#do you know what a boomer is ALSO HE'S LIKE 30

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

Crimes against humanity: Calling Miguel O'Hara a 'boomer' despite the fact he was born fifty years after any of the people reading this.

Crime against humanity 2: Forgetting that HOBIE is the ACTUAL boomer in this situation and he is technically 'older' by birth year.

[theyanderespecialist]

Yandere Alastor X Pregnant Reader (Headcanons) Alastor's Baby Mama (Hazbin Hotel)

[Hello, My Sexy Muffins! I am back with another update! This one is with Alastor being yandere for his pregnant listener, and headcanons he would be like in this situation, anyways I hope you all enjoy this chapter here, all my sexy muffins!]

(Disclaimer: Alastor is Not Yandere In Canon, this is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all! Simping for fictional characters and yanderes is fine, just do not be illegal or gross about it. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE YOU FLAKY BISCUITS! Yanderes are not ideal partners to have in real life! Also, remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon, thank you!!!)

-Yandere Headcanons With Alastor X Pregnant Listener from Hazbin Hotel-

.Alastor would not be the best dad, in canon Viv has said he would not be against smacking around his kids (REMEMBER HE WAS IN HIS 30s IN THE 1930s HE IS BEYOND BOOMER) 

.He would of course raise his child that was defenseless and needed him. 

.But if his child who is able to "take care" of himself were to get hurt he would find it a bit funny (like in America funniest home videos) 

.Of course, that is when the kids are kids, but what about his pregnant wife? 

.Alastor is Asexual and in hell and thought he could not have kids. 

.Somehow in one of the times he made love to you his partner you had got pregnant. 

.He was a bit in shock, his microphone putting out radio static and him going "Say what now?" 

.How did it happen, why did it happen? 

.Of course, he is yandere for you and would very much want to take it to the next step with you. 

.So if you are not married to him at this point he will propose as he is doing the right thing and will make an honest woman out out of you. 

.Also with his old-time mind set he would say. "I am not going to let my child be a bastard." (Born out of Wedlock) 

.He is not giving you a choice, you are going to be his wife and bound to him, so yeah, good luck with that, lmao. 

.He becomes even more protective of you, realizing that now that you are pregnant you have a target on your back from all his enemies. 

.So he would steal you away and keep you by his side, If you want to leave the hotel, then you will have to be with him and maybe even husk. 

.If not you will be in the hotel and Husk and Niffty will be keeping a close eye on you. 

.He would even reel Charlie and Vaggie into this and use them to keep you safe and sound as well. 

.You are a prisoner to your husband and he is keeping you in this gilded cage. 

.He would of course give you everything you want and need. Except for your freedom of course. 

.Why would you need freedom when you have him, and your future children? 

.He is 1000 percent the type of man who wants his wife at home, pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen. 

.He at first did not want kids but seeing you pregnant has flipped something in him. 

.It mainly has to do with his narcissistic traits, as he will see this child as an extension of himself and their accomplishments will be his as well. 

.So that is nice, but also his yandere side likes seeing you swell with his seed. 

.That pregnant belly, widening hips, and full breasts are signs that you are with HIS Child, that HIS seed has done something to you. 

.This makes him excited in more ways than one because it is a way he can control and manipulate you, and keep you by his side. 

.But it also puts him in la mood because it shows him that you are his and his alone! 

.That you being full with his child is proof you belong to him the radio demon. 

.He would still deal with rivals by killing them and broadcasting their screams across hell. 

.He would be fiercely overprotective possessive and jealous. 

.NO ONE ELSE CAN touch the belly bump, that is HIS Belly bump. 

.He also sleeps with you in his arms a lot now, if you somehow get out of them to get a glass of water and he wakes up without you there. 

.He will appear behind you, snatch you, and teleport through shadows back to the room, place you back in bed where you belong. 

.No midnight snacking for you, unless you ask him first. 

.He is very attentive to all your needs when pregnant and also is a bit more in the mood sex. 

(as asexual can be aroused and horny and have a high libido and CHOOSE To have sex, Asexuality is about Lack of Sexual Attraction NOT The Lack of the Act of Sex itself) 

.So when you get to the want to have sex stage of the pregnancy he is more than willing to satisfy your needs. 

.You have unlocked a beastly side of Alastor good luck. 

.Oh and 1 million percent he would feed you venison and other demon meats while pregnant. 

.He wants to make sure you have a very healthy cannibal diet for you and his spawn. 

.He takes care of you at least, but he does need to be taught more modern ways on raising a child FR FR. 

[YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS another chapter is done! I hope you all enjoyed this and stay sexy all of my sexy muffins!] 

[idontknowreallyidontcare]

Husband!König has many piercings, some he regrets some he admires himself from getting.

Getting in military after many years of bullying gave him lots of confidence, you can see it. From his lines in game you can understand how cocky and sure of himself he is. He’s a colonel now yes, but he was younger too. I believe he got to hookup more from his 19’s to his late 20’s, this gave him a possibility to discover himself, what he liked and to actually explore himself as a young adult. I believe he has had a brow piercing, the hole almost totally closed because he decided it was too risky keeping one on the field (image he actually rips it off because it gets stuck in something;-; ewwww) He just took it off and never really thought about putting it back in.

Classic but I do image him having a tongue piercing. Like listen, we know König eats pussy for pleasure, he would be okay with only feasting on your pussy for the rest of his life if he could choose to. So ofc, when he started to watch porn and noticed many actors having piercings, and how hot il looked while they ate pussy, he just went with it and got one. The fact that he actually went to a piercer instead of just asking Nikto for help by sticking a mf needle in his tongue and risking an infection, is actually pure luck, because our König is also a proud mf, he takes pride in being good at anything, And why wouldn’t he be able to stick a needle in his own tongue alone! (Thank god Nikto was the one to persuade him, he would’ve gotten an infection).

NOW, König has a big cock, we all know it, he knows it, everyone knows it. And how can his big attributes be highlighted if not by some downstairs piercings??? He’s got one on his tip, unfortunately removed due to the discomfort it gave him by constantly rubbing against his TOO TIGHT pants (whore). BUT DONT BE SAD! He once stumbled across a stack of porn magazines, they were old fashioned ones, probably from late 90’s, depicting naked man and women on each and every page (lol ofc they were porn magazine.)

A model in particular captured his attention, his soft dick resting on the side of a thigh, he could see the small piercings along the under part. Thank god König is also a tech genius, he works with advanced technology every day, so a silly and fast google search brings him to what he is looking for, that strange piercing’s name. Yes everyone, a Jacob’s ladder ;). He’s got one, his dick all hot and bothered form the moment he saw that model’s picture, because he was sure that it would feel SO GOOD to be inside a nice hot pussy, feeling how after each and every thrust the piercings would drag around the insides of a girl, making a moaning mess out of her.

Yes he got one, and he was very careful with it, König is a pretty clean lad, he may not have a skincare, may not use fancy lotions and shampoos, but he knows his routine, he keeps himself clean, even more now that he got the piercings. Well I think he got them in his 30’s, he was already mature enough to understand if he could or couldn’t take care of such an important body modification, and he went for it. He got it done when he knew he’d have the most time off from work, where he knew he could spent at least a few months outside the base and actually be able to care for the wound. Very sexy mature choice woof woof bark bark snarl gnawn

He has a failed lip piercing guys, if got ripped off when a bullet hit his face and scarred a bit of his lips, destiny wanted for the bullet to be deviated exactly by his lip piercing. He’s got a bit of a trauma now, refusing to get another one, but still grateful that the first one kinda saved his life and his face from the possibility of a fucking hole being planted inside of it. He was so sexy too, you have seen a pic (yes a pic, I never see anyone talking about how they actually have technology incorporated in their lives! They take pics guys! Like boomers probably, but they do!) you may try to convince him to get one again, and who knows, maybe he’ll actually consider, but only because YOU asked!! Image now the contrast of his tongue piercing and his lip one while he eats you out, woof woof bark, I’d faint.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I stopped going to Family Suppers every weekend?

So in my family it's just four: My Father (76M) and Aunt (72F) live together in the same house, divided in two. My Brother (38M) and me (34F) live on our own in separate houses. We are expected to go have supper with FA(FatherAunt Combo) every weekend and holidays.

This is basically a four hour event every S and S which occupies half the day and my Brother and I both work all week long and have only weekends to rest. My B is a teacher (in school and afterclasses) and I am a Customer Care Specialist, which means we both have to constantly deal with people and we are wrung out one by rambunctious children and unhappy costumers that behave like them respectively.

FA are very needy, wanting constant validation, and are the sort that complain if, for example, I do not call them everyday to check on them, expressing how "callous" and "ungrateful" I am for not "getting interested in them". But I honestly deal with clients all week and I'm all talked out, so to say. Sometimes when I finish I just want to not talk again in the whole day and lie down and not feel like another cog in the machine. I am still expected to fix everything wrong with them or their houses when I finish though, which is what exhausts me.

It might seem easy to say don't give in, but thing is, they have done so much for me and my B. My A helped me rebuild my house and F helped my brother fix his: they're always there when we need them and I love them to bits. They worry and love us and if we're in trouble they're the first to be there. My father helped me with my tumors and the expenses and my Aunt helped me get out of awful situations.

Thing is, this is reciprocal as much as it can be: B and I have always been ready to help where we can, but we don't have the same resources they do (both boomers who basically were hired before they even finished university whilst B and I had to fight years of unemployment and minimum wage and their relentless mockery of it) so what we can do is limited. We still do our best. To an almost unhealthy point. When things break, I fix them - even if I have an art degree and what broke is the washing machine or my fathers boat (my father has a sailing boat and I can barely reach the end of the month with 50uds in my bank account jfc). I cannot buy them a house, but I do my best to repay them for everything as I am.

But this expecting me to come every weekend and be in my Best Mood, never complain or rant and basically entertain them, prepare the table and food and clean the dishes and fix the Tv that broke and the phone that is not working is sucking me dry. My B stopped going at some point, because he finishes work at 21:30 and weekends are his only days off and he said he's exhausted and cannot deal with these expectations, but now I take the brunt of the FA complaining on how awful he is, the asshole he has become, how ungrateful, for not being constantly at their whim and call. And a part of me knows they are toxic, but this is also the people who brought me up, helped me at my worst and the only people who really stood by my side when I needed someone, so maybe it really is asshole behavior to not repay them in some way.

I have tried talking to them about it, explaining that sometimes my body will not work right and my brain shuts down and I need to unplug, but they do not understand and get offended at the simple notion that being with them to us is not as simple as just enjoying their company. Because truth is, to me it is almost an extension of my job: It is CC voice and face and mood, always jovial because I get shit or "have you tried not being sad/tired/angry" and fixing the toilet flush. Do not raise your voice, clean their house (return to clean yours) and maybe get back home at 4 to rest a bit. This every weekend. And I owe it to them for having taking care of me for years when I was at my worst. I already managed to avoid going to make their grocery shopping too, but they're also a certain age and they need the help. Jesus why is this so hard, they're not even my kids and they should be able to take care of themselves and I feel like a mother but they do need the help.

So the question is, WIBTA if I just... did not go? Follow my brother's example, even if I know how they will take it, and just reduce the number of times I go to them? Or would I actually prove myself to be the asshole they consider him to be?

Ah also I am expected to go visit my F after work too, or call him or else I am the unfilial daughter who does not remember she has a father, haha. Man, just writing this makes me exhausted and feeling like a dick because they're old and need the help.

What are these acronyms?

