#do these 1:30 am ramblings make sense ?

[atzhrts]

　　 ⠀˖　⠀˙⠀　｡ thank you guys so much for 3k ⠀˖　⠀˙⠀　｡　⠀

⠀⠀⠀ᯓ★ ⠀⠀⠀ i am genuinely so thankful !! thank you to everyone who reads my stuff and an even bigger thank you to everyone who sends in their thoughts - without you this blog would not even work <3 && thank you to all my moots and everyone who likes who reblogs my stuff - love you

　 ・ෆ・ to celebrate i want to do a little prompt list event - feel free send in a prompt, member of zerobaseone, ateez or riize and wether you want it as a text prompt or written!! ( if the prompt would make sense as a text ) - i will keep the requests for this open till the 13th ・ෆ・

prompts ⠀ ⠀ 🦢🩰 please use the numbers to request

　　 　 　ways to say “ i love you “ ⠀: ・┈ ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ :

⠀˖’ you know i love you, right ?’ (1)

⠀˖’ you met my mum ‘ (2)

⠀˖’ i can’t think of anyone else i’d want to be here with ‘ (3)

⠀˖’ we’ll figure it out together, we always do ‘ (4)

⠀˖’ i want to stare at the stars with you ‘ (5)

⠀˖’ it’s you, it’s always been you ‘ (6)

⠀˖’ you’re everything i’ve ever dreamed of ‘ (7)

⠀˖’ i’m not leaving you like this, i care about you ‘ (8)

⠀˖’ i care about you, i want the best for you ‘ (9)

⠀˖ letting you ramble about your day, listening with a small smile (10)

　　 　 　・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ friends to lovers/ beginning of a relationship

⠀˖’ you mean more to me than that ‘ (11)

⠀˖’ you look - uh, good. you look really good ‘ (12)

⠀˖ ‘are you blushing?’ ‘ i can’t help it if you look at me like that ‘ (13)

⠀˖ ‘ you, uhh... you... sorry. i didn't mean to make you... I mean... ‘ (14)

⠀˖ ‘ you’re blushing ‘ ‘ so are you ‘ (15)

⠀˖ ‘ can i kiss you, please? ‘ (16)

⠀˖ ‘ i didn't like the way they were looking at you. i hope you can understand what l'm trying to say ‘ (17)

⠀˖ * meeting each other's friends/family - ‘ i'm nervous ‘ ‘ don't be. i'm sure they'll like you. hell, they'll love you. ‘ (18)

⠀˖ walking next to each other, the back of your fingers touching theirs, too shy to initiate hand holding (19)

⠀˖ playing with your hair, being too shy to make eye contact (20)

⠀˖ covering cornered edges when you bent down (21)

⠀˖ hesitant smile and blushy cheeks (22)

⠀˖ learning about your body insecurities and finding out it’s their favorite part of you (23)

⠀˖ feathery forehead kisses (24)

⠀˖ late nights cuddled up and quiet giggles (25)

⠀˖ turning your head to hide your blush but he doesn’t let him (26)

⠀˖ smiling fondly when he sees you blushing, pulling you into his chest so you can hide it (27)

⠀˖ comparing hand sizes (28)

　　 　 　smut ⠀: ・┈ ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ :

⠀˖ ‘ that's it, fuck, that's a good girl/boy.’ (29)

⠀˖ ‘ you’re mine ‘ (30)

⠀˖ ‘ is this okay? ‘ as he stares up from between your legs (31)

⠀˖ ‘ do that again- shit, just like that, right there ‘ (32)

⠀˖ ‘ please mark me, i want everyone to know i'm yours ‘ (33)

⠀˖ ‘ on your knees ‘ while their fingers thread through your hair, guiding you onto the floor (34)

⠀˖ ‘ my little slut to ruin ‘ (35)

⠀˖ ‘ you're in no position to tease baby, remember that ‘ (36)

⠀˖ fucking someone so good that they struggle to kiss you back (37)

⠀˖ interlocking your fingers above your head while making out passionately (38)

⠀˖ pulling them closer by the collar of their shirt or their belt (39)

⠀˖ fucking you so good that you struggle to kiss you back (40)

⠀˖ sex in front of a big window where anyone could glance up and spot you (41)

⠀˖ fully clothed x stark naked (42)

⠀˖ finding your sex toy/toys and making you play with it in front of them (43)

⠀˖ quickie where you don't take any clothes off, just tug and pull and expose the essentials (44)

⠀˖ fucking, but one is still trying to keep all of their attention on the game they are playing (45)

⠀˖ seeing the love marks they left on their partner later and getting turned on all over again remember how it got there in the first place (46)

　　 　 　・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ prompt credits/ most are slightly altered : @angelilacs @novelbear @distort-ted @thepromptswhisperer @prompt-heaven @creativepromptsforwriting @loveisanimaginarydagger3000 @me-writes-prompts

[wanderingsoul6261]

Credit for gif goes to saw-×

I'm not really sure I like this. I'm in a writing funk right now, it seems. Edited it to the best of my ability at 1:30 am. I have more ideas coming out for this man, like another part of the x Tailor!Reader series.

This is a two in one. Got two requests that I felt I could put into one piece of writing. Like I said, I'm not sure I like it, so I might end up rewriting it or something. Time is just difficult between work and college.

Warnings: none that I can think of other than implied sex.

She sat outside, her feet dangling in the pool, moving back and forth gently, watching the ripples moved through the water. The sun beat down on her, but it wasn't hot, a soft breeze moving through the air making the day bearable, and maybe the only bearable thing all week. 

Her hands were settled in her lap, the ends of her summer dress fluttering slightly in the breeze, her hair following the same motion. 

James watched her for several moments, stepping out of the back patio doors of her home. The light chatter of her parents could be heard inside, providing an added sense of domesticity to the moment. 

I love you. 

The words almost came tumbling out of his mouth. Know one had been good enough for her, treating her as if she was a waste, the second best that wasn't even that. His heart thundered against his chest, threatening to blow through his chest as he finally took a step towards her. 

She startled, twisting around to look at him as his feet scraped against the cement around the pool.

“Sorry.” He spoke softly, as if speaking too loud would ruin the moment, as if it ever could. She visibly relaxed and he watched as she slouched slightly, watching him as he moved to take a seat next to her. 

It was silent. Crickets starting coming out as the sun set and the moon started it's adventure across the sky, the light from the manor behind them the only light source. The two of them sat shoulder to shoulder, the only sound being their breathing as they took in the presence of each other. 

He waited for her, not wanting to push, wanting her to talk about the guy that broke her heart once more, leaving others to pick up the pieces. James was mad at the way he treated her, always forgetting that she was there, leaving her on the sidelines when she should have been with him in the game. James had always known he would never treat her like that.

“Am I the problem?” His heart shattered. He snapped his gaze towards her, eyes wide as she looked at him with doe eyes. Oh how he loved her eyes, grateful that he had them in his life. 

“What- no. Of course you aren’t the problem.” He exclaimed. “You could never be the problem.” Her name fell from his lips as a sigh. “We never know why people do the things They do. But I know you didn't deserve it. No one deserves what has happened to you. Someone will Come around eventually and want to devote their entire being just to make you happy.” 

Like me. 

He thought to himself, and as she leaned against him, her head resting on his shoulder, he knew would want to do just that. But there was a risk, and he couldn't lose her entirely if the relationship were to ever fail. So he would sit and watch from the sidelines, loving her from a distance. 

—---

“James!” 

His turned around to see her, excitement in her eyes as she rushed over to him. Several others in the hallways gave her looks, but the two of them were two focused on each other to really care. 

A small smile slowly made its way to his face, her name falling from his lips as she neared him, coming into earshot. 

“Heard that your parents are out of town. You and Lydia can come over. We can hang out! Mom and dad will be home, but they already said it’s okay.” James took in her excitement, the corner of his eyes crinkling as he watched her ramble. 

“We’ll be there.” He said, stepping in, before she spoke too much and forgot what she was asking. She paused, taking in her words, and his eyes moved over her face, taking in her excitement and the way her eyes twinkled as she spoke to him. It was hard to believe that a few months ago she had her heart broken. 

The two started to walk shoulder to shoulder down the hallway to their next class, which just happened to be with each other. Her voice was music to his ears as she spoke to him, going on about what the three of them could do. Movies were brought up, with popcorn of course, although she didn’t fail to mention that she might read a book at some point, or have her sketchbook and paints littering the room as the movies played. 

He didn’t care though and neither did Lydia. Hanging out with her was a breath of fresh air, because while her parents definitely had money, they didn’t let it speak for them like many others at Maxton Hall. The family was true to themselves, and it was a nice change amongst the others. 

“Do you want me to talk to Lydia, or should I?” She asked. James tilted his head in her direction, thinking for several moments before he answered. 

“I’ll talk to her. Don’t worry that pretty head of yours.” James said, and he could have sworn that her face blushed slightly before she looked away from him, her lips curling into a smile. “Is there anything that you want us to bring?” He asked, his eyes remaining on her. 

The two of them continued to take steps closer to their next class, but moved slightly slower than the rest of the students rushing past them. They reveled in the company of the other, enjoying each other’s presence better than others around them. 

“Nope.” She said, looking up at him. “I got it all handled. You guys just bring yourselves. Not too hard is it?” She asked. James shook his head, his gaze stuck with hers as they finally walked into their next class. She flashed him another smile, his heart soaring into his throat, threatening to choke him as his steps faltered. 

He needed to remain on the sidelines though, but as the night came to exist and he watched her instead of watching the movie, reading her book or sketching, her legs draped over his legs while Lydia lounged on a bean bag, it was becoming more and more difficult. 

———-

He couldn’t remain on the sidelines any longer. It was becoming harder for James to keep himself in check as she continued to talk to other guys. It had been a year since her last break up, and she felt comfortable enough to talk to another again. 

Which led them to where they are now. 

James stood against a wall, watching her from a distance as she smiled and laughed at something that another student from Maxton Hall told her. It looked genuine, and her eyes held that twinkle that they had been void of for so long. 

James clenched his jaw as he watched the two converse with each other, his knuckles growing white as he clenched the glass in his hands. 

“Jealousy doesn’t look good on you, James.” Alistair came to stand next to James, looking over at his friend briefly before his gaze moved to where she stood with the other guy. The two watched as her gaze slipped past the guy, catching sight of the two friends. Her smile had grown impossibly wider before she turned her attention back to the one before, but her smile wasn’t as big this time. 

“I don’t want to get in the way of her happiness.” James said, knowing well enough that Alistair knew about his feelings for her. “And that’s exactly what I’d be doing if I confessed. There is too much at risk Alistair.” 

“She feels the same way. You should see the way she looks at you when you aren’t looking.” James turned back to his friend, caught slightly off guard. There was no way she felt the same way. 

“There is no way.” 

“You are just too blind and oblivious. 

“I know what’s in front of my face when I see it.” Alistair only scoffed. 

“Keep lying to yourself. But I firmly believe that you need to talk to her, and soon, because you might not have that chance for long.” His friend patted his back, leaving him to sulk behind himself, a half empty glass of champagne in his hand. James turned his attention back to her, finding her already staring at him and the umpteenth time since he had known her, his heart threatened to pound out of his chest, his throat going dry as he watched her. The palm of his hands grew sweaty, wiping his one hand on his slacks, before switching his glass into his other hand and repeating the motion. 

He was always so calm and collected, so organized, but she had the power to unravel him and do it with little to no effort. 

James watched as she politely excused herself from her current conversation, and had taken the look on his face as an invite to walk over to him. He licked his lips, watching as she neared him, his heart starting to thud against his chest, and as she finally reached him, chest pressed almost together, James knew that he wasn’t going to hold back anymore. He was done with the sidelines. He was done watching.  All he wanted to do now was run the game by her side. 

