#don’t get me wrong he looks super cool and hot but i think a lot about just ways to improve his life.

[maddymoreau]

[dizscreams]

Hobie x fem reader where he gets a little jealous that’s shes been hanging out with another guy and she reassures him

NO NEED TO BE JEALOUS

— Hobie Brown ★

PAIRING: Hobie Brown x Fem!Reader

A/N: The Hobie brainrot is crazy

You crawled out of bed in a rush since you were already late to your hangout with Miles, accidentally waking up your boyfriend in the process. “Where you off to?” He asked groggily watching as you quickly grabbed a shirt and shimmied into your pants. “Hanging out with Miles!”

“Miles Morales?”

“Yeah, I told you this last night.”

You smirked at his muttered “Of course its Miles” but carried on getting ready like you didn’t hear it.

You put on mascara quickly and checked the time again. “What do you do when you’re with him?” He asked curiously. You looked at him as he propped his elbow on the bed and looked at you tiredly. “Not much,” you chuckled, “He’s been helping me with my drawings recently, giving me tips and all of that boring stuff.”

He nodded and opened his mouth to say something before you cut him off, “Shit I gotta go. I’ll see you later, I love you!” You kissed his head and grabbed one of Hobie’s jackets before running off. He groaned and rolled over to put his head into his pillow. He trusted you, he really did, but he didn’t know Miles too well.

He was a good kid it seemed but you had been spending a lot more time with Miles than you were with Hobie. But Hobie wasn’t jealous, of course not! He didn’t get jealous. He just wished you spent more time with your actual boyfriend than with a kid you just met.

That was it.

That night Hobie waited in your room for you to come home. You ended up coming home at 9 o’clock at night. You stepped through the portal and immediately greeted your boyfriend. “Oh hey, you’re still here?” You asked as you sat on the bed next to him. “Yeah, you were out late.” You looked at the clock and grimaced, “Were you waiting this whole time?”

Hobie nodded in reply and you kissed his cheek, “I’m sorry I kept you waiting. Miles and I were spray painting all the spider people we’re friends with and it’s super cool. You should come see it sometime!” You ranted as you got up from your position on the bed and changed into more comfy clothes, that being an oversized t-shirt of Hobies and some sweatpants.

“You spent the whole day with him?”

“Yeah,” you replied nonchalantly as you laid down on the bed, sighing as your back his the comfy mattress.

You patted the spot next to you and Hobie moved to sit upright against the headboard. “Are you okay?” You asked looking up at him. “Fine, just fine,” he responded in a way that told you he was definitely not just fine. You put a hand on his arm and moved to prop yourself up so that you were now sitting upright against the headboard as well.

“What’s wrong?”

You would be lying if you said his crossed arms and slight pout didn’t amuse you. You knew exactly what was wrong, you just wanted to mess with him a bit. This was about Miles. Everytime you mentioned his name you saw Hobie roll his eyes or you heard a small annoyed groan. It was funny to you, but you couldn’t tell him that.

“You’re spending a lot of time with this Miles fella, don’t you think?”

You hid your smile and shrugged, “Guess so. He’s just a good friend is all.”

“A good friend?” He repeated, “You’ve known him three days tops.”

“Hobie?”

“What?”

“Do you think you might be jealous of Miles?”

He made a weird face and you laughed. “It’s okay to admit it you know,” you gave him a teasing smile and put your chin on his shoulder. “You’re kinda hot when you’re jealous.”

He rolled his eyes and gently pushed your head off his shoulder, “Shut up. Ain’t jealous.” Your smile turned into a grin, “Right, is that why you can’t even look at me when you say it?” He turned his head to look at you and gave you a glare. “Look me in the eyes and tell me you aren’t jealous,” you said with a small laugh.

“You serious?”

“Extremely.”

He hated how much fun you were getting out of this but couldn’t help the small smile that formed on his lips. "M' not jealous of some 15 year old.” You hummed, “Thought you hated labels.” He shook his head and out of no where grabbed your waist and put you on his lap. He laughed at the yelp you let out and you hit his shoulder. “You could’ve given me a warning!”

“You didn’t deserve it.”

You scoffed, “You are unbelievable, Hobie.”

“What? You don’t like me teasing you, after all you’ve said to me?” You stayed silent with a pout on your lips and he kissed your forehead, “Cmon now, ’s just fun and games, love.” “Jus fun and games, love.” You mimicked with your familiar smile returning back to your face. You laughed at his reaction before leaning in to rest your head on his shoulder and put your arms around him.

“Back to the main point, you are jealous.”

He let out a breath and nodded, “Suppose so.”

“Ha! I knew it!”

“Ay! Just a bit. Lets not forget that you were jealous of Gwen one time.”

“Okay, shut up.”

He laughed and you smiled, “I just want you to know you’re the only guy I want. You’re cooler than Miles, but don’t tell him I said that,” you warned as you observed the dumb smirk on his face. “I wont.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He put his arms around your torso and you both stayed like that until you fell asleep.

Maybe he was stupid to be jealous of Miles but the outcome was completely worth it.

[shunin-gumis]

Designs of Happiness - Track A19

L4mps Main Story Translation

Title: Way of the Sauna

Characters: Nagi, Daniel, Netaro

Summary: Nagi heads to the sauna, where he finds Daniel and Netaro already present. Daniel enthusiastically explains the greatness of a sauna to them.

Thank you aca @463ce6, myun @/myuntachis Niri @/Niri_riri and jes @/arcanecrayonn for helping me with proofing!

Location: Hakodate - Hotel Room

*knock on the door*

Momiji: Come in!

Nagi: …Good evening.

Momiji: Good evening! What brings you here this late?

Nagi: Mm… Here. 

Momiji: Oh, you’ve brought the cassette for the weekly report… Thank you for taking the time during the trip to record it! Great work today!

Nagi: You too. I brought these too… 

Momiji: Woah, flowers and… a vase!?

Nagi: I was sure you’d be needing a vase, so I brought one with me.

Momiji: Don’t get me wrong, I’m super grateful and happy for these, but I didn’t think you’d be bringing them on the trip too… 

Momiji: (Now that I think about it, Nagi had a crazy amount of luggage with him… Don’t tell me those were all packed full of flowers?)

Nagi: I brought a lot of flowers with me to counter the Yajirobe effect… Though I’m not sure it’ll be enough. 

Nagi: This trip is… too much happiness for someone like me.

Momiji: (Nagi-kun looks worried. I want him to feel more relaxed, though… Oh, I have an idea!)

Momiji: Nagi-kun, you haven’t taken a bath yet, right?

Nagi: Yeah, I’m going right after this.

Momiji: I know you could just use the bath in your room, but I’d like to suggest you give the public bath a try! It’s a really good experience!

Momiji: It even has a sauna, so I’m sure it’s a great way to refresh!

Nagi: A public bath, and a sauna… 

Momiji: Yeah!

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: I’ve never gone to either of those.

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: But okay, I’ll give it a try. 

~~~

Location: Hakodate - Hotel Sauna

Nagi: …Ah.

Daniel: Well if it ain’t Nagi! C’mon, join us. The sauna here is perfect; the temperature and humidity are just how I like ‘em.

Netaro: Uweh…

Nagi: Netaro’s here too?

Netaro: Daa here enticed me, claiming that the sauna could “clear the mind.”

Daniel: We literally just got here, and you’re even sitting on the lower bench where the temperature’s not that high. How ‘bout you, Nagi? Wanna work up a sweat on the upper bench with me? 

Nagi: Um, I’ll go with the lower one… You’re a fan of saunas, Buchi-san?

Daniel: ‘Course I am! I’ve been to about 300 saunas thanks to all my travel and business trips. I’ve even gone to Finland, the Holy Land of Saunas, too! You’re looking right at a hot-blooded sauna enthusiast!

Nagi: Woah.

Netaro: Are you certain this is supposed to make me feel refreshed…?

Nagi: The Chief recommended the sauna to me so… I figured I’d give it a shot. 

Daniel: Got it. So that makes you a beginner, too. Alright, time to put my back into this!

Daniel: I’ll teach you how to master the Iwabuchi Way of the Sauna; In other words, how to completely revitalize yourself!*

Nagi: Oh, okay. I’m looking forward to it, master.

Netaro: Master~~

Daniel: Oh, first things first: Don’t get in a sauna right after eating your fill or getting sloshed. Ain’t good manners when they gotta haul your butt-naked ass outta here.

Nagi: He’s actually serious about this… 

Daniel: One rep includes sweating it out in the sauna, then getting into a cold bath, and finally cooling off either indoors or outdoors. They say doing three reps improves your sleeping quality or somethin’.

Daniel: 7 to 8 minutes in the sauna should be more than enough for a beginner. 

Netaro: Uuugh~ There is still 5 minutes and 52 seconds, 51 seconds… 

Nagi: What about the cold bath? 

Daniel: Depends on the person, but I guess 1 minute should do? The water is bloody cold, so I wouldn’t recommend staying in there even a second longer.

Daniel: The revitalization comes after that. When you sit down somewhere and take in the breeze… That’s when the happy hormones are released, and you’re in a state of bliss. 

Netaro: I’ve read of this before! Despite the fact that the body is in a completely relaxed state, the brain achieves a state of awakening! It gets your brain juices flowing and is supposed to feel amazing! Isn’t that so? 

Nagi: That’s kinda scary. 

Daniel: Well, there’s no need to get so deep about it. If you ask me, you can revitalize right here in the sauna— 

Netaro: It’s toooo hoooot… I’m in desperate need of some water… 

Nagi: Honestly, me too. 

Daniel: I mean, people use their heads too much on the daily, y’know? That’s why it’s important to hit your limit under extreme conditions once in a while so you can just let your mind go blank.

Daniel: Just think of it as switchin’ off your brain for a sec. 

*steam intensifies*

Nagi: Hoo… 

Netaro: 3 minutes and 59 seconds… 58 seconds… 

Daniel: When you think about it, all your worries are connected either to the past or the future. But you don’t exist in either of those times, so there’s nothin’ you can do about it. It just leads to an infinite loop of anxiety. 

Daniel: Nothin’s better than holing away in the sauna to break yourself outta that loop.

Daniel: Your brain’s at full capacity just thinkin’ about how bloody hot it is, so in a way, your mind’s getting a break, letting everything else go… Now that’s what I call a detox.

*steam intensifies further*

Nagi: Oi… how much longer? A minute…? 

Netaro: *dry wheezing* Wah… tah… 

Daniel: This is just like meditation, or being mindful and all that…. Hey, are you even listening? 

Netaro: AUUUGHH IT’S. TOO. HOT!! I can’t take it anymore! There’s no revitalization happening at all!

*Netaro runs out*

Nagi: His face was bright red.

Daniel: Hahaha! Well, he shouldn’t have tried so hard. You’re doin’ pretty well though Nagi, you’ve got the makings of a true sauna enthusiast.

Nagi: I should’ve probably gotten one of those sauna hats… 

Daniel: Just let me know when you decide to get one, I’ll recommend the best one for ya.

Nagi: Okay, thank you. 

Nagi: …… 

Daniel: …… 

Nagi: (The conversation has fallen off… Should I try to start it up again?)

Daniel: …… 

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: (So I say, but I don’t even know what to talk about… What’s something we can connect on…)

Daniel: Imagine if that Ryui fella is stayin’ in this hotel too.

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: Buchi-san, I need to ask… 

Daniel: Hm? 

Nagi: Why didn’t you catch Ryui back at Hachiman-zaka? 

Nagi: (I’m pretty sure he had a better chance at catching him than I did…)

Daniel: Right… How do I put this… 

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: (It’s hot… It’s way too hot… Please answer a little faster…) 

Daniel: Well, he’s an adult too. I’m sure he’ll come home when he feels like it. 

Daniel: That’s all it is. 

Nagi: (He’ll come home when he wants to? Would it be so simple for someone who decided to leave in the first place?)

Nagi: Are you sure? If they’d change their minds so easily, they wouldn’t bother leaving in the first place, right… 

Nagi: Maybe they had some unavoidable reason to do what they did— 

Nagi: (Ryui, and that person, too…)

Nagi: (I’m sure they had their— Oh…ough…)

Daniel: Ooh, I was thinkin’ this earlier at the observatory too, but you’re actually more of a positive thinker than I thought you were, huh.

Nagi: HOT…! I’m at my limit…! 

Daniel: Haha! Another one bites the dust!

