aback by how second nature it is for people to whip out their phones and take pictures of the most mundane things. Not because I judge them for it but bc apart from selfies, pictures w friends, and obligatory pictures on trips I literally forget to take pictures of my life period
#I’m not the kind of girl who’ll be studying at a cafe and thinks to snap a picture of my cute latte art#I’m never somewhere and go Ohhh this would be a good angle…. Like I just don’t do that#At first the way I rationalized it is I don’t wanna stress myself out taking aesthetic pictures but now I’m like#Compared to other people I don’t rly have proof of cute little tender moments#And one day I’ll be old and decrepit and I won’t have many of these diminutive memories still#So I rly wanna change that by being more intentional ab taking photos#And maybe sharing some of them SPARINGLY bc I want it to mostly be for me#But just making it more of a priority to capture little things I’ll look back on when I’m older#I think taking more pictures is part of my 2024 resolution anyway I just haven’t implemented it thus far
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Imagine being 9 years old and asking your dad about the things you're interested in doing when you grow up and he's like "No ❤️! But you can get married, have babies, and then maybe your sons can do those things ☺️🫶 "
#arya stark#one of those /wtf Ned/ moments#then people act like she invented misogyny cause she was like /uuuhhhhh no thanks that's not me/#/Arya is masculine/ and she's literally just a child who has interests outside of her patriarchy-assigned role#the way people read this and then demonize Arya for not silently conforming like people expect her to...#that's the ingrained misogyny from being socialized in a patriarchal society speaking babes 😭#cannot stress enough how Arya is just an average little girl and what makes her behavior stand out is their society's strict gender norms#her life + learning almost entirely revolves around the fact that she is being raised to be a wife and people resent her for wanting more :#she is NINE in AGoT and her parents are discussing her refinement because /In a few years she will be of an age to marry/#the way misogyny is explored in Arya's story is actually so brilliant and well-written (+ underappreciated) though#we feel the full weight of how restrictive their society is through her POV and get the experiences of lower-class women too#which is why it's so significant that George wrote her based on feminists who realized they wanted more than becoming wives/housewives#she's one of his key characters who will /change the world/ but people think he's sticking her on a boat bc she isn't feminine enough 😭#thank god he's writing the books and not any of these reductive hacks who thinks misogyny is subversive 🙏🏾#sidenote: would've loved to see this from her POV to get her feelings when he said this cause I'm sure it doesn't match Ned's perception#considering he views her main issues as being stubborn/difficult while we know about the self-esteem issues she has
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🪡 + 🔨 | more yapping!!
NOTE: because so many bigger members of the Avarice Battalion are from the Omega clan, a big portion go to The Garden to celebrate the Omega Tree every Spring (a large symbol of longevity and legacy for the clan...before they burned down lmaooo!!!).
#tw blood#stressmonster101#iskall85#hermitcraft#soul eater#SELOTV#✩ | bonnies scribbles!#i just love backstories - hey girl why are you CRAZY!!!#their first meeting was stress punching iskall in the face for stealing her skulls repeatedly - get him girl!!#flora witches dont typically hide their bloomed flowers away - if they dont get enough sun they become sad and their personality changes.#<- the ones the live above ground at least!#you'll see throughout other rambles that iskall is very respectful of nature because he's scared of flora witches - especially The Mother 💀#i know this isnt how witches function in Soul Eater but i hold the power to make this my canon! strap in its redstone witches next!#tubbo?! whoa what are you doing here youre not even born yet when this story takes place omg!! get outta here!#the idea that a flora witch's flower just grows out of their head is so silly to me i needed it#the Avarice isn't really a military for anyone in this moment but i thought the name was cool as hell#mwawhwhawa being indebted!! that will totally never come up every again!!!!!! never!!!!!!!#stress having a witches soul which BY THE WAY has the ability to turn a demon scythe into a death scythe is TOTALY not going to be plot -#relevant!! thats crazy id never do that!!!!
