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sometimes i look in the mirror and i’m like surprised and then i wonder what i expected to see. cuz like. How would I even look walking around??? am i rolling?? walking on my antennae???? Resting my 183 pounds on some thin rods???? do i give up and float????? i have literally no clue. I was not made to experience gravity in this way. Like what the hell
#nonhuman#alterhuman#holoantik#holoinanimus#holothere#for finding similar folk ->#objectkin#otherkin
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Vanny finally meets FNAF tape girl in person...
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf vanessa#fnaf vanny#tape girl#fnaf tonya#fnaf help wanted#security breach#fnaf fanart#TAPE GIRL MENTIONED AGAIN 🔥🔥#A good handful of folks asks me if I’d draw Tape girl and Vanessa meeting#I THOUGHT it was a fun idea and finally got around to it#my thought process here is Vanny was hunting tape girl down#mean she wants to find the person who gave her this virus after all#just to say thank you I promise :-)#she’s either being genuine or sarcastic when she says it ‘helped her a lot’#probably similar to the Mike deal can’t bring herself to actually harm tape girl#I like the name Tonya for tape girl it’s one of her maybe names and I think it fits#shout out to toxic fnaf yuri…
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Fun fact! This was the real tipping point that made Edgeworth run away after AA1, they just couldn't show it on screen because they didn't have the rights to Chappell Roan's music <3
(A spiritual successor to my "Hot to Go" joke from this post. Image description under the cut below)
[Image ID: a four page black and white comic of characters from ace attorney.
The Judge stands solemnly at his podium holding a gavel "Mr. Miles Edgeworth, you are on trial for the murder of blah blah blah..."
A cheerful Maya Fey leans over to Miles Edgeworth, who is staring straight ahead and looking very concerned
Maya: "Psst! Mr. Edgeworth! If you win your trial, can I show you Chappell Roan?
Miles: "What the hell, sure." Internally he thinks "Oh God I am going to jail"
A box saying "later" in the top corner of the next panel marks the passage of time.
The Judge smiles as he says "I declare you... Not Guilty!"
We see a full body shot of Maya dancing excitedly while Miles looks on, emotionless
Maya: YIPPEE omg you're going to LOVE this
Miles internally thinks "oh no, the consequences of my actions.
We see Miles standing in between Phoenix Wright and Maya looking apprehensive. Maya beams in excitement, while Nick puts a reassuring hand on Miles' shoulder
Miles: Alright, so what is this exactly?
Nick: She's a pop musician Maya really likes
Maya: You promised you'd let me show you, and it's legally binding because you said it in a court room!
Miles: That is not how the law works Ms. Fey
Maya: Shh just listen!
We see a panel of Miles' pensive face concentrating as he listens to "Hot to Go". He thinks to himself "hm".
Another panel zoomed in more. His pensive expression has grown more tense/confused as he listens to "Red Wine Supernova". he again thinks to himself "Hm" in a larger thought bubble.
We zoom out again to see Nick, Miles, and Maya standing together again. Miles stares forward blankly, eyebrows raised. Maya excitedly leans in.
Maya: Ok, that's her whole discography. So! What did you think?
Nick looks at him, waiting for his response
We get a panel of Miles, looking bewildered. He starts to speak "I..."
We cut again to see the three of them standing together.
Miles: I... don't think I like women?
Miles looks shocked and confused. Nick is bent over laughing, using a hand on Miles's shoulder to support himself. Maya looks outraged and appalled!
Maya: MR. EDGEWORTH! Just because you don' like her musi it doesn't give you an excuse to be sexist!
We see a panel of Miles looking stressed and confused. He leans his head on one of his hands, which messes up his hair, showing how he isn't his normal put together self.
Miles: I should rephrase that. What I mean is, Ms. Roan is clearly VERY assured in her feelings towards women. I was... unaware that anyone felt that strongly. I thought we all viewed these things with a vague sense of distaste and unease but collectively ignored it. Like how we do with climate change.
We zoom out again to see the three of them. Miles stands in the middle looking deeply uncomfortable and lost in thought, vibrating with unease. Nick and Maya exchange deeply concerned glances across from him.
With lingering unease, Miles begins to walk away.
Miles: Well, I should be going then. Goodnight.
Nick hesitantly raises a finger to point out an inaccuracy in that statement
Nick: It's four in the afternoon-
he gets interrupted by Miles who repeats firmly: I said Goodnight
Nick looks in the direction Miles walked off in.
Nick: ...He'll be ok, right?
Maya reassures him: Of cours Nick! I mean, what's the worst that can happen?
Jump cut to a closeup of Nick's hand holding Miles' letter which reads Miles Edgeworth chooses death in all caps. Then, below in smaller font, it says Also femininomenon was really good, thanks.
We see a panel of Nick glaring wordlessly at Maya as he holds the letter in his hand. Maya leans against the wall and looks away, whistling, trying to look innocent to avoid blame.
As a bonus, we also have a page that takes place a year later. Miles and Nick stand talking. Miles looks calmer now, and Nick smiles encouragingly.
