#do you think maybe that sounds familiar ???
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i was at my therapist's not too long ago, drew these on the whiteboard while on the waiting list ☺️🩷
#i was supposed to ask my friend if i should erase it or not but my message wouldnt send in time so i couldn't reach him#i ended up erasing it and when i got out of the office he was like 'NOOO YOU COULDVE MET ANOTHER DANGANBRO'#looking back at it i think i could have since my therapist mentioned that the game sounded familiar#well as far as the title goes anyway#he also suggested that to help me with my schoolwork he could hypnotize me so i'd get like#some sorta 'oh ok so i have to do x task' response if i see something specific#which...#maybe#just maybe#i should get a monokuma plush for that#anyway thats for my tag ramble#danganronpa: goodbye despair#dr2 goodbye despair#danganronpa 2#danganronpa#danganronpa nagito#nagito komaeda#danganronpa komaeda#danganronpa hajime#hajime hinata#aiden.png
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Just wanted to say that your characters feel like real people in the best possible way! I really enjoy reading the snippets of lore you post about them.
(and also, your art style is beautiful - it's extremely recognizable, unique, and makes the graphic designer part of my brain very very happy)
That's so nice to hear, thank you!
#maybe this sounds weird but#when you reach a certain level of familiarity with a character you've created it almost starts to feel like they're a person you know#and whose comings and goings you're just documenting for some reason#it's like#when they get enough momentum it requires a lot less active planning on your part to figure out what they would do and how they would think#you just know#does that make sense?#also thank you I'm glad you find my style recognizable and unique!#answered#chelerin
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Knightfall in Dream Land - Page 4
Meta Knight shares what it was like to grow up being raised by Nightmare.
#Kirby#Kirby fanart#my art#comic#Meta Knight#Nightmare#sorry this page took me so long to finish I’ve been really busy with grad school stuff and was at a conference last month#but it’s finally here and page five shouldn’t take me as long to finish as this page did#the comic is mostly centered around the game lore and not the anime lore but I did borrow a little bit from the anime#this might be a dumb question but do any other Kirby fans have voice headcanons for the characters?#by voice headcanons I mean what do you think they’d sound like if they had voiced dialogue#for Meta Knight and Dedede I think they’d just sound like they do in the anime since those voices are so iconic lol#I know that Nightmare also speaks in the anime but I don’t really like his anime voice#I’m showing that I’m a Trekkie with this lmao but my voice headcanon for Nightmare is that he’d sound like Ricardo Montalban#Montalban died in 2009 but he was famous for playing Khan in Star Trek he was so good in that villain role#but that was in the 1960s and 1980s so if you aren’t a Star Trek fan you might not be familiar with him#he also plays the grandpa in Spy Kids though and I think he was also in Kim Possible#I actually see a lot of parallels between Kirby and Star Trek lol but maybe that’s just me and no one else sees it#I’m developing an idea for a Susie redemption arc comic that I want to draw when I finish Knightfall in Dream Land#and if I do eventually draw it it’s going to be very heavily influenced by Star Trek/there will be lots of Star Trek references in it#Planet Robobot as a game basically is just a Star Trek episode lmao it has the same plot as every Borg episode from Star Trek#so I think referencing Star Trek in a comic centered around Susie would make sense#Knightfall in Dream Land
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artemis in pseudo death
#artemis is dead AND alive to me#hear me out#i don't think you're the only traveller who's met artemis in-universe#artemis could be a recurring pattern that has appeared in many different traveller iterations#maybe not in EVERY iteration but i believe a good portion has still met them#by extension perhaps apollo and null too. then they could also be seen as recurring patterns#but they might not come in the same package with artemis. call them free goodies you never know when you'll get them#but there's a very real chance.