#even though i think it would be better to keep it to myself while i'm working on it
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hashimasims ¡ 2 days ago
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Elucea grabs the hamper in the corner and dumps it, lots of plasma packs both empty and full fall out into a pile.
Elucea: Better than when I steal Absalom's plasma packs and drink them. I don't know why I have to have them. I feel better, calmer, after drinking one or eating his leftovers though it doesn't last long before I do it again. I thought it was some lingering affects of being pregnant with Vamp children, I randomly ate plasma fruits when I was pregnant as well so I figured it would just go away eventually. Drinking Nitäl's alcohol kept me calm for days, maybe even a week before I resorted to taking the plasma packs again. Even drinking from sims while we were on vacation was better than these. I hide them in there so both of them think it's Abs' fault. I can't let them know.
Hypnos: Why not El? There's a reason for all this and I could have told you if you had said something to me about what was going on instead of hiding it. Absalom should have been the one to tell you.
Elucea: I'm not the same as I should be, the same woman they completed the Bonds with. That in and of itself shows the bonds are broken enough for them to leave. I don't think I could live through being abandoned again. I'll have to for the school or at the very least try, but it will be hard and I don't want to have to.
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Watcher's Notes: OK @abbysimsfun @changingplumbob @itmeansiris and pretty much everyone you called it but I had to try to keep you all at bay for this reveal. You were wrong about the wine at the bar though, it really was just wine, that scene was purposely written for everyone to yell out that she was drinking blood but since it was not a Vamp Bar a full glass of blood like that would DEFINITELY have been noticed by Abs since he did notice when the bartender didn't clean the cup properly here after previously being used for a Plasma drink. That scene was also written so people would scratch their heads and wonder especially when El stated the drink was made special for her.
I was also waiting for someone to call out that she was drinking a plasma pack in the background here lol though this is very hard to see with how I took the screenshot unless someone were specifically looking for something like that
↓El's point of view of a couple points during the Sulani portion of their vacation below↓
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↑ While Absalom talks to Oliana happening in the background of the last frame very hard to see (on purpose of course) You can even see her attack someone in the first frames while Abs is snorkeling that he is oblivious to
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↑These 6 photos during the conversation between Kan and Abs happening here, here, and here again if you look closely behind them in a couple shots you can see some of this happening.
I was really trying to not be super obvious with El's actions while still having them be seen but I was still anticipating someone to catch it so I don't know whether to pat myself on the back or apologize lol
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sl-walker ¡ 11 hours ago
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Boldly Reading: Watsonian vs. Doylist Reads, Death of the Author and Exploitation
I apparently couldn't help myself. I dunno yet whether I'm gonna keep that in the actual review of Issue 3 on Boldly Reading (where I apparently go into the deepest possible dives on this stuff), but I think it's an interesting enough chunk of writing and meta that I wanted to share it anyway.
Especially if any of you Boosteroos out there have any thoughts on it.
(I didn't get into the queer reading of him here, but I also believe that's another factor that does come into play. Whenever I do the inevitable writeup about that, I'll likely include this, or at least summarize it, but you can bet that it was on my mind as I worked on this.
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One of the reasons why it’s particularly interesting to view Booster (as a character) through both the Watsonian and Doylist lenses is there’s usually something intriguing about both of those and how they sometimes tie together. Or how what happens in-universe can serve as a commentary on what’s going on outside of it.
Most of the people who would end up reading these reviews of mine — which are some pretty deep dives — already know Booster’s backstory. In its earliest form, it was just: Highly promising college football hero gets greedy and decides to bet on his own games only to end up disgraced. As time went on, though, more and more interesting details got added in, most often by Dan himself, which completely change the framing of that story. The basic facts of it remain the same — Booster getting caught up in a gambling scheme and completely wrecking his own future — but the context and reasoning go from being somewhat simplistic (if unique) at the outset to some frankly brilliant character writing.
And all the more brilliant because of what it says about the creative process, in addition what layers it adds to Booster in-universe, too.
I know that very probably it wasn’t planned out in that fashion from the jump because any creative writer will tell you that stories often end up telling themselves, winging off in directions unexpected. Good characters essentially seem to write themselves. That doesn’t make the writing itself any less amazing, mind; this is still fiction, springing forth from the mind of an author, and therefore the author deserves credit for that excellence. But it does make for a fascinating look into the organic nature of character development, as well as what time can often lend to a story as it passes.
Anyone who knows me knows I’m a merciless critic when it comes to professional writers. I don’t mean cruel (and generally try not to be) and I always believe in giving credit where I feel it’s due (and try to never forget that my opinion is still only an opinion), but I’ve been in this game myself long enough to not lionize anyone. Part of that is because I firmly believe you shouldn’t ever put people on pedestals; that you should always bear in mind that these people are people, no better nor worse than you. That way, when shit like what went down with Neil Gaiman happens, you’re not devastated.
Believe me, I do have a point I’m coming to with this, so you can keep reading to get to it, or you can skip to the rest of the review.
So back on the train — crazy or not — I sometimes try to take into account the author’s life (Doylist) when analyzing the character’s life (Watsonian) because the push-pull influences are neat as hell. Not always, though, because I believe there’s merit in the concept of Death of the Author; that a story’s meaning cannot simply be attributed to only the author, but also to the reader interpreting it.
Walter (owner of the legitimately comprehensive and fantastic Boosterrific) and I have discussed Dan’s writing some and our own individual interpretations, and I’ve even corresponded once with Dan himself, so my own opinion ultimately is that while Dan’s a perfectly fine writer — meaning that he can tell a competent story³, has some good ideas and you’re not likely to find yourself wincing too often — his spark of actual genius really was in the creation of Booster himself, and moreso, specifically in this volume.
In various interviews, Dan doesn’t exactly trash-talk his early work here, but he does make sure to include the caveat of how inexperienced he was and how much better he got over time. And as a writer, I can see that’s true. There’s a definite difference between early Vol. 1 and later Vol. 1. Dan’s skills improve with practice, just like the rest of us.
But again— there’s also a fundamental difference between skill and genius. His skills improved, but his genius — intentional or un — is on display in Booster himself, and how Booster interacts with the world, most evident here early on.
The evidence for this is in how Dan wrote Booster in Vol. 1 versus, say, when he took over the JLA. Dan does a better job in Vol. 1 by about three country miles. How he handles his own creation in JLA is just fundamentally bad at some points (specifically in making Booster a sexist asshole, which he never had been before); it’s almost as if he looked at how Giffen and DeMatteis wrote Booster (and well!) and then latched onto all the exact wrong things, some of which didn’t even exist prior, and pasted them over-top the lovely framework he put together himself, leaving both his writing and his character the poorer for it.
Dan might have been a more practiced and skilled writer in JLA, but I’d argue that — at least in terms of Booster as a character — he wasn’t actually a better one.
So, the point basically is:
(Doylist) Dan displayed real, shining brilliance in his creation of Booster, both initially and with the building revisions to Booster’s backstory.
(Doylist) The revisions of Booster’s backstory from ‘driven by greed’ to ‘desperately poor kid gets a taste of something better than subsistence survival and wants more’ to ‘desperately poor kid in a dire situation bets his entire future in order to save his mother and family and then gets a taste of having money and wants more’ in particular are absolutely fantastic from a character development standpoint PARTICULARLY because they’re doled out over time and actually build on each other. (Dan wasn’t the one who got to the ‘blackmailed by the mob’ part, that was Mark Waid, but that’s the one thing that brings it all together in ways that make me flail my hands.)
(Doylist) Seriously, I could write you at least 10K words on the brilliance of that psychology for storytelling purposes, and it’s made no less good because it probably wasn’t all that intentional.
(Watsonian) This also comes back to what I brought up last issue about the boy having some serious issues about vulnerability. Because once you get to the part where he got tangled up in all this trying to save his mother, in retrospect you realize that Booster himself must have given the harshest possible explanation for his behavior every time it came up prior to that. He had to have intentionally left out the parts of his story that would gain him at least sympathy from whoever was listening to it, which is polar opposite behavior from what one would expect from a young superhero looking to make it big. Booster doesn’t try to give himself a redemption arc. He basically paints himself as a villain. And that’s— incredibly damned interesting.
(Watsonian) The only reason I can see why he would do this, when it’s actually sabotaging him as a heroic figure, is because he can’t stand the idea of anyone knowing something that intimate (and likely sore) about him — meaning that he got on the path to wrecking his life because he was living in poverty and trying to save his mother — because of course they’d use it against him. This is the same dude who didn’t tell anyone his given name for at least several months in canon. Even more intriguing, it doesn’t seem to occur to Booster to invent a less lousy backstory, which is another fascinating twist of psychology. Booster’s a pretty unreliable narrator, but not for any fundamental dishonesty; whenever he lies — at least about big stuff — it seems to be mostly done in self-defense.
(Doylist AND Watsonian) The conclusion is: When you take all of these various factors in, you realize that Booster’s entire story — both backstory and in Vol. 1 here — is a hell of a tale of exploitation. And thus, the sociology (and psychology) in play.
The reason I’m saying all of that is because there are some things which are established as fact: Booster’s really fricken young here. Even in Vol. 1., Dan himself pointed out that Booster’s also pretty naïve, which certainly fits with his characterization, not only here, but also later in JLI. It dovetails neatly with those scenes I loved last issue, where Dirk is being controlling and Booster’s initial response is to try to appease and disarm the situation, and it’s only when pushed well past what most people on better footing would tolerate that he pushes back himself.
It also falls in line with the eighties in general, which was a mercenary time to be alive, at least here in the States. Reagan had dismantled a fair number of social safety nets, trickle-down bullshit was a thing, AIDS was killing people en masse, press secretaries were joking about gay plagues and everyone seemed to mostly be out for themselves.
While you can’t remove from Booster the fact that he was partially complicit in his own exploitation, you can also acknowledge that said exploitation was not only there, but a real thing: Everyone wants a piece of this kid. Everyone wants to figure out how to market him, how to make money off of him, how to manipulate him, and Booster trying to make money off of himself — which is why I said his evolving backstory is so damn genius — doesn’t actually make that any less reprehensible.
Tying it all together…! Thanks to his backstory, we know he was already primed for it, too. Because, as we find out later, everyone’s betting on him, everyone has a stake in this kid, everyone wants a piece of him. Add in that college football is rife with exploitation even today (I should know, I worked right next to a university football locker room and was heavily involved with every game), and young men are beating their bodies (and brains) to hell and back for an education or a shot at the pros, and suddenly, everything about Booster not only makes infinitely more sense, it also makes your heart ache for him.
So many of his experiences as a young adult are about his value to others as something more than as someone. Even, ostensibly, with the people who are nearest to him and should care about him as a person, with the exception of his family in his era, and Skeets and (partially, not totally, as we’ll get into later) Trixie. It’s little wonder he’s such a hot mess, one who has a deeply dysfunctional relationship with his own self-worth.
It doesn’t excuse his bad decisions, or those moments he acts like an ass and I wanna slap him silly, but it does explain them.
So, when you have people on the ground freaking out because his ‘bot got wrecked, not because it’ll hurt him but because it might either raise or ruin his earning potential, the sheer genius of how it all comes together in both the Doylist and Watsonian senses means Dan deserves a standing ovation, whether he intended to earn one or not.
And now back to your (ir)regularly scheduled review.
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3. Unlike some people. (Tom King, for the uninitiated.)
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aikoiya ¡ 2 days ago
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Well, evidently, my grandma’am is more than 50% Scottish & none of us were aware of it. Not even her! But, the surprising part is that my mom has, like, a singular percentage of Asian Indian in her. Keep in mind, we’re white white!
I mean, none of us mind it. We just weren’t expecting it, is all. 😆 Like, “Oh, hi? Welcome to the family? The dessert table’s over there, we’ll start eating at 12.”
Well, I’ve never tried almond paste, I don't think. Mostly, all I’ve had are regular almonds & a bit of almond milk. (The almond milk was BAAAD.) But I’d be willing to give almond paste a try! I used to be really picky, so I've been going outta my way to try new things for a while now. So, I’m definitely interested in giving it a try.
Update: The craziest thing just happened, not even a full week after I thought to myself, “you know what? Sure. I'd be willing to give almond paste a try!” My mother comes home from the store with almond croissants & I thought to myself, “It would be really weird if almond paste was one of the ingredients” &, sure enough, it was! I have zero idea how it was that this woman can sometimes just interface with my brain like this, because I haven't mentioned it to anyone & I don't remember her ever getting it before, so it wasn't really something I could've predicted! But, aside from the freakiest of my mother & I evidently sharing a brain cell. I can now put my money where my mouth is! I can conclusively say that I don't mind almond paste. At least so long as it's in a croissant. Even better if warmed. (Or what we in America try to pass off as croissants. I've little doubt that they're not nearly as good as what ya'll have over there.) However, I still think that I'd probably prefer chestnut past instead. But that's likely just me & my bias talking. Though, now I know that, if I happened to be passing by a breakfast table & it had a plate of warm almond croissants with almond paste filling on it, then I wouldn’t turn it down! Always nice to learn something new about myself, so thank you for bringing up the idea! Much appreciated!
Now, because of this, I feel compelled to recommend an American dessert to you. What desserts do you like? Maybe I can come up with something you'd be interested in giving a try. Heck, if it's a simple enough one, I might even be able to get you the recipe!
Anyway, aside from my new discovery, it still stinks not getting the chance to try chestnut paste or butter or cream because I love chestnuts. ): Normally, I love being an American, but then stuff like this turns up & I get a little bit jealous. But, dang. Candied chestnuts sound so good, too. And now all I can think about is how my 3 ingredient peanut butter cookies would turn out with chestnut butter instead…
Thanks! I like the idea of it too! I'm hoping to get together enough menu items to actually be able to make a single page menu & I'm pretty sure that I'm close. However, I'm having some problems with putting together a cheese selection. I really only know of 2 types of cheeses in Hyrule. Those being Hateno Cheese & Ordon Cheese. So, I've been trying to come up with some other stuff. Give it a bit of "flavor." Like, I'm not sure if it's alright to have cheeses from non-Zora towns or not considering how the main draw of this particular eatery is that its menu is made up of local cuisines. If it isn't, then I need to come up with a bunch of all-new original products. And, the thing is that the closest thing I can find to something that could act as a native dairy livestock is the numerous Water Buffalo all over the place. Which would be cool if it turned out that water buffalo milk was more common in France, when in reality, it seems to be more of an Italian thing. (Citation needed.) Regardless, I've been workshopping an abnormal amount into the dairy industry lately. 😅
Personally, I would've liked a few more parts where the Yiga came across as more threatening, like how they did regarding Dorian & when they recreate the Lightning Helm. If nothing else, it showcases that they're more formidable than they let on. And even if you don’t go with them recreating the Lightning Helm, then I’d replace it with making something similarly impressive.
You’re welcome! Credit where it’s due, right? And I guess that it does make sense.
Well, that's fair. I guess that I just found it more interesting than anything. And I thought they did explain the origins of it? You can very much see similarities between the helmets & the Zonai's architecture, as well as their constructs, even if not in their actual clothing style. Personally, I found the skydiving set to have been something I thought looked much less like something the Zonai might wear. Cool idea, but not exactly something I'd imagine them wearing.
This is partly why I go with the idea that there was some sort of cataclysm that caused the Hylians to need to restart from zero.
Well… technically the Rito have always been based on Native American culture, so other races with similar ancient American roots coming along wasn’t really too far of a stretch. And, the Zonai don’t only take inspiration from Central America, but also bits & pieces of Chinese. In fact, the symbols that are used for the Secret Stones are ancient Chinese seal script. So, even if there isn't much in the way of European connection, there is some Eurasian connection. Just not much.
Well, I know that the Hylian ruins in certain places like the Ancient Columns show a bunch of ancient Mediterranean architecture. So, my guess would be that you’d be right in thinking Greek/Roman.
So, if I were you, I’d maybe go with Skyloft, but with very early Greek/Roman influences. And by that, I mean pre-empire Greece/Rome & such. In fact! I’d recommend giving botwstoriesandsuch’s Analysis of the Ancient Columns a quick look if you want inspiration for said native Hyrulean architecture.
They theorized that the bigger ruins of this style may have actually been ancient temples to worship the fae due to how each one seems to be in very close proximity to a Great Fairy Fountain. Not only that, but I believe that it was mentioned somewhere that these ruins were from around the 10,000 year mark. It's actually very cool!
Similarly, they also brought up something I hadn't fully realized before: The Rito Trade Routes. The roads over Tabantha Bridge & passed the Maritta Exchange were most likely major trade routes & the Rito were probably part of the reason why, meaning that they might've been trademasters & possibly much more social in times past. Botwstoriesandsuch go over it probably way better than I can.
And, I'm also pretty dang sure that they legit Cracked the Code on the Zora Lifespan & Ages in a way that is easily apparent to anyone on a visible level! It's the number of luminescent dots on one side of their heads & headtails! The girls all start out with 8 dots on their head & males start out with 11. But as they age, they lose dots with each century. Oddly, they’ve yet to find a Zora with fewer than 7 dots. Either way, if you subtract the number of dots they currently have from the number they started with as fries, then you have the number of centuries they've been around for. So, atm, it appears that 300-400 years is the average Zora lifespan. At least, for the moment. However, what I found surprising is that Dorephan has 9 dots, while Sidon has 10. And doesn't that mean he's only a century older than his son, yet text tells up that he & Muzu (how has 7 dots) began working around the same age. Is it possible that the royal Zora simply have more dots naturally?
Sorry, went off-topic.
Same. Rauru's concerns definitely seem to center more around Ganondorf & less so the Gerudo as a whole.
I read that too! I found it really cool! And, yes. That's how I'm taking it. An indication of who Ganondorf could be someday. Because, I really find it interesting how Fudo showcases creation through destruction & I think that it would work very well for a Ganondorf redemption. In fact, I'm gonna be adding exactly that sort of concept to mine through things like sculpting & stonemasonry. It's such an interesting idea that you can chip off pieces of a stone, but in doing so, you can make something new.