[stonesylove]

A night out in Berlin pt.4

"Babe"

Chapter 3 - Chapter 5

Alessandra was glad she got her alarm on when she woke up because she could never wake up on her own especially after a night out and even more when she had sex the night before, she looked over to the other side of the bed and he was there looking so hot even when he was asleep, Alessandra couldn’t believe what happened the night before but she didn’t have enough time to just sit down and daydream about the man sleeping next to her, so she got up put on her clothes getting mentally ready for the walk of shame to her home, it was truly a bad idea wearing a short shear dress in fall but as her best friend likes to say “A bitch never gets cold”. Alessandra took a cab and quickly texted him so Tom wouldn’t think that he was just a night stand or maybe she was the night stand but still it was worth taking the shot and inviting him for lunch, the Italian girl got to her flat around 8 am knowing she had to be at the studio at 8:30, at least it was close to her building.

The class went by as planned but Alessandra was completely sore from the night before, Tom was a big guy but she didn’t know a British man could do all those things, she thought that he was gonna be a fun vanilla man but she was so wrong, she knew she wouldn’t be giving her all and Giuliana was giving her funny looks through the mirror which made the situation more unserious, when the class ended Alessandra reached out for her phone in her bag to see a text from the British boy, and he was talking about his eyes but that message didn’t make sense to her until she realized she had posted a pic of her outfit and a little secret message for him, she loved that he take everything so lightheaded and didn’t make it serious.

Alessandra Di Maggio

well Tommy I know a couple blue eyed boys, so I had to shoot my shot and wait for someone to fall

My British boy (Tom)

Hmm I remember a short Italian girl kissing me outside of the club telling me that her favorite color was the color of my eyes 🤔

Alessandra Di Maggio

Such a hot girl move from that Italian girl

My British boy (Tom)

Yeah, she’s taking me out for lunch today

I need to talk about her riding techniques, I was impressed 

Alessandra Di Maggio

Hold your horses cowboy and reverse cowboy

My British boy (Tom)

That doesn’t make sense but I’ll give it to you😂😂😂

Alessandra Di Maggio

You just ruined the moment with that emoji grandpa

But I’m down if you wanna teach me some new stuff

My British boy (Tom)

You can’t call me grandpa and then ask me to fuck you in new ways

I guess that’s how ipad kids flirt

Alessandra Di Maggio

I can’t please you, you don’t like my cowboy jokes and you don’t like the grandpa jokes

My British boy (Tom)

Baby you please me in every way possible but you’re way too funny sometimes

But that’s okay, we can search for your funny bone tonight 

Alessandra Di Maggio

Maybe we can also search for your hair bald guy

My British boy (Tom)

I know the buzzcut turns you on funny girl

But I rather see you looking out for your clothes tomorrow morning

Alessandra Di Maggio

We will see, don’t be so desperate let me rest 

See you at 2 o’clock outside of your hotel British boy

Alessandra didn’t know how to feel about Tom yet, of course he really knew how to make her scream and she loved that but she didn’t want to get too caught up with him. Time passed by pretty fast to her liking and when she was brought back to reality she was waiting for the tall man outside of his hotel; she saw his figure walking out of the lobby and fuck he knew how to look like the hottest man alive. “Hi funny girl” Tom said hugging the short girl, “Hi daddy” Alessandra said making him laugh so loud.

“I like experimenting but I don’t think the “daddy thing” is something I like” Tom said catching his breathe, “You don’t like any of the nick names I gave you, literally such a boomer” she said trying to sound hurt but she loved to poke fun at him “Would you prefer if I call you tom nice balls?” She tried to be as serious as she could while saying that, to what Tom shrug his shoulders and said “okay nice tits”; the stupid conversation continued until they arrived to the café.

“So Tommy nice balls what’s your movie about” Alessandra said after ordering, “It’s the hunger games prequel” Tom said without wanting to give much detail because he knew he couldn’t so he tried to guide the conversation somewhere else; they talked about Alessandra’s work in the ballet company, she told Tom about the fall-winter schedule and maybe if he was in town he could go and see one show even tough she felt immediate regret because of Tom’s reaction talking about how he didn’t know what his schedule would be and that maybe he wouldn’t make it so he won’t make any promises, the Italian girl knew she wasn’t that important to him but she wanted to at least show him what she did for living. The lunch “date” was everything she could’ve wish for, they ate this croissant sandwich that he had to take some pictures of, they talked so much about life, what their dreams were, Alessandra told him about her plan of applying for the royal ballet in London or the American ballet theater in New York but she still had to finish the current season, at the end of the lunch, while Tom was being over dramatic about something that happened on set she saw how he phone screen lighted up and a text from someone saved as 

“Babe” appeared on the screen.

For the first time in a while Alessandra didn’t know to feel, of course they weren’t something serious not even a situationship but still she felt like a knot was forming in her stomach, saying something wasn’t an option she didn’t had any right to ask him about it so Alessandra decided to act like she didn’t see that and everything was perfect; after paying and walking out of the small café Tom tried to grab her hand but she made the excuse that it was freezing so putting her hands in her pockets were the only option, “so what do you want to do know” Tom said with a face she couldn’t describe, maybe he noticed something was off with her but she didn’t wanted to give it away, “To be honest I’m a little bit tired so if you want we can go back to my place and watch a movie or something, I know I’ll be home alone for the rest of the day” she said in a stupid impulse, he enjoyed his company and at the end she wanted to at least be friendly until she knew more about “Babe”. They walked to her place joking and talking, it felt like they’ve known each other for all their lives and she loved that both had a similar sense of humor, as they enter the small apartment Alessandra hanged her coat and asked tom for his, “Do you wanna watch the hunger games or billy the kid” she said making fun of him “I love that scene in billy the kid were everyone can see your ass” Tom was shocked but wouldn’t back down either “I’m really proud of my ass, I think the light reflected so beautiful on it” he said making the Italian girl laugh so hard she could felt how she was losing her breathe, they ended up watching this cute romcom she was obsessed with call “love,Rosie”, Tom had a lot of opinions bout how the main character was an asshole and they just needed to ask the other about how they felt ever and that made Alessandra think how his exact words were the same situation they were living.”Well I better get going tomorrow is going to be a long day in set” tom said to then kiss the short girl, took his stuff and got out the apartment. 

When Tom was gone Alessandra looked him up on instagram checking his comment section to see if she could found any comment that would lead her to “babe”, she knew that all she was doing was crazy but the curiosity was eating her alive but this was something she needed to do; Alessandra read all the comments on all his post but every women that commented was either a fan or a friend so she started to think that maybe she had read that wrong and maybe it didn’t said babe but she was sure of what she saw.

Tom Blyth posted a story 

Alessandra Di maggio answered the story 

Oooh you went out with someone to eat croissants 

Tom Blyth 

Yes yes with a cute Italian girl but almost had to grab a high chair for her.

Alessandra Di maggio

You are such a funny guy 🙄

Alessandra decided to post some fun pic of her last couple of weeks also a great bikini pic that went with the aesthetic, specially a pic she took of Tom massaging her feet the night they watched films in her apartment and fuck his hands were HOT, also a pic she took in their night out of him dancing on a table.

Liked by tomblyth, giuli_123 and 1,992 others

Alessssa REd BabE or something like that

Tomblyth great masseur you got there

   alessssa might book another session for this week

giuli_123 coke add?

  alessssa yes, and?

Username1 hottest girl alive

Username2 live your best life girl

Liked by alessa, rachelzegler and 106,823 others

Tomblyth Dumb blonde out and about 

Username1 from who are those hands hun????

  Usename2 must be Rachel

     Username3 she doesn’t have long hair rn

Hunterschafer your almost a Berlin boy now

 (Tom liked the comment)

Username4 RUE WHEN WAS THIS????

alessssa fav natural blonde

   Tomblyth 100% natural, grow by me

     Username5 babe who’s this

       Username6 private profile??

         Username7 grow up, men can have friends

Joshandrerivera living your best life Tommy boy

    (Tom liked the comment)

Rachezegler that’s some nice red polish

    Username8 right?????

      Username9 those are your hands???

        Username10 MOTHER

After the date they had or well she didn’t know what to called what was that but she had an amazing time with Tom but she couldn’t get out of her head the thought of him having someone else in the States, she knew this wasn’t something serious but she didn’t want to be the other woman, that’s why she decided to text him get the conversation started and ask him about that.

Alessandra Di Maggio

So do you have a girl in every country you work in?

My British Boy (Tom)

That’s not funny Alessandra 🙄

Do you think I’m a fuck boy?

Alessandra Di Maggio 

Don’t call me Alessandra🙄🙄

I’m not judging

My british Boy (Tom)

That’s your name pretty girl

I won’t call you a Alessandra if you won’t call me fuck boy

Alessandra Di Maggio

I promise you I won’t call you a fuck boy

But being serious you don’t have a girl back home?

 (Delivered 2:22 am)

[blackbackedjackal]

What's funny is I do forget I'm 30 sometimes and that my generation is taking over certain fields, especially veterinary medicine.

Janice was some old ass boomer with no empathy, but the ladies at the ER were all my age and made me feel very safe. I saw the girl who checked me in had anime stickers on her water bottle and I was like "oh nice you have a soul AND good taste"

There's a chance I may be saying goodbye to Lobo. I'm remaining hopeful but realistic. But you know what? We had a really good day. He was still himself even though he's sick and he's with people that treated me and the other people who walked in like a person.

Knowing my generation has so much love and kindness and empathy really keeps me going.

Also we desperately need more Veterinarians in this country. For every 10 vet techs there's one one vet now. Please consider it if you're already pursuing your education.

[solarbird]

The long arc of Boomer politics, of resistance, and what Millennials & Zoomers can win starting now

Yesterday, I wrote – mostly to GenX, but also to Millennials and Zoomers – about holding the line one more time. In that post, I talked a little about how some of us have been doing that job this long in order to keep some semblance of a Republic until the cavalry – in the form of a group larger than the Baby Boom – could show up, and still have the tools to take power peacefully, and in a timely fashion.

Today I’m writing for Millennials and for Zoomers. I’m going to expand on yesterday, talk about history, talk about why politics have been as they’ve been in ways you maybe haven’t heard before, and I’m going to talk about the massive opportunity you have now to change this fucking game.

But I have to talk about history first. There’s context, and you need it.

Most of you reading this have never seen actual Generation X politics. Unless you’re from Seattle, or the greater Seattle area, you definitely never have. You’ve only seen Baby Boom politics. What you’re seeing now is still Baby Boom politics, the underlying dynamic unchanging and now crystalised, ritualised, and radicalised over the decades since they took power.

That’s happened in part because the Baby Boom never wanted to talk to anyone else, and didn’t have to. They had a saying – “don’t trust anyone over 30” – that inverted and became “don’t trust anyone under 30″ the moment they hit their 30s. As a group, they’ve despised everyone younger than them my entire life, writing early on that GenX was either “a generation of Darwinesque hyper-predators” (fun stuff if you’re 12) or “useless lazy slackers incapable of achievement” from the very beginning. Most of the time it manifests as simply being locked out and ignored, but I’ve had that raw generational contempt thrown directly at me, more than once – even here in Seattle.

But the thing about Seattle is… we outnumber them here. It’s the only place in the US where we outnumber them. They’ve had to deal with other people, whether they liked it or not. Because of that, they couldn’t really lock into that inward-facing self-reinforcing spiral. They had reality checks and external feedback they had to grapple with, and so… their politics stayed way, way more normal.

So if you want to know what Generation X politics would’ve looked like in a more traditional American pattern, where each generation is larger than the previous – hi. It’s in Seattle, and to a lesser degree Washington State. We’re willing to elect socialists who call themselves socialists and actually have something like a centre-left, and it’s not just downtown.

