#do i have aphantasia

[townofcrosshollow]

Wait am I supposed to be able to see images when I imagine things, like are colours supposed to show up as if they are in front of my eyes when I imagine things

[jet-teeth]

Specifically relating to my latest post, but in general also: I feel like my attention span has gotten so bad these days in terms of actually finishing anything, to the point that the deflection/procrastination-projects get as silly as "builds a whole-ass 3D model instead of finishing the goddamn drawing because that's somehow easier than dealing with the perfectionism demon hovering over my shoulder when I draw these days"

(I think this why I'm trying to chase looser styles/play around with traditional media here and there again, since anything too precise starts to activate the Overthink Demon. I guess what I post is "oops! All sketches" anyway, but a lot of things still get overworked. Probably should start using timers again or something idk) Rarely do I actually "finish" models as well, which is generally why I don't post any (they are almost always studies/character reference models) but let's see if I can get around to making some Printable Little Guys this year, since frankly I find 3D a more comfortable medium to work in than outright painting/doing rendered-out stuff

Ramble post, but I'm always interested in the topic of "process" when it comes to art, and how struggles & limitations might actually help an individual find what their strengths really are too (or, just reveal areas that need more work. I DO want to finish a couple of the paintings in my WIP folder, but I also have accepted that it's not gonna be the natural medium for me ever) (I always try to include art in long text posts like this so they aren't as boring. Have a Banana Cat drawing I never uploaded. Also yes the printer HAS been added to my enclosure and it's great fun :> )

[spacizia]

that weird guy from archives who dumped an entire conspiracy on you (except he’s right)

[simplydnp]

why am i half awake hallucinating the reykjavik preshow 😂

[remyfire]

Yesterday one of my managers asked me if I have any particular skills or passions that might be relevant to the job so that she could tailor projects to fit me better. I was very cool and winning and interesting and essentially said, "Please give me any tedious boring tasks and all the data entry you can handle. Also I type real fast." I think I'm making a great impression on everybody as a neat, awe-inspiring person.

[ragnars-tooth]

so very quick and sketchy but i was getting vague designs for all the tldc ladies down in one place

not so sure on gwendolen and gwilanna and i havent looked back at the books for details yet but these were just a quick cool down for the night 🫶

[random-fun-polls]

do u think of numbers in a spherical way? like there's just ..circles in ur minds eye to conceptualize/visualize the math problem or whatever, even when it's not actually about a circle

yes

no

[feral-ass-raccoon]

having aphantasia is so fuckin trippy actually bc i just

- what do you mean when people said "picture this" they meant it. like actually meant it in a literal sense

- yea i know my oc's designs in theory obviously but when i put it down on paper it doesn't look right. no i can't 'see' it in my mind. what

- do i know what my conscience[s] are saying??? yes. am i actually hearing them??? no wtf [not sure if this counts since i think aphantasia is more about the visual thinking but oh well]

- can i describe a honeycrisp apple in extreme detail?? also yes. no i am not seeing the apple i just know what it looks like

- people with photographic memories. that cannot be real. what in the actual fuck you can pull up images of things you've seen/done on command?????? there's no way

idk its just wild that some people can see things. in their head. when they think abt it. sounds fake but okay

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is not realizing that everyone related or self-projected into romance in media, not just appreciating the relationship as a separate and fictional thing. (im arospec but yea, didnt know that ppl projected themselves onto the characters when they have a relationship what the heck. is that why there is so many unnecessary romance scenes?)

.

[aashiqui-aashiqui]

is it normal to forget what you look like unless staring at a picture or reflection

[s-ccaam-era-crepe]

[ID: An image with five silhouettes of heads showing different apples. Choice 1 is shown as a hyper-realistic red apple with shading and color, 2 as a slightly less realistic apple with less shading, 3 as the same apple as 2 but in black and white, 4 as the outline of the apple with no color, and 5 as no visual apple. End ID]

asking bc i found out i have aphantasia recently (no visual) and did not realize people can See the things they are visualizing in their minds. for reference i'm a 5 (completely dark/no visual and only think about the apple w/ concepts)

[straightlightyagami]

If anyone who sees this has aphantasia, does it affect what math you are able to do? I imagine geometry, maybe some other math too, would be harder to do.

[merge-conflict]

wrote another little piece thinking about valentine post-ending dealing with what remains of johnny in her head, and how she gets out of the medical research floor but part of her head stays there, right? so she's talking to goro some time when she's having a bad brain day and voices her ever-present concern "how do I know this is real? how do I know this all isn't a test to see if I react the way arasaka thinks I should? if they're testing my loyalty?" and that thought feels paranoid in the bright light of the day but a lot more real at 11pm in her own small room alone with a man she can't show her true feelings for or else risk shortening both their leashes. and in the end goro manages to convince her that they're both real and what's happening to them is real, and he does that by being vulnerable in a way that she knows arasaka would never script for her.

and that just really makes me think of certain types of discomfort, or a narrow view on the world always show through in stories. it reminds me of older scifi stories which could imagine fantastical technologies but never the dissolution of the nuclear family. you look back at some stories and see the queer undertones immediately and think "how could someone not know" but it was so foreign to them they couldn't even conceive of it. anyway it's fascinating to think that valentine believes that arasaka would mess with her head and test her in fucked up ways, but they would never be able to accurately capture the way goro desperately wants to touch her. and yeah of course it's a gender thing.

[appalamutte]

omg. when y’all say “this writing is so good i can see it perfectly in my head” that’s not…..that’s not a metaphor?? y’all are ACTUALLY seeing the scene play out like a movie in your head while reading?

[umilily]

you ever have a thought that's so groundbreaking to you, but the most basic conclusion from a logical point of view? like, how has this never occurred to me before????

[thesweetestsupervillains]

Blog Update

// Okay, so, since my accounts are spread out, I'm going to consolidate them here, I think, since I have a community for Gina.

That means that I'll be adding Kara Killgrave as a main muse here, and I think I'll probably also add Beelzebub as one, possibly?

And then I'll have some side muses that I use occasionally.

The main issue is that right now, neither Gina nor Kara have enough interest from people in terms of writing threads to make having separate blogs worth it.

So Gina isn't going anywhere, I'm just going to add to this account.