Miles: In my time in Europe, I've been examining myself and my approach to law. Ultimately, the most important focus must be justice. We owe it to ourselves and to the people we serve
Nick: Wow, that's really inspiring Edgeworth. And, uh, hows the... the other thing going?
We get a zoomed in panel of Miles glaring menacingly at a suddenly nervous Nick
Jumping out again, Miles turns his back to Nick as he continues to talk
Miles: So as I was saying, justice is truly so important...
Nick nervously rubs the back of his neck wearing an awkward expression as he sweats nervously. He thinks to himself internally "Ooookay then, clearly still working through some things there"
/.End ID]
#Miles can handle horrifying truths about the death of his father and the nature of his guardian#but he draws the line at questioning his sexuality!#also. serious moment for a second#I think we focus a lot on moments of queer discovery stemming from attraction to the same sex#like that being the moment of panicked “oh no I'm different”. Which makes sense and is valid!#But I think it's also compelling to explore the opposite but similar twist in your gut that is:#oh my god I don't feel anything in this situation where others do. oh no something something is wrong with me#and this is something that gay and lesbian people have in common with ace and aro people!#I feel such tenderness and kinship to everyone who has been in that situation#and it's why i will never understand why aspec folks are pitted against gay or lesbian representation#we are drawn to the same characters bc we had such similar experiences and isn't that lovely that we can find solace in media?#so NO FIGHTING. We should all be BEST FRIENDS. my brothers in arms. I'd die for you.#all that is to SAY: I personally read edgeworth as asexual and like demiromantic/gay.#but YOU can read him as just gay in this comic if you want <3#Also. i just thought it would be funny if it took a lesbian to make him realize he didn't like women#I think he would have no clue how to react to chappell roan. Same vibe as giving a victorian orphan a baja blast and a crunchwrap supreme#ok sorry shutting up now#ace attorney#ace attorney comic#ace attorney trilogy#gyakuten saiban#phoenix wright#naruhodo ryuichi#miles edgeworth#mitsurugi reiji#maya fey#ayasato mayoi#my art
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I think it's so relatable to see trans women and transfem and generally people who no longer have a testosterone-dominant system describing what it was like to have a testosterone-dominant system. I find that often, when they talk about being angry, depressed, irate, or just irritable, I relate because that was me before I went on testosterone. I was so fucking angry and irate and genuinely unpleasant to exist around because I didn't have testosterone.
See, I think instead of estrogen or testosterone being the "bad, angry" hormone, it's more like... of course trans people who need hormones are going to be unpleasant before getting hormones - both your body and your brain require that you have a certain level of hormone balance. Of course somebody like me was fucking furious all the time, the brain does weird shit when its needs aren't fulfilled!
This isn't about criticizing any one group of trans people, rather, I encourage people to remember that ascribing inherent qualities to certain traits (e.g., saying "estrogen is such a horrible hormone!") isn't necessarily good. It's absolutely fine to talk about personal experiences with pre-transition, I do that all the time! The only issue is bioessentializing hormones, in essence, ascribing inherentness to traits we often share.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#this is not to discourage people from expressing negative things about their being pre-transition - again that's not what i mean#i talk very negatively about my experiences being pre-transition because it WAS negative. i suffered every day pre-transition...#...but i still look at people going in the direction i ran away from like a man on fire and i find peace in it...#...because that means my experiences weren't horrible for *everyone*. there is something worth it to other folks...#...so i feel as though i have less personal responsibility for Upkeeping Order or whatever...#...somebody has HAPPILY taken over my shifts and i have perhaps taken theirs with similar enthusiasm...#...and that doesn't mean any of it is Inherently Bad
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for anyone who has ever seen someone claim pansexual was coined on social media by teenagers in the early 2000s, the 2010s, and even in the past few years, and believed it or wondered if it’s true, or known it’s not true and been annoyed by the misinformation, this article is for you!
after listing out all of the claims i’ve seen, i succinctly debunk them by laying out a brief overview of pansexual’s history dating back to the 1960s, both as a term generally indicating universal appeal/inclusion and a term indicating sexual freedom/attraction to all genders. i include a look at pansexual’s use specifically within queer spaces, with a focus on bisexual spaces, as well.
i also touch briefly on omnisexual and polysexual existing in similar contexts to pansexual dating back to the 1960s. and finally, i discuss a little bit about how when, where, and by whom a label is created doesn’t determine the validity or usefulness of it, because these claims come with the implication that new labels, labels created by kids, and labels originating on social media aren’t legit forms of queer expression and identification.
