#damn i still need to give this a name
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Little Bit of Yeva/Rory for this Yuri Sunday
☆☆☆
"Come dance with me," Rory says, as though it's the most natural thing in the world. As though Yeva hasn't been drawing circles in the condensation from her glass, anxiously waiting for someone to notice that she doesn't belong here.
Bianca hadn't seemed surprised to see her walk into the Officer's Club with Rory, but then nothing Rory does seems to startle her co-pilot. Rory had barely spared a glance around the club before making a beeline for the booth their crew had chosen, moving as though pulled by invisible strings. It sends a deep pang through Yeva's chest, that magnetism. She misses it.
"If you wanna dance, sir, there's at least a dozen men with their jaws on the floor over there. Why not ask one 'a them?"
"Because I'm asking you." Rory responds without missing a beat. She has to notice how men's eyes trail her wherever she goes, the way she doesn't even flinch at Yeva's words. Yet she ignores them, attention settled intently on Yeva instead. Those honey-amber eyes, which glowed under the soft lights of the corner booth, cherry red lips settled in a firm, uncompromising line.
She could be shooting the shit with Lemmons and Raff right now, instead of staring at her pilot's painted lips and wondering why the steel in her gaze was causing an itch to race under her skin.
"I can make it an order, Sergeant." Yeva hisses, causing Sidi to giggle. Bianca lifts her beer, surreptiously trying to hide a smirk by taking a sip. How she'd forgotten that she wasn't alone at the table is beyond her, but she's certain it's somehow Rory's fault.
"No one is going to kick you out," Bianca pipes up, "If they did, they'd have to go through the Bulldog here, and that's too much of a headache to bother. So you might as well dance."
Rory beams, reaching over to pat her co-pilot's cheek, but Bianca swats her hand away. "I'm not on your side, I'm just trying to save her from your relentless badgering. You're annoying."
Yeva watches as Rory grins at this. The easy banter reminds her of Mina and Lizzie--the waist gunners from her first crew. How they'd sling insults back 'n forth across the belly of the fort as they flew across the channel, and then move like a single flame spread between two bodies the moment the flak started. She is aware suddenly of the acute absence of Butchie, who she had known only briefly. Still, the empty space the bombardier should've been occupying makes the booth feel too large.
"Well?" Rory holds out her hand. It's just one silly dance, but it feels like a whole lot more. Like an offering. Like a second chance. Like taxiing down the runway, in the seconds right before the wheels lift off, when you doubt for a moment that it's possible to get this behemoth of metal and glass and ten bright-eyed girls to float on air.
"I'm shit at dancing," Yeva admits, a hedge, an ingenious curved wing design.
"Lucky for you, I'm brilliant. Come on, I'll lead," Rory says. Upward thrust, winning out against the gravity of her fear. She takes Rory's hand.
#nora rafferty mention if you squint bc engineers stick tgr#no one look too closely im choosing to post this despite the teeny tiny spoiler in there#just look at the women yayyy wimen#yeva rosova#rory rodriguez#mota fic#my fic#damn i still need to give this a name#holding them in my hands gently. i just think that they
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I am exhausted, good heavens.