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wip wednesday
tagged by @theotherbuckley @daffi-990 @tizniz @bidisasterevankinard @dangerpronebuddie @hoodie-buck @aroeddiediaz 💖
I'm jumping between wips and ships so much rn, but trust me, it's even more chaotic in my brain like at all times lol it's so annoying
wasn't gonna post today but I figured I'd share a bit of the cheating fic bc I moved my self-imposed deadline to middle of may and istg I'm not moving it again so I need motivation to finish this lmao
(this scene is fighting me ngl, but I need it, and it's just gonna need a lot of editing but for now this is just a rough draft lol)
prev snippet
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Not breaking the kiss, Eddie shifts, throwing his leg over Buck’s lap, straddling him, and Buck’s hands immediately wrap around his hips, bringing him closer, as close as possible, just needing Eddie closer. Eddie gasps when their crotches collide, and breaks the kiss, Buck’s lips moving to Eddie’s neck.
“Buck.” Eddie whispers. “Buck, we- we should talk.” Eddie tries, but one of his hands is tangled in Buk’s hair, holding on tight. Buck stills his movements, looks up at Eddie and sees reluctance in his face. He’s not sure if it’s reluctance to stop or continue, and he needs to know for sure, would never want Eddie to feel pressured in any way. They have no alcohol to blame this time, after all.
“If you want to, let’s stop, and we can talk.” Buck says, voice a little shaky as he adds, “But we can always talk tomorrow?”, knowing this is a very bad decision, once again. He’s looking at Eddie’s face and sees something complicated, a conflict, a battle with himself. His eyes roam over Buck’s face, lingering on his eyes, then lips, then back to eyes. In the end, some part of Eddie wins, or loses, and he captures Buck’s lips with his own again.
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no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @thebravebitch @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck
@eowon @loserdiaz @evanbegins @ladydorian05 @wildlife4life
@diazpatcher @lover-of-mine @monsterrae1 @thewolvesof1998 @weewootruck
@loveyouanyway @spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff
@spotsandsocks @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @nmcggg @rogerzsteven @hippolotamus
@giddyupbuck @sunshinediaz @honestlydarkprincess @underwaterninja13 @exhuastedpigeon
@911-on-abc @jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @buddieswhvre @fortheloveofbuddie
@diazsdimples @your-catfish-friend
#wip wednesday#buddie cheating fic#eddie is not able to resist buck for the third time in this fic oops lol#both of them are so messy and make such bad decisions and i'm living for it <3#also im almost sure there will be an eddie pov chapter after this so let's hope i don't forget this moment and his thoughts here lmao#tbh I'm about to have a stressful day in two days and I'm already stressing out and can't really focus on writing#but also need it to distract me lol#fic: got a girl at home (but I love the way you taste)#fic snippet#buddie#buddie fic#buddie wip#wikiangela writes#my writing#my wips#also writing two bucktommy fics rn that take more of my attention than this ngl lol i'll be fully back to it soon tho haha
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you know how in school they’d always make you (still make you) like choose random topics to give class presentations on while everyone politely clapped even though they didn’t really care about your powerpoint on fungi or whatever bc they’re too worried about getting their own over with. tumblr is like if every single person in the room was paying full attention and was absolutely stoked about it and gave you wild applause and wolf whistles at the end. you can just get on stage and talk about coelacanths and you become a celebrity for a few minutes. like on tumblr it’s on your own terms so it’s like oh snap education is actually supposed to be fun
#this is to say i got a big presentation out of the way today that i was stressing about#or rather i should say i thought about it as ‘getting it out of the way’#but then once i completed it and was ready to present i was like wait this is actually so cool i’m so excited to present#like i was waiting patiently for my turn#and i had a GREAT time yapping for eight minutes about parthenogenesis in sharks#and i’m like aw i’m kinda sad the project is over… :(#maybe i will yap about it on here some time#i love genetics it’s sooooo cool to me i love you punnet squares i love you genes and reproduction#peach rambles#ALSO i got complimented on the presentation by the girl i wanna befriend sooo bad#like holy snap we have similar energy and we both get way too into this class …#and then we yapped for like 15 minutes more on stuff bc we had to do a ‘group discussion’ for something unrelated in that class#and we were literally the only two people in our section doing that thing#we were only like half on topic lol#can’t beat the ADHDemons#then i had Another presentation in the class right after that and it was kind of terrible bc i can only prepare for one thing at a time smh#but it was much lower stakes so#but like WHEWWWWW i can’t believe i got a chain of massive assignments out of the way…. it’s been a wacky past 48 hours