#if a traveller meets artemis it's not guaranteed that they'll go through the usual procedure of the artemis questline#like they could ditch artemis (or die) halfway through or they simply choose to ignore them alltogether#do keep in mind we're talking IN-UNIVERSE here. gameplay mechanics like respawning are thrown out of the window#now here's my main point (HUGE SPOILERS)#the travellers who have to make THE choice can't all be going for the same choice#so there's going to be plenty of dead artemises and artemises who are alive in the simulation#we're talking about this on a multiversal scale#and the artemis up to the point before the choice is pseudo dead. or pseudo alive if you will because it's like a 50/50 thing#artemis has 3 states: dead. alive and pseudo dead/alive#this all sounds very familiar doesn't it? schrodinger's cat moment#they're not exactly the same but they're damn close enough to me#if artemis really is a recurring pattern in different traveller iterations then artemis has probably met more travellers than anyone else#only beaten by nada and polo#artemis would have realized their dream but in an extreme way. they're meeting other travellers on a multiversal scale#nms artemis#no man's sky#shit just realized there's another thing to expand on but i'm too tired by now. it's gonna have to go in an analysis if it ever comes out
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everytime I think even just a little bit that I'm starting to sort of get better at speaking aloud, somebody will say something horrible to me about my voice and ruin everything
#im so glad i don't have to speak aloud on yhe internet. i will only ever share my voice with internet people that are extremely accepting#but in real life i have no choice but to speak aloud and it is desroying me. im trying so hard to get better at speaking#i have gotten better in some areas. my pronunciation of words is better than when i was a kid i think!#thr only words i think i mispronounce often are actually sort of simple ones like 'the' or 'that'#the one thing ill never ever be able to get rid of is the stuttering#and ill never be able to change that i just . sound autistic i guess?#i dunno i get called retarded for my voice but also. i get retarded for everything i do#thank you classmates. i am going to kill myself#is anybody out there reading this? if you are are you familiar with any ways to get rid of stuttering#i have stuttered for my whole life#and i get made fun of it all the time#but when i ask how to stop nobody ever helps me#ive tried so hard to stop!! i dont wanna stutter#and also i think just the way my voice sounds and the volume which i speak at is part of the problem#again those are things i don't know how to change . i don't know#im never gonna have a voice im comfortable with huh#why am i lying in bed abd typing a tumblr vent post again im so sick of this#maybe i should just stop speaking at all#im only going to communicate through meows now#meow meow meow. meow#i can't stop thinking about my voice and how much i hate it and how much everyone else hates it. bleh#throat hurts for some reason but i dunno why#i thinj im going to avoid speaking aloud from now on because its not worth the pain#life sucks#so much. so fucking much
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realized recently all the wizard ocs i have made fall into 4 categories of motivation
autism
ocd
wanting to use magic to kill people, just to be mean
inanna
#my ocs#so. i guess i should look more into ocd in order to be respectful about it#i didnt intend to include it originally but then when thinking abt characters like yiming where its like yeah hes constantly tormented#by obsessive thoughts about how he could be doing better and is usually miserable as a result#i was like this sounds kind of familiar yk. i dont want to exaggerate it or use it for angst or anything like that bc it feels extremely#tasteless lol#also dont want to portray moral ocd as like a positive productive force for obvious reasons#anyway it is kind of funny to me like what the fuck is wrong with jaime. joanna is the other person in the evil category but she was like#a prodigy with insane skill and the rest of her character stems from there#whereas jaime's character is pretty much just abusive murderous asshole. did he just believe in his own superiority that much#cant stress enough how it is very very difficult to do magic. idk maybe he was like cursed#as a child and so had familiarity with magic from a young age. to an unusual extent yk#sure whatever ig that makes sense. zeolans shield backstory written here for you all live#ok also autism category is rocio and malachi#ocd category is shamash yiming and rocio again#evil category is jaime and joanna#inanna category is inanna#angelica should also be in the inanna category tbh. i have never drawn her she died many years before the story started. shes low on the#lore iceberg lol#should rename the category to girl who is cool and swag
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Tentative idea doodles for some Rooks!
Illaryen von Bioware-pls-reveal-the-faction-surnames (they/them). Mourn Watch, mage, elf, in their 40s. If Mourn Watch elves have the option of having a Dalish background, I am considering going so on the nose that there's danger of a nosebleed and choose Falon'din vallaslin for them.