~~~

Location: Hakodate - Hotel Lounge

Nagi: Phew… 

Nagi: (The temperature was way too high… I don’t think I have what it takes to be the best sauna enthusiast there ever was…) 

Nagi: (But, it’s true that I do feel like my mind’s all cleared up. Maybe this is what he was referring to as feeling revitalized.)

Nagi: Woah… They even have all-you-can-eat popsicles… 

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: (Strawberry, grape, orange, pineapple, mango, dainagon azuki, condensed milk… There’s a lot to choose from.)

Nagi: (I want something refreshing, so I can cross out the dainagon azuki and the condensed milk flavors… They’d probably be too sweet.)

Nagi: (Strawberry and grape are quite refreshing, but when it comes to popsicles, their sourness leaves something to be desired…)

Nagi: (Mango… The tropical flavor doesn’t really fit the setting. Condensed milk is perfect for Hokkaido, but I’ve already crossed it off the list.)

Nagi: (Then all that’s left are the flavors beloved by everyone, orange and pineapple. They have the perfect amount of sourness too. Though, pineapple is also a tropical flavor.)

Nagi: (Right then. I’ll go with the safest choice that has no room for mistake, orange.)

Nagi: Is it really for free…? I hope this doesn’t affect my luck unfavorably… 

*opening the wrapper*

Nagi: …Mm, tasty.

Nagi: (Guess I picked the wrong one. This is pineapple.)

Nagi: I think it turned out for the best though.

Nagi: (Pineapple’s pretty good too. But it’s strange… I wasn’t hit by bad luck this time.)

Nagi: …Wait. 

*checking his phone*

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: (I guess my theory that the misfortune’s rebound won’t happen if the air pressure is stable is spot on after all.)

Nagi: …Huh?

Nagi: (No, this is HAMA’s atmospheric pressure. What about Hakodate—)

Nagi: (A sudden updraft, and even a ‘bomb’ mark… This looks really bad for me…)

??: ○※А◆×▽×◎……。

Nagi: Huh?

Nagi: (I hear some strange sounds from the reclining chair further ahead… Is there someone there…?)

??: Φ×▲□▽η……。

Nagi: (...The voice sounds really weak.)

Nagi: …… 

Nagi: Excuse me. Are you… not feeling well?

??: …… 

Netaro: Gii?

Nagi: Oh, Netaro?

Nagi: Are you okay? It sounded like you were moaning. If you’re not feeling well, you should talk to the Chief— 

*a ringing sound*

Nagi: …!?

Nagi: (What… is this? It’s so abnormally chilling…)

Nagi: (Why can’t I move? And I feel… really scared. Like some sort of unfathomable fear is welling up within me…)

Netaro: Hm… So be it. I was inclined to hold back for a while longer, but now that it’s come to this—

Netaro: You’ll have to suffice. 

Notes:

“Totonoi” means to experience a feeling of euphoria and a clear head by repeating several sets of sauna, water bath, and outdoor air bath. 

Sauna hats are used to prevent one’s head from heating excessively, and are traditionally made of felt.

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Masterlist

[angelmichelangelo]

I read your answer about 07 Mikey and it also kinda gives the vibes of Bayverse Mikey, specifically the version of him from the second movie. His main thing is that he wants to be out in the world and meeting new people, and he actually cries when the police turn on them and call them monsters. Im genuinely so obsessed with that scene.

I'm kinda new to the fandom and as I understand the bayverse movies are so-so in most people's opinion. But those were my initial entry point into the franchise back in like 2015/2017, so they do hold a special place in my experience.

For the actual ask: thoughts on Bayverse Mikey?

OHH OHHHH BAYVERSE MIKEY!! i do actually very much like those movies. like yourself, a big part of it is just nostalgia because i got into tmnt like as they were coming out but. they aren’t like the WORST movies ever. they have their flaws and there’s definitely a lot of things i do not like about them but.. im one of the few that will hype this movie up so. thank you for enabling me.

off the bat i wanna say everything about bayverse mikey is special to me. completely ignoring and erasing the whole. awkward weird april crush he had going on. bayverse mikey is actually so enjoyable. he’s funny he’s just Typical little brother but oh my god is he so sad :( again he’s just the perfect culmination of that whole “sociable extrovert forced to be introvert” type that most of his iterations are but this one.. this version just hits different.

one of my favourite plot points ever is that when it’s revealed that there is a very real chance that they could become human and live normal lives, the first thing leo does upon discovering this is make it VERY clear that mikey is not to find out. of course, it takes all but 10 seconds for him to find out because raph has overhears and gets SUPER offended on his brothers behalf (again. something they do SO WELL is the mikey and raph duo in this movie vs leo and a begrudging donnie, something not often done!) and of course, mikey is just so conflicted the entire movie and it’s wonderful.

he’s so tortured in that sequel. he’s SO desperate for a normal life. he has the chance, right there and leo basically snatches it out of his grasp and he kinda just rolls with it because it’s his brothers or nothing at the end of the day, and that’s SO SAD!! but going back to the whole point of leo being up in donnie’s grill like “yeah ok whatever there’s a retromutgen keep that under wraps, mikey is to NOT find out about this” just proves that each of his brothers understand how much their brother is hurting for a life of normality. i think i made a list once regarding which turtles would be most likely to want to be human/live amongst the humans and mikey almost always came up on top.

he’s always the “cool party fun dude” which is often code for comic relief character but when you look into it. these are characters that are forced into a hard, cruel life away from society. characters that for a good 15ish years, only know each other and their father. imagine mikey spending all that time, desperate for normality and for friends… like yeah he has his bros but he knows there’s more out there in the world and he wants it so much more than the others do.. and that’s why leo gets hot on donnie about keeping the retromutagen a secret. he knows what mikey will be thinking. he’s watched him play it out a million times over as kids, and leo is just so afraid that in giving him a choice, he’ll lose his brother because of it…

and when mikey does get to experience the world for the first time, he’s called a monster and almost killed. leo warned him of it and yet he still had faith that he had a place in the world only to be proven wrong almost instantly.. that’s so devastating. i remember sobbing in the theatres during that scene and i still do shed a tear when i rewatch because damn!!! mikey being sad is so gutwrenching:(((

but yes. i don’t think we ever talk about bayverse mikey and all his trauma enough simply because those movies get a somewhat bad rep. again, im not claiming them to be perfect movies. sadly all of those points i just mentioned kinda fall flat when you remember the, ahem, shell tightening comment he made… but i digress. he’s a sad little turtle that deserves more love than he’s given. and i shall love him :P

[scoops-aboy86]

I think it was @steviewashere and @wheneverfeasible who tagged me on this get to know you meme? Or something. I can’t find it now but I’ve had the questions in my notepad app and worked on answering them today and yesterday, before and after surgery. I swear I can feel the incision scar burning through the splint right now, it sucks.

Anyway, completely not proofread writing at the end for the AU question answer so I’m just gonna tag my permanent tag list and go to sleep.

Favorite Color -> Blue

Last Song -> Good Luck, Babe! by Chappell Roan

Currently Reading -> Various fanfic, all Steddie of course

Currently Watching -> I just watched The Princess Diaries for the first time in years; the line “Wait for me! No not you, I don’t even know you” still makes me cackle

Currently Craving -> Nothing, my pain meds have killed my appetite, it’s obnoxious. But I did get a boba tea the night before my surgery just because I wouldn’t be allowed to have anything in the morning.

Coffee or Tea -> Tea. I can’t do coffee, it hits me just wrong enough that I end up vibrating at a frequency dogs can probably hear and I become an unsafe driver.

A hobby you would like to try -> I wouldn’t mind learning how to crochet (again, but actually retain it this time) or expand my knitting skills beyond scarves and square dishcloths.

An AU you're working on/thought of -> i reread my post from the other… week? (Time is an illusion and I’m on gd drugs.) And I want to clarify that I was envisioning Steve as still in high school, Eddie as a high school band director. Because I don’t think I was super explicit about that. And maybe Eddie is in his mid twenties, not early.

Chrissy is in the color guard, because it’s cheerleader adjacent, but so is Nancy because she gets to toss sabres and (wooden) rifles as well as flags. Tammy Thompson is one of the assistant drum majors but is not the best at following the drum major instead of conducting by ear, so there are some phasing problems (band gets off because the speed of sound lags, etc.). Fred is in the pit, on the xylophone and triangle and shit. Patrick plays the timpani. Gareth is in the battery on snare drum, not section leader but that’s a lot of responsibility he’s not sure he wants anyway. Tommy plays saxophone. If Argyle is there he’s in the tuba/sousaphone section, no question.

And like I said, Steve plays clarinet because it’s the easiest instrument to march with. He is the reluctant babysitter of all the freshmen playing third or fourth part with him: Will, Dustin, and Mike. Lucas is in the saxophone section, trying to be cool, but comes to Steve for help because Steve may be a sub-par musician but his marching technique is flawless. Max is on piccolo and will intentionally blast the high notes to fuck you up. 

El plays oboe very competently in concert band but is having a hard time adjusting to mellophone on the field, scraping by with the help of her senior section leader, Kali; by the end of the season they’ve thoroughly bonded as brass sisters and get matching tattoos. It does cause problems because her dad is still police chief Hopper, who gives stern/frustrated lectures to Kali (paid for it), Steve (gives El and her stepbrother Will to rehearsals, along with the rest of the kids, so Hopper assumes he must have known; he didn’t), and Eddie (adult in charge of these hooligans, but sporting tattoos of his own, not really on display unless he rolls up his sleeves on hot days when the school AC is on the fritz).

Those lectures are somehow or another the closest anyone comes to figuring out that Steve and Eddie are together, causing both of them to panic. On Eddie this looks like trying to break it off before things blow up so Steve can have a normal life; Steve, on the other hand, doubles down hard on keeping the best and most loving relationship he’s ever had (absent parents, dating teens who only want him for his pretty face and reputation for being good in bed) and like. Wears lingerie to school under his clothes. Because you don’t have to deal with PE class and locker rooms during marching season!!

Steve is still captain of the basketball team because that’s in the spring and doesn’t overlap with marching season. Eddie comes to all of the games as a “show of school spirit,” and afterwards they meet somewhere in the woods for Eddie to either congratulate his boy on a win or console him after a loss. Sometimes Steve has to console him after too much stress eating from the student-run concession stand if it was a really close game though—sometimes in a not so sexy way before Eddie learns the hard way to steer clear of the loaded chili dogs, but even on those occasions Eddie is blearily impressed that someone so young can be so sweet and caring. 