#hey watch this neat trick I can do [cries]#love that for me#BUT#BUT- the actual EFFORT I put these days to not make a suicide jokes is *chefs kiss* phenomenal#actively shitting bricks as I physically have to stop myself from saying I want a car to hit me for the 50th time that day#I am not progressing any more than I am downgressing or whatever the opposite word is. but girlies#and boysies and peepsies#my lipgloss is popping and my eyebags are gucci- and so I shall prevail#MAN this tiredness is BONE DEEP man- it's like it's engraved into my goddamn clavicles#sorry that was like the only bone name I could remember- I don't even know what a clavicle is#anyways- I need to fall asleep forever and never wake up. But not in like a dying way#I just need to stop waking up tired and being tired and going to sleep tired and living tired like GIRL#WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN SLEEP STOPS SLEEPING#I JUST SLEPT 10 HOURS HOW ARE YOU STILL TIRED#I am so tired that i stopped liking shit- like that SUCKS my dudes#I sometimes Don't Like art now and that is WILD to me because that was lowkey the One Thing that got me going#I used to actually LIKE english class! and reading Shakespear and shit!!!! and history class!! Now I don't!! Where did the spark go??????#Now everything feels like a chooooooore and it sucks major dick#and my graaaades are slipping because I stopped giving a damn but I NEED. TO. GIVE. A. DAMN#because those are like highkey lowkey and every-other-key my grades and I need them to go into uni so I don't die <333#I need to spite little mini me who said I wasn't going to live past 13 because BITCH- guess how old I'm turning next week????????#THAT'S RIGHT- 17 YEARS OLD- FUCK YEAH BABY I'M STILL NOT DEAD#SUCK MY BIG ASS SHLONG MINI-ME#and then I have a big biology exam the day after so- funnnnn!!#anywho- should I tag this as vent? this probably counts as vent right? like among us? impostor and shit?#sorry I think my brain is actively rotting out of my ears right now#vent post#personal vent#tw vent#tw sui talk
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Ok ok ok I'm not Tryna start discourse but bluestars prophecy was my first ever warriors book and bluestar will always be my favourite so I'm gonna make some counterpoints to you about her being a Smajor character
bluestar has always been led by an intense loyalty and dedication to those she loves and cares for - this includes her mum, her sister, her clan, eventually Firepaw when he joins the clan, and she has a VERY strong moral compass when it comes to doing the right thing - when she sees thistleclaw teaching tigerpaw to hurt a then baby scourge she very much discourages it and is against it
Afaik scott is Not like that, he doesn't have an emotional or love-driven moral code, he does things because they're smart decisions in the long term or because he wants to. Granted I havent seen a ton of his stuff but I have seen his limited life and 3rd life perspectives and he is very much a singular team player there, there to look after himself and well if people align with him that's great he's got allies (jimmy and Martyn) but he won't go out of his way to care for them
Bluestars defiance of starclan in the first series is BECAUSE she gave herself to them and what the warrior code demanded so much - yes she broke clan rules by having kids with crookedstar but she did everything in her power to make sure they'd have a happy life and felt terrible that thrushpelt was willing to say they were his to save her reputation. She didn't do it out of a selfish want, she only ever wanted to help her clan and those she loved, and her becoming clan leader is emblematic of that want. When she rejects starclan so wholeheartedly in the first series it's because THINGS KEEP GOING WRONG WHEN SHES TRIED SO HARD TO STOP THEM FROM DOING THAT - starclan has never cared about the sacrifices she made to keep her loved ones and clan safe, she lost her mother, her sister, her kits, her mate, literally everything, and things STILL KEEP GETTING WORSE. it's not a demand that she deserves to have everything good, it's a cry for help that shouldn't something go right after she's tried so hard???
C!Scott isn't like that. He puts himself above others and inherently believes he will get the best if he just plays his cards right, and he is good at it, he's very competent at lasting a long time in life series and getting what he wants - the ruthlessness of gem driven by desperation kills him in secret life, Martyn's complete fucking about face kills him in limited life, and I'm pretty sure it's etho who gets him out in 3rd life by luck. He doesn't plan to look after the ones he cares about, because he cares about himself first and foremost. Yeah you can argue when he doesn't get what he wants he gets annoyed, but his is less of a 'why don't I get this don't I deserve it' and more of a 'oh fuck this didn't work. Ok new plan double down on getting what I want by appeasing to people cos they're easy to read and therefore account for'
I don't doubt Scott would make a bluestar adjacent character if he made a warrior cats oc BUT his character would honestly be closer to darktail or ashfur than bluestar and that's that on that.
(sorry you activated 13 year old me's unskippable cutscene sjdjsjsjja this isnt meant to be a serious argument I just love bluestar a lot and love talking about her)
OKAY 1. this is fucking awesome thank you 2. i am going to do something new and exciting (advocate for scott instead of beating him to death with sticks) because unfortunately this bluestar info has only made me believe she is a smajor character even more.
As a general note when I talk about smajor characters as a collective here I’m referring to characters more in the realm of esmp/traffic/rats/pirates/etc, less vampire scott or necromancer scott who are intended to be villainous.