Personality-wise I want to press the sad clown trickster with emotional intimacy issues button so hard that Varric constantly looks over at them with something wistful and heavy in his eyes like '...y'know you remind me a lot of my best friend as a young man' (purple hawke you will always be famous), except with an added air of 'what if the sartorial choice of wearing a half-cape was a person'. Genuinely intellectually interested in everything Solas is doing and what it means for the understanding of magic overall, but doesn't agree with it, at least at the outset. Get ready for rigorous intellectual debates Wolf Boy, you'll be married to it for a while
Name pending (he/him). Shadow Dragon, warrior, dwarf, late 20s/early 30s. Just a really nice, very strong lad with high ideals and the desperate hope that a positive attitude can make up for lack of experience or understanding much of anything that's going on around him (Fade... what??? what kind of capital v Veil now???). Dwarves seem to do pretty ok in Tevinter all told, so if the backstories allow it I think a sort of defector from decadence vibe might be fun for him -- I imagine he's from a warrior caste family who have historically done pretty well in Provings and is now the family black sheep, having known the sky (shudders in traditional dwarf). Very much part of the 'we can fix him!' crowd in regards to Solas, quite possibly to a fault.
--
(I don't have romances planned out for either of them -- I need to see more of the companions and suss out their romantic vibes before I can make any decision about that!)
#illaryen entered my mind hair-first I just saw a haircut and a slight silhouette and I somehow knew... 'oh there they are'#also these two are on complete opposite sides of the 'comfort and familiarity with magic' spectrum haha#one of them a blasé 'oh yes the fundamental structure underlying all of reality we've all seen it' and the other a panicked 'what the FUCK'#being completely lost at sea about magic and incredibly stressed about it was one of my fave parts of playing my cadash#I think I could bring it back for another round of 'wtf do you mean this is where you guys go when you sleep???? hELLO?????'#return of the sounds fake but I don't know enough about your weird magic bullshit to dispute it#ooooh or this being tevinter maybe he's had friends who know all about magic and he's just been tuning out all their infodumps#good-naturedly jock style. he could just kick himself#many possibilities here much to think about#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#just to be safe#my art#rook
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i don’t think i’ve ever felt this lost in my life. tbh
#feeling sad? sure. hopeless? been there done that. anxious as hell? at least once a week. but lost? no. not really#and that’s really fucking scary because i’m not familiar with it and i just don’t know how to deal with it#i can’t stop thinking that i’m running out of time because i’m 25 and i don’t think i can afford feeling this way#taking a break from uni sounds good in theory but in reality? again. i’m 25. i need to at least achieve one thing in my life holy shit#it’s SO hard to see the good even when it’s right in front of me or someone points it out. like having a job or studying or getting to#travel or even just having friends ARE achievements but i always want More More and More i am addicted to wanting more cause it feels like#nothing i do is ever enough. and now i’m adding feeling lost because i’m finally acknowledging the fact that i don’t know what i want to do#with what i’m studying or how to get a different job in the future when i almost have no experience and everything is just so frustrating#because i simply don’t fucking know. i just don’t. i can’t afford not knowing!! everything is so messy rn you would think i’d be thriving#after seeing louis and meeting aria and traveling to germany and i am genuinely so happy those things happened but fuck man there is always#the Bigger Thing taking over and it makes me feel like an ungrateful brat i just don’t fucking know man. maybe i am an ungrateful brat#but it’s just so hard to be happy when you’re feeling so lost with everything in your life and yourself#anyway i just. needed to let that out#negative#effie talks to the moon
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i mean this in the least weird possible i promise but. i think that you get an extra layer of delight in reading tged and 약 파는 황태자 if you're used to consuming korean content. i'm not saying you're missing something important from them if you don't do this but,,,, i do think there are certain little details and humor that probably don't hit quite as much if you're not familiar with some of the culture and humor lol
it's just the little things, like lloyd calling javier "this punk" or "this guy" even while talking directly with him, because it feels sorta awkward in english, but if you're used to watching series or movies in korean you can almost hear the tone in which he's saying it.
or when javier is teasing lloyd and he hits too close at home and lloyd just goes "hey" but you can almost heart the "야" which is very close but not quite. or this little 'haah' he does when he's kind of frustrated or thinking hard about something.
or that you don't quite get why it's such a deal that julian started calling lloyd 'older brother' cause the translation doesn't use the word 'hyung'. or that the point of javier and lloyd's bet was that if lloyd lost he would call javier, someone younger than him, 'hyung' which would imply he's older and is a form of showing respect or affection. which is completely different from the 'master' they used in the translation. or how sweet and kind of sad it is that theodore still calls rakiel 'hyung' even when the whole court expects them to be against each other.
