#getting over a little crush or whatever this is is just not worth losing what small bit of friendship we have going on

[rainnbepourin]

🤦🏻‍♀️

Me : *decides to get over a crush because the guy most likely has a girlfriend even though he's kind of flirty with me at work which my other coworkers have commented on and decides to cut all contact beyond the strictly professional stuff*

Also me : *sees him again in the office today after a week away and has a good time with him because he was all happy and smiley and cute and realizes I genuinely like this guy and regardless of any crush I just want to be friendly with him and being strictly professional in order to get over the crush is just not worth losing that*

Also me : *dresses nicely just to be as pretty as I can around him even though I've genuinely accepted the fact that it won't ever happen*

[sanakiras]

DISTRACTION

PAIRING — xu minghao x reader

WORD COUNT — 1.5k

SYNOPSIS — you can’t help staring at your best friends’s hands. when he pushes you to tell him why, things in your relationship take a turn.

TAGS — minghao in a suit, explicit sexual content, pure self-indulgence, porn with no plot, fem!reader

NOTE — there’s something sooo attractive about a man having long fingers. also i just have a crush on the8. no i will not elaborate. might delete this later bc i don’t like it. oh well. enjoy :o

lately, whenever being around your best friend, you’ve been... distracted.

for some reason, you’ve always liked it when men have long fingers. obviously the best known reason for that is a lewd one, but for you, it’s more than that. long fingers are hypnotizing to you.

of course it was minghao’s face that drew you in first. plump lips, eyes that could both kill and make you melt under their gaze, a strong jaw, dark hair often slicked back with a pair of sunglasses sitting on top.

then you noticed his figure. minghao is tall — long legs, long arms, long torso. what intrigued you about him was the control he has over it, alongside his flexibility. his movement is always swift, sharp and coordinated. not one to stumble over his own feet.

he became a close friend to you in no-time. within the first months of meeting him, you developed an admiration towards him, and that continued to grow into a crush you feel nothing if not insecure about.

because despite knowing him well, he’s far from an open book.

he’s not once given you the idea that he likes you the same way you like him, and now that he’s become such a good friend of yours, the last thing you’d want is to lose the friendship you’ve built with him.

so you keep it to yourself.

or, well, you try.

his current outfit makes that ridiculously hard. you’ve never seen him in a suit before.

while you weren’t all that excited for the black-tie event hosted by your faculty, just the sight of him has changed your mood like a whole day’s worth of caffeine.

and when he walks over to you, all you can do is admire him. the fabric suits his body like a glove, with several silver rings adorning his fingers and his frequently worn small hoop earrings to match them. the beautifully subtle black eye pencil brings out the colors of his eyes and styled hair.

“you look like a dream,” is the first thing to come out of his mouth when he steps before you, the tone of his voice as gentle as the smile he gives you.

heat rushes to your cheeks. “so do you. never expected to see you in a suit, but you clean up nice.”

he chuckles at your sarcasm. “thank you.”

as he tells you about — whatever it is, you honestly hardly remember a thing of the conversation — you suddenly come to the deafening conclusion that you’re nowhere near as subtle with your glances as you thought you were, which certainly bursts your bubble a bit.

“you keep doing that.” he muses, tilting his head as he looks at you with curiosity.

“what?”

“staring at my hands.”

“i’m not—i don’t stare.”

“what else would you call it? constant-looking?”

“hilarious. really.”

when you don’t say anything else, he purses his lips, hoping to get a little more out of you. you’ve got to give him credits for his determination. “so, what’s so interesting about my hands?”

with a simple shrug of your shoulders, you pretend to be casual, like he didn’t catch you staring at him. “they’re not interesting, just… nice.”

“nice?”

“can’t we just drop this? and by ‘we’ i mean you.”

he chuckles, shaking his head. “we’re friends. you can tell me, i won’t judge.”

“you? not judging anyone? that’d be almost suspicious.”

the retort makes him smile to the point it hurts his jaw. “i won’t judge you.”

a sigh rolls past your lips. “it’s no big deal, i just… like it when people have nice hands.”

“and why’s that?”

“does everything you like need to have a reason?”

"no, i guess not."

a playfulness that stirs doubt in you flashes behind his eyes, and you’re forced to put a halt to the conversation when one of your fellow faculty members walks up to the two of you with a glass of champagne, which you could not be happier with.

all you can do is hope minghao won’t bring up the topic again, the redness in your cheeks betraying you.

unfortunately, he does eventually bring it up again, once he’s gotten you home.

what his exact words were is difficult to remember, but now that he’s pushed you back onto your bed, you can’t find it in you to give a damn.

your brain feels foggy and a thin layer of sweat begins to form on your neck while he uses his hands to unbutton the white dress shirt, his impatience getting the best of him for once.

even though you’re busy pulling your top off, it’s hard to divert your gaze from his hands and chest, which brings him to tilt his head at you. “you’re staring again.”

“if you don’t want me to stare, don’t give me a reason to.”

“oh, so this whole thing is really just my fault?” he taunts, getting so annoyed with the damn buttons on his shirt not working with him that he leaves the bottom half like it already was, only the upper half of his chest peeking through.

once he lays his eyes on your half-naked form, you spot a growing desperation and impatience in his features, which is rare on him.

much to your surprise, he’s eager and quick, refusing to waste a single second. his hands have already pulled you towards him by your thighs before you can even comprehend it.

the thin silver necklace touches your warm skin when he leans down to kiss you, the last thing you’d imagined you’d be doing tonight — and it’s better than you anticipated.

he pries your legs open with a nudge of his knee, and just when you want to look down to his hand on your skin, he pushes two fingers into you, curling it upwards.

your hands immediately fly to his upper arms in response to the sudden intrusion, but it only makes you crave more.

his lips latch onto your cheeks, jaw and neck, placing wet kisses everywhere he can reach while his long fingers move in and out of you.

“just two and you’re already so tight — you can take another one, though, can’t you?”

how sweet of him to pose it as a question, an offer.

you both know damn well he’s gonna keep going either way.

minghao doesn’t know what it is about you that just utterly sets him off. it might be your constant pessimism, your snarky delivery of sarcastic little comments, the way you needlessly tease him all the time — or maybe it’s that whenever he sees you, he wants nothing more for you to get the fuck on top of him, moaning his name.

who knows.

“why don’t you just try me?” you ask rhetorically, accidentally clenching around his digits when he moves them again.

minghao chuckles, baffled that you’ve still got such an attitude, even when you’re at his mercy. he’d be lying if he said he didn’t like it, though. “right. maybe i should just do that.”

a third finger prodding into your hole makes you whine the loudest you have so far. he smirks a little when noticing the way you’re fighting so hard to maintain your composure, and the noise of your squelching wetness begins to become embarrassingly loud.

but it isn’t enough for him.

usually, it’s not at all like him to be insatiable or greedy. but all he can think of right now is that he wants more — to be closer with you, deeper.

he feels his own lust in every motion, every thrust of his fingers, every twitch of his cock. it makes him wonder if he’s ever wanted something, no, someone this badly.

his next move goes unnoticed by you since you’ve got your eyes closed and head back, but then you feel it, and it’s like you snap awake, an electric jolt making you jerk forward.

when you look down, he eagerly runs his tongue up and down your pussy, fingers remaining buried inside you.

“oh my god—” you stutter out, hand clutching onto the pillow but quickly moving down to grab his hair.

lost in your own pleasure, you push his head down, the lower half of his face coated in your arousal — fuck, he wants to do this for hours.

he proceeds to curl his fingers again, and he must’ve hit a good spot, because your legs are beginning to tremble, moans shorter and higher-pitched. “fuck, hao, it’s too much, i’m too close—”

“are you?” he rhetorically asks, pushing his digits as deep as possible, sucking on your clit, hollowing his cheeks. even when you try to close your legs, he firmly keeps them open.

your hips buck into his face when you cum, knees shaking, and he presses his thumb on your pussy, which makes your eyes roll back.

propping yourself up on your elbows, you suddenly feel his fingers slowly sliding out of you, and just that feeling alone already turns you on again. he sits across from you, still between your legs, and his fingers are completely coated in the sticky wetness that’s still dripping down your cunt.

he pushes them in his mouth, licking them clean, some of your arousal remaining on his lips.

“please say you’ll let me do that again.”

® SANAKIRAS — do not repost, remake or copy my work in any way whatsoever. translations are not allowed.

[mischieveousmayhem]

Hiiii I was wondering if I could request a Deku x reader and jealous ochako??

It goes where reader and deku are childhood besties like pinky promised to marry each other when they get older besties but reader had to move away to another country due to being accepted into one of the most prestigious quirk schools in the world (besides UA) and she ends up coming back to Japan during the UA sports festival and her and deku have a sweet reunion but ochako seems to be a bit jealous of reader and tries to make it obvious abt how she feels abt deku but in the end ultimately decides her jealousy isn’t worth losing her friendship over and deku and reader end up together :3

"Until we meet again.."

a/n: ok this took me a minute to figure out what i wanted to do but please enjoy! i did see the other part anon , where you requested what the quirk is, i just spiced it up a little! also please request guys im so uninspired till i see requests.

pairing: Izuku Midoriya x Fem! Reader , one sided Izuku Midoriya x Ochako

Warnings: Jealousy, Cursing, Making Ochako act slightly fannon and annoying, Reader moves to Getmaly

Genre: Fluff , maybe slightly angsty?

Synopsis: Y/N L/N finally returns to Japan where she can finally see her bestest friend. However, someone (Ochako) has a crush on her best friend, Izuku. When Ochako sees the two super close she tries to steal all of Izuku's attention away from the reader. But is it worth the loss of making her crush, but friend hate her?

Readers Quirk: Energy Absorbtation. User can absorb energy around them (ex. electricity, heat, etc.) and release powerful bolts of pink bolts. User also has laser eyes and can absorb enough energy to fly . (Basically Starfires powers but using energy to create the power). However the user must be super careful! Absorbing too much energy can make them have too much adrenaline and lose control and go manic!

—

"HEY!" A small voice boomed across the playground.

The ash blonde and his friends turned to see to see who was yelling at them. The green haired boy sunk more thinking it was just another person who would treat him the same as the ash blonde, Kastuki Bakugou and his friends were.

"Leave him alone! He didn't do anything to you."

Looking at the figure it was a girl, she had H/C pigtails and beautiful S/C toned skin. This made Bakugou smirk. Really? A girl tryna challenge the great Katsuki.

"Ooohhh I'm so scared , what is a little weak girl gonna do." He sarcastically remarked.

She smiled, "Weak? You call this weak?" There are pink bolts forming around her hand.

"Wowww so your a night light?" One of the ash blondes friends say.

"Hmm, no." She takes the bolts and pulverizes a nearby petite plant. The ash blonde and the rest of the bullies eyes widened, "Could be you next by the way." She said knowing that the plant was only turned to ashes for two reasons, it was a small plant and secondly, she didn't really know how to use her quirk that well so she absorbed a powerful bit.

Bakugou snaps out of it, "Yeah whatever, I'm not scared of you. We're just gonna leave cause we don't hang around useless nerds." Bakugou leaves while his "posse" follows behind him.

The girl walks up to the green-headed boy on the ground and reaches out a hand. He immediately takes it.

"Thanks for that..." He spoke shyly not knowing the girl who was seen as a stranger.

"No problem! Whats your name by the way?" She smiled.

"Izuku Midoriya."

"Cool name! I'm Y/N L/N"

"Nice to meet you L/N"

"Please just call me Y/N!"

From then on the two hung out more and more each day and they grew closer and closer. To the point where one day when they were playing house in Y/N's backyard a conversation came up.

Currently the two had stuffed animals and dolls as kids and Y/N smiled "I can't wait to have a life this growing up! It's so fun being married to you too!"

"Yeah it is fun. I want to have a life like this when I grow up to! Being a hero and having kids that look up to me would be a great life" Izuku smiled at her agreement.

"I have an idea, when we grow up, let's get married!" She exclaimed.

"Okay!" He says giving her a hug.

Once the hug breaks she holds out her pinky.

"Pinky promise?"

Their fingers lock.

"Pinky promise."

The two were super estatic to grow up and marry each other. However they ran into a road bump.

"Izuku..I'm sorry but I have to leave the country. I got an offer to go to a better school than U.A."

Those words rang into Izuku's ears everyday even to the present day. Everyday he missed her , everyday he wanted to see her face to face instead of just texting her or calling her. He missed her dearly. Y/N was like Izuku's oxygen. He felt it hard to breathe without her. However her going away didn't set him back from his journey to becoming number one hero. In fact, it pushed him harder.

This takes us to present day, the day Y/N gets to come home. Although it is not permanent, Izuku is very happy she is coming back home even if it's just for the festival. Sure all his friends were nice at U.A. Especially Ochako. She considered Izuku her best friend, but he didn't consider his. Y/N would always be his best friend no matter what.