So he set his glass of champagne down on the nearest flat surface. He turned his attention back to her and set one hand gingerly on her cheek, the other on her waist, before he dipped his head down and swallowed her lips into a kiss, knowing without a doubt that she could probably feel his heart threaten to beat out of his chest. 

———

“Will you marry me?”

He couldn’t help it when the words slipped out of his mouth. James laid with her in bed, their bodies bare and covered with marks made in coital bliss. His hand skimmed down her waist, stopping on her thigh and drawing small shapes into the small skin. 

She seemed better relaxed than at the start of the encounter, and knowing that it was her first time, James did everything he could to make her comfortable. He couldn’t ever think about doing anything in any other way, not when he loved her so much. 

She froze, but the smile remained on her face. 

“What?” She asked. James swallowed, his body growing hot with anxiety, sweating, even if the blankets only covered a small portion of his body. 

“Marry me.” He said, furrowed his brows, and then corrected himself. “Will you marry me? Please?” Her smile turned into a grin. 

“No fancy plan?” She asked, and he was relieved when she didn’t say no, but he had yet to receive a yes. 

“I did, but I- the moment.” He paused, struggling to find a better way. “I don’t need some fancy plan to propose to you. Plus I don’t have a ring. It just came out and I might have made a joke out of it, but then I didn’t want to. I want to marry you.” She gazed up at him with an easy smile, eyes crinkled and dimples showing. 

“Yes, I’ll marry you.” She responded. James surged forward at her answer, his lips pressing kiss after kiss over her face, her name and ‘I love yous’ falling from his lips as a mantra, the promise of their future filling the room as he tightened his grasp on her, pulling her closer to him to show her once again, how much he loved her. 

-----

taglist: @honethatty12 @lifeonawhim @ashamedtobewhitemanswhore27 @maryvibess @wheredidmyeyesgo @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @uniquexusposts @sillyfreakfanparty

[olderthannetfic]

Since you've mentioned that you use Scrivener as a word processing software, I have a bit of a weird-ish question. I have looked at the programme and it seems incredibly useful, and then I looked at the pricetag and- gulp.

I currently use Word which costs 5 euros per year thanks to university, but am thinking about switching to another programme that isn't related to my uni as I feel too paranoid about my smutty fanfic ideas being looked at by my uni and them disapproving of my writing. XD (Word keeps marking "fuck" with a squiggly line and suggesting I choose another word to avoid offending my readers, but if canon doesn't give Barclay some holographic MMF action taking place during "A Fistful of Datas" and turning both his holographic partners into holographic Data and therefore inducing maximum tension and insecurity due to feelings in poor sandwiched Barclay whenever he meets actual Data after that, I will have to write it myself! :P )

According to the website where one can buy a Scrivener license, one pays for the current version of it and will have to buy later versions anew if I haven't misunderstood. You seem to have used it for quite a while, and I haven't managed to find out when the different versions came out. I know the current one is 3, but I am unsure how much time passed between 1 and 2 and 2 and 3, and am unsure whether it's a good idea to buy a license now or whether it would be wiser to wait if it's likely that another version might be released in the near future (that is within one year for example) because then I might wait a little while with my purchase, heh. It probably sounds quite stingy but I am solely getting it for my tiny and too seldom indulged hobby of writing fanfic, and currently have to kinda sorta pay more attention to my wallet and where its contents go, so to say, which is why I'm hesitant.

The question basically is: As a (probable?) long-time user, do you think it's likely a new version of Scrivener will be released within the next year or so or do you think it's likely the current version will be tha latest to purchase for a longer while than 1-2 years?

I hope this rambly mess makes sense, haven't really slept for quite some time, so I am sorry if this is terribly incomprehensible. Sorry for the weird stingy question. Have a nice day and I hope you have slept and will sleep better than I currently do, heh!

--

I've only used it for like three years.

A quick google suggests that Scrivener 2 was released in 2010. 3 was released in 2017 basically to keep up with OS changes.

(IDK what you searched, but this isn't hard to find, dude.)

Scrivener is a fairly... old-fashioned style of software, I guess I'd call it. Some dude wrote himself a program to write his own novel and then people liked it. Some other guy decided to port it to Windows.

They update approximately never. When they do, recent buyers of the old one upgrade for free and everybody else gets like half off. The trial period is 30 days of actual use. The current retail license for 3 is only like sixty bucks. It's a commercial product, but... not like you've been trained to expect by your average modern software that wants to nickle and dime you at every turn.

Do you need Scrivener? Well, no. Not unless you want customizable high-level ebook output formatting and fancy features like that. You could just use some other free option if you just want to type stories in something that isn't Word. But Scrivener is priced extremely low for what it is.

[firethekitty]

Ranking Every Wolfwood!!

happy wolfwood wednesday! i've ranked every wolfwood and it very quickly got out of hand and turned into more of a character analysis/meta. it was really fun and helped me better understand why i love this guy so much!

yes, really!

i hope you guys enjoy and that my autistic rambling makes sense!

1. trimax wolfwood. yeah he’s perfect. nothing else to say. god bless

while i can’t fit everything i love about him into one post, just know that i’ve written almost 30,000 words in wolfwood (and vash) character studies. so when i say “i like trimax wolfwood” that really means “i am fucking obsessed with trimax wolfwood”.

he’s the perfect mix of silly and heartbreaking, funny and serious, annoying like an older brother, deeply kind, so so painfully human; and a PERFECT foil to vash. simply phenomenal writing.

my only complaint would be that his tits are not on display like they are in the 1998 anime. but i can appreciate the subtly, so this doesn’t detract from his otherwise flawless score.

2. 98 wolfwood. omg hiiiii hehe twirling my hair ohh he’s so handsome what an absolutely beautiful design for him. his nose, his spider-esque shape, his TITS…… they even kept his little whiskers!

on top of an amazing design, he’s a very good balance of silly, irritable, playfully annoying, and serious! he fits pre-trimax wolfwood to a T!

but, as trimax progressed…

he’s cool. too cool. he has too much pull. wolfwood should NOT have swag. genuinely it is imperative to his character that he is, and i say this as lovingly as possible, a fucking loser with no friends.

wolfwood is a deeply traumatized man. he isn’t nearly as charming as we, the audience, thinks he is. no one laughs at his jokes, his insults are crude and immature, he embarrasses himself in front of literal children…

god, he is so painfully awkward. and who wouldn’t be in his situation? to have your childhood stolen and forced to grow up as a weapon? not allowed to interact casually with anyone else during the most important developmental stage of your life?

he's just not suave like tri98 wolfwood is. so, while 98 wolfwood is an excellent character, he doesn’t entirely read “wolfwood” to me. similar to how 98 vash is good on his own, but he’s just not “vash”. this is, of course, the result of making an anime out of a manga that wasn’t even 30% finished at the time. while i don’t understand the reasoning behind this, i know that nightow desperately needed the funds the anime brought in, as well as the motivation to keep making trimax, so i have to simply make peace with the dated characterizations tri98 has.

but don’t get me started on the milly situation. really a godawful writing decision, idk who approved that mess.

3. tristamp wolfwood. he is so bullyable. he’s like a sopping wet cat. absolute fucking dweeb.

i debated this for a long time—whether i should rank tristamp wolfwood above tri98 wolfwood. and i asked myself, do i love tri98 wolfwood because he’s a good character and is similar to trimax wolfwood? does he even remind me of trimax wolfwood at all? well, not really, he’s very clearly based on pre-trimax, just like tri98 vash is.

ultimately i decided i do genuinely just prefer tri98 wolfwood, but i felt the need to defend tristamp wolfwood because i see a lot of fair criticisms but also really dumb discourse throughout the fandom about him. so here’s my attempt at trying to address these:

so, there are some things i really enjoy about him and some things i really dislike; and, unlike vash, most of these criticisms are not a result of time/pacing issues. they’re easily fixable.

like, for the love of god he NEEDS to get sillier. they got the loser part down, but he’s a bit too overtly sad in tristamp. i think he will be more like his trimax self in season 2, but wolfwood’s humor is in-part a coping mechanism and important to his character. he’s an older brother! he’s fucking annoying! he thinks he's funny when he isn't! we do get a little bit of this with him and meryl, when he's tormenting her at the campfire, and that’s what i want to see more of. even if he’s playing it up, he should be working on getting their guards down, convincing them he isn't going to betray them.

since tristamp takes place in a weird prequel sort of canon, i get that he would look/act younger than he is in trimax. i think he was modeled after the teenage wolfwood we see in the flashback scenes of him training for the eye of michael, where he’s noticeably less outgoing and more reserved.

however, this doesn’t change the fact that he WAS silly as a kid in trimax, before his “teenage angst phase” (hate to call it that when it’s more like a “realizing he’s going to die by the gun and not being able to do anything about it” phase). but he’s still a lot quieter and reserved in tristamp as a kid, so i think we really need to find a good balance here in the trigun adaptations.

another example of an easily fixable issue—i really hate how they did the “vash sees how kind wolfwood is” scene, in which wolfwood gives money/snacks to children. in tristamp, wolfwood already knows the kid is zazie, which tells us absolutely nothing about his character. this scene is almost entirely worthless, only good for reminding vash that he should eat, which gives tristamp its own not-as-good hospital yuri scene.

and, so, about the elephant in the room… i don’t think he was whitewashed. let me try to explain my thought process.

tristamp, as far as i can tell, doesn’t seem to be taking any inspiration from tri98, whose wolfwood is very explicitly a brown man. trimax wolfwood i feel is a bit more ambiguous in his skin tone, which alternates between dark screentones and completely uncolored pretty much at solid 50/50 odds. just fairly inconsistent overall, even on the official manga covers.

but this doesn’t mean wolfwood is white in tristamp, and it doesn’t mean he doesn’t have his aquiline nose. the notorious scenes of him in the suns, looking white as a fucking sheet, shows us how a 3D environment can diminish a character’s silhouette and distinctive features.

compare this to scenes of wolfwood in a dim environment, or to the 2D scenes of child wolfwood and livio that i can't include bc i'm only allowed 10 pics. he looks MUCH better, much darker than vash, and as they both should appear in such lighting. it just doesn't add up—he should be much darker in strong light if they followed the same color values:

SO, even though i feel like all of this is more of a technical issue rather than malicious whitewashing, that doesn’t mean i think it’s acceptable. it looks fucking awful, and the lighting system needs major improvement to work with darker skin tones.

and, like, at the end of the day, wolfwood isn’t canonically latino, and he doesn't really have a consistent skin tone either. it’s a great headcanon, one i partially share, but it’s not canon. the only ethnicity that could technically be considered somewhat canon is japanese, as wolfwood was based off a japanese singer named tortoise matsumoto. you can see this resemblance best in early trigun!

and i really need to defend his nose!!! a lot of people say he lost his nose but he didn’t!! i promise it’s there!!! another victim of his 3D model, you can only see his nose from the side or in the 2D frame after he gets his shit wrecked. see how clearly he has a very well-defined nose when he’s hand-drawn? this is what i mean when i say a 3D environment can drastically alter a character’s important features, as much as i otherwise adore the animation for this show.

also, if you think nightow would let studio orange get away with not including his nose, you got another thing coming.

in conclusion, while i think tristamp wolfwood is a great start, he’s just not quite there yet. but i have immense faith that the next time we see him, he’ll look and act a lot more like he does in trimax!

i know this is true, because there are already some shots in tristamp where i’m just like. oh yeah. there he is. that’s wolfwood. there's the guy i love so much

...

well, that was long! this was really fun to write and i

oh jesus christ what the hell is that thing

4. badlands rumble wolfwood. ah, now here’s a great example of overt whitewashing. no lighting excuses this time, just blatant colorism.

even if he wasn’t ghostly white, there's just something about his design that makes me viscerally uncomfortable and i can’t pinpoint what it is exactly. he’s just so… angular. he has no scruff, no kitty cat mouth, his eyes are very oddly shaped, almost no eyebrows... i just really hate looking at him!

his ONLY saving grace is how mentally ill he acts in this movie. and his tits. otherwise i don’t really have much to say about him!

ok, now we’re done! and here’s a handy wolfwood chart i made to summarize everything.

really hope this was fun to read and if people liked this i'd be glad to write a vash version or other characters!! happy woowoo wednesday :)

[caprisunnydays]

Adventures of a not so average Voxtech employee : Chapter 1

You're an average corporate slave in hell to the most popular place of Voxtech. However, will you continue to be a basic worker when you slowly are entangled in your boss's personal situations?

