#gay for you trope

[kacchanot-fucking-deal-with-this]

Bakugou secretly loving it when Deku calls him Kacchan is one of my top five favorite tropes of all time and it will never not be good. it's literally canon. and even if it wasn't you can't change my mind.

[sunderwight]

It's actually kind of hilarious to contemplate the prospect that the genre shift in SV means that Luo Binghe's harem go the queer route as well and start largely pairing off into lesbian ships with one another.

Mostly because of the sheer scale of Bingge's harem, and the fact that a lot of it was comprised of the members of politically influential families.

Can you imagine the freak-outs that various lords and kings are probably having over the fact that their daughters keep eloping with one another? The practical ones are probably going to be like, well, a political alliance is an alliance, welcome to the family Random Demon Princess! But a lot of them are probably going to be pissed that their bloodline's liable to die out, and that the perfectly suitable match (read: asshole cannon fodder Bingge did away with in PIDW) they arranged for their daughter got interrupted by some lady cultivator kidnapping her from her wedding instead. Imagining several prominent nobles in various realms furrowing their brows together and just being like, is it something in the water? Did some plant do this? Is it like it a cultural ripple effect, the Demon King is gay so now all the youngsters are too?

[waitmyturtles]

This post was crazy thought-provoking in a million ways, and I’ve been dying all day to get my hands on a keyboard to get some quick thoughts down. So much of what was discussed here by @absolutebl Sensei has been percolating in my head since I started the Old GMMTV Challenge, and especially since I penned last week’s review on TharnType (and I myself am linking to @bengiyo and ABL Sensei’s amazing reblogs here as well). 

I’m not going to add on ABL Sensei’s EXCELLENT round-up of historical analyses on the development of BL vis à vis, and maybe even in opposition to, the kinds of tropes on which early- and middle-era BL (can I call the late 2010s middle-era BL? Ha -- I just wanna get to a point in BL where we can start saying “po-mo BL,” ANYWAY, SHUT ME UP) were reliant on. Tropes like gay for you, dub con, etc.

I have had the LUCKIEST FORTUNE, THE VERY GOOD FORTUNE of being able to interact with some folks who have been here from the start of the BL journey -- ABL Sensei, @bengiyo , @so-much-yet-to-learn​, to name a few. All of your historical perspective has helped me to see the gray and very gray areas of how and why BL has taken the trajectories it has. ABL Sensei and @so-much-yet-to-learn helped me to understand that Kongpob saying, “I’m not gay, but I love you” to Arthit was likely designed as a way to clear GMMTV before Thai censors so that SOTUS could air. But that could have also been appealing to, say, centrist audiences who may not have been ready, in 2016, to hear a person just flatly say, “I AM GAY,” and move on with it. (And -- that’s why I found 2016′s Make It Right to be so INCREDIBLY PROGRESSIVE AND BRAVE -- because MIR didn’t shy away from that, and was the first show to really EMBRACE that risk, vis à vis Tee’s, Frame’s, and Yok’s very forward-presenting queerness.)

I think, related to the question posed above, the history I’m recounting here, and from lessons that I learned after last week’s TharnType review, I’d like to say this:

In the communications I engaged with after I posted my TharnType review, I got one or two nasty comments, that was it (thank goodness). And the comments had to do with making a generalist, across-the-board statement about how TharnType, and the stereotypes and tropes it presented, were “okay” -- as if the commenter was speaking for the general population.

Here’s the thing. Judgement is in the eye of the beholder. I made a strong point in my review that my opinions in my review WERE MY OWN. I did NOT want to make blanket statements about ANYONE ELSE’S OPINIONS and/or joy towards TharnType. As an Asian, I needed to point out what *I* saw was problematic about the show. But as the very lovely @solitaryandwandering​ wrote in the comments, I ultimately didn’t want to yuck someone’s yum.

And -- what I heard in some private messages was a love for TharnType. And fuck -- who am I to judge? What I was MOST IMPRESSED BY was that I saw people ACKNOWLEDGING the problematic nature of where *I* thought M*ME was coming from, AND ALSO OWNING that they liked dub con.

That PERSONAL and accountable OWNERSHIP of what people liked -- all while grappling with my review -- I found it an impressive experience.

So what I’d like to say to the person who posed the question above is: know what you like, be definitive about what you like. Take ABL Sensei’s advice and know where BL comes from -- the good, the bad, the ugly, the bigoted stuff, the biased stuff, the racist stuff, the colorist stuff, all of it. Go on YouTube and watch Perth Nakhun’s videos about the BL industry and culture. Learn about Thai and Japanese and Korean cultures -- try to learn about what Asian audiences (as ABL Sensei points out in the husband-wife piece) think about these shows. Try to read their feedback on Twitter and elsewhere.

But be personally accountable for what you like. And if you have guilt about it -- try not to equivocate on behalf of anyone else, or even on behalf of the art. Just own that you enjoy it and move on. I saw that after I posted about TharnType, and damn if I wasn’t impressed by people grappling with it. I’m not gonna condemn anyone, I don’t have the time for that. But I am impressed when fans take a deep dive into understanding or trying to interpret the INTENTION of what artists are trying to do (this linked conversation about ownership was just one of the BEST convos I’ve ever participated in on Tumblr). 