Most of the guys he dated prior to Steve were more interested in hooking up and/or playing rough without a lot of tenderness beyond basic aftercare, mislead by his wild hair and tattoos and the assumption that a school teacher wouldn’t want to be in an openly gay relationship. Which… okay, it’s not like he’d put leather daddy photos in his cramped little office off the band room but it is a modern AU, he can have a partner that he can casually mention in the teachers lounge without it being a big deal. But his dating profile never seemed to attract the kind of guys that would want that, he never did figure out how he was going wrong there—though to be fair, before Steve he’d kind of assumed that’s what he’d wanted too.

As far as kink goes, Eddie doesn’t take it too far with an actual high school student, for all that Steve isn’t jail bait. He introduces Steve to edging, both ways, and Steve loves it—cries so pretty when he begs, and on the flip side is relentless in getting Eddie to wait and wait and then come like a teenager over and over again. No bondage more extensive than creative use of a bandana or a tie or, on one memorable occasion, a seatbelt. Eddie is meticulous about teaching Steve all about consent, checking in regularly, the stoplight system, safe words, talking things out before and after, etc., figuring that if this is just a school year fling that at least he’s setting his sweet boy up for success in future relationships—though the idea makes him sad and his insides squirmy with jealousy. He’s not possessive exactly, but when he’s in that mood he gets extra attentive in a way that Steve seems to lap up like sweet cream.

They’re monogamous, although they both agree that Steve can’t just stop dating around without raising questions about who he is seeing. So Steve still goes out with girls sometimes, the ones that seem okay with setting low expectations for both intimacy and commitment. Dinner and a movie and maybe a little making out, because neither Steve nor Eddie are puritanical about kissing. There aren’t a lot of second dates and even fewer third dates, with only occasional fallout no matter how clear and upfront Steve is about not wanting anything serious. He always feels bad about those instances, needing lots of reassurance from his secret older boyfriend that he’s not the asshole some people think he is, that he did his best and going over the situation for things he could handle better next time. And sex, to reaffirm their own relationship behind the public facades.

The only reason Eddie hasn’t bought an engagement ring by spring is because he doesn’t want to be presumptuous, but he knows what kind of ring he would look for, what kind of things Steve would like if he did. He’s talked to his friends Jeff and Grant (Unnamed Freak) about Steve, because they have nothing to do with the school and know him well enough not to be concerned that he’s some sort of predator. Jeff, who’s settled down with a nice girl (his own age) and already started looking ahead to planning a family, is loud in his approval of Eddie’s shifting taste in men from casual hookups and one night stands to something more committed, even if it’s on the unconventional side. “You seem a lot happier, man. I think it’s good for you, in the long run, no matter how it shakes out.” At which Grant laughs and says, “Yeah, at the very least you’re healing your own teenage trauma of never being able to get a popular prettyboy jock like you wanted. You’re growing up, dude! And it’s less than a ten year age gap, that’s gonna feel like nothing once he’s outta college. No one’ll even bat an eye at it by then.” Which, Grant might be a little biased because his parents are nine years apart, but it makes Eddie grin. It’s nice to have supportive friends.

(He finds out years later that Gareth, the sophomore on snare and Grant’s cousin, also knew the entire time and was just really good at keeping secrets. Mixed feelings on that one. Partly because the reveal happens in a speech at his and Steve’s wedding and he nearly falls out of his chair in front of sixty people.)

Oh and the entire time they’ve been together Eddie has been slowly but steadily putting on weight because one of Steve’s hobbies is baking and he just generally is a decent cook because he’s a latchkey kid who got tired of fast food, frozen meals, and stuff made from a box. For a long time Eddie’s excuse for the weight gain (to the world at large and to some extent himself) is that he quit smoking when he got the school job because he didn’t want to encourage any of the kids to think it’s cool—not since his Uncle Wayne’s diagnosis of early stage lung cancer, which won’t take the stubborn bastard out soon but it’ll happen someday and rip Eddie’s heart right out. So yeah, he went cold turkey and straight to stress eating.

He’d be more self conscious about it if Steve hadn’t always been something approaching reverent when touching his love handles, even when they were still faint little rolls over the top of his jeans the first time they hooked up. The boy has this intent look in his eyes whenever Eddie eats something he made, lighting up like the sun at any sign that Eddie likes it. Feeds him little treats and beams whenever Eddie licks the crumbs from his fingers, so of course Eddie does it as often and with as much gusto as possible. It’s not like he eats unhealthily all the time, he does his daily fruits and veggies and reasonable portions… But he snacks, so sue him. And he never turns down Steve’s treats.

That’s all I’ve got for now! I’m really not writing this, I just enjoy rotating it in my head like a rotisserie chicken.

Tagging to read and answer these too if you want but no pressure: @hotluncheddie @lawrencebshoggoth @sofadofax @kissinvampires @oatmilk-vampire

@wheneverfeasible @hamiltonswiftie @grtwdsmwhr @yesdangerpls@theseaofdespair

[froizetta]

Since it's WIP Wednesday, I've decided to post an excerpt from a longer WIP to motivate myself to write it! If it's technically on the internet, I can't just not finish it, can I? Right??? Fingers crossed I can make this a regular thing with other WIPs...

So anyway, here's part of chapter 1 from my early-career superbat identity porn fic!

“The thing you’ve gotta remember,” Jimmy said firmly with a slightly overenthusiastic wave of his jack and coke. A little bit of liquid sloshed out onto the countertop. “The thing you gotta remember. Is.” He blinked. “Ah, cripes. What was it again?”

Clark absently took a sip of his own drink. The whisky was at least a pleasant burn in his throat, even if it wasn’t exactly his favorite flavor. “Gee, I don’t think I can help you with that, Jim.”

Jimmy beamed. “Oh yeah! The thing you’ve gotta remember is, that there’re plenty of fish in the sea.”

Clark couldn’t quite suppress the wry quirk to his smile. “Wow. That’s some original advice right there.”

“No, but for real though!” Jimmy insisted, slamming an emphatic fist on the table. “Just. So many fish. A whole ocean! Of women! And, uh, also not women!”

“That does sound like a lot of people.”

“Exactly,” Jimmy said, nodding sagely. “You’ve just gotta widen your net, is all. To more than, like, one fish-woman.”

Ah, yes. Clark was honestly a little surprised it had taken him five drinks to bring it up. Apparently, Jimmy had needed some Dutch courage before embarking on the ‘romance advice’ portion of the evening.

Clark could humor him on it, at least. “You mean Lois?” he asked.

“Yeah I mean Lois! Don’t get me wrong, Lois is great. But she’s just one fish,” Jimmy said emphatically. “Like, sure, maybe she’s a really cool fish. Like… Like koi or something. Koi are actually pretty amazing, did you know they—” He paused and then shook his head. “Wait, no, this isn’t the time for fun fish facts. What I mean is, just because koi are cool, doesn’t mean there aren’t equally cool salmon. Or tuna. Don’t let the koi blind you to all the…the really hot tuna around you. You know?”

Jimmy looked concerningly pleased with his increasingly labored metaphor. Clark charitably chose to blame this on the alcohol rather than Jimmy’s abilities as a writer. “Maybe you’re right, Jim. I guess it’s pretty silly to be so stuck on her, huh?”

Jimmy frowned. “Well, I wouldn’t say that. I think you guys would be great together, you know that.”

“I’m not sure her new fella would agree with you,” he said. Embarrassingly, the glumness in his tone wasn’t entirely feigned.

“Don’t be so pessimistic,” Jimmy said insistently. “We don’t know that it’s like that. Maybe it’s just a pity date?”

It wasn’t just a pity date, Clark was pretty sure about that. Lois had been wearing the perfume she wore whenever she wanted to impress someone. And yes, that was a creepy thing to notice, but he couldn’t help it, okay? Super-senses make a lot of things really hard to ignore.

He shrugged. “Maybe. But it’s none of my business anyway. I know she doesn’t see me that way, and that’s fine.” And it was. He knew that to Lois, he was just a coworker – and a bumbling, awkward, country bumpkin of one at that. Even though he definitely hammed up the act to create distance between Clark Kent and Superman, the real Clark Kent still wasn’t the kind of guy who would appeal to someone like Lois. She’d want someone classy and sophisticated. Someone like her.

Probably someone like whatever guy she was on a date with right now, in fact.

“And, I mean… it's Lois,” he added, as neutrally as he could manage. “She’s out of most people’s leagues. It’s not— I mean, I never really thought I had a shot with her, you know? So I’m not about to get all bent out of shape because of one date. Honest.”

Apparently, this wasn’t what Jimmy had wanted to hear, at least judging by the way his face fell. “What? No no no, that’s not what I— Look, I’m not trying to say you don’t have a chance there. In fact, I think she’d be lucky to date you. But what I mean is, it’s not the end of the world if she doesn’t see that. You’re an awesome dude! I just think you deserve to be happy, with or without Lois.”

“Oh,” Clark said, then blinked and ducked his head, taken aback by how hard that had hit him. Jimmy really was a great friend. He suddenly felt guilty for spending their evening together daydreaming about eating pizza on his couch. “Shucks, Jim, that’s…that’s real nice of you to say.”

“I’m not being ‘nice’, I’m being honest. Listen veeery closely, Clark.” Jimmy set his glass down and grasped Clark around the shoulders, looking him straight in the eye.

Clark tensed. “Um. What’s happening.”

“Shush,” Jimmy said. “You’re listening.”

“I am?”

“You are. Now focus and take this in. Really internalize it.” His gaze was a little unsteady, but still intense and undoubtedly sincere. “You – Clark Kent – are a bona fide catch.”

Clark couldn’t help but let out a snort of laughter. It would be easier to take Jimmy seriously if he wasn’t starting to slur his words. “A ‘catch’? Are we still on the fish metaphor?”

Jimmy blinked. “What? No, no. Look, you’re smart, you’re a successful reporter. You’re probably the nicest guy I know. And you’re tall, like…what, 6’1”? 6’2”?”

“Something like that,” Clark half-lied with an easy smile.

“Yeah, so. Tall. Trust me, as a short guy, that’s a big plus. Everyone loves tall guys. You’re, you know, the tall, dark and handsome type. Like Superman!”

His smile froze. “Oh?”

“Yeah! Chicks love Superman. Not saying you look much like him, of course—”

“Of course,” Clark agreed.

“—but you’ve got, like. A similar appeal.” He squinted up at Clark. “You know, I’m not the best judge for this type’a thing, but if I feel like you’d clean up real nice if you made the effort.”

“Hm. I dunno, Jim…”

Jimmy was insistent. “You could change up your style, maybe. You ever tried contacts?”

“I’m afraid they don’t really agree with me,” Clark said apologetically. Which was true, in a sense. The glasses were pretty integral to the whole secret identity thing, after all.

“Shame,” Jimmy said, finally letting go of Clark to lean back. But as he did, something over Clark’s shoulder caught his eye. He grinned. “Oh, hey, my first piece of evidence that you’re a catch: I’m 90% sure that guy is checking you out right now.”

“What?” Clark said and made to look behind him.