happy pan week! 🥰💗💛💙
#pansexual#pansexuality#pan pride#pan positivity#pan week#medium#text#mine#and as always please remember that queer people have always played with language#and tweaked it until it worked for us and utilized what we felt seen by#and filled in the gaps with our own creations where we didn’t feel understood and left the rest#queer people expressing themselves in a way that feels authentic to them is always a good thing#truly don’t understand why the when where and by whom a label was created would matter more than someone feeling seen by a label#because while we’re talking about new labels made by kids online with regard to pansexual#so much of queer language has been reclaimed or repurposed from completely different (and often bigoted) origins#and people barely even acknowledge it. but suddenly the origin is crucial when it’s a label folks have a vendetta against#and listen. learning history is fun and important but we aren’t beholden to it.#we can have new meanings and uses and completely new words!!! it’s fine!!!! it’s not that serious!!!#maybe one day pansexual will fall completely out of use and people will find a different word to express it or something similar#and that’d be fine. and maybe one day after that someone will come across an old post about pansexuality and decide it speaks to them#and it will all happen again. and that will be fine. language is like that. self-identification is like that.#y’all take all of the fun and joy and excitement out of finding or creating language that perfectly captures how we feel#and then finding a community of people who feel the same way we do#y'all focus so much on the parts that don't matter. find your language find your people that's what matters#not finding something to use against someone else who feels seen by a word you don't feel seen by#anyways. pansexual isn't new. stop spreading lies because you care too much about things that don't matter
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The way Azirphale is underestimated and practically infantalized by heaven is so closely tied to his femininity and I think we should talk about it more because I just want to shout about how relatable the way he's treated in his workplace is as a woman working in a traditionally male field
It's in all the little niggling comments from your boss about personal things that hold no bearing on your work
and the assumption that what you're doing must be simple if it was assigned to you
your work is trivialized
and you get these the placating smiles when you're told plans and proposals are rejected and passed over
or when your complaints are dismissed
and you get more of the same from upper management
it all feels so frustrating and draining but you're at work so all you can do is take a breathe put on that mask and move on with your day
It is all so deteimental to your emotional well being and textually, so much of this is tied to Aziraphale's softness, his gayness - his femininity
The thing about working in an environment and gives you this feeling - of being simultaneously destrought watching your belief in yourself get chipped away but also just so irate becuase you know you don't deserve it - is how it builds. It sinks under your skin and feeds into this indignant dejection until you can have a moment of release - but Azirphale doesn't get to bitch about it over drinks with friends, he doesn't get a lunch break where he can go for a walk and listen to an angry scandi death metal playlist, he doesn't even get the chance to cry about it in the bathroom for 5 minutes before confronting it again
(And I talked a little bit about it in the tags of this beautiful photoset but this all comes into play whenever Crowley dismisses his plans or calls him an idiot. These are purely emotional reactions; I really don't think Crowley means much by it - he respects Aziraphale's opinion and genuinely thinks he's brilliant - but Crowley is so quick to use this terminology when Aziraphale is making a decision Crowley thinks is wrong and he doesn't know how much this hurts Aziraphale. Just like Aziraphale doesn't understand the true impact the Fall had on Crowley, Crowley doesn't understand the ways heaven has been tearing away at Aziraphale's self worth)
Aziraphale has been facing this constant drip of denigration since before the beginning of time and has never released the pressure valve. At this point, he's a bomb waiting to go off
#(I want to note that I am coming at this from my personal experience as a woman#but I know femme neurodivergent and disabled folks of all genders face these same issues)#along similar lines I have tons of feelings about how often Aziraphale hides his hands when talking to other angels#to hide his stimming#and look I try not to tie everything back to explaning why Aziraphale ended s2 the way he did but apparently I can't#its just the juiciest character moment to me#also thinking about how angry Crowley was at Gabriel when he was treated like this once#granted shut up and die already IS the worst thing Gabriel has said to Aziraphale but if Crowley knew how much of this was going on...#aziraphale#good omens#go2 spoilers#good omens meta#Thanks to folks who responded to my tags on that post because you really motivated me to find these screen caps#and finish this post which has been sitting in my drafts for ages#also sorry so many of gabriels faces are funny I cant help that jon hamm is comedy gold - i refuse to let it undermine my point
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Bout that essay titled 'A study of Gortash's twisted love of humanity'- yk what fuck it here goes nothing. Back into a facists megalomaniacs mind we go. Spoiler; this is long.
But first of all; let's do a thought experiment. Let's just assume, for shits and giggles, Gortash's position would've somehow been swapped with any other the other chosen or another Banite:
Let's start with the Banites: if we had gotten anyone except for Gortash Baldur's Gate would've been fucked. Like genuinely. Banites are cruel, vicious, unashamedly gaudy (they suck ass at infiltration missions) and they exploit loopholes perhaps even better than fiends. Any other Banite would've simply reveled in the fear caused by rampant myrkulites and bhaalists and probably stoked that fire by employing some of their own forces. And depending on whether the Zhents join the winning side or not they would've probably used and abused the black network to absolutely dominate trade and potentially choke out every non desirable in the city itself by fun activities such as grand scale slavery, starving an entire city, or simply employing enough mercenaries and some Bhaalist to get the job done. Banites fuck everyone over so hard they usually don't even stop at themselves, and prideful cruel beings who know absolutely no bounds in their desire for power commonly don't hesitate, especially not Banites who thrive in backstabbing. So the other chosen and the grand design are fucked cuz they will most certainly get removed for the sake of someone more desirable the second they somehow irk Banes favourite toy. Which in some specific cases (all of them) would be in 5 minutes flat. If you thought the local nobility was bad just wait until you see a Banite in their natural environment.