They haven't been separated that long either it's been like what? A year? Maybe a little less? Either way he was just happy he was going to her again. And again was today.

Waiting at the bus stop for her to get off, Ochako stood next to him, more like against him, she gave him like zero personal space. They were gonna walk with Y/N to U.A since she must not be familiar with Japan anymore.

"Soo who are we waiting for?" Ochako started conversation.

"My childhood best friend." Izuku says.

Ochako questions, "Oh really? Did they not pass the exam go get into U.A?"

"Actually that's not it at all. She got an offer to take an exam at a much more prestigious school and she passed. She is one of the top students in her class." Izuku explains.

She? His best friend was a she? This made Ochakos stomach turn into knots. She has had a crush on Izuku for a while but he knew his so called childhood best friend longer. What if he liked his childhood best friend instead of Ochako? Is that why he ignores all her small hints? Or maybe the boy is just oblivious as hell.

Snapping her out of her thoughts, the bus pulled up and there came a beautiful S/C toned girl who stepped off smiling as wide as possible.

Izuku didn't even almost notice her! She had changed so much. Her hair had pink highlights, the same shade as her energy bolts along with puberty hitting her like a bus, and not just her body, but her face matured. The only thing that made Izuku sure it was her was that wide smile and her glimmering E/C eyes.

"Izuku!" She jumped and embraced him. Before he could even embrace her back they started flying in the air in circles. After 5 seconds of spinning Y/N made sure both their feet touched the ground.

Ochako just stood there awkwardly watching this entire interaction. However her awkward stance is what was hiding that boiling feeling inside her.

"You can fly now?!" Izuku exclaimed at Y/N.

"Yeah! Training really does help you explore what else you can do with your powers." She smiled. "I can't wait to see your awesome quirk today at the festival."

She knew Izuku got a quirk , however she didn't know the backstory on how or why he got it so late. She didn't even bother to ask because the boy was happy and she wouldn't dare ask unless he offered to tell her.

"I'm gonna try my best to win." He says before turning to the awkward Ochako.

"Oh Uraraka, this is my best friend I was telling you about! This is Y/N and Y/N, this is Uraraka." He introduced the two.

Y/N stuck out her hand in front of Uraraka to shake it, "Nice to meet you, by the way you're like soo pretty."

Ochako shook Y/N's hand, "Nice to meet you too, and thanks." She said, but you could hear the slight bitterness in Ochako's voice.

The three walked to U.A together, mainly Izuku and Y/N talking and laughing while Ochako trailed behind them, like a third wheel. This wasn't fair. When Y/N wasn't here Izuku would be talking and laughing with her not Y/N. She would just have to get Izuku's attention some way.

—

Before the festival started Izuku and Y/N shared on more conversation.

"Woww , it must be fun to be able to compete! In Germany we can't compete in festivals till we're second years." Y/N explained.

"I wish so too, I would love to try to compete against you so I can show you how I can beat you with my quirk." He said pumping a fist up.

"And may she might, young students!" All Might appeared out of no where behind the two. The voice startled Y/N but when she turned around she saw All Might.

"Oh my stars! It's All Might!! Wait what do you mean?" She titled her head.

"I have heard about you , L/N. You and your fellow students were in a magazine a while ago." He explained, while Y/N's eyes lit up. "I can speak and have it arranged for you to join us in our festival. I want to see you at work."

"Oh my stars! Really?! Like really , really?!" Y/N was so happy right now she looked like she was gonna pee herself.

"I can try. Now wait for me outside in the hall while I speak to this young student." All Might says as Y/N obeys and closes the door on the way out.

All Might shrinks back down to regular old Toshi. He coughs before speaking.

"Does she know?"

"No, I didn't tell her."

"Good , I was afraid you would tell her especially since she doesn't go here." Toshi says, weakness in his voice. "I'm going to go take her to talk to the other pros in charge to see if we can get her to join the festival. I know you will do good Midoriya." He places a hand on Izuku's shoulder before going back to being All Might.

Before leaving he turns around and says, "Good luck."

—

Y/N hummed as she changed in the locker room. Ochako so happened to be there getting prepared. When Ochako spots her she immediately tries to avoid Y/N however Y/N's attention was somewhere else. She was just too excited for this opportunity.

When Ochako realized Y/N wasn't paying attention she stared at Y/N. Damn, she wouldn't blame Izuku if he did like Y/N. Y/N was beautiful and she looked so much better in the gym uniform then Ochako.

Y/N wore a sports bra only under the uniform because she wasn't prepared for this. Ochako saw this and thought she should do the same so Ochako took off her tank top and left her sports bra on with just the gym uniform on top.

Y/N turns, "Oh Uraraka! Guess what they're letting me compete in the festival." She smiled.

"Oh. I am happy for you. I hope you do well."

"You too! May the best one win." Y/N smiles friendly before leaving.

"Yeah may the best one win.." Ochako mutters knowing that she didn't want to just win the festival she also wanted to win Izuku's love and attention.

—

The festival contained of many challenges.

The first one was the obstacle course. Y/N ended up passing at number 15. That was only because she didn't use flight for it. She used her pure skills.

Next was the calvary battle. Y/N ended up being placed on team Todoroki. She was having so much fun she barely noticed it was a challenge.

Finally , it was one on ones. Y/N won her first round against Mina and she was super pleased by it. She didn't think she was that good with her quirk. But she had an advantage against Mina's acid. Acid is a chemical, and chemicals have energy.

It was time for Uraraka and Bakugou to fight and Uraraka was nevous before she went on so she went to Izuku.

But before she did she unzipped her uniform to show off her sports bra and then confronted him unfortunately Y/N was there.

"Oh Midoriya!" She exclaimed interrupting what Y/N and Izuku were talking about. "I have to fight Bakugou and I'm so gonna lose" She said almost in an almost too dramatic way.

"Let me help you come up with a pla–" Izuku tried to speak.

"I don't need your help with winning, I want to do this on my own. I know I can do it." Ochako say, "I'm just so nervous, can I have a hug before I go on?" She asks with pleading eyes.

Izuku and Ochako embrace for a solid 10 seconds before Y/N joins in. Then the unwanted group hug only lasts about 5 seconds.

"You're gonna do great Ochako! Bakugou just has a bigggggggg ego since forever. You're gonna win." Y/N smiled.

"Yeah, you are Ochako!" Izuku agrees.

"Thanks guys..." The "guy" thats came out her mouth was super bitter and she stared daggers at Y/N while she said it. However Y/N thought it was on accident so she smiled.

That almost frustrated Ochako past her limits. But made her think why is Y/N being so nice? Why can't Y/N back off OCHAKOS Izuku? Whatever it didn't matter.

Ochako hugged Izuku one more time before going to her battle. As she walked off she thought that if she did well it would impress Izuku and he will fall in love. Maybe she's being delusional but she won't give up on him.

Y/N and Izuku watched the painful battle of Ochako vs Bakugou. They were both putting on a strong fight but Bakugou was obviously winning.

"She needs to forfeit or she's gonna get seriously injured, Izuku."

"She's gonn—" He's cut off when Ochako hits the ground.

Y/N gasps and Izuku's eyes widen.

Midnight declares Ochako is unconscious, however leading Y/N and Izuku rushing down to recovery girl.

A few moments later Ochako's eyes fluttered open. She saw Y/N and Izuku next to her.

"Shes awake!" Y/N exclaimed. "Are you okay?"

Ochako stared blankly. Why was Y/N here? But she knew Izuku was here so she put on a little act, "Oh my..I'm in so much pain right now." She wasn't seriously lying, Recovery Girl can't fully help Ochako recover.

"You put on a good fight Uraraka! It's nice to see you awake however, I have to prepare to fight Todoroki in a little. I'll catch you guys later!" Izuku hugged Ochako and she became slightly flustered before he left the room.

Sitting down in a chair next to Uraraka, Y/N speaks, "That fight was so impressive! I could see your strategy. I wish you won it would have been so badass for you to beat Bakugou."

While Y/N kept complimenting Ochako and talking about the fight. Ochako realized something. Ever since Y/N came back she's just been jealous of her. When in reality she shouldn't have. Y/N has no bad intentions towards her, she just wants to be her friend. Imagine if Izuku knew what she thought of Y/N? He would hate her guts.

Realization.

"And the way you used your jacket for a—" Y/N was cut off by Ochako,

"Do you like Midoriya?" Ochako asks.

"Yes, he's my best—"

"I mean do you like him?" She exaggerates the like this time.

Y/N stops and thinks before answering.

"... It doesn't matter, I don't think he feels the same." The answer came out her mouth almost too quietly, but Ochako heard it.

"L/N," Ochako sat up, wincing from the little pain she had left and grabbing Y/N's hand. "The way he looks at you, the way he interacts with you, every time he interacts with you it's different from others. He doesn't just like you, I'm sure he loves you. You're the love of his life, you should tell him."

Y/N is speechless, "But don't you like him?"

"How'd you know?!?" Ochako becomes flustered.

"It's obvious."

"Then it's also obvious he doesn't like me back."

Y/N got up and helped Ochako get up. "I know you like him, but I don't want to get with him if you lik—"

"Please, who cares if I like him, I want him to be happy and he's obviously happy with you. So let's go watch him kick ass." Ochako smiled hooking her arms with Y/N's as they went to go watch Midoriya vs Todoroki.

—

"Aww you did so well , though." Ochako spoke, where Ochako, Y/N, and Izuku were all back with Recovery Girl.

"I agree." Y/N smiled.

"Thanks guys, I'm disappointed though."

"Next year, you're going to beat him for sure." Ochako says.

"Same goes for you beating Bakugou."

"Speaking of Bakugou," Y/N chimes in, "I'll avenge you right now. Cause guess who has to fight him."

The two stared at Y/N.

"He's super strong though." Midoriya spoke up.

"He may be strong but I'm sure I'm stronger." Y/N smiled.

"You got this girlie! If anyone can beat him it's you." Ochako smiled optimistically, and this time there was no bitterness.

—

Y/N stood in the ring across from Bakugou.

"We meet again Katsuki." Y/N smiles.

"Don't call me that."

"Hmm, I'll call you whatever I want after I beat you." Y/N smiles.

"The hell? You'll never beat me."

"Wanna bet?"

"Damn right, I do."

Y/N giggles, "I'll go easyy.."

Bakugou had enough of the talk he sent the first explosion towards her. Using acrobatic skills, she flipped out the way dodging the attack.

"Damn, thats all you got?"

"Fuck no."

Y/N flew up throwing bolts at Bakugou.

The two were fighting for a good 15 minutes. The area was smoky from not only Bakugou's explosions but Y/N's bolts and laser eyes.

Unfortunately, Y/N was beat by Katsuki by default because she absorbed too much energy and went manic.

—

When everyone recovered and everyone recovered it was time for Y/N to go home. Izuku was sad and so was Y/N. They didn't know the next time they would see each other and this made them both upset.

It was rainy, and they both stood under an umbrella waiting for the bus to take Y/N to the airport.

"You did awesome at the festival." She broke the silence.

"So did you." He spoke , but there was sadness in his voice.

"You know, I'm really proud of you and your quirk is amazing. I can't wait to see how hard you train and how good you are next time I see you." She smiled almost sadly, "And then I'll fight your that time."

He chuckles, "I hope you don't think you're gonna win."

"Trust me, I will."

The bus pulled up and the two looked even more sad.

"I guess this is it for who knows how long." Izuku turns and faces her.

"Don't be sad, Izuku. Our separation is only temporary. Remember, I'll come back and we will get married?" She cuffs his cheek.

He lit up a little, not thinking she remembered the promise. He melted into the touch of her hand while nodding.

They shared one last embrace,

"Goodbye, Y/N."

"Until we meet again, Izu."

The embrace broke but Y/N didn't walk off yet. What did was totally unexpected. She pecked his lips and ran on to the bus, "Call me later!"

Those were the last words he heard her say before he stood there flustered.

They wouldn't just marry each other in the future because they were best friends.

Izuku Midoriya found his true love, his soulmate, and he can't wait to see her again.