Most of these chapters will be kinda stand alone, though connected through an over arching story, more on my ao3 when I can!

Word count : 1.7k

Life in hell wasn’t THAT bad. Well, it was still hell, but you’d come to appreciate the afterlife you’d made for yourself. Considering the unfortunate circumstance, you were able to find comfort in the twisted familiarity. It felt like being trapped in a tidepool, where the ebb and flow of the water brought fleeting moments of relief from the frigid depths. Yet, in this hellish existence, there was no escape from the relentless cycle. At times you weren’t drowning in the anguish of your existence, but just like the ocean's chill, you felt a constant, dull pain. But things had been worse before you got this “job”.

You had no purpose for quite some time. Running around in search of suitable shelter each night, scavenging for food, and busting your ass to avoid bigger, more powerful demons was no way to live. Even now, you were new to hell. It had only been about a year since you died and fell into this horrid place, and for a few months, you were scrambling for a scrap of stability. Then in a turn of luck, you landed a job as a janitor in a Vox tech store, then worked your way up the totem pole (which wasn’t too hard when the boss of that store fired and killed people left and right if they looked at her funny) to where you sat today. 

A cubicle in Voxtech’s news script writing department for!

MUCH better than when you had no job and no place to sleep! Now it was just a 5-minute walk to the Voxtech building from your apartment every morning, work until you’re done, and hopefully get back home before 3 am! You weren’t so lucky this time, but you had accidentally fallen asleep on your 30-minute lunch break and turned it into an hour and a half, so maybe the overtime was karma. 

You sat hunched in your chair, a fluffy blanket from home wrapped around your shoulders, and the taste of cold coffee was on your tongue as you typed corrections on the last of your assignments. When you discounted the burn of the blue light in your eyes, you entered a meditative state that combined focus and dissociation into the killer combo known as your “work mode”. It got you through the days, nights, and mornings you spent doing overtime with no extra pay. Your eyes wandered to the clock in the corner of your screen.

3:15 am

Eh, not as bad as it could be.

Even once you finish this, you’ll probably end up sleeping in your makeshift office bed, which consists of your blanket and a flat-ass pillow being shoved under your desk so you don’t have to deal with going home just to come back in 3 hours. You stretch, pushing your rollie chair away from the desk and groaning at your stiff joints. You stood up and looked over the rows of dividers to see empty cubicles. This was probably the first time in forever that you had been the only one in the office, even at this late hour. The glowing of your singular computer screen and the hum of the AC bordered something you’d see on a Lofi study video, bringing a sense of comfortable isolation to your dead heart. That was until you heard the clicking of shoes against the office floor and doors being slammed.

“Mother FUCKING useless pieces of shit! The one day they say they can come in for maintenance checks and their sorry asses flake AGAIN?! I swear to Satan I’m sending someone to burn down that company for making ME do this bullshit myself because like hell am I gonna deal with shit in my company not working and costing me money-”

 You froze at the aggressive rambling as it approached your station. You slowly sat back down and turned off your computer, sitting silently. Your fingertips brushed the handle of your bat, which you kept under your desk for cases like this. In case one of those nut jobs with much less sanity than you decided to throw themselves in the building and go on a rampage. You gingerly picked the weapon up as the angry ranting got closer. The footsteps crescendoed until a figure was nearing the opening of your cubicle, and you shot up, bat drawn back ready to swing.

The TV demon screamed, jumping back in a laughably cartoonish way, arms over his face and one leg off the ground. His screen buffered, his scream lagging while a code ‘HOLY SHIT’ flashed across his screen.

“AH SHIT! What the fuck are you doing here?” You stood there in the dark for a beat, before putting the bat under your desk and turning your computer back on.

“Work.” You yawn and sit back down. You accessed the man, your brain slowly catching up to reality despite its drowsy fog. 

TV demon…loud…angry…oh shit this is my boss.

In your entire time working for this man, you seldom saw him in the flesh…or, circuits rather. That made sense, he’s VOX. Owner of Voxtech, one of the most powerful overlords in hell, and from what you could tell, a workaholic. He built this empire that you only played a minuscule part in. It was something to marvel at, if you thought about it deeply enough, but you also knew he had a habit of slaughtering anybody disrupting the machine he kept so well-oiled. Maybe that’s why the manager of your department was such an asshole all the time, but you’re sure that she was born to play the role of a narcissistic, cold-hearted bitch. All that aside, you didn’t want to set off the big man who controlled your life standing right next to you, so you just sat in your chair, awkwardly waiting to be spoken to again.

“And your “work” has you sitting in the dark with a bat like a lunatic?” He groaned and rubbed his face. “I mean seriously, I’m surprised you’re still here when I specifically told everyone to get their asses out of this office before 3am.” You squinted in confusion. You were never usually told to leave by a certain time. Everyone above you 

ALWAYS wanted you and the other corporate slaves working around the clock to keep making money. You quickly opened your email.

Nothing about that in there.

Maybe they had an announcement that you just didn’t hear? But you’d been working your ass off the whole day and didn’t-

They had a meeting while I was asleep on my lunch break and NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT IT?! These people really are fake as hell.

You knew not getting screamed at and almost killed by your boss for your unprompted nap was strange. She must have just let it slip so you’d have to deal with someone much worse. Vox was looking down at you with a furrowed brow and tapping foot. You considered your options, and the most rational thing you could think of was just to try and slowly extract yourself from the office. You grabbed your phone and turned off your computer, keeping your gaze down as you attempted to creep away.

“I am looking right at you, stop trying to sneak away as if I can’t see you.”

Well, there goes that plan.

Halting your movements, you began mentally preparing to be maimed. After all, it wouldn't be the first time that happened to you in this office. Your manager handed out physical punishments like candy, and while she had never killed you and forced you to respawn, you had been given horrific injuries countless times. You turned back to Vox, studying his form in the low lighting. He didn’t look THAT mad, more like he was contemplating something. His scrunched expression morphed into a charming smile, the one he’s known for. Was he about to use his eye on you?

“I could use your help with this inspection I’ve gotta do. You know this place best after all.” It was not a question, and since you were just preparing for a second death, you’d take this option with no complaints. You gave him a nod and he clasped his hands together, before grabbing one of your shoulders. “Greaaaat,” His smile dropped, “Let's get this shit done with.”

You proceeded to show him around the office, stopping at places that could be hazardous and require maintenance. The lights, electricity, and everything else that made this unit function was in order. You were only checking the places that made this place run smoothly, but that was to be expected. You ended off your maintenance tour by turning on every single computer to make sure they were functioning. You had only gotten through three when suddenly the office exploded with white light. Vox shot you a cocky smirk.

“It’s much faster that way,” He held out his hand, blue claws sparking as tiny bolts of electricity danced between his fingers, “but your manual technique was cute enough.” He stomped and let electricity surge through the floor again to shut off all the computers. Then he scoffed and pulled out his phone, texting someone aggressively. “Thank god that’s over with. I’m out, you should be too.” He pocketed his phone and began striding out the door. “Oh, and thanks for the help or whatever.” 

Just like that, he was gone. A breath of anxiety pushed out of your lungs, one you weren’t even aware of until the pressure of Vox’s presence was lifted. You had expected much worse. After all, the consensus among you and your peers was that he was a massive prick. But at least he didn’t grab you by the horns and throw you around till they cracked like your manager.

“…mission successful.” As you mutter under your breath some passive-aggressive comments you'd like to say to your colleagues, you gathered your belongings to head back to your apartment. Nearly stumbling over your improvised bed, you briefly consider just crashing there for the night. Mentally though, you’re so far gone that you might end up doing yourself even more of a disservice by staying. “Fuck it, I’m going home.” You chug the rest of your watered-down coffee and throw the mug in the office kitchen sink. 

As you stepped out into the vibrant streets of the entertainment district, you savored the moment when you closed the back door to the Vees' headquarters. There’s nothing like the sound of the lock clicking when you turn your work key in the knob and head off for the night.

I'm gonna make multiple chapters and post em on Ao3 whenever I get around to working on it. Will post the link here!

[themimicbird]

The Pigeon Press

Inked: December 29th, 2024-January 4th, 2025

Song of the week - "Suddenly I see" by KT Tunstall

Affirmation - Everything will work out for me, just as it is meant to.

What did I read this week?

Started reading Written in the Stars: Constellations, Facts, and Folklore by Alison Davies

What podcast/audio books did I listen to?

The Hitchups Audiobook by SANTAtheGREY

Rotten Mango by Stephanie Soo & Ramble

101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think by Brianna Wiest

Patronus Pages - A Harry Potter FanFics Podcast by Patronus Pages

What films did I watch this week?

Devil Wears Prada (2006)

What spiritual practices did I do?

New Years New Moon Energy Ritual

Blew a Kiss to my Reflection

Relocated and add items to my Aphrodite Altar

Self care

Did yoga

Did a "everything shower" x2

Started my 2025 journal

Got a new sha butter body wash

Bought a 50 pack of face masks at 2 am (it was on sale)

Bought The Ordinary Glycolic Acid 7% Exfoliating Toner

Reflection

This past week could have been better. I'm not gonna sit here and claimed that I went out dressed in glitter to a club or something. It wasn’t a terrible week by any means. At the start of the week I just decluttered my closet, bedroom, bathroom, and wardrobe. On December 31st, I re-did a new moon ritual I created a way back to invite new energy for the New Year.

For New Years I was forced to spend time yet again with my dad's side of the family. We spent Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years with them. I haven't seen my mom's side of the family for over a year now. I don't love my family per say. I wouldn't spend time around my family members if we weren't family if that makes sense. They're also all guys on my dad's side besides my girl cousins who are all like 8 and under. Some of my uncles grilled meat and we spent the night outside until around 11:00 when we went home to spend the last 30 minutes as immediate family only plus my older sister's boyfriend that no one likes but she insisted come because his family doesn't do anything for New Years.

On January 1, I spent the day journaling. I'm almost done finishing my prior to 2025 spreads. January isn't typically a busy month for me. It is more towards February that I have more up to date things to write about. Then from January 2-4 I spent some time on and off journaling, sending out information to my sorority chapter on their academic check ins, and made some plans with my Greek family tree to go out next week for my Little Mia's birthday.