Ketheric: Yeah Baldur's Gate is fucked. Ketheric cares about one thing and one thing only; Isobel. And he employs a bunch of sadistic necromancers who have no concept of personal boundaries or consent for that matter, so chances are he'd let them roam freely in Baldur's Gate, making the streets a huting ground for his followers to find prime subjects to perform inhumane experiments on all while he turns a blind eye; either busy trying to get Isobel under his (mind-) control, reviving her or treating a brainless puppet that looks and once was his daughter like his one true solution to decades of grief and fucking up. He wouldn't care about what happens to the city, to the other chosen or even the grand design. He'd follow his gods orders but thats about it and no matter whether that's still Myrkul or Bane; everyone's fucked cuz surpringly the guy who adores lichdom more than life and the other guy who'd rather 'burn everyone's fields than loose' aren't about to give out any orders that will benefit anyone but themselves.
Orin: Another great case of 'yeah Baldur's Gate is fucked'. Orin wants one thing and one thing only: recognition. Preferably from Bhaal but she'd take anyone at this point. The problem about this whole thing is, she's been conditioned and instilled with so much self-loathing my dearest murder princess can't even begin to realise when she's getting shown any sort of adoration anymore and immediately understands it as mockery, see, for example, her butler. Is what I would say if their corpse wasn't chilling in Durges old bedroom. All Orin would do is stage ever grander and more elaborate public massacres and involuntary 'anatomy displays'. Baldur's Gate wouldn't simply be fucked; give her a week, and the majority of it would be dead. This works well for Bhaal, but for anyone else, it would kinda suck. Including the other two of the dead three. And the cult would probably still loathe her simply due to her not being a true Bhaalspawn, so cue Orin's madness reaching an absolute boiling point. She doesn't and would never care for any of the other chosen or the grand design. Unless she's reigned in, she's a utterly loose canon, even more so than she was already, with Gortash or Durge at the helm, respectively.
Now time for my favourite of the reckless murder hobos; Durge. Given the few in game notes we have Durge had a thing for obliteration. Including but not limited to every living being + themselves. So let's just assume Gortash’s cocky upstart charm and Orins assassination attempt didn't work out as planned and they are still the de facto leader but now without any leash. Baldur's Gate is probably obliterated. Alongside whatever else remains of the sword coast. Or Troil. They'd probably also have some weird ass fuck relationship with the brain cuz they already did without being the undisputed leader. And the brain would probably discard the grand design themselves cuz somehow Durge has that effect on things (might be the innate charm magic of Bhaalist priests that they use to convince people to join a literal murder cult). Either way, with Durge not giving a single damn about the other chosen, any plans but Bhaals (or their misunderstood version of it) and a dramatic love for self-obliteration, it may finally be time to remedy the elves' mistake and rip Abeir-Toril apart properly. Ao hates this trick, alongside everyone else, probably including Bhaal himself.
Which is all my longwinded way of saying; Gortash is the lesser evil. In any set of circumstances he displays enough leniency, monster fucker vibes and rationality to somehow keep this ruined, sinking ship from hitting the sea floor immediately. He has enough of a twisted love for humanity left, compared to the others, to a degree that he doesn't blindly follow orders or actively seeks the destruction of everything, let alone 'true' domination the way Bane intends to have it.
But yes, indeed, Gortash performed fucked up and cruel experiments. No doubt about that. And yet it was still on a lesser scale than a mad massive hoard of necromancers could, and his experiments, for the most part, actually yielded results, didn't they? Presumably, the Coginator and the remote control brain mechanism used for the Steelwatch. After all, there are zombies(?) in there, controlling that shit. However, the experiments on loving families were probably one of his selfish indulgences and his sorry attempt at figuring out if he was just born loathsome and his family sucks ass or if that's normal and humanity doesn't deserve a second chance. Or a 30th. FR lore is fucked up.
This is also a great transition to exhibit B of my thesis why Gortash does in fact love or is at the very very very least heavily intrigued by humanity; the sole existence of the Steelwatch. Listen, my guy serves Bane. Bane hates planning. He likes immediate results. So much so he actively pisses off his situationship Bhaal for it. Repeatedly. And he likes fear and tyranny. So what do you think the chances are that the black hand would actually enjoy the thought of a mecha army patrolling the streets of Baldur's Gate, keeping them save, and worst of all, instilling hope in the hearts of the populous, peasants and nobles alike? Yeah, absolutely fucking none. And yet Gortash did that. And he's not even just a regular banite. He's Banes chosen. He carries a part of Bane's divinity within himself. He has the de facto highest position in the local faith. He's Banes favourite toy rn. He's the centre of attention and he still goes out of his way to use things that could 1000% inspire fear and hatred to sow fucking hope and a sense of safety of all things in plain sight? I bet his adorable wrinkly ass that Bane wasn't happy and that even a thousand rituals to redeem his leniency won't save him from getting tortured extra hard for this fuck up. And considering the state of the Banites scriptures we found, and his entire character, Gortash is smart enough to know this is something Bane absolutely loathes. And yet my guy did that.