[xo-cod]

Hi Lia! I was wondering if you could write something with Simon? I love the way you write him :) Maybe something with his nightmare and he needs the reader? 🤗

ah thank you baby! <33 i saw nightmare and just kinda wrote whatever :")

it might be ooc but i tried 😩 hope you enjoy! 🤍

anchor

it was just past 2am when simon woke up in cold sweats. gasps flying out of his mouth, his hands tangled in the bed sheets, perspiration glistening on his skin. they were getting bad again, the nightmares were becoming more consistent, more realistic and usually he would've been able to deal with them by himself.

it was just a bad dream, he tried to calm himself down but it doesn't work like usual. he's too panicked to think properly, no, he needs something.

someone

in his frenzied state however, simon doesn't feel you beside him and the familiar lump crawls to his throat. no, he couldn't have been imagining all those sweet memories could he?

had you left him, figuring his baggage was not worth staying around for? had someone taken you, killing you in the same brutal way his mother and his brother had been taken? did he imagine all those cherished moments he held so near and dear to his heart? every horrible situation his mind could possibly conjure up runs through his head and simon has no choice but to let each one play out. the tears were getting harder to hold back now, his head was in his hands begging his mind to stop.

before he could even hoarsely call out your name, you had turned in your sleep right next to him. relief practically floods in his veins and he dives closer to you with shuttered breaths. the tears were falling freely, like a barricade had broken inside of him.

"y/n, oh my lovie-" he babbled out snuggling deep into your neck, trying to calm his racing heart. usually he would never disrupt you but tonight he's not himself. his mind was cruel, unsure of what was real and what isn't. everything was unravelling and he begins to feel himself become undone along with it.

but all he knew, with surety lodged deep in his heart, was that you were his anchor in this turbulent treacherous sea. you were the thing keeping him grounded no matter where he was

you awoke in slight shock, confused on the pressure around your body. but the sleep disappears when you see the behemoth that was your boyfriend wrapped so tightly around you like a lifeline. it's not like him to be so terrified, to be so vulnerable and you worry for a second if something terrible had happen. but you take a breath, holding him as close as you can.

a nightmare, you deduce.

"bad dream?" you mumble into his soft hair, gently stroking his face. you feel his tears fall against your chest and it breaks your heart piece by piece. he nods into you and you give a kiss to his head, leaning a little back so you could see him clearly.

he's like a little boy in your arms and you want to hold him so tight until nothing bad could ever hurt him again. you didn't know the true extent of his pain, he hadn't told you everything but you knew it whatever it was completely had destroyed him.

"i-i'm sorry, i-" he wipes his eyes with the back of his hand, cursing at himself to have it together. these dreams never usually affected him this much and he was always good at having his feelings under control but tonight it was brutal.

he could feel your lifeless body, how his throat was raw screaming your name over and over, the tears that burned and blurred his vision, the crushing weight of losing you like everything good in his life had to come to an abrupt end.

you hold his sweet face between your hands, pressing your lips to his forehead for a tender kiss. the soft pads of your thumbs sweep the apples of his cheeks, a reassuring a smile pulled on your lips.

"go back to sleep, si. i'll be here. i'll always be here" you promised softly, laying the two of you back down on the bed again. he doesn't have the energy to say a word, his silence is all the answer you need. so he sleeps securely in your arms, the exhaustion taking him and you hold him close. running your fingers in his hair, your heartbeat a steady reminder in his ears that you were well and truly okay.

while he fought the demons during the day, you did your part and keep them well away at night

[bugsbia]

Wanderer having a fat crush on gender neutral reader

BEFORE READING: okay this is just some 6am fluff, I haven’t slept at all and just wanted to ramble about scara being soft so this won’t be very well written, but it’s not horrid.🩷

just fluff, big time fluff

You came into his life unexpectedly, incredibly unexpectedly since he never really intended to form any close bonds anytime soon for the fear of abandonment still lingered within his heart. He couldn’t help it though, something about you just grabbed his attention and intrigued him. He didn’t even truly understand his own feeling at first, a crush wasn’t exactly something he’d had yet in his 500 years of life.

You didn’t jump at the chance to talk to him at first since he had quite the reputation for being cold and distant, but he slowly made is way into your life. Coincidently finding you in the library as you studied and offering to help, he’s awfully smart for a man who looks no older than 23. It amazed you to a degree, but it also came off as a little obnoxious, he would definitely cut you off with an “Uhm actually”.

You two sort of became friends after these little study sessions happened a few times, waving and saying hi whenever you’d cross paths, sometimes he’d even give you food under the pretence of “having cooked too much” when in reality he just wanted to cool something up for you. He liked the way you’d look so happy to have a nice meal during your studies, it was a joy he never truly got to experience and seeing you get to experience it felt as if it was healing his heart a little.

He slowly began to touch you, not in a weird way, just small gestures. Hands brushing against eachother, light pats on the back or putting a hand on your shoulder as he watched over your shoulder at whatever task you were up-to. He began holding onto your hand to take you places, playing it off as simply not wanting to lose you in such a busy city such a sumeru. I’m reality he just liked the way it felt, the way your hands so easily fit together, how your fingers intertwined. You didn’t seem to mind it either, so he never stopped, but he would have if you asked him too.

You both grew accustomed to these touches, your hands remaining intertwined long beyond what was truly needed, he’d let his hand linger sometimes at the small or your back whenever you’d be stand by each-others side. At some point during this you realised your growing feelings for him, the way your heart would flutter and stomach would knot when you felt his hand on you, the way you’d feel a little giddy when he held onto your hand. It also made you feel special, this man was known by students of the academia for being a no non-sense person who rarely even paid attention to anyone, but he was here with you, showing you these affections that would have students spitting out their drinks.

He tried to hide his adoration for you behind a thin lie, saying he was merely being nice and only doing these things because you so clearly liked it. He knew the truth though, he was just scared to admit it, worried you’d run for the hills, disappear the way those of his past did if you found out he truly adored you, the way you smiled, the way you laughed, everything about you. He didn’t want to risk the friendship.

He would often go to Nahida for advice for you, grumbling and mumbling over how he didn’t know what to do, and he was so very confused. She would promote him to confess to you, seeing it as a good step in the right direction. If you rejected him then he’d learn to handle rejection, it was a good exercise for him and after weeks and months worth of discussion with Nahida he finally did it.

It wasn’t anything big, he isn’t the kind of guy to go all the way out for a confession. It was simple, you two were together in the library again, studying the way you did when you first met, he startled you for a moment when he said your name in such a serious, you panicked for a moment. Worrying if you’d hurt him, if something had gone wrong, but your nerves instantly calmed when he quietly grumbled that he liked you. He tried to make himself feel better by playing up his sarcastic persona, acting as if this was no big deal to him, but the vulnerability in his eyes told you everything.

Especially when you told him you felt the same, the looked shock for a short moment before quickly trying to cover it up, acting all confident like he knew you’d like him because he was just so cool. All a silly facade to try cover up the adoration he felt for you, you knew it was just a facade though with the way he smiled to himself and the light blush upon his cheeks. How adorable he was, and now he was your boyfriend.

[longtallglasses]

“I’m gay,” he blurts out suddenly, because if this is how his life is going and he’s gonna die in the next 12 hours he at least needs to let Mike know that.

“What?!” Mike whips around so hard he almost loses all balance and falls to the ground. He catches himself thankfully right before he does.

“I’m gay,” Will says again when Mike is in front of him. Mike’s eyes widen and his mouth falls open just a bit. Will doesn’t feel any emotion to his confession at all, it’s not news to him obviously, but whenever he imagined finally telling this to Mike he thought it would feel so dramatic. That it would feel like he was ripping open a part of himself, but given everything it feels like he’s just letting Mike know what his star sign is.

Mike however looks like he’s gonna have an aneurysm. He’s short circuited. He’s dumbfounded. Will is honestly a little surprised this is so shocking to him like did he never even consider-

“Uh-.. uh I know.” Mike stumbles on his words like bambi.

Wait what?

“What do you mean you know?”

“Uh, that I know… I know you’re- you’re gay.” Mike stammers out like he’s never said the word in his life.

“Did Lucas tell you?” Will accuses. He doesn’t want to think about the state that Lucas must be in but if he told Mike anything…

“No! Wait, Lucas knows?”

“Yeah, I told him. How do you know?”

“Well, I..” Mike struggles, “I just assumed… No! Not that I assumed, I just inferred.” Mike rubs a hand over his face, “Well, you know, I figured it out, kind of… like I just realized you didn’t really like girls, which is okay! I mean I get it girls are whatever… but then you know how obsessed you were with George Michael… well I just put two and two together and-”

“Ok, Ok,” Will stops him there, “how long have you known then?”

“I don’t know.. Um, like since last year?”

Will lets out an internal sigh of relief. Ok, he can work with that. He would’ve thought it was earlier given when Mike had started to stand farther and farther away from him, this trip excluded for obvious reasons.

“And you’re cool with it?” I mean he has to be at least pretty cool with it if he’s with him here right now.

“Of course! Of course I’m cool with it, I lo- I- I, you’re- you’re perfect.” Mike settles on and Will sees the look of strained cringe Mike just can’t disguise, and he can’t help but laugh at how utterly ridiculous and pathetic his best friend is.

Mike chuckles at himself too. Sheepishly running a hand through his hair. “Sorry, you know what I mean..”

Will forces himself to not laugh in his face any longer, at least they can still do this. He might be dying soon and a ghost of a witch might be after them and their friends, but this can still feel nice.

“Yeah I do, it’s okay. You’re perfect too.” He still blushes as he says it even if it's supposed to be half a joke. The huge megawatt smile that blooms across Mike’s face after he says it is pretty worth it though.

Mike tries to tamper it down by looking away and clearing his throat, but he’s not too successful, so Will helps him out.

“Let’s, uh, let’s get this stuff up,” he says to break the moment, and Mike is happy to spring to action to not talk about this anymore.

from my blair witch project wip mostly spoiler free lol things are getting spooky but you gotta come out to your crush before you die...

[carlsdarling]

Could you write something where carl has always been super in love with the reader but she only starts paying attention to him after Beth’s death also can you include some smut once they get to Alexandria?

New friends & benefits

After losing your best friend Beth, you and Carl finally get closer and you show him your affection... Bit more of a plot, then sex. Everyone is 18 or over.

WARNINGS: smut, nsfw, oral (male receiving)

Beth had been your best friend, you literally shared everything; you had been inseparable - especially during your time in prison. Your cells were next to each other, and you stayed up late chatting together. Sometimes you told each other creepy stories, or you played cards, you put make-up on each other and did each other's hair.

Carl kept trying to join you, but you always sent him away. Sometimes you were pretty mean to him, but he got on your nerves. He was a little younger than the two of you, and you didn't know what to do with him. Plus, he was always gawking at you and peeping at you, whatever you were doing.

Beth often made fun of that. "Carl has a crush on you, Y/N. He literally adores you," she giggled. She was probably right about that, but it wasn't something you were proud of.

Then the day came when the prison fell, Hershel died, and you fled to all points of the compass. Not only had Beth and you been lost to each other; you found yourself completely alone in the wilderness, fleeing from a pack of walkers that the Governor had let loose before he died.

For weeks you wandered around, lonely, starving and thirsty; you were not used to being alone. Shortly after the apocalypse started, you had ended up on Hershel's farm, following the death of your parents, and he had taken you in. The farm had been a relatively sheltered place. And now he was dead, and you had no idea where Beth had ended up. Or the others.

Finally, Daryl and Carol found you on the bank of a river, and you fell weeping into Carol's arms. You learned from Daryl that he had been with Beth for a while until she disappeared. Kidnapped. That's what he said, anyway. They were going to free her.

And then the horrible thing happened. Beth was killed, shot to death. You were paralyzed with grief when Carol told you, and you didn't really realize that you had found Rick's group again. You and Maggie shared your sorrow and your loss, you missed Beth and Hershel so terribly, and for a long time you shut yourself off from everyone else.

One evening, when Maggie was already asleep, you were sitting by the campfire, and Carl surprisingly joined you. You looked at him in amazement. It had been perhaps half a year since you had been separated, but you hardly recognized him. He had grown so much, tall and lanky he had become, and he had developed some beard growth. "I'm so sorry about Beth, Y/N," he said sympathetically, putting his hand on your shoulder. "I liked her, too. Even though you two never liked me." He laughed humorlessly.

"That's hardly true, Carl," you replied, "Thank you. It's just... you were so young. How old are you again?"

"Seventeen," he replied, tossing a branch into the fire. "No longer a child," he pointed out, eyeing you. When you didn't respond, he said goodbye and went to sleep.

One year later

A lot had happened in the interim. You had gotten to Alexandria, and Carl and you had become close buddies. You were really starting to like him. Then Carl lost his eye and tried to push you away; he withdrew from everyone, but you wouldn't let him throw away your friendship and persisted in seeking his company, even though he kept saying mean things to force you away. "I've already lost Beth," you said heatedly, picking up the plate and the ham sandwich. Carl had slammed both against the wall and yelled for you to leave, that he didn't want you around. "I'm not going to lose you, too, Carl. No way," you vowed.

"Look at me, Y/N!" he yelled. "I look terrible! I'm not worth it!" The bullet wound hadn't completely healed and his bandage was still a little bloody.

