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strugglingatart · 8 months

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Jr year ep 2

This is me live blogging bc I need to get thoughts out also would love fandom friends full spoilers bellow the cut just so no one accidentally reads anything they don't want to this will be long

No shenanigans at the begining way lowkey sad I love our intrepid heroes being dumb

Siobhan and Zac kick it off with SUCH good turns straight away we love (also emily's cutting words? delicious)

Them all discussing more stuff mid battle is so nice I love but also not Ally forgetting they could try to heal lol

"playing with you all at level 10 has never convinced me more that this game is unplayable at level 20. fucking unplayable" Brennan the man who I 100% have seen play att level 20. But we HAVE to stan the complaing I love them so much Murph especially I always laugh so much

Siobhan please we cannot be confident before rolls they go bad then

we were doing so well like seconds ago and now everything feels terrible

ARMOR OF AYDA omg my loves

Kristen and Riz are me when my friends are being to sexual but also Kristen please remember you and tracker?

NOT FABIAN FALLING AGAIN, and his idea was real good as well, but Ally yeeting the dice also a big mood

Lou's sass was so good I love im so much

only one person saving out of everyone is brutal why do dice currenntly hate them

Murph loosing it at Ally's saving throws being empty is so funny, and poor them gatting so defensive (also have they been doing it wrong this whole time then? has it never been written down? was is just a mistake on their season prep?)

Zac and Lou killed that look at me bit I'm sorry they are geniuses

I truly thought Brennan was gonna make this fight SO much easier and in many ways I get why he didn't but I'm not over it

Listen Murph is looking SO GOOD this season it legit distracted me for a few seconds I had to go back to understand what Brenan said about the van flipping I am a disaster queer through and through

this is so intense all of a sudden omgggg

Poor hangvan ily and know Gorgug will fix you tho

Oh no Kristen, but also the die deadass turned on them, sad vibes (also I miss good rolling Murph I know we had him for one ep but I loved him)

once again yeeting the dice is a mood and then the whole if i hit anyone bit, art tbh

AHHHHH that nat 1 followed by a nat 20 was magical, also Em is wearing the naddpod live shirt 😍 I was 110% with her tho I wanted Gorgug to get it so bad so that deception roll was EVERYTHING TO ME, Ayda claming Gorgug as the greatest wizard is legit one of my favorite things whenever they bring it up and support that theory my heart is so happy

Brenan just being like yes these npcs i made up for the media res are just for that they will die even if they don't

Zac has what healing thing? again not knowing enough about DnD makes me bad at knowing who can do what

shoutout to the two crew

listen this theme of exaustion specifically with school will end me like i cannot it hits too close

Moggy the doggy! we stan Adaine the little guys guy(gal?)

Did Cassandra text you? Nonstop

this flourish lacks flourish (me giving the finishing touches to art projects for university)

LISTEN Fig asking about first day of school outfit was literally Emily choosing violence omg I felt that deeply

I still have jump and i haven't used it so I'm just gonna... I love Zac

They all LOOSE IT at two more guys and I know it was mostly the players but honestly having an absolute laughing fit out of exaustion is another big mood and I felt both seen and called out (I have STROIES about this) and like it just fit the theme so well

there's two nat 1's, Lou's full discociated, Murph's loosing it, it's pure chaos for a bit but whoever did the closed captions? A+++ job

Kristen taking ths ice cream sandwich out and going to the hangman is gold (also I remember the pouch of ice cream sandwiches existing like I fully remeber Kristen usinf it before but i don't remeber when/where she gets it despite having just rewatched both freshman and sophomore years and it's bothering me)

I want the so tactical so late t-shirt

Fabian passed so I legit thought that was gonna work but you know what? it's funnier that it didn't

"I was a turncoat the whole time" is so funny for no reason, also Fabian babe, ily but like why do you wanna kiss a mirror it will not be enjoyable (also at this point Lou is either feeding into all the comp-het queer theories or is like the queer whisperer)

The father the son and the balthazar made me cackle

I have said this before in a post somewhere but while I get where Kristen is coming from so much like truly I'm right there with her but also I kinda hate how she's avoiding Cassandra but also I get it baby but also pls do better (or at least change tactics in odrer to to it lowkey unhealthily)

Fabian I promise you you can do better LMAO Riz, you are correct

Again to me Fig's hypothetical is like fighting words I'd be pissed and depressed

But also high school me would have loved a dance camp tbh (also to be able to dance in general rip my dancing dreams, taken away by a chronic issue and over protective parents)

"I think I do a really half hearted prayer of healling just because I don't.. trust you" I love Ally so much

ah yes the silliness is back but they are so tired

wanna stay at our place? we have so many beds

The entire ecaf bit was so good i cannot deal

Hallariel is saying Fabian's name more like the elves or am I tripping?

Gillear is slightly less pathetic! he won a cruise! oh and they are engaged, full step sibblings Fig and Fabian

also poor Fabian like he needs his parental figures here... Cathilda better stay or I'm personally gonna have words with Brennan, stop making them suffer they fuck up things alone

ALSOOO there is no way Gillear would not want to talk to Fig omg I'm fighting brennan again

Gillear luck... did Fig uncurse him by taking that deal and is she about to get his bad luck?

SKLONDA we stan

Brennan I swear to god this tiny goblin has saved the world three times what do you mean he cannot go to college I will fight you, this scene hit me so hard omg we were promised silliness not heart wrenching reality in my fantasy

I think Zac legitimately forgot the mirror didn't run away for like a second which makes it funnier but Fig IS just that good. 32 decepetion fool the character and the player

BRENAN what do you mean Zelda gave back his stuff this is DURING the seven where they are still TOGETHER I swear I will riot

Frosty fair mentioned twice it's connected to or the big thing this season

The Thistlespring are SO PRECIOUS

Jawbone and Sandra Lynn made a cake I can't deal, and it's belated birthdays omg the way I would cry

THE RAGH AND LYDIA ART IS SO GOOD

the justaposition of Emily's cackle and Ally's face to the dangers Fig and Kristen are dangerously and/or wildly close to being expell is so good

Lou choking on water at "we're allowed to fail a certain number of classes each semester" also real good treiler editing bc I thought that was 10000% connected to the you let your god die line that comes right before it on there

Fig's been multiclass since start of sophmore year, does she do warlock classes sometimes I wonder

I like that Jawbone is not judging here he's just like facts: you are failing and this is why, now we can see what we do about it

ouch that whole im swimming my head is liquid kristen thing felt dangerously close to me... I usually relate to gorgug and riz like i adore kristen but she's never me what is happening (this is not bad just me having like my 10th identity mini crisis this year)

THE AYDA ART she looks so bummed but so pretty.. but also Brenan I feel like I said I'll fight you a couple of times here but if we get no ayda I will fly to LA and fight you

I reached text limit will do a part two

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #fhjr #riz gukgak #fabian aramais seacaster #kristen applebees #adaine o'shaughnessey #gorgug thistlespring #fig faeth

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bigusbossus · 1 day

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Need to see ("straight" homophobic) Huey bent over arms tied up with a fuck machine just absolutely destroying him. Fucking crying and screaming like he's going to die, blood everywhere because he's never even put a finger up his ass. Bb or ocelot or someone is just sitting there enjoying watching him suffer. Nothing Huey can do but wriggle around a little bit in desperation and since he can't really move most of himself at all he's mostly stuck just taking it as he mentally falls apart. Bonus points if he's so disgusted with himself/so overwhelmed by being fucked for the first time that he throws up and nobody bothers to clean it up.

noooo dont have the homophobic bitch get fucked in the ass for hours on end what if he realizes he enjoys it and gets so disgusted with himself he throws up and everyone around him laughs and makes fun of him for being so pathetic but it gets him all hard and leaking, maybe even cumming :(((( (yes please put the homophobic cunt in situations) then he gets his puke shoveled back into his mouth or even better used as lube to fuck himself with

everytime he wriggles it just angles the machine differently, he probably accidentally angles it to fuck into his prostate everytime, milking him dry and absolutely destroying his brain. he begs and cries for help but the people in the room with him are just getting off to his display or loserness. imagine too the dildo on the mchine gets changed out every hour, bigger and bigger everytime until hueys absoloutely stretched to the max, his puffy hole bleeding around what ever goliath they decide to shove up there. its not like hes got a choice, he just has to take it through tears.

the entire time hes going through the eight stages of grief too, going "hah... theres no way im enjoying getting my hole fucked... OH MY GOD IM ENJOYING GETTING MY HOLE FUCKED?!?!??! theres nno way its just.. hah..i mean its totally normal for a guy to enjoy prostate stimulation... right? i mean thats totally a thing even alpha men do haha,, its so normal maybe i do like this..." maybe just keep him there for days until he learns his place in the world and gets addicted to cumming with just his ass. take him out of then and deprive him of it jsut to really torture him, leave him clenching his loose ass around nothing trying to find anything around base to substitute the feeling :3

#asks #huey

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oroborosdreadwalker · 2 years

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Been seeing everyone making posts about quest progression in fromsoft games and about how you should have A quest log, if your that stuck just google it, i wont judge you. Let me tell you a story.

When I first played DS1 i finished the tutorial version of the undead asylum and beat the asylum demon with the nroken straight sword because thats what I thought you had to do, not avoid it and run to the doors at the top left. Got an item i could not use and didnt know how to get the stats to use it, if the boss didnt level me up what does. I find my actual weapon an Axe and the spider shield forgot its actual name(yes my first ever character was a pyromancer with the defult look) wondered why i couldmt of used that on the boss, got my sunny D and unlocked the shortcut back to the bonfire learning "oh this game has shortcuts" got my glove and beat all the enemys in the area, saw there was a door I couldn't get through and died because i forgot about one enemy and didnt heal because i didnt know what button to press. Respawned at the bonfire with no souls, questioned shit for a minute then went back to where i died and saw my souls where there, i have now learnt the punishment for dieing, and that i have one chance to grab them again, because i put 2 and 2 together with the souls i got on my way that id drop them and my other pile would despawn. Finally i get to that grand opening and realise "ooohhhh this was how i was suppost to fight it" so like a dumbfuck I RESTARTED MY FUCKING GAME TO DO IT THAT WAY" learnt about plunging attacks, and had an easier time beating him, but I didnt get the item he dropped before. SO I DELETED MY SAVE AGAIN AND DID IT THE WAY I DID BEFORE AGAIN WHY WAS 16 YEAR OLD ME SO FUCKING CONFUSING! Met the bird and got sent to firelink and finally learnt how to use my souls as they are used to level up, used what i had to boost my strength and vitality, wondered what to do so i talked to the first NPC i saw the crestfallen warrior, and got told theres two bells, ring'em thats its. Wasnt told where just one above one below. Thats was the starr of my DS adventures and taught myself "oh this game doesnt really care about you, you actually have to use your brain and remember this shit. Fuck. And that stayed with me through all the games DS2? Yup kept that in mind once i saw i wasnt going to be told absolutly anything at all until i saw my first lord soul acquired when beating the sinner. Ans realised oh i need more of these 3 kinda held your hand more i find but still got lost at some places and accidently summoned the dancer early because i accidently killed emma becuae i put my controller down for her diolouge and my right bumper got pressed enough to let lopse a heavy attack. Learnt of the consequences of killing friendly NPCs also during this i failed most NPC questlines in all the games, i failed to save solaire so he turned hostile when he found his sun, that one hurt the most, dont remember which on hurt the most in DS2, in 3 i failed greirats questline and got him killed loosing a merchant, and i failed Eileen's questline in bloodborne. Still havent played demon souls yet but want to. And in elden ring i failed Bocs questline, so yes you will fail, but you have to think, the games wont hold your hand want a quest log? Go fucking make one yourself a physical one you can put your finding in so if yoh get stuck or see something you can flip through it to see if its important. I do, ifni can find the ones i made for DS1 ill post a picture of it but im pretty sure I lost that when my second apartment burnt down.

#gaming #fromsoft games #fromsoftware #elden ring #dark souls 2 #dark souls #dark souls 3 #bloodborne #its ok to fail you learn from those mistakes #also fuck you git gud scrub fucking questlogs in a fromsoft game you should become a comedian

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obscure-imagines · 4 years

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*Horror genre/smut warning*

-He’d be very tentative to catch feelings for anyone because he’s a very depressed boi

-quiet guy is hard to get to know, especially after an apocalyptic event

-Even if you’re survivors together, he’s just kind of going to be floating around quietly, so if you want to get to know Hyunsu, you’re going to have to make an effort

-Hyunsu is drawn to beautiful things, things that inspire hope (music, kids, etc...) and he can enjoy pleasurable things for a time, but Hyunsu is always terrified that good things will be torn from his grasp, so he never wants to let himself love something too easily

-Boy has his found family, so being accepted by his loved ones would be really important.

