#dental issues tw

[brooklynislandgirl]

Oversharing- Why We Can’t Have Nice Thinks- Rabbit/Christmas Edition.

So last Saturday, Rabbit has a tooth ache. He blows through half my bottle of Tylenol but when I say “Dentist...?” He refuses me. Says he’s fine. All week, it’s soft foods and lots of pain meds, up-to and including my very last hoarded single Oxycodone, which did nothing for him. All week I keep asking to make him an appointment, he refuses. Yesterday:  Me: How ya doin’ babe...oh Jesus. Rabbit: Well, doesn’t hurt any more.  Me: Looks like you’re smuggling a golf ball in your jaw, but okay. This morning:  Rabbit: Can you call in to work today, gonna need a ride to the dentist, I feel woozy. Stoat: Yeah, sure. Let me get my phone. Me, stumbling out of bed at oh-my-god-its-barely-six-am: Hmm? What? Rabbit: Gonna need you to call the dentist. Rabbit: ~face now looks like he’s got a softball lodged in his teeth~ Moral of the story: Always listen to your wife, and let her make you an appointment before you have to scramble to find an emergency walk-in appointment. Moral of the story II: Listen to your instincts and not your grumpy macho spouse.

[thethingything]

me: y'know I don't think our withdrawal symptoms are actually that bad this time...

also me: why do I keep feeling so shaky and like I've got the flu or something? I feel so ill but it doesn't feel like my usual symptom flares. what the fuck is with all these random muscle pains. I feel like I can't think properly and I hate it. what the fuck is going on? should I be concerned? what if I've got some kind of infection or something that's really serious?

me later on after having to take a single co-codamol tablet for our post-op pain and then promptly forgetting that I took the meds: huh, that's weird. I suddenly feel way less ill and I can think more clearly and... ohhh fuck okay

[calamitys-child]

Chipped my fuckin. tooth.

[ID: a simplistic white line drawing of a snarling wolf snout. The wolf has a nostril ring and a large chip taken out of one fang]

[asherlockstudy]

SAD POST

I am so at the lowest of lows right now

I sense that my wisdom teeth are getting angry and somehow simultaneously a forgotten impacted canine that my orthodontist FORGOT and thus completed my HELLA EXPENSIVE treatment without pulling out the freaking adult canine which means that it will eventually get out and I will have to remove my permanent retainer, pull out the baby canine and then do new orthodontics to put the adult canine in the proper place…. Anyway the canine seems to get antsy as well and I have so much pressure in my jaw right now, not only because three teeth are trying to erupt but also because my permanent retainer stops them from actually erupting 🙃 the battle of the titans in my jaw

And it would all be fine if I did not have gigantic molars in a very narrow and delicate lower jaw which means that my wisdom teeth are of course fully impacted and basically behind my cheek. I saw a YouTube video by a mature orthodontist titled “the hardest wisdom tooth I ever extracted” and the scan of that tooth looked a little easier than mine hahaHA 🥲🥲🥲 And also the patient was younger and male with much wider jaws than me so no contest I beat him hands down.

And not only my jaw is very small and delicate and pulling out the third molars will probably put too much pressure for it to handle but also I have huge reasons to believe (ie sporadic spasms that happen a few times per year) that one or more of these impacted teeth sit on my alveolar nerve which makes me a perfect candidate for nerve damage during these extractions.

And it’s not just that but in my country oral surgeons perform with local anaesthesia unless you break your face in an accident or something and NO SIR I am not having this shit with local anaesthesia. Did it once with the most freakish impacted upper canine in existence and I am not fucking doing it again. But I don’t know where to go, they all use only local, even clinics in the capital avoid sedation or iv.

I am in a constant extreme worry and of course that took a toll to my GI tract issues and I am having huge bloating and heart ache (it’s from the bowels projecting there, I had it before).

Also I once again might have to soon get out of my own house due to nightmarish neighbours about to come to the apartment upstairs and I know for a fact these are going to be worse than the bastard living in it three years ago and even worse those are the owners of the apartment, so if they come, you know they are staying for life. Which means I can’t stay in mine. Even though I am also an owner.