I condemn M*ME. Even if you condemn M*ME but you like her work (as ABL Sensei says above about TharnType), and you own it, then -- you’re good. It’s best to do that, instead of speaking for a general audience, because of anyone implicit or explicit guilt you might have in consuming this media.

Hi.

I was watching TharnType for the first time. I started wondering why people have issues with gay for you and wifey and other things like that. From what I'm seeing it isn't intended in a harmful spirit. It's not received badly in the show in context. I'm not just specifically talking about TharnType but just these tropes in general. I was wondering if someone, the writer/screenwriter, director, any actor or someone else said that they'd intended it as demeaning or in a bad way... I don't know if I phrased that correctly. But I guess I'm wondering what people are basing this on. Even UWMA's Pharm's entire demeanor. Before I watched it I'd read that he is too feminine and damsel in distress-y. But watching the show made me realize that he is traumatized. I noticed similar patterns with other shows as well. Is it audience interpretations?

BL Is a Mess of Really Damaging Stuff & You Probably Shouldn't Just Accept it

Because, if you do just accept it without thought, you're also being damaged. If you're gay, you're being taught a type of gayness that doesn't exist and will fuck up your expectations. If you're straight you're misinterpreting what an entire group of people are like (that's prejudice, FYI). And if you're somewhere in between you're learning really bad behavior patterns for your coming out and self actualization journey.

And no, I don't think you're capable of distinguishing fiction from reality, because you've just asked a question that patently demonstrates a burgeoning parasocial tendency. (And yes, parasolcial relationships can and do form with fictional characters. Why do you think I am so terrified by KinnPorsche fandom and shipper culture?)

Here have some education, first one is free:

Imaginary Friends & Real-World Consequences: Parasocial Relationships (YouTube video)

But also, if you don't want me to rant about this, and you just wanted to justify your questionable taste, you should stop reading right now. I get it, denial is great! Go sail that river.

Here I am talking about the good BL can do. That doesn't mean I'm blind to its flaws.

Still reading?

Okay, well, now you asked for it.

And guess what, I'm not gonna sugar lube coat it.

Consider yourself Drunk Type lying in a bed and I'm Tharn's big c*** shoving some dry BL reality into your a******.

Oh, don't like that image, do you?

Tough nuts.

Put yourself in my position. I don't wanna have to do this either.

Consider this a "BL narratives made me do it" post.

I'm not responsible for anything, I'm just an archetype.

I'll be your seme for today and you were all just "too cute" for me to resist and now you have to take some tumblr dub con...

But first:

Seme uke when it specifically conflates seme with "the man" and uke with "the girl" is old fashioned, anti-feminist, and anti-queer. Here's soem of where I talk about it, but I talk about it a lot.

Pharm is a blushing maiden archetype character, I talk about it and what that means here:

It's sex negative. And a lot of it stems from internalized misogyny and ties to something called benevolent sexism. It's pretty rampant in BL.

Yes I think Pharm's behavior can be perceived as traumatized, but that trauma is brought about by In's past actions and the fact that In was punished (BY THE NARRATIVE) not just for being gay but for being a self-actualized pro-sex uke character.

There is a distinction being made between critical discourse over narrative versus how the characters behavior makes an audience feel (within the immersive experience of the drama). So viewers care, others do not.

I very much get why someone might like TharnType (I did) but actually also, you might want to think about why you like it despite the messages the narrative is sending... You might want to think about not just the characters in their little perfect romance world together, but consider if you were in the position of either of those characters how you would feel or behave.

And NOW the Dub Con Portion of tonight BL party

Okay I was trying to be my usual semi-welcoming snark self but ya know what, let's be VERY FUCKING CLEAR HERE because I am jet lagged and tetchy....

We (the collective of BL critics here on tumblr) aren't always talking about WHAT is depicted so much as HOW it's depicted, and whether that HOW allows the WHAT to skate by without encouraging the audience to reflect on the damage the WHAT does to their own perception of what is romantic. What is queer. Or what is morally acceptable for decent human ineraction.

Like thinking, for example, that's it okay for Tharn to RAPE Type while he is drunk.

Why on earth is that okay? It's NOT OKAY. It's just NOT!!!!

Did Type ask for it?

Did he dress too sexy?

Was his skirt too short?

Was he too much of a jerk?

Did he want it anyway?

Did he not protest enough?

Did he protest too much?

You gonna make that call for him, are you? You read his mind (apparently the way Tharn can?)

But SERIOUSLY.

What if you were actually in Type's position? Roommates with someone you didn't like who molested you when you were drunk. At home. In your own bed. What if that roommate didn't look like Tharn? What if your roommate were the wrong gender or body type or age or familial relationship (!) for your preferences? How would you actually feel?

Because if you're okay with this, really okay for yourself, you have a strong kink and you need to seek out the appropriate community or you are signing up for a very abusive relationship and likely an early death.

Can't put yourself in Type's shoes/bed?

How about Tharn?

Are you the kind of human who would molest a drunk person just because you desired him? Her?