-It would be the elder survivors like Han and Gilseob who notice the connection between you and Hyunsu first

-i’m talking hard core pining, long looks, Hyunsu’s eyes finding you any time you enter a room, but you’re both oblivious to each other

-It’s a tough situation because Hyunsu is still treated like a monster at times, and people are obviously scared of his dark side

-Hyunsu can’t even imagine getting close to you, for fear that he’ll hurt you

-his monster alter ego even toys with him by mentioning you sometimes, further increasing the poor boys anxiety

-He’d get growingly agitated any time you have to put yourself in danger, and always ends up going places with you just to make sure you’re protected

-it starts with him just kind of shadowing you when you head up to your apartment for something one day

-the building is pretty much safe, but when you catch Hyunsu out of the corner of your eye, you almost have a heart attack, which he apologizes profusely for

-he goes with you to your room and is kind of awkward at your door because you’re a pretty girl and he’s about to go into your apartment, even if it is a post apocalyptic world, boy has manners

-He’s also just very big and tall, so even though he kind of hunches over, he sticks out like a sore thumb in your apartment

-he’s so quiet, but once you find something you both mutually enjoy to talk about, he begins to loosen up

-he continues shadowing you, he’s pretty much your designated monster survival partner

-at dinners you start to eat together and everyone is low key hoping you both work out, but are also worried about what it could mean for you if Hyunsu turns full monster out of the blue one day

-He’s very hesitant to allow you to touch him, so you’d have to start small

-like maybe you offer to help him clean up some residual blood left on his skin after he’s healed from a fight

-Hyunsu all but holds his breath while you wipe his skin

-big uwu boy, heart eyes to the extreme

-he honestly just needs a good cuddle and one day, after a particularly rough event where you almost die, Hyunsu is too tired to be in full control of himself, so when you crawl into bed with him, wrapping your arms around his frame, Hyunsu allows himself to enjoy it

-the biggest soft boy is the small spoon sometimes cuz he really needs it

-he falls asleep in your arms and it’s the most peaceful sleep he’s had in maybe years

-when he wakes up, he rolls to cuddle against your chest, still half asleep and unaware of what he’s doing until he can hear the beat of your heart under his ear and realizes you’re not just a pleasantly warm pillow

-boy practically jumps out of the bed and needs to be pulled back into your embrace

-if you start massaging his scalp and holding him to your chest- he’s going to die, like, he’ll never be happier

-He craves your cuddles like nothing else in the whole world, and allows himself more and more to be happy when he’s with you, and to be with you often

-seeing him smile is so odd, people are shook

-the first day you grab his hand in front of people makes his heart melt

-the two of you are simply waiting for dinner, and you grab his hand, playing with his fingers casually

-you don’t even notice how impactful the gesture is

-after dinner, Hyunsu finds himself swept away by the key men of the group, Han thinks it’s all very cute, Gilseob agrees with Han but he’s worried like Eunhyeok that Hyunsu could be a danger to you. Sangwook is just there because they dragged him along

-Hyunsu is still worried he could hurt you and you notice him pulling away after his discussion with the guys, which leads to him fully communicating to you all his fears about being a monster and not being good enough for you

-squash all his anxieties with a kiss

-Hyunsu will melt against you, your lips are the best cure for his busy mind

-if you tug a little at his hair boy will be whipped forever

-once he opens up to you, he’ll tell you everything

-time spent cuddling and just talking

-tracing his scars and kissing them, telling him you’ll never leave him

-him being worried about becoming a monster but you’re so determined he won’t- and you won’t let him try to avoid you for your ‘own safety’ so he’s pretty much just stuck with loving you and accepting that you make him happy and he’s allowed to be happy

-helping him cut his hair and being shook by how much younger he looks

- “do you like it?” he wants to make sure you still like his new hair

-he’s so much more boyish- it honestly makes it worse when his hair is short because people have been straight up offering him up to really hard jobs because he ‘cant die’

-like, you’re going to be fiercely protective of this boy, just as he is of you

-yeah he’s the one that ‘cant die’ but if someone tries to be even slightly mean to him, you’re jumping in and throwing fists

-’oh? you guys think it’s a good idea to sacrifice him to the military/government for our survival? time to meet my fists’ you’ll jump in swinging i swear to god

-you would probably be down to fight Eunhyuck on the daily for how he treats Hyunsu like his watch dog/hound

-low key everyone is prepared to wake up and find you and Hyunsu just gone one day

-he looks at you with the biggest heart eyes, like, boy is so in love with you and anyone can see it

-he’s going to cherish any time with you

-nights are for cuddles and memorizing your face in the moonlight that comes through the windows

-will find you cute little gifts, like, if he knows you like certain books or stuff like that he’ll keep an eye out for things to amuse you when he’s looking for supplies

-being way too fucking cute. like. this is an apocalypse and this man is just out here being a full fucking simp for you im-

-be careful as he gets more in love with you though because if someone threatens you, his monster side will pop out

-you’re feeling fragile one day and someone says something rude about Hyunsu and ‘how much time he has left’ and when Hyunsu finds you crying, his eyes go black and his monster side demands you tell him who he has to go kill for you

-after that, you can be certain his monster side won’t ever hurt you, which makes Hyunsu feel a lot more relaxed

-boy finally lets you touch him for longer than like five minutes because he’s not scared of loosing himself when he’s with you anymore

-ok, let’s be real, ya’ll would find ways to fuck even during the apocalypse

-boy deserves it. he DESERVES IT I TELL YOU

-soft honey boy, starts so soft, so much kissing and foreplay

-you’d really have to initiate things going farther than just kissing, and he’d worship you if you undressed for him

-10/10 will tell you he loves you while buried completely inside of you

-lots of gripping and passion, breathless kisses, hand holding and finger squeezing

-let him burry his face in your neck

-the sweetest aftercare filled with cuddles, hugs, kisses, and sweet words of affirmation

-he’s super shy about petnames, but you pet your ass that this big soft boi is going to let ‘jagiya’ (honey/sweetheart) slip every once and again.

-super shy about pda around other people, but you purposefully like to show how much you love him to make everyone else think twice about being mean to him or prejudice because he’s ‘infected’, whatever that even means.

-stealing his massive clothes

-taking care of him in ways that count, like making sure his depression doesn’t get the better of him being able to complete basic tasks, like cleaning him after a fight and making sure he eats properly

-being Hyunsu’s proof that humans can live with monsters, because you’ll never let him go and you love him

-i mean, not even going to lie, 10/10 Hyunsu would make living in monster world worth it

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dreambones · 2 years

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Reactions that give me life. If I suffer, you all suffer with me :)

But yes, this is canon in the AU, I was gonna reply in a reblog of the drable but it start getting too long agsgdh.

That is the first big fight Starling and Foxy have, they are both hard headed, Star used to have her emotions ignored and trivialized by those around her, while Foxy is not used to open up about his feelings to no one (sometimes not even himself) because then he will have to face the pain of loosing them.

I still haven’t decided what is that “big danger that is coming” maybe another pirate ship much more dangerous (Im still debating on giving W. Afton aka Springtrap his own big ass fleet or something). Whatever it is, Foxy fears Starling is not ready for it, and he is right, Star at this point have been for a couple battles against other pirate ships that have no moral compass and are only out for the coin, but she mostly sneaks around, laying traps, or being the bait.

But Foxy handles the situation the only way he knows, and that is by shoving Star away, in a way deciding the pirate life is far too dangerous for her and she is better of looking for another path (she isn’t and that brings a whole new argument because Star is sick and tired of those around her trying to decide what is best for her).

Star does leaves the ship and finds an inn to stay in the town they were currently dock at. Long story short she hears info that points Foxy and the Golden Fang crew are headed straight into a trap, and goes back because even if things ended bad, the idea of the crew that took her away from the castle and shared with her the past year(s) is too painful, even if it didn’t meant the same for them as it did for her, she can’t let them die.

Of course there’s a big battle, lots of chaos, Foxy and the crew getting dangerously close to loosing, Star managing to clumsily aid them and all together manage to fight back and flee away. In the end both Foxy and Star were right, Star did end up being useful and helping out, and she does gets injured (they all get injured but she is the only fleshy one).

After everyone is patched up and danger has passed, probably docking in a safe place for a while, Star is taken back as part of the ship crew, but not before a long, very needed, conversation with Foxy. It is not all fixed, they both hurt each other and it will be a while to patch things up and rebuilt their trust, but they do start getting along in a more horizontal way so to speak, since until now Star couldn’t help but still see Foxy as a figure of authority that couldn’t be questioned, while as mentioned before, Foxy still saw Star a bit as someone that he was fond of, but would eventually realize she had it better in her previous life and would leave them all and go back to it.

Maybe I’ll end up writing some of that, my head is so full of this au today.

#Fnaf #fnaf pirate au #fnaf princess and pirate au #fnaf foxy #fnaf starling #dream writing #cttrajan1206 #me getting an excuse to ramble more about my self indulgent au

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nonstoplover · 3 years

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protagonist ~ joe liebgott (band of brothers)

my masterlist | my hbo war masterlist

pairing: joe liebgott x female reader

short summary: joe's assigned to search for the perfect house for easy's hq in the new town they'll soon arrive to on their way through germany and finds one with a girl in there who's like the protagonist of one of the comics he's read - courageous, fearless, heroic.

words: 2.5K

a/n: first of all, sorry for disappearing, exam season has started at my uni and i've been hella busy these past weeks (and gonna be for the following few as well, u g h ).

anyway this fic came around from a conversation i had with the lovely @now-im-a-belieber when i was telling her about an idea i had and she technically came up with the base of this. thank you, Pearl, i love you xx (i hope i did justice to your idea)

oh and let's just say i have no clue if this would have been possible, at least the exact way i wrote it.

taglist: @how-are-those-nuts-sarge @50svibes @pennyllanne @nowinnablewar

gif credit: @basilone

Four loud bangs sound against her front door right as she starts washing the dishes after they finished lunch. With her eyes widening in surprise she rushes back into the room, telling the family of three to hide as she's drying her hands in her apron before making her way to the door.

After taking a deep breath she grabs the handle and opens it. The next thing she knows is being pushed to the side as a figure storms in past her without a word. A gasp leaves her lungs as her back lightly collides with the wall, head turning to watch as the soldier barges in the house.

What is going on? Has someone found out about them?

With a hand reaching behind her back she pushes herself off the wall and hurries behind the man. Trying hard to sound completely calm and innocent she asks him what is going on, but he only barks back something almost inaudible - only a few German words reach her ears.

The soldier is moving with such speed that she hasn't got a single chance to get a better look at his uniform as he's entering every room one by one. Who is he? Worry swiftly floods her veins - more importantly, what is he looking for?

She can only pray the family has had enough time to properly hide.

As he reaches that door, she holds her breath back, repeating her little prayer like a mantra inside her head. The man comes to a sudden halt just as he steps through the doorframe and in an instant fear makes her blood turn freezing cold. She carefully moves closer to glance inside next to his body, not knowing what to expect.

And what she sees makes everything else in her mind disappear - just the thoughts of all hell breaking loose any time now move around inside.

Her best friend crouches on the other side of the room, clearly frozen mid-movement as her body is still half out of the hiding spot, eyes wide as she stares at the soldier, not a single muscle moving. It's like everyone's got frozen in time, none of the three people makes a move.

Liebgott's mind slow to catch up to what he sees - he didn't expect to see that as he rushed through the house. He's only been trying to decide whether it's a good place for Easy's HQ, as he has been ordered to do when Winters sent him ahead of the company.

His eyes then start moving around the room, trying hard to find a good reason as to why that girl is half inside the wall. A book is laying on the table next to the door, open at around the middle. With one glance at the pages he recognises the letters of the hebrew alphabet, and suddenly it all makes sense.

She's a Jew.

His breath hitches in his throat as he struggles to comprehend this new information, and just in that very moment the silence is broken by a voice. And it's not coming from either of the two girls in the room - more like it's coming from inside the wall.

One simple sentence, ending with a Yiddish term of endearment - one he can perfectly understand. It came from a woman, asking the girl crouching facing him from across the room why she's stopped moving.

There are more Jews in there.

His lungs fill with a sharp breath he's taken and he spins around, staring straight at the girl who opened the front door only minutes prior. The question must be clear in his eyes as she starts stammering in defense, her voice audibly shaking.

Joe shakes his head, stopping her mid-sentence. "No, they're Jews, I can see it," he says in perfect German, and the already pale girl suddenly seems even whiter.

He swiftly grabs her arm and pulls her in the direction he remembers finding the dining room in, trying to find a chair for her to sit down on, as she's visibly close to fainting - though the reason behind it he can't find.

(y/n) flinches with utter fear, weakly trying to resist being pulled away - he most probably is now taking her away to kill her, right? He's a German soldier, that's what his job is. But no matter how hard she tries to wiggle away, his grip is too tight around her arm and she can't do a thing.

Just when they arrive to the dining room and he kind of pushes her into one of the chairs is when Joe realises that she's scared of him - she immediately pushes the chair further away from him as soon as he lets go of her. So that's why she's shaking so bad.

"No, wait, don't be scared," he rushes to say. "I'm a Jew too."

This finally breaks the scaredness - instead her eyes fill with utter confusion. Her forehead wrinkles as she tries to make sense of what he's saying. How can a German soldier be Jewish? It makes absolutely no sense.

With a sudden wave of suspicion she moves her glance down to his uniform, examining every detail she can lay her eyes upon.

Is he not German?!

Suddenly she can see differences - details about his uniform that she's never seen on a German soldier before, and she's seen her fair share of those in the past years.

But if he's not German, who is he and what is going on?

She takes a still shaky breath and looks back up into his eyes - seeing the waiting expression on his face as he's standing there in patient silence for her to say something.

"Are you-" Her voice cracks mid-sentence. It's not good. She clears her throat and tries again. "Are you German?"

All of a sudden he bursts out laughing - so loud, and somehow so dark that her eyes widen once again. She just can't decide if it's from fear again, or only surprise.

A minute or so goes by with nothing but Joe laughing - this must be one of the most hilarious things he's heard in the past couple years. That he is a German.

Then his laughter finally quietens down to slight chuckling and he speaks up once more to confirm the truth. "No, of course not," he shakes his head in amusement. One look in her eyes tells him that somehow she still has no clue about his nationality, so he opens his lips again to give an answer to her question in advance. "I'm American. Don't worry, you're not in trouble for that," Joe points back in the direction of the room with the hiding spot above his shoulder.

A loud sigh escapes her lungs, her shoulder visibly falling a bit as she slumps more into the chair. It feels like years worth of stress and nervousness have just come to an end - it's truly like an enormous stone has rolled down from her chest and shoulders. She somehow feels free again for the first time in years.

Relief completely replaces the worry and fear in her veins as all other thoughts leave her mind. She's not gonna die. At least not today.

"They're Jewish," the soldier speaks again - and it's not a question. More like a statement.

(y/n) nods, unable to say a word as she's still overwhelmed with her new feelings.

"You're hiding them?"

She just raises an eyebrow, and Joe mentally slaps himself - what a stupid question. He could've might as well just asked her the colour of the wall.

"Since when you've been hiding them?" He corrects his question.

"Ever since the whole thing has started," she answers, her voice so quiet it almost disappears in the air between them.

"Wow," Liebgott breathes out before he can stop himself. He stares at the girl in disbelief. She looks so innocent and young - she's probably one or two years younger than him. How could she pull off something such a thing? Such a dangerous and pretty reckless thing?

"Esther is my best friend, she's been ever since we were little kids, they all are like a second family to me, I've spent most of my days with them," (y/n) explains, the relief causing her to ramble and Joe - for about the first time in his life has to struggle to keep up with the German words that come flying out past her lips. "I just had to help them, you know. I couldn't just leave them here."