Before he could turn, Jimmy grabbed his face in both hands. “Shhhhh!” Jimmy said urgently, even though Clark wasn’t saying anything. “You can’t just look. That’s waaay too obvious.”

Clark was pretty sure Jimmy was being more obvious than looking himself would have been, but he stayed obligingly still while Jimmy peered over his shoulder at the mystery man.

“Okay,” Jimmy said eventually. “So I’m not great at telling when guys are hot, but I’m pretty sure this guy is hot. And, again, definitely into you. I’m 95% sure.”

“I thought it was 90%?”

“Sure, but I’ve accumulula… accumama…” He frowned and shook his head. “I’ve got more evidence since then, see? So I’m surer now!”

In retrospect, he probably should have insisted on Jimmy eating something more substantial than bar snacks over the last couple hours. “Sure, Jim,” he said gently. “It’s, uh, getting pretty late, though. Maybe we should head home soon?”

“It’s—” Jimmy squinted his watch and balked. “It’s only 10:30, so no way! I’ve got a new mission now, and it’s to wingman you with this probably hot guy. Trust me, I’m a great wingman.”

Clark raised an eyebrow. “Are you? What would you even do?”

“You know, the usual. Hey, have you met my friend Clark? He’s like 6’2” and a hotshot reporter at a big newspaper. And then I just slide out—” he made a slow swoop with his hand “—and just like that, bam! Take that, Lois! Clark’s got a hot date of his own!”

Clark raised the other eyebrow. “That’s…not particularly subtle.”

“Well, subtlety isn’t a part of the Olsen Wingman Experience. But it works!” Jimmy said brightly. “I even managed to wingman my ex-girlfriend while we were still dating, although that was mostly an accident. But it was still very effective. Thanks to that, I know for sure it works.”

“Oh!” Clark said. And then frowned. “Oh. I’m, uh. I’m sorry to hear that. Do you wanna talk about—”

“Nope,” Jimmy said firmly, decisively. “Tonight isn’t about my borderline traumatizing romantic history, tonight is about you. You and this totally hot guy who I’m, like, 99% sure is into you.”

“Mm. I see you’ve accumulated more evidence.”

“Yeah, actually! I—” Jimmy’s eyes widened. “Okay, crap. It’s 100% now. He’s coming over here.”

Clark blinked. He’d been half-convinced Jimmy had just been imagining things, but… “He is?”

“He is! Just be cool, okay?”

“Jim,” he began in protest, but before he could say anything else there was a presence at his back. Clark turned to greet the stranger. And stared. Because— Huh. Huh?

Either those whiskies had been a lot more effective on him than he’d thought, or that was Bruce Wayne leaning ever-so-casually against the bar next to him.

[vellichorom]

speaking of which, regarding the last post I’m a little curious, how would YOU design Stanley according to his canon design? Feel free to ignore this though it’s just a little silly thought.

same anon that asked about drawing goreguts fanart,,, don’t worry it is in my thoughts I just have art paralysis 🫡

watch in AWE ladies & gentlemen, as i paint myself as a massive hypocrite

not like i'm really designing stanley to be super pretty & handsome but-

so,, in the beginning, my sibling designed a stanley that i fatefully gave a narrator to! so when they made a narrator design themselves, it seemed only befitting that i again, supply & give that boy a stanley;

thus, for my sibling's narrator Evelyn, a narrator turned multiverse overseer after his game was destroyed by dataminers fucking around, i gave him a stanley that narrowly survived the destruction - but not unscathed;

behold the derogatorily dubbed " Glitch, " who went from having a face to Not having a face,

( his ruined texture face based off of The Theater creepypasta's swirly head man, because i thought it was really cool at the time )

...but i'm not very proud of " Glitch " these days; i admittedly kind of made him on a whim a couple years back, vaguely based off of popular fan designs i enjoyed, & didn't put a lot of time or effort putting any special twist on his design beyond... the obvious,

if i had to redesign him now, i'd make him look MORE akin to a broken game model, more OBVIOUS than just the little face quirk. & i'd just use the GIVEN stanley design that the game gives us.

that goes for just designing the man as is as well.

FEW people these days seem to embrace or even refer back to stanley's canon design, painfully basic though it may be, the fact remains that he HAS a design already. it's kind of odd seeing so many people diverge so FAR from it, changing the basics of turning his curly hair straight or going AS far as to making him an anime-looking little boy. & i get why, to some degree - AT LEAST regarding the simpler aspects of switching up the design a little bit for interpretation's sake - adding a Bit more variety when your character IS just the most basic white guy alive. nothing really wrong with that, i'm dabbling in the same in other fandoms, but going SO FAR in making that Middle Aged Man a magical hot anime guy to go with your magical hot anime " Old Man,, " makes me a bit sick to think of tbh!

of course, saying all this & wondering " oh gee why don't people stick with canon more... " i'm heavily tainted by bias in thinking @tomiechu's stanley is one of the best alternative designs ever & the ONLY one that could ever go with my narrator.

NOT like his design or attitude has gone terribly far FROM the given path, & he CERTAINLY isn't a little handsome pixie twink boy. he's just stanley ❤️ & the one i'd rather fall back on ANYWAY rather than make a design of my own. look at him

[spirkbitch]

I want to like… watch SNW so bad because the special effects we’re capable of now are so improved and seeing familiar characters fully realized with new technology is awesome. But SNW makes me feel weird because it radically changes everything I loved about characters in the original series. Especially Spock. While also implying these changes are canon for some reason, because it’s a prequel.

Part of the reason I was able to enjoy the AOS movies (in all their SFX lens flare glory), despite the plots being… questionable at times was because it was an alternate universe. Even with the TOS Spock cameo, the integrity of the original series is kept intact because it’s not a prequel.

Also this isn’t to say people can’t or shouldn’t enjoy SNW. If you like it that’s awesome and I’m all for you enjoying it. This is only my explanation for why I and possibly others have reservations.

100% agree. a lot of the stuff snw has done (especially special effects wise) are very cool and (from what i’ve watched) the show can be very enjoyable. but it’s disappointing because it feels like it could have been a way to actually explore these characters but in reality all they did was write their own characters and slap the same name on them. and, just like you said, it would be so much easier to enjoy if they weren’t so set on insisting it’s all canon.

and it seems like a lot of people don’t want to hear what’s wrong with it, which is fine. if you really like it and don’t really care or don’t want to talk about continuities and implications for tos that’s cool just scroll past those posts i guess, but it feels like whenever it gets brought up someone has to claim that none of your concerns are valid because it’s a good show and it’s like, y’all can enjoy it. there’s no problem with enjoying it, but don’t try and shut down any conversation that isn’t praising it.

like it being an enjoyable show and it having a lot of problems and continuity issues are not mutually exclusive. plenty of people like the changes they’ve made and i’m happy for those people. but we don’t need to act like just because people like it that means there’s nothing wrong with it.

i personally can’t stand what they did to Christine, why make her so badass and hardcore if it just retroactively makes her tos character seem sad by comparison. like i’m sorry but you can’t just show me that this character that i know as usually very calm, reserved, helpful, maybe a little too intense about her crushes (but who can blame her for that), but mostly keeps to herself, was actually super badass (and nearly unrecognizable personality wise) 8 years ago and expect me to be happy about that. like, what happened to her? why wouldn’t you just make that a new character? it’s like whoever wrote her in snw saw tos chapel, decided she was boring, and then made her not boring anymore. and people act like snw did some crazy feminist power move by making her this powerful badass but it’s really just disappointing. hot take: making a woman you deemed boring not boring anymore isn’t feminism. (like women can have personalities other than powerful badass and it can still be feminist, she can be calm and caring and reserved and you could have still made her a feminist symbol, but instead they changed her character entirely)

and don’t get me wrong i love snw chapel (she’s very awesome and i have a crush on her), i just wish she was her own character (like if it were an alternate timeline). especially because this little relationship they’re writing makes her tos character look like such a creep towards Spock.

i don’t care how much you tell me it’s a prequel, those are not the same character. Spock too, you can’t convince me he would actually ever act anything like he does in snw. and people always want to say that since it’s a prequel of course they’re going to act different, yeah different i would be fine with, but these characters are unrecognizable.

and none of that means i think people shouldn’t like it or shouldn’t watch it. i just don’t like how it seems like some fans of snw seem to wish there would be no discussion about it, while also placing themselves into the discussions about it. if you like the show and disagree with my opinions on it, either ignore me or discuss it with me, don’t reply just to tell me that i shouldn’t have that opinion.

like seriously did y’all see that reblog argument where i explained my opinion and their only response was pretty much “but i like it and it’s enjoyable” i mean i said it was a bad prequel and their response for why they think it’s a good prequel was that ‘they bend canon’ and that ‘they aren’t too precious about canon characters’ like what? that can be why you like it but i cannot even begin to see why you would think that makes it a good prequel. bending canon and fucking around with well established and well loved characters does not seem like the formula to make a good prequel. (i couldn’t even reply because that reply made so little sense to me)

plus like why are people shocked that people have issues with it? it’s a prequel, either stick closer to the canon material or accept that people are going to be upset with it.

okay sorry the rant is over now

[pluckysidekick]

Nancy Drew Season 4 Trailer Part 4

I’m back with another obsessive breakdown of the 30 seconds of mayhem that is the S4 trailer. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 here. My method of madness - connect the dots with all of the behind the scenes content, social posts, podcasts, and articles to figure out a possible episode and any context we can glean about what the heck is going on. Remember it’s all still speculation so please don’t come back and tell me how wrong I was later (but feel free to tell me when I was right 😀).

Next up we have demons! Love this enhanced reaction shot from @nancydrewgifs’s gif on the bird app.

Much to discuss. From Ace and George’s wardrobe (and hair), this looks like Episode 5 - this is the episode featured in the official season announcement, directed by Scott Wolf, and with lots of cool scenes shared by Kennedy like this one and this one.

We have two other visual clues that make it more complicated. Bess is wearing her hair up like she wears with the sexy business dress w/name tag (as well as the official promo shot in the white blouse), and she’s got on the black and white coat from this blue screen scene.

And then Kennedy is wearing (I think) this super hot black dress under the blue denim jacket from the same timeframe. That last shot is from DP Nick Thomas - another woods scene that could be from Ep. 5 based on the timing (with stand-ins).

So Episode 5 (if all of this is Ep. 5) has a confrontation in the woods with a demon, a scene in the Claw with some kind of function that requires a name tag (a singles mixer? A pre-law/law school event?), Bess using magic, Nancy and George at a university, multiple scenes in the woods, and one in Icarus Hall with the Crew.

Many have also noticed that Ace is almost always on the outside of any grouping and sometimes apart from the others. Is this because he and Nancy have to stay apart due to the curse, or is it simply a visual framing device?

Speaking of Ace, the women are all dressed up while Ace is in another denim on denim look - is there an event where Nancy’s looking gorgeous but she doesn’t get to dance with Ace? GAH. We need a Nace slow dance in the worst way. Kennedy certainly hinted at Nancy’s agony at being at a party with Ace and not being able to interact with this tweet response to @sflcwers:

Now it’s possible the black dress is for the timey whimey prom Henry’s dressed for, and maybe the trailer’s demon scene is actually from episode 6 with some wardrobe holdover from 5, as they sometimes do.