I mean, there are reasons that Donald Trump didn’t win the white vote here, and this is a big part of it. According to exit polling at the time, he didn’t get the non-college-educated white male majority here in 2016. It was close! But even with the dry side of the state involved – a lot of which is rabidly christofascist – Donald Trump didn’t even win non-college-educated white men, his core, statewide in 2016.

(It’s also a factor in why the Battle of Seattle could happen, I am just saying. I was there.)

But outside Seattle, and outside Washington State, you’re generally looking at Boomer politics. And I think Generation X has always kinda known that was going to happen, in that we were never going to have a turn at power. Certainly not at the national scale.

Some of us, in fact, have not just known that but have also understood it, which is a different thing. I spent enough time east for school, I could see what was coming and how it was going to play out, and how it was going to be such a long, long war for the Republic – and largely, an effort just to hold. To be a backstop. A centre-left line to keep civil society and elections until someone bigger than them could finally come along.

The fact that we even managed to win on a few fronts – queers, I’m looking at us, but not just us – that was amazing. And also outliers, let’s not kid ourselves. But I’ll take those victories and celebrate them.

So when everything looks so rigid and hopeless and stale, and when you’re seeing “elections don’t fix it, everything just gets worse,” that’s why it looks that way, even when it isn’t actually like that.

Because thanks to their sheer size, their sheer numbers, the Boom just plain outmassed everyone else since like 1980 and everyone’s had to play by their rules all this time.

We could win a round here and there, and even make some real progress in narrow but important areas. But we couldn’t change the game. Hence our fight to keep a civil society not in the politeness sense but in the sense of functional institutions sense, and the fight to keep elections not in the “technically there are elections” sense but in the “elections that can have outcomes Republicans don’t like” sense.

We are at the very tail end of that war now. We have almost won a war most people haven’t even been aware that we’ve been fighting.

2024 is the last best shot they have. They want to keep power, because of course they do. They grabbed it early – skipping ahead of the Silent generation – and haven’t talked to anyone else about power since, just like so many of them never talked to anyone outside their cohort they didn’t have to. But this year is pretty much the end of their dominance unless they can rig everything to keep the appearance of power until they actually die, and they know it.

And by “they know it,” I mean, I actually heard Boomer rightists saying things to that effect in 2016, amongst themselves.

That’s why everything changes after this election, but not during this election. 2024 is the tipping point. Still the old rules, but hopefully the end of them.

If we win – and we will win if we fight – it’ll be because Millennials and Zoomers stepped in and said “that’s enough, grampa.” And everyone who actually works and understands politics will know it.

And since everyone will know it, everything – EVERYTHING – will start to re-orient itself around you. Around Millennials and around Zoomers. It won’t be all at once, but it will absolutely happen.

As long as you keep showing up, as long as you start doing the work, every mechanic of power, every political interest group, every big money, every piece of the machine will start to turn towards you. Because whatever else may be true, the professionals know where the power lies, and it’ll lie with you.

Not us, not GenX. We have a voice in Cascadia, and I love my country-not-a-country bioregion, but that’s the only place we get one. The power brokers will skip us, like they always have. They’ve never figured out how to market to GenX, they thought they were going to “own” Millennials (literal quote there on ‘own’ btw), and they have no idea at all what to do with Zoomers and I thank the gods for it.

It’ll be you, Millennials and Zoomers. You. You will be the ones everyone cares about, as the new power centre of politics. The Baby Boom will try to grab power back, but as long as you keep showing up, they won’t pull it off. In practical terms, it’ll be over.

If we win. Which we will, if we fight and fight together.

But for this election, we’re still under the old rules. The Baby Boom rules, the Baby Boom politics, the Baby Boom control. That’s why I’m praying this can be GenX’s last hurrah as a resistance force, and that’s why I write so much about holding the goddamn line once again, just like so many of us – not all of us, but so many – have done our entire lives.

One more time, no matter how much you hate having to pick between two doddering old monsters…

…we gotta hold the line. We gotta hold the line for your sake, and for our own. Just like we always have.

But after that?

After that, as long as you keep showing up…

…it’ll be all about you.

You’re so close to being able to start taking power and setting the agenda. After all these years, it’s finally the time when you can actually start to do it.

But you gotta help us hold the line in ’24, first. We gotta hold again one, last time, the old way.

And then it’ll be yours.

If you’re willing to take it.

Are you ready?

110 days remain.

-----

[extended commentary and a lot of replies at source]

[abbies-rescuebot-stuff]

uh oh, info dump time

info about the bots in my universe

ive done a bit of rearranging with when certain things happen, mostly in rba, so just keep that in mind.

there's some info about robot parenthood at the bottom, so you may wanna give that a read first otherwise you be a little confused by some of the terms i use.

i'll probably come back to this from time to time, so keep an eye on it. ;) you never know who else might join the party.

Main Four

Heatwave Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 27 (RB S1, 2012) 31 (RB S4, 2016) 33 (RBA S1, 2018) 35 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 42 (2027) 45 (2030) 49 (2034)

Status- Living

Personality Overview- Heatwave was born into a world of passion, fueled by his carrier's desire for greatness. He took a lot after her, especially temper. However, the older he got, the more he mellowed out. He's a very proud and stubborn bot, which often rubs off on others. His role as leader has inspired others to better themselves. Bits and pieces of his fiery attitude can be seen in his children, especially his daughter, Firefly.

Occupation- Rescue Bot (firefighter) Academy professor

Immediate Family- "The Bull" (sire) Wildfire (carrier) Possibly numerous half-siblings Blades (conjunx, carrier of children) Hotshot (oldest adoptive son) Firefly (younger daughter) Torch (youngest son)

Other relatives- Sabre (ex-amanti, separated on good terms) Quickshadow (older sister-like figure) Cody (younger brother-like figure)

Chase Pronouns- He/Him

Earth age(s)- 26 (RB S1, 2012) 30 (RB S4, 2016) 32 (RBA S1, 2018) 34 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 41 (2027) 44 (2030) 48 (2034)

Personality Overview- What comes off as cold and uncaring is really just the way Chase was raised and how he shield's himself from past trauma. His analytical nature has served him well in avoiding social situations that may not benefit him. Why waste his time on something if it has nothing to do with his current task? Slowly but surely though, his walls have come down, and his bottled up emotions pouring out, allowing him to truly heal and live without fear. At the end of the day, he loves curling up with a good book, especially if it's of the crime fiction variety.

Status- Living

Occupation- Rescue Bot (police/law enforcement) Academy professor

Immediate Family- Patron/Pata (patron, real name unknown) Cruise Control (matron) Unborn sparks (siblings, failed to thrive) Unborn spark (miscarriage with Pierce) Boulder (conjunx, sire of children) Wedge (oldest adoptive son) Hoist (younger adoptive son) Boomer (youngest son)

Other relatives- Sabre (maternal cousin) Pierce (ex-amanti) Blades Pronouns- He/She

Earth Age(s)- 25 (RB S1, 2012) 29 (RB S4, 2016) 31 (RBA S1, 2018) 33 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 40 (2027) 43 (2030) 47 (2034)

Personality Overview- If you ever want to hear the latest gossip around town, Blades is your bot. Binging reality TV shows brings her much joy, a passion she shares with her daughter, Firefly, who will vehemently deny liking such things. This plucky little helibot is all about staying active and healthy while also, much to their behest, often dragging his family into doing the latest and greatest exercise regimes. She does love lazing around like a couch potato occasionally though.

Status- Living

Occupation- Rescue Bot (paramedic) Academy professor

Immediate Family- Unknown creators Heatwave (conjunx, sire of children) Hotshot (oldest adoptive son) Firefly (younger daughter) Torch (youngest son)

Other Relatives- Unknown

Boulder Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 24 (SB S1, 2012) 28 (RB S4, 2016) 30 (RBA S1, 2018) 32 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 39 (2027) 42 (2030) 46 (2034)

Personality Overview- A lovable teddy bear who just wishes everyone would get along. Don't take his kindness and wishes for naivety though. While he may not have had a happy beginning, he uses his experience to better the lives of others and has played a vital role in the healing of his conjunx, adoptive child, and even himself. His day isn't complete until he's made his family smile, even the tiniest. He has a special interest in botany and ornithology, finding joy in pastimes relating to his passions.

Status- Living

Occupation- Rescue Bot (engineer) Academy professor

Immediate Family- Unknown creators Glory (adoptive matron/carrier, academy sponsor) Chase (conjunx, carrier of children) Wedge (oldest adoptive son) Hoist (younger adoptive son) Boomer (youngest son)

Other Relatives- Unknown

Offspring

Wedge Pronouns- He/They

Earth Age(s)- 13 (RBA S1, 2018) 14 (RBA S2, 2019) 15 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 22 (2027) 25 (2030) 29 (2034)

Personality Overview- Since his brother was born, Wedge has strived to be the best role model for him. They still often struggle with when Pierce came to the academy, but nothing a big hug from his family can't fix and take his mind off of it...only if for a little while. Sometimes though they need a little extra helping hand from someone who isn't family to ease his nerves. To this day, he still owns a few decks of Heroes of Cybertron cards, and no, he will never get rid of them.

Status- Living

Occupation- Rescue Bot (construction)

Immediate Family- Pierce (patron/sire) Unborn sparks (tube brood, failed to thrive) Boulder (adoptive sire) Chase (adoptive carrier) Hoist (adoptive younger brother) Boomer (adoptive youngest brother)

Other Relatives- Patron/Pata (maternal grandpatron) Cruise Control (maternal grandmatron) Glory (adoptive grandmatron) Scorch (on-again/off-again amanti)

Hoist Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 13 (RBA S1, 2018) 14 (RBA S2, 2019) 15 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 22 (2027) 25 (2030) 29 (2034)

Personality Overview- Hoist is a bright bot with a gentle spark and an inquisitive mind when it comes to creating new gadgets and gizmos. Hoist came to join his new family after his creators, who were already a bit distant from the young engineer, perished due to unsafe working conditions. Nothing makes him more happy than to tinker with his inventions and spend time with his adoptive parents and brothers, and of course his amanti, Whirl.

Status- Living

Occupation- Rescue Bot (engineering)

Immediate Family- Unknown creators (deceased) Boulder (adoptive sire) Chase (adoptive carrier) Wedge (adoptive older brother) Boomer (adoptive youngest brother)

Other Relatives- Patron/Pata (maternal grandpatron) Cruise Control (maternal grandmatron) Glory (adoptive grandmatron) Whirl (amanti)

Hotshot Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 13 (RBA S1, 2018) 14 (RBA S2, 2019) 15 (Post RBA S2, 2020) 22 (2027) 25 (2030) 29 (2034)

Personality Overview- Full of energon and vigor, Hotshot's hyperactive mind is not easy to temper. However, with his adoptive father's firm guidance and his adoptive mother's gentleness, he can focus his energy into his work with mostly positive results. No one is perfect, and Hotshot knows that, all that matters is that he tries his best, and that's all anyone who knows him asks for.

Status- Living

Occupation- Rescue Bot (multi-class, firefighter)

Immediate Family- Unknown creators (abandoned) Heatwave (adoptive sire) Blades (adoptive carrier) Firefly (adoptive younger sister) Torch (adoptive youngest brother)

Other Relatives- "The Bull" (paternal grandsire) Wildfire (paternal grandcarrier) Medix (amanti)

Boomer Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 0 (2020) 7 (2027) 10 (2030) 14 (2034)

Personality Overview- Boomer inherited his love for nature from his sire, but also takes care to understand the balance and laws it enacts on the world. Using his knowledge, he applies what he's learned from his experience and what his creators have taught him into his lessons at the academy. He's a fan of Hawaiian shirts and Jurassic Park and also has a love for reptiles and insects. He has a stuffed albino ball python named Philomena who he sleeps with every night.

