#especially someone he sees himself as a caretaker/protector figure

[happyk44]

Something something Percy wishing he loved Nico in the same way because he can't stand the idea of hurting him, even though Nico has never needed Percy to love him in the same way or even to love him at all.

[angelsdean]

Thinking a lot abt John and Mary's relationship this morning, specifically the "their marriage wasn't perfect until she died" of it all, coupled with what we know abt Heaven's interference and manipulation of their relationship, how they couldn't stand each other until Heaven intervened. Like one would think, okay Heaven intervenes and now there's no resistance, smooth sailing, and then, oh she's dead, well she already served her purpose, no need for John to be infatuated with her anymore. But that's not what happens. They have friction throughout their marriage while she's alive. Then they have the perfect marriage after her death. And like !!! I have so many thoughts abt this. Startng with:

John's whole revenge quest is also crucial to Heaven's agenda. It wasn't just about matchmaking Mary and John, it was about setting off the dominoes for this entire path. Which is why it's important to Heaven that John views their marriage as perfect after and remembers Mary as this idealized mother figure. These things are what fuel John's quest for revenge. She is supposedly his true love, cruelly taken from him and their children, so now he must avenge her and put this quest first, before everything. And all of this is so crucial to Heaven's future plans. It's important to Heaven that Dean and Sam have the childhood they have. Especially Dean, who is meant to be their sword. It's important that John raises them to be soldiers. It's important that Dean has all that sense of responsibility and guilt placed on him as a young age. It's important that Dean is made to be a caretaker and protector. Because ultimately that's the stuff they want to use to manipulate Dean into doing their bidding and saying Yes. They let Dean be molded into Heaven's perfect vessel. He's raised to already see himself as a weapon, as the one who needs to protect others (eventually the whole world), and also as someone expendable. John places a gun in Dean's small hands and expects him to put himself in front of Sam, and Dean learns to put the lives of others before his own. Now of course, Heaven / Chuck also seem to foolishly miss that by Dean being raised like this it also means the one thing he's going to really push against is the idea of killing his own brother. And like Heaven, John also makes this mistake when he tells Dean he may have to kill Sam.

Okay now the second part of my thoughts on why Heaven's manipulations continue to influence John so strongly after Mary's death: it's because Mary is no longer there to fight it. When she was alive I think her own free will would have been pushing up against Heaven's manipulations, as would John's, leading to constant conflict. If Heaven were able to simply "make" them act how they wanted then their marriage would have always been perfect. But we know it's not. We know they fought. We know that on at least one occasion John left. And I just think that while she was alive, both of them had their free will constantly clashing with Heaven's agenda. And the living, breathing, contradictory and complex Mary made it difficult for John to ignore her flaws and how the two of them didn't quite fit together. Once she was dead though, and in the complicated grief of it all, it became easier for John (and Heaven) to smooth over the memory of her. She became to John what she always was to Heaven: Mother Mary. She became the perfect, pure, saintly mother figure. John no longer had to reckon with who she really was, and Heaven no longer had to fight two sets of free will revolting against each other.

[jadewing-realms]

i don't know if there's a specific term for the thing when... you're so used to being told you're too much? too loud, too quiet, too stubborn, a pushover, too excited, too cold, too close, too distant... so you just kinda give up doing anything without explicitly being told to because you just can't figure out where the balance is?

especially physical affection. what's 'too much'? when is it okay to hold hands? how do you know when you're allowed to hug someone? gods forbid you give someone a forehead kiss at the wrong time and make them uncomfortable. you don't know how to intuit what anyone needs at any given time so... you figure you should just... not move. unless someone specifically asks you to.

whatever That is, it's how i imagine Naven is. stuck in perma-freeze response, unless he has a designated Role to Play. he's been molded into the model support system. he enjoys making others feel good. he likes seeing them smile. feel safe. he always asks how others are feeling; he always asks for their permission before doing anything that might affect them. he's thoughtful, quiet, agreeable. he never asks for things for himself, and he certainly never takes up space... it's been too long since he had permission to. he's always had to be the caretaker, the older sibling, the protector, the adult, mature, rational, self-sufficient, the perfect island content with simply being ground for others to walk on.

i think this is why Astarion catches his attention right away. the vampire seems so... fearless. not in the usual sense, the heroic sense, but in that he's not afraid to be loud. to say what he's thinking. to take up space and a lot of it. and he's funny and confident and charismatic even when he's being an asshole and Naven is a little in awe of it, muzzled and afraid to misstep as he is.

how does one go about being so unapologetically flawed? he wants to know.

then of course... he learns more. glimpses cracks in the mask. learns of the fears behind the facade, learns that what he'd been witnessing wasn't Astarion saying what he was thinking but saying what he believed others expected or wanted and oh, Naven understands. and now he swears he will do anything in his power to help Astarion feel as safe and respected and loved, truly loved, as he can. he's good at that. and... it works. Naven is used to feeling blind to what others want from him, he tries to account for what he can't see so nobody ever feels unheard or unseen. Astarion is used to having any and all his boundaries crossed, he's relearning how it feels to be treated as an individual. he's also not interested in a protector or guardian... he wants an equal. something neither is used to having but both crave like they crave air to breathe.

sitting by the fire at camp, Naven asks if it's okay to lean on Stari's shoulder, maybe even hold his hand. some other time, Astarion is upset and is surprised when Naven asks whether he needs comfort or advice or space. even more so when he asks for space and Naven accepts without question or second-thought and simply waits until Astarion is ready.

at night, a nightmare and anxiety attack leaves Naven a frayed mess and he dares to ask for a hug for himself for the first time in more than a century and gods is Astarion more than willing to give him one. later, Naven feels guilty for being frustrated about something and Astarion tells him to let himself be angry for once. that nobody will hate him for it.

Stari says he needs a little excitement, asks if Naven would like to visit the market street with him; Naven's had a burst of muse and needs to be alone to write. they're both fine with this and hope the other enjoys themselves for the day. Naven asks if he'd like a kiss for luck; Astarion accepts it and gets Bardic Inspiration to schmooze some vendors later, I dunno.

ask and receive. a cycle of love and respect. giving each other the freedom and space to just... be. exist, as they are, together. over time, they get to learn not only about each other, but about themselves, what they like, what they don't. and that it's okay to speak up about both.

[antisociallilbrat]

Bill reads to me like someone who will explore his gender in his 20s and end up either being an enby or transfem. He put himself as everyone's caretaker and protector and pushed all thoughts of himself away because he had to focus on taking care of His People. Then once he's in his 20s and his friends convince him that they don't need that from him anymore, he kinda has no idea who he is and starts learning himself and exploring all the things he never let himself explore before. Gender being one such thing. And all his friends are so happy to finally watch him become himself.

The euphoria I felt when I read this. Bill is so busy taking care of his losers that he loses his sense of self in it. And when they finally convince him that they’re okay, and tell him he’s allowed to help himself and not constantly worry about them he’s like ,,,, who even am I?

Okay wait I really love your thoughts and I have to add more:

So Bill, with the Loser’s love and support, goes on this self learning journey. Just figuring out what he likes, how he wants to express himself. And I see the other Losers helping him out. Like Bev painting his nails when she does her and Richie’s, Richie letting him borrow some of his band clothes. Actually Richie and Bev would be the most helpful in this. Especially when he started questioning his gender.

Like one night him Bev and Richie are sitting around, getting high, and Bev convinces the guys to let her dress them up. Richie is doing it for the gags (but I would argue he has he/they energy) but for Bill,,,he’s like wait, i actually like this. This being Bev having him in a black mini skirt and his makeup done up.

This becomes like a thing after that, whenever he hangs out with Bev and Richie, he ends up in “women” clothing. He thinks that Bev and Richie thinks he’s just doing it for the joke, but they’ve caught on, they know it’s more than that for Bill.

Okay this is getting long winded and I need to cut myself short. I just really love this thought and thank you so much for sharing it! I love the idea of Bill exploring his gender, he’s just like me Fr <3

[forever-yours-simdate]

Ahhh so happy to see asks are open! 💕

What would the guys do if MC gave them a homemade meal to take care of them?

Tama

He'll be genuinely surprised, very used to having to provide meals for himself even when he was younger. He'd feel really awkward, especially if it's just him eating, and might even be a bit nervous as he picks at his food. He's usually a pretty quiet guy but not quite as... drawn in as he is during this moment. While tension during a meal is something he's used to, this is... different. He doesn't like wasting food, and isn’t really picky either, so he'll eat anything. But, he'd be really touched if you make something he really likes, since he doesn't ever let that sort of stuff show if he has any say in it. Will thank you afterwards, and will think about places to take you to dinner in the near future.

Max

Particular about what he eats (he has a figure to maintain!) AND picky on top of that, good luck trying to figure out what he'll even be willing to consider putting in his mouth. If you make something he hates, he'll tell you explicitly and refuse to eat it. If you do manage to figure out something he likes, he'll be pretty smug and tease you about how you must be paying so much attention to him (which, he's preening under the care). While he'll be surprised the first time you do it, he gets over his shock immediately (Who wouldn't want to care of him like that? ... Even though its been a while since he last ate something homemade from someone else...). Other than that he doesn't really consider cooking a homemade a particularly important action. (But... the fact this has him feeling even a little fluttery shows it affects him much more than it would coming from anyone else).

Psy

What a treat! He'd see it as very cute, you trying to "return the favor" of his care by imitating him (<- delulu). He'll deem it unnecessary, and ask lots of questions about what you made. This is mostly because he's very particular about what he eats, moreso for health reasons rather than tastes. If it has anything he can't eat in it, he'll decline with a sympathetic smile, but offer your food back to you. Watching you eat a tasty meal is enough to make him feel full. If he can eat it, he'll do so happily, but remind you that it's unnecessary and that he's more than happy to do the cooking for the two of you.

Lake

Honestly feeding him is probably going to become a regular occurrence. Not that he doesn't appreciate it! (the thought alone is enough to move him to tears) its just... his regular meals are decided day-to-day, and he only can afford so much, so he's often stuck with just a sandwich, some crackers, or small snack tray for a whole day, and can get fast food if he's lucky. (Good luck cooking anything at his place. His shitty little kitchenette is baren of both tools and food.) So feeding him regularly yourself is essential if you want him to live past his 20s. Will devour anything you make him, even if it's burnt or has something he's allergic to, he'll eat it all (and will feel so guilty if he throws it up later). You're probably gonna have to even feed him yourself lest he gets a stomach ache or chokes in his fevor. He'll try to return the favor but... don't expect anything too fancy... or tasty for that matter.

Lycoris

Would be kind of bummed out because he enjoys the process of cooking together and buying ingredients together (also so he can be there and help you right away in case of an accident) but will appreciate it immensely nonetheless. Usually he takes on the role of a protector/caretaker but... it's also very nice to be taken care of! Will definitely be extra clingy (aka, silently hovering over your shoulder, sweeping any task out of your hands to do for you if he's confident enough about how to do it) for at least a couple days after. Will be distressed if you hurt yourself while making the meal, and ask that you never do it again.

Bonus Cupid!

The domesticity of the act has him melting. He brightens up immediately, with an amused smile. He'll eat with joy, and joke "If we get married, will you do this for me more often?". Might be a bit disillusioned if you make him something he doesn't like, but takes it in stride. Making him something he likes might not be the best idea unless you want to reinforce certain ideals he has.

[liebgotts-lovergirl]

Hiya Bestie! 💕 For the director's cut game, I've been dying to know about Joe's relationship with Alix's friend group. There was a little mention of him interacting with them while Alix was gone, and I'd love to know more about their dynamic if you're down to share :)

Ooh this is such a good question!! It's gonna be addressed much more in later chapters too bc I'm a sucker for psychology!! 🤭

Liebgott + Skip + Don Relationship Psychoanalysis below the cut!!

So Joe is an interesting case bc he grew up SURROUNDED by family & we see him assume the role of Caretaker multiple times throughout the show, most notably with Tipper, when Tab gets gored, when Alley is wounded, & at the concentration camp later on.

The caring side of him is automatic-- it derives from being the oldest of so many siblings, the man of the family when his dad's at work. He's always been the Protector, the Caretaker etc.

He is as fierce a lover as he is a fighter bc both come from the same place: his compassionate heart! He can't help but care about people and as Eugene Sledge wrote in his book, it's the ones with empathy that suffer the most during wartime.🥺

As the war progresses, we see Joe starts to go against his own nature. We see him learn to shut the kinder side of himself down. He has to-- As Winters wrote in his book, Joe was one of Easy Company's "designated killers".

Imagine for one second the weight of that label on a person. You need someone executed, you call Joe. Joe is the one Resistance members use as a threat during interrogations-- he's the attack dog, he kills on command.

What does a normal human being have to do to become psychologically okay with that? How much of himself did he lose? What does a job like that do to a person over time?

Alix & Joe are very similar but they fork in that regard:

Alix lets her emotions lead as an act of rebellion against a system that has tried to rob her of them + tries to pull away from that label of "Killer" whereas Joe shuts down & leans into it. He does what he has to do. He is a good soldier.

He lets his anger (which is really just compounded self-loathing) drive him, becoming a bit of a Lone Wolf in the process.

The angrier Joe becomes, the more he lashes out.

The more he lashes out, the more he hates himself.

And the cycle just continues.

He knows it & he HATES it. There's a reason he abandons his old name in favor of an old family nickname, tries to avoid the Easy Co. reunions at all costs, & refuses to talk about the war until he's practically on his deathbed.

Joe DESPISES the person he used to be, the person the war made him.

AND THEN THERE'S OUR BELOVED SUNSHINE BOY, SKIP.

So Skip starts in a similar position but ends up in a VERY different place!

Like Joe, he grew up as the Caretaker figure in his family. He didn't face any discrimination growing up tho-- which obviously had a major effect on Joe-- but there's no doubt Skip is upset about the suffering he sees throughout the war. Any decent human being would be, ESPECIALLY someone with a heart as big as Skip's.

BUT unlike Joe, we never see Skip angry or upset for long.

Skip's outlook is UNFAILINGLY positive bc he knows if he allows himself to sink into that place of rage even for a moment, he'll never get out.

And as an NCO, Skip feels a responsibility for the morale of his squad. He knows people are depending on him, he knows the younger guys are watching him, so when he feels down, he makes the choice to lift others up instead.

Even in his letters, when he writes about feeling down, it's very quick mentions here & there. He refuses to let himself have more than a second or two of anger or self-pity BUT at the same time, does not allow the war to strip him of his humanity or compassion. He's been an optimist his whole life & even in the worst of times, he refuses to let the war take that from him.

SO

Subconsciously, when Joe looks at Skip, he sees the person he could have been, if life had been kinder. If he had made the same kinds of choices instead of hardening his heart to survive.

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood", so to speak.

And he wants to protect that in Skip at all costs.

In a similar vein, subconsciously, with Don, I think Joe sees his little brother -- This carefree, mischievous, bright spark of a boy with adventure in his soul. Joe's younger siblings got to have a childhood-- he never really did. So he sees the same light in Don that he sees in his younger siblings, & as he did growing up, Joe will shoulder whatever burdens he needs to in order to protect that.

Thank you so much for the Ask, my Dovely!! Sorry this kinda turned into a book lol💖

[aiyexayen]

The ChengXian/WangXian parallel gifsets about the sad boat rides with Wen Ning made me think, once again, about how Wei Ying was worried about being the Jiang Cheng in his relationship with Lan Zhan.

Wei Ying just had so few models of relationship, and only two real models of a serious relationship involving himself--Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli. He saw himself as a caretaker in each of them.

Even Jiang Yanli, ultimately, though there was certainly more give and take there. He only accepted a very specific kind of caretaking from her, though, and we see how fraught that was in the way Yu-furen shamed Jiang Yanli for it.