"Where's your own family?"

"My parents left to France to be further away from the chaos, and my brother joined the Luftwaffe, and since then I haven't heard from none of them."

"Why didn't you leave with your parents as well?" The young soldier keeps asking, moving closer to the table and sitting down on a chair on the opposite side, facing her. Pushing his M1's strap down his shoulder he places the weapon on the table, pushing it only a little further in order to calm the girl more. He knows he probably shouldn't do this - and keep Winters waiting, but he's too curious to stop himself, he has to hear the rest of her story.

"I love this town, I was born and raised here," she shrugs as if it's obvious. "But more importantly, I didn't want to leave and let innocent people like my best friend's family suffer. I wanted to stay and fight back as good as I could."

Joe subconsciously mumbles under his breath before he can stop himself - words that praise her absolute bravery, words that give away his true feelings he suddenly feels towards her - then he has to move his gaze away from her, fearing that she sees the embarrassment in his eyes. He tries hard to think of another question while also trying hard to forget the look of the half-smiling expression that took over her face just a moment before - it does nothing good for his heart.

"Did you make that hidden room yourself?" He asks in the end, thinking back to what he saw in the room.

"Oh," she giggles - and it's the prettiest sound he's heard in a very long time. "No, my father made it when me and my brother were young and often played hide and seek. I just improved it a little so they can fit in more comfortably."

Liebgott hums, not knowing how to tell her - or if he should even tell her in the first place - how absolutely super impressed she left him with every single thing she's told him and what he's seen. It's one of the craziest things he has ever heard, and he had a fair share of unbelievable stories told to him in his life. He simply couldn't even imagine how on Earth this girl could manage to do this - and not get caught. Throughout the whole war.

In that very moment he swiftly decides that he'll go and find another house for the HQ, and that he'll somehow get back to this particular one, no matter what it takes. He wants to get to know her better. He has to get to know her better.

She's the most incredible woman he's ever heard of, read about or met. She's a woman who fits in the stories of the comics he's been reading his whole life - as the protagonist, the hero. He can't leave this town without hearing more about her, seeing her face more. That would be the biggest regret of his whole life, he can already tell.

But for now, he has to leave. It wouldn't be a good idea to keep his officers waiting even longer.

He stands up, fingers reaching out to grab his M1 before looking back into her eyes. Damn, he doesn't even know her name.

"I have to head back to my company, but I'll come back later, if that's okay with you."

Her eyes are already on his, seemingly staring straight into his soul with that intensity that lays in her (y/e/c) orbs. The girl then rises to her feet - still never breaking the eye contact.

Thoughts race inside her head, and it's like an angel and a demon are sitting on each of her shoulders, one telling her to say no whilst the other trying to convince her to say yes.

What if he only wants to use her? What if he only wants to sleep with her? Maybe force her to do so, threatening her with his knowledge of the Jewish family. He might not even be who and what he says he is. How could she know?

But on the other hand, there is this feeling she has about him. A feeling that tells her that nothing she previously thought will happen. She doesn't know what it is, but it's there, right in her chest, and she can't fight it. He seems genuinely curious and impressed, and honest. And she feels a pull towards him. She wants to see him again.

In the end, the devil on her shoulder wins, and she simply nods - right before she could change her mind.

"I'm Joe," the young soldier moves around the table, one hand held out towards her.

A glance cast down and right back up to his face she takes his hand and gives it a shake, holding onto it tightly, as if only to let him know how strong she actually is.

It probably works, 'cause he raises an eyebrow, slightly tilts his head and the corners of his lips curve up into the smallest smirk she's ever seen - but it's there.

"(y/n)," she eventually answers with her own introduction.

A few seconds pass and neither has let go of the other's hand, not yet. They just stand there, staring into each other's eyes, only the small noises of them breathin breaking the silence.

Then Liebgott blinks, clears his throat, pulls his hand out from her grip and instinctively places his fingers upon his weapon hanging from his shoulder whilst nodding towards her as a gesture of saying goodbye without words.

She watches as he turns around and walks out from the room, and after a tiny, happy sigh she follows the sound of his steps.

Just as he opens the front door and moves through it is when she arrives to the hall. Joe glances back over his shoulder for one last time, offering her a small smile, then looks back ahead of him and continues his walk as if nothing has happened. None of the past dozen of minutes.

(y/n) leans against the doorframe and watches him right until he disappears in the distance with a dreamy look in her eyes.

She can't wait until he comes back again.

.::the end::.

(might write a part two if i'll have time and you'd like to read it)

my masterlist | my hbo war masterlist

[wanna be added to my taglist?]

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amnxsia · 3 years

Photo

ilanga

(n.) a person who will forgive anything the first time, tolerate the second time but never a third time.

A/n: Inspired by my brainrot. Everything that is said in German will be translated and bolded.

Taglist: @shisoaya, @callmepromise, @namischild, @namrekcaivel, @icedkoffees, @erens-piss-cleaner, @sofi-yeager, @peachysimp, @fiaficsxo, @eremiie, @odmlevis, @weepinglevi

Summary: Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction is what brought it back.

Content: dom and sub undertones, smut. nsfw minors dni

Trigger Warnings: manipulation, public sex, dacryphilia, branding, cigarettes, dedegration, slapping.

Word Count: 2241

Forgive anything the first time.

“Jean how many times do I have to tell you, Y/n isn’t allowed to drink.” Eren says staring daggers at him.

“And why the hell shouldn’t she? Just because you’re her boyfriend doesn’t mean you can tell her what she can’t and can do it’s a fucking party for god sakes Jaeger.”

“Ja, warum kann ich nicht etwas trinken Eren?” You say standing behind Jean. with big glassy doe eyes.

“Yeah why cant I have a drink Eren?”

Eren ignores you. Knowing that this is your first strike.

“You know what fuck you Jean, and fuck this party. I’m going home.”

Ignoring whatever else Jean has to say Eren pulls you towards him and whispers.

“Dies ist dein erster Schlag, also viel Spaß Prinzessin”

“This is your first strike so have fun princess.”

Ah there it is, his dominance.

One of the many things that ran straight to your core. Making you clench your legs, one of the many things to love about Eren Jaeger.

Even if you manipulated him time to time you would always be running back to him like a lost puppy trying to find it’s lost owner.

“Jean I’m leaving the party too. Have fun.”

“Whatever.”

You walk out the door, seeing a figure sitting on the curb.

“So bald zurück? Ich dachte, du würdest Spaß mit Pferdegesicht haben und einen Sturm kichern” Eren saying with a smirk.

“Back so soon? I thought you would be having fun with horse face and giggling up a storm.”

“Eren we don’t have to talk in German all the time.” you say giggling while bending down to sit next to him.

“Oh? But I thought you loved it when I talked in German, you would always clench you thighs whenever I would speak, it’s cute that you actually thought I didn’t notice.” Eren says sliding closer to you dipping his hand at your cunt rubbing it very slowing.

“Du bist schon so nass und ich habe dich noch nicht einmal richtig berührt“ Eren whispers in your ear. Shoving your panties to the side and teasing your folds.

“Your so wet already and I havent even touched you properly yet.”

Now sinking a slender finger inside stretching you out, you bit your lip to contain the moans.

Eren smirks.

“What’s wrong baby? just because we’re in public doesn’t mean you have to be quiet, no as far as I am concerned you can say my name no you can moan it, and not in German in English for everyone to hear. I want everyone to know that this pretty cunt belongs to me and only me.” He says while laughing.

“Im sorry.”

Eren stops.

“What was wrong sweet pea?” He says no teasing or playfulness laced with voice just genuine concern.

“I said I’m sorry. I just don’t want other girls all over you .” You say with hot tears streaming down your face.

Ah.

Needy baby.

“It’s okay baby, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’ll stop bringing them.”

Eren kisses you and ruffles your hair.

“I’ll see you later.”

Tolerate the second

You were doing it again.

Pissing him off.

You said you were sorry the last time, but you also loved how angry he would get if you were around other guys.

Like now.

You were sandwiched between two guys who were getting handsy with you, but you could care less about Eren and his anger issues, you would win this bet and that would be it.

But unbeknownst to you Eren was staring at you with nothing but a loving smile at you. Sitting down in a chair with his legs crossed, he was wearing black all over, sliver rings to compliment his fingers, his hair pulled back into a man bun with a few baby hairs sticking out, and black leather boots.

You looked over to him to see if he reacted in any type of way, but you started to panic when you saw him looking your way with a smile on his face. You get up and usher everyone out.

“Party’s over.”

When everyone had dispersed you focus your attention to Eren who would still looking at you with a smile on his face.

“Oh? Party ist vorbei, wie kommt es, dass es gerade interessant wurde.”

“Oh? Party's over how come it was just getting interesting.”

“Warum benimmst du dich so?”

“Why are you acting like this eren?”

“Because you think I’m fucking stupid that’s why.”

“Excuse me?”

Eren ignores your statement.

“Lass diese Jungs und diese Wette nicht zu deinem verdammten Kopf gehen, denn ich werde dich wieder zur Relalität bringen.”

“Don’t let those boys and this bet go to your fucking head because I will bring you back down to reality.”

“Warum nimmst du teil, wenn du schon wütend wirst? Ich beweise jetzt schon einen Punkt und die Wette ist noch nicht einmal beendet.”

“Why are you participating if your getting mad already im already proving a point now and the bet is not even finished.”

Eren pulls you closer to him and spreads your legs with his knee

“You’ll figure it out tomorrow if you piss me off again.”

But never a third time

Today was the last day of your bet with Eren. And of course you wanted to see what he had planned for you, even if that meant burying your own grave. Today was your 2 year anniversary and later tonight you would be going to a dinner with Eren, family and friends so they could meet him.

This was the perfect opportunity for all of Eren’s wrath to come down on you.

You decided to wear the shortest skirt you could find. You did your makeup, hair, and decided to put some rings on your fingers just like Eren.

After completing your look you walk downstairs to see Eren in a suit with rings on his fingers and a single earring dangling from his earlobe.

“Hey.”

“You look nice today.”

“Thanks.”

The car ride to the restaurant was very quiet, slowed and reverb music was playing from the radio.

Now at the restaurant Eren greets your parents and close friends.

Now everyone is in their seats before a waitress comes up and asks them what they would like to eat.

You look at your menu and say what you want and family says they want whatever you order.

Someone else walks in the restaurant with a smile and a box in their hands.

And it begins

Your mother pats you on your shoulder to tell you;

“Einer Ihrer Freunde hat etwas, das er Ihnen schenken möchte”

“One of your friends have something they want to give to you as a gift.”

Eren looks to the stranger with a concerned face, and then back to you.

“Wer ist er?”

“Who is he?”

You look at Eren trying contain a laugh.

“ein Freund.”

“A friend.”

Before Eren can say anything more the gentleman comes up to you and wraps his arms hugging you very tightly not to tightly just enough to give you affection.

“Hallo, es ist schon eine Weile her, wie geht es dir?”

“Hi it's been a while how are you?” He says with the biggest smile on his face.

“Ich war gut froh, dass es dir gut geht. Ich habe von einem kleinen Vogel gehört, dass du ein Geschenk für mich hast.”

“I've been good glad you are doing well I heard from a little birdy that you have a present for me.”

He blushes and he looks down at the floor, you take your hand and motions his head to look at you.

“Speak.”

And so he does.

“Ja, es ist ein Geschenk, es ist ein Ring mit meinem Namen, ich denke du wirst es mögen.”

“Yes it is a gift, it's a ring with my name on it i think you will like it.”

And thats when he takes out the ring and places it on your and then genty kisses your hand and wrists.

And thats when all hell breaks loose.

Eren quickly gets up from the table, dashes to your side and grabs your from the hem your shirt.

“Entschuldigung für die Unannehmlichkeiten, aber wir müssen jetzt gehen.”

“Sorry for the inconvenience but we need to leave now.”

Before either of your parents could say anything both you and Eren were out of the restaurant and heading to the car.

Eren throws you into the car, but his face is unreadable which is turning you on even more. He gets into the car and starts to drive, his knuckles white from how hard he’s gripping the steering wheel. Unlike from before he doesn’t allow you turn on the radio to ease the tension.

Now getting out the car you and Eren walks towards your shared house, he lets you enter the house first after entering the house he slams the door, making chills run down your body.

“Eren was ist los?”

“Eren what’s wrong-”

Eren slaps you.

“Jetzt will die Hure plötzlich reden?”

“Now the whore wants to talk suddenly?”

“Kleidung aus und auf allen vieren auf dem Boden.” Eren says while walking towards the living room.

“Clothes off and on all fours on the floor.”

And without a thought you discharge all of the clothes on your and make your way to the living to see Eren staring down at the floor with a cigarette between his slightly chapped lips, momentarily exhaling and inhaling the puffs of air.

“Schau nicht ohne Vorahnung auf.”

“Don't look up without permission.”

Eren takes another inhale of his cigarette.

“Ich habe dir gesagt, lass diese verdammte Wette nicht zu und andere Jungs gehen dir in den Kopf.”

“I told you dont let this fucking bet and other boys go to your head.”

And with that Eren grabs both of your wrists and gently plants the cigarette on your wrist.

“This is where he kissed you at right? This is where he planted those disgusting lips on you.”

You buck your hips to try and loosen his grip on you but to no avail.

“Answer me.”

“Ja.”

“Yes.”

“Now answer me this. Why are you letting other asshole touch you.”

“Eren-”

He pushes the cigarette down more on your skin, burning you a bit.

“Answer.”

“I was just accepting a gift from him, it didn’t mean anything I swear.”

“Now why would I believe you? This whole week you’ve been trying to piss me off and you know what y/n, have you succeeded in doing that so I’m having a hard time believing in anything that you say right now.”

Eren let’s his grip on your wrist goes, and places the cigarette in the ash tray. And then grabbing your neck up so you were both eye to eye.

“Tell me the truth and I’m all yours baby.” He said lightly licking your neck.

“Explain it all in German for me.” He said adding on, crossing his legs.

“Ich wollte mich wütend machen, damit du mich so hart ficken kannst, so gut, ich liebe es so sehr, ich liebe dich so sehr.”

“i wanted to make mad at me so you could fuck me like so hard, so good, i love it so much, i love you so much.”

