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lalunanymph · 10 months ago

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𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐃𝐄 𝟏: 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐇

after a scandal that rocks the entire nation, itadori 'ryomen' sukuna is forced to marry a girl chosen by his brother in order to straighten him out. but, what jin doesn't expect is how much he's willing to destroy everything he knows just to get his freedom back—even at the expense of breaking his wife's soul.

warnings: misogyny, talks of ageism, unrequited love, dubious cheating, gaslighting, mentions of a/nal, e/xplicit smut, mentions of w/eed, mentions of a/lcohol, substance a/buse, toxic family dynamics, class differences, sukuna is anti-noveau riche, sukuna is a walking red flag, jin itadori supremacy, hiromi and nanami duke it out in court, exposition, mentions of a m/urder, negligence, court cases, MDNI

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Treading the world of marriage as a woman past her prime in a judgemental upper class society was a dance that left you exhausted and skittish; wishing you could put an end to its haunting melody.

As you were ticking fast past the rotten age of twenty-seven, your family’s empire hung by a thread as nervous investors and stakeholders started to ask the golden question: When will your only daughter get married, Jiro?

Suitors knocked on your door, only to be turned away by your snobbish mother and your equally weak-kneed father who tried to appease her. None of them good enough for you; handsome enough for you or rich enough to grow your family’s vaults.

That was until Itadori Jin reached out to your family with an offer your father could not refuse.

His older twin brother, Itadori Sukuna, has just been released from an investigation and needed a bride to save the family name.

They wanted to paint him in a good light to the press: partying bad boy turned a charming, married man who was now working towards building a family with another girl of his standing.

And, that was when you came into the picture.

The first time you saw Itadori “Ryomen” Sukuna was a moment you would never forget.

The tattoos swirling around his face should’ve given you pause; made you backtrack on the idea of marriage to the Itadori house the second it left your father’s lips—especially when it came to a man like him.

In his neatly pressed white button-down which strained over his (admittedly) impressive pecs, and pair of expensive Bottega slacks, he would’ve been the picture of sophisticated upper class if it weren’t for the tribal lines on his face and arms—the sight almost making you high tail it out of the cafe you were both seated in.

It was the first time you were meeting him without your parents to chaperone. Bodyguards stood by the doors, stationed close by in case the press got too nosy.

With this being the first time you were talking to him without your mother lingering in the background, you were free to eye him up and down, unsure of what to make of the disdain setting his mouth into a hard line.

He was different from the men you had encountered before. Tall in an imposing way and with his shock of pink hair, you could spot him from a mile away in the middle of a crowded room. Sukuna carried himself with an air of princely cruelty, often staring down the line of his nose; astride the white stead of his borned privilege and high position in society.

But, the one thing that stood out were his eyes.

The warmest brown dissolved into a shade of vermillion which shone blood-red under different lights.

You couldn’t quite keep your eyes off them or stare at them for too long, and you sensed rather than knew how much he enjoyed your discomfort.

He swivels his coffee, spilling some down the pristine white cup. Somewhere behind him, a guard stifles a yawn.

“So… what do you like to do for fun?”

You sit up straighter, practiced to perfection with your reply. “I love watching horse races, Itadori-san. On some days, I prefer pottery and painting. I’ve always wanted to open my own art gallery.”

He glances at his nails, looking almost bored. “And why didn’t you open your own gallery?”

It’s a cordial question at best, but you bristle as if he had just mocked your interests.

“I… don’t have the time,” you mutter meekly.

He looks up at you, and you think he might finally unleash the scathing remark he’s been holding back for the last few minutes.

“What does a prissy girl like you know about not having time? I thought you thrived on wasting your life away with hot pilates classes and private-jetting to islands?”

You bite back your fuming reply, masking your discomfort with a bright smile. “Itadori-san, you judge me so harshly. I only attend one hot pilates class per week.”

What you hoped was a light-hearted reply dissolves into a sour note when he sighs and sits back, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Look, sweetheart. I know this can’t be easy on you, too, but you don’t know what’s at stake here.” Sukuna leans forward, invading your space with the spicy sweetness of his cologne. “I have a reputation to change and you have daddy’s money to keep. We’re both each other’s salvation from the shit our family put us through so I need you to work with me here.”

You frown, unsure of what he was trying to get at. “But, I am trying to work with you. I’m here on this date, aren’t I?”

“You gotta look decent,” he doesn’t beat around the bush. Gesturing to your modest midi floral dress and neutral beige Mary Janes, the look of disgust on his face breaks something in your chest. “You’re dressed like a goddamn Mormon college girl. For someone very rich, you sure don’t have taste.”

Offended, you stared at him, unable to fathom what he had just said—how he had just insulted you unprompted and in broad daylight.

But, Sukuna doesn't give you time to revel in his words. He grabs a cigarette from his pocket, ignores your wrinkling nose as he smokes openly in this establishment. The waiters don’t dare to cross him, pretending the smell of tobacco doesn’t faze them.

You, however, were finding it harder to mask your disgust. For the sake of your mother’s excitement at finding you a suitable match, you tried to tame down the anger frothing in your veins, slapping on a sweet, yet sardonic smile.

“And what is your definition of ‘taste’, Itadori-san?”

He peers at you over the veil of smoke, taking his time to piece together his reply. “Plunging necklines. Satin. Bows. Thinner heels. I need a mature woman by my side, not some plain old maid playing dress up as a prepubescent girl.”

His words stung, and you leaned back, suddenly feeling too small. The cafe lights felt like a pair of microscopic lenses studying your every move, highlighting your discomfort and sudden unease. Your skin flashed hot and cold, the anger cresting and ebbing. Whenever you were upset, you didn’t lash out or cry, preferring to fall silent until the storm passed.

Despite a tiny voice in the back of your mind telling you it would be useless to try, you attempted another shot at winning his validation; hoping Sukuna would bestow it unto you readily and without mockery.

“Then, why don’t you come and shop with me? I’m sure a man of your taste would help my image.”

He stares at you for a long moment, unblinking. You’re reminded of a snake—its tongue scenting the air to determine whether to strike, unlidded eyes locking onto its target.

Sukuna thaws, tapping off the excess ash onto the floor. You try not to cringe at how the poor waiters would have to sweep all of that up once he had left.

“Fine. I’ll help,” he says like it's the biggest feat in his life to perform. “But, on one condition.”

Eager, you nod, not wanting to turn him off or jeopardize a moment with such a handsome man who wouldn’t look twice at you if it weren’t for your last name.

“We push the wedding back by a month.”

Flashback: One week ago

Tensions were running high in the courtroom.

Rows of judges and the impassive jury hollows out in shades of gray, fading into the white buzz of his mind as Sukuna glances at his brother’s ashen face. Outside, the hungry press waits, sharks roaming in deathly waters waiting for the first drop of blood.