Thank you! I really liked the idea that they'd use different words due to the difference in origins & their meanings.
Mmm… Understandable. I can get wanting the story to be able to stand on its own. Again, maybe I'm just too flexible.
That’s fair.
That's TRUE!! I suppose that it would be very interesting to learn how Hylia was before becoming Sun!
Exactly!! There's no way that the Bargainer ISN’T significant!
Yeah, but Impa's also, like, one good jump-scare away from the grave, too. At some point, it's time to pass on the responsibility to the next generation. Again, not trying to discourage, but more so point it out.
True, but to be fair, the Jabun-diving doesn't seem like something that was explicitly planned, per se. And I'm pretty sure that the reason Time needed to sleep so long was due to how he was raised in such a sheltered life. Far more so than Wind, who at least grew up around other humans, primarily a bunch of adults. Especially as an elder brother, which would naturally cause him to mature sooner. Meanwhile, Time was raised around all-but-one child.
Oh! The manga actually had an explanation for the ear piercing, though it's obviously not canon. In it, he didn't get the earrings until later, when Impa pierced them herself, saying that they were a sign that he was considered an adult among the Sheikah or something to that effect.
What I personally found more odd was how he wore white long johns as an adult.
But yeah, extra precaution is, essentially, what I’m thinking.
Technically, there’s a possible reason for why Sky had such issues with running. He lives in the sky where the air is super thin & it's probably harder to breathe. I wouldn’t be surprised if that was just typical for Skyloftians. Besides, not only does Skyloft really not have all that much land to begin with, but they're Sky Knights that fly on their Loftwings. It's actually not all that surprising to me if it turns out that it's not really an usual thing for Skyloftians to be more like Lord of the Rings Dwarves. “Natural sprinters.” Actually, if I remember correctly, I'm pretty sure that someone calculated Sky’s top speed & compared it to the other Links. Turns out that he's possibly the fastest. So, much like LotR Dwarves & even IRL cheetahs, maybe Sky's just a sprinter rather than a cross-country runner? But that's just me. I'm actually kinda worried now that I'm striking down all your thought processes. 😓 Sorry!
Well, now I'm curious as to who it is you have in mind for the other Sages. Because there really aren't that many other major non-Hylian characters that would seem to fit the roles… That was rhetorical, btw. I wanna be surprised. 😁
True. I suppose it would be a major highlight to help save Hyrule. As for beyond that, it's why I tend to give the role of Sage a little splash of DnD Cleric.
True, but I'd argue that the Goddesses might've decided, “Yeah, this isn't working. The next ones need a bit more beef to them or they'll just drop like the others.” Actually, OoT's Impa, Zelda, & Nabooru were technically fighters. Though, while I understand what you mean, you might be leaning a little too much on what's been done in the past & not enough on trying new things. Because, while tradition is important, there should still be room for new concepts or things begin to stagnate. I think that the problem with the old Sages is that they essentially become the typical damsels/dons in distress & I think that a number of fans have begun to find that a bit irritating. Which may have been the initial reasoning behind making certain characters take more initiative. It makes it seem more like the story is something that's happening with them rather than just to them.
Maybe, I dunno. I'm just throwing out ideas at this point.
Well, remember that Sidon, Yunobo, Teba, & Riju weren't actually the Champions last game. And at least Sidon & Riju had very good reasons to be involved due to being either the next Zora King & the late Champion's sister or the current Gerudo Chief. Likewise, the role of Sage is typically passed down through the bloodline, isn't it? And even if this is a different timeline, wouldn't it still work the same way? For that matter, there's the question of why those characters were chosen as Sages in OoT to begin with. Who was it that THEY inherited it from?
Furthermore, what are you going to do with Riju & Sidon when it's time to go through the temples in the Gerudo & Zora regions? Again, they're the people in charge in those areas. Not only that, they’ve already shown themselves to be the active sort & not the types to just sit around & let others do things for them. And it'd be very out-of-character for them to suddenly become as such without a good reason.
Besides, it was also sort of tradition to have either the leaders or the next leaders of each race be the Sages in the case where there were leaders.
And even if it wasn't the same Ruto, we know that both Mipha & Sidon are descendants of A Princess Ruto. As such, if not Sidon for the Sage of Water, then who? Maybe Dorephan? Or someone not related? Bazz?
This is rhetorical. I’m just talking.
Like, we really didn't actually focus that much on the descendants in BotW, but rather the Champions & their relationships with the new generation. But in TotK, it felt more like we were actually focusing on Sidon, Riju, & Yunobo as individuals, their relationships with other characters, their goals, & their motivations. So, I guess that I just kinda feel bad for them?
Again, don't answer! I wanna read it myself! This is mostly just me making conversation & stuff!
Well, Link doesn’t have the Rauru arm, so it wouldn’t really have the same narrative impact for Link to inherit the Sage’s powers here. Similarly, the vow scenes also wouldn't really have the same symbolic nuance as they did in TotK if the Sages aren't the same ones from TotK. So, even if Link did inherit their powers, you'd also need to change how all-but Tulin would give said powers to him to more encompass their individual relationships with Link.
Besides, the reason he got the Champions’ abilities last game was because they were ghosts, so I guess that I sorta figured that they were kinda chilling out with him. We don’t have that this time.
Yep! And Cadence Link is OoT Link's father! Which is why him dying in the civil war was such a tragedy! Had he lived, then HE would've taken the role of the Hero of Time or, at the very least, would've accompanied Time on his journey & been the one to prepare him. But because he died, he was unable & Time went through so much with very little support! I had a bunch of fun thinking this stuff up.
Exactly! That's my perspective, too! But, what you intend & what happens are not the same thing! It's an escalation! Imagine a kid chasing a butterfly & he catches it with his hands. But then when he opens his hands to look at it, he finds that he killed it by accident. He never intended to kill the butterfly, just to have it & play with it. But sometimes, we want something so much that, if we're not careful, then in our pursuit of it, we end up destroying the very thing that we wanted. And that's, in many ways, what Ganondorf has done.
Because Ganondorf is human. And even if there are a lot of really hateful humans out there, in the end, we are still capable of more than just hatred specifically due to how our bodies work. However, we know basically nothing about how Hyrule's demons work, but if Demise really was nothing but hate personified, then Ganondorf simply being human should free him up as far as characterization, whereas Demise was very limited. By making him human, he's now more than what Demise was. Being a demon limited Demise, but Ganondorf being human frees him of those limitations.
I'm talking about living & experiences. We already had WW Ganondorf, who showed melancholy & regret. But we also have TotK Ganondorf & even though he himself didn't show much outwardly as far as characterization, we do know that he cared about Kōme & Kotake due to their names being on his weapons the same way that they were on WW Ganondorf's dual swords.
Ganondorf is capable of caring about others. If he were truly & completely nothing but Demise's hatred, then these things wouldn't exist.
I guess, think of it as hatred being Demise's entire being, while hatred is only a single facet of who the Ganondorfs are/were. Even if that single facet of him happens to also be Demise's hatred. Because of that, even if Ganondorf is influenced by Demise's hatred, it would only be one part of Ganondorf's whole. So, maybe a way to compare it is that Demise's hate is kind of like his shoulder demon? Have you ever watched any old American cartoons where a character has a shoulder angel & a shoulder demon? It'd essentially be like that. Demise's hatred can't exactly control him, but it can convince him to do something.
Then you take into account the fact that, oftentimes, anger & hatred's true identity is ultimately pain & sorrow. For most people, anger is just a mask to hide the hurt or the fear or any number of other feelings. Just like how beneath ego is insecurity. And it’s because of this, when I see Ganondorf, I see someone with a deep-seated insecurity & inherent need to prove himself. I see a man who waltzed into the Sacred Realm believing that he was about to have all his dreams come true, only to be rejected by the full Triforce. How could his ego possibly NOT have been crushed by that turn of events? In fact, I think that him going “mad with power” was really only part of the equation. I think that the reason that power went to his head was because of how the other 2 pieces of the Triforce rejected him. Think about it. The dude was worshipped all his life. He was a cocky son of a b!t@h.
See? It would’ve been so easy to make it seem less problematic. So, I just can't help but think that Nintendo was going this route on purpose. Possibly experimenting with more serious concepts. I also would've liked seeing the vai interacting with their fathers & sending letters more because it'd feel less like the Gerudo were monocultural to a fault & actually had some form of connection to the world outside of the town.
Though, I also found another possible way to go about making the situation feel less weird to me if it goes alongside the letters thing. The law is specifically that voe aren't allowed in Gerudo Town & that young vai aren't allowed to associate with voe. And voe are specifically men, right? Well, boys aren’t men. Not yet, anyway. And I know that this may seem like a bizarre specification given the subject matter, but consider this, not every vai is going to marry a childless voe. Sometimes they might fall for widowers or divorcees with sons. Or rather than a widower, perhaps her husband has a nephew who her vehvi grows to be best friends with. Or on her journey, a vai might find a baby boy abandoned far away &, in trying to locate a home for him, she gets attached & can no longer bear to let him go.
In such situations, wouldn't an intelligent vai rule-lawyer around the law, so as to allow these adored boys (so long as they were below the age of 16-18) to visit Gerudo Town?
And, in a situation where Kara Kara Bazaar grew into a full market town where husbands & sons were allowed to live & work, wouldn't it make for a wonderful way to allow for the Gerudo to be able to maintain their unique culture while also giving the vehvi the chance to gain real world experience with boys in non-romantic situations?
But, that's just a thought I had.
A warning, Mars Meets Moms is probably a weird movie. It didn't have the best reviews. However, I'd it's really that bad, then I do still think that it had some serious potential for something thought-provoking had they executed it well.
My guess is that the Gerudo do, but that they still inevitably see him as “other.” I think that one of them call him, “a special voe.” Or “the voe who was given permission by the chief” or something? So, I think they're aware that the chief vouches for him.
Exactly!! It's exactly like that! I loved the Batreaux thing! But, again. It's actually the reverse of the situation with on'nen. Whereas hate corrupts, gratitude purifies. Which is supported by the stuff we see in the Ancient Cistern!
Sounds about right & I think it gives the world of Hyrule its own degree of uniqueness to it. And, I actually have my own theory regarding the origin of monsters. Most of the monsters we see in the Zelda series have been essentially made of black magic. However, in my version or things, there are 2 types: ones that are entirely made of magic & ones that are organic, but are strengthened by magic.
The organic ones are living monsters that were either born of other organic monsters or had once been non-monster & then were corrupted into monsters. (Think Wolfos. Their uncorrupted forms would be that of simple wolves.) These monsters, when they die, leave physical bodies behind which can be harvested much like any animal. (Please, ignore how the animals also just puff away into smoke here. 😅)
The non-organic monsters are made almost entirely of magic & either manifested as such from coelesed on'nen or had once been organic & had died, then resurrected. One example being the red moon scenes. In the case of non-organic monsters, they can only leave behind actual body parts if they had once been organic. It's why they puff away & only leave behind hooves or nails or horns. (Though, they can still leave behind things like necklaces & such.) Because that was all that was left of their physical body. And it’s also why it’s not a good idea to eat the monster meat you find in BotW & TotK. Because the little meat you manage to get from them is probably all manky & rotten & gross.
In actuality, organic monsters are far & above more powerful than non-organic monsters.
And, similarly, I wouldn’t be surprised if the meat of organic monsters were actually edible.
But, again, I seem to have gone off on another tangent.
Fair. It would be really cool to learn more about that. Though, to be fair, Ghirahim seems to essentially just be a powerful tsukumogami no ken. If so, then it would make sense why he’d follow Demise so ardently. He’s not actually a demon. He’s the same sort of entity as Fi, just one made for a demon. In a way, you could say that the difference between Ghirahim & Fi is much like the difference between the swords made by Muramasa & Masamune. Both of which were blacksmiths of ancient Japan, but it's thought that swords inherited a bit of their creator's “spirit.” Similarly, they would also take on influences from their wielders & even the gods, but the gods part is going more into the theological side of things.
Anyway, it's believed that Masamune made swords that were seen as holy & were seen as not only tools of death, but also possessed a moral & even spiritual quality to them, while Muramasa made blades that were exceptionally sharp & efficient in battle, but had a dark, violent, bloodthirsty reputation about them. Often being referred to as cursed. While his swords are masterfully-crafted, legend goes that a monk said they “yearn to cut everything indiscriminately.”
And it's thought that these attributes are reflections of the creators themselves. So, I just can't help but see an obvious parallel between this & the SS's 2 Sword Spirits.
So, this plus whatever influence he gets from Demise as his own, might be why Ghirahim is the way he is.
Not only that, but it's also because of this that I actually think that there's more to even Demise than his hatred. Because, think about it. If a part of Ghirahim is also an echo of Demise, then what does the way that Demise treated Ghirahim say about Demise's possible perception of himself?
Really? Because I like to I use it to show that while the royal family are guilty of many things, including keeping Ganondorf's followers in the Arbiter's Grounds, they at the very least weren't guilty of literal genocide.
Thank you! I got really into trying to figure out which Heroine was associated with which symbol & all that for a while. I'm also in the process of trying (& possibly failing) to create a bit of a map for Ealiyah. I'm turning Meadela's Mantle into a bit of a farming district. However, that also means that I'm essentially going to be making a road from Ealiyah itself down to the Mantle & have a big staircase carved into the side of the cliff there along with a low-tech lift for bringing produce up that way. It's been interesting figuring out the mechanics for how a society would actually work up there. I have also been planning to make an actual road leading down from the Highlands into the Gerudo Canyon. Possibly through the Voe Petrapolis I've been thinking about building along the canyon walls. It would make for an easy place to do so & would allow me to actually come up with ideas for it. I definitely need one as I'm having the Ealiyans trade often with Kara Kara & Gerudo Town, so there will most definitely need to be an easy route down.
I'd think so & it's definitely what I'm going with for my version of TotK Ganondorf. (He’s actually the youngest child of an Ealiyan Gerudo & a Hebran man. He was kidnapped by Kōme & Kotake when he was, like 3 years old when they invaded his home in the middle of the night & killed his parents! He also has a big sister who was at a sleepover with a friend at that time &, thus, survived.) I mean, there'd have to be, unless… It's possible that (canonically speaking) he may have been the son of a Gerudo vai & the previous Gerudo king? Maybe in such an instance, they don’t take on the distinct point that the more modern Gerudo have inherited from the Hylian side of the family? I mean, we know that they didn’t originally have pointed ears, so perhaps having both Gerudo parents causes something similar to atavism, thereby reaserting more Gerudo traits? If so, that could be a part of the reason why Gerudo Voe are so important. They’re a piece of the puzzle that allows the Gerudo to maintain their genetic identity as a race.
Hmm… 🤔
True. *sigh* I don't think we'll agree on this. I'll concede that maybe I’m thinking too deeply about this.
Eh, but I’d argue that you’re thinking of modern times. This is a medieval fantasy where their numbers are probably still recovering. Only the gentry or trash humans are liable to be the sort to do this sort of thing & most non-Gerudo during the times when we see the Gerudo are just normal people.
Well, it’s also possible that the Gerudo find themselves being jealous of nuclear families. “The grass is always greener” & all that. But I do see what you mean. Though, even in a situation where the Gerudo do go the route of just not marrying, I can still guarantee that problems will eventually come about because of it.
So, I think it might be important to take into account what not being allowed to associate with their own children would mean for these specific men & the societies they were raised in.
For instance, there were even some IRL cultures where abandoning one’s children would be considered unthinkable. “Grandchildren are a crown to the aged & the glory of children is their fathers.” Heck, the word for an individual’s child in Sanskrit is putra, which comes from the roots “Put” (the name of a very specific hell where it was believed that the childless went to in death) & “Tra” (to preserve). So, Putra literally means “one who saves another from hell.” (Which is something I literally only learned last night when a mutual asked me to help them find the right word for something very sad.)
And, in my au, Gerudo vai from Gerudo Town generally realize that it very much isn’t a good idea to look for a Hebran (human, not Rito) husband even though they are technically the ideal sort of match for the Gerudo. (Some being taller than them like how Rhoam was taller than Urbosa. And because of this, I made him be from Hebra. His proper name here is Rhioamdhr, which is from the Norse name Riodhr meaning “Dwells in the clearing in the forest. I thought it was fitting. X3) The reason being that parenthood is considered a sacred duty in Hebran culture. And this goes for both motherhood & fatherhood, so for a Hebran, it would be unthinkable & even a fatal blow to their pride to not be able to so much as say that their children are at least being raised by someone they trust. Let alone not so much as be involved. Even in situations where the father of a Hebran child had died, a father figure is considered essential to the development of all children: boy or girl. Yet, at the same time, if that child has a stepfather or grandfather or a male mentor or any sort of adult male whom they can look to in order to guide them in the fashion that a father would, then that child is considered “fathered.” So, it isn't simply about biology/ownership, it's about the role & the responsibility of guidance & teaching that comes with it.
As such, in my world, the only Hebrans who would consider laying with a desert Gerudo would be ones that most other Hebrans would be insulted being compared to.
And, depending on how much influence the Sheikah have from the Japanese, there very well could be clashes between them & the Gerudo just due to how the Japanese tend to deal with custody.
And, I just looked back, it's a law. It's a law that the Gerudo can't “associate” with men until they come of age:
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Specifically, they have to leave once they start becoming “more aware of the world around them.” At least, that’s how it was put in the English version.
So, yeah! That’s… Ugh… It's just really frustrating.
Anyway, back on topic. See, in Japan, if a child is orphaned, then if a biological relative wants them, then the law allows that relative to raise the child. No questions asked. It doesn't matter if the child had already been officially adopted. It doesn't matter if they had a stepparent who'd been lawfully married to one of the parents & had officially adopted that child. It doesn't even matter if the relative is a known abuser or gambler or alcoholic. They get precedence over anyone else.
