#facing self
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Everyone has their own path to walk. Everyone faces themselves and their karma when they’re meant to.
It’s hard to not be able to help someone through theirs when you feel that you can. But sometimes you’re not what’s needed for the lessons that need to be learned in that moment.
#lesson learned#help vs harm#karma#reflection#lha#pushed away#darkness#facing self#1introvertedsage#intsa original#reality#learning#see#quotes#writing
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pink carnations for the floral portrait series + detail (pls do not tag as "me", thank you!!)
#it's been a loonnggggg time since I added a piece to the self portrait series. this piece has actually sat on p*treon for a few months#i decided to crop the face like i used to for regular posting though because that just seems. correct?#like for framing I mean.#sergle art#artists on tumblr#illustration#carnations#pink carnations#plants#body positive#self portrait#flower portraits#bare skin --
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truth serum / system reveal au where shen qingqiu gets hit with an uncloaking spell that reveals the system in the reflection of his eyes every time it pops up.
during one of his missions, in the treasure hoard of some dragon-like creature, he finds a golden, oval shaped hand mirror, its gaudy style more victorian based than anything (airplane you hack!), that doesn't seem to do anything when he looks into it. but when he does, it reveals the system's screen in his eyes.
he doesn't notice this, of course, because he can't see it, and the system, surprisingly, stays quiet.
the peak lords think he's cursed.
maybe mu qingfang is the first to notice, during the mandatory post mission check-up, when shen qingqiu is scrolling through his most recently accumulated points and mu qingfang can see the strange vividly-blue lines reflected in his pupils. it's gone when shen qingqiu blinks, like it was nothing but a trick of the light.
it comes out when yue qingyuan is visiting and, just as he's done laying out the plans for a new mission, shen qingqiu's eyes glaze over and a bright blue box takes over the whole of his iris. shen qingqiu goes quiet; the thing in his eyes moves, shifts, pulses for a second, like static worms crawling all over his pupils. then he blinks, and it's gone, and shen qingqiu accepts the mission that yue qingyuan was almost sure he would decline.
maybe there is an intervention, when the peak lords corner shen qingqiu at qian cao peak and try to figure out what's wrong, subjecting him to all kinds of treatments and curse-finding spells that turn up empty, they can't find anything.
of course, the silencing threat is still very much up and running. at first shen qingqiu was kind of confused by the whole ordeal, but when the peak lords start describing a "strange blue box", he realizes, with sickening suddenty, that they're describing the system. and he can't say anything.
this only makes everything worse, because their fellow peak lord now keeps evading every question and acts like he doesn't understand. liu qingge points right at his face and asks, "that blue box, what is it?" and shen qingqiu laughs nervously and starts talking about how bright the weather is and surely it's the sky and nothing to worry about!
even worse, during the intervention the system thought it was a good idea to start talking to him, so now even the peak lords who hadn't seen it and who might have been persuaded by light tricks and reflections, get a first row view that no, that definitely isn't a trick of the light.
they try to do the whole thing of "are you in danger, blink twice" but shen qingqiu can't even do that because it's still a direct admittance!
maybe eventually he starts saying vague confirmations that don't actually confirm anything, like "this master hears what you're saying", or maybe he goes with a classic "this master can neither confirm nor deny that." but the system starts warning him for that too and eventually he stops saying anything, which worries the others more.
luckily mu qingfang catches on that every time they ask a direct question about the box or shen qingqiu says anything vaguely confirming, it appears. it doesn't appear when they ask about curses or demons, so it must not see that as a threat.
for a little extra angst: maybe the peak lords keep pressuring him for answers, and at some point shen qingqiu gets fed up and snaps out something like, "why don't you understand that i'm not allowed to answer that!" the system counts this as a direct admittance, threatening it's existence. so it punishes. shen qingqiu has a qi deviation so bad it lasts two weeks and takes two people every day to cleanse his meridians. the system doesn't appear in that time. it doesn't appear for a long while after that, either. the peak lords stop asking, mainly because shen qingqiu will instantly leave the room if they do. they don't stop searching for a cure, though.
shang qinghua returns from a business trip and catches on the second someone mentions a blue box and forced silencing.