Status- Living

Occupation- Academy student

Immediate Family- Boulder (sire) Chase (carrier) Wedge (adoptive oldest brother) Hoist (adoptive older brother)

Other relatives- Patron/Pata (maternal grandpatron) Cruise Control (maternal grandmatron) Glory (adoptive grandmatron)

Voice Claim- Paul Mikel-Williams

Firefly Pronouns- She/Her

Earth Age(s)- 0 (2020) 7 (2027) 10 (2030) 14 (2034)

Personality Overview- Basically if Heatwave's genes Ctrl-C and Ctrl-V'd themselves. Firefly has a bit of her carrier in her too though. She can be very excitable and optimistic about things, while on the other hand, dark humor is her favorite kind. She’s the kind of kid that would hang out in a cemetery all night for fun and to prove that "c'mon guys, it's not that scary!" She enjoys hanging out with her best friend, Boomer, and loves her little brother, Torch, conditionally.

Status- Living

Occupation- Academy student

Immediate Family- Heatwave (sire) Blades (carrier) Hotshot (adoptive older brother) Torch (younger brother)

Other relatives- "The Bull" (paternal grandsire) Wildfire (paternal grandcarrier)

Voice Claim- Kensington Tallman

Torch Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 0 (2027) 3 (2030) 7 (2034)

Personality Overview- Is either a complete genius or dumber than a bag of rocks. There is no in between. One may often find him in the middle of the night staring at his creators as they slumber, wanting...something. What does he want? He doesn't know, but he knows he wants it and he wants it now.

Status- Living

Occupation- None/student

Immediate Family- Heatwave (sire) Blades (carrier) Hotshot (oldest adoptive brother) Firefly (older sister)

Other Relatives- "The Bull" (paternal grandsire) Wildfire (paternal grandcarrier)

voice claim- AJ Kane

Other Bots

Sabre Pronouns- He/They

Earth Age(s)- 20s (pre/current-war) 33 (post-war, RBA S1, 2018) 34 (at time of Frostbite's emergence, RBA S2, 2019) 35 (post-RBA S2, 2020) 43 (at time of Icicle's emergence, 2028) 49 (2034)

Personality Overview- Sabre was bit of a party animal in his early years. After his first couple of years at the academy, he straightened out quickly while still maintaining a fun attitude and generally being a well-respected, strong leader. He was once on the same team as Heatwave, being his second in command, and was his amanti, but the two amicably split after Sabre left the team to lead his own squadron of first responders. It was through him that Heatwave met Chase and Blades (separately), ultimately leading to the re/formation of the Sigma-17 first responder team. It's also through Sabre that the Academy on Earth receives new recruits.

Status- Alive

Occupation- Rescue Bot (pre-war, inactive) Dean/Principal of Academy on Cybertron (current)

Immediate Family- Unknown creators Snowraith (conjunx, sire of children) Frostbite (oldest son) Icicle (youngest daughter)

Other Relatives- Chase (maternal cousin) Quickshadow (paternal cousin) Heatwave (ex-amanti, separated on good terms)

Voice Claim- Alastair James

Pierce Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 20s (as a Rescue Bot) Early-30s (as a Decepticon, at time of Wedge's emergence) 36 (since last seeing him, post-RBA S2, 2019)

Personality Overview- Cocky, flirtatious, and has a need to control everything and everyone. He can't stand the idea of something not going his way, especially when it comes to relationships. He will do or say whatever he needs to for everything to be in his favor. That's why when innocent, naïve little Chase came into his clutches, he dare not let go.

Status- Living (incarcerated)

Occupation- Rescue Bot (unknown, possibly construction) Decepticon (unknown rank/occupation) None (incarcerated)

Immediate family- Unknown (low-born) Unborn sparks (offspring, failed to thrive) Unborn spark (miscarriage with Chase) Wedge (offspring/son)

Other Relatives- Chase (ex-amanti)

Voice Claim- Eric Dane

"The Bull" (real name unknown) Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 30s (at time of Heatwave's conception/emergence) 40s (since seeing him last) Unknown

Personality Overview- Not much is known about Heatwave's sire, not even where his nickname came from, other than he was battle-hardened and ready to fight at the drop of a hat. Years of being a successful combatant in the gladiator pits has led him feeling little to no emotion towards others. Every bot has needs though...just ask all of his previous partners.

Status- Unknown (most likely deceased)

Occupation- Gladiator (at time of Heatwave's conception/emergence) Unknown

Immediate Family- Possibly numerous partners Wildfire (one-time fling, carrier of child) Heatwave (son) Possibly numerous offspring

Other Relatives- Unknown

Voice Claim- ———

Wildfire Pronouns- She/Her

Earth Age(s)- 20s (height of her career) 30s (at time of Heatwave's conception/emergence) Unknown

Personality Overview- She's didn't take no scrap from no one. If she didn't like someone, she would let them know. She was prideful, but didn't care to boast. Everyone already knew she was the best. If you ever wondered where Heatwave got his fiery spirit from, all fingers would be pointed in her direction.

Status- Unknown (most likely deceased)

Occupation- Gladiator (before retiring due to injury) Arena Battle-Matron/Sponsor (before Heatwave's emergence) Lobbing coach Unknown

Immediate Family- "The Bull" (one-time fling, sire of child) Heatwave (son)

Other Relatives- Unknown

Voice Claim- Nicki Rapp

Chase's Patron/Pata (real name unknown) Pronouns- He/Him

Earth Age(s)- 30s (at time of Chase's conception/emergence) 40s (since seeing him last) Unknown

Personality Overview- Keeps to himself, not very sociable. He was a good provider according to Chase, but didn't interact with him all that much. When Cruise passed away though, Chase's patron started reaching out to him. They had started to build up a good relationship with each other until the fateful day Chase never returned home.

Status- Unknown (most likely deceased)

Occupation- Unknown (some sort of law enforcement)

Immediate Family- Unknown creators (high-class bots) Cruise Control (conjunx, arranged, matron of child) Chase (sole offspring) Unborn sparks (offspring, failed to thrive)

Other Relatives- Wedge (adoptive grandchild) Boomer (grandson)

Voice Claim- Jeremy Sisto

Cruise Control Pronouns- They/Them

Earth Age(s)- 30s (at time of Chase's conception/emergence) 40s (at death)

Personality Overview- Gentle, soft-spoken, firm but fair. They would often sing to Chase to sleep when he first emerged. They just wanted the best for Chase. They're remembered fondly by Chase, especially after Boomer is born.

Status- Deceased

Occupation- Rescue Bot (law enforcement, retired) Stay at home matron (until death)

Immediate Family- Unnamed creators (upper-class bots) Unnamed spark-siblings Chase's Patron/Pata (conjunx, arranged, patron of child) Chase (sole offspring) Unborn sparks (offspring, failed to thrive)

Other relatives- Wedge (adoptive grandchild) Boomer (grandson)

Voice Claim- E.R. Fightmaster

Glory Pronouns- She/Her

Earth Age(s)- 40s (first time meeting Boulder, at time of his enrollment as a rescue bot recruit) 50s (at time of Boulder's promotion to full-time rescue bot, since seeing her last)

Personality Overview- Sweet as sugar, and the most patient bot you'll ever meet. She's the kind of bot that would call you "baby/honey" unironically and is basically a saint. She would have loved Earth and all of its beauty.

Status- Unknown (most likely deceased)

Occupation- Foster matron Sponsor Caregiver

Immediate Family- Unknown Boulder (ward, adoptive son)

Other relatives- Wedge (adoptive grandchild) Boomer (adoptive grandson)

Voice Claim- Natasha Rothwell

What is a matron/patron and why aren't they the same as a carrier/sire? A matron/patron, or matriarch/patriarch, is a bot who has offspring, (sparkling's, bitlet's, sparklet's, etc.), that have been produced via alternative means versus the common, low-class methods (interfacing). If one wanted sparkling's and were lucky enough to be well off financially, they may invest in this different kind of conception. Since these bots did not technically sire/carry the sparkling, they are simply known as a matron/patron. They may choose to be called by either/any name if they so wish. Many middle to upper-class families may choose this form of procreation for religious beliefs, personal preference, or peer pressure.

A matron/patron may also only procreate as a means of status, having as many as they can afford to create and marrying them off to other mid/upper-class families.

How does it work? With either one or two creators, pieces of their DNA are put into a tiny protoform, creating new life. From there, it's up to the creator(s) if they wish to raise the newspark as a normal sparkling or if they wish to accelerate its growth. Accelerating its growth process skips over any undesirable steps a carrier would normally have to go through, such as enduring symptoms of carrying the unborn spark, emergence pains, and so on. The newspark will grow until they have reached an age where they can be independent but still malleable. In earth terms, these newsparks would be around the age of nine years old, equaling to nine months, the normal growth cycle for a human fetus.

How can these terms best be used? Middle to upper-class bots prefer matron/patron to less informal names or no name at all. If produced through methods like interfacing, offspring will refer to their creators as mata/pata until they've outgrown the terms. Sparkling's born on alien planets may be more inclined to refer to their creators by names from the native dialect of the world though. An example of this would be a bitlet referring to their creator(s) as mama/papa, regardless of whether they are masculine or feminine-presenting.

What if a bot identifies as [pronouns here]? It really is personal preference. If a sparkling has a femme (she/her) sire and/or a mech (he/him) carrier, matron/mata and patron/pata can be interchanged. Patron/Matron are more so meant to be gender-neutral and not adhere to specific gender roles, just what their coding dictates and/or the preference of the parent(s).

TLDR; just a buncha mumbo-jumbo about giant alien robots and their mommies and daddies. 👍

bonus family tree pic of the main four's families. quickshadow and sabre not included bc ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"the bull" and chase's patron are to the left of their partners, while wildfire and cruise and to the right. glory is by herself.

[galaxythedragonshifter]

Herobrine Headcanons because I feel obligated to do so~

It's me, I'm the obligation

Herobrine is NOT evil in my headcanon. The whole evil "leafless trees go brrrr" thing never resonated with me. I definitely can and will read a story with evil Hero in it, but it has to be done well. In my opinion, the Gameknight999 books didn't really write Hero in a way that made sense (or for villains in general, frankly). It seems really difficult for official (and published unofficial) Minecraft products to actually make him into an interesting character (something a lot of fanfictions seem to accomplish easily). I'm assuming it's because fanfiction writers do it for free, out of their love for the media, and those who actually publish said story into a physical Minecraft product are only monopolizing on the success of Minecraft in general. That's also another reason why I'm glad MCSM went the way they did. I'm glad they didn't go the Steve, Herobrine, and Alex route. Personally, I love the story and the world they've created with Jesse and the others. (Sorry this one was so long Imao)

However, there are rumors of him being evil floating around. I mean, a white eyed man that doesn't just survive, but thrives in the Nether could be terrifying, to be fair.

He looks like he's in his early 30's but he's actually 217. He's an old man. (But also not really, if you're comparing it to the equivalent of other human's lifespans).

Not a demigod. Just a superpowered human with plot armor and pure fury.

Because he's been in the Nether on his own for the most part (spare the mobs), he doesn't really know anyone else really. He hasn't had proper human interaction in several decades, so he's not the best at socializing.