So, in a situation where the Sheikah had a similar, if much less extreme, law, then if a Gerudo vai & a Sheikah man had a child together. Or even if a Gerudo vai was the daughter of a Sheikah man who had a sister, then if the Gerudo mother died & she had no other living Gerudo relatives; then, if the Sheikah relatives of her child learned of this, they could very easily say that it was Their Right, by the Sheikah's own laws, that they be allowed to raise that child. At that point, the question goes from, this isn't ideal for the Gerudo, & becomes a question of “whose law do they break: the Gerudo's or the Sheikah's & are they willing to deal with the consequences that may arise if they break the Sheikah's laws?”
And, honestly, I really wouldn't be surprised if there were similar laws in place within other human cultures. Especially outside of Hyrule.
Like, this is a lot more complicated than you might think & if the Gerudo aren’t careful, they may find themselves making enemies with the wrong sort of people.
And, mmm… There’s a difference between just growing up without a father & growing up without any male contact at all, though. Even if they don’t need men as much as IRL women do, I still think that it’s likely very bad for them on a socialization level. Which, I know is supposed to be the point of the Voe & You Class, but it just feels a bit convoluted & ultimately detrimental to the overall welfare of their society; all for the sake of creating a “unique culture.”
Maybe, but I’d honestly argue that that’s actually a pretty ignorant & misandristic take. Especially for it to be the general consensus of the Gerudo as a whole at the time. I'm also pretty sure that she actually said, “I used to think that all men, besides the great Ganondorf, were useless… but now that I've seen you, I don't think so anymore!”
And when to take that into account, it actually even becomes borderline racist when you consider that “besides Ganondorf” legitimately equates to “not a Gerudo.”
And what if the semester were switched? What if it were a race of all men who only got 1 woman every 100 years & one of those dudes literally said, “I used to think that all women, besides the Great Ganondora, were useless.. but now that I've seen you, I don't think so anymore!” Dude would be counted as an incel.
As for genetic diseases. You're right, but it's nice to at least be aware of said genetic diseases. Like, evidently, there's a higher than average tendency in my dad's side of the family towards cancer, but my dad didn't know that for the longest time because he was put up for adoption.
Now, I can’t help but think of a situation where a Gerudo had a drunken one-night stand with some random dude, then had a daughter. We already know that the Gerudo likely has a strong drinking culture & they even have a saying that “if a voe buys a vai 2 Noble Pursuits, then they’re meant to be.” So, it’s actually very possible.
Heck, I'm pretty sure that Nali is a one-night stand baby. (Not that that’s something that anyone should be shamed for. It just comes with more risks, I think.) So, hypothetically speaking, what if her father's family had a history of, like, heart disease, but because her mother didn't bother to learn anything about him, it's entirely possible that on her journey to find a male to give her a vehvi, she may end up having a heart attack out of nowhere & just fall over dead. And it would be entirely possible that neither she nor anyone she might've been traveling with would realize what was happening. (Bear with me, I am aware that this is a bit of an exaggeration.)
Regardless, at least if her mother had learned more about the man she slept with, she'd be aware of the possibility & could've taken precautions in an attempt to prevent it.
So, to me, if nothing else, I feel as though the vehvi at least have the right to such information. (Again, this is an exaggerates hypothetical, so bear that in mind, please.)
Actually, now that I think about it… This may be another part of why I have such an issue with the whole keeping kids from their fathers thing. Bad memories…
Of course, it also doesn’t help that they make the little girls sleep outside in the desert at night with only those tiny little outfits & no blankets. Like, dude, the buildings in Gerudo Town are specifically built to keep warmth in, BUT ONLY IF YOU’RE INSIDE THE ACTUAL BUILDINGS!! If they’re going to force those kids to leave their homes & families by making it a flipping law, the least they can do is make sure they have actual rooms to sleep in!
In fact, I think I might just have a bunch of different traumas that get irritated by this thing with the Gerudo. If so, it's possible that it's getting tangled up in all of it & I'm thinking irrationally because of it… If that is the case, then my apologies for it.
Also, I guess that just making men unnecessary beyond reproduction sort of removes a lot of the moral complexity from the situation. At least, for me. And the moral complexity is a part of why I find them interesting.
As for the female partners thing. I'd actually argue differently. Like, I’d be more inclined to think they'd see no real point in any romance at all because why would they? It isn't like romantic or sexual relationships were ever necessary. And I think that at least 97% would, instead, be much more career-focused.
Oh! That’s so cool! I am jealous! I suppose it would get pretty aggravating to be constantly mixed up all the time. On the other hand, having an identical twin would also be very convenient for the purposes of playing harmless pranks. XD
Hey, if I’m getting irritating or the like, then please just say so. It’d be awful if I were & didn’t know.
@aikoiya The post was getting long again so here's a new one!
I knew you were going to answer that saying "this is unfair" isn't real life logic haha (and I agree that life hasn't been fair to Sky and Sun anyway). It's just that such an ending would probably leave me feeling unsatisfied and even a bit robbed, and I think it would require a lot of other changes to be made to the story in order for it to work properly. But anyway you're right, as things are now this would just be happening behind the scenes so what I'm saying doesn't really make sense. But just thinking about it changes my perception of SS in a way I don't really enjoy, so it's not a theory I favor.
Yes in that setting I'm pretty sure that the other Sun would not make herself known to Link and Zelda and would let them have their happy ending. But I think Zelda would likely suspect her existence and know that something is wrong. I guess even Link could notice that the Temple's doors are suddenly open and would ask Impa a few questions.
I had no idea Tingle called Farore the Goddess of Wind in WW, so I went on a little quest to see if I could find the same quote in the French version of the game. Apparently it's in Tingle's description of Outset Island and I never had the chance to play with the Tingle Tuner mode. I can't find the same quote in French anywhere and I don't even know if this was included in the HD remake (I guess I'll have to wait for a Switch version to find out… if they ever release one). This has me wondering if this quote isn't something exclusive to the English version, but I can't be sure and I'd like to know what the original Japanese text says. The French wikis mention that Farore is the Goddess of Wind in WW but don't provide any quote, it just looks like the pages were translated from English but that they couldn't find the same quote in French. It's really frustrating!!
Anyway that's a bit weird because WW already establishes Zephos as the God of Wind, and he seems to be a minor deity compared to Farore. The way I see it, wind is just the element that Farore tends to be associated with, and since a lot of myths might have been lost with Hyrule in WW this could just be a mistake on Tingle's part. I mean this is the game that gave us the Golden Triumph Forks haha.
I'm not limiting Nayru/the Golden Goddesses to a singular domain, quite the opposite ^^ To me Nayru being the Goddess of Wisdom includes different concepts such as order, law, science, magic, etc., and even time (since she's introduced as the creator of the world's fondamental laws), while calling her the Goddess of Time doesn't include all of that. That's why I wrote that I found it a bit restrictive. But sure she could have both titles, the same way Farore could be known most commonly as the Goddess of Courage and also called the Goddess of Wind in some situations.
Oh I didn't think of the blocks from OoT! I would say though that they don't really use any time powers, they're just random blocks that appear or disappear for some reason when Link plays the Song of Time (it's just as absurd as playing the Song of Storms to open holes in the ground haha). But yes they were blue and associated with time, and of course Nayru is too. The difference with Hylia in my theory is that Nayru created the rules of time (if that makes sense) among other fundamental laws, while Hylia's power specifically allows her to manipulate time and foresee the future. In a way I see Hylia as Nayru's spiritual daughter who inherited some of her powers over time (and that's why the color purple she's represented with is very close to blue).
The Master Sword has also been depicted as either blue or purple though, so that asks the question of the true color of all of these things! Nayru is definitely linked to time so it makes sense that the timeshift stones are in Lanayru (and Hylia also doesn't have a province named after her).
"From the edge of time" could definitely just be a poetic way to say that Hylia kind of recorded a message for Link before dying haha. But I find it interesting that she would phrase it like that, I like to see it as a clue.
Well if Zelda simply sent Link to a point further back in time, wouldn't there be two Links existing at the same time in the Child Timeline? But sure Zelda creating a brand new timeline also raises a few questions that kind of... make my head hurt. I'm not sure what happens exactly, I've always wondered! All we know is that Link finds himself in the Master Sword's chamber with the Door of Time already open, which hints at things happening in a different way this time (because he definitely doesn't have the three spiritual stones and the Ocarina of Time yet since this is before Ganon's coup, and the ending seems to imply that this timeline's Zelda doesn't know him yet). That's why I believe Zelda might have done something a bit more complex than sending him to a point further back in time, but there's no way to be sure. The Triforce of Courage is also visible on Link's hand during the ending, and we also know thanks to TP that the Triforce is still separated in the Child Timeline despite Link and Zelda preventing Ganon from entering the Sacred Realm this time. So maybe Zelda isn't able to change everything? It's complicated haha.
Anyway, whether OoT Zelda creates a new timeline or just sends Link further back in time, that's still huge time powers and that's not something Link is able to do by playing Zelda's Lullaby.
I also believe it is more likely that Talon inherited the ranch. True, Talon might not always have been so lazy, but maybe if that was the case the game could have hinted at hit. All we know is that he leaves his daughter alone with Ingo and only comes back after Link deals with the situation, which does not make him look so great. And he only promises to work harder after that.
I'm kind of bad with names so I'm impressed you're going through all of that trouble to rename the settlements!!
I haven't gotten to developping the technology that much yet, but I'm really interested in seeing what the different races could do with it! I love the idea of using the Sheikah to infiltrate the Yiga bases. I wish TotK had done something like that and shown the Sheikah helping Link that way.
Same, I was so excited when I heard about these pirates… and then so disappointed to find nothing more than a bunch of bokos with no backstory.
Vignoble is not related to noble (though I kind of make the association in my mind, especially since vignobles are sometimes called châteaux).
Yes I thought you could maybe use clos! Aquaticlos is funny, it can work! Though maybe you could use the same logic as for the raisins (I love this Raisins de Terre idea by the way, it makes sense!) and say that what the Zoras call a clos already refers to something that's underwater, since that's probably the case for most of what they cultivate.
I don't mind helping you with French, I'm glad to do so! You put so much effort and thought into this, it's really interesting.
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chiarrara ¡ 2 months ago
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who up happying they new year rn
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milfbrainrot ¡ 3 months ago
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i feel like i type so much more than is reasonable when i do talk to people but i also don't get to socialize a ton so i just have soooo many words in me and if i'm like, tired or short on time, it is so much harder to restrain to the already-pushing-it point i can sometimes manage ;-;
#txt#i am used to posting long things that are essentially a conversation with myself because i either don't#want to bother others with certain topics or i just am used to anything i have to say really being... worth saying...#so i will sometimes go back and add more tags because i'm still thinking about it after the fact and the gap in time where someone#would have said something to prompt further thought is just. me continuing it with myself. bc i'm still thinking about it.#and then that translates into how i talk to other people where i sometimes feel like i either have too much to say without only#keeping what's of utmost relevant importance#(which is also due to me knowing if i don't say it Right Now Immediately i will forget if it does become relevant again)#so i am expecting people to read too much#and/or i then am not... listening to people? or i come off like im not listening to people?#even though i rly do try to be attentive i just forget sometimes to leave space for other people to talk because i am#used to only talking to myself so much lmaoo so i think i come off like i only want to Talk At people due to how Much i share#and sometimes i probably am not as attentive in convos as i would like to be but i try to be! i just dont know if the balance is there#but i also don't rly know how to be more concise bc of that mix of not wanting to forget and also not wanting to be misunderstood#and being so excited to get contribute etc#anyway there are also a lot of social things i HAVE been neglecting by accident i am so sorry if youve sent me an ask etc#and you've gotten silence i am getting to things slowly ;-;#i just mean moreover in active conversations the way that i act is like. i always worry i am doing something wrong all the time forever#and maybe i would worry less if i could put more of my thought dump energy into observing others more attentively#to get a better read on things lol#me coming back to this post as an example bc i had another thought:#i also type rly fast and my brain goes rly fast so while i do clean up what i say typically#others might find it more convenient to be more concise due to typing slower#whereas i don't think before i type i just type as i think one to one#i lose thoughts otherwise but Thinking Before I Speak is a lost art to me rip#but then if i am talking to people irl or on voice i am so much more reserved. i ramble a lot!!#but it's easier for me to fall back
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louisa-gc ¡ 10 months ago
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how to start reading again
from someone who was a voracious reader until high school and is now getting back into it in her twenties.
start with an old favourite. even though it felt a little silly, i re-read the harry potter series one christmas and it wiped away my worry that i wasn't capable of reading anymore. they are long books, but i was still able to get completely immersed and to read just as fast as i had years and years ago.
don't be afraid of "easier" books. before high school i was reading the french existentialists, but when getting back into reading, i picked up lucinda riley and sally rooney. not my favourite authors by far, but easier to read while not being totally terrible. i needed to remind myself that only choosing classics would not make me a better or smarter person. if a book requires a slower pace of reading to be understood, it's easier to just drop it, which is exactly what i wanted to avoid at first.
go for essays and short stories. no need to explain this one: the shorter the whole, the less daunting it is. i definitely avoided all books over 350 pages at first and stuck to essay collections until i suddenly devoured donna tartt's goldfinch.
remember it's okay not to finish. i was one of those people who finished every book they started, but not anymore! if i pick up a book at the library and after a few chapters realise i'd rather not read it, i just return it. (another good reason to use your local library! no money spent on books you might end up disliking.)
analyse — or don't. some people enjoy reading more when they take notes or really stop to think about the contents. for me, at first, it was more important to build the habit of reading, and the thought of analysing what i read felt daunting. once i let go of that expectation, i realised i naturally analyse and process what i read anyway.
read when you would usually use your phone. just as i did when i was a child, i try to read when eating, in the bathroom, on public transport, right before sleeping. i even read when i walk, because that's normally a time i stare at my screen anyway. those few pages you read when you brush your teeth and wait for a friend very quickly stack up.
finish the chapter. if you have time, try to finish the part you're reading before closing the book. usually i find i actually don't want to stop reading once i get to the end of a chapter — and if i do, it feels like a good place to pick up again later.
try different languages. i was quickly approaching a reading slump towards the end of my exchange year, until i realised i had only had access to books in english and that, despite my fluency, i was tired of the language. so as soon as i got back home i started picking up books in my native tongue, which made reading feel much easier and more fun again! after some nine months, i'm starting to read in english again without it feeling like a huge task.
forget what's popular. i thought social media would be a fun way to find interesting books to read, but i quickly grew frustrated after hating every single book i picked up on some influencer's recommendation. it's certainly more time-consuming to find new books on your own, but this way i don't despise every novel i pick up.
remember it isn't about quantity. the online book community's endless posts about reading 150 books each year or 6 books in a single day easily make us feel like we're slow, bad readers, but here's the thing: it does not matter at all how many books you read or what your reading pace is. we all lead different lives, just be proud of yourself for reading at all!
stop stressing about it. we all know why reading is important, and since the pandemic reading has become an even more popular hobby than it was before (which is wonderful!). however, there's no need to force yourself to be "a reader". pick up a book every now and then and keep reading if you enjoy it, but not reading regularly doesn't make you any less of a good person. i find the pressure to become "a person who reads" or to rediscover my inner bookworm only distances me from the very act of reading.
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cordidy ¡ 3 months ago
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Just needed to get this out of my head after Sylus's Myth so i hope you like it :)
TW : drunk MC, fluff, it's sad I guess ? No proof read cause i'm a savage, english is not my mother tongue
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“......tail ?” 
“What did you just say kitten ?” Sylus asked, gently patting the back on your thigh while steadying you on his shoulder as you exited the elevator together, .
At first he had been quite surprised to receive your call.
Even more so when you bluntly asked him if he would be ok playing bodyguard and keep an eye on you while you indulged in a night of carefree debauchery at the club but hey, who was he to judge ? 
Besides, if you felt safe enough to be in such a vulnerable state around him, going as far as trusting him with your safety and your apartment key to make sure you would make it back safe and sound, he was not going to complain.
“I….I said…ooooh that spins…do…do you ever miss your tail ?” you repeated, your voice tired and slurred, words barely comprehensive despite your best effort.
Sylus couldn’t help the chuckle that came as you poked his lower back through his jacket.
You really were wasted…
But you had a good reason !
Your week has been shitty as hell.
Your nights were even worse lately, barely getting a couple hours of sleep only to wake up either with a sore throat, screaming or crying at something you could not recall.
And, on top of that, you were off duty as Zayne decided you needed a break and refused to sign your abilitation.
“Come on Zayne, look, I’m fiiiiiiiiine” you tried to convince him with a huge smile and so much concealer on your face you could open your own makeup shop.
“As your physician I cannot let you go on field with such results” he retorted not even looking away from your chart “You should be dead with such a high blood pressure”
“I’m a tough cookie !”
“And you’re going to have to stay in the jar until these get better. You’re not only a danger for yourself right now but also for your partner”
That was a low blow but he had a point.
Clearly, you needed a break, something to unplug your brain, something fun, a good night out to leave all your problems behind and get shitfaced to oblivion. What you did not need though was the unwanted attention a young woman alone at the club would probably get and, while you were very capable of handling those kinds of situations, you did not really want to have to be on the lookout constantly or end up in a cell for assault.
You tried Tara, back to her family for the Holidays.
Simone ? Night shift.
Xavier….doing God knew what God knew where….
So, with a heavy heart you picked up your phone and called your secret weapon…
“Not necessary,” Sylus finally answered in a calm, composed voice, as he opened your apartment door, being extra careful as to not bump you in the doorframe. Based on the current humming coming from you right now and your kicking feet, your head was already going to kill you tomorrow.
Better not add “commotion” to the list of your impending issues.