But Jiang Cheng was the most complicated. He and Wei Ying were the Yunmeng Shuangjie. Twin Heroes. Both of them strong male cultivators. Their relationship was such a carefully orchestrated imbalance. Wei Ying had to take care of Jiang Cheng even to the point of making sure Jiang Cheng didn’t feel taken care of. He was stronger, but he had to make sure Jiang Cheng didn’t feel weaker.

And at the same time, he had to be able to have his best friend and brother and navigate the lines of teasing and boasting that came with those dynamics and also with his natural brash and outgoing and free-spirited personality. It’s not something that weighed particularly heavy on him until later on, of course; it’s just How Things Were.

But Lan Zhan being Wei Ying's true equal was a heady taste of something new, something he was desperate for.

Someone he didn’t have to take care of in all those tricky, sticky ways. Someone who could understand him from the outside. That equality between them--of swords and strength and wit--formed so much of their early relationship. The ways Wei Ying and Lan Zhan excelled differently weren’t seen as anything but surface-level differences, cultivation styles. They could choose to take care of each other on their own (like in the Xuanwu cave) but there were no expectations except that which they set for themselves.

The best cohesive example I can think of is the situation at Dafan Mountain. Jiang Cheng has taken off after Wei Ying, to come and find his troublemaking brother and bring him home, ostensibly being the one to wrangle and care for his brother and best friend and someday-second. But as soon as he finds them, Wei Ying is clearly the one in charge. Jiang Cheng gets locked into a shield barrier, given a verbal half-teasing pat on the head, and left behind. Wei Ying goes off with Lan Zhan to find the source of the problems and their new level of partnership is beautifully put on display through their fight (other things happen in that fight, too, but that’s another post).

Jiang Cheng was never allowed to truly take care of Wei Ying. His parents never let him. Wei Ying never let him. He tried, all the time, most of all when he gave himself up to the Wen soldiers. But even that was immediately undone, turned back around on him.

Wei Ying never figured out how to attain any semblance of true equilibrium in his relationship with Jiang Cheng, even after everything at Lotus Pier, especially after everything at Lotus Pier, either before or after the core transfer. Maybe if he had, things would have been different. Maybe if he had, he wouldn’t have sacrificed his core to begin with.

It’s debatable how much Wei Ying expected to keep living after his core was gone. It’s even more debatable how much he really thought about anything past his own desperation in the moment, about all the promises broken with that single act, about how that would affect his relationship with anyone else. That doesn’t seem like a very Wei Ying thing to sit and think about.

Regardless, once the core was gone, he and Lan Zhan weren't equals. It messed up his relationship with Jiang Cheng, too, of course. The resentful energy was its own kind of strength but it couldn’t make up the difference in any way that counted. It just complicated everything by a thousand times and added in all kinds of new problems.

Even though Jiang Cheng had his core and Wei Ying had nothing but the tortured screams of the lost and vengeful echoing in his head, Wei Ying was still the caretaker there.

Don’t let Jiang Cheng find out the secret. Don’t let Lan Zhan become embroiled in it or expose the secret. Make sure Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli and Lotus Pier are okay. Lift Jiang Cheng up as a leader. Win the war. Apparently still be alive welp didn’t see that coming. Protect them all. Even if it means leaving.

But as much as he scrambled for strengths and leaned on his demonic cultivation he was still weak. Able to wipe out entire outposts of Wen agents yet repeatedly brought to a point where Lan Zhan could kill him easily and we know that the only way he could hope to match him would be to use this dangerous thing that's eating his soul, so shit could really get out of hand. Which wasn't really winning in the end. Demonic cultivation for him in general wasn’t strength so much as carefully-applied weakness.

Not to mention his reputation. They got so far off-balance where reputation and social standing was concerned.

Wei Ying’s merits had been contentious throughout his life--on the one hand, they're all he had to elevate himself beyond the need for the Jiangs' charity, or anyone's charity, as his status as family was so fraught and inconsistent. Being the best made all of that a moot point as much as it could be. And it also made him able to take care of said family, fulfilling all manner of "repay debt" vibes and "I'm obsessed with justice and protection" vibes.

On the other hand, they were definitely part of what made things so difficult with Jiang Cheng. Wei Ying’s reputation outclassing Jiang Cheng’s as a prodigy, a swordsman, a hero, even as he balanced it out by getting a simultaneous reputation for goofing off and being irresponsible. He did his best to make them complementary even though they were never really allowed to be.

But Jiang Cheng said it himself when he visited Wei Ying at the Burial Mounds--as soon as he started walking a different path, all of his merits and his skills and his reputation were turned upside down and used to make him a more effective villain.

So suddenly he didn’t even have any good social standing. He was mistrusted and then hated and reviled. On a number of levels, he could handle that, because it was more important to him that everyone who wasn’t him was okay. But it put him at complete odds with the great Hanguang-Jun, which was definitely something he made a point of noting more than once so we know it really, really mattered to him.

And that knowledge crept further and further in, between the war ending, things going back to some semblance of normal when he...couldn’t, and eventually him ending up in the Burial Mounds.

It was inevitable. He was the weaker one between himself and Lan Zhan, in every possible way. He knew of only one way that could go down.

It's a fear that got tangled up along with the rest of his paranoias, insecurities, traumas, resolutions, and twisted certainties pre-timeskip. On top of that, he lost a central piece of his identity and had no idea how to replace it.

If he isn't himself, who else can he be? Who else might he turn into? Someone who needs to be taken care of? Someone who might have his agency circumvented by a stronger person who thinks he knows better?

He sure did that to Jiang Cheng, and he never really had to own up to that piece of it. He never really regretted it either but he also sure didn't want to be on the other end of it.

Aside from that, Wei Ying just didn't know how to not be the strongest person. Being equal is the closest he’d ever come. He's never been allowed to be weak and taken care of unless he's play-acting and isn't that fucking heartbreaking? Fuck.

So who is he without that?

He still fought with the strengths he had and pretended to have the rest of them. And in one last great act of being the protector and caretaker, ran off to the Burial Mounds.

We do get to see Wei Ying and Lan Zhan working in tandem to bring back Wen Ning, and even though Wei Ying stumbles at the end (for the first time ever, I think, into Lan Zhan’s arms?), he does it successfully. They’re still able to work together, in spite of everything that’s happened, especially when Wei Ying is leaning into his actual talents. Even if Wei Ying’s weakness is still looming over his shoulder, as we see later.

Being with the Wens, living a simple life, leaning into his strengths, being part of a community and family, taking time to work on his scholarly/inventor hobbies, all this served to calm a lot of those fears and also conveniently take Wei Ying out of the scenarios and away from the relationships that caused them. It offered him tentative new pieces of identity to grab.

But then, of course, he lost that, too.

Post-timeskip, Wei Ying is thrust right back into a world where he has to finally face those issues. Whether you take it as he still has no core, or he has Mo Xuanyu’s really weak core, he’s not doing so great where that’s concerned.

He still has strengths. We’re not actually shown any indications that this man is weak at any point, not truly. He has a better grasp on the situation at Mo Manor than all of those precious Lan babies put together.

But we are shown that he uses a bunch of hands-on crafty tricks, talismans and spells and such. And, interestingly, in counterpoint we’re shown Lan Zhan descending from the heavens with his qin. Wei Ying doesn’t use a dizi here yet (let alone sword), and Lan Zhan doesn’t use Bichen. I do think that’s lovely.

However, Lan Zhan is still incredibly strong, in more ways than just physically: his reputation is strong, his presence is strong, his confidence is high, his mastery of the qin is unparalleled, he’s had sixteen more years to grow up and develop his golden core.

From the framing, and Wei Ying’s reactions, and the Lan juniors’ reactions, it’s pretty clear that’s the impression Wei Ying has. There’s an imbalance between them (along with alllll the other reasons he might have to want to stay away from/keep Lan Zhan out of things). He doesn’t see them as complementary, just as not-the-same.

He meets Jiang Cheng next and, hey, Jiang Cheng is actually really strong now, too (also he always was but meh). Again, Wei Ying uses his tricks to outwit and outmaneuver the situation at hand. Again, he’s struck by the impressive image of someone entering the scene like a badass.

And what a deliciously awful carousel of conflicting feelings. Pride? Despair? Longing? Love? Annoyance? Delight? Relief? Pain? Fear?

But as far as strength goes, clearly Jiang Cheng has it in buckets, now. Which means even if they still had a relationship, Jiang Cheng surely wouldn't even be the Jiang Cheng in it anymore. What a horrible realisation.

It can’t be helped much by the fact that Wei Ying almost lets himself get run through and Lan Zhan enters the scene to fucking save him. Even if it’s from the kid we know he just bested.

And that’s the back and forth we see at first. Wei Ying proving his strength and his character but the framing and his reactions proving that he’s still caught in the idea that Lan Zhan is stronger and better than him.

Lan Zhan is beloved. Lan Zhan is strong. Lan Zhan would never accidentally murder people he loved more than life itself. (OKay I won’t get into that but tell me he didn’t think that at any point I dare you)

He accepts it and plays it off as not a big deal, but it clearly is. In his rare serious moments, we see that.

So post-timeskip, Wei Ying has to figure out who he is and then how he can be said person. A significant part of the character and relationship development post-timeskip is about that.

He once again finds himself exploring uncharted territory of building relationship dynamics he’s never experienced with Lan Zhan. It started because he realised they were equals. It can’t develop further until he acknowledges that they still are.

He figures out how to be weak with Lan Zhan first, that it's safe and allowed and okay. There’s nothing wrong with being taken care of. It doesn’t have to define him and it doesn’t have to be about agency or about all the twisty psychological junk that was all wrapped up in his familial relationships at all.

Then he figures out that he still has the capacity to take care of someone like Lan Zhan back, that he’s still able to be needed, and not just someone to follow around and protect.

Wei Ying has strengths, strengths that were always there and always part of him as well as new ways he's grown and changed. He’s an inventor, he’s a genius, he’s a prodigy, he has his talismans and his music and his people skills and his teaching ability and his empathy and his heart.

All this definitely comes to a head on the steps of Jinlintai, by which point it feels like one of the only remaining imbalances that Wei Ying feels so keenly is their status, which of course Lan Zhan snuffs out utterly romantically.

It’s even more poignant that that moment comes right after Wei Ying gets Suibian back. And he's not nearly as good with it--Lan Zhan has to protect him multiple times in that fight and then of course he gets stabbed. But the point is still made, that he was still able to fight, and even his failures with the sword just drive home that this isn't who he is now. And that's okay.

By the time they're at the Burial Mounds again, Wei Ying has accepted the way they work as a team and that they can be complementary. And they fight flawlessly.

I love that growth for him.

He absolutely ends up being the Jiang Cheng, in a number of ways. He runs after Lan Zhan when he’s drunk to keep him out of trouble. He ends up left behind to take care of defenseless people while Lan Zhan runs off and has an epic sword fight in an evil fog bank.

He has to be taken from Lotus Pier, unconscious, in a boat, and is held so preciously in Lan Zhan’s arms.

But. Turns out it’s not so bad when the person you’re being Jiang Cheng for isn’t Wei Ying.

I swear this is not throwing shade at Wei Ying.

But he figures out, slowly, how to actually have a relationship built on even ground, as equals, in spite of being unequal in all the ways he used to think mattered. And he only manages it with someone once he’s on the weaker side of it.

I just think that’s super interesting.

And I think it sets a precedent for Wei Ying to understand the flaws in his old dynamic with Jiang Cheng. Especially once there aren’t secrets between them.

Everything has to change, anyway. Everything has already changed, almost two decades ago, and it isn’t going back. It can’t ever go back. Everything they were to each other was bound up in Jiang Yanli’s presence, in promises long broken, in dreams long dead, in a future that has already proved to not be real. In the old Lotus Pier, a lot of it, since they never really moved on from that, either, even back then.

Jiang Cheng has grown up. He’s raised a kid. He’s raised and trained disciples. He’s been a sect leader for over a decade and a half. He’s been to other people what he never could be to Wei Ying.

He’s also proven that he still wants his brother to fix things, still expects him to be able to. Still wants to fight, still knows how to cry. Still acknowledges fragmented pieces of their lost dynamic. Probably more of the healthy ones than Wei Ying ever has, too.

Jiang Cheng still, even in the wake of learning about the golden core, even after everything he’s built and has become, acknowledges Wei Ying as a strong person. As someone as strong as he is, if not stronger in many ways. As having the capacity of an older brother.

But then, Jiang Cheng was always able to conceptualise a world where he and Wei Ying were equals, complementary if not evenly matched, just as much as Lan Zhan was.

It wasn’t a fantasy that Wei Ying indulged him in. It was a reality that Wei Ying himself didn’t know how to accept and kept at a distance, carefully juggling too many separate parts of a whole he couldn’t allow to come together until they all crashed down.

But he’s been on the other side of it now and maybe it’s enough. Maybe he can take what he’s learned in building/rebuilding his relationship with Lan Zhan and apply it to other people. Especially Jiang Cheng.

And maybe Jiang Cheng has been a sect leader and an uncle long enough to not let Wei Ying get away with shit.

[tumblebee-the-smol-bean]

hey, if you're not too busy, maybe secretly regressor logan getting so overstressed from planner changes and schedules that he slips right in front of roman in his room???💕

Thank you so much for the prompt first of all! I’m sorry it took me so long to answer.

Too much work, not enough sleep

Cg Roman Regressor Logan

Logan tapped his pencil against his glasses. He was so tired but also so close to being done with Thomas’s schedule. He took a second to look up from his work to the clock and sighed, he’d been working for well over fourteen hours now, but it was fine, he didn’t technically need food, even if he was really craving some Crofters right now...NO. No that could wait until he finished the schedule and he was almost done, he just needed to- “Hello your royal nerdness!” Great, Roman had dropped in and now he was interrupting Logan’s work. Just what he needed right now. He rolled his eyes and tried not to scream at Princey to just leave him alone. Instead he said in a calm voice, “I am quite busy at the moment Roman. Please take your business elsewhere for now.”

Roman scoffed and Logan flinched a bit. “Well you don’t have to be so rude about it. I just came to tell you that the plan for next week is changing.”

Logan froze. No. NO. he couldn’t have said that. He was so close to being done he wanted to cry. Big boys don’t cry, he tried to remind himself. Big Logan had to fix this, he couldn’t afford to cry and regress and throw a tantrum over a simple schedule change, Even if that’s exactly what he wanted to do. Besides, Roman was right there, he could control this, he had to. So he sighed and turned to him, setting down his pencil.  “What nature of schedule changes are we talking about?”

Roman grinned and plopped a few scattered pages of what looked more to be doodles than written out plans. 

“Well I’m just so glad you asked! You see Thomas has just been so bored lately and that is no fun at all, especially not for me, so I decided we’re going to enter daydream mode a few times to help solve this pesky little problem! Oh! I’m also helping him come up with a new song, it’s going to be sooooo good when we’re done!”

As Roman rambled on Logan became more and more frantic, shuffling through his papers and Roman’s doodles and trying to figure out where to put them. No, no no nononononono. This would shake up the entire schedule! He’d have to completely re-write the planner! 

He tugged at his hair in frustration as tears welled up in his eyes and he began to feel himself slip. NO. not right now! Never in front of the others!

Roman paused his rant when he saw that Logan was obviously distressed. “Logan, are you alright? You look upset.” “FINE!” Logan managed as he tried to usher Roman out the door. “M’ fine! Go ‘way!”

Roman definitely wasn’t leaving now. Logan seemed really upset. He turned back around instead of going out the door like Logan clearly wanted him to.  “Pocket protector you do not seem to be ‘gucci’ so to speak are you sure-”

And thats when Logan broke. It was all too much and the stress of the last several hours along with his exhaustion and sudden panic over the new planner changes and not being able to get Roman to leave crashed down on him and he fully regressed.  “GO ‘WAY!” he screeched before crumpling into a ball on the floor and beginning to sob.

“Whoa!” Roman quickly shut the door behind him, figuring Logan wouldn’t want the others to see him like this but he didn’t leave. Logan clearly needed some help. Instead he crouched down next to him and rested a hand on his back.