And I am just observing that I must be one of the globally best cases of extreme somatisation. Because all my concerns, even minor inconveniences, have a severe and even immediate consequence on my body. My worries lead to severe eczema and scratching that I cannot stop. I am bleeding from my hands and legs. My allergies are amazing, they really are largely psychological, the moment a person I find annoying enters the room I am in, I start sneezing, it is unbelievable. If a clothe doesn’t sit on me right, when I am in a hurry, in the most minor unpleasant temperature change, I start sneezing nonstop. I am a bloody nut job. Mentally, in the way I behave I am a pretty pliable and patient person I think and all my frustration gets out physically. I can’t believe me.

By the way I know a visit to a therapist or a prescription of some medication might be long due. I am very aware of many things, at least awareness is not a problem with me. I just want to vent here.

[robinruns]

What a day. Oof.

(editing Robin here, this got long, sticking it under a cut)

I couldn't get up to get a workout in... or make lunch for myself... or breakfast. I did pack my gym bag with the intention of going to the gym after work because it is both hot (summer) and the air quality is garbage (Canada blowing smoke on us). First hour of work was literally one of the most excruciatingly boring meetings I've had to sit through. We got a massive software update and it will taking used to since so many things are just like second nature to me. There are lots of bugs still that kinda make me question why they weren't sorted out in the literal years this has been in development. It's gonna be even more of a cluster fuck tomorrow I think because we have to do the end of the month work. Oh and the fuckin window washers were there so I think I lost a solid hour and a half right off the top this morning. Ugh.

Not having a lunch meant I had to go to the grocery store for lunch. Going to the grocery store meant going out in the gross haze, and then of course, bad choices were made. Bad choices that involve getting a big bag of chocolates and then eating like 90% of it, so my therapist will be hearing about that on... whatever fuckin day I have therapy again. Next Thursday? I dunno. I had to cancel my appointment this week because I had to take my car to the mechanic. Then karma came around and I got my massage appointment (that was supposed to be this afternoon) canceled on me. Whatever. It's not like it wasn't already rescheduled once.

So with a gut full of chocolate, almonds, and bad choices, I went home instead of the gym. Well not directly home, I stopped off at the library and got the book I placed on hold last week. I dunno how long I have it for though. Whoops. My mom says the shortest time that you can have a book checked out is typically 2 weeks, so I'm gonna try to have it done in two weeks.

With all the commotion this morning I completely forgot about Frank's reverb sale until about 10:30 and of course like everything was gone. Oh well. I did get the We Didn't Start the Fire (1989-2023) (Fall Out Boy's Version) (from the Vault) 7" vinyl though. And the Benadryl Subreddit 7" from LS Dunes as well the other day. And new Taking Back Sunday is coming on Friday. Small glimmers of hope on the horizon.

I just feel mentally and emotionally spent this week and we're only halfway through. Tumblr hasn't been the refuge it sometimes is, so I deleted the app from my phone with the intention of just clearing my head from it for a while. I get notifs of asks and I'm like "Oh great, what method of suicide will the anons be suggesting now? Will they be creative this time, or go with an old standby?" Fun times.

I lowkey (highkey) hate that I'm hungry right now. Like I know mentally that I have had a disgusting and inappropriate amount of food this afternoon, but sadly chocolates are not filling. The self loathing is high. The desire to do something desperate is high. The knowledge that my clothes won't fit well is weighing (ha) down on me like crazy and it just makes me panic and again, makes me want to overcorrect in the other direction. How did I end up on the mailing list for 75 Hard? Probably another time like this. But maybe it's what I need? But do they account for dangerously hazardous weather with their outdoor workout requirement? Like? I get the idea of getting out in the rain or cold, but like wildfire smoke? Eh.

So the last few days have not been fun. Could be worse (NOT A SUGGETSION UNIVERSE), but sure as hell could be better.

[muzzyca]

Ayo team Ehlers Danlos Syndrome I am calling on you to answer a question of mine.

We all know teeth is a rough subject for us, I have been diagnosed with "soft teeth" until my eds diagnosis. To my dentist it was the only explanation to my persistent cavities despite obsessive hygiene.

This is the second time I've lost a filling. This morning I pulled out abt half a tooth. Merry Christmas to me I guess.

Basically....

[normal-newt]

I love that I’ve gone from “it’s a new year things are gonna be okay” to “right well maybe I can go five minutes without needing to book an urgent GP appointment again” in less time than it takes to get through a medical waiting list here.

