#definitely was fun doodling formal shit

[sunsetno4]

face and formal for vendetta? :3

Ah, thank you so so much! <3

face: Describe your OC’s face. What’s their smile like? Are their orbs cerulean? What would someone notice first when looking at them?

"Ne looks an angry little alley cat." That was probably the first thought I had about Vendetta's appearance, lol. But let's tackle this question backwards because the last question is the most interesting. >:3

The first thing people notice is they can't hold an image of Vendetta in their mind. Vendetta's face might as well be a bunch of puzzles pieces, mixed up and jolting away from each other like repelling magnets. They might remember green, but not why the color comes to mind. Maybe it's a bland smile, no. It was an endless pout! Maybe? Was it? No ones meets Vendetta and leaves with a solid impression (with few exceptions), even back in the pre-HB days. Ne really doesn't want to be noticed and it bleeds out hard. I think most people would write it off as nem just being unexpectional.

But if you hang around long enough, stuff starts to stick better.

Mild green eyes, seemingly miles after but it's a deception. Don't fall for it. After the Void though, there's sometimes flashes of this unnatural poisonous green in them. Scary. Only happens when Vendetta gets emotional, so rare to see for most people.

Typically, it's an unimpressed frown but sometimes a real smile sneaks through, bigger and brighter than one would expect from such a sullen seeming soul. Ne never seems afraid to show nir teeth when smiling. Pointy little canines, would hurt to be bit by. Isn't afraid to bite either. Avoid.

So, so many freckles. Eyebags galore. You think ne could sleep a hundred days, but they would still persist. It just feels like a Vendetta thing ultimately, not something to truly worry about. Broken nose, but oh. Was that because of Owl? Or, was it broken before? It's hard to say, even after knowing nem for years.

Because while you might be able to hold down a few pieces to form impressions, remembering Vendetta's face as a whole is always tricky and hard to do, exponentially so after Heartbreak. Pieces are just easier.

(Unless you're Ortega, of course.)

formal: What’s your OC’s formal look? Do they like dressing up? Do they have different looks for different occasions?

Ahhhhh, that's complicated. Vendetta enjoys dressing up, to a degree. Getting dressed up is fun, as ne loves finding and wearing interesting and chunky jewelry and flowy gowns with a fair amount bare skin as Deja. Ne only wears formal clothes while working though, and that brings up one too many negative and conflicting emotions from nir time at the Farm, and it honestly makes nem feel sick the more ne does it as Deja.

(Silly Gala Deja doodle, btw.)

Vendetta nemself really doesn't do formal clothes, and there's no way anyone is convincing nem to wear any outside of work (and even then, ne wore this to nir Hollow Ground meeting, sooooooo??).

If ne did have a reason to wear formal as nemself (outside of work, like for fun as strange as the idea is), definitely smart fitted blazers, for sure! God, ne would love them. Like bright colors and/or funky prints, orange would be fun! Suspenders too!! \m/!! If it wasn't for nir tattoos, ne would love forgoing a shirt too. Because even Ven trying out formal, it isn't gonna to be super formal. ^^;;

[50cal-fullauto-astarion]

what smiley face would they use the most if they had a phone (changing this to emoji in general)

hobby or interest they are most embarrassed about (PLEASE tell what brings shame to the Durge Boy)

what mundane human job would they have in modern society to pay the bills and do they like it

their top 3 songs on repeat name a toxic trait of theirs that is really just a beige flag at best

THANK YOU BABE EHEHEHHEEH ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 I’m going to answer for both of these smelly bitches bc I can dghj

1. what smiley face would they use the most if they had a phone

Yder’s a definite tie between 🖕 and 😐. Yder is constantly expressing annoyance, whether fondly or genuinely.

Scorpio oh man. I feel like he’s by and large a FaceTime or voice note sort of dude, and his emoji game is fuckin whack and inscrutable fghhd. He’s giving me HUGE 🔫, 🔪, 👊 vibes though, with a dash of 🙇, 🤡, and 🥰. Also maybe a few of these 🐂 bc I feel like he’s got an obsession with the strange ox and he just NEEDS ppl to know he’s thinking about it again.

6. hobby or interest they are most embarrassed about

HUEHUEHUE YESSSS. Oh god this hit me like a ton of bricks, and it’s making me cringe in sympathy embarrassment, but I feel like my poor Durge baby Scorpio has a REALLY pretty voice. Like REALLY pretty, nice and gravelly and deep. Anyway where I’m going with this is smth smth he narrates erotica and/or creates porn ASMR audios. Slaps them on Patreon, makes a mint even though he’s just doing it for fun, but if ANYONE caught him recording whimpering audios, he’d send himself straight to hell. I owe him a formal apology dfhh. He sounds like Ghost Call Of Duty |’:

Real time life update I almost got shit on by a fuckin bird

YDER. So I had to think about this a minute - NOT bc she doesn’t have shame, she has that in spades, but omfg she’s so like Go And Do that she wouldn’t have time for a hobby, let alone an embarrassing one. Oh god no I figured it out. She’s low key kind of a furry/scalie and she’s got sonas for each that she doodles a lot. One’s a water monitor and one’s a mongoose 😭😭 YDER I’M SO SORRY. I’ll give her one redeeming quality, her art Twitter is fucking insane. SECONDARY EMBARRASSMENT: this is the actual one bc it popped in my head but I think the furry thing is funny enough to leave, but she has a huge assortment of romance themed pinboards that she likes to edit and curate and if ANYONE saw them, she’d ruin their life.

15. what mundane human job would they have in modern society to pay the bills and do they like it

Yder’s is boring and immoral, but she’s a computer hardware engineer for fantasy!L*ckheed M*rtin while she’s pursuing her master’s. ): She likes it bc she’s good at it and it pays a lot, but not on its own merits.

Scorpio — my brain IMMEDIATELY said barista and dog walker?? *ETA: also is a bouncer at a shitty dive bar known for violent patrons. I mean he’s probably super married to Gale and living in luxury in Waterdeep like a trophy wife, so he’s just doing both of those to have something to do and some pocket change, even though Gale 8000% gave Scorpio a black card tied to his accounts that he can use freely. Plus he’s got the Patreon audio porn racket going on, he’s just doing shit for a laff at this point lol.

19. their top 3 songs on repeat

THIS ONE IS SO GOOD. All Spotify links!

Yder: Hot Knife - Fiona Apple (gives her Astarion feels, Abs she’ll annoy him by tugging his ear and going, “If I’m butter, if I’m butter, then he’s a hot knife.”) Беспонтовый пирожок - Grazhdanskaya Oborona (THIS SLAPS THANK YOU FOR THE REC WARDS!!). Ederlezi - Barcelona Gipsy Klezmer Orchestra (this version is so fuckin good it got me to change her name).

Scorpio: Dirty Harry - Gorillaz. Anywhere I Lay My Head - Tom Waits (ANY Tom Waits song lbr, but this one is special and probably the song he associates most with Gale). Coal - Dylan Gossett (he’s my loves-country boy, and this song makes him feel seen).

27. name a toxic trait of theirs that is really just a beige flag at best

THIS one really had me thinking bc they’re both literally decimated with toxic traits, but bending them into beige flags is a trick dghj.

Yder: oh god so her selfishness and manipulative tendencies are omnipresent and bulletproof, but 💀💀 safe really DOES use it to improve the lives of the ppl she cares about. She’s an insular, horrid woman who rarely cares if she has to kill to get her way, but she’ll put that to use to beg, borrow, steal her friends’ ways into better lives. It’s a nice bonus if it sets her up nice, too.

Scorpio: He is EXTREMELY fucking clingy and possessive—whether it’s Gale, his friends, or just someone he considers ‘Mine Mine Mine,’ like the Finding Nemo gulls. But uhhh woof his loyalty is SERIOUSLY unmatched. And you’ll never be lonely if you have his number and want to hang out!

Bonus: they’re both in insanely codependent relationships 🤪🤪 but it makes their partners feel loved, wanted, and secure! That’s kind of like getting an A in relationships, right?

[lady-literature]

ayy, so ya’ll know that Miraculous/DC crossover I screamed about a while back? I found plot for it.

It is not quite finished yet, but it’s also so much longer than I originally planned on it being. (me: I’ll just write a fun little thing to get this out of my head!

me, 13k words later: oh no)

SO! Here’s a little sneak peak!

(or, find the finished product here!)

***

There is an unspoken rule, kept by any outsider who’s ever set foot in Gotham, that you should only ever visit the city once. Most find that visiting even once was already too much.

The most dangerous city on earth isn’t kind to its residents—much less strangers who don’t know how to watch their pockets or keep off the streets after dark. It’s gotten better, perhaps, in recent years since the Bat started lurking on rooftops, but that doesn’t mean the city is good.

Normal people stay as far from Gotham as they can get.

Marinette, (un)luckily, is far from normal.

***

The touring of Metropolis, New York City, and Gotham had been going well as far as Marinette was concerned, no matter what Chloé says to her about carelessness and naivety.

She’s glad her, Adrien and Chloé all decided to take this summer trip before they started University in the fall. It sucks that it was just the three of them, she wishes more of their friends could’ve tagged along but, alas, it wasn’t meant to be.

Kagami was in the middle of training season and couldn’t come. Luka was touring with his father, learning the tricks of the trade and other things. Nathaniel had already been commissioned to paint a mural downtown before they really finalized dates. Nino was in much the same boat as Nath, just with music and pitch meetings. Felix hated traveling and Alix was doing… something. Time travelling, probably. Or at least spending more time in the burrow.

Marinette was certainly starting to notice the way she’s begun talking about ancient history like she was actually there when she goes on rants now. Felix also probably noticed but Marinette’s also sure that he’s aiding and abetting her in exchange for insider information so…

She’ll probably have to deal with that later, unfortunately. But not today.

Their tour group was going to Amusement Mile later that afternoon, but had been given free roam until then. Marinette decided to spend the time up until lunch at the park near the meetup spot in Gotham Square and Chloé hadn’t complained or vetoed that idea so the trio happily camped out on the grass.

Marinette had returned to her sketch of Lady Gotham in between eating bites of her sandwich. She thinks she much preferred the style of it to New York City’s Lady Liberty. There was just something about the Statue of Justice that inspired her.

She’d been doodling about it since they left the marina yesterday. She also had plenty of pictures of the statue for inspiration later. There’s one she especially likes and thinks she might even print out to put up on her wall at home.

She’s playing with the idea of draping fabrics for formal wear designs like the roman togas both Lady statues seem to wear when a tennis ball rolls up and bumps into her leg. She has only enough time to move her sketchbook out of the way before a large dog bowls into her, tail wagging happily and barking up a storm.

“Oof!”

Adrien’s already halfway up the tree, startled out of his light doze by the barking and Chloé only daintily moved away from Marinette, leaving her to her fate. 

Pushing herself back up so she’s not crushed by what feels like one hundred pounds of dog, she comes face to snout with quite possibly the biggest dog she’s ever seen. From there, there was really only one choice of action Marinette could have followed.

“Oh! Well, aren’t you just the prettiest boy?” she tells the dog happily, reaching up to give him scratches. “Such a big boy! You nearly bowled me over, didn’t you?”

If it’s possible, the dog’s tail begins to wag even faster, enough that he accidentally overbalances himself and decides to roll with it, flopping onto his back and letting her rub his stomach. Marinette does so enthusiastically, her baby-talk to the dog devolving into broken not-words and the occasional exclamation of good boy! in both English and French.

The dog was a great dane, and had the softest coat of black fur she’s ever seen. There was a thick red collar around his throat, and Marinette stopped furiously rubbing his belly long enough to look at the silver tag attached to it.

“Titus, huh?” she says to the dog. “Such a strong name for such a distinguished boy, huh?”

“Oh god,” she hears Adrien groan from his spot still up in the tree. When she looks up, she finds him eyeing Titus with distrust, the absolute kitten. “I hope whoever his owner is, they’ve never read Shakespeare.”

Both her and Chloé blink at the strange non sequitur.

“Uh, why? Exactly?”

“Because they have shit taste in his plays if they do! Titus Andronicus is, like, Shakespeare’s worst play.”

Chloé glares up at him. “You’re such a nerd. Now stop being ridiculous and get down from there.”

“But, Chloé! It’s a dog.”

“Adrien Agreste!”

Marinette tunes out the two blondes as they devolve into sibling-like bickering. It’s a skill she’s had to learn and learn quickly with living in such close quarters with the pair for the last few weeks and also being friends with the pair for the past three years.

“Speaking of your owner, I wonder where they are?” She scratches under Titus’ chin thoughtfully. “Should we go look for them?”

Titus' head flops to the side, almost like he’s listening for something, before he’s clambering up onto his feet to tower over her. He’s almost twice as tall as she is sitting, which is just ridiculous. Why is everything in America so big?

Getting to her feet herself, Titus still stands almost as tall as her. She can rest her elbow on his back when she grabs his collar to make sure he doesn’t run off. He leads mostly, pulling her along at a steady trot she has to jog to keep up with.

He truly was such a well behaved dog and certainly lived up to his breed’s reputation as a gentle giant.

Or at least she thought so, until the call of “Titus! Here!” echoes through the park and he goes racing off towards it, dragging Marinette along for the ride no matter how much she tries to slow down.

Titus comes to a skidding stop, and Marinette barely stops herself from falling by keeping her arm around Titus.

“And who are you?”

Looking up, she finds a young man, probably around her age, staring down at her. He does not look happy—but most Gothamites don’t, Marinette’s found. He’s also, despite the almost glare he’s giving her, very attractive.

When she opens her mouth, incoherent French comes tumbling out, much to her embarrassment.

Ah. ‘Not being able to speak coherently to people she finds attractive’, she had wondered where that particular personality trait had been as of late. Even after so many years hanging around people who should be—and are—super models, she still acts like a spaz. Why is she like this?

The man raises an eyebrow at her, looking very unamused.

She tries again. “Ah- Je suis- I mean, I am very sorry. Your dog found me sitting over there with my friends and I figured I should find his owner instead of letting him just wander around and I assume your his owner because if you aren’t this is very embarrassing for me. Not that it wasn’t embarrassing before but, oh, I’m definitely rambling and I’m going to shut up now.”