"How can you say such a thing?" you said, affected. "I don't give a damn what you look like. You are, and will always be, my best friend. Period."

Carl sadly fiddled with a pillow. "And... and what if I still want to be more than besties?" he mumbled, barely audible, avoiding eye contact with you. "You know I've always had a little bit of a crush on you."

You held your breath. Several times over the last few months you had imagined that there could be more between you and Carl, you never thought it possible, but you had fallen a tad in love with him, which embarrassed you, especially because you had rejected him for years. So you didn’t admit it to him, and you also thought he had lost interest in you. He seemed to get along well with Enid, too well. Carl‘s accident didn't change your feelings at all, you only cared about him even more. "I'd be happy about that, Carl," you said, gathering all your courage.

He stared at you. Carl possessed such beautiful eyes - or, rather, a beautiful eye. "Are you kidding me? Before the accident you didn't want to be with me, why now? I do not believe you.“

You decided to prove it to him, and just pressed your lips to his. He flinched, taken aback, but then awkwardly returned the kiss. You embraced each other and continued your caresses. You were careful not to hurt Carl or touch the bandage. Carl was all tense from all the stress and suffering, his neck muscles felt rock hard. "Lie down on your back," you whispered in his ear, gently kissing his neck.

"What are you up to?" he wondered, but obeyed.

"Just let me do it. Relax," you commanded, shoving his shirt up a little and starting to kiss his stomach. Carl gasped excitedly. You played with his belly button with your tongue and licked along the line of soft dark hair leading way down, then undid his belt and jeans. Carl was already hard, and whimpering with arousal, he squirmed under you. "Lift your hips," you said, and he did, and you pulled his jeans and boxers down so that his cock was exposed. "Not bad, it's bigger than I thought," you teased, taking him in your hand and kissing the already slightly wet, reddened tip before sliding his shaft into your mouth. You massaged it with your lips and sucked gently on it, and Carl almost lost his mind. He moaned, thrusted vigorously into your mouth and tugged on your hair.

"I've dreamed of this for so long, Y/N," he confessed, tossing his head back and forth on the pillow, his eye closed. Tenderly you continued to suck Carl off. After a short while, he became fidgety. "I, I think I, I'm about to cum," he stuttered nervously. „Where? Y/N, I…“ Apparently he was apprehensive about cumming in your mouth.

"It's okay, Carl," you assured him, kissing him on the lips. "Just let go. Let yourself go." Again you took his dick in your mouth and sucked and licked on it, Carl was beyond close, he just sighed and whimpered, then his cum filled your mouth. A load squirted, then a second one and a third. You swallowed it all and waited until Carl was finally done with his load before you let his now softened cock slip out of your mouth, licking him clean and lay down next to him.

Carl snuggled up to you, his pants still pulled down, he was all sweaty and sticky. He glanced at you in love. "I didn't know you felt that way about me, Y/N," he whispered hoarsely.

"Yes, I do," you clarified, tugging the blanket over both of you and playing with Carl’s hair.

[monstersinthecosmos]

Marius considers Armand the main mistake of his life

Do you think he would turn him into a vampire again if he could go back in time?

!!!!!!!!!! the easy answer to this is yes of course because he's a person trapped in a cycle who makes the same mistakes over and over 😂

but! the deeper answer here is that I don't agree that Marius considers Armand a mistake!!!!!!!!!

I think he regrets the way Armand was turned and regrets that he didn't take care of Santino when he had the chance. I think he spent 500 years feeling like he failed Armand, and so the content of the actual mistake is not Armand himself, but the circumstances around him and wishing things had been different in Venice.

This is the part in TVL where Marius says he fucked up with Armand -

"Whatever will happen will happen, but choose your companions with care. Choose them because you like to look at them and you like the sound of their voices, and they have profound secrets in them that you wish to know. In other words, choose them because you love them. Otherwise you will not be able to bear their company for very long. "

"I understand, " I said. "Make them in love. "

"Exactly, make them in love. And make certain they have had some lifetime before you make them; and never never make one as young as Armand. That is the worst crime I have ever committed against my own kind, the taking of the young boy child Armand. "

"But you didn't know the Children of Darkness would come when they did, and separate him from you. "

"No. But still, I should have waited. It was loneliness that drove me to it. And Armand's helplessness, that his mortal life was so completely in my hands. Remember, beware of that power, and the power you have over those who are dying. Loneliness in us, and that sense of power, can be as strong as the thirst for blood. “

So like obviously AR retconned Armand's backstory a bit over time, like this version of events doesn't say Marius did it because Armand got stabbed and was dying lol, but I think there's still a throughline between this and TVA and B&G about how Marius was trying to wait, and in waiting kept changing his mind until his hand was forced.

And don't forget that during the Venice era he was also painfully in love with both Botticelli and Bianca, and he used Armand as a rebound from them. He was going off of Eudoxia's advice to pick someone he could groom for vampirism, and he picked a traumatized teenager who could be a blank slate.

He changed his mind almost immediately though! He loved Armand! He knew he couldn't do this to him, but also began to realize he'd sort of ruined Armand for regular life anyway, and it was inevitable!

So I think like, in any version of events, or if he had the chance to do things differently, the common denominator of crushing loneliness would push him to it anyway, and he loved Armand anyway. He wanted to keep Armand. I just wonder if he'd try to prepare him better and let him live longer, and take care of the coven so that they wouldn't ruin Armand's life.

And the thing about time loops & time travel that we see in storytelling all the time is that things are sometimes inevitable. Like, Marius can go back in time and try to keep Armand from dating Harlech, but he can't do anything about it during the day, and Armand is going to do it anyway. Armand isn't going to listen!

And when I think about what parts of Armand's personality are innate and what's The Trauma it's like, we talk all the time about how they're immortal and have all the time in the world to heal, so who's to say that Armand won't be okay one day! And would the Marius of 2112 risk a change like this if Armand is happy and okay and their relationship is good?

Because even if he waited and turned Armand a little older and they had more time together, and eventually get to a good place, is it worth the risk to lose the GOOD things they've built together, or that have happened because of Armand? Like without Armand, would Marius have Daniel? Would he even have Lestat? Would he have ever been freed from TWMBK?

There's a fluffy version of time travel where you go back and fix something and everything is okay LOL so we ultimately come back to the classic topic of Marius loving selfishly vs selflessly--would he ever decide his loneliness is worth the 300 years of pain that Armand went through? Or are we dealing with the type of time travel that says some things are inevitable, and the lesson of the story is that you can't change it without losing something?

And how would ARMAND even feel about it? Armand takes his immortality like a champ and while he has big cosmic feelings about it sometimes, he doesn't complain. He feels love. He still fears death like everyone else. Is this a risk he'd even consent to? Would he turn in his own damnation for death? Is his death, and the gift of being freed from a curse worth missing out on his love of Lestat and Louis and Daniel and Benji & Sybelle?

THERE'S JUST SO MANY WAYS IT COULD GO WRONG LIKE IS IT EVEN WORTH IT IDK

JUST THE BRIEFEST OVERVIEW WITH A FEW SIMPLE OPTIONS, THIS HAS INFINITE SPACE TO GROW TBH

I love time travel as a topic LMAO I keep daydreaming about ways to write time travel VC fic!!!!! I love it for Sheith fandom but it's easier to incorporate because it's sci-fi. But I think as a storytelling vehicle it always tries to tell us to stick with the devil we know. I think I'm getting carried away with my nerd topic and straying from your question LMAO but this is how I'm pondering.

I'd also ask if SANTINO would do things differently. If he'd leave Armand alone!!!!!!!!! And I'll stop here because, like I said, the space on the chart is infinite and you could talk all day because what if Santino hadn't acted like a cunt, what if Marius didn't feel that TWMBK were threatened by cults, what if there had been even the slightest peace in the vampire community where Marius didn't have to feel like the sole keeper, how different would his life have been, would he have even still needed Armand, etc etc etc etc

So yeah I think he'd do it again. :)

And I mean.

He turned Benji.

Soooooooooooooo idk if he learned a lesson about turning children. SHRUG.

[heliads]

Hey hun, just wondering if I could get a Theo Raeken x Hale!reader basically he's an overprotective brother ❤️❤️❤️

derek would be an overprotective brother let's be real (i'm assuming that's what you meant? tbh i was a little confused about who was the brother but this is the result)

masterlist

Sneaking out of one’s house in the dead of night is already a difficult task. Factor in the fact that the adults in the building all have supernatural hearing, and getting caught seems impossible to avoid. The only factor in your favor is the fact that you absolutely refuse to give up. Derek Hale can do whatever he wants to try and rein you in, but there’s nothing he can do to stop you. Nothing at all.

Honestly, he should have seen this coming. It’s not like any of the Hales are known for their natural rule-abiding tendencies. When Derek was your age, he was crushing on girls and giving them the bite. He should just be happy that you’re not trying to turn anyone and let you do what you please.

That’s what you argue, at least. Derek sees things very differently. You know he’s just terrified to lose another family member after the fire burned your home to the ground, but times are changing. You know how to defend yourself, and you certainly won’t be going down without a fight, if you’ll ever go down at all.

Besides, you’re not looking to get into fights. Not tonight. In fact, you’re doing the exact opposite. You’re slipping out of your room not to seek out danger, nor track down hunters in the hopes of starting a fight. No, you’re practicing all this secrecy because you want to see your boyfriend, a certain Theo Raeken.

You didn’t count on Theo stealing your heart when he first arrived at Beacon Hills. True, his first few months were a little rocky, something about him trying to betray the McCall pack in the name of the Dread Doctors, but he’s come around since then. You didn’t even start thinking about him romantically until a few months after that, once you were sure that he wouldn’t try something bad like that again.

If you ask Theo, though, he’ll tell a story that’s a little different from yours. He once confessed that he started liking you from his very first day, which made it easier to switch sides once he was let out of Hell. Sometimes you wonder if he saw visions of you when he was trapped down there. You don’t think he’ll tell you for quite some time, though. Theo doesn’t like thinking about his time in Hell at all.

Neither do you. That’s why the two of you prefer to let the past stay in the past, and focus only on the future and what it holds. Theo isn’t an enemy to you, not anymore. Not to any of your friends.

That’s not what Derek seems to believe, however. No, Derek is convinced that Theo is nothing but bad news, fit only for betrayal and heartbreak. Every time he happens to see you and Theo together, you can hear his blood pressure skyrocketing and you know you’re in for a lecture once you get home. Despite the fact that Derek made plenty of worse choices in his life, such as dating a darach, you being with Theo is the worst thing your older brother has ever seen.

It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to you, but you’re not too hung up on it to let Derek’s lack of approval stop you. You don’t need your brother, you just need Theo. So, you take care to be extra quiet when you’re lifting the sash of the window and climbing down the fire escape into the cold night. Theo’s truck is idling two blocks over, just in case. He gets out to greet you like he always does.

Despite the fact that sneaking out of the Hale residence gets harder by the hour, and Derek’s wrath is strengthening by the day, it’s all worth it. All of it. The moment Theo’s arms are around you, you think you could take on the world. Maybe you’ll have to, it doesn’t really matter. You’ve got your boyfriend, he’s got you, and you’ve never been better.

Theo presses a kiss to your cheek before opening the passenger side door of his truck. “What do you say we get out of here?”

You laugh. “Sounds great to me.”

Theo smiles too, climbing back into the driver’s side and taking off into the night. You watch the streetlights speed past you, smears of off-white and buzzing gold against the dark air. Theo navigates his way out of the endless maze of suburbs and cul-de-sacs before you’re out in uncharted territory.

You and Theo have christened a spot on the outside of Beacon Hills as yours and yours alone. The Beacon Hills Preserve is in sight, but not all that close. Too many bad supernatural encounters in those woods have somewhat lessened your favor of them. Instead, Theo parks his car on the edge of a field, letting the tall grass and wildflowers brush against his cars. The sky is wide, open as far as the eye can see. It is absolutely perfect.

Theo grabs a blanket from the backseat and spreads it across the bed of his truck. He climbs in first, then holds out a hand to help you in. You lie down on your back so you can watch the stars, leaning against Theo. His hand traces gentle patterns on your arm, soft and soothing. The night is cool, making you curl closer against him. Overhead, the constellations wink and blink, promising stories that only you could ever dare to read.

You blink once and dawn is upon you. The sun is already climbing well into the sky, coloring clouds into rose and flaxen yellow. At first, you’re content to just lie there and marvel at how easy it was to fall asleep until it occurs to you that you weren’t supposed to do that at all.

One glance at the screen of your phone has you swearing under your breath. Theo is asleep by your side, and you frantically shake him awake. He’s slow to come to consciousness at first, but he’s active in seconds when you tell him what time it is. Both of you overslept by a lot, and you overshot the time you were supposed to make it back to your house by a couple of hours. Derek shouldn’t be up, not yet, but you wouldn’t put it past him to check your room. You’ve been known to sneak out in the past, and after the lecture you got last time, you really, really don’t want to be caught again.

