#dam break
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It will not be untrue to say that all the industries in current times are coinciding with the environmental field. With the stringent environmental regulations, industries are being pushed to follow methodologies that are more environment friendly. IOT-based systems come into the picture for these analyses and monitoring. Zero waste discharge, recycling, and green approach are a few terminologies that shed light on the qualitative standard of any industry. In this context, mining and metallurgical processes discard the most harmful and toxic waste. Regardless of the toxicity, every industry discharges the wastewater following the regulations where it is being discarded. Water resource management, free-surface flows, and truly multiphase is Paanduv’s expertise.
Scour and sediment transport to model problems like flow through bridge pier, dredging, flows in river beds, and ocean are addressed and modeled with accuracy.
Paanduv’s expertise in truly multiphase systems, free-surface flows, reactions, and chemical kinetics makes us the best candidate for 3D modeling of these processes.
read more about - water and environment
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all i'm saying is that one of them probably had to carry clover's body to that coffin in the castle
edit: read the first tag, thank you
#btw do not follow me for uty fanart /srs I'm not in the fandom anymore and don't post fanart. I just chose violence today#starlo drapes half of his poncho over clover's clammy cold skin#and he doesn't speak the whole journey#cuz he knows if he does the dam will break. and he has to be strong#for everyone#uty fanart#uty#undertale yellow#starlo#clover#tw child death#my art#star sheriff :3
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Happy October 1st! redraw of my post from 2022 :b
https://www.tumblr.com/falseflea/696941838307819520/
#i hope that dam link works ........#breaking bad#brba#breaking bad fanart#brba fanart#walter white#jesse pinkman#falseflea art tag
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chapter 90 vash
#vash the stampede#trigun#trigun maximum#trimax spoilers#trigun spoilers#i forget how the blacklist stuff works on tumblr again... uncertain whether it matters or not for it to be in the caption itself#anyway my mind was reflecting again on the later chapters of trigun :lying down: i'm not sure how to collect my thoughts#but i think all the time about vash's “if i shoot him now she'll die” line in ch 15#and considering vash haven't had long at all to grieve after ch 64... aughh... augh.... mourning both of them in ch 91#vash's emotional state after 64 is really so. It's devastating watching him bc he's still being all smiley around his friends and allies#but when he's alone - charging the bullets and during those first two battles - he's just so quiet#and all of that kept emotion just breaks like a dam in 90... all of that to say.. legato is really incredible dgmks#ruporas art
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i'm thinking about john killing someone in front of his s/o, but that was about to kill them so his violent is seem a protectiveness. to be seem bloody and not be feared....
18+ 2.7k homelander x reader, established relationship, gore, blood, morally grey reader? shower sex, fingering, praise kink, breast play, dirty talk, rough sex, count down, needy/possessive/yandere HL, reader is nondescript with f!anatomy.
Homelander is breathing shallowly, eyes wide—wild—blood dripping from his chin and from the stray strands of hair that fell forward when he lunged. He's elbow deep in a man's sternum, and his other hand is wrapped tight around his broken neck, the bones like fragments of glass poking out from beneath rapidly cooling skin.
It all happened in an instant. One second, the man currently in his hands was grabbing you by the hair, a knife swinging wildly towards your throat, and the next he was dangling from Homelander's grasp, heart slowing against his knuckles.
He laughs through his teeth, licking his lips reflexively. The blood is sour, contaminated with god knows what, but that hardly takes away from the thrill of the moment.
It's been a while since he held the gaze of someone whose life he just claimed. Long enough that he forgets where he is, and who he's with.
He drops the man to the ground like a wet sack of potatoes, innards spilling out from the hole his arm leaves behind. In the man's hand, Homelander sees something that sets his teeth on fucking edge: strands of your hair ripped from your scalp in that limp, dead palm.
"You stupid motherfucker," he growls through a crooked sickly smile, lifting his boot to crush the hand like it were nothing more than an insect. The man's heart has long since stopped, but the rapid pound of another is still loud in his ears.
Yours.
Slowly, he turns around to look at you. You're cradling your skull where you'd been grabbed, tears gathering in your wide glassy eyes, the shock of it all catching up to you. You're staring intently at the corpse, watching blood pooling out from beneath it.
You've never looked at him with fear in your eyes before, but that's precisely what he sees when your eyes meet his. It makes him bristle internally. What was he supposed to do? You were in danger, and the way you screamed will follow him into his nightmares.
He could have lost you just now. You could be the one soaking in a puddle of your own blood, losing your life to the press of nothing more than a flimsy metal blade. While Homelander has always been logically aware of your humanity and the tender vulnerability that entails, nothing has ever put it so viscerally in the forefront of his mind as a freak incident coming so close to erasing you from his life.