Next Week

📒 Meryka's Academic Check in Monday @ 12:30 PM

📙 Jen's Academic Check in Monday @ 1:10 PM

📗 Gloria's Academic Check in Monday @ 2:10 PM

🎉 Little Mia's birthday brunch Tuesday @ 12:00 - 1:00 PM

💼 Officer Transition Workshop 2025 Wednesday @ 1:00 PM

📝 Complete Officer Academy course work Friday 11:59 PM

💻 Officer Academy Saturday @ 9:00 AM - 4:15 PM

[touchoffleece]

In Hindsight with the Ame retirement/special "graduation" announcement

The wording Ame chose for Pearl's final dialogue with Gigi/Gonathan makes much more sense. I can't recall the exact wording, but it was something along the lines of: "We are together again, but we must part ways going forward" -Pearl/Amelia Watson "We may not be together in the coming future, but for now can enjoy our reunion" -Gonathan ( even watching this live it confused me at it sounding as much as a goodbye as a reunion, but now I realize that it was Gigi ooc phrasing a goodbye to Pearl/Ame without spilling the beans since we know they get Graduation notices earlier than us the general public and viewers do) I was apprehensive of seeing Gonathan and Pearl together again in Ch 2 because of how demanding viewers can be of romantic pairings in roleplay settings, but this in hindsight is such a monkey's paw curling moment. On a more personal rambling note. I consider Gigi an Oshi of mine, and I know she is an old fan of Hololive possibly even pre Myth days (saw someone mention she applied multiple times even far back that it could have included Myth era resumes) so that Gigi got the chance to have such an opportunity to communicate with Ame on the big exclusive EN collab before the announcement was made makes me happy for her. On another hand I wish Shiori got the chance to collab with Ame some more since they both were of the same creative cloth, but both being shy I cherish the squid game interactions and memes we got. But all that put on the side: Thank you Ame, and good luck in your future endeavors. 💛

I couldn't find a shorter clip, but @ 23:30 the exchange I was referencing above

addendum: I realized this might sound like a reach about the double meaning of the exchange, but for further context on how much of a head noticed the talents knew of this retirement/graduation, Kiara mentioned she organized the 1 Block challenge for Myth and wanted all these Myth projects because by that point in the year (early into 2024) they knew of Ame's intentions to retire/graduate. That confirms Justice must have known the same info as the rest of the talents going into the ENReco project. addendum 2: I added some misc info on the timeline of things based of info that came out of the Ame talk stream showing that yes Gigi must have known Ame was Graduating by the time ENReco Finally happened effecting that final interaction between Pearl and Gonathan.

[themissingnumbers]

Hello, you wonderful people! I'm back, so you know what that means ;) It's everybody's favorite time—Theory Time! (More like me yapping about little things my brain hyperfocused on and wouldn't let me stop thinking about but I digress-) You all know how I function by now. I write things down in the order I think of them, so things are probably gonna be really scattered (also I'm writing this at 2:30 in the morning), but if you can look past all of that, then I hope you enjoy my ramblings.

In this Special Edition of The New Yap Times: More on the References, some Observations, and Assorted Theories.

Hoo-boy. Where do I even start? I never even know if my thoughts make sense before I write them down, so I guess we'll see where this goes lmao. Okay-

Talking Point 1: Fire.

Thoughts—I have many thoughts—so let's get started. Let's go over the flavor text in Fire's Reference first. That stuff gives me bad vibes. I don't like the way it makes me feel because I don't feel like it's Fire saying any of it. It's like a third party (Arceus?) trying to warn us using the reference as a medium. But, in the same breath, I'd also say that it sounds like a plea, or potentially a taunt. And maybe it's just me who feels like the flavor text over the spoiler guards is a taunt, because for me, whoever is speaking is right! Whoever is speaking is absolutely right about me—I would never hurt him, not intentionally at the very least—but don't tell me what I'm gonna do or what I'm thinking!

Okay, hear me out. I'm on the train of "If learning something about a character hurts them, then I'm okay not knowing", but I know that a lot of people aren't riding the same train as me. And that's exactly why the whole "You'd never hurt him like that. Of this, I am sure." line bothers me so much. I know players—nay—I know humans, and if anyone takes it as a taunt as I did initially, or, god forbid, as a challenge, then this whole thing could end in catastrophe for Fire. If whoever-the-fuck is writing/speaking the flavor text over the spoilers is using it as an elaborate plan to make us "betray" Fire and to make him trust people less when someone inevitably pushes things too far then I swear- Listen, and I hate using this phrase, but it's giving manipulation and I don't fuck with that. (<- is all of this Paranoia? Am I just being Paranoid? I think I may be Paranoid. I need to calm down-) (My brain goes in strange directions sometimes. I believe this is one of those times, but I still wrote it down anyway.)

OKAY, BUT ALSO- Why is Fire's base blacked out? Like, the only parts we can see are what I'm assuming are his Casual and his Trainer/Legendary clothes, and I can understand why the Soul form would be blacked out, but why the base? I'm just assuming that something in his design changed a lot, like his scars or something, so they blacked it out for a big reveal later down the line, but it still bugs me. Why would the most "vulnerable" and "real" parts of him be blacked out when it isn't for anyone else? Leaf, Blue, and Red all have their bases revealed with scars and all, but not Fire. Is the veil hiding some sort of vulnerability, and that's why it's in place? To keep Fire looking strong and like the "very best" that he's supposed to be? I'm not gonna point any fingers but, uh, I find it very suspicious that we're only seeing the perfect and put-together "Fire" Red that Arceus wants the world to see.

The second thing I wanna talk about is the fact that Fire is Friendless. Like, for a man of such status, surely he has some friends, right? Well, no... Not anymore at least. I know this sounds weird, and that my brain does odd things, but let me tell you why I'm pointing this out. Let's go over Fire's friends list real quick. I think we got: Blue, Leaf, and Gold. Some of you may say that Leaf doesn't count, and that's okay, but I say she does. And Red isn't on this list because I don't think they've ever met face-to-face in canon before. Anyways, let's go over those three relationships, shall we? While I'm not 100% sure about most of these, I'm going to describe what I've picked up about their relationships and how I see them.

Blue/Fire: Complicated. That's all I can really say about these two, is that it's complicated. If my memory serves, I think that complicated is how Starry described their relationship too, so I can't call them enemies, but I definitely can't call them friends either.

Leaf/Fire: Strained. While it's probably not as complicated as whatever the fuck Blue and Fire have going on, it's definitely complex. It's not a friendship with these two, it's a familial relationship, and that's what makes it difficult. I'm sure that, deep inside somewhere, both Leaf and Fire still love each other—they're siblings after all—but that all of the stuff that's happened in their lives has opened up a giant ravine between them that neither of them knows how to bridge. They can't close that gap, so their relationship is strained. They love each other, but the tension between them is palpable. There's bitterness, there's anger, there's resentment, there's regret and sadness, and maybe if you look hard enough—there might just be a flicker of longing in both of them to repair their relationship. But for now, they're miles apart, and it doesn't look like they're getting closer any time soon. I wouldn't call those two friends.

Gold/Fire: We'll... I'm sure that these two were good friends at one point. Fire still thinks about him, and even seems to miss him or grieve him. But unfortunately, Gold is Dead, so we'll never truly know unless Fire decides to confide in us about it.

Now, it just seems like Fire really doesn't have any friends. And I would have let all of this slide had it not been for ONE THING. The Espeon. Fire's Espeon was always a point of interest for me because I wondered where it went and what the Missing Numbers creators were going to do with the missing Pokémon. As it turns out, the Espeon is now in Leaf's possession. Initially, I was like "Oh okay that's kinda cool" but now I'm like "WAIT-! SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THIS!" Why is it that the only Pokémon in Fire's Team to Evolve via Friendship was removed from his party? Had this just been either the Espeon or the strained/distant relationships, I wouldn't have noticed anything, but this cannot be a coincidence. Nothing is a coincidence in Missing Numbers. With how the universe keeps removing friends from his life, it's like he's purposefully being Isolated to an extreme degree. Like something or someone wants him to be completely alone...

AND THE LAST THING ABOUT FIRE- (I'm so sorry for yapping about Fire this much, I swear. I told you I had a lot of thoughts, and there's still more after this.) That section in his new Bio/Description saying "But every time he vanishes and appears again, it's always from that same mountain, his gaze duller at every return." gave me an entire theory all on its own. What if all of the isolation is intentional? What if Arceus is intentionally ruining all of Fire's relationships, killing his friends and pulling him away from his family, isolating him from the world at the top of a freezing-cold mountain (I'm assuming with the help of Leaf under the guise of "protecting him") where none of his Pokémon can safely exit their Pokéballs without risking death? We know that Fire is a pretty warm individual beneath that cold exterior—he's a sweetheart—and Arceus doesn't want him to be. What if Arceus is trying to (no pun intended) ice out what little bit of emotional warmth and personality that Fire has left in him, and is slowly succeeding? Like, he's trying to snuff out the real Fire and leave behind the Red husk that he wants as his perfect protagonist.

Jesus Christ, finally- Talking Point 2: Red. (I know, we're going right back to a Red. But these next parts are going to be smaller than Fire's don't worry-)

Man, this weirdo... Where do I even start with him? First things first, let's lock in on that skin of his bruh. WHY does he look like that??? The only time I've ever seen any person with skin even remotely like his is when looking at people with Albinism, and even they aren't that white. Red is like... ghostly white. White as a sheet. Dead as a damn Doornail white. I don't know how to describe him other than the fact that he looks dead! Genuinely! I guess that my current running theory is still kinda similar to the Parasite one I made a while back, but like... worse??? (I've been at this for 5 hours straight. Can you tell I'm running out of steam?) I feel like I don't know enough to make a proper theory about him yet; like I need to reevaluate everything I've been seeing this far like I did with Fire. Is Red really Red? Is it just a small part of him that's there? Is it MissingNo in Red's body, using his memories to try and trick us? He kept mentioning "the right opportunity" back when we were talking with him. When is that opportunity? What does it look like? How much has changed behind the scenes? And how is that one little "Hey. That's private. :/" thing a secret when he LITERALLY spilled his guts not even two inches to the left? I don't know! There are too many questions and I'm too tired to answer them myself this time. :|

Talking Point 3: Something much smaller this time :]

Okay, I guess I'll throw in some of the random bits and things I thought of that didn't really get a whole spot. (This is already too long-)

Is it just me, or does the flavor text kinda read like an automated voice message? Like "Sorry! The number you have dialed has been disconnected or is no longer in service." type stuff, which kinda fits with the theme of Blue being a busybody and always doing something, or that's what I get from his new Bio at least. To me, Leaf's flavor text kinda reads as bitter. You already know what I think about Fire's flavor text, and Red's is... Yeah, that's just him talking.

Also, Green is hella cool! That mask is sick! (Psst! Mod Hells! Hey, you make a cool ass character homie. I like their mysteriousness and look forward to seeing more of them. Keep it up!)

And, closing statements time! Jesus, I'm gonna apologize again for how long this is. I didn't mean to make it super messy like this but it's currently 7 something in the morning for me and my brain shut off halfway through writing this, so... whoops :/ Anyway, funny story really quick! Starry, I know you had no idea you even did this, so I gotta tell you. The day after I posted that Character Reference Analysis thingy, I ended up getting sick and was messed up for a couple of days, but then you posted that drawing of Aster and I swear to you it was like you shocked my body back into being healthy because 24 hours later I'm damn near over the sickness and am phasing out the last of my symptoms as I write this. So, I know you didn't mean to, but thanks anyway! :D

Okay! And with that out of the way, I think that's all, folks! I hope you enjoyed this odd edition of my thoughts. Until next time. Thank you for reading The New Yap Times!

.

[dangoulains-devotion]

my humble onions on That One Bit Of Dialogue™ (you know the part) from that spooky Nibel sidequest

Prefacing this by saying I'm very chill with whatever they decide to end up doing with Vincent as long as it's interesting and not just "surprise twist for the sake of surprise twist" if u get what I mean. And seeing other theories is fun! So I thought I might share my own

But my personal first impression when he said he'd had plenty of chances to pull the trigger but couldn't doesn't necessarily mean he's talking about literally shooting sephiroth. I parsed it more as a "I knew very well that something was likely to go awry with Sephiroth even if the Jenova detail wasn't known to me, I knew that Lucrecia had chosen to experiment on her unborn child, I knew that with Hojo involved it was going to be a disaster, I knew I knew I knew. But I still couldn't bring myself to stop any of it from happening because I couldn't bear to hurt her."