“Logan what’s the matter?” he asked softly, trying to figure out the root of the problem so he could fix it. But Logan only wailed harder.  “S-S-so many changes! nd’ you not supposed to be here when m’ like this!”

Roman was puzzled, why was Logan talking like that? He was normally extremely well spoken and used big words Roman didn’t even understand half the time. 

“What do you mean’like this’?” he asked instead of commenting on his speech. 

“Like...like when m’ small.” he sniffled and clung onto Roman, his small side winning over and just wanting comfort and affection and to forget about all the stressful stuff big him had to deal with.

“When you’re....Oooh...” Roman was finally struck with the realization of what was going on.

“Are you regressed Lolo?”

Logan looked up in shock before slowly nodding his head. How had Roman known? he hadn’t even known before he practically broke his computer doing research on it.

Roman smiled. “That’s alright bud, Janus regresses too and sometimes I help Remus look after him. Do you want me to watch you for a bit?”

Logan was trying to take in several peices of information at once. One, Roman didn’t think this was weird. Two, Janus regressed as well, and three....Roman...was offering to look after him? He had always had what if thoughts in regards to having someone to act as a caretaker towards him when regressed but he normally pushed them aside and ignored them. Afterall, who would want to watch him?

But here Roman was, soft smile and outstretched hand and Logan couldn’t help but to launch himself into his waiting arms and whisper sniffle, “Really?”

Roman cocked his head to the side and smoothed down Logan’s hair, “Really buddy, I don’t mind.” he smiled and the answer caused Logan to practically melt out of sheer happiness. “Can you tell me how old you are though so I know how to take care of you?” Roman had only ever helped out Remus when watching Jan but had never done this on his own. However he did remember that Janus had an age range he could regress within that often changed, and with it how Remus took care of him did as well.

Logan has to think for a second. It’s rather hard for him to tell sometimes, but Roman is patient and eventually he held up three fingers.

“You’re three?” he asked to double check, Logan nodded softly but didn’t say anything else, still a bit shy.

Roman smiled wide and hefted him up into his arms. causing him to squeal in surprise that soon morphed into excitement.

“Can you tell me what made you regress little prince?” he asked first and foremost. Janus sometimes regressed just for fun but he could be triggered sometimes when he was upset and considering Logan’s outburst Roman assumed it was the later.

Logan cooed happily at the nickname before frowning a bit and whining softly, pressing his face into Roman’s tunic.

“Lots a work...almos finish nd’ then it changed!” he sounded really upset and Roman realized his fault.

He rubbed Logan’s back and sighed. “I’m sorry little one, I should have talked to you before, we can save the daydreaming for next week.” The longer he looked at Logan’s papers he started to realize he hadn’t seen him out all day.

 “Sweet little prince,” he began, successfully gaining Logan’s attention. “Have you been working all day? I didn’t see you come down to eat.”

Logan nodded. “Fouwteen hours, twenty seven minutes nd six seconds”

Roman tried and failed not to look shocked. “Well we can’t have that! That’s much too long for little princes to be working!”

Logan looks surprised at this, he always worked like that. Coffee, computer, three or four hours of sleep and a small snack then repeat. “i’ is?”

Roman shook his head he was definitely going to have a talk with big Logan about his work habits. “Yes, but we can talk about it more when you’re big again, for now we need to get some food in you.”

He makes sure Logan is well supported before carrying him downstairs, luckily it was late so Logan didn’t make a fuss like he would have had he thought there was a possibility of anyone seeing him while regressed. Instead he just swung his feet when Roman sat him on the counter to open up the fridge and looked around. He wasn’t usually in the rest of the mindscape when he was small. Stay in his room and his secret stayed hidden. He only came out when he needed to use the restroom and even then it was a mad dash.

Roman finished preparing some mac n cheese for him and set it down in front of him along with one of Jan’s old sippy cups that he didn’t tend to use, but it was decorated in stars and planets and seemed perfect for Logan.

He looked at it for a second before bouncing excitedly when he saw the space pattern “Staws!”

“Yes baby, stars.” Roman chuckled before kissing his forehead and taking him to the table to eat.

He was still a bit shy to use his sippy cup in front of Roman but he assured Logan that he’d seen Janus use them a billion times and sometimes even bottles when he was very tiny so he shrugged and drank the juice contents. He also ate his macaroni and made a bit of a mess but Roman just cleaned it up with a small smile.

“Alright Star, I think it’s bedtime for you.” he tutted as he scooped him up.

“Noooooooo, don wanna sleep.” Apparently big Logan and small Logan had that in common.

“Yeeeeeeeeees” Roman replied as he carried him up to his room. “little boys need their sleep and I happen to know that this little boy hasn’t slept alot as of late.”

Logan grumbled but relented, Roman wasn’t wrong and he was really tired, he stifled a small yawn. He still saw it however and hummed with a smile. Logan really was adorable.

When they reached his room he set him on the bed and tilted his head, Logan tilted his back, mirroring Roman which was so adorable he almost cooed. instead he snapped his fingers. “Ah, I know what’s missing” He snapped again and Logan was dressed in soft pajamas with planets and galaxies adorning them. The small side pet the soft fabric in awe and his eyes lit up at the planets. “Thank you Roro!” he half whispered, still engrossed in his new pj’s. The prince chuckled “of course little astronaut, I’m not done though, you can’t very well go to sleep without a soft cuddle buddy now can you?” and suddenly Logan was holding a star plush, it was almost half his size and impossibly squishy. Needless to say he loved it.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

“No problem little one.” came the chuckled reply as Roman tucked him into bed. “now try and get some sleep”

Roman went to turn out the lights but Logan spoke up softly one last time,

“Roro?”

“Yes my little prince?”

“You be my cuddle buddy too?”

Roman smiled and slid under the covers, snuggling Logan (Platonically or I’ll stomp you with my hooves)

“of course star.”

[mittensmorgul]

In 12.23, Castiel said he saw the future, that Jack would pretty much save the world "And it is a world without fear and without suffering and without hate." We've all wondered if they'd ever bring Jesus into this show. What if Jack is basically Jesus? It's not a perfect fit, but he's the grandson of God, born to a mortal woman, raised by stepdad(s), and God decreed he had to die. So maybe what Cas saw was true, and Jack will eventually come back and save the world. Thoughts?

oh wow, there is actually quite a lot to unpack here...

Needless to say, I am HIGHLY dubious the show wants to have an explicit messiah figure, you know? After everything the characters have been through in the name of Free Will, the notion that some ~other~ character would magically have the power to save them all-- even if it is the mirror character for all three of them-- it seems kinda... I don’t know... disappointing, I guess? At least to me...

The show has ALWAYS been Winchesters against the Supernatural, you know? Plucky lads against fate and the whole order of the universe, in the name of humanity.

Eh, it just rubs everything the wrong way to have a character-- yes, even Jack-- pop in at the 11th hour with some woo-woo and save the day. It’s cheap.

Not to say that wouldn’t happen, but heck... 

The vision of “The Future” that unborn Jack gave Cas in 12.19 may very well have been the happiness at the end of the road, but hoooooboy to assume that’s the only important thing here kinda negates everything we’ve actually watched happen between that point and now. Because the show has explicitly told us how souls are ultimately judged, you know? How human lives are measured-- not by someone sitting in judgment of them, but personally based on their actions and choices throughout their lifetime.

Billie’s books write and rewrite themselves as different choices are made, you know? Even if Unborn Jack actually gave Cas a true vision of the future... Jack-- who, remember was basically Jack’s power acting in self-protection, claiming Cas as his guardian and caretaker, and not, like, intellectually understanding what true human happiness looks like and seeing the actual, real future, because Jack still doesn’t know what those things look like now that he’s been born.

We’ve watched Jack struggle for the last two damn years to understand good and bad, right and wrong, learn to understand what human love and family are. I will NEVER believe that fetus!Jack actually understood any of these concepts enough to project some fundamental truth into Castiel’s mind that would’ve led him to abandon Sam and Dean at the gate to Heaven when Lucifer’s last Prince of Hell had just been murdered on that spot. And then after his birth Jack just... ~forgot~ any of what he’d related to Cas to convince him to become his caretaker. I mean... nope. Nothing about Jack’s ongoing difficulty understanding what it means to be human will ever convince me that he actually knew what the fuck before he was even born. He’s still confused when he gets caught out in a lie, you know? He was baffled as to why his grandmother would be angry with him for deceiving her. That’s not a being that could’ve delivered a true vision of “paradise” to Cas, unless he was picking up on what CAS has always thought was “paradise” and reflecting it back to him... 

(and even CAS doesn’t get-- and definitely didn’t when he was in his depression spiral of feeling useless and needing to get a “win” for Dean back at the end of s12-- even he doesn’t really get what happiness might look like for real... he didn’t even think he really “belonged” in the Winchester family yet! He believed playing their PROTECTOR was all he was to them-- USEFUL. And hoooooboy is that so not the whole truth. A world without fear, without hate and suffering? Sounds peaceful, but it definitely doesn’t sound like freedom, you know? So any reflection of what HE might have wanted most back at that point would necessarily be affected by the fact that he had lost his faith in himself.)

I mean, if Jack had actually been born innately understanding humanity, then maybe... maybe I’d believe it, but that’s never the story we have been told.

And the show itself would seriously need to redefine the ongoing concept of “paradise” that we’ve always been given, which has always boiled down to the absence of free will, like we were shown in 14.15 when Chip manipulated the entire down via mind control into HIS idea of “paradise.” In order for him to achieve that, everyone else had their will erased and replaced with his own.

A world without fear, suffering, and hate is probably a world with a hive mind consciousness, sadly to say. It’s not a place where Free Will can exist. It’s a child’s ideal. Because a world without any of those negative things is also a world without joy, pleasure, and love.

Hi, we live in a duality. It’s not all bad, but it’s not all good, either. How long has it taken for Jack to understand that the world isn’t black and white, but entirely shades of grey? AND HE STILL DOESN’T UNDERSTAND.

“STOP LYING!” As if it was just that easy! If lying is “bad,” and hurts people, then it shouldn’t exist! But truth-- which is supposed to be “good” can hurt people so much more. Even little things where the consequences are non-existent, we often lie to spare others’ feelings, or else just keep the truth to ourselves.

“It’s so good to see you!” when someone is thrilled to see you, but you’re kinda meh about it. Maybe you were hoping to be dressed better and not frazzled after a long day at work. Not a world-shattering lie, but it makes the other person feel good, and that in turn makes US feel good.

“You look really good!” Maybe it’s clear they’re wearing a new, special outfit they seem to love. Maybe they have their hair done up fancy. And you think it’s kinda silly, but they look happy, so what’s the harm in commenting on their happiness?

In those circumstances, the truth would just be pointlessly cruel, you know? And that’s no way to go through life. No one wants to live in a world where brutal honesty is all that’s on offer...

In Jack’s ideal of paradise, the one Cas spoke of in 12.23... that’s what it would look like.

Sometimes the pleasant fib is better...

So if the show itself uses different language than it ever has in the past to redefine what this concept of “paradise” even is, then yeah, I could get behind that. But until then, it’s as naive a dream as Jack’s understanding of the world has been.

And I can 100% guarantee that Jack will be back. He got the extra deluxe Welcome To The Empty Committee waiting to chat with him. My guess (and this is 100% conjecture and not a guarantee here) is that he’ll be reunited with his “burnt up” soul and returned to Earth. My personal guess is that he will truly be helpful to TFW over the course of s15, but I just don’t know if I’m comfortable with the notion of him being a savior to them all. I’m thinking whatever happens by the end, it will truly be a team effort. Or else what else is the purpose of their final Big Bad being the biggest anti-Free-Will force in the universe?

(yes, Chuck created free will and included it in the kit, but he’s been manipulating and interfering with the Winchester’s lives since before they were born, so have they ever really been able to exercise their own free will, really and truly?)

And heck, I’m wondering why they didn’t just call Billie in the first place when they were all worried about the state of Jack’s soul... From 11.23:

BILLIE: Little tip—you want souls, call a reaper.

And hilariously, Sam remembered his reaper babysitters back in 14.10, in Michael’s office, but when Jack’s soul may have been lost it’s wild to me that nobody though to ask Billie about it... especially after Jack was in Heaven, and Heaven was getting invaded by the Empty...

But of course Billie wasn’t about to remind them. I think she was biding her time, waiting for the right moment when Jack could be truly restored. And now we are there. All the narrative spiral bits have finally lined up.

I am super excited for s15, but I don’t think the whole season is gonna be Jack As Jesus saving everyone, you know? He’s still gotta figure out how to save himself, too...

[treeofsalvation-blog]

My Pairings

No fanfic today, but I do want to ramble a bit about my pairings. I have a couple of new ones in potential, but I want to work on them for a little bit longer. These are my established pairings. I’ve talked about them quite a bit in response to prompts, so here I’ll just ramble about how they got together and what kind of relationship they have. Just rambling in general, I guess.

If you have a question, feel free to ask.

--

Thorne (blue haired landsknecht ♂) and Jonah (male red-haired landsknecht ♂)

Thorne was the one who first made his interest know. Jonah is suffering from a curse in his eye that allows him to learn stats of monsters. Thorne didn’t know that when he first laid eyes on him. Only thought he was cute because he was smaller than the average landsknecht. And he’s cute in general.

Even after learning that Jonah is cursed, and that the one who cursed him is still out there somewhere, Thorne maintained his interest. Jonah was cute and interesting now. Thorne is protective of him, however. Not exactly possessive, but he’s the only one who can tease Jonah and make him blush ever-so cutely.

Jonah doesn’t know what to make of Thorne first, especially his blatant honesty toward him. He did find Thorne rather handsome, but figured that a guy like him would lose interest in him quickly and move on. Thorne was rather flighty, after all. But Thorne made his interest and pursuit of him known, and stuck to it regardless of Grandpa Vlad’s displeasure.

In Nexus, they’re officially in a relationship. Thorne is openly affectionate while Jonah is still more reserved. He doesn’t push Thorne away however, just blushes deeply.

Nairn (male black-haired alchemist ♂) and Althea (orange haired medic *male portrait* ♀)

Their relationship doesn’t fully form until they reach Lemuria/Nexus, and Althea is aged 18. Althea has had a crush on him for a couple of years, but always held back out of fear.

They met accidentally when Althea was in the library studying and Nairn just happened across her. Because of her being mute, she didn’t verbally respond to anything he said. Instead of feeling annoyed that she’s giving him the supposed cold shoulder, Nairn was intrigued because while she didn’t speak, she looked somewhat interested in what he was saying.

Nairn held a sense of interest in her because of her shyness and muteness. His interested turned into protectiveness after seeing a few ladies of society corner her and place the blame on her for the actions of her murderous mother. After seeing how distressed Althea was and how she couldn’t exactly talk back, he did instead. His family is of high society too, but he doesn’t care what others think.

After he learns what had happened to Althea (her mother brutally murdering her father and tried to kill her before fleeing) he vowed to help her regain her voice. And in order to do that is to make her feel safe and comfortable.

They have a very sweet relationship. Holding hands and cuddling is as far as they go, really. They’re both content just to be with each other.

Emmett (red haired medic ♂) and Crystalena (blonde protector *male portrait* ♀)

Crytalena is a maid who works for Emmett and is the daughter of the maid that has worked with Emmett’s family for years. In her mind, she’s just the maid and the help. Emmett is completely out of her league, and rightly so. Emmett is considered Lagaard’s wealthiest bachelor and has a lot of marriage-minded woman and mothers looking at him. And he hates the attention. He’s only interested in Crystalena.

In order to help Emmett ward off unwanted advantages, Crystalena agreed to be his pretend girlfriend. But she believes it’s only a ruse to help Emmett. But Emmett is determined to prove to her that she’s the only woman he can ever see marrying.

Because of her upbringing, Crystalena finds it extremely difficult to believe she’s worthy for someone like Emmett. Even though they’ve crashed into bed together a few times. Had sex, basically. That causes a bit of tension between them, but Emmett is stubborn.