Scott characters tend to operate under a “If I am not a Good Person I may as well die” rule, and consequently abide by a strict moral code to keep themselves feeling clean. For instance: traffic Scott will never go back on his word, he will avoid dishonesty, and he won’t take from others unless he is sure that he can repay them. He will never betray his seasonal primary ally (even when they betray him first), and will often give people things just because they asked him nicely. He stakes a lot of his own identity on this, because it is through being a “good person” that he justifies his superiority (and, by extension, his own existence); in his mind he deserves the best and *is* the best because he is such a good person. When things don’t go his way, he thinks he doesn’t deserve it because he has been nothing but good, so he tries to place a reason. He often assumes that somebody must “have a vendetta” against him, even if this somebody is the world (see: him asking if limlife episode 1 boogeyman is some kind of joke played on him for not giving in to the boogey curse in Last Life.) which is very Bluestar to me, convinced that her misfortunes are a divine punishment.
This is all to say that Scott does have a strict moral code and deep sense of loyalty. Being a “good person” and devoted partner in the ways he understands it are so ingrained into what he is that I think he definitely has the capacity to be a Bluestar if he were raised being taught clan values, even if his internal systems are often built around never letting gross emotions be fully felt rather than what those emotions compel him to do.
#ive always wanted to partake in pointless character debate on tumblr#considered maintagging this but didnt want people looking at your ask weird. sorry yall we serve fucked up scott here#“But bree” you might ask “what about pearl? He wasnt a very devoted partner then!”#and to that I say: pearl isnt a person to him. and neither is jimmy. Scott fucked up with both of them and unfortunately if he is not good-#and justified 100% of the time he loses his entire identity so convincing himself that they are incompetent or crazy so that he#doesnt have to self reflect is how he gets by. he would literally rather kill himself than earnestly admit fault for anything#… huh. about the above tags I dont remember the lore but is there any parallel there with the whole bright heart thing#genuine question bc I do not remember why blue star did that and I dont trust the wiki#(Trying to space out names so they dont tag)#I really hope this makes sense btw bc I feel like I usually list a lot more examples… but im tired#I can elaborate on any point here if need be ig. I dont talk about this aspect of him often because the literal entire fandom does already#Every scott analysis post out there is about his damn loyalty… anyways yeah scotts loyalty is transactional more often than emotional but#It’s still loyalty and also. hard to draw the line between where the emotions stop sometimes because he can stop giving a fuck about—#most things on a whim. How much scott genuinely cares about something is a forever undefinable concept#asks#he is genuinely a very good ally to have usually. like jimmy was very much the exception there#he does like helping people out he does. he’s just also emotionally detached so he tallies his favors and good deeds to bring up later if—#someone he’s helped decides to go against him. If that makes sense#sorry man I just keep talking. I love this blue animal…….#thanks for the ask genuinely I love when paragraphs about characters#anyways im gonna pass out and. Shakes myself STOP ADDING MORE TAGSSS i think im so tired man
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If wumuti doesn't get scouted or go solo in the next twenty-five seconds I WILL be killing myself
#dumb fuck ted talk#i knew it was coming but i never learn#don't talk to me im still not over it#i was gonna lose anyways. all my faves were on different teams.#whoever decided groups of four i got beef. we could have had an exo 2.0#or. hear me out. give me rights to debut six. wumuti sunyoul jaeup donghun woong bain#give them a year and a half contract with a pretty name and consider me *sold*#i cant let mnet keep robbing my man like this 😔😔#i need him to be *appreciated* god dAMn iT#wumuti#build up#post build up
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Calling it before the season even comes out
post-season 4, I'm gonna be shipping Sofia and Topper's girlfriend after they (hopefully canonically) leave Rafe and Top because these girls need each other to confirm that theyre not crazy, their exes are