From what I remember from that sit-down at the table flashback scene in Dirge, he was aware that Something was going to happen to this child but he couldn't have known what. If we're going to follow the line of pulling the trigger literally, I felt like it was more aimed at Hojo in that he regrets he didn't shoot first... My man's could've negated like All of FF7 if he'd beaten Hojo to the punch lmfaoghskhg

Vincent very much does not and has never come across as someone to kill a child or consider doing so, sure he was a turk but I feel like the whole thing with Reno after the plate drop was supposed to drive home that as much as they know certain abhorrent things are part of their job, it doesn't mean that they necessarily want to or feel good about it.

I am certainly interested still in what's gone on in the remakes with his situation of what we previously knew as him sleeping for his sins - the room itself didn't seem like it'd been untouched for 30 years and he had that speaker that let him hear yuffie and barret bantering in the elevator... If he had it as a way of alerting him to intruders, and that it would wake him up, then perhaps there was a literal "I failed to shoot" moment when the Nibelheim Incident was about to happen. He'd have known there was people down there when Sephiroth holed himself up if that was the case, maybe he considered it at that point but hesitated for several reasons

But then again! They kept Crisis Core 1:1, and when Zack finds the coffin, unless Vincent was feigning it to be anti-social, he seemed pretty out cold. So maybe he only started to actively move around/have that speaker *after* the Nibelheim Incident because it tore at him to know that something so tragic happened so close and yet he did nothing because he was asleep... So it was a choice made to be more vigilant? Who knows!

This is kinda rambly and somewhat out of order which I apologise for. It's not even my full thoughts about this damn character, we'd be here all day if I unravelled it all in detail! But I do think that, provided Dirge doesn't get retconned completely, it's likely he considers his gravest sin regarding Sephiroth was that he didn't intervene to divert the poor child's fate before it was even born. And when I say intervene I mean stop the experiment from proceeding rather than tucking his tail and letting the woman he cared for make One Real Fucked Up Choice (that's a part of Lucrecia I appreciated and kind of really hope they don't lighten or retcon about her - the way her ambition and drive was her greatest strength but also her worst traits in that it meant her sense of ethics and the like was tossed to the wayside in favour of Progress™ and Science™.)

Who knows honestly! I'm just glad we got to see him and that he's not optional anymore <3 and that he's a dork besides! I'm also very interested in his left eye... There's some parts where his left eye is much more open than his right when he's wincing or when he back flipped out of the coffin... We've seen he can close them both properly but that small detail felt intentional so I guess we'll seeeeee

I wrote this more as a tossing my 2 cents into the pool, and to organise some of my thoughts I suppose... Cid and Vincent were the two parts I was most excited for with Rebirth and after having completed it as well as side quests and the QB storyline I have much 2 think about...

If you read all the way to here then I appreciate u sticking with my rambling... I am mentally unwell about that tragic old man 🫡

[jell0buss-37]

hiiiii i am absolutely in LOOOVEEEE with your fics<3333

i wanted to request something for peter b parker x fem!reader where it’s just a day in their life (domestic fic basically :3) like the reader owns a flower shop so she gets dressed in the morning so she can open it all while peter is watching her from the bed and talking about all the plans she has for today (and maybe telling her why she can’t stay for awhile in bed with him🤭🤭) then maybe once she’s at the shop, peter stops by to talk to her and leaves her lunch so she isn’t hungry :33

AND maybe possibly peter helping an old lady pick out some flowers and reader being surprised he knows what flowers go with what LMAO

i hope this makes sense and i would love to see what you do with this<33333

have an amazing day/night 🤍

This is so cute 🥺 and thank you!! I hope you like it. I got to use my flower language!

A day with Peter B!

He's most likely coming in from a long night of being spiderman, slipping out of his suit and under the covers next to you around 6 in the morning

You usually wake up around that same time, and aren't usually in bed at the same time as him, usually just walking out as he walks in

But it's a Sunday

And so you both cuddle in the early hours of the day, quiet mumbles passed between you two

Because it was Sunday, you opened your flower shop at 10 instead of 7 in the morning

You had sat up in bed at about 8, his arms around your waist and his head nestled into your stomach, your legs on either side of him, running your fingers through his hair, as he sighs in content

These were his favorite moments

He's dozing off, completely at peace, when you have to get up and start getting ready

He tightens his arms around you, a sound of protest leaving his lips

"Gimme like... 5 more days." "Pete, I have to make breakfast at least."

You end up having to get a muffin at a coffee shop near your flower shop

By around 12:30, he stops by to do his daily visit

"You never gave me my goodbye kiss :(" "Petie, you had your head under the pillows. I had to kiss your shoulder." "It's not the same :((("

He brings you some of his brownies that he had made at around 11 when he woke up that day before heading to see you

You two sit in the back office as he tells you about how his night went

He also brought the leftovers from last night that you had set aside for him

"This was my third plate. Your lasagna always hits the spot honey!"

In turn you tell him about your day so far, and he listens intently. No matter how wild his life as a hero is, he always finds your life interesting

You guys actually met when he was stopping these robbers from breaking into your store. You had been in the back, a baseball bat by your side, shaking

You almost hit him, but he dodged it and helped calm you down

He thought you were really headstrong, and stopped by the next day

He actually was too scared to talk to you, his confidence leaving him every time you'd smile

It took him a week to properly start talking to you

And you've been inseparable since

You guys finish your little lunch at around 1:30

On his way out, he quickly picks out a bouquet and hands it to what looked like a new couple

"Get her some red tulips and red roses. It means I love you newly in flower talk."

He absolutely loves whenever you'd ramble on about different flowers and what they meant

You were always so passionate whenever you spoke about them

And it made you blush whenever you catch him staring at you with such a lovesick look in his eyes

And so you couldn't help but smile whenever he'd help out your customers

He leaned over the counter, planting a big ol kiss to your lips, grabbing your face between his hands

"Big Smooch!" He'd say before doing it

"There's more where that came from ;)"

It always left you flustered, even after he'd flash that goofy grin and flutter his eyelashes at you, almost skipping out the door and on his way back to your guys' apartment

He usually goes back to take his evening nap before you came home to wake him up and have dinner with him before he went to work as the vigilante on Sundays

But when you get off of work at 7:00, you're surprised to see him waiting outside your door, wearing a suit and holding one of your favorite dresses, along with some of your shoes and some of your makeup

"Get ready, doll face. I'm taking you out tonight, and taking the night off to romance your ass."

You roll your eyes, before getting changed in your office, dressing up nicely for him

"Okay pretty lady, hang on tight!"

He swings you two over to a nice restaurant

You guys enjoy a night of laughter and good food, drinking wine and having a lovely date at 8:30

By 9:30 or 10, it didn't really matter, you guys were back in your living room, dancing to a song neither of you cared to learn the name of

You'd start out fast dancing, honestly just stumbling and shuffling around eachother

Then eventually he'd hold you in his arms, your head on his shoulder, his hand holding yours over his heart, the other wrapped safely around your waist. Ever the gentleman

Eventually you'd doze off, and he'd carry you to bed and watch you as you rest peacefully, his heart racing as he watches you

By 11:30, you both are out like a light, in each other's arms and dreaming of more days like this

[plasmaapologist]

...just realized i left my introduction in the drafts. oops. at least i have a better photo now.

my names tula, and i'm a registered pokémon nurse with a horrible tendency to ramble. i live in unova and do some work here, but i mainly travel to other regions for this.

i am a former member of team plasma. former. my username is ironic because i cope with humor.

i ran away from home at age 14- it's a long story - and ended up being indoctrinated in. i, like many others, were lucky to have a sort of "snap to reality" moment after ghetsis' first arrest, before the formation of neo plasma, but not before i spent 10 years of my life working for him. many people are shocked by how open i am about my experience, but i think its extremely important to talk about these things: if i could help just one person leave this cycle, or keep someone from entering it, then it would make the shame worth it.

i have dedicated my life to helping pokémon, as a way to attone, i suppose. my darling solosis, mini, travels with me, though i must admit she's quite the spoiled brat. to have such an innocent creature love and trust you is the most healing experience someone can ask for, and i acknowledge that i was so very lucky. i had a home to return to, i was able to find work despite my history, and physically, i bear only a scar on my back and a missing finger... also just so we all know i am a natural ginger and i am not going to dye my hair please stop asking thanks

feel free to ask me any questions you may have: about pokemon, about myself, or my experience with team plasma, any of the sort. and if you need help leaving neo plasma or a group like it, please shoot me a message, i'll give you all the advice i can.

- tula ☆

ooc and admin info:

hi! im cassini, im 21, and i have not rpd since middle school. please be nice

im okay with joining events and plotlines! but i do not know how to join in naturally and get too embarrassed to ask. please shoot me a message/invite! muse list bellloowwwww tulas info

im not lore compliant at times and am even willing to bend (most) of my own headcanons bc multiverse and the likes! very flexible in general

okay more important tula things:

- sapient pokemon interaction is okay! tula will generally believe them. shes seen weirder. legendaries will be met with much more scrutiny, but kindness.

- i keep her age purposefully vauge for "pokemon timeline makes no sense" reasons, but you can generally imagine her somewhere between 26-30, probably.

- shes been through a lot and often copes with humor, which means she tends to come off the wrong way a lot of the time

- though open about her time in plasma, she doesnt like talking about how it affected her

- she speaks before thinking and often posts in bursts do to this

- she has a pretty shitty memory

MUSE LIST:

Timeline 1:

Tula Gagnon - @plasmaapologist (OC. 📍Unova. Birthday: January 1st)

Callisto Aoki - @cherishcherubi (OC. 📍 Kalos. Birthday: October 25th)

Iolana Kealoha - @teamskullkalos (OC. 📍Kalos. Birthday: April 12th)

Timeline 2:

Mari Pijotto - @marifromkoto (OC. 📍Paldea. Birthday: December 18th)

Katy - @patisserie-soapberry (Canon. 📍Paldea.)

Atticus - @navisquadatticus (Canon. 📍Paldea.)

Larry - @medali-gym (Canon. 📍Paldea. Half joke blog.)

Robin Lusk - @absolsrenegade (OC/Self Insert. 📍Unova. Birthday: July 5th)

Timeline 3:

Timeline Unknown:

Grise (Hilda Lewis) - @driftingtrainer (Canon. 📍 Vagabond. Birthday: October 5th)

Rochelle Ichihara - @basaltpowder (OC. 📍Hoenn. Birthday ??? )

Barbie & Ken: @championbarbie-swimmerken - (It's fucking Barbie. Yeah, the pink one. 📍 Everywhere. She's Barbie. Birthdays: March 9th, March 11th)

Ice - @rottenice OC. 📍Primarily Sinnoh, but travels a lot. Birthday: December 21st. Please read content warnings in the pinned post.

Miki Nakajima - @nakajima-lgm OC.📍 Johto. Birthday unknown. Please read content warnings in the pinned post.

@galacticfoundation - Team Galactic AU blog.

@twotoypokemon Pokémon Rumble based blog. Sapient Pokémon OC. 📍Axel Town

[clonerightsagenda]

Sick

We're most of the way through disability pride month and I'm not sure if I'll ever finish this WIP because I'm stuck over how literal to make some of the elements. So, I am posting it because I am curious if any of the weirdness resonates with other people. Enjoy my magical disability cure codependent haunting thing, and also I am going to post a rambling author's note about it.

The morning after the surgery, your Sick is sitting at the kitchen table. It looks good, for a corpse. It’s wearing the ‘I love dying and being dead’ t-shirt you joked about buying two diagnoses ago, pulled over a laced-shut hospital gown.

