#fanfic shitposting

[anns-works]

Leo: Bye! I'm going out to meet with Usagi!

Mikey, cheekily: He's going to see his boyfriend~

2k12 gang, thinking abt Usagi Miyamoto, who is old enough to be their grandpa:

[romances-not-tragedies]

Is Sadi Ratan truly intimidated by Jo Gar? Probably yes. Could also be why he hates the Island Detective...that much. Or does he?

Get to read this quote and the ensuing consequence(s) of the both of them being forced to be honest with one another in this Jo Gar fanfic.

[misty-doodles]

I am going to write another aib fic

It's gonna be Chishiya and Usagi fighting for Arisu's hand and then Arisu just goes

Arisu: y'all, I have two hands ??

I love open relationships

[nebulousfishgills]

I love saying I'm gonna start the next chapter of my latest fic and then proceeding to NOT do that.

Instead I spent two and a half hours collecting and editing footage into a forty second long shitpost video ABOUT my fic...

[bellaxgiornata]

I have absolutely no idea what y'all are talking about. I don't write anything but sheer tooth-rotting fluff. I most certainly don't torture the fictional men I love.

But let's definitely carpool to hell @pastafossa @shouldbestudying41 and @farfromstrange because I'd like to meet the Devil. I hear he's got a great ass 👌🏻

‘don’t you want your favourite character to be happy???’ no? i want my favourite character to be interesting. i want me to be happy. which sometimes involves my favourite character being in exquisite agony

[neo--queen--serenity]

the man with a plan

[live-from-flaturn]

"But you already wrote that trope."

[fishwithtitz]

Oops it me

[crispyliza]

I've got you all figured out fanartists

[nocheaseforyougoodsir]

"I cannot bear your burden but I will love you through it, if you allow me." Is this from Shakespeare or some other famous author NOPE ITS FROM A FUCKING MERTHUR FANFIC

[anns-works]

Kai, introducing everyone to his parents: These are my fiances; Cole, Zane and Jay. And these are Jay's husbands; Scott and Jaime. And this is Jaime's kinda cousin; PIXAL, who is also Zanes soulmate. And this is Lloyd.

Lloyd: Hello! It's nice to meet you :D

Nya, explaining: He'a adopted.

[romances-not-tragedies]

Lt. Sadi Ratan: And you will be brought to trial for lying to me, a police officer!

Atty. Edilberto Alcantara: (bursting into Jo Gar's office) "Lying to me"? Who the fuck do you think Jo Gar is, your wayward husband?

[bi-dykes]

Embrace the silliness. Embrace the meaningfulness.

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

“it must be heaven if a writer fell in love with you🥺” ma’am, the writer in question is an AO3 whump writer who puts their Blorbo through the worst imaginable kind of hell while making sure the sexual tension between them and their archenemy who’s putting them on a leash is off the charts before they both engage in a violent gay sex. are you sure you want writers to be in love with you?

[angelstrn]

dating matt is hard at times, especially for you who requires attention 24/7. attention he couldn't fully give you due to his spontaneous filming and work hours, but after a bit of pouting, doe eyes, and matt calling you dramatic, he agreed to let you tag along on a busy day.

you hadn't realized how tiring it was to be so busy, and after a few hours all the pouting was useless because you ended up fast asleep.

tucked into your boyfriends bed, the sound of the washing machine finishing wakes you up from your sleep. you lazily rub your eyes and walk into the kitchen, finding matt working.

standing there taking it all in, you notice how good he looks when he's focused — his tousled hair, his beard coming in, the glasses sitting on his nose where you should be sitting instead.

he feels your presence and perks his head up at you, giving you a soft smile. "hi, baby. you okay?", he places his glasses atop his head and opens his arms, reaching out to you.

maybe you were being dramatic, but you swear you would have done anything for him right then and there just at the sight of him. you smile at him with a lustful look in your eye and his entire demeanor shifts. as soon as you reach him you're practically jumping into his arms, legs on either side of his and lip immediately crashing into matts.

he pulls back for a second, catching his breath and mumbling, "what is it with you today, huh? so fuckin' needy—" you clearly didn't care, stopping him mid-sentence and pressing your mouth back onto his.

his hands slide up your torso and grip onto your waist, pulling you up to sit you onto the table and pushing away his laptop in the process.

you press yourself into him and matt groans into your mouth as his hands roam all over your body. you break away, matt letting out a whimper looking at you with a pout on his face.

your hands reach up to his glasses, repositioning them onto his face.

"better," you smile letting your fingers run through his hair.

"yeah?" he whispers softly, eyes locked on your lips.

"yeah."

your back is pressed against the table now, matt slowly rolling his hips into you, hair messy and glasses a little foggy. "need it, matt. need it so bad," you whine, pushing yourself up and down his length like your life depended on it.

"shit. oh my god." he groans, running a hand through his hair in disbelief at your impatience before increasing his speed and pounding into you.

his hand moves down to where you're connected, his thumb grazing your clit which earns a moan from you. matt kisses you deeply, slipping his tongue into your mouth making the kiss even sloppier.

you squeeze against him, leaving a creamy ring around his base. he groans again in response, thumbing at your nub faster as his hips snap into you.

"pleasepleaseplease, im almost there, matt!" you sob. matt smiles at your cry's, burying himself into the crook of your neck and nipping at the sensitive skin.

"you got it, sweetheart. cmon, give it to me." he coos, egging you on further.

you finally let loose, eyes squeezing shut and little ah ah ah's leaving your plush lips. matts right behind you, shooting up into you with a low groan as his hips stutter.

matt sighs, leaning down to give you a kiss before smiling, turning his head towards his bedroom.

"round two?"

"can you keep the glasses on?"

[zeldamacgregor]

I made this to call myself out but please feel free to hold up a mirror if you need one also.