#I love sofia- i do- i find the concept of her and rafe's relationship fascinating- but i want their canon relationship to fail so bad#I also hope desperately Toppers girlfriend (first of all gets a name-) does something and doesnt end the season still with him#if they dont become girlfriends then at least theyre becoming besties in my brain#they need to recover from the absolutey fuckery of dating two hyper-repressed and abusive gay men who are NOT into you lol#🪲#obx fandom#obx#obx content#obx season 4#rafe obx#sofia obx#outer banks#topper thornton#Topper thornton's gf#idk lol#GIVE ME HER NAME GOD DAMN IT im excited- shes definitely gonna be a nothing character but im excited for her to slap top and leave lol#rafe outer banks#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron obx
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#just saw someone suggesting that ''everything being a disorder today'' stems from wanting a scientific explanation as to why theyre#different from everyone else and that desire itself stems at least partly from neoliberalism and individualism and wanting to be special#and buying into the facades of neoliberalism#and i get what theyre trying to say#but#my guy#your explanation was in context of things like chronic pain disorders and d/Deafness and autism and allergies#which most definitely do not stem from that. like i would still be autistic and still have chronic pain if i was not in a neoliberal society#neoliberal ideals are not the cause of my functional neurological disorder#neoliberalism isnt causing my peripheral nervous system to not work properly#i understand the argument youre trying to make and it definitely applies in some cases#but do not come into disabled spaces sprouting that shite#you know why i seeked a diagnosis for my chronic pain issues? because different chronic pain disorders can be treated differently#theres no point giving ne anti inflammatory meds for my fibromyalgia#and actually i do need the meds i take for my fnd because they reduce my nerve pain enough for me to function as a person#i didnt want a name for it so i could certify that i was an individual and not like everyone else#i wanted a name for it because i was in pain and i was suffering and i wanted medical treatment for it and i wanted an explanation as to why#i was in pain all the damn time
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hi les mis anon from a while back here!!! not sure if u remember the ask i sent but i kept meaning to reply and kept forgetting haha but i just wanted to thank you for ur reply and i’d love to know if u have any les mis blog recs and how ur fic is coming along. hope u enjoyed the rec i sent and have a good day!
anon. "not sure if u remember my ask" darling. i literally thought about you today like hm. maybe i should make a post @ les mis anon to tell them that i thoroughly enjoyed the fic they recced me ? idk it's probably weird so i won't and then you messaged me ???? what are you? some kind of psychic? anyways thanks again for sending me that link reading les mis fic for the first time in a while really reminded me why i started writing mine in the first place which is why i'm currently at a cafe (not very actively) writing on it.
i don't really follow many les mis blogs either which is sad and i don't even know if there still exist any that only post about les mis but i'll take this as an opportunity to tag my lovely mutuals who i know are in the fandom and post about les mis at least occasionally (if y'all have any blog recs for this lovely anon (and me) pls feel free to @ them or if i forgot to mention anyone (which i definitely did) just @ yourself so anon and/or i can follow you) so here they are in no particular order @ophvlia @enjolraspermettendo @cumbercookiebatchs @protectcosette @juliensorelisoverparty @enjscurls @frhog @a-little-fall-of-pain @combe-ferres @captainenjolras @pumpkinspice-prouvaire @a-heart-full-of-dumb @lesbienj
i hope you have a wonderful day sweetheart and i hope i could help
#anon you're back!!! heyyyyy !!!! i hope you have / had a great day too#also if you don't like being called by pet names please tell me i just have so much love to give#also hello friends don't mind me mentioning you to this anon i hope y'all still like and post about les mis bc i KNOW you used too but idk#if you still do??? also damn i really need more les mis on my dash so this is absolutely self serving#les mis anon#ask tag#anon ask
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Me using humor to disguise the fact that I am telling them how to do it correctly because customers can get so defensive if I point out they don’t know how to use their card’s new tap feature, and I kinda have to say something because they will get frustrated and start jousting at the reader with their card, and we just got new card-readers that actually work and I am not about to let someone break my brand-new easy-to-use card-reader just because they don’t want to admit that they have no idea how it works and need to be helped at least once to figure it out: “It’s more of a sit that a tap, haha.”