In tandem with the last one, it results in him being lonely. He of course didn't know he is though. He's gaslighted himself into thinking he's not. This also results in him having a hard time trusting others. Like, at all. He prefers to do everything on his own, and hates to ask for help, admit if he can't do something, or show weaknesses to others. (Resulting in him also having a problem with bottling up emotions, until they are too much to handle.)

If he does meet someone he can trust though, he will be incredibly loyal, protecting that person no matter what. Even if it makes him come off slightly aggressive. (He's kinda like a grizzly bear in this way. Aggressive when protecting those he trusts.)

He usually hides his anger well. He'll also hide his other emotions from those he doesn't trust. (Which is pretty much everyone).

Sarcastic "I hate everything and everyone" mood

"Well if you weren't this stupid. you wouldn't be in this mess."

"What the hell are you doing? Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

Disappointed dad glare and pose™

His eyes do, in fact, have somewhat distinguishable pupils. But they're almost the same color, and with the glow, they're super hard to see unless you really observe his face. And he'd probably say something along the lines of "Stop that." In a really annoyed tone if you tried.

Going along with the last one, his eyes do show emotion. They can flicker with certain emotions (and depending on how conflicted he is, the fastor or slower they might flicker), and become dimmer for longer bad mood episodes. They grow brighter with more intense emotions like anger, but dim with emotions like sadness, disappointment, ect. He can control it to an extent, but it's like breathing or blinking. It's usually involuntary unless he's consciously thinking about it.

Looks like he could kill you, can definitely kill you, but is also a cinnamon roll.

His hair goes past his ears. And it's just a mop of brown hair. Like, he brushes it, but the man's got messy hair all the time.

Ok boomer (he's much older than that LMAO-)

He's 5'6. So short-ish, but not too short.

He can telepathically communicate with mobs to an extent. He can direct them and get a basic feel for Thier emotions, but not really any "talking". Kinda like charades.

Speaks Swedish and is bilingual (English and Swedish). And no, I'm not taking any criticism on this one, because I read it in a fic and I've been obsessed with the idea for years. I will die on this hill.

If he knows you, and you do something stupid (especially a newbie Nether mistake), he will stand there and judge you. Menacingly.

Classic blue shirt with indigo pants. Also likes to wear a tattered dark blue cape (that has a hood) when he's out and about.

Contrary to popular belief, he actually prefers Netherite over diamond weapons. He's also a pretty good archer, but it's not his preference.

He's got fire powers, teleportation, abnormal strength, flight, and the ability to read mob's body language. He actually rarely uses flight, and only does it when bored, or he does it absentmindedly as a stim. If he does he'll just kinda float around. He also has enhanced healing as well, and wounds typically heal faster. In addition to that, he can die, but it has to be more extensive damage than fatal wounds would typically be. Especially if he has no potions on him. (He can't like, heal instantly or anything). However, his powers do use his energy, so he can only do so much. (He can still pack quite the punch though. And take quite a few hits.)

Extremely good fighter and has good control over his powers. Typically hides him emotions from those he doesn't trust/know. (Even from someone he may trust). A pretty good archer, but not his preference. Surprisingly good at building. Good with potions and crafting.

Brine absolutely cannot understand social cues or cultural social cues. He also for the life of himself can't stand the cold. He does have resistance to extreme temperatures, but he just really dislikes the cold. He still feels uncomfortable in the snow, especially since he lives in the Nether, resulting in the cold resistance not really being as effective.

He does have nicknames, but he only lets people use them if they are on a nickname basis (he has to really trust that person). His nicknames are Brine and Hero.

He's Aroace. The man's got no understanding of romance in general, much less flirting. (If someone flirts with him, he'll just be like: "No.")

Probably a dog person. He gives dog person vibes. No, i will not elaborate.

He lives in the Nether for the most part. He has extensive knowledge of the location, and he has a much higher heat tolerance. Although, he isn't necessarily the "Nether king" as far as rumors go. He just kinda resides there, and the mobs leave him alone for the most part.

He doesn't curse often, but if he does, he typically uses "damn and hell" and thier variations.

His hobbies consist of exploring the Nether, fighting, crafting, and surprisingly, reading.

His favorite color is blue. He doesn't see much of it in the nether.

Trust issues go brrr

Social anxiety also go brrrr

"You have no self preservation, whatsoever."

He's good at fighting his way out of a situation, but his plan B is always sarcasm. Just, sarcastic witty banter. (He's got King Jaron vibes, for those who read the Ascendance Series)

He sometimes likes to annoy people, when he is around people he knows. If it's someone he dislikes though, it's more often and snarky.

Some character flaws for y'all: Blunt, bold, emotionally distant, perfectionist, overprotective, rebellious, stubborn, smart-alek, can hold grudges for a while, trust issues,

*literally gets impaled* "Oh cool a sword-" *collapses* (Alt: "Rude...")

"Have you lost your damn MIND?"

"Don't you Dare throw that snowba- dammit!" (if you haven't noticed, I'm having fun with the dialogue)

He's kinda based on many iterations of Herobrine I've read over the years, with some of my own twists on it. He's basically a mixture of my favorite traits from other versions.

I may sometime make a part 2, idk. I've been developing my version of Herobrine for like, 2-3 years now lmao. So possibly. Imma see how much my brain forgot after I've posted this lmao 😭

Y'all can feel free to send asks or comment about him if ya wanna, they're always open!

Also, I'm sorry this post is so long ajjsjdhdhhdhd. More content for you ig XD-

And some other things, I DO have more Herobrine content. (In the works and not). I already have a Fic on my Ao3 page called Ex Prince. (However, it isn't canon to my current Headcanons of him, as that was a lot earlier in his development stage.)

Tags: @locatebiome (you have Hero all over your blog so yah. Lemme know if ya want the tag removed akjshgdhdg) @yumeyumeappleo

[shentheauthor]

i see your fatui harbingers headcanons and would like to ask - do you have some for them playing windtrace? i got into playing it and its really fun

Oooh yes!!!

Pierro: he’s so bad at it. He always gets caught as a rebel, and he doesn’t know how to work the controls as a hunter. Certified old man moment lmao

Capitano: bad at being a rebel, shockingly good at being a hunter. Mf will capture people SO fast. Nobody lasts more than a minute, so everyone hates playing with him.

Dottore: he doesn’t like playing, but he loves watching people play. He calls it a “social experiment.” If he’s forced to play, he makes a great rebel. The only one who can catch him is Scaramouche.

Columbina: the best rebel by far. Literally nobody can catch her. Surprisingly good at being a hunter too. She won her first game as hunter so fast 😭😭😭 everyone is scared to get her as hunter.

Arlecchino: HATES playing. She thinks it’s “childish.” She’ll play if forced tho, and she usually does pretty well as hunter and rebel. She hates playing with Childe tho, and tries her damn hardest to make him lose no matter what. She fails.

Pulcinella: another certified old man. People let him win as a hunter sometimes, just to make him feel better. He knows this, and he sends them on really shitty missions as punishment. No mercy :)

Scaramouche: has to be forced to play, but he will do everything in his power to piss people off when he does play. He hides in the stupidest places and always manages to grab the favor first as a rebel, and he targets Dottore and Childe as hunter. Everyone hates him.

Sandrone: oh she ALWAYS targets Childe. She somehow always knows where he is (she cheats). She’s ruthless as a hunter, and while she may not always win, it’s always a struggle to escape her. Not as good at being a rebel tho. She never picks good hiding spots.

Signora: girlie is also a boomer 😭 she doesn’t know how to work the controls, and she refuses to learn. She will stand out in the open as a rebel, but she threatens to burn or freeze whoever dares to come near her. She doesn’t do well as a hunter, but she will manage to capture at least one person without threatening them.

Pantalone: oh he’s shit at it. He’s SO bad 😭😭😭😭. Mf will accidentally let go of his disguise and fall out of wherever he was trying to hide. As a hunter, he’s bad too. He’s such a dumbass. He tries to bribe people into letting him win, but it never works (unless it’s Dottore or Sandrone, they really want research money)

Tartaglia: terrible at being a rebel, but FANTASTIC at being hunter. Like he’s by far the best hunter out of all of them. If cap can get it done in under a minute, nobody lasts longer than 30 seconds for Childe. He looks like a damn maniac playing too, evilly laughing as he mows down all the harbingers. Even if they try their hardest to make him lose, HE WILL WIN.

[wiserebeltiger]

One thing Tim Dillon does not appreciate is that the psychology of the zoomer is fundamentally different from the psychology of the boomer. Tim always says “the zoomers will sell out like the boomers did in the 80s.” But he fails to understand that, while it is possible the zoomers may do something morally insane at some point, it will not take the form of simply selling out. Rather, it would come with the embrace of a demented Stalinism or such like psychosis. Zoomers have been “managed” by the boomers all their lives; they want power, not an electric guitar. They have been abused at a time when they are acutely aware that they are being abused; which creates anger and in some a desire for revenge. The boomers were crazy, like any generation; but their craziness was fundamentally a weak one; weakness for simple materialism, narcissism, etc. On the other hand, the generation that grew up not only being molested by priests but also groomed online and cyber bullied, had their body deformed because they weren’t allowed to transition, is mired (this is big) in 20k of student debt, pays ridiculously for rent, and has for company only other people who are similarly cracked and depraved—no; this generation will do very strange things. They will not merely lose touch with reality and let bad things happen. They will get what they want, what they deeply know they have been deprived of, or they will die profoundly and absurdly in the most unforeseen fit of mental illness.

Perhaps, as we get older, the mental illness in our generation will become less pronounced; or perhaps it will get worse. There seems to be a division, a significant historical divergence, that is now occurring between those who are mentally sorting themselves out, and those who fail to do so, and who seem bound to go off the deep end. These are the two tendencies in the zoomers—not so much left vs. right, though that is another division, but sane vs. insane; time will tell which will prevail.

We will see too, if we manage to make something new, or merely become the conduit for our parent’s rage and abuse, taken out on society, as the generation of the 30s and 40s took their parents’ WWI bitterness out on “enemies.” A deranged rage, really at the dead king, that they failed to move on from and instead became consumed by… from which detachment from reality followed.

The professional managerial class seems to be losing influence on the left; at least in public discourse and public sentiment. But in the organizations themselves, the DSA, the unions? I am not so sure. These people are really the worst gen z has to offer. They perfectly encapsulate this failed rebellion against the parent that winds up only fulfilling the parent’s vision (because the child never really wanted to rebel to begin with, because they have been so heavily managed that they do not know how).

The parents, managers, wanted to manage a neoliberal society; their children, whom they groomed to carry on in their footsteps, may wind up managing a democratic socialist society���the state agencies, the beaurocracies, are likely to be full of these people.

People say it’s ok to be rich and leftist. “You shouldn’t shit on someone who is rich and leftist.” But they bury the real fact: that you and working people should be very suspicious of anyone who is rich, and wants to take control of a worker’s organization. What do they want but control and a job; a little bit of power; a little bit of familiarity. The communist part of old, after all, ran internally like any corporation: you interviewed for an entry-level position, then worked your way up through the ranks, maybe to reach a post on the board of directors—sorry, the politburo. Beware the organizational forms that arise from failing to unlearn the ones you already exist in; otherwise you will never escape. [the second half of this paragraph is mostly wrong but I am too tired to edit it.]

[neptuniadoesstuff]

The Hyyders Squad!

Welp, I'm finally done with this. Yeh I literally made more of my frend Al's OCs into ASGD characters BCS I CAN!