In Nexus, they’re engaged. Crystalena has accepted that Emmett’s love for her is the real deal and she loves him in return. She still has maid tendencies where she likes to serve others. But she knows that Emmett is dedicated to her.

Kendrix (brown haired highlander ♂) and Sokyu (black haired ronin ♂)

Sokyu was seriously injured protecting his younger brother after a monster attacked his village. He would have died had it not been for Kendrix, who had been tracking the monster that attacked. He led Sokyu and his brother to safety, giving up the pursuit of the monster. Sokyu didn’t remember her when they reunited in Lagaard, but Kendrix recognised him immediately. And from then on Kendrix decided to be the one to protect Sokyu and help him heal from his injuries.

As Kendrix watched over Sokyu, his protectiveness morphed into that of genuine need to keep him safe. Even though Sokyu didn’t remember him, he did develop a crush on him.

After a sighting of the monster that attacked Sokyu’s village, Kendrix goes in search of it, attempting to keep Sokyu away. Sokyu tracks him down nevertheless and demands answers, actually more disappointed that Kendrix would leave him behind him. He’s surprised when he learns of their past connection.

After that, the two worked together to take on the monster and free them both of their regrets. For a short while they thought that since the monster was no longer connecting them, that they would drift apart. But they didn’t. They grew closer in fact and decided to attempt this relationship thing because they were both free now.

In Nexus, they’re in a steady and affectionate relationship. Kendrix is still protective of Sokyu though.

Kaiser (blue haired dark hunter ♂) and Kaede (blonde alchemist *male portrait* ♀)

Kaiser’s sister was murdered by her own guild and Kaede was the only witness. She was targeted by that murderous guild and took refuge in Lagaard. Kaiser happened to track her down, hoping to use her to get to the murderers. But he realised how scared she truly was and realised that the murderers aren’t someone to mess with.

So Kaiser became Kaede’s secret protector. He knew that the murderer would eventually come for her, so he reasoned with himself that he’s just keeping an eye on her until then. But Kaede was a very sweet young woman. His need for revenge for his sister grew to also keeping Kaede safe.

The murderers eventually return and Kaiser chooses to protect Kaede over his need for revenge. Staying in close quarters together soon turned to comfort and the cliched passion took over. The murderers realise that they are outnumbered in Lagaard, and the guild’s popularity outmatches any shit-stirring they could cook up. So they fled.

In Nexus, Kaede still lives in fear of the murderers returning, but she knows that Kaiser will protect her. Kaiser has vowed to stay by her side, no matter what. So they have a very endearing relationship.

Ritvik (dark skinned war magus ♂) and Elah (red banded hexer ♂)

They’ve been together for as long as they both can remember. Ritvik found Elah soon after he was turned into a Hexer and immediately took him in to care for him. Elah is very ill, suffering from a curse that affects his physically health. Ritvik is attempting to search for a way to cure Elah.

They’re in a very close relationship. Ritvik is very protective, benignly possessive of Elah. They’re both devoted to each other. Some may see it as being too dependant on each other, but they really do love and care for each other. Who wouldn’t go to hell and back for the one they love?

Duardo (older gunner ♂) and Fleuretta ���Fleur” (blonde haired survivalist – classed as sovereign *male portrait* ♀)

Fleuretta is a princess on the run and in hiding. Her sister wanted her place on the throne so sent assassins to kill her. As you do. So Fleuretta went into hiding, taking her loyal guard, Duardo with her. He went willingly, of course.

Duardo considers himself Fleuretta’s bodyguard, and he can’t be anything more. He doesn’t really have “romance” or “relationships” in his vocabulary. Fleuretta, on the other hand, wants Duardo to see her as more than an obligation. She’s a very unconventional princess, so she’s the one pursuing him. Which baffles the hell out of him.

It takes Duardo some time to realise that Fleuretta is actually serious about disavowing her royal family and becoming an explorer, and having him by his side as a romantic partner.

It takes a few close calls for Duardo to realise that he can’t really see his life without Fleuretta in it. And maybe a life as an explorer for the both of them isn’t so bad.

In Nexus, they’re in a fledging relationship. Fleuretta is still very blunt in her adoration of Duardo though.

Tyvon (white haired dark hunter ♂) and Charity ���Charli” (brown haired gunner *male portrait* ♀)

Tyvon is a street rat of Lagaard. Grew up on the streets and did what he could to watch over the other vulnerable street rats. Despite his class, he’s a caretaker. He tries to help other vulnerable people. But the vulnerability he sees in Charity’s eyes really catches his attention. It also helps that she’s kinda cute.

Charity came to Lagaard to hide from her sister after witnessing her brutally murder a couple of street kids, and tried to blame her for it. She was very skittish and tried to keep to herself in order to keep others safe. She couldn’t shake Tyvon, though. Especially when the two of them are found by Vlad in less than ideal conditions, and he took the two into his guild.

Their relationship started with friendship, to developing crushes on each other. After a near encounter with Charity’s sister, which put Charity in hospital, made Tyvon realise that she could be taken from his life forever and he didn’t like that.

Even after the murderous sister had been dealt with, the two continued with the Just Friends charade, even though they’ve admitted that they would like the other to stay in their life a little longer.

In Nexus, they’re beginning a fledging relationship. Taking things slowly because neither had been in a relationship before.

Garek (silver haired fortress ♂) and Skylark (blond haired sniper ♂)

Garek found Skylark alone in the labyrinth as he attempted to train. He didn’t like that because being alone is dangerous, so practically drags Skylark back to town and gets him to join his guild. Nup. If Skylark wants to train on his own, to master the bow he had inherited (and which his sister is willing to kill him for) he to deal with Garek tagging along. No ifs or buts about it.

Starts off as Garek being Skylark’s bodyguard, to helping him train, to simply hanging out. And it kinda develops from there. There’s no “what are we exactly” talk. They just go with the flow.

Jamal (dark skinned imperial red hair ♂) and Oceana (brown haired fortress *male portrait* ♀)

Oceana is boyish in appearance, but the mother-figure of the entire guild. She never knew her mother and was raised by a hard-working single father. She’s a blend of toughness and gentleness. Jamal is a cynical imperial who is looking for information of his “missing” father.

Oceana is drawn to Jamal first by his looks. He’s rather hot, after all. But its his secret pains that gains her full attention. She understands what he’s going through and wants to help.

Their relationship starts out rather platonically. Jamal sees Oceana as a fellow warrior. Someone to have his back in battle. But he slowly begins to see that she’s there for him outside of battle.

Their relationship starts off as physical at first, the two just needing someone to touch and hold. They soon develop a true bond though Jamal isn’t sure what that is because he hadn’t encountered anything like it before. After Oceana nearly dies does he come to the realisation that he wants a future with her.

In Nexus they’re married, and a short while later Oceana finds herself pregnant.

Harlan (blue armoured imperial ♂) and Celeste (blond runemaster *male portrait* ♀)

Celeste is a bit of an airhead. She was raised in a small village out in the Windy Plains to become a Priestess of Nature. In order to do that, she needed to visit the labyrinths. Harlan is a simple low-level soldier for the empire. They don’t really have anything in common.

Even so, Harlan realises how naïve Celeste still is and kinda took it upon himself to ensure she doesn’t wander into danger. So he finds himself tagging along on her little wandering journeys. It’s through these journeys that they bond and develop feelings for one another, though it isn’t until they shared an unexpected kiss do they ask “What are we?”.

They still don’t know. But it’s nice, so they’ll stay together.

Jake (green haired sniper ♂) and Rosetta (brown haired runemaster *male portrait* ♀)

Rosetta is quite the character who doesn’t care for social cues. She makes her intense interest in Jake known from the moment they meet. That confuses Jake in return and since she’s rather deadpanned about it, he can’t take her seriously.

Rosetta may seem like she’s outrageous in her attempts to get with Jake, and Jake is just a hapless victim. But he has the ability to tell her to fuck off, and she knows when she’s pushed too far. She doesn’t see the point in hiding or being reserved. A part of Jake respects that. He still doesn’t know how to handle her, though. He’s not used to anyone being so openly and honesty affectionate toward him.

In Nexus, they’re in a relationship. Rosetta is still openly and outrageously affectionate. And Jake still finds himself overwhelmed at times. But they genuinely care for each other and Rosetta knows when to hold back and when to push forward.

Miguel (blond dancer ♂) and Shanti (alt purple haired dancer *male portrait* ♀)

Shanti had been raised to be ashamed of her body. She’s out of everyone’s league and she’s destined to live life alone because she’s so useless and such. To say that she’s suffering from low self-esteem is an understatement.

Miguel is outspoken in his complete adoration of Shanti. To him, she’s the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen. He’s very encouraging, both gently and outrageous. He knows when Shanti needs a pep talk, or need someone to simply sit quietly with her.

Interest at first sight which turned into a gentle friendship, to a gentle relationship. Shanti still believes that Miguel deserves better than her, but she also doesn’t want to push him away.

In Nexus, they’re officially in a relationship and Shanti is slowly allowing herself to show Miguel affection out in public.

Daniel (brown haired EO4 medic ♂) and Ryland (brown haired EO4 landsknecht ♂)

Daniel is Tharsis’ most eligible bachelor and his mother wants nothing more for him to settle down with a nice girl and start popping out grandkids. Daniel has other ideas, however. He’s interested in his medical training and to advance that, he agrees to start a guild with his friends.

Ryland is emotionally stunted and suffering from the radical abuse he had suffered as a child. He sees himself as a warrior, not a person. A punching bag with no emotions.

For Daniel, it’s interest at first sight when he meets Ryland. As a medic, he decides that it’s his duty to help Ryland to understand his emotions. He wasn’t expecting Ryland to be so adorable, though. Or so attached to him. Ryland himself is startled by how attached he is to Daniel. His sister, Rosetta, was the only person he had allowed himself to become attached to.

Their relationship turns physical rather quickly because Ryland isn’t used to using words. Action speak louder than words, and sleeping with Daniel helps him to realise how much he means to him. And how much he means to Daniel.

They have a rather unconventional relationship, but Ryland is very attached to Daniel and only sees himself doing “those types of things” (aka, sex) with no one else but Daniel. And Daniel is protective of Ryland, and will protect him no matter what.

Brody (younger white haired EO4 medic ♂) and Sonya (younger purple haired landsknecht EO4 *male portrait* ♀)

Sonya has an obvious crush on Brody and tries whatever she can to get even a moment alone with him, or do something romantic like going on picnics or dates. Brody, however, is older than he looks and he refuses to have anything to do with Sonya at first. He doesn’t encourage her crush on him. He figured that it’s a phase and she would move onto someone much more suited.

It’s not until Nexus that Brody begins to realise that Sonya is indeed quite the beautiful young woman. And she’s as determined as ever. He’s still reluctant, however. He’s a bit of an asshole. A known one. Sonya deserves better than that.

So, currently, they’re in the “they obviously care for each other” phase of their relationship.

Neroli (red arcanist ♂) and Lotus (purple arcanist *male portrait* ♀)

They were friends since childhood and Neroli had dragged Lotus around on little adventures. Only her. He wants to see the world, and he wants to see it all with Lotus by his side. Lotus only wants to stay with Neroli and she wants to see him happy.

They have a very, very innocent and pure relationship.

Devlin (black haired nightseeker ♂) and Kali (white haired nightseeker *male portrait* ♀)

They were in the same cult as children, though they had different roles. Kali was selected to become the Priestess of the Moon and he was nothing more than a lowly guard who is meant to pledge his entire life to her. But something went wrong during the ritual and Kali’s hair turned white. Using the chaos to his advantage, Devlin grabs Kali and flees to Tharsis where they’ll be safe from the cult.

Kali doesn’t truly remember her attachment to Devlin, just that she trusts him with her life. Devlin has cared for Kali for years and had wanted to get the both of them out of the cult for years. He’s dedicated to Kali and makes his affection toward her known. And Kali is as dedicated to him. She doesn’t remember everything of their past together, but her heart does. And that’s all that matters.

They have a strong relationship, having only eyes for each other. During the nights of the full moon, their relationship is very sensual and physical.

Theron (earthlain portrait) and Alexis (younger dragoon ♂)

They’ve been friends for years. Theron is the son of a noble family and expected to find a wife. Alexis’ family owns a chocolatier, which he is expected to one day own, thus giving up his “silly” dream of exploring.

Alexis is a martyr, putting everyone first. He has had feelings for Theron for years but refuses to tell him in fear of ruining their friendship. And Theron deserves better, in his opinion. Theron doesn’t initially see Alexis’ crush on him. But when he does, he goes on a crusade to show Alexis that his feelings are returned.

Which is surprisingly not that easy. It takes some time for Alexis to accept the fact that handsome, rich Theron does indeed like him. He likes him a lot.

In Nexus, they’re in an official relationship. Theron is very handsy, one could say.

Zachary "Zac" (piercings Harbinger ♂) and Astara (long haired warlock *male portrait* ♀)

Astara lost her family in a terrible fire some years ago, but she’s lost a great deal of her memories from that night. Zachary is a bounty hunter who may know a little more about that night than he’s willing to reveal.

They started off as guildmates before Zac found out about Astara’s trauma, so he becomes her secret protector. First, that is out of duty. But after spending time with her, he realises that he’ll do anything to keep her safe.

To Astara, Zac was rather intimidating. But she soon learns that he’s quite the nice guy. Very smart, easy to spend time with. Protective, too. She develops a crush on him rather quickly. She doesn’t do anything about it, though as she’s still struggling with the lost of her family and her memories.

In Nexus, they’re not quite in a relationship. They’re both working through personal issues. But it’s obvious that they care for each other deeply. To others, they’re basically off the market. They just haven’t made it official yet.

Xanthe (Warlock ♂) and Chantall (long haired Harbinger *male portrait* ♀)

Chantall comes from a high ranking council family and expected to marry well. She’s interested in exploration however. And in order to get her family off of her back, she makes up an imaginary man and tells her family that they’re dating. Well, fuck me, they want to meet this man!

Desperate, she turns to Xanthe, an unsocial warlock, for her in pretending to be her boyfriend. Amused by her plight and revelling in the possibility of fucking around with a snooty family of high society, he agrees. Much to Chantall’s shock.

A series of cliché moments between them cause them to spend time together. And they realise that the other isn’t so bad. They’re kinda nice. Cute, too.

In Nexus they’ve decided to make their pretend relationship into a real one.

Ramon (squared jaw Necromancer ♂) and Lilybeth (Fencer *male portrait* ♀)

Ramon was meant to marry a daughter of a noble family. But he decided that he would rather throw himself head first into the labyrinth than marry. Lilybeth is the sister of the betrothed and is sent to find him and drag him home. Instead, she finds herself joining him and his guild, becoming a explorer.

Ramon has made his interest in Lilybeth known practically from the beginning. Lilybeth had been her family’s human punching bag, so relationships are foreign to her. She does find herself drawn to unconventional Ramon, who is hell-bent on helping her to lighten up.

In Nexus, Lilybeth has turned her back on her abusive family and is beginning a relationship with Ramon. They’re kinda in the courtship stage, Ramon going out of his way to woo her again.

Valente (eye patch Dragoon *female portrait* ♂) and Mikazuki (cat-eared Masurao *male portrait* ♀)

Valente is the eligible bachelor of Iroys, and he loathes the title. His family is pressuring him to get married. So he gets childhood friend, Mikazuki, to be his pretend fiancée. And in order to teach his haughty family a lesson, she agrees.

Their relationship is outrageously “affectionate” when they first begin their façade. It soon has them both seeing their steady friendship through a more romantic lens. And they soon realise that their “pretend” is becoming more natural.

In Nexus, they’re in an official relationship. Still outrageously affectionate, but sweetly so now. Especially in private.

Kayin (long haired Necromancer ♂) and Selena (celestian *male portrait* ♀)

They started off as partners working on the case of Selena’s murdered mentor. Spending long hours together, usually just the two of them, had them starting a close friendship. That soon turned into a sexual attraction, which they soon began to explore.