#my autism gets overly attached to tools. especially ones that are overlooked or damaged or need maitenece.#I maybe accidentally named one of our broken shopping carts Hamburger (cos hes smashed but he’s still okay-ish) and it’s#still referred to as Hamburger and when it goes missing people say ‘who fucking took hamburger again.’#one time I found hamburger way in the very back of the warehouse (not with the Too Broken To Use carts; it was just left in the back with#some stuff in it someone forgot to put up) so on my lunch break I went and put up the stuff and then wheeled ol Hamburger all the#way to the back room where I kept it. I did use it! there’s always one or two shopping carts back there for moving product around. I just#had a peculiar one that I befriended and perhaps there was a time when my mental capacity to not quit was indeed held together only by Hamb#Hamburger’s rusty and squashed frame.#ANYWAYS. I love my card readers 🥺 I love the broken ones and the new ones.#the new ones have a very fatal flaw: older cards are a little thicker so they need a tiiiiny extra nudge to fully insert. and oh my god.#I have to walk on eggshells to explain that. because if i don’t explain they will decide to shove the card like they think it’s a carnival#game of ‘how hard can you push this? are you strong enough to win the stuffed cat for your girlfriend?’#so far it works if I just…very…slowly…hover my hand over to their card…and very lightly nudge it. and then I make SURE to say.#‘I appreciate you being gentle with it#it’s new and actually works really well compared to our old ones and I don’t want someone to break it pushing too hard; so thank you.’#and I’m so sympathetic to the card reader 😭 like DAMN. I couldn’t read your card either if you slapped it against my eyeball for half a sec#like it needs a moment to scan. like an eyeball. just set it in range and it will beep when it’s finished. it’ll take a full second or maybe#even two or three. but it’s going to take even longer if you start whacking your card on it and then give up and put the chip in and then it#has to show the errror message and then reset and then try to scan the chip and hopefully you found some patience for that otherwise you#took your card out already and are now staring at me like I’m an irresponsible Card Reader Handlef#for not properly training my equipment to work.#sorrrrrry for rambling!!!#sorenhoots#wait this is my post. not sorries.
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there is suddenly a piece missing from one of my teeth 🥲
#need to schedule a damn dentist appointment#i still choose to believe the conspiracy theory i made up that dentists intentionally give people cavities#so fuck the dentist for doing this to me im going to a different dentist that wont ask my preferred name and then still deadname me
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Simon doesn't think he's ever tasted something so good in his fuckin' life before.
He didn't know what he was in for this time when he got back from deployment, and nicotine and whiskey ain't got shit on this. Poor bastard can't remember the last time he had something so good invade his senses like this.
You said you had a treat for him, made him lay down, and promptly sat on his face, and Simon was fuckin' gone. Don't know what the fuck possessed him but he took one whiff and was instantly hooked.
Simon feasted on your cunt like a man starved. Tongue, lips, fingers, you name it. Anything to get his fix, anything to make you moan.
Anything to make you cum.
Didn't let up for shit, not even to breathe, and when you voiced your concern while whimpering and trembling, Simon didn't give a fuck and still continued to love on your pretty cunt because where the bloody fuck are you going?
Shut up. Shut the hell up and let him make you cum, sweetheart.
Actions have consequences. Shouldn't have made him feel so bloody good, shouldn't have poked at the beast, and he'd be damned if he didn't think this was the best post-deployment gift he's ever gotten. Better than the nicotine high or occasional pity wank.
Fuck, it's been so long and he's absolutely disgusting about it.
And Simon's aware of it all, the way his cock is so hard it's bloody painful and leaking in his pants, the way you're grinding on his face, smothering it and fucking his mouth (don't you dare stop, either), and how his everything is consumed by you. You coat his stubble, fill his nostrils up with your scent, his tastebuds are fired up—bloody hell, need he explain more?
Simon could die a happy man right now, and what would his gravestone say? Here Lies Simon Riley, Died Eating Cunt.
He'd chuckle if he wasn't too busy at the moment. Shit, he probably did if the way you're moaning is any indication. That felt good, didn't it, sweetheart?
It's your turn now to say his name like a prayer and believe in him just as he believes in you.
And it's the best fucking thing to ever bless his ears.
--
Turning Simon Out: Part I and Part II.