Because they're homophobic and you want to punish them with your queerness?

Because they were a jerk to you?

You always get back at people by raping them?

You an old white dude putting your hand down secretary's shirts because they're just "too cute to resist"?

Why should you have to resist taking what you want? Who cares that there is a whole other human involved?

Grabbing ladies by the pussy any chance you get and bragging about it, are ya? Or is it somehow different or less damaging because TT is dude on dude?

So, are you gonna justify taking what you want and violating another person because they're the same sex?

Now who's being "gay for you"? This is going all the way into DL closet case "it doesn't count if it's with a man" territory.

Because if you are any of the above 8, please block me right tf now. (And... do I have a world leader to recommend for YOU to get into a car with.)

GAH!

Fucking TharnType.

Anygay...

I talk about dub con here:

My initial post about TharnType is here, but more recently here's us having a whole ThanType discourse unpacking Mame among other things as part of the BL movement both as a genre and as a fandom:

and here's an important article on rape culture in Thailand

Gay for you talked about here:

Wife language talked about here:

I'm gonna go watch some BL trash that, hopefully, doesn't have any rape in it.

Fuck me (consentually) I am so tired.

I'd drink but I did too much of that already this week.

Maybe I need to eat something.

Don't troll me just block me.

For heaven's sake please.

(source)

[aurynsia]

Slim Pickins

James Potter x Reader

——————— ⋆☆ ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

Summary: You pine over your roommate’s friend from school at a party while he’s on a call with his ex…

Warnings: Miscommunication trope, slight hurt -> comfort, James is stuttering like a lovesick FOOL so good luck reading the dialogue, reader is referred to as a girl with she/her pronouns and presents femininely, Marlene being the greatest match maker of all time!

Word Count: 1.1K

Masterlist

A/N: “A boy who’s jacked and kind…”so, James Potter?

——————— ⋆☆ ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

Sitting alone at your roommate’s dinner party, you gazed longingly at the boy who poured a sudden dose of affection into your once-loveless world, a disgruntled frown pressed against your lips.

Only meeting a few weeks ago on a frantic night of music and drinking, Marlene had practically dragged you over to the tall boy with a grand smile spread across his bespectacled face.

You were so enamoured after your first introduction, you completely missed the way the boy - James - leaned tentatively over to Marlene to whisper words of admiration.

“Just like how you described…is it too early to ask for her number? So pretty…” the muttered compliments and queries were drowned out by the blasting music, assisted by your complete lack of self awareness as you pined over the way his hair tickled his neck when he leaned towards your roommate.

You had danced your way through the nerves, guided by the soothing rhythm of pumping bass and new beginnings as you formed a core memory with your roommate and new friends.

Tonight was a different story.

James stumbled around your living room, a few drinks too many compromising his composure as he rambled on the phone to his old girlfriend.

Marlene had told you all about James and Lily, king and queen of their grade, and the sudden end to their relationship after graduation.

While you were relieved to hear the boy was single, you couldn’t help feeling a tinge of jealousy as he rambled on about something excitedly, cheeks blushing and smile only growing wider.

You nursed your drink in your sweaty grasp, feeling the depressing effect of alcohol wash over you like a wave over the Scottish shoreline.

James passed subtle glances towards you, throwing his drink around in his hand as he spoke animatedly down the line to an undoubtedly amused redhead.

Your jealously sparked into unbridled envy, willing yourself to turn back time and dance carefree once again, grinning at the handsome new face as you crossed the dance floor blindly in your memory. You slumped in your seat, allowing your vision to blur as your eyes fell in your intoxicated haze.

——————— ⋆☆ ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

James was all but yelling down the line to his lover-turned-friend, gushing enthusiastically through a permanent smile. “Seriously, she’s so cute! I wish you were here to meet her, I think you’d really get along,” He rambled, glancing in your direction every second moment.

“Yes, Potter, I’m sure we’d form an unbreakable bond over shared experiences of being relentlessly pursued by you,” Lily quipped, voice laced with a lighthearted tease. “Oh, shush. You won’t have to deal with my antics anymore if this lovely girl has anything to do with it. I think I’m gonna ask her out tonight, Lils!”

Lily was the only person in the school-born friend group who moved too far away to attend any of Marlene’s late-night gatherings, only kept in the loop by drunken phone calls from the bustling London apartment.

She meant the world to James as one of his closest friends, so he assured her repeatedly that it was crucial she knew about his obsessive new crush before he made a move. Physical distance couldn’t stop him from updating her on every new development in the capital city, constantly obstructing the peace and quiet of her comforting cottage.

“Well, don’t let me keep you,” Lily sighed in partial satisfaction, but mostly in exhaustion at the late hour of the night. “Go get your girl, Potter.”

With that final encouragement, James passed on hurried farewells before hanging up on the past. Now, his gaze was fixed on his future. His cheeks heated at the sight of your soft face, eyebrows furrowed in drunken fatigue.

With a final breath of courage, he pushed through his chorus of friends, Marlene squeezing his shoulder as he passed in knowing encouragement.

Striding along the path of dirtied plates scattered across your dining table, he finally found comfort in leaning against the wooden surface just in front of your current seat.