[rabbithaver]

on my way to a surprise dentist appointment. i am experiencing a trauma response

[kinsey3furry300]

I'm sorry but in this scenario you go straight to graverobbing, not murder. You dress a dead body in you clothes and official signet and burn your quarters down.

That way you get an interlude with a pair of comic grave diggers and a fun little montage of dressing a cadaver in you clothes before it all inevitably goes arse over tit.

The Camerlengo walking in on Machete as he and Vasco are struggling with a corpse dressed as a cardinal. "I... your eminence, what's the meaning of this outrage?"

Vasco, thinking quickly: "Just another vatican corpse trial."

If only Machete wasn't so distinctly white and waifish. Otherwise one could possibly use a lookalike to fake his death and just run away with vasco. But finding someone that resembles machete would be almost as hard as making the choice to end a life to save your own.

.

[semiverbalmuppet]

TW: anxiety, medical talk, dental talk

[orangechickenpillow]

Everybody place your bets: will I get hit by a bus by the end of the week

[harrywavycurly]

Lasagna Casserole: A Harry Styles AU One Shot✨

Masterlist: Here

Pairing: Killer!Harry x Wife!Reader

TW: Harry is a serial killer(yeah you read that correctly), mentions of blood, handling of a body after death.

A/N: This is random as hell and honestly it’s not even that dark minus the fact Harry does kill people BUT you’ll never really see how, but I get it if this isn’t your thing. I just had to get it out of my brain to make room for other stuff.

Summary: You call your husband Harry while he’s working because you don’t know what to bring to your company potluck, enjoy you having no clue what your man really does for work and Harry not hesitating to answer your call no matter how busy he is✨

“Really?” Harry shoots his coworker and longtime friend Mitch a glare as he spots his long brown hair falling around his face as the two of them look at the body in the trunk of a rental car. “You don’t have a hair tie? You’re going to leave hair follicles all over the body and we aren’t exactly supposed to even know who the fuck this man is.” He snaps making Mitch let out a huff as he pulls out a scrunchie from his back pocket so he can quickly put his hair in a low bun.

“Hair follicles? You’ve been watching that show again haven’t you?” Mitch asks as he grabs his bag from the trunk and slings the strap over his shoulder.

“It’s called forensic files and it’s a good show.” Harry says with a shrug as he grabs his duffle bag before closing the trunk. “You could learn a thing or two actually because did you know they can get DNA from inside someone’s teeth? Like not just dental records and all that. Like if you don’t do a proper job at pulling them out they can somehow get like the pulp or some-”

“Are you saying I don’t do a good job?” Mitch tilts his head to the side as he looks at Harry who just shakes his head and reaches over and gives his friend a reassuring pat on the shoulder.

“You kidding? You’re an artist with a pair of pliers in your hand.” Harry watches as a small smile appears on his face as the two of them begin making their way towards a familiar section of woods near the end of the deserted parking lot. “But the show teaches you a lot of weird mistakes other people have made like really you’d be shocked at some of the odd shit people do when killing someone.” This makes Mitch raise an eyebrow as he digs around in his bag for a flashlight, he pushes the on button to make sure it works and nods in approval to himself when it turns on without any issue.

“Like what?” He asks as he turns the flashlight off before handing it to Harry who puts it in his duffle bag, Mitch is always in charge of making sure the two of them have their kits properly stocked for after the job is done. While Harry is more so in charge of making sure they have everything they could possibly need to get the job done however the two of them see fit, it always depends on their mood and who the person is as to how they go about handling it but both of them usually prefer to be as clean and quick as possible.

“Biting.” Harry states as he grabs the gloves Mitch hands to him, he catches the look of disgust flash across his friend’s face and he just nods in agreement. “Yeah I know. It’s like a thing though apparently? It’s been a major factor on a few episodes on how the killers get caught because they leave their bite marks on their victims.” He explains as he slips the gloves into his front pocket so he’ll be able to reach them quicker a little later on when it comes time to take the man out of the trunk.

“Fucking weirdos.” Mitch mumbles as he leads the way down to the trail the two of them have used quite a few times since they found it over a year ago.

“Another thing is footwear.” Harry says with a huff as he adjusts his duffle bag on his shoulder. “The things these people can do to trace your shoes back to you is a little concerning but also very neat.” Mitch lets out a chuckle as Harry continues to talk about the odd things that could potentially get a murderer caught.