They fell into a natural relationship after that. They’re both very spiritual individuals, and quite mature. So they just went with the flow of things to see where it would take them.

Radhi (younger Pugilist ♂) and Jasmina (Rover *male portrait* ♀)

They both have obvious crushes on each other. But they deny them because they’re a couple of idiots who think relationships are silly and not for them. They’re also stubborn.

They do care for each other greatly however. They’re not sure how to express that, though. So often get into verbal fights, especially if they’re worried. They don’t get vicious with each other with their words though. And don’t say outright negative things about the other. When alone they weakly admit how worried they are and how relieved, and such. Like a pair of idiots.

In Nexus they’re still in the denial stage, but are slowly accepting that they have crushes on each other.

Nadiel (young shogun ♂) and Mercy (alt younger medic *male portrait* ♀)

They’ve been through quite a bit; their prince’s assassination, being stranded on Lemuria before Maginia arrived, and Nadiel being hurt. But they managed to survive by working together. Mercy healed Nadiel while Nadiel kept her safe from harm.

They developed feelings for each other while they were on the lam, but they did not fully accept them, and certainly didn’t do anything about it. They were too busy trying not to get killed by assassins. Now that they’re safe with the guild, they had a few conversations about their feelings and though they felt guilty about failing their prince, they knew that their prince wanted them to be happy. And they’re happy when they’re together.

They have a very sweet and supportive relationship. Very gentle and healthy.

Tabris (younger hoplite ♂) and Kaidus “Kai” (younger orange haired gladiator ♂)

Tabris’ family’s name was ruined several years ago after a member claimed to have seen a monster that “should not exist”. Kaidus had his reputation at stake after the party he had been escorting was wiped out by a monster that “should not exist”.

It started off with Tabris wanting Kaidus to help restore his family’s name. But he soon found himself having to protect Kaidus from those who don’t want him to tell anyone what he had witnessed. Kaidus reluctantly turned to him because he felt guilty about not protecting those in his protection and he wants to help Tabris to restore his family’s name, even at the cost of his own.

Tabris’ protectiveness toward Kaidus soon turned into genuine affection. And Kaidus himself had never saw himself in a relationship, but there’s something nice about being protected by Tabris. And being shielded in his arms.

Currently, they’re in the Not Quite a Relationship stage, though it is obvious that they care deeply for each other.

--

Christ, that took longer than I had expected. And there’s likely more of them in the future. Of course I have a lot of purely platonic “couples” but I’ll leave them for a later date.

[the-zodiacs-written-in-the-stars]

Chapter 10: Babara Burkhart

When Babara had been barely a baby, her mother had died to save her life with the power of love-

Babara had never met her father, but never could she have guessed he was a god and that--

In her past life, Babara had been the princess of the moon, before her tragic death---

Okay, okay, okay, so maybe Babara wasn't a Potter or a Jackson or even a Tsukino. She was a Burkhart without tragic backstory, or meaningful parentage, or a Great Prophecy.

Babara Brunhilde Burkhart (thanks for that, mom...) had been born on a chilly November-night in Vienna, born and raised in Austria all of her life. She had two loving parents, neither of them dead or abandoning her or having some deep, dark, life-altering family-secret. They weren't rich but also never had to worry about having food on the table or getting new clothes.

And every summer, she got to spend at her grandparents' farm in the alps. Because her parents thought that Vienna was too much of a big city and that she shouldn't lose touch to nature (her mother having grown up on her grandparents' farm). But that was okay, because her grandparents were great – and she wasn't the only one who got to spend the summer there. Her cousin, Sebastian Weinberg, was also sent there every summer by his mother for the very same reasoning. That only made the summers extra awesome, because Sebastian was only two years older than her and he lived all the way in Berlin in Germany, so the two didn't really get to see each other a lot. But every summer, they got to be together at the farm and have adventures together.

Sebastian was a total nerd and the two cousins didn't have a lot in common aside from that, so it was even better that they got to form this bond. As a single-child, Babara liked to experience what it was like to live with another child like that, so that even when they grew older and their parents didn't 'force' them to go anymore, they still opted to. To see their grandparents and to see each other.

When Sebastian was seventeen, the introverted nerd met his best friend – Melanie Maguire. Online, writing Harry Potter fanfiction. For Babara, who had always been the heart of every social event and had an easy time making friends with anyone she met, the concept was slightly odd, but she was happy for him. Especially when the two got to meet for the first time and Babs came to realize it was more than just some random stranger on the internet Basty liked to text with. That was a real friendship. So real, in fact, that the two made plans to move to the same city, country not further narrowed down. Somehow, Babs didn't really like the idea of Basty leaving for good.

Using the puppy-dog eyes of doom (patent pending), Babs convinced Sebastian to take her with him. That the two should move together. After all, that best friend of Basty's wasn't going to move there alone either, she had a little brother she was very close to and didn't want to part ways with.

That was how, in the year 2011, Babara Burkhart and Sebastian Weinberg moved to Los Angeles together, shortly thereafter followed by Melanie and Michael Maguire.

Nothing about Babs' life qualified her to be some great superhero.

There was no tragic loss in her background – her grandparents were happily alive too. Her family was very normal and not magical or anything. She worked hard to get to where she was now, with some missteps but who didn't have those. Yet somehow, for some reason, she had been chosen to become a superhero, a protector of Earth. Scorpio.

~*~

“Y... You reckless idiot!”, exclaimed Babs angrily, throwing her hands up. “Oh, Bee, you shouldn't go on solo missions. That's dangerous, Bee. You should have called me, Bee.”

Jamie grumbled and winced as he sat down on his bed, holding his ribs. “I deserve that.”

“You deserve much more!”, grunted Babs annoyed. “Take off your shirt.”

“Hah. So you only want to get me naked too”, sighed Jamie dramatically.

Babs gave him the stink-eye, while Scorpio and Leo curled together on the small couch in the corner, grooming each other. With another wince did Jamie start to peel his shirt off. Biting her lips, Babara rubbed her hands together and closed her eyes for a moment to concentrate.

“How are you stitched up?”, asked Babs surprised when she saw the wound.

“Matt and Mike called a doctor friend of theirs”, mumbled Jamie, cheeks heating up a little.

“You are so damn lucky that they took you with them and you didn't get caught by the bad guys”, grumbled Babs with a glare as she rested her hands on the wound, making Jamie wince. “That's what you get for nearly getting yourself killed. Idiot.”

She had been training her healing skills. Working with the water inside the cells to close the wound. It took time and it exhausted her, but the others were going to ask questions if they noticed. Even though Jamie would totally deserve to walk around with that wound until it healed naturally.

“Don't worry me like this”, sighed Babs softly. “I don't know what I'd do if you died, Jay.”

“I'm not going to die”, promised Jamie, resting his forehead against hers. “I swear.”

“Besides, I wouldn't know how to explain it to Jess”, grumbled Babs with a glare.

That made Jamie laugh and wince a little. “Sorry. Yeah. Okay. No dying.”

“Or you could just tell your sister”, offered Babs just to sigh and lift her hands up in defeat. “Okay, okay, okay. I kno—ow you're not going to 'drag her into this'...”

Jamie narrowed his eyes at her in warning. The two were usually so close and agreed on everything. There was just one thing they might never agree on. And that was Jessie. Ever since their mother had died, Jamie had been the sole caretaker of his sister. Ten years. Jamie had only been sixteen himself back then. It figured that he would become overprotective, because that was the role he had always played in their relationship. The overprotective big brother, shielding her. Personally, Babs thought it would be easier to tell Jessie so Jessie knew where they went, so Jessie knew to care for the kids and knew what might happen to Jamie and Babs. But Babara knew she couldn't tell Jamie how to handle his own family. He'd have to make that decision himself.

~*~

“Don't think too hard, you might fry something.”

Babs scowled and turned to glare at Jessie. The brunette raised one eyebrow as she tried to look over Babara's shoulder at the newspaper. There was another article about Sagittarius, Cancer, Aquarius and Taurus. They were doing... good. Better than the first time Babs and Jamie had met them, really. Still, there was something about Aquarius...

“I'm picking the kids off from school later. Want me to get something from the store?”, asked Jessie.

“I... think we're good”, replied Babs and shook her head.

Lifting up the newspaper, Babs took a closer look, squinting at the photo some more. Jessie huffed.

“You want me to leave you and the newspaper alone...?”, asked Jessie.

“Ha, ha, ha”, drawled Babs unimpressed. “No. I... I gotta... uh... I gotta go.”

“Where? What—Babara!”, called Jessie after Babs.

But Babara was already out of the apartment, the newspaper in one hand, grabbing her leather-jacket with her free hand and hurrying through the bar, not minding anyone.

~*~

Reaching her destination, Babara started knocking on the door hard and repeatedly. A glare was etched into her features as the door opened. Moments later and the door opened to an unusually disheveled Tanya. Her normally so meticulously put-up hair was only in a loose pony-tail. She was wearing her favorite turquoise dress. Frowning at her, Tanya tucked her hair behind her ear.

“Babs? What... can I do for you?”, asked Tanya slowly. “It's been a while since you came over.”

Eyebrows drawn together in determination, Babs held the newspaper up and into Tanya's face. “That's you. Aquarius. That's you. Of course it's you.”

“Wh... What are you talking about?”, asked Tanya, the look of a deer in the headlights on her face.

“Don't lie to me, Tatiana Yevgeniyevna Tarasova!”, exclaimed Babara in warning.

It always paid off to learn middle-names – or in this case, father's names – for maximum efficiency of scolding. Tanya immediately looked like a scolded small puppy. Rolling her eyes, Babs pushed past her ex and into the apartment. It really had been a while since she had last been here. Things had been majorly awkward for a couple months after their breakup. Curiously, Babs looked around. It made her smile, because it still all looked exactly the same as she remembered it. After all, Tanya was not a fan of change, even the smallest. It had been very... tiresome for Babs back in the day, when Babs had been living with Tanya for a while. Everything had its very specific place and Tanya always fussed when it was out of place. That was, in retrospect, probably why the two had broken up because Babs considered herself creative-chaotic. They just clashed too often.

“You don't actually-”, started Tanya again, rather weakly.

“Tanya”, grunted Babs in warning, glaring at her. “I know your boobs.”

“...What?”, asked Tanya confused.

Babs rolled her eyes and motioned vaguely in the general direction of Tanya's chest. “Your boobs. I spent months sleeping on those. Among other things. I know them. And the rest of you. Like, that's you, in a very tight dress and sure with your hair open, but still it's you.”

Ducking her head with a troubled expression, Tanya joined Babs on the couch. “Did... Jamie figure it out too then...?”

Babs snorted and shook her head. “Please. That boy walked right past me when I had blue hair last year. You wear your hair open and put on a mask and he is completely lost. I love the boy, but he has absolutely no abilities to recognize people when they change their appearance.”

Tanya laughed softly and nodded. It was true. Jamie really sucked when someone changed a major part of their appearance. So Tanya, who always wore her hair pinned up, with flowing curls? That alone would already throw him off but an actual mask...? There was no way Jamie was going to figure this out, Babs knew that. Which only made things harder for her though...

“You have to promise me not to tell him”, stated Tanya, with a surprising amount of seriousness. “No one should know. You shouldn't either. But you have to promise to keep my secret, to not tell anyone. Not Jamie, not Basty, not Jessie. No one. You promise?”

Babs winced, even though she had known this was coming. “Of course I promise. I'm not one to spill other people's secrets, Tanya. You know that.”

And Tanya smiled at her confidently, knowing this to be true. Because it was. Which was a problem. Because heaven forbid that Babs can have it easy, huh? Just tell Tanya that Jamie was Leo and tell Jamie that Tanya was Aquarius and then they could all work together. It'd be so easy. But she knew she couldn't just tell Jamie's secret identity to anyone, not even someone she knew Jamie trusted. And now that Tanya had made her promise, she couldn't just go to Jamie either. Urgh.

“How? I mean, why? You're not exactly the type to... you know...”, drawled Babs awkwardly.

“It just... happened”, replied Tanya, tucking her hair behind her ear and frowning. “I just... it's a responsibility that I can't just shake off or ignore. That's not who I am, Varya.”

Okay, that was true. Tanya was a hard-working and serious person who never avoided any task, regardless of how hard it was. She wouldn't just duck out of becoming a hero. Still, Babs couldn't quite imagine Tanya battling monsters. Then again, supposedly she had already seen it. Aquarius. She had seen Aquarius and Taurus fight side by side.

“Oh... Your sword-fighting lessons”, drawled Babs with wide-eyes.

Tanya had learned traditional sword-dancing as a child and later on taken to learn sword-fight too, since she had already mastered the blade in her own ways. That did explain the big sword.

“The problem is that we have not much experience. Sure, we've been going out for over a month now. And we have some... vague... idea of what is going on, but I feel like Leo and Scorpio know more than us, but they... they refuse to work with us.”

Tanya frowned in frustration, balling one fist. Eyebrows knitted, Babara reached out to grasp Tanya's hand and try to sooth her a little. Tanya looked up and took a deep breath.

“You just... have to prove yourselves to them”, offered Babara gently. “They're a team and they don't know you. It figures that they can't just... trust strangers blindly? Who's to know who the good guys and the bad guys really are?”

“We!”, exclaimed Tanya annoyed. “We're supposed to know who the good guys are! There are twelve Zodiacs. They are supposed to be the good guys, the protectors!”

Babara knew that. But she wasn't supposed to know that; the general public knew nothing about what was actually going on and what the meaning of anything really was. They were just scared of all the monsters and knew some heroes were protecting them in colorful costumes.

“Oh, really?”, asked Babs in fake surprise. “What do you know? I mean, what is going on?”

It'd be a good chance to get a grasp on what the new guys knew compared to what Babs and Jamie knew. Tanya frowned for a moment before she got up and motioned for Babara to follow her to the bedroom. Even in there, everything was still the same, all the way to the exact position of the light-turquoise flower-vase next to the bed with exactly three white tulips in it. Babs remembered having regularly bought her girlfriend such tulips too, after she noticed that Tanya liked to keep them next to her bed. It always made the blonde smile in a cute, pleased way. Babara paused when she noticed that one thing had changed in this room. Her eyes widened in surprise as she looked at the wall opposite the bed. There had been some weird modern art piece of blues and greens and whites that was horribly obnoxious in Babs' opinion. Now it was gone and replaced by a large white board.

In Tanya's neat, nearly print-like handwriting were things written on it, magnets pinning pictures next to the writing. AQUARIUS, TAURUS, SAGITTARIUS, CANCER. In the upper left corner, in big, bold letters, each with a newspaper clipping with a picture of them beneath it. Not even self-taken photos. Clever. Just in case the wrong people followed her home and found this. There was a rounded square around the four, indicating that they were a team. In the upper middle of the board was written LEO and SCORPIO with a picture from last month's front-page. There were further notes scribbled in the circle around their names and pictures. Team Lionheart, potential allies. Beneath the LEO was also marked down fire-elemental, uses sword, incarnation of former leader. Mh. Interesting, but not surprising that their companions had given them some background information of past incarnations too. And yes, in most cases, Leo had been the leader. Zeus, the king of the 'gods'. Beneath SCORPIO, it said water-elemental, whip-wielder, wild-card. Babara grinned pleased by that. Be it Hermes or Serket or Abonde, Scorpio really had partnered with a wild array of different personalities, unlike say Cancer who had always picked the greatest, strongest warriors – Ares and Tyr and Sobek. Vaguely magic and healing and deliveries. A jack of all trades, as Scorpio had told her, which was why those under her patronage were always known for multiple realms – Hermes, the god of travelers and thieves and tricksters and the deliverer of the gods, Abonde, the goddess of magic, snow and misery, Serket, the goddess of healing and magic. And that suited Babs just right. Being so specialized in only one or two skills seemed rather boring to her. Jamie too, he had more than one specialization. The lightning of Zeus and Thor was as much the heavenly fire as Amun-Ra's sun-fire; still, lightning was a fire-power only Leo could control.