——————— ⋆☆ ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

You stirred at the sound of a deep cough - James clearing his throat to gain just a moment of your attention. “Enjoying the party?” he laughed nervously, never one for small talk with a girl he fancied.

Your eyes winced as you forced your best, welcoming smile at the boy. “Yeah, I am, just uh- lost track of my drinking an hour or two ago…” you admitted, forcing your eyes open to meet James’ bashful gaze, feeling almost sinful at the pleasurable warmth that shivers through you at the sight of his golden eyes.

“So, listen- uh…Marls said you were too good for me and I can’t help but agree with her, I mean,” he shifted his weight to balance his drunken nerves, “you’re brilliant. But I promised myself I’d shoot my shot anyway.” He scrambled to sit beside you, abandoning his position against the table as you stared at him in wide-eyed disbelief, blinking in a fluster that successfully woke you from your alcohol-induced slumber.

“So, um…I really, really like you. You’re so bright and- and gorgeous, and I’m really quite obsessed with you,” he rattled with embarrassed laughter, “I thanked Marlene a thousand times over for introducing us, and I just can’t let an opportunity like this - with you - go to waste. So, with this liquid courage…” he shook the drink in his hand, “I was wondering if you’d want to grab dinner some time. With me. Just us.”

You might as well have called for “clean up on aisle your floor” because your jaw wouldn’t be lifted from the wood beneath your feet any time soon.

“I- I mean, yes! Of course! That…that would be great, James, really,” you responded on autopilot after stunned silence, lost in his lovesick gaze as you subconsciously leaned closer to his warmth. James lit up like a lamp at dusk, grinning ear to ear as you inched closer in unexplored yet familiar comfort.

“Brilliant.”

Your roommate and her friends watched on with smiling pride before leaving you to whisper and giggle like school girls sharing meaningless secrets, bathing in the light of blossoming romance over the candlelit remnants of dinner.

——————— ⋆☆ ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

[green-crocs12]

obikaka akatsuki kakashi au anyone? no? well have it anyway

[rainbowstickersandunicorn]

home girl is ready to fight toe to toe for her girl, much less her girl's mother

[expiredhydrogenperoxide]

oh nothing, just jegulus ‘accidentally’ swapping ties and watching sirius go absolutely mental trying to figure out how james ended up with a slytherin tie.

(he would have so many outlandish theories)

[laz-kay]

Later:

There was never a straight explanation for this🪐

Happy pride month to them, I guess🏳️‍🌈

[emotionallychargedtowel]

Thanks for starting this discussion, @nieves-de-sugui. I've been thinking a lot about the aspect of Tokyo in April Is... since the show concluded and your post and responses from @waitmyturtles and @wen-kexing-apologist have already helped me clarify some things for myself beyond the initial thoughts I put out there in my prior post.

I really appreciate the context from the TiAI manga here. I know that some folks have said that they felt that the series actually improved the story in some ways relative to the manga. For me, I definitely prefer the more ambiguous portrayal of Kazuma's sexuality in the series, but I think at the end of the day they're pretty similar.

As someone who's pretty new to BL/yaoi, the historical context you're giving here is also helpful. I had gathered that "gay for you" was a more prevalent trope in the past. But when you talked about about changes in terms of increasingly framing the trope, or story elements in the neighborhood of it, as "only attracted to you," that really resonated with me.

The other thing I got a lot out of from your post was the idea of Japanese media portraying characters who defy social norms without getting into specifics, particularly specific labels from a Western context. Those of us who have a Western cultural lens, like myself, are bound to look at things through that lens. We can still make meaningful interpretations that way. But we have to acknowledge that this places limitations on any analysis we do, particularly if we're trying to make claims about the creators of a show or book or claims about how it's likely to be seen by the main intended audience of those media texts.

None of that is new to me, though it helps to be reminded of it sometimes. But it can be harder to recognize that even the way a concept is engaged with could be a culture-bound. That something that reads to me as shallow or insufficient could be a valid, justifiably accepted way of engaging with a concept. (And after all, there's something to be said for not always having to delve deeply into these ideas in order to tell a story that touches on them. For one thing, it would free creators up to explore a wider range of ideas without always having to have a complete grasp of them.)

I do think that the Shonen Ai tradition of portrayals of "pure" love is connected here (with the caveat that I don't know much about that tradition firsthand). Part of the reason I think this applies is the fact that it dovetails so nicely with Kazuma's and Ren's first love story. They meet in junior high and have this strong connection from such a young age, so palpably strong that Kazuma's mother picked up on it and realized that if the two of them got together their relationship would be cemented for life. It's no wonder Kazuma's love for Ren seems to transcend identity categories, since he developed those feelings before he had even really formed that part of his identity--though, notably, Ren did have the self-awareness at that age to have already formed his.

It's easy to idealize this kind of love. It's no wonder reuniting with your first love, particularly someone you loved from a remarkably young age, is such a prevalent trope not only in BLs but in Asian dramas more broadly. For one thing, it's a fantasy about love being destined--in other words, about safety. If x person is destined from a young age to be my partner, then we really belong together (no need to worry about the road not taken or whether I'm worthy of you or you're worthy of me) and we're (seemingly) more likely to end up together. It sounds so secure.

