#even if it is only a single day. well actually it cant be tomorrow i have to vaccum and do a water change for alpen

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

[princessmyriad]

In other news ive channelled the recent bout of insomnia into making stock at 1am instead of playing zelda and ohh boy im fucken excited to make a noodle soup with it tomorrow for lunch 😋🧅

[anzuhan]

Hello! I'm new to your account but I just want to say your art is suuuuupper pretty! I want to know Anzu's lore, have you written it down anywhere or have discussed it with a previous ask yet?

hello, thank you and glad you asked 🫶 anzu never really speaks about anzu's lore because its overly complex and anzu wouldve wanted to save it for later for when anzu could actually pursue vtuber & idol activities, however its been 4 years and anzu still couldnt really. manage to do that. so anzu will talk about it now 👍 ^ _^)👍

anzu just hopes youre ready for a VERY long post (under cut because. otherwise itll be a post the length of do you like the color of the sky and dont wanna take up peoples dashes 😭)

so based on anzu's current design you'd probably think anzu is a vampire. which isnt entirely wrong but also. WRONG !! you see, anzu isn't from this world, universe, dimension, what have you. anzu comes from a very distant place in its own right that cannot exactly be entered, not even by anzu anymore due to how anzu was exiled from it. 'us' that live there are not entirely a species that is documented by the ones here, so anzu cant exactly tell you what anzu is, but the closest word to it of the inhabitants of this world would be probably close enough to shapeshifter; anzu doesnt exactly fit all characteristics of one, but that is still the best word youve all got for it ! anzu in a way also works like a candle, though anzu isnt made from wax or anything of the like (´ﾉω；`) anzu's insides are hollow and anzu's 'life' is given by a flame inside of anzu's body. it is closer enough to the fire that exists in this world, but also not entirely due to how it can hardly go out. back in anzu's 'world' we all lived under something close to a high governance of 'elders', but anzu would also compare it close to what people tend to call cults here. anzu did not like it, and though its painted as bad to be kicked out of that realm, anzu is kind of happy to have gone out ☆

anzu was also lucky enough to come across another of anzu's kind in the first world anzu was thrown into after the exile that could teach anzu how everything works. we are not exactly built for battle, though maybe sadly for anzu, anzu loves combat </3 our kind can go through dimensions, time and space at will, so we do not exactly age the same as humans. anzu could be 99308 one day and then 193993 the next one ! if anzu did some time skips or dimension skips or what have you. anzu has also given up trying to keep track of anzu's age, though last time anzu's checked, it was around 102000s (this may become invalid even by tomorrow)

the way we see things are as all stories, tales and also things far unknown beyond your imagination are their own dimension; dimensions are split into timelines; there is always a main timeline that shouldnt be interfered with, the one that you may call 'the one with the given fate', where all things go as they should, whether that be bad or not. and then after this one, theres thousands of subtimelines where minor changes have happened in everyones lives; anzu is free to go and disrupt those with anzu's own ideas of how things shouldve went~ truth to be told, anzu tends to become attached a ton to the ones that have sealed fates that cannot be changed.. well. almost, until anzu'd come in, of course ! and sometimes anzu cant help it but want to interfere. to how dimensions also work, a copy of every single person existing in said dimension exists in every copy of the main timeline; though, because anzu does not belong to any dimensions anzu goes thru, there can only be one anzu at a time anywhere.

anzu, across time and looking over all tons of different universes, has fallen in love with idols in each and every one of them. so anzu's quest is to end up becoming an idol in every dimension anzu goes to ! all different looks of anzu you see also tend to be so that anzu can fit in better here or there ... though despite anzu's spent so long among humans from so many different dimensions, anzu still struggles to understand some pretty simple things sometimes. either way, because anzu wants to be not only just any kind of idol but a cosplayer idol as well (i.e like fuyume hanamura from enst), its also good to have huge variety, right? ♡

this is what anzu looks like normally, anzu usually refers to this as 'default' or just 'sumika', given that was the name anzu chose when anzu had come onto a dimension outside of anzu's own. you may see it from time to time, and they may not always look identical but anzu thinks its pretty usual to spot in most drawings whenever it is the 'default' !

among the usual white holographic hair and the usual characteristics, anzu's also had blonde hair for a while ... anzu does not really like to act as an idol like this, but anzu does that.. sometimes ! and for the blonde times, it was more a case of spicing things up.. ?

those are also just a very small portion of what anzu's 'default' looks like. below is a much much larger strip of looks, though not updated.

okay ! now that we've established that that is, what a normal person would probably call anzu's 'natural' look, next are two charts of anzu's looks anzu used to use and that anzu still uses sometimes ! you see there far more often than the default, due to the fact that anzu prefers to perform idol work and activities through them. the default from before is more of a personal and casual thing(＞＜*)ノ~~~~~

(x next to the name means they do not get used anymore; checkmark means they still get used; the time below the name in paranthesis refers to when they were initially active)

though they all have a bit of a different personality and characteristics, theyre still all anzu ! anzu is anzu no matter what anzu looks like, so please dont forget that☆ if you wish to know more about any in particular, or want to see more art of either, feel free to send a further ask about it ! theres tons of arts of every single one of them.

anzu had also not described every single little thing about anzu's backstory or things anzu is capable of, tales of things thatve happened in this or that time/space/dimension/etc ; so if you have anymore questions about any and all of them please ask as well ! anzu is happy if youre interested in anzu♡

[what-if-nct]

HI TODAY'S REMINDER IS PHANTOM!!!!! ok strap in this is gonna go on for a bit

1. the OPULENCE. the DIAMONDS, the chandeliers, the beating heart tied up in golden chains god it was a visual feast and that's before I've even gotten to the members, which

2. THEY LOOK SO FUCKING GOOD. Hendery??? Xiaojun????? Kun with those fucking red contacts staring straight into my soul???????? there's so many to pick from but the black outfits? yummy. all of them all at once please

3. the SONG omg i missed wayv title tracks so muchhhhhhhhhhh ughhh i love how grandiose it sounds while still being so current which tbh is a line wayv title tracks always ride perfectly (people say kickback wasn't all that and yeah it's not my favourite but it's still really fucking good). also WHEN did Winwin's voice get that deep??? and Hendery, sir? Yangyang at least warned us in rain day, but the other two… once again: yummy

4. I'm sure someone smarter than me will analyse the music video properly and tell me what's actually going on but the one thing i did notice was the set with the black outfits changing in the second half with the chandelier falling and the statues broken and the ground falling in and I'm sure that means something but my brain could only focus on how fucking hot i find them dancing among ruin

5. they're… they're actually back. like for real for real. like there's a song and an album (which i will listen to tomorrow but I'm v much looking forward to). there was a stage? which by the way. also extremely hot. i love how much puppet imagery there is in the choreo, it ties in very well with what little i understood of the lyrics. which, don't get me wrong, i love their music, but their lyrics do read a lot like a theology comprehension text and I'm not always up to the task.

i just. fucking love them so much. and this song. I've been falling off nct slowly these past few months but… they really just proved why they were the unit that got me hooked in the first place. can you believe we survived the drought? we really made it all the way through. good job us

Hiii, I've said this before and I'll say this again out of all of the NCT universes Wayv gets the absolute best styling,concepts, and songs. Nothing against dream or 127 I love them all equally but Wayv has had way less misses with title tracks then 127. I just cant accept 2baddies. I can't. It has not grown on me.

But seriously they look amazing it's still giving Vampire princes and I love it. And the song like it sounds like a Wayv song but kind of matured and refined in a way. Yangyang's voice surprised me but luckily we found out he has the range and I love when he switches it back to his natural voice. And Hendery and Winwin normally have deep voices but like it sounded so much deeper I could feel it in the depths of my uterus. And only Felix's rap in victory song has ever done that. Like it just was so good then Xiaojun and Ten off setting the depth with their higher voices and Xiaojun's high notes will always hit the spot every single time and Kun's mid tempo voice kind of melds it all together. Like they finally returned to us after years they've done it.

No I feel you with Stray Kids pulling me by my ankles I also felt myself slipping from NCT but Wayv really just came in and was like not on our watch. And I can't wait to see them promote fully after two years. They deserve all of our love and support. Now to listen to the album while shopping for lingerie because what else are you supposed to do while listening to a Wayv album

[goblin-enjoyer]

why must twitter be my main source for meme harvesting. so much doom scrolling, i get why but also i kind of wish I could get some relief from it all before the big day. Like either way its gonna be worse tomorrow I just want some nice funny memes,jokes and posts in general. It doesn't help that I have no clue on how to vote in the slightest, like it seems like its handwriting stuff, but also fill in the dots?? From what i can gather from vaguely worded garbo commercials that constantly air it seems like its formatted as "question [NUMBER] yes or no" without much actual detail on the specifics of the question. I wouldn't know because literally everything i see seems to contradict each other! How in the world is a git with little to no political knowledge supposed to figure this out?? Everytime I see anything on the voting process it always seems almost intended to not make any sense on purpose! Its always discussed online about policies and how to get your vote to the right place (which its important! very much so, i am not downplaying the import of that) not on the actual format of the voting pamphlet-thing! I don't even know what form it takes! Is it a MCAS style giga packet? Is it a single sheet of paper with bubbles to fill in? is it threw a machine? is it something you have to get printed and mail out or is it something i could just find online and put my ID into? I JUST GOT MY ID LITERALLY ONLY A FEW MONTHS AGO. I swear it feels like I wasn't supposed to progress as a person this far and the universe just gave up with my character progression after the final school arc. like it was support to be another few month hiatus before the next school arc started back up but it got delayed so far that nobody knows if its still coming or just cancelled so its in a limbo of minor basic arcs about a background side character the writers never planned on having a story for. so they never put any motivations for them and just had them be a school setting only character. no extended roster of interactions with other more well written characters that build up both characters arcs. no bothering with writing in skills that all the other characters earn, why bother this character isn't meant to go past this series, no use in having to write explanations for knowing how to drive or having a job. ugh this post is deteriorating, why must the only way to explain how i feel about my life sometimes be through media tropes and crap. while i'm happier with my life now and enjoy living as i do, there's nothing really for me. I can't drive as i suck with directions and am afraid i can't handle all the buttons and rules all while dealing with other drivers while going around in a death fast metal box fuelled by explosions, i'm not built for having any conventional job as im too autistic (to put it simply) to or weak/low energy to be doing stuff like that. I have no motivation to do anything, I cant even ask my dad for a SITUATIONAL raise on my maybe 20 dollars a week allowance. it feels like my life wasn't supposed to get this far. i feel like a useless pile of biomass rotting around stale while everyone who knows me slowly loses hope in me amounting to anything. my parents know it,my friends know it, my younger brother is the only one foolish enough to still seem to me like they have hope in my future. he has been pushing me to vote on his behalf as he cant vote yet and that's been putting on so much pressure on me to get everything right that I just slink away and compress and wrap around myself in what feels like a dark corner of being. everything feels bad because I want to vote somewhat, my closest compatriots are LGBTQ+ i am a autistic person! I should be voting against the tigers eat your face party! but i just can't, it feels like the weight of deep sea pressure on me making me unable to move. it feels awful, i can't even do this one basic thing that everyone else can, why do i even still exist? Maybe young me was right, maybe i was meant to die before adulthood.