Itadori Jin clenches his pen in his white-knuckled grip. Their defense attorney, Hiromi Higuruma leans close to him, whispering something under his breath.

Sukuna can’t hear him from his vantage point on the testimonial seat, but he can venture a guess when his younger twin nods, pushing his glasses up the sweaty bridge of his nose.

“Higuruma-san, please take the floor,” the judge intones, allowing for their docketed defense to play out.

The ruthless, cold lawyer clears his throat, and stands.

He turns to face the jury, those soulless eyes sparking with a passion Sukuna has never seen before in all his twenty eight years of knowing the old lawyer.

“Your honor—Judge Itachi. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. How many of us have often mistaken goodwill for evil? We don’t bite the hand that feeds us and yet, we have every right to question when something isn’t as sanctimonious as it seems.” He turns his dark gaze to the rows of people.

“Itadori Sukuna has devoted half of his life to the bolstering of young athletes. Football is one of his biggest passions and he often pays meticulous attention to the facilities that nurture the talent of our future sportsmen. The sole person to be blamed for the murder of young Masamichi Ryota isn’t the man sitting on that podium—it’s to be found in the coach who pushed him beyond his capabilities and forced him to play even with a ruptured spleen—”

“Objection, your honor.” Nanami Kento, an unctuous piece of shit in a neatly-pressed suit who thrives on taking cases pro-bono to bolster his spotless reputation, stands. He adjusts his tie, looking at the plaintiff’s family—the coach’s great mustache trembling as he holds back his anger.

“The post-mortem report submitted shows that Coach Tanaka has explicitly asked for a leave of rest for the star player. But, the rejection letter—traced from Itadori Sukuna’s hand, I might add—explicitly denied that request on grounds of the millions of yen he has betted on that poor boy’s success.”

The crowd moves, a great sea snake whispering, scales rustling. Unsure of whether to attack or stand down.

“Your Honor, that is a stretch,” Hiromi drones. “The young man was known to have a history of smoking and a regrettable habit of shooting ecstasy. A fact, we found out later on, that was unearthed in the same autopsy reports you had just shared, Nanami-san.”

This time, the two attorneys stare each other down.

Sukuna fights back a smirk at the blonde man’s narrowed eyes. Beside him, Tanaka, the coach, hangs his head.

“While his death is very regrettable and a horror to his family and loved ones, Masamichi was not known for reigning in his… impulses. He has a weak will and a fondness for abusing substances.”

“Objection,” Nanami raised his voice. “Defaming the deceased’s name is a violation of—”

“Order, order,” Judge Itachi bangs his gavel, shaking his jowls as he glares down from the stand. The room quietens. Nanami takes a deep breath while Hiromi glances at his watch.

“Nanami-san, the Defamation Act 2013 does not apply to this situation as Masamichi is not a minor. A lawyer of your caliber should know this.” Nodding towards Higuruma, he says, “Continue.”

This time, Sukuna can’t help the chuckle slipping from his mouth.

Hearing him, Jin shakes his head with a glare, hazel eyes drilling Now’s not the time, asshole deep into his skull.

Higuruma, having heard his slip, also narrows his eyes.

Nanami uses this moment to pounce on Sukuna’s perceived indifference.

“He openly mocks the death of one of Japan’s brightest football stars, and yet, we’re supposed to believe in his goodwill? If you were to speak of my client’s dead prodigy, you should take into account what kind of man Itadori Sukuna truly is.”

Commanding the floor, the sharply-dressed blonde man takes center stage.

“Ladies and gentlemen. Judge and jury. Itadori Sukuna hails from an affluent family, but do not let that distract you from how he uses his position in society to silence those lower than him.” Looking straight into Sukuna’s eye with that infuriating, righteous stare these bootlickers always had, Kento seethes.

“He is a drug-addled playboy who spends his time exploiting young talent for his own gain. These young men under his program are little more than betting fodder for him and his other rich friends. Wouldn’t you say that is correct? How many times have we seen him in the news because of his drunk folly? If he were an actor, we would’ve banned him from screens, and yet, because of his standing in society, we commend him for exploiting our sporting talents—and ultimately, playing in the negligence to cause someone’s death.”

Higuruma bristles, not expecting his opponent to pull out his client’s reputation and smear it across the courtroom floors.

“You claim defamation is uncouth, and yet, you’re doing the same thing to my client, Nanami-san—”

“Order,” Judge Itachi bangs his gavel again, this time looking irritated at how this case had turned.

Sukuna suddenly catches sight of a woman from across the room. She’s glaring at him with unabashed hatred, her dark eyes swollen and red-rimmed, lower lip wobbling. Beside her, the man he assumes is her husband wears a stony mask, his gaze locked on the floor, completely still except for the rapid rising and falling of his erratic breaths.

They were both clad in a dress, shirt and slacks that looked like they belonged to the 90s—neat and clean, but shabby in a way that only these lower class scum could pull off if the dress code given to them was business casual.

These must be Ryota’s good-for-nothing power hungry parents who threw him into the harsh pits of Japanese football in hopes of improving their standing in society. How plain and old they look. Sukuna fights back the urge to sneer at them, keeping his expression neutral.

It’s like Jin’s voice is in his ear: Do not misbehave. Do not give them more reason to already hate you. Remember—Jin’s infuriatingly kind eyes were unflinching and serious. They’ve just lost their son. Have some compassion and remorse.

“Attorneys, return to your seat. The jury has already made their decision and I, for one, can vouch for it.”

Sukuna feels his palms going clammy, and suddenly, the idea of investing in sports from Ino’s advice was making his stomach turn.

I’m going to kill that bastard once I’m out of here.

Removing the slip of paper from the white envelope of justice, Judge Itachi clears his throat.

Higuruma sits back down, his viper-like eyes locked on the judge’s face. Trying to predict the outcome.

“The court today has deemed the case Itadori v Japan’s Football League a negligence in duty of care concerning Masamichi Ryota’s untimely death.”

No one is breathing, all attention on the judge with his pockmarked face.

Sukuna is fixated on Jin, whose head is bowed, eyes closed. If this blew up in their faces, a case like this would cause Itadori Enterprises to suffer a major investor fallout.

And once again, the blame of their family’s bad fortune would be on him.

Sukuna swears the last time he was this nervous, he was waiting for Este’s pregnancy test results to come back negative.

It was one time, ‘Kuna! She had tears in her eyes, the stupid white stick clenched in her hand. Can you lay off of me and take responsibility for once in your goddamn life?

He should call her after this—apologize to her. God knows it would be his last fuck before he has to spend half of his life behind bars for the death of some schmuck kid whose name he had already forgotten.

Judge Itachi speaks again, knocking him out of his reverie.