You exhale, tears running down your face, you start to rut your bare cunt against the hardwood floor.

Your crying and the sight of you trying to get off on the floor went straight to Eren’s dick.

Eren starts to unbuckle his pants, his freed cock slapping aganist his abdomen.

“You think you can handle it baby?”

“Mhm yes- I know I can, I’ll be good again I promise, I’ve been acting so terrible these past few weeks and making you angry m’sorry Eren.”

And with that Eren bridal carries you to your shared bed room and gently puts you down.

“Open.”

And you do opening your mouth wide, Eren sticks two of his fingers in your mouth.

“Do I need to prep you?”

You shake your head no.

Eren smirks “Good girl.”

And with that Eren enters your hole.

“I love you, you know that right?” Eren says playing with your hair.

“Yes I know.”

“And everything I do is for you remember that. From the way I fuck you, from the way I do all of acts of service to words of affirmation there all for you and no one else.” He says finally moving the once quiet filled house now turning into sounds of skin slapping, panting that would last all the way into the evening then into the night.

Next day

You woken to the morning rays that were peeking out from your windows. Turning over you see that Eren had left but to where you wonder. Not that it matter you don’t care about anyone else but him, only him and him alone matters.

Somewhere far away, Eren had a box in his hand and a note along with it. He was at a house your parent’s house. Now knowing that your parents didn’t ever want to you to be with him he knocks on the door before setting the box and the note on the welcome mat and then walking away, hopping into his car.

The box being a wedding invation and a note saying; “Wenn du versuchst, für mich zu kommen, blühe ich weiter <3″

“You try to come for me I keep on flourishing. <3″

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alltherelicsofalifelonglived · 2 years

Text

i played amnesia: rebirth and i really liked it and have some Thoughts(tm):

non-spoilery:

- once again mad respect to frictional games for being the only people who arent afraid of nudity. no censorship underwear.

-theres a non-spook mode for if you hate being chased by stuff

- diversity win! this guy who's the most pathetic little meow meow is gay!

- i didn't have to look up any walkthroughs!

-i tried it with both spooks on and spook off and having spooks on is better. embrace the spook.

-game has some pretty visuals and a neat story, and while i wish choices throughout the game mattered, there are different endings. p good game.

SPOILERY BEYOND HERE(do readmores even work anymore):

[[MORE]]

-as a trans(tm) the first person pregnancy was uhhhhhhhh. dont like that. but that feeling didnt last long, mostly because tasi was so happy about having a baby. its cute.

-that being said i didn't want to run around and jump and climb because TASI UR PREGNANT STOP DOING THAT

-it felt so much less lonely than the other two, it was nice to have a list of people that you were trying to find and meet up with

- i like how yasmine still tried to help even though she was becoming a harvester, she's such a sweetie

- dr. metzier was so mean to tasi, like dude. even if tihana hadn't been the one to bring down the plane, and the one to curse everyone, tasi still would have been in the right to keep her baby. everyone died because tihana killed them. none of it would have happened if she had just minded her own buisness, but the doc was just. so angery at tasi?? dude.

-at the room full of harvesters i straight up opened the door, saw that, closed the door and turned around

- shadow seems like a manifestation of all the pain inflicted on the other world, like its the opposite of the vitae. could b wrong but thats just my onion.

- best ending is the fuck u lady ending even though the shadow eats you and your baby

-hhh i wanna know more about the other world politics, especially about people fighting against the empress

Opinions on characters(that actually speak more than like. 3 words.):

Hank- hands down best dude. total bro, i just wish he didn't die by being hanged by the cable when you use the elevator. that was a bit. mm. tasteless? tone deaf? maybe dont hang one of the two black characters frictional games??

Alex- *insert second diversity win joke about rich buisnessman having the saddest most pathetic little meow meow as a boyfriend*

Richard- quality representation for us useless gays. terrified little meow meow. on a more serious note, i clocked him and alex from the first photo, and im glad tasi confirms that they're in a relationship, and that when you find richard, he's calling out for alex. i really hoped that you'd be able to stop tasi by struggling, but not so. i think it would have made for a neat thing if you had a choice with both him and the doc.

Dr. Metzier - speaking of the doc, i did not see him stealing the baby coming. he's such a jerk for blaming tasi, "oh you'd put the lives of all of us behind that of your child" like no my dude. if someone locked you in a room and said they were going to start shooting people if you didn't give them your baby, you wouldn't be the one responsible for the people being shot.

Leon- might be the only person from the Cassandra to survive? ik he looses his hand but he's still alive after. thats gotta suck, bc he's stuck in the catacombs/hunting grounds with all the other harvesters, so he's probably going to loose himself. i feel bad for him even though he's Pretty Dang Racist, bc he didn't do or say anything outright until after being harvesterized, so i think that had things gone normally and everyone got to the gold mine ok, he might have been able to Stop Being So Racist.

Tasi- legit didn't touch the laudnum after i realized she was pregnant, only to discover there was no effect on her. she's a nice lady, sucks that the empress decided she wanted tasi's baby. "hold x to check in on your baby" is something im going to say now.

Salim- aww cute husband shame he's fuckin dead. i wasn't expecting to find him alive but i still got real sad when i did find him. i like the details that tell you your marriage licence got denied and the photo saying 'how about we do anyways'

Yasmin- even as a harvester she's friend shaped. even puts her leg in a bear trap bc she doesn't want to hurt tasi. 10/10 yasmin is best friend in this game

Empress Tihana - i don't believe for a second she really meant any of what she said about saving tasi from the desert because a, she's the one who brought down the plane, b, she's sustained by endless torturing and claims she's not a monster, so forgive me if i dont think she's being honest. c, the major hazards of this particular area of the desert are her harvesters, actually. the entire crew of the cassandra, the french fort, the village, all those people are dead because she wanted someone else's baby. love her design tho very cool.

#long post #amnesia: rebirth #anyways these are just my Onions on the subject #the game was free on epic games a little while ago

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darealsaltysam · 4 years

Text

I WATCHED THE ELECTION RESULTS STREAM (once more, wilbur’s pov) AND OH GOD THIS IS PAIN

1. HOLY SHIT SCHLATT’S LAUGH NEVER FAILS TO DISSAPOINT

2. god the banishment.... wilbur and tommy running into the woods through the night... niki being the only one to speak up against schlatt... tubbo being pulled into it all... GOD ITS SO GOOD WHY IS IT SO GOOD

3. techno’s tweet sounds like something that would be posted together with a promotional poster for a movie where a beloved character comes back, absolutely brilliant mr. blade

4. GOD THE WHOLE WALL SECTION. WILBUR SINGING, TALKING ABOUT HIS SON, NIKI SEEING HIM FROM THE DISTANCE AND HIM WALKING AWAY, GOD IT WAS ALL SO PERFECT ???????????

5. wilbur has trust issues aimed specifically at americans (and eret) because of everything that happened now, this poor boy cant even trust the blade

6. “I’m gonna make schlatt pay for this”

7. THEM PLANNING TO TAKE OFF THE UNIFORMS IS SO SAD BUT ITS ALSO SO IMPORTANT TO EVERYTHING GOD IM SCREAMING (also “i can’t go back to my old skin wilbur, it has schlatt’s suit and it HURTS”)

8. TECHNOBLADE IS GONNA TRAIN THE BOYS !!!!!!!!!!

9. wilbur trusting tommy with his diamond armor just shows how far theyve come... and... “i trust you, youre the best right hand man i could have ever asked for”, AAAAAAAAAAA

10. technoblade cant roleplay and hes just there with his monotone voice... i mean go off king, we stan a man whos done with all this shit and just wants to stab some people. and this quote of them talking about their past on the earthsmp specifically shows it;

tommy, all emotional: good talking to you again big man

techno:

techno: didn’t we just talk yesterday?

11. EVERYONE’S REACTION TO TECHNO LOGGING ON IS GOLD, LIKE NIKI THERE IN CHAT GETTING ALL EXCITED KNOWING THERE’S A CHANCE FOR L’MANBURG I LOVE HER-

12. wilbur breaking down over the destruction of l’manburg while schlatt wanders below, with tommy pulling techno away and telling him to give wilbur space- god why is all of this so CINEMATIC? ITS JUST MINECRAFT-

13. SCHLATT SAYING HE’LL CHANGE THE NAME OF THE COUNTRY AND NIKI TELLING HIM HE CANT DO IT AND SCREAMING AND HIM TELLING HER TO SHUT UP IS AN ACTUAL MOVIE SCENE THIS IS A MOVIE THIS ISNT MINECRAFT ANYMORE THIS IS-

14. “you’re going to pay for this” - why did niki sound so menacing when she said that what the fuck?????????? i didnt know this pure little sunshine could do that????????????

15. manburg??? MANBURG?????

MANBURG??????

16. “TECHNOBLADE STOP LOOKING AT THE FUCKING DOG”

17. just...

Wilbur: Tubbo, can you be my Hercules Mulligan?

Tubbo: I can get the information and then smuggle it! :D

Tubbo: I got that reference! :DDDD

18. the first time wilbur said something mean/aggressive to tommy in this stream was when he mentioned talking to schlatt.... like im sorry if that doesnt tell you everything you need to know about the relationships of these three i dont know what will

19. TECHNO POTATO FARM BOTTOM TEXT

20. quackity broke nihachu out of prison?????? are they on the same side???? could it be quackity realized that being by schlatt’s side is a bit more than he bargained for?????? the intrigue....

21. “this is what i listened to with jschlatt on what should have been his only night on this server” okay tommy COMING ON A LITTLE STONG THERE-

22. another gold quote...

Techno: If I see an opportunity to assassinate the president, do I take it?

Tommy: Yes!

Wilbur: No! Absolutely not!

Tommy: Right, of course not!

23. TYLER “NINJA” BLEVINS???? THE TYLER “NINJA” BLEVINS???? ON DA DREAMSMP IN A WEEK??????

24. wilbur calling the country manburg and immediately throwing up is about what i expected from this “peace talk”

25. wilbur i know you have trust issues now but if you don’t risk techno on your side you will literally die there is no other outcome to this honey please let yourself be helped jfc

26. the gang desperately trying to come up with a name while low-key getting sad over loosing l’manburg and techno just in the background going “if that’s our name im switching sides” and “my standards are low but not that low” has energy i cant quite place but i love it

27. pogtopia it is i guess????

28. tommy and wilbur getting straight up dreamsmp war ptsd when they found the bunker they hid in is some, once more, movie-tier stuff. i mean, what else to do when the heroes are already down than to beat them down further?

29. “go potato boy go!!!”

30. god this whole stream was.... such a ride... holy shit... and this is only the START of this new arc??????? BOY I AM HYPED. like, MORE HYPED THAN IVE EVER BEEN FOR ANY SMP BEFORE

on another note... the new guy, huh? that must have been a wild ride for your first day on the smp.... hope you stick around, hbomb

#jschlatt #wilbur soot #quackity #tubbo #nihachu #technoblade #tommyinnit #mcyt #mcyt meme #schlatt2020 #schlatt administration #pog2020 #swag2020 #coconut2020 #itsfundy #hbomb94 #manberg #l'manberg #pogtopia

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elysianslove · 4 years

Note

Hi! Can you do roommates au for kuroo, oikawa, iwachan and atsumu?

hi!! thank you for requesting i hope you like these!!

kuroo tetsurō

kuroo as a roommate is both the best and worst thing that’s ever happened to you

for one, you always have a tutor in case you need help

and he’s really good at keeping you in check

will always make sure u eat, sleep well, manage your time

stuff like that

but

BUT

he’s so messy pls

like every room might as well be kuroo’s room because his stuff is always everywhere

this is only a good thing when his shirt/hoodies end up in your domain

bc this guy’s like 6’1? 6’2? doesn’t matter who you are his clothes are comfy whether they fit right or dwarf you

does not know how to clean

at all

like how difficult can cleaning be??? idk ask kuroo

he’s really good at picking up new habits though so he’s your designated cook

cleaning is on you, cooking is on him

i hope that’s okay w u bc otherwise u will not survive 😃

he’s so big on cuddling

he’ll ask you to sleep in the same bed constant nights��

at first it’s so ??? weird???

like why would u???

but then u find that it’s actually kinda nice

it’s a great way to destress bc as soon as ur cuddling ur mind just turns off

@ the tutor thing

he’s a really good teacher

but his notes?

get ur own <3

literally no one but kuroo can understand them so good luck g

anyways overall he’s a great roommate good job on scoring this hunk of a man 😻

oikawa tōru

first few months, he completely avoids you

weird i know i know

but oikawa is not someone that just opens up to anyone yk? he’s very selective. it takes a while for him to trust you

but you live in the same house so it’s inevitable

it’s not that he avoided you per se but he kept your interactions to a minimum

which had been fine by you! he was respectful of your privacy, did his part to maintain the house while you did yours, etc

it’s when he starts getting comfortable that’s the problem

i think it would happen spontaneously and you two would stay up s o late together out of nowhere and suddenly you’d know each other’s deepest darkest secrets

believes in those roommate bonding activities

friday nights are reserved for the two of you, and that’s a set rule. only extreme cases have priority over it

can’t cook and can’t clean

but he’s so good at lifting up his legs while you vacuum <3

literally if you leave for the weekend you come back to an unrecognizable home

the amount of shit he’s broken bc of volleyball like literally go play anywhere else

overall he’s a great roommate because he’s both respectful of your boundaries and genuinely really fun to have around

(so fucking annoying though sometimes you just wanna suffocate him in his sleep hehe)

iwaizumi hajime

best roommate hands down he’s the perfect candidate oh my god

he will cook

and he will clean

he’ll be respectful

he’ll help you with your work

only issue is he’s a bit standoffish you’ll think he hates you for the longest time

until you just straight up ask him “do you hate me?”

and he’ll be genuinely so shocked like “no! what? why would i live with you if i hated you? what?”

god he’s so precious

i see iwa as someone that likes routine

so it’d be great if you can adapt to that/adapt to his routine specifically

you two split the work evenly so well

like if he takes care of breakfast (cooks or it buys it), dinner is on you

spring cleaning is actually so fun with hajime because he actually puts in as much effort as you

but also

you’re blasting some music on the speakers and using the broom as a mic that he can’t help but let loose tbh

he learns your quips so well overtime it’s amazing he just

he just knows you so well is he psychic or some shit???