“To be honest, being half human half cat was quite annoying” he admitted, walking you toward your bedroom to tuck you into bed. “I don’t like not being in control of myself and beside, it was bad for business to be away from the N109 zone for so long...although…I kind of enjoyed having to hide here and spend time with you…” he added with his signature smirk, poking your side before tossing you onto the bed, making you giggle like an idiot as you plopped on your back. It was the first time you allowed him into your room and, although he did plan on being a gentleman despite what you could think of him when sober, he couldn’t help the loving smile on his face as he watched you mumble something about a potato bag while fighting with your plushies for room.
“I miss you tail” you retorted in your drunk voice, closing your eyes in hopes it would help with the dizziness while Sylus started to remove your shoes and socks.
“I quite remember you telling me how insufferable it was” the man said in a collected tone while making his way to the kitchen once he was done. 
“Yeah but it was sooooo pretty…I miss how you used it to grab me with it and…and toss me around ! That was funny !” you laughed, mimicking being tossed around like a ragdoll in the middle of your plushies as Sylus was coming back in your room, a glass of water in his hand.
He stopped in his tracks, a puzzled look on his face.
“I never use my cat tail to...toss you around” he corrected. His Evol, yeah, on a daily basis at some point actually, just to annoy you and enjoy those little lovely sounds coming from your mouth, threats mostly.
He had not been able to use it at all during the time those damn kittens from Hell had turned him into one of them though.
Your foggy brain did not hear him though and just kept mumbling in your drunken state, propping yourself on your elbows, trying to focus your gaze on him.
“You would think scales are cold and harsh…” you started, raising a finger to look all serious before falling back onto your pillow, not registering the look of surprise on his usually steady face.
“Kitten wh…” his voice was faltering as he looked at you getting all comfy like you had not just shaken his world upside down with your words.
“...but it was sooooo soft and sooooo warm…” you continued, grabbing your pillow to hold on tight as if you were looking for said warmth. 
Your voice was starting to fade as sleep was settling in.
“...felt safe when you wrapped it around me…I kept holding mine to sleep after…but…”
The glass in his hand fell to the ground, shattering as he froze in place, eyes wide open in shock. 
“…it was not…not the same…” you mumbled before losing consciousness, your body going limp against your pillow, before starting to snore.
______________________________________________________________ Pssssst, you liked it ? P2 is already up here :) https://www.tumblr.com/cordidy/770227784125677568/a-few-days-ago-i-wrote-this?source=share
1K notes ¡ View notes
iceunhie ¡ 1 year ago
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voicelines about you: as their lover ! (part 2)
featuring: sunday, aventurine, blade (+ black swan, acheron) [ part 1: dan heng, jing yuan, gepard, kafka, jingliu. ]
notes: well. the long awaited part 2 is here! (i took absolutely wayyy too long to finish this but a lovely anon requested the penacony cast so i just waited until now haha) stay tuned for either a future aventurine fic or a sunday fic tho; reblogs are appreciated! main masterlist.
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Sunday
About [Name]: Ah, you speak of my beloved. [Name] has managed to strike your interest as well? Heh, I'm joking. You aren't that type of person, no? ….But yes, my lover truly is quite stellar, if not incomparable. I doubt I'd find anyone in the universe as lovely as I do them.
About [Name]: Smitten Robin often jokes about how my eyes change whenever I see them. ‘Softens like the smitten man you are,’ she says. Well, my sister is hardly wrong about matters of the heart, and to be fair, her words are indeed correct. While I cannot be with them every second of the day, despite my only wish to do so…. I suppose this much is fine. At the very least, this bewitched version of myself shall ward any that dare take [Name] away from me.
About [Name]: Preparation. …My mansion has everything [Name] shall ever desire. As for I, what I only desire is them alone, and for them to be right by my side. When the time is right, what's mine shall also be theirs, and none shall ever separate the two of us again. Should anyone attempt it, well, there's a reason my mansion is built the way it is.
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Aventurine
About [Name]: [Name], [Name], [Name].... I see that you too have an eye for priceless treasures. Unfortunately for you, this particular one is already mine to behold. Mm, I wonder how my lover must be faring right now…. Missing them is truly, horribly debilitating.
About [Name]: Unworthy Whenever I think of [Name] being with me, of all people… Sometimes, the thought is unbearable. To think they would care for someone like me…. How truly lucky I am. Or maybe it's the other way around? Hehe, take a guess.
About Topaz: Contradictory Topaz and [Name] get along fairly well, despite her rather obvious dislike for me. Nonetheless, I suppose I can understand why. My lover is irresistibly charming~ Now, does this make me jealous, I wonder…. How about we bet on that?
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Blade
About [Name]: Though this sword may be battered and broken, if you harbor any intention of harm towards them, I will not hesitate to brandish this blade.
About [Name]: Mara Infliction When afflicted with mara, the senses are ravaged ceaselessly, muddying the mind—being unable to distinguish ally from foe. This is my path. And yet their face is clear, pure amidst the carnage, alleviating the haze for but a moment. My mind may be overridden with hatred, but I will never forget that feeling of salvation.
(BONUS: Kafka’s Voiceline about [Name] !) About [Name]: Truly A Shame Bladie’s little darling, hm? Definitely a wonder, that one, taming him so easily. Those two are definitely an interesting case, that's for sure. Scary, marastruck Blade and them…. truly a shame. Even I know just how the ending of that particular script will end.
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Acheron
About [Name]: …They are my lover, yes. Hm? Tell you more about them? Heh, I think you'd have better luck asking [Name] instead of me. I probably wouldn't even know where to begin.
About [Name]: Keeping Memories Despite the fact of my memories being in less than the best condition, [Name] always tells me about all the exciting things they've come across, whether it be delicious food from various planets, or even the most mundane things like the sound of the rushing water, the sight of fireflies in the night. They truly make everything worth remembering.
(BONUS: Black Swan’s Voiceline about [Name] !) About [Name]: Eye Of The Storm Ah, you speak of that Galaxy Ranger's companion…. The abyss that is her consciousness seems to only become calm in the face of them, akin to the eye of the storm. A shining light in the middle of nothingness—that is something that even she cannot let go of. No wonder Miss Acheron is quite taken with them.
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Black Swan
About [Name]: The memories of Memokeepers are sorted into various categories by their importance. As my lover, my memories of them hold the greatest value of all. Such memories…. even if the Remembrance wishes for me to hand them over, I doubt I will ever allow it.
About [Name]: Dancing My proficiency in the act of dancing is all thanks to my continued practice with [Name] on our shared time together. Fufu, ‘dates,’ if you will. Every moment I spend in their arms, swaying to the beat of the music at every turn… those are the memories I wish to forever retain.
About Acheron: Indebted One time, Miss Acheron managed to get lost in the middle of the Reverie Hotel’s halls... as usual. [Name] came across her then, and proceeded to have a lovely chat with her. I owe her a debt for keeping my lover company as I was preoccupied with some matters the Garden of Recollection entrusted to me to relay to the family. Next time, perhaps I should invite her over for some dinner with [Name]....
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end notes thanks for sticking around the part 2 (for the ogs who read pt 1) and do look forward to more HSR content in the future! also did i say i love aventurine
© 𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐇𝐈𝐄 : do not repost, copy, or plagiarize my work.
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prythiansprincess ¡ 6 months ago
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brother's bsf! mattheo who you've had a crush on for years.
but he's only ever seen you as theo's little sister (or so he says).
it doesn't matter that you and theo are only a year apart. your older brother is extremely protective of you and so are the rest of his friends — especially mattheo.
you grew up around the boys, which was a blessing and a curse in and of itself. on one hand, you grew super close to mattheo, but on the other hand, he's seen you through your awkward braces and pigtails phase.
lately though, brother's bsf! mattheo starts to notice you. really notice you.
suddenly, you didn't seem so little to him anymore.
but over the years, your infatuation with your brother's best friend calmed to attraction instead. you've come to accept that while mattheo would always be your first crush, that's all it would really ever amount to. a harmless little childhood crush.
thanks to theo, you hadn't gotten much of a chance to date when you were younger, but now that you were starting uni with the rest of the boys, you were determined to push those silly little feelings for mattheo away and start putting yourself out there.
granted, you had a lot to learn given your sheltered upbringing.
boys had taken a liking to you. why wouldn't they? you're pretty, you're smart, and you're the perfect combination of sweet and sassy, but you were also extremely naĂŻve.
brother's bsf! mattheo had to protect you.
it was his responsibility.
theo trusted him to keep an eye on you. so he did.
・❥・ brother's bsf! mattheo glares at any boy that dares to look at you.
・❥・ brother's bsf! mattheo revs his motorcycle and comes in hot when he sees anyone talking to you, handing you the pink helmet he keeps on him at all times without a single word.
・❥・ brother's bsf! mattheo gives you rides to your dorm and takes you out for ice cream after a particularly hard exam.
it's clear that mattheo has a soft spot for you. no matter how vehemently he denies it.
until the night that everything changed.
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it was a chilly friday evening when you happily skipped out of your dorm building, eager to attend your first frat party.
the cute boy in your history class asked you to come with him and you immediately said yes despite not knowing what to expect. it seemed fun and exciting and a little bit dangerous.
as luck would have it, you ran into none other than mattheo on your way out. his sleek black motorcycle was parked on the curb, smoke wafting from his lips as he took a lazy drag of his cigarette. leaning against his bike, mattheo raised a brow as you strutted onto the sidewalk.
"where do you think you're going, nott?"
"to a party, matty."
"with who?"
"a friend."
mattheo narrows his eyes at you. "I know all your friends and they're busy tonight. so which friend is it?"
you sigh in frustration. "just a friend from class. god, you sound like theo right now."
"you're not going anywhere wearing that."
"what's wrong with my dress?"
you smoothed down the front of your red minidress self-consciously, shying away from mattheo's intense gaze. his chocolate brown eyes scanned your body, the heat of his stare dragging along your skin.
"for starters, that dress barely covers anything and knowing you, you'll be cold within the first few minutes."
"I'll be fine, mattheo. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself."
mattheo crosses his arms, huffing at your statement. "so you told theo where you're headed off to tonight?"
you shrugged. "what my brother doesn't know won't hurt him."
"yes, but he might hurt anyone stupid enough to ogle you in that dress. as will I. maybe I should tell him what his baby sister is up to. better yet, maybe I should come with you to this party, hm?"
"no please," you pleaded. "I just want one night where I'm not being treated like a little kid. can you give me that, matty? please?"
you flashed your best puppy dog eyes at him, knowing that he couldn't possibly resist when you asked so nicely.
mattheo considers it for a moment before sighing in defeat. "fine, princess. but text me when you get there and call me when you're home. don't even think about turning your location off or else I'll send a brigade after you."
"yes sir."
"good girl."
before brother's bsf! mattheo could think better of it, you kiss his cheek and promise to call him later that night.
brother's bsf! mattheo watches you strut away in your tight little dress with a soft smile on his face, fully knowing that you had him wrapped around your finger.
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by the time you arrive at the party, it's in full swing. music is blaring, drinks are flowing, and the frat house is packed to the brim with people.
you send a quick text to mattheo to let him know you've arrived before spotting aiden.
clearly, your date was already a few drinks in. he greets you with a lingering hug before handing you a red cup. "cheers, y/n."
"cheers," you respond, clinking your cup against his and taking a generous swig. the liquor burns your throat and aiden chuckles as you try to hide your wincing.
still, it does the job.
you loosen up after a few sips. aiden introduces you to his friends and you smile politely, trying not to squirm out of his hold as he pulls you in by the waist.
it's fine, he's just keeping you close in such a packed crowd. he doesn't mean any harm by it.
at least that's what you told yourself.
until aiden tries to make a move on you in the middle of the dance floor. you already told him that you didn't want to dance, but he insisted.
you could smell the liquor on his breath as he grabbed your hips, moving them along to the rhythm of the song. you tried to put some distance between you, but aiden didn't seem deterred by it. in fact, his wandering hands slide down to your lower back until they're planted firmly on your ass. you attempted to pry them away, but he slurred "relax" into your ear before giving your ass a squeeze.
that was the tipping point for you.
with all your strength, you shoved aiden off while he cursed after you. the lights were blinding as you made your way through the crowd, fleeing to the bathroom.
you had brother's bsf! mattheo's number dialed before you even closed the door.
surprisingly, he picks up on the first ring.
"hi matty, are you — are you busy right now?"
"I'm with the boys. how'd the party go, princess?"
"um, I'm still here and I just really want to go home."
you hear shuffling on the other end. presumably mattheo finding somewhere more private to speak with you. "I thought your friend was your ride home?"
"well, aiden's drunk and he's been getting a little handsy the whole night so I don't really feel safe going home with him."
"what?" mattheo hisses. "you didn't tell me you were with a guy. I never would've let you go off alone with some random prick."
"please don't be mad, matty. I just wanted to have fun without worring about my brother hovering over my shoulder. don't tell theo, please. I'll — I'll figure it out. I'll find another ride."
"like hell you are! drop your location. the boys and I are coming."
"no, please. I don't want this to be a whole thing. if theo finds out, he'll never let me out of his sight again."
you could feel mattheo grappling with the situation. part of him wanted to tell his best mate, but all he truly cared about was getting to you as quickly as he could. after a few moments, he sighs. "fine, I won't tell your brother, but I'm still coming to get you. stay where you are, princess and don't hang up the phone. I'm on my way, okay?"
"you really don't have to —"
the argument dies in your throat when you hear the sound of mattheo's motorcycle starting up. he wasn't going to let you talk him out of this. mattheo was coming, whether you wanted him to or not.
"too late. be a good girl and stay on the line with me, sweetheart. I'm coming for you."
brother's bsf! mattheo pays no mind to the boys as they joke about him meeting up with a booty call.
the only thing that matters to him is getting to you.
brother's bsf! mattheo weaves through campus, revving and racing his motorcycle as fast as it can possibly go.
it's too noisy to talk while he rides, but he stays on the line anyways, listening through one earphone as you quietly hum to help calm yourself. mattheo smiles to himself. it's one of his favorite quirk of yours. half of the time, you don't even notice you're doing it. but he does. he notices everything about you.
mere minutes have passed since you first called him, but it feels like an eternity to mattheo when he finally pulls up to the decrepit frat house at the edge of campus.
mattheo parks his motorcycle on the curb, glaring at the prying eyes trained on him. it's not every day that the mattheo riddle, resident bad boy pulls up to a party looking like he's absolutely ready to kill someone with his bare hands.
he has half a mind to burst into the bloody house and pummel that stupid prick for daring to touch you, but the sight of you approaching stops him cold.
you look flustered and fearful, lower lip trembling as you spill out into the sidewalk. mattheo instantly sees red. he vows to make that motherfucker pay for this.
"where is he?"
"mattheo —"
"where. the. fuck. is. he?"
"probably somewhere inside drunk off his arse. I don't know and I don't care. can we please just go?"
despite his anger, you don't balk from him. in fact, you've got both hands pressed firmly against his chest to hold him back.
brother's bsf! mattheo grips your hips, your noses pressing together as he carefully inspects you. making sure you were alright is the only thing keeping him from committing violence.
"tell me where he is."
though mattheo's words are tinged with fury, his tone remains soft and sweet. his voice is nothing but a whisper because even at his angriest, mattheo would never raise his voice at you.
“give me a name, sweetheart. just give me his name."
"it's fine, matty. he's not worth the trouble."
“he left you alone, at a party where you don’t know anyone, got too drunk even though he knows he’s your ride home and got handsy with you even though you weren’t into it. give me one good reason why I shouldn’t fuck him up right now?”
“I can handle him later. can we please just go home? I'm tired and I just want to be in bed now.”
the cold air makes you shiver as you mentally curse yourself for picking such a skimpy outfit when hours ago you felt foolishly confident in your dress.
brother's bsf! mattheo softens when he sees you trembling. without a word, he takes off his jacket and drapes it over your shoulders. the scent of amber and cinnamon envelopes you all at once, lulling you into a calmer state.
"okay, princess. let me take you home."
once mattheo secures the baby pink helmet over your head, he tells you to hang on tight before taking off.
you hug his midsection, resting your chin on his shoulder as mattheo drives slow through the sprawling campus. the streets are empty, but he drags out the ride, wanting to spend as much time with you as possible.
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at the strike of midnight, the two of you finally reach your dorm.
although you insist that you're fine, brother's bsf! mattheo walks you all the way up to your door.
the fluorescent lights flicker overhead as you shift your weight form one foot to the other, suddenly feeling shy.
"thanks for picking me up, matty."
"of course, y/n. you know I'd do anything if you're the one asking."
you smile, trying your hardest to hide the blush on your cheeks. "I hope I didn't ruin your night."
mattheo shrugs. "not at all. before you called, I was watching berkshire stuff marshmallows down his throat while the boys cheered him on. trust me, you weren't interrupting anything important."
"still. I appreciate you coming to my rescue and not ratting me out to my brother."
mattheo smiles. "it's our little secret, princess."
the double meaning of the words causes tension between you and the pull that you've always felt towards mattheo feels stronger than ever, tugging you closer.
maybe tonight is the night that you finally feel brave enough to fall.
"goodnight, matty."
brother's bsf! mattheo watches as you get on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek like you always do. except this time, you lean in for a proper kiss.
as soon as mattheo's lips touch yours, you feel your entire body erupt like fireworks. it's everything you imagined it to be and more. his lips are soft against yours, supple and inviting. the kiss takes him by surprise, but once he realizes what's happening, he groans into your mouth, the sound of it filled with need.
dazed and confused, you look up as mattheo pulls away, his big brown eyes scanning your face. "we shouldn't do this, princess."
despite his words, mattheo's hand rests itself on your hip, his thumb brushing gentle circles against your exposed skin. you gulp as he stares at you, your lips brushing, your bodies gravitating towards each other no matter how hard you try to fight the pull.
"is it because of my brother?"
"no," mattheo growls. "we shouldn't do this because I don't know if I'll be able to stop once we start."