Theo’s rushing the whole way back, relying on his supernatural senses to stay out of an accident. That, and the fact that no one is on the road at this hour of the morning. You imagine what a picture the two of you must make– most people just starting to wake up, the earliest risers starting their cars in their garages, while you and Theo are booking it down the road out of fear that your brother would figure out what you’ve done.

Theo brings his truck to a stop close to your house. He peppers apologies in between kisses, then urges you to hurry before it’s too late. You wave goodbye, then take the steps of the fire escape two at a time in your haste to get back inside. You raise your window and climb inside. You hear no sound anywhere else in the apartment, and you have just enough time to thank your lucky stars that you managed to get away with this when the lights flick on, revealing Derek waiting in the shadows.

It takes everything in you to bite back a startled scream. “Jeez, Derek, try not to give me a heart attack, will you?” You clutch a hand to your chest, trying to stop the accursed organ from jumping out of your chest.

Derek doesn’t look remotely sympathetic to your situation. “Why, so you can see that Raeken boy again? I know where you were.”

You wince. “You do.”

“I do,” Derek confirms, “and you’re lucky today’s a school day, or I’d be yelling at you here and now. As it is, you have to get ready or you’re going to miss the bus. Do that and I’ll be even more mad than I am now.”

“I didn’t know it was possible for you to be more mad,” you joke weakly.

“It’s not,” Derek says with a glare, and storms out into the hall.

You collapse to your bed, one hand rising to your head. You really hadn’t wanted Derek to find out, but of course he’d known all along. Derek’s a survivor, he has been all this time. That means he has the instincts of someone searching for all the clues you’re trying to keep hidden. You have the school day as a buffer, but after that, you’re totally done for.

Sure enough, Derek is waiting for you, arms folded across his chest, the moment you close the door behind you in the afternoon. Not only that, but Peter Hale is lounging on the couch, languidly flipping through the day’s newspaper.

You arch a brow at your uncle. “You brought Peter into this?”

Derek groans. “He’s a figure of authority. I thought you’d respect him if you can’t respect me.”

You grin. “Are you sure that was a good idea?”

Across the room, Peter chuckles. “Of course it was. There’s nothing Derek likes more than someone who gives him even more gray hairs than you.”

You and Derek turn to shout at the same time. “Shut up!”

Peter holds up his hands in mock surrender, still laughing under his breath.

Derek looks back at you, brow furrowed. “We’re not talking about Peter, we’re talking about you. You snuck out of this apartment for the fifth time this month. I’ve told you to stay away from Theo, but you were with him. Want to explain yourself?”

“We’re dating,” you say as casually as you can.

Derek pinches the bridge of his nose. “Why? The guy tried to kill Scott and he’s probably angling to kill you. I’m not telling you all this just because I like hearing the sound of my own voice, you know. I’m trying to keep you alive.”

You scoff. “Yeah, because you’ve got a great history with your girlfriends. Weren’t you dating Kate Argent? You know, the one who burned our house down?”

Peter takes this as his sign to add his two cents. “She’s not wrong, you know.”

Derek repeats his sentiment for Peter to shut up at the same time as you encourage your uncle to keep talking. This earns you a swat to the shoulder, and your older brother picks up his lecture again.

“I’m not the one who’s being reprimanded, Y/N, that would be you. I’m serious, you have to stay away from Theo. He’s no good for you.”

“How would you know?” You counter, “all you ever do is try to be as overprotective as you can. I mean, have you ever considered the possibility that I know what I’m doing?”

Derek exhales slowly. “I know you’re capable, but you never know. I’m just trying to keep you safe, is that really so bad?”

You give him a steady look. “When you’re being this overinvolved in my life, yes it is.”

Derek opens his mouth to argue with that, but he’s interrupted by a knock at the door. He tilts his head to the side for a second, listening for heartbeats, then mutters something under his breath about Scott McCall always needing something at the worst possible time.

You interpret that as your chance to escape, so you do so with great excitement. Derek shouts that this isn’t over as you go, but you’re fairly sure it is. 

As you hurry past, Peter calls after you. “The back door is still unlocked, by the way. Derek will be busy for the next half hour or so.”

You grin. “Have I ever mentioned that you’re my favorite Hale?”

“Be sure to bring that up the next time I kill someone,” Peter grumbles, “I could use someone on my side for once.”

It’s hard to control your laugh as you head towards the back exit of the apartment. You text Theo on your way out, and soon enough you’re in his truck once again, speeding away from Derek and his suffocating tendencies as quickly as you can.

Theo shoots you a nervous look as he eases to a stop at a red light. “You’re sure everything is alright? I mean, Derek’s wrath is legendary.”

You shake your head. “We’ll be fine. Derek will stomp around for another day or so, but he doesn’t have it in him to hold grudges for long.”

Theo smiles. “As long as you’re sure about it. I don’t want to get in between you and your brother.”

“You won’t,” you assure him, “we’ve had bigger fights over much less, trust me.”

Theo assures you that he does, and you let the road disappear behind you along with your troubles. As you drive, though, your uneasiness doesn’t dissipate as quickly as usual. 

A few minutes later, you think something is wrong. Glancing back, you whisper something to Theo. “Is it just me, or has that car been following us for a while?”

Theo checks his rearview mirror, then curses. “No, you’re right. That’s a hunter, I recognize the license plate. Hold tight, I’ll try to lose him.”

Theo takes a few sporadic turns, but even his best attempts can’t shake the guy. What’s more, cars appear out of the surrounding streets, slowly but surely forcing Theo to head towards the Preserve and out of sight of any passersby. The hunters stop near the mouth of the woods, and Theo has to park as well lest he risk getting in a crash.

The two of you watch the hunters emerge from their cars, weapons in hand. “Stay in the truck,” Theo tells you, “I’ll take care of this.”

“Not a chance,” you argue, “there are too many of them, we’re doing this together.”

Theo looks like he wants to argue, but you’re already reaching for the door and stepping outside. The hunters issue out the usual threats about wanting to run all supernaturals out of town and whatnot. Thankfully, they aren’t a patient bunch, and so you’re able to skip to the fight before too long.

This isn’t your first bad encounter with the hunters of Beacon Hills, nor will it be the last. You extend your claws, letting your eyes glow. Supernatural strength courses over you and you charge. Despite the fact that the two of you are crazily outnumbered, you and Theo have one thing that the hunters don’t:  an absolute unwillingness to lose.

That’s what you think about when enemy blood is shed, when you snap knives and break guns and refuse to let your fear get the best of you. That’s what you think about when the number of hunters starts to dwindle, when they choose to run into the woods or drive away rather than join their friends in agony on the ground.

That’s why you win, you think. At last, you straighten up and look at Theo. Both of you are alive, and the remaining hunters are fleeing as quickly as they can. You start to smile, but before you can say too much, another voice encapsulates your thoughts.

“That way went better than I expected.”

You whip around to see Derek emerging from his car a few paces away, blinking in surprise. He gestures between the hunters on the ground and you and Theo. “You know, I came all this way to save your asses, but it looks like you’ve already done that.”

“Maybe it’s because I can trust Theo to keep me alive.” You say pointedly.

Derek stares at you a second longer, then sighs and gives in. “Fine, fine. The two of you can keep on seeing each other. Just don’t make that sneaking out stuff a habit.”

You wait until Derek gets back in his car and drives away before daring to look at Theo. Silently, he raises his arms in victory, making you laugh. Maybe Derek isn’t completely beyond reasoning. And maybe, just maybe, you can have both your boyfriend and your brother on your side. Impossibilities were made to be disproven.

teen wolf tag list: @thatfangirl42, @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @rafecameronswhore, @bellabadacadabra, @23victoria,

[missvelvetsstuff]

A snippet from something I'm tossing about in my head. Anyone interested?

No Benefits

Bucky x reader

Y/N opened her eyes to bright light and a bedroom that wasn't hers. The pounding in her head a reminder of how much she drank last night. She looked around and realized it was Bucky's room, where she spent so much of her time. Suddenly, she realized that she was naked and her stomach dropped. She had hazy memories of shots and kisses that turned into more. She smiled even though her head hurt, she had been crushing on Bucky since the day they met and was amazed that he actually wanted her too.

She reached over to find his side of the bed was cool but figured he must have gone on his morning run with Steve and Sam. She sat up and saw a bottle of water next to some pain killers, which she downed, grateful that Bucky was so thoughtful. Drinking the entire bottle of water she realized she really needed to pee. Standing slowly so as not to irritate her headache she grabbed one of Bucky's t-shirts to cover herself and went to relieve herself. When she was done she went back to sit up in bed and check her emails for today's agenda.

When she was responding to a message from Maria Hill the suite door opened and Bucky came in, sweaty and gorgeous. He saw her curled up on his bed and smiling up at him.

"Morning Buck. Good run?"

He nodded and smirked "Yeah, Sam whined at us to wait up but we just lapped him until he shut up"

"Sounds fun. Since it's Sunday and nothing is scheduled, why don't you take a shower and come back to bed?"

Bucky felt his heart stop "Look, Cookie, about last night. You know you're one of my best friends and I love you but I don't feel comfortable getting into a real relationship right now. I still have so much work to do on myself. Last night was great and I was thinking we could have one of those friends with extras, or whatever it's called. You know, to blow off steam."

Her stomach dropped and she felt her eyes filling up "You mean friends with benefits?"

He nodded enthusiastically "Yeah, that's it." he smiled hopefully.

Y/N was quiet for a minute before responding, was it worth the almost guaranteed heartbreak to have more nights like last night? She shook her head, unwilling to take that risk again.

"I'm sorry Buck but I can't do that. I get attached and end up heartbroken. I can't sleep with people that I don't have romantic feelings for."

His eyes grew wide "Wait, that means you have feelings...." He trailed off.

She nodded whispering "Yeah, I do."

Bucky's face dropped "Shit, I'm sorry. I thought we were on the same page last night. I don't know what to say. I mean, I might develop feelings over time but I don't know. I don't want to make any promises, you know?"

She swallowed the sob that tried to escape "You don't have to say anything, we can just pretend this never happened. Ok?"

She got up from the bed, clutching the sheet to her and desperately searching for her dress from last night.

He nodded but wasn't feeling too sure of that, he could hear her heart speed up and see her hands shaking "Yeah, sure, nothing has to change."

She smiled at him sadly, tears escaping "I uh I just remembered some paperwork I needed to finish up. I'll catch you later."

"Wait doll. I-"

"Don't worry it's fine." She cleared her throat "I could use a little space and just have work to do." She kissed him on the cheek before rushing out.

Bucky stood there, not sure how to proceed. He didn't want to lose his friend but really didn't feel like he could handle a relationship now. The stress relief from the great sex they had was something he could handle and he did have feelings for her, since the day he arrived at the compound but he knew she deserved a better man than him.

***********************************************

Should I keep going?

Masterlist

[anarchy-and-piglins]

Would you care for a spare AU on this fine day?

Think about it: Moon Bunnyblade

Bunnies live on the moon in their very nice Bunny Kingdom. But even in the very nice Bunny Kingdom, there are still lost and forgotten children. Children on the streets with no one to take care of them. Seen as nuisances and not worth anyone's time. Pests.

Technoblade is not a pest. He is a very smart bunny.

I mean, how many six year olds know how to sneak to earth?

Earth is a bit scary because there are these terrifying tall swaying things (trees) and tons of these really weird colorful things (flowers). But he is a brave bunny and he persevered.

He runs into a 6 year old Wilbur and is in absolute awe of the wings on the kid's back. Wilbur, in turn, is fascinated by Techno's soft looking ears.

They click immediately.

Techno sneaks off the moon more and more, bringing sweet treats he stole to share with his first and only friend. Wilbur enjoys talking to Techno and singing him pretty songs. Best buds.

Wilbur introduces Techno to Philza and THAT is a little scarier. Philza has very sharp claws. He is very tall. And, unlike Wilbur, he can actually fly.

He also has a very shiny hat. Gold and emeralds.

Philza welcomes Technoblade into his very big house and Technoblade is happy to play with Wilbur in the massive halls. Philza is kind enough to provide a wide range of vegetarian options so Techno doesn't have to eat the stinky meat.

Philza is very curious about the Moon Bunnies legendary potions, but Techno doesn't know much about them. He's a street kid. He can't read.

Philza teaches him to read and Wilbur begins to have sooooooo much trouble dragging his friend out of the library. He tries his best to convince his Dad to un-literate his new friend.

As nice as Earth is, though, Techno still always returns to the moon. It's his home, though it begins to feel less and less that way.

He spots an old book in a trash can.