#i like the idea of sqq sort of disassociating every time he talks with the system#like his eyes go unfocused and he goes quiet and doesnt seem to hear what others are saying#and the others always thought that was odd but hey. whatever. until some strange *thing* started showing up#i do also like the idea of the system slowly allowing sqq more liberties#bc its decided it likes this storyline#liu qingge comes to cleanse sqqs meridians and gets red with anger when the system pops up in sqqs eyes#but then sqq reaches out to him and says ''no. it... likes you.''#the system doesnt (cant) really like anyone. but its gifting him friendship points when liu qingge visits him and that's positive?#liu qingge doesnt see it as positive and gets even more mad because what do you MEAN this monster enitity ''likes him''????#liu qingge is going to kill it the first chance he has!!#yue qingyuan talks about a mission looking for volunteers and you can *see* his face fall when the blue box appears#''it wants you to go. doesn't it?'' ''this shidi would like to join this mission.'' ''i understand.''#sometimes the blue box appears and sqq looks *stricken*. like he just saw something really awful#but he just cant talk about it#svsss#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain#shen qingqiu#yue qingyuan#mu qingfang#system svsss#svsss au#reveal au
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#Poison#new poem#poetry#darkness#lost#clarity#balance#lesson#lha#poem#i.s.a.#new poetry#intsa original#facing self#reflection#poetic#heart#play#1introvertedsage#writers on tumblr#original poetry#poems daily
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let's eat! 🍜🥬🍄
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Ok hear me out: Narilamb but they're both aroace and in a qpr.
I've been rolling around in my head for like a long long time this idea that Narinder and Lambert could both be aroace and (after like. A couple of centuries or so) end up in this like very comfortable very close relationship that neither of them define as anything specific other than calling it a "companionship". But on the other hand most of the cult thinks that they're dating in secret or something despite the fact that both of them have said they don't take lovers, because they are clearly very tight but maybe not super openly so, so maybe the cultists thing they're being secretive and hiding something or something like that. Idk but my aroace brain loves thinking about extremely close (mostly) platonic relationships and for some reason my brain decided hmm. I'm going to take this and throw it at Narilamb and see how I like it.
So then I decided to make a ridiculous joke comic about Narinder asking Lambert's hand in marriage specifically because he wants to get out of paying taxes. Because like, I know that spouse followers do actually still have to pay taxes in the actual game but. Hey Narinder and Lambert have presumably never married so they probably don't know that...? Honestly the only reason I made this was because the concept tickled me and I spent too much time on this for no one to see it, so. This comic and all it's absolute ridiculousness be upon ye.
While there's a tiny part of me that's been thinking about making this into an AU (which I'd probably call something like the "Strictly Platonic AU" or something), I know for a fact that I would blatantly not do anything legitimate with it so. It's an unofficial AU I guess?? But. Anyways. I thought this would be funny. Enjoy my ramblings and I hope you enjoy this thing that I spent. Actual time on. Lol
#cotl#cotl fanart#cult of the lamb#cult of the lamb fanart#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#cotl narilamb#narilamb#(not sure if this counts as full on narilamb but hey for the folks who don't wanna see it it's properly tagged)#tbh there's a part of me that doesn't know why I'm posting this cuz. it's so ridiculous and silly and self indulgent and like#it probably only appeals to me specifically but hey. I thought it was funny and maybe someone else will too#also new lambert face!! which i'm super happy with they look really good i think in comparison to my other drawings of them so far#anyways that's enough tag rambles. if you've read this far into the tags then uh. hello!! I hope you recieved good news today :D
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my favourite anti-aging methods are inner peace, forgiveness and minding my business
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No one can break your delusion for you. You have to do it yourself.
#444#message#delusioned#reality#waking up#seeing#facing self#facing reality#what is reality#learning#being#LHA#1introvertedsage#delusion#life#why are you here#wake up#disillusioned
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*holds face tenderly*
#my art#toh#the owl house#toh hunter#toh willow#toh gus#toh huntlow#huntlow#toh winter#ive been so good about commissions that i drew something so self indulgent#as a treat to myself#dont worry shes ok#just got elbowed to the face and her glasses broke#just wanted to draw hunter worried#love me a boy that cares SO MUCH#might do a part 2
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HOW I MANIFESTED MY DREAM REALITY IN A DAY
WHAT I MANIFESTED:
- name change
- trilingualism
- 5”10 height
- thin and slender body
- a RAGING golden tan
- face like adriana lima’s
- top grades + intelligence
- dp has a FAT crush on me
HOW I DID IT:
- robotic affirmations in my head (for example repeating ‘I have everything I desire’ over and over in my head whenever I’m free throughout the day)
- visualizing
- law of assumption
- the belief that I am God and I am the creator of my own reality
- PERSIST, PERSIST, AND PERSIST SOME MORE I SWEAR TO GOD THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
- being crazy delulu
I never actually used the void state for this, because I found that putting the void state on a pedestal was limiting my beliefs. Please refrain from thinking too much about the void or from putting it on a pedestal because this can really hinder your progress. Remember, you are the void. The void is inside you. You don’t need to ‘enter’ it because it is already there!