will never force you to like do any bonding activities but i see you two just playing a shit ton of boardgames together, things like monopoly

loser gets extra chores hehe

god i want roommate iwa in my life so bad

a really good roommate because of the fact that he’s super mature and a really thoughtful person in general

miya atsumu

worst one

he’s the WORST

like oikawa can’t cook or clean, but he has some redeeming qualities. atsumu?? none !

im kidding y’all he’s the cutest i would die to have him as my roommate

he’s so

energetic?

your first night as roommates he just waltzes into your room and drags you out to the living room where the tv is already set up, two large pizzas and so many wedges have been ordered, and drinks <3

spends the entire time getting to know you

he learns to live with you really easily tbh like he adapts so quick

he’s so used to sharing bc he’s a twin, so nothing ever properly bothers him

he can’t cook, but he does watch you and tries to learn from you

he’ll do very basic things like you can leave breakfast safely to him

after minimum 2 months of practice

he likes to be very involved and likes to involve you just as much

he’s not nosy he’s just curious leave him be 🥺

there is always one day a month where it’s just the two of you going out

to like a carnival

amusement park

ice skating

all that stuff. it’s necessary

i need to clarify that 3 am drives to get mcdonalds take out is a very regular thing with atsumu

driving up a hill and sitting on the hood of your car while you get some nuggets and stare at the city skyline beneath you

immaculate vibes

a really fun roommate tbh no regrets with this one you will never feel like shit and even if you do

what are the 3 am drives for amiright 😻

end note; i hope that was good, and that the requester and everyone else enjoyed that!! like always, requests are open <333

thank you to everyone that’s voted about the smau thing! i’ll wait a little while longer before deciding who won, and hopefully, i’ll have the first few chapters up soon!! mwah <3

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo x reader #kuroo headcanons #oikawa x reader #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa headcanons #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi hajime x reader #iwaizumi headcanons #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu x reader #atsumu headcanons #miya atsumu headcanons

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melancholycatastrophe · 3 years

Text

my thoughts on ep 4 of season 2 of euphoria becahse i finally got the chance to watch it

i hate everything

literally everything that happened is awful i hate this

i spent the entire episode wanting to curl up and die

why does sam levinson hate jules so much? why would he do this to her?

every time cassie is on screen i want to die of second hand embarrassment, like i cant believe im agreeing with nate but what the fuck is wrong with you?

sorry but her thought process is so???? "im going to blackmail you into being in a relationship with me because i think you're toxic for my best friend" pLEASE SAY THAT AGAIN BUT SLOWLY

CASSIE THAT IS YOUR BEST FRIEND'S ABUSIVE EX BOYFRIEND WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

also someone pls tell maddy that nate is never going to change, he's never going to get better. i know you want to be loved but you're not going to find love with nate jacobs

also someone tell jules that hooking up with elliot every time your relationship with rue becomes strained is Not A Good Idea

I fucking hate that we're getting the bare minimum for kat's and ethan's storylines, i hate that this has become the Cassie and Nate show

im serious i literally only want kat and ethan's plot at this point

i think ashtray knocked a few screws loose in cal's head

i literally cannot wait until he dies, i was so disappointed when he didn't get into a car crash

aaron must be so fucking confused he doesn't get into drama he's the disappointment of the family but he's chill and his dad is out here with his dick out pissing on the floor

"we all have our secrets" aaron has a piss kink and likes gangbangs how is that even close to whatever the fuck you're doing?

if that's what cal considers appalling he's gonna hate my ao3 history

also cal is straight up blaming his family for the way he turned out?? im sorry you couldn't be with your best friend but birth control is a thing? as well as abortions and adoptions?? divorce??? the family you choose to bring into this world should not be blamed for your actions

god i fucking hate cal

at this point the only characters i care about are rue, maddy, and lexi, everyone else is either irrelevant or fucking awful

(also i am aware that rue is also "fucking awful" but i am also aware that she's on drugs 24/7 and has an illness, while i don't excuse her behavior im not going to demonize her for it. she's not in a position where she can get better, and we all know she's going to get worse from here)

also how is rue not dead yet? she's done every drug under the sun, there's no way ppl look at her and think "yep, thats a sober person", she literally saw her dead father while high, she is literally flirting with death rn

the scenes with rue in church and her with her bed (which almost made me cry) and cassie crying surrounded by flowers are so beautiful

#euphoria spoilers #ig??? its been a couple days already

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reidswritings · 4 years

Text

even after all these years

word count; 7.2k

warnings; mentions of death, stalker stuff, mentions of guns, curse words, and angst angst angst

authors note; so this was like 3 days in the making, so i hope yall enjoy!! please let me know what yall think!! ignore any typos im doing my best 😁😁

two years ago;

“I’m done.” She had said after the door closed, once they were alone. Once there was no one to stop what was going to happen. Once there was no one to talk some sense into The Young Girl.

The Pretty Boy, who she had come to love more that she ever thought possible, was no longer standing pretty in front of her. His once love filled eyes—the hazel beauties that used to look at her with so much admiration now were void, cold— were holding back the tears she knew he so desperately wanted to let flow (but wouldn’t with her standing there). She knew that once she left him, he’d break down. She knew that he would spend all of his nights on the couch rather than the bed they shared for so long. She knew that he would rather die than look at the happy pictures on the walls sans the few that she had stuffed into her getaway bag. She knew him too well— she knew how he would react once she was no longer the love interest in his story.

She knew and yet she was still doing this to him. She was doing this to him— she was causing him so much destruction and pain, barely batting an eye at him. For being a profiler, he was shitty at reading people’s body language and emotions. Because to him, she seemed fine; she seemed like it was just another day. To Spencer, it seemed like she was bored. To him, it didn’t seem like she was also breaking. It didn’t seem like she was hurting just as much. Maybe if he was better, he would’ve seen. Maybe if he was better, he could’ve stopped it. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

The eyes that she had fallen in love with—that she was still hopelessly in love with— were dark, almost black. He had a white piece of gauze taped against his neck, covering a once life threatening bullet hole. There was a red spot, small bits of blood seeping through the stitches holding his skin together. If she wasn’t so preoccupied she would’ve thrown up from how much the injury bothered her. She would’ve gotten so worked up that she would’ve passed out.

Her eyes burned with tears, looking at the goddamn wound that started this all. The wound that ended their relationship. She blinked and it was over for her. Her façade dropped and her tears rolled over her eyelashes and onto her cheeks. Spencer’s arm twitched before he jerked it back to his side, fingers clenched. He wanted to wipe her tears away so desperately. Despite the words that had just passed her perfect lips, he still wanted to hold her like his life depended on it— because honestly, it really did.

She was his life preserver in the wild sea that was his life.

The Boy was holding his keys in his hands, jingling the metal with his fingers in attempt to calm his heart, his mind, his emotions. They had just gotten home. He was in Texas when it happened— he was in Texas working a case when he almost got himself killed. Thankfully, The Team had flew His Girl out and she had been the first face he saw when he finally woke up.

Alex, being the wonderful human she is, had just dropped the two off, leaving only after she admitted to Spencer that she was leaving, too. They had just gotten home and she was springing this on him, out of nowhere. She was doing this to him even after all the people that had already left him. She was doing this to him the same night one of his best friends had just left him. She was doing this at the most inconvenient time— not that any time would be better, he would still be loosing the love of his life either way.

He was sure he hadn’t heard her right. He was sure that he hadn’t just heard His Pretty Girl say the words he thought she’d never say. The words she promised him that she’d never use. She was doing the one thing he was most afraid of; she was abandoning him. . . just like everyone did.

His heart was beating so fast. It was so loud, he was sure she could hear him. He was on the brink of a panic attack. His breath was hitching and he couldn’t stop it. As big as his brain was, he couldn’t wrap his mind around what was happening. His mind was running a mile a minute, carrying a thousand thoughts with it— yet, none of the thoughts were helpful ones. There were no thoughts walking him through his breathing exercises, no thoughts telling him to calm down, no thoughts telling him to speak up.

The only thing on his genius mind was one sentence; She’s leaving me. She’s leaving me. She’s leaving me. She’s leaving—

So, he said, “W-What?” Breathless and choppy. He was having trouble focusing. He needed to sit down. He needed the world to pause for just one second. He needed to get his thoughts in order. He needed to sit, but his legs refused to move. He was stuck. He was stuck in this terrible, awful moment that his eidetic memory would never let him live down. He knew that he would think of this moment for the rest of his life with so much regret in all the things he didn’t say. But still, he was stuck, frozen.

Unable to fix things— unable to make her stay.

“Spence,” She paused, looked down and sighed. She couldn’t look at him. She couldn’t, because if she did she would wrap him up in her arms and never let him go again. She knew if he caught her eye that she would apologize until she was blue in the face. The girl refused to meet his eyes because she knew if she did that she wouldn’t be doing what she was doing. She needed to do this, she couldn’t back down now. “I. . . I can’t do this anymore.”

His voice was low, raspy and broken, “Do what. . .?” He knew what. He wasn’t dumb, he knew what she meant, but he needed to hear her say it. She had to say it or he wouldn’t ever let go. He would be stuck with her for the rest of time. He needed to hear her say it, even if that meant he would be more broken than he had ever been before. He needed this. He needed it even if it killed him.

Now she met his hazel eyes— her favorite part of him, she was committing it to memory because after this, she would never see him again. She knew that. She counted on that. “This, us. Spence, I almost lost you today. . . I can’t do that again. You’re— You’re everything, I-I— you’re my everything. I can’t ask you to quit your job, I won’t be that person. . . So, I’m removing myself. I can’t watch you get killed— I won’t do it, Spencer.”

Everything, all at once, became sharp. It was like his mind could finally form full sentences. He was full of ideas, he was full of air. He knew what he had to do. He knew how to keep her with him.

Before either adult knew what was happening, he was moving, quick on his feet, to the couch. He was throwing open his messenger bag, hands messily pulling things out. He was searching for his phone, he was searching for the one thing he could think of that would save him— save them.

“What are you doing?” Y/N asked him, moving behind him, reaching for his arm, trying to see what had him so worked up. He jerked away from her, grunting in the process. And again, with no words spoken, he was moving again. He was going too fast, he was going to tear his stitches, he was going to hurt his still healing wound. He was now moving into the kitchen, still looking, hope flooding his veins. This was his last chance, he knew that.

“Spencer!” She followed him, just as frantic as the newly hope-filled boy, “Did you hear me?”

She heard him let out a chocked sob, a broken laugh following— though, no humor was tied to it. She stopped in front of him, heart wild, anxiety flowing through her body. He was typing on his phone, chest raising and falling faster than she liked. The girl asked again, “What are you doing?”

He looked up now. His eyes were wild, more so than she had ever seen. He was so worked up that his body was literally twitching with each breath that passed his lips. It scared her, she had never seen him like this. She had never seen him so manic. It hurt knowing she was the cause.

The thought of him like this did nothing for her, though. She still continued on her path of destruction.

“I’m calling Hotch. Telling him I’m done.” He was bringing his phone up to his ear while his mind planned out the words he needed to say to get off The Team. His free hand was holding onto the counter, keeping himself straight up. His knuckles were turning white; Y/N was worried he would break his hand— or the old table. Either way was inadequate. Without it, he was afraid he’d fall to the floor in a mess of tears and anger.

He was doing it, he was doing it. He had figured a way to make her stay, he was going to do it. He would do anything to keep her with him.

The phone was ringing. It was ringing and Spencer could feel his panic draining away with each passing second, his boss was going to answer and everything was going to be alright. His boss, who doubled as his friend, was seconds away from answering the phone, he just knew it.

Everything was working itself out, this would be okay— that is until she intervened.

She was ripping the phone from his hands, hanging up in the process. Spencer felt his breath catch again, his voice was wild as he asked— screeched, “What are you doing?!”

The boy reached for the phone but she whipped it away from his reach, “Stop! Give— Give it back, Y/N!”

“No! I-I’m not letting you throw your life away for something so fucking stupid, Spencer!” Spencer watched her as she began to turn around, walk from the kitchen and probably his life. He couldn’t move again. His phone started to ring in her hands. They both froze, listening to the phone until it turned itself off.

He was following her now, like a lost puppy. He would follow her anywhere. She was the one. She was it for him. There was no one else.

“Y/N. . . please. Please, don’t do this.” He was broken, voice thick with tears. Her back was to him, he stepped closer, hand falling to her shoulder.

He heard her sigh, “Spencer, don’t make this any harder than it already is.”

He begged. He was more broken than she had ever seen him. More than when he lost Maeve. More than when he lost Emily. More than when Elle left him. More than when Alex told him about her son that was so similar to himself. More than when she walked out right after. More than when he talked about his mom. This was it— this was the worst for him. This was his rock bottom. He wasn’t sure he’d ever recover.

This was it for him— there was only darkness after Y/N. He couldn’t see a future without His Girl by his side.

There was no Spencer Reid without Y/F/N Y/L/N.

“Please don’t leave me. You—You promised.”

She turned to face him, face absent of all emotion. A complete 180 from only a few moments ago. She handed him back the outdated phone, along with his crushed up heart. “I lied.”

now;

It wasn’t very often Y/N crossed Spencer’s mind, but when she did it felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest all over again. Spencer’s had his fair share of trauma in his life, but by far Y/N was the one that hurt the most. After watching her walk out of his life—for ever, he’d assumed— he was sure that he wouldn’t ever recover. He did, of course.

It just took longer than he cared to admit.

It took a lot of shedding tears at the most inappropriate times (and things), more support from his friends than he ever thought he’d get, too many late nights playing that last night over and over again in his mind, and way too many calls to his sponsor.

If he was being honest, he was terrified that he would relapse. He was afraid that he would become his old self. He never wanted that; he hated that guy more than he hated anything in his life. He didn’t though— he made her a promise all those years ago and he didn’t break promises. She may have broken all hers but that didn’t mean he broke his.

He had gone those two years without ever seeing The Pretty Girl. He was grateful for that— he knew if he ever did see her again, he’d probably die. Well, not actually, but it would hurt like hell. He was more than positive that if he saw The Beaut that it would feel like he was dying. He knew this because that’s how he felt when she left all those years ago.