“Therefore, the jury and I have come to the conclusion. In the case of Itadori Itadori-san, we find him—”

The clock ticks. Every lung is constricted—jury, attorneys, a few press members who had managed to bribe their way in. Sukuna recognizes them with their obnoxious yellow press tags; thinks how many of these leeches would get a raise once they broke the scoop on him.

Oh, the irony, he muses. His downfall being their salvation to fighting back against the rising cost of living.

“��not guilty.”

…

Sukuna is unsure if he’s heard it right.

Not guilty.

He doesn’t react immediately, blinking slowly like a fish caught out of water. The oldest son of Itadori Wasuke tries to meet his twin’s eye, but Jin is as shocked as he was, frozen with his laser-sharp focus trailed on the stand—trying to digest this turn of events.

Higuruma is the one who finally breaks the ice, standing and bowing to Judge Itachi. On cue, the rest of the room follows suit, getting to their feet and showing the retreating judge their begrudging respect.

Sukuna bows jerkily, unused to such a humble gesture he had almost forgotten how to do it.

In front of him, the brat’s mother starts to bawl, her husband’s arms coming to wrap around her as they both shuffle out of the courtroom, looking older and grayer than when they had entered.

Sukuna doesn’t have much time to force a lick of sympathy for them, not when this farce of a trial was over and he was late for Ino’s party.

He hops down the stand, ambling easily to his younger brother who was whispering in low tones with their lawyer. A few feet away, Nanami Kento reassures the coach and his family, painting a picture of trying to achieve righteous justice for that good name—a feat Sukuna knew he would never achieve.

After all, the Itadori empire wasn’t built on rainbows on sunshine but pure, hard grit. And a little bit of blood and here and there to get what they want.

Jin looks up, frowns. “Let’s catch the sedan and have a smoke. You and I have a lot to discuss about.”

The way he said it made Sukuna feel like a kid again, about to be chastised for peeing the bed or killing off the pet goldfish.

Higuruma packed up his briefcase of documents, and a pack of bodyguards stationed around the different points of the courtroom swarmed to the middle, shielding the two brothers and their lawyers the second the doors opened and the press descended on them.

Flashing lights went off in a wave of clicks, the vultures with their cameras snapping his humiliation at every angle for their publications; boldly throwing their questions at him without fear now that the great Itadori “Ryomen” Sukuna was knocked down a peg or two.

Itadori-san, can you comment about Masamichi-san’s death at length?

One woman with a silver bob shoved a mic in his face. The guard on his right quickly elbowed her out of the way, throwing his arm up to hide Sukuna’s visage from the bug-like chittering click of these press leeches and their expensive cameras.

Itadori-san, this news must come as a shock. What does this mean for the future of Itadori Enterprise?

Will this affect any future mergers, particularly a rumor circulating about a potential collaboration with Nara Corp?

Itadori-san, do you ever regret investing in football?

A few sport reporters were also seen trying to push their way through the crowd, recorders in hand to glean some golden nuggets for their pathetic column.

Itadori-san, what does your verdict mean for the future of the Japan Football League?

Itadori-san, did you know that Masamichi-san was about to prepare for his university entrance exams? How does his death make you feel?

“No comment,” Higuruma intones, taking Jin and Sukuna both by the elbow to steer them towards their waiting car like they were teenagers again; back when he had to bring the twins straight into Wasuke’s study to discuss their future inheritance.

A fresh-faced rookie Sukuna had never seen before stumbles in front of their entourage, and he’s mortified to see a pink lipstick print on the front of the intern’s tag.

Royale News' first appearance in such a serious case.

“Itadori-san, you’re already approaching the ripe age of thirty," the dim-wit says. “Do you have your eye on a woman who can domesticate you? Can you ever be tamed?”

Amidst the overlapping voices and chaos, that question sticks to Sukuna like sweat on skin during an unbearable summer heat, unsettling him until he sinks into the sedan with Jin beside him and Higuruma on the opposite seat.

The door closes shut, bodyguards standing in front of the heavily tinted side windows to keep the press from clamoring after them.

Once the chaos was left behind on the freeway in a cloud of smoke and ashes, did Jin lean forward to raise the privacy screen. With the driver unable to hear them, his younger twin reaches for his packet of Montecristos, lighting three of them up and passing one to each man.

Higuruma accepts his offer with a nod, while Sukuna grabs the nicotine-laced vice from him with a ferocity that takes his brother aback. He inhales deeply, exhaling rings of smoke which fogs up the car, tasting cherries, cedarwood, tobacco and his freedom.

“Easy, ‘Kuna,” Jin mumbles tersely. Sukuna resists the urge to flip him off.

Instead, he drags his gaze to the lawyer smoking quietly in front of him, smiling sleazily in triumph. “You did a good job, Higuruma. If I were you, I’d ask for a raise.”

The Itadori scion expects his brother to join in the jest meekly, like he always does. Not glare at him with pure vitriol in his eyes, the kind Sukuna had never seen Jin harbor for him.

“You scumbag,” Jin mutters hotly. His brother half expects him to throw a curse word or two with how riled up he was. “You were supposed to dump this stupid hobby. I gave you the money to start a foundation for good press. Not throw it all into some useless human betting ring. Are you an imbecile?”

That was a new insult. Jin rarely ever threw him a good verbal uppercut, and Sukuna must’ve really fucked up to earn this side of his younger twin brother.

He plasters on a sleazy smile, giving his otouto a once over.

“Well, aren’t you a fucking ray of sunshine? You should be glad Higuruma managed to avert the crisis and get me out of it. Or, are you going to piss in these blessings?”

“I would rather you didn’t embroil yourself in such a shit show in the first place.”

Jin sighs, sags into the seat and massages his temple. “One day, Sukuna, you’re going to give me a heart attack and you’ll have to take over oto-san’s company. Then, you will know true responsibility. True suffering.”

Sukuna hums, staring outside at the scenery flying by.

“Neither the company nor its investors would last a day with me at the helm. So, for your sake and mine, I’m going to ask the doctor to keep the life support machine going even if you’re hanging onto your last breath, dear brother.”

“Good luck with that,” Jin refutes with a slight snarl. “I would explicitly mention it in my will to refute your efforts at reviving me.”

“Then, I will rebuke your will.”

“You can’t because I actually have a son to execute it.”

“Yuuji is two. He can’t even hold a pencil.”

Any insult towards his beloved son would never be tolerated by the famed Itadori family man. Jin puffs out his chest, about to berate his older brother, when Higuruma stops them both with a sigh.

“If only your parents could see the both of you now. How disappointed they would be in you, Sukuna.”

Hiromi sucks in a deep breath of the sweet cigar, turning his head and exhaling lightly out of politeness for smoking in his employer’s car.