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so there's a reason my new job got back to me so quickly about my application and that's bc it's an absolute fucking shambles like actually perfect timing for me to decide to rewatch the bear bc i have never more felt like ive been thrown into a broke on-its-knees establishment trying to crawl its way up the ladder where i am somehow a godsend to them. my old job was crazy and shambolic in the sense that the industry is just Like That but this one?????? insanity. every 5 mins i am questioning what im doing with my life. ive already had a walk-in fridge moment
#so i explained before that there's 3 venues and on my very first shift they had me doing the restaurant venue for 2 hours#which was FINE like i was a bit cautious bc my manager is VERY stressed all the time and the place generally feels like it's falling apart#not the building itself just. the way it's run like it's just got new owners and the previous manager apparently#EMPTIED THE TILLS AND TRASHED THE PLACE like cost them THOUSANDS of pounds and on top of that#there was beef with the head chef and the new owners that meant he left and took the ENTIRE BACK OF HOUSE WITH HIM#THERE ARE NO KITCHEN STAFF ATM. I HAVE TO LIE AND TELL CUSTOMERS WE DONT HAVE FOOD ATM BC OF 'REFURBISHMENT'#WHEN IN ACTUALITY THE /RESTAURANT/ DOESNT HAVE CHEFS. DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT IS#and then the front of house staff are very lacking aside maybe 2 people we're ALL NEW and all of them EXCEPT ME#LIKE LITERALLY JUST ME IM THE ONLY EXCEPTION. ALL OF THEM ARE UNTRAINED#so when i applied with bar training coffee training and very solid waitressing skills they genuinely treated me like a saviour#like i am FENDING off shifts tbh im in a v good position bc they need me too much to get shitty w me if i refuse hours but i can literally#have as many as i want bc they will just give me them. like they're obsessed w me im rota'd for over 60 hours this week#but anyway that very first shift after 2 hours in the restaurant i then walked to the mini golf venue on the OTHER SIDE OF TOWN#and my manager stayed for 30 MINUTES. IF THAT. and showed me around the place + how to close THEN LEFT ME THERE#FIRST DAY HE GAVE ME THE KEYS AND LEFT ME TO RUN AN ENTIRE VENUE. IT'S NOT SMALL EITHER IT'S A WHOLE BAR#AND I HAD TO CLOSE ON MY OWN TOO and ironically the shift itself went rlly well like it was so chill#it was kinda boring but honestly i kinda rated it it's v easy money and the close went perfectly nothing cropped up that i was unsure about#and then. AND THEN. i havent even ranted to my mutuals about this yet bc i was acc so horrified by it but i locked the front doors#and went to lock the gate AND THE KEY GOT STUCK IN THE LOCK. WOULD NOT COME OUT. HELLA VS KEYS ROUND 3927593#my mum even showed up and tried to help me wrestle this thing out i called my manager and he literally told me to just snap it#bc he'd rather a snapped key that NO ONE could get out than just leave it there overnight but bc of my recent house key moment#i was like AM I FUCK SNAPPING THIS KEY. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING. so i had to just leave it and at the time#i was realllyyyyyyyyyy beating myself up but my manager is actually rlly nice he's just stretched v thin#and ive also had time to be like uhh actually they shouldnt have left a random 21 y/o girl alone with the keys on her first day#omg i havent even talked about what happened on saturday. ACTUAL SHAMBLES#LIKE THIS /\/\ ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO EVERYTHING! IM RUNNING OUT OF TAG ROOM! IM GONNA REBLOG THIS TONIGHT W MORE PROBABLY!#BC GUESS WHO IS WORKING A CLOSE LATER AT THE NIGHTCLUB THEN OPENING THE RESTAURANT AT 8AM. GUESS#hella slaves to capitalism
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I'm not a writer but i had this thought so- bear with me, yeah?
For months Eddie hears all about how cool and badass Steve Harrington is, yeah, but you know what he also hears about? How Steve and Robin are made for each other and how cool and pretty Robin is and how stupid it is that they're not a couple for some dumb reason, like Steve not wanting to be with a band geek and still clinging to high school hierarchy. And in all of the things Dustin says about Steeeve Harrington, that last part is the only thing that fits into the Munson Doctrine, so obviously everything else Henderson is saying is what's skewed in his little shrimp world view.