[lightadarttomendyourheart]

i am so in love with my new flat. it's everything i've ever wanted.

i cant believe i'm finally here in calgary. in my own place. everything seems to be falling into place so perfectly. i love my new job. i love my flat. i love the location, it'll take me 15-20 mins to walk to work. i love that it's west facing, i get so much gorgeous evening sun and i have a clear view of the sunset. it's insane. i can't believe it. i really cannot believe how well my life is going right now.

getting laid off and then breaking up with jake were honestly the best things that could have happened to me. the layoff was such a blessing in disguise. and then having that time to organize my move to calgary. it was serendipitous.

i'm so fucking happy. this flat was so worth the 3 month wait. i wanna live here FOREVER LOL. but actually. i've been very much a hermit since i've moved in cause there is just so much to do at home and i'm obsessed with it. but i do need to go out and go for walks and explore what's around me and go fricken grocery shopping, i've really been putting that off. but i have so much to unpack and organize and ive also been so exhausted. ive had to force myself to leave to go get something to eat it's bad lmao. but tomorrow maybe i'll go grocery shopping before indy comes over. even though i'm so exhausted and running on fumes i'm so wired. i want this place to be perfect and i want to start organizing and making it mine right away. i can't live another day in a home that isn't me. i did that for almost 2 years with jake and i'm over it.

god i am just in such a fucking good place. i hope this never ends. i dont remember the last time i was this happy. especially with my home AND my work AND being single. it's wild. i feel like i'm starting a bit late but it's never too late to be happy and figure out what you want in life. i'm gonna be a fucking old ass mom i just know it. even thinking about having kids right now is terrifying and makes me anxious. i dont want them. not yet. not for a long time. i need to enjoy this part of my life. and if that means i have my first at 35, which is only 7 years away, that seems long enough. 5 seems too soon. but 7, i can work with.

i need to live more in the moment. stop spending all my days at home playing games and watching shows. but i know with indy and sarah so close to me now, i will. we're going to have the fricken best summer. 2023, baby. 28. THIS IS MY YEAR.

[kirishwima]

lmaooo what a bitch

[slaygentford]

I listened to every Beatles album in order so you dont have to and kept this record as I did. no one asked me to do this and honestly idk how I arrived at it it just sounded interesting after I exhausted the platters who I didnt think to record like this. also im at the point of school where you dont get homework anymore and I miss it so I made a report.

these are graded on a curve, that is, the ratings of each album are calculated in relation to the other albums. prior to this endeavor I had only heard the big beatles songs like in movies and on Wii rockband.

please please me: 3/5. highlight: twist and shout (sorry). lowlight: baby its you. thready ass vocals. leave it to people with talent with the beatles: 3/5. aesthetically identical to prev. highlight: you really got a hold on me. lowlight: please mr postman. why the fuck would you cover this. youre signing up to fail a hard day's night: 2/5. highlight: things we said today. lowlight: sadly, a hard day's night beatles for sale: im gonna keep it real. this sounds identical to albums 1-3 to me and I feel exactly no emotion about it at all. largely inoffensive. 2/5 help!: 3.3/5. highlight: help! killer bass. lowlight: the riff in I need you fills me with a burning, indescribable rage rubber soul: here we begin to experience the epic highs and lows of The Beatles discography. high highs: Norwegian wood and girl. low lows: literally everything else. 2/5 revolver: 3.5/5. these bitches finally woke up! highlight: I'm only sleeping, for no one, Eleanor Rigby is worth the hype, I want to tell you, tomorrow never knows. lowlight: dr robert -- flop attempt at satire. also whatever that one guy was doing to that poor sitar sgt pepper's: I came to a rude awakening when I realized that the wall would not exist without sgt pepper's. humbling. that being said, 0/5. I hated every single second of this. magical mystery tour: epic high following last album's epic low. 5/5. strawberry fields has a BASS DROP??!?!? no skips. I love this album. its such a time capsule as well of like one of the weirdest years in history. i can listen to this album and experience how my parents felt at 16. the callback to she loves you on the last track. I get it the white album: I dont get it. this album tested me like nothing else. I began to flag. I began to question the honor of my quest. I almost shut it off after nearly every song. but let me say: the highs are sweeping. SWEEPING. happiness is a warm gun. blackbird, Helter Skelter, while my guitar gently weeps, back in the ussr, revolution (which is satire which I just realized)... however, the lows are LOW. glass onion is bad; Julia is actually unlistenable (I broke and skipped it); wild honey pie is like getting a transorbital lobotomy; birthday has undone years of my therapist's work vis a vis suicidal ideation. Im so baffled by this I almost want to exclude it entirely. instead I calculated its good song to bad song ratio which landed the album as a whole at a solid D+ (69%)! but that seems like its ignoring the good songs which for any other band even ONE of those would be the song of their career. emotionally the experience was not unlike a bipolar mixed episode. 1/5 yellow submarine: this one was a movie soundtrack. something it has going for it is that it isn't the white album. 4/5 abbey road: yeah. 10/5. I cant even be flippant about this. you live a whole lifetime listening to this one. fine. let it be: set myself up to FAIL with this one. my dad was about to turn 18 the year this came out, which I only bring up because this is the only one of my dads beatles albums I kept. so of course I listened to the record and cried through let it be like a bitch. I like all the studio talking noise. 5/5 for sentimentality

rating overall: 43.8/65, about 66%. but I dont vibe w that honestly. I had a great time doing this and discovered some great music. I also cant ignore their historical significance and the insight it gave me into my parents' youth, which is probably the most interesting thing about the beatles. I choose to recuse myself from assigning a grade and instead, on a pass/fail scale, pass them.

reflection: they were so prolific in 10 years with wildly varying results, but it makes me feel like we need to all create more haphazardly and throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks instead of being so precious about it. because honestly, a monkey at a typewriter with that kind of output WILL eventually write something good. I also think it's the kill baby Mussolini principle in that even if you killed baby Mussolini there would still be the sociopolitical situation which gave rise to Mussolini. so if The Beatles never formed there would've been other band/s who evolved with the upheaval of the 60s who would now serve as this cultural touchstone. but this is what we got and thats quite interesting I think.

takeaway: I cant listen to another beatles song for at least 2 calendar years

[vendetta-if]

okey, okey, i was just chilling, reading chapter two (a really master piece, like always) and... its just a silly thought but for example:

mini spoileeer:

«The volume of his voice drops a notch softer and you involuntarily strain your ear to try and catch what he's saying. You can't help it, okay? You're curious. "Okay… We're still down for tomorrow night, right? Promise you won't stand me up again like last time?" You catch Uncle Luka's lips tugging up slightly in a smirk. "Okay, okay. I'm just teasing you. So, you want me to pick you up or…" Another beat of pause. "Alright. Well, it's a date then," he chuckles before saying goodbye and hanging up the call. He then turns to you, a small smile still gracing his lips. "Sorry about the wait. It was a pretty important phone call." »

In this scene I feel so good and the same time so protective towards uncle Luka that I was impressed myself, like, Jakal, dear, bro, if you ever EVER do ANYTHING wrong to Luka, if I found out you answered or even looked at him bad, I will become the heir of the family only to go after you. Luka deserves the best of the best and I won't settle for less 7.7r

I mean, just how I say early, it is a little silly, and I was been able to write this piece of post only with this little quote, but Luka just give a wave of sweetness and protectiveness and I cant help myself to feel this way lol

Aww 🥰 I’m glad and overwhelmed by all the Luka-love you guys are pouring out 🥺😭

I know I definitely have to give a chance for MC to give Jackal a shovel talk and maybe pester him with some sweet domestic questions 😂

Luka is also definitely one of the characters that I enjoy writing along with Viktor and small MC and small Ash ☺️ I hope to be able to write some short stories and/or snippets with Luka and Jackal in them in the future 😄

Poor Luka, MC actually feared that he would be single for the rest of his life because he was too busy and focused on raising them and Ash while also taking care of our family’s business 😭 Just imagine, being Luka, shifting from one day being a free bachelor in your early 30s to suddenly become basically a single dad for his niece/nephew/nibling in a night and not long after that, taking in another child, Ash 😭😭

[marauders-venting]

Pardon My French

pairing: wolfstar (sirius x remus)

genre: fluff

warnings: none

words: 3556

note: thank you to @ probably_wizardingworld_artist on instagram for helping me translate things into french. also i got some of the lines that sirius says from this website https://www.fluentu.com/blog/french/french-pick-up-lines/

a/n: if you dont speak french (like me) dont look up a translation! everything will be clear by the end of the fic and its more fun if you find out along with remus. i mean, i cant really stop you if you want to translate the sentences but thats just my advice :)

Remus was sitting in the library, a French to English dictionary open on his lap, sighing in frustration as he flipped through the pages. For the past couple of weeks, Sirius had taken to murmuring things in French under his breath and it drove Remus crazy that he didn’t know what they meant. He had asked Sirius on several occasions but Sirius always refused to tell him. But the fact that he didn’t understand the words wasn’t the only reason it drove him crazy when Sirius spoke French. It’s not Remus’ fault that Sirius sounds really hot when his lips curve around the words in “the language of love”.

Remus tries not to think about it but it’s becoming increasingly more difficult because every time they’re alone together Sirius seems to find something to say in French (if only to piss Remus off).

The last time Sirius had said something in French to him had been last weekend. It was the first sunny weekend since the winter and Marlene had suggested that they all go down to the lake for a swim.

Remus’ brain could barely form a single coherent thought from the moment Sirius took off his shirt; he was too busy trying not to stare. He remembered jumping into the lake and trying to get warm by swimming to the far side, away from all his friends. Sirius had followed him to make sure he was okay.

“I’m fine,” he had said, smiling slightly at Sirius. “Just cold.”

“Oh okay,” Sirius said, looking relieved. He had glanced back at their friends before whispering, “On devrait t’arrêter pour excès de beauté sur la voie publique” and submerging his head in the water and swimming back to James, Peter, Lily, Marlene, Dorcas, Mary and Alice. Remus had felt a shiver down his spine that had nothing to do with the cold.

Then there was the time that Sirius had skipped Quidditch practice to visit Remus in the hospital wing after a particularly bad full moon. James, being the captain, had been able to delay the practice so that he and Peter could come to visit as well but they had to practice for the game the following day. James had to be at the practice because he was the captain and Peter had to be there because they didn’t have another Keeper to fill in. But James had given Sirius permission to stay with Remus (which showed just how terrible he felt that he couldn’t stay as well). They watched a bit of the practice from the hospital wing but Remus was getting frustrated, having to stay in a hospital bed for so long. So, after clearing it with Madam Pomfrey, Sirius helped Remus climb all the way to the Astronomy Tower. They sat up there watching the sunset when Sirius said, “Il y a tellement de soleil dans tes yeux que je bronze quand tu me regardes.”

“Ugh, do you make it your life goal to patronize me?” Remus had said.

“Of course, Moony, what else would I live for?”

“Are you ever going to stop doing that?” he asked.

“Probably not,” Sirius had replied, grinning at him. “It’s too much fun.”

“Why do you even bother?” Remus said. “You know I don’t understand a single word of what you’re saying. Why don’t you go talk to someone who speaks French?”

“Because then they’d know what I was saying,” Sirius replied simply. He had refused to answer any more of his questions.

Remus had needed to spend that night in the hospital wing again. All night, Sirius’ voice rang through his head but every time he tried to make something coherent of it, actually words or letters or even sounds, he couldn’t. He could never remember what Sirius had said long enough to actually look it up or ask anyone.

But lately, Remus had noticed that Sirius had been repeating the same sentence in French practically every day. He recognises the sound of the words in Sirius’ mouth.

So today, Remus waited until he was alone with Sirius, waited for Sirius to say what Remus knew he would. And when he did Remus repeated the words in his head a million times until he remembered them. And now Remus was in the library and looking up the words in a dictionary. 