My biggest question is - what the heck is Nancy holding in the trailer shot above? A magical MacGuffin that will help them fight the threat to the town? A weapon? A giant CHESS PIECE? It sort of looks like an oversized rook, and Kennedy previously gave us a chess EMOJI CLUE.

What if there’s some kind of chess-related mystery that relates to the sins of the past that they have to solve throughout the season? They have to find these chess pieces to save the town! Could it be something the Icarans planned from Icarus Hall? There’s quite a medieval fantasy theme going on with the crossbow, Nancy’s flower crown, and the Icarans sighting in Icarus Hall in the trailer.

OK, pure conjecture on my part, and the chess piece emoji could simply signify Game Night (which if so, yay!), but I LOVE a good mystical scavenger hunt a la the Horcruxes. I realize I may be going full on Beautiful Mind. Please give me your thoughts and theories in the comments/tags!

We still have those Icarans and spiders and proms and that NACE scene and Big Poppa Nancy to talk about, but these will have to wait for future posts as I’ve reached my photo limit here (sad). I’ll be back soon…

[jayflrt]

🎀 update since it’s been a while

haiiiii i haven’t been on tumblr in 5ever. i feel like im only ever on here now when u update LMAO. speaking of LIVING for jay/yn. it’s AMAZE. i’m also every excited for the next update. but anywho how have you been! we haven’t spoke in forever i really can’t remember what my last update was abt so im just gonna skim thru things!

like since the start of this year ive been SUPERERRR into f1 so i made a podcast! (podcast in question is my cf on my spam account 🥸) 😅😅 i’ve always liked it because my brother did but i’ve gotten more into it. i also took a listen to romance untold and it’s SO good my favs r defff moonstruck and royalty 🔥.

lowk this summer has been chill like any other. i went to a couple parties with my friends but then after that not much happened. there’s no guy updates bc unfortunately my life is no longer a wattpad story because that was very hard on my emotions 😅😅. i’ve lowk sworn off relationships for a while. obviously not completely but i don’t know recently a friend pointed out to me that whenever im in one its very tolling on my emotions and it’s not good so i don’t want that to happened again. i was also just not in a good place when arsal/cameron/marcus happened. REST ASSURED I AM BETTER NOW!!! #weUP

about my friends it’s going nice! we’re kinda doing our own thing since it’s the summer however one of them, m (i think i name drop too comfortably on here), recently started talking (ish) to a guy and she’s kinda obsessed with him. like it’s in a weird way in where she full blown cancelled plans that we made like 5 days prior just bc she had last minute plans with him so 😃😃😃😃 i’m so happy for her!! (NOT). i have to be honest there’s nothing wrong with him other than the fact he looks like he SNUCK ONTO EARTH WHEN THEY FIRST WALKED ON THE MOON. so 🤗🤗🤗🤗

i have been writing a LOT more recently. like not even just because it’s kpop i don’t know i get the inspiration to write and just open a google docs document. like for instance one of them the plot is mc breaks up with sunghoon and becomes closer to heeseung but plot twist! they’re in a band and there’s DRAMAA 🔥🔥🔥. and then another one is where mc and jake r ENEMIES bc her dog tried impregnating jake’s dog at a dog park 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥. one of them is a sunghoon fic that’s heavily inspired by cmbyn (MINUS THE GROOMING) the other is a jay prank call au where he calls her bc he remembers his highschool sweetheart and she doesn’t even spare him a thought 🔥🔥🔥🔥. there’s a single dad sunghoon au somewhere in there. MY GOOGLE DOCS IS COOKING.

however i don’t think i could ever post it to tumblr. maybe one day when anyone is interested ill send in a little snippet of one of them 🤗 or dm u one of them and reveal my identity 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮. but i don’t know! i’ve tried writing on tumblr before but i was in highschool when i tried soooooo. i also think that im just too busy. maybe one day when im not so busy 🔥.

but yeah that’s really it 🤗🤗. but update me if anything cool is happening in ur life. r YOU having a hot girl summer. i also think u said you went on a trip recently (?) IDK. but pleeeekkk update me - 🎀

hihi 🎀 anon !! omg please i'm honored you're sticking around to update me 🥹 they're MUCH appreciated i love reading them <3 and thank you sm for tuning into yfi786 🥰🥰

omg i have a few friends who are super into f1 too!! the races look like they must be so fun to go to :') YKWW the close friends story podcast is always sm more fun to tune into than an actual podcast 🙂‍↕️ my fav rn is brought the heat back it's just been playing in my head 24/7 and that vocal run from jay hello!!!! moonstruck and royalty are SO good though they're definitely up there for me too

i'm glad your summer's been chill !! it's always nice to just have time to unwind before getting back to the uni grind 🥲 honestly relationships/situationships can take so much out of you mentally so i'm glad you don't have to feel that way anymore!! and im glad you get to spend the summer with your friends 💗

OMG NOOOO YOUR FRIEND NEEDS TO RUN FOR THE HILLS 😭 why would she cancel your guys plans like that?? LMFAOOO PLS we're always losing an angel to an ugly man 😞💔 no that's so upsetting tho :( i hope she gets over him he's not worth cancelling plans with friends over!!!!

omg wait SLAY 😌 the rush of writing inspiration always feels so so good and i hope it lasts a long time for you!!! HELP NOT THE DOGS MATING AT THE PARK 😭 but okay i see you grinding through those plots!!! 🔥 the google drive is being FED and oml if you ever feel like sharing,, my asks are open 🤭 also yeah that makes sense!! i don't bother with aesthetics because it's just sooo time consuming,, like don't get me wrong i'd love to have a super cute theme and stuff but it's def a lot of work :')

omg yes i went on a little trip with my friends :')) we did that thing where we pulled our vacation plan out of a hat LMFAO but it was fun!! i'm very sick of flying tho! 🫤 NO hot girl summer just hot corporate slave summer 😩 i have been trying to pick up new hobbies though because i just dropped my habit of doomscrolling on tiktok 🤧

[moonlight404-translates]

A3! Guy | R - Sparkling Beach Ball | Translation

Quote: “I’m quite sure Mikage likes penguins. I hope this bag can make him happy…"

Special thanks to my friends for helping me with ideas for some lines (´｡• ᵕ •｡`).

————————————-

Disclaimer: Neither english or japanese are my native language, but I did my best with the translation. If you find any mistake, feel free to tell me. By the way, Director’s name will be Izumi.

Trying your summer luck /1

Guy: … Azuma: Ah, Guy. Hisoka: ZzZz... Azuma: Hisoka and I were talking until a bit ago, but he put his head on my knees and, no longer after that, fell asleep. Guy: I understand. He’s also holding his penguin body pillow like always. Azuma: Not for nothing is Hisoka’s favorite. Azuma: It feels refreshing to see Hisoka sleeping while hugging his penguin, don’t you agree? Guy: Indeed. Azuma: Are you going out, Guy? Guy: Yes. I planned to get some cookware supplies for the bar. Azuma: The temperature is high, so be careful out there.

Omi: …Okay, I’m going to crush the biscuits, so you whip the fresh cream, Director. Izumi: Gotcha!

Guy: Are you two making sweets? Omi: Yeah, I wanted to make a yogurt mousse cake. Guy: It sounds delicious. Izumi: Huh? Omi: What’s wrong? Izumi: The mixer stopped working… I think it’s broken. Omi: Ah… so it finally reached the end of its lifespan. Izumi: It has been used for a long time. Omi: We can use a whisk or other cookware instead, just for today. Guy: I can buy a new mixer in that case. I’m going out to buy some things. Izumi: Are you sure? It’ll make your bags heavier… Guy: One mixer won’t make a difference. Omi: I feel bad to ask you this, but can you buy it for us? Guy: Yes, there’s no problem. Chikage: Oh, are you going out too, Guy-san? Guy: I plan to do it. Chikage: I’m going out as well. If you want, we can go together in my car. Guy: Since you’re offering it… I will gladly accept. Chikage: If you need anything, we can buy it while we’re out. Izumi: Can you? Then—.

Guy: (I successfully acquired the cookware needed. Now Utsuki is…) Chikage: Sorry for making you wait. Guy: Could you get what you wanted? Chikage: Yes, I bought the items from the current World Retort-Pouch Curry Fair that caught my eye. Guy: That’s good. Chikage: I also got what Director-san wanted. So we completed all our missions. Guy: Yes. I suggest going back home now that we’ve finished. Guy: …Hm?

Trying your summer luck /2

Chikage: What is it? Guy: That is… Chikage: …? Chikage: A pile of penguin goods…? Employee: These are raffle goods! Would you like to pull one? Employee: Children would love them! Chikage: …You might not have a child, Guy-san, but they think you do. Guy: Mhm… Employee: Our top prize is this big cushion. Many people who take the challenge aim for it! Employee: We also have other items you can use in your everyday, like mugs and drink coasters!  Guy: … Chikage: Wait, are you going to do it? Guy: Yes. I think it is a good present for Mikage. Guy: Since he likes using his penguin pillow body a lot. Chikage: …Well, I guess that guy would be happy with it. Guy: Allow me to try once. Employee: Of course, thank you! Then, please pull one of these here~. Guy: …

Chikage: We’re back. Izumi: Welcome~. Guy: Fushimi, is this mixer alright? Omi: Yes! Thank you. Izumi: What did you buy, Chikage-san? Chikage: These. I bought some eye-catching items from a World Retort-Pouch Curry Fair. Izumi: Wow, amazing…! There are many types of curry! Chikage: This super spicy Kashmiri Curry looks delicious. Izumi: I’m interested in the Pakistan Curry here. Chikage: Would you want to eat them with me and compare their flavors later? Izumi: Really?! Yes, please! Omi: Ah, right. The sweets are ready, so you can take one if you want. There are some with less sweetness too. Kumon: The yogurt mouse cake is cool and tasty~! Azuma: A perfect refreshment in this hot season. Hisoka: Nom, nom… Omi: …Huh? Guy-san, there’s something else besides the mixer. Guy: Ah, that is… Kumon: A penguin pool bag! Izumi: Why did you get one? Guy: It was a raffle prize. I tried it to get a present for Mikage… Hisoka: …For me? Guy: Yes. I wanted to get you one because you often sleep hugging a penguin. Guy: To be honest, I was aiming for a cushion prize, but it was the top prize, and I couldn’t pull it. Guy: I’m thinking how to give it a good use. Hisoka: … Azuma: Fufu, you’re so nice, Guy. Kumon: This brings back memories! I used bags like this to go to the convenience store~. Hisoka: …Then, I will use it too. You pulled it for me, after all. Hisoka: I’m going to leave it in the bar to use when I go shopping. Guy: I see. It can be used as a reusable bag. That’s a good idea. Kumon: So Guy-san and Hisoka-san will use the penguin pool bag as a reusable bag…?! Azuma: That sounds adorable. Chikage: …How would it look for a grown man to use that outside? Omi: People could overlook it on those two, though. Izumi: I think I get what you mean…

[total-drama-takes-takes-2]

ttwt episode 4

“Last time, on Total Takes World Tour: Our pilot accidentally took a wrong turn and landed us in the vast ice sheet of Greenland, home of glaciers galore! After building their very own sleds, the three teams pushed it to the finish line, but only the Mojos won the challenge. Team Yaoi took their first fall and sent home the unlucky Joner, leaving a team full of enemies with nothing holding them together. Will someone finally snap and commit a crime? Will I ever get another hot chocolate refill? Find out now, on Total Takes: World Tour!”