Steve Harrington thinks he's better than a band geek and that's why we won't look twice at a girl that would be perfect for him (according to Dustin Henderson, so... still questionably trustworthy information). Eddie probably assumes Dustin is talking up how close Steve and Robin actually are, just how he's exaggerating how close Dustin himself is to Harrington (like that would impress Eddie and the rest of Hellfire??? He really doesn't know how to get through to the little sheep that his worship of Hawkins' most notorious square is a detriment to his character and not something Eddie would find impressive. If it was real. Which it obviously isn't. Anyway-)
Turns out? Steve Harrington? Actually a cool dude. Not cool as in popular but cool as in "holy shit did he just bite that thing's head off???? Oh and he's not even gonna brag about that, it's just nbd, yeah sure, cool cool cool be fucking cool Eddie, oh god he's talking to me why is he talking to me" and just, chill to hang out with. After the whole shit show went down. Who would have fucking thought, huh? (except for Dustin Henderson, yeah yeah yeah, shut up)
So now Eddie has to reevaluate some other assumptions he made. Maybe Dustin was right and Steve actually is cool and badass, and he and Buckley actually are as close as he had said (and they really fucking are! He has seen them give Keith eerily matching bitchy looks for trying to schedule them on opposing shifts and basically bully the guy into changing the schedule around so they can spend as much time as possible in each other's presence. It's enough to make a guy question his own friendships when sometimes a few hours of band practice are enough to make him want to never see any of those chucklefucks again. Of course, that feeling abates but seriously, how are those two never sick of each other??)
So if they're as close as advertised but not a couple (and after meeting everyone Steve cares about and they're basically all nerds so the "Harrington thinks he's too good for a band geek" thing can't actually hold true-) what is the hold-up? Why aren't they a couple? And somehow, somehow Eddie comes to the conclusion that Steve is in love with Robin. Steve is a serial romantic (emphasis on romantic) and while his love life isn't the talk of the town post-earthquakes as it would have been before, people do still talk about the fact that he hasn't taken out a girl since it happened.
Which brings us to a day in summer, maybe fall, after Eddie has seen Steve look wistfully at a young couple with a baby, that he shows up at Robin's door step.
"Eddie? Hey what's up?"
"Good, good, how are you? Uhh can I... can I come in?" There's a nervous energy around him that is immediately infectious and she leads him to the living room where he immediately starts walking back and forth in front of the couch. She watches him for a moment, hands fluttering through different motions trying to find one that might calm him down before giving up on that. Instead Robin swerves around him, clambering onto the couch and wrapping her arms around her right leg, putting her head on her knee. She follows Eddie's path with her eyes and decides to wait before quickly realizing that she can't, actually.
"As riveting as it is watching you walk a groove into my parents' rug, do you maybe want to say something? I mean I can definitely talk enough for the both if us if that's what you want it's just that I have the slight suspicion you've got something you need to get off your chest" Eddie stopped walking halfway through her monologue and starts nodding.
"Yeah. Yeah yeah yes you're right it's just- I haven't a hundred percent made up my mind about saying something", Eddie has one arm wrapped around himself and uses the other to alternately play with his hair and gesticulate at her, "because on the one hand it's a little bit driving me crazy, maybe, but on the other hand this is none of my fucking business" And Robin who was worried at first just because Eddie is nervous, then for a second because she was scared he was going to confess to a very ill-advised crush on her, is stumped. What the fuck is this about and why did it bring him to her of all people?
"Just say it you weirdo", is what decides to comes out of her mouth but it doesn't even matter because half of her sentence is layered with his "Are you aware Steve is in love with you?"
[here we're facing the issue of me not actually being a writer and pretty much running out of steam but we also haven't reached the part that sparked this whole thing yet, which is wild - let's just pretend I wrote a very funny dialogue between those two in which Eddie confronts Robin for stringing poor Steve along ]
There's a moment when they're both silent and there's a moment when they're both talking and then there are steps coming down the stairs. They make a smirk grow on Robin's face that is starting to worry Eddie when not a parental figure but Steve Harrington steps through the doorway. He's wearing sweatpants and a shirt that might be Robin's and there's a headband pushing his hair away from his face.
"Don't yell at me for coming downstairs, you took forever and the first layer... is... dry....", he stops in his tracks the moment he looks up from his bare toes and sees Eddie. Then he very quickly rips off the headband and slings it somewhere to his right into the unknown of the hallway.