Shaking her head to make herself focus again, Babs turned toward the rest of the board. In the upper right corner it said LIBRA, with a large question-mark beneath; a picture missing. Potential enemy?, misguided? was written beneath it. Good questions that Babara couldn't answer either, sadly enough. When they had first met Libra, Babara had thought they had made an ally. The betrayal, learning that she was not on their side... Shaking her head again, this time more violently, Babs looked to see what else there was beside the ones she knew about too.

Much to her surprise, there was some new information on there. In the lower left corner, beneath GEMINI, was a dark, not good photo of a person in an ally at night. Looked like a screenshot from a surveillance camera. Frowning, Babs knelt down to see. Air-elemental, vigilante, works alone, uses batons, protects. Huh. That... That was actually news to Babara.

“Who's this? I never saw them in the news before?”, asked Babara innocently.

“Gemini. Or at least I think so. He – well, I'm actually not sure on that one, the costume isn't very revealing about body-shape or anything, really – has been working as a vigilante, since around the time Leo and Scorpio first appeared. I went through the local news all the way back to the date the Zodiacs arrived, to see if I can find any more. After all, there should be twelve. The only solid lead I found was a vigilante who has been keeping the streets at night safe. Beating up robbers and rapists, predominantly protecting girls who are out alone late. Usually, there is a symbol left behind with spray-paint, right above the tied-up criminal. Four lines that cross in a square. But I think it's not a square; I think it's a hastily drawn Gemini-sign”, explained Tanya. “Whoever it is, they're good though. Good at fighting and good at dodging people who try to approach...”

Babs hummed and made a mental note to look into this too. Interesting. She and Jamie had been wondering where the rest of the Zodiacs were too. Seemingly, Gemini really was the only one Tanya had a lead on though. VIRGO – earth-elemental, ARIES - fire-elemental, CAPRICORN - earth-elemental, PISCES - water-elemental, they all stood empty. Four Zodiacs still stood unaccounted for. Were they aligned with Libra...? Had they gotten lost at their arrival on Earth? Were they still training to not go out there completely unprepared? Or were they entirely declining the responsibility and danger of becoming heroes...? Who knew.

Babara sat down on Tanya's bed, leaning back onto her hands and looking at the chart. In dead-center, the villains. She grinned fondly at the name Tanya had given them.

“Snake Nest Villains?”, asked Babara amused.

“They're snake-themed”, grumbled Tanya with a faint blush. “Their leader is Serpentarius. Literally the snake-bearer. The second-in-command, from everything I've seen so far, is Serpens, the snake. Then Hydra and Hydrus. Sure, there are plenty of... one-off-minions. Constellations that... admittedly, mainly Scorpio and Leo had beaten. Monsters possessing innocent civilians. But those three – Serpens, Hydra and Hydrus – are the reoccurring ones. They're... bigger.”

“You're adorable”, grinned Babs fondly.

“Oh, shut up”, huffed Tanya embarrassed and crossed her arms over her chest.

But true enough, inside the largest circle, the one for the villains, she had written those four names the biggest, SERPENTARIUS in the center, the other three in a triangle around it. A sheet of paper was pinned there, a printed-out list of all 88 constellations, with those crossed out that Leo and Scorpio had already defeated. She really was diligent and loved details. Maybe Babs should get onto such a wall and list too. It would make the job easier. Then again... she lived with two nosy children and an equally nosy Irish woman. Such a chart would stay hidden for like half a day.

“Promise me you'll call when you're in a tight spot”, stated Babara after a beat.

“Varya, there's nothi-”, started Tanya with a chuckle.

Babara got up, standing to her full height in front of Tanya (and effectively being on eye-level with Tanya's boobs...), head tilted back to stare up at Tanya with her most serious look. It shut Tanya up.

“Promise me you will call if you're in a tight spot”, repeated Babs. “There are things I can't say, but if you need me, I will always be there to help you, Tatiana.”

Tanya nodded, albeit reluctantly. If Tanya took this clue to figure out Babs' secret all on her own, then good. If not, oh well. Babara was going to find a way to solve this mess sooner or later anyway. With a sudden, sunny smile did Babs pull Tanya into a hug.

“Stay safe, blondie”, whispered Babs softly. “Don't you dare get yourself killed.”

“I'll do my best”, promised Tanya with a chuckle, wrapping her arms around Babara. “Thank you.”

~*~

An hour later, Babara was once again knocking hard and obnoxiously against a door. It took considerably much longer for this one to open and the face greeting her was by far not as friendly as Tanya's. Sebastian Weinberg glared, hair messy, no shirt and pants on backward.

“Basty! My favorite cousin!”, exclaimed Babs with a bright smile.

“I'm your only cousin”, grunted Basty annoyed, ruffling his ginger hair. “And I thought I got rid of you when you moved out. What do you want...? I was busy doing... something.”

“Hello, Angel, I guess you're 'something'?”, greeted Babs, waving past Basty.

Angelique Lamour was flushed a bright red, less from embarrassment and more from... exercise, Babs guessed. She was wearing one of Basty's light-green hoodies and nothing else, rubbing the ankles of her long, pale legs against each other. Her fingers were playing with the thick, blonde braid laying over her shoulder, on her lips a smile that was pure amusement.

“Ye—ep. I'm something”, confirmed Angel lightly. “But it's okay. An orgasm gets better with built-up and delay anyway, so come on inside. What's going on?”

“A... Angelique!”, hissed Sebastian, his face dark-red. “You can't just-She's my cousin!”

“You're so cute when you're a prude, mon amour”, laughed Angel delighted. [French trans: my love]

Babara grinned impishly as she just ducked beneath Basty's arm and walked over to sit next to Angel on the couch. She used to live with them. Well, she used to live with Basty, back when they first moved to Los Angeles. And then, five years ago, after Angel and Jamie had broken up a few months prior, Basty finally got the girl. Oh, he had had a crush on Angel ever since he met Jamie's then girlfriend at the St. John's Pub. But he had thought he stood no chance with Angel, especially since Angel and Jamie had been dating. The fates were on their side though and after Angel and Jamie broke up, Angel found her way to Basty – and the two were just perfect together. Babs had never seen Basty with anyone the way he was with Angel. She brought out the best in him. Regardless of how cute she thought they were, they got rather obnoxious to live with after Angel started spending most of her days at their apartment, which was the reason she had ultimately moved out and decided to move in with Jamie and Jessie.

“No—ow, what's up, Babsie?”, asked Angel and threw her long legs over Babs' lap.

“Don't call me that”, groaned Babara and wiggled her nose.

“Aw, you're so cute”, grinned Angel and bopped Babs' nose.

Babs grumbled a little and got more comfortable. “Okay, so... hypothetically speaking... Say you know a secret from a friend and if you were to tell another friend, that would actually be beneficial to both parties. Do you tell the second friend or not...?”

“Mh...”, drawled Angel thoughtfully, twirling a bright-blonde strand around her finger. “If they will both benefit from it, then they would be grateful in the end, so I would tell them...”

Basty scolded, which was his default facial expression anyway. Far too serious. Babs raised an eyebrow, looking at her cousin and waiting for him to express what annoyed him.

“You shouldn't tell your friend's secret”, stated Basty as he started pacing. “Mel is... hiding something from me. And I would be rather mad if someone else were to tell me. Because that'd mean I hadn't yet earned the right to know that secret. Whatever it is, it's Mel's to tell and she will tell me once she's ready. I know that, so I'm not pushing and I wouldn't want for anyone to get involved, Babs. It's a matter of trust, simple as that.”

That gave Babs a pause. In a way, Basty was probably right. Even though she knew Tanya and Jamie could trust each other... in the end, it should be their decision when or if to trust each other about this secret. Groaning, Babs ran her hand over her face.

“Ange—el, this isn't the answer I wanted”, groaned Babs frustrated.

“Basty, mon amour, go get the ice-cream?”, requested Angel with a smile.

“And put on a shirt, cuz! No one wants to see that!”, called Babs out.

“Now, that's just factually wrong”, chided Angel, wagging her finger at him.

Babs chuckled and got more comfortable as she waited for her cousin to bring the ice.

~*~

“This looks like you've been... busy... What is this, Bee?”, asked Jamie carefully.

Babs bit her lips and looked up at him. Scooting over a little, she motioned for Jamie to join her on the floor, which he reluctantly did. Printed articles were spread out in front of her.

“Okay so I did a little bit of digging, because it's really weird that there are only seven out of twelve Zodiacs accounted for, right? And I found this. A vigilante who's mainly been protecting women from rapists at night and people from robberies. They always leave this sign on the wall where they leave the tied-up criminal for the police to find and I think it's the symbol of Gemini.”

Babs pointed at the crime-scene photos from a newspaper article three days ago. Some tied-up thug with the symbol sprayed right above his head. Jamie frowned and pulled it closer to look at the symbol. It just looked like the Roman number two, so it was a bit of a stretch...

“It makes sense, I guess. Became a hero too, but without a team, staying small-scale”, mused Jamie thoughtfully, tilting his head. “So, do you want to... track them?”

“I figured that could be interesting”, shrugged Babs with a grin. “See who they are, what they're up to. We're only two. We're supposed to be twelve, Jamie. We need to find and approach the others.”

“But-”, started Jamie with a serious frown.

“I know, I know, you still don't trust the Unicorn Princess Squad”, huffed Babs.

“Is... Is that really what they're called?”, asked Jamie doubtfully, frowning.

“It's what the newspaper dubbed them after seeing the unicorn and, mistakenly so, Aquarius look all princessy”, chuckled Babara amused. “They figure she's the leader and so far, Sagittarius is the only companion the newspaper caught on camera. I think it's cute and I'm glad we picked our own name before the news could. That'd have been a disaster...”

“Oh yeah”, grunted Jamie before he shook his head. “But no. I don't trust them yet.”

“They've done heroics all on their own”, argued Babs. “They took down Musca all on their own last week. If they are aligned with the bad guys, this would be the most fucking elaborate scheme to gain our trusts ever! You have to see that, James.”

Jamie frowned at that. It was rare for Babs to call him 'James'. Babara crossed her arms seriously and glared at Jamie, awaiting his answer. Running his hands through his hair, Jamie leaned back against the bed and sighed. He looked up at the ceiling with an even deeper frown.

“I'm still not convinced, Babs. I just...”, drawled Jamie.

“Jay, we're supposed to be a team of twelve. We are supposed to trust ten other heroes. If you keep standing in the way of that and keep rejecting anyone who offers to help us... then we will fail. Fail this city and planet and the whole purpose of why we got these powers”, argued Babs urgently, taking Jamie's hand. “Yes, this version of Libra betrayed us. Yes, she nearly killed you. Yes, you not breathing and nearly bleeding out in my arms will haunt me to my dying day. But that only means we really do need allies, so I will never have to stand there alone. So we have back-up. So we can liberate Libra from this human and find a worthy human host.”

There was doubt and caution in Jamie's eyes as he regarded Babs and mulled her words over. She knew he'd need some longer, but she also knew that she was right.

Read here on AO3!

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[ganymedesclock]

Taking it out of shipping context, what do you think Keiths line about saving Shiro "as many times as it takes" foreshadows?

I mean, I don’t read it as particularly shippy as it is.

I understand people sometimes vehemently deny canonical romantic relationships that are socially looked down on (see “gal pals”) and that’s something to be careful about- but I also think sometimes people are way overenthusiastic to cry ship over any kind of intimacy, and that’s somewhat of a sore topic to me as an aro/ace person with absolutely zero interest in connecting with people that way- because it feels like the insinuation is I’ll never have a meaningful deep relationship with someone because any evidence of a meaningful relationship means they’re dating.

That may not even be the agenda people are pushing as much as people are being enthusiastic about their ship and joking around but it can be how it feels.

As far as Keith’s relationship with Shiro, I have never seen it romantically. I think that they have an incredibly close sibling-like bond with Shiro very much as a sort of older brother peer mentor figure. I think that there’s a lot of himself Shiro can see in Keith- Shiro has a lot of frustration and perfectionist nerve that could very well have made him stormy in a similar way when he was younger.

But on another level, Shiro is a kind of caretaker personality. He very naturally wants to take others under his wing. And Keith is someone who, especially in the past, has needed some love and propping up. Keith is someone who’s spent a lot of his life alone.

I think there’s a similarity between Shiro and Keith’s memories of his father, in the way that both of them haunt him. I don’t think Keith sees Shiro as a surrogate father- that’s not quite their relationship- but I think that when Keith still lived with his dad, they were close. What we see of Keith’s dad, ruling out what’s clearly the hologram trying to manipulate the situation, suggests that he was a very nurturing person who worried a lot for Keith’s sake- even maybe at his own expense.

To Shiro, he would have been naturally drawn to Keith just by seeing him struggle, by seeing that he may not have really had anybody in his corner. Because Shiro’s perspective on it seems a lot like he has a lot of faith in Keith, sees him as very talented and capable- but someone who needs support to shine the way he’s really capable of. We can see this sincerely, and we can also see this get a little twisted the various times Shiro tries to prop Keith up as leader at his own expense- Shiro’s faith in Keith is manipulated a bit by his own lack of faith in himself and that leads him to assume, wrongfully, that Keith, and the team, will just be fine without him.

From Keith’s perspective, however, it’s worth noting Keith is tenacious, and while he can sometimes be more cautious about things, it stands that Keith has the same kind of heroic spirit as the rest of the team.

So I think, simply enough- Shiro, to a certain degree, has some thinking he needs to sort through where he sees himself as a bit of a lost cause, but, even if Shiro doesn’t think he’s going to make it- Keith cares a lot about Shiro. Again, I’ve never seen them romantically, but, I think they really do mean the world to each other in a strictly platonic sense. And I think part of that is, for Keith, Shiro is a cause worth fighting for whether or not he believes it himself in a way that kind of mirrors the way Shiro related to Keith at first.

I think what it comes down to is that Keith and Shiro are growing to a point where they’re more equals than protectorate and mentor and part of what we’re seeing here is that Keith, repeatedly, is reaching out for and trying to protect Shiro, the way Shiro once did for him.

We can even see them repeating the same resting hand on the shoulder gesture to each other- Keith in s1e1 does it to Shiro and Shiro in s3e5 does it to Keith.

[naruto-oc-critiques]

Michiyō Madoka

Here’s your OC review, @michiyomadoka  Sorry for the long wait! I’ll be putting it under a Read More since it was/is so long.

Name: Michiyō Madoka - “Michiyō” means “sunny path” (道陽) and “Madoka” means “circle” (円). Note: The sun is used as a plot device as she associated it with Pain after he stopped the rain in Amegakure and only after his death was able to let go of her hatred of the sun. While the rain in her story is used as a symbol of the “genjutsu world”, the sun is used as a symbol of the “real world”, which she has to make peace with in the end.

C: My Japanese isn’t the best, but I think Madoka is 円か. There’s probably another blog on tumblr that could help you with the translation if you’re interested in knowing the kanji, but I imagine that in most cases you’ll stick to saying Madoka in romaji and not using the kanji so it’s not massively important. There’s also Japandict which I find rather helpful.

Syn - Pain didn’t stop the rain though? It’s near constant downpour there throughout his reign. The only times he stopped it were on Sundays and when he left the village. It was/is used as a sensory jutsu to check for infiltrators.

Gender: Female

Age: Part I: 13-14 and Part II: 17-18

Time set in: Naruto and Naruto Shippūden

Birthplace: Harawa Village, Land of Rain

Lives in: Amegakure

Appearance:

Michiyō is 174 cm tall and weighs 64 kg in Shippūden. She has pale skin, grey eyes and waist-length blonde hair with blunt bangs.

Syn- Weight according to height and gender are good! The hair could be an issue though; such long hair could be problematic; especially if she has it while she’s still young and new. It takes a degree of skill to fight with long hair, especially with close up styles. Even then it’s not very recommended.