This kind of destined love also lends itself to ruling out other partners. This aspect is rather depressing, I think, because it shouldn't detract in any way from the importance or intensity, or even the purity, of one person's love for another if they have had partners in the past. But there's no doubt about it, BL and yaoi stories love to portray couples who have only ever been with one another. Looked at from this angle, Ren's inability to have sex with anyone after his first time with Kazuma and prior to reuniting with him makes more sense. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth to think that this aspect of Ren's trauma experience might have been devised by the creator of the manga (I assume they introduced this plot element) in order to, in effect, have him save himself for Kazuma. But I think that may well be what happened. It's not directly stated that Kazuma hasn't been with anyone else in the meantime either, but it seems very likely. Again, love between people isn't actually better or more "pure" if they haven't had sex with anyone else. But moves that are made in a lot of BL media seem to imply that there's a belief that this does in fact reflect on the specialness of a couple's love for each other.

This gets me thinking about my own responses to stories of this type and my assumptions about this stuff in my own life. It's not a priority for me, when I'm looking at series I could watch or manga I could read, to find couples who haven't had relationships with anyone other than each other. It's not something I would seek out. But I have felt the appeal of that kind of story. It's a story element that supports the idea that a couple is fated to be together, which ties back in with the appealing aspects of destined love.

But what may be nearly as important is the fact that it sidesteps a whole category of relationship complications. There's nothing wrong with having exes. But it can lead to uncomfortable and messy situations. Anyone with a history of romantic and/or sexual relationships has run into some version of this. The existence of exes implies the possibility of comparison. Most exes have the potential to inspire either embarrassment (if my ex seems inferior to my current partner) or jealousy (if my ex seems superior or even equal to my current partner). It sounds so simple to just be with the love of your life without any of that baggage! I think there may be a larger significance to this as well. If the presence of exes imply comparisons, then without exes, it’s easier and simpler to claim that this love is incomparable.

I have no illusions about the fact that the "gay for you" trope is primarily motivated by homophobia. But there's another aspect of it that I think appeals to creators and audiences as well, and it's one I'm not immune to myself. That is the implication that if you would have to have really strong feelings for someone to make such an exception for them.

There's a version of this that's just as reflective of strong feeling but not homophobic, though--what if your feelings for someone were so strong that it caused you to awaken to a part of your sexuality that you had previously repressed? This is something that is actually true to the experience of plenty of people, including myself. I don't think you could say the same for "gay for you." This is an experience that could make for a really great romantic story. I can attest that when I had my bi awakening as a result of falling for a friend of mine, it was one of the most romantic experiences of my life. Why don't BLs/QLs tell these stories more often?

That said, there is a real-life version of "gay for you"--or in some cases, "straight for you"--except it doesn't involve the gross aspects of the trope. There have been people who were a 1.5 or a 5.5 on the Kinsey scale--mostly gay or mostly straight--who happened to meet a rare person from their less-preferred gender who they were so attracted to and such a good fit with that that person ended up being a life partner. I've only met one person who's had this experience. I took a couple of courses with the legendary Sandy Stone when I was getting my MA and she talked about this at one point. She self-identified as a lesbian for a big part of her life, but ended up married to a man later on. Cynbe was one of very few men she was attracted to, but he happened to be so right for her that they were very happy together. (Sadly, he has since passed on.) A story like Sandy's would also make a great QL if the sexual orientation situation were flipped. (We already have enough stories about mostly-gay people falling for someone of the opposite gender. Though I guess if one were actually handled sensitively and realistically that might actually be pretty cool too.) Again, why not tell a story like this one?

It's true that we could explain Kazuma's sexuality in terms of a specific sort of demisexuality. In some ways I really like that explanation. Some demi folks feel strong attractions to specific people. It's analogous to the kind of "rare case" phenomenon Sandy Stone went through. The only difference is that instead of being mostly gay with an opposite-gender exception or mostly straight with a same-gender exception, the sexuality that person experiences the majority of the time is being functionally ace, with exceptions where they're attracted to someone.

But I really don't like that we have to look for this kind of rationale outside the actual story. It would be really powerful if Kazuma's demi identity was named or even just elaborated on without a label. But in the absence of that, the demi explanation only gets us so far, and the opportunity for demi representation is lost.

I wanted to comment on one other thing you wrote:

Kazuma's character in the show has never really considered his sexual tendencies. As highschoolers Ren asks Kazuma is he would want to have a girlfriend and have sex with her, to which Kazuma gives what would be "the expected answer" according to society. I personally believe that Kazuma's train of thought might have been something like: "Boys are supposed to like girls, and it is expected that they want to have sex with them, so probably yeah I would want to have sex with my potential girlfriend in the future". To me he does not seem to have made any kind of introspection of his own feelings or desires, as he has never thought of it he gives the probably expected answer. So who knows? He might not be straight, but he does not seem to have really given it any thought.

