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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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(yes I know siffrins cloak grows sleeves when its convenient but I wanna play around with this)
#also the cloak IS crafted to grow with him so I guess it being able to grow sleeves when he needs em might not be entirely untrue#tbh when I heard his cloak can grow with him my first thought was to have everyone gather under it and stretch it like a parachute lol#I think the one with like two folds stitched together to make impromptu sleeves makes more sense..#the holes are big enough to quickly fit your arms thru so its more suitable#the witch hat cloaks are designed so that witches can draw their spells without anybody seeing so its specifically to hide the users hands#siffrin doesnt necessarily need to hide his hands but he doesn’t like to be touched so I guess it just has to cover his body than hide it#idk anything about sewing or tailoring though so this is all my imagination. i dont actually know if this would work or not lol#my art#myart#doodles#I got thru a little bit more of the game and I’m coping. I’m coping#I’m imagining siffrin suplexing loop for my own sanity#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin
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exam 5 for me... tomorrow!
honestly have been feeling really nervous for this exam since my classmates have either failed it or just barely passed. and i had less time to study this time around because i rushed to book the exam.
so i drew this little encouragement early cuz i need the reminder that no matter what happens tomorrow, i did what i could and i didn't compromise on my boundaries—and that is its own victory.
and i hope that you'll be reminded to celebrate your own big and small victories too!
"You are nervous and that's okay! You did your best! You set boundaries! You took breaks! We're so proud of you, Starlight! Whatever happens, we'll always be here, cheering you on!"
#fnaf sun#fnaf eclipse#fnaf moon#fnaf dca#dca fandom#crab art#bright colours#traditional art#self-insert#my OC Esther#on a funnier note (gonna ramble)#i realized today that i could technically bring a sprite to drink in my exam#we're only allowed water in a clear drink container without any labels#so like... sprite is clear enough to work right?#and if they ask about the bubbles i'll just say it's sparking water#(i hate sparkling water but they don't need to know that)#but yeah might do that cuz i think the sugars will do me some good#3 hour exams are inhumane#anyways going to sleep now because i need sleep more than sugar#the worst thing that could happen is i fail and i have to pay another $115 to retake the exam and i receive the disappointment of my mom#i could buy a sun and moon plushie with that money#maybe even an eclipse plushie too#so the stakes are pretty high i think#if i pass i'll buy those plushies hehe#maybe just one for now because i still have more payments to make for my program#okay okay no more rambling going to sleep now
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tim drake would rather die than kill innocent people and tim drake killed hundreds of supervillain henchpeople with long-range detonation explosives that one time are two separate headcanons that, contrary to what the fandom discourse would have you believe, can actually coexist at the same time.
there’s even a psychologist term for it.
it’s called compartmentalization!
#let’s be honest#the entire batfamliy “stuffers” from this#and while that’s not something generally talked about#I just find the concept so interesting#how they all justify their actions — both socially moral and socially in-moral — to themselves#particularly how they all justify their actions to themselves in different ways#and for more evidence about their compartmentalization: there’s obviously the fact that they all have superhero and civilian identities too#also#this might need to be a separate post#but#the fandom’s perception of each member of the batfamily as individuals#often read more like they have bought into the characters’s “masks” they wear due to trauma#the “masks” being how the batfam are completely willing to be only perceived as one-thing#because that’s easier than being a real human#with blood and pain and fears and failures#they’d much rather be#the nice one#or the funny one#or the smart one#(etc. etc.)#dc#dc comics#dc characters#batman comics#batfam#the batfamily#tim drake#robin#robin dc#red robin
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🌿 DAY 9
Notes app Snufkin because I am busy help
#moomins#moominvalley#snufkin#the moomins#brought to you by my notes app#no i am not in divorce with csp i just need to doodle something real quick today because i am busy#and i wish i wasnt because i just want to nap#i have been awake for a day help finals are killing me#WHY must there be group assignments too.#well i guess it's good this one is a group assignment because that means i can get others to do the talking#okay but the pencil brush on the notes app is so good????? i might use it more often than just for emergency daily doodles
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My favourite hot take is that Simon adapts way better to being a civilian than Johnny does.
Johnny went and left for the army the second he could do so, relentlessly pushed his career and is, most likely, rarely not on base unless he's been told to fuck off or move his arse home (by either his superiors or family).
Simon on the other hand finished school and then took up an apprenticeship before joining the army. Even then he came home, took prolonged leave to help his family out. He spent way more time just living that reality. And even post Roba he was at home for a while before everything went to hell. He might not take a lot of leave since, because he has nothing to come home to, but he still knows to adjust to it.
If they take leave together Ghost settles remarkably well, still keeping an eye open but he's an adult who had time outside the forces to properly adjust to life.