or just in general the way the dialogue flows feels much more natural when you consider that it was originally written in korean and not in english
it just,, small things that you don't quite notice unless you already have experience in dealing with a different language than the one you were raised with akjshdkja
#i talk a lot <3#i think people who are bilingual will get what i'm saying#it's not the same to read a translation when you don't know the original language as it is when you do know it#even if you don't quite speak it#there's just a certain tone to all languages#and you enjoy media a lot more when you consume it in it's original language#or are at the very least familiar with it#my native language is spanish and when i learned english i had to learn the way humor and tone and slang is used with it#because it's so much different than the humor and tone and slang we use in spanish and if you don't learn those things you're missing a big#chunk of the language itself#now my korean is basically non-existent i can tell you a few words and phrases and can maybe get the gist of a couple sentences#i would not be able to read an entire book in korean#but i'm familiar with the sounds and intonation of it so it's fun to see the way a sentence is written in korean#and being able to kinda tell how it would sound out loud#or i dunno maybe i'm just a nerd ajskdhjka
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Ep 9 ! :)
#I feel like I really got not much to say about this one.#The whole Kunikida deal with witnessing the child die has always left me ://#It's just always felt... Unnecessarily cruel to me. Wow the world is unforgiving and life is nothing but suffering. Okay#You know it does have to do with everything else I don't agree with about bsd's core morals. The nihilism and everything.#But like it is what it is I'm not dwelling much on it for the most part.#It's chapter 76 Teruko saying “In this world‚ being ‘desperate’ means relatively little. /So welcome to our world./”#I'm just not used to believe there's such a thing as no-win scenarios. But I suppose that's naivety on my end#Btw‚ up to this moment‚ I've ALWAYS thought all the kids died in the explosion.#And I'm only now realizing it was only the little one with the granades on their neck? That doesn't make it any less horrible‚ but at least#to know the others survived is a relief.#(Btw how the hell did Kunikda survive?? He was literally running towards three granades. Or maybe I'm not familiar with weapons power idk?)#In a way this arc reminds me a lot of t/pn. The little kids with guns. The break out and break in. Idk.#What else. I like Tanizaki he's a funny character.#I wish we'd see more of Atsushi actually... Do things#I love. Love Kouyou's character and I think her relationship with Kyouka is so compelling.#In this episode I really like how Kyouka seemingly took advantage of Kouoyou's unwillingness to harm her and by extension Tanizaki.#It's very smart.#I like how much emphasis is put on Demon Snow and Golden Demons being... Really powerful abilities. It made me feel like another reason–#why Kouyou hasn't shown up for half manga now is a Chuuya-esque kind of being too powerful–#their existence would defeat any plot obstacle lol#Next episode! There's gonna be my favourite scene in the whole manga :)#random rambles#Almost forgot. When I say b/sd is racist...#It's not only that every single foreigner is by definition a villain.#It's Kunikida saying “He was born abroad‚ but he grew up here. It's not unusual here‚ in this crucible of ability user criminals.”#Which sounds pretty much like saying that everyone coming from abroad must automatically be a criminal. Which.#Yikes
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feeling nostalgic and watching utube reactors discover classic songs and then feeling both old and incredulous
#1980s music#like someone watching blondie's rapture and then stopping to go 'oh it reminds me of something it's so familiar'#different people (all younger) do this all the time and it can be infuriating#like it's an older song - did it ever occur to you that maybe what you're thinking of ... took inspiration from THIS song????#although in that case it was rather grandmaster flash and the nyc rap scene bc of course that's what the song was referencing#it's the boss baby meme but in music form#and i know i'm guikty of it too but at least in the correct direction - looking back to things that came before#not being aghast that a beat they've heard s thousand times was sampled from an old song that copied an older song lol#i will say that it is SO weird to me that peopke who say they are into hiphop never seem to reference the rap from my youth#like the late 70s and 80s sound that everything after is built on#and it's not like i know a lot about it beyond watching yo mtv raps at night lol#but i had to watch kids struggle to recognize the warren g regulate sample from michael mcdonald#like SO much of the early sampling era was just tons of samples of old records - anything they didn't have to pay for#and then listening to things and going oh this sounds like the weeknd - bro the weekend sounds like 80s songs#he sings and structures the songs in similar ways to classic tracks rather than the current trend (sometimes)#gah i'm just ranting here rather than in some poor utubers comments#i wish i had some fellow old folks to jabber with#but even when i was in high school i didn't have any friends that liked the same kind of music as i did#bts getting me more interested in music and watching videos has really been a double-edged sword sigh#everything with a live studio band with bass in it: 'oh this sounds like disco'#or worse something literally built off a disco sample and it's like they've never heard a disco song other than ymca in their life