You're correct, and this is significant. But I think it's important to note that this description applies to the vast majority of straight people. Under compulsory heterosexuality, we're straight (and allosexual! and monosexual!) unless one of two thing happens: either we're clearly aware of our queerness despite all the social conditioning we experience (this is less common among LGBTQ+ people I've known) or we go through some kind of revelatory experience, epiphany, or self-discovery process that uncovers our non-straight/allo orientation. For lots of folks, the figuring yourself out process even has multiple steps of this sort.

I'm sure there are actual straight people in the world. But I can't say I've ever known anyone--to my knowledge--who seriously explored their sexuality and turned out to be entirely straight. I may know some people who've had that experience and I'm just not aware of it, of course--maybe it's even the case for some mutuals reading this. But it's striking that in all of my 46 years, such a case has yet to come to my attention, while I've heard the "how I figured out my sexuality" stories of lots of my LGBTQ+ friends. Honestly, unless I hear otherwise, when I'm told someone is straight I put a little mental asterisk next to this label that stands for "as far as we know, for now."

I think it would make for a better story if Kazuma actually engaged in some kind of introspection about his sexuality. The fact that he doesn't actually feels like a pretty glaring gap in the story for me--that, or a somewhat unpleasant commentary on Kazuma's personality, if he's simply unwilling to take a look at that part of himself.

The last thing I want to comment on is something I brought up in my earlier post. I think it’s instructive to look at this aspect of Tokyo in April Is... in contrast to the use of the same trope (more or less) in Utsukushii Kare. Like I said before, I think part of what makes this work better for me in UK is the fact that the person who's only attracted to one other human being is a colossal weirdo. It helps make it clear that the subtext of the story isn't championing being like Hira when, well, it's clearly not a good idea to be like Hira in most respects. The other thing I mentioned previously is that when Kiyoi asks Hira about his sexual orientation, he tells him that he doesn't know what it is. It sort of seems like he wishes he could tell Kiyoi he has one of the standard sexualities. But he honestly doesn't know. This stands in strong contrast to Kazuma's blanket dismissal of the relevance of sexual orientation for him.

I guess Kazuma's rejection of labels could have some kind of justification. Sexuality as an identity is arbitrary and imperfect. Outside of compulsory heterosexuality, we wouldn't have to label ourselves as not-straight or be assumed to be straight. But I think in Kazuma's case this is clearly avoidant rather than, like, some kind of radical anti-labeling stance. It reminds me of how, when I was growing up, if a queer celebrity wanted to avoid questions about their sexuality, they'd invariably say something like "I just don't get why we have to label everything." (I still remember being crestfallen when I read an interview with R.E.M. in high school and Michael Stipe pulled this move.)

Well, now I've stayed up way too late spouting off about this. I hope it's useful to somebody. I have to say that I still see a lot of value in Tokyo in April Is..., I just think this is one of its most notable weaknesses.

A Gay For You trope conversation

This is a thought that has come to me after reading the manga of Tokyo in April is...

First, I gotta say the show was a very good adaptation of the manga imo. There are some details that are different but overall the spirit of the story is the same, and I praise the makers of the show for it. Great job, folks 😎👍

Secondly, onto the topic of this post. I am definetly not the first to talk about this, @heretherebedork talks about it in this post. And @emotionallychargedtowel also touched upon this on another post. But I want use this post to gather both thoughts and expand on that conversation.

As I was reading the scene with Kazuma and Ryunosuke facing each other, a thought came to me. The manga really does go more into the Gay For You trope than the show does. When Kazuma says that he doesn't care about gender, that he's only interested in Ren, in the show there is still some possibility left for Kazuma to identify as some type of queer, however it goes a little differently in the manga.

read from right to left, from scanbean's scanlations

Both in the manga and the show Kazuma rejects any label and it could be said that he basically describes himself as "Ren-sexual". However, while in the show it's left more ambiguous (since being bi could still be a possibility) in the manga he rejects both the gay and bi labels. He does not confirm being heterosexual either, so it doesn't fall a 100% into the gay for you trope.

The Gay For You trope (for those who might not know it) is basically a straight main character being in a homosexual relationship while maintaining their heterosexuality. While this has been a trope widely used in Japan, it is true that recently it has been more of a "only attracted to you". So while they do not identify with any queer label they do not declare their heterosexuality as sternly as before. Even though this in a gay relationship but still straight most likely stems from homophobia, this recent shift in Japanese BL makes for an interesting conversation.

In the posts I mentioned above Heretherebedork describes this as some kind of demisexuality. And Emotionally Charged Towel ponders upon if this might be related to the early Shonen Ai idea of "pure" love.

I feel like Japan has a tendency to explore situations "out of the norm/societal expectations" without diving into the specifics. Scratching the surface of themes that step away from heteronormativity while not really diving deep into it either. There's a duality of characters that might or might not use western labels to understand themselves or their feelings. We can see this in how Koisenu futari talked about asexuality (very specifically) VS how Me, My Husband And My Husband's Boyfriend talked about polyamory (quite ambiguosly).

Personally, I wonder if there's something there to be said about how we understand romance and sexuality. Can sexuality and romance be separated succesfully without erasing the importance of one another? Are these characters that do not define themselves according to sexuality constructive in some way?