C: Details on her actual build would be helpful too. Is her hair usually loose or tied up? As Syn mentioned, long loose hair can get ninjas into all sorts of trouble.

In Part I Michiyō wears a black skirt that reach her mid thighs with slits on both sides and the kanji for dream (夢, yume) in yellow and a sleeveless black crop top with a zipper in front. Underneath she wears a sleeveless mesh suit with black lining, covering her from the neck down to the thighs. She also wears grey shorts and short grey fingerless gloves in rubber with black-lined mesh underneath and has her grey Amegakure forehead protector tied around her hips, as well as a grey shuriken holster on her right thigh. She wears a pair of regular black shinobi sandals with knee-high black-lined mesh stockings and has black nail polish on her fingernails and toenails. She also carries a grey and yellow tantō strapped on her back.

Syn - Yellow seems a bit out of place in a darker village like Ame. Most colors you see there apart from Yahiko and Konan’s hair are dark and dull. Also, why with the rubber?

C: The reason behind the kanji for Yume would be nice to know.

In Part II she wears a pale grey sleeveless, knee-length dress with slits on both sides and the kanji for dream (夢, yume) in yellow, with a narrow low-cut V-neck almost reaching her navel. Underneath she wears a sleeveless mesh suit with yellow lining, which covers her from the neck to down the thighs. She wears still grey shorts but has replaced her short gloves with long grey fingerless gloves in rubber with metal plating on the backhand and yellow-lined mesh underneath as well as a pair of matching, knee-high grey rubber boots with the same yellow lined mesh stockings underneath. She wears a grey belt around her waist with her Amegakure forehead protector plate on and a grey shuriken holster on her right thigh and now has yellow nail polish on her fingernails and toenails. She also carries her sword strapped on her back, which is concealed inside a grey and yellow oil-paper umbrella. As a member of Amegakure’s Anbu unit Namida, Michiyō wears a grey, hooded, ankle-length rain cloak with a zipper in front over her usual outfit and a metal mask designed with slanted eye-holes with four dots trailing down from each corner, the kanji for “tears” (涙, namida) on the forehead and four vertical lines in place of the mouth, resembling the Amegakure village symbol. Her mask uniquely has yellow markings around the eyes and trailing down the cheeks. During the Fourth Shinobi World War, Michiyō wore a standard Amegakure slate grey flak jacket with swirls on the chest, on top of her normal outfit.

Syn - Why the kanji? What kind of swirls on the flak jacket? Why did she have a special flak jacket? I do like the idea of different ANBU divisions though.

C: Is the rain cloak and mask the standard ANBU uniform for her division? How come they don’t have a full standard outfit/style like other ANBU?

Michiyō is also noted for always wearing a simple silver necklace with a small teardrop-shaped pendant around her neck - a gift from Hanzō that is actually a concealed vial containing the only known antidote to his poison, which she usually wears tucked away underneath her shirt for protection.    

C: You’ve not mentioned what this vial is made of, but I’d advise making it metal or similar rather than glass so that it’s not easily breakable.

Family:

Rin Madoka (mother, deceased): Her only living family, the relationship was very poor as her mother drank and neglected, as well as verbally and emotionally abusing her. When she died Michiyō did not mourn her and only felt relief when thinking about her death.

Unknown father (father, presumed deceased): The relationship is non-existent as he left her when she was a baby. When confronted she blames him for not taking care of her, but never really thinks about him otherwise.

C: It’d be handy for us to know who he is, even if Michiyo doesn’t.

Occupation: Anbu captain

Rank: Part I: Genin and Part II: Anbu

Team:

Team 4: Michiyō Madoka, Natsuko Long, Kai Jakushi and Sensei Kinichirō Togawa. Michiyō’s assigned genin team. I was thinking about this team having a dynamic similar to Team 7: Michiyō/Naruto was in love with Kai/Sakura and Kai/Sakura was in love with Natsuko/Sasuke, while despite their differences Michiyō/Naruto and Natsuko/Sasuke were best friends.

Syn - It’s important to think of team dynamics, but this seems like too much of a Team 7 parallel to me.

C: I would also avoid spelling out where your inspiration comes from in general, as then the parallels become particularly obvious. If your OCs would genuinely have that kind of dynamic then that’s fair enough, but I still feel like there should be some differences between your team and team 7’s.

Team Akuma: Tsuyu Saitō, Kohaku Itō and Captain Michiyō Madoka (codename Akuma). Anbu team within the Anbu unit Namida, specialized in ambush/protection and serves as bodyguards for the village head.

Syn - Somehow I kind of doubt Pain would want/need an ANBU protection squad? None the less one ran by Hanzo’s “daughter”. The general Ambush/Protection classification is generally fine though!

C: I’m not convinced on the team name either. Team Michiyo would be better, or an entirely different codename for the team as a whole.

Syn - Like going by Alpha, Beta, ect. Something like that.

Friends:

Hanzō (caretaker/father figure): After Hanzō took her in and made her his student Michiyō came to love him as a father figure and was devastated when he was killed by Pain. His death had a profound impact on Michiyō and afterwards she gave up on the idea of peace and bonding with others and bended down to Pain in order to survive, trying to let go of Hanzō. When she later met the reanimated Hanzō she admitted that she had not been able to let him go and despite all the bad things he had done she still loved him.

Syn - I just...don’t think of Hanzō as the type to take someone in. I could see him hearing about an oddly talented civilian and conscripting them to the academy though.

C: Shouldn’t Pain have killed her if they were close? From the wiki “the Six Paths of Pain confronted and single-handedly killed Hanzō, systematically slaughtered every person he was ever in league, or affiliated with; from family and servants, to even ambassadors of the villages who he was associated with”.

Natsuko Long (best friend/teammate): Was her best friend, but they grew apart in the Academy when Natsuko became popular and Michiyō as the outsider began isolating herself becoming solely focused on getting stronger. When Natsuko died, Michiyō did not go to her funeral as she at that point had suppressed her emotions completely, something she later regretted and after the war was finally able to mourn her.

Syn - How can they be best friends if they grew apart in the academy and never reconciled?

C: It’s nice to see her regretting her past actions, though I realise that may sound awful.

Kai Jakushi (friend/childhood crush/teammate): Due to Michiyō being an outsider and he was popular, Michiyō was forced to pretend that they were not friends in the Academy, while hiding her crush on him. While team mates her feelings for him disappeared as she suppressed her emotions and they grew apart when team disbanded and after Natsuko’s death they never spoke again.

Syn - So, she and Kai stayed friends but not her and Natsuko? Why?

Kinichirō Togawa (sensei): She liked and admired him, and felt sad when he drank himself to death not long after his retirement when Team 4 disbanded, but tried to let it go and not think about it.

Syn - Why did he become an alcoholic? Because Natsuko died?

C: It would be nice to have a bit more detail here, like why she admired him, and more details on her feelings rather than just “sad” when he passed away.

Kakashi Hatake (friend/romantic interest): When they met in Part II after Pain’s defeat, she came to respect and admire him during the preparation for the war and slowly developed feelings for him. However she hid them as she still feared they made her weak and vulnerable. Note: I’m not sure whether to just leave it at a crush/friends or to have them become a couple in the end after she breaks out of her emotionless shell - I don’t plan on them getting married or having children or anything like that, I thought of them more as lovers/partners and I am still not entirely sure whether she would move to Konoha for him – any advice on if the relationship even seems plausible would be fine :)  

Syn - honestly i think konoha shinobi would be wary of most ame shinobi. Also, i don’t believe Ame participated in the fourth war, as they’d just lost their leaders. They would have been too embroiled in finding a leader, likely through civil war given the country’s history.

C: It was just the main 5 villages and the samurai who participated in the war. We could really do with more detail on how they actually meet, and how any kind of relationship has time to develop.

Personality: As a child she was happy, cheerful and stubborn with a fierce temper much like Naruto Uzumaki, but due to the lack of love in her childhood she became introverted, reserved and taught herself to supress her emotions and put up a façade.

C: Becoming introverted and reserved makes sense if she had a difficult childhood. Does she still have the same temper “under the surface” then? I’m curious as to whether or not she has any “ticks” that give may away her hidden emotions to anyone who knows her well enough.

After Hanzō’s death, she lost all hope in other people and believed that bonding with others would only make her weak. Though she hated Pain, she never sought revenge, as she was too afraid of him and believed that he could never be defeated.

C: It’s good to see that she understands the limits of her power, though I’m curious as to why she lost hope in other people at this time too. Logically speaking, if she could gather up a reasonably large band of at least semi skilled people, then she could have had a chance at beating Pain. If she was that attached to Hanzo I feel like she would have tried to do something, though obviously not if it was a lost cause.

Trapped under Pain, unable to deal with all her anger, hatred and sorrow she instead chose to completely shut off her emotions and slowly turned her own heart into ice. Michiyō came to believe that the only way she could survive and become strong was to let it all go and forget about the past and everything that had happened and she willingly bended down to Pain in order to survive. The past became a taboo which she never thought or spoke about and her only focus was to keep moving forward at all cost. She became obsessed with getting stronger and all her waking hours she trained her genjutsu, which with time became the only way she could express her emotions. Most of the time Michiyō is calm and composed, with an aloof and confident attitude. However she is also talkative, strong-opinionated, and can also be funny and charismatic at times, but her cheerful exterior is often only a part of her facade and she always keeps people at an arms-length, never showing her true emotions.

C: To be honest, being charismatic at times gives off something of a manipulative vibe to me, though I’m not sure if you were aiming for this.

Syn - I could see the manipulative side developing after all that she’s been through though.

She is extremely enduring and also adaptable under extreme circumstances, unflappable and very good at keeping her cool in any situation. She is very determined and ambitious, but can turn obsessive under too much pressure. Due to her upbringing she is also quite mature for her age and very independent as she is used to relying only on herself and can therefore also be very selfish, always putting herself before others.

C: Selfishness is a good flaw, and makes sense for her too.

Syn - Makes sense with the manipulative vibe too!

As she prefers her own company most of the time, she has very few friends and when not on duty she spends her time alone in her apartment painting or reading as she likes being creative, which helps her develop ideas for her genjutsu. The thing she fears above anything else is being vulnerable and weak, opening up and then being betrayed or exploited, which is why she trusts no one and keeps to herself. Her fear is her weakest point, as she has never learned to be brave and has had to flee and hide her entire life to survive.

C: I like these fears.

Syn - Sounds very much like someone who grew up so close to the center of a war-torn country.

However, after Pain’s death everything changed for her and her meeting with Naruto and watching his refusal to give up made her realize that she had been wrong to despair and give up on other people and she regained her hope in a better future. This helped her break out of her emotionless shell and shed her façade, no longer believing bonds and feelings is just weaknesses and she began creating new bonds and also finding the courage and will to fight for her village and others than herself.

C: It’s good to see her grow and move on from her old feelings. Naruto has changed so many characters in canon though, so it can feel a bit stale when he’s the reason for an OCs change too. I would consider linking it to the actions of her friends, fellow villagers or something, so it feels a bit fresher (I hope you get what I mean here).

Abilities: Despite her being born into a civilian family, Michiyō was born with immense genjutsu powers. Learning the basic theory behind chakra by years of listening in on the shinobi teams passing through her village, she was able to teach herself how to mould chakra and create genjutsu and even before she joined the Academy she had surprisingly good control of her abilities. She was even able to catch a fully-fledged shinobi in a Genjutsu Binding when she was 8 years old, which were enough to catch the eye of the legendary shinobi Hanzō, who took her as his student.

Syn - That’s a little over-powered, for some civilian kid with not family history of shinobi. I could see maybe a Kurama kid being able to do this.

C: This is definitely beyond the realm of what an untrained child could be reasonably expected to learn without some kind of formal tuition. If you want Hanzo to take an interest in her, why not wait until they start to teach genjutsu at the academy?

As she has trained herself to suppress her emotions her entire life, with time her genjutsu became the only way she could express her emotions and therefore became very dependent on them. Her powers are so strong that overuse eventually breaks down her mind and personally, so that she at last is just an empty shell.

Syn - I can see the becoming dependent of genjutsu thing, as that seems like a viable side effect from emotional suppression. But by that last sentence do you mean she ends up killing herself with her genjutsu? Or at least puts herself into a vegetative state?

C: I’m guessing that you’re aiming for a ROOT style personality, though I feel like if she loses too much then she won’t care about missions, or even self care and could just fade away, or die due to carelessness on a mission.

Note: I am still working on the mechanics of her genjutsu powers as I don’t want it to be just a copy of the Kurama Clan’s genjutsu, but I still want it to be something that defines and shapes her throughout the story, so any suggestions is very much appreciated :)

Syn - I just don’t see how the genjutsu could be developed into something that isn’t too close to the Kurama clan’s. Strong genjutsu like that just screams Kurama. C, you got any ideas?

C: To be honest, I feel like your best route might be to just have her being distantly related to the Kurama clan (maybe by a grandparent or mystery dad). Ame is basically a mixing pot of the surrounding countries, so it wouldn’t be a stretch for someone from Konoha to wind up there. I just think that at the moment, what you’re aiming for is too similar to the Kurama clans KG to try and make it something different, and there’s nothing in canon stopping you from borrowing it.

Syn -  Yes. Mystery Dad. But, yeah, Rain is basically the New York of Naruto. Lots of refugees from other nations.

As she has chosen to focus almost solely on her genjutsu, her other skills have naturally suffered and she is quite average in other general shinobi skills. She is amongst other things unable to use any elemental chakra natures only Yin Release and because she was born a civilian she naturally has a very small amount of chakra which gives her a low stamina.

C: Her maximum amount of chakra can be increased with training (to an extent), so I wouldn’t make it too low as I think it’s something that she would spend time developing. She should also have a natural element which would be nice to know regardless or whether or not she can really use it.

As she has been naturally focused on her mind and on studying, she is particularly weak in terms of physical strength and endurance and taijustu. As she is usually extremely well-protected by her genjutsu powers this does not normally pose a problem, but in a taijutsu match she could easily be beaten by someone like Ino Yamanaka and if ever punched directly by Sakura Haruno or Tsunade she would properly be killed. However, to make up for this she has worked on her speed and evasion and she is very quick. Michiyō is also extremely skilled in kenjutsu, wielding the ninjatō Tīdaami meaning “sunshower” (太陽雨), which she can use to induce her genjutsu when infusing it with her yin chakra-flow.

Syn - So her lack of elemental jutsu is due to her focus on genjutsu? I can see that, but I think at least one or two low level ninjutsu would be a good idea. Besides, if genjutsu was literally the only skill she’s good at I could hardly see her making it past being low-leveled chuunin. Though, I really do like the idea of the tanto/genjutsu combination. But if she’s good with kenjutsu then I think she should be at least decent with taijutsu as well.

Also, on the chakra front, she won’t be able to use a lot of strong genjutsu without a decent bit of chakra, or one of those that consumes it over time. So Id’s do what C recommended and have her train it up some.

Due to her training with Hanzō, she also has great knowledge in creating poisons and antidotes and she can use her umbrella both to release a hallucinogenic Poison Mist that she uses in her genjutsu, while she is also able to use a unique summon – an earthworm, which she is able to ride on top of, is poisonous like Ibuse and can also consume physical energy. Due to her training in the Anbu she is also a very capable assassin.  

Syn - Earthworms are also different, which is nice, but they’re not really poisonous creatures. Caterpillars might be a better choice on that front.

C: You could also go for a parasitic worm of some kind. I don’t know much about worms, so you’ll have to do the research on it though.

Stats: Part I: 14 Part II: 24

Ninjutsu: Part I: 1 Part II: 3

Taijutsu: Part I: 0.5 Part II: 1

Genjutsu: Part I: 4 Part II 5

Intelligence: Part I: 2 Part II: 4

Strength: Part I: 0.5 Part: 1

Speed: Part I: 2 Part II: 4

Stamina: Part I: 1 Part II: 2

Hand seals: Part I: 2 Part II: 4

Syn - Hey, don’t these stats actually make her weaker than Sakura overall? I don’t see how she could be ANBU with these? Kurenai is a Jounin specializing in genjutsu and her overall stats are almost 30 in total.