“What?” it asks. “You had more of a sense of humor when you were sick.”

The doctors warned you that your neurochemistry might be out of balance. You’re adjusting to the sudden lifting of brain fog after moving through the world in a protective cocoon of pharmaceuticals. They didn’t mention hallucinations.

“Think of me like a phantom limb.” Your Sick sips one of those awful plant-based protein drinks that still lurk in the back of your pantry. “Why did you do it?”

Talking to hallucinations probably makes them worse. You do it anyway. “You were killing me.”

“This world is killing you. But you finished yourself off first.”

You sit down across from it in one effortless motion. “That’s not what happened.”

“Right. I’m the enemy. So it doesn’t matter if I’m rotting at the bottom of a biohazard bin.” It considers you. “What’s it like not to hurt?”

What is it like? You’d woken up and lain there for a while, waiting. “Like holding my breath.”

“You’re in charge of all that now.” It nods, the motion referencing the length of your body. “Need to stay on top of it.”

“Like I need advice from you,” you say, but you blink, and the phantom’s gone.

60,000 pieces of microplastic. 7.2 micrograms per liter of per- and polyfluoroalkyl substances. 1:640 antinuclear antibody titer.

That's what they peel you out of. A second nervous system of petroleum products and misfiring T cells, the stuff that's been running your life via mob rule for a decade. They tell you that you weigh five grams less now.

They tell you, don't be surprised if at first it feels like something is missing.

I thought that was just for rich people, your friend says. She messaged you to remind you to take your meds, and you told her that you would never have to take your meds again. Celebrities and politicians.

Work decided it was cheaper to fix me than replace me, you message back. Score one for being essential.

Perks of your top-secret job.

I promise it's boring. Critical infrastructure usually is.

Did you look?

Some people share post-op pictures. They’re usually underwhelming if you don’t know what to look for - the subtle swelling over an aggravated nerve, hints of boniness in the knuckles. Shadows of bruises that never go away. No. I should’ve, though. I asked for hospital socks when they were prepping me but then obviously after I didn’t have them anymore. Who knows if I’ll get another chance.

You might be finished with surgeries forever and you’re disappointed because you can’t get any more grippy socks.

I'll miss the warm blankets too.

Your Sick crawled inside you when you were nineteen years old. It wouldn’t let you get out of bed.

“Help,” it croaked.

Your roommate (only your roommate then) came the second time it called. She was in her pajamas, her hair a dark tangle. You never asked for her help, even when your hands got so sore you couldn’t open jars without five minutes of struggle. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t feel right,” it said.

Her face softened. “I thought you looked rough yesterday. I don’t have class this morning; do you want me to make something? Call anybody?”

No, you tried to say. I can handle it.

“I think I need to go to the doctor,” your Sick said instead.

You had been putting it off. The doctor meant admitting something was wrong, meant – most importantly – a $30 copay. But healthy people never understand when you try to tell them. At a certain point, your body stops being yours.

Your Sick turned up its nose at greasy slices of campus pizza. It politely but firmly refused invitations for a night out. It sanded the branching tree of your life into a wooden sphere it could cup in the palm of its hand.

“You’re ruining my life,” you told the mirror.

It tilted your head. You read your own confusion. “I’m protecting you.”

“Mask,” your Sick says from behind you. It looks worse today – skin gone gray and patchy, with a shimmer of microplastic shards risen to the surface like body glitter. The shine complements the sequined mask secured over its own face.

You scowl, bag swung over one shoulder. You haven’t gone out since the surgery – you can work from home, you haven’t canceled grocery delivery yet – and now that you’re venturing through your front door, the phantom is back. You had reached for one of the masks on the table by the door before dropping it back into the bowl. “I don’t need it now.”

“So respiratory diseases don’t exist anymore? Dumbass.”

The objection reminds you of your own aggrieved complaints: why don’t people plan events with us in mind, don’t they know how many people there are with immune systems one shove away from collapsing, the world’s not getting any safer.

That was your Sick talking. You don’t have to worry anymore.

“You weren’t doing a good job taking care of me before, and you’re not doing a good job of it now.”

Its eyebrows rise. Black liquid has seeped through the cloth of its mask. “And fuck everyone else like you?”

“Like you,” you say, and slam the door in its face.

Outside, the breeze brushes your cheeks. You don’t have to sit down because you miscalculated the balance of meds and breakfast. You start to scan your surroundings for bathrooms, just in case, and then dismiss the impulse because you’re fine.

You’re better than that.

Three hours in, you realize you’ve been curling your fingers into a fist and then opening them again. You only notice because the joints start to ache. It feels familiar.

Nothing else does.

A notification flashes in the corner of your screen. There’s new activity in one of the forum conversations you’ve been following.

It’s rich people doing what they always do. Wreck the planet? It’s fine, we can get a new one! Wreck your body? It’s fine, we can get a new one of that too. There’s no incentive to improve the situation if you can buy your way out of the problem.

I’d buy my way out too, but there’s no way I could afford it

Then you’d eat your first plastic salad and get sick again. See what I mean?

The new ones are supposed to be more resilient

But it’s not yours

Remember any theological debates go in the quarantine thread

I don’t mean it like that. I just think you’re interfering with your relationship with your body, and that’s a fundamental part of who you are, right? Whether or not a s*ul exists

There’s not a bot monitoring this thread. You don’t have to censor it.

Sorry, habit

Mod is human, asterisks don’t stop me. But they are a screenreader issue, so please edit your post.

You used to frequent disability forums. They had useful resources. Jokes, too, like the t-shirt your Sick wears over its hospital gown. But you can’t understand the people who embrace their disfunction. You took a time-honored approach to your medical misfortune. Cancer. Pregnancy. Demonic possession. Petrochemicals. There is something inside me, and I want it out.

These people helped you, but you don’t need them anymore. So instead of saying anything, you log off the forum for the last time.

You do tell your coworkers, who are excited for you. They pester you with questions over Slack: How long did it take? Did you look? Does it hurt?

Your boss messages you, When can you come back to the office?

You frown at the screen. The work you’ve been doing from home is good – better than what you’ve produced for years now that your head is clear. But your boss has always been old fashioned. Remote work was a concession that there’s no justification for now.

Monday, if you want, you type back.

That gets you an immediate thumbs up reaction, followed by, We’re all so glad you’re ok.

That chafes you in a spot rubbed raw. Everyone assumes once the problem they know about has been addressed, everything else must be resolved too. You must be ok.

Which you are, this time.

Your best friend comes to visit. She brings beers you couldn’t drink with your meds and a greasy pizza that settles in your stomach like a snake planning to strike later. It tastes amazing – you run your tongue over your teeth to capture the last traces of salty richness and tell yourself next time your body will recognize good food.

She’s spent the whole visit on your sofa. You have an air mattress from when she used to sleep on your floor while you were recovering from surgeries. She hasn’t asked you to bring it out, and you’re not sure how to ask if she’s staying. Instead you keep stealing glances at her, the curve of her cheek that’s the first thing you’d see when you looked over the side of your bed in the middle of the night, the hands that have held your hair back from the toilet bowl and now rest on her lap.

She keeps looking at you too. You wonder if she sees a difference.

After the silence and sidelong glances build into an itchy layer on your skin, you lean over, clutch the front of her shirt, and kiss her. She freezes and then kisses you back, gingerly, the way you'd investigate an unexpected bruise. There’s pizza grease on both your lips. Rich and unfamiliar.

You’re the one who pulls away. "I'm sorry," you say. "That's not what I want."

She’s stiff under her softness, like an examination table. "I didn’t think so. I didn't think you did that kind of thing."

You don’t. It’s the silence. Your empty floor. Her hands, resting on her lap. "I just thought…” you try. “That kind of closeness is enough for everyone else."

Your fingers are still clenched in her shirt. She looks at them until you untangle them, one by one. The knuckles don’t ache.

She shakes her head. "It's like you don't want to be better."

“That went well,” your Sick says after the door swings shut.

“It’s your fault.”

It tilts its head on a neck that’s looser than it should be. “I didn’t do anything.”

It’s right. When you were sick you could request a shoulder rub to loosen tight muscles or hike up your shirt, no seduction, no bullshit, to ask if that rash looked bad. You could open your mouth and let the truth of your predicament outweigh prudishness or shame.

You don’t know how to ask people to touch you anymore.

It leans in close. “You need me,” it says. Oil bubbles over its lips and slicks its chin. “I was always your excuse.”

That weekend you watch your phone sit silent on the table, no pings from forum posts or medication reminders. Your Sick drifts over. It’s no longer a rotting corpse leaking garbage. It looks dead in the way you used to whenever you looked in the mirror.

Wherever it is in the real world, it doesn’t look like that anymore. From what you remember from the booklets they gave you, it’s already gone.

“Not going to explain yourself, huh?” asks your hallucination. Your haunting.

You shrug. What would you say to her? I took away the foundation of my life and don’t know what’s underneath. You only started being my friend when I needed help, so what’s left for us? There was always another medication or appointment or symptom but now everything’s fine and I’m still holding my breath.

You’ve gotten used to letting someone else talk for you.

“I was killing you,” it says.

That’s what you said. You look at the lines around its eyes and imagine a billion tiny swords raised against invaders that poured in every time you took a breath to light your joints up with friendly fire. “You were protecting me.”

“I was the worst part of you.”

“You were.” You flex your perfect, painless fingers. “Do I miss it?”

It grins and leans against the back of your chair, wrapping chilly arms around your waist. “I just wanted to make you say it.”

The grip around your belly aches in a way you recognize. Dull pain that makes its home in you. Cozy as curling up in bed with a headache. You look back at your silent phone. “Which one of us did she come here for?”

“Only one way to find out.”

You could reach out, but you don’t move. You have never known how to ask for help.

Your Sick sighs. It loosens its grip and reaches over your shoulder to lace corpse-cool fingers between yours. Then it lifts your combined hands in a swoop like the first dose of anesthesia, when the orderlies wheel you away and everything is out of your control. “Come on,” she says. Her breath is a puff of disinfectant on your cheek. “Let’s do it like we used to.”

After you came out of the anesthesia, the surgeons asked if you wanted to see your old body. You said no. You’d spent long enough inside it – it was something you wanted to leave behind. Besides, even after all the pamphlets and counseling sessions, you worried seeing your vacant face would jar something loose. Convince you like those cranks on the disability forums that you’d severed a connection that was irrevocable.  

If you could do it again, you’d say yes. Step inside the morgue – no, they wouldn’t have moved it to the morgue yet, they’d want you to have a better venue to say goodbye – and catalogue the subtle changes only you could see. The swollen knuckles, flushed cheeks. All the other differences locked inside.

You imagine bending down and lifting the body the way it lifted you once, cradling its head in the crook of your arm. Imagine kissing your Sick and feeling poisonous tendrils creep down your throat to coat your insides with grime.

You imagine saying, welcome home.

(Author's note)

[beauty-and-passion]

Sanremo 2024: the songs made me do it

aka: Don’t tell me this will become a new format

There is a sad truth I have to share with you all: I don’t watch Sanremo. I know it’s unhinged and funny and every year there is a new debate about something stupid and a lot of homoerotic tension everywhere. But I don’t have the strength to stay awake until 3am, waiting for all songs and listening to covers and watching 200 interludes until morning. I am getting old, I can’t stay awake that long anymore XD

But my father and my brother both watch Sanremo and, since this year has been particularly appreciated and followed by a ton of people, they decided I had to listen to some of the songs.

So I listened to some of them, especially the top 5. And wow, they are better than I thought. It’s been quite some time since I followed some Italian music and it looks like a lot of things improved in the meantime.