Another thing is the hive mind. Bane would probably not hate it outright, as its still 'burning the fields' by turning souls illithid, but it's wasted potential. Because there's so many great things you can do with a hivemind and the remote control over people's thoughts and emotions, for example instilling fear and terror the very things Bane loves. But that's, once again, not Gortash plan. If the notes and one of the evil endings is anything to go by the hivemind doesn't trap people in a state of torment, it does the polar opposite. People are happy, enjoying a better, simpler and nicer life. Enjoying an idea of what their life could've been like. They're smiling, happy, enjoying a casual market stroll and the bountiful rewards of the fields. Which is all things that a good Banite should hate and never inflict on someone. AND YET that's presumably Gortashs plan. Create a hivemind where everyone can dream happily and do soulless labour without noticing it while the world goes to absolute shit but the people do not. It's basically noah's arc. It's paradise in hell. The people are 'saved' while the gods continue to fight their petty games, and Gortash alone lords over this perfect dream. Protecting it answer using it to advance further.
Now, about the busts found in his office. Most of them depicted rather unsavoury, cruel people. Except for one. Which honours a self made person who took pity on those who had less. On those considered lesser by the upright and honourable citizens of the Gate. It's weird how, between all those symbols and testaments to cutlery and tyranny, there's still a sliver of empathy, renegade justice and even care for fellow humans imbued, isn't it? And what's even weirder, all of them are found in Gortash's most private place? His own little office hidden far above the grandeur of the throne room and the Fortress, where he sits at the helm, lording over his subjects and scheming his little plans? This is an excellent example of show, don't tell btw. It's hitting you over the head with the implications. But just in case, this might very well be a reflection of Gortashs mind itself and the visible expression of him being incapable of letting go of humanity as a whole, still carrying it somewhere not even that well buried between the resentment and cruelty but out in plain view for everyone curious enough to touch it because what others reason would he have tob'play the benelovent ruler' in a place where no one sees it? Where only his most trusted and fellow Banites mingle?
And, ofc, as I am a durgetash truther, another exhibit. Him fucking Bhaals gore baby and putting a leash on it prematurely. You see, I've already talked about Banes likes and dislikes plenty so it should come as no surprise that the Edgelord Surpreme wouldn't hate carnage wrought upon foolish mortals by idiots who follow lesser gods than himself, since it would still somehow contribute to people being scared and panicking. But Gortash, being the ever faithful fuck up of a Banite, reigns in the Bhaalist and even the Myrkulites enough for that to kinda never really happen. He stopped the carnage from happening altogether, in fact, by giving the others enough scraps to keep them satisfied and from acting out but not enough freedom to fuck up his plans. I mean, heck he was apparently so convincing he managed to get Durge, again, biggest fan of self-obliteration, from going on an apocalyptic rampage cuz 'daddy I like his brain and I don't mean for dinner'. Him doing that actively contributed to preventing another Bhaalspawn crisis, which could've very well happened with Bhaals resurgence and revival, 2.5 loose canons and no ward of a random old guy in sight. But also him providing a clear goal and orders for Ketheric kept the lich from giving in to the sweet release of just not caring at all whatsoever. Everyone had their designated roles and boundaries and that was perhaps the only thing keeping this group of mentally unstable creatures from unleashing an apocalyptic nightmare; which again would've worked in their gods favour and technically didn't need any prevention.
And about the Gondians... Yeah this is gonna sound fucked up, cuz it is, but Gortash is actually treating them exceptionally nice. Their families are actually still alive and its not just a lie he's telling them, we don't actually see anyone getting flayed, strung up or tortured in some other way outright, they actually get to wear clothes and presumably they're fed enough to a degree that most of them can still somewhat work and the collar and the threat of your head exploding does suck but he could've also simply chained them to their work stations but they aren't. Let alone use charms or other beguiling and fucked up magic to force them into complacency. And they're not being resold or redistributed or forced to serve some random ass guy. The Gondians are, from a Forgotten Realms and probably Bane's perspective, treated exceptionally well. As are their families. Still undoubtedly fucked up and kinda sadistic with the whole explosion collar but objectively speaking he's one of the nicer slave masters. And they do allow him to produce the Steel Watchers en mass which once again contributes to the overall safety of Baldurs Gate and its other citizens. Still the lesser evil.