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writing a trash twins fic because your actual irl sibling is driving you up the fucking wall
#ada speaks#it worked#i just know dennis and dee living together was disastrous but they had their moments of like. ok maybe i like you sometimes.#i want to kill my sibling more often than not because of the dumbest shit#youre fucking CLEANING YOUR ROOM while im overstimulated? die. every sound you make is irritating and i'm going to beat you to death#but also on good days where neither of them are irritated i'm sure they'd just be chilling#its about the routine and the familiarity#one of them gets up early and makes coffee for the three of them. like. eh its just an extra scoop or two#no big deal. its not like i was doing it for you.#(bet mac's making the coffee more often than den or dee though lmao)#i think it's in group dates where dennis and dee are sitting on the couch together and just talking while dennis is eating breakfast#just the thought of them grocery shopping together because dennis is tired of dee buying shit he doesn't like#like okay. we're getting fresh fruit and i am making my own fucking orange juice today.#mf drinks orange juice out of a glass bottle. that sure was a choice they (props) made for him.#anyway. holy shit tangent.
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i can't Not take your little "haha ew men" jokes to heart when 2 thirds of the people laughing along with you in the notes are terfs
bioessentialism is still shit even if it's for laughs/satirical/pwning the patriarchy or whatever your little excuse du jour is
#i am begging y'all to understand that the LGBTQ community isn't woman fem & non-binary only#''oh you must not care about women if you don't like anti-men jokes"#i can not even begin to explain to you how well my fist fits on your face#learn to cope with shit like a normal fucking person#''oh men have hurt me a lot so it's ok it's my trauma response''#ok. every single person who has caused me the most harm in life has been a woman. do you see me being a misogynist ?#your revenge mentality is getting you nowhere have a glass of juice and calm down#also no matter how many little 'but not trans guys ! i'm not saying that about transmascs !' disclaimers you half-heartedly throw around#you're still insinuating that people of my gender have no value and deserve no respect#do you think maybe that sounds familiar ???
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the green knight is the one of the first 'me and my partner saw you across the bar' scenarios, down to the fact that the hottie is sweatily experiencing existential dread as if they will die any second and the couple is like 'wellllllll if my wife kissed you then you have to kiss me because we share everything in this marriage ;)'
#like the lord would give gawain a shoulder massage and be like 'wow you feel reallly tense. honey maybe we should break out the wine?'#i don't mean this with disrespect to the couple in green knight its just that i do think it's extremely funny how it's actually like#oh this king arthur story sounds... really familiar#the green knight is the only arthur legend i know so i will comment on it at length
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nsfw, mdni.
simon becomes an absolute dog when he sees you in his shirt.
cw: possessive simon, sex on carpet (ouch), unprotected p in v, creampie, size kink (?).
simon is a good roommate. he’s organized, clean, pays rent on time, and minds his own space. the only thing is—roommate is hot. stupidly hot. you know he doesn’t have a girlfriend and he’s never once brought back a girl let alone mentioned one. you figured your little crush on him would pass like all the other (it does not). you start dropping hints that you find him attractive. like wearing your tightest tops, brushing your ass against him while reaching for a cup, even leaving one of your lacy thongs to mix in with his laundry. he never bites the bait. you start to think that maybe he just doesn’t find you attractive or even worse he finds you creepy. so you tuck your schoolgirl crush away into the cavity of your chest.
you close the washer with your hip, cradling your laundry basket back to your room. you hear the familiar turn of your front door lock letting you know simon is home from his morning gym session.
you pad into the living room to ask simon if he needed any clothes washed. simons back is turned from you when he begins to slip off his trainers, dropping his gym at the foot of the door.