That’s it, just remember to have a positive mindset and be literally as delusional as you possibly can be. Worked for me!! This took about a whole day to work, and the next day I woke up and it was all manifested (sounds crazy but it’s true and I literally started jumping and squealing like a five year old when I realised it worked). Most importantly, remember that manifesting is supposed to be fun, so go have fun and enjoy yourself!! :)
#subliminal results#success story#desired face#law of attraction#creator of my reality#master manifestor#self concept affirmations#powerful affirmations#law of assumption#self concept#void state
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It's been a while~🌻
#self-indulgent scribble because I earned it!!! >:D#Ah.... The eternal dca artist struggle: how tf do I draw this oreo-faced robot man in side profile view (affectionate)#fnaf security breach#fnaf sb#dca fandom#fnaf sun#sunnydrop x reader#y/n#my art
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Birds of a Feather previous / next
#my art#feralnette au#birds of a feather#long tags#sorry I went apeshit in the tags#LETS SAY IT ALL TOGETHER NOW#I - M - A - G - OOOOOOOOO#its fun drawing marinette's back to Alya and having her appear stout and unstoppable and totally logical#and then you see her face and she's like two seconds from completely snapping and is keeping it together by a thread#as a note just because mari feels very certainly abt smth doesnt mean she's right. feelings can be valid and also irrational#in the throes of grief she decided it was better to be alone than to lose someone again so she started pulling away#and lila made pulling away very very very easy to do#shes also vaguely aware she's being unfair in pinning this on alya which is why she started spinning the drain on cockmoth again#legitimately all the shit that's happened to her wouldn't have been so catastrophic if he was never in the picture and she knows it#but the bitterness of her bestie choosing a fantastic liar over her at the worst of times stiiiiiings#alya's personal timing was bad but lila really took advantage of the fact that marinette had been acting off and weird#she basically clocked marinette as being unstable from SOMETHING and made up a lie about her#knowing she wouldn't have the strength to defend herself#between her social life going tachy bc of lila and losing fu in a way that felt like personhood death marinette was really put on the spot#and alya doing her thing of busting in there and assuming her bias is correct was a terrible combo#essentially marinette is highly unstable and alya is just realizing that#busting in and giving her a lecture when she's slightly hysterical and definitely delirious from exhaustion is NOT the way#to show her she's self sabotaging#cuz thats just gonna make her double down on self sabotaging. bc marinette will not accept that she is also a CHIIIIILD
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チーンホワ君の日常。
sqh’s everyday life.
#svsss#moshang#mobei jun#shang qinghua#sha hualing#scum villian self saving system#mine#i feel like they probably do things differently in the demon realm like write in blood or some sh*t lmao#rip huahua the underpaid intern but at least he gets bobby face smashes
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Non transmitigation au where Shen Yuan auditions for a part in PIDW on a lark when it gets a live action adaptation, not thinking he’ll actually get a part (he just wanted to be able to say he did it okay? He was dated okay??! He was not dared he just thought it’d be neat, but he’ll admit to nothing.) and, much to his horror, ends up cast as Shen Qingqiu.
He somehow accidentally makes Shen Qingqiu so likable that he’s the most popular character. The fandom goes feral over him. He becomes famous. New fans are joining the bandwagon in droves to watch him.
And all the while, Shen Yuan is frantically trying to pretend he isn’t the most notorious anti fan troll to clown on the internet. He has never heard of PIDW before what do you mean Peerless Cucumber whomst?
#I just think it’d be really really funny to watch Shen Yuan flounder trying to act like he doesn’t know anything about pidw at all#he has a thin face okay#somehow airplane finds out and is lording it over his head#we’ll reconvene on the topic another time tho it just needs to be out of my drafts at this point or it’ll grow mold and mushrooms#mxtx fandom#svsss au#svsss#mxtx svsss#svsss fanfiction#svsss fic#svsss shen yuan#sqq svsss#svsss shen qingqiu#svsss shitpost#scumbag system#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#pidw#proud immortal demon way#mxtx hell#original shen qingqiu#shen jiu#peerless cucumber
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Thought Fiddlestan was a purely comedic ship for a while but now I get it, I see the light. It’s about a man who nurtures and cares for others to the point of heartbreak meeting a man who doesn’t remember what it’s like for anyone to care about him. It’s about them being warm together around the absence of someone they both love. It’s about Fiddleford’s innate domesticity comforting a man whose deepest desire was to come home. It’s about falling in love with the same face again but in a new context that heals your past trauma. It’s about Stan’s unbridled affection finally validating someone who desperately needed the recognition. It’s also about very funny old man yaoi.
#it also completely works in canon if it ends poorly and they both get their memories wiped which is maybe the funniest part#stan my man you do not remember being El Gee Bee Tee but you know who else doesn’t remember? The junkyard hillbilly.#plus the yearning on both ends and the way it also makes sense for Fids to help Stan get the gears rolling on portal fixing#at its best it ends in a future where neither of them are as self destructive as in canon#and at its worst everything proceeds like normal#Fids starts a cult cause he got traumatized by the same damn face TWICE I would go insane too tbh#gravity falls#fiddlestan#fiddleford mcgucket#stanley pines
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