Though to be fair; Gortash also did some things Bane would really celebrate. Like somehow cheating his way into obtaining the Iron Throne, fucking Bhaals favourite and most fucked up """"child"""" and of course, keeping his parents alive and in agony to eternally fuel Banes fear kink. Except, it's only Sally who's afraid. Dravo is basically a blue screen of death personified at this point. He's a hollow, numb husk, isn't he? So somehow this once again doesn't align with Banes goals and Gortash's duty as a Banite. He's fucked it up again. But Gortash could've also simply killed them if all he wanted was revenge. Why go out of your ways, program elaborate scripts into them, keep the very place that testaments his fucked up past in good condition? Because a quick death would be too merciful? But then why is he so quick to turn on Durge if they betray him in a much smaller scale than his parents did. Well, perhaps he chose not to simply kill the very people who prepared Belladonna in the kitchen when he came to visit because he himself still needs them. Because underneath all that rage and spite there's still a broken boy who wants to hear his parents, albeit empty praise, and who wants to prove to them that he can be better? That his useless playing around actually helped better humanity, that he himself helped countess people and made lives better when all they thought he'd be useful as would be a pawn?
So, is it twisted? Yes. Is it rotten? Absolutely. Is it anything you'd consider to be 'conventional'? Absolutely not. But he does hold some wildly fucked up 'love' for humanity, if only as means to a grander goal (that being himself, ofc) or perhaps cuz he's genuinely incapable of letting go. Whether it's that, to spite Raphael, Bane and his parents or someone else, who knows. Probably nobody. But the shit he does is unorthodox and oddly self-sacrificial in a way where I just can't go, 'yeah no he absolutely loathes the sheer existence of the concept'.
I still think it's a missed opportunity he's not trying to build a spelljamming port though. I feel like he would absolutely do that somewhere down the line, if only to limit the black networks influence.
#okay thx for reading enough madman ramblings#i am that meme#yk which one#thats how it looks inside my brain 24/7#also not to expose myself as a weeb but#gortash is literally the light yagami or eren yaeger of baldurs gate#becoming the lesser evil and a genocidal maniac so 'his' people may experience a moment of peace safety and respite#one might even say he shares similarities witn griffith or bondrewd#but i won't cuz i dont need a hatemob to find me#anyway thats it folks#i condensed it nd kept it as sane as i could#don't wanna hit tumblrs letter cap again#been there done that already#yk i could've spent this time working on my longfic and cultivating ideas of how gortash would simultaneously elevate and fuck up the city#if he lived through bg3 cuz i like that idea#but here i am detailing how deranged he is#oh well just gotta keep thinking about the toxic old man yaoi even harder now to make up for it#imagine me going on a madmans ramble like this but for my blorbo#and their fucked up relationship#i rly should do that one day#bg3#enver gortash#bg3 gortash#lord gortash#i just noticed i forgot the orphan pipebomb bit#more on that later ig#also why i'm at it his general approach is similar to calcazar but their motivations are still different#it's hard to put into words without me spinning the argument in my mind for a lil longer but yeah#wouldn't say they're on common ground
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#why do you need this many legs sir#toedscruel#woah holy shit i just looked outside and it's super dark out. i'm queuing this up at noon why is it so dark#lemme look#yeah it's. dark. there's a bunch of dark evil clouds in the sky lookin like it's gonna storm oh i just heard thunder yeah it's gonna storm#uh oh. good thing i'm queueing this guy up before the storm so my power doesn't go out. this happens frequently#anyway toedscruel. it's definitely an evolution of toedscool. it definitely looks like tentacruel#if it's a different pokémon why does it evolve into something so suspiciously similar. i can understand wigglet and wugtrio being#different pokémon. just based on how different they are from diglett and dugtrio. even though their names are a typo away#but this guy is. it. really should've just been a regional form‚ i think#unrelated‚ but on random occasions seemingly whenever someone new finds the blog and reads my tags#i'll occasionally get folks asking me how i type commas in the tags#the answer is that this character → ‚ ← is not a comma. it just looks identical to a comma because of tumblr's font#it's actually a lower quotation mark. so for a language that does ‚this kind’ of quotation marks#and i use it as a comma because i have a fancy linguist keyboard that can type all kinds of fancy symbols. and it's easily accessible#some of my favorites include the single-character ellipse: …#the degrees symbol: º and °#small A: ª#fractions: 1⁄2 2⁄3 1⁄4 etc#and obviously IPA symbols and various diacritics‚ so that i can type the word pokémon without having to copy-and-paste the E#currency symbols‚ too. £¢$§¥ euro is on here somewhere but i don't know where bc i don't use that one really#i just like being able to type things the way they're supposed to be. like it's 80º outside. the stopwatch costs 15¢ in the shop#and‚ of course‚ pokémon. it's the linguistics and computer 'tism combining together i think#it's storming harder now but i found the euro symbol: €#oh fuckin hell my lights just flickered. this is gonna be rough..!
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you guys do such amazing work!! if I may ask, how is it possible to start something like this in my own country?
thank you <3
that’s a complex question - there’s just so many factors! I’d say first it’s important to know if you’ve got a digital lending system available (like overdrive/libby or an equivalent) in your country and if it would play nice with non-profits or independent libraries. you’ve gotta have a team of folks who have the right skills: librarians, non-profits, tech, social media, etc.. I’m sure the technicalities of how non-profits function vary in different places so you’ll need to assess what works for you and how the systems available to you interact with each other.