Soap struggles. He gets by with his charm and bright blue eyes, and that's a good thing because he's too explosive, too intense for most normal social interactions.
He's caught somewhere between the 18 year old boy and the hardened SAS soldier and never spent enough time away to really grow into just John MacTavish. Not Sergeant, not Soap, not the FNG. Just him as a person outside of the military.
He navigates this part of his life like its a minefield. Making it through but boy oh boy, it's not looking graceful.
Ghost helps him mellow out in that regard, pointing out the messy weird mechanics of normal civilan life to him. Teaches him to enjoy that and not let his job ruin him. Simon who knows how quickly it can all fall apart can't help to see the beauty in the peace most people get to experience. He'll be damned if he can't share that beauty Johnny. Even if it's always just for a little while.
And because it's Ghost, who never steered him wrong Soap let's himself be led. Allows himself experiences outside of work and his family. And while he might not be eager to admit it, it makes him a better person.
And years down the line when they both made it out, last mission just one too many that was too close for comfort, all of that helps John MacTavish to adjust. Sure he mourns his life in the military, someone like him is bound to, but he's not too worried. He knows how to get by now. And even the days where he feels very out of his depth, he can approach with ease. Because he still has Simon at his side to show him the way forward.
#this is not meant to infantilise soap#he's a grown and very capable man#but most of his potential he put into his life as a soldier#so he might need some help to realise he's allowed to put as much and more into his personal life#also an interesting twist on how people often portray these characters#i get why it's done but ghost struggeling so much with a life he’d be more familiar with than johnny is weird to me#one of them is the youngest ever SAS operator and put all his time into his work#and its not ghost#ghostsoap#soapghost#simon ghost riley#cod mwii#john soap mactavish#johnny soap mactavish#cod mw2#cod#cod hc#ghoap
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Call me homophobic, but I don't actually think it's great representation to stick a complex, dynamic, newly-realized bisexual character permanently with a flat, boring, underdeveloped love interest just because that was the first guy who showed interest.
#in my hater era#like what you like#but goddamn#the argument that this is somehow outstanding queer representation is baffling#they have had 13 episodes to DO something with this character and they have chosen not to#no development anywhere#even though they literally brought him back so there is built-in background ripe for the picking#and yet#anti bucktommy#anti tommy kinard#the saddest part is#i don't even hate him#he's not important enough to hate#there is just absolutely nothing to him#and that's sad because whether or not he was intended to be long-term or endgame#the writers are better than this and the character SHOULD have SOME development#like why are we all swooning over 911 shoehorning in a returning character to tell a bi buck story#but treating that character like the most expendable love interest in history#i don't like him but actually i think queer characters#and especially ones who are part of such a major later-in-life bisexual realization storyline for a beloved main#deserve a little more respect than what 911 has been giving him#anyway#might delete later i don't know#also i need to stop looking at the 911 subreddit#worst takes i've ever seen that place is a cesspool
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forgot to post this the other day but i gave myself a little nameless ghoul :3
#ramble#the band ghost#ghost bc#tattoo apprentice things#couldn't pull a line to save my life that day#i had to do SO much fixing#i'm going to say it was just a really awkward placement to do on yourself bc it's right under the knee when you cross your legs#the line weight and the shading saved it and the more i look at it the less i hate it#like if you're not LOOKING for imperfections it's fine. and considering it's the 3rd one i've done on real skin#and it's a lot bigger than the others. it's FINE#i know if i got this from someone else i would NOT think 'this is a terrible tattoo'#it's not perfect but it's not bad#my mentor has said i'm being too hard on myself and she's right akdhdhfh#i might go back once it's healed and even out the thick outlines but right now it doesn't need fixing at all
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progress is incremental bUT ITS PROGRESSING
#Kastor#myart#myocs#i love both gremlin faces so he might change between them sometimes#though preferring the masked version more often#no idea how the clothing situation is gonna go#aLSO hI I THINK MY ACNE MEDS HAVE BEEN AFFECTING MY DEPRESSION MORE THAN I PREVIOUSLY THOUGHT#IM ALMOST AT THE END OF MY TREATMENT AND IM JAZZED FOR IT TO FINALLY BE OVER#HOPEFULLY I'LL FEEL MORE MOTIVATED TO DRAW#AND COMPLETE THAT ONE COMMISSION#hmmmmmm i need to make that weakpoint blend in better
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not enough discussion about the gavins' complicated relationship with feminine-coded/beauty products, i don't think.