#turning simon out series.#nsfw.#cutie 𝓠.#call of duty#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty modern whorefare.#simon ghost riley#simon riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#call of duty x reader#call of duty x you#cod x reader#cod x you#x black reader#x poc reader#x plus size reader#x gn!reader#task force 141
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Jack walking into the british for a perdón when they know he has their money AAAAAAHHHHHHH
#jack is named john????? omg#WHAT DID YOU EXPECG MY GUY!!!! NOW ANNE IS ALL ALONEE!!!#GAG HIM FLINT!!!!!!! CHARLES STAND UUUUUUP!!!!#coward.... pussy.....#charles telling flint he cant win... he is crazy you dont understand#i dont care that you shook my hand#charles is still a slave.... to teach at least#after he was to eleanor.... yeah#son lost..... damn#YEAAAAAHHHHHH JACK GOT HIM!!!!#anne bonny must be found... telling that to the scissor sisters..... MAX DO NOOOT BEND!!!#vane and flint need to move FAST!!! poor anne being the only one to defend that#talking tag#watching black sails#just noticed my typo HAHAHA a pardon.... the spanish arent there yet and they will NOT be giving perdones
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I updated my Paradox Pokémon UNITE tier list meme. Most notable updates: I would no longer be (too) disappointed if Mascara Dragon (Raging Bolt) and Sci-Fi Goat (Iron Crown) were added before their cooler (Gouging Fire and Iron Boulder) or prettier (Walking Wake and Iron Leaves) trio members; I saw a very cute photo of a plush penguin sitting on ice two days ago and then a cute drawing of Iron Bundle’s head (with big round eyes) yesterday so I’ll admit Bundle wouldn’t be a major disappointment and I’d probably have to main it if it joined; I’m no longer judging how much I want them in UNITE based on how well I can imagine them scoring a goal (which resulted in only Flutter Mane, Koraidon and the Proto Beasts out of the Past Paradox Pokémon being high up)
I say disappointment I just mean I’d be sad that they weren’t prioritising the Proto Beasts and Neo Swords because I’m obsessed. I love all the Future Paradox Pokémon and most of the Past Paradox Pokémon
#out of all the names I could’ve given Bolt as a joke I chose “Mascara Dragon” even though it’s a dinosaur that looks like a giraffe#btw it has grown on me again - seemingly mainly because of the “mascara” - but it’s still my third-favourite Proto Beast#and I still prefer Crown (my third-favourite Neo Sword)#damn I want the Proto Beasts and Neo Swords in UNITE I need to see them in Holowear#give Fire and Boulder leather jackets and give Crown some kind of suit (blazer and tie included) that would be funny#paradox pokémon#tier list meme#paradox Pokémon tier list meme#pokémon
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I cannot overstate the value of native 'weeds' and green manure practices. I've been having fantastic luck with my vegetable garden because I've let the native smartweed, goldenrod and falsenettle just go ahead and grow instead of picking every piece out, and then I just go in and lazily pluck out the pieces that are getting a bit too big for their britches every once in a while and let them fall where they stood; I even bring in clippings from around the yard to sprinkle in there, too. The result is my plants have protected roots, more water retention, more valuable mulch decomposing around them, and when I do need to clear a spot, there's only the easy-to-deal-with weeds in the way. Plus some of them make for great animal fodder! I don't have to remove everything I didn't plant, only pluck the tops by hand every now and again, and even if the weeds weren't giving back nutrition by decomposing, I have more nutrients than I know what to do with anyway because I have two compost areas and a worm bin inside (get a worm bin, seriously, they're great, and can fit under a sink)
I highly recommend checking your area for master gardener guilds, because they can be a wealth of information, plus a great resource for acquiring native species that are hard to find. Natives are better in literally every way; the only non-natives I have anymore are edible or larger pieces I keep for other utility or nostalgia.
Imagine if baking bread was a skill any person living independently in their own house needed to have at least a passing familiarity with, so there were endless books, blogs and websites about how to bake bread, but none of them seemed to contain the most basic facts about how bread actually works.
You would go online and find questions like "Help, I put my bread in the oven, and it GOT BIGGER!" and instead of saying anything about bread naturally rises when you put yeast in it, the results would be advertising some kind of $970 device that punches the bread while it's baking so it doesn't rise.