Also them by themselves bcs frik u:

SOOOOOOO...... From left to right we HAVE! (I did update some of their names since the last time I introduced them fully.):

Gerald Lyconoth ((Dad of originally 1 but now is a dad of 2 after the 300 year permafrost. Is a very nervous nerd guy but does have some unspoken problems (based on his original self's Canon lore). Also the supposed leader of the Hyyders Squad. Mayhaps is 42? No one knows, his id just says hes 40+. A Earth Human.))

Joslyne Roregiz Shepard ((Angy lady who's was also a retired military officer but now lives with a old lady who she calls a boomer. Does not care whatsoever if she's hurting you, she's only a "bite first questions last" type of person. Basically the fighter of the squad but really thinks she the leader due to thinking Gerald is not actually capable to be a leader even though the squad is a... research team... Is 35. Also a Earth human but a bit unhinged.))

Triss Fallison ((Guy with low self esteem & may have a identity crisis every now & then (poor guy). Is oddly innocent & kinda doesn't know what is going on but he hold some pretty dark secrets only his adopted family knows. Is around 24 but his past still sometimes gets to him. Is one of newer members of the group & he is mainly the harvester & collector (although may have been threatened by Joslyne many times that she WILL use him as a meat shield so he is kinda scared of her). Jelly Boi but was raised by a Serpenskolk couple who is now trying to fit into human society.))

Dyan'nah Laemeria Kon'sai ((Old lady who for some reason has a major immunity to poisons & the effects of eating tainted food. Is a no bs person who is also tired of Joslyne's (her current roommate) rampant bs & wishes that lady who's like in her 30s stop acting like a child BECAUSE SHE KNOWS SHE WAS A MILITARY OFFICER! Is teh pharmacist/nurse of the group & often test the herbs that Triss brings in. May look like in her late 40s but is actually a lot older than that but due to mechanical science she looks pretty young by her standards. The last person of a now extinct race of exo-humans but she was born in a lab owned by Stellowbark.))

Yes this is in fact them. Now these guys do have a major role in ASGD bcs this main role happens to take place 300 years later (aka the time ASGD's storyline takes place) & yeh they are uh... on a icey planet bcs the kid of Gerald ACCIDENTALLY let out a frikin demonic being named Mesmer & now the planet they were researching about is now a icey horrorland.

Btw if you wanna see their squad logo uh.... its in the link under here:

So yeh, I hope you enjoy looking at this. ANYWAYS IMMA GO PUT THESE ON TH NOW & SEND THEM TO MY FREND AL-

Characters aren't mine, while designed by me, their colors ARE DIRECTLY BASED ON the Characters they're AUs of. (As they still belong to Al who is my frend)

Art: Mine.

Program: Ibispaint x

Bubs' TOS: Plz don't repost/steal, trace, or recolor my art WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! If you do, I'll take yur femur and pelvis.. SO, DON'T THINK ABOUT IT! (The PNS on my blog's pinned post clearly means "Please No Steal" plz follow that rule.) If you do post my art on anything like yur blog or somewhere else (With my permission) PLEASE CREDIT ME!

[mcu-multiverse-order-review]

Spider-Man - Season One (1967-1968)

And done so much quicker than I was expecting.

So this blog is supposed to be a list of things attached to the MCU, starting with this series, and honestly, I think my initial beliefs were right in all the MCU connections. The music, the pointing meme, and obviously Spider-Man himself all make appearances in season one of the show.

Review wise I can say that most of the show seems to be fine, enjoyable but some of it has aged like very, very old, sour milk.

Under the cut I’ve made a breakdown of every episode in season one, covering personal thoughts, recurring plotlines and important character introductions.

Just as a heads up, there is one episode (Episode 9a) that I honestly believe is just racist, I’ve marked that episode specifically with a content warning.

Episode 1a - “The Power of Dr. Octopus”

First thing to note, before the episode even starts properly, the theme song. It’s a bop and incredibly iconic to boot. I’m not going to be mentioning it as we continue with this series as it appears at the front of every single episode, but it’s good to start with.

Characters introduced:

Peter Parker / Spider-Man

And our main man of the hour, Peter Parker is the first face we see in this show. Apparently he’s supposed to be a teenager here, but I can’t see it; He looks and sounds like he’s in his 30s. Anyway, he quickly changes into Spider-Man at the beginning of the episode. This incarnation of Spider-Man is accurately quick-witted and honestly I can see why he’s the face of many classic memes.

Doctor Octopus

Never referred to by his actual name of Dr. Otto Octavius, but this is our first appearance of Doc Ock. He doesn’t have a very interesting design in this version, just wearing a blue jumpsuit, with his mechanical tentacles coming out of his sides.

J. Jonah Jameson

As expected, JJJ has graced us with his presence at the start of this adventure. The ol' brush-head comes with his signature boomer mentality and sheer hatred of Spider-Man.

Betty Brant

In more recent depictions, Betty Brant is a significantly minor character in the Spider-Man mythos, but she's the main female lead in this series. I by that I mean she's the only woman that appears for most of the show.

Episode 1b - “Sub-Zero for Spidey”

Firstly, Pluto’s not a planet, Parker, you should know this. Secondly, this seems seems like a good time to mention this show's goofy ass animation. Thirdly, the only new characters in this episode, Dr. Smartyr and the Plutonians, are original characters for this show, so they ain't relevant.

Episode 2a - “Where Crawls the Lizard”

Motherfucker just made a swamp boat out of webs. That is all.

Anyway this episode introduces some new characters to the mix, granted only one of them is actually important to the Spider-Man mythos as a whole, but let’s go through ‘em anyway.

Characters Introduced:

Dr. Curtis Conner / The Lizardman

Ok, so immediately if you’re a Spider-Man nerd some things may look off here. Yes his name is supposed to be Dr. Curt Connors, not Conner. Not once is the Lizard actually called “The Lizard”, he is almost exclusively referred to as “The Lizardman”. And Dr. Connors in this continuity very noticeably has both his arms, with the lizard formula being made to cure swamp fever rather than regrow limbs.

Grace Conner

Honestly, all I know about her is that she’s Curt’s wife and that her name in the main 616 continuity is Martha, not Grace. 

Billy Conner

Curt’s son. That is all I know about him.

Episode 2b - “Electro, the Human Lighting Bolt”

Would you look at that, Spider-Man behind a desk. What will he do? Become a meme apparently, or get shot at by Electro; depends on who you ask.

Also, I’m fucking sorry, did Pete just say he added asbestos to his web fluid. Bruh. This show sure knows how to show its age.

Anyway, this episode seems to be our first case of JJJ blaming Spider-Man for shit he didn’t do and having the police chase him; a common trope moving forward. It’s also the first appearance of the Spider-Tracer, although called the Electronic Spider Device in this episode.

Characters Introduced:

Electro

Good ol’ characterless Max Dillon makes his debut in this episode. This time Electro seems to be a thief that likes hanging out at carnivals, because I guess there’s nothing better for him to do.

Episode 3 - “The Menace of Mysterio”

Ah, the classic Mysterio story, framing Spider-Man for a robbery and then wanting to be seen “bringing him to justice”; you love to see it. Of course this plot comes with a healthy dose of the police and Jameson after Spidey too. But, I’m not gonna lie seeing JJJ actually getting his comeuppance at the end of the episode was very cathartic and funny,

Something of note during Mysterio and Spider-Man’s second confrontation in the film studio, Spidey declares that his powers are magical. This isn’t relevant to anything, just something strange I noticed.

Characters Introduced:

Joe / Mysterio

Ok, so who the fuck is “Joe” and why does he look like Namor the Submariner. Basically, he’s pretty much just Quentin Beck under a different name. But he is very much the classic Mysterio.

Episode 4a - “The Sky is Falling”

Did the Vulture fucking call Spider-Man a boob? Lol

Anyway, that was indeed an episode. I think I’m gonna start running out of things to say soon.

Characters Introduced:

The Vulture

So apparently this isn’t Adrian Toomes, but is instead a guy named Raniero "Blackie" Drago. I really fucking hope that nickname doesn’t have a racist origin, cos it has those vibes and I ain’t here for it. Bro has an infinity sized chin. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the Vulture actually controlling birds before.

Episode 4b - “Captured by J. Jonah Jameson”

Other than seeing triple J taking a more villainous role this episode, there’s nothing really of note.

Characters Introduced

Henry Smythe

Ok, so Henry Smythe is more or less the same as his 616 counterpart, Spencer Smythe. Ngl tho, the Spider Slayer in this episode looks hilarious in comparison to how I’m used to seeing it.

Episode 5a - “Never Step on a Scorpion”

Other than the obvious JJJ creates the Scorpion storyline, this episode also introduces Peter’s sheer incompetence in talking to women. It should also be noted that Jameson sounds more like a whiny bitch than usual in this episode.

Characters Introduced:

The Scorpion

Mac Gargan rears his ugly mug as the Scorpion, making his animated debut. Looks like he’s stoned out of mind on all close up shots. For some reason he roars like a constipated T. rex.

Dr. Farley Stillwell

Originally I had a sentence about how I was only including Stillwell as an important inclusion because I had heard of him once before, but I decided to redact it as they didn't seem fair. This character seems to have more to do than just be an occasional background character in the 616 continuity, so it would be a disservice to disregard him just because I'm ignorant to who he is.

Episode 5b - “Sands of Crime”

Yet another Spidey framed story. Literally nothing else of note really.

Characters Introduced:

Sandman

The Sandman, everyone’s favourite dream god… wait, no, wrong character. The Sandman, everyone’s favourite dusty thief, makes his debut in this episode. So I made some discoveries while researching for this episode. I went so long believing Sandman to be Flint Marko, but apparently that’s only in a few continuities. Sandman’s actual name is William Baker, who I thought was a separate guy this entire time. Like, yeah honestly believed there was two Sandmen.

Episode 6a - “Diet of Destruction”

“Walloping Web-Snappers!” is such a shit catchphrase. Anyway this episode brings us an original enemy that is never seen again (which they kept calling a monster, despite being very clearly a robot) and flying cars.

Episode 6b - “The Witching Hour”

So this episode finally introduces a few key aspects of Spider-Man.

Pete dipping out in the middle of a date. (Poor Betty)

On his eternal quest to legalise weed and do magic shit, Spider-Man's arch nemesis finally makes an appearance.

And for fuck sake, why does JJJ with Spidey and the Green Goblin are the same person. Man is legitimately stupid sometimes most of the time.

Characters Introduced:

Green Goblin

At last, Norman Osborn makes his grand entrance to the world of animation. Now, this may be a product of its time, but Goblin seems to be a lot more magic focused than I’m used to him being. Not really a problem, just something I noticed.

Episode 7a - “Kilowatt Kaper”

And here’s our first episode to feature a returning villain; this time it’s Electro up to no good. Other than that there is nothing else of note in this episode.

Episode 7b - “The Peril of Parafino”

Another episode with an original villain; but honestly if you had told me Parafino was a prototype for Cletus Kasady I’d believe you.

Episode 8 - “Horn of the Rhino”

Spider-Ball, thanks, I hate it.

Anyway, this episode is yet another one of Spider-Man getting blamed for shit he didn’t do. Only this time JJJ spends a night in lockup for trying to trespass onto military grounds. What a dumbarse.

Characters Introduced:

Aunt May

May Parker makes her long awaited appearance. As expected she holds a caring position over Peter, but still holds onto JJJ’s anti-Spider-Man rhetoric. Honestly, it’s good to finally see her.