It's not particularly rare or out of the ordinary. There were tons of books on potions on the Moon. He had never gotten to have one, but he saw them all the time.

He immediately takes the dingy book with him back to earth to give to Phil. Phil is over the moon (pun intended)

The Moon Kingdom is NOT happy about this.

Little street rat running around on the earth? Who cares!

Little street rat sharing kingdom secrets to their enemies, The Elytrians? Big Problem.

The soldiers chase Techno down, intent to bring him into custody. But his is six (maybe seven, now) and he is afraid. So he runs, as fast as he can, to the one place that feels safe.

He ends up really REALLY injured and collapses in the woods outside of whatever city the Elytrians live in.

Wilbur was expecting his friend to come that day and goes out to look for him, only to find him in a puddle of blood unconscious and FREAKS OUT. He runs to get his dad, but he is so upset that it takes Philza a while to figure out what happened. When Philza does figure it out, he goes out and carefully picks up the little bunny and brings him back to be helped.

Its a good thing Techno gave him that potion book otherwise Techno would be dead. As it is, he loses a foot, but he will live.

The Bunny Kingdom sends a diplomat and demands that Philza overturns the criminal and the book.

Philza refuses both and the Bunny Kingdom says that it will be seen as a declaration of war.

Philza says bring it.

Aaaaaand that's all I got! Philza probably crushes the bunnies and keeps his new fluffy son. Honestly, he is really soft and fluffy. Very cuddle-able. He's probably going to insist on carrying him everywhere, he is so incredibly soft.

A mean kick, though. Best to stay on the footless side when you demand he eats broccoli.

Sometimes you send me banger asks like this and I keep them hostage in my inbox for over a month (this one is from December 2023) and I feel bad but I do this because I wanna reread them over and over and over again. I love this one in particular, this is just so HNNNN

[matchingbatbites]

Love Grows - Part 5

This part is from Steve's POV, just a little treat for y'all. We'll be back to Eddie in the next part. Also, I've actually done a little planning and this fic looks like it's going to be 10 chapters, which means we're officially halfway through! I'm so excited to share the rest, and I'm glad you've all been enjoying it so far!

Ao3 | Part 1 | Part 4 | Part 6

July 4, '85

Over the last few years, Steve has learned that he’s good at protecting people. He can hold his own in a fight, for the most part, and he can take a hit better than anyone else in their group. When he and Robin get captured by the Russians, his only thought is to keep her safe, to keep their attention on himself so they don't even look twice at her.

He gains a few hits to the face - plus his third concussion in as many years - and loses a few fingernails, but it's worth it when Robin is able to walk away, fairly unsteady from the drugs running through their system, but otherwise untouched.

And Steve is- Steve misses Rosie. As he sits on the bathroom floor, waiting for his nausea to settle, his sweet baby girl is the only thing he can think about. It still amazes him just how quickly she became the light of his life, the absolute center of his world, and now he worries that he’ll never get to see her again. He worries that he won’t be able to apologize to Eddie for not coming back that night, that he never called. 

He hopes that Eddie won't think too badly of him for disappearing for a few days. It’s not Steve’s fault, and he knows it, but Eddie has no idea of what’s been going on in the background of Hawkins, he wouldn’t know why Steve has just vanished. That thought alone is almost enough to make him sick, and probably would if he hadn't just spent the last few minutes emptying his stomach into the nearby toilet.

He’s glad, though, he knows that he’s left Rosie in good hands just in case anything does happen. He knows that Eddie and Wayne will take care of her if he doesn’t make it out of this mess.

Robin starts talking, the room stops spinning, and they throw questions back and forth, trying to see if the drugs have left their system. When Robin asks him “Are you still in love with Nancy?” Steve finds himself answering with a genuine, honest “No.”

“Why not?” she presses, and brown doe eyes flash through Steve’s mind. His head drops back against the bathroom wall as he thinks about silver rings and a teasing smile. 

“I think because I found someone who's a little bit better for me.” 

Steve had always kind of noticed Eddie in school - hard not to notice him, honestly - but had never really interacted with him until Rosie. He had been the first person outside Steve’s little circle to show an interest in the baby, and he didn’t judge Steve for trying to raise her on his own, even offered to help even though he didn't have to, even though he didn't even know Steve. 

And at some point in the last few months, Steve has gone from never speaking to Eddie, to having a full-blown crush on the guy. 

It only gets worse every time he sees the metalhead - when he brings Rosie by the shop while Steve is working, or when they hang out after Steve’s shift, Rosie asleep nearby while something plays on the tv. Little moments that only add to the quickly growing affection he has for the older man.

“And it's crazy. Ever since Dustin got home, he's been saying, you know, ‘you gotta find your Suzie. You gotta find your Suzie-’”

Robin cuts in with a confused “Wait, who's Suzie?”

Steve sighs and pushes a hand through his hair. “Some girl from camp, I guess his girlfriend? To be honest with you, I'm not 100% sure she's even real. But that's not… That's not really the point. It doesn't matter. The point is this person, you know the one that I like, it's somebody that I didn't even talk to at school. And like, I know why, we didn’t run in the same circles or whatever.”

He rubs his forehead and winces at the throb of pain behind his eyes. “It's stupid, I mean, Dustin's right, it's all just a bunch of bullshit anyways. Because when I think about it, I wish I had known them sooner. First of all, they’re hilarious. Like, so funny. And they’re smart, but not like, book smart. They’re smart where it counts, and they’re one of the most creative people I’ve ever met, like super multi-talented. You know, they’re honestly unlike anyone I've ever met before.”

Steve waits for some kind of remark, but Robin is silent, to the point that he asks a soft “Robin? Robin, did you just OD in there?”

A soft sigh, followed by a “No. I am still alive.”

Without thinking twice, Steve scoots forward and slides under the wall to join her, ignoring how the motion aggravates his nausea as he sits upright again. Robin’s face scrunches in disgust as she says “The floor's disgusting,” and Steve huffs a laugh.

“Yeah well, I've already got a bunch of blood and puke on my shirt so… What do you think?”

“About?”

“This person?”

“She sounds awesome.”

And Steve pauses, thinks maybe this once he could be honest, be open with someone about this. He loves Robin, she’s become his best friend so quickly, and if he can’t tell her about himself after the last few days, then…

He replies softly, “Yeah, he is awesome.”

Robin’s jaw drops at the admission and she sits up straighter. “He?” 

Steve nods and shrugs a shoulder. “I always kind of… noticed guys. Like, been attracted to them. But he’s the first guy I’ve ever wanted to actively be with, to date.” 

“Is it Eddie?” she asks, blunt as ever. “Because every time he comes into the shop you get this dopey look on your face, and I’m like 80-percent certain that you stare at his ass whenever he leaves.”

Steve slides down the wall a little and wonders if Robin can see him blushing under the blood smeared across his face. “I- Yes, Rob, it’s Eddie. Didn’t think I was that obvious about it.”

"Don't worry, you're not. Not to anyone who isn't gay, at least."

Steve pauses and blinks at her, asks a soft "You too?" and gets a nod in response.

Robin looks like a weight has been lifted from her, and when she tells him about Tammy Thompson, Steve just beams at her, ignores the ache in his face as he starts to rag on her because really? Tammy? Robin could do better, and he tells her as much, and they're both a giggling mess when Dustin and Erica find them.

July 9, ‘85

It’s a few days after Starcourt when Steve notices something interesting. 

He doesn’t have a job anymore, and though he has been looking for a new one, he’s been loving the extra time he’s had with Rosie, getting to actually spend full days with her without the worry of having to be somewhere, especially while he’s still healing up. It’s a good thing too, because the baby has been extra clingy since he returned from his unexpected kidnapping, with no sign of wanting to let her dad out of her sight any time soon.

Right now though, she’s crawling around the house, going from room to room, occasionally calling out a loud “Ma-ma?” as Steve slowly trails behind her, curious as to what she’s doing. She works her way through the most used rooms, and even smacks her hands on the glass patio door and peers into the backyard. Whatever she’s looking for must not be around, and she seems to realize it as well. 

Her face scrunches up and she sits on the floor, looking dejected, and when Steve goes over she looks up at him with wide eyes and reaches out with a watery “Dada…” The sight makes Steve’s heart ache and he picks her up with a soft “C’mere, nugget,” and carries her up to the bedroom. 

He nearly drops her when she yells “Mama!” and starts wriggling like a worm. Steve turns, sees her reaching desperately for the pictures taped to the nearby wall, and huh. He tugs a polaroid free from the collection and hands it to the baby, and he’s surprised when she settles down and starts babbling once it’s in her hands. Steve stares down at the photo, just a simple, silly one of Rosie and Eddie. And Steve suddenly has a theory.

That's how he finds himself at Eddie's place, Rosie propped on his hip as he unlocks the door with the spare key the Munsons gave him (and god, if that doesn’t make him feel things, that they trust him with a key to their home). He steps inside as Eddie looks up, and Steve sees that the older boy is sitting on the floor, surrounded by pages and pages of what appear to be D&D notes. Rosie lets out a “Mama!” and starts wiggling as soon as she sees Eddie, and Steve carries her over and hands her off to the surprised metalhead. 

“Please don’t tell me I was supposed to watch her and forgot,” Eddie says as he pulls the baby into his arms and hugs her. Steve smiles and shakes his head, sets the diaper bag on the couch before settling on the floor next to Eddie, being careful to not jostle any of the pages.

“Nah. She kept crawling around the house looking for ‘mama’. I figured she was talking about you, and I’m happy to see that I’m right.”

Eddie blinks in disbelief and pulls Rosie back a little so he can look at her. She babbles happily and pats her hands on his cheeks, then squeals in delight when Eddie blows a raspberry into one of her palms. Steve’s heart swells at the sight, as he watches how Eddie interacts with his daughter, sees so clearly just how much they adore each other.

“Mama, huh?” Eddie mutters and presses a kiss to her other tiny hand. “Never thought I’d be someone’s mama.”

Something in his voice makes Steve pause. He hadn’t even thought about what Eddie wanted Rosie to call him, he just thought her automatically associating Eddie as mama was… cute. "If it- if it makes you uncomfortable, I'm sure we can teach her to call you something else-" 

He's cut off when Eddie yelps out a sudden "No!" as he pulls Rosie close and squishes his cheek against hers, an affronted look on his face. “No way! I’m mommy now, fuck you!”

Oh. 

Steve isn’t expecting the bright spike of desire that shoots through him at Eddie’s declaration, and fuck that’s something he needs to think about later and not when he’s sitting right in front of the object of his crush and his infant daughter.

Eddie seems to realize what he’s said at the same moment Steve does, as his face flushes bright red and he immediately averts his eyes. Steve clears his throat, can feel just how warm his own cheeks are as he looks down at the papers around them, desperate for a distraction.

“So, uh, what’s all this for?”

“Uh, D&D stuff,” Eddie replies as he sets Rosie in his lap. She whines for a moment before realizing that he isn’t going anywhere, that he’s just setting her somewhere comfortable, and she settles into him as he distracts her with his ringed hand. “I’m working on the big campaign I plan to run during the school year. Lots of parts, lots of things to have in order.”

“Tell me about it?” Steve asks, genuinely curious, and when Eddie launches into the intricacies of the story, he listens, enraptured. He finds that he’s at his happiest during these moments, when it’s just the three of them, enjoying each other's company and simply existing together.

And like an inevitable fact of the universe, a puzzle piece slotting into place, Steve knows in this moment that he wants this for the rest of his life.