#for klavier because it's not as direct it's about how we never see him actually wearing lipstick? even though apollo literally attends#a concert of his which is where you'd most expect him to wear makeup. but apparently he just doesnt. or at least not in public#klavier gavin#kristoph gavin#i feel like there are several ways you can read into it. the misogyny/toxic masculinity one is really obvious clearly with kristoph's#singling out of men specifically and klavier's (probably accidental?) condescending manner of calling women 'fraulein' plus his general#mildly patronising attitude towards many of the women in the game (also probably unintentional)#(i think he's trying to be charming and it's coming off wrong to some of them. like ema. and me.)#but i feel like there's also maybe an element of... inherent perfecfionism to it? like both of these products are conventionally beautifyin#products and kristoph while he is open to showing people he uses nail polish specifically chooses one that's clear and missable unless you#see him apply it. he also feels the need to justify his use of it and specifically spell it out as something he chooses to do rather than#needs to do even though duh. that should be obvious.#idk there's just something about his seeming need to take control of that narrative that i find interesting. his need to spin it into a#'there's nothing wrong with my nails but I had the foresight to see that even the smallest parts of my appearance should be kept immaculate#and it's a choice i'm making to refine an already adequate part of my personage /not/ to cover some unsightly defect.' the need to emphasis#that specifically is so. hm. and with klavier i could see it being a case of him liking makeup liking the pops of colour yet being unwillin#to admit to it because he's afraid that other people might see it as him being dissatisfied with his own appearance regardless of if he is#or isn't. or even just perceiving colourful makeup as being unseemly because it's so overt and unnatural.#like i can see this as them both viewing 'real' beauty to be that which is inherent to a person and seemingly effortless#thus somehow negating the beauty which one achieves through cosmetics or other external means.#and if you want to use external means to achieve beauty or neatness or whatever then your only valid options are those which blend into you#natural state. like clear nail polish. or really awful spray tan.#i feel like klavier's less confined by these ideas (if they hold merit at all) considering he actually owns coloured lipstick and he wears#jewellery (admittedly quite 'masculine' jewellery no gems or pearls or anything like that but jewellery nonetheless) but i think it just#makes it more interesting that he doesnt seem quite able to cross the line anyway. like it's that ingrained into his system.#anyway that's all i've got. you guys should tell me what you think too#annotations
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My sun 😔🤲🏼
#fuck my lifd#i- if i think about him for more than 5 seconds ill die because i remember why i love him#GOSH WHAT A GREAT CHARACTER#in the process destroying himself too.....#THIS PICTURE IS CALLED “goodbye one for all” ON PINTEREST I CANT KEEP DOING THIS#EVEN THAT#EVEN THE FACT THAT HE SAID GOODBYE TO THYA POWER#THAT BEAUTIFUL AMAZING POWER#ARGHH THE THING HES DOING NOW#AND HE DIDN'T EVEN STOP HERE#GOSHHHH TOSHINORI 👹👹👹👹👹👹#he needs more fans jeez#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#toshinori yagi#all might
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i need them to spontaneously combust into a ball of fire but also have a big fat gay wedding and live happily ever after it’s all very complicated
#i saw yusuke bridal carrying kurama while rewatching dark tournament a couple hours ago and the worms said what if kuwameshi#not a day goes by that i don’t think abt them. the sillies (rage)#kuwameshi#yyh#my art#wip#might finish this might not honestly idk#i think kuwabara deserves to carry yusuke around like a princess too however. i may draw that in the near future if my brain cooperates w me#but ya ik kuwabara has probably fantasized abt that on more than one occasion. he wants to be the hero!! and also have u considered#the look on yusuke’s face would be absolutely priceless#i’m yapping now i need to go to bed goodnight
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Those wacky skeletons ♥ (Patreon)
#Doodles#UT#Sans#Papyrus#Handplates#You can tell because of Sans' gloves lol#Getting-used-to-them-again doodles as well as just expressing Feeling <3 Happy towards them! Want them to be happy too!#It might seem silly for these - how many sets in now? - to still be getting used to drawing them again lol but it's because they're adults!#Their clothes and the way they hold themselves - but also especially Sans lol I dunno why I have such difficulty with him at times#He's got a cute face and I still find myself like ????how your face#Other than that tho it's just silliness hehe ♪ My favourite lads :D#I feel the need to make the distinction: I do actually have different favourites based on the AU lol#Like for example in classic I still love Flowey just a tiiiiiny bit more than Papyrus but it really is constantly neck and neck#Whereas in Handplates it's no competition even a little bit lol - Papyrus is just my Very Favourite#But Gaster is my favourite Handplates-specific character since he's unique to the AU! It gets a bit in the weeds lol#Sans isn't far behind at all of course the trio are very important! The duo even moreso imo#Going back to gloves tho I did carry over one of my quirks from my original UT doodles about Papyrus' gloves lol#I initially envisioned them as combination mitten-gloves with a free index finger and all the rest together#I still rather like the design! But it is admittedly not Handplates accurate lol#The occasional dip into self-indulgence who me? Lol#Sleeping on each other is important to me as well!! It is such a favourite hehe#Honestly I just imagined Papyrus getting so exhausted that he fell asleep in the snow lol poor lad#Sans teleported in but it's also funny to imagine him just walking up like ''you good? yeah he's fine'' *flop* haha#Silly lads <3 Do love 'em ♪
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what is it about being referred to by your name when you don't necessarily need to use it that's so incredibly intimate and disorienting. names are literally for being referred to and yet
#shitpost#i will be more off center and uncomposed and disoriented and stunned when someone says my name when they don't need to#than if they shoved their tongue down my throat#it's one thing if someone is like. calling to get your attention#or specifically referring to you when otherwise it would be unclear who's being talked about#but like. if you're in conversation and out of nowhere they say 'what do you think about that quil?' like holy shit i might as well be#naked for how intimate that feels#hello
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Killer is the only one Nightmare can't track down easily, since he can feel the others by emotion but can't usually sense Killer's unless he's in stage 1.