"Hi Eddie. What's... up" Eddie is going to sink into the floor and never come up for air again.
In the meantime Robin stood up on the couch to sit cross-legged on the back of it for a better vantage point and is steepling her fingers in front of her face. Eddie is getting the distinct impression he's missing some crucial information here.
"Stevie, babe, platonic love of my life-", Steve nods for her to go on, "you know how we decided I get a veto on your romantic life because we realized droves of suboptimal dates actually make you miserable so we're going for quality over quanity for the first time in your small-town Casanova life?" Steve has that cute little crease between his eyebrows while he's looking back and forth between Eddie and Robin, trying to figure out what's going on but he rolls his eyes at the end of her sentence, back in familiar territory. "Yes, Robin-"
She interrupts: "And you know how I also reserved the right to give a shovel slash molotov cocktail talk to anyone we deemed worthy of being a potential future partner?" Steve's face somehow shows an emotion that can only be encapsulated by "?!" as he glances to Eddie before shifting back to Robin with just the "?" remaining.
"First I have to say I'm personally very pro, I loved this experience; Eddie here really made a fool of himself, very worried for your delicate sensibilities and how I'm breaking your sweet little heart." "...what...?"
"So: what's the verdict on a potential future partner giving me the shovel talk?"
#Robin had painted 7 of Steve toes when Eddie rang the doorbell btw#they're a dark blue because Steve didn't want to jump into the deep end with too feminine a color#but black felt too edgy#but while they were drying and on the way down he kept looking at them and thinking#''i don't think this is my color... maybe a light blue? no too baby boy. yellow? nah that's ugly. orange? wait maybe with a stripe?#can nails be striped...?'' so when he arrived downstairs he was starting to worry he had never looked at a girl's nails because he didn't#know and whether that was sexist somehow#he had to shift gears very quickly when he arrived downstairs is what i'm saying#anyway i cannot stress enough how much i am not a writer#but the thing with the reverse shovel talk came to me and it wanted out#platonic stobin#steddie fic#steddie#hey i'm talkin' here#robin buckley#steve harrington#eddie munson#not beta read#top posts
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i think the one thing that makes me feel the most autistic forever is Fashion. it's difficult to describe how, because i think i have a decent grasp on Character Design - like i have a sense for what *i* think looks cool!! and i'm sure i'm swayed by trends just as much as anyone, like i have a distinct memory of suddenly being Really Into Purple as a teen, and i thought it was just a thing i had discovered by myself but it was actually a year when purple was a really trendy color and they were selling cute purple clothes everywhere. i can rummage through my old clothes and recognise that wow, these pieces are heavily reminiscent of the early 2010s. sure!!!!
but when people talk about Fashion it's greek to me. 95% of the time i am presented with a picture of allegedly Bad Fashion i cannot understand what's wrong. we make fun of the way people dressed ten years ago but if ten years ago could aee how we dress today they'd be laughing at us?? and it's really so anxiety inducing to consider i might have zero self awareness about whether i dress ok or like a clown in other people's eyes, so i have no choice but to own it. my understanding of Dressing Good is finding pieces that are comfortable on your body and look flattering to you, whatever that might mean.