Hence why I decided to give a try to all the 30 songs of this year’s competition. It was worth it: there are definitely some interesting ones. And a few artists made me re-evaluate my opinion about “veteran” singers too.

But while I was listening to all of this, I was also thinking: man, it’s a shame the rest of the world will never know about them. Some are forgettable, fine, but some are good. They deserve a chance to be heard and appreciated.

And this is when a dangerous idea popped into my mind: what if, instead of listening to all of these songs by myself, I share my opinion about them in a post? It would be a bit like my yearly “first impression post” about the Eurovision songs, only applied to Sanremo’s songs.

And hey, maybe this will become a new format. A sort of anticipation of every year’s Eurovision. After all, Sanremo came before Eurovision, so it would make sense, in a way, to talk about Sanremo first.

But that’s up to you. If you think it would be fun, if you’re interested in listening to more Italian songs, or even if you just want to read more of me rambling about stuff, let me know and I will gladly provide it.

______________________________

The overall impression

It’s quite positive. Sure, it could be because I’m Italian and I’m biased, but I swear I’m doing my best to be as objective as possible.

Also, an overall positive impression doesn’t mean all songs are bangers. They are just generally “good”. You can listen to them once or twice, but they’re not a new, groundbreaking experience: they are just okay. And you will read these words again regarding a lot of the songs on this list.

Speaking of the songs themselves, HERE you can find the full playlist.

Please notice that the order of the songs is the same as the final chart. So, since I do not want to spoil you the winner immediately, I will go in reverse order, starting from the last song up to the first. Don’t worry, there is some interesting stuff in the middle, we won’t get bored ;)

As always, this is my opinion, yadda yadda. If you disagree, good for you. We’re just talking about songs after all.

______________________________

Fred De Palma - IL CIELO NON CI VUOLE

I have no idea who this guy is and the song is acceptable: nothing too groundbreaking, nothing too bad. It’s just a typical dance song.

However, I would still keep an eye on him, because there’s this long tradition of singers who got last place, but ended up having incredibly long careers and becoming way more famous than the winners.

So who knows? Maybe Fred De Palma will be the next on the list.

Vote: maybe he will improve and become famous

__________

sangiovanni - finiscimi

Another very normal, very typical dance song. I listened to it twice, but I don’t remember a single thing. Next.

Vote: forgettable

__________

bnkr44 - GOVERNO PUNK

That’s a nice song. Again: nothing too special, but at least I remember the chorus.

Also, there are a lot of other songs that got a higher rank and bored me way faster than this one.

Vote: +1 for the chorus

__________

LA SAD - AUTODISTRUTTIVO

And suddenly, I’m a teen again. The rhythm, the lyrics, the punk, they all speak of the 2000s.

My inner teenager is singing along and loves all of this.

Vote: these guys have been inspired by Blink-182. Now I understand why they remind me so much of my adolescence.

__________

Maninni - SPETTACOLARE

Another typical love song. And it came before La Sad.

Now I’m the sad one.

Vote: even more forgettable

__________

Renga Nek - Pazzo di te

Small premise: Renga and Nek have both been around for a very long time and, as far as I know, they never made a collab together.

But while I’ve never been particularly interested in Renga’s music, Nek has a special place in my heart. Why? Because he’s my favorite Italian singer. I listened to his songs when I was a child first, then during my adolescence. After almost 20 years, I still love them and I still remember the lyrics. So I was waiting for another great song to add to my playlist.

But this song is nothing. It’s not interesting, it’s not new, it’s not a bop. It’s just a generic song about love.

What a huge disappointment, coming from two artists like them. They’ve been around for a lot of time, they should know it’s time to change. But nope, it’s as if they’re still stuck in the past, thinking that playing a song identical to what they made before will surely be appreciated.

But it’s not. The music scene changed, I changed. And this stuff is old.

Considering that we will see older artists with much more interesting songs, these two really have no excuse for this. It is just plain laziness.

Vote: listen to Le cose da difendere, instead. Or Contromano. Or L’inquietudine. They’re much better than this.

__________

CLARA - DIAMANTI GREZZI

This girl won Sanremo Giovani (the edition for younger singers) and I can understand why: she has a lot of voice and she’s a nice singer. The lyric isn’t the most original thing ever, but I like it and I think a lot of younger people can relate to it. It’s very nice and it doesn’t deserve such a low rank.

Vote: “kissing with the tongue/ is so scary”? Uuuh… I suppose young people relate to that? :/

__________

Rose Villain - CLICK BOOM!

This song is just… meh. Despite having two different rhythms, I don’t feel engaged by either of them.

Vote: and the lyrics aren’t great either

__________

BigMama - La rabbia non ti basta

1) The style, the eyes, the nails. This gal is a queen, she slays hard and I approve.

2) The song is about violence, dreams, protecting your inner child, yourself or even your past self from a past of abuse. It’s powerful and I approve.

3) The rhythm might not be the most groundbreaking thing ever, but it goes well with the song and I approve.

4) She’s great and I want to hear more songs from her.

Vote: Approved

__________

Ricchi E Poveri - Ma non tutta la vita

Ricchi e Poveri have been going around since 1967. My mother listened to them. They started as a quartet, then became two, then one of them died and now, these are the last two members left, both in their 70s.

And despite that, these two are amazing.

Their voices are still great, their song is a bop, their energy is incredible. They are much, much better than a lot of these younger singers and I would’ve never imagined that goddamn Ricchi e Poveri would sing one of my favorite songs of this year.

Sure, the ghost of Raffaella Carrà possessed this song, considering the rhythm reminds me of her famous songs, but you know what? It works well. It’s good.

And the lyrics are good too. Even if this is a romantic song, it’s also a song about wanting your own freedom: but instead of stating it loudly, it softly hints at it (“You know I’ll wait for you / but not for all of my life”). It’s nice, it’s cute, I love it.

They do not deserve this position in the final chart, so I blame people thinking they were too old to participate. I thought the same and I repent.

Vote: I wish to have at least 10% of their energy

__________

Dargen D'Amico - Onda Alta

If you don’t think this song is perfect dancing material, you’re lying.

But also consider: the lyric is about immigrants, so this song isn’t just a bop, but it’s meaningful too.

Vote: good job, my boy

__________

Negramaro - Ricominciamo tutto

Honestly, never really cared about Negramaro’s songs and this one adds to the pile.

Vote: try again next time

__________

SANTI FRANCESI - l'amore in bocca

These guys and Negramaro have a higher rank than Ricchi e Poveri. The disrespect. The ignominy.

Vote: this song is a bit better than Negramaro’s song, fine, but it’s also… just okay.

__________

Mr.Rain - DUE ALTALENE

Is… he singing with Autotune? I’m not really a fan of it because I want to hear what you can do, not what the software can do to make you sound better.

But okay, maybe it’s part of how he wanted this song, I can accept it. But still, not a fan of the song: too boring.

Vote: Next

__________

The Kolors - UN RAGAZZO UNA RAGAZZA

The music video screams ‘80s, the song screams ‘80s as well. And, like every 80s song, the chorus is extremely catchy: so catchy that, after the second listening, I was still singing it.

Curse you, catchy rhythm and catchy song that will definitely become a summer hit.

Vote: “a boy meets a girl / lips on the lips / who guess what will happen”. Jeez, wow, a real mystery.

__________

Fiorella Mannoia - Mariposa

She’s another of those veteran singers (69 years old). And, once again, she slays harder than a lot of the younger artists.

I listened to this song once and fell in love immediately. The lyrics are beautiful: HERE you can read the English translation and I highly suggest it, because the song is full of beautiful images and harmonies.

But that’s not just the lyrics, it’s how she sings it. And she sings it with passion and pride. It wouldn’t be as effective, sung by a younger, softer voice: this songs needs a powerful, deep voice and Fiorella is perfect for it.

Vote: it deserves everything.

__________

Emma - APNEA

Look me in the eye, then explain how this comes before Fiorella Mannoia.

You can listen to this song on every radio everywhere: it’s not original, not funny and the lyrics are meh.

Also, couldn’t she find a way to fit the word “apnea” better? To me, it looks like she suddenly remembered and put it at the end of the verse (“you take my breath away/apnea”). I don’t know, it gives me the idea she hasn’t thought too much about it.

Vote: I couldn’t listen to this song more than twice - and the second time I was fed up already

__________

Diodato - Ti muovi

Apologies to all of his fans, but I never loved Diodato’s songs. Even when I won, I asked myself why: what do people find in this guy? Why do they love his songs so much?

Personally, I find this extremely boring.

Vote: this came before Fiorella Mannoia. The utter disrespect.

__________

Il Tre - FRAGILI

This song is La Sad without the punk. And I’ve always preferred the punk over this stuff.

Vote: punk > this

__________

Gazzelle - Tutto Qui

This song was so utterly boring, I barely managed to do a full listening.

Vote: how did these people get such high places in the final rank?!

__________

ALFA - Vai!

I don’t know who this guy is, but I LOVE his song. Good vibes, a carefree rhythm and a great message about living your life to the fullest. It makes me want to go out and explore new things. I want it as the theme song for every summer and every time I visit a new place.

Give this boy a chance, you might find your next happy song.

Vote: thank you for the happy vibes

__________

Alessandra Amoroso - Fino a qui

And here it is: the only song of the entire list that was so devastatingly boring, I didn’t even manage to finish one full listening.

Vote: Sorry Alessandra, but this is really bad. It doesn’t deserve the top 10.

__________

Il Volo - Capolavoro

Guys, your voices are still good, but this song is very VERY boring. And the lyrics are boring too.

Also, what the fuck does it even mean “you fall from the sky like a masterpiece”?! Every time I listen to it, I keep imagining paintings falling from the sky and I’m too perplexed and conflicted and also frustrated because this song is booooring.

Vote: you fall from the sky like a huge question mark

__________

Loredana Bertè - Pazza

Loredana is another veteran. She’s 73 and yet, look at her: way younger than the youngest singers. She has an attitude, she’s sassy, she’s confident. We all stan her.

Also, her song is about loving yourself and learning how to love yourself. And I’m pretty sure that this song, sung by a different voice, wouldn’t be so powerful. It needs such a powerful, “scratchy” voice.

Despite that, Loredana only got 7th place. And that’s a problem, because she said she wanted to win, to go to Eurovision and “mess with my ex-husband and the Swedish king”.

So, since this is an extremely valid reason and we all approve of it, I highly suggest the winner take Loredana and bring her to Sweden. She deserves to go around and wreak havoc. I want to see the poor Swedes dealing with her. I want to see her ex-husband quiver in fear. I want to see the Swedish king ask: “who are you and how did you enter my place?”. I want Loredana to take control of Sweden with her sassiness.

Vote: San Marino, you know what you have to do.

__________

Mahmood - TUTA GOLD

This is the reason I wanted to write this post.

Mahmood won two times already and both times he made good songs. He clearly proved he’s a good singer and I’m glad he gets the recognition he deserves.

When I listened to this song for the first time, it gave me chills. It’s interesting, it’s captivating. It’s full of images associated with his life in the suburbs and things he’s probably the only one to understand.

I think he came 6th, only because he won two times already and winning a third time would’ve been too much. But he still deserves all the recognition, so please listen to his song. It’ll be worth it.

Vote: in my final rank, he’s definitely top 3

__________

Irama - Tu no

I have another secret to share: I don’t like Irama’s songs. I know people like him, but I really cannot understand why. He has an interesting voice, sure. And fine, despite being a hugely boring romantic ballad, at least he sings it with passion.

But it’s a lament. Fine, the chorus is okay, but it became okay only after four listenings.

Vote: my brother loves this song and he’s a ballad lover. So I suppose people who love ballads love Irama? That’s how he got 5th place?