"I don't want you to stop, mattheo."
as soon as the words leave your lips, mattheo is kissing you again, and this time, he isn't holding back. you cling onto his shirt as he kisses you hard, the force of it hitting you all at once. his fingers dig into your hips as you bend at the waist, desperately kissing back.
his head is reeling and his heart is pounding. mattheo is drowning in your taste, your touch, your smell. you're every drug rolled into one; seductive and sinful. he's addicted and he can't get enough.
brother's bsf! mattheo doesn't want to pull away. he wants to stay here and live in this moment forever, but he knows that if he does, he'll end up taking everything.
foreheads pressed together, mattheo leans in for one last kiss. this one is sweet and gentle, enough to satiate him for the moment.
"sleep tight, princess. I'll see you in the morning."
"see you in the morning, matty."
brother's bsf! mattheo can't help but take one last look at you, a soft smile on his face when he sees your flushed cheeks and kiss bitten lips.
in that moment, he knows he's fucked. you're his best mate's little sister. he shouldn't have kissed you. he shouldn't feel this way for you. he should've stopped before it was too late, but you were both way past that now.
now that he's had you, he won't want anything else. it's you he'll always crave. it's you he'll always long for. and he doesn't give a fuck what it takes to get you.
brother's bsf! mattheo won't stop until you're his and his alone. *✧・゚:*
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crowsofdarkness ¡ 15 days ago
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After weeks of arguing, you thought your relationship with Bucky was near the end. That was until you held something positive in your hand.
18+ CW's below the cut(angst, language, unprotected pinv in Bucky's computer chair, Bucky having a sudden breeding kink)
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The door slamming in the small confines of my apartment echoed causing me to jump, doing whatever I could to keep the tears at bay. I wouldn't cry, not for him. Not for Bucky.  Even though the moment he walked in the door, all I wanted to do was cry not only because of the constant arguing but because I missed him terribly. He was here physically but emotionally, Bucky was checked out. 
"Asshole," I grumbled under my breath, eyes boring daggers into the closed door of his office/studio. 
It had been weeks of non stop fighting yet barely speaking to each other. He’d been gone on missions constantly so he could avoid being home. When I needed him the most, he was gone. 
Ignoring the thoughts plaguing my existence lately, I blew out a shaky breath and forced myself to turn back towards the kitchen counter.  The exhaustion had been buried deep in my bones for the last couple of weeks and I didn’t think it had anything to do with working almost every day. All I wanted to do was curl in bed to sleep the rest of the evening away. Even though Bucky's words from our fight this morning before I left for work kept pestering me. 
"I haven't thought much about the future. I'm trying to focus on getting myself better, mentally, before having kids." 
I asked him in the middle of yet another argument where he thought this relationship was going because I made the mistake of mentioning how I felt like things were stale between us. Bucky didn't think of the future. Of our future. He only thought of the now. 
It had been weeks of arguing. Weeks of walking on eggshells around each other. Weeks of not having sex. And weeks of keeping a secret to myself. Now that I knew how Bucky felt, I couldn't decide on if I should continue to keep it to myself or tell him which could potentially ruin everything. 
The urge to cry burned in my throat as I snatched the bag off of the kitchen counter and locked myself in the bathroom. I stared at my reflection in the mirror for a long moment, noting the dark circles under my eyes. 
Averting my gaze away from the mirror, I dug out the box from the bag and nearly choked on a breath when I read over the letters once more. I nearly dropped it in the pharmacy when the realization began to sink in. 
Pregnancy Test. 
I had missed my period last month and it was coming up on when I was supposed to get it this month but with how I’d been feeling, I knew I wouldn’t be getting my period this month either. 
That night was a night where we had a huge blowout argument, both of us questioning if we loved another. Deep down we knew we still loved each other and it was wrong for us to question it. But both of us were stubborn so instead of admitting our love, we decided to fuck out our frustrations; Bucky dragging me to the shower with him as I wrapped my legs around his midsection, marking his neck as mine while his cock slammed into me. Afterwards, Bucky helped me to our bed and apologized for the fight as he held me against his chest. I took the morning after pill later that afternoon once we realized we weren’t safe which is why I was hoping the test would be negative. Maybe the reason why I missed my period was because of all the stress I’d been under. 
“Might as well get this over with,” I grumbled under my breath while ripping open the box. 
It came with two tests and I figured it would be better if I used both so after peeing on both sticks, I set them on the counter and washed my hands. These next five minutes were going to be incredibly slow so after I changed into one of Bucky’s shirts and opted out of wearing pants, I paced the bathroom.
“Shit,” I clutched my chest when the timer on my phone went off. 
As I reached for the tests which were overturned, I paused for a moment wondering if maybe I should have been doing this with Bucky. 
“If he wasn’t such an asshole,” I muttered to the thought in my head and turned over the two tests. 
My heart was in my ears, in my throat, and in the depths of my stomach when I saw the one word that sealed our fate. 
Positive. 
Both tests were positive. 
“Fuck me,” I breathed while resting a hand on my stomach, the tears finally falling. 
There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that even though we were fighting, Bucky would be fine with whatever I decided to do. It was my choice. But would he stay with me? The Avengers seemed to be all over the world, helping people who needed it, hence why Bucky had been in a mood lately. I knew his anger wasn't directly related to me but because he’d been overworked. I also knew that didn’t give him the right to take it out on me. 
Pulling up Bucky’s text thread on my phone, shaking fingers worked out a text even though he was still in the next room. 
Me: I need to talk to you. It’s important. Can you meet me in the living room please? 
Bucky 🩶: Not right now. 
With a snarl, I snatched the tests off the bathroom counter and stormed out into his office, letting the door smack against the wall. Bucky didn’t bother to look away from the book on his lap as he sat on his computer chair. 
“Congratulations. You’re going to be a father,” I snapped before turning to walk away. 
The chair creaked as Bucky leaned forward to gaze down at his desk, a soft breath catching in his throat. 
“Doll,” his vibranium fingers grazed my wrist, halting me. “Wait.” 
“What? Are you going to claim I’m faking this?” I snapped, slicing him with my gaze. 
“I-,” Bucky’s face softened as he looked back at the pregnancy tests. “You’re pregnant?” 
I let the anger fade momentarily when I heard the sincerity in his voice; the slight excitement. 
“Yeah, I guess so. I missed my period last month and I’ve been so exhausted lately. Not to mention my boobs have been really sore,” I cringed while running a hand over my chest. 
Bucky glanced up at my breasts with a small smirk but then he let his gaze lower on my stomach where it rested for a long few beats of silence. Fear of what he would do or say weighed heavy on my shoulders causing me to remain frozen in front of him. The air in the room was thick with an unreadable tension and the ringing in my ears was deafening. I couldn’t even hear our shared breathing as Bucky continued to stare at my stomach before his large hands rested there.
“Hi,” he breathed. “I’m your dad.”
I dragged a finger over his cheek, those ocean eyes I adored so much gazed up at me. “I’m sorry.” 
“For what, doll?” Bucky asked with furrowed brows. 
“For everything. For avoiding fixing things between us by working non stop.”
I rattled off which made him link fingers with me and brought me down onto his lap, both of us now sitting in his computer chair. He rested his hands over my hip, slowly raising up the hem of my shirt so he could drag calloused fingers over my skin. It was the most contact we’ve had in a week and I leaned farther into him. His nose dragged over my jaw, breathing me in. 
“I’m sorry for all of the hurtful things I’ve said. I’m sorry for ignoring your feelings when I should have asked you up front what was wrong. I’m sorry for locking myself away with work instead of fixing things between us,” Bucky apologized. 
I looked deeper into his eyes, taking in the slight freckles on his face. “Can I be honest?” 
When Bucky nodded, I continued. “You freaked me out when you said you never thought of our future and now that I’m pregnant, I’m worried you’re going to leave.” 
“Absolutely not,” he cupped my cheek, dragging his thumb just underneath my eye to wipe away the stray tears. “I’ve never thought about the future until you came into my life, doll. I might not express it enough, which is my fault but please know you’re in my future. Especially now.” 
His free hand grazed over my stomach and I nodded into the grasp on my cheek, leaving a kiss on the inside of his palm. 
“Can you promise me one thing?” I asked. 
“Anything.” 
Biting my lip, I spoke. “Can you promise not to propose to me just because I’m pregnant? I want you to propose because you want to, not because you feel like you have too.”
Something flashed in his eyes but Bucky eventually nodded. “Of course.”
While sitting on his lap, the chair continued to creak underneath our shared weight and I sighed, ready to get off which caused him to tighten his grip on me. 
“Stay,” he breathed in the crook of my neck. “I need to show you how sorry I am.” 
Quickly, Bucky’s lips were on mine in a leisurely kiss. It started off like how our first kiss did, like he was testing the waters again. I nearly sobbed into the kiss when I felt the love pour out of him. I’d been desperate to feel this way again. With his hands on my hips, he began moving me up and down his lap, the hardness of his cock pressing against the thin material of my panties. His name fell from my lips, almost immediately swallowed by his tongue as it explored my mouth; tasting me. 
Vibranium fingers slinked up my shirt to graze over my back before Bucky tossed it over my head and down to the floor, breaking our kiss. Lust bleed in his already dark eyes as he looked at my stomach, his cock straining in his jeans. 
“Shit,” he groaned while pressing kisses along my chest. “I can’t wait to see you round with my baby.” 
A moan fell from my lips as I exposed more of myself to Bucky, his teeth now grazing over my nipples. Along with my sore breasts, my nipples were extra sensitive. 
“Bucky,” I pulled on his shirt. 
He immediately understood and helped me work it off. Immediately my nails raked along his chest as my lips met his again in a fiery kiss, this one more intense than the last. With a gentle tap to my ass, I raised my hips slightly so Bucky could drag down my panties with a bit of maneuvering. However with his jeans, it would have taken way more manuerving on his part to slide them off completely. 
“We should move to the bed,” I suggested, breathless. 
Bucky shook his head, keeping his lips on the current mark he was working on my neck. “Absolutely not. I want you to sit on my cock while I sit on the chair.” 
Feeling feisty, I pulled away from him slightly to gaze down at him. “Really? This has nothing to do with Steve making it slip the other day how he and his girlfriend did something eerily similar to this.” 
He rolled his eyes with a groan. “Please don’t bring up Steve having sex right now.” 
When he motioned towards his unzipped jeans, I let out a soft giggle and then reached my hand in his briefs to grab his cock, already so warm and hard. 
“I’ve missed this,” I whispered, gathering his precum to drag it over his head. 
“Doll,” my name came out through gritted teeth as Bucky rested his head on my shoulder. “I need to be inside of you. Please.”
Pulling his cock out from his briefs completely, I dragged it between my folds a few strokes before sinking down on him; both of us letting out a loud groan of pleasure.  It had been so long since we’ve felt this so I knew we wouldn’t last long. 
“Fuck,” Bucky strangled out while wrapping his arms around me to bring me closer. “I can’t wait to watch your belly get round with my baby.”
I mewled in response, mouth busy with leaving dark marks across his neck while one of my hands slipped between our bodies to press circles on my clit, bringing me closer to the edge. 
His cock twitched inside of me, indicating he was close when his hips stilled. “You'd look so beautiful pregnant with my kid. Your belly and tits-oh shit." 
“Don’t stop,” I begged while riding him faster this time, the chair nearly falling over. 
“Doll,” Bucky’s voice was strained so I brushed away the hair from his sweat slicked forehead. “I’m going to fill you up over and over again.” 
I nodded as the coil in my stomach began to ignite in a blaze of ecstasy, my orgasm about to snap. 
“I love you,” I cried out when my body finally snapped, arousal coating Bucky’s cock. 
With one final thrust, he followed me over the edge as he filled me with his cum and breathlessly announced his love for me as well. Falling into him with exhaustion, Bucky lifted me from the chair and carried me through our apartment towards the bathroom. 
“Are you alright?” He questioned while still carrying me. 
I pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m okay.”
Setting me on the closed toilet seat, he turned on the shower and removed his pants while we waited for the steam to bellow around us. 
786 notes ¡ View notes
euphoria-looney ¡ 2 months ago
Text
Thank you... for playing with me.
Pt.1
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Bake No Hana (Nightcord at 25:00 ft. Kaito)
"It's finally come around, my punishment for having been born. In order to put an end to it, I stop breathing— Ah, I'm fed up with this."
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I approached the girl who chose me last round, Penelope. I called her Penny though, and thought the name was cute.
It suits her.
Last round I wasn’t sure exactly what I was going to do, but she pulled me into her group, and even against the male group, we won!
It didn’t help that crunch that echoed across the room each time a team lost though, Astro has been colder than ever and the old guy got separated from me before I could follow him. I think it was fate that we all ended up on the same team.
I’m trying to sound positive because, at this moment in time, I have gone too far to give up now, whether that be hope or, the sick truth, for the money.
My mind is always racing and is looking for the truth that I’m hiding from myself. 
I’ve killed people intentionally or not, just to keep going for a cash prize that I’m not even sure I’ll win.
This isn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
I’ve said that line so many times.
When I was 5 and my mother ran away, that wasn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
When I kept getting neglected and abused in the manor, that wasn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
When I got kicked out at the mere age of 18, That wasn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
Getting into debt and sinking deeper into the amount needed to pay back, I bet you can think of the line I said next.
And now with all the corpses I’ve been near, the money dropping into the pig, the masked soldiers that looked upon you with their weapons, was this really how I was going to be free from debt? Was this the situation I wanted to be in?
“Hey!” Penny turned to look at me.
“Want to pair up?” I tilted my head at her.
“Why should I?”
“I don’t picture you going around here and begging these jerks.” I looked around at our options.
“Wouldn’t that bother you?” I raised an eyebrow to her.
“Bothering me or not isn’t the concern, winning or losing is.” Despite that, she didn’t make any plans to move away from me.
I cheered fondly at her.
“Then play with me, I’ll make sure you’ll win.”
“What will you do?”
“Whatever it takes.”
“... What do you see in me?” 
“Well, I wanted to ask you that.”
“You were someone who looked like they would come with me.”
“I feel the same way.” I raised my hand offering a handshake.
She took my hand, so warm compared to how she acted, and I tightened the grip before releasing her hand.
I’m glad we got the teams out of the way before the timer ended.
—
Third POV
“Alright, there's a five-minute break before the games start, my good sirs. Do whatever you’d like before coming back to meet up and enjoy the show, they’ll be playing marble games.” The frontman announced before everyone dispersed.
“What was that imbecile thinking, joining a game like this? She even had the option to leave and she chose to come back?!” Damian scoffed, rolling his eyes out of agitation.
“They did…” Duke murmured.
“No, they didn’t.” Damian looked at Duke as if he were mad.
“Yes, they did, a while back? You were there and berated them for acting like their mother…” Duke rebutted.
“That must’ve felt so humiliating…”
Dick rubbed his arm.
“... she was probably terrified to face you again, especially with how you treated her…”
Damian piped down after that.
“You’re not any better than us, Duke. You also shunned them away,” Tim said, defending himself and the others.
“I’m not saying I’m better than anyone and this doesn’t excuse what I did but all of you guys made it known through the whole manor that she was just like her mother, so greedy for money that even when she had too much she wanted more, is that what we’re seeing in front of us though?! A girl who's so loaded but still wants more?!” That left Tim speechless and guilty.
“I know what it’s like to be financially unstable, obviously after losing my parents and trying to find them it wasn’t easy, and it didn’t make it any easier with not even a penny in my pocket, so these people “killing themselves for a little money” even though it’s a life or death situation, that’s no different then being “free” out there, especially not in Gotham. So when Bruce rescued me and treated me with kindness and support, I thought that all his kids got this treatment, but now you guys want to berate her and call her an idiot but she was forced into this position…”
He turned to Bruce but was only met with the man looking away.
“Maybe when she left this game, she realized her life wasn’t meant enough and came back to this dehumanizing environment, she didn’t come for us to help her because of the memories of last time, she probably was so nervous always walking on eggshells around us that the moment we rejected her she knew that this was her only option.”
Jason knew it wasn’t targeted specifically at him, but at one point, he knew he had a bond with [name], that innocent kid with those cute bug eyes and that gummy smile. They had something special. Then he died and came back with the news. At that moment, he couldn’t help but feel betrayed by [name]’s mom. With everything that had happened to him,, he had changed his character, so with no one to blame…
Well, you are your mother’s daughter.
Doesn’t the saying go ‘like mother, like daughter?’
Also, the situation didn’t help with him constantly not talking to her, you’d have understood the feeling he got when she came to the manor after being kicked out just to beg for money?
He seriously could not blame the situation on you, did he, or did he forget that he contributed to it too?
The ignoring, the sneering, the insults, how one looks from the person she trusted the most could shatter her heart.
And of course that would be the first conversation she had with you... You didn’t talk to her.
“Well, did you guys hear what she said to that other girl, seems she has no plans-”
A knock interrupted the chat.
“I’m sorry sirs, but the games are starting. May I have your bets?”
“240”
“Wow, all of you, just in case she ever loses, would you guys like to buy her body? I assume you’re family and had an interest in that girl?”
“You!-” Damian was stopped by Bruce, who also had his hands clenched in anger.
“Thank you, that would be appreciated.” Smiled Bruce.
“Of course, and I didn’t mean you lose the bet, it’s just that the odds are against some players and good for others.” The Frontman nodded before heading off.
“Don’t worry, guys. Just hang on. I’m finding the location as fast as I can,” Oracle said through the earpiece before they left for the lounge.
Their nice, comfortable lounge.
—
If I am ready to die, why not know a little bit more about the person I’m spending my last moments with?
“You know~ since the last Joker attack nothing has been this tragic…”
“What game are we playing?” No small talk then… but that’s okay.
“Dang, you’re cold as ice.”
“What game are we playing, girl?”
“You tell me. These games are probably only known to these oldies, tell you what let’s make our own game, ten marbles we could do anything with that.