Even the most reliable, factually grounded sources available would have only the barest scraps of information on the particularities of ingredients, such as how different types of flour differ and produce different results, or how yeast affects the flavor profile of bread. Rice flour, barley flour, potato flour and amaranth flour would be just as common as wheat flour, but finding sources that didn't treat them as functionally identical would be near impossible. At the same time, websites and books would list specific brands of flour in bread recipes, often without specifying anything else.
An unreasonable amount of people would be hellbent on doing something like baking a full-sized loaf of bread in under 3 minutes, and would regularly bake bread to charred cinders at 700 degrees in an attempt to accomplish this, but instead of gently telling people that their goal is not realistic, books claiming to be general resources would be framed entirely around the goal of baking bread as fast as possible, with entire chapters devoted to making the charred bread taste like it isn't charred.
Anyway, this is what landscaping is like.
#the bane of my existence is non-native shrubs idiots planted because 'ooh shrub'#chinese privet has become an emergency in my area because of how prevalent it is even in undisturbed areas#going on crusades against it has been valuable for me though; it makes for decent wattle after some processing#and I've been pleased to uncover lots of neat natives#we have some pretty healthy populations of the endangered american elm and redbay now; and the redbay is delicious#not to mention lots of ferns; lizardtail; wild grape; wild blueberry; wild blackberry#I use the plantnet app for id'ing things and it's led to many wonderful discoveries about natives#and lets me know I don't have to bother removing a lot of stuff#like the creeper that apparently can be cultivated to grow on houses on purpose#because it climbs using sticky pads instead of damaging with tendrils#so now we're just letting that go and it's insulating the house#the only thing really giving me trouble now is this weird invasive shit in the yard that probably wormed in on birdseed#I don't remember the name but it's a cordage plant that gets waist-high if allowed and is damn near impossible to pull up#I've made some headway clipping it in bulk and teaching the dogs to pull it up but it's still kinda overwhelming#hopefully I have a new secret weapon; The Goose#she was still rather small when the stuff bloomed last year and while the animals are disinterested in the leaves they seem to be ok with#the flowers#so hopefully this lean mean and long eating machine can keep seed spread from being a problem#anyway#yeah#natives are the best and get birds and worms#I don't even need to turn the compost because the chickens do it already#also I been experimenting with growing fullsun plants in part shade and planting edibles in weird places or upside down in hanging pots#and it all seems to be working good!#I probably have literally 2 dozen tomatoes in random places now#I keep trimming them and dumping the trimmings in pots and they keep growing
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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I always pick the WORST characters to latch onto AAAAAAAA
#me.txt#mentally i am here#i need to stop trusting writers who write tragic characters just to kill them off in the end for dramatic effect#it happens every time 💀#but the dragon half blood was done SO dirty that i literally dropped the whole damn light novels adfghjk#even tho i was like.. 500 chapters in 🫠#Cale is just so POS despite knowing this guy's circumstances. and he didn't even give the guy an actual name???#like we are literally still calling him Dragon Half Blood?? 😭😭😭#get OUT of here and your zero tolerance i HATE YOUYU AAA
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Government name vs Military callsign
Prompt: What scares them worse? Addressing them by their full government name, or addressing them by their military callsign?
Featuring: Task Force 141 (CoD: MW2) - John Price, Simon "Ghost" Riley, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Johnny "Soap" MacTavish (separately) x GN!Reader
Word Count: 0.9k
Warnings: none
John Price
Government name.
Calling him Captain or Skipper just ends with him sauntering to where ever you are and ask (in an obnoxiously self-satisfied voice) what you wanted. Like a cat pretending it can’t hear the urgency in your tone when you say to get off the counter.
“If you want me to ‘shake a leg’, call my name, luvie.”
Now if you holler “Jonathan Price”, he’ll drop something. Either the newspaper in his hands, or his heart into his stomach. He sure as hell moves his ass with a purpose, and he’s peering into the room with an apology on his lips.
“Yes, luv? What’s wrong, poppet?”
“Lift the other end of the couch, would you?”