In the case of Tokyo is April is... Kazuma's mom refer to Kazuma and Ren's love as exceptional ("I have never experienced a love like that"). Kazuma's character in the show has never really considered his sexual tendencies. As highschoolers Ren asks Kazuma is he would want to have a girlfriend and have sex with her, to which Kazuma gives what would be "the expected answer" according to society. I personally believe that Kazuma's train of thought might have been something like: "Boys are supposed to like girls, and it is expected that they want to have sex with them, so probably yeah I would want to have sex with my potential girlfriend in the future". To me he does not seem to have made any kind of introspection of his own feelings or desires, as he has never thought of it he gives the probably expected answer. So who knows? He might not be straight, but he does not seem to have really given it any thought.

I like the idea of it being a sort of demisexuality.

It is intersting to consider if sexuality and romantic love can be explored separatedly. Could the use of this kind of ambiguity open the door to an new interpretation of romance? Much in the way of the yaoi concept of "pure love"?

This are the questions that have popped into my brain regarding the possibilities of the tropes. I hope it makes for an introduction or starting point to a more developed conversation of the topic.

I hope some of this stirs up thoughts on those that know a lot more than me about these topics, and are so much better at explaining them. I'd love to read whatever @bengiyo @waitmyturtles @wen-kexing-apologist @emotionallychargedtowel @heretherebedork and anyone else that sees this might have to say about it :) ...if there's anything to say at all

[fiendishartist2]

theres smth so romantic about the lackey. let me wait on you hand and foot because i want to see you succeed, because i believe in your cause and your ability to reach your goals, even if we fail every single time. you dont have to give me anything, being around you is reward enough. it doesnt matter if youre a good person or if you have good intentions, in my eyes youre everything the world needs. let me beat that guy up for you sir

[cissa-calls]

"CONGRATULATIONS MY LOVE - I'm sorry I didn't have a ribbon for you to run through."

No matter your thoughts on the shift in dynamic between Agatha and Rio in this last battle, you CANNOT deny this line. It is so laced with bitterness and yearning, it brings me to tears caught between hilarity and absurbness, and grief and sorrow over change. THIS is how you write the complicated twist of passion that never died, what it warps and turns into and finally bursts out as. An eruption left in the wake of wanton waiting that says: If I cannot have you, you will have to notice me, remember me. You WILL remember me.

[smolerthanthediagram]

The fact that my partner keeps telling me that Jayce and Viktor simply teleported to a nice grass field far from runneterra to comfort me and make me happy

[napping-sapphic]

Sooo NONE of you want to fall deeply unhealthily in love with me rn……?

[seagreenstardust]

What’s wild is that you can write a story that revolves around two male characters and make it sibling-coded or as obviously platonic as you want, but Hori didn’t do that. Right up until the finish line he fed the bkdk’s when given the choice.

He didn’t have to give Katsuki an 11+ year hang up about holding Izuku’s hand. He didn’t have to make Izuku so possessive, or have him go feral anytime Katsuki was looked at wrong. He certainly didn’t have to give Izuku the “I’m gonna hurt your loved one to hurt you” trope or have Katsuki use Izuku’s kiddie nickname for himself in front of the biggest bad.

He gave Izuku the “control your heart” complex that centered entirely on Katsuki

He had Katsuki literally die and come back to life thinking only about Izuku

He gave them the big eyes-meet-across-the-battlefield moment and that voiceover about how their feelings were finally one

At every opportunity, right up until the epilogue chapter, Hori chose to write Izuku and Katsuki like you would the main hero and heroine in any action story and it worked

[arcanegifs]

cmon you guys stop it with the garen hate smh his lines with Kat in LOR are so fucking funny ksdjfksdjfksdjfks

If you really want more lesbiabs in League you can also watch/read Leona and Diana!!!!!!!

DOOMED YURI SAVE US ALL

[vianbarnes]

my buddie going canon ideal scenario and why it could happen before eddie fully realises he’s gay

i’ve been cooking up this scenario for a while now but before going into it i wanna clarify that i don’t think eddie’s homosexuality is tied to buck and just that. i could write a full essay about eddie’s queerness without even mentioning buck. HOWEVER i do think buck could be the key to eddie’s discovery, the last puzzle piece that makes it all make sense.

narratively speaking, i think it could be interesting to see buck and eddie get to the same conclusion (that they’re in love with each other) but in the complete opposite way. while for buck it’s oh shit i’m bi > oh shit i’m in love with eddie, for eddie it would be oh shit i’m in love with buck > oh shit i’m gay. and obviously eddie is starting his own journey just now, so he might realise he’s gay and then it could click for him that all he’s been looking for was there all along, but i do think that - since this is a tv show - it would be interesting to offer a different side of the story to the audience. and yes i know that buck’s queerness and eddie’s queerness are very different already, but i’m specifically referring to their storylines leading up to buddie. (also this is just a personal side note but i think i would be lowkey crazy to have both of them realise they’re queer and still not understand their feelings for each other, like i know they’re dumb and dumber but c’mon!!!)