“So let’s… end this game in a single round.” I looked down at my lap.
“All or nothing. A simple bet.” I looked back at her again with my stupid smile that showed my gums and tilted my head.
It was something I was used to doing a lot as a kid.
I don’t know why I’m acting like this, maybe it’s because my misery will finally end.
That took a dark turn. Let’s get back on track.
“Don’t tell me you’d… rather do what they’re doing?” 
We looked at the old guys behind Penny, throwing their marbles that hit against each other. What was the purpose of the game?
Get the other players' marbles out before they do.
“Okay. Playing what then?” 
I huffed in amusement. 
“What’s with the hurry?” 
“You’re just dying to kill me, huh?” I teased
That was a rhetorical question, we both knew it…
At least I knew it was.
“We’ve got a lot of time on our hands, and we’re playing one round. What’s the rush?”
“What are we gonna do before then?”
“Talk” It had been a while since I’d done that with somebody in this hellhole.
“About what?” 
“Things we never told anybody about I guess.”
“One of us is gonna die, so… it doesn't matter what we tell each other. No one can really embarrass themselves anymore. Okay?”
—
“How long have you been in Gotham? It isn’t a place where one would particularly reside.” We were both sitting at the stairsteps at this point.
I started with a question.
“Just been here since I was born, my mom found the “love of her life” here. She said we’d enjoy it”
“Did you?”
“...” She didn’t reply but rather stayed silent.
“Your family, are they still here with you?”
“My brother.”
“Any parents?”
“My father died getting shot in some back alleyway, at the wrong place, at the wrong time.”
“And your mom?”
“She got high off of drugs when she lost my dad, she overdosed not too long ago and her family took her away from us blaming us for the reason she suffers. I don’t know if she’s still alive and recovering or dead.”
“Where’s your brother now then?”
“In a shelter,” she hesitated. I was asking more than giving, but she still replied, and that was enough for both of us.
“If you win this and get the money, what will you spend it on?”
“Buy a house for me and my brother, then take us somewhere else, Gotham is no place for us, even if the top schools are here, there’s a price to pay for everything.” She was right about that.
I scoffed a little bored of that answer.
“Hey~ with this amount of money you could buy that and so much more- is there anywhere you’d like to travel?”
“Houma.”
“Houma?”
She nodded her head.
“It looked peaceful and had lower crime rates than most places. It didn’t look like Gotham at all.”
I couldn’t help but huff at that.
“Hey. Don’t you think you should dream bigger, huh? Do Keystone City. Hold on– Go to Metropolis instead. They even have lower crime rates than most.
Penny finally turned her head around and looked at me for once out of this entire conversation.
“Metropolis?”
“Yeah, the Superfam lives there. You know the Kryptonite versions of the Batfam in Gotham?”
It seems she didn’t care much about superheroes which made me giggle.
“Really?”
She shook her head.
“Oh no, then we have you fix that, we’ll have a girl’s night out every week in Metropolis and get to meet the Superfam in the flesh, okay?” 
She looked away at that.
“Oh, guess we can’t both leave here?”
…
“Back when my father was alive he was the perfect guy, he was too generous for his good, I was too naive as a kid rushed into the room where he laid to rest before he was covered and saw his gorey body,” Penny told me.
“The first body I saw was this poor kid on the side of the street abandoned just like me, he died inhaling too much of Scarecrow’s gas.”
“Abandoned?”
“Oh! I haven’t told you my backstory, it’s not as tragic as yours, no. My mother married a billionaire and took cash before running away without me when I was five. Everybody blamed her actions on me, making me feel too shameless to ever ask for cash, then I got kicked out at eighteen and took too much debt for regular supplies and school debt then landed here.”
“I wonder if I had money, what would I do… Go to Houma with you?”
A silence ensued between us making me look away.
“Sorry, I forgot again.”
As the timer started running out the sun kept going down even lower. Penny stood up.
“Let’s do this.” I smiled at that.
—
Third POV
By now, some VIPs were disappointed not because they had lost money but because they had lost the guessing game of lives.
Others were happy with the result.
But for our main characters well, can you guess how they’re feeling?
Unnerved, whatever [name] was planning. Are they going to win this game, or will they lose? Would the Wayne family see their dear family die with a bullet to the head?
Bruce never meant to treat you like that, but you’d have to understand your mother betrayed him, and you were there… and you didn’t do anything.
Oh, what could you have done? 
Alert the whole house of her leaving? Then what?
It was never your fault, you did everything you could to appease them, they just never forgive your mother.
—
We stood up passing a dead body and went to an “empty” land.
“Whoever can roll it farther than the other person wins, okay?”
I let Penny get the head start.
I held my marble in my hand.
Pondering.
I didn’t have much to live for, did I?
I had no friends, no family, and nothing to my name other than the daughter of a gold digger or the bastard child.
What’s the point?
I I guess this game was pointless after all.
I let the marble slide off my hands landing a few inches from my foot.
Straightening my posture I feel Penelope approach me.
“Hey, what do you think you’re doing?” She grabbed me by the collar of the tracksuit.
“You win, I lose.”
“Stop. Why the hell would you try to do that?” She still kept a firm hold on me.
“Butter fingers, what can I say?” I chuckled, scrunching my eyebrows at her.
“Making sure I won. Is that what this is?”
She slammed me into the wall again.
“Did you think I would be grateful? Throw it again.” She demanded.
“And I still wouldn’t be able to win.” I kept my smile on.
“Ugh, don’t be dramatic and let me die in style, hm?” 
This was the reality, and if one of us had something memorable to do once we had gotten out of there, it would be her. Wouldn’t it?
“[name], that’s bullshit! Stop acting cool and just do a real throw!”
I sighed no longer keeping my damn smile on my face.
“I have nothing.”
“What?” Penelope didn’t let go, though. It seemed like she would allow me to talk a bit more.
“You have a reason to get out of this place… I don’t.”
Penelope kept breathing shakily. 
“I thought hard about what I would do, over and over, nothing. It’s like a dead end.” I felt myself tearing up.
I didn’t want to burst out in tears, I hadn’t done that in a while. 
I’ve always hated getting emotional, but it feels like a relief to get it off my chest.
“If anybody has a reason to go back out still there, it’d be you.” I laughed despite tasting the salty tears that leaked from my eyes.
Penelope didn’t seem the type to get emotional either, though that didn’t stop her from letting a couple of tears flow.
“Don’t die here, go out there… and find a place where you and your brother can reside. Far from any crime preferably to Houma.” I chuckled.
…
As Penelope walked away, I didn’t want that to be how our interaction ended, no, not like this pathetic goodbye.
“Penny!” I wasn’t sure she’d respond to that nickname but to my surprise, she stopped.
It made me widen my eyes briefly before going into a somber expression.
I held in my tears at that moment, stabilizing my voice.
“Thank you… for playing with me.” I was glad the guard let me have my closure, you don’t think they’d have the heart with their roles.
BANG
Player 240, eliminated.
—
The blood sprayed out before her body collapsed onto the ground with a sickening thud.
This wasn’t the situation anybody wanted to be in.
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— 
That’s it for now. In the next part of this option, the Batfamily will suffer and have flashbacks, as one does. If anyone has any advice on how to write some scenes, that would be spectacular.
I’ll be working on a request and then my So Much More series before getting to Astro! And then maybe the next part of this, so don’t expect it anytime soon. That’s all from me!
Taglist time! ❤
Also, I love the idea and from fic from both @jellyfishmoon97 and @not-weirdoshrek and a new addition that I'm super happy I bumped into @alilobsessive.
@holysoulsweets @sh4rk-k1d @sillysealsies @loomspuddle @cantfindmelol @alwaysholymilkshake @leitor-sonolento @randomlyappearingartist @beyondblissxoxo @sirairi @yhin-gg @frankie-moon3 @welpthisisboring @yokesmam @bat1212 @enchantingarcadecreation @twismare @delias-stuff @ladylupuscrow @ferchu0406 @c4xcocoa @cruzerforce4256 @anonymoushehehehe @godoreo22 @blerp-22 @facelessisnthere @sirenetheblogger @themightybee4067 @boredselkie @tiffyisme3760 @random4137 @midnightgrimoire @mybones537 @chaoticmoontimetravel @jsprien213
I think that's everyone who wanted to be tagged, I hope I didn't spell any wrong and tag the wrong person.
561 notes ¡ View notes
mellowwillowy ¡ 1 year ago
Text
𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐲
Yan! Lawyer Husband x GN Spouse Reader
—𝒀𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒐𝒃𝒆𝒓 - 𝑳𝑰𝒇𝑬 𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒋𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒕
CW: mafia related stuffs (ALL FOR READER...), disturbing ideations. NSFW
You were the subject of envy for everyone, the spouse of the infamous lawyer, Yulian de Alpheus, who possessed wealth, reputation, intelligence, and undying loyalty to you. To people, you were the beautiful dove living in the gilded cage he had given you, luxuries that fulfilled anyone's needs and wishes.
𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒊𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒊𝒍𝒅𝒆𝒅 𝒄𝒂𝒈𝒆?
To him, the one who was truly locked in the cage was him. He was and would forever be locked in the gilded cage, forever drowned in his adoration toward you. If he had to live in a world where you did not exist, he would not hesitate to shoot himself to death and find you again.
--
"Dear, how about we go on a vacation this month?"
His words had you choked on your food. He immediately stood up and pat your back, a handkerchief that you embroidered for him handed to you as he handed you a glass of water, "Apology, did my question catch you off guard dear?"
You shook your head while you regained your composure, "It's just that I was surprised, you had been busy these days so how could you spare me your time for a silly vacation?"
Yulian chuckled as he patted your head, "True, and I plan to work even harder to finish all the mess they had shoved me to work on, I'm sure I could finish it right in time before our estimated vacation."
You frowned to yourself, your husband had always been a hard-working man. It was no surprise judging by the amount of assets he could own at such a fairly young age. While some of it was thanked to his father, you knew those would not remain had he not worked hard to keep and grow.
"Dear, I don't want you to over-exert yourself with this case just for a vacation. If you were worried about me then please pay no mind, I am content with everything but you stressing yourself."
Yulian sat back and started slicing the meat on his plate, "Dear, I did not marry you just to have you live in this house as a prisoner," the way he sliced things was of good etiquette but you knew. You knew how he always looks at the things he sliced as a subject of... low-life. "I want my beloved to live in happiness, a life where you get to have and own anything you want without a single worry," It's almost as though he wished he could use more force with the knife, "A life where you do not wish to end," Yulian used his fork to pick the sliced meat up to your lip, "A life where you wish you could live in for eternity."
You thought to yourself for a moment, drowning in thought before smiling at him, "Yes, a vacation this month sounds nice." You opened your mouth and ate the piece.
--
"What were you even thinking about to the point you tangle yourself into this mess?" Yulian furrowed his eyebrow, in his office was the leader of a renowned mafia group in the underground world and Yulian sat on the leathered chair with his hand wiping his white gun.
The ringleader's subordinates were clearly displeased with the way Yulian easily belittled the case and him but they knew better than to cause a mess.
"So? What do you need this time?"
Yulian stored the gun back in its respective place, locking the shelf with the key before handing the ringleader's subordinate a folder of files.
"I'll need you to fabricate everything I handed you. I've given you options of people for you to use as a scapegoat as well."
The ringleader took the folder and started reading the files in it, scanning the words that were typed on it.
"And I expect you to finish it all by this week. I'll be taking a vacation for myself by the end of the month so I'll finish the case in a few trials. I'd like you to find a way around the judge and jury as well. The more the better, understood?"
Yulian was an infamous lawyer. A lawyer who would validate any way to make his client proclaimed 'Not Guilty'. As much as he hated having to drag his name around the underground world, he had no choice but to work together with them. Why?
"Fine, I'll inform you everything this weekend." The ringleader left the room with his subordinates following behind him meekly. The moment they had walked out of his building and entered the car, one of them posed a question.
"Why did you let that shrimp belittle you, boss? It's not like he is the only lawyer we could have our hand with."
The ringleader did not look at his subordinate as he was still analyzing the content of the files. Even so, he was still attentive enough to answer them back, "Well, if you know exactly how strong my influence is, why do you think I allow him to boss over my men?"
The man gulped as his hand held the steering wheel tightly. Why would a measly bug be able to hold power over his boss?
"... He somehow got his hands into our mud. In simpler terms, he blackmailed me."
His right-hand man sighed, "Yulian is nothing but a coward, Kaspar. A coward."
What difference did it make to him? The fact that the two of them blackmailed people to survive while the ideations were biased to each side was nothing but hypocrisy.
"And yet he is the coward that dared to step into the underground world just to protect his spouse..." Kaspar winced at the word 'spouse', "he did all of that just for the love of his life. Is that supposed to be considered foolish or not...?"
The men fell silent until one of them proposed a question, "Then why not use his spouse against him?"
--
The basement that you did not know even existed. You knew there was a bunker down your house but you were never aware of the existence of the basement.
You were asleep so technically you couldn't have heard anything. No, the room was made to be soundproof, no one could hear what was going on in the room.
But you heard it anyway. You heard it faintly, the sounds of people screaming. It wasn't clear, almost below a whisper but it kept you awake. You looked to your side and found your husband absent from the bed again.
"Is he working again?"
You stood up and slipped your feet into the slippers before walking out of your shared bedroom. The hall was lit up by the warm white lights, the light that always comforts you no matter what. You walked toward his office which was located on the first floor, giving the grand door a knock before entering it.
"Dear?"
No one was inside the room. The room was laced with the smell of coffee, the only thing that he probably could love aside from you. You walked to his desk and read some of the files on it. The words on the paper were beyond your comprehension so you stopped reading it, glancing at the cup of coffee, you feel the cup with your hand. It's cold and full. Weird.
You took a look around his office, bookshelves on the side while a framed portrait of you and him hung on the other side.
He must have really loved this portrait, refusing to change it with a new one.
"Dear?"
You jumped at his voice, where did he come out from?
"Dear, where did you come from?"
"Ah, I was in the washroom. What brings you here? Did something wake you up?" Yulian asked you as he approached you while drying his hand with his handkerchief.
You took a closer look at it, it's not the same handkerchief you gave him. Weird. He had always been insistent on only using the handkerchief you embroidered for him.
"Dear?"
"Ah," you snapped out of your thought, "it's just that... I felt lonely. How long are you going to stay up again tonight dear?"
Yulian thought to himself as his eye shot toward the corner of the room, "Please, don't wait for me. I won't be finishing my work in any time so I hope you would use those time to retreat yourself to bed." Yulian pat your cheek before giving your cheek a peck, his emerald eyes had always drowned you in a ripple of the lovesick sea.
His hand snaked its way to your waist as he led you back to your shared bedroom, opening the door for you and urging you to lay on the comfortable white bed. He placed the blanket on top of you before sitting next to you, humming a lullaby while easing you down.
"My little Lily of the Valley is a curious soul hm? Your husband told you to sleep and you naughtily sneaked out of your room..." He playfully reprimanded you while you tried to drift yourself back to sleep. Hearing him teasing you like this was weird, but at least in a good way. What boosted his confidence?
"Someone like you should not wander around in the mercy of nighttime, even if it was in our own house," his hand caressed your hair while his eyes stared into your half-lidded ones, "my lily-of-the-valley should not wander around in the darkness anymore..."
Did you hear him right? Come to think of it, what woke you up earlier?
"Good night, my love."
--
"Good night, bastard."
A thud and the man who was tied to the chair plopped down, lifeless. The other men could only tremble in horror as they waited for their turn. Perhaps death would be the only slightest bit of virtue that he could offer, a mercy at his hands that was covered in bloodstains.
Just as he approached the other men, the alarm rang. Someone had entered his office. Yulian turned on the screen to the camera and saw you walking toward his desk, observing everything that was scattered on it.
He was glad that he didn't put anything 'suspicious' on it even if you wouldn't understand it. He didn't want to risk it.
Yulian went to the sink and washed his hands before motioning for someone to come out from the darkness. The members of the mafia walked out and waited for his order.
"Ah right, relay this message to your boss. Not only do these bastards will have to face the consequences of trying to touch my beloved, you guys too, will have to face it."
The men shuddered in fear as they thought of what he could do to them. The greatest mercy they could have would be that their boss would be the one who punished them and not the lawyer himself.
"Remember," Yulian walked toward them, hand taking out the handkerchief you embroidered for him, "I work for Kaspar so that this kind of thing won't happen. If this happens again, I'd personally make you guys crawl through the tunnels of prison for eternity."
His emerald orbs almost lit up into a burning fire as his jaw tightened in anger. He made his way toward the door before taking a look at the handkerchief.
He shouldn't use it for something so filthy.
He slid it back into his pocket and used another plain handkerchief instead.
--
"In short, he is the man who would not hesitate to kill his own children, his own blood and flesh, or his family just to save and love his beloved Lily of the Valley."
Kaspar sighed as he read the report. The scapegoats that he offered were his men who were on duty to protect his spouse.
"He is the man who had lived for eternity just to find and love his beloved again and again."
-- log end
Afternotes:
I didn't expect the fic to be this short (says the one who got lazy mid-way and cut half of the story...) anyway, I thought to myself, rather than let this rot in the draft, wouldn't it be better to post it even if it was only half completed without any proofread yet?
I'm really happy my first LIfE Project event features my favorite son, Yulian first! The next one might be Eleanor!
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klausysworld ¡ 1 year ago
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Hi could you write some angst about a deeply insecure reader who hates her appearance and is sort of friends with Elena and everyone(pushed to the side kind of relationship)but when klaus comes around it’s clear that she has a crush but believes he’s out of her league then klaus uses it to his advantage by showing an interest in her for information and helps her with her self worth.klaus then starts to develop feelings for her but then it’s revealed that he was just manipulating her and reader is devastated and utterly humiliated and it sets her back to how she was before him.(sorry if that was a really long explanation,you can decide the ending)thanks I love your writing btw
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Real
Growing up in Mystic Falls is a bizarre experience.