He tried not to dwell on that fact— he tried not to think about her.

He really did. He even tried to move on. He tried to love other girls, he tried to let himself go, he tried to find solace in women that weren’t her. It just never came— he never got the peace he so desperately craved.

She was just too unforgettable. She was everything— she was the air that he breathed, the ground he walked on, the smile that he got every time something wonderful happened.

She was everything and it was near impossible to let go of everything.

By now, he had convinced himself, with the help of his BAU family, that he’d never see her again. He had been convinced that it was really over. He was trying to convince himself to let her go. He was trying to lose that tiny piece of hope he carried in his heart with him with every day. He knew he had to let her go— he’d never get what he wanted again. It was time.

Too many years had passed, she wasn’t his anymore.

She was a pretty girl; she had probably settled down by now. She had probably settled for someone. She probably lived in some small town with a dog and a perfect boy that wasn’t him. Her life was probably everything she ever dreamed of.

He liked to think that. He liked to think that she had gotten everything she’d ever wanted. He liked to think that she was happy now. It kept him going, fantasizing about her and her perfect life— the one she created without him.

He never thought he’d see her again. And you know what? He was coming to terms with that.

That was, until the day he did. The day his heart stopped beating again. The day that his breath was knocked from his lungs. The day that he only dreamed about.

Until His Pretty Girl walked through those big glass BAU doors.

The Stunned Boy felt his body betray him. He was suddenly standing, mouth agape and eyes wide, unblinking. She had stopped too, arms clutching a ominous folder to her chest. Spencer drank her appearance in; she hadn’t changed very much. She was still as beautiful as he remembered. She looked absolutely gorgeous.

She was wearing a baggy sweatshirt— Spencer was more than positive that it was his— and frame fitting jeans. She had paired the comfortable outfit with the running shoes she had bought so many years ago. It was ironic because she had bought them to start working out, but never actually got around to doing so.

Spencer met her eyes. They hadn’t changed, they were still the eyes he had fallen in love with. He took a moment to notice that her face was void of any makeup— that was different. She looked tired too; her hair was thrown up into a messy bun, another thing that he noticed was different. She looked absolutely exhausted— he wanted to know why. He wanted to know what had happened to make her look the way she did; what had brought her back— back to him.

Both Spencer and Y/N were still unmoving, despite the world moving around them. His voice came out soft, and he was sure that she couldn’t hear him from across the bullpen. He wasn’t completely sure that he wasn’t dreaming. He spoke anyways, “Y/N?”

She blinked and then her world started again. Her breath was knocked back into her body; she was here for a reason. She needed help.

JJ walked through the doors, coffee in hand, tired eyes heavy on her face. She stopped in her tracks, suddenly awake, upon seeing Y/N. A gasp came from her lips, causing the spell between Spencer and Y/N to end. The unchanged girl turned to her old friend, the smallest smile he had ever seen on her face, “Hi.”

JJ smiled too, arms wrapping around the smaller girl before she could stop them. “Hi! Oh my god, hi! W-What are you doing here?”

Y/N’s eyes met Spencer’s again—he still hadn’t moved— then back to the blonde’s. “Um, I— Um, I need your help.”

Ever so curious, JJ nodded and led her old pal to her desk— the desk that was directly in front of SSA Spencer Reid’s. As they approached, Spencer felt his body lower itself back into his chair. Jennifer pulled an empty chair by her desk, motioning her friend to sit. Now with all three adults sitting, The Beautiful Blonde asked, “What’s happening?”

Spencer pretended to be busy, opening a case folder and staring. Y/N knew he was listening— it never took The Genius Boy more than, like, 10 seconds to read one page. Despite the listening ears, Y/N cleared her throat and began to speak.

She placed the folder onto JJ’s desk. It landed with a soft thump. The blonde flipped it open, keeping eye contact with her friend— soon to be victim of their next case. Page after page of threats laid there for anyone to see, it made Y/N feel quite exposed. She hated this; she hated that this was happening to her.

“I think— I think,” she paused, eyes flicking to Spencer, who was now watching the two girls with no shame, brows furrowed and bottom lip tucked under his teeth, “someone has been following me.”

Y/N felt her leg start to bounce in anxiety, she wished she could rewind the clock and convince herself not to come to the office. She wished she could’ve just pretended that she was safe and that nothing was happening to her. Spencer launched himself to his feet. His heart was anxiety-ridden “What?”

Both girl’s attention moved to The Frantic Boy. His mind was as wild as his curls; there was no way this was happening to him again. It wasn’t fair— why couldn’t his girls just be left alone?

“Um, yeah— I don’t know,” The Young Girl nodded, hands dismissing her thoughts. She felt dumb for coming back, and it showed. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t know where else to go. I know you guys are good at this stuff.”

JJ placed a sympathetic hand on Y/N’s arm, calling her attention back. “It’s good you did.”

The Blonde nodded along with her friend, “Okay, I’ll be right back. I’m gonna show this to The Team, see what we can do. Okay?” She was waving the blank folder in her hands as Y/N nodded. JJ stood, eyeing Spencer, a secret conversation happening between the two.

As soon as the girl left, Spencer claimed her seat. The boy leaned back, one leg crossing over the other— the iconic Spencer stance. Y/N’s hands were folded in her lap, eyes trained on her faded jeans, her mind willing her to be anywhere other than in front of The Boy she broke.

Spencer cleared his throat, His Pretty Girl looked up. “It’s good to see you. . . You, uh, you look good.”

He noticed the slight blush that appeared on her cheeks and nose. His cold heart softened ever so slightly. It was like a window had opened and his anger bit by bit flew out. Even after all these years he was still head over heals for her. She scoffed, tucking a piece of hair back into her bun, “. . . Shut up.”

“No, seriously. You haven’t changed at all.” More blush on her cheeks. More anger out the window.

Y/N licked her lips— a nervous tick, Spencer noticed, “Spencer, I—”

His heart sped up at her words, mind wondering what she was going to say. He hoped it was the apology he’d wanted for the past two years. He wished it was her asking for him to take her back. He wished, he wished, he wished.

“—Y/N, we’re ready for you now.” JJ’s voice interrupted the girl. Both Y/N and Spencer turned to The Blonde who was standing in the door of the round table room. Her hand was clutching the door as she leaned out. Y/N could see in the room, thanks to the floor to ceiling window directly next to Jennifer. The entire Team was inside, Y/N’s heart skipped a beat. She hadn’t seen any of them since she did what she did to Spencer. She wondered if they held any anger towards her. If they did, she deserved it. After what she did to Spencer she deserved everything unwelcoming and bad.

The Boy Wonder sensed her anxiety. He stood up, encouraged her to as well. Once she did so, he led her into the room, all their eyes landing to her. Spencer and His Pretty Girl came to a stop in the room, standing side by side. Y/N could feel the warmth radiating of the boy next to her, it calmed her nerves. She missed that— The Spencer Effect.

“It’s so good to see you again, Y/N,” that was Emily. Emily Prentiss; best friend of Spencer Reid. Her eyes, Y/N noticed held a bittersweet tone, “Wish it was under different circumstances, though.”

Her eyes looked at each and every member of The Team— none of them held any judgement or anger. Sure, some held sadness, others held understanding, but mostly, she saw compassion. She should’ve known; she used to spend every weekend with these people— she should’ve known they wouldn’t hold anything against her. She should’ve known.

Holding the pages that Y/N had printed out, JJ spoke first. “Well, it looks like its all been online?”

The victim nodded then coughed, “Well. . . actually, last night, I found this outside my apartment.” Out of her purse, she pulled yet another folder. Handing it to Spencer, she rocked on her feet. Inside the folder was picture after picture of Y/N. Many were captured when she was in the public eye, doing errands, hanging with friends, walking her pup. The part that caused Spencer’s blood to run cold were the few at the end.

Whoever was terrorizing Y/N, had managed to get into her apartment and capture pictures while she was sleeping, showering and even lounging on her couch— though the last bunch were from outside a window, most likely on her patio.

The boy tossed the pictures on the table in anger, the rest of The Team all began to sort through them. Surprising Y/N, and The Team, he did a full 180 and stormed from the room. Against her better judgement, she watched him go. Her eyes followed his every movement. Even after all these years, her eyes still watched every move her boy executed.

Before she could protest, her feet were carrying her to Spencer. He was pacing in front of his desk, hands nervously rubbing over one another. A tick that she remembered Spencer often doing.

“Spencer?” She asked. It was soft and innocent. It was everything Spencer had missed and that pissed him off.

“Y/N?” The tone surprised her. It was harsh, different from how he was treating her only a few minutes prior.

“Are you okay?” He laughed but didn’t answer her question, so she tried once more. “What’s wrong? . . . Spence?”

“No—!” He turned to face her now. His outburst surprised her (and apparently The Team too, as they had all stopped what they were doing to watch the horrific scene unfold. Yet none of the six moved to help The Broken Girl. She deserved that— she deserved the harsh words that were leaving the boy she loved so much), he continued, “You— you don’t get to call me that anymore. You lost that privilege when you left.”

That hurt, but she let him get it out. She knew it was years in the making— she knew it was healthy for him to express himself, even if it was all the anger he accumulated the past two years. He wasn’t yelling anymore, but his tone held all the anger he had been holding for the past two years. The boy’s hands made their way into his curls, pulling at the root. Y/N’s eyes were wide, mouth stuck open.

“Spencer, I-I’m sorry!” Tears were stinging her eyes, causing The Beautiful Boy to go blurry. She was absolutely positive that Spencer could see her unshed tears and she hated herself for it. She felt so fucking stupid. She shouldn’t have come— it was stupid to think he would ever help her.

“Yeah? Well, it’s too late now, Y/N.” He stepped towards her, she took a step back. His heart took the bullet, but he didn’t let it show. And before he could stop the word vomit, he brushed past her, knocking shoulders and said, “You shouldn’t have come back.”

She watched, blurry eyed, as the boy who she still loved ran up the BAU steps and back to the round table. She felt her breath hitch and then she felt her body lower itself into the chair that just so happened to be Spencer’s. She needed to get a control on her emotions. She couldn’t break down— she needed to help The Team help her.

Finding a stalker was hard work, apparently, because it was nearing the late hours of the night and there was still no face to the tyrant who so badly wanted Y/N’s attention. The Team was beginning to burn out, frustrated with the lack of answers. With the lack of safety for their old friend. With the lack of anything that wasn’t naked pictures of Spencer’s Old Girl and threats directed from some deranged place of love.

After Spencer’s meltdown, the two hadn’t talked— let alone made eye contact. It wasn’t without effort though, Y/N had been doing her best to get The Boy Wonder to look her way. Unfortunately though, he seemed to have his own thoughts on the matter. He had kept his back to her for the last three hours. Instead, focusing on the white board in front of him.

Taped to one side of the board were pictures of Y/N as well as the threats she had received in the past few months. Spencer could barely look at that side— he had been focusing his efforts on the left bit. His eyes had been locked on the few leads they did have. Which, to be summed up, was nothing. The Team had The Victim look at the men on the wall— none of which she knew, to their disappointment. This discovery drove them no farther than they were when the girl first walked in.

It was when Y/N was growing antsy again when Hotch’s rough voice spoke up. “We’re not getting anything done here. I think we take the night and come back with fresh eyes. Yes?”

A moment passed, then two. No one moved to disagree with the boss. Y/N stayed put in her seat, watching as her old friends began to pack up their belongings and file out— not without a few comforting words in passing. The Young Girl sighed, standing too, until she noticed a certain genius still staring at the wall, arms crossed.

He had abandoned the sweater that he once wore and was now sporting his well-fitting button down. And damn, it looked good. It was this deep maroon color that he wore so well (Her eyes committed the image to memory, not wanting to forget what a handsome hunk he was. Because, honestly, she knew after all this was done, she’d never be seeing him again). He had rolled the sleeves up to his bicep and unbuttoned the top two buttons, as well as losing the tie that once brought the whole look together. His beautiful curls were aggressively frizzy, sticking up in all the wrong places. It took everything in her not to reach up and fit it, like she used to.

She wanted to speak, she wanted to reach out to the boy. She knew that he hated her— she knew that he was beyond angry with her. She had so many things she needed him to know— needed him to understand. But, now wasn’t the time. Now definitely wasn’t the time to get into the nasty bits that was their past. No, now was the time to save her from the impending doom of this goddamn stalker.

“Spencer?” She asked, before she could stop herself. The boy turned, aggravated— with her, with the situation, with everything. His arms dropped, hands stuffing themselves in his pockets. He bounced on his feet, eyes tired. She continued, “I-I know that you hate me—”

“— I don’t hate you,” It was a lie. She knew that. She knew he was lying, she knew that he was just saying things to make her feel better.

So, she said, “Look, I, um— do you think— could you—”

The angry boy, who’s anger was once again draining with every breath— she had that effect on him—sighed and let the tension leave his body, “Do you want me to take you home?”

Sheepishly keeping the eye contact she had longed for, for so long, she nodded. The girl pulled her arms into her chest, “That would be really great. . . only if you can, though. I don’t want to put you out.”

Another sigh and another bullet to the heart— only this time to Y/N’s and not her ex lover’s. Spencer collected his few things and placed a soft hand on her back, leading her out. And just for a moment, for a moment, it felt like old times. It felt like everything was okay and that they were going back to their place and that everything was perfect.

Sadly though, life was no fairy-tale for the two and there was no perfect ending. The two once lovers sat in the boy’s car, silent and awkward. They were only a few streets from Spencer’s—their old place— place, stopped at a red light. The light was finding it’s way into the car, flashing a beautiful hue on the boy next to her. One of his hands was holding tight to the wheel, the other was laying on the arm rest between them. It took every bone in the girl’s body to not reach out to feel him— it had been so long. She missed his touch.

Maybe it was that feeling that made her do it. Maybe it was just how beautiful he looked that made her say it. Maybe it was the love that she still carried for him (even after all these years) that made her tell him.

“I’m afraid to be alone.” It was quiet and it held all the emotion she had been hiding all day. Spencer’s heart, though ever angry, broke a little for her.

The boy looked over, his mouth opening to ease her in whatever way he could. Before a word left his mouth, the light turned green and the spell was broken between the two. He pushed through, foot pressing on the gas, “You, uh, you can stay with me, if you want.”