Despite his hulking muscles and blase attitude, Sukuna can’t help but glower in petulance at any mention of Wasuke and Kasumi’s disappointment in him. Growing up as the black sheep has casted a permanent cloud over him—his best efforts were seen as second tier in comparison with his perfect, golden brother. And Sukuna resents any mention of it.

Their family lawyer continues on, as if he hadn’t made two of them heel to an uneasy stop.

“At your age, you should be taking over Jin’s part. But, your brother is too nice. He took up the burden so you could do what, exactly? Party every night? Sleep with models? Get involved in scandals?”

Hiromi sighs, and Sukuna turns his glare outside the window, unwilling to take such a personal beat down.

“Your mother had hoped you would snap out of your selfish streak. She even thought you would settle down and give her some grandchildren by the time you turned twenty five. But, you had to be pictured… fucking… the mayor’s daughter during a gala. How crude.”

“Stop talking down to me like you’re even at my level, Higuruma.” Sukuna snaps and something in his tone catches the other two men off guard. “You think just because we employ you in our good graces, you have the fucking right—”

“What Hiromi is trying to say is this,” Jin interjects before this could escalate into a full fist fight. “Both of us have come up with the best way for our family to get past this scandal.”

Sukuna has heard this a thousand times before. The Itadori pockets were bottomless when it came to preserving their good name.

“How?” He sneers, dismissive and mildly insulted that the two of them had made a decision for him without his input. “Don’t tell me you’re going to flush out more money to keep the press quiet. We can’t keep using the same strategy over and over again.”

In answer, Hiromi and Jin share a look. Sukuna suddenly feels like the car seat he’s on is about to be pulled from under him.

Wilted ash drips from the tip of his neglected cigar. He tenses, darts his vermillion eyes between his two conspirators and wardens.

“Hiromi and I have come up with a better idea,” Jin begins his pitches like he always does—with a little smile and a sniffle. “The idea is—”

“Marriage,” Hiromi intones, taking one brother aback and the other on a guilt trip.

Jin grimaces. Sukuna stumbles with the words stuttering out like a reckless oil spill.

So, the only thing he could spout was, “M-marriage?! What kind of trickery is this? Jin—” He looks to his otouto, hoping against hope his ears are just fucked up and he didn’t actually hear Hiromi saying the tragic, forbidden ‘M’ word.

“—this has to be a mistake.”

“No, it’s not,” Hiromi steps in to cover Jin’s ass, placing himself at the front to take the bullets of rage that would no doubt rain down on him once the whole plan was laid bare to the older, hot-headed twin.

“We believe that with your souring reputation and increasing questions surrounding your perpetual bachelorhood, settling down with someone would be in the interest of the family business. And of course, your inheritance.”

Hiromi makes sure to dangle the most effective carrot in front of him; that sadistic bastard.

Sukuna seethes—confusion, anger, disappointment and fear coalescing to overtake his first instinct to run. Numbing him with his inaction of thoughts and body.

Hiromi lifts his heavy-bagged eyes, pinning him right to the spot. The knife slices deeper, cutting him from the inside out; hammering in this decision he absolutely had no say in unless he would want to kiss his lavish lifestyle goodbye.

“We need to get you married off by the end of the year.” A death sentence knells right into his chest; Hiromi digs the pain deeper.

“In fact, the sooner, the better.”

Sukuna remembers the very first time he had seen you in your wedding dress.

It was a chance encounter as he passed by a Morinaga boutique in downtown Shibuya; his brother having orchestrated the entire meeting so Sukuna would catch a glance of his future bride trying on her custom-made dress.

With her head bowed, and shoulders bare under the light, the older Itadori twin thought her figure was appeasing and pleasing to the eyes. That is, until she turned around with her naked face and he had to physically stop himself from recoiling.

“Is that her?” he demands, unwilling to believe Jin would sell him out like this. Shades of disgust lines his tone, and he tries not to put his stupid twin in a headlock and break his neck.

Jin notices his reluctance and makes a face. “She’s unlike the girls you whore yourself out to, that’s for sure.”

The more he looks at you, the more Sukuna is starting to think this was a mistake.

“She’s so… boring. Vanilla. Are you sure this is what you think is best for me?”

Since their father passed on and the business went to his younger twin, Sukuna was often painted in their society and by the media as the irresponsible Itadori—the audacious older brother, the partier.

The playboy.

Often having a gaggle of girls at his mercy, he was not exempted from warming beautiful model’s beds, and having flings with other trust fund babes—bad habits his younger brother was desperately trying to get him to shrug off to take on more of the family business mantle.

“You’re almost thirty, ‘Kuna. It’s time to act like it.”

Jin sighs, removes his glasses. The action reminds him so much of their father that Sukuna pauses for a second, blinking away the mirage of that senile, old man.

Sukuna hadn’t noticed just how old his younger brother had gotten.

Dressed in a sleek trench coat costing four times more than a McDonald workers’ monthly salary, Itadori Jin was quiet and unassuming, yet only his twin brother knew that still waters ran the deepest.

An inch shorter than him and with a kid from his old, dead wife, Itadori Jin was the antithesis of Sukuna’s recklessness. Where the older twin was all hulking machismo and a massive ego, his brother was soft-spoken and with a sharp mind that was always one step ahead of his, bringing their father’s company back from the brink of bankruptcy and launching it into international waters from his sheer will.

Sukuna respects the guy, and as much as he wants to rile Jin up and pop a vein on his younger brother’s temple, he tempers down his sarcasm, preferring to roll his eyes.

“Whatever. So, her daddy wants the merger money and you want me to settle down with some ugly chick?”

Jin winces, wishing his brother wasn’t being this curt and lewd.

“Her father wants an heir. And he wants 40% of our shares. That’s a whole different game.”

“He can’t have those.” Sukuna was irresponsible as they came, but even he understood the basic math of divesting half of your company’s assets to a party other than your stipulated stakeholders. “The Nara family already holds 22% of our board and the Ikina’s are up close with 15%. If those vultures take 40, how’re we gonna break even in the next quarter? We’ll be bleeding red if we give into their whims.”

In answer, the corners of his brother’s mouth twitches. “I see you’ve been doing your homework. Impressive.”

They both have stopped in their tracks, standing a little ways on the sidewalk where prying ears couldn’t hear their discussion.

Jin suddenly turns serious. “L/N-san has struck gold with new fintech models. We need to curry his favor if he wants to reduce the patent price for us to move on with Project Armstrong. I hope you understand the gravity of this situation.”

Usually, Sukuna prefers not talking business with his brother in such broad daylight without a drink in hand. But, seeing as how Jin has left him no choice, he relents to this impromptu exchange, feeling more and more like some wild stock being sold in a farm the longer he speaks to his brother.