C: Naruto had total stats of 14.5 at the age of 12, and was rock bottom of his class. He also doesn’t have any skills below a 1, and his genjutsu goes up to 2 by part II despite him being hopeless at it. I’d shift her stats up to at least 18 or so, with none lower than 1 in part I. I’m not sure if you want Michiyo to be on Kurenai’s level, but if that’s the kind of skill you’re aiming for in part II, then you need to be around the 29 mark. If not, 24 is pretty reasonable for an average shinobi of that age, and is on par with Shikamaru in shippuden.

History:

Background: She grew up in the small village Harawa born to civilian parents, her father left her when she was a baby and her mother began drinking after that. She had no friends and was bullied, until she used her genjutsu to scare the other children away, resulting in them leaving her alone and giving her the nickname Akuma meaning “demon/devil”.

Syn - Why was she bullied in the first place? And this is where you got her squad name, yeah? I don’t think someone would use a childhood insult as their team name unless they were sadistic with a good dosage of self-loathing.

C: I’ve personally seen this nickname too many times, and would advise picking something else, if you even need the nickname at all.

When she was 8 years old, a battle between Hanzō’s forces and the Akatsuki burned down her village, killing her mother. After Hanzō watched the young Michiyō stop one of his shinobi who mistook her for the enemy in a Genjutsu Binding, he decided to make her his student and use her in the civil war. When she was 10 years old Hanzō was killed by Pain, however Michiyō was lucky to escape through a secret pathway through the sewers. After that she lived on the streets – I am thinking of placing her in an orphanage instead where she perhaps is recruited into Namida, but I’m not sure whether Amegakure even had orphanages at this point?

Syn - Once again, I think Hanzo pulling her to to academy would make more sense, rather than making her his student. This would also rectify the “Akatsuki killing everyone Hanzo is connected to” problem as well. She could still admire him for giving her a new chance at life or a new purpose maybe?

C: If Hanzo wanted to use her as a weapon some kind of ROOT equivalent would make the most sense if he wanted her trained quickly, though you’d need to bump her skills up. It’d also mean quite a bit of rewriting. With Nagato and co’s experience of Ame, I’m not convinced that there would be any orphanages. Also, with Pains sensing abilities, I really doubt that a 10 year old would be able to escape him. If you want her to live she can’t be that close to him.

One day she met another girl her age named Natsuko and they became best friends. Together they started in the Academy, but Michiyō was an outsider and was bullied due to her ragged looks from living on the streets and kept to herself. While she was extremely skilled in genjutsu, she lacked any other shinobi skills and it took her three tries to graduate, but she managed to graduate as the top kunoichi on her third try. She was put into Team 4 with Natsuko and their mutual friend Kai under the jōnin sensei Kinichirō.     

Syn -  Most Academy classes start when the kids are six, not ten. That would be far, far too late for them to develop skills in time to graduate at 11 or 12. Also, with her lacking in so many of the other skills I don’t see how she could have possibly been kunoichi of the year.

C: With the state of Ame, I feel like there would be a couple of street kids in every class, so it wouldn’t be that much of a reason to bully someone. Taking three attempts to graduate and then being the best kunoichi don’t fit together either, unless something happened to really aid her development in that time period.

Part I: Team 4 participated in the Chūnin Exams in Konoha. They passed the written exams due to Michiyō using her genjutsu on the other students while collecting the answers. During the Forest of Death challenge they came across Team 7 and a battle between Kai and Sasuke ensued, ending with Kai being seriously injured. On the last day Team 4 was able to secure the earth scroll and passed, however in the preliminaries Kai’s injuries were so serious that he was forced to withdraw by their sensei. Michiyō and Natsuko then met each other in battle, with Michiyō winning due to playing on Natsuko’s fears with her genjutsu, causing her rift between them. During the finals, Michiyō was assigned to fight Dosu Kinuta, however as Dosu was killed by Gaara they never got to fight. After Chūnin finals were stopped due to the invasion of Konoha, Shikamaru was the only one who was promoted chūnin and Michiyō and Team 4 travelled home to Amegakure.  

Syn - Being in the same chuunin exams is fine, but the battling your own teammate thing is kind of cliche. Why not go further and mix up canon by shifting fights around? Also, why did the other members of the teams not fight? Why just Sasuke and Kai? And wasn’t there already a rift between Michiyō and Natsuko? I thought that you said their relationship pretty much started and ended in the academy.

C: Dosu was meant to fight Shikamaru in the finals as far as I’m aware. I’d personally be inclined to use more OC teams for Michiyo and co to fight against rather than fiddling around with the canon fights, but as long as you leave the ones with the most plot in canon intact you can fiddle with them as Syn said.

Part II: Despite failing to make chūnin, the superiors in Amegakure had taken notice of her exceptional genjutsu skills and she was recruited into the Anbu sub-division Namida (seen as Amegakure’s equivalent of Root) which takes in orphan children and trains them as weapons to protect the village. Michiyō underwent 3 years of gruelling training, becoming a skilled and ruthless assassin and at some point passing the chūnin exams at age 14. At age 16 Michiyō was promoted to Anbu captain and was assigned to lead her own three-man team, which specialized in ambush/protection, serving as bodyguards to the village head.

Syn - Wait, wait. They (Konoha’s Rookie 9) were 12-13 in part one. Probably around 13 by the time they took the chuunin exams, which means Michiyō would be late 13s, early 14s at the time of the chuunin exams. So she’d be 16/17 by the time she finished those three years of Anbu training. Though becoming an Anbu Captain at sixteen is some sort of Kakashi level thing; I probably wouldn’t advise it. Not with her point allocation. And probably late into her 14th year or early in her 15th for becoming chuunin if she didn’t pass the Konoha exams.

But if the initial thought was to train her as a weapon, why wasn’t she dumped in this division from the beginning?

C: I really do think that she should have been put in this sub division when Hanzo found her originally, as waiting ages to create a weapon for a current war through the academy doesn’t make sense.

After Pain’s death during his invasion of Konoha, Michiyō was shell-shocked that he could ever be defeated and wishing to meet Naruto who had defeated him, she volunteered her team for the mission Protect Naruto, which Konan had started as a way to ensure that Pain’s faith in Naruto would not be wasted as well as an attempt to reach out to Konoha to make an alliance – which however failed as the new Hokage Danzō was distrustful of Ame’s alliance with Naruto. In Konoha Naruto told Michiyō Pain’s story and also what Hanzō had done to him, while she was shocked she shook it off and declared that she had let him go many years ago and that her hatred for Pain was no longer necessary as he was dead.

Syn - There was never any sort of official “Protect Naruto” mission, and I very highly doubt Tsunade would let them anywhere near Naruto for an extended period like that. Plus, I don’t think Konan lived long enough to give any sort of official declaration or mission regarding Naruto. There’s also the fact that Ame was left without any leader at this point in time, so no one would be sent out on mission for a while I would think.

C: Ame also tends to get run over by the larger nations on a regular basis so don’t really have ninja to spare, especially when they don’t have a village leader.

Following Naruto with her team to the Land of Iron and later watching the battle between Team 7, Michiyō was reminded of the old Team 4. At last watching Naruto’s resolve to never give up, also seeing her early self in him, made her realize how different she could have become if she had not given up, Michiyō decided to change her ways and began to believe in peace for the first time since Hanzō’s death.

C: As a mentioned earlier, lots of characters have changed because of Naruto in canon. I also feel that changing simply because of watching him is a little weak, for lack of a better word. I could understand it better if it was something that she had been considering for a while, but this was the last straw, though that’s not the impression that I get.

Syn - If anything, watching him might bright to light a seed of doubt, but beyond that it would take something more significant and impactful.

Deciding, like Konan, to put her faith in Naruto, she became determined to make a difference and persuaded her team to travel back and try to rally Amegakure to fight with Konoha in the upcoming war against the Akatsuki. However, when they arrived Konan had been killed and the village was scrambling to mobilize their defences. But due to Michiyō’s words and refusal to take no for an answer, feeling that her village is responsible for the Akatsuki, she eventually succeeded in convincing her superiors and they decided to dispatch the Namida forces of the Anbu to join the Allied Shinobi Forces, keeping the rest of the shinobi in to defend the village.

C: How big are the Namida forces anyway? As horrible as it sounds, I’m not sure that they’d be a big enough power to really sway the outcome of the war, while on the other hand they’d be a big enough power to make a difference to any issues at home. It doesn’t make sense to me from a logical perspective for them to be sent off, and not stay around Ame keeping the peace and protecting her superiors.

Syn - Konan would have been killed long before this, unless this is an AU. And it’s really doubtful “superiors” or “elders” would heed to the pleas of one girl; they’d probably be too busy fighting amongst themselves for the position of leader.

The Ame forces arrived in Kumogakure at the nick of time and though initially met with hostility, with the support of Naruto, Kakashi and the newly awoken Tsunade they were permitted to join the Surprise Attack Division. When they were attacked by the Surprise Attack and Diversion Platoon, Michiyō came face to face with the reincarnated Hanzō and due to her knowledge of him she was quick enough to escape Ibuse’s paralysing poison but the others were caught, leaving her all alone. Forced to confront Hanzō, she was out of chakra and also too emotional unstable to be able to do much and broke down in tears for the first time since Hanzō’s death. Recognizing her Hanzō taunted her for showing her weakness and still holding on to useless ideas of peace, he charged at her and beat her severely. As she was seriously injured by having been infected by the poison on his kusarigama and on the ground nearly unconscious, in spite of his taunting words, to Hanzō’s shock Michiyō was able to get up and cure herself of his poison with the antidote inside her teardrop necklace she still carried, a gift from him when she was 10. She told him that she was done running and also that he had been wrong to give up on his dreams, what he could have accomplished if he had not given up so easily and that she pitied him for what he had become. As he charged at her again this time she met him head on and after beating her nearly to death, but before delivering the final Mifune arrived just in time to intervene.

C: I’m really struggling to understand the last sentence here.

Syn - Still don’t think Tsunade would trust them, or Kakashi. Regardless of if Naruto did or not. And I’m guessing Mifune saved her life?

After Hanzō was defeated by him, he repeated Michiyō’s words that he had been wrong to give up on his conviction and remembering his past and also his memories of Michiyō; Hanzō placed his faith in her and pleaded with Mifune to save her life before he committed seppuku. Afterwards Michiyō was taken to the medical unit for treatment and was unconscious for the rest of the war. While trapped in the Infinite Tsukuyomi, Michiyō dreamed that she sat by the lake in Amegakure with all her dead family and friends enjoying the sunshine. After the war, Michiyō travelled home to Amegakure to help rebuilt the village and the efforts of the Ame-nin were one of the key factors in repairing the diplomatic relationship between Ame and Konoha, resulting in the village standing stronger in the following years of peace than it had ever done before, eventually joining the newly formed Shinobi Union. Michiyō also carved a grave for Hanzō by the lake, which she visited in the years after. She also often came to visit her new friends in Konoha often, her life forever changed because of them.

Syn - This is, quite frankly, out of character for Hanzo.

First of all the emotional suppression needs to be addressed a bit - though it’s not anything against it, just expanding on it as something you may want to tweak a little bit:

Effects of consistent emotion suppression include increased physical stress on your body, including high blood pressure, increased incidence of diabetes and heart disease. In addition, people who engage in emotion suppression regularly are more likely to experience stiff joints, bone weakness and more illnesses due to lowered immunity.

Other than that little tidbit of information, you’re doing just fine when it comes to her personality!

Now regarding the genjutsu - we mentioned the Kurama clan above, and you did too. We believe the best course of action here is to just make her related to the Kuramas - Mystery Dad and/or through her paternal grandparents. They are all about strong genjutsu, so it’ll be far easier on you to just have her be part Kurama than try to make a workaround to make it something different.

Now, the part regarding her history revolving around Hanzo. If this was canon-verse Michiyō would be dead - slipping through the sewers wouldn’t be enough to save her. It’d have to go AU somehow for it to work, otherwise we’d advise him recruiting her for the academy, or rather those Namida you mention. She could still admire him for giving her a new life, or a new purpose, but this way she has a better chance of not getting killed by Akatsuki.

Her skills also need a bit of tweaking, like we mentioned above. General numbers and sprucing up her abilities all around will do Michiyō some good - maybe expand a bit on her tanto/genjutsu combination.

Syn & C

[ganymedesclock]

So we all know Keith had a go at Pidge when she wanted to leave the team to find her family. And now the closest person he has to family is gone. Some people think Keith is going to want the team to focus on finding Shiro and that's going to cause some tension in the team because the others think they should focus on ending the galra for good. What do you think?

I talked about this in an older post but really what I think is...

I feel like the team is going to be pretty united on trying to find Shiro. Especially because his disappearance is so sudden, and they have no idea how.

For Hunk and Pidge, people who part of their self-identity is being smart, is knowing what’s going on, is understanding- it would hit both of them very hard if they can’t immediately find a culprit or a lead. And furthermore, Pidge started this looking for her family. One of the major people who’s reassured her and stood by her and helped her through this? Has been Shiro. As of s1e5 she really talks about how the team feels like family. So for Pidge- it would feel like as far as she’s come, as much as she’s learned, the empire can still just reach into her life and pluck people away from her. She’d be mad.

Hunk? Hunk is a caretaker and a protector. He’d feel awful about it- he’d feel like there should be some way he saw this coming, he’s the usual voice of caution in the team, right? Did Shiro try to warn them, did he try to call for help? What’s happening to him now? It’d be really stressful for Hunk and I wouldn’t be surprised if he buries himself in trying to take care of the rest of the team because he just has to drown out his head in this situation.

Lance, I think that it’d be hard for Lance because Shiro is his personal hero, but I also think he’d be the quickest rebound, because- when Lance is hurt, he takes time, he feels that hurt, and then he comes back and can move forwards. Outside of his struggles with insecurity- it’s unlike Lance for things to stay under his skin for long periods of time, and even the insecurity is something that ebbs and flows. It isn’t as if it’d stop bothering him but I feel like Lance would be the one most able to focus.

Allura would be there with Lance, but, less because she’s okay and more because she’s very practiced at putting her own doubts and insecurities separate. Losing Shiro shakes up the chain of command, leaving her pretty much alone at the top- so I could see her doubling down on resolve and determination to try and be there for her team where she can.

I wonder if for Coran we might explore the realization of... Coran is a rather parental individual and he talked about how he couldn’t lose Allura in s1e10- I wonder if this might come with the idea that he’s really warmed to all of the paladins and losing any of them is an incredibly hard prospect.

But with Keith, I have to wonder if Keith might not be as driven as the fandom imagines. I feel like his first response might be to give up, or break down about it- because for Keith, he knows what this looks like and every other time someone’s disappeared it means they’re gone, forever, and nothing he does will be able to bring them back. I feel like while the rest of the team might be engaging with it in a “we don’t know what happened or what might be happening to him now- he might be fine, he might be in trouble, we’re trying to find him and figure out what happened,” Keith might lock into the mindset of “You don’t get it. He’s gone. People don’t disappear like this if they’re going to come back. He knew he was going to go, this is what he was talking about, this is why he kept bothering me about the Black Lion, he knew he was going to disappear and that means he’s gone forever,”

A lot of Keith’s history can be inferred, or read from his official bio, but this might be the incident that pulls it into the team’s awareness, which is... really necessary. It’s important for all of the team to really understand where they’re coming from and at this point we’ve only gotten that kind of openness from Pidge and Allura, really.

That aside, there could definitely be conflicts in the team if something major happens that forces them to put the search for Shiro on the back burner- if maybe they have a lead but what I’ve been suspecting, that the empire is going to attack Earth, happens and the team has to choose between chasing their lead on Shiro and going to defend Earth. But I don’t know what side of that debate Keith would be on, or if that’s a given.