This is a small part of why he and Color got off on the wrong foot, because the first time Color and Killer met was when he was helping Dream fight them and he managed to pull Killer away from the main fight to try and reason with him. While they were doing that, Nightmare decided to retreat but couldn't see Killer around and couldn't find him using emotions, so he had to leave without him. (He did return later to scour the place and found Killer waiting for him, since he'd refused Color's offer to go with them.)
This became a running theme, where sometimes after a battle Killer would be gone without a trace because he was off fighting/talking with Color and Nightmare would have to come back for him later. It's also what makes Nightmare a little uneasy in present day about Killer running off to hang out with Color sometimes, because if Color succeeds in convincing Killer not to return, Nightmare has no way of tracking him down anymore. He just has to trust that Killer will return at some point, and wait.
#UTDR#UTMV#Nightmare Sans#Killer Sans#Color Sans#Dadmare#I dunno why this came to mind earlier but here it is anyway#Just a couple random hcs bundled together#About how Killer and Color met and operated at the start in my mind at least#The more they met and Color didn't poke or pry at Killer to change his situation#Their meetings became less fighting and more just. sneaking out of sight to talk#Color is new and interesting and Killer likes bothering him but he needs to be out of Nightmare's view to do it#Otherwise somebody else might jump in to ''help'' him and end up getting Color hurt#Also maybe Nightmare would be mad he was talking to an enemy#Nightmare was less mad and more worried because he was starting to get attached to Killer around the time this became more frequent#And if Killer doesn't come back it's not like he can put up wanted posters or go around the omega timeline looking for him#He would just be gone and the idea of just replacing Killer with a new one was starting to not sit right with him#Also I love mirroring their situations a little#With Killer that first time waiting patiently for Nightmare to return for him after they were seperated#And Nightmare now having to wait patiently in the hope that Killer will return to him after he's stayed with Color for a bit#I dunno if I had a point to this but Nightmare and Color have a very tenious sort of truce#It is never more than one misinterpreted action away from an all out fight#It is unclear to all involved whether Killer is blissfully unaware of this shaky ground or if he's managing both sides like a pro
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brush test slash rendering practice with ayem
#morrowind#almalexia#the elder scrolls#tes#tes fanart#art#id in alt#ok that's all the tags this needs ANYWAY#i started this 1. for experimenting with coloring from dark to light#2. because i wanted to draw someone kind of back turned to the camera#3. rendering practice for hair particularly#4. to go from sketch to rendering rather than doing lines to see if that doesn't smooth out my workflow a bit#5. because i've never actually used this brush past flat coloring#and out of those 1. i don't think i had enough of an idea of the palette or process to jump into dark to light painting so i did scrap that#and go with my usual “flat color with one of the mid shadow tones add shadows add light”#i do think that painting from shadows out is a thing people do digitally i just think this wasn't the drawing to test it on for me#i think i'd need to look at some other peoples processes and start with a more fleshed out idea of where to go#2 and 3 i think worked out. i'm gradually figuring hair out which i think is sick#4 i also think worked out for me which is also sick because i do get caught on lines a lot. they're fun sometimes but i think some drawings#benefit better from not having them and that it might be a bit faster#and of course everything i do is so that i can draw slightly faster and better for next artfight#as for 5. i have mixed feelings on this brush but that might be because i hate change. and also because i started this drawing on the 15th#of november and finished it yesterday. so im kind of just sick of working on and looking at it#it was a valuable learning experience and i think it came out well! i am also going to drop to my knees and rejoice when i can finally#close this file out and free medibang paint from under it so i can work on Literally Anything Else#thank you almalexia for being my test subject i should've used a reference for your armor when i did the sketch but i didn't#maybe the crown looks weird because of it maybe it doesn't. not my problem anymore i can draw other elves again#my art#iiii think i forgot a my art tag last time
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