“And she’s nicknamed the Wisteria Woman because her entire family latches onto fame and power like leeches,” he bristles, catching Jin by surprise.

See? Even a useless ass like him could bother with basic research. And the rumors were nastier than he imagined.

“I already don’t like the sound of that—of her.”

The younger Itadori cocks his head. “Then, I think you should be honest with her if that is how you feel. That this is a business arrangement and nothing else.”

Sukuna flicks a cigarette from his leather coat’s pocket, sticking it between his teeth.

“Say I agree to this plan. What’s in it for me?”

Without a beat of hesitation, Jin replies:

“110% of the profit.”

Sukuna nearly spits out his stick.

The amount yawns before him, looming zeros and zeros staring him in the face.

“What? Cat got your tongue?” Jin teases, though there’s tension crinkling in the corner of his eyes.

Switching gears, Sukuna turns mellow; even slaps on a smile. “I see. Interesting.”

“So. Are you on board with this?”

In the distance, he sees your silhouette exiting the bridal shop, bags in hand with your maids or girlfriends following behind. The sunlight does little to bring any depth to your expression or features, but he appreciates that you look semi-decent from his vantage point.

“Fine,” he says, clicking open his vintage Dupont to light the tip of his cigarette. “Count me in.”

He supposes that even with such an embarrassing family background that will drag the Itadori name through the mud, the high stakes more than made up for such a lackluster wife.

His favorite whore sighs right into his shoulder, the smell of his cum, sweat and her expensive perfume strong on her skin.

After ejaculating right onto her tits and smearing it everywhere down her belly, Sukuna was exhausted and in a need for something stronger than nicotine. Rolling over, he picks up a joint Ino had passed to him as congratulations for making it out of that nasty as fuck trial, lighting it up and inhaling with a tremendous sigh.

Este’s lips are right on his shoulder, kissing a path from his deltoid to collarbone. Sukuna wraps a hand in her soft, brown hair, holding her firmly in place as he makes a move like he was about to kiss her; her lips parting and smoke pouring into her waiting mouth, her hitched inhale pulling a cruel smile across his own lips.

She turns her face away, eyes watering and fighting back a coughing fit. “Asshole.”

“An invitation for anal? Gladly, baby.” He turns her onto her belly, peals of laughter muffled by the pillow, strong arms holding her down as he positions her on her hands and knees, joint stuck in between his teeth.

Este turns her face to the side, catching his eye. Mascara smudges around her eyes, her red lipstick feathering at the corners of her impishly smiling mouth.

“What’re you doing, ‘Kuna?”

“Y’know what I’m doing,” he murmurs, cock stirring at her wiggling hips and devilish grin.

“Are you really going to take my ass?”

He sucks in another inhale of the joint, feeling the high slowly unlocking his muscles and turning his brain fuzzy. “Scared? Afraid daddy might find out his daughter is going around offering her virgin hole to any rich man who’s on the marriage market?”

Condescension drips in poisonous tendrils, and she bristles. “Fuck you, ‘Kuna.”

In one swift motion, he’s sheathed inside of her, feeling her walls choke down on his cock. His head tosses back, sweat glistening off the tribal tattoos on his chest, hips drawing back and snapping forward in languid thrusts.

The moon shines strong. Cheap Southern alcohol pumps in his blood, his sweat soaks through her skin and hair, damp skin illuminated by the ember tip of his joint.

“Isn’t that what I’m already doing to you?” He drawls, and her body starts to shake.

“We still—mhm—h-haven’t talked about your m-marriage…”

Her voice fades; cracks on the reality of him no longer sharing a bed with her.

Jesus. Does everyone know about this?

Sukuna doesn’t do anything to comfort her, except for slipping a hand between her legs to rub soft circles on her clit as a flimsy apology.

She keens, white-knuckled grip fisting the soft blankets. Her mediterranean mix shows under the weak light, tan skin stretching over defined back muscles, dark roots growing past the brown dye job she gets done once every two weeks.

In another life, Sukuna thinks he could’ve been in love with her.

Este screams his name as she shatters around him. Sukuna tosses the half-smoked joint back on the side table, not caring if it would catch on something and burn her room down. He’d just fuck her through the flames until she asphyxiates and succumbs to both the lack of oxygen and her orgasm.

She clings onto him, a second layer of skin he wants nothing to do with.

Sukuna pushes her away not so gently, grabbing his joint and snuffing it out with the heel of his palm.

“I gotta go,” he mumbles, reaching for his shirt, pants. She watches as he dresses, still dazed and starry-eyed from her release.

“Are you going back to her? To Y/N?”

Sukuna crinkles his nose, as if the mention of your name was enough to make him lose his appetite. “Don’t be stupid. No. I’m going back to my place for a shower and a nightcap. I’ll see you around.”

Tossing her a nonchalant wave, Sukuna leaves Este’s sheets, knowing that in a few more days, he would be back here again.

That’s the thing he likes about Este Nara—she’s easy. Not just to get in bed, but to get away from. She doesn’t bitch or moan about him being distant and aloof. She takes his cruelty without much flinching, seeing the dangerous man lurking under his tattoos and barely thinking anything of it.

If she even had half a brain to think.

He revs the engine of his Ducati Superleggera, hightails it past her condominium with his helmet buckled haphazardly around his neck; not slowing down, wishing he could leave his problems in the dust being kicked up by his tires.

“What do you mean he’s trying to push the marriage to a month later?” your mother seethes over her coffee, glaring at you.

You shrink from her anger, pushing around a soggy banana with your fork tines. “It’s what he told me,” you argue back weakly. “What was I going to say?”

“What about actually standing up for yourself and doing what is best for our agreement?”

She arches a perfectly groomed brow, waiting for you to respond. You cast a despairing look to your father who picks up his glass of bourbon, sipping on it while he listlessly scrolls through his iPad.

“Listen to your mother, my little light.”

“I did,” you tried again, willing them both to understand. Bunching your fists over your lap, you take a deep breath, hoping they would listen. “I did everything you asked me to: not interrupt him. Let him talk. Laugh at his jokes. Everything,” you emphasize. “And yet he asked me to consider pushing the marriage back by a few weeks. What else could I say?”

You reiterate your question, growing hotter in the cheeks. Finally understanding why some people could have a heart attack in the middle of dinner when the entire situation was spun around to paint you as a villain when you had tried your best to be as cooperative as you could.

A grimace stretches across her plastic-filled cheeks. People often said your mother could win a beauty pageant on her worst days; rising above other beautiful women with her wit, charm and charisma. Of course, she was also the daughter of a department store king, so the money graciously ‘donated’ to these glittery showcases put her many steps forward compared to other contestants.

“I don’t know where I went wrong in raising you,” she sighs, dramatic as always. “Jiro, please. Can you speak to Itadori Jin-san and tell him what our daughter told us? There is no way his brother can resist this offer.”