“Mm, now that’s more like it,” Patrick yawns, lying face-down on the first class massage table while an attendant works on his back. “I deserve this.”

“For doing what, exactly?” Michela asks. 

Patrick lifts his head from the seat. “This team would be nothing without me,”

She rolls her eyes and sits back in her plush seat. Albert gives her a reassuring pat on the shoulder. 

---

Back in economy, Max balances his face in his palm and hunches over himself, blinking slowly. He looks exhausted, with heavy dark circles under his eyes. Beside him, Bonnie stretches and yawns, looking over their shoulder. 

“Woah, dude. Did you catch the plague?”

“I was up all night. I couldn’t sleep thinking about those two chumming it up in first class together,” he mumbles. 

Bonnie sighs. “Max, you need to get a grip. Do you trust Michela?”

“Of course I do,”

“Then you shouldn’t be losing sleep over it,”

Max frowns at her. “Okay, so, say, if a super cool, famous, good looking and much taller guy started flirting with Caesar, you’d just be cool with that?”

Bonnie hesitates. “It’s not… like that, with Caesar,”

“Really? So you wouldn’t be pissed off if he went out with someone else?”

“I mean… I guess, but, for different reasons,” 

Max rolls his eyes and goes back to blankly staring out the window. 

---

BONNIE: “Okay, since when did everyone and their pet hamsters decide they have any right to make decisions about my relationships? No one even bothered with me and Caesar until that stupid aftermath thing!”

---

“For the record, I think you and Caesar are so sweet,” Staci says, clapping her hands together. “You’re literally perfect for each other! How do you do it?”

Bonnie blinks. “Um… do what?”

“I mean, you guys are total opposites- how does it work? What makes it stick?”

“I don’t know- and we’re not total opposites,” Bonnie protests. “We have a lot in common.”

“SO cute,” Staci giggles. “I hope my future relationship is just like that!”

“Can we stop talking about this?” Phillip groans. “You liberals and your woke labelless relationships…”

Staci shrugs and turns back to Kelly, much to Bonnie’s relief.

---

BONNIE: “You know it’s bad when I’m agreeing with that guy,”

---

“Attention, campers! You better buckle up and hold on tight, cause we’re about to enter the Windy City!” Chris’ voice blasts over the intercom, feedback squealing. 

“The what?” Ass asks, but before anyone can answer, the plane begins shaking violently. 

The teens scream and hold onto each other for dear life as the cabin trembles once again, then smooths out as the plane descends. 

Courtney huffs. “You know, I’m starting to think they’re just doing that for fun,”

---

“Welcome to Chicago, Illinois!” Chris says, standing on the tarmac as the contestants file out of the plane. “Home of deep dish pizza and the Sears Tower, this city is known for being a top tourist destination- for everyone but you.” he chuckles. 

The teams look between each other nervously as Chris leads them to a boat on the banks of the Chicago River. 

"OMG, this is so my challenge. My dad is totally from Chicago," Staci says.

"Ooh, we're so winning!" Kelly says. The two squeal, and Max's eye twitches.

Chris smiles, stopping them in front of the water. “Your first stop- Riverwalk! This boat will take you to one end of the four-district public space, and from there you’ll make your way to Lake Michigan for your next challenge!”  

“This seems too easy. What’s the catch?” Julia asks. 

“Excellent point, Julia!” Chris beams. “In the New York episode of the original world tour, our contestants took baby strollers- and, as a fan of the classics, I think it’s only fair you kids do the same. But this time, one of you will get to push the stroller, while everyone else piles in.” 

The teams groan and board the boat. 

---

“This is the place. Okay, so who’s pushing?” Courtney asks. No one volunteers. “Come on, guys, we actually need to stick together to do this. We almost got Joner killed because we couldn’t work together!”

“So?” Mal asks, eyes trained on her phone. 

Courtney glares and storms over to her, grabbing her phone and throwing it in the river. Mal screams bloody murder. “MY CUSTOM COMMISSIONS WERE ON THERE! DO YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE THOSE ARE?!”

“Don’t know, don’t care. Now PUSH!”

None of the other teams are doing much better. 

“Sometimes, I wish Chris would assign these things,” Michela sighs. “Okay, who’s pushing?”

“You did a fine job being our dog last time,” Patrick shrugs. Michela glares. 

---

MICHELA: “You know, I am starting to get really fed up with that guy,”

---

“Okay, princess. I’ll push again. But if we lose, you’re my first vote,” she points directly in his face. He rolls his eyes. 

“Oh, please. Like anyone would choose you over me. They love me!”

Austin and Sha-Mod both cautiously shake their heads. Albert shivers. 

Nearby, Team Friendship sets off with Phillip pushing- though he’s not exactly doing a very good job at it. It’s like he’s trying to move a boulder up a hill. 

“You said you lift weights,” Bonnie grumbles. 

“I said sometimes!” Phillip says. “I just started! Besides, this is good for my gains.”

Max palms his forehead and Bonnie sighs. 

“Does anyone have any idea how long this thing is?” Mal asks, gently pushing the carriage along. “I’m boooooored.”

“Oh my God, you’re like a toddler!” Ass snaps.

Courtney smiles and pulls a set of keys out of their pocket, dangling them in front of Mal. Her eyes light up and she starts moving forward faster. “Oooh…”

Ass chuckles. “Nice one,” 

They and Courtney make fleeting eye contact and then quickly look away. 

“See? I told you we’d do well,” Patrick says as Michela outpaces Mal by a mile. 

“Oh, please. You guys weigh nothing,” she says. “It’s like I’m pushing a cart full of groceries.”

Julia watches Team Mojo pass them and shouts to the back of the carriage. “Can you jingle those things any faster?”

“Oh, relax,” Ass says. “Team Friendship is Magic is never gonna catch up to us.”

---

Sure enough, the group has only moved about a foot from the start line. Phillip is crying and panting like his life depends on it, trying to push the carriage with his entire body weight while Team Friendship is looking less than enthused. 

“Okay, I’ve had about enough,” Bonnie sighs, getting up. “Let me.”

“Uh-uh-uh!” Chris appears out of nowhere. “No tradesies, no takesy-backsies!”

They groan and sit back down, jostling the cart. Phillip cries in anguish. 

---

Team Mojo screeches to a halt at the mouth of the Lake, Michela panting heavily. Team Yaoi isn’t far behind, pulling up just as the former unloads and runs to the mouth of the lake, where Chris is waiting. 

“One, two… looks like we’re missing a team!” Chris chuckles. “Oh well! Welcome to the next part of your challenge. Chicago is known for many things- architecture, Irish-American pride, but most of all- meat-packing! That’s right, we’re standing in the American center of butchering, packing, and unions! That is, until abouuuut the 1920s.” he chuckles. “Your next challenge is focused around one of the many abandoned factories, where we’ve set up a replica of a classic meatpacking block.”

Albert goes pale. “Um… guys, I don’t think I can do this. I’m vegan,”

“Oh, please. Who’s afraid of getting a little bloody?” Patrick chuckles. 

Behind the Mojos, Team Friendship finally arrives, Phillip looking like he was wrung out and left to dry in the sun. He collapses as the teens begin unboarding, and Staci picks him up and slings him over their shoulder like he’s made of paper. 

“See you all in the former meatpacking district!” Chris shouts, setting off. 

--- 

“Guys,” Albert shakes nervously. “I can’t do this. I’ll be sick.”

“Luckily for you, there were no government regulations about what goes into industrial meat packing back in the day,” Chris chuckles. “Vomit, metal, fingers… Those machines weren’t FDA approved, after all!”

The teens look between each other nervously. 

“Your job is to pack as much meat as possible- when the timer runs out, you’ll embark on your final leg of the race to Cloud Gate,”

“You mean the Bean?” Staci asks. 

“No,” Chris glares. “It’s called Cloud Gate.”

Max crosses his arms with a smirk. “He means the Bean,”

Chris grumbles to himself and storms off as the sound of loud metal grating forces everyone’s attention to the conveyor belts and large machines surrounding them. From behind a sectioned-off room, the conveyor belt begins carrying pink lumps of mush. 

Albert is a sickly shade of green. “I can’t do this,”

“Hey, you got this,” Michela puts a hand on his shoulder. “Just pretend it’s… pink tofu.”

He takes a deep breath, then smiles and nods. From across the room, Max grits his teeth at the interaction. Bonnie rolls their eyes. 

“Does anyone have any idea how to do this?” Mal asks, sitting at a tinning machine near the end of their line. 

“You’ll figure it out. And if you don't, what’s a lost finger to you? You can still type with nine,” Ass says. 

Courtney giggles and turns back to organizing the tin cans. 

The faint sound of a ringing bell catches everyone’s attention. “Oh, brother,” Bonnie murmurs. 

“Song time, my industrial stars!” Chris’ voice blares from the observation room above. “Singing makes the work go by faster!”

Mal rolls her eyes. “What’s there not to love about The Windy City?”

Courtney joins in, and the song continues down the conveyor line. “The trains are colorful, the lines are pretty!”

“The crime is high, the river’s dyed!” Ass sings along. 

All three jump in. “What’s not to love about Chicago?”

“The lights are brighter, the fun is funner!” Sha-Mod sings. “The Italians are beefier, the bums are bummer!”

Austin skips along, shoving pink slop into a can. “The violence and crime make every alley shine!”

Albert picks up the verse shakily. “What’s not to love about Chicago?”

“The museums and the art, where sculptures are the stars,” Max goes on. “Even though there’s no such thing as spriiiiing!” 

“Meat break!” Sha-Mod says, tossing a handful of pink in the air. It sticks to the ceiling. 

“For the love of veganism, STOP!” Albert says before a chunk gets on his hand and he passes out. 

“Millennium Park and the hustle-bustle,” Julia sings. 

Bonnie picks up. “Hot dogs while the mobsters tussle!”

“And Cubs brands for all us Cubs fans!” Staci squeals. “What’s not to love…”

Kelly and Patrick jump in. “What’s not to love…”

“What’s not to looooove about Chicago!” the teens finish off. 

The loud metal screeching picks up and the conveyor belts come to a stop. Albert groans a small “Thank God,” from the ground. 

“Let’s see, let’s see, let’s see!” Chris comes out of the observation room wearing a vintage suit and swinging around a cane. He approaches the ends of each conveyor belt and studies the tinned meat. “I can tell you who’s not winning.” he chuckles, jabbing at Team Mojo’s measly pile of cans. “Looks like Team Yaoi has finally pulled it together!”

The four cheer enthusiastically and clap their hands. 

“You four will be getting a five minute head start on your foot race to the Cloud Gate,” Chris says. “NOT THE BEAN! The first team to arrive wins the challenge. Readyyyyyy? Go!”

Team Yaoi sets off first, dashing out of the factory and leaving the remaining teams behind. Michela helps Albert off the floor as Patrick grumbles to himself about carrying the team again. 

On the other side of the room, Max sits on the ground, joined by Bonnie, as Kelly and Staci start yapping again. 

“Hey,” Bonnie says, turning to Max. “I’ve been thinking about what you said, and I wanted to say… you’re right. I get where you’re coming from. Maybe you two should talk about it.”

He sighs. “I know. I won’t, though, I’m just overthinking. I don’t want to start a fight over nothing,”

“What makes you so sure it’d be a fight?”