ok so now let’s put on the tinfoil hat

we literally know nothing about what’s gonna happen in the next episodes so i don’t have any solid theory on how we could get to this scenario. some of the interviews were teasing some potential tension (or angst even) between buck and eddie so my brain took this information and ran with it. a lot of us were also theorising a nde for buck, for eddie or for both of them at the same time and that could also be the setup for what i’m thinking.

but first let’s analyse where buck and eddie are right now (and in the upcoming episodes)

buck was just broken up with so now he’s trying to explore his sexuality and understand it more. it feels like the search for “his last” has just started and he’s excited to look at relationships and love through a new lens, but he also might feel a little discouraged that he has to do it all over again. he might be thinking “now that i have all these new possibilities, why is it still so hard to find my person?” (average bisexual experience i will tell you that much).

eddie on the other hand is slowly trying to forgive himself and love himself, accepting joy and not pushing away his desires and needs. allowing himself to feel certain feelings and just let go. he’s taking small steps to show up for himself just like he does for his loved ones every day (we still don’t know how far they’re gonna go with his story so the next episodes are definitely gonna be interesting)

so, with all that being said, here’s how buddie could go canon:

it’s late and buck shows up at eddie’s house. they’re in the kitchen drinking a beer, both leaning on the counter and not looking at each other at first. something has happened between them that they need to clear up (could be an argument, a fight or some very important words exchanged when they thought they were about to lose the other).

as much as i love a “because i love you!!” screamed during an argument, i don’t see that happening in this scenario. i imagine them having the softest, most honest and open conversation where they lay it all out - without even realising what they’re doing. at some point, buck is gonna say something that will make it finally click for eddie. if it’s an argument he could say something like “i need you in my life”/“i want you in my life forever”, or if this happens after a nde he could say “i can’t imagine my life without you”/“i don’t know how i could live without you” (i’m not a writer but you get the gist lol)

and that’s when eddie finally allows himself to feel what deep down he’s been feeling for years, and so he leans over and kisses buck. the kiss is pretty short: eddie pulls away almost immediately, as if his body was possessed by something and he just snapped out of it. buck can’t believe what just happened, but it takes him just a few seconds to realise and to grab eddie’s face and kiss him back. they start making out, they go out of frame, the screen turns black, the episode is over.

now let’s talk about the aftermath of the kiss. because if we know 911 we know that this goddamn show can’t let people just be happy so of course there’s gonna be some angst and miscommunication.

after the kiss, they don’t really talk about it. they might even get interrupted by something else (maybe eddie has to go to texas to get chris back?) so they have to postpone the what the fuck just happened conversation. and that’s when both of them start to spiral, but for different reasons. buck of course thinks that eddie’s distance means that he regretted the kiss, that they got caught up in the moment but that he doesn’t feel that way about him and he basically ruined their friendship. eddie is also freaking the fuck out: he’s panicking about how they could make their relationship work, how they could tell christopher, he’s questioning literally his whole life and past relationships like oh my god have i been gay this whole fucking time??, he’s worried about their jobs, how they’re gonna tell bobby and the others. basically questioning everything but buck.

being the idiots that they are, they’re gonna convince themselves that the other regretted everything and they’re gonna avoid each other and never have that much needed conversation. the 118 obviously notices that something is off, but no one knows what it is. until hen and eddie finally talk and he tells her everything: what happened, what made him panic and doubt everything and what’s stopping him from talking to buck. hen is shocked but not necessarily surprised. her and karen look at eachother (yes karen is there too because of eddiekaren bestfriendism that is very real to me) and then hen says something like “i don’t have the answers to all of these questions, but i’m sure of one thing: you love him and he loves you. you can figure out the rest together. go talk to him” (i think it would be nice for eddie to have this conversation with henren as a couple, since his biggest fears and concerns are about how they could make the relationship work)

eddie feels like he just woke up from a 20+ year long sleep. he runs out of hen’s place, hurrying to his car, and from now i’m picturing a full romcom montage with him just fighting for his life to get to buck’s apartment: traffic, construction work so he has to take a detour, his shirt is drenched in sweat so he has to go back home to change because surely he can’t show up at buck’s looking like that. once he gets home, he sprints to his room to find a new shirt (maybe he puts on too much cologne - the one buck likes - and he has to change again. just because it would be fun to see him in distress). he fixes his hair for the 100th time, grabs his keys, finally opens the front door and stops in disbelief. buck is on his doorstep, hand mid-air about to knock. they look at each other and in that moment they just know. they both lean in and go for the kiss aaand BUDDIE CANON !!!! (+ the buck at eddie’s door parallel finally having the romcom resolution it always meant to have)

of course i have no clue how we could get there, but i do feel like it would be true to the show if they didn’t immediately get together and if there was some angst between them. i hope that once they get together they won’t try to break them up (even just temporarily) so they might have to go through some shit at the very beginning of their relationship for that to happen.

alright tinfoil hat OFF folks. i always try to stay consistent to the show and only come up with theories that i could truly see being developed and i don’t think any of this is unrealistic. buuut i’m still a clown so who knows. quite frankly i’m fine with buddie canon either way (as long as their first kiss is initiated by eddie and it happens in his kitchen <3)