“need any clothes washed? i’m starting a load up right now.” you ask eyeing the movement of back muscle underneath his compression shirt.
he finally turns to you and starts to respond “nah don’t think-“ before he snaps his mouth shut when he sees what you’re wearing. “that mine?” his voice gruff, it’s his army issued shirt that is long enough to cover your shorts. a deep green color that frays at the hem and has his last name in bold at the back of it. you notice he’s staring at the worn fabric waiting for an answer.
you look down, “oh yeah. sorry was doing laundry found this in hamper. my clothes are in the wash. hope that’s okay?” you sound apologetic like you just did something unforgivable. jesus christ what were you thinking wearing his shirt without asking. you shift trying to ease your embarrassment.
he’s on you in three short strides. making a noise between a growl and snarl. you don’t know how or when you both ended up on the living room floor. frankly, it’s the last thing on your fucking mind now that you’re on your knees cheek pressing into the shag carpet. you can feel the heat of his stare between your legs. you get a glimpse of your shorts and panties strewn across the floor leaving you in his shirt. you wait with bated breath for him to touch you. you wiggle your hips in a silent plead to get him to do something, anything…everything.
he gives the flesh of your ass a heavy smack that has you clenching around nothing. “be good now.” is all you hear before the sting leaves an angry red mark that you know is gonna leave you wincing for the next week. simon smooths a hand over the back of your (his) shirt making a noise in the back of his throat.
you hear shuffling behind you before you feel the head of him catch on to your opening making your mouth gape like a fish out of water. he groans at the contact, kneading the fat of your hips, before he presses in painfully slow with a hiss. you whimper into the carpet, fists balling, feeling hot all over. your cunt pulses trying to make room for him inside your womb.
“i know. i know, pretty girl. almost there.” simon bites back a hiss when you clench at his words. you think you might die like this. laid out on ugly apartment carpet trying to take simon’s cock. you could cry with relief when you feel simon’s balls meet your clit letting you know he’s all the way in. simon lets out a guttural sound bordering on animalistic at the sight of you speared open on his cock, last name across your back, absolutely crying for it.
he fists the bottom of the shirt to keep you still and eases his hips back just to sink back in slowly. the pressure in your navel hurts so good it’s starting to make you dizzy. simon sets a pace that has you trying to cant your hips back to meet his thrusts. he lays a heavy palm in the middle of your back, just under the boldened ‘RILEY’, keeping you pinned giving you no choice but to take what he gives you.
“prettiest fuckin girl i ever seen. gonna give this cunt the proper treatment she deserves, yeah?” he bends his left leg, somehow sliding in deeper. there’s no doubt that you can feel him in your lungs. “s’deep simon.” you slur, reaching a hand back to weakly press against his stomach. he chuckles at the act taking both wrists into one of his hands pressing them at the small of your back, forcing you into a deeper arch. you sob at the change in angle. your nipples being rubbed raw by the friction of his thrusts.
“needed this real bad, huh? don’t worry baby. i’ll make sure you don’t go without it again. wearing those tiny tops think i didn’t notice.” his voice rough and deep behind you. “uh huh.” you reply without a second thought, you don’t even care that you’ve been drooling into the carpet or that you’ve been caught. simon gives a deep chuckle at how pliant you’ve become just from some good dick.
he knows your close by the increasing volume of your sounds. he never lets up his pace determined to give you his all. “where?” he asks in a quick breathe. you take a few seconds to register his words. “huh?” you manage to squeak out. “where do you want me, pretty thing?” he says in an almost pained voice. the gears turn in your head before you speak up “inside. want it inside. m’clean. pill.” resorting to short clipped words. you beg, as if you have to, simon thinks.
your orgasm comes hard and fast leaving you sobbing out garbled version of please and simon. simon is not far behind burying himself as deep as your bodies will allow and comes inside with a pinched “oh fuck.” he pulls out with a pop and watches his spend leak down your slit leaving a small puddle on the floor that he knows he’ll have to scrub out later.
simon pats your backside affectionately. “don’t think we’ll be doing any laundry today” he says with a grin that makes you giggle. “yeah, don’t think so.”
#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x reader#cod x reader#ghost x reader#call of duty x reader#simon riley x reader smut#simon ghost riley x reader smut#ghost smut#cod smut#call of duty smut
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hotch's little sister x spencer perhaps?