Tag list:

@luciana-rowan @bidisastersworld @little-gae-shit @thehumblefigtree @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @estrellami-1 @shrimply-a-menace @anaibis @livelaughlexa @vampireinthesun @zerokrox-blog @mackdaddyofheimlichcountyy @idea-less-author @thegingerrapunzel @stevesbipanic @electrick-marionnett @tuesdaycats @seths-rogens @flustratedcas @qomrades @artiststarme @death-the-elf @itsanarrum @linkydinky06 @jaywhohasthegay @aboredowl @maya-custodios-dionach t @eerielake @smolbasilboy @freyaforestafay @gleek4twd @gayngerthings @newtstabber @lucasrightarm @huskysarelife @i-must-potato @thegingervulcan @novelnovella @ryebread375 @stardustonpages @trensu @otaku-bell-livemotto @thev01dd @demolvr @hellfireloserclub @beenovel @anzelsilver @f1ct1onwh0re @ravenphoenix94

[sleidog]

a fun little collection of Runa lore from RP/general thoughts:

Runa's ability to have multiple tendrils/limbs when they're damaged beyond repair and easier to just. remove. has had the number cap removed, from doubling, to 'whatever looks cool :)' i feel like this is most important for the back tendrils, where his arm is probably going to have a soft limit around 4 Runa's additional eyes are sense organs for sure, but they don't actually -see- like a normal eye, despite the visual function of them and their ability to emote, matching his own expressions the extra eyes sense heat/movement, and the sensation of them locking in on something is relayed to Runa to judge for himself if that thing he 'saw' move is worth investigating Runa's particularly strong senses are based around movement, heat and magic. he's great at pinpointing a magically inclined target, finding a magically charged object, etc or spotting a hot target through dense foliage, especially if it moves suddenly! his eyesight is actually pretty average, and his taste and smell are incredibly dull [unless what he can smell/taste is augmented by some kind of magic] if you were to peel back runa's charcoal-y armour, you'd find the remnants of his actual arm still under it, but there isn't an awful lot of it left [it's gone from just before the elbow down] as such, he has very little sensation in his left arm! from the elbow down in particular, he cannot feel if something is touching/pushing on his arm, it also means it's of no consequence to do his hyrda nonsense with breaking his arm off manually at the elbow joint and growing more limbs [while he can break it off higher up, this isn't advised, the higher he goes, the more sensation he loses. do not ask him to hold things in his right hand, he will drop or crush it, because he can't control how hard he's gripping something his hair leaves were longer when he was a sapling and his skin resembled more of the aspen tree he's based on, greyish with black eye-like markings, over time with the burning and loss of his limb, his body has been stained by the charcoal that flakes off of him [in theory, if you were to give him a very thorough scrubbing, you could get him back to a more mid/pale grey shade, but it's not worth the effort the armour has the texture of charcoal, flaky and brittle but quite dense, under extreme stress, the armour splits and vents out black smoke from little crackly embers that run through the middle of his arm, the smoke is extremely toxic/hallucinogenic and should not be inhaled [he can vent it at will as well, but this is a rarity and happens from his shoulder spikes; the smoke when done at will takes a yellowish hue, and he's basically isolating and superheating his own blood into a fine vapour and expelling it, it's corrosive if you're caught in the moment it's released and almost sulphuric in scent getting onto that 'superheating' aspect; runa's pretty adverse to fire, understandably after he almost lost his life to it; however in his current state, he's quite resiliant to fire, in fact, his charcoal arm is fully resistant to fire, it simply does nothing to him at all [however the visual can make him panic and recoil] Runa's body runs quite hot, around 53C at his core! he's a walking radiator, but the heat is less intense if touching his skin/extremities, still hotter than an average person to a noticable degree his body glow is normal on the right side of his body, but his left side resembles crackly embers across freshly burnt wood if he DOES burn out his armour too much, it takes a greyish/white tint, and he'll flake away at it like a person would do with a sunburn, it's gives him a sensation similar to a phantom itch, he shouldn't be able to feel it but he can see it flaking so it makes him feel itchy

[rocksinmuffin]

Now I’ve gotta ask for Ace and Deuce being cockblocked by Grim (not to mention each other) and no one ever being able to make a move on MC.

I belive this ask is in response to this post I made and I could not resist.

~*~

Deuce stares at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, eyes narrowed and lips set in a thin line. Today’s the day, he tells himself. “Today’s the day I’m going to confess my feelings.”

“Are you really psyching yourself up to tell the prefect you like them?” Ace gives Deuce an unimpressed look. “Cringe.”

“It’s not cringe!!!” he shouts back, cheeks bright red. “And who said I was confessing to the prefect?”

Ace rolls his eyes. “Everyone knows you have a crush on them. It’s not subtle. Not that it matters. You don’t have a chance with them.”

“Whatever, jerk. How would you even know?”

Ace cocks his head to the side, lips curling into a wicked smirk. “Because they’re going to be too busy falling head over heels for me.”

Ace looks so confident it makes Deuce’s heart clench in fear. Is it possible you already like Ace? After all, Ace is charming. Grades aside, he does well in most things without even trying. What if he sweeps you off your feet just as effortlessly?

But then Deuce feels a sense of warm resolve splash over him like a wave. He’s not going to give up. Not on this. Not on you. Because just the chance of being with you is something worth fighting for, tooth and nail. If you don’t choose him, he’ll understand and he won’t hold it against you, but he’s not going to throw in the towel before the fight has even begun.

Deuce looks at Ace with fire burning in his eyes, fist clenched and held up in front of his chest. I won’t lose to you, he thinks, but he must say it out loud because Ace laughs, a smile stretched from ear to ear that doesn’t reach his eyes.

“I’ll take that bet. First one to score a date with the prefect, wins. Loser has to back off and admit defeat. Deal?”

Ace holds out his hand and Deuce takes it without any hesitation, grip firm as they shake on it.

~*~

Ace will be the first to say that he’s the last person anyone should make a bet with because he does not play fair.

Winning is the only thing that matters in the end. What good is sticking to your morals and playing by the rules if you end up losing? If you really want to win then that should mean you’d be willing to do anything to end up on top, even if it means getting your hands a little dirty. If you’re not willing to do that then maybe winning—and what comes with it—doesn’t mean as much to you as you think it did.

But you? Well, you mean the world to Ace.

Deuce has nothing to say to him when they leave the dorm and head for their first class. Just keeps that stupid determined look on his face as he marches forward. That’s fine with Ace. Because while Deuce is so focused on his own thing, Ace can think of ways to sabotage it.

It’s obvious he’s trying to hide it but Deuce isn’t exactly subtle about the little plastic food container he’s carrying under his arm. And Ace knows that Deuce has been going to Trey after classes for help studying. It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together.

So Deuce is planning to confess to you with the help of some home-baked goodies he made. Gag. But, embarrassing as that is, having something physical to gift you means Deuce is less likely to back out than if it was just a verbal confession. And offering you a gift could make Ace look bad for going to you empty-handed.

Deuce might think he has the upper hand, but he probably wasn’t counting on Ace figuring out his plan. Now all Ace needs to do is figure out how to use this to his advantage.

~*~

The opportunity comes at lunch time.

“I’m so hungry I’m going to collapse,” Grim whines, face planting against the cafeteria table, muffling his words . “Minion, get me that tuna melt I like.”

“Uh-huh,” you grunt, unamused. “What are the magic words?”

“Bippity bobbity boo?”

You open your mouth to say something, stop, then shrug. “Anyone else buying lunch?”

Deuce shakes his head, lips set in a thin line and eyes sharp as he stares down at his plastic bin filled with goodies. He doesn’t say anything. It’s obvious he’s still trying to mentally psych himself up.

You raise an eyebrow but otherwise pay his oddness little mind before turning to Ace. “How about you?”

“Nah,” Ace waves you off, “Not hungry.”

You raise another incredulous eyebrow but don’t push the issue. “Fine, I’ll wait in line by myself then.”

“Try not to get your lunch money stolen on the way, nerd,” Ace teases.

You lift your middle finger in the air as you walk off.

“I don’t think I’m going to last” Grim whines words slightly muffled where his mouth is pressed flat to the table’s surface. “If I don’t get any food in me in the next ten seconds I’m gonna die.”

“Why don’t you just ask Deuce for some of the food he’s been hoarding to himself all this time,” Ace helpfully suggests, eyes wicked and smirk much too pleased with himself.

At the mention of food, Grim perks up in his seat. He turns to Deuce, fuzzy brows furrowed and eyes burning as he scowls. “Is that true? Have you been holding out on us?!”

“What?” Deuce blinks, drawn out of his thoughts for the first time all afternoon.

“What do you mean what?” Ace feigns an annoyed expression. “You just gonna pretend you don’t have enough cookies on you to feed our whole dorm?”

Deuce’s eyes widen. “How did you know I made cookies?”

“Cookies? Why didn’t you say so?!” Grim leaps on the table and swipes the plastic box, peeling off the lid before Deuce can even blink. “They look kinda wonky but they smell okay at least.”

“They don’t look wonky!” Deuce shouts, cheeks pink with either anger or embarrassment. His angry expression shifts to worry as he looks back at the container. “…do they?”

Grim pulls a short bread cookie out of the box that is likely supposed to be shaped like a heart, however, it’s lumpy and asymmetrical and the sprinkles look like they were applied by a kindergartener. It’s one of the most pathetic homemade creations that Ace has ever seen in his life and exactly the kind of pathetic display that would probably make you incredibly grateful and emotional because you are so endearingly stupid and sentimental.

Ace and Deuce watch silently as Grim throws the cookie up in the air then lean his head back to catch it in the gaping black hole that is his mouth. He chews thoughtfully, mouth mostly closed as he works the contents from one side of his mouth to the other before swallowing with an audible gulp.

“Huh,” Grim says, “Not bad. A solid five out of ten.”

And then he proceeds to upend the box over his head and let the contents pour into his mouth.

“Hey! I worked hard on those!”

Deuce lunges forward but Grim swiftly avoids the attack with a sidestep, not a single crumb missing his mouth as he continues his realistic impression of a living garbage disposal. Another lunge, another miss, and Grim chokes a little in the middle of a victorious laugh as some cookie crumbs go down the wrong pipe.

Frustrated, Deuce turns to Ace. “Are you gonna help me or what?”

“And risk losing a finger?” Ace asks with a raised brow. “No thanks.”

Not that Ace would have been able to help even if he had been inclined to (which he wasn’t). With a satisfied burp, Grim drops the now-empty plastic container and lets it fall to the table with an audible clunk. Crumbs and sprinkles cling to the wet fur around his mouth.

The devastated look Deuce gives to the empty container almost makes Ace feel bad for actively sabotaging his love confession. Not bad enough that he would have done anything differently, mind you, but enough that he’ll try not to rub it later.

“I can’t believe you ate them all.” Deuce huffs and Ace can’t tell if Deuce looks like he’s about to cry or punch a hole in the wall. “They were meant to be for… for…”

“For who?” You interrupt, lunch tray in hand wafting with the pungent scent of tuna melt.

“For everyone,” Ace jumps in. “Deuce brought cookies for all of us but Grim gobbled them all up before I could even try one. Isn’t that right, Deuce?”

“Uh, yeah,” he agrees, taking the out Ace has given him. The only thing worse than having a confession sabotaged would be admitting to it.

“You didn’t even save one for me? Grim, you poop-butt!” You stick your tongue out at Grim as you set the tray in front of him and he blows a raspberry back at you before immediately picking up the sandwich and chowing down.

“Well, if you’re in the mood for something sweet, I heard the Mostro Lounge has a new dessert on the menu.” Ace flashes a flirty grin that he’s been practicing in the mirror since he hit puberty. “I could take you. My treat.”

“Uh-huh,” you reply, looking incredulous, “And how do you plan on paying for it.”

“I’ve been saving up,” he answers, color rising to his cheeks when the words catch up with his brain. He hopes he didn’t sound too eager but it’s too late to take it back now.

You raise another incredulous eyebrow, lip set in a thin line as you think over his offer. Technically, it’s not even a date, but Ace still feels sweat dripping down the back of his neck and his in his palms as if he just asked if he could be your boyfriend.

Before you can give an answer, Grim groans, cheeks looking a little green beneath his fur.

“Minion,” he whines miserably, tugging at your sleeve. “I don’t feel so good.”

“That’s what you get for scarfing down your sandwich after gorging yourself on all that sugar, you brat.” You sigh as you take him into your arms, tucking your shoulder under his chin and holding him carefully against your chest. You turn back to Ace. “Sorry, but I better get Grim to the nurse’s office. You‘ll have to go without me.”

Ace curses under his breath. He didn’t think his plan to sabotage Deuce would come back to bite him. Grim eats rocks off the ground; what are the chances that he would get sick from overeating now of all times?

That’s when Ace and Deuce both catch Grim’s eye as you turn your back to go to the nurse and Grim’s sick expression morphs to a fanged smirk as he snuggles up against you.

Their jaws drop, speechless, and you and Grim are gone.

Ace and Deuce turn to one another, understanding a temporary truce established as they realize they are not the only rivals for your attention.

[alien-the-ghost]

After the ritual

Kinktober day 4, anal (Papa emeritus ii x m!reader)

Explicit 18+ only please

Summary: After a particuarly lively ritual, Secondo is still unusually buzzing. In his light mood, he is still energetic, wanting to draw it out as long as possible.

Tags: Anal sex, Anal fingering, Spit as lube, Oral sex

Words: 2,272

Notes: I honestly am not entirely proud of this one but I hope you enjoy. I did go completely feral however

Kinktober list by @kroas-adtam, divider by wrathofrats, masterlist coming soon

Read under the cut or on ao3 <3

It was finally over, and he could breathe again. Secondo was used to the heavy burden that came with his rituals, the ministry had high expectations that rung like an alarm in his head after every performance. That buzzing feeling from the energy of the crowd dispersed all at once when the spotlight was no longer on him, each stage of the ritual came with a new anxiety that he needed to drown out.