There were town events almost every month where you had to dress up and act better than everyone, parents basically had a competition over who had the prettiest daughters or the most handsome sons.
Not my parents.
They didn't think I was good enough to even pretend that I could compete. I was told my worth from a young age and became more aware of it with time. When your own parents don't think you're good enough it's sort of an eye-opener if you will.
It didn't help that everyone in this town seemed to be born into modelling.
Somehow I was lucky enough to wind up 'friends' with people like Elena, Caroline and Bonnie but I knew I didn't belong with them. Somehow they were gorgeous enough to get whatever they wanted.
Sometimes I wondered if everyone else at the age of 17 looked like them and I was behind or if somewhere, I was above average. I doubted it. A lot.
Occasionally I would look at a mirror and think that I wasn't even that bad to look at. There was nothing particularly ugly about me, there just wasn't anything special. I looked plain in a way, bland and forgettable.
I was very forgettable actually. My 'friends' made that abundantly clear throughout the years when they would go out without me or forget to ask if I also wanted something or liked something.
Somehow I was of no value to them. Perhaps I was simply there to amplify their beauty. Like a DUFF. I was definitely the DUFF.
Damon actually told me that I was once, after Tyler had made the joke and Damon asked what it meant. Even though I already knew it to be true, to be told it was much worse.
You could sort of tell everyone else was thinking it, especially when I was stood beside Caroline.
Stefan was the only one who was nice but I wasn't sure if it was out of pity or just because that was who he was. Then again, I'd rather just not know.
So I tried my best to keep in the background, avoid attention and stay out the way.
Even with all the vampire and werewolf drama that took course, I kept myself quiet and to the side. Strangely it was Katherine who was kind to me, whether she had an ulterior motif I'm not so sure anymore but she never hurt me in the time she was there. Neither did Elijah when he came to town, he was polite to everyone but it was obvious that my presence was irrelevant to him.
And then of course, Klaus arrived.
I didn't officially meet him until the senior prank night, he sort of just threw to the side and told me to keep my mouth closed and not to bother running because he'd just kill me. Part of me thought about running anyway so he would just end it but I didn't.
Klaus dragged me by my wrist into his car, told me to keep quiet while he drove Elena to the hospital. For whatever reason he brought me along and left me in the car as he went to drain her of blood for his hybrids. I did as told: sat silently and waited.
He came back out and spoke to Damon for a moment, I saw them glance over in my direction only for Damon to laugh and smirk. I sighed to myself and got out the car. It was clear that Klaus thought I could be a good pawn but was surly mistaken and Damon told him to do whatever he wanted to me. In response I walked home, neither noticed so it was fine.
A week or so later he came back, crashed homecoming or something? I dunno, I wasn't there but I was told about it the next day via a stroppy Caroline.
It was that same day that he came and sat beside me at the grill. I ignored him for the most part, confused by his attempt at what I could only guess was flirting? I wasn't really sure. I think he could tell.
"Not easily impressed are you love?" he questioned as he leant forward, uncomfortably close. I sort of just looked at him, still unsure to what he wanted. A smirk pulled at the end of his lips and his hand lifted, his fingers wrapping around a piece of my hair making frown and pull away abruptly. Without hesitation I stood up and spun on my heel, going to leave. His laugh followed me and a hand grabbed my waits, it was stange.
"Calm down love, It's not like I was going to rip it out, I just wondered what it felt like" he chuckled, pulling my back flush against his front making me tense and squirm.
"It feels like hair" I stated simply "Now get off" I grunted, shoving my elbow into his side to make him let go. I kept walking, keeping my eyes on the ground.
The next time I saw him he apologised for the previous encounter which again, i didn't understand but there was no point in questioning and arguing so I just accepted it and tried to leave but he asked if I'd stay for one drink, he asked so nicely and he smiled. I was stupid enough to think it was genuine and accepted.
Looking back it was pretty obvious that this was a game for him or a trap, whatever you want to label it but in the moment I ignored what was right in my face. Deep down I knew it was all a joke of sorts really.
But no boy, let alone a man had shown me this sort of attention and the soft fluttering it made me feel had me staying for far too long. I listened to his little stories and asked a range of questions as the drinks kept coming. He asked a couple about me but i gave relatively vague answers. There wasn't much I had to give him on me, I wasn't up for a pity party about friends and I didn't really fancy talking about my shitty parents either. I think Klaus picked up on the fact that I didn't really want to talk about me and eventually gave up with it.
It was late when I realised I needed to get home and he offered to take me which I admit made me wary. I didn't want him to kidnap me and think I'd be any good as leverage again, though I guess Damon made that pretty clear already. I decided to just walk home which he eventually accepted and got into his car.
Walking by myself probably wasn't my best option after drinking so much in one go but I made it home with minimal stumbling. My mother shook her head when she saw me and asked what was wrong with me. When she realised I had been drinking her mind jumped to two very different conclusions. The first being that I was being a slut which was ironic as in the past she'd made it clear that no guy would want to sleep with me, and the second being that I had taken pills to kill myself.
Listening to her drastic thinking made me wonder what kind of pills she was on but I didn't question it and waited for my father to come and take her to bed, telling her to just ignore me. Then I proceeded to make my way to the bathroom, getting changed and washing my face before going to my bed.
My phone dinged making me sigh, thinking it was Elena asking me to help her with something dumb and life threatening however much to my surprise it was Klaus. A smile involuntarily spread across my face and we messaged back and forth before he told me to rest.
The following few days he would just check in. Not too much but he also made it clear that he hadn't forgotten me which was all I had ever truly wanted from someone. To be acknowledged at the very least.
Of course I didn't tell the others that he had been talking to me, besides they didn't ask so I didn't see why I should. I guess I just wanted something for myself.
I wasn't completely stupid. I always had the feeling that he was using me, especially towards the start...but he was just so wonderful with his words and his ways.
When he began to make and buy sweet gifts and claim they were tokens of his affection, I couldn't help the blush on my face. When he would find a way to have his skin against mine, or how he would pick up my hand and gently tug my along. Somehow we always seemed to end up somewhere for food, and he would always refuse to let me pay.
Something about him was so enticing, addictive if you will.
He began to make me feel a certain way. He made me warm and happy. His touch was so soft, it made me feel like I was buzzing. i was stupid for thinking he could feel the same way about me.
I had been so scared to admit my feelings.
He had assured me that he would never push me to.
He told me that he liked me, that he didn't want me to be frightened of him or nervous around him. "Not unless it's the sort of nervous that puts butterflies in your stomach sweetheart" he had teased and my cheeks had glowed red.
Over the space of months his presence never lessoned. He always made time to see me, and speak with me. I found myself longing for his voice, his touch.
On days where he was too busy at home, he would urge me to come over. I would spend as long as I possibly could with him, a few times I even stayed over but he had slept on top of the duvet so that I would feel comfortable.
This had gone on for a small while until he actually said the words 'I love you'.
Perhaps I was just so happy to actually hear those words. Maybe I believed them to be true, real. Or I just saw what I wanted to see, heard what I wanted to hear and ignored the rest.
The time I gave myself to him used to make my smile and blush. Now it just makes me feel dirty, humiliated and embarrassed.
Knowing that he could and has had his hands all over my body, his lips and eyes. In the moment I felt like a goddess, probably because that’s what he told me I was. The memory of him inside me haunts me. I had thought it to be such a beautiful experience, romantic and personal.
I wish I could say that I had slept with him only once but as the months went by we would share intimacy often.
I had even told him that I loved him, so many times and I meant it for all of them.
So you should understand why it was so hard to accidentally hear him tell his sister that he had been compelling me for any information on the others.
It had felt as though my heart had stopped when the words hit my ears and tears already made my eyes burn. I heard a weak laugh and turned my head to see Damon, strung up by chains whilst bleeding all over, looking straight back at me.
“Y/n…” I heard Klaus’s voice, his tone one of panic or maybe it was just surprise. He probably didn’t want me to know of his routine. Damon only rolled his eyes and gave me look,
“You didn’t…think it was real, right?” He coughed, a cruel smile on his face.
His words just made me quieter. They made me think. Why did I think it was real?
My eyes slowly lifted to meet Klaus’s. I could see and feel Rebekah looking at me, everyone was silent. Even Damon shut up for a second. I think maybe he was expecting me to say something but I didn’t really have anything to tell him.
As awful as it all made me feel, and even with the amount of emotions swallowing me, I felt more disappointed in myself than I did him.
My right hand went to my left arm, pinching my skin through my jumper in some sort of hope that I’d wake up from some stupid nightmare but it didn’t work.
The first tear fell from my eye and I sniffed to keep the other ones from coming.
Klaus just looked at me, I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, I didn’t want to know either. I could just guess anyway.
So without a word I just turned around and left, walking quickly back out the door before breaking into a sprint in the direction of my house. I could feel the mascara running down my face, ruining the foundation I had only recently started wearing, for Klaus’s benefit.
My hands wiped at the tears as I pushed my from door shut behind me and went upstairs, blocking out the annoyed voices of my parents and locking myself in my room.
It was only once I was in the shower that I was flooded with memories. That I remembered all the things I had done with him. By the time I stepped out of the bathroom my skin was scrubbed raw in an attempt to wash his touch away. Even the slightest touch made me feel as though my body was burning, stinging with pain but I would have rather felt that every day than have to realise Klaus had been using me for over a year now.
I was curled in my bed, hidden under the blankets and surrounded by the dark as I let every comment not matter how small or petty play back through my mind.
I wasn’t even sure who to be upset with. I chose myself.
Klaus must’ve known I was an easy target. Desperate. I wonder how much he’s had me tell him. To be fair I knew more than you’d expect about what was going on. I had gotten good at observing and overhearing so I still knew what was going on, even when spending so much time with Klaus himself.
I also wondered what else he had compelled me to do. I hoped he wouldn’t do anything other than ask questions but I couldn’t help that fear creep inside me. It made me sick to my stomach, and then I wondered if he would just wait to compel me again so that I could continue to be his information feeder.
The idea made my fingers dig into my arm, bruising the skin purple but I wouldn’t stop. I only did so that I could go get some vervain that I kept downstairs in one of the cupboards at the back. I was reaching for the little glass bottle when I heard a door close. I spun around quickly to see Klaus in the doorway of my kitchen. My hand clutched onto the vervain tightly and I noticed his eyes glance at it briefly. His hands went up as if to show no harm but there was no way I would believe that meant a thing.
“Sweetheart- listen to me..” he began and I let out a breathless laugh
“Get out” I whispered making him sigh and frown as though he had the audacity to be upset or annoyed.
“Y/n..”
“No Klaus. I’m fucking serious, get out.” I told him, my eyes watering again. I let out an involuntary whimper when he stepped forward making him stop and stand still.
“I never meant for you to know that” he whispered and I frowned, swiping a tear away.
“Sorry I ruined your plan” I mumble, exhausted.
“No- no I didn’t mean it like that- I meant that-“
“Klaus it’s fine” I murmur, avoiding his eye, “It’s fine, I get it. You needed to know what was happening, you got to be two steps ahead. I’d appreciate if you just found someone else now please”
I could feel his stare on me, it make my skin itch and I just needed him to go. I could feel my hand getting clammy as I held onto the bottle.
“I haven’t compelled you in such a long time” he muttered, as though maybe that made it better. “I used to, but I truly have fallen for you Y/n. I love-“
“Please get out” I cut him off, my spare hand resting on my forehead to cover my eyes.
“I love you”
“No you don’t” I cry, “you wouldn’t do this to someone you love. I know you don’t love me. You never have and you never could. You’re just pretending again so I’ll let you control me, I don’t like it” I whimper, tears streaming again. I could hear him getting closer but I was already against the counter and I couldn’t out run him. There was no point in trying.
“Sweetheart, I’ll never use you again-“ he tried to argue but I couldn’t listen to it.
“I really, really need you to leave. Please Klaus just get out, I can’t stand you” I tell him honestly and for a second as I look up at him, he looks almost sad but I have to assume it’s still apart of his act.
“You- you’re not going to do anything…anything harmful are you? To yourself, I mean.” He asked and I felt a wave of embarrassment wash over me. I should never have told him that I’d had those thoughts or feelings once. I shouldn’t have ever said a word to him.
“No…now go away” I whisper, my hands trembling as I stared at the ground, listening to his footsteps eventually get further away.
I knew there was no way I could sleep, he was probably still outside my house. Waiting.
I wasn’t sure what he was waiting for but I could him there.
I had no idea what I was going to do.
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roebeanstalk ¡ 10 months ago
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6/2 Update: Security deposit has been paid!! Thank you so much to everyone for the help 💚 I still have to pull together all of June rent for my current place which is $675. Thank you everyone for all of the help so far 💚
I’m asking for help with June rent, which is $675 and needs to be paid ASAP.
Cashapp https://cash.app/clawshot
venmo https://venmo.com/rmck89
ko-fi https://ko-fi.com/roebeanstalk
Any help at all is super appreciated. Every dollar adds up, and shares are so helpful too. I know that I’ve received so much help from people in the past and I can’t thank you all enough. I hope that this is the last of these that I have to do.
Needs:
June rent: $23/$675
Security Deposit: $495/495 Paid 💚
Bonus:
July rent (First month at new place): $495
Movers + Uhaul: $300-350
More info on my situation under the cut!
Thank you so, so so much.
I have a history of mental health issues, and as a result I have a very difficult time getting and maintaining employment. My mental health also impacts my ability to keep up with and complete freelance/commission work in a timely manner. While I have made some incredible steps forward lately thanks to the right combo of therapy, medication, and a support system, I am still not at a point where I am self-sufficient yet. I am getting there – and I am committed to keep trying no matter what.
Original post blurb, taken out of main post since deposit has been paid:
My landlord has decided not to move forward with me as a tenant due to my history with payment/mental health. While this is frustrating as heck, it’s allowed me to find a better, more affordable housing situation. I have signed a lease at a new place and move in July 1st!Once the deposit is paid, my space on the lease is officially secured and I am good to go. This is the main thing that I am looking for help with.
Why I need help:
This new housing situation is incredible for me – it’s a room in a quiet house with two other queer folk, and the rent is very affordable compared to my current situation. The new place is $485/month, the current place is $675/month. Even with utilities, my total overhead for shelter will cost less than rent at my current place. If I can secure my spot in this house and move forward, I see such a clear path forward for me in terms of self-improvement and self-sufficiency.
For the first time in 15 years, I feel like I can tackle the things ahead of me. If you’re able to help out I would really, really appreciate it.
What I’m doing:
I am job hunting for something that works well for my situation. With the cost of rent, I think that a part time job will be able to cover it. The process of getting a job is difficult for me, but I am committed to continuing to work at it.
On the art front, I have occasional comic coloring jobs that help me out. I also have commissions – I have finally been moving forward at a good rate and have been really happy with my work. In time, this will be able to be a more standard income route. I also have a Patreon that brings in about $65/month.
Cashapp https://cash.app/clawshot / venmo https://venmo.com/rmck89 / ko-fi https://ko-fi.com/roebeanstalk
Thank you so much for reading over all of this. Thank you to everyone who has helped with donations or kind words or reblogs. Thank you so much to every commissioner and customer who has been patient as hell with me on artwork, communication, and stickers. Thank you thank you thank you. Thanks to every single one of you I have been able to keep pushing myself forward, and I'm so happy to keep doing it and make good on everything. And eventually, give back to my community. I love you all so much, even though i don't know any of you that well. Thank youuuu. <3
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jinwoosbabyboo ¡ 7 months ago
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“Will You Marry Me?"
How I imagine LADS Men would propose. This is part 2 of 2. I tried to do the sweet elegant writing, but that ain't me so here you go....
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Xavier
Our lover boy Xavier is a literal prince. I feel as though he'd be very traditional with his proposal. The only unfortunate part is he can't ask for your fathers/family blessing because you know .... Anyway :)
He would definitely court you for a week even if you’ve already been together for over a year. The day of his proposal he would take you to a spot only he knows that has zero light pollution. Of course it’s deep in the forest.
MC: If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re trying to kill me and hide my body Xavier: You have such creative thoughts MC: Seriously where are we going? Xavier: Somewhere special MC: So mysterious even after a year of dating
He’d bring you to a clearing that seemed like it was being lit up by a spotlight. It’s not though he chose to propose on a night with a full moon and clear skies so you could see how beautiful the stars are without all the city lights.
MC: It’s otherworldly Xavier: This was my favorite place to come when I needed clarity MC: Why didn’t you show me sooner? Xavier: I wanted to save it for a special day MC: oh what are you going to propose or something?
You’d be laughing and boom he pulls a ring out of his pocket shutting you right up.
MC: Oh shit! You’re really proposing Xavier: Yes im really proposing
His speech is so sweet it could give you cavities not only would he emphasize how much he loves you he’d let you know just how much he is solely yours. Even if you were to one day forget him and how much he loves you he would still always be yours and would do anything to keep you safe & most of all happy.
Xavier: My lady will you marry me? MC: I want nothing more
He might’ve been sweet and soft spoken during his proposal but that shy boy facade went out the window when you two got back home.
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Sylus
It’s canon that Sylus gets nervous when he wants to ask you out. So just imagine how nervous he is getting ready to propose! He already constantly gifts you pretty gems and the gifts just keep increasing over the course of 3 months.
He second guesses himself thinking you may say no so he keeps putting it off but continues to shower you in gifts, quality time, full body massages, shopping sprees, dinner dates, lunch dates, you name it he’s doing it, you want it he got it. He’d be spoiling you so much you’d have to sit him down and ask him what’s going on. He would dismiss your concerns of course.