—Hotch’s sister graduates college, and Spencer is immediately smitten. fem, 1.6k
“She’s pregnant.” Emily shakes her bag of chips around. “But it’s not his baby.”
Spencer frowns down at his sandwich. Rye bread is hard to cut, and the plastic knife isn’t putting up a good fight. “That’s awful,” he says. “He must be heartbroken.”
“He’s distraught. Now he can’t decide if he wants to stay and raise the new baby with their first, or leave her and have split custody.”
“What channel did you say it was on?”
“It’s on NightDrama. I’ll find out the number.”
Emily folds the empty packet of chips into a rectangle, then that rectangle into a triangle, folding the edges inside of a fold to create a parcel perfect for flicking at him. Spencer waits for it, tensing, but what he sees behind Emily steals his attention.
She whips her head to follow him.
You are, as Spencer watches you walk in, without a doubt one of the prettiest girls he’s ever seen. And it’s not like you’re a model, you don’t walk with any such confidence, but it strikes him immediately. You’re pretty. And he’s never seen you in the office before.
They get visitors occasionally but the majority of people so deep into this office would've been checked at security and cleared to come up here. You hold a visitors badge in your hand, which you promptly clip onto your shirt when you see people looking at you. Your frown makes you prettier. Something about the way you stand seems familiar, but Spencer can’t put his finger on what it is.
“Should we go help?” Emily asks.
“Who do you think she’s for?” Spencer asks back. He’s thinking you’re here to speak to JJ. They have people like this occasionally who JJ knows from past cases, drifting in on a hope that there’s more detail to be found.
Emily stands up from her chair. Spencer follows suit. When you see her facing toward you, some of your apprehension melts into relief.
“Hi,” you say breathily, summoning a smile that, again, seems familiar. Not in looks, but practise, maybe.
“Hi there, can we help? You look lost,” Emily says.
She sounds more friendly than Spencer could’ve hoped to achieve. He doesn’t even wanna think about it, from how pretty you are he would’ve stumbled over even the most basic hello.
“I’m here to see Aaron Hotchner. He told me his office is up the stairs, is that still one of these ones,” —you nod gently at the stairs that do, in fact, lead to his office— “or somewhere else?”
“That’s the right one, the very first door.”
“Okay,” you give a soft laugh. “Thank you. This place makes me nervous.”
You leave to travel up the steps. Emily and Spencer watch without any casualness as you approach Hotch’s office door, and give a little knock.
It’s more surprising to see it tugged open so quickly after. Hotch usually says, “Come in.”
“Oh, you’re here,” Hotch says. It’s to Spencer’s shock and Emily’s clear joy when he leans in for a hug. The bearhug kind, no politeness or manners about their intimidating boss as his arms cross behind your shoulders and he pulls you in. “You’re late.” He squeezes you.
You let it happen. “I hate your building.”
“What the hell?” Emily whispers.
“I’m so happy to see you. Come on, come in, I ordered lunch for us already.”
Emily is shameless. She takes Spencer by the wrist and encourages him to the wall below Hotch’s office as he ushers you inside. The door remains ajar, perfect for snooping, and Spencer doesn’t know what it is but he lets Emily drag him forward anyhow.
“If that’s his girlfriend, he should be ashamed,” Emily whispers.
Spencer raises his brows. “Did you think that was romantic?”
“I’ve never seen him show affection to anyone who wasn’t Haley, and when was the last time she was here?”
Spencer tosses it around in his mind. Sure, it was quite affectionate by Hotch’s standards, but the hug was so… uncareful. He’d grabbed you and hugged you like he was gonna shake you around for fun, like a dad hugs his daughter. “How old is Hotch?” Spencer asks.
“You don’t think that’s his secret kid.”
“No,” Spencer says, though he sort of does.
Emily gestures for him to hush as your laugh drifts down from the office. “You did?” you’re asking. “It’s so nice to be home.”
“Of course I did. It’s like I promised, okay? You finished college like I asked you too, you’ve done so well, and now I’m gonna make sure you’re happy. Like I tried to do for Sean.”
“Sean,” you sigh. “He didn’t even answer my grad card.”
“I don’t know what to say about him, I really don’t.”
A small pause. “Well, at least you answered.”
“You know I would’ve come to watch you walk–”
“But you couldn’t. It’s fine, Aaron, I wasn’t really expecting you to make it.”