He knew that he could’ve gone to Lily and asked her to translate it for him but he didn’t want to. He knows it’s stupid but he feels like this is something that Sirius is saying to him and only to him. Remus had never heard Sirius whisper in French to anyone else. And as much as Remus pretended to be annoyed by it, he actually liked that he had this with Sirius. He liked that they had something that was just their own. And even though it was probably nothing, he didn’t want to share it with Lily right now.

Chaque jour je tombe plus amoureux de toi. That was the sentence. Remus looked up each word individually and came to the conclusion that he must have heard wrong or maybe the words were spelt differently to how they were pronounced. Because there was no way in hell that Sirius had said these words to him. It was impossible. Right? Remus didn’t know. And he knew that the only way he could be sure was by asking Lily. He had asked Sirius a million times to no avail. And he needs to know what Sirius has been saying to him, especially now that there’s a chance… No, Remus tells himself, you just translated wrong. Don’t get your hopes up. So Remus gives in. He’d rather ask Lily and find out what Sirius has been saying to him every day for the last month than keep this to himself without even understanding it.

“Hey Lily,” he started, getting her attention. Remus had waited until the two of them were alone, just in case he had translated right. Which he hadn’t. He knows he translated it wrong. But he’d still rather nobody knew about it. “What does ‘chaque jour je tombe plus amoureux de toi’ mean?” He fumbled across the words a bit, hearing how terrible his pronunciation was. Lily looked at him, her eyebrows raised.

“Where on earth did you hear that sentence?” she asked.

“I read it somewhere,” Remus lied easily. “So what does it mean?”

“It means ‘every day, I fall more in love with you.’” Remus’ jaw dropped open. “Remus, who told you they’re in love with you?”

“What? Nobody! What makes you think someone said that to me?”

“You said that you read that sentence somewhere but if you had read it, you would have no idea how to pronounce it. Besides the look on your face when I told you what it means is more than enough. So who was it?”

“None of your business,” he said. “But y–you’re kidding, right? That’s not actually what it means. Right?”

“No, I’m not kidding, Rem. That’s what it means,” she replied, laughing at the look on his face. “Come on, tell me who it was.”

“No fucking way,” Remus said. “Besides, they’re probably joking. I mean… no, they’re definitely joking.” Lily shrugged.

“Just ask them,” she said. “And then you have to tell me who your secret admirer is.” She poked him in the side.

“Stooooop,” he said, jumping away from her and laughing against his will. “I’m going.” He got up and started walking away.

“Have fun with your mystery lover,” she called after him without looking back. Remus rolled his eyes but his mind was racing. So apparently he hadn’t been wrong. That was what Sirius had said to him. What does this even mean? He’s teasing you, said a voice in his head, like always. Sirius doesn’t love you. Not like that. But he said he does. Don’t be stupid. Sirius isn’t in love with you. He’s joking. Like always.

The next time Sirius said it, they were in the Room of Requirement. Sirius had ambushed Remus in the middle of his prefect rounds with Lily levitating a cardboard box in midair. Typical. He had practically given Remus a heart attack by interrupting his conversation with Lily, leaving Remus to wonder just how much of the conversation he had overheard.

“So have you talked to your mystery French lover yet?” Lily had teased. Remus groaned.

“No, I haven’t,” he said. “And I probably won’t.”

“Why not?” Lily demanded. “They’re being very romantic, Remus, you should at least appreciate their effort.”

“I’d appreciate it more if they’d just tell me what the fuck they want instead of sending me coded messages that they know I don’t understand,” Remus grumbled.

“Moonyyyyy,” Sirius said, coming up from behind him. Remus jumped, turning around, heart racing in his chest.

“Sirius? What are you doing here?” he asked. “You know it’s after hours, right?” Sirius snorted.

“Yes, Remus, I am fully aware of the fact that I’m breaking a school rule,” he said, smirking.

“Are you aware that technically Remus and I have to turn you in?” Lily said.

“Ah, but do you really plan on doing that, Evans?” Sirius asked.

“That depends,” she replied. “Why are you here?”

“Right,” Sirius remembered, then he turned to Remus. “James forgot to put this box with the rest of the stuff for tomorrow so I said I’d take it. And you’re coming with me.”

“Remind me why again?” Remus said.

“Moony, come on, don’t make me go alone. I’ll be lonely,” Sirius pouted.

“You are insufferable, did you know that?”

“And yet, you’ve tolerated me for 6 years now.”

“Yeah, the keyword there is ‘tolerated’,” Remus said, rolling his eyes. “Lils…” he started, turning to her.

“Nope,” she said before he could even ask. “No way. You are not leaving me to do these rounds alone because then I’ll die of boredom. So unless you want me to tell McGonagall that your planning something for tomorrow, you’re going to finish this floor with me and then I’ll go back to the common room and you can do whatever the fuck you want.”

“Evans…” Sirius pouted.

“Nope, that’s non-negotiable, Black. Also, do I want to ask?” She gestured to the hovering box.

“The less you know, the better,” he said. “Although, I would avoid the classrooms near the dungeons tomorrow if I were you.” She nodded and Remus thought he saw her smile slightly for a second.

“You go on, I’ll catch up,” he said to Sirius, knowing that Lily’s mind would not be changed. He couldn’t blame her. He wouldn’t have let her leave him to finish this chore alone either. She was right, it was painstakingly boring. Which is why he would much rather be with Sirius. But it was only fair that he finished tonight’s rounds with her; she did cover for him around the full moon, after all.

Sirius pouted but knew better than to argue and turned to go to the Room of Requirement. Remus watched him and he disappeared up a flight of stairs. Only then did he notice Lily was smirking at him.

“What?” he asked, sounding a bit defensive.

“So Sirius is your secret French admirer?” she said.

“W–What?” he spluttered. “What makes you think that?”

“Well, for one, the look on your face when he showed up right behind us while we were talking about your mystery lover,” Lily said. “It was the look people make when you’ve just been talking about someone and then they show up and you’re worried that they may have overheard you.”

“That… is a very specific look,” Remus said, avoiding the question she was asking.

“Then you smiled at him when you called him insufferable,” she said.

“So?”

“So it was one of those I’m-smiling-at-you-while-I’m-teasing-you-cause-I’m-secretly-in-love-with-you smiles.”

“Again, that's a very specific expression,” he said.

“Look, I know you like him, so will you just admit it already?”

“Why? What good would that information do you? It’s for me to worry about and for Sirius to never discover, ever.”

“Remus, you’re kidding, right?” she said. “Sirius literally told you that he loves you, in French no less.”

“Exactly, Lily. In French. If he actually meant it, why would he say it in a language that he knows I don’t understand? He just knew that I would look it up and he wanted to make some joke.”

“I really don’t think so, Remus,” Lily said, shaking her head. “I think he really loves you.”

“He doesn’t,” Remus said. “He can’t. Not like that.”

“Remus, do you love him?” she asked. Remus closed his eyes.

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “I love him.”

“So why are you doing this to yourself? Just ask him what he meant when he said it. You don’t even have to tell him anything, just ask him what he meant.”

“But… what if he says it was a joke?”

“First of all, I don’t think he will,” Lily said. “But if he does, that’s what you’re expecting, isn’t it? It won’t be a surprise or anything.”

“I know, I know, I just…” Remus sighed and looked away from her. “I don’t think I’m ready to hear him say it. To be properly rejected.”

“Oh, Rem,” she said. They had reached the end of the corridor and Lily stopped to hug him. “Obviously I’m not going to make you do anything. You know what I think. Go find Sirius now, he’ll be waiting for you. Do what you think is right.”

“Yeah,” Remus said, hugging her back. “Yeah, okay.” So Lily went in the direction of the common room and Remus went to the Room of Requirement.

He found Sirius sitting with his back against the wall, the box beside him.

“You’re an idiot,” Remus told him, trying to put the conversation with Lily out of his mind. “You’re practically begging to get caught.” Sirius shrugged.

“I was waiting for you,” he said. “Come on, let’s go in.” They paced back and forth in front of the wall three times. We need a place to hide our things, Remus thought. A door appeared and Sirius opened it, leading the box in with his wand. They had been here before to hide loads of things. The room was pretty cluttered from years of students dumping their things in it but they knew where exactly to hide the box so that they’d be able to find it tomorrow when they needed it. Remus followed Sirius through aisles upon aisles of junk, looking at all the broken, discarded things people threw in here.

They found the corner where they’d left everything else and Sirius added the box to the rest of the pile.

“Are we done here?” Remus asked.

“Yep, we can leave now,” Sirius said. They had started walking back towards the door when Remus heard Sirius say it from behind him.

“Chaque jour je tombe plus amoureux de toi.” Remus turns to him and stops him in his tracks.

“Pads, why do you keep saying that? Who are you talking to?”

“Remus, you are aware that you’re the only one here right? I’m talking to you.”

“Then why… why are you—?”

“I know, I know, you don’t understand French,” Sirius says. “That’s why it's fun. It’s amusing to know something that you don’t, for once.”

“Sirius… I know what that sentence means,” Remus says quietly. Sirius’ neck snaps up.

“What?”

“I know what that sentence means,” Remus repeats.

“No, you don’t,” Sirius says, shaking his head.

“Yeah, I do. I asked Lily after the last time you said it. She translated for me.”

“Fuck, I didn’t know Lily could speak French,” Sirius says, rubbing a hand over his face. “So… so this whole time you’ve known what I’m saying? So you know that I… you know that I… oh god, Remus I’m sorry. I didn’t mean… I didn’t want to… I was just…” Sirius starts to back away, shaking his head and looking anywhere but at Remus. Remus reaches out and grabs his hand.

“Don’t go,” Remus says. “Sirius. Is it a joke? Are you making a joke? Actually, no, don’t tell me. Cause if it’s a joke I’d rather you bury me under all the crap in this room and spare me the pain.”

“What?”

“It’s not a joke, is it?” Remus asked, a pleading look in his eyes.

“No,” Sirius said, softly. “It’s not a joke. I’m sorry, Remus, I didn’t mean to—”

“Shh,” Remus said, pressing a finger to Sirius’ lips. “Sirius,” Remus tucked Sirius’ hair behind his ear. Remus was vaguely aware of Sirius stepping towards him, towards his touch. “I love you, too.” Sirius gapes at him

“Really?” he whispers.

“Yeah,” Remus says. He’s still holding Sirius’ hand. He pulls Sirius closer and lets his other hand graze Sirius’ cheek.

“Puis-je t'embrasser?” Sirius whispers.

“Pads, I… I don’t know what that means.” Sirius lets out a small laugh and looks down at the floor. Then he looks back up at Remus, his grey eyes glistening in the last sliver of sunlight. He’s biting his lip.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Please,” Remus says, without thinking. He feels the blush blooming on his cheeks but Sirius is already kissing him, rising on his tip-toes to make his lips reach Remus’. Remus feels electric currents dancing around his body, unable to contain the excitement. He’s kissing Sirius. Sirius is kissing him back. Sirius loves him. Sirius loves him in the same way that he loves Sirius. Sirius is snaking his hands around Remus’ waist pulling him closer. Sirius’ hair is soft, tangled between his fingers. Sirius is here, in his arms, and it’s everything Remus has been wanting and more.

“Wait, so now can you tell me everything you’ve been saying in French the whole time?” They’re sitting in the same large armchair, hands still linked together, legs tucked against their chests, knees and thighs and hips pressed together. Remus is very aware of every point where his skin is making contact with Sirius’. He’s counting them.