Offer. Like you were a cow to be traded in the market.

“Lia, I told you, Itadori Jin-san has no control over Itadori-san. That’s his nii-san. It would be a perversion of authority if he forces Sukana-san’s hand in any way.”

Her expression sours. “Well, isn’t there some way we can orchestrate a reunion, perhaps? A dinner or getaway to officially welcome them to the family?”

You blanch at the idea of seeing Sukuna again, stewing in your mortification and humiliation when he had already made it clear how distasteful he finds you.

You’re about to say you don’t mind going with Sukuna’s timeline when he sets his glass down with a pensive look on his face.

Ten years older than your mother and with a brilliant mind born from the best business school in Tokyo, your father was not a man to be played with; his word was law, and that was how he spearheaded the tech scene at the tender age of twenty-five with nothing but a dream and his gritty determination.

Knowing he had to prove himself to your grandfather—your mother’s father, on his capabilities to build a home and a better life for a woman who already had everything—made you wonder how he did it.

From nobody to somebody. It’s why no matter how he treated you, he would always have your respect.

“A getaway?” Jiro murmurs, an idea darkening his thoughts. “That could be interesting. Very interesting indeed. I’ll make some plans and we’ll play it by ear.”

He went back to scrolling, ignoring his smugly beaming wife.

Pacified that she had gotten what she wanted, your mother turns nurturing once more, cooing and touching your shoulder.

“We should get you a spa treatment and a light makeover before Itadori-san sees you. Do you have something to wear in mind?”

As if you were a doll whose only purpose was to be dressed up, this was the reality you were living in for the past twenty-seven years of your life. If Itadori-san didn’t want to marry you fast enough and get you out of your childhood home, you were sure a swift bullet to the head would be the best alternative.

Plastering on a smile, you ponder for a second on your choice.

“I want to try something new,” you decide. A furrow appears in her brow.

“What do you mean by new, my dear?”

“Something Itadori-san would like,” you try to curry her approval, feeling lighter and happier when her solemn face breaks into a knowing smile.

“He says he loves dresses with satin and plunging necklines. Thinner heels. I think Okuta-san would understand.”

Referring to your personal stylist, your mother nods her approval.

“That’s perfect. I’ll get her to do some digging on some of Itadori-san’s past girlfriends and see what they wore.”

Unruffled by how audacious that statement was, you were truly reminded that this marriage was a cruelty of convenience when her smile deepens.

“I’m proud of you for taking this step, my dear,” your mother’s voice warms, though the implications of them make you freeze.

“You’re finally proving your worth to the L/N family.”

a.n. OKAY WE'RE SO BACK. ive deleted the first chapter due to low interaction and decided to give this series a second chance by starting with y/n's pov !! this series will rely heavily on feedback and reblogs (my adhd ass cant work on something if i and other people dont care for it) or else it'll be scraped and we keep things moving (i sincerely hope u loved this <3)

#🦢 writes #sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #sukuna x y/n #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #sukuna angst #sukuna smut #series: hopelessly devoted

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penvisions · 8 days ago

Text

stages of devotion {pink and purple}

Pairing: Younger! Joel Miller x Baker! Reader

Summary: Valentine's Day genuinely drives you insane, but you thrive on it until the energy that surrounds other holidays. And this year? This year you have Joel Miller in your life.

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: canon typical language, angst, strained family dynamic, feelings of inadequacy, miscommunication, single dad joel, triggers associated with the food industry, illusions to smut, let me know if i missed any but this is pretty tame

A/N: oops, this is insanely late. but it's done and it helped me through day three of organizing my personal life from my bed, where i'm kind of stuck right now. love y'all!

ao3 link || series masterlist || navigation || ko-fi

Most holidays are made up, or at least so far removed from their historical roots in order to commercialize them for the masses- the jaded thought crossed your mind as you hit submit on a massive order from your main vendor. The espresso sours in your mug, the milk separated from sitting for too long pulls your face into a disgusted frown as you look down into it. It was hours ago now that you made it, your stomach and head telling you it needs caffeine and sustenance; and quick if your headache was any indication.

Holidays were fun and kitschy, brought in a lot of money for the bakery, for your bank account and bills but it was so damn taxing. Three weeks out from the giant pink fluff ball that is Valentine’s Day and the crushing weight of the day sits heavy on your shoulders. But you smile despite it as you shut down the computer set up in the small office, grab your cardigan from

Joel did his best to change your mind on that front with his proposal to find more time for each other in your hectic lives. And it’s been working out pretty well so far. The last two months has been a blur of frantic kisses and coffee runs for the crew here at the shop, of last-minute dates spent eating take out in his truck after his shift ends and before your early bed time.

Another date is tonight, but this time you both share a meal sitting at an actual table and wine poured into large, stemmed glasses. It helps to keep you upbeat for another two weeks, the prep for the holiday pulling you in one direction and a contracted job on the outskirts of the city pulling Joel in another. The memory of the night flits through your mind, your body feeling light and a little warm as you recall the way he hadn’t been able to wait until you up the stairs that leads to further into your apartment…

What you wouldn’t give to see that side of him a little more, the desperate, needy man that is hidden beneath the hardworking, loving, devoted one he is all of the time…

But this week, there’s absolutely no time for anything other than frosting, sprinkles, and batter. Because on Friday, it’s Valentine’s Day. You’ve got a stack of cake orders that equal to one hundred, cupcakes, chocolate strawberries, cookies, fruit tarts, and everything in between. Thankfully you live in the space above the shop, otherwise there would be no way for you and Callie to get it all done. The air in your lungs was more powdered sugar and flour at this point than plain old oxygen, but it’s a small price to pay for the record sales you make every year.

This year, you have a goal in mind for the extra income. The hourly you would normally earn from the week of prep and the day itself- it’s going to go toward helping Joel get Sarah into the summer soccer camp she has her eye on. It’s upstate, the first time she will be away from her father for so long. But the way she went on and on about it at a family dinner with just the three of you, one shared look with the man across the table and you knew you had to help anyway you could to make it happen.

The phone rings just as you place a piping bag down, metal tip on a strategically placed parchment paper to avoid making an even bigger mess atop the cluttered counter. Wiping your hands on the damp towel hanging from the tie of your apron, you reach for it.

“Sugar ‘n Spice, how may I help you?”

“Well, hey there, sweetheart. Been tryin’ to reach you.” The familiar, deep voice of one Joel Miller filters over the line.

“Joel! Oh no, my phone probably died, it’s in the office somewhere underneath the order printouts. I’m so sorry.” Blowing out a wobbly sigh, you realize you can’t see it from where you’re at the counter and lean over to glimpse inside the door.