#& you may have already done this#but truly the first step is try to find folks who are already involved in similar work#and I don’t want to be discouraging in any way but I do think it’s important to say#that for QLL we took about two years to plan and lay groundwork before we launched the library#100% work worth doing but it is a lot of work#asks
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Sizzy 🤝 Jurdan
Couples with the immortals but the immortals are as silly as their age,
which is 18
#not saying I've never shipped like mountain age old and human age#im saying we need more funky silly teenager/new immortal and less olde immortals#i never thought id find any similarities between tmi and tfota except that Jace and Cardan are both wives simps#the mortal instruments#the folk of the air#sizzy#jurdan#actually the shadowhunter show has ruined it for me because show Izzy jsut looks OLDER and now i wish i can brainwash myself from rememberi#ng the show. i hate it sm lol. dominic as jace? hate it too lmao#isabelle lightwood#simon lewis#simon lovelace#jude duarte#cardan greenbriar
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I WIN (I had a dream about Deadpool & Wolverine)
#hands and knees on the ground#I win.....#if I had a nickel for every time I had a dream about one of my hyperfixations#I'd have six nickels#which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened six times!!#2 for genshin. 3 for marble hornets. and now 1 for deadpool & wolverine#anywho the dream was kinda similar to the scene where deadpool was trying to find the best wolverine varient#but like. it wasn't the wolverine that we know and love#basically deadpool got into trouble with some other folks in this bar in the forest#and this like. cowboy lumberjack wolverine was all like “get in” and drove off with deadpool in his truck before he got got#but the funniest part about it was wolverine saying “ no. I'm drunk wolverine!”#??? LIKE WHAT😭#because deadpool was asking him questions and thought he was another varient??#idk. it was kinda crazy. but on the bright side. i got a deadpool & wolverine dream!!#anywho someone make a fanfic rn#deadpool#deadpool marvel#deadpool movie#deadpool 3#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool & wolverine#wolverine & deadpool#wolverine#poolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett
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by the way i've been going through rtd's non-doctor-who work and the first thing i watched was queer as folk and i have to say. there's a lot going on in that show but my main takeaway is "it's extremely obvious that the guy writing this really wants to write doctor who." there are ten episodes and of those i believe seven mention doctor who in some capacity. the theme starts playing in the middle of gay sex. k-9 is there. the character responsible for most of these references breaks up with his boyfriend because the boyfriend can't name all the doctors. at the end he has a couple lines where i was like "wow this sounds like something the doctor would say" and then the next lines out of his mouth were about doctor who. all of this is retroactively much funnier now that rtd kickstarted a 20+-year-long reboot for the show
#doctor who#like the show itself is not all that similar to doctor who beyond like. rtd having a pretty clear voice as a writer#like the characters aren't similar the plots aren't similar it's a totally different genre#and like. ostensibly doctor who comes up so much because one particular character is a fan#but like. you can *tell* that it's coming from a place of appreciation and knowledge on the writer's part#i don't know. if i'd been an adult in 2004 and i'd seen queer as folk and then heard that that guy was going to be writing doctor who.#well i simply would not have been surprised.#i would've been like. yeah good for that guy. proud of him.#(i also found an interview with rtd from like. 2000. where he was like 'yeah i was going to do doctor who but then someone new came in so#that's probably not happening anymore :/' and again. very funny to read in retrospect)#anyway. the funniest reference was the theme playing mid-gay-sex because for half a second i thought i was watching the wrong show#and it had gone to the opening credits#also i need to find out if they used the original k-9 prop because i think that would be EXTREMELY funny
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I learned that you can make it to that kind of level and remain in tact as a human being. And I learned that Sheffield’s people are very similar to Irish people. We bumped into them at the same pub a fair few times. But I believe it goes beyond that.
— Grian Chatten from Fontaines D.C. on what they learned after touring with Arctic Monkeys [x]
#i really loved this whole interview but this part was really sweet#there was another point in the interview that is not directly related to am but reminded me of alex a lot#the interviewer was talking about listening to ‘romance’ and thinking about how the lyrics resonate with him as a listener#instead of thinking about what Grian might be meaning by the words#and Grian said he found that really refreshing cause he’s tired of being asked what his lyrics mean. that’s not the point really#and it made me think of alex so much when he’s asked about his lyrics and ofc interviewers and fans want to know#and we all want to gain insight into their writing process but he’s even said the lyrics are for people to form their own conclusions#he’s never going to spell it out completely for people and he shouldn’t have to#‘the car’ was a deeply personal album so it’s natural folks thought about what prompted alex to write those things#but the beauty in that album and all music is how the lyrics artists write about their own situations can relate to the listeners themselves#or perhaps be interpreted in a different way#idk I’m tired and rambling but i find the similarities between alex and grian in their mindset really interesting#shout out to tbhclove on ig for posting this interview#but ratiomonkeys on Twitter found it first!#fontaines d.c.#arctic monkeys
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Listen, I've been on a journey. I feel a bit like an unintentional fandom archaeologist now.