“Do I need different shoes?” Mitch asks as they begin to get a little deeper into the woods using the trail.

“No your shoes are fine but just know they can be traced back to you.”

“Like to me specifically or just to where I bought them?”

“To you. I watched them go from making an impression of someone’s shoe to them finding the store and from there finding the owner of the damn shoe.”

“Jesus. Well I can’t just be out here barefoot.”

“Well no shit.”

“So what should I do Mr. Forensic Files?”

“I’m not saying you need to do anything just be aware-” Harry stops his rant making Mitch turn and look at him and that’s when he notices Harry has also stopped walking, Mitch opens his mouth to say something but Harry is quick to hold a finger up as he grabs his phone out of his back pocket allowing the faint buzzing sound to be heard since Harry was smart enough to turn the ringer off but made sure he’d still know if you called or texted him. A smile takes over his face when he sees your name flashing on the screen, Mitch rolls his eyes as he watches Harry slide his thumb across the screen so he can answer the call.

“Hey baby.” Harry says sweetly into the phone as he gives Mitch a look that tells him to continue walking, Harry hears you let out a sigh of relief as the two of them continue down the unused bike trail just outside the cities largest cemetery, it’s a rather nice trail but Harry understands why it’s untouched seeing as not many people enjoy an afternoon or evening ride so close to a few hundred people’s final resting place.

“Oh thank god you answered.” Your voice is full of panic as you run a hand through your hair while standing in the middle of your kitchen.

“S’everything alright love?” He asks as Mitch walks a bit ahead of him so he can start the process of finding where exactly the man they just took care of is going to go and if he’s going to need to dig multiple holes or not. “What’s got you all worked up?” Harry adjusts the strap of his duffle bag on his shoulder as he hears the sound of pages being turned quite harshly and quickly so he can only assume you’re in the kitchen because when he looks down at his watch on his right hand it’s not even half past five so there’s no way you’re already in bed reading your romance novel you keep tucked away in your nightstand.

Now Harry wouldn’t say he knows exactly what you’re doing at every hour of the day but he would say he has a faint idea of what you could possibly be up to, but he blames that on his job because he can’t exactly not know your whereabouts when he’s out dealing with people in an unsavory way. He needs to at least have a roundabout time frame of when you’re going to be gone at work, or off to the shops with the girls or his favorite is when you go off with his mom and sister for the day because that means he doesn’t have to rush or be worried he will run into you while discarding a body in the woods or a nearby park. The one thing Harry prides himself on is that he won’t ever have to worry about coming home covered in someone else’s blood and scaring the absolute daylights out of you. Since meeting you he refuses to ever even give you the opportunity to accidentally see anything you shouldn’t so he always just showers and takes care of his dirty clothes at a hotel and a dry cleaners he’s been using for years that if you slide them extra cash don’t ask questions about all the odd red stains on his dress shirts.

“I don’t know what to make for my work’s potluck tomorrow and I’m just a bit panicked because you know Regina is going to make those brownies that everyone dies for and I just-I want to make something good.” The words leave your mouth in a rush but Harry is used to your rants, having been married to you for three years but dated you for two before hand, he’s no stranger to you putting these sort of things off till the last minute then getting yourself worked up and stressed over it until you finally cave and ask him for help because that’s the other thing, you won’t ask him for help until you absolutely need to.

Harry looks at Mitch who is eyeing a decent sized area of land that Harry knows for a fact neither of them have hidden anyone else in, so when Mitch looks over at Harry with a raised brow he just holds a finger up making the long haired man let out a sigh as he places his hands on his hips. The thing is Mitch can’t even really get that annoyed with Harry in this situation because he knows how much the man truly loves and adores his wife, he’s seen him put a pause on slicing someone’s throat once just because you called and then there was the time Harry nearly set the whole house on fire instead of just the man’s car they had just paid a visit to because he was distracted by your multiple drunk texts during a girls night out back when the two of you were just dating and wasn’t looking where the lighter fluid was spilling before he lit the match. So this isn’t anything new to Mitch, standing aside and letting Harry take a few minutes to talk to you during a work night, he knows you have no clue what you’re even calling in the middle of and honestly sometimes both men need the distraction of your randomly timed calls or texts.