“No need to apologize, I understand how hectic it is over there. Sarah said it was a lot going on.” You can sense his mood over the phone, tired and a little stressed. You can picture him clenching and unclenching the hand not holding the phone, or rubbing at the back of his neck and digging his fingers into the hair that’s beginning to curl there.

“Yeah, it’s been pretty crazy. Just trying to build the cakes I can and get them in the freezer with a crumb coat. Gonna decorate once they’re all sorted out.” You ramble to try and counteract it, but you know that you’re more than likely just coming off as manic as your voice fills the space of the bakery kitchen over the music you play at a low volume. Callie is out handling the front counter, training the morning person on the specials and how to answer flavor profile questions for everything.

“Listen, sweetheart, I hate to do this to you…” Your heart sinks, voice trailing off as your chest coils tight- Joel’s energy transferring to you over the line.

“Sarah came down with somethin’, had to leave the job site to get her from school. She’s holed up in her room and won’t be able to make it in for her shift later. I’m so sorry, baby.”

“I hope she’s okay, does she need anything? I can make soup or bring over some stuff from here to help cheer her up?” You’re spiraling, you know you are. And Joel’s next words feel like a stab to the gut.

“No, no, that’s okay, sweetheart. I’ve got it all covered over here, we’ll get this to break. You don’t need to worry about us,” Your hearing tunnels out, his deep gravely voice distant as you respond to him with deflated words you would not be able to repeat since they don’t really even register past the line clicking off and the dial tone that mimics a flatline on a heart monitor.

It might as well be, because you’re sure your heart just broke at the implication that you didn’t need to worry about the two most important people in your life. Titles and circumstances don’t change that Joel is a single parent, that he takes his responsibility so seriously because Sarah is his lifeline and always will be. Your own father barely acknowledged you growing up, and now that you’re in the food industry he continues in his steadfast ignorance of your existence. Your brother taking the spotlight, the favorite alongside your younger sister who they dote on endlessly. In that moment, you feel like an outsider and an overlooked daughter all in one. And you don’t like it, so you bury your hurt feelings in the frosting bag you refill and continue piping the countless cakes on the speed racks surrounding you well into the night.

A week goes by with no Joel. Sarah out for her three shifts she works after school on the days she doesn’t have soccer practice. You’re trying to unload the pallet that the driver was insistent on leaving in the dining room of the bakery, a new person who you’ve never seen before. Normally, Rick is the one who has the route with your shop on it and he always stays for a cup of coffee and a sweet roll after unloading the delivery directly into the walk in and kitchen for you. You miss him, feeling the weird energy wafting off the new guy and the loss of your almost friend as you want for personal interaction after being alone and holing up in the kitchen- you haven’t been sleeping, and you feel more than a little pathetic. Still.

The phone turned to silent as you throw yourself into the holiday prep, pink and white and red swirling even behind closed eyelids. Just as your cheeks puff with a deep breath and the thud of the last bag of flour onto the stack you keep organized by date, moving the ones just delivered to the bottom, the bell chimes in front of the bakery.

The pressure of the holiday is firmly on your shoulders, people picking up their orders begins in an hour, leaving you very little time to be frustrated with the actions of the new delivery guy. Frosting needs to be made for the last rack of cakes, royal icing for the cookies that people can come in and request names on, chocolate drizzle for the strawberries that are already coated in their shells, but all of it will fly off the shelves, off the racks and through the city until the very second you lock the door promptly at six pm, maybe even a little bit later if people are queued up or last minute pop ins.

Joel hovers in the doorway to the kitchen space, his form filling the empty frame well. He’s got an almost shy expression about him and an armful of flowers while a small bag hangs from around two thick fingers.

“I locked the door, I know you ain’t really open yet.” Is how he announces himself after a moment of watching you move the wooden pallet to lean against an empty wall by the door that leads up to your personal space. You jump and spin around with a hand to your heart, the footsteps thought to be of the man he’s berates with his next words. “Delivery guy left it wide open, didn’t recognize him but he was pretty rude when I said I knew you.”

“Joel!” You place your other hand to the counter in front of you and lean over to gather your breath back, aware of him placing the items in his hands down atop it before they settle on your back in a comforting, familiar gesture.

“Didn’t mean to startle you, I’m so sorry, sweetheart.” His voice rumbles over you, so close. Closer than he’s been in the past week, just missed calls and texts checking in with you- knowing you were beyond busy with the shop. “We got your delivery, Sarah is feeling a bit better and scarfed it down quick.”

“Oh, um, good.” You shrug off his hands and stand to your full height, eyes bouncing around- never landing on him.

“Did…did I do somethin’?” He’s straight to the point, knowing that there’s no need to mince words, not when it was you- not when it was him and you together. Clear communication, clear intentions. Or so he thought.

“No, I just- you know what, yeah, you did something,” The bite in your words is sharp, digging into a confused and exhausted Joel. “You cut me out! ‘I’ve got it all covered’. Well, newsflash, Joel, I got it all covered myself. I’ve got an insane day ahead of me, so please, just-just go.”

He says your name, tone pleading as he reaches out for you, but you take a step back, eyes finally landing on him.

“I get it, it’s just you two against the world. I really do, you’re a great father, a good man- of course you are. But you need to please, just…” You trail off as you see the emotions swirl in his amber eyes- the dark brown catching the fluorescents of the kitchen since the sun is still dipped below the horizon.

Joel’s mouth opens, but the store phone rings once and then the answering machine clicks. Your father’s voice fills the tense air, adding another layer of anxiety and weight on top of your already aching shoulders.

Your mother and brother will be by in an hour to pick up some stuff, make sure to set aside some of the better lookin’ things, yeah? Don’t put anythin’ too absurd in the box, you know I don’t like that type of shit. Just plain and simple. You always do too much, stress yourself out for no goddamn reason.

That’s it, that’s the entire message. No greeting, no sign off, no mention of the holiday or your name or that he’s grateful for the free products. Just a command and a chastisement. Because charging your family once, that was enough of a humiliation to experience. The laugher and scoffing, the words ‘outrageous’ and ‘not worth that much’ echo in your head each and every time you input a new price into the computer system or handwrite a card for the display case.

“Go, please.” Your voice is small, but strong. The comparison of the man whose voice just spoke and Joel standing in your kitchen too much to handle right now.

“Okay, sweetheart, I’ll go,” He motions to the bouquet of flowers and the bag still on the counter closest to him. “Those- those are for you, for Valentine’s Day, cause I thought…cause you’re my girl.”

He doesn’t sound so sure, his words rising at the end of his sentence as if questioning it in that very moment, despite the time he put forth in choosing the items. His eyes are questioning too, as he connects them with yours. But all you can offer him is a trembling bottom lip and a tight nod of your head.

He doesn’t ask you to call him and you don’t say that you will.