They found the armchair in the Room of Requirement; it’s unclear to them whether the chair is something that’s been dumped in the room by somebody else or if the room conjured it up because they were looking for it. 

Neither one of them wants to go back to the common room yet. Remus doesn’t want to see Lily’s smirk and to have to admit she was right at the moment. He’ll do that tomorrow. Right now, all he wants is to be with Sirius. To press little kisses to his nose, his cheeks, his jaw, his lips just because he can.

“Oh god,” Sirius says, burying his face in between Remus’ shoulder and the back of the armchair. “It’s like you want me to embarrass myself.”

“This surprises you?” Remus kisses the corner of his mouth. Then his jaw. Then his neck. Just because he can. “Please.”

“Ah fine,” Sirius gives in. “Um, what do you want to know?”

“What did you say that day at the lake?” Remus asks.

“Oh that. I said, ‘on devrait t’arrêter pour excès de beauté sur la voie publique’. It means uh… ugh, you’re going to laugh at me for this. It means ‘you should be arrested for excessive beauty in public’,” Sirius said, blushing. Remus rolled his eyes but he felt his cheeks heat too. He smiles a little.

“What about that day on the Astronomy Tower?” he continues.

“Ugh,” Sirius buries his face in his hands. “You’re trying to kill me. I said, ‘il y a tellement de soleil dans tes yeux que je bronze quand tu me regardes’. Which means, uh… ‘there’s so much sun in your eyes that I get a tan when you look at me.’”

“You’re quite the poet, aren’t you?” Remus smiles. “And what about tonight?”

“I thought you said you knew what that meant,” Sirius says. “Or were you bluffing the whole time?”

“No, I know what it means,” Remus says. “I just want to hear you say it. In English this time, please.”

“So demanding,” Sirius teases. “I’ve said it in French a million times already and you want me to say it in English? What difference does it make?”

“Well, none to you, you speak both languages.”

“Oh, alright,” Sirius says. It’s the first time Remus has seen his face really go red. He decides he likes it. “Every day I fall more in love with you.” Remus can’t hide his smile, nor does he want to, as he leans in to kiss Sirius. He brushes his lips against Sirius’ timidly before connecting them, his hand caressing Sirius’ cheek. Remus loses count of the points of contact between him and Sirius as their bodies melt together and Remus worries that he’s about to wake up from a dream. But when he feels Sirius’ hand gently tracing the scars on his hand he knows that this is real, that Sirius can really love him. Sirius does love him.

People come to the Room of Requirement to throw things away, to hide things that they don’t want anybody else to know about, to leave things they never want to see again. But that night, Remus didn’t just leave something in the Room of Requirement. He found something, too.

[ifmywishescametrue]

i don't know if you're still taking prompts (so please ignore this if you aren't) but i cant stop thinking about your recent buckytony fic (and how much i love breaking up and making up as a trope) - so i was wondering if you'd be up for doing smth else w that trope for buckytony?? maybe they re-unite at a mutual friend's wedding?? and it brings up emotions about their almost wedding?? idk i just really love breaking up and making up as a trope and i really love your writing :))

thank you!! I'm very much up for doing another buckytony break up/make up, plus you deserve nice things for finishing law school - congrats on that!🎉🎉hope you like this one 😊

There's a ring on Bucky's finger.

It's the first thing Tony notices when he walks into the bar for Natasha and Sharon's joint bachelorette party. He stands there in the doorway, frozen and staring until someone clears their throat pointedly behind him, and he mumbles an apology as he moves out of the way.

He thinks about turning around and not coming back, just ditching the event entirely and maybe even the wedding tomorrow, but he tosses the ridiculous thought the second it comes. He promised Sharon when she asked him to be her man of honor that he could handle Bucky being Nat's. Living on the other side of the country afforded him to miss the rest of the events and planning along the way, and he could deal with one day of being cordial to his ex, even if the day comes with walking down an aisle together.

But now there's a ring on Bucky's finger.

The silver catches the light, and it's on prominent display with his left hand wrapped around a beer bottle. It shouldn't be possible for him to have moved on that quickly. Eight months shouldn't be long enough to bury three years of memories. Three years of hopes and dreams and plans for a future built together. Years of love so blindingly intense that it burrowed into Tony's soul to make a home and refused to be evicted just because it was supposed to be over.

Tony wonders what the timeline is. Did he find someone new while Tony was still just beginning to pick up his own scattered pieces? A first date for him while Tony was barely getting out of bed. When was it that he replaced Tony as the last person to have his heart? And how did he find forever in someone else so soon after losing the one he used to call his soulmate?

Natasha notices him first, still hovering near the entrance, and she raises a single eyebrow that calls him a coward. He rolls his eyes at the accusation, though it's accurate. She elbows Sharon to catch her attention, and before he knows it the entire small group is turning their heads his way, giving him no choice but to join them.

It's less bachelorette party and more pre-wedding celebration with the crowd they've gathered, all mutual friends of both brides with no regards for gender traditions that usually come with this night. Tony used to fit in well with them all, back when gatherings like this were just a typical Friday night. But he made himself an outsider between the move to California and the breakup with Bucky. All he has now with most of them is a dead group chat that hasn't been used in months. He wonders which one of them made the new one without him in it.

Sharon is the first to pull him into a hug, then Natasha follows suit. He gets a nod from Sam, a wave from Clint, and what might pass as a smile from Steve. Bucky stares so intensely that Tony can feel his eyes with his back turned, but when Tony looks his way, he pretends to be interested in the floor.

He had a plan before the ring threw him off. Step one should have been the entrance. Head held high, shoulders square, perfect outfit that shows everything off and compliments the Malibu tan he has now. Step two should be nonchalance. A light hearted greeting to everyone, accompanied by an easy grin and relaxed body language, and catching up with subtle brags slipped in. Show them all that he's doing better than he ever was, sitting on top of the world these days, even if most of the time it feels like he's barely above rock bottom.

Step three in his ideal scenario involved Bucky breaking down and begging to get him back. Some versions even had him on his knees for it, with tears running down his face. Others required it to be raining outside, and the cloudless sky ruined that before the ring on Bucky's finger did.

With steps one and three out the window, he tries to salvage step two.

“Hey,” Tony starts, a little too loud. He swallows the lump in his throat and tries again, “Hey, Bucky. It's good to see you.”

Bucky nods, a strained, jerky motion. “Yeah, you too. How, uh, how have you been?”

“Good. Really good, actually. Company just had its highest sales quarter yet, so it’s been a little crazy around there, but good.”

“Good,” Bucky repeats, and there’s a long awkward pause.

“And what about you?” Tony asks, and then because he can’t help himself, he adds, “I see you got engaged. Or, hell, I guess it could be married, even.”

Bucky freezes with parted lips and wide eyes for the briefest of moments, like he wasn’t expecting Tony to know about it or bring it up, and his eyes shift to the ring on his hand and stay there.

“Yeah,” he says slowly. “Engaged. Last week.”

Tony ignores the ache in his chest and plasters on a smile like he’s happy for him. “Congratulations. Who’s the lucky guy?”

“Oh, you wouldn’t know him. Steve introduced us. They work together.”

“So he’s at the museum then? I thought you used to say that you hated all those stuffy guys and Steve was the only one worth knowing.”

Bucky smiles, a fond thing that widens the crack in Tony’s heart. “Yeah, well, I guess I was wrong. Felix is a great guy.”

Tony resists the urge to roll his eyes. Stupid name that probably matches a stupid, punchable face.

Some masochist thing pulls at him to make him keep digging for more information, a twisted need to know even as each word pushes the knife in deeper. He aims for casual, leaning back against one of the high top tables as he asks, “So how long have you been together?”

“Just a couple of months. Kind of fast, I know, but when you’re sure about something, it doesn’t really matter, right? Why waste time waiting?”

“Right, of course,” Tony says, a little flatter than he intends. “So why isn’t he here tonight? Hope it wasn’t to spare my feelings, because it’s really not necessary.”

Bucky falters, “It’s not? You, uh, you’re dating someone, then?”

Tony nods, and he wishes he had grabbed a drink before this so he could hide behind it as he lies through his teeth. “Only a few weeks, though. A little too early to be a wedding date, but I’m sure your guy will be there tomorrow right?”

“Oh, um, yeah, definitely. Why wouldn’t he be, right? There’s no reason I can think of,” Bucky says, stumbling around it. “But tell me more about your thing. Your person. How’s that going?”

Tony shrugs, and he finally pulls off that easy smile he’s been trying for. “Well, it’s not get engaged in a couple of months good, but it’s been really great. We’re taking it slow. Trying not to rush anything and just get to know each other first. I think it could really be something, though.”

“That’s good,” Bucky mumbles. “You deserve something good.”

He isn’t meeting Tony’s eyes anymore, almost like he’s upset that Tony moved on, and the vindictive part of Tony wants to be happy about it, but another part wants to be angry because it isn’t fair. It’s not fair to act like Tony should stay stuck in time, forever longing for him when he already moved on with someone else first. It’s hypocritical and selfish, even if Tony is lying about there being anyone else.

“Well, I’m gonna go get a drink,” Tony says, pushing down every feeling. “Should catch up with everyone else, too, while I’m at it. I’ll talk to you later.”

He heads over to the bar and isn’t surprised when Sharon joins him a moment later, right after he orders a double shot of whiskey. She puts an arm around his shoulder and asks, “Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Tony laughs, running a hand through his hair. “My ex is engaged to somebody else and apparently doing really fucking well. Meanwhile, I’m making up fake boyfriends that I’m taking it slow with, because last week I went on my first real date in eight months and cried in the bathroom in the middle of it. And then, at the end of the night, he literally told me to my face that he didn’t think a second date was a good idea. We weren’t even talking about it, Sharon. He said it unprompted when we were still ten minutes from his apartment, and I was driving.”

Sharon nods slowly as she processes the rant. “He told you he got engaged?”

“Yeah, thanks for not telling me, by the way. It was really fun to get blindsided by it.”

She ignores the complaint to ask, “What else did he tell you, exactly?”

“Oh, just the whole line about how you know when you know, and Felix is such a great guy, and all that bullshit.”

“Felix,” Sharon repeats.

Tony knocks back the rest of his drink and orders another. “Please tell me he’s not better looking than me. Tell me it’s a downgrade. Don’t lie, because I know I have to meet him tomorrow, but please give me something that will make this better.”

“Well, I can guarantee he’s not as attractive as you. But he’s a little too perfect, you know? Like how could this guy possibly be real, he’s so unbelievably perfect,” Sharon says.

“I told you to make me feel better, not worse.”

Sharon shakes her head with a smile, the arm around him tightening into an approximation of hug. “I wouldn’t worry about it too much. I don’t think they’re going to last. He’s kind of flaky, too. Always cancelling at the last minute and all that. Bet he won’t even show tomorrow.”

The amusement on her face that she’s failing to hide confuses him. He’s starting to feel bad, though, for making the night about him when it should be about her and Nat.

Resolving not to dwell on it anymore, he squeezes the hand on his shoulder and says, “Alright, enough sad drinking, and definitely enough about me. We’re celebrating you and Nat and a lifetime of sickeningly wonderful happiness for both of you.”

Sharon grins, “Hell yeah, we are.”

“Shots?”

“Is that even a question?”

_____________

He wakes up with a headache and hazy memories. Shots of tequila that turned into shots of vodka when Nat got involved, then Clint’s terrible suggestion to try a shot of every liquor they had to offer. He vaguely remembers the round of toasts and drunken impromptu speeches from everyone, locking eyes with Bucky and failing to look away on both their parts. There’s a blur of wandering hands and heated, messy kisses. A bathroom stall turned into a cab ride which turned into his hotel room. He knows what he’ll find next to him when he opens his eyes, and guilt comes in full force.