“I’m sorry. Really. And I’m proud of you, after everything.”
“Thank you… The bag was better than you being there anyways. Coach?” You laugh breathily. “My friends keep asking me if you can be their big brother too.”
Emily and Spencer turn to each other, mouths agape, Emily slapping his arm as they struggle to make no noise. Since when does Aaron have a sister? A young sister freshly graduated?
Hotch laughs too. “Come and sit before your lunch gets cold.”
Emily gets out her phone to text Morgan, she and Spencer pressed to the wall with their heads ducked. Hotch is a total enigma, because what the hell sort of secret is that?
When Morgan appears, it’s with all the answers. He rolls his eyes at their clear position of eavesdropping but leans against Emily’s desk to give them the information they’re craving anyways. “She’s adopted. Hotch was already in college at the time, but they’re close. They get along a lot better than Hotch does with Sean, that’s for sure.”
“He sounds protective,” Emily says, side-eying the office.
“Look, it’s not my business, but I just know it was bad when she was a teenager. Hotch is a drill sergeant for a reason.” Ah, Spencer thinks. The Hotchner father.
Spencer picks at his hands. It explains the conversation he shouldn’t have been listening to, to a degree. He feels the guilt of knowing something he wasn’t meant to like a sodden weight, retreating swiftly to his desk and his forgotten sandwich.
It’s nice to hear Hotch laughing, but it’s your laugh that draws him in again while he tries so hard not to listen. It’s as attractive to Spencer as your frown had been when you walked in. He thinks about how you finished college, how you’re here, and he wonders if he’ll see more of you —how often will you come in for lunch? Spencer checks his hair in his sleeping monitor and feels like an idiot.
“I’m sorry,” Hotch says a little while later, elbowing open the door with his back to the office, “we’ll have dinner soon, honey, I promise.”
You reach up to give him another quick hug. “It’s fine. It’s just nice to be in the same city again.”
Hotch guides you down to the bullpen with the same pride with which he introduced Jack. It’s unmissable, the love he has for you in just one touch against your shoulder. “Y/N,” he says, pausing at the bullpen, “Derek Morgan you’ve met. This is Emily Prentiss and Spencer Reid.”
“Spencer Reid?” you ask suddenly, looking up into Hotch’s face like he’s lying, your brows pulled together in indignation, before you turn back to Spencer reverently. “You’re Dr. Spencer Reid?”
He gets caught on his own breath. “Uh, yes?”
“The Dr. Spencer Reid who wrote Methods of Continued Fraction Expansions?”
Spencer feels heat like a kiss to each cheek. “Yes.”
You turn to Hotch with a suspicious pout. “When I told you about the paper I was reading by a Dr. Reid a few months ago, you didn’t stop to think it could be your Dr. Reid? Or you just don’t like me?”
That’s a sister’s scorn if Spencer’s ever heard it.
“I thought you said Rain.”
“I don’t think you did.” You turn back to Spencer. “I can’t believe it, I emailed you about Jacobi elliptical functions, you were so helpful, I owe you my degree.” You put your hand out with a beaming, beautiful smile, Spencer’s stomach totally flips. “It’s amazing to meet you in person.”
He’s a germaphobe, he is, and that doesn’t just go away when you meet someone lovely, but he shakes your hand. You surprise him too quickly to think beyond taking your hand letting it happen. You’re, like, glowing.
Hotch gives him a funny look. Mostly impassive, but not quite.
Spencer abruptly lets you go. “I don’t think you would’ve needed my help to get there in the end. You clearly knew what you were doing.”
Hotch’s eyebrows silently rise.
You turn back to Hotch again, your smile catching. “I like your friends.”
He smiles. “Let me walk you down to the lobby, honey.”
You let him guide you away, giving the present members of the BAU a wave with just your fingers before you go.
Morgan and Emily look at him heavily. “Spencer,” Emily says. “What was that?”
He doesn’t want to say what he thinks it was, so he doesn’t. “She was nice.”
Morgan’s laughter is immediate. Spencer has to walk off to the kitchen for a cup of tea he doesn’t drink to escape him and the connotation of his laughing. Spencer hopes he’ll see you again soon, though if he’s half a good a profiler as he thinks he is, he might end up in trouble with your brother.
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