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lxvvie · 3 months ago

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Oh, König, König, König...

You tell your gremlin bigfoot of a husband that it's time you two part ways and you could hear a mouse piss on cotton.

König stares at you for a minute or two. Or ten. Then he grins, a little too strained, a little too... happy.

And then, "Oh, Schatz, what terrible jokes you tell." (ʘ‿ʘ)

Um... but you weren't joking, though. König couldn't give a damn and he went about his business. Being your husband that is. And so he went about doing his husbandly duties. Loudly. So all the world can know who you're married to.

Oh, Schatz, here's your lunch, courtesy of your husband who was available to bring it to you today because he missed you so and he's home for the time being!

What's that, his darling? Your job is doing a potluck today? Is that one coworker you hate bringing the same thing they usually bring? Oh, he wasn't supposed to say that out loud? König, your husband, whom you confided this to? Oh, whatever shall you do?

Oh, you two are separated? Nonsense, Schatz. Last time König checked, you two still stayed in the same house. Together. As a couple. Separate bedrooms? Pfft, it's only because your sleeping schedules are different. Besides, it isn't an issue when you want to have sex, now is it? ...Oh! He spoke out loud again, didn't he? Whoops.

You're going out with your friends? Mm? Friend? Singular? Oh, how nice, Schatz. You aren't coming home tonight? Funny. Do you think your friend can do what König can? Do you think he can fuck you silly like your husband did? LAST NIGHT?

AND THIS MORNING BEFORE WORK? AND IN YOUR FAVORITE POSITION, TOO?

Oh, Schatz, what terrible jokes you tell. But go on, see if your friend can do better.

...Wait, König wasn't supposed to say that out loud, was he?

Whoops. (ʘ‿ʘ)

#do NOT do this ever in life. EVER.#nsfw.#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty modern divorcefare.#könig #konig #konig x reader #konig x you #könig x reader #könig x you #call of duty x reader #call of duty x you #cod x reader #cod x you #x black reader #x poc reader #x plus size reader #kortac

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annabelle--cane · 1 year ago

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her pronouns are HE/HIM

#I do actually think it's neat on both a character and representation level #that steven only ever objects to being called rose/pink and never says anything about pronouns. however I think this is a funny joke.#steven universe #id in alt text #marina marvels at life

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symphonyofsilence · 2 months ago

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Let the poor man rest.

#also no he doesn't want to experience life as a normal person. no he wouldn't sacrifice his powers to live again.#he LOVED being powerful. he was very proud of his powers. he was at the top of the world. what he disliked was being so lonely at the top.#which having reunited with Geto now he is not.#and he wanted to keep the next generation safe due to his past regrets and teach a generation of kids to be at the top together.#and he wanted to get rid of the corrupt higher-ups and reform the Jujutsu society.#and he did all of that. Yuta and Yuuji are both alive and safe and the kids are all reunited with each other stronger than ever #and the higher-ups are d**d.#Gojo obviously wouldn't hate to keep living. he clearly didn't expect to lose and die. but as he himself confirmed #he died doing what he loved. he went out the way he wanted. he went out with a bang. he had the best fight of his life and gave it his all.#as he said 'he had fun'. he said it would have been embarrassing if he died of old age or sickness.#and now that he's gone he's happy with his friends and especially Geto. he found peace.#He said it himself 'Now i'm wishing that it's not just a dream'.#also for those of you who say that Geto & Gojo wouldn't be together because one would go to hell and one to heaven... no. just no.#first of all. Gojo did a mass m*r*** before his death #second of all. they're Buddhists. they don't have heaven and hell. don't bring Abrahamic religions into everything.#and you'd be surprised by the excuses the Abrahamic religions find to not let people in heaven.#probably Gojo wouldn't go to heaven even if he didn't kill the higher-ups due to...idk... occasionaly doing pranks or sth.#but Gege apparently created a whole other afterlife of his own. and Toji Geto Gojo Nanami and everyone were all gathered there together.#you SAW that. so stop.#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #jjk gojo #gege akutami #my two cents #satosugu

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juiche · 10 months ago

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a moment of peace before the whole world shatters 😇

get your own print here ❤️

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isjasz · 6 months ago

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Stellar death

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nicecrumbart · 5 months ago

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Keep thinking about that one scene in secret life

#it was so silly i've had this visualised in my head for ages #actually sick of this comic now tho the colouring made me question tf I've been doing for 10 years #anyway #the sillies #not set on any of these designs btw and Scott isn't in his band outfit BC he isn't part of it yet in the series #which is the excuse I'm using bc I haven't solidified that design yet #tag time #secret life #life series #scott smajor #smajor1995 #trafficblr #jimmy solidarity #goodtimeswithscar #this probably the second comic I've ever finished ever so #IM LEARNING OK #fandumb fanart #ALSO ALSO guess where I got the death messages the

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imperceiveable · 2 months ago

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#furry art #mouse furry #digital illustration #character art #anthropomorphization #my art #time to be cringe i dont know life is not so serious sometimes #also being able to draw furries can come in handy if ill ever do commissions #also it’s fun #also please dont look too much at the hand i drew holding the utensils it’s.. something

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reasonsforhope · 8 months ago

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Sometimes you just have one of those moments where the progress we've made as a culture get thrown into stark relief. You look at something and go "Holy shit, that would never have happened when I was a kid."

Today, I had one of those moments when I realized that the teenage boys I'm working with are just. genuinely, openly enthusiastic about going to Build-a-Bear for their outing.

These are sixteen and seventeen year old boys! They just had a whole conversation about what to name their "cute", mostly new squishmallows! They're genuinely excited that they're going to Build-a-Bear this weekend and asking other kids to pick up specific accessories for them!!