“I know you’re awake,” Bucky says, voice still rough with sleep. It used to be Tony’s favorite sound in the world. “And I know we’re both sorry about what happened, but pretending to be asleep isn’t fixing nothin’.”

Tony shifts over to his back, and if there was any question before about what happened between them, the all too familiar ache in his body would answer it. He stares up at the ceiling to avoid the acres of bare skin on display next to him.

“You should probably leave,” Tony says to the walls. “I’m sure your fiancé is wondering where you are.”

“I doubt it.”

Tony puts an arm over his eyes, partly to block out the light that makes them ache and partly to hide his face. “Just go, okay? It was a mistake, and it won’t happen again, and we don’t have to talk about it.”

“Was it a mistake?” Bucky asks. “It didn’t feel like one to me.”

He doesn’t answer, and it’s soft and broken when Bucky says his name. Too much for him to handle.

Tony pushes back the blankets and searches for Bucky’s clothes in the mess they’ve made. He finds the shirt first and throws it at him. “You’re engaged, which means it was a mistake.”

His boxers are on the back of the couch, jeans right in front of the door, and they join the pile on Bucky’s lap. “You promised the rest of your life to somebody else, and I’m pretty sure fidelity is supposed to go with that.”

He tosses a shoe in the general direction of the bed, and it hits the nightstand with a loud thud. The second shoe is still in his hand when Bucky gets up and walks over to him, taking it and letting it drop to the floor.

His eyes hold a level of intensity that Tony has spent months dreaming about, and Tony couldn’t look away or move from this spot even if he tried.

“Felix isn’t real,” Bucky says. “I made him up when you asked, because I didn’t want to tell you the truth that I haven’t moved on in the slightest. That I’m so pathetic that I’ve spent the last eight months wearing an engagement ring that I bought for a guy who doesn’t love me anymore because I don’t know how to let him go.”

Tony stops breathing. “What?”

Bucky slides the ring from his finger, holding it between them so Tony can see the inscription. Always yours. He can’t remember the last time he heard the words get spoken.

“When?” Tony asks hoarsely. “When did you get that and why didn’t you ever ask me?”

“About a year ago,” Bucky says, slipping it back on his own finger. He sits back on the edge of the bed and stares down at it, twisting it around. “I thought about doing it on your birthday, but Nat and Sharon had just gotten engaged the week before and I didn’t want to take anything away from them. You were working a lot of late nights after that, and I thought it would be better to wait until things slowed down. You were so tired all the time, and you deserved a better proposal than when you’re falling asleep in the middle of dinner. It never slowed down, though. And then you got that big promotion and somehow we fell apart instead. If I’m honest, I still don’t really know how. One minute I’m getting ready to come with you, and the next you’re telling me not to bother.”

Tony sits down next to him, shoulders touching, and he pulls Bucky’s left hand into his. “You didn’t really want to go.”

“That’s not true,” Bucky says, but Tony shakes his head.

“All you talked about was how much you would miss New York. How much you���d miss your friends and your family and your job. Every day, everywhere we went. Even the fucking hot dog stands got sonnets about them. It really didn’t take a genius to figure out that you weren’t exactly looking forward to leaving.”

“I still would have gone for you,” Bucky argues. “I told you I would go anywhere with you, if it was what you wanted.”

“And then what? You move with me, and you’re miserable all the time, because my job never slows down so I’m still not around as much as you want, except now it’s compounded because you’re in a city that you hate with no one else that you know. You resent me for making you go, and the outcome is the same in the end either way.”

“Or I move with you, and I finally ask you to marry me like I’ve wanted to since almost the day we met. I find new friends and a new job, and even if it’s not perfect, it’s still worth it because at the end of the day I have a husband coming home to me.”

Tony runs his thumb over the ring and murmurs, “I wanted you to be happy. I didn’t think I could do that for you anymore.”

Bucky cups his cheek, tilting his head up to meet his eyes. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but baby, you’re an idiot.”

“Oh, thanks,” Tony laughs.

“You’re my idiot, if that helps.”

Tony smiles, still fragile but growing more hopeful. “Am I?”

“Always have been,” Bucky says. “Always will be if you stop assuming I’m going to leave you all the time. Let me decide for myself what I’m willing to sacrifice for us.”

Tony nods slowly, then says, “I’m sorry for ending it like that.”

“I’m sorry for making you feel like you had to.”

Tony climbs into his lap, circling his arms around his neck, and Bucky pulls him in closer with his hands on Tony’s hips. The ring is strange to feel against his skin, but also completely right. He wants it to stay there and to mean what it was always supposed to. Wants one of his own to match.

“We can fix it, right? We can be us again?”

“I don’t know,” Bucky says, and Tony’s heart sinks for just a moment. “Is your boyfriend as real as my fiancé?”

Tony laughs again in relief, “Yeah, they’d be a good pair.”

“I knew you had to be lying. You’ve never taken it slow in your life,” Bucky grins.

“Do you want me to start now?”

Bucky flips them over in one fluid motion, and he kisses up his throat as he murmurs, “Absolutely not.”

[nsfwshiggy]

criminal

_______________________________________________

paring: shigaraki x fem!reader (no quirks)

warnings: 18+, sex toys, slight dirty talk, degrading (name calling) unprotected vaginal sex, noncon/dubcon, public sex, water sports(?) , cumming inside

word count: 2k

author's note: ah i'm finally posting again :D college just started again so i've been trying to get back into the swing of things but my goal is still post at least once a week and maybe twice if i have the time. i started writing this at 1am when i should've been either sleeping or studying for a quiz i have tomorrow. oh well. i hope you enjoy! constructive criticism is welcomed and encouraged.

_______________________________________________

you couldn’t believe that he made you wear this while you had to be in classes all day. you were nervous that the other people around you would be able to hear it so you got to class a little early just so you could get a seat in the back where not a lot of people sit. you send your boyfriend shigaraki a text before class started –

I am in class please don’t do anything stupid.

knowing your boyfriend perfectly well you already knew what he was going to do but honestly you were excited because you didn’t know exactly when it was going to happen. you guys were trying out a new toy but shigaraki was the one who bought it so you literally had no idea what the toy did, but you had an idea.

the toy was obviously a vibrator but you didn't know how powerful it was or how many speeds it had. you were in for a real surprise when he finally decided to use it.

you look at your phone to see if he texted back but you find that he just read your message. you hated when he did that so you just locked your phone and decided to actually pay attention in class.

about 20 minutes pass without anything happening, you were kind of disappointed that he hasn't tried anything yet. you feel your phone vibrate and you look down and see it's from shigaraki –

be a good girl

reading that made you quiver because that's what he always says before he does something to you. another 5 minutes pass and it feels like he was just picking on you by sending you that text message. you pick up your phone to send him another text but before you could - you feel it.

you gasp so loudly that some of the students turn around and look at you. you grip onto the desk in front of you. you try your best to laugh it off but -

holy fuck

it was so powerful

this was like nothing you've ever experienced before. the toy was already deep inside you so it was hitting your sweet spot right when it was turned on. you straighten your back out and push yourself into your seat even more to get friction in the other places that were desperate to be touched.

you look at the clock and see that you had another 5 minutes until class was over. your knuckles were starting to go white with how hard you were gripping the desk. you could see out of the corner of your eye that your phone was going off with multiple messages from shigaraki –

are you being a good girl?

is it making my good girl feel good?

i cant wait to the mess you made in your panties.

you couldn't do anything but just sit there because you knew if you moved the vibrator would move and if it were to move even the slightest you didn't know what kind of noise would come out of you. you only wished that the class would hurry up and finish so you could go to the bathroom so you could finish.

all of a sudden it stopped. you were so closed to cumming just from the toy but you knew shigaraki liked watching you finish.

finally the class was finished and you rushed out of the class. the bathroom wasn't too far away so you quickly walked down the hall but right before you could grab the door handle you felt it again but this time it was way more powerful.

you fall to your knees right in the middle of the hall while other students were passing you and looking down at you confused. you press your legs together and squeeze your eyes shut trying not to scream with how good you are feeling. you feel hands grabbing you to lift you off the floor but your legs are shaking so much that you can't even stand so you almost fall again but the person holds you up.

you finally open your eyes to see who is holding you up and it is none other than the person who put you into this situation - shigaraki. he wraps your arms around his neck and whispers into your ear, "how do you feel knowing that all of these people are watching you right now?"

you bite his shoulder to keep you from moaning to loudly. once again you were so close to actually finishing and it felt beyond amazing. "s-shigaraki please" you say quietly while resting your head on his shoulder. "tell me what you want? hm?" he says while laughing at you. he pulls you away from him and helps you walk into the bathroom not caring that he shouldn't be in there.

he locks the door behind you and pushes you over to the counter. "p-please let me finish" you ask him while starting to put your hand down your panties but before you could he pulls your hand away. "i don't think so.." he says while pushing his lips onto yours for the first time all day. "..i want you to beg for it like the good girl you. you are a good girl right?" he ask while smirking at you.

you look up at him and tell him that you are his good girl and that you will do anything he tells you to do. he pulls out a remote from his pocket and turns off the toy finally. you whine when the vibrating stops. "good girls don't whine" he says while pushing your skirt up and sliding his hands down into your panties. he slightly touches your swollen clit making you buck your hips into him.

"look at you acting like a little bitch in heat" he says right into your ear while slightly pushing his long slender finger into your tight hole. you push on his chest while your head falls back. "don't get too happy i'm only taking out the toy so you can't cum without me" he chuckles at you. you start to whine again.

he placed the toy that was covered in your wetness on the counter beside you. "i feel so empty now please just fuck me already" you whine at him. he was taking too long and you just wanted him to fill you up already. he turns you around and pushes you over the counter letting you see yourself in the mirror.

"look at that little slut in the mirror begging me to fuck her tight hole" he says while running a single finger down your slit. "you got so wet just from that toy" he laughs looking at you in the mirror.

you push back into him and grind your ass on his clothed dick. you look over your shoulder and see him with his head pushed back because just the feeling of your ass feels amazing against his already hard dick. he grabs your hips making you stop and then you hear him unzip his pants.

you were so ready for him to be buried deep inside you but he continue to move slowly just to tease you even more. "you have to wait patiently if you want me to fuck you good" he says while pumping his dick and slightly rubbing it up and down your dripping slit.

you moan when you finally feel him enter you. "ahh fuck fuck" you whimper while he slowly pushes into rubbing against the now highly sensitive spot deep inside of you. "p-please stop teasing me" you managed to say while looking at him in the mirror. he looks you right in the eyes and winks at you.

you try to take control but before you can do that he slams right into you without warning making you scream out in pleasure. your head drops onto the cold counter as he continues to completely destroy your insides. "does that make my little slut happy? fucking you so roughly?" he asks while slapping your ass leaving it stinging.

he lifts up one of your legs making it feel like he was even deeper inside of you, "holy f-fuck shigaraki.." you sob while he picks up the pace. you were starting to feel that tightening sensation that you always feel when you are about to cum. "i-i'm about to cum" you moan out as you look at yourself in the mirror.

your hair was sticking to your forehead because you had gotten so sweaty and some of your mascara was running down your cheeks. shigaraki says nothing and continues to push inside of you with a steady flow. you were just about to finish but you were cut off when you hear a knock on the bathroom door.

shigaraki stops and looks at you in the mirror. he holds a finger up to his mouth telling you to stay quiet. once again he says nothing and without warning pushes into you again with full force. you couldn't stop yourself from moaning out and this time you were so loud but you didn't care. you really needed to finish and every time you were close it was always taken away.

you didn't even try to stop your moans from coming out anymore you were feeling so unbelievably good that you just couldn't. shigaraki puts his hand over your mouth while continuing to do what he does best. "do you want to cum baby girl?" he asks while slowing down his thrusts but every time he would push into you he would stop for a second before pulling out again.

you nod your head yes vigorously. your legs were starting to shake. you were so close and shigaraki could tell just from you clenching around him. "fuckk.." he moans from the feeling "if you keep clenching like that i'm going to cum inside of you. i'll fill you up my little whore" he states while taking his hand away from your mouth. whoever was at the door had given up.

you nod your head, "please please" you whimper while trying to clenching even tighter around him "i want you to cum inside of me p-please" you say while looking into his eyes through the mirror. the tightening in your lower belly was back and every time he would push into you brought you even closer.

shigaraki wraps his hand around you so he could rub your neglected clit. your knees buckled as he did this giving you the final push you needed to finally cum. but because you were being over stimulated you did more than just cum. warm liquid started to slowly leak from you and you tried your best to keep it in but you couldn't.

you were so physically tired that you couldn't hold even a moan or whimper in. shigaraki was surprised by this but he didn't care because you could feel his hot load shoot into you feeling you up just like he said he would. he mumbles out a bunch of words that you couldn't make out.

he says inside of you for a few seconds before pulling out and some of his seed leaks out. you were a mess and you were also making a mess on the floor. "i should've bought that toy a long time ago" he says while laughing and holding you up once again pushing the sweaty hair off your face.

you fall into his arms because of how dizzy you felt.