idk i just feel like an alien that can't understand earth language but i'm doing my very best to pick up on words as i go along
#PERSONALLY. i have no need to be fashionable#but. i need to be a professional adult man. and i'm frantically trying to find out how i dress the part#genuinely the thing i miss the most about being a Weird Girl in the 2010s was that i would put together absolutely bonkers experimental fits#without the stress of being perceived as the wrong gender...#sometimes i hear about a men's wear expert guy on twitter who dunks on shitty people for wearing the wrong color shoes#and i try to read his tweets to understand men's fashion a litle better......#except they make me understand Even Less#idk why i am suddenly so incensed by all this but i needed to write it out#me not understanding a bad outfit is the same as me not understanding a bad actor in movies#like a real person is dreasing/acting that way so it feels real and legit to me
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i've gone to sleep angry and woken up angry every day since last saturday
#the flatmate who moved out was made CRYSTAL clear of her contractual duties to keep paying rent until she's been replaced on the lease#just like the other flatmate who moved out (and flatmate B is a student who works part time and has a deadbeat dad she can't move home to)#flatmate A works full time and will be living at home rent free and only moved out to go on a free holiday to mexico with her sisters#but it's flatmate A who's throwing a tantrum saying she wants her bond back and wants to stop paying rent now#even though no one's moved in to replace her on the lease WHICH WAS THE STIPULATION OF HER BREAKING IT EARLY#she KNEW this and she avoided all attempts at conversation about it before she moved out#but now that we're not face to face she's so brave over text with her lawyer sisters in her ear trying to tell us we're fucking her over#and trying to get us to pay HER RENT on top of our own#it's a fixed term lease you can only break it if you abide by the conditions the landlord sets#and the conditions were that she find someone to replace her on the lease#she's claiming that bc flatmate c (who's staying in the flat) moved into her room out of his couples room (bc him and flatmate b broke up)#that that somehow counts as her being replaced on the lease#no matter how many times we tell her that's not the case because how the fuck could he replace her when he's already on the lease#she refuses to listen. IT'S A ONE IN OUT SYSTEM BABE AND YOU'RE STILL IN#it's just soooooo shitty and sneaky like we've been friends for three years and now she's throwing it all away for WHAT#i hate people pleasers i hate people who hide their selfishness and sneakiness behind smiley faces and kisses#how is it in ANY way fair that the rest of us pay her rent so she can go on holidays. yeah i'd fucking like that too girl#it's stressing me out so bad because she's trying so hard to get between us all and tell one person that the other person said something#and then you ask the other person and they say no i absolutely did not say that#and we have proof evidence and facts on her side but she refuses to believe them#anyways. we've referred this all on to our landlord now so now it's her problem and out of our hands#ugh. it just sucks because we were really close friends and now what are we
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My friend just made me download Airbuds how do I explain me listening to the entire Hamilton track
#I hate this app already#music is literally supposed to be my private time#this doesn’t feel so private#I feel so vulnerable rn#I hate it sm#like you don’t understand#I thought the question ‘who’s your favorite artist?’ was bad this is actually ten times worse#I’m actually going to freak out over this#does anyone know a way around this#urgently#help a girl out#but like actually#seriously#I’m not joking if you know please tell me#this is stressing me out so much wtf#I feel so restricted#tw anxiety#music#airbuds#who invented this app holy shit I’m gonna come for you#pjo#kotlc#yes I’m tagging that I need this to reach people urgently#i need to calm down#and touch some grass maybe#but in a minute#music is therapy#therapy is confidential#THERAPY IS CONFIDENTIAL LEAVE ME ALONE#Hamilton
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#spn#he is SHOCKINGLY good at communicating for someone who grew up with only john and dean winchester to look up to#like im so sorry you're trapped with him baby girl . ur stronger than me i wouldve screamed my head off at him several eps ago#which in dean's head would justify him behaving the way he has which would make me Certifiably Insane#this relationship makes me want to rip all my hair out lmao it's so stressful to watch#5.05
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The consequences of my poor financial decisions are here!!
#blame Kat for this lmao. she got the Yangchen novels first and I very easily give in to peer pressure (that wasn't exerted. but whatever)#three days earlier than scheduled too. which worked out perfectly bc I picked them up on the way home from grandma's#and carried them for 2 km. 2 hardcover books + the thick cardboard boxset they're in#+ the backpack full of food my grandma gave me#in the rain#I nearly fucking died#I'm not made for this level of physical exercise 😅#okay moving on#nia stop calling things like this poor financial decisions challenge#it cost like. the equivalent of 40 bucks#I have 30 times as much hidden away in my sock drawer#and I am usually responsible with my spending. I'm allowed a slightly more expensive treat every once in a while#also my dad doesn't know but I'm sure if I would him 'hey I spent 3.8k on a pair of books is that okay'#he'd be like 'why tf are you asking when have I ever said no to you spending money'#but again. I do try to be mindful#which is why as much as I want the lok art books and could probably ask for money for them. I won't#bc they cost an arm and a leg and I cannot morally allow myself to spend that kind of money#anyway. getting distracted again#do you know how hard it was to get these? I checked like 3 marketplaces before I did#and I was fully ready to get them in russian because non-classical english books are impossible to come by here#sanctions and all that. but somehow I did. and it only cost half the money in my bank account#I don't even know if Russian editions exist. these books were written before the war and before the gay propaganda ban but still#I didn't find them when I looked. maybe they don't sell them now that the law is in place or smth#I don't really care enough to look it up#the point is. I now own the books and can happily read about best girl kyoshi whenever I want#if the stress for an upcoming event doesn't kill me. that is#also I have read rok before but it was 3 years ago so my memory is vague. and I just realised how much thinner sok is?#I'll have to check the page count later
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((I need to jot this down because it keeps circulating in my head and BOY does it make me feel sad for Aigis! This is based off the OG FES The Answer content I’ve been watching, but considering some people may not have seen it yet, and are waiting for Reload’s DLC in a few weeks, I’ll keep this under a read more.