Holy shit, that never would've happened when I was 16. None of the boys would have dared to be visibly interested - and neither would most of the girls! There would have been a million gay jokes and "Haha, you're a girl" jokes and "What are you, a baby?" jokes. Teenagers weren't even supposed to care about anything back then!

Less than 15 years later, and I'm watching three 17 year old boys treat all that as not even worthy of comment.

So let's call that a reason for hope. Even when the kids aren't alright, in some ways apparently they are alright. Go Gen Z, honestly. It's so lovely to watch you guys just openly doing and saying stuff that, when I was a teen, would've been a social death sentence.

#obligatory disclaimer that this really really obviously is not universal #I do live in a major progressive city #there's definitely a level of a liberal bubble effect here #but it's still really powerful to see it #because even in a major liberal enclave there were so many limits on the gender roles and homophobia etc. etc. fronts #and also the limits of the oppressive weight of obligatory teen apathy lol #seriously go gen z. so glad you guys decided cringe is dead. I love you for that so much #and I love it for you #not news #life #hope #homophobia #sexism #teens #teenagers #progress #gen z #btw if it wasn't clear I'm a #millennial #plush toy #plushie #squishmallows #build a bear #stuffed animal #like the idea of almost any teenager much less teenage boys #saying IN FRONT OF THEIR PEERS #that they are excited about their STUFFED ANIMALS #when I was a teenager #?????#cannot imagine that ever happening.

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vaxxman · 2 months ago

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"Do you miss the time when you used to do no harm?"

Old habits.

Merc behaviour is based on a nice little comment @up-in-flames-writing left on one of my comics :)

Rambling and more silly drawings below.

Loosely based on the Solemn Vow's public blurb:

Art lovers will cherish the bust of Hippocrates, commemorating a time when the Medic still thought doing no harm was a good idea.

I am absolutely convinced that Medic carries dextrose drops with him. German pharmacies throw these after you when you buy anything at all. I went to check if this one specific brand I know of had been around since the 60s and 70s and yes, it was.

Small acts of kindness I can see Medic doing is giving everyone one of these if they are tired. I'm talking about Engineer mostly.

Or they snack on them when solving practical problems together, like during the teleporter bread tumor incident.

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #tf2 medic #tf2 scout #tf2 heavy #tf2 spy #tf2 archimedes #tf2 sniper #tf2 pyro #tf2 demoman #tf2 engineer #*Vaxx leans out of the head canon window with this one*#A lot going on in the second half; if it's hard to follow: I'm trying to contrast medic keeping candy in his office despite no kids around #against his disregard to the hippocratic oath/suggestion #Why would he keep doing this general-practicioner-core thing but not the bare necessity for keeping his medical license?#I want to convey that him losing his license was nothing surprising because #in his mind the oath was always ever a mere suggestion hence it wasn't actually a big change in his values #the punchline is that there's no contrast: keeping candy in the office is just as much of a habit as is not following the hippocratic oath #When I found out about the Solemn Vow's description text I spent minutes thinking about the implications behind that #Herr Doktor what happened in your life; did nothing happen at all; did you change or were you always like this and just came to realisation #what made you stop being wholesome and choose violence

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nezhanetwork · 8 months ago

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distant memory

#hermitcraft #hermitcraft s10 #smallishbeans #ldshadowlady #joel smallishbeans #lizzie ldshadowlady #jizzie #my art #firstly yes i do watch hc10 im just fighting my uni and losing hopelessly atm #secondly did you ever think that secret life was the last time c!joel saw c!lizzie

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tariah23 · 8 months ago

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The manga industry, especially JUMP, needs to hurry up and do away with weekly scheduling for mangaka. There needs to better regulations put into place for their health and safety because this is pitiful. Two weeks - monthly updates should’ve already been the standard for the manga industry at this point. These money grabbers will only continue to put the lives of these artists at stake for the sake of capitalism unless some serious changes are implemented.

#it’s just???#at the end of the day all these people want to do is draw and write their stories and share them with the world #why is death from stress the end game for so many of them #this should not be part of the package when finally deciding that this is what you want to do with your life #rambling #I still never got over miura’s passing man #and Togashi is still here but he’s been suffering from the consequences of overwork #it’s just… all so bleak #fans just need to learn to be patient if these changes are ever made and to be respectful #your fav series is not gonna die just because you can’t get it right now #I’m glad that gege does this now like he takes a break every 2-3 chapters and that’s good #this should be normalized

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aimasup · 1 month ago

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"And by god, did he want to feel special."

Ford's corrected plenty of teachers who wrote the question on the board wrong before, but Ford didn't expect the Muse of Knowledge to even be capable of that, much less to catch it...

Okay now let's be real, besides the chess games, I feel like Bill would've, on rare enough occasions to be special, dangle other wins in front of Ford to really make sure that portal gets completed. Only the best carrots on a stick for his hardworking puppet <3 let's make him feel like an equal to a god for fun

And Bill intended for his home dimension's last atom to be just another carrot, but what happened was Ford brought out a side of him without even trying when no one else in a trillion+ years could

Like he definitely looked back at that moment (when he got so comfortable mid-convo that on a whim, he whipped out his past and gave answers less cryptic than usual) and said 'i planned that! I said all those things to make him more attached to me!'

maybe he's right, who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

also don't bother googling those math terms i made them the fuck up

#do i even tag this as billford if it's just straight up canon #like i love that they don't have to be romantic. they're just queer and it's right there in the text #gravity falls #billford #bill cipher #stanford pines #bill being open for the first time in his life ever: haha i'm so good at manipulation! this guy is EATING it up!#yes you are bill. yes you are #my art #my post #ramblings

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coddda · 4 months ago

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