MC: Are you guys leaving for a while? Kieran: Why do you ask? MC: Sylus has been acting weird I feel like he’s about to disappear again Luke: That was one time and boss only did that because you asked him to leave you alone MC: I know but I’m worried now Luke: Relax miss hunter you’re overthinking
The twins would indeed gaslight you while Sylus worked up the nerve to propose. When he finally has the nerve to do it he goes all out. I’m talking he'd rent out the most exquisite restaurant money can buy. A whole staff at your beck and call. He'd wine and dine you with delicious food and expensive wine. By the time dessert comes you'd want answers.
MC: You're leaving me aren't you Sylus: Jumping to conclusions are we? MC: I'm serious Sylus you haven't been yourself lately you're worrying me Sylus: I guess this is the part where I explain myself
With two snaps of his fingers the twins would rush out; Kieran placing a giant box bouquet of red roses in your arms and Luke placing a crown on your head before rushing out leaving the two of you alone.
MC: What's this? and what am I a Princess? Sylus: You are and I'd love to change your title to Queen MC: Stop are you....
I don't picture Sylus giving a long winded speech. I feel like he would be the type to write it down so you could cherish his words forever.
Sylus: Will you marry me Miss Hunter? You can say no if- MC: Of course I'll marry you
Yet again I'm tackling this man as soon as he slips that ring on. Need to be in his arms immediately. Expeditiously.
Zayne & Rafayel here…
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roosterforme ¡ 3 months ago
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Aim for the Sky Part 31 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Everything starts to get very real once you're able to feel the baby move. It's time to share the news of your second pregnancy with family and friends, but it's hard to feel elated when Bradley starts showing attention to one of his pilots after work hours.
Warnings: Angst, adult language, body image, DILF Roo, oral sex, pregnancy topics, mentions abortion, lactation kink, jealousy, drinking
Length: 3600 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader
Aim for the Sky masterlist. This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order.
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If you weren't pregnant and exhausted, Bradley would have been concerned by how quiet you were. You seemed to need a nap as soon as you got home from work, and then you wanted to go to bed right after Rose went down in her crib each evening. When he got home quite late on Friday after working on some transfer paperwork for several hours, he was surprised to find that you seemed a little more upbeat than usual.
"Hey, Roo."
You were wearing a pair of his gym shorts while you made dinner. The house smelled delicious, and his stomach started growling as soon as he walked inside. He picked Rose up from her playmat, taking her into the kitchen as he smothered her in kisses before transferring them to you.
"You feeling okay? How's Nugget Part Deux?"
"We're exhausted. Rose is the only one with energy right now."
He supposed that was better than you telling him you couldn't stop throwing up. So far, baby number two seemed to be giving you less grief when it came to eating. "We can nap all weekend," he promised. "How was your day?"
"Pretty good," you told him with a shrug. "How was your day?"
He glanced out the back door at the enormous jungle gym, eyeing it up as an option for him and Rose to play after dinner. "Just busy. Everyone keeps me on my toes all day long. These pilots are really talented."
You seemed to wrinkle your nose at his words, staring at the food cooking on the stove as you muttered, "I'll bet they are."
Rose seemed keen on the idea of the backyard, so he kissed her soft cheek. "Yeah, I can barely keep up with them in the air, but don't tell them that. I've got my head on a swivel the whole time. Indigo and Rex nearly took me out today, and I had to go into a dive. And starting on Monday, I'm going to give myself some extra office hours to stay on top of my paperwork."
Instead of responding about his day, you started to dish out the food onto two plates with your back turned to him. "After we eat, I need to call my parents before it's too late. They're putting their house on the market next week, and I think I'm just going to tell them I'm pregnant and get it over with. I've put it off long enough."
Bradley's brow creased. "They'll be excited though. Right? I mean, maybe not as excited as me, but still excited."
You shrugged again, and he thought he might lose his mind if you kept doing it. "Aren't you at least a little worried there could be some sort of complications from having them so close together?"
A sardonic laugh almost burst from his lips. "Baby Girl, I worry about you and Rosie and the new baby constantly. Okay? Nonstop. But we can't go back now. You're already almost in the second trimester. Hey," he said, swallowing hard as you finally turned and looked at him. He held Rose just a little tighter as he whispered, "We're married. We're happy, right? You're not actually thinking about ending your pregnancy, are you?"
"No," you replied quickly, shaking your head. Bradley desperately wanted to know if there was some way he could make this easier for you, because he didn't want you to resent what was happening. But you just started crying as you shrugged again. "I just feel like our timing is terrible. And I know I have to start telling people, because I'm already showing a little bit, but I'm just so frustrated, Bradley."
He never dreamed the two of you would go from trying for months to get pregnant with Rose to being frustrated about a second pregnancy, but here you were. "I realize you've got to do most of the work right now, but when I tell you that I want another baby and that I'm excited about this, I mean it."
"I know!" you whispered quickly. "I know." You swiped at your tears before wrapping your arms around him and Rose.
"Is something else bothering you?" he murmured when your cheek came to rest on his bicep. He couldn't imagine what else could be the matter, but he needed to make sure. 
You were silent for a few beats before whispering, "I'm fine. Let's facetime my parents."
For how excited your mom was to move to California, she didn't seem to notice that your eyes looked like you'd been crying. She kept talking about selling their furniture and packing everything up. She mentioned how much she wanted to see Rose in person as she fussed over her on the video call. Just as she was starting to discuss their new house in Coronado that would make them his neighbors, Bradley heard you blurt out, "I'm pregnant."
Your parents both looked stunned on the other end of the call. "You're pregnant," your mom said, eyes drifting back to Rose in Bradley's arms. "Already?"
Now both parents were staring at Bradley as he said, "Yeah... due in April."
"April Fool's Day," you said softly.
Your parents broke out into twin grins. "I'm assuming this was a surprise to the two of you?" your dad asked. When you nodded silently, he added, "A happy surprise at least! Congratulations. You're about to have your hands very full."
"It's a good thing we're moving!" your mom practically shrieked. "Two under two! Two babies! What if you have twins?"
"We're not," Bradley replied. Then he froze. "It's not twins. Right, Sweetheart?" Now he was a little scared as you turned to look at him and laugh.
"There was just one heartbeat, Roo. Just one."
His shoulders sagged in relief. "I mean, the more the merrier, but that would be a lot."
He let Rose nap against his chest while he rubbed circles against your lower back, and soon enough, your parents were ending the call with the promise that they would be in Coronado for Christmas. "We'll either be living there by then or we'll fly out for the holiday if our house here hasn't sold yet."
Everything sounded good to Bradley, and five minutes after the call ended, you fell asleep on him, too.
----------------------------
When you fell asleep on Cam's shoulder at brunch on Sunday, you figured it was time to tell him and Maria what was going on.
"I'm pregnant. Again."
Maria jumped out of her seat to cram into the opposite of the booth, sandwiching you between her and Cam. "Damn, girl! You've wasted no time!"
"Lieutenant Commander Mustache is working with some high fucking quality goods, huh?" Cam marveled, shaking his head slowly in reverence. "Congratulations."
"Thanks," you whispered, voice harsh and near tears. You had no control over your emotions. This was just like when you were pregnant with Rose, but with less vomiting and more fatigue. Everything made you upset enough that you wanted to cry or angry enough that you wanted to kick down a door. Including your husband.
You answered Cam and Maria's questions as you thought about that woman you'd seen around base with Bradley a few times. They were never alone, always part of a larger group, but you didn't like how she looked at him. And you didn't want to mention it to him, because you knew how ridiculous it was going to sound.
"Hey, I'm really tired," you eventually told your friends. "Do this again in two weeks?" You wanted to go home and nap while Bradley still had Rose out for a walk along the beach. You just wanted to be alone.
"Of course," Maria promised. "I'll text Bob to come pick me up, but you two can go on ahead."
"I'll wait with you," Cam told her, giving you a kiss on the cheek.
You made your way out and went home, leaning against the front door in relief when you found the house completely empty. Even Tramp and his yellow leash were gone. You ran to bed, curled up under the covers, and cradled your hand against your belly. It was impossible to tell if you had a baby bump, or if you were still chubby from last time. 
Your thumb ran along the top of your leggings as you started to cry. You needed to pull yourself together. Did you cry this much with Rose? Did everything make you feel like you looked disgusting? Eventually you dozed for about an hour before the sound of the front door closing jolted you awake. Rose started screaming, probably hungry after being out for so long. You rolled out of bed, avoiding your reflection in the mirror at all costs, and went to meet them in the kitchen.
Bradley was trying to bounce Rose to keep her quiet, but you yanked your shirt off and reached for her. "Sorry," he muttered as your daughter latched on to eat as soon as she was touching you. "I tried."
"It's okay." 
You fed one baby while you considered that her younger sibling was growing inside you, and for once, you couldn't figure out if you wanted to laugh or cry. 
While she ate, Bradley looked at his phone and groaned. "Nat wants us to go to the Hard Deck tonight."
The idea of going out and pretending that you were drinking alcohol was too much to handle. Even if you could find someone to watch Rose, it didn't sound like a fun time.
"You go," you told him.
He glanced up and said, "I don't want to go without you."
A smile graced your lips as you told him, "Just go for one drink with your best friend. I'll drop you off and pick you up. You can tell her I'm pregnant if you want to."
"Really?" he asked, perking up like Tramp did when presented with a treat.
"Yeah. I told Maria and Cam earlier. I actually fell asleep on his shoulder in the booth, and when I woke up, they were both gaping at me. I figured I needed to say something."
Bradley snorted. "What did they have to say about Bradshaw Baby number two?"
"Cam is under the impression that you are working with some high quality equipment."
He burst into laughter. "I mean..."
You rolled your eyes as Rose switched to your other side. It was easy to feel better about things when it was just the three of you at home. You looked at your husband as he ate an apple in four bites and convinced yourself he would never do anything to hurt you. Then he drank half a beer and belched while he adjusted his junk, and you thought perhaps nobody else would want to deal with him anyway.
"I'll text Nat back. Then I'll pull the weeds around the playset while I decide what I'm doing about the bar."
You let Rose take a nap, but now that you'd also had one, you felt a little restless. Even after you did a few chores, including looking at items for a second baby nursery online, you wanted to get out of the house again. When Bradley came inside, stripping his sweaty shirt over his head, he said, "One drink. Don't leave me there too long, okay?"
"Is Jake going, too? Maybe I'll see if Cat and Jer are home and want visitors."
"That's a great idea," he replied, taking your hand when he walked past. When he gave you a little tug, you didn't move. "You coming?" he asked, clearly puzzled. 
"Where?"
"What do you mean where?" he scoffed, tugging again. "To take a shower with me while Rose naps. Where else?"
It was hard to think about anything when your husband was on his knees in front of you, steamy water swirling around his tattooed bicep while his hands pinned you to the tile wall. But it was especially hard to focus on anything other than the feel of his mouth on your body. The scrape of his mustache. The pull of his lips. Soft and demanding and needy.
"Roo," you gasped, lungs full of the humid air, sucking in deep breaths as he looked up at you.
"God, Baby Girl," he rasped, thumb teasing your dainty rooster tattoo. "I'm so spoiled. Your tits look so pretty, and your belly will be big again soon."
You let your fingers drag through his wet curls, pushing them back from his forehead while he kissed the spot where you felt so tender as the baby grew.
"Roo!" you gasped, your hands both flying to your belly. "The baby! I can feel the baby moving!"
"Shit, really?"
His eyes were wide, alert with anticipation as you moved his palm to the spot where you could feel squirming. He eased himself closer on his knees, the shower hitting both of you with warm spray while he let you guide him. You felt it again, just another squirm as you pressed his palm harder to your belly.
"Right there," you whispered, and he closed his eyes. Your heart beat in your ears, an undeniably excited rhythm.
"I can't wait to feel it, too," he murmured, his cheek coming to rest against his hand. "You couldn't feel Rose this early."
"No," you agreed, watching your husband fall even more in love with the unborn baby. "Maybe another week or two and they'll be big enough for you to feel it." You played with his hair, letting him stay put until the water started to get cold.
-------------------------------
"I'll pick you up in a little while," you informed Bradley when you pulled into the parking lot at the Hard Deck. "Jake is already here, so I'll take Rose to hang out with Cat and Jer for a bit."
"Sounds good." He kissed you before unbuckling and leaning into the backseat to kiss his daughter. He was still shocked and in a mild daze over the baby moving during the shower. He wanted to feel those kicks against his palm, and now he'd be all over you in the upcoming weeks, looking for his chance. 
"Have fun," you called before pulling away in your Bronco, but going to the bar to hang out without you was not his idea of a great night. He decided he'd just wait and see how the evening progressed before making a decision about telling Nat about the pregnancy. He smiled as he wondered how long it would be until you had to start wearing the maternity tent to work again.
"There you are!" shouted Nat when he walked past the bar, waving to Penny. "We're about to play pairs. You're with Hangman. Rack 'em, Rooster."
Bradley sighed and took the pool cue as she thrust it into his hand. "Can't I get a beer first?"
She turned and shouted, "Hey, Coyote! Get Rooster one!"
Javy saluted him from the bar as Bradley nodded and settled in to start the game. He and Jake wouldn't even have to try too hard to beat Nat and Reuben, but as he got into the groove of things, he realized he was having a pretty good time.
"You want another?" Jake asked him, and soon one beer turned into three. Bradley ended up buying the fourth round for his friends when Mickey arrived. He had enough in his system to not give a shit when Jake started ribbing on him for his new position at work.
"The way your students all jump to attention when they see you has got to be the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life," he drawled, and Bradley nudged his foot, making him miss his shot.
"I'm still in shock that Cat agreed to marry you," Bradley replied before taking a sip of beer.
Jake rolled his eyes. "I'm surprised Angel let you get her pregnant. Shocked the baby didn't come out with a mustache."
Nat was cackling while Bradley snorted. "She's pregnant again." The words slipped out, but they felt too fucking good on his tongue, just like your body had in the shower.
"What?!"
He was instantly surrounded by his friends while Nat wrapped him up in a hug. "Are you serious? Another one so soon?" she asked with a suspicious looking smirk.
"Yeah," he replied, letting her squeeze him until he thought she might displace a rib. "Apparently I'm working with some high quality equipment."
"Ew!" Nat shrieked, letting go of him while Jake shook his hand. 
"Poor Angel," he drawled. "She'll have another little Bradshaw on the loose soon."
"Whiskey shots on me," Reuben said, slapping Bradley hard on the back.
"Thanks, man," he replied while conversation about the baby settled to a normal volume. He drank his shot of whiskey, and that's when he realized he was actually kind of drunk.
The game of pool wore on, but nobody seemed to be keeping track of who won. So he kept going until his phone vibrated in his jeans pocket.
Baby Girl Bradshaw: I'm almost there. Rose fell asleep.
"I have to run," Bradley announced, dropping his cue into Jake's hand. 
"You're so fucking whipped," Jake drawled. "Get out of here and knock your wife up again.... oh, wait."
Bradley gave him and everyone else double middle fingers behind his back as he walked toward the exit. He was tired and warm and buzzed, and he wanted to curl up next to you in bed and kiss the back of your neck. And maybe you'd let him look at your gorgeous tits. Maybe if he was really good, you'd let him taste you. The evening air hit his body, igniting so much need in him.
"Oh, sorry," he grunted, nearly plowing over someone in his rush to get to the parking lot.
"Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw," came a now familiar voice. Blue eyes flashed up at him along with a smile that kept growing.
Indigo was dressed in street clothes, but he tried not to take notice as he nodded. "I knew you'd find The Hard Deck without my help."
She laughed, bright and clear as he tried to step past her. "Don't tell me you're leaving for the night."
A little pout found her lips, and Bradley nodded. "Yeah. It's getting late for a Sunday."
"Come on," she whined, the back of her hand brushing his as he made his way around her. "Let me buy you one drink."
His mind was still gooey with thoughts of taking you to bed as he shook his head. "Thanks, but I really need to go. Enjoy your night."
Then Nat burst through the door, movements slowing when she met his eyes. "You left your phone on the pool table." She tossed it to him, coordination pretty good for how much she'd had to drink. She started backing up toward the door as she said, "You better go home with your pregnant wife!"
Bradley smiled at his friend, but he could feel Indigo's eyes on him as he stepped off the deck toward the parking lot. And there you were, standing in the first aisle with your back against the red Bronco. Your lips were set in a firm line, and Bradley was about to make it his personal mission to kiss away that expression.
------------------------------
That younger woman was here with him. You'd seen her around base plenty of times lately, but now she was here. At the Hard Deck. At your favorite bar in your neighborhood. She was with your husband at the bar. They were already standing there together when you drove up and parked.
"Who is that woman?" you snapped at Bradley who was clearly drunk. His hands were all over your waist and hips as soon as he reached you.
"Hey, Sweetheart." His voice was deep and sexy, and you wanted nothing more than to melt into him, but she was still staring you down.
"Who. Is. She?" you hissed, your eyes starting to burn with unshed tears as you stared back. Bradley was kissing your neck now as the woman finally turned and went inside the bar. You already knew who she was. You were sure of it. You'd heard him use her call sign countless times, but you wanted him to say it now. "Bradley!"
"Huh?" he grunted, meeting your eyes.
"Who is that woman you were just with?"
"Natasha?" he asked, and you wanted to scream.
"The other woman, Bradley."
"Oh. That's Indigo."
Your heart sank as soon as he confirmed it for you, but he didn't seem to notice or care that you suddenly felt like your skin was on fire. That woman who was still so fresh out of flight school was already a top pilot, and she was beautiful, and she wanted your husband.
"Baby Girl," he moaned next to your ear. "Let's go home. Maybe we can get in bed and snuggle while I try to feel the baby move? Or you could let me finish what we started in the shower? I'm already so wound up."
You opened the passenger side door for him, slamming it shut as soon as he was inside. You glared at the entrance to the Hard Deck before heading around the Bronco to drive him home.
-----------------------------
Either way, it still looks bad, Bradley. We are riding along with all of BG's emotions, and it's a lot to handle. Thanks for reading. More coming soon. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 32
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