Rhino

Aleksei Sytsevich, sounding less Russian than expected, makes his animated debut in this extended episode. Why the Rhino gets a full 20 minutes and Doc Ock & Green Goblin only getting 10 minute slots is honestly beyond me.

Episode 9a - “The One-Eyed Idol”

CW: Racism

So, we learned both Pete and Betty are racist, that’s just really not cool. Seriously, I’m pretty sure this is the first time we actually see a black character in this show and he gets called both a monster and a dog. The fuck. Like, I know this show is old, but bloody hell, this is some very, very poorly aged milk.

I was gonna make a joke about JJJ getting hypnotised again, but now I just don’t feel like it. Mood’s dead.

Episode 9b - “Fifth Avenue Phantom”

This episode features a freak that uses android mannequins to steal shit and turn things into toys, I think. Literally nothing of any actual note.

Episode 10a - “The Revenge of Dr. Magneto”

Yet another meme for the collection: Peter Parker reading a book.

Anyway this episode adds fuck all to the greater list. “But wait!” I hear you say, “Isn’t Magneto in this episode? He’s in the title.” Unfortunately not, Dr. Matto Magneto has no relation to the actual Magneto. Sorry Erik, your time will have to come later.

Episode 10b - “The Sinister Prime Minister”

Another episode of stuff that happens. Anyway the only important part of this episode is…

Character Introductions:

Charles Cameo / The Imposter

“Teri, who the fuck is this and why are you bringing attention to them?” Because Charles Cameo is the 60s Spider-Man incarnation of Dmitri Smerdyakov, The Chameleon.  Now Chameleon’s first comic debut does pre-date the show, so I do wonder why they didn’t just use Dmitri, but eh whatever, I’m counting it.

Episode 11a - “The Night of the Villains”

Ah yes, the return of Parafino, because he was just so memorable the first time. Seriously, for the show's second returning villain, you’d think they’d pick someone with an actual stage presence.

Episode 11b - “Here Comes Trubble”

I’ll be completely honest, I was more focused on hatching pokémon eggs than actually watching the episode, which is fine cause bugger all happened anyway.

Episode 12a - “Spider-Man Meets Doctor Noah Boddy”

How many times can someone get bailed out of lock up before that just stops working? I’m just curious as JJJ getting permanent prison time would’ve been funny.

Episode 12b - “The Fantastic Fakir”

Since when were webbing and rope snakes? Also did Spidey just fucking killed a guy by opening a door. 

Unlike Episode 9a, I’m not gonna call this episode overtly racist, I’m just gonna heavily imply it. But in all honesty, I really doubt a single Saudi Arabian person was involved in the making of this. It just had some really not good vibes.

Episode 13a - “Return of the Flying Dutchman”

So Mysterio’s back in this episode, and for some reason he has decided to be a pirate, because of course he has. Much more importantly Pete fucking with JJJ at the end of the episode is honestly just great.

Episode 13b - “Farewell Performance”

Mostly forgettable honestly, but it is nice watching Spidey outsmart JJJ again.

Episode 14a - “The Golden Rhino”

Rhino’s back but this time instead of destroying the world, for some reason his plan is to make a solid gold statue of himself. Priorities, I guess. Anyway, add this episode to the list of JJJ blaming Spider-Man for shit he didn’t do.

Episode 14b - “Blueprint for Crime”

Ok, so I get Pete’s plan in this episode was to draw the Enforcers out by framing himself, but that then started to get JJJ to question how Pete gets photos of Spider-Man. If this show actually had a plot I’m sure that would come up later. Anyway, this episode has three villains, the main one, The Plotter, I’m pretty sure is original to the show, the other two however…

Character Introductions:

Cowboy & Ox (The Enforcers)

Jackson Brice, usually called Montana but referred to as Cowboy in this, and Raymond Bloch, the Ox, are a criminal team known as The Enforcers. They make their animated debut here. I personally don’t know much about them other than Montana doesn’t stay as Montana in a show I plan to get to much later. (I’m very excited to get to it tho)

Episode 15a - “The Spider and the Fly”

I’ll be honest, the most interesting thing from this episode is what the Flys actual names are: Stan & Lee Patterson. Get it? Stan Lee. Hilarious. I am positively pissing myself with laughter (Written with a face that can only be described as -_- )

Episode 15b - “The Slippery Doctor Von Schlick”

I am running out of things to say on episodes that don't do shit.

Episode 16a - “The Vulture’s Prey”

So, The Vulture and his enormous chin have returned to bully Jameson. I am ok with this. And to be completely fair, the ending with Spidey refusing to help JJJ without saying “please” was actually funny, in my opinion.

Episode 16b - “The Dark Terrors”

The Fifth Avenue Phantom returns to play with shadows, how cute.

Episode 17a - “The Terrible Triumph of Dr. Octopus”

Hooray, Doc Ock is back. With a new voice, I think. Oh yeah, that scientist that spoke with the ice guys, yeah he’s also back, but he’s much less important. And oh goodie, a “spiders aren’t insects” joke, I’m surprised it’s taken this long.

So many episodes in and honestly Octavius seems to be the only villain in the show that is actually threatening. Like, the show butchers almost everyone in characterisation, but Ock is portrayed really well here, actively outsmarting Spider-Man for most of the episode only for his downfall to be his own hubris.

Episode 17b - “Magic Malice”

What’s this? A double whammy of Spidey’s greatest foes?! Green Goblin is back, and I just noticed the length of his eyelashes, like girl you gotta tell me where you get those done, or at least what type of mascara you use, cos I’m jealous.

Not gonna lie, it’s funny watching the Green Goblin stoop to money and jewellery theft knowing how rich Norman Osborn is in literally every other continuity. 

Also he just took an axe to the arse and his only response is “ouch”. Not important, I just thought that was funny.

Notice how I have more to say with villains like Goblin and Ock. It’s almost as if they’re just inherently more interesting. 

Episode 18a - “Fountain of Terror”

First of all, the main villain from that racist episode is back, thankfully didn’t look like he brought that shit with him. More importantly Dr. Connors is back, and surprisingly not the Lizard. It's good to see Connors out of being a reptile.

Episode 18b - “Fiddler on the Loose”

The villain of this episode is called the Fiddler. Just take that in for a moment.

That is the worst villain name I have ever heard. I originally had a joke written here, but I decided not to and leave the joke to your imagination.

Episode 19a - “To Catch a Spider”

Me and the boys forming the Sinister Six Fearsome Four Spider-Catchers.

Anyway, this episode brings Dr. Noah Boddy back to break Vulture, Electro, & Green Goblin out of prison. Together they form the Spider-Catchers. But as always with the Sinister-Six adjacent they also fall apart due to infighting, granted this time it was caused mostly by Pete knowing how to do voice impersonations, for some reason.

Episode 19b - “Double Identity”

Eureka! The pointing meme! I have found it.

Anyway it’s a standard Chameleon plot, using recognisable faces to steal shit.

Episode 20a - “Sting of the Scorpion”

Ok, what the fuck happened to Pete here? His everything is broken.

Also Scorpion becomes a kaiju in this episode, so that was pretty neat.

Episode 20b - “Trick or Treachery”

Another Spidey framed plot, this time orchestrated by the Fly twins.

[stephenjaymorrisblog]

Interview of a Lost Soul

(The Chaya Raichik interview)

Stephen Jay Morris

2/27/2024

©Scientific Morality

How do you know when someone is a liar? When they call other people liars. Meet Chaya Raichik, brainchild of Libs of Tik Tok. She has this obsession with attacking hermaphrodites, transgender, and other human oddities; just like Matt Walsh and Candace Owens, who believe that public schools are indoctrinating innocent children into sexual perversion. Do they have proof?  Why should they provide proof when 30% of Americans are gullible suckers!?

Teachers brainwashing young kids? There is no evidence of this. If there was, and it was on some phone camera, groups like Project Veritas would creatively edit it and make it look like an actual crime was committed. There are no photos, audio recordings, or witnesses. Jesus! The John Birch Society accused public schools of indoctrinating kids into becoming communists. Now, in the 21st Century, we have a circus of conspiratorial delusions. At least left-wing conspiracy theories had a modicum of arguments and plausible theories. But QAnon? They just make shit up, like someone who has been smoking weed all night.

One of the many imbecilic conspiracy theories concerns transgender people. The primary job of the authoritarian right is to scare people. They succeeded minutely with this one, but the rest of the public thinks they are nuts.

Libs of Tik Tok have posts on social media that depict trans people like characters of 1950’s, drive-in theater, monster movies. Instead of giving compassion to the emotionally vulnerable, they mock these underage transpeople the same way Jesus was mocked when he was carrying the cross and bleeding from his wounds on the way to his crucifixion. Too much? You can see Israeli soldiers on Tik Tok mocking the dead children of Gaza. In so doing, they spew more Anti-Semitic ammunition about evil Jews.

I have said in previous post that Jews are like everybody else. I do know this: in a nation that is predominately white, there are some Jews who sorely want to be accepted by that society. How do they try to accomplish this? By attacking their own people. Just like Candence Owens, who attacks her fellow black people. If you want to make money and get attention, attack your own people and The Daily Wire will give you a podcast.

So, who is this Chaya Raichik Zoomer anyway? I’ve heard rumors about her. One, that she comes from an Orthodox Jewish family. Two, she is from Brooklyn, New York. And three, she is Putin’s personal secretary. NOT true! I can make shit up, too! She is not articulate; she talks like someone who is on barbiturates. She doesn’t have an accent. She projects a paranoid personality, and she wears a 1969 hippie hair style. During her recent interview with Taylor Lorenz, she kept looking around the local area like she was expecting an assassination attempt upon her.

So, who is Taylor Lorenz? She is a reporter from the Washington Post. She has the composure of a Tupperware representative. She could sell Tupperware to Boomer women, but interviewing a right-wing mental case? Forget about it. First, when interviewing subjects, you do not let them ask questions of you. YOU are interviewing THEM; they are not interviewing you. Now, Chaya is a hard nut to crack. She is secretive, condescending, humorless, and stoic. It appears she is symptomatic of a sociopath. She also has a persecution complex. She refuses to answer questions because they are “personal.” I’m surprised she didn’t evoke the Fifth Amendment. Taylor asked her how she got into politics. She answered, “Oh, it was the Covid thing. You know? The government telling you what to do! When to shop or forcing you to wear a mask!” That is solid proof right there that she is dumb! The CDC recommended wearing facemasks in public, it did not mandate it. It was private businesses and heath institutions that were requiring patrons to wear masks. It was NOT Uncle Sam.

So, the whole interview was a waste of time. I wish she had been cross-examined by a rough Jewish lawyer in a court room. Interviewing her was like interviewing a tortoise shell.

This is fair warning:  if you want to be famous and rich, avoid being a conservative activist. You remember Wally George? Of course you don’t.

Lorenz asked Raichik how much money she makes. She answered, “That is a personal question.” Whenever someone refuses to answer that question, that means their piggy bank is empty. Now, if asked whether she has a boyfriend, she would likely say, “None of your business!” And that would mean—like are most Millennials and Zoomers—she’s probably a female Incel.

What a sorry world we live in!

[dalyntha]

Howie Mandel, a meager and unassuming opinion

The other day I posted about “Deal or No Deal Island”, and during the course of that post I explained the basics of the original “Deal or No Deal” show. I of course mentioned the host, Howie Mandel. Why would you shorten Howard to Howie? Howard really is an awful name, but Howie sounds juvenile.

According to the many (one) source, HM was born in 1955. That means he is 69 years old this year. (Stoo snickering). I have a hard time believing it, but he’s older than my parents.