He does, and you shimmy it further back in the room. “Anything else I can do, love o’ my life?” He’s hovering, and gently coaxing you into his arms. Gauging how mad you were at him. You curled into him and kissed his chin. Then stepped away with a pat to his chest.
“No, sweetheart, just wanted you to shake a leg is all.”
When he remembers your previous conversation, he groans and tells you to fuck off.
Simon Riley
Military callsign.
When you two are alone, and he’s already given you permission to call him Simon, don’t call him Ghost. When you say that word, he assumes one of his mates are at the door or on the phone, and goes from Simon to Ghost. Stalks into the room with narrowed eyes, only to find you in the kitchen. By yourself.
“Ghost, you want a sandwich too? Turkey and cheese.”
“Fuck you callin’ me that for?”
Once he sees you’re alone, he swoops in and wraps around you like a hoodie. A firm kiss to your ear, then your cheek, then spun you around. Back pressed to the counter top. Settles his face right close to yours.
“We playin’ games now?” You didn’t want to upset him, so you pressed a kiss to his nose. His grumpy look faded a bit.
“Sorry, baby.” Arms wrapped carefully around his shoulders. And your fingers scratch his scalp. Another kiss to his nose. “I’m sorry for playing games with you. Simon Riley.”
Hearing his name on your lips finally cracked, and he gave you a smile. A little scar on the upper lip. You gave it a kiss, and then pressed a kiss to his lips.
A quick surge forward, and you only just had time to shove aside the things behind you before you found yourself on the countertop.
Kyle Garrick
Government name.
He doesn’t mind being called Gaz, and you’ll use Kyle and Gaz interchangeably. Doesn’t even mind if you use “Kyle” or “honey” in front of his squadmates. Though “Kylie” he does have some displeasure with.
“I’ll have you know, Soap is still calling me Kylie, you asshole.”
Call him ‘Garrick’, and he knows that you are pretending to be mad at him. He slinks over and rubs his face against your cheek. He’s too cute for you to stay mad.
If you shout “Kyle Garrick”, he comes running. He could have sworn that he put his clothes in the hamper. And did the dishes. And taken out the recycling. Damn, what was it that he forgot?
“Kyle Ga-”
“Yes, dear!” Shit, he didn’t mean to ‘yes, dear’ you. “Yes, my dear, I’m right here.”
You pause your laundry folding and summon him with a crook of your finger. Once he’s close enough, you tap your lip with the same finger. “I need a kiss.”
He blinked once. Then twice. “God damn you.” He squishes your face in his hands and gave you a quick, firm kiss. “Don’t stress me out like that. Thought you were mad.”
“Give me another kiss, or I will be.”
He rapid fire kissed your mouth, chin, and cheeks, then gave you a smack on the ass before returning to the living room.
“In my own fucking home,” he muttered.
John MacTavish
Military callsign.
He’s got some thick skin. And he’s had his name shouted angrily many a time. He would all but skip into the room with a big smile on his face. The only people who shouted that name (and wore out the scare-factor on it) were his family members. Shouting “John MacTavish” meant you loved him. You were also mad at him, but you loved him. That was more important. Even with your scowl and the gross pile of garbage he kept forgetting to take out. You loved him.
Now shouting his callsign reminded him of his superior officers.
“SOAP!”
Shit shit shit. He put down his beer and ran from the garage to the backyard. Leg brace over his sweats, low cut muscle shirt that you also wolf-whistle at when he wears. You were only weeding the garden boxes.
“JOHNNY!”
“I’m here, bonnie,” he hollered, rounding the corner. You were sitting in the dirt, a tidy pile of weeds and dead plant bits next to you.
“C’mere, c’mere.”
He leaned down next to you, hand on your shoulder and good knee on the ground. “Wassit?”
You pointed to the leaf in your hand. “A caterpillar, Johnny. An itsy-bitsy caterpillar.”
He sighed heavily and kissed your shoulder. “Bonnie, I thought something was wrong.”
“Hm?” You spared him a glance. “What are you talking about, bubba?”
“You called me Soap.”
“Did I? Didn’t mean to spook you, loverboy.” You gave him an apologetic kiss on the lips. “Just wanted you to see the caterpillar before he wiggled off.”
Posted: 2023 Dec 10
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