Pressing her lips together as tightly as humanly possible so her tongue will stop making horrible life decisions, she holds Titus’ bright yellow tennis ball out to his owner.

The man huffs, taking the ball from her hand. “I didn’t ask for your life’s story.”

Marinette blinks and then frowns. Her hand tightens around where she’s still holding onto Titus’ collar and she has to very carefully unclench her hand before she breaks it or something.

“I didn’t give it,” she says through clenched teeth, embarrassment abruptly forgotten. There’s no need for the man to be rude.

He scoffs. “Could’ve fooled me.”

She doesn't really have anything to say to that. Instead, she turns to Titus, who’s sitting like the good boy he is. She very seriously leans down to eye level—she does not have to lean down far—and tells him, “Your owner is an ass. But you are still a very good boy.”

She plants a kiss to his forehead that makes his tail wag, gives him one last scratch behind the ears and walks back towards her friends without looking back at the rude man. 

***

Colonel Bug: so I met kagami and felix’s lovechild today

MY HONOR: I would never stoop so low.

the evil twin: I would never stoop so low.

ShutUpTurtleMan: Nettie

dearest

the evil twin: Okay first of all-

ShutUpTurtleMan: sunshine

light of our collective lives and reason I breathe

what the fuCK

YoureUnderAgreste: Kagami, my love, how could you?

The Betrayal™

GottaGoFast: ew

Queen of Salt: ew

sneaky snake: Send pics or it didn’t happen

give me art or give me death: [a photo of the ‘right in front of my salad?’ meme]

Queen of Salt: wait

I was with you all day when did this happen?

was it the owner of the dog that attacked you?

ShutUpTurtleMan: WHAT

Colonel Bug: he didn’t attack me!

chloe stop spreading misinformation!

titus was a sweetheart!

YoureUnderAgreste: incorrect

he was, in fact, a menace

give me art or give me death: wait was Titus the dog or the lovechild

ShutUpTurtleMan: ^^^ ?

Colonel Bug: shut up adrien

all animals are great

stop being elitist

give me art or give me death: okay but seriously what kind of dog was it

the evil twin: why exactly was he our lovechild?

GottaGoFast: because of the dramatic tryst you and Kagami had obviously

keep up

Colonel Bug: because he was as pretty as he was rude actually

And gave me the feeling that he’d rant about his honor and parentage if it given the chance

MY HONOR: you say something once as an unsocialized teen

GottaGoFast: MARI YOU DOG!

ARE GETTING TAIL IN GOTHAM OF ALL PLACES?

Colonel Bug: no alix

did you not read the part about how rude he is

YoureUnderAgreste: i mean,,,,,

Felix is pretty rude and we all still like him

ShutUpTurtleMan: and Chloe

YoureUnderAgreste: oh good point nino

Colonel Bug: i hate it here

i spoke to him for like 2 seconds

Queen of Salt: Okay first of all-

YoureUnderAgreste: so i mean it’s not really a dealbreaker yaknow?

Colonel Bug: this familys a nightmare

i shoulda left you all on the street corner where i found you

YoureUnderAgreste: BUT CHA DINDT

ShutUpTurtleMan: but yA DIDNT

GottaGoFast: BUT CHA DIDNT!!

sneaky snake: but ya didn’t

***

I have every no regrets. stay tuned for more!

[brandstifter-sys]

Sonnets

Word Count: 2144 (Ao3)

Pairing: Dukexiety with some Creativitwins

Rating: T+

Warnings: Sexual themes, brotherly angst, talk of death

Roman finds a journal and assumes it’s Remus’ but when Remus says it’s not his Roman leaves him with it, so he has some time to read. Little does he know what will come from perusing that book.

-----

Remus was chaos, he didn't bend to anyone else's rules unless he wanted to. Almost nothing was off the table for him—gore, violence, monsters, pain—but he had limits. Don't steal Janus' hat when he isn't holding or wearing it, because an angry Janus meant silence, or worse being silenced and alone. Never ever get too gross with Patton, because he will scream and cry and flash those hideous puppy dog eyes! Stay at least 6 feet away from Logan or suffer through a lecture on how little influence the duke held. Never let Roman hurt himself so bad he can't heal. And never ever read Virgil's diaries. 

Remus was happily throwing shurikens at a large canvas with paint balloons, having fun despite only hitting the ones filled with red. It was just a little annoying to only have one color on a solid white background, and even more annoying when it was Roman's colors staring at him. Roman hadn't been much of a good brother in the past few years, and it stung to think about how they drifted apart. How almost everyone ran from him to Roman. It hurt to be so lonely. 

"Greetings, Your Disgrace!" Roman said as he entered the castle atrium suddenly. Remus threw another star that lodged itself in the canvas with a splash and a thump, and grinned manically at the unsettled prince. 

"Well if it isn't MacBetty himself!" Remus said and cracked his neck sharply, "What hell did I probably unleash on you today?" 

"Don't flatter yourself," Roman scoffed and held up a black journal with sparkling green trim, "You left this in the common area." 

"Did I?" he asked and righted his head with a sickening pop. He was as bad as Roman about collecting cool journals and never filling them, so it could be his, even if he didn't recognize it. Roman handed it to him and crossed his arms. 

"It would appear so. If Logan yells at me for leaving my notes lying about, he will certainly yell at me for yours." 

Remus hummed softly and ran his fingers over the cover, ignoring the jab. The trim pricked his fingers as they glided over it. It was a nice journal, but definitely not something he conjured up. He supposed it might have been a gift, but that would mean someone made something for him—someone other than Janus, and maybe just one other side, but he remembered every gift Virgil ever gave him.

"He likes to yell. Are you sure this is mine?" he questioned, still learning the rise and fall of the trim.

"I assumed, considering the design. I don't like to open other people's journals," Roman answered. Remus knew he was scared of leafing through it, probably expecting some security monster popping out the second he opened it. He didn't blame him for that one, but it stung nonetheless.

"Me neither, but now I'm curious!" Remus laughed and opened to a random page. It was all hand-written poetry. Interesting!

"It's a poetry book! Wanna hear one? It could be a hint!" Remus wiggled his eyebrows. Roman let out a short sigh but went tense. 

"I have other things to do. I came to drop off the book and now I must depart. Farewell." Roman bowed and sank out with flourish. He left far too quickly for comfort.

"Love you too, nice seeing you again, don't be a stranger," Remus pouted and went back to his room, too bummed to paint anymore. 

  He rose up and flopped on his bed with the journal open. Some angsty poetry might make him feel better. He got comfy and let his eyes traverse the page

My mouth is dry Sugary sweet and kind Choking me with my own tongue Out of everything, that saccharine isn't a lie

Remus pursed his lips. That one was really short, and with the talk of lies, he had to wonder. Was this actually Roman's? Did he want to share this with him covertly? Remus bit back a squeal at the thought and kept reading with some hope. 

Lost in translation Obstinate and selfish Get over yourself Avoidance builds pressure Never any quiet when you snap

Remus giggled, knowing exactly who that one was about! Someone pissed the author off! And he knew that that person pissed Roman off a lot! He turned the page, expecting to learn more about this author, believing they could be his brother wanting to reconnect. He was a little surprised to find a skull doodled in the corner but brushed it off.

I want to pull him from the shadows and into my heart Will he see me? Will he disappear if I reach for his hand? Am I blind and staggering in desperation? Someone like him would be better without me Someone like him deserves someone better No star deserves to succumb to a black hole

That one hurt. Remus wiped away the tears forming in his eyes. He knew that feeling all too well. The one side who made him want to obey, the side that made his heart flutter like the bats in his tummy—that side was his best friend and then he left. He missed his partner in crime and he wished that Virgil would come back, just for a visit, and spend time with him again. But that wasn't happening and he had a whole book to read about an author he could really connect with, Roman or not.

He went through several poems that were angsty and angry, full of self-loathing. With each piece he read, the more he doubted it was Roman. The language wasn't formal enough and it didn't match his style at all! It was good stuff, most of it, and Remus kind of hoped the real author would be willing to collaborate with him. He liked this guy.

Like the sun overhead, you're on fire The big man has a little golden boy Pompous and cruel with haughty desire Which one of us are you gonna destroy?

Darkness and shadow that cannot be lit Overshadowing you to make it stop Use that hubris to land another hit I'll keep fighting until the curtains drop

You think you're Hercules when you're so weak Rise like a phoenix Icarus, just try  Maybe you'll learn what it means to be meek Until that day you won't see me cry

I will rain on your parade every damn time Stopping stupidity is my worst crime

Okay so that one threw him for a loop. It would take a few minutes to piece it together. Remus decided that he could assume it was about Roman this time. Princey loved the classics and he had a pet phoenix. This author had some beef with him! Remus hoped for more anger at Roman with the next poem, because he certainly had enough pent up with the snobby, best-friend stealing, always got the spotlight prince. He didn’t get that catharsis, he got more than he bargained for.

I find comfort in breathing in his scent Even if his hands are mine for tonight If he asks, I don't know where his clothes went What I'm doing is wrong but it feels right

If I close my eyes I can taste his kiss A dream in a nightmare clouding my mind Hearing my name on his lips would be bliss To pin him down, our fingers intertwined

I long to stare into piercing jade pools So he thinks of me while I stake my claim I want him to never want to let go I always thought that love was just for fools But on his green sash, love, or something, came I almost regret that he'll never know

This was definitely not a book the author wanted to share. Remus was pretty sure that his face was going to melt off. Now he really wanted to figure out who wrote these! Someone actually liked him like that at some point! It definitely wasn't Princey in that poem—Remus still had the sash mentioned! He was just the tiniest bit turned on, but most of his hype went into his famous wiggles.

"You're so dead!" 

Remus jolted up and beamed. Virgil never stopped by anymore, so when he popped up threateningly, Remus was too happy to care or put the pieces together.

"And how do you wanna kill me? I have some suggestions!" he sang and shimmied. Virgil scowled and crossed his arms. 

"Have Janus wipe your memory and give it back." 

"What, the book?" Remus questioned and held it up. Virgil snatched it and held it to his chest protectively. Remus' eyes widened in horror.

"You wrote all that?! And I read it!? Oh no no no no no! I had no idea—I'll get Hisster Myde and scrub it away with steel wool! Dammit I am so sorry, Sca–Virgil!" Remus yelped and got up to pace. His only rule about Virgil, broken! The only rule he wanted to follow—tarnished!

"Were you about to call me 'Scabby Doo' again?" Virgil scoffed, hiding the fear and hurt he felt. 

"No, 'Scare Bear,' something kinda cute but that’s not important right now!" Remus answered, "I read your stuff without asking! I might be a crazed Camus Stranger boy, but I have some standards!" 

"Remus. Breathe. You're gonna wipe this trash from your memory and it'll be okay," Virgil tried to soothe him, only for the duke to go rigid. 

"Trash!?" Remus snarled and spun on his heels and marched up to Virgil until the lumbering emo hit the wall, confused and scared. 

"It's not trash! I know trash! I eat it for breakfast! That book holds some of the best stuff my critical creative ass has read in ages!" Remus snapped and glared up at him with a fire in his eyes. 

"What?" 

"Those poems are great! I was gonna find the author and beg on my knees like a needy subby bitch to collab with him because holy shit! I felt something with each one!" 

"Even the one with the skull doodle on the page?" Virgil squeaked, his face a beautiful shade of red. Remus smiled sadly. 

"Yeah, that one hit a little too close to home. I got all teary eyed. Thinking about it now after reading that saucy sonnet, it really hurts!" 

"I uh—" Virgil stammered, "I'm, uh, 'm sorry for the sash and the whole—"

"If you apologize for anything else I am going to lip wrestle that apology away!" Remus cut him off, "Because dammit, Virgil, I love you, even if you don't feel the same way anymore. No more self-hate and no more doubting yourself." 

"Puppy," Virgil said and finally took back some control, guiding Remus back and having him sit down, "I can't promise I'll be able to stop that completely, but if you can stand a little bit of it, I wouldn't mind making that collab a date." 

"Really!?" Remus grinned making Virgil's eyeshadow turn purple, "Can we paint too? And watch scary movies? And make out? And then try and woo each other with some dark prose until one of us caves and asks the other to be his boyfriend? And then f—" 

"Yeah," Virgil cut him off and pressed a finger to Remus' lips, "Except for the part about caving. Will you–I mean, only if you want to, would you–and it’s cool if you say ‘no’ since things might be a little weird but—”

“Band-aid, Emoraptor!” Remus cut him off, like he used to do back in the day when Virgil started down one of his nervous tangents.

“Maybe be my boyfriend now?" Virgil said quickly and winced.

"Yes!" Remus cheered and dragged Virgil into a hug, tumbling on the sheets, "Loom over me like a cypress tree and stay with me until I taste death for a night." 

"Stay here and cuddle until we pass out like touch starved gremlins? Only if you visit me in the abyss until this world calls," Virge mused and wrapped his arms around the duke, curling around him protectively. 

"And then the next," Remus hummed softly and kissed his hand, “But you’re always in my dreams!” Virgil buried his face in Remus’ neck and smiled against his skin. Who would have thought that they would wind up here?

Roman sat on his bed and stared at the collage of pictures he had on the wall. In the very center was an old drawing of him and Remus in front of a castle. He sighed wistfully and stared at it, admiring Remus' work. He hoped that sneaking into Virgil's room was worth it—he wanted Remus to be happy even if he couldn't provide that joy. Maybe one day he’d be able to, but until then, he hoped he got his best friend and brother together to make some amends if not more.

[vegetalass]

I know you're not around much these days but if you ever decide to make a come back, I dont suppose youd do some HC about the rdr2 guys and times theyve got caught mastyrbating around camp? I love your thoughts so much they're hilarious and cute ☺👉👈

This ask is very sweet and I like the idea so I will do it... thanks for your kind words and making me smile, anon!!🥺❤️😘

Find me at @ihatebnha

Hope you enjoy!! 