(special shoutout to @70thousandlightyearsfromhome for giving me a link to the Voyager scripts!)
#star trek#voy#c/p#SERIOUSLY THOUGH#I've read a TON of fic with different ships#to try and find some good ol' fashioned Tom Paris whump#and apparently Back In The Day#C/P was the big slash ship of Voyager#and I KEPT seeing Chakotay call Tom “poocuh”#and I thought maybe it was a fandom thing that just caught on#amongst different writers who would talk on blogs and stuff???#anyways it was to my surprise when I started reading the novelisation of “Caretaker”#only to see it in the novel#so of course I HAD to track down the original episode script#(many thanks to you lovely tumblr folks)#and lo and behold there it was#it's ironic though#considering I've seen multiple fics have “poocuh” described as being “beloved” or something similar#but in context when Chakotay says it#he is OBVIOUSLY spouting some kind of insult at Tom#oh the wild way the world of fandom works#funny that it didn't end up in the actual episode though
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It's me again!!! XD Can I ask about Ellieanora?? Who created her and what was her purpose??
Hi :)
Ellie was made so long ago in her story that I hadn't planned them out.
That said, I reckon she was made alongside the rest of the Forged (feels incorrect to call them Warforged in my setting, since they weren't made for war, rather they were made out of curiosity - folks wondering if they could make people in a less traditional way)
The Soul Forge, where Forged are born, has been autonomous for a while. The creators of it aren't around anymore, and it's mostly forgotten. Thanks to that, most of the Forged haven't been (for want of a better word) switched on, so there's just a huge number of them ready to go in their... Un-coffins? Weird people boxes :D
Sometimes, they'll just wake up, and try to find their way in the world.
Ellie in particular was an odd case, being set to reincarnate and perpetuate. I imagine her creator had a reason to keep her coming back like this, but that's something I'd have to figure out :D Or the DM for a game I play her in, I guess
I oughta figure out some more of the Forged lore for my setting
#ellieanora and over again#maybe their creator was their wife#trying to immortalise their beloved#or herself#trying to find an alternative to lichdom#the deep stone crypt in destiny is cool#but not more than an inspiration to this#like this isnt based on that#clovis bray is a bitch (derogatory)#good character but terrible guy#maybe her rival is the one who made her#setting up his downfall#to prevent his immortality#or to keep himself in check#so hed never get too powerful#theres a lot of options for her why#i know the fey arent involved#or any other outer planes folks#forged feel distinctly mortal in a way#like only people had hands in their creation#i say “people”#i mean like#mortal people#humans and elves and yadda yadda#the gods arent the only ones capable of creation#something i do like about destiny's exos#is that they can iterate themselves#its a bit similar to regeneration in dr who#if something goes wrong for exos they get reset#like they start as a flesh person
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Thing about small italian villages is that the didnt really have roads up until the 70's which of course leads to a massive amount of cousin marriage and inbreeding and while yes my particular own has its issues regarding that (3 major families (one of whom i am part of!!! Yay!!!) that all of the other families are related to, everyone there has bone/joint problems or some sort of schizofrenia) the neighboring one is worse as in they have one major family and the rest of the inhabitants are ppl who immigrated to have a quiet life in the mountain slopes and that by itself could be an extremely interesting study bcs everyone there kinda looks the same-ish and has a frankly insane amount of people with developmental disabilities for a population this small
#ok now that i have typed it out i realized it sounds mean and i want to earnestly say that i am not mocking them i just suck at tone#i do not think its something to be laughed at i just think the whole thing is uh. i wouldnt say tragic but really no one's fault#bcs again. if you live in the mountains where the main city is hard to reach bcs of poor road conditions#which leads to isolation and also extreme stigma against the village folk *of course* the village#will become more secluded and incestuous marriages will happen (aside from the obv economical factor#that a pre industrial reality would entrail)#its just. fascinating on a sociological and genetical level. esp since by when the roads were functional#and the village folk stigma had already gone away the whole 'we stay here we stay together we are better than anyone bcs they are envious#of us and we will continue inbreeding and any kids with severe disabilities born from it are actually Blessed because they are born from us#has already taken so much root it is now unlikely to be eradicated . the nature of italian villages is that every once in a while#someone reinvents blood purity and eugenetics lmao#anyways this whole incest thing is also the reason why i get frustrated about those books that have#the main characters go into small bigoted villages and either finding peace there or be horrified by its conservatives ideas#while never digging on the *why*. like yeah all this 'what happens in the village stays in the village and everyone else is an enemy'#but they never dig into why that mentality was born to begin with and how incest there#actively helps this mentality to continue on like you legit still have grandmas telling you to marry ur cousin#anw. i dont know what i was going for w this rant. it originated from knowing that my aunt turned local saint#was actually schizophrenic and was prone to paranoid attacks and mental breakdowns similar to mine#fun stuff!
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