“Really?”

“Well, i-it’s just until after we catch this guy.” He paused, blinker on, car passing, turning left, “Then, you go back to whatever life you created.”

“—I didn’t—”

“And then, I’ll go back to pretending you didn’t break me.” Yet another bullet to the heart. She deserved that though, she knew it too.

“I’m sorry, Spencer.”

Another pause of conversation, another blinker and another turn. Then they were home— they were back to Spencer’s. The walk to the small apartment wasn’t a long one. Especially with her body leading the way— muscle memory. What surprised her most was that he hadn’t changed much. Books still cluttered the tables and floors, globes and maps still sporadically placed around each room. The only thing that caught her eye was the lack of photos on the walls— what used to be a map of their relationship was replaced with a white wall.

“Looks the same.” she nodded, unmoving from her awkward stance by the door. “Looks like you.”

He snorted— though, there was no actual humor bedded within. Y/N watched as he stripped his bag from his body, then slipped off his shoes and off with his jacket. They stood together, wishing it was different. Wishing they could go back. Wishing there was no anger. Wishing, wishing, wishing. They’d be wishing for the rest of time.

Like before, like the last night, he was moving fast, breath hitching, “How long?”

“How long?” She echoed him, moving too. Still under the spell, she’d follow him anywhere.

“How long have you—” The boy cut himself off, hands in his curls, pulling them apart—unmarrying the best ones. “How long have you had this problem and not done anything?”

Before she had a chance to tell him, he was whirling on the poor girl, eyes wild, “You should’ve came to us— came to me.” His voice broke at the end, and Y/N could’ve kicked herself for causing him all this pain.

The heartbreaker sighed, “Spencer—”

“Y/N, I’m not playing around. How long?”

A sigh, a look to the floor, then back at him, “I don’t know, really. Maybe six months?”

Another sigh, this time from Spencer. He was sitting on the couch now, defeated, head in hands. “Maybe?”

“I’ve kind of had other things on my mind, Spencer!” It was bitter, angry, but not at him. It was directed at the jackass that had been stalking her. She joined him on the old seat, leaning back and pulling her legs off the floor.

A moment passed between the two— it wasn’t angry or awkward and didn’t hold any resentment, it was just comfortable and that surprised the two considering they hadn’t seen each other in over two years. It was just so easy to fall back into what they used to be.

She looked over at her boy. The window’s curtains were pushed open, the street lights making their way in. Spencer had turned on a lamp in the corner, as well. It was mixing with the lights from outside and casting a beautiful glow on her boy. He was looking down at his hands that were folded in his lap. A pensive look had made its home on his face.

“What’s goin’ on in that big brain of yours?” Y/N laughed, quiet and everything he had missed. The girl bumped shoulders with the boy next to her. He managed a smile, small, but still it was there. Y/N counted that as a victory.

The smile was gone as quickly as it appeared. Spencer cleared his throat and said, “Did you know that sixty-eight percent of stalking victims reported that their stalker physically harmed them?”

Another beat passed. Spencer had turned to look at her now, eyes heavy. Y/N was looking at her knees now, trying to ignore the fear that wanted to bubble up. “And?”

“A-And?” His whole body turned now, one leg folded between the two. His arm closet to the couch had made home on the top of the sofa back, fingers tapping— nervous tick. He had placed other hand on Y/N’s knee, trying to be comforting. She accepted his attempt, thankful for him. “Y/N, I’m saying that could’ve been you. You should’ve come to me when this first started.”

Y/N finally let her eyes meet his. And god, she could’ve cried right then and there. He was so beautiful. She missed him so much. Breaking her spell, she shook her head, “Spencer. . . I didn’t want to ruin anything you might’ve had going on.”

“Ruin any— Y/N/N, you’re not ruining anything by asking for help.” The boy sighed, looking away. His hand tightened once on her leg and her stomach erupted in the same way it always did with him around. Quieter, so quiet she almost missed it, he said, “The only way you’d ruin anything would be by leaving.”

“I’m sorry, Spencer.” The girl caught his eye again, shaking her head. Tears blurred her eyes again. Her hair, now out of it’s bun, fell into her face. With a shaky hand, Spencer batted it back behind her ear. A blush rose on her cheeks, as Spencer’s hand moved to wipe the few tears that had managed to fall. Her voice was thick with tears and it broke him. “I really am, you know?”

A sigh, then a nod from her boy. “Can I ask you something?”

“Always, Spence.” The name struck a cord in his heart, but he let it slide. He had no more energy to fight with her, no more energy to stay angry with his girl. He had nothing left. He was giving up his angry phase— he was letting it flow from his body like sand through sieve. He was giving in to her and the small bits of love that he still held for the beauty in front of him.

“Why’d you do it? Leave, I mean.”

Yet another bullet to her heart. “. . . I don’t know.”

He was moving again. His hands pulled away from her body as if she had burned him— because honestly, she might as well have. With that bullshit response, she might as well have slapped him— to him, there would’ve been no difference and the outcome would’ve been the same. He stood up, back to her. His hands came back up to his hair and she willed him not to pull apart the remaining curls. “That’s bullshit, Y/N! And you know it. . . I-I’m sorry. Just, just don’t lie to me anymore.”

Y/N stood too, arms up in surrender. Arms open like he had a gun pointed at her— because to her, there was no difference between the weapon he wore on his hip everyday and the weapon that spilled from his lips. His back was still to her, so she reached out to touch his shoulder. Careful, not to startle the boy. She wanted to see him, she needed to see him. For a second, her breath was gone, her mind taking her back to that night. She could’ve laughed at how similar the situation was, only reversed. Only now, she was the one begging to be touched, to be listened to. Only now, she was the one who was broken.

Instead of jerking away like he did all those years ago, he turned, sadness present on his face. Y/N’s heart broke for him. Y/N’s heart broke for herself. Her heart broke for the both of them. “I was scared, okay? I was just so scared.”

He turned fully, hands mindlessly finding their way to her hair. They tangled themselves in, tilting her head up. His voice was lower than she had ever heard. It was just barely above a whisper and she fucking loved it. If they were in a different situation, she would’ve been weak in the knees. “Scared? What, Y/N/N?”

She sighed, “I don’t know. . . Scared I’d lose you, scared you’d get hurt and I wouldn’t be there in time. I was just scared, Spence.”

Maybe it was her words that caused his reaction. Maybe the truth he could see behind them. Or maybe it was the emotion that felt so genuine. Whatever it was, he felt himself loosen. He felt the remaining anger dissipate, he was suddenly forgiving her for everything. Because he finally understood. He, for once, wasn’t having to jump to conclusions. For once, he felt they were equals. And because of this, he was pulling her closer, never wanting to let her go. And she was holding him just as tight.

“I’m sorry.” The words were spoken, truthful. Only this time, they weren’t coming from her. No, this time, they were coming from The Tall Genius. And she was pulling back.

“Sorry? Why are you sorry?”

The boy laughed, true and genuine. For once, she could see it reach his eyes. She’s always loved that about him— the fact that he was always able to smile through it all. Through all his pain, he was still able to find the happiness. “I’m at fault too, you know. One person can’t cause all of the destruction.”

“No, you’re perfect.” She believed it too.

“Trust me, I’m not perfect.” He paused, then added. “At all.”

Her hands made their way home— to the sides of his face. She noticed the way he leaned into her touch— he had missed her just as much. Maybe even more. “You’re perfect to me, Spence.”

He laughed again— music to her ears. She wished she could listen to it for the rest of her life. So, she said, “Don’t ever let me go, okay?”

He nodded, suddenly serious, “We’ll get this guy, and then I’ll never let you go again. Not until the day I die.”

And like she had wanted to since she had seen him earlier in the day, she pulled him to her. A kiss shared between them wouldn’t fix everything, but it sure was a start (and that’s all that mattered). “Not even then.”

A dazed look in his eyes. The same one he had after every shared kiss and every time she said she loved him. Though mind far off, he nodded and agreed, “Not even then.”

Then he kissed his girl again— like his life depended on it.

Because, even after all these years, it probably did.

#spencer reid #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #spencer reid x reader #spencer x reader #matthew gray gubler #mgg #dr spencer reid

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jae-daddy · 4 years

Text

Duff (4)

jaebum au series

one / two / three / four / five / six / seven / eight masterlist

pairing: im jaebum x reader genre: angst, smut, cheating, CEO! i guess too now plot: you are the duff, and guys use you to get close to your bestfriend, turns out jaebum was no exception. but as time goes on the tension between you and your bestfriend’s unoffical boyfriend grows a/n: it so late, I'm literally seeing double rn... hope y’all like it! <3 not edited.

Life is brimming with lessons that teach you how to live without being naive and a fool.

You were already taught a few lessons by life, as it made you jump through endless hoops burning with malicious flames waiting to scorch your skin at slightest touch.

So you found it fair to hold yourself as intelligent and mature.

Therefore, you trusted your conclusion to ignore whatever happened in the elevator with Im Jaebum.

What was said, what was done; none of it mattered.

An important lesson you’ve learnt is people say and do crazy things when they are riding high a shot of adrenaline.

Jaebum’s near-death experience led him to say things that he would not on a normal day. It was only because he was scared that he did. And everyone wants to die an honest man. You were certain if it were Paul in the elevator instead of you, Jaebum might have confessed something outrageous to him too.

So that was not the reason why you were staring at the two males in front of you as they spoke absolute nonsense to you. You already knew not to take what happened in that tiny metal box seriously. Instead, it was another life lesson you knew that made you stare at them as if they had grown two heads: everything has a price.

“Not everyone gets an opportunity like this, y/n,” Paul spoke, a second away from begging on his knees.

You shook your head in distaste, this was not part of the plan. Actually, there was no plan, but if you had one, this would definitely not be it. This was not how you imagined your lottery internship to turn out.

“Paul, I am flattered the company believes me to be capable of such an important role,” you breathed, trying to keep a polite smile as your eyes bounced between the bald man and the smirking jerk. “However, I do not think I would be suitable for this role. I made it clear in my internship contract that I will not have my studies affected by this opportunity. Unfortunately, being the secretary of the -”

“I’m sorry to stop you, y/n,” Paul cut you off, not apologetic at all. You bit your cheeks to hold back a sneer. “We have thought about this through, and believe it to be the best plan of action to take right now. Mr Im is new to this company and is temporary, and while we have made a public announcement, he is still on trial.

“We could get someone in a fixed-term confidential contract, but that’s too complicated.”

Your brows furrowed as you disagreed with that, but you didn't say anything.

“The remaining time left in your contract and Mr Im’s trial period match up perfectly. You already have secretarially role in the company, so you already know the ups and downs, the tricks and tips, so we really believe this is the best way. And about your studies, the summer break began last week. However, if you believe this to be in violation of your contract, we will compensate.”

“Compensate?” You rose an eyebrow, payment would be better than slaving away for free.

“Pay you, just like any other employee,” Paul smiled happily. Finally seeing some indication of interest from your side. He added, proudly, “with all employee benefits.”

You bit your lip in deep thought.

You mentally weighed the pros and cons.

There were pros, so many pros; a better resume, money, free coffee and healthcare, etc. But the con, the big con stared at you in bold, italics, highlighted in large red fonts: you’d be working for Im Jaebum.

If this was someone else you would have said yes the moment they offered it, even without the benefits. But with Im Jaebum, things got complicated.

You weren’t sure if he could maintain the professional relationship between the two of you. And if you were being completely honest, you didn’t know if you could maintain it too.

Even now, with Paul standing at one end of the table, and Jaebum settled on the long side. Your mind couldn’t help thinking about how short your skirt was, and how easy it would be for Jaebum to bend you over the wooden table, and make you a moaning mess.

It would be quite difficult to maintain professionalism when you’d be spending time alone with him. Or maybe, he would use his position to make you suffer. He might end up not coming to work at all, have you do all his work, and just show up to sign and show his face.

So much could go wrong with working for Im Jaebum.

And you also had to consider the fact that you hadn’t talked to him since the elevator incident.

You haven’t been to Heather’s place, too busy with the piled up assignments all due within the last two weeks. The twenty hours of weekly internship didn’t give you any freed up time either. You didn’t get an opportunity to see Heather, or her boyfriend, Im Jaebum, to have a talk.

“Oh come on, y/n,” Jaebum smiled at you, making your blood boil instantly. This was the first thing he said to you in the past two weeks and somehow managed to be an arrogant shit-eater when he did. Your glare didn’t make his smile falter as he sang, “It’ll be fun.”

No way. You thought. There is no way you would be able to work for that self-centred, cocky, incredibly hot jerk.

“We’ll cover your fees.” Paul stopped you before the no on the tip of your tongue tumbled out. You stared at him in shock, as he looked at you expectedly.

“My university fees?” You asked, shocked.

“Yes, all of it.” He nodded.

That’s a lot.

Your eyes fell on Jaebum who smirked at you as if he had the whole entire world at his feet's disposal, and maybe he truly did. He had something similar to that power if the company was willing to go to such extents to make him stay.

The pros were really starting to outweigh the annoying, irritating con.

“Fine,” you licked your lips, with a sigh. “I’m in.”

Paul almost jumped in his place with excitement, “Thank you, y/n! Thank you so much!”

Paul walked out swiftly muttering something about going to the HR and having a contract formed immediately. Your eyes followed him as he left, remaining on the doors that closed behind him.

You could feel his gaze burning the side of your face, and it truly felt as if you were about to combust.

“What?” You snarked, turning towards him annoyed.

Jaebum just snickered as he swirled side to side, carefree, on his chair, “Why are you always so mad, love?”

You rolled your eyes getting up, “I guess this meeting is over.”

“I didn’t dismiss you, y/n,” Jaebum said, stopping his playful actions.

“You’re not my boss until I sign that piece of paper, so,” you gave him a middle finger with a tight smile before walking out the office.

You could hear his light laughter follow you, but you ignored it.

You stopped in your tracks as you remembered something and entered the room once again. Jaebum looked up at you, surprised, before smiling brightly, “Welcome back.”

You cursed yourself for returning after such an amazing exit, but there were more pressing matters than your pride.

“Have you told Heather about what happened?” You closed the door behind you, making sure no one could hear you.

Jaebum’s eyes danced with amusement, as he shrugged, drawling, “What happened?”