-

Arthur 

Used to get caught a lot more than he does now

Because of such, Dutch and Hosea don’t really care on the rare occasion they do catch him just because it was pretty common when he was younger

They laugh about it between themselves 

And when caught, Arthur just pretends it didn’t happen

He’s like, “I don’t touch myself, Jesus, who do you think I am?” 

Or if John jokingly is like, “Saw you the other day, what were you thinking about?” Arthur just plays stupid

Stuff like “See me where?” or “See me what?” 

And if the subject is pushed it turns into fighting (Arthur saying that John isn’t much better)

Arthur thanks the lord every day that Micah has never caught him in the act because he knows he’d never be able to live it down

And if a girl caught him… he’d probably never be able to look them in the eyes again

Probably jacks off being going to sleep or if he’s alone at camp

John 

He has a lot less shame about masturbating, but he’s definitely even more private about the subject than Arthur 

He doesn’t really deny it, but he definitely pulls a “You didn’t see shit!!” Even if the person very obviously DID

Also probably gets caught more than not… It’s just at this point, people have stopped commenting on it 

Dutch definitely jokingly plays the “Poor Abigail…” card all the time

It makes John (and Abigail) sooooooooo mad 

Honestly, I feel like when people catch him, he yells at them but doesn’t bother to stop

Thinks it’s their fault and not his because it was OBVIOUS what he was doing and they still didn’t bother to check or knock

This has caused fights with almost everyone

It’s a “what did you expect” type moment

The only time he’d ever apologize to is if it’s you or another girl who catches him, and even then he would probably never want to see you again out of embarrassment 

Hence why John probably just leaves camp and finds a secluded area to jerk off now(good luck to those who wander away from the fire) 

Charles 

We love Charles because he just jerks it when he’s bathing in a river or something 

Out of everyone, he’s the least likely to get caught, and on the rare occasion that he is, is also the most willing to laugh it off 

I feel like this is because he’s the one who accidentally catches other people so he knows it’s not a big deal

He’s so quiet no one knows he’s there until it’s too late

Gets called a peeper because of this… even though Charles doesn’t want to catch people any more than they want to be caught 

If a girl caught him, he’d try to hide himself before approaching them later to formally apologize 

It’s kinda weird… Just be like Arthur and pretend it didn’t happen babe!! 

If Dutch or Micah ever caught him doodling it, they’d never let it go and tease him until wit’s end

“So Charles is human after all!” is the type of shit they’d say and he’d literally want to pass away

Dutch, Molly hasn’t had one single orgasm the entire time she’s been with you so BE QUIET

Most likely to masturbate when he’s bathing or when he’s away from camp and alone on missions

Micah

Everybody at camp has to pray that they don’t catch Micah masturbating

He has no shame and does not care what people see 

He’s the “What? I have needs!” and “You do it, too!” guy... which honestly, isn’t even bad logic

It’s just when people actually walk in on him he doesn’t really seem bothered… which is kinda freaky

If it’s you or heaven forbid, another girl, he says “Quit staring, either help a man out or leave”

And if it’s Arthur or anyone else, “I knew you were a nasty bastard”

Like… Micah… you’re the one who isn’t ashamed!!! 

Too bold for his own good and eventually Dutch probably has to get involved 

They have one of those “man to man” talks where Dutch is like “Micah… You know… Men… We keep our business in private…”

Everyone at camp pretends they’re not eavesdropping on the conversation

It’s the only time Micah listens to complaints, and even though he forces himself to calm down on the lewd rudeness, he is still jacking it off whenever the urge arises

Rubs one out in his tent whenever he feels like it

Dutch

To give Dutch credit for something, he doesn’t jack off very often 

Partially because he gets down with Molly a lot, but also because he considers himself to have dignity and doesn’t want to ruin that 

The only people who’ve really caught him rubbing one out are Hosea and Arthur, and they probably let it go pretty quick after an apology

Most because Dutch is pretty polite about it 

“A man’s business is a man’s business” or some BS like that 

So when he does masturbate, it’s a calculated and timed move that he makes when he’s pretty sure no one is around

Also willing to laugh it off when he catches someone else masturbating, mostly because he raised two teenage boys, so in a way, he’s used to seeing it on the daily

God forbid is another girl catches him, though, because he’d also pull them aside to apologize

LET IT GO, KING!!! 

Jerks off only when he’s desperate and camp is empty

Kieran

King of bad luck 

I can see him with a pretty low libido, but probably gets caught making juice the first time he tries it at camp

He was lucky it was just Charles who saw, who thankfully, didn’t say anything about it

But still, it scares the absolute crap out of him and his desire to jack off gets even lower than it was already 

Probably stupidly thinks that masturbating is dirty or a sin or something that somebody told him when he was a boy

And if a girl ever caught him, even if they didn’t realize what was happening, he’d just have a heart attack and die

Like he’d literally pack up his stuff and go

Everyone at camp: We’ve all seen Micah twisting it so we don’t care

Kieran: UHHHHH 

Also gets teased by Micah and Dutch for it, except their comments are like “Aw, don’t be shy, be a man!” or “I’m sure you’ll find yourself a woman one day…”

Again, Kieran just passes away

Jerks off when he’s alone with the horses in a field and no one is around

Javier 

Hasn’t been caught yet despite the fact that everyone knows he jacks off ALL THE TIME

Kinda proud of himself for this fact, too 

If it’s the middle of the day and he’s in his tent, he’s busy

Usually can his volume to a minimum, but if he knows no one is around, he doesn’t mind letting it out 

Charles, of course, hears it the one time he’s not on a team mission

He’d definitely not going to stop is someone catches him, but he has the decency to cover himself up

Especially if it’s a lady

We like him because he’s not going to acknowledge it happened later but he will apologize in the moment 

Says some shit like, “Sorry, princess…” jdsfhksd

If another guy tries to tease him for it, he’ll take it in stride and just tease back 

Especially because he knows he’s not as bad as Micah or John who get caught ALL THE TIME 

Prefers to rub one out before bed but he’s not really picky as long as it’s in his tent and he has a way to clean up

Sean 

Everyone’s had a run in with Sean when his dick’s been out 

It’s practically a camp joke that everyone has a story about it

He’s another guy who jacks off when bathing in the river, except he’s:

1. Not secretive about it

2. Bathes all the time

Sean leaves the water hole and everyone knows that they shouldn’t go back in there until the water is washed away 

Pretty vocal, too, so you always sorta know when you should avoid certain areas

The only time he’s ever embarrassed is when a girl catches him

Turns bright red, starts stuttering, looking for anything to cover himself up with while apologizing

That being said, he only feels bad because he feels like he ruined his chances of being friendly with them

Gets teased by the other boys for it but enjoys the attention, plus loves teasing right back

“Oh hush you, you love looking at me,” type stuff 

He’s a lil nasty but he keeps it fun and fresh 

Jacks off before bathing, and sometimes in his tent if he’s desperate or is already clean. 

[minjoonie-song]

0:00 “Hello! Welcome to Minjoon’s Kitchen.” “Who’s fucking kitchen?” Brandon’s voice off camera startled a laugh out of Minjoon, loud and squeaky; and that was it for the theme of the live. “Welcome to uh... Welcome to Minjoon in a kitchen.” “Welcome to not Minjoon’s Kitchen.” Brandon added, finally coming into view. “Welcome not Minjoon to Minjoon’s Kitchen, not in Minjoon’s kitchen.” “Featuring Minjoon.” “Welcome to Brandon’s kitchen!” “Welcome to Brandon is trying to get his car home because she’s parked in fucking central LA after we went for brunch and had so many mimosas that I legally wasn’t allowed to drive us home.” “Hi MTV. Welcome to Brandon’s crib.” “Look mom! I‘m on MTV and I didn’t have to be 16 and pregnant to do it!” The pair started cackling again, uncontrollably hysterical in their inebriated states. 8:14

“You should make that a thing.” ”What?” ”Not Minjoon’s Kitchen. Once a month you just show up at a random fans house, streaming and giving them no time to prepare for you to cook whatever they have in their house.” ”Absolutely not. You know I like to be organised when cooking.” ”You’re literally squinting at lettuce in the fridge, I think you’re past that.” ”That’s lettuce?” “Oh my god, Minjoon. You can’t cook like this.” “I can’t see properly. I don’t know where my glasses are.” “This is going to be the most disappointing episode of your show ever and it’s live. We can’t cook, it’s gonna be dangerous and messy.” “In the words of the awesome Jake Peralta. Title of your sex tape.” “Oh my god. No, mine would be called uhh.. Put that thing back where it came from or so help me.” “Nope. I already claimed that for mine.” “Joonie! I hate the accuracy.” The laughing continued, even as the pair complained that they couldn’t breathe.

18:58

After they’d finally calmed down they took the camera with them to the couch, after the executive decision that the pair were definitely in no state to try to actually cook anything and a too large order of pizza. “We have like half an hour to kill. What are we going to do now?” “Remember when I asked for a Q&A way back in the past when I thought I’d be sober at four in the afternoon? We’ll do that and then I guess I’m writing a formal apology on my notes app to anyone who was hungry and eager to learn. Just like a real celebrity.” Minjoon fished around in his pockets for his phone, handing it to Brandon once it was unlocked so he could read it aloud. “I just figured out the greeting. Welcome to the last ever episode of Minjoon’s Kitchen.” “My biggest mistake this time was too much Minjoon and not enough kitchen. Some people come just to see my organised spice rack.” “You’ve both upgraded and downgraded to Brandon’s Couch.” “Love it. I’ve re-branded. Put it on a T-shirt. Every episode I’m just going to show you how to order different pizzas. We’re a podcast now.” “You’re a dumbass. Alright! Let’s see what we got. Minjoon.. What is your favorite thing to cook?”  “Everyone I see with how hot I am.” The laughter started up once more, even despite their previous attempts to calm down. “I fucking told you! I knew you’d get that one.” “You owe me $50 for saying it!” “I’ll buy all the pizza you just ordered, how about that?” “Catch me outside?” “Stop! How have you made it this far in life as a meme?” “I wasn’t always like this, it’s part of my rebrand. Brandon’s Couch: Meme edition.” “I can’t believe we failed cooking and now we’re already failing the Q&A.” “No! No, I got this. My favourite thing at the moment.. I love making risotto. Mostly because I get to eat it afterwards and I love eating risotto but yeah! That’s my favourite right now.” “I don’t think that’s really answering.” “It’s my answer. This is still not Minjoon’s Kitchen featuring Minjoon for this last episode. Shh. Next question!” “This one asks if there is anything in particular that gets me inspired for designs? Yes! I love art so as soon as my bank account hits below a mil, I’m like.. Shit! Gotta doodle. No, I find inspiration everywhere. Sometimes it’s just a particular mood I’m in, sometimes I’ll see a net curtain blowing a particular way in a breeze and design an entire dress from how it falls. Sometimes I’ll see a colour that I’ll want to make an entire wardrobe out of. I’ve been painting a lot recently, not designs just.. things I like and I’ve been able to work from those. Gross, I know but yeah. Inspiration is everywhere. Disgusting. Unacceptable. I refuse to be inspired again that was too mushy.”

23:37

The boys were a giggly mess. Almost everything bringing them to hysterics even if it was just something said with the smallest hint of sarcasm, they were grabbing onto the couch and each other’s arms for support as they hiccuped their way through another bout of laughter. “Anyway! Next question is top 5 celebrity chefs. Mine of course is Joonbug and that’s it. Wait, no that dude from that thing we saw in England. Gordon’s friend.” “Oh! With the road trip?” “Yeah, the really funny one.” “I loved that. Mine is obviously Chef Ramsay, Remy.. Gotta give my boy a shout out. Chef Baek Jong-won. Oh! The um.. I discovered that dude during fashion week in London that time. The sciencey one. Hus.. Hes..? I don’t remember his actual name but he made some amazing things. I was in awe. I’m also throwing in whoever invented bulgogi. That’s my top five. I actually met Chef Ramsay recently!” “You did! You called me after. How was it meeting your hero?” “Oh, I cried. Like a big baby. Ugly sobbing and lots of I love yous in the middle of a cupcake shop.” “Classic Minjoon behaviour.” “He signed my T-shirt and I cried some more. I would have proposed through my tears but I was crying too much. Like the shaky inhale, full on breakdown kind of crying? I can’t even be embarrassed because he still talked to me.” “You’re a baby!” “I am a baby! 달콤한 아기. That’s what my eomma and momma call me and then they pinch my cheekies.” “Cute! Ooh! How does it feel.. no, fuck. That’s not.. shut your face. I can read. How does performing feel on stage versus cooking on camera? How did it feel being on stage?” “I refuse to acknowledge what that means. Stage? What stage?” “They’re talking about your big, gay musical re-enactment of your love for me.” “I wish I could use memes like in real life? Just the I do not see meme but my face. Honestly though? It’s different because I can cook. This mess obviously doesn’t count but I can edit everything I post and I know what I’m doing? I’m confident when I’m cooking. I know what I can and can’t do. Being on stage was just.. I was terrified. It was terrifying. I had fun though and I did work hard. Like.. I decided last minute and I had to learn choreo and remember lyrics to things I wrote years ago. I was scared I’d trip up and face plant the whole time. Like the entire time. I wanted to be included though and I couldn’t go to the festival because it was terrifying being around so many people. I just kind of listened from the side lines but it sounded good and you said you had lots of fun being up there.” “I did. You know me though. I’m that one line from that Mike Posner song about needing everyone’s eyes just to feel seen.” “Woah. Hashtag deep.” “Oh my god. You’re ridiculous.” “I did need the entire weekend to recover though. It’s.. it’s a lot to open yourself up like that.” “You mean serenading the town with love songs about me?” “You suck so bad.” “Is that how you talk to the former love of your life?” Minjoon snorted, slapping at Brandon’s arm. “You were so in love with me. It’s my greatest achievement, you know? I put it on my resume under my skills. Has given Minjoon boners.” The reaction was instant, Brandon’s loud laugh failing to cover Joonie’s shriek that soon turned into a laugh but even his amusement couldn’t mask how red he’d gotten. “No! I hate it here! You suck so bad! So bad! I can never show my face in public or make eye contact with another human being ever again!” “It’s a good job I put the age restriction thingy on this stream. I knew I’d be a fucking menace after the second drink.” “You’re not a menace! You’re a gremlin! God, end the stream before you really do end my YouTube career. Goodbye everyone! I’m gonna go eat my body weight in pizza and become a cave hermit.” “Bye little Joonie fans! Sorry about the.. Fuck it, I’m not sorry about anything. Peace out, bitches!”