“Tell me your options baby and I’ll help you pick the one I think your coworkers will like the most.” Harry quickly takes the phone away from his ear and hits the mute button before he hits the speaker button so he will be able to hear you but you won’t be able to hear him. “Think he’ll fit in this spot in one piece?” Harry asks making Mitch take a harder look at the area before looking back at Harry.

“Yeah he’s a small dude he’ll fit here just fine.” Mitch answers making Harry smile because he hates cutting people up it’s way too bloody for his taste and he just got these boots as a random gift from you a few days ago and he’d hate to get them bloodied so soon because Mitch does a lot of things but dismemberment has always been a hard no for him leaving the task to Harry.

“I can do lasagna casserole? Or tuna casserole? People love a good tuna casserole.” Your voice brings Harry’s attention back to you as Mitch drops his bag down and opens it up so he can look for his shovel. Harry unmutes you and puts you off speaker as he brings the phone back up to his ear.

“There’s no such thing as a good tuna casserole my love.” Harry laughs when he hears you let out a scoff and he can practically picture you with your hand on your chest making a dramatic face as if he just insulted you in the worst way imaginable.

“I must’ve called the wrong number because my husband loves my tuna casserole. He’s told me so on several occasions.” You move the hand that was clutching your chest down to your hip as you try to hold back a laugh because you know very well that Harry tells you he loves everything you cook, even when the bottom of the pie is burnt or the rice is overdone he looks at you with a warm smile and tells you how delicious it is.

“I think it’s more so that your husband just loves you sweetheart. That’s all.” He explains making you smile against the phone.

“You really don’t like my tuna casserole?” Your voice is softer now and Harry feels a twinge of guilt hit his chest but he just brushes it off because the truth is always best, or at least in situations like these.

“I’m sorry baby but it’s not my favorite.” He figures avoiding telling you the words he doesn’t like it will help you not be too upset because the last thing he wants to do right now if make you upset when he’s currently in the middle of the woods near a cemetery with his bestfriend digging a grave for a man they have in a trunk of a car. “But the lasagna casserole sounds lovely.” He quickly adds as he drops his duffle bag next to Mitch’s and looks down at the watch on his wrist so he can try to give you a decent estimate on when he’ll be home when you ask, because he knows you’re going to ask eventually.

“Yeah? I’m not sure. I’ve made something similar once and Todd told me it was bland and a bit dry but he just-”

“Todd? Who’s that sweetheart? Haven’t mentioned him before is he new?” Mitch quirks a brow at Harry’s questions because he knows that tone. It’s the one Harry uses when he is trying to cover up the anger that’s starting to simmer deep down inside of him but Mitch just doesn’t understand what would make the man angry over a discussion about casseroles for a company potluck.

“He started in my department last year I think you met him at the Christmas party? Remember he was the one who asked about your tattoos and if-”

“The twat who tried to get you under the mistletoe before I showed up is Todd?” Harry doesn’t mean to let his voice get as loud as it does and he really didn’t mean to let the insult slip out because he knows you don’t like that kind of talk but you just ignore it because you know how your husband gets when you mention people who have been slightly rude to you, especially men. He’s always been a bit protective of you and it’s something you’ve grown to love about him even if it did take some getting used to in the beginning because well, Harry can be very intimidating when he wants to be and sometimes when he’s not even trying.

“That’s what happens when you show up late to things Harry. People try to smooch your wife.” Harry rolls his eyes as he runs his free hand through his hair, he knows you’re joking to try to lighten his mood but he also knows you’re well aware of how slightly possessive he is of you even though he does try his very hardest to keep it under wraps but he doesn’t take things like other people trying to put the moves on you very lightly.

“I just think Todd could do with a few lessons on proper manners that’s all love.” Mitch gives Harry a look as he pauses his digging and Harry just ignores him as turns so he’s facing away from Mitch. “So what’s the verdict hmm? Lasagna or tuna casserole?” He doesn’t want to seem like he’s rushing you but the sooner he’s off the phone with you the sooner the hole gets dug and the body is in the ground the sooner he’s on his way back home to you.