__________

Ghali - CASA MIA

A song about equality and against all wars. And not only the lyrics are very clear about it (“with imaginary lines, you bomb a hospital/for a piece of land or for a piece of bread”), but Ghali himself was very clear too, since he said “stop the genocide” right after his performance.

Somehow, a debate started over this. And hear this: it started because the Israeli ambassador got offended and said something like “he shouldn’t use the stage to say this”.

Yes, this is the stupidest thing you will read today and I can’t believe I just wrote it.

But hey, Ghali probably thought it was stupid too, since his reply was something like: “I’m sorry he got offended, what offended him, anyway? That I used my stage to give a message of peace? What should’ve used the stage for instead?” which proves:

he’s an absolute king

he’s much more mature than the supposed adults involved who are way older than him

Now, I know nothing about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and I don’t want to express any opinion about who is “right” or “wrong” here. But if you get offended over something like “stop the genocide”, then you have something to hide. It’s not rocket science, it’s evident.

And considering we can all see how heavy and uncontrollable the Israeli bombardment is, what do they think we should say? That it’s fine, keep going?

Even war has its rules. And bombing everything, especially civilians, isn’t part of them. It doesn’t matter how “right” you are or how wronged you feel: once you hit your enemy like this, you are automatically wrong. It’s as if the Allies exterminated all Germans during WW2: it never happened, because even something awful like war has a limit and a decency.

And if you don’t feel like people should express their opinion about war, then think twice: despite our issues, we still have freedom of speech in Italy. So if an artist wants to express an anti-war idea, they’re free to do it whatever and whenever they want. End of the discussion.

Vote: I bet you all forgot the manatee-looking alien. Yes, there was a manatee-looking alien.

__________

Annalisa - Sinceramente

This song came before Mahmood.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good song. You can dance to it, I danced to it too. It’s catchy, I’m sure it will be a huge hit and I love it. And she’s great too.

But it came before Mahmood.

Vote: can we switch? Mahmood 3rd place and this 6th? Or 5th and move Irama down?

__________

Geolier - I P’ ME, TU P’ TE

You have no idea how curious I was to hear this song.

All I knew about this guy, was that he got 60% from the televoting. More than half of Italy voted for him. Why? Who is he? What kind of song did he ever sing? I needed to listen to it!

And now I did. And, well, it became clear why it got so much attention.

Geolier sings by using the Neapolitan dialect. Except for three lines in the chorus in Italian, the rest of the song is in Neapolitan.

And this is incredibly interesting because the Neapolitan dialect is probably the most well-known dialect here in Italy. I think everyone knows or, at least, understands a bit of it. But even if I can understand it and even if I listened to this song a lot of times already, I still don’t get all the words. And I doubt others fully understand it (except for, well, Neapolitans). It’s a bit of a linguistic challenge, it’s fun.

And yes, I know this song would’ve never been Eurovision material, but imagine. Just imagine this song, on the international stage. The sheer confusion of the rest of the world. I mean, my father thought he was singing “in some weird English dialect from some island” and he spent 50 years in Italy. Just imagine a completely clueless person who knows nothing about Italian dialects.

And this is why you should listen to it and see what you can understand. Come on, give it a try! And even if you don’t understand a thing, at least you will hear a song about a breakup, the end of an abusive relationship and the need to take different ways. Which is still related to the love theme, but at least it talks about a different aspect of it.

Vote: absolutely deserved 2nd place. Maybe even the 1st place, just to witness Europe’s confusion while listening to it.

__________

Angelina Mango - La noia

When I did my first listening to the top 5 songs, my brother made me listen to them in random order. So I listened to Geolier first, then this one.

Geolier is clearly very southern: I mean, he sings in a southern dialect. But then I listened to this woman and not only she has a southern Italian accent, but she also uses a very clear southern rhythm for the song.

So can we consider this year’s Sanremo a victory for south Italy? Definitely. The rhythm is immaculate and yes, I know there are a lot of nice songs from north Italy too, but the south always had that magical, dance-y rhythm and I’m glad it was so well appreciated.

The lyric are very interesting too, because it’s a celebration of boredom. Boredom is essential for growth, it’s part of us and we need to embrace it, because it helps us - and that’s not what she says, but what biology says. We need moments of boredom: to recharge ourselves, to relax, to let new projects and ideas stem from it. We need boredom, just like we need to keep ourselves active.

It’s nice to see a song with a very different theme, with a rhythm that is both new and old, with a great lyric and a good singer. I’m very glad she won: people have great taste and that’s always nice to see that.

Vote: my father (aka the Eurovision prophet) already said she might win Eurovision. Italy’s new victory in less than 30 years? I’m all for it.

[thepeanutbutterwizard]

Saw something on r/theowlhouse that kinda annoyed me, but reddit isn't letting me comment on it so I'm gonna ramble here

The post was asking who would win, the Gaang from A:TLA or the Hexsquad, and the resounding response was that it was the Gaang, no contest, (someone made a Hydrogen bomb vs coughing baby comparison) and that Toph especially would be able to sweep the Hexsquad 1 v 5 easily which...no?

That's a fight that seems pretty evenly matched to me?

Not a Toph v Hexsquad, Hexsquad would easily win that, seriously, but a Gaang v Hexsquad seems like a fair, matched fight.

And the thing that really annoyed me was so many people specifically saying Toph would solo Willow no question, which is also so mind boggling to me bc like...plants bust through earth? All the time? It's like their thing?

All Willow would have to do to beat Toph would be to grow a tree underneath her, and trap her 30 feet away from the earth. Toph would be completely powerless without any earth she could bend, and she can't see through wood, so she would be completely blind and would have a really difficult time getting down without help.

If anyone in the Gaang would be able to 1 v 1 Willow and win, it would probably be Katara, since her waterbending gives her the ability to hijack Willows vines through the water in them, or even just pull all the water out of them and kill them.

Although, hurting or killing Willows plants like that could send her into a glowy eyed curb stomping rage, which could be enough to overwhelm Katara regardless.

I'm not saying that that means the Hexsquad would stomp the Gaang, or that Willow could 1 v 5 the Gaang or anything, but Hexsquad v Gaang seems like it would be pretty even to me, and I'm not sure what everyone over on reddit is thinking.

Or am I the one not making sense?

[never-not-ever]

long complainy ramble about family 🙃

It's my own fault for offering to help my cousin but Thursday-Monday I'm doing so much both for and with her. I wrote up so much in my notes app that I was just going to transfer here but it's so much useless/too much info lol. Basically I offered to babysit my 1 year old nephew on Saturday while she helps someone move. She'll be gone for like 6 hours which isn't that bad but I'm a little worried watching him BUT we also just realized today that I'll be watching him while this older lady is at her house.. it's a long complicated story. But I was on the phone with my cousin and I was like "I was already feeling eh about Saturday and now I have to be there with some random lady who I don't know?!? Ughhh"...

I'm also driving up there on Friday to pick up my older nephew who is staying upstairs with my Nana for the weekend and driving him back on Monday (was going to be Sunday but he has no school Monday and my cousin asked if I could watch him Monday while she works cause supposedly my Nana has plans 🙃).

Oh and I'm supposed to be hanging out with my cousin tomorrow and it was going to just be for like an hour (she didn't want to be home alone and asked if I wanted to hang, another long story but basically she ruminates, worries, and stresses about her boyfriend being sneaky so she likes the company/distraction...). Like now that I moved this to it's own post I can ramble on.. But the original plan was that no, I can't come hang out cause Nana needs the car to go visit her brother. He lives halfway to my cousins house so she said "what if you dropped Nana off (she needs to be there at 11) and then go pick her up after. Fine. But my Nana went from "I'll probably be done by 2" to "if I need to leave at 1, cause Uncle may need to rest, could you come back and get me then". So that means I wouldn't get to my cousins til 11:30, possibly have to leave at 12:30 to get my Nana at 1. IT JUST DIDN'T MAKE SENSE!!!!!! I'm complaining about it and as I'm typing it out I'm like this really isn't that big of a deal, you sound like a dramatic crybaby. But like after helping her out so much with her 1 year olds birthday party last Saturday I couldn't wait for all my obligations to finally, finally be over...

Then my dumbass goes and offers up more help to her. Like she has a stressful life right now. Being around her I'm constantly reminded of that. We talk a lot on the phone so I'm listening to it all. I'm glad we've gotten close and don't get me wrong as much as I complain it's not 100% a one-sided relationship. We talk about other stuff too but the majority of it is her life and her drama and some of it is getting to be too much for me to witness. I really don't want to talk too much more about it (I say, as I continue to type paragraphs) but my older nephew has so many behavioral and mental issues and my cousin is so stressed out about it but at the same time when I'm with them and I hear the fighting I cringe because- I don't even know why. I can't explain it. Then on top of that she has a dog that I hardly see cause it's usually locked in the bathroom cause she's kind of untrained and a terror and with the 1 year old baby out and about it's hard. But my cousin has had so many dogs and they never work out and her Aunt who lives with her/is moving on Saturday is the only one who takes care of the dog but it's my cousin and her boyfriends dog. My cousin is always complaining about the dog and I love animals and hate that the dog is never out.

UGHHH it's like so much complaining. I listen to it all the time. I hear fighting, and screaming, and it's sort of a reminder of my childhood. And at the same time it's like she has all this stress in her life and I have nothing. Except for a brain that hates me and tries to kill me at times. Like my depression and SI... for what? Whenever I've gone inpatient in the past I never was as close to my cousin as I am now but like all I can think about is how easy I have it and how simple my life is right now. She talks about being depressed, hating her life, suicide, but she can't cause she has a new baby who she is so in love with. She has a lot of struggles and has even said it before about wishing she could go into the hospital at times to get help but she can't. Then here I am nonchalantly, always in the back of my mind wondering when that inevitable return is going to happen.

[conhivemindcent]

This is long and rambly, sorry if it makes little sense

So one of the members of 1D died. Liam Payne.

I have learnt in the hourish of his death that he was a troubled person. A kid in the spotlight. He abused someone. He was a father. And now people are mourning. Mostly the memory of who he used to be. I don’t know, I was never really into 1D.

But I am from the UK. Same as 1D.

I know there are plenty of UK fans who will wake up in 7 hours and learn one of the people they looked up to in childhood is dead. I doubt some of them will be adults. I’m not even 20, and they were huge when I was 10. The media will likely have a huge focus on it for a while. After all, 1D was one of our most successful boy bands.

And I hope they will be doing ok.

I hope my friends from primary school that I have fallen out of touch with will do ok.

Also TMZ.

Terrible record with reporting celebrity death. They have reported deaths without informing next of kin. Considering his death would’ve been reported at probably 11pm ish in the UK, I know at least someone who was close with Payne will probably learn through the news or social media he died. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve repeated it and reported his death without next of kin knowing.

They’ve also been terrible with reporting suicides. I know it’s not confirmed if it was accidental or intentional (and I hope it was accidental personally) but I still feel like it needs to be said. They’re very sensational with suicide and stuff.

Idk I’m rambling. I just have a lot of thoughts, like recognising grief, morning and the attached love with acknowledgement of awful actions; how 1D was still a part of my childhood even though I didn’t care for it; and learning a lot more about Liam Payne and TMZ in the past hour than I would’ve liked.

I can’t quite believe he’s dead. As mentioned earlier, I’m not 20 yet. Would’ve thought one of them would die when I was at least in my mid 30s or something.

Also last note: jokes about his death. I find it kinda disrespectful, but I’m not surprised. Tumblr lives for joking about death and the dead and for 1 dimensional thinking in black and white. You’re either Madonna or Whore here. I won’t be shocked when people idealise and mourn one part of Payne in his wholeness and demonise and “haha fuck you” joke about another part.

Anyway I’m tired, going to bed