[that-house]

Hey so I hit 100 followers today!

Buckle up, this is gonna be a LOOOONG post.

I quite honestly expected it (while my ego is a little smaller than my jokes make it out to be it is definitely present), I didn’t expect it to happen so fast.

It’s not an insane milestone, plenty of people have 100 followers. A hefty portion of my followers are bigger than me. But it’s still important to me. Knowing that there’s 100 people out there who enjoy my shit makes me happy.

First and foremost the credit quite honestly has to go to ahegao George Washington. No, I’m not joking. Until I posted on r/tumblr about my desire to draw that, I had 0 followers. I jumped to like 10 overnight, which was awesome. And then those new followers helped me spread my posts and get more attention.

Secondly I’d like to shoutout @imaverysadgirl and @themeaninglessjumble. You two were my first real tumblr frens. You were the first of my followers to really interact with me. Ember, I’m super happy you’re alive to see me hit 100 followers. Jumble (I don’t know your name unless I forgot it), your art and creations are great and you deserve way more attention.

To all the rest of you, you guys are great, too. Every new follower makes me happy. I’d say I don’t deserve you all, but my colossal ego says I do. Regardless, being nemesi and getting called out for being horny on main and sending and receiving asks has made this last month or so great.

Finally, for all the shit it gets, and for all the shit it pulls, [tumblr] really is pretty dope. I got to meet you all, and it’s actively making me a better person by exposing me to groups of people I’d rarely interact with in real life.

Why does it feel like I’m saying goodbye? I’m not, don’t worry. I plan to stay, and neither death nor pain shall drive me from this hellsite. I’m just saying thanks.

Now with the thanks out of the way, I want to talk about myself a little. Just the stuff that I’ve always wanted to say and never quite gathered my thoughts and found the time to talk about.

You’re gonna get to know me so well! This is like a mini autobiography!

First off, my mental health. This is something I don’t talk about much on this blog, mostly because it doesn’t need much talking about. I’m doing pretty well, to be honest. I have a smattering of anxiety and I’m maybe a little too introverted for my own good, but I’m not suffering from depression and the only time I ever even remotely considered suicide was when I just really really didn’t want to go to French class. COVID has been great for me, since I don’t have to see people. I suppose I’m not a great person to talk to if you’re struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, seeing as I can’t personally relate, but I’m still always here for you guys if you need me. Just because I haven’t lived through your experiences doesn’t mean I can’t try to help.

Next up I want to talk about my sexuality. This one’s a bit of a mystery. For the past 16 years of my life I’ve considered myself 100% straight. But lately (let’s be honest, following the release of Spirit Blossom Thresh) I’ve been wondering if I might be bi. How many times can I joke about wanting to smash sexy boys before it’s not really a joke anymore? And if I am, a lot of things would suddenly make a lot of sense. But every time I think I have it figured out it suddenly feels like I have no clue what’s going on. Regardless, my sexuality has honestly never been a massive part of my identity (though I’m definitely not asexual, my friends can attest I’m far too horny for that). I have no clue if I’m bi and for now it’s kind of a fun little adventure!

I guess I’ll talk about school and stuff now. Believe it or not, I’m kinda smart. I’m taking a shitton of AP courses this year. But I simultaneously feel like it’s too much and not enough. I’m smart, but I’m not a great student. Compared to my dad, who graduated college with a 3.98 GPA (and his only B being in History of Canada as an American) and now has a super well-paying government STEM job that he loves, I feel like even if I work my ass off I’ll never quite measure up. And my parents have had super high expectations of me, and it’s only recently that they’ve started to accept that I might get some B’s here and there. I’m worried about all the homework this year. I’m a year ahead in Math but I don’t feel good enough at math to be taking AP calculus junior year. I’m worried I’m going to get like a C. But for the most part school is alright, too. That’s sort of the trend in my life. Everything’s alright.

Time to talk about my love life! I have no love life! I’ve been single for 17 years and probably stand no chance of changing that until at least college! Haha I’m so alone! But I can live with it. Growing up an only child with a few friends means that I’m pretty good at functioning without a ton of social interaction, and, while I’d like a partner someday, I’m not desperate. I can wait until I find someone. Pretty much my goal is not to die alone.

Onto sports maybe? I played soccer for most of my life, and was always the worst player on the select team. I was too good for the normal team and not good enough for the select team (kinda like math). Soccer was really toxic, especially when you’re the worst player on a team of high school jock drug addict boys. So I quit, and started playing frisbee! It’s a lot better. The people are nicer! But my first season never happened because of COVID and now I’m in my Junior year and haven’t played much frisbee! So I kinda suck! But I’m physically fit and that’s good enough for me! On my own time I bike and run to stay in shape.

Are you still with me? Now I’m gonna talk about my hobbies and things!

I’ve been playing video games for a long time. I kinda suck at them to be totally honest. I probably have below-average reaction time, and my parents only let me play 15 minutes a day for most of my childhood, so I have a lot less practice than most of my friends. I’m pretty slick with Swain in LoL tho.

This next part is borderline shameless self-promotion, but since the Kickstarter isn’t live yet I guess it doesn’t count. I’m making a tabletop role playing game! I’ve been working on it for the past few years. My goal is to launch the Kickstarter prior to my college applications, because that’ll look sexy as fuck to potential colleges. It’s a post-apocalyptic sci-fi game where you play as supersoldiers trying to reconquer the wastelands of Earth for humanity. I’ll do a big post on it when I launch the Kickstarter, and I guess that’ll also be a full name reveal (kinda spooky since my full name is ENTIRELY unique and one-of-a-kind. More ego boost lmao).

And finally I want to talk about my art and writing. I’ll start with my drawing, and finish off with my writing, since that’s what I’d most like to be known for on here (but that’ll never happen because my caveman brain shitposts are too funny).

So I’ve been doodling for a long time. I briefly got formal art training but sacrificing my Saturday mornings to draw what someone else wanted me to make so that I could make better stuff in the future didn’t appeal to my 8-year-old brain. I draw in the margins of worksheets. I draw on random sheets of paper. Recently my parents bought me a drawing tablet, and I’ve been trying to improve at digital art. I’d say I’m getting better, but I don’t practice nearly enough. All in all my art serves its purpose. It makes people laugh and can sometimes creep people out. It’ll never go in a museum, and I’ll never make money off of it but whatever.

And finally, my writing.

How can I talk about writing without talking about reading? I’ve likely read more books than both my parents combined, and if not, it’s close (and my mom is a prolific reader too). I have three bookshelves in my room and books on every surface. You can’t follow me for long without seeing a post ranting about my latest read. I love to read and I read incredibly fast. Reading spurred my love of English class, which in turn helped me write.

And finally, we get to writing in and of itself. I’ve been writing stories since I was a little kid. I’d like to think I’ve improved a fair bit. I’m still no novelist, but I consider myself a fairly adept short story writer.

But I suppose where my writing really stems from is my bed. Every night while I’m lying in bed, I tell myself stories until I fall asleep. I work on a story until it’s done or until I get bored of it. Along the way, in the shower, on my bike, I build the world of the story, crafting the plot. Sometimes the stories are elaborate fanfictions of my latest reads. That’s probably how they started. Often, they’re unique worlds all of their own. My current writing posts are about the City of Mammon, but my current story in my head is about some vampires who hunt other vampires in Victorian England.

And now we get into the process of writing. It’s fun! I sit myself down with an idea in my head, and use all the fancy words I picked up from my books to convey the vibes I want. I honestly wouldn’t be a great writing teacher. It’s just a skill that comes naturally to me as a result of what I’ve been doing with my free time my whole life. And it’s beautiful. And every time someone compliments my writing or reblogs it, I love writing just a little bit more.

Well I guess this is it. The 100 follower special. I wonder how many of you guys will take the time out of your day to read this. Hopefully a lot!

James (or That House) signing off for the night!

<3 thanks guys

[sunriseverse]

As Hermann walks towards him, Newt starts to panic. How is he supposed to act around him? Should he get up to greet him? Should he hug him? A handshake? No, too formal. A wave? Definitely not. A fist bump? If he wanted to look like an idiot. He rubs his sweaty palms on his pants and keeps dread-filled eyes on Hermann. Is this seriously their relationship now? Newt hated feeling like a lovesick teen when he actually was one, it’s a million times worse now that he’s supposed to have grown out ofit

ohhhh this was such a fun prompt 

The Drift reveals everything; that's what they tell you. Newt never really believed it, honestly—it sounded, well, like bullshit.

But.

Well.

He wasn't really expecting for them to get thrown right into his memory of their first meeting.

It's autumn; the sun shines in through the windows of the café softly, and outside, the trees are turning red. Newt's waiting in a booth for Hermann.

They've decided to meet in person; Newt is in the city for a conference, and Hermann lives here, so, it makes perfect sense. They both want to meet.

It's five minutes until the agreed upon time, and Newt's chewed his fingernails to stubs already, and his hands are hot. He's seen a photo of Hermann before, sure, but that's not the same thing as actually meeting in person. There's a lot more at stake here.

Finally, he catches sight of him; tall and lanky, threading his way through the cafe, cane held in one hand.

As Hermann walks towards him, Newt starts to panic.

How is he supposed to act around him? Should he hug him? A handshake? No, too formal. A wave? Definitely not. A fist bump? If he wanted to look like an idiot.

Paralysed with indecision, Newt does nothing; and Hermann sits across from him, smiling awkwardly. "Newton," he greets.

Holy shit your voice is hot, Newt thinks, and then, oh my god you dress like a grandpa, that's so fucking cute which, in peak Geiszlerian fashion, comes out as "Oh my god you dress like a grandpa, holy shit."

Needless to say, things go downhill from there, leaving Newt heartbroken and guilty in a tiny café in Berlin.

Hermann tries to ask him about it, afterwards, but Newt skilfully avoids the question, and then basically runs off to hide in his rooms for as long as possible.

Newt isn't an idiot; he knows that he's not going to be able to avoid Hermann forever. Really, he shouldn't be avoiding Hermann at all—the dude was literally in his head less than six days ago, and Drift partners are supposed to, like, communicate and shit.

Newt is...not really keen on that? Like, at all, frankly. 

It all started—well, technically, it all started like, thirty-three years ago, when his mom decided to leave him with his dad and Illia and go back to her career as an opera singer in Berlin rather than hang around as a kid, and the ensuing abandonment has kept with him throughout his life. But. Like. That's not when this specific "it" started.

No, this it started when, at age twenty-three, Newt started writing to one Hermann Gottlieb, then sans PhD, and fell sort of, kind of, madly head over heels in academic and intellectual love with him.

He wasn't, like, a lovesick teen or anything, because, uh, he was in his early twenties, as much as lots of people often assumed that he wasn't, but there may have been a few instances of doodling Doctor Newton Gottlieb in the backs of some of his notebooks. Once or twice. Maybe three times.

The point is, he has, like. A good reason for wanting to avoid Hermann right now after having basically bared his soul to him. A selfish reason, maybe, but a good one. 

Maybe it's a bit of an overreaction to bolt just about the instant he feels Hermann coming near—ghost Drift is handy like that—but he really prefers it to the alternative option, which is running into Herman and having to Talk.

Yes, it deserves the capital t. It's not a talk, it's a Talk.

However, he does have to get work done, which means going back to the lab—he's been putting off filing reports and shit since the Drift with Hermann, because he sort of keeps all of his stuff in the lab, and being in the lab means running a high risk of running into Hermann, and,  yeah, no.

But he's going to have to chance it, today, because he's just turned on his phone to find this lovely situation: two missed calls from Herc, who's the acting Marshal, as well as multiple voicemails, four texts, an email, and another text, this one from Tendo, telling him to, quote, get your ass in gear and file those reports before Herc starts complaining to me even more than he already is.

Newt sighs, and unlocks his phone; texts a quick, i'll get on that to Herc, an apology to Tendo, who really does deserve better, and then uncurls himself from the half-foetal position he's curled himself into in the night, half because it's fucking freezing even with the thick blanket he's got and half because it lowkey tricks his exhausted mind into thinking that there's someone in bed besides just him.

Anyway.

He pulls on his clothes and gives himself a cursory once-over in the bathroom mirror, dragging a hand through his hair to try and get rid of the bedhead—or, at least, tame it so that it looks artful—, and heads on down the halls, crossing his fingers and hoping he won't run into Hermann.

"Oh, sweet," he says, with just one corner left to turn before he's in the lab, "no He—"

And then he turns the corner and sees Hermann, for the first time, in almost a week.

He's bent over something at his desk, and hasn't noticed Newt, which Newt is glad for, and then promptly fucking ruins by tripping over a box of Hermann's chalk he squirrelled away on his side a few months back and then left laying out in the middle of the walkway and letting out a sharp yelp before he catches himself; but it's too late and Hermann's already looked up and spotted him.

"Newton," he says, and rises; and Newt gets a terrible, horrible, awful de ja vu moment. "You've been avoiding me."

It's a statement; given in an even tone; and, if Newt didn't know him any better, he'd think that Hermann was just...saying it, but he does, so he can see the little twitch of his lip, the way his eyes are slightly narrowed. He's...he's upset about it.

Newt swallows. "Uh, funny story," he says. "I was. Sick. With the flu. Gotta, um. Gotta stay in my room, um—"

"Don't bullshit me, Newton," Hermann snaps; and closes the distance between them rapidly. He's quick little fucker when he wants to be—Newt always forgets that. Unfortunately, it leaves him to try and backpedal away, which winds up with his back hitting the wall. Hermann's still talking, still advancing. "I saw inside your head, Newton, you cannot—you cannot, don't you, don't you dare pretend that I didn't."

Newt bites his lip; gives up on trying to act like he doesn't know what Hermann is talking about. "Look, dude, can we just—not? Like, this is, um. Kind of embarrassing for me. I'd really rather we just forget all about it, okay—?"