“Experience,” he murmurs. 

Phillip strides over and sits between them. “What’re we talking about?”

“Nothing,” Bonnie and Max say in unison. 

“Oh, okay. Cool. Does anyone want to read my poetry?”

Bonnie and Max both stand and walk in opposite directions, away from Phillip. He sulks. 

Nearby, Kelly and Staci are gossiping loudly, the latter not bothering to watch her volume as she goes on about her personal life. 

“I mean, I’ve been thinking about it, and I had this revelation,” Staci says, flexing her wrists. “We can do study dates! I mean, she’s a STEM major like me, so the extra practice couldn’t hurt. And we get to spend time together! It’s a win-win!”

Kelly nods along, smiling, but soon turns away and stares off into the distance. 

---

KELLY: “I guess… I don’t know. I used to think having a big heart, being a hopeless romantic was a good thing, but it just makes me feel more alone than ever,” they sigh. 

---

Chris stands in the doorway, tapping his watch. “Five, four, three, two… and one! Get mov-” the teams barrel past him, knocking him onto the ground. “OW!”

---

Team Yaoi navigates the city, looking between them. “Screw a head start, I would’ve preferred a damn map!” Ass sighs, exasperated. “Does anyone have any idea where we are?”

Julia shrugs. “Chicago?”

“Very helpful, thank you!”

“You know what would be helpful right now? Google Maps! Let me just pull out my phone and we can find where the Bean is- oh, right! Some WITCH destroyed it!” Mal screeches. 

Courtney rolls their eyes and pulls out their keys again, jingling them. Mal’s pupils dilate and she stares, transfixed. “Okay, now what?” they ask. 

“Look!” Julia points. 

Down the street, Team Friendship dashes by, led by Staci. The Yaois turn to each other. “Follow them?” Courtney suggests. 

Ass shrugs. “I don’t see why not,”

And with that, they set off. 

---

“There it is! The finish line!” Staci points ahead, the large silver Bean coming into view.

“Mojos on your right!” Bonnie yells. “And Yaois on our left!”

The three teams are neck-in-neck, running alongside each other on other sides of the same street. “Hurry!” Max shouts. 

As the teams get closer and closer to the finish line, each fighting for victory, they make fleeting eye contact with each other- Staci glares at Ass, who glares at Max, who glares at Albert. 

Just mere inches from the Bean, Staci shouts: “JUMP!”

The two other teams follow suit, everyone jumping. A cloud of dust kicks up, obscuring the finish line. Chris’ eyes widen. “And the winner is… is…”

The dust clears, revealing Courtney’s arm has just passed the painted checkers. “The Yaois have won the challenge!”

The respective team weakly cheers. 

“Who loses?” Patrick demands, pointing accusingly at Chris. 

“No one does, silly. This is a non-elimination award challenge!”

The two losing teams breathe a collective sigh of relief, while the Yaois boo. “And for you winners, here’s your prize: a gourmet deep dish pizza dinner, finished off with dessert from Portillo’s Cake Shake!” 

The Yaois cheer and Staci sighs longingly. 

---

The winning team feasts in the galley together, enjoying their meal within sight- and smell- of the other teams, who are munching on gruel. 

“Well, this blows,” Michela sighs. 

“I don’t think I could handle another loss,” Max adds on. “I might start tearing out my hair and banging my head against the wall.”

Michela laughs, then smiles. “I’ve missed that,”

Max smiles back. “I’ve missed you, too,”

Bonnie watches from afar and gives a thumbs up. Staci aws, prompting an eye roll and a grunt of annoyance from the goth. 

“How’re you feeling, man?” Sha-Mod asks as Albert pokes at his gruel. 

“Sick,”

He shakes his head sadly, the Lightning picture taking on a sad expression. Patrick rolls his eyes. 

---

PATRICK: “Another day, another challenge passed thanks to yours truly,” he sighs. “Honestly, I don’t know where they’d be without me. But I do know that I’m carrying this team- and if they want to keep winning, they’re going to have to fall in line.”

[1d1195]

This is how I would imagine the plots:

• Too many beds

You show up at a hotel, but something happened a few days before you were booked there (like a flood or something), and they opened earlier than expected so there’s basically an entire hotel to choose rooms from. But you get super nervous and end up at completely opposite ends🤣

• Accidentally kidnapping a mafia boss

You and your friends fake kidnap another friend for a surprise birthday party, but he looks a lot like Harry and it’s a wrong place/wrong time situation and you can’t figure out what to do from there.

• Really nice guy who hates only you

He’d hate you for something super little and weird. Like your necklace link always slips down and it bugs him.

• Academic rivals except it's two teachers who compete to have the best class

It starts with a student transferring from one of their classes to the others (purely for a better schedule) and it starts a “Well they transferred because they think I’m more fun and an easier grader!” “They like the way I teach material more!”

• Divorce of convenience

You’d both get bigger tax returns or better insurance lol but you’d still stay together and live together

• Too much communication

Anytime an outsider starts to tell a story about something they did with the other partner, you guys get annoyed because you already know and think it’s a waste of time😂

• True hate's kiss (only kissing your enemy can break a curse)

I think this would definitely be vamprry

• Dating your enemy's sibling

I mean… self explanatory. Revenge or just to piss them off

• Lovers to enemies

Just a really bad break up 😂

• Hate at first sight

Very similar to nice guy who only hates you. Absolutely for such a dumb reason

• Love triangle where the two love interests get together instead

It’s a very healthy and supportive group of friends who just want each other to be happy, so they don’t care who dates.

• Fake amnesia

It’s a test to see if he actually loves you 😂

• Soulmates who are fated to kill each other

Either mafiarry, vamprry, or even wolfrry. Maybe demonrry? I think mafiarry would be best though. Like a families-are-enemies type of trope, and the only way to become the boss is to take out someone from the other family.

• Strangers to enemies

You bump into each other at a bar and one of you spills the others drink after a really bad day lol

• Instead of fake dating, everyone is convinced that you aren't actually dating

Neither of your love languages are physical touch so you just kinda sit/stand near each other and show no physical affection. And you always fist bump 💀

• Too hot to cuddle

He keeps his house super warm for some reason 😂

• Love interest CEO is a himbo/bimbo who runs their company into the ground

Inherited the company but went to school for something completely unrelated and just has no clue what the company even does. Sits in meetings like “I completely agree. And what do you think about it?” Because they’re just so unaware lol

• Nursing home au

Both of you are looking for a rich partner that will put you in their will, but you’re both hiding the fact that not only are you both doing it, but also faking how wealthy you are because you don’t want them to see you as the gold digger you are 🤣

And by “you” I mean Y/N. Not you bestie♥️

LONG AS HELL IM SO SORRY ILY

-👩🏻‍🔬

No I love it! Thank you for sending it! There are some hilarious and really cool ideas in here! You should write some of them!!! Divorce of convenience sent me. So did the one about the fist bump 😂 I think I would be terrible at writing some of these but you have really unique ideas for them and they sound so fun!

The nursing home one sounds like it would be hysterical and extremely fun to write!

Thanks for sharing all your ideas! 💕

xoxo

[hakugreenfinch]

The piss tea defense post (yes really)

Aight you know I’m serious when I use proper capitals and punctuation so let’s go!

So it’s a very widely memed part of Vento Aureo that Abbacchio seems to not like Giorno very much despite Giorno never doing anything to deserve it and I do believe I managed to decipher exactly what made him so hostile towards this random teenager that did seemingly nothing wrong!

The short answer: Abbacchio set up a vibe check and Giorno failed it.

The long answer:

Okay I’ll try to not make this too messy so let’s go through the scene first!

Giorno introduces himself, nobody really seems to have a very deep first impression of him, Abbacchio included.

He’s not even really being mean or anything when serving the uh, tea. I would say he’s more neutral than anything? Sure he teases Giorno about it but so does Mista, they’re doing this not out of malice but as a sort of joke.

We can tell from the others’ faces that they know exactly what is going on (minus Buccellati), so it’s safe to assume they have been through this same ritual. What does strike me as odd is their reactions to Giorno seemingly emptying his cup in a single sip, trying to guess if he actually drank it or used a trick or Gold Experience to avoid getting, well, piss in his mouth.

If this has happened before, if they have all been served Abbacchio’s special tea then why are they so shocked when Giorno seemingly passes what looks like a test of courage and guts? And why does it make Abbacchio not trust him because we only see him refusing to trust Giorno after this one point?

It’s not a test of courage, it’s a literal rite of passage, on the less serious and more teenage-boys-doing-weird-shit side.

See, there’s this book I love a lot. A girl goes to a new school and on her first day, she gets tangled up in a class game of “marrying” portraits of historical figures and such and her assigned “husband” is an empty fish tank. She gets mad, ruins the game, gets the class in trouble and for a big part of the story she’s treated as an outcast for not playing along. Though the comparison is not the best, I think the whole tea ritual is a very similar game Abbacchio plays to see what his teammates are made of. Sort of like when an unnamed BL game character explains he makes friends by beating people up because nothing will stand between you once you’ve seen each other at your worst!

But what could happen if you’re served a cup of steaming hot pee? You realize you’re being played and get mad about it, you try to drink it anyway because these cool guys are telling you if you refuse you can’t be their friend (Mista even speculates playfully that maybe Giorno doesn’t want to drink because he doesn’t really want to be one of them) and make a mess and embarrass yourself in public or you don’t even realize what’s in the cup and you make a mess and embarrass yourself in public. Mean as it sounds (and well, I’m not saying it is a super nice and innocent thing for Abbacchio to do but that’s just how he is), it does very much seem to be a test of “are you willing to give up your pride and dignity and just have fun with us” to me. If you refuse to partake in this little game obviously you’re a killjoy but if you’re willing to play along and put your pride away you’re cool and in the gang.

And this is where the part that pissed Abbacchio off comes in! By using Gold Experience to trick everyone into thinking he actually drank the tea, Giorno refused to play by these rules and established a sort of dominance. Abbacchio doesn’t like that! Why did he refuse to be a silly goofy boy? Why did he have to make it about a power play? Why isn’t he willing to break down his false image of a badass cool guy and open up to these other kids who also at some point likely humiliated themselves in this way?

It’s not even just Abbacchio’s pride being hurt either. If you put yourself in his place it is weird and offputting that Giorno realizes what’s going on and refuses to go along with his stupid prank. If you look closely, throughout the show Giorno doesn’t really befriend the gang in the sense that I cannot recall a single scene where something silly is going on and he joins the fun or even talks to anyone about something that isn’t related to his mission at hand. While yes, making others drink your pee is weird and gross, obviously, it did lead Abbacchio to pick up on Giorno not really trying to be a team member like anyone else in the gang and even though we know Giorno is not a manipulative villain, Abbacchio doesn’t know that. All he sees is a kid not playing by his rules and it leads him to the conclusion that something is off about him and, well, even if his distrust towards Giorno isn’t really justified based on what we know about him, it makes sense if you consider what Abbacchio does and doesn’t know.

So, he set up a vibe check to see how fun his new team members are and by tricking his way out of having to look like a clown, Giorno failed that vibe check.

[trulyinspiringmovies]

Super Mario Bros.

“Super Mario Bros.” looked like a movie that would be fun to make fun of, but ended up being extremely difficult to sit through.