"are you ready for round two at home?" he questions wiping some of your mascara off your cheeks.

©️nsfwshiggy

[myhoneststudyblr]

every single student in the world has likely procrastinated at some point - i know i definitely have! sometimes i think it can be quite helpful because means that you don't spend every minute of every day studying... but on the other hand, it can become very hard to beat. there are so many advice posts in the community on this topic but i thought that i would share my own tips! 

disclaimer: everyone studies differently and these are my personal tips. they may not work for you but they can be a good starting point 

What is Procrastination?

i found this little summary of procrastinating on the internet and thought it completely covered everything that i wanted to say on this point:

Procrastination is the habit of delaying an important task, usually by focusing on less urgent, more enjoyable, and easier activities instead. It is different from laziness, which is the unwillingness to act.

Procrastination can restrict your potential and undermine your career. It can also disrupt teamwork, reduce morale, and even lead to depression and job loss. So, it's crucial to take proactive steps to prevent it.

The first step to overcoming procrastination is to recognize that you're doing it. Then, identify the reasons behind your behavior and use appropriate strategies to manage and overcome it.

- How to Stop Procrastinating by Mindtools

so what is learnt from this is that:

procrastination is not being lazy 

it is avoiding tasks by doing other easier tasks

it can have negative effects

you need to proactively take steps to avoid it 

first, recognise the procrastinating then use strategies to break the cycle

Conventional Tips

these are the basic tips that are some of the most well-known strategies for ending procrastination and can be some of the most important steps!

1. get organised. tidy up your desk to study space because there is nothing worse than having to work in a place that is chaotic and mess. collect the information you need for the task, for example, notes you've made or a textbook. 

2. to-do lists are your friend. a lot of people (including me) really struggle with timetables for studying because it can seem really structured and there is no flexibility or real allowance for things that may crop up during the day (your food takes longer to cook, you have to unexpectedly do a task around the house, you get a really bad headache and need to take a break). in my opinion, to-do lists help solve this problem! you can clearly see the tasks that you want to get done for the day but you don't have stressful time constraints. personally, i always use todoist to keep track of everything. to-do lists also make it easier to break tasks down

3. break the task down. one of the biggest cause of procrastination is having a huge task or project ahead of you because it seems really daunting and where on earth are you even going to start? so break it down *completely*. in your to-do list, don't just write ‘german homework’, write down even task that you need to do within it and be specific: for example ‘pg. 11 ex 4a, 4b and 4c’, ‘textbook listening task on pg. 47′ and ‘250-word essay on social media in Germany’. breaking it down makes the tasks seem more attainable and when you’ve done one and you can cross it off your list, it gives you a boost to keep going

4. eliminate distractions. this is a big one. even if you do all of the above, if you are constantly being distracted by things, you aren't going to get much done. try to find a place that is quiet enough that you can focus and you feel comfortable studying in. as well as this you need to think about what to do with your phone as the likelihood is that this will be the most distracting thing. you can simply turn it off, put on do not disturb, leave it in another room or use and app like forest (that last one is what i use and i don't know where i would be without it!)

5. use incentives. finishing a task is an achievement so treat it like one! before you study, decide on something that you will give yourself as a reward for doing it. this may be watching that new episode of your favourite programme or a tasty snack! 

6. set timers. don't just launch yourself into a task, because that again can make it seem daunting and feel unending. rather, set a timer for a specific time because you’ll know that you just need to focus for that specific length of time and then you can go take a break and do something nice. for timing your study sessions, you could use the Pomodoro technique 

7. allow for breaks (but try to avoid long ones). you are not a machine and as much as it would be great to be able to, you cant study for hours on end without giving your mind a break from focusing. so schedule in break time for yourself, particularly for times that you know your motivation dips, and do something nice. but be very careful that you don't accidentally slip back into procrastinating habits and keep breaks short. unless you are very disciplined it is unlikely that an hour-long break will stay just an hour.

8. know how you study but don’t be afraid to mix it up. everyone studies differently and so there are going to be some study methods that work better for some than others. so try to make sure that you are studying smart and that you aren't wasting your own time cause that can be incredibly unmotivating. HOWEVER, if there is anything that I’ve learnt from online school its that doing the same task all the time, every day is mind-numbingly boring and you just want to do anything else. so try to switch up what you are doing. if you usually just type notes from the textbook, maybe try doing it in a mindmap one week, or on flashcards, maybe do some practise questions to keep your mind engaged. 

9. play music. now this one really depends on the person and how you study. some people need absolute silence and that is fine, but others need something to fill the silence or maybe cover up background noise (for example if you live in a busy household). try to pick music however that is not going to distract you - the key tips for this is to pick music without lyrics. this can be classical music, video game music, or general ‘chill’ music (there are so many playlists out there for chill studying music). i personally listen to Francesco Parrino religiously while studying because he does piano covers of pop songs, so i know the songs and enjoy them but there are no lyrics that can distract me 

10. stay hydrated, well-rested and not hungry. this is part of eliminating distractions because if you are thirsty, you are going to be thinking about how you want a drink; if you are tired, you are going to be thinking about how tired you are; if you are hungry, you are going to be thinking about what you want for lunch or whatever. make sure you are hydrated, well-rested and not hungry so you can focus solely on your task or work.

Unconventional Tips

these are some slightly more unusual tips that you might not have seen before but that I've nevertheless found very useful!

1. video yourself or do a timelapse. this is something that I’ve only recently done because i saw a tip on this from someone during my quarantine challenge and thought that it would be cool to do. and it really works! i did it twice once when i was typing notes and a second time when i was handwriting notes and it really made me focus on what is as doing because the video put some pressure on me to look like i was properly studying - i could take a 5-minute break in the middle of my work to mess around with my pen, I just had to keep going so it really forces you to do the work. also watching the video when i was done made me really proud cause i had visual proof of how much i completed!

2. accept that some days you are going to get very little done. this may seem a little bit odd to put on a post that is meant to avoid getting nothing done but it’s actually a very important thing to remember. sometimes you need to take days off because otherwise you are going to burnout and some days you are just not going to be in the right mindset for studying because maybe you are exhausted after a big exam, or you have a headache or you feel unwell. you just need to accept it, draw a line under it, take time for yourself, and resolve yourself to work tomorrow once you feel a bit better. there is no shame in taking time to make sure you stay healthy. if you can, try to get your quickest, easiest task done so you have some sense of accomplishment.

3. ‘churn it out and f**k off’. this was my mum’s motto when she was studying and working in academia. and she recently told it to me when i was getting stressed about all the big tasks during online school. i am a perfectionist and i always want to hand in my very best work, put 100% into everything, but honestly that is impossible. some days you just need to get stuff done and if that isn't your very best then it doesn't matter too much because at least you got it done. and once you get it done you can just forget about it.

4. ask a friend or parent to check up on you. when you are studying by yourself it can be hard to motivate yourself because you know that no ones actually going to check whether you made those votes or did the reading, so ask a friend or someone you live with to check whether you've done the work or get them to read essays. you then get an external reason to study or do your tasks because you need to show them something.

5. rephrase how you think of tasks. when you think that ‘you need to do this task’ or ‘you have to get this done’, a lot of the time this causes unneeded stress and anxiety that is not going to help you at all. also it makes it seem like you are being forced to do something and human beings generally don't act great when they are forced to do something. so try to change your language when thinking about task into one that is more forgiving such as ‘i choose to do this project so that i can go meet my friends tomorrow’ and ‘i choose to read this book now because it will help me in the lecture next week’. this is probably the most difficult strategy on this list and it will take a lot of practice (i am certainly still practising it) but in the long term, it can help you change the way in which you view studying for the better. 

✨✨✨

i hope this was helpful and that these tips will be useful, and perhaps you've discovered some new ones! if anyone has anything to add please feel free to reply or reblog with the advice <3

[amnxsia]

ilanga 

(n.) a person who will forgive anything the first time, tolerate the second time but never a third time.

A/n: Inspired by my brainrot. Everything that is said in German will be translated and bolded.

Taglist:  @shisoaya, @callmepromise, @namischild, @namrekcaivel, @icedkoffees, @erens-piss-cleaner, @sofi-yeager, @peachysimp, @fiaficsxo, @eremiie, @odmlevis, @weepinglevi​

Summary: Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction is what brought it back.

Content: dom and sub undertones, smut. nsfw minors dni

Trigger Warnings: manipulation, public sex, dacryphilia, branding, cigarettes, dedegration, slapping.

Word Count: 2241

Forgive anything the first time.

“Jean how many times do I have to tell you, Y/n isn’t allowed to drink.” Eren says staring daggers at him.

“And why the hell shouldn’t she? Just because you’re her boyfriend doesn’t mean you can tell her what she can’t and can do it’s a fucking party for god sakes Jaeger.”

“Ja, warum kann ich nicht etwas trinken Eren?” You say standing behind Jean. with big glassy doe eyes.

“Yeah why cant I have a drink Eren?” 

Eren ignores you. Knowing that this is your first strike.

“You know what fuck you Jean, and fuck this party. I’m going home.”

Ignoring whatever else Jean has to say Eren pulls you towards him and whispers.

“Dies ist dein erster Schlag, also viel Spaß Prinzessin”

“This is your first strike so have fun princess.”

Ah there it is, his dominance.

One of the many things that ran straight to your core. Making you clench your legs, one of the many things to love about Eren Jaeger.

Even if you manipulated him time to time you would always be running back to him like a lost puppy trying to find it’s lost owner.

“Jean I’m leaving the party too. Have fun.”

“Whatever.”

You walk out the door, seeing a figure sitting on the curb.

“So bald zurück? Ich dachte, du würdest Spaß mit Pferdegesicht haben und einen Sturm kichern” Eren saying with a smirk.

“Back so soon? I thought you would be having fun with horse face and giggling up a storm.”

“Eren we don’t have to talk in German all the time.” you say giggling while bending down to sit next to him.