“Lasagna.” You answer as you flip to the page for the recipe in your cookbook. “When will you be home? I miss you.” You ask with a slight pout because Harry was gone when you woke up this morning and only stopped by on his lunch break to see you for a bit before he was rushing off again to go meet Mitch. Harry can’t help but find himself smiling at the sound of your little pouty whine telling him you miss him because he knows that just means you’ll be extra clingy when he gets home and to be honest he quite likes it when you’re in your clingy cuddly mood because it helps him relax after dealing with all the stress of what he’s had to do during the day.

“I’ll be home by the time you’re ready for your evening bath my love so make sure you put in one of those little bubble things I like okay? The one that makes you all soft and smells like vanilla.” He can hear you smile over the phone and it makes him grin, he loves being able to make you smile even when he’s not around. “I’ve got to go now baby but I love you okay? Keep me updated on the casserole and please be careful with the oven? Don’t want you burning yourself.” He says with a smile as he hears you giggle through the phone when he tells you to be careful with the oven.

“I love you too and I’ll send you a photo when it’s done and if you’re good maybe I’ll let you try some when you get home.” Harry laughs and just nods his head and tells you goodbye and that he loves you one more time before hanging up and putting his phone back in his pocket.

“We aren’t killing Todd.” Is all Mitch says as Harry turns around and he just rolls his eyes when he sees Mitch doesn’t even bother looking at him from where he’s at still working on the hole for the man in the trunk. “We have rules Harry. We don’t kill people we know or anyone that people we care about might know.” He adds as if he can hear inside Harry’s mind at how he was about to stupidly ask why they couldn’t just get rid of Todd.

“Every rule has an exception.” Harry argues as he bends down to open his duffle bag so he can grab his shovel and begin helping Mitch dig the hole.

“The answer is still no.” Mitch fires back making Harry suddenly stop digging as he gets a playful smirk on his face causing Mitch to pause his movements and quirk a brow at him.

“You said we can’t kill him.” Harry states mater of factly making Mitch just slowly nod, he already has a feeling he knows where this is going and he’s not going to like it. “But we can beat the shit out of him right?” Mitch can’t help but laugh and shake his head as he looks down at the ground because of course Harry is going to find a loophole, hell Mitch would too if it was his wife that got hit on and told her casserole wasn’t good so he can’t blame him.

“Sure Harry we can beat him up but just make sure you don’t accidentally kill him okay?”

“Oh come on that was one time you’ve got to let it go.”

[c0ntr0lledchaos]

Hey so I just had what I believe to be a root canal filling come out and I have zero money in my bank account so if anyone is interested in a commission or willing to donate to me on ko-fi I would very much appreciate that!

And if you can't do either please reblog this so your friends and followers that might be interested see!

I'm Opening Commissions!

I went in for yet another job interview where they were not honest on the job posting about the starting wage of the position, so if you like my art and want to get a custom drawing, please consider buying a commission!

Payments will be going through Ko-fi and there will be a limited number of slots. First come first serve!

If interested please fill out this form or DM me if you have any questions!

[outsidersheadcanons]

can you do some Steve Randle angst hcs

Sure!! TW for mentions of child abuse, insecurity, and mild self harm

-So Steve has anger issues and a lot of them stem from insecurity and not being able to develop emotionally (because of the abuse he faced at home at the hands of his father).

- He also has attachment issues and an intense fear of abandonment, which was caused by his mother abandoning him at a young age. Dally and Johnny’s deaths really messed him up for a while as well.

- He really hates crying and talking abt how he feels. Because of this he lashes out at school to let his emotions out. He’s been suspended multiple times for fighting.

- Steve also has a bad habit of punching walls when he gets upset, sometimes to the point where he bleeds. Soda was really upset with him when he found out about it.

- Steve thinks he’s really ugly (and it didn’t help that his mom always told him he was the ugliest out of his siblings when he was little). Slowly with the gang’s help his self image is improving, but he still finds himself getting angry when he looks in the mirror.

- Most of his insecurities stem from his teeth. He hates them so much he barely smiles in pictures, or in general.