Today felt different. He still felt the intense urge to lose himself in the arms of another, yet there wasn’t the heavy crushing feeling that came with it. He felt light, energetic, as if he were still performing. It was noticeable in his demeanour, still elegant as though there was no weight on his shoulders when he walked past a group of siblings that travelled with him to help on tour.

You were there amongst them.

You enjoyed getting away from the abbey for a while, as well as the rituals themselves, not minding the workload that came with it. It was all worth it to see Papa. Those few moments of him walking past after the shows, without a glance in your direction, however, was the closest you’d been to him. It happened every night, usually you'd be helping his ghouls with the heavy lifting, hearing their numerous sighs when you would stop to drink in his every detail.

This time in his lighter mood, he looked back.

He slows down, and gives you a knowing stare. A look you’d seen him give many of his fans you later saw him with at many hotels, a smirk even if you weren’t kidding yourself. And then he was gone. You caught your breath again, unable to get the only little interaction you’d had with Papa out of your mind.

When you next see him, only 40 minutes later, he’s out of the chasuble, and by extension, the paints. Although his face was still obscured by a pair of large sunglasses, and you’d seen him without the paints before, it felt like you were truly seeing him for the first time. He doesn’t say anything to you, but he gives you that look again. You felt your heart thud in your chest. You needed to say something to him.

“That was a wonderful ritual, Papa.” You smiled awkwardly.

“Ah, thank you brother.” He just stands there, feeling how you were still under his gaze, despite it being obscured.

“Do you have any plans this evening?” You wanted to slap yourself, Papa wasn’t one for small talk, neither were you really, yet you let the pressure of this situation get to you. You expected him to just walk away, but instead he actually answers you.

“Well, that depends.”

“What does it depend on?” You swallowed hard when he took a few steps closer, until you could practically feel the heat of his body.

“You.”

From you meeting him outside and getting into his car, to his hotel room, felt like a blur. You couldn’t really believe it the entire time, unsure of whether he’d even be interested in a man, nevermind you. But now there he was, shutting and locking the door so nobody else could intrude on whatever he was about to do to you.

You were his tonight and his alone.

He stalked up to you, feeling small from the way he slowly looked down on you as if you were his prey, then again he was inches from you. His lips brushed against yours, ever so slightly, breath caught in your throat. But then he went straight for your neck.

Your knuckles paled from how deep your fingernails dug their way into his suit jacket, moustache tickling your neck in contrast to how harshly he made his mark.

He was in complete control of your every movement, playing your body expertly, every jolt and rut of your hips against his palm was exactly what he wanted. A vibration rang across your neck, a delighted hum from him that urged another breathless moan out of you.

“Mi dispiace brother, I’m afraid your Papa is starting to feel impatient now.” The next thing you registered was how he shoved you into his mattress, fiddling and pulling at your cassock until he was able to pull it over your head with your help. Within those few moments you were completely bare to him, unable to even register that Papa Emeritus had practically torn the clothes off your body before he was on top of you.

His hand only briefly grazed your cock, a desperation surging through you for him to touch you, to thrust up into his hand until he looked you in the eyes as you spilled all over his glove. But he wanted more than that, he wanted your entire body. Rough hands lifted you up by the hips, kneeding the soft skin behind you until he was at your ass. All you could do was let the evidence of your pleasure spill from you, until you opened your eyes, and you could only see your reflection in his glasses staring back at you.

Then you started to feel shy.

You were unable to see how he looked at you, how he was truly reacting to your every reaction and expression. All you could see was yourself, very aware of what you were giving him, without knowing if he even enjoyed it.

For a moment he stilled, the intensity came to a creaking halt, mind temporarily unclouded enough to take in the echos of panting that filled the walls. He was checking to see if you still wanted him, sensing your unease.

Without a word you grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him in, swallowing his surprised moan in a deep, passionate kiss. Nimble fingers worked his buttons, a deep breath to be heard from him as your hand brushed against his bare skin. He allowed you to lightly push him to the side, sinking to your knees at the edge of the bed. He muttered a curse at the sight of you looking up at him longingly in between his legs.

He was still hidden, behind a reflection that only showed what he was seeing. You wanted to see how you made him feel, how he’d look at you lost in bliss. His face shifted when you reached out to take them off. For a moment his hand was on your wrist, but noticing the gentle look you gave him, with reluctance he let go.

The look he was giving you made you throb. Eyes capturing you in a trance and burning into yours, a carnal desire simmering behind what he was hiding. His hands were quickly at your shoulders, shoving your to your knees once again, a slight curve of his lips apparent through the way his eyes crinkled. You were completely bare before him, now noticing the way his eyes fixate on your leaking cock, standing and desperate to be touched. But right now you wanted nothing more than to taste him, and feel him fuck back into your throat.

You took initiative, baring his cock to the room, and only allowing yourself to briefly admire how richly endowed he is, the way his cock curved, sparking a pooling fire in your belly imagining how that would feel inside you. Just as impatient as he was, you took him in. A pleasured groan rumbled from his chest, hand grabbing a fistful of the sheet, instead of tangling in your hair and allowing himself full rein. No, he let you adjust to him, you were already taking him deeper than expected. He did allow himself, however, the pleasure of sighing and rocking his hips ever so slightly up into you.

“You will want to get me nice and wet, brother, unless you want it to hurt.” You whined around him at that, the thought of him fucking you into the sheets, and lack of oxygen, made you dizzy. You drooled around his length at that very thought. A gasp escaped his lips when you moaned around him, small grunts urging you on until he was close. He had to pull you off, he wasn’t finished with you.

“On the bed.” The only sounds he wanted you to hear were his direct orders. He was usually this blunt, you wanted nothing more than to hear him lose himself inside you.

He pressed you in deeper, giving you three fingers to coat with your saliva as he worked on stripping himself until he was only in his shirt barely hanging on by one button. He looked at you straight in the eyes, a hungry glint as he spread you open and slotted himself between your thighs, and then his finger breached your entrance.

You jolted momentarily, a surprising gentle rub of your hips as he eased himself inside you. Your muscles relaxed quickly, granting easy access for the second. You moaned at the way he impatiently wanted to stretch you further, fucking yourself back on his fingers to give him permission. At the third stretch your mouth fell open, yet only a strangled gasp left you.

He shushed you gently, his other hand brushing against your cheek. For a moment things were calm, he was knelt in front of your writhing body, taking you in fully whilst he carefully massaged you. You had started to become almost too comfortable in this moment, which elicited a groan in disappointment when his fingers left you empty.

“I’m going to fuck you now.” He said with only a slight quiver of his voice. All you could do was dumbly nod, and allow yourself to be pulled until your legs were wrapped around him. He took himself in hand and positioned himself at your entrance. He looked into your eyes once more, the pair of you locked in an intense gaze, then he breached your walls.

You whimpered at the intrusion, his cock stretching you even further than his fingers had already, clenching around his tip. He waited for a few moments for your breathing to become less ragged before pushing further, a delirious whine leaving your mouth, he felt so unbelievably good inside you. He wanted to take his time but you needed him to fill you completely, your hands snaked their way around his hips to his ass, pushing him deeper until he bottomed out. He let out a sharp gasp, unexpected tightness coating him entirely until his hips were flush with yours. His face was inches from yours again, foreheads touching and noses grazing each other, yet neither of you made a move to kiss. The air between you was heavy, feeling his hot breath tickle your lips, his cock twitch and write inside you. All you could do was stare into his eyes clouded with primal desire, and squeeze his ass to urge him on.

He pulled back, shuddering, and gave you a hard thrust. Your loud moan could probably be heard through the walls, urging him to do it again. He kept going, fucking you slow, hard, and deep, lips parted and ragged breaths to be heard only slightly over your own synthony.

“F-fuck, feel so good, Papa…” You wanted to say more, to describe to him exactly how his thick throbbing cock filled you perfectly, but your mind was so clouded in pleasure that you could barely get out a sentence. Your hands remained at his ass, pushing him so close, so deep inside you, bodies rubbing against each other with every rock of his hips.

Your body jolted entirely when his stomach brushed against your very neglected cock. Your sticky beads of precum wiped across him. He noticed the way you shifted, and almost wanted to let out a chuckle when he realised why.

His thrusts became shallower and faster over time, grunts louder than you’d heard them. His hands moved on their own accord, moving from your shoulders to your hips, sitting up and moving you up and down his shaft desperately. You couldn’t take it anymore, you needed release. A large sigh of relief amongst the many moans spilling from your lips as you pleasured yourself on both your hand and his cock.

“A-ah, so close…” A growl followed your desperate words, fingers digging deeper into your sides, then he rutted into you like he owned you. That thought had you toppling over the edge, a cut off moan before you were spilling onto yourself. What happened next was unexpected, in the heated moment he lent down and firmly pressed his lips to yours, parting your mouth with his tongue.

“Fuck.” His one word echoed in your mouth, and with that he became undone, a series of growls and moans escaping him as he filled you with his release. A deep exhale, and he collapsed onto your chest, still inside you.

You remained like that for a few minutes, feeling his cock soften inside you felt incredibly intimate for some reason, the way he had his moment of passion yet still remained. After a very full evening, you were both exhausted, drifting off without even realising it.

Secondo was used to waking up sprawled out across the bed after a night of pleasure, the sun through the blinds making his head pound. What he was not used to was waking up in the arms of somebody else. You had stayed.

His heart thudded when he felt your soft body press against his still, breathing softly, arms tangled in him. He made no move, allowing himself to embrace this for a few more hours.

[one-in-lemillion]

God help me I’m thinking about Shidou Kirisaki again and I just. I love him. I’m gonna post my Reddit rant about what I think his “murder” is, so forgive me if it’s messy:

Shidou had a wife and two sons. Shidou is a triage surgeon, who specifically works in organ transplant. He seems to think his “murder” are multiple murders, more specifically that his victims are the braindead patients who he’d convince their families to pull the plug on, so he could use their otherwise healthy organs on other patients to help them recover.

But I don’t think that’s the case. His victim, depending on the view, is one of two people: his eldest son, or his wife. I’m leaning toward the latter.

But why is his eldest son in contention at all? Well, I have a theory. His first voice drama is called “Molech”, a Canaanite god infamous for his worship involving the sacrifice of children. What I think happened was, he was out one day, grocery shopping, while his wife and sons were out somewhere else driving, where they got into a horrific accident. His youngest son was killed instantly, while his eldest son and wife were left in critical condition.

Shidou, being a respected surgeon, likely tried to use his influence to help his family himself. In the second voice trailers, the corrupted audio says something along the lines of “don’t get in my way, or I’ll kill you.” I suspect he’s saying this to one of his colleagues, who is likely trying to steer him away from getting involved, because it’s generally bad practice for surgeons and doctors to get involved with their own families, as they’re too emotionally close to the situation.

So back to the Molech thing. I think what happens next is Shidou is presented with a choice: he can save either his son, or his wife. They both likely need organs transplanted, and being related, likely are compatible with each other. But their critical condition means that to wait for more donors could mean they both die. So, Shidou chooses to sacrifice his son, to save his wife.

This is supported in the Triage MV, where Shidou is seen handing his eldest son a tag, one that resembles the type seen on the toes of cadavers in the morgues, symbolizing that Shidou sentenced his own son to death. But that’s still not Shidou’s “murder”.

So Shidou’s wife receives her son’s organ, maybe a kidney, or liver, or whatever, we don’t know what. Could be multiple organs. And Shidou’s wife goes through periods of seemingly pulling through, and taking turns for the worse, as seen in Thrown Down by the flower Frankenstein standing up before falling apart again.

His first voice trailer, he says something along the lines of “now I understand what I’ve been robbing people of”. All this time, he’s been convincing families to pull the plug on their own braindead family members. But then it finally came the time for him to make that choice, and it destroyed him. He became suicidal, he came into MILGRAM begging for the death penalty, because he feels he has nothing left.

So Shidou does all this work to keep his wife alive, including sacrifice their own son to make it happen, but in the end, she still died. That is his true murder. The one he feels guiltiest over. He made the ultimate sacrifice, and it still didn’t bear any fruit.

I would like to say, I have a theory that guilt is ultimately what lands you in MILGRAM. It’s why Fuuta’s there and not any of his online friends, for example. So Shidou’s one true “murder” is the one that he feels the most crushing amount of guilt over. Because now not only did he lose both his sons, but also his wife, who he sacrificed one of his sons to try to save. Had she survived, it would have been at least a little worth it, but she died too, making his decision to sacrifice his son weigh even more on his conscience.

It’s also something to take note of that Shidou mentions in Molech how he’s happy Es is a child, because he only trusts a child to judge him. Because he feels as though his own son would judge him, for the choices he made. Shidou despises himself, because he sees himself as responsible for the deaths of 2/3 of his family unit.