He’s old enough to vividly remember the civil rights movement, a handful of wars (that we know about 👀) and like, a crap ton of other important stuff. He was 30 ish when the Berlin Wall fell. It may not seem like that big of a deal, I mean, there’s a lot of people that age, I mean, come on, the “boomers”. AKA my grandparents generation had little to no self control and/or birth control.

It’s just, Howie does not look like he’s about to ding 70. There’s a handful of celebrities that have really aged well, that’s another post. But Howie is - different. I think, and I could be wrong, that Howie Mandel is indeed an extraterrestrial being. This is why, I’m sure many of my readers noticed, I called him a creature. I can’t definitively say he’s an alien but he is a creature. Now, if you have seen the stage of the “Deal or No Deal” show, it’s lit up, and like, for sure a space ship deconstructed into the stage. Howie lives deep beneath the ship/stage, in quarters that “NBC” Has provided for him, in addition to many other forms of payment, because Howie requires intense medical care. Not used to the germs that humans carry, his weak alien immune system (well from our point of view, I mean, it could be that he also can’t handle our atmosphere yet he persists…just suffers for it by being almost paralyzed by common human germs. His people have cleverly covered this up by having him tell everyone that he suffers from OCD, and more specifically, he is a germophobe. Putting him in harms way every time he did a show by letting middle aged women hug him and good ol boys grab his hand for a handshake. Doctors here have struggled to adapt our medicine to treat him, but thanks to the profits of the game show, they are able to provide him every effort.

I won’t go into his career much other than to say that he apparently voiced Gizmo from “Gremlins”. That was a pretty cute little thing until it’s fur melted into a slick acidic mess of a monster. It didn’t terrify me as a child (i think i was 5 when it was in theaters, i wanted to go and my mom said no) but it did really piss me off to have the cute thing do that.

Pretty sure HM has done a lot of stand up comedy, interviews, and of course AGT. It’s all to keep his cover, any platform where he can comedically display his humanity, that’s where he is.

I don’t think anyone knows what his real motives are. Are there more like him? Will they come here in more game show ready space ships? I mentioned his youthful appearance, and of course this will eventually catch up with him, unless him or his people…have already planned our convenient end before then?

I’ll leave you with that, dear reader. Will be come for you? Will you hear a constant gentle rapping, rapping at your chamber door?

“Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from offmy door!”

Quoth the Raven, “Deal…..or no deal??”

@twig-gy

[lilith-vodkaaunt-of-demons]

Adding some stuff just because:

Sometimes Babies will just...stop breathing. This is actually normal, and they'll either start breathing, or pass out and start breathing. This is also normal. That being said, an unnecessary hospital bill is always better than a small casket bill.

If you feel like your doctor isn't taking you seriously, get a second opinion. This is more for younger parents and parents who LOOK young. Unfortunately, there will be doctors who don't take you seriously just because you either are young, or look young, so they don't think you know what you're talking about. Find another doctor. My older brother's pediatrician when he was an infant almost killed him because they wouldn't listen to my mom when she said she was sure he was allergic to milk. For refence to how impacted his sinuses were, they new Pediatrician did an x-ray and couldn't find them. It took several months for them to clear out.

A lot of Older People (e.g. Boomers and older) will give you advice genuinely trying to help, but ALWAYS double check it. There has been a lot of development specifically in Baby Medicine in the last 30 years. My grandma was giving my Uncle cereal at SIX WEEKS because his Pediatrician told her if he could keep it down, why not.

You aren't a terrible parent for hating the sound of your baby crying, that's actually how it's supposed to work. Your brain is wired to hate the sound of a crying baby so you'll do whatever is necessary to stop it. That being said, sometimes a baby will cry just because. You have to remember that they are experiencing everything for the first time, so every thing is literally the best and the worst thing they've ever experienced.

Baby Fragility is a paradox. Shrodinger's Fragility. They are both very fragile, and also super rubbery.

Infants don't just WANT attention, they NEED attention, or they can die, kind of like rabbits. Skin-to-skin contact and playing are necessities, not luxuries. (Frankly, I think this never stops being true, but specifically for babies in this case.)

seeing a lot of videos that are like “I didn’t know babies couldn’t have water” so here’s an incomplete list of things you need to know before having a baby

- the obvious, they can’t have water bc milk is incredibly high in water already so excess water leads to over hydration

- babies cannot have honey until 1

- if ur breastfeeding your kid and saving excess milk, make sure you label what you pumped in the morning vs at night bc your body produces different melatonin levels throughout the day and giving your baby daytime milk at night can make them more alert and fuck up their sleep schedule

- idk why ppl keep saying this but swaddling your babies or getting them those baby straight jacket things is not abuse. It chills them out cuz it reminds them of the womb

- babies have a dandruff like buildup on their head called cradle cap, and it’s very easy to deal with and remove with just some baby shampoo, a gentle scrub brush (MADE FOR BABIES!!) and a comb. It does need to be removed tho cuz it can be very painful after a while. This can also continue to happen late into toddlerhood it’s normal

- you have to clean out the creases of your baby’s skin and hands and feet they WILL collect dust😭😭

- you cannot bathe your baby until their umbilical cord naturally falls off. Use a warm damp rag until then

- tummy time is actually very important

- your baby might have a misshapen head at first (not all the time but sometimes) this will either sort itself out or they’ll need a corrective helmet ask your doctor

- I wouldn’t recommend having your baby leave the house very much until they’re at least 6 months old, especially if they’re born near cold and flu season cuz the common cold can kill a newborn

- you’re not an awful horrible person for having postpartum depression and it’s always a million times better to let your baby cry a few minutes longer than normal while you regain your composure than to freak out and give ur kid shaken baby syndrome

- you’re not an awful horrible person for giving your baby formula milk either

- don’t put shoes on your baby it’ll compromise their toe box and balance

- babies put every single thing in their mouths

- the easiest way to burp a baby is to hold them straight up (spine straight) and hold their head a bit higher

- always support their head they barely have necks

- if your baby fights away food, fights tummy time, vomits every single time you burp them, is gaining or losing an unreasonable amount of weight at a time, wheezes after eating, or goes red after eating, chances are they’re probably allergic to the type of milk they’re eating (again ask a doctor but these are just some signs it’s not just colic)

- they will wobble a lot when learning to do things but you gotta fight the urge to help them every single time cuz they gotta learn

- they’re not always spitting out baby food cuz they don’t like it they just don’t know how to eat. Like they don’t know how to push food down they only know how to stick their tongue out so be patient

- babies craniums are broken up into three parts at first that later fuse together, this is to help make birthing easier but it results in a small EXTREMELY sensitive spot in the top of their head that has no protection. This puts their brain at a high risk. Always protect their soft spot

- read to your baby!! Get cute bright colorful sensory books with sight words and read them to your baby it makes such a huge difference in their educational growth and will help them acquire a love for reading early on. And talk to them never shut up just say whatever comes to mind all the time this will strengthen their vocabulary growth also.

- babies poop like a lot. A lot. an unreasonable amount. Bring back up clothes and more diapers than you think

- no pillows or stuffies in the crib and only use a muslin blanket unless it’s especially cold to prevent suffocation

- babies kick reflexively until they’re out of their newborn scrunch (they stay womb shaped for a while) and if your baby is crying and pushing at the swaddle try letting them flail around for a minute

- consoling your baby is not spoiling them ! They need comfort and they will learn to self soothe on their own

- singing lullabies actually works, they can recognize your voice a consistent place of comfort from the womb and the cadence of lullabies is literally engineered to create a calm headspace

- for the love of god do not get boring ass beige toys. Colors are important for their neurological development

- babies are very responsive to praise from a young age so be as supportive of them as you can

- babies get constipated a lot and you have to do like tummy massages to help ease their pain the easiest way is to lay them on their backs and hold one foot in each hand, kick their feet like bicycles, scrunch up, and then stretch their legs out

- holding them on your hip too much will not cause bow legged-ness if your baby is bow legged that was always gonna happen

- they drool so so much and you have to get bibs for them so they don’t get chest eczema

- don’t use scented products on their skin cuz their skin is sooo much thinner than ours

- when your baby first starts sitting on their own never walk away from them without setting up a nest of pillows and blankets around them. Even minor head trauma can mess them up sometimes

- this one is kinda morbid and scary but sometimes babies just die out of nowhere and it’s no one’s fault or anything it’s called sudden infantile death syndrome(SIDS) and it’s about 1.3k deaths on average per year in America so not super common but still very real. 90% of these deaths happen during the first four months however edit: apparently it’s bc of an enzyme deficiency which at the very least you can take steps to try and prevent

- smoking and drinking during pregnancy WILL affect your baby and your breast milk and also might contribute to SIDS cases

- babies sometimes have a big red mark on them somewhere called a stork bite immediately after birth but typically it goes away

- babies can’t see very well for a while after birth and they’re VERY wobbly so they’ll typically bonk their head into your chest and face a lot while trying to support themselves

- female babies might have smth similar to a period the first few days after birth, this is because of the hormone transfer that happens during the birthing process and the days leading up to it

- male babies get random erections for the first few days after birth(hormone transfer again) literally do not be weird about this it’s a baby

- things like weaning your baby onto solid foods, potty training, weaning off pacifiers etc, can actually be directed by the baby and will happen naturally will minimal guidance from the parent(some guidance is still necessary) although I would do individual research into baby led weaning for food to prevent choking

- get those chewy feeding pouches to help with weaning

- the most random things will scare the hell out of your baby don’t take it personal 😭

- baby carriers are life savers (tulas are one of my favorites)

- once babies hit toddlerhood they’re tougher than you think, and a lot of their reaction is based on YOURS. they’re always going to be looking to you for how to react to a situation. Remain calm and if they’re ok they’ll calm down but if they’re genuinely hurt they’ll keep crying

- babies will most likely get ridiculously attached to an inanimate object and you have to keep this thing intact at all costs until they’re old enough to abandon it or they will throw a FIT. I got a lemur plushie from a zoo once and every single one of the kids has bonded their soul with it until about 6 years old and once a month I have to stitch him back up

- don’t compare yourself to other parents. Maybe your kid isnt getting grass fed wild caught north Atlantic cheerios but at least they’re fed. If your kid is alive and healthy and happy you’re doing a good job

- you will need 3 car seats, an infant seat, a grow with me toddler seat, and a booster seat

- getting a good diaper bag is a MUST

- the hair a baby is born with will most likely all fall out or they’ll get a bald spot on the back of their head where they sleep cuz their hair is so fragile and thin but once it grows back it grows back thick

- get like 20 muslin blankets so you always have a backup when the main ones are covered in spit up

- the babies grip IS stronger than yours (keep your hair up and keep pets away best you can)

- your best bet for your teething baby is a pacifier you can put your finger in so you can massage their gums and some chewing toys numbing cream can be dangerous and should be used sparingly

- go ahead and come to terms with the fact you’re gonna have to use a Frida Baby to manually remove snot

- babies can get hair and thread wrapped around their toes and fingers that can cut off their circulation try to make a habit of checking

- don’t hit your kid please it’s nothing but trauma and fucked up coping mechanisms from there pls empathize with your child they’re a person too

- be careful not to pull too hard on their arms and legs(like during play or holding their hand while they walk) and NEVER pick them up by their hands this will very easily cause dislocation

- they might have a little tooth like callous on their lip from their pacifier. This does not hurt them and it will go away but it may hurt during breastfeeding

- breastfeeding will make your boobs different sizes

Yeag that’s all I can think of rn but yk i Will add as I remember stuff ppl are also adding things I forgot in the tags in case you’d like to look thru that as well <3