“In the elevator, Jaebum,” you gritted through your teeth as you stepped closer towards him.

Jaebum’s smiled only grew as he frowned with feigned innocence, “I can’t seem to remember, maybe if you could help me remember.”

His lazy gaze fell to your lips before meeting your eyes again. A spark ignited deep inside you, and you told yourself it was anger; it was an annoyance.

You clicked your jaw as you smacked your hands onto the desk, leaning over it. Jaebum watched you, carefully, not intimidated a bit, only amused.

Your eyes narrowed at him, before you smiled sweetly, “You were holding my hand and crying like a child.”

Jaebum hissed, unaffected, as he tsked, “I can’t seem to remember that.”

“Did you tell her or not?” You groaned, your annoyance at peak.

What you would do to this man if you got a chance. He wouldn’t be smiling like that, he’d be begging you for forgiveness, for release.

Jaebum smirked as if he could read your mind, “No, I didn't.”

“Good,” you nodded, gulping as his eyes watched you with unsettling darkness. “Don’t.”

He rose his eyebrow, before nodding, “As you wish, y/n.”

You turned and felt his gaze watch you as you walked out. You felt it lower, watching your hips as it swayed side to side. Your hand gripped the cool handle as your shoulders sagged slightly.

You let out a low sigh, “Thanks.”

You disappeared behind the door before Jaebum could reply.

“Babe!” Heather sang as her long limbs fell over you loosely. You laughed, as you helped her sit straight. She leaned against you again, snuggling her face into your neck as she hugged you, “I love the way you smell, baby!”

You chuckled as you patted her red matted hair soiled with glitter and sweat at the back of the Uber, “Thanks Heather, I like how you smell too.”

“Don’t lie,” you could hear her pout, and it only made you smile. “You always make fun of my feet.”

“But that’s only after the gym or a hike, Heather,” you told her, as you brushed the hair off her face.

Heather was completely wasted tonight.

She was already drunk by the time you walked into the club. Jaebum wasn’t anywhere to be found, and you found her with a group of her “friends” that you didn’t like.

They would always make her drink too much, give her a little white sugar, and let her waste her platinum card on those low lives.

You didn’t like the way the guys would touch her as she slumped back onto the couch unable to see straight. You didn’t like the way the girls sitting around would not help her, instead, encourage her to be worse.

You were mad when you were pulling her away from the crowd and towards the bathroom when you had found Jaebum. He had just got to the club himself but was ready to leave as soon as he saw the state Heather was in.

He sat on the other side of Heather, holding her purse, as Heather held you from the middle seat.

Heather mumbled something in return and you couldn’t understand it.

“By that red letterbox is fine,” you told the Uber driver as he slowed down.

Jaebum got out first, and you helped Heather onto his back before getting out. You turned to the driver, giving him a small smile, “Thank you.”

“No problem, have a good night,” he said, already accepting a new ride.

“You too,” you said, as you closed the door. You turned to Jaebum, with Heather hanging her head over his shoulder. Her long ember curls falling down his chest as he grunted and halted her up.

“Woah, stop,” Heather moaned, heaving.

Jaebum looked at you with terror in his eyes, and you laughed at him, “Come on, let’s get this party animal into bed.”

“Is this where you live?” Jaebum asked as you led him up the small walk to the door.

You snorted and shook your head, “No, this is Heather’s home.”

Jaebum rose his eyebrows, and you continued, as you unlocked the doors,

“Her parents don’t live in this house anymore, so Heather skips between here and the apartment.”

You turned the lights on and took in the home that greeted you.

“They love sure love red, huh?” Jaebum commented, taking in the red couch, red feature wall, and red details spread over the living room and kitchen.

You laughed at that, agreeing with him. The Blacks sure did take pride in their red-haired heritage, and didn’t hide the fact that it was family’s favourite colour, “Mrs Black was going through an interior design phase.”

“Thank god it was just a phase,” Jaebum snickered, making you turn to him with a pointed look as you tried to hide the smile.

“She wasn’t too bad,” you replied and began walking towards Heather’s room.

Jaebum followed behind you, grunting as he adjusted Heather on his back, “No, she was just too red.”

You rolled your eyes as you opened her bedroom door and walked towards the bed. You pulled down the covers and Jaebum gently set her down. You took off her shoes, and earrings carefully.

Jaebum didn’t say anything and just watched you as you walked around the room getting out her nightshirt, and face-cleansing products.

“Why are you looking at me, Jaebum?” You asked, not looking at him. Instead, you pumped out the cleanser on a pad and gently took off the makeup from her face.

“Is there a problem?” Jaebum asked back, making you snort.

You gently turned her face and began the other side, “Yes, it’s making me nervous. I can feel you judging me.”

He was probably thinking what everyone else seemed to think when they saw you and Heather. They never saw the whole you both had for each other, how you would do anything for one another. All they saw was Heather in all her brilliance, beauty and wealth, and you, as her second, her side-kick.

“I’m not judging you,” he replied instantly.

Something about the way he said it made you believe him. You bit your lip, as folded the dirty make-up pads and put them on the side table.

“Then what are you doing?” You took a wet towel, wiping her face. You patted it dry and misted some toner and moisturiser. You turned back and met Jaebum’s eyes that remained on you, “Why are you looking at me?”

“There’s nothing else to look at,” he simply shrugged.

You rolled your eyes and pointed to the wall covered with photos of Heather through the years. Most of them had you in them, celebrating every holiday, and some photos from random days when the sun was shining brightly.

Jaebum stared at the wall as if noticing it for the first time. He got up and slowly walked up towards it. He took in the photos for a while, a small chuckle leaving him sometimes, “How did you two become friends?”

You smiled at the memory, “She saved me.”

You stared at your gorgeous friend, as she got up slightly. She searched around, her eyes disappearing as she smiled spotting you, “Oh, you’re here, y/n. I was going to the store on Wednesday.”

She trailed off, falling back into her pillow dozing off again.

“Her hangover is going to kill her tomorrow,” you turned to Jaebum with a tight smile, as you held up the nightshirt, “I’m going to change her.”

Jaebum instantly turned on his heels and walked out, closing the doors behind him.

You walked out to the smell of coffee and Jaebum sitting at the kitchen counter with two mugs in front of him. You furrowed your eyebrows as you settled on the chair in front of him, “Is this poisoned?”

Jaebum snorted rolling his eyes.

You blew the coffee before sipping it. It was still searing hot, so you placed it down on the counter, and turned towards Jaebum.

You took in his midnight hair pushed back, revealing his forehead. You didn’t know you could find someone’s forehead so sexy, but after seeing his hair down while he was at work, you had to admit it was hot. His piercings that were normally missing during office hours had returned too, a few missing.

You frowned your eyes focusing on his nose and eyebrows, “Why aren’t you wearing all your piercings?”

“It’s a nuisance putting it on and off,” Jaebum shrugged, before pointing to his lips, his tongue coming out to flick the sliver hoop, “Just wore my favourite.”

You held your breath, as the image of the cool metal against your lips, flicked by your tongue, gently tugged by your teeth invaded your mind. Your cheeks heated but you continued like nothing was happening to your body.

“Do you have piercings anywhere else?”

Jaebum smirked, “If you’re into pierced nipples, I can get them done for you.”

You groaned, a ridiculous smile on your face as you shook your head, “Can you ever have a conversation without being a prick?”

“A prick?” he gasped, “that’s a bit harsh. I would say I’m more of a flirt.”

“Oh, so you know? This is a conscious decision. You wake up every day and decide to be the bane of my existence.”

“I do wake up every morning and think of you,” Jaebum smiled at you. He chuckled, seeing you roll your eyes at him.

“You’re ridiculous,” you snorted. Jaebum simply shrugged, smiling.

Something beeped from the kitchen and Jaebum got up. You watched him walk over to the stove and turn it off. He reached for a mug before looking through the drawers for something.

You narrowed your eyes watching him, “What are you looking for?”

“Uh... a strainer?” He turned back to you, scratching the back his head. “I don’t know what it’s called.”

Your heart melted at how adorable he looked standing there, confused and unsure. The smile on his lips was so beautiful as he watched you, waiting for you.

“The second drawer over there,” you pointed, not looking at him as your cheeks tinted rosy again.

Jaebum murmured thanks, before using it to drain the liquid from the pot and into the cup, “It’s a hangover tea. My mum makes it for me every time I get too drunk.”

“You live with your mum?” You asked. Jaebum peered back at you a small smile on his lips.

“Yeah, but I rarely ever get to see her.”

“Why’s that?” You frowned. The way Jaebum talked about her, the lightness in his voice and the softness of his smile, told you how much he adored his mother.

Jaebum shrugged before giving you a cheeky smile, “My house is too big.”

You laughed at that. You were not expecting that at all. You heard Jaebum’s low chuckle as you sobered up.

“What about you?” He asked as placed the cup onto a tray with a glass of water and two tablets he found next to the refrigerator. “Do you live alone?”

“Yup,” you nodded, before frowning, “Not even a pet.”

“No pets?” He asked, sympathetic.

You nodded, “I’m scared of animals. It doesn’t matter what size, or how well-trained, or what the animal is. I am terrified of them all the same.”

Jaebum gasped as if you had confessed to a murder, “What is wrong with you?”

“Wow, I thought this was a safe place,” you mumbled before taking a sip from your coffee that had cooled down. You hummed at the taste, he made good coffee.

“What about your parents?” Jaebum asked, making you stiffen. “Where do they live?”

You remained quiet.

You opened your mouth to tell him what you always told anyone who asks. It wasn’t that you were embarrassed or thought it was something to hide. You didn’t want people in your business and telling them to mind their business when they asked only piked up their interest more.

So you opened your mouth to tell him what you’ve been telling everyone for the past five years, “I don’t live with them.”

Normally you would follow up with something about living here was better for your education or future jobs. You would say something, an excuse, that was reason enough for many young people to move out of their parents home. But what you said surprised you, “I don’t talk to them anymore.”

“Oh,” was all Jaebum said. “That’s cool too.”

You peered up at him with a frown. You took in his relaxed gaze, the smile on his face just like it there was a minute ago. There was no sympathy, no pity. There was no spike in interest or anything.

He really didn’t want to pry. He didn't want to know why unless you told him. He only took as much as you could allow him.

Suddenly there was an iridescent pond shimmering in your chest. It swirled, making your whole body feel alive as you took in Im Jaebum. It felt as if your entire body was one cell, one tiny speck of dust caught in the breeze of Im Jaebum, and it didn’t mind.

You gulped, your body and mind acting quicker than you could control, “They couldn’t stand the sight of at me after they found out I was still doing something I promised I wouldn’t do anymore.”

The faces of your parents appeared in front of your eyes. The shock, anger, the disappointment on their face as they found you lying in a pool of your urine and vomit. The horror in their eyes, their desperateness as they shook your body, pleading for you to reply.

“They didn't kick me out. I left,” you ran a hand through your hair, as you let out a heavy sigh. You thought of the letter you wrote them, the way they had cried when they came to the hospital to meet you during those months, “I couldn’t hurt them anymore.”

“Do you think you would ever go meet them again?” You looked up to Jaebum watching you. You were thankful for the lack of pity in his eyes as he kept his gaze on you.

You sighed again, and it came out as a little laugh, “One day I will.”

You nodded, as you met his eyes. He smiled at you softly, and you smiled back as you scrunched your nose to stop the tears from threatening you, “When I am good enough, I will.”

“I hope that day comes soon.”

You didn’t realise Jaebum had come this close to you as you were talking. He leaned against the counter between you, his eyes intently taking you in. He folded his hands on the dark marble, his face leaning half-way over the counter.

You watched him back.

He was so beautiful.

You huffed out a smile as you shook your head at him. Jaebum instantly changed, leaning back, the playfulness in his eyes glinting once again as he rose an eyebrow in question.

“You’re not too bad, you know?” You smiled at him, before adding, “When you’re acting like a normal human being at least.”

Jaebum laughed at that before giving you a mocking smirk, “You’re not too bad yourself, y/n.”

You grinned about to say thank you, when he added, “When you’re not acting like a stick is stuck up your ass at least.”

“What an asshole,” you shook your head, laughing at him.

Jaebum beamed back, his eyes shining, “What a bitch.”

You took in the dark flecks in his eyes. You noticed their velvety blackness absorbing all light around it, but something else existed in those captivating eyes of his eyes. They didn’t get dragged away into the twilight of his gaze.

Instead, it shone brightly. It glistened, it was golden, white and sparkled like a starry night. It dragged you in, it made you want to lean close to him.

It made you want to place your lips on his and see how that shimmering halo swirled as he pulled you in closer. It made you want to reach for him, to place your hand on his soft cheeks. It made you want to walk around the counter and hug him in the middle of the kitchen littered with red embellishments.

Jaebum’s smile curled into an easy smirk as he winked at you before turning around. He picked up the tray with a cup of tea, a glass of water and Panadol, as walked towards the door the red-haired beauty was sleeping in.

Everything had a price.

Somewhere deep within your heart was a corner buried so deeply in the darkness you had forgotten it existed. The room was cold, dark, and there was nothing. Nothing except for a lone candle standing in the middle of the emptiness.

There had been nothing there for an eternity, and it was almost like magic. It almost felt like a trick of the eye, but then it happened again.

A flame, a spark, flickering at the tip of the candle; it sparked again.

This time it caught on. It burned, slowly getting brighter and livelier.

You watched Jaebum disappear behind the door of Heather’s room.

A sharp ache twisted your heart as you saw his broad back enter the dark room she was sleeping in.

The flame spreading over the wick twisted in shades of ember, their shadows dancing over the room.

You saw a word, you saw a face.

You knew the price for this feeling tugging, craving to grow bigger in your heart. You walked into the room, hidden in a deep corner of your heart. The ivory trail of your dress dragged on the dusty floor, turning brown with every step.

You didn’t look at the walls, you didn’t take in the shapes of the flames.

You took sharp, clear steps. You reached the candle, the flame reflecting softly against you. You closed your eyes, took in a deep breath and exhaled, blowing out the candle.

The flame was gone.

The candle extinguished, the room engulfed in darkness, once again.

You looked to the wall, the photo was no longer there but the image there was burnt into your mind.

The price of this feeling was too expensive.

It was too precious, and you couldn’t afford it.

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