Aigis…cannot get rid of Orpheus. She can’t fuse it away, not because it’s locked or anything but because she can’t bear the thought of losing the protag’s initial Persona. In her eyes, it’d be the same as killing the protag themselves, and failing to protect them once again. Another reminder of the fact that the protagonist is dead. So she will keep harboring Orpheus throughout The Answer’s ordeal.
And from time to time, she’ll even talk to Orpheus as if she is talking TO the protag themselves. Since it’s the protag’s Persona, she seems to find some comfort and solace in being able to communicate with it, or at least know that there’s still a part of the protag now living inside her. This, in turn, really does no good for Aigis’ mental condition. She’ll step away from the group at times just to summon Orpheus, to ask the true leader about what she should do about their situation, to vent about everything that’s happened since the protag’s death, and PROFUSELY apologize for failing to protect them. And I’d like to think that Orpheus can provide some temporary comfort to Aigis during those times.))
#out of cards#mun stuff#Aigis#Aigis headcanon#((man it just makes me SO SO SAD HOW DEPRESSED AIGIS IS HERE!!#I feel for my girl so much this does NOT help anyone recover from the grief of losing a loved one#she has WAY TOO MUCH to deal with all at once and I feel like she’s going to get so overwhelmed and over stressed#btw apologies for the lack in posts I’ve been away for a few days but I should be home come tomorrow))
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was just making my morning cup of tea when my brain inexplicably dished up a long forgotten memory of what must be the most poorly thought out and cartoonishly offensive reality show ever produced (yes, even worse than milf island manor or whatever it’s called) and i had to google it to make sure it was actually real because frankly it seems like it should only be a wildly problematic fever dream.
but no, it was real.
it was called black. white. and it followed two real american families™ supposedly "swapping races" using hyper-realistic "makeup effects" and then going off to interact with society looking like rdj in tropic thunder and the wayans brothers in white chicks in order to "understand" racism and privilege (i mean presumably that was the point but yikes)
and this was not a show made in the 80's when you might expect some coked up executive to have thought it was a good idea, either. it was in fact made in 2006. and wikipedia is telling me that ice cube was one of the producers??
genuinely what were they thinking with this mess??????
#i don't even know how to tag this post honestly#the show was clearly trying to start some kind of dialogue *about* racism and privilege#but it somehow found the most racist way possible to do that#like the one episode i saw part of had the white teenage girl#in full blackface#like i cannot stress enough that she was in full blackface#going to a (predominantly black) slam poetry event#where she wanted to come clean about her true identity because she felt gross about lying#which really makes me wonder how much of a say she (or the teenage son of the black family) actually had in taking part#anyway i'll tag#racism#no idea what else to file this under 😬😬😬#also turning off reblogs because i’m sure it would take like a day for them to get out of hand#this post is really just me doing my best rod serling ‘’isn’t that fucked up?’’ impression
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i dont rly consider myself a spiritual person who places any particular value on manifestation or energy or fate or whatever. EXCEPT dreams. if you had a dream that gave you a weird feeling i am RIGHT THERE WITH YOU to take notes and analyze and i WILL be keeping an eye out for the rest of the week. trust 🙏
#my bf told me he had a dream i fell for a phishing scam last night and he told me this morning#and said it stressed him out so much he wanted to give me a crashcourse on it this weekend fjdkfkf#WHICH LIKE. MAYBE *YOU* WOULD FIND SILLY. BUT NOT ME. BC GUESS WHO GOT A LONG LOST RELATIVE PHISHING SCAM#NOT ONE HOUR AGO !!!!!! ME !!!!!!!#im also still riding the high of being 13 and having a 2 month period of extremely intense vivid dreams that all came true#in one way or another#sigh. girls when theyre a literal prophet but they left their purse at home and cant buy lunch at work :(
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