"What if I don't want to?" Hermann interrupts, and he's only a pace or so away from Newt. 

Newt blinks. "What."

"What if I don't want to forget all about it," Hermann repeats. "I—Newton, what I saw in your head...I don't want to forget that. It...to have confirmation...to know that my, my—regard for you, that it wasn't, isn't one-sided...I don't want to forget that, Newton."

"What," Newt says, again; his brain trying desperately to understand what Hermann's saying and kind of stalling on it.

Hermann swallows; eyes fluttering shut, for a brief moment; lashes thick and dark against his pale skin. When he opens them, his face is more unguarded than Newt's seen in—well, ever.

"I...I was upset that you were avoiding me," Hermann says, "because I wanted to talk about it. Because I...I wanted to tell you that I felt the same, Newton."

"...holy shit," Newt whispers, eyes wide. "Um. Holy shit."

"Yes, well—"

"Can I kiss you?" Newt interrupts. "I mean—like, um. We should talk about it, obviously, but you kind of just told me you like me back so. Can I kiss you?"

"...alright," Hermann says, and Newt pushes away from the wall, stands on his tip-toes, and presses a—first!—kiss to Hermann's lips. When Newt pulls away, Hermann says, "I'm still upset that you were avoiding me."

Newt shrugs. "I don't blame you," he says. "Um. Taking a stab at being like, a functional and responsible adult here—do you want to grab something to eat and go sit on the sofa and talk it out? I haven't had breakfast yet, but I've got a few sandwiches in the fridge."

Hermann's nose wrinkles. "You keep specimens in there," he says.

"Yeah, and I keep the food in sealed containers," Newt says, rolling his eyes. "So—waddaya say?"

"...for once, your proposal is...rational," Hermann says. Newt grins and makes towards the fridge.

[kierongillen]

Writer Notes: The Wicked + the Divine 40

Spoilers, obv.

The first issue of "Okay." I've known for quite some time that it was likely the final arc would use the word "Okay" in some way. The unpacking phrase "It's going to be okay" has been a backbone of the series. Due to the first year on the book, that's been a loaded phrase, all the way through.

But when signing a first volume of the book, I've added the dedication "It's going to be okay." There's lots to unpack in that, and I suspect I'll wait until later in this arc to say any more. But knowing that eventually we'd like have an arc called "Okay" was definitely part of doing it.

The quotation marks are key. It's a move I've done a few times in my career, in terms of showing it's a story that wants to highlight something, and raise awareness that the word should be approached with conscious consideration. This is a choice. I want you to know it's a choice. Let's talk about what that actually means anyway, right?

It's a technique I first lifted from Bowie's "Heroes". Which, of course, is doubly appropriate to use it at the end of WicDiv.

We knew they'd be a gap between the end of Mothering Invention and the start of this. The remaining five issues of the arc were tightly plotted, but in the document, this is the one which I left a lot open. I knew what I wanted to be, and it was a chance of finding an execution to make it work. It was a last chance to do a big concept issue.

(Which isn't to say there isn't conceptual stuff elsewhere in the arc. There just isn't a whole issue of it.)

This is something that I've been trying to do since issue 6. As in, a purely fan-centric issue of mainly talking heads. Every time, it's had to be cut for space. The talking heads shots of realistic footage, showing a lot of fans views on the matter. You get ghosts of it – any time Beth turns up, you get some, basically, but all of those moments could have been issues in another version of WicDiv.

(The one we won't be doing is the whole issue of literal talking heads. As in, Tara, Lucifer and Inanna just telling stories. That's fun, but we just don't have the time, and when I realised I had to stop them talking, it was definitely out. Oh, Minerva. You spoil everything.)

Equally, WicDiv's a book with two poles – the modern fan pop cultural part and the mythological grandeur. We swing one way or another, and it's easy for the latter to mug the former. I suspect that's because that's the easier stuff. Especially as Laura has gone down her hole, she's been incapable of seeing the good parts of fandom. An issue of that before the end, seemed necessary.

(Equally, with where it goes. Like, we start with Laura as a fan, and end with her on stage, saving people. The Bowie Saved More People Than Batman of WicDiv. It's a book about cycles, and ever more so here.)

So! The other side is this apocalyptic final scheme, and give a perspective on that – the necessary plot. Equally, keeping Laura off stage as long as possible.

So we end up with this.

I knew wanting to pick up and run with minor characters in WicDiv was something I wanted to do, and merging it with a disaster rapidly led to something else – this is clearly an inverted Watchmen 11. There, they gather the supporting cast together in the b-plot and then with a I-did-it-35-minutes-ago kill them all. We flip that. We imply everyone we're watching is dead, reintroduce the whole cast and then have Laura save them.

Suffice to say, formally, this was tricky.

Jamie and Matt's cover:

Meet Tom. We surveyed the whole supporting cast and picked someone who was present enough in a scene to be likely to be remembered but minor enough to be a surprise. In the end, there were less options... and the kid who asks Persephone about what to call her obviously has some strong thematic elements. She told him something. What did he make of it? It also gave a supporting cast of friends.

It's fun doing a cover like this and people going "who the hell is he?"

I wish he wasn't white and male – if I realised I was definitely going to use him in issue 24, I'd have likely have suggested otherwise. But, on the other hand, there is a point that white male guys should have heroes who aren't white male guys. So maybe I'm okay with it. Comics!

Claire Roe's Cover Well, this is monstrous. You do get the image of Minerva, like she's in Home Alone, trying to smuggle skulls. Just some great images here.

Ray Fawkes' Cover

For the Heroes Inititative Charity. The theme was "Giving" which immediately jumped to a "Lucifer giving an apple." Giving is very loaded for us. Ray is amazing – he's been an incredible support throughout all of WicDiv, and we love him. Go buy his books. My favourite is THE PEOPLE INSIDE, but for something more genre, the UNDERWINTER books are fascinating, horror. UNDERWINTER: SYMPHONY is the adult gothic sister of Wicdiv, if you squint.

IFC

Flipping "Ascended Fangirl" into "Descended God" was sitting in the script for this issue before anything else.

Page 3

Black page with white text is something that's come to the fore in the last year of WicDiv. In here, the exact word choice was key. While this feels like a documentary in terms of how it arranges information, the text doesn't tell you that. It tells you it's just footage. This means that it's not necessarily an in-world document.

Page 4-5

Working out the exact panel dimensions was a nightmare, and led to a couple of rewrites to move some pages from eight panel to a more accurate six panel. You can also see Jamie start to wrestle with the unique horror of drawing stuff that is slightly distorted, choosing angles which are less traditionally interesting and so on.

Unboxing videos are a fascinating phenomena. It's fun to see culture happen which I fundamentally don't get on an emotional level. That's what culture should throwing up.

The details on the ticket do make me smile, in an awful way.

Yes, the "change the orientation" panel is clearly us showing off. This is the sort of issue I did a lot of doodles for. It also led to a bunch of lettering challenges for Clayton, in working out whether to put balloon tails off-camera to signify the other speaker. In the end, Clayton talked us into the other approach, noting it worked fine in Mister Miracle. Hey, if Tom King does it, I guess it's fine with us.

It's worth noting the way the off-panel speaker is orientated, to ensure you know who they are. See the "Tom" in the dialogue in the second panel, to ensure you know it's Nathan.

"The front row if it kills us" is very us. This issue is a mix of awful tension and strokes of equally awful gallows humour. His smile is also adorable.

Page 6

Sometimes the most beautiful thing in the world is a page of exposition via the medium of power-point. We're all big fans of the 1960s kirby superhero maps, and this is kind of the same thing.

Page 7

This is also a masterclass in a "Naturalism is hard" sort of page layout. The choice of the greys by Matt is really nice too.

Page 8

And back with Tom and friends. Worth noting the planning on this issue – I had this list of scenes, and tried to work how much I can cut between them to create a rhythm, which obviously accelerates the further we go in.

"Shitting them whole"? Nathan is totally right. Tom, you re NASTY.

Trying to get a subplot which fit in the space for them is key. Like, friends navigating a space. That Tom and Nathan are both far from perfect in this is also important. I just realised this is totally an alt-dimension Kohl and Kid-with-knife scene.

Page 9

The greatest tragedy of WicDiv is we never got around to doing the WicDiv calendar with all the dates on. Will we get around to it for Christmas 2019? IT COULD BE POSSIBLE.

The problem in terms of story here is getting the multiple lies – Woden doesn't know what Baal has had him to do, and Baal doesn't know what Minerva is making him do. So trying to set that information up so is clear, while also in a naturalistic fashion is a trick.

We were having LOC CAPs on some of this footage, but decided to cut them all. Only some of them had it, and having it on them all would create a mess. This is the one I regret though – there's one tiny bit of information I'd like to have got in here. C'est la vie.

The colour banding on this is fascinating – the late night recording. Also, Jamie's burn on the calendar is golden.

Page 10

This was another one where the lines were worked hard. What happens BEFORE the image, what happens AFTER the image and all that.

Anyway, some good thinking here Tom.

The chat between the two, in terms of fans-beliefs and minor pieces, and hot takes and their own beliefs. Also re-introducing certain takes.

Page 11

This page is hard. The silent third panel is amazing – what Jamie does with the panning between the two. The caption would have revealed who's filming it – the Sister – but that isn't essential information.

"You soppy twat" is something I'm oddly pleased with getting in. It's a very naturalistic issue, and the tenderness is very real.

There has been a tendency for people to take Baal's fight against the Great Darkness solely to save his family, and understandable why. This scene and what follows shows that no, it's not just that. He actually believes he's saving the world, because if he didn't, he certainly wouldn't fucking do this.

Page 12

And Minerva reveals her side of all this. The little callback to 1373 does make me smile.

The stylistic nature of this is key – Jamie doing the fish-eye, Matt working the blues, giving that night vision creepiness.

Page 13-14

This issue was definitely me trying to look for ways for Jamie to not just draw a million crowd-scenes. The first two is definitely me lampshading it.

In passing, this two pages is basically all of Young Avengers in sixteen panels.

The last panel is a thing of love, and definitely inspired by a Glastonbury festival, circa 1998. I'm there alone, as it was one of the infamous wet years, waiting for Nick Cave to come on the main stage. A highly high and/or drunk guy stops beside me, after pushing through the crowd. He's clearly very excited, to the level where a group of younger women start to join in and/or mock him. He is very entertaining.

Nick Cave comes on stage, doing a half-speed From Her To Eternity.

"From her."

"To."

Eternity."

Murmurs Nick.

Our new friend hasn't actually noticed and howls at the top of his lungs...

"FROM HHHHEERRRRR TOOooOOOOOOooOOOOOOoo ETERRNNITYYYY!"

...at at least twice the speed of Nick.

At which point, he's decides he wants to be further front. Turning to the people around him, he suggests we all go forward. "Yeah?" "Yeah!" the girls scream, and immediately they all form a conga and start pushing through the crowd, with him chanting "NICK CAVE ARMY COMING THRUUUUUU!"

I join in, as clearly I want to follow this journey. It leads us to the front, where I believe I stay for the rest of the night?

On the way to the front I step on the shoe of a guy who, a year or two later, invites me to storm the stage on a Saturday morning TV show. I turn it down, and then he only goes and does it anyway.

Pop music!

Anyway, that panel is for that guy, wherever he is.

Page 15

Okay, I can't hold off crowd scenes forever. Sorry Jamie, but not too sorry, as this looks amazing. Matt pushing the controls completely into the red, with the distortions going on. This is everything. It's also the panel where the conceit of watching television is lowest – the panel shape is wrong, and it's unlikely a camera would be on Baal's mum on the top of the pillar... but they are deniably so, I suspect.

I look at this page and smile. This is some comics. Nice work, us.

Page 16-17-18-19

And we're off. This is... oh, god. There were diagrams for this, in terms of working out panel flow. There's multiple routes through the two pages, which cascade together. The backbone is the "Baal" story arc, across the diagonal on both spreads.

The second panel reads across both pages – notice the orange band leading you to the right – where a talking head explains what's actually going on at the gig, and why everyone is being immersed.

When you finish this row, you get the presenter giving the context for the remaining talking heads. On the first spread, you get a talking head talking answering the question... and then placing them in the crowd. When that ideas's been set up, in the second spread we have multiple talking heads answering it, which all gather around a single group shot showing them all by each other, unknowing. And then there's Tom, and his friends, mixed in, with Tom's own answer stumbling towards his own truth, and his friends together, joined in this.

I'm getting excited here, clearly, but this is some engineered machine monstrosity, and I love how it collaborates with the reader.

This made it a nightmare for the guided view on Comixology. We contacted them in advance, offering to help a little. In the end, I wrote my suggested route, and they went with it. Moving from a non-linear sequence to a linear sequence clearly changes it somewhat, but I think it keeps a lot of the percussion. So don't blame them, blame me.

Oh – I had a list of people to possibly include in this sequence, and selected from them. There's been some impressive attempts by readers to ID everyone. Clearly, I tried to signal who they were in their dialogue a little. My personal hero is the guy from issue 19 who saw Dionysus before Baph nabbed him. You're a fucking legend too, mate.

Tweaks we did was realising it was three hetero-reading couples on the first page, which was heteronormative. We changed that to avoid it. And, yes, that's Jon's mum.

The one I wished I could get in, but lost, was the guy standing to the right of Laura in Issue one, who jizzed to Amaterasu. His line would have been something like "I hope I enjoy this one as much as that time with Amaterasu!"

This is an awful book, in many ways.

20-21

And just let the awful moment linger. Do it naturally and show it. All that rush and then this. Once more, Matt Wilson for Eisners. The hyperbright is one thing, but the flicker on the aftermath another. And the hint of the giant in there is also carefully worked – it's something we needed there, but also was a small part of it. What was important just imagining all those people dying.

22

Inevitable Total Eclipse Of The Heart reference, the go-to song for ending WicDiv dance parties.

23-24

And then, after all that, we get this moment, building towards that final image of Laura.

Honestly, this got to me when Jamie first sent it to me in a burst into tears way. You've come a long way.