You’re surrounded by pink even as your heart darkens purple, as if bruised by every strained interaction with your family, aching and lighting up in the way of this…rut with the man that turns around and disappears through the space you’ve created for yourself.

The door is opening before you even raise your hand to knock.

Joel stands there with a kitchen towel slung over his shoulder, the smell of cooking food wafting through the open door. He looks so goddamn hopeful as his eyes rove over your form, straight from the bakery where you had finally locked the door behind the last patrons. Frosting and sprinkles splotch your apron, oil darkening spots on your jeans and shines on your hands as you hold the necklace unearthed from pretty tissue paper and a simple jewelry box.

It’s gold. With the imprint of a tent right in the middle of the flat pendant.

“Joel…”

He’s ushering you inside just as the tears begin to trail down your cheeks, warmth moving up your neck from your chest to burn hot behind blurry eyes.

“It wasn’t supposed to make you cry, it was- it was supposed to make you smile.” He whispers as if berating himself for messing up the one day he promised himself he would make a good one.

“Their hap-happy tears,” Your voice warbles out, hands reaching for him as he turns around from closing the door, wrapping around his neck. You burrow your head into his chest and breathe him, his own coming around you to hug you tight to him. The gold of the necklace is cold where it swings across his neck and dips below the back collar of his shirt.

“Sarah’s mom left the day before the holiday, years ago,” The confession, the reason- it’s muffled where he buries his own face in your hair, smelling the sweetness of powdered sugar and vanilla. A perfume that lingers on your skin from the shop, even on your days off, a part of what makes him so enamored by you. The undertones of amaretto, of cherry- it’s his favorite scent in the world ever since your encounter months ago- a tent and a night of passioned shared between you two. The beginning of the connection you two share, despite everything.

“She always gets a little…melancholic I guess is the right word, this time of year. And with her getting’ her, uh, monthly right before we met- it’s been a tough couple of months for her to see all ‘o her friends turn to their moms for help with stuff she’s goin’ through.”

“I-I didn’t know,” You feel selfish, for feeling the way you do. None of it comparing to the way a child feels the loss of such an important figure in their life, a literal parent- you know all to well how much it can affect someone. Your own mother staying in the car this morning while your brother rolled into the shop like he was the reason it was standing, demanding the things he ‘had to make an insane drive for at the ass crack of dawn’ without so much as a smile or a thank you. Gone in the blink of an eye, your mother not even bothering to look into the bay windows from where she primly looked over whatever was in her lap.

“Not your responsibility to know, it’s…unless...unless you want it to be?” Joel sounds nervous, unsure of himself- such a stark contrast to how he normally speaks. He’s leaning back, large hands moving to your neck as you look up at him, his fingers gently prodding at the sensitive underside of your chin. His eyes are so deep as they scan over your face. A smudge of frosting dried high on your cheek as you feeling a little more than self-conscious.

“Wh-what do you mean?” The words are a whisper. Mind working overtime as you strip his own down to figure out what exactly it is he’s saying.

“If you were…my girl, my girlfriend…we could- we could manage it together. She adores you, asks after you when you ain’t been around for a few days or she’s not workin’ alongside you. She…she wants you in her life mor’n I’ve seen with anyone. But I’m terrified of makin’ more mistakes. Especially with her.”

Your brow furrows, lips thinning into a straight line.

“Mistake?”

“I’m not callin’ this-“ He dips down to kiss you chastely, to calm himself as much as you. “You ain’t a mistake, you’re…you’re everythin’ I’ve never let myself want, she’s been the priority. But I want to be selfish, want you in my life, sweetheart. Permanently.”

“I’ve never had a boyfriend,” You confess, memories of half formed relationships bubble up, feelings of being the one that people turn to or ask after when others say no. Of situations that fizzle out in the blink of an eye and never on your account. “No one’s ever asked that of me before.”

“I’m not asking it of you, I’m offerin’ it to you. Lemme be your first, please. I-I’ll do right by you, better than this past week has been, I promise.”

Your heart soars, the weight you carry in it lightening at the earnest way he speaks. And then you’re closing the gap to press your lips firmly to his.

More happy tears warming your cheeks- you’re kissing your first ever boyfriend.

His lips are velvet soft against you, tongue hot where it slips between your own to ignite sparks all over your skin. You moan into his mouth, swallowing the heady sound he makes in response. You’re about to pull him closer when a timer dings and you nearly jump out of your skin.

He parts with a chuckle, hands trailing slowly as he distances himself from you and moves toward the oven. The towel still over one broad shoulder acts as a barrier for his hands as he folds it just so to take a deep pan out of the oven once the timer is silenced. The smell of garlic and herbs fills the space with a fuller sense, and you realize that he’s made lasagna. An offhand comment made a few weeks ago lamenting the lack of a truly good finding in the city.

“Sarah and I put it together, we were kinda hoping you’d be by tonight after the shop closes. But she’s off at a sleepover now, guess she sensed things were a little…strained.”

He doesn’t let you help, instead you’re gently ushered into a chair at the dining table with a glass of wine while he carefully plates up two portions alongside some roasted brussel sprouts and garlic bread. When he finally sits down beside you, he takes one of your hands in his and kisses the top of it, a bashful smile playing at the corner of his lips. His eyes flash to the pendant hanging around your neck, carefully clasped by his own hands before he set to bustling around the kitchen.

“I don’t cook much, so it might be shit honestly, but Sarah got the recipe from one of her friend’s moms. Say’s she was born in Italy and it’s the real deal. Family recipe and all that.”

It’s amazing, but even if it was merely an okay rendition, the fact that he put so much effort into it would’ve made it so. You tell him just as much as you stand from your spot after the last bite and settle over his lap with a confidence that buzzes underneath your skin. Steadying hands grip your hips as you press into him and make out like a couple of teenagers right there in the kitchen, but when you rock once, twice, three times against the hardness you feel beneath the denim of his jeans the world suddenly shifts as he picks you up like you weigh nothing.

His drawling voice dips dirty promises are peppered into your skin with sucking kisses, your excited giggles and whining moans echo through the house as he carries you up the stairs and into his room.

He makes good on every single promise pressed into your skin, until you’re both gasping and panting, bodies spent and limbs exhausted.

Wrapped up in his arms, legs tangled beneath the sheets- warm, safe, and loved for exactly who you are and nothing more or nothing less. You smile as you hear the soft snores as Joel drifts off and shift just a little more securely into the plush bed, because you feel like you could float away. Happiness warms you just as his body does around you and you bite into your bottom lip to keep a giddy giggle contained.

Joel Miller is your boyfriend.

Words that slipped past a gasping breath while he was deep inside you moments before flare brightly, as if branded into the skin of your chest, curved around your heart.

You’re mine, you hear me? Mine.

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