“Oh? But I thought you loved it when I talked in German, you would always clench you thighs whenever I would speak, it’s cute that you actually thought I didn’t notice.” Eren says sliding closer to you dipping his hand at your cunt rubbing it very slowing.

“Du bist schon so nass und ich habe dich noch nicht einmal richtig berührt“ Eren whispers in your ear. Shoving your panties to the side and teasing your folds.

“Your so wet already and I havent even touched you properly yet.”

Now sinking a slender finger inside stretching you out, you bit your lip to contain the moans.

Eren smirks.

“What’s wrong baby? just because we’re in public doesn’t mean you have to be quiet, no as far as I am concerned you can say my name no you can moan it, and not in German in English for everyone to hear. I want everyone to know that this pretty cunt belongs to me and only me.” He says while laughing.

“Im sorry.”

Eren stops.

“What was wrong sweet pea?” He says no teasing or playfulness laced with voice just genuine concern.

“I said I’m sorry. I just don’t want other girls all over you .” You say with hot tears streaming down your face.

Ah.

Needy baby.

“It’s okay baby, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’ll stop bringing them.”

Eren kisses you and ruffles your hair.

“I’ll see you later.”

Tolerate the second

You were doing it again.

Pissing him off.

You said you were sorry the last time, but you also loved how angry he would get if you were around other guys.

Like now.

You were sandwiched between two guys who were getting handsy with you, but you could care less about Eren and his anger issues, you would win this bet and that would be it.

But unbeknownst to you Eren was staring at you with nothing but a loving smile at you. Sitting down in a chair with his legs crossed, he was wearing black all over, sliver rings to compliment his fingers, his hair pulled back into a man bun with a few baby hairs sticking out, and black leather boots.

You looked over to him to see if he reacted in any type of way, but you started to panic when you saw him looking your way with a smile on his face. You get up and usher everyone out.

“Party’s over.”

When everyone had dispersed you focus your attention to Eren who would still looking at you with a smile on his face.

“Oh? Party ist vorbei, wie kommt es, dass es gerade interessant wurde.”

“Oh? Party's over how come it was just getting interesting.”

“Warum benimmst du dich so?”

“Why are you acting like this eren?”

“Because you think I’m fucking stupid that’s why.”

“Excuse me?”

Eren ignores your statement.

“Lass diese Jungs und diese Wette nicht zu deinem verdammten Kopf gehen, denn ich werde dich wieder zur Relalität bringen.”

“Don’t let those boys and this bet go to your fucking head because I will bring you back down to reality.”

“Warum nimmst du teil, wenn du schon wütend wirst? Ich beweise jetzt schon einen Punkt und die Wette ist noch nicht einmal beendet.”

“Why are you participating if your getting mad already im already proving a point now and the bet is not even finished.”

Eren pulls you closer to him and spreads your legs with his knee

“You’ll figure it out tomorrow if you piss me off again.”

But never a third time

Today was the last day of your bet with Eren. And of course you wanted to see what he had planned for you, even if that meant burying your own grave. Today was your 2 year anniversary and later tonight you would be going to a dinner with Eren, family and friends so they could meet him. 

This was the perfect opportunity for all of Eren’s wrath to come down on you.

You decided to wear the shortest skirt you could find. You did your makeup, hair, and decided to put some rings on your fingers just like Eren.

After completing your look you walk downstairs to see Eren in a suit with rings on his fingers and a single earring dangling from his earlobe.

“Hey.”

“You look nice today.”

“Thanks.”

The car ride to the restaurant was very quiet, slowed and reverb music was playing from the radio.

Now at the restaurant Eren greets your parents and close friends.

Now everyone is in their seats before a waitress comes up and asks them what they would like to eat.

You look at your menu and say what you want and family says they want whatever you order.

Someone else walks in the restaurant with a smile and a box in their hands.

And it begins

Your mother pats you on your shoulder to tell you;

“Einer Ihrer Freunde hat etwas, das er Ihnen schenken möchte”

“One of your friends have something they want to give to you as a gift.”

Eren looks to the stranger with a concerned face, and then back to you.

“Wer ist er?”

“Who is he?”

You look at Eren trying contain a laugh.

“ein Freund.”

“A friend.”

Before Eren can say anything more the gentleman comes up to you and wraps his arms hugging you very tightly not to tightly just enough to give you affection.

“Hallo, es ist schon eine Weile her, wie geht es dir?”

“Hi it's been a while how are you?” He says with the biggest smile on his face.

“Ich war gut froh, dass es dir gut geht. Ich habe von einem kleinen Vogel gehört, dass du ein Geschenk für mich hast.”

“I've been good glad you are doing well I heard from a little birdy that you have a present for me.”

He blushes and he looks down at the floor, you take your hand and motions his head to look at you.

“Speak.”

And so he does.

“Ja, es ist ein Geschenk, es ist ein Ring mit meinem Namen, ich denke du wirst es mögen.”

“Yes it is a gift, it's a ring with my name on it i think you will like it.”

And thats when he takes out the ring and places it on your and then genty kisses your hand and wrists.

And thats when all hell breaks loose.

Eren quickly gets up from the table, dashes to your side and grabs your from the hem your shirt.

“Entschuldigung für die Unannehmlichkeiten, aber wir müssen jetzt gehen.”

“Sorry for the inconvenience but we need to leave now.”

Before either of your parents could say anything both you and Eren were out of the restaurant and heading to the car.

Eren throws you into the car, but his face is unreadable which is turning you on even more. He gets into the car and starts to drive, his knuckles white from how hard he’s gripping the steering wheel. Unlike from before he doesn’t allow you turn on the radio to ease the tension.

Now getting out the car you and Eren walks towards your shared house, he lets you enter the house first after entering the house he slams the door, making chills run down your body.

“Eren was ist los?”

“Eren what’s wrong-”

Eren slaps you.

“Jetzt will die Hure plötzlich reden?”

“Now the whore wants to talk suddenly?”

“Kleidung aus und auf allen vieren auf dem Boden.” Eren says while walking towards the living room.

“Clothes off and on all fours on the floor.”

And without a thought you discharge all of the clothes on your and make your way to the living to see Eren staring down at the floor with a cigarette between his slightly chapped lips, momentarily exhaling and inhaling the puffs of air.

“Schau nicht ohne Vorahnung auf.”

“Don't look up without permission.”

Eren takes another inhale of his cigarette.

“Ich habe dir gesagt, lass diese verdammte Wette nicht zu und andere Jungs gehen dir in den Kopf.”

“I told you dont let this fucking bet and other boys go to your head.”

And with that Eren grabs both of your wrists and gently plants the cigarette on your wrist.

“This is where he kissed you at right? This is where he planted those disgusting lips on you.”

You buck your hips to try and loosen his grip on you but to no avail.

“Answer me.”

“Ja.”

“Yes.”

“Now answer me this. Why are you letting other asshole touch you.”

“Eren-”

He pushes the cigarette down more on your skin, burning you a bit.

“Answer.”

“I was just accepting a gift from him, it didn’t mean anything I swear.”

“Now why would I believe you? This whole week you’ve been trying to piss me off and you know what y/n, have you succeeded in doing that so I’m having a hard time believing in anything that you say right now.”

Eren let’s his grip on your wrist goes, and places the cigarette in the ash tray. And then grabbing your neck up so you were both eye to eye.

“Tell me the truth and I’m all yours baby.” He said lightly licking your neck.

“Explain it all in German for me.” He said adding on, crossing his legs.

“Ich wollte mich wütend machen, damit du mich so hart ficken kannst, so gut, ich liebe es so sehr, ich liebe dich so sehr.”

“i wanted to make mad at me so you could fuck me like so hard, so good, i love it so much, i love you so much.”

You exhale, tears running down your face, you start to rut your bare cunt against the hardwood floor.

Your crying and the sight of you trying to get off on the floor went straight to Eren’s dick.

Eren starts to unbuckle his pants, his freed cock slapping aganist his abdomen.

“You think you can handle it baby?”

“Mhm yes- I know I can, I’ll be good again I promise, I’ve been acting so terrible these past few weeks and making you angry m’sorry Eren.”

And with that Eren bridal carries you to your shared bed room and gently puts you down.

“Open.”

And you do opening your mouth wide, Eren sticks two of his fingers in your mouth.

“Do I need to prep you?”

You shake your head no.

Eren smirks “Good girl.”

And with that Eren enters your hole.

“I love you, you know that right?” Eren says playing with your hair.

“Yes I know.”

“And everything I do is for you remember that. From the way I fuck you, from the way I do all of acts of service to words of affirmation there all for you and no one else.” He says finally moving the once quiet filled house now turning into sounds of skin slapping, panting that would last all the way into the evening then into the night.

Next day

You woken to the morning rays that were peeking out from your windows. Turning over you see that Eren had left but to where you wonder. Not that it matter you don’t care about anyone else but him, only him and him alone matters.

Somewhere far away, Eren had a box in his hand and a note along with it. He was at a house your parent’s house. Now knowing that your parents didn’t ever want to you to be with him he knocks on the door before setting the box and the note on the welcome mat and then walking away, hopping into his car.

The box being a wedding invation and a note saying; “Wenn du versuchst, für mich zu kommen, blühe ich weiter <3″

“You try to come for me I keep on flourishing. <3″

© all content belongs to amnxsia 2021. do not modify or repost.

[cryingoverkanej]

the crows in rollerskates:

(this is so long but its worth reading i promise)

anytime all six crows are in ketterdam they have an unspoken rule that they must congregate at the van eck mansion for dinner.

even kaz shows up. every time without fail. he says inej threatens him into it but really he just loves seeing his friends. matthias is alive idc

he’d never tell anyone that but they all know.

so one day after getting an invite from wylans very exhausted runner kaz locks up his office and makes his way through the sunday afternoon crowds.

jesper is buzzing.

wylan sighs at him but cant wipe the grin off his face at his husband’s happiness theyre married now because i said so

jesper has been gliding around the halls for the better part of a week testing out his new rollerskates.

he picked it up suprisingly quickly and was doing jumps and spins within the first day, far too close to the expensive vases for wylans liking.

wylan had had a go too, slipping and sliding, his face twisting into varying levels of uncertainty, falling with every step.

jesper was too busy laughing to catch him every time and so he ended up on the floor more often than not.

the next morning wylan had woken up early with a sore back, jesper was still fast asleep and one glance at the clock told him it would be at least three hours before his husband actually got up.

so out of determination but mostly spite, wylan crept out of bed, got washed and dressed and ventured downstairs to find the skates where jesper had left them in the corridor.

he had given his staff the day off in preparation for the crows dinner that evening so, without the risk of embarrassing himself further infront of a servant, wylan had slipped on the skates.

by the time jesper came downstairs four-and-a-half hours later wylan was skating around the ground floor with confidence much to jespers astonishment and delight.

nina and matthias had shown up not long after that and jes had taken the skates back to show off his moves.

“pleaseeee jes!”

“five more minutes nina!”

nina groaned. matthias grinned, she had wanted a go for the past hour but jesper was somehow still full of energy.

eventually he pulled to a dramatic stop and took a bow before untying the laces and handing them to nina.

she wasnt as smooth as jesper to say the least.

thud. “OW-” and a wide range of swearwords seemed to be her preferred reactions.

matthias got repeatedly swatted and hit away whenever he tried to help her.