Mario Mario and his brother, Luigi Mario, are plumbers working in Brooklyn. Luigi starts dating a girl named Daisy. When Daisy gets kidnapped and transported into another dimension, Mario and Luigi jump in to rescue her. Before Daisy disappeared, Luigi was able to procure her necklace. The Mario Brothers come to realize that the necklace is an ancient meteorite that caused the extinction of the dinosaurs in their reality. Placed in the wrong hands, the meteorite can be used to fuse the two realities back together.

I remember watching this movie when I was in middle school and thinking it wasn’t the best, but it was cool to see such a different take on the Mario Brothers. This was back when I thought turning every IP into something gritty was cool. Now that I’m older, I don’t really subscribe to the belief. I think some properties benefit from a more gritty take, but most don’t. A prime example is the Mario Brothers. People like their world because it’s vibrant and fun. “Super Mario Bros.” takes all of that and throws it out the trash. This universe is a seedy underbelly, almost like a dystopia. It’s constantly dark and people don’t know how to use their car brakes. I don’t mind Mario having a Brooklyn accent, but I will never understand why they chose John Leguizamo to play Luigi. I think he’s fine, despite the fact that I don’t like him in a lot of movies, but the age gap between him and Bob Hoskins makes their being brothers implausible. I think Bob Hoskins was fine as Mario, but I don’t think he’s a mascot that kids could get behind. There were a bunch of mind-baffling changes made from the source materials that just do not work. Goombas are known to be smaller creatures, but they’re hulking beasts in this movie. Yoshi looks like a generic dinosaur. They never refer to King Koopa as Bowser. King Koopa also just looks like a normal human until the very end when he turns into a generic, cheap-looking dinosaur. What pisses me off the most was what I learned about after I rewatched the movie. I always love hearing about actors enjoying their time on set and how the director fosters a positive environment while filming. I genuinely think this produces a better performance overall. Reading about the sheer incompetence of Rocky Morton and Annabel Jankel made my blood boil. You know it’s bad when a majority of the cast had to be under the influence of whatever they could get their hands on in order to get through production. Bob Hoskins would even talk badly about the director a couple of years later, even after they resigned from directing entirely. Dennis Hopper, the guy who played King Koopa, reportedly got so fed up that he yelled at the director for three hours straight. There’s even a story about how Rocky Morton poured hot coffee on one of the extras because he didn’t like them. Then, he later tried to deny this by saying he was only trying to make the extra’s costume look more weathered. This is the behavior of a trash human being. I normally don’t condone letting personal gripes be leveled in a professional setting, but I think this is the rare occasion where it’s warranted. I’m glad these two aren’t directing movies anymore. They don’t deserve to. They’re not only incompetent, but they’re also calloused, evil people whose legacy will be this stain on cinematic history.

★

Rewatched on April 7th, 2023

[mermaidsirennikita]

Love and light to Bridget but idk how she puts up with Valentine in Duke of Sin lol - he’s like an angry little Pomeranian. I love how Val is short. He absolutely would be and I don’t think it bothers him a bit (I always picture Eve as taller than him/the taller sibling). And lmao to when Bridget is forced to go “well turns out he wasn’t lying about his *personal attributes*” in that nude painting of him. Like, Elizabeth Hoyt!!! Your brain!!!

Side note/question - if you had to FMK the Maiden Lane heros, how would you categorize them?

Honestly, I think Bridget has a lot of kinks that the text would probably deal with more if it was published today. There's some shit going on with her. In a lot of ways, I see Val/Bridget as a contrast to Maximus/Artemis, wherein you have a wacky duke paired with what appears to be an imminently sensible and calm woman, but there are key differences in that:

A) Maximus, while clearly being insane, is more of a general ass re: his relationship with Artemis, while Val is COMPLETELY off his rocker, and demonstrates this to Bridget.

B) I'll be super real... taste is taste and this is TOTALLY PERSONAL, but Maximus sounds a lot hotter on a purely physical level to meeeeeee. Jacked severe duke with some salt and pepper going on > super pretty duke. Val is hot because of who he is/his insanity/the fact that we see him do sex things, but on the street I feel like I wouldn't be into him? And people in the text are like "he's very pretty but also SUPER WEIRD-PRESENTING". But GOOD FOR HIM.

C) Bridget has experience, Maximus is Artemis's one and only. While I do nOT see Artemis as a meek heroine at all (quiet, yes, meek no) it's kinda not a surprise that she'd fall in love with the rich hot duke who pops her cherry AND gives her multiple orgasms. Bridget.... should know better lmao.

So basically, Bridget REALLY loves Val, which means she's a bit twisted.

Re: FMK, I'd fuck em all because they all sound good in the sack, but I'd MARRY: Winter, Mickey, Maximus, and Asa.

A more accurate ranking would tier like this:

Tier 1: God Tier/Would Suck Him Off In A Public Venue

Winter Makepeace, Thief of Shadows--Obviously, I love Winter with all my wasted heart. He's not even as much of my usual romance hero type because he's nOT a rat bastard, but he's so wound up and stridently self-confident while at the same time possessing the heart of an absolute freak who wings it. I love an undone man, and he's so. undone. Also, how can one man be so cool and yet so deeply uncool at once? Like, he's Zorro but he also is basically cosplaying because some random guy showed him how to once. Also, he spends time being like "my God, am I just a lustful wretch" because he got a boner oNE TIME.

Charming Mickey O'Connor, Scandalous Desires--Mickey is probably like. The sexiest Maiden Lane hero. He is a river pirate who somehow gets away with saying things like "you're me lady now" on the force of sheer sex appeal. I imagine him wearing leather pants and a flowy pirate shirt that's open to his navel all the time. Don't ruin that for me. He's also deeply weird, as any hero of my heart is. 10/10 would let him lick my tears off my face.

Maximus Batten, Duke of Midnight--Lots of people hate Maximus. They are wrong. Is Maximus a total asshole? Yes. Is the main obstacle to Maximus getting everything he wants, in fact, Maximus? For sure, no doubt. Is it truly bizarre that he's like, fucking the shit out of this woman, clearly in love with her, and then being like "sadly, we cannot be together, because I find you embarrassing". Oh yes. But that is... why.... I love him? I love Maximus because he's his own worst enemy. Because he has the whole "TAKE MY COME BECAUSE I CAN GIVE YOU NOTHING ELSE" (not true lmao) line. Because he honestly fucks like a champ and is then like "oh my god Alfred, (Craven), look away, Diana's (Artemis's) tits are out". Because of that scene where he just sat down before Artemis and dragged her forward and ate her out like she was breakfast, lunch, AND dinner. Because... he's such an idiot. 100+ "he called his heroine by not her actual name first" points.

Asa Makepeace, Sweetest Scoundrel--Asa is iconic to me because he mixes filth and sweetness so well? Like, he's not as decent as Winter. He's kind of a trashbag himbo who puts on this big rakish show. But he's..... incredibly sweet with Eve. Like. So tender. So understanding. I don't respond well to "we fall in love while he comforts me about my sexual trauma" romances often, because it can often feel... exploitative, somehow? But this one nailed it, and while Eve is an amazing heroine, I think it's in part too because of how Asa is like... not a perfect guy, but a guy with a deeply good heart deep down. Which makes sense, because he comes from a family that has some of the most deeply decent people (Winter and Silence) in the series. Also, on a shallow note, that scene where he jacks off in the carriage is A LOT.

Tier 2.1: Iconic, But I Have Questions

Valentine Napier, Duke of Sin--Yes, Val is hot, he is iconic, I see why everyone loves him, I don't take anything at all away from that. But does he sometimes veer in a direction where I'm like "oh he can plow, but in the cool light of day I'd wonder some things about his fashion choices"? Sure. I am not. A HUGE fan of all his frothy lace. Elizabeth Hoyt will sell me on basically every hero. The Serpent Prince is another one where I was like, "oh! He has jeweled buckles on his high heeled shoes and he is battling!" Sometimes, the heroes just feel extra Georgian, and this is one of those times for me. I also, as someone with two cats who are basically parasitic creatures attached to me, do struggle sometimes with the cat murders.

Tier 2.2: Time to Call My Shrink About the Daddy Issues

Godric St. John, Lord of Darkness--Initially, I don't think I ranked this book that high in the series. But upon re-reads of... certain passages, I am more into Godric than I once was. I mean, he's hot. He's deeply daddy. He's like, one of the more normal Maiden Lane heroes, for sure. I actually own this book in paperback and need to do a complete re-read. I find Godric to be unfortunately placed between two of my favorite heroes, so it's hard to like... hold him up against Winter and Maximus. But he's objectively so hot.

Captain James Trevillion, Dearest Rogue--OOOOOOOH HOT. It's only recently that I realized that he's Georgian Jim Gordon, which, weird. But man. When he dry humped that girl he was supposed to be taking care of, who's a lil YOUNG FOR HIM BUT NOT IN A WEIRD WAY, who's his CHARGE!!! And then felt DIRTY BAD WRONG ABOUT IT??? Oh, that's hot. Also, I love that he's like. Wounded and fucked up about it. Yes sir, tell me all about all your SELF LOATHING. I liked his farm family less though.

Hugh Fitzroy, Duke of Kyle, Duke of Pleasure--How fun is it that this guy is a king's bastard? So fun. Also fun: that iconic scene where he's like "Alf, pretend to suck my dick so everyone moves past us and ignores our espionage" and she just. Sucks his dick for real. And then he's like, "Alf legit they're gone" and she's like "I'm gonna do anyway" and he comes in her mouth? And then he's like "Jesus Christ bitch" and mAKES HER SPIT INTO HIS NICE HANDKERCHIEF??? Anyway, I don't love the CSI: Maiden Lane arc because it's so dark, but that scene, man. I also am a sucker for any time a hero has a Shang From Mulan moment where the heroine is dressed like a man and he's like "you know what.... for that twink... I would..."

Tier 2.3 Yeah My Man's A Slut

Griffing Remington, Notorious Pleasures--I really have nothing to complain about here. Griffin's book is kind of an outlier in that it's like... more Maiden Lane than the previous book, but still not quite there, but it's very good and fun. (To me, Scandalous Desires is when Elizabeth Hoyt REEEEEALLY hits her stride.) He's a hot fuck who isn't above boning his brother's fiancee, and I respect the hell out of that. A true slut. I believe he's amazing in bed.

Tier 2.4 Well Now I'm Sad (But We Love Him)

Raphael de Chartres, Duke of Desire--His story is so well done and I love him and he's a great hero, but his book is VERY, VERY sad. His backstory is crushing. I'd recommend this book (with the necessary TWs) and I'm sure I'll reread it, but it's not an easy read and though I found his love story romantic and cathartic, it was darker than Sweetest Scoundrel due to its proximity to ongoing issues, and... yeah. Hard. But I love him.

Tier 2.5 Further Evaluation Needed

Lazarus "Caire" Huntington, Wicked Intentions--Yeah so I don't recall much of this one and I need to do a full reread, but Caire is hot and all, despite his weird hair. I find him to be less in line with most Maiden Lane heroes, but that makes sense because he's the first one. Would bang, but need to brush up on everything.

Apollo Greaves, Darling Beast--I know this book is great, but I also read it at a bad mental health time so I need to re-read it. Apollo is a biiiig guy, which I love. He's also got a very difficult backstory, like Raphael, but not *quite* as intense. I remember him being REAL GOOD AT SEX, I just need to reread his entire story.