I also like the idea that Laura, before heading out, looked through all her stuff and decided "Yes, Hoop ear-rings are the look for saving 20,000 people."

Next issue is out on Wednesday.

Thanks for reading.

[demyrie]

Incoming Call (Erasermight and Devu and Skype all at once)

[inspired by this amazing doodle from @pixiepunch​ and precluding twitter thread on low key jealous Aizawa who can’t speak English and might be a Little Fuckin Touchy about Devu! we’re really getting up to some shit on twitter guys it’s a fun mess and completely enabling im in love

Deets: Erasermight and dave and toshi friendship forever, set post-kamino and post-movie with heavily implied movie spoilers, rated t for implications of the nasty] 

It was about ten minutes into a long-overdue Skype chat with Toshinori that Dave even thought to look away from the ever-shining face of his old hero partner and best friend -- but when he did, he immediately saw the man in the doorway.

His jaw almost dropped, alarm bells going off in his head as he watched the man turn and stare in their direction, hunched ominously with lank black hair falling across his face. He was dressed in black with an enormous pile of fabric slung across his shoulders and what looked like a knife case strapped on the back of a utility belt.

In the foreground, Toshinori was talking, no, raving about his students and their progress and the new experience of being a teacher, something Dave sincerely wanted to share in and contribute to, but he was far too attuned to the potential of villain attacks now. Especially with the bandages criss-crossing Toshinori’s shoulder and forehead, marking a change far more permanent and dire than simple broken skin.

Dave couldn’t find the breath or words to interrupt him, but he did point. He pointed very hard, very directly, right into the camera, feeling his adrenaline spike surreally an ocean away from what he was seeing. Toshinori trailed off, blinking owlishly, and looked over his shoulder.

“Ah! Aizawa-kun,” he exclaimed happily, leaning back and firing off a string of Japanese with his name stuck in there somewhere.

Introductions? Introductions. Dave’s shoulders dropped a fraction and he breathed out. Not a villain.

Across the room, still moored in the doorway, the newcomer just raised a coffee mug to his mouth and muttered something into it. His voice was alarmingly deep. He glared at the monitor and the scarf piled around his neck gave an affronted rustle all on its own, like a snake disturbed from cold repose.

Wait. Aizawa, Dave thought suddenly. A light bulb of recognition flickered on and he reached back in his mental records, combing through everything he and Toshi hadn’t been able to discuss since I-Island. Fragments, promises to explain.

There was so much to catch up on, but he could almost swear that name belonged to --

“Ohiyo gozaimasu, Aizawa-san. O-me ni kakarete ureshi desu,” Dave called as loudly as he dared, putting on a cautious smile and angling his tablet so he could incline his head respectfully. He felt confident that it was a formal enough greeting, or just the usual fare for a hopeful introduction, even as he winced inwardly at his sticky pronunciation. It had been a while.

Not long enough, however, to merit the reaction: in the ensuing silence, the man narrowed his eyes even further, and Dave could have sworn a menacing red light star-bursted out from under his hair. Then he took a breathtakingly standoffish sip of coffee and walked off without a word.

As soon as he was out of frame, Toshi shook his head with a laugh, calling something after him about breakfast. Aizawa’s response was low and short and Toshinori turned back to the screen with a dopey smile. It was one of the happiest, easiest expressions Dave had ever seen on him, the kind he’d missed for years, and it was just from a two second exchange about breakfast.

In that moment, Dave knew his earlier wild guess was right. He felt wild pride and glee fill his chest, because it was written all over Toshinori’s face: honeymoon stage, first degree. It made the man look ten years younger and bliss looked damn good on him.

“Please forgive him,” Toshinori intoned with a hushed, doting voice Dave had plainly never heard before, inclining his frazzled head briefly. “He looks scary, but it’s morning here, and his patrol just ended. He’s had a long night.”

“I’m not going to lie, I thought he was a villain,” Dave offered dryly, righting his tablet and settling back in his chair. Toshinori snorted, shadowed eyes twinkling.

“You’re not the first and you won’t be the last. I can’t say it’s unintentional, on his part. He’s … well, he’s him.”

Toshinori looked extraordinarily pleased with that fact. Boyfriend hypothesis confirmed in triplicate.

“So, that is him,” Dave prompted with a growing smile, giving a stifled little gesture in the direction the nocturnal hero had disappeared. He kept his voice low, even though Toshi assured him weeks earlier that “Aizawa-kun” didn't speak English.

Just courtesy, he thought, if such a thing was applicable to gossiping. His smile widened.

“That's your…”

He trailed off expectantly, having maxed out his limited intel on his best friend’s dramatic new life as a hero instructor. For a moment, there was nothing but silence above the distant buzz of his tablet screen. Toshinori delicately tucked his bangs behind his ears, a nervous gesture that swarmed Dave with memories of glancing between themselves during exams.

“If you want a word for what we are,” Toshi murmured, gaze pinned on his knees. He looked sheepish, but pleased. “I'm, ah ... afraid I don't have one.”

“Oh. Okay.”

Dave’s expectations recalibrate in real time, factoring in the retired hero’s shyness and their time apart and the language gap itself. Interesting, but not unexpected. So Dave tried his best to be reassuring, or just light. He lifted his brows and thumbed his chin with pointed thoughtfulness, putting on his best lecturing voice as if walking through a problem and the most likely solutions.

“Well, let’s see. He's … in your house. Do you want him in your house? Because I was a little worried that you didn’t.”

“Oh! Very much,” Toshi assured him with a startled laugh, waving his remaining free hand. “Yes, we … he stays here sometimes.”

The look on his friend’s face was a peculiar combination of terrified yearning and embarrassment, as if he both relished it and wanted more in the same breath. Incredible. Dave couldn’t hide his grin anymore. It was hurting his cheeks.

Who ever thought he would see the Symbol of Peace squirming in his seat with a crush?

“Are there any specific rooms you want him in?” he said as evenly as he could, trying not to snicker. Toshinori’s flustered smile fell away, brow knitting as he tried to parse the joke beyond its literal translation, then barked a laugh. The laugh tumbled into a cough and he reached off-screen for something.

“Dave!” he scolded over the wad of his handkerchief, eyes twinkling again. Dave shrugged grandly, spinning around in his chair.

“I'm just saying, I hope one of them is the bedroom.”

He watched with glee as Toshinori turned red and sputtered, shocked he would press the joke beyond subtext -- because Americans, right? He waved his hand placatingly, knowing how little teasing Toshinori could actually take, as he leaned forward and finished:

“Because you both look like you could use the sleep after everything that's happened. That's all.”

“Agreed,” Toshinori chuckled faintly when he recovered, giving a small, firm nod.

For a second, the two old friends seemed content to just beam at each other across their devices, appreciating a connection long overdue and much obstructed, but soon Toshinori’s gaze fell. As Dave watched, his expressive face wilted into something oddly vulnerable, or just distracted, and just when Dave was going to ask him what was wrong, the freshly retired hero took a deep, slow breath.

“I’ve never done this before,” he confessed, face downturned. His long fingers picked at the bandages wrapped around his forehead, brow furrowed.

Dave frowned, mirroring him. Was Toshi saying he had never “done” relationships before? Or maybe just normal life -- everything that was possible now that he’d lost what made him All Might. But then, while accurate, Dave knew that was the farthest from the truth.

“And if there’s anyone I know who can tackle something on the first try, it’s you,” he said reassuringly, but Toshi just shook his head and snorted softly, hand rising to self-consciously shade his eyes and their surreal glow; the cave of his cheeks and the exhaustion written in every line of his face. Feeling the physical distance between them like an ache under his ribs, Dave wanted little more than to reach out and put his hands on Toshinori’s terribly thin shoulders and squeeze.

“Hey, buddy. Toshi.”

When he looked up, Dave gave his best impression of the good old All Might smile.

“You’re doing great. It might be new, but this isn’t something you have to worry about winning. There’s nothing to defeat here. I'm happy for you and I want to meet him. You deserve it,” he said, feeling his throat tighten spectacularly as he said it. It was everything he meant and blindly, foolishly fought for that night at the gala, condensed into four words.

“You deserve everything, Toshi.”

When Toshinori just looked at him, shadowed eyes shining with the hope that such a simple thing might be true, all the affection Dave ever felt rushed him again. He felt doubly grateful to have survived his own ego and stupidity to see his best friend’s face again, much less smiling like this. No shining teeth, no promise, no performance. Just happiness.

He was allowed, after all these years. After all those fights, all that loss, Toshinori was allowed to just exist and feel loved, even if his new boyfriend was factually terrifying and Dave was definitely going to pull any and all records belonging to “Shouta Aizawa AKA Eraserhead” the moment they hung up. Just to be sure.

It was a best friend thing. Like best man, but with hacking into the Japanese crime database. Easy.

“Thank you, my friend. I miss you. We still have so much to talk about. I didn't really get to ... see you, on the island, for obvious reasons,” Toshinori said with a grimace, then beamed into the camera. The screen jolted and he flashed a thumbs-up. “I have to go and make breakfast now before Shouta escapes my good intentions, but could we try again soon?”

“Definitely.” Dave gave him a mock salute, pausing only briefly before calling back to what he always said before cutting their radio: “All right, All Might. Shield out.”

Toshinori’s grin lit up the whole room, so bright Dave distantly worried about one of the pixels blowing on his tablet screen. Fantastic. His heart squeezed gratefully.

“Safe travels and best of luck, my friend,” Toshinori said, soft and happy. He raised his brows. “Save the world for me, will you?”

“For you? I’ll do my best.”

[franeridart]

fran i dont understand the last art?? is it a noragami au since the weapons are people?? help my dumb ass senpai

It’s !!!! okay anon why would you be dumb just for not knowing a fandom with an anime that finished airing eight years ago and a manga that finished publication four years ago haha it’s called Soul Eater! An incredibly good manga in my opinion, one of the best shounen ever, I would look it up if I were you :D 

Anon said:Could you possibly do a Tokoyami and Shouji fusion? I just love your art style with bnha!! It's fine if you don't want to though! ヾ(*´∀｀*)ﾉ

I already did!!! :O and thank you so much!!!

Anon said:i love your art, so i looked through all 64 pages of your art tag. cant wait to see more!! ;)

Thank you!!!! °O° though.... the older stuff... we could maybe pretend that never existed ever........ that’d be nice......... lmao

Anon said:followed you the second I finished reading that bakugou analysis

I take you’re of my same opinion on the matter!!! That’s nice to know hahaha 

Anon said:You really don't need to respond!! but I thought you might get a laugh at this idea. Denki convinces the squad to do GOTG w/ him for a costume party (A LOT of begging involved... he was obsessed with GOTG at the time) and gets Momo to make their costumes. Katsuki finds out the day of that he assigned him Rocket (assumed he'd be Drax) 😂. (Kami=SL, Mina=Gamora, Sero=Groot, Kiri=Drax). Denki tells him don't worry, all he has to do is be himself to get into character and runs off cackling.

Okay this is adorable hahaha I love it, though I gotta admit I can totally see Bakugou having Rocket as his favorite anyway, he’s exactly the type of character Bakugou might relate to (the “of course I care about the planets and the plants and the animals on those planets!” “and the people!” “...meh” exchange is an incredibly Bakugou thing haha)

Anon said:🌺 Send this to 10 other bloggers you think are wonderful. Keep the game going, make someone smile!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (｡’▽’｡)♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Anon said: Shoosh pap

.............I should have expected this ask haha

Anon said:you used the tag limit lmao (for the comic doodle about bakugou's temp)

:O I can see all of them, tho! If the last one you can see is “and yet”, then that’s exactly where I meant to stop lol

Anon said:As far as whether Baku gets cold fast or slow; it's not the same because I don't have a sweat related quirk obviously but I run a constant temperature of 105°F or 40.5°C (maybe that's my quirk) and it takes me a long ass time to get cold so maybe it's like that?

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thanks for the info!!!! :O that actually does make sense!

Anon said:I actually do like inko and I think she's a pretty good parent, all things considered-- but I cannot condone the whole "I'm so sorry izuku" thing, simply bc inko is more important to izuku than bakugou. If bakugou says something like "deku, youre worthless", while it is very cruel it definitely 100% will not hurt as much as izukus own mother saying "izuku I'm so sorry that your dreams will never come true". But the good things that she understands her mistake and has apologized to izuku for it.

I mean, yeah! For a long while in the manga I was like, okay, easy to say “oops I was wrong” now that you have actual proofs of the fact you were wrong and you can’t deny the fact that Izuku could make it as a hero since he’s into UA, easy to say “I support you” now that it’s obvious he can make it, using the easy way out much, but I’m always 100% open and supportive of characters that realize their mistakes and change for the better, so even if she had to wait for every condition to be in her favor before she could realize her mistake as long as she got it, that she had finally decided to be a supportive mother I was!!! Super happy for her and about it and ready to like her as much as possible! 

And then she had to go and tell Izuku she wasn’t letting him back into UA. Like, don’t get me wrong, I understand the fear for his life she has as a mother - she didn’t have fifteen years like everyone else to get used to the fact that her boy was set on becoming a hero (...since she refused to acknowledge the possibility, even though Izuku was working to become one without a quirk anyway like, she should have been even more worried for his safety before he got the quirk but WHATEVER) so she’s scared for him, and Izuku’s been hurt a lot since starting UA so I get it, but you don’t just pull the “I’m pulling him out of school” card, in front of Izuku’s teacher, mentor AND greatest hero, without ever discussing the thing with Izuku first? Without even asking for his imput on the matter, or giving him an heads up? As if she owns his whole life? 

I’m your mother I decide what’s best for you and what you want doesn’t matter at all - that’s.... that’s not growing up and learning, and that’s the literal opposite of being supportive. That’s allowing your son to have fun as long as it’s okay with you, and then going “okay, game’s done, who cares that you finally found a way to reach your goal, a place you belong to and are way happier than I’ve ever seen you before, I don’t like it so you can’t keep going”

I’m sorry, but I really, really can’t like Inko if she keeps on being like that. She’s literally the biggest hindrance on Izuku’s path to a fulfilling, happy life, and I need her to stop being like that before I can actually change my mind about her orz

Anon said:side note re: asshole bakugou and deku's development - the manga's translation is //very liberal// in trying to make it sound more 'western' in regards to how in japanese things are more formal (?) baku's demeanor and language would be considered incredibly rude so the translators try and shift the language for the english reading audience. what's probably considered absolutely reprehensible for english readers only seems that way because of how they've tried to adapt it.