“well don’t complain to me when you’re covered in bruises tomorrow”

“you can cover me in bruises later if you like” she winked.

matthias rolled his eyes but went bright red earning a satisfied chuckle from nina.

inej walked over and helped nina to her feet, slipping off her shoes and sliding over the floor in her socks to show nina the correct techniques.

nina copied somewhat successfully, only falling over half as much after that.

then jesper had had a brilliant idea and the five of them spent the next hour gathering every single cushion in the van eck mansion and piling them at the end of its longest corridor.

nina cried and skated towards the pile at full speed, landing in them and bursting into a fit of giggles as jesper jumped ontop of her.

wylan and matthias shared a glance that said ‘i-cannot-believe-we-married-these-literal-children’ before joining in their laughter along with inej.

“no no no no no.” matthias repeated as nina slipped off his shoes.

“yes yes yes yes yes.” she retorted.

matthias suprisingly wasn’t awful.

“it just feels like walking on ice” he’d said.

nina had been positively annoyed at how good matthias was and stuck her foot out when he sped past, her annoyance was replaced with disbelief when he jumped and swirled gracefully to avoid it before plummeting into the mountain of cushions.

inej was next, the shoes were far too big for her and jesper had to lend her two pairs of his fluffiest socks to make sure they didn’t slip off.

but still she skated perfectly, smoothly spinning like she was born to do so.

when they heard a knock at the door she glided eagerly over to let kaz in.

“hello kaz” she grinned.

“hello wraith” he replied fighting the smile that tugged at the corners of his lips, she’d missed that smile.

he tilted his head, she was suspiciously tall, before glancing down at her feet.

“jes got rollerskates.” she said.

“poor wylan.” he said stepping inside.

“hey! im rather good at it actually.” jesper said defensively.

“good at being annoying” wylan added.

inej kept the skates on throughout dinner, mostly because they could see she was happy with them on. and also because everyone had noticed how kaz was mesmerised by her as she slid round the mansion.

“kaz you should have a go!” said jesper when the group had settled by the fire and opened a box of chocolates.

kaz merely raised an eyebrow and waited for the sharpshooter to realise why that would be impossible.

“oh.” jesper said looking to kaz’ cane and bad leg resting on a pile of cushions.

“sorry” jesper gulped, embarrassed at how long it had taken him to remember that his best-friend-of-many-years was disabled.

then his face lit up.

“oh no,” said matthias.

wylan had a similar look of concern “jesper whetever you’re thinking-”

“-is a brilliant idea!” said nina, clearly catching onto his train of thought.

they both stood up and left the room clearly in search of something.

it wasn’t until ten minutes later they reappeared at the doorway slightly out of breath but faces both plastered with mischievous grins.

soon the six of them stood in the corridor and kaz realised what the two of them had planned. his eyes widened.

“absolutely not.” he said.

they had pulled out one of wylans best chairs, some expensive ravkan design that was supposed to be worth half a million kruge.

and it had wheels.

kaz turned around and started to make his way grumpily back to the living room when inej stepped in his way.

“you sit your ass down on that chair kaz or i will steal all coffee and everyone knows without it you’d just wither and die.”

the others laughed but inej was only half joking. kaz knew that and reluctantly set aside his cane and sat down.

“what now?” he said with a scowl.

“you know what.” replied inej.

and with that she grabbed the back of the chair and started pushing him towards the cushions. she still had the rollerskates on as the two of them hurtled along the floor.

inej screamed excitedly and kaz let out a muffled cry as he practically flew out of the chair landing face first in the cushions.

she jumped in a few feet away from him grinning wildly at the look on his face.

he looked… happy.

hair messy, shaking his head and failing to hide a smile. then he started giggling, like a child.

from behind they heard four other sets of running footsteps followed by a clash of thuds and laughs as wylan, jesper, nina and matthias joined them.

none of them made it a big deal that kaz seemed so relaxed, he wouldn’t want the attention. and none of them got too close so they might accidentally touch.

so they stayed, sprawled across the cushions laughing, for what must have been hours.

then as the sun set and they grew more and more drowsy they drifted to sleep.

even kaz brekker, dirtyhands, the bastard of the barrel, dozed off in the company of his friends.

(ig - pcttigrws if someone does fanart of this i’ll love you forever. also gonna post it on ao3 [pcttigrwsfics] )

[nikrangdan]

classmate!sunghoon

pairing: classmate!sunghoon x female reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: you felt like park sunghoon was way, WAY out of your league... what happens when the teacher tells him to move seats and sit next to you?

*didnt proofread

————

becoming friends with park sunghoon was not something you expected to happen this year

throughout high school you had a small group of friends and never really stuck out

so when your teacher told sunghoon to move seats..

the seat happened to be the empty one next to..

guess who *cue the evil laugh*

YOU!!!!

your first thought was

‘this entire year is just gonna be him completely ignoring my existence or awkward interactions’

now you’ve heard of park sunghoon.... its basically a guarantee at your high school

he has this group of friends and theyre labelled as the popular kids i guess you could say

and the only reason he had to move seats in your two hour long class was because he and his friend jake goof off in class too often and your teacher deemed them “too distracting”

so eventually sunghoon was forced to move all the way across the classroom

right next to you

you were shocked to say the least

obviously he was handsome

too handsome to the point where you questioned how someone as good looking as him went to your school

he sighed and got up from his chair next to jake

but he still had a small smile remaining on his face indicating he wasnt that upset about him having to leave his friend

your heart began to beat quicker automatically as he walked towards your desk

even if you didnt have a crush on him like alot of people did, you still felt nervous around popular students like him for some reason

he ran his hand through his hair and sat down next to you, setting his bookbag on the floor next to him

he didnt look at you, nor acknowledge you

Awkward....

but nonetheless the lecture began again and the class sat in silence

taking notes on their laptops or sleeping

there were around 30 people in your class and your seat was in the middle row next to the window so you often gazed outside from the 2nd floor during class

you glanced to your right and noticed sunghoon slouched back in his seat, twirling around a pencil in his hand while his laptop remained open on his desk

it was just a white screen so he didnt take any notes

you were surpised because you knew he had fairly decent grades

you ignored your thoughts and continued taking your own notes

soon enough the bell rang and sunghoon stood up immediately and walked over to jake

‘yup’ you thought. ‘we are definitely not going to be having a single conversation this year.’

fast forward a couple days!!!!

you were sitting in class next to the boy

as normal

and you still have yet to talk to him.. mainly because you never initiated conversations ESPECIALLY when its a really really cute boy

anyways

ur teacher is like

Ok class im assigning a project and ur partner is the person sitting next to u

yay!!!!!! (can u sense the sarcasm)

welp

you sit in silence while everyone in the class starts discussing with their partners

the project is you have to make a presentation on a world issue of your choice

“um...” u start

sunghoon starts pulling out his laptop and binder

“what do you wanna do?”

he doesnt even look you

well!!!!!!

u didnt know sunghoon and his group of friends very well but u definitely thought they were more... friendly than this

its silent for like 5 seconds

“huh? oh sorry did you say something?”

“uh yeah.. i asked what you wanted to do for the project.”

“project?”

God u tried so hard not to laugh

you think he noticed because his cheeks turned a really light shade of pink

he looked so innocent

“yeah we have to make a presentation” you lightly chuckled

he was very amusing without even trying

“oh sorry haha.. i zone out easily”

“its okay.. but its due in less than 2 weeks so”

so you two spent the next hour choosing a topic and working on the project

it was kind of awkward for the first 10 minutes but then you warmed up to eachother

u were lucky that he was an extrovert too

(sunghoon is an extrovert for the sake of this story OK)

u were also lucky that he was smart

it was easy for you to talk to him.. he just felt comfortable

contrary to ur prior belief.. sunghoon was actually a really really cool guy

u used to think he was just a guy

now u think hes a really really cool guy

“can you please stop putting penguin clip art on the slides” you giggle

then he puts parrot clip art instead

“do your work!!!!” he was supposed to keep researching but he was trying to balance his pen on his nose

“shhh y/n... im doing something important.”

you roll your eyes

he was always doing something that was Not work

but you found it entertaining

and he’d make dumb little jokes that made you both hide your faces in your arms on top of the desk to hide your laughter

“hey y/n”

“what”

“what do you call an old snowman”

“i dunno.. snowgramps”

“no.. water”

you both made eye contact before bursting into laughter and then forcing yourselves to be quiet before u got in trouble

but that made everything funnier so you both were just covering your faces while trying so hard not to make a sound

this was so weird

u have never clicked with someone so fast before it honestly felt exciting

you were talking to sunghoon as if you’d been friends with him since birth

Very Very weird because you had only talked to him an hour ago and now u two are acting like besties ?!?!

jake noticed from across the room too

hes like ‘Why is sunghoon having fun without me🙄🙄’

the bell rings and so far you only have 2 slides

“we didnt get anything done” you note as you pack your bag

“yeah yeah i know. we can work on it more tomorrow”

“right.. see you tomorrow” you’re about to head out until jake walks up

“hey bro” he and sunghoon do some kind of made up handshake before he turns to look at you

now you know jake

everyone knows jake

you used to think he was the sweetest out of all their friend group

and he definitely lives up to that!!!

“hey y/n!” he gives u a smile

AWE hes so adorable

“hi” u reply

you were trying to speed up this conversation though so you could go eat lunch with your friend

“hows the project going?” he asks

“bad. sunghoon doesnt know how to do anything.” you deadpanned jokingly

sunghoon looks at you with an offended look that makes you wanna snort

“hey! you’re the one who doesn’t know how to add text to the slide!”

“what the hell sunghoon?! don’t tell him that, it’s embarrassing!” you give him a dirty look before walking out the classroom door with a smile on your face

days passed and you and sunghoon would only speak during that class but whenever you did it would be a mess

“sunghoon, y/n, quiet down! there is no reason for my classroom to be this loud!” your teacher scolds you two after sunghoon slapped his desk after you accidentally snorted

u two had such a weird relationship

u were almost strangers outside this one class but besties when u were in it

jake noticed too

one time he asked sunghoon during lunch why ur relationship was what it was

“i dont know.. thats just how we are” he answered

but jake kind of suspected sunghoon had a crush on u

*wiggles eyebrows*

it had only been a week but jake was determined to set u up together

“y/n you look cold, heres sunghoons jacket!”

“y/n sunghoon needs help with his homework, can you maybe do something about that..”

“sunghoon, y/n looks sad go give her a hug”

needless to say it worked!!!!

because a week after you presented your 2 weeks worth project

sunghoon asked u on a date

YUPPPPPP

let me recite how it went

u were walking out of class together because jake wasnt there that day

sunghoons bookbag was slung over one shoulder and u were stood next to him with both hands on ur straps

“hey.. do u wanna maybe go grab something to eat with me for dinner..? or something” he quickly asked

“what, like a date?” you joke

“uh.. yeah” he replied looking down at u

u stop in your tracks

WHA

No way

“wait what? seriously?” you look up at him with wide eyes

“yes u little munchkin” he pinches your cheeks exaggeratedly and pulls them to make your face sway everywhere

u swat them off so fast

“um.. okay” u answer and ur face heats up

you cant even look him in the eye

like u cant say u DIDNT see this coming but it was still a shock

“awe is y/n blushing” he teases

“go away stupid”

yeah he doesnt go away

ANYWAYS u are the cutest couple ever

everyone wants to be u two so bad!

couple goals literally

jake is so proud of himself honestly

whenever u get into a silly little argument his rebuttal is always

“remind me who got u the best boyfriend ever? thats right, me. dont try me y/n”

and ur like

“ooohhh jakey im so scareddd”

he cannot stand u

but Yeah sunghoon bestest bf ever

takes u on dates whenever u want to

makes u laugh very much

almost too much

and ur parents LOVE him

mhm sunghoon very awesome guy