(abt his teeth cause im kinda a dental nerd but when he was a kid he got into a pretty serious accident which caused the nerve in his front tooth to die, giving it a gray color. it was also pushed up slightly from the impact. sorry guys i like teeth 🤓)

[dead-boys-club]

seems like body is starting to reject safe foods, too, now.. some venting under the cut.

tw; eating issues, getting sick, medical/health related talk.

i am so... fucking exhausted. in every way. gastroparesis is a bitch — i thought i finally found a diet that would work, yaknow? i was doing good. but, it seems like those foods are being rejected. ive spent the last thirty minutes emptying my body until ive busted blood vessels and gotten a bloody nose. my body is under so much stress, it's unreal. im tired of being paranoid about food and being in pain — pain that never goes away.

it's either migraines, stomach pain, muscle pain, back, knees..

i am dealing with issue after fucking issue stacked on top of each other like some twisted game of janga that's dictating my life. not only do i have gastroparesis but juggling it with fibromyalgia? rheumatoid arthritis? migraines, nar, deficiencies out of the ass at this point, im on depo + have endometriosis. and good God if it's not the physical, it's the mental because dealing with borderline among other things it's ripping me apart at the seams.

and it's so fucking lonely. no one wants to stick around for the people dealing with things. ive got three friends who are usually busy, not into the things i am, and it sucks not being able to have more casual, chill friends.

i feel like every day im getting closer and closer to just keeling over.

let's not even start on the dental issues — throwing up every day for like, 14 years fucks up your teeth and it's a billion dollars because state insurance fucking hates you. i can't even go to a chiropractor for my spine and arthritis issues because insurance doesn't cover that and i don't make enough from my etsy BUT don't qualify for disability BUT CANT WORK because i can't get the accommodations — yes, i have applied for remote jobs and have yet to hear back from any.

i am exhausted. im doing my best. but it's really, really draining and it's hard.

im sitting on my bathroom floor, too tired/weak to get up and im trying not to cry atp lol

[wands-and-w1ngz]

VICKY RELATIONSHIP HEADCANON POOOOST :3

general tw for parental and peer abuse

———————————————————

• vicky’s parents used to be really abusive toward her because of her attitude issues and they had her at an “inconvenient” time. they softened up a lot toward tootie which caused a lot of feelings of jealousy and lashing out.

• in her teen years her family was very scared of her because of her defense mechanisms against the abuse she faced, growing the mentality that nobody could hurt her if she hurt them first.

• tootie still loves her despite the bad blood, and they do get along sometimes. it’s a very rocky dynamic.

• vicky used to be best friends with dale for many years, both of them bonding over mutual interests and shitty parents.

• her obsession with money came about because she wanted to move away from her parents as soon as possible, so she’d do any odd job that would pay. dale didn’t like to be associated with his family in his younger years so he kept it a secret even from vicky, so she had no idea about the kind of money he had access to.

• doug was very neglectful of dale and usually felt like he was in the way of his work, so eventually dale was allowed to just stay with vicky for as long as he wanted. he felt like he’d be happier with a friend, and vicky felt like she’d be safer and have help getting the money she needed.

• for a while their working dynamic was mostly healthy, but it devolved into vicky demanding work out of him and forcing him to do jobs, mostly for her lemonade stand! she’d have it up for all the hot months, then switch to cocoa in the winter and fall.

• she had him work especially hard the time she wanted tickets on top of her moving fund, and grabbed two random boys she was acquainted with to speed up the process. she let THEM go after she got what she wanted, and swung back to other jobs once dale had gone and couldn’t do work for her anymore.

• she never physically hurt him, but was still very demanding and would threaten or guilt trip him when she needed to. most of his teeth rotted out from a lack of care which needed a lot of dental work when he eventually went home.

• they haven’t spoken to each other in decades, but they think of each other a lot. dale is still terrified of her, but misses her and the good times they had together. vicky holds a lot of regret for all of the terrible things she’s done and continues to do, but she doesn’t know how to apologize and process trauma so she doubles down on her bad choices.

• they COULD amend their relationship if they really tried. they probably won’t.

• the other girls she knew as a teenager were incredibly toxic toward her. they pushed her to be worse and would emotionally and mentally abuse her if she went against them. if she hadn’t met them, she’d still have been pretty awful, but she would have been kinder to timmy and dale.

• mark is all here for vicky being a vicious beast but he IS trying to encourage her to heal and be less violent, he knows it’s hurting her in the long run.

• and they’re married, because i always thought they were cute! i hope we get to see mark again in ANW

• she does get along somewhat with timmy in current years. they still argue plenty, and there’s a good amount of resentment held, but they can laugh with each other now.