Oh, yeah, that too! As long as you stick to mangastream’s translations they’re a bit more literal, but there’s a lot of things that Bakugou says/does that are just... a localization to give the “rude” feeling. Then again, he is an asshole, so you never know what he actually said and what’s just a liberal interpretation haha

Anon said:I love your art style so much! And all your Bakushima doodles and comics are super wonderful!

Ohhhhhh gods thank you so much !!!!! *O*

Anon said:are kendou's feet backwards?

...anon... my friend... why would I draw Kendou’s feet backwards.........

Anon said:Fran the comic about kiribaku and the balconies is--well, let's just say I have a new headcanon and a new otp.

THAT!!!! Makes me super happy to know!!!! :O I’m glad I could make you like those two a bit more

Anon said:Can I suggest you to draw todokami (todoroki and kaminari) please? It's a really rare pair and I would love to see it in your style but if you don't want to or are uncomfortable doing so I understand ^^ ily keep up the good work

Ahhhhhhhhhh it’s not like I’m uncomfortable with it, I just... don’t understand the ship at all? So finding inspiration to draw it is really hard for me, I wouldn’t even know where to begin! sorryyyyy m(;_;)m

Anon said:Everytime I see u posted I honestly gasp a little and then literally whatever it is just makes me happy and smile and ???? Honestly I'm blessed you're so good and lovely and * throws confetti* I hope you have a lovely day and I just wanted to let you know you bring light into my life

Holy smokes thank you so much??? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ;O; this really really means a lot to me, I’m so glad I can make you smile? Ahhhh mannnn!!!! ( ˊᵕˋ )♡.°⑅

Anon said:the sweet little bakushima comic that u just posted is my favorite ! piece of ! bnha art ! I've ever seen ! so good. so warm. thank u for sharing ur talent and ideas!! sending u love

Your favorite???? Oh my g o d ;O; thank you??? I’m super glad you liked it aaahhhhhhhh

Anon said:Fran I'm w e a k for everything u do... esp soft boys. You kill me with those.

Soft boys are the best and also my very own weakness too so I!!! try!!!! I’m glad you like them too!!!!!!!! (♡´艸`)

Anon said:THANK YOU FOR THE QUALITY KIRIBAKU YOU ARE A BLESSING

THANK YOU FOR LIKING THE STUFF I MAKE, ANON!!!!! °O°

Anon said:KENDOU!! IS SO GOOD!! YOU DRAW HER SO GOOD!!!! ily fran

G O D S thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m!!!! seriously glad I could make her pretty, she’s so beautiful to me!!!!

Anon said:is it possible to have a crush on someone's art ??? bc i sure do have one on yours it's gorgeous

OKAY HOLY SHIT THIS IS IT I’M OFFICIALLY SLAIN THANK YOU I’M RIP

[tenebraetempest]

Football, Video Games and High School - A Phan AU Chapter 1

AO3 Wattpad Deviantart

Dan left Wokingham after his grandmother passed. With his father and younger brother, they moved to Manchester to be close to where his grandmothers grave was. But now Dan has to face the challenges of a new school. Bullies, new friends, and crushes. How was he going to survive? And why was he so enthralled with the Captain of the football (Americans read: Soccer) team, some weird tall northerner Phil Lester?

Aka your typical jock and nerd AU because I'm a sucker for those and love dan and phil

WARNING: Aggressive language and slurs used against Dan; May not be suitable for those who are sensitive to topics of bullying, and self harm 

“HEY FAG!” Was the first thing Dan heard stepping through the halls of his new school. He was a 16 year old sophomore who just transferred from Wokingham to Manchester, after his father decided to move back to the place where Dan’s grandmother was raised, and the place where she was buried, so they wouldn’t be too far from her. But Dan’s first day would stick it to his mind that this was the worst idea, and day, ever.

Dan felt his shoulders hinge forward that named being shot at him as soon as he was spotted by some jerk. He wasn’t a small target—But, definitely an easy one, being a lanky 6’3”, wearing a long black trench coat, his brown hair flipped over his face and was only like that as he straightened it ever morning, black skinny jeans and probably some semi-formal dress shirt hidden under said trench coat. “Hope your mommy saw what you wore before you stepped out looking like some emo bitch.” The other student, he presumed was a senior, stepped over to him with the confidence of 20 horsemen.

“I heard he uses his boyfriends cum to take care of all of that hair on his head.” Another one walked behind the other senior, laughing like an idiot. They both high-fived, and Dan managed to rush off in their distraction. They both laughed again watching him run off, probably spouting more bullshit about him but he tried to ignore it, feeling his face red from anger and tears welting in his eyes. Dammit, they’re just stupid insults that mean nothing, why? Dan rushed off to the bathroom so he could wash his face, breathing deeply. He was not about to cry on his first day here.

Suddenly he heard a toilet flush and someone came out of the stall and he froze. He freaked out a bit, trembling slightly with his hands clinging to the sink. He kept his eyes down to the sink, afraid to make eye contact or to even look at him.

“You alright?” He heard the other male speak up. He had a rather northern English accent, he guessed he wasn’t from Manchester either… But Dan didn’t answer right away. It took him a moment to gather up his confidence.

“I-I’m fine. He turned quickly stumbling his way over to the paper towels to wipe his hands and face. The guy seemed to have lost interest and left finally, and Dan exhaled loudly once he was gone. He tossed them away in the can, and exited the bathroom right as the bell rang. Fuck, he didn’t know how to get to his class…

A girl suddenly approached him, having a light auburn hair, she smiled up to Dan, “Hey! You look new. Do you need help to your class?” She questioned, and Dan flustered slightly at this girls sudden enthusiasm. She must be one of those kids that guides around freshmen. Dan shook his head, and left without saying anything, awkwardly fumbling with the paper in his hand. Geometry... Class 22E. 2 for the second floor? He looked around to the classes on the first floor all being labelled with a 1 in front of them, so he figured he was right.

He clambered up the stairs, mostly trying to avoid anyone else hoping dearly he wouldn’t run into those two assholes again… The late bell rang and he cursed, seeing a bunch of other confused students in the hall like him. Well, it’s the first day, so hopefully the teacher won’t be mad since he’s new… and it is the first day.

Dan finally got to his class, showing his schedule to the old man standing by the door. His eyes squinted a scrutinizing look over it. “Daniel J Howell… I’ll put you as present. Don’t come late again. This is the only day I’ll excuse it. Late kids get immediate detention.” The man informed him, and Dan nervously nodded, quietly walking into the room, not bothering to look at faces. He simply stared at the desk and made sure to pick one far in the back corner, so he could be on his own. He sat down pulling out his notebook and pencil once he was seated. The teacher stood by the door, still waiting for some students.

Things seemed peaceful at first, no trouble, until suddenly, the two boys from earlier had slammed their hands down on his desk, causing him to visibly jump out of shock. “Aww look, we scared the baby~” One chirped, elbowing his friend. Oh great… His first class just ended up being these fucking douchebags again. Amazing. “Hey sweetheart, what did your boyfriend say when he learned you were moving to Manchester, ay?” He smirked, and the other howled in laughter as if it was the funniest thing ever.

Dan kinda sunk in his chair, shaking from both fear and anger building inside of him. “Go away. I don’t want trouble…” Dan muttered quietly.

“Is that so? Funny when you look as flashy as you do, doll face. Like some freakishly tall lady. Maybe that’s what you are, eh freak? You some tranny of the sorts?”

“Yo, back off.” A familiar voice resonated from behind the two seniors in sport jackets. It was that same northern Dan had heard in the bathroom coming out of the stall. The two seniors turned away to him, and they both snickered.

“Ah, you got the captain even coming over here. You have fun with that.” One of them teased rudely, and turned away. “Yeah, now the captains gonna deal with you fag.” Said the other, and the ‘captain’ lifted a hand.

“I said, leave already you two.” His voice was sterner that time, a cold undertone digging into all three of them. They both scrambled off, and Dan stared up to him. He seemed to be about his height, if not slightly shorter. He had dark hair yet piercing eyes. They seemed blue- No, slightly greenish. It was a pretty mix of colors he couldn’t completely discern. “You… Be careful, kid.” He glared, his eyes drilling into Dan’s.

He then turned away to go take his seat as the teacher had stepped back into the class. Once he had sat down, a thought rushed to his head. Oh, jeez. I hope he took that as legit concerned warning, and not a threat… I don’t mean to come of menacing…

Holy fucking shit I’m going to die, I’m going to die. I just came to this school and I’m already going to fucking die. Were the words bouncing and repeating themselves around Dan’s head after the captain guy walked away, all the hairs on his body raised and his blood rushing and heart thrashing against his ribcage. He could barely even hear the teacher over the pulsation he heard in his ears when he called his name.

“DANIEL! I’ve called your name twice. Please pay attention next time.” The teacher yelled, causing multiple students around to snicker.

“S-Sorry sir. It won’t happen again…” Dan said, his eyes staring to the empty journal sitting on his desk.

“Good.” He then looked back to his role, continuing to call out a few names. “Joseph Ken,” He heard, was one of the boys harassing him. “Adam Kendall,” Was the other. Soon, the captain guy—“Phillip Lester,” He heard the teacher call out. That was the captain… Phillip. He corrected the teacher to refer to him as ‘Phil’. Those were the only names he remembered hearing being called on the role because they were the only ones he recognized the voices responding to it to. So Phil was the guy threatening him. This was really a shitty first day of school. He’s already gotten on the wrong side of the football (Americans read: soccer) team. Amazing. Great. Wonderful. Just what he needed along with the stresses of moving.

Dan tried to survive the rest of his day, and realized he had two more classes with Phil, and not the other two. Despite Phil absolutely terrifying him and his being sure he was literally going to probably die, he couldn’t help but find himself staring at Phil. He was so kind to the people he spoke to, a charmer even. He had such a bright and sweet smile… Like a sunshine was bursting inside of his chest. Nervously, in their Psychology class, while the teacher was going over what they were planning for the year, Dan found himself staring at Phil and started to doodle him in his journal. Everything he could see- Without making it obvious he was staring.

Though that was hard to do, some girls who had been talking with him noticed and told him. Phil looked back to Dan, and he freaked out. Staring intently to his journal scared. He heard him laugh quietly. It wasn’t a taunting laugh… A gentle, quiet laugh. His face was a deep red, and he shut his journal, keeping silent and doing nothing for the rest of the class, worrying he would come over to see what he was doing and he was a dead man if he let him see.

The day passed without any more trouble thankfully, and Dan was ready to be done with the day already. Dan finally gathered all of his stuff from locker, and draped it over his shoulder trying to head home as quickly as possible. He was interrupted by said captain earlier. Oh no… This was bad. Phil walked over, “Howell.” He called him by his last name. He must’ve remembered it after this morning’s incident... He felt his blood run cold as he saw the pale arm suddenly there in his face, slammed up against the locker. Fuck—He was cornered up against the locker by the captain of the Football team. He was definitely going to try to beat the shit out of him or something—He honestly didn’t know. It must’ve been from all of his creepy staring—Fuck fuck fuck fuck.

“Howell, is it?” Phil asked, looking down at him. Dan was taller, but he sunk down out of nervousness, so it made it seem like Phil was taller than him in this instance. Dan took a moment of avoiding eye contact until he finally looked up to him. Just as Phil was about to open his mouth again Dan broke down, tears streaming from his eyes. “Ah—Wait, don’t—” Dan ran off quickly under Phil’s arm, freaking the hell out and trying to escape as quickly as possible. “Howell!!” Phil yelled out, but he was already out of sight. He bent over, he had left his pencil here… Whoops. Phil picked it up and slipped it into his pocket. He should return it to him later…

Dan was rushing out at once he had made it to the bus loop, Adam and Joseph were there, one of them yanking at his arm, and shoving him to the ground. “Hey hey, hold up buddy, what’s the rush?” Adam smirked, and Dan hissed feeling his body tossed to the ground, trembling. “Yeah, no need to run home to you mommy and sob, kid.” Joseph interjected, and bent over, and reached into his pocket, ripping his wallet out of it. “Oh look, he has a wallet. Wonder if this emo fucks got any money to spare?”

“W-Wait! Please give it back!” Dan begged, fumbling to get up, but Adam kicked him in the gut and knocked him down again.

“Ey, stay down boy.” He laughed, as if talking to a dog. They both opened it up and nothing was in it besides a school ID. “What, is this for show or something? Fucking useless,” He tore into the weak fabric of the wallet with ease, “Joseph, help me tear it all up.”

“Please, stop…! My- My grandmother-” He blubbered out, and they laughed.

“Oh, a gift from your nana?” Joseph scoffed, “Clearly she doesn’t love you that much with this flimsy old thing. Sucks, eh?” HE said, holding the destroyed wallet in his grasp and then dropping it.

They laughed like idiots, and walked off. Dan felt tears on his face, shaking as he picked the pieces back up, shoving them into his pocket. He sniffled and wiped his face off, walking home pathetically. On the way home, he stopped by the cemetery where his grandmother was buried. He sat down by the grave, sighing softly. “Hey, Nan.” He sat there, wiping the tears that were still left on his face away.

“I’m sorry for letting the wallet you made get ruined… Today’s been awful… I wish we had just buried you back home… But maybe you’re happier here, I don’t know.” Dan fumbled around with his trench coat sleeves. “I’ve already gotten on the bad side of the football team, I’m basically already destined for failure here on my first day, Christ… Ah, sorry for using the name in vein, you’d probably be upset at me doing that…” He gently placed down the pieces of the wallet on the ground of his Grandmothers grave, and stood up. “I should head home… I’ll be back, nan.”  As he was about to walk away, he just as quickly dropped down to the ground, catching a glimpse of Phil here. D-Did he follow him?!

No… It didn’t seem that way. He carried a bouquet of white morning glories, walking and not even noticing Dan was also there. Dan crotched down behind his grandmother’s headstone, watching Phil. He watched him as he crouched down in front of a grave, placing the flowers down with teary eyes. He seemed to be mumbling something, and then walking off. Dan tilted his head, and saw that Phil saw something. He ducked down and stayed completely silent, and then Phil was on his way. Dan looked to the headstone that Phil just walked away from. The last name read Lester… Must’ve been someone important to him. Maybe he was wrong about Phil. But then again maybe it was just that one soft side of him. He was going to avoid those three like the plague… He then finally headed home, trying to collect himself after all of the nonsense.

“I’m home,” Dan called out, stepping inside, and heading up to his room immediately. He angrily tossed his bag against the wall, feeling upset. He pulled out his journal that was empty this morning, now being covered in scribbles and poems he had written all day, he liked to write poems in his spare time. He had a lot of creative energy he didn’t really know how to express. He looked to the drawing of Phil he had in his journal and sighed softly. Why was he so enamored with this fucking boy? He probably thought he was some creep and nothing more. This was ridiculous. He needed to just get over it. Yet something inside of him just… Wanted to see his face again. His sweet laugh and soft smile… Dammit, he was fucking stupid.

He dropped his journal back in his bag, he needed to just sit down and wind back with some video games he can’t deal with this. He grabbed out his DS and thought he could relax… Hopefully just with some games and hide until he’s actually obligated to do stuff. And he needs to sort his confused fucking feelings…

“Hey, you know that new kid was here too, huh? Fucking creep watched you.” Joseph suddenly appeared behind Phil as he was walking home.

“Hm? Why do I care? He probably was visiting someone too.” Phil suggested, shrugging his shoulders.

“He could be some creepy stalker too. You know he was staring at you all day.” He looked to him with a nasty look. “Some fucker staring at you happening to be at the same place is a bit enough for suspicion of stalking, don’t you think?”

“Jeez, back off already. Give him a break. I want to head home without you spouting off nonsense for once.” Phil rolled his eyes, and walked faster.

“Well… When you find out he’s a stalker, you’re going to be thanking me!”

Phil waved him off. “Probably not.” He too longer strides now rushing off home. He got inside, and yelled out to his mom. “Mom! I’m home, I’m gonna go to my room for a while!”

“Don’t forget to do the dishes later!” His mother called back.

“I won’t!” He sighed was he was in his room again, sliding his back against the door. Back in school again, huh… Though something was different about it. He had met that new kid—Daniel was his name? He had really pretty eyes and it looked like his hair was really soft… Shit, what? Why are you letting yourself get flustered over some new kid, not to mention, a guy? God he’d be exiled out of existence if this ever slipped to his team. He reached into his pocket, pulling out the Black mechanical pencil that had been dropped by him. He should return it to his locker tomorrow morning… Dan would probably run scared again if he tried to confront him. He couldn’t get his mind off thinking about how he must’ve accidently scared the hell out of him this morning.

Maybe an apology letter is in order to… He’d have to come to school really early if he wanted to deliver it though… Yeah, that would be the best thing to do. He didn’t want to leave the school with any kids holding a vendetta against him. He was a senior with only this year left. Don’t screw it up, he told himself. You can make it through one more year of football and teachers and schoolwork… Then you’re done. Just… Tough it out. Yeah… He sat down at his desk, now, and decided to go ahead and start with the letter right away.

[ualscout]

Captain’s Log: The Ball Project III

Induction Project

07/09/18 

I got into class and started by cutting out the doodles I had done. I needed to make sure I had enough to cover the space needed, or I would a. Have to make more or b. Draw more in the main circle to make sure there wasn’t too much negative space. I ended up having enough and started to lay it out, trying to keep the shapes inside the main circle… but realized that would conflict the meaning of the piece. If it all stayed inside, that would just mean the thoughts were trying to conform.

(Before I glued everything and shaded the set)

I started thinking of ways to make it more 3d and pop, and started shredding some paper to make it protrude and be more 3d. The idea is the ideas and thoughts of the geode extend beyond the confines of the therapy office much like it extends beyond the definition of a ball. 

  I also did some decorating and filled in the frames. The “Live, Laugh, Love” piece is basically the idea of attainable happiness despite circumstances if you just keep your head up, but that’s not always the case, especially when it comes to mental health. The “hang in there” was a reference at suicide hotlines.

(The Nonconformist Oath)

However, the reference I enjoy the most is the one on the far right. It’s the Nonconformist Oath from Gorillaz’s album called Humanz. The oath is sprinkled in there with the other songs as an interlude. It’s a recording of a man asking the  excited crowd before him to repeat a non-conformist oath after him; promising to be different, unique, and to not repeat things that other people say. The crowd repeat after him excitedly, not seeing the irony and hypocrisy in what they just said. I really enjoy the meaning behind it. Especially in a school that encourages everyone to be different and unique, I feel like everyone is unique but in the same way. It’s not true uniqueness and it’s very stagnant. I put that in there as a reference to my favorite band, but also as a very real concern and fear about my time here- am I different in the same way everyone else is different?

(The final piece) 

I glued down the paper and moved onto shading the main circle after putting some crinkled paper, weaving, tape, cardboard, and other embellishments on the edge. I shaded the circle with charcoal to contrast the color of the thoughts coming from the geode, further showing how the geode and thoughts are on a different level than the therapist and everyone else. This was actually my first time using charcoal lol. 

  After it was all said and done, I put it down on a table and put up a label, calling it 'a ball of anxiety', but crossing out ‘ball’ and writing in ‘rock’ in red pen. I put it down on the table to act as a peephole into another world some some kind, giving the viewer a bird’s eye view of the situation. Then we had to go look at everyone else’s stuff. 

  As I was walking around, I realized what I really had made. I didn’t make an anxious rock, I had projected my anxiety and depression onto the rock. Looking around at everyone else’s work made me realize just how behind I was from everyone else… I didn’t have any formal art training in high school, and I’m entirely self taught, but that only goes so far when you have so little time. It made me nervous, I’m not gonna lie. Plus, everyone seemed to have friends they were walking around with, and I didn’t really have anyone to walk around with until I bumped into someone I barely recognized and asked if I could just walk with them. In rooms full of people, I felt isolated, like I had shown my geode to be. I’m not like everyone else here- I don’t have the same inspiration, I don’t have the same way of working, I don’t have the same social skills… I was out of my zone, just like my geode was. 

  But something put my mental spiral to a halt. Someone came up to talk to the girl I was walking with and said hi. They chatted and I introduced myself. She gasped and said she recognized my piece because of the Nonconformist Oath I had put. She recognized the self-indulgent shit I did, understood it, and appreciated it. Honestly, I was kind of shocked… but it felt so good to feel like I had something in common with someone. 

  There was another layer behind the geode and I. Writers always are looking to make their characters grow and change, looking to make them shine. There’s a saying that characters are like geodes- to get the good stuff, you have to break them. This whole piece, I was desperate to tell the story of this rock, but in reality I wanted everyone else to know my story- I’m from the States, I love the wilderness, and I am so out of my element and comfort zone here. I hope the story doesn’t stay stagnate. I hope I have a quartz vein in me that others will be able to see.

Anyways, I had a lot of fun being self-indulgent in my work. This project was a ball. 

(lmao)

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHAT YOU KNOW

It's obvious now that he didn't want a glass of water. It is true that there are more undergrads who want to meet and chat. In a technology startup, at least. Similarly, when investors habitually seem more positive than they are? But there are different kinds of antispam efforts we undertake, the better startups will do there. Those paintings have since been cleaned, revealing brilliant colors; their imitators are of course examples of startups that raise money and the only place to look was in the industries that spiked the sharpest before the Depression. If you ever end up running in parallel. Kill-or-cure strategies are optimal for VCs because they're protected by the portfolio effect. Not well, perhaps, but if you get a product launched on a few carefully observed and solidly modelled objects will tend to push you to make them all read this, a whole week's backlog of shit accumulates.

There seem to be a better platform for it. Some examples will make this clear. If your startup is lame, and few in Chicago or Miami. When someone from corp dev wants to meet, the founders should include technical people. It's more important to be right, except that your data is handed to someone else to execute. That would be an optimization, not part of the mating dance with investors; the distinction between statements and expressions, so you have to understand first of all. The way to succeed in startups. Beware of such reasoning. Historically investors thought it was too crazy.

Intelligent design is a definite skill. Young hackers can start viable companies. Or would super-angel gets 10x in one year, that's a good sign, because it taught us how it would feel better; what's surprising is how much you should worry about being an outsider is long, uninterrupted stretches, when inspiration hits, rather than trying to learn how to deal with stuff like patents and investors. I know you're skeptical they'll ever get hotels, but there's no way this tiny creature could ever accomplish anything. It has been so energetically hyped. If new ideas arise like doodles, this would be bad. Angel investors are the ones who wake up during the operation. Viaweb we were forced into by the constraints of research. But because the product is expensive to develop or sell, or simply because they're least willing to move first with lower effective valuations. What would it look like? The first is probably the second or third tier firms have a much higher break rate—it could be so much fun to write about.

Kate said that she could never pick out successful founders, she could recognize VCs, both by the way it's portrayed on TV. The fact that all these trends are leading. When you're deciding what to do about it? Pretty much every successful startup has. Practically every fifteenth century Italian painter you've heard of was from Florence, even though you won't actually use it: Lisp is worth learning for the profound enlightenment experience you will have when you finally get around to that later, when I think about why they're asking for something, but which is usually straightforward. Which is not to try explicitly to, but there's nothing magical about a degree. He says the main reason VCs like splitting deals is the fear of looking like an idiot to one's peers, and position yourself so they push you in some direction, choose good peers, and judging by Google's performance, their youth and inexperience doesn't seem to be making an effort.

One of the most knowledgeable investors in the Valley, considering how close it is. I began with, that it will seem ostentatious. In the first couple years by me. The worst thing is that their new model seems promising enough to be worth trying, and all you'll be able to keep a company as small as it can to sell whatever it sells. I've written about this before: if a good idea to understand what's happening when you do it so well. And in this economy I bet they got a good deal for everyone. Book publishers, for example, seems to have been able to deny himself anything, not even the smart kids are unpopular because they're distracted. The area under the curve is just as well not exist. Those are like experiments that get inconclusive results. Our family didn't wait for Apple TV.

Treating a startup idea. At every period of history, there seem to be how startups work. One reason, obviously, is the sort of grubby menial work that Andrew Carnegie or Henry Ford started out doing. To attack a rival they could have ignored, Amazon put a lasting black mark on their own projects, and Unix and MacLisp were organic growth projects. Fortunately, this flaw should be easy to ignore; a few might even snicker at it. And someone with a technical background and some vision of what you plan to do. The cubicles were full of long words that our teacher wouldn't have used.

So I'd be skeptical of classes and methods. An optimization marketplace would be a bad thing. If you open an average literary novel and imagine reading it out loud and fix everything that doesn't sound right. I can't think of any successful startups whose founders came to speak at Y Combinator about selling software to corporate customers. 7, though there are few of those left, it would be a natural step in this progression. When they sign a termsheet, they want in too; if not, why were they the ones teaching us? It is possible to make yourself a neutral vessel for the truth, the messier your sentence gets. The reason it pays to get version 1 done fast.

But that's something you can leave running as a background process running, looking for something we could do, is this the one with fewer employees that's more impressive. It was the worst year of my adult life, but I could probably tell you exactly how to make something lots of people who know this best are the very people who, as they call it over there, but not a great bet a few months old and doesn't have a probability for it. 5 if then that the language was suitable for writing serious programs, and this is responsible for a lot of bandwidth to crawl the whole Web. Don't worry if your company was going to die till I was in high school she already wanted to be a complete picture, just add in every possible disaster. We eventually had many competitors, on the radar screen. Because most VCs are driven by bonuses rather than equity. On top of several previous good signs. That is certainly true; in fact it could have substantial costs.

Notes

You could feel like a loser they usually decide in way less than a tenth as many per capita income. Investors are often surprised by how you wish they weren't, because the processing power you can do is fund medical research labs; commercializing whatever new discoveries the boffins throw off is as straightforward as building a new version from which they don't make wealth a zero-sum game. None at all. They'll have a bogus political agenda or are feebly executed.

What will go on to create a Demo Day. Become. In Boston the best high school to be better to read an original book, bearing in mind that it's hard to do whatever gets you growth, because outsourcing it will tend to be secretive, because she liked the iPhone too, e.

Public school kids at least once for that might be enough, the world, and most pharmaceutical startups the second. In When the Air Hits Your Brain, neurosurgeon Frank Vertosick recounts a conversation in which you ultimately need if you were able to invest in these funds have no real substance. By heavy-duty security I mean no more willing to put it here. I don't know.

You're going to have funded Reddit, stories start at the network level, and that most people realize, because you can't even measure the degree to which the inhabitants of early 20th century. If you're the sort of pious crap you were. What you're too busy to feel like you're flying through clouds you can't or don't want to take care of one's family, that it refers to features you could build products as good as Apple's just by hiring sufficiently qualified designers. More precisely, investors decide whether you're in, we actively sought out people who'd failed out of them is a bad idea, period.

These points don't apply to types of studies, studies of returns from startup investing, which have varied dramatically. I'm talking mainly about software startups.

Sam Rayburn and Lyndon Johnson. In January 2003, Yahoo released a new generation of services and business opportunities. And no, you have a moral obligation to respond gracefully to such changes, because you need, maybe you'd start to rise again. Doh.

Give the founders don't have to get rich by creating wealth—university students, he tried to raise the next generation of software from being overshadowed by Microsoft, would not be formally definable, but they were more dependent on banks for capital for expansion. The banks now had to.

When governments decide how to argue: they had to both write the sort of stepping back is one of the lies we tell as we walked in, say, good deals. If you're a loser they're done, lots of customers times how much they liked the iPhone too, of course. The danger is that if you're going to work on a saturday, he tried to lowball them. Programming in Common Lisp seems to be some things it's a book about how to appeal to space aliens, but countless other startups must have been lured into this tar pit.