He did what he had to. You'll understand. You have to understand.
"Hey," he says, hands raised to you placatingly, as if coaxing a spooked wild animal. The blood just makes his crimson gloves look glossy. He blocks your view of the body. "Hey, it's alright."
Your terror is palpable in the race of your heart and the sour smell of adrenaline coursing through you.
He reaches for you with the hand that isn't drenched in viscera, but before he can take hold, you beat him to the punch, throwing yourself into his arms, your own wrapping tight around his middle, hands clasping together beneath his cape.
Caught off guard, Homelander's arms hover awkwardly for a beat before he returns your embrace. He'd been certain that he was the source of your fear after a display like that.
"He just-he tried to kill me," you rasp, tears overflowing, spilling down your cheeks, wetting his suit further. "Yeah, yeah he sure did. S'alright, he's not gonna hurt you again," he coos, stroking your back with one bloodied hand, the other cupping the back of your neck. He kisses the top of your head as you cry, working the shock and fear from your system. "Ssshhh, shhshh."
Looking over his shoulder once, he lifts you up into his arms and takes off gently into the night sky, keeping you gathered close as he flies, carrying you far away from the mess spilled all over the pavement.
Not his problem. His focus is you.
With your face buried in the crook of his neck, he can feel your tears rolling down into the collar of his suit, can smell the sea salt sweetness of them. He's never let you see that side of him before. When the shock wears off, will you see the moment for what it was?
Will you realize how much he enjoyed it?
Landing on his balcony, your arms are still tight around his neck. Neither of you have said a word since take off. He's not sure where your head is, other than the fact your racing heart has slowed to a more natural—albeit still nervous—patter.
Inside, he sets you down gently on your feet. Your balance wavers, and he settles you with his hands on your hips, staining your clothing with smears of dark blood.
He's almost afraid of breaking the tenuous quiet, but he needs to know where your head is. When you glance away, are you looking towards the door, planning your escape?
His hands tighten reflexively on your hips, and your eyes spring back up to meet his.
"You okay?" He asks quietly, warily.
"Yeah," you say, though it's hardly convincing.
"You're in shock," he says, touching the side of your face. Enough of the blood has been wiped on your clothes that it doesn't transfer much to your skin. "You remember what happened?"
Maybe your distress will leave you malleable enough for him to shape the incident just right. Make sure that you remember first and foremost that- "You saved me," you say, cutting his thoughts short. "That man was trying to hurt me, and you... you saved me."
His brows lift, surprised to hear you say it first. "Yeah. Course I did."
"You were so..." You trail off, gaze moving along his features.
Apprehension prickles from his spine all the way up to the back of his neck. He's accustomed to being scolded for his brutality by Madelyn, or looked on with thinly veiled disgust by Maeve.
They're both long gone from his life now, yet he finds himself waiting with bated breath for your response, his throat tight under the gripping hands of the ghosts of his past.
"Amazing," you exhale, banishing his specters with the sweeping wind of your breath. "God, I've never been that scared in my life, but you reacted so fast. No one has ever protected me like you do," you say, cupping his blood spattered face in your palms, smearing it into thin pink swaths across his skin with your thumbs.
He breaks into a slow, pleased smile. "Well, you've never been with anyone like me before."
"No," you agree. He can still feel a slight tremor in your hands, your body still coming down from the adrenaline high. "And I never will."
That strokes his ego deliciously. He likes the finality in your voice, the dreamy way you're looking at him, even as the smell of blood hangs heavily in the air. He almost kisses you before he remembers he's got the blood of some random thug all over his face.
"I need a shower," he says, lips close enough that his breath teases yours.
"Me too. Guess we'll have to share," you say, feigning resignation.
He grins. "Uh oh."
In the bathroom, Homelander makes quick work of undressing, but you're faster. You're already in the large shower, steaming water pouring down from above. He steps in with you, letting the water wash over you both. The water turns pink as it carries the blood away, and then sudsy as you both soap and shampoo the mess of the day from you bodies.
Once he's rinsed, he slips in behind you, wrapping his arms around you and nuzzling into the crook of your neck. "I love you," he says at your ear, trailing kisses down to the lobe, to your neck. He loves the feel of goosebumps rising against his lips.
"I love you, too," you respond as you have a thousand times before. Maybe more. He stopped counting when he was sure you'd never stop.
"How much?" He prompts, hungry for more. Your praise and assurance after a moment of such uncertainty has only made him desperate for more. He wants to wring more pretty words of admiration from you, hear more of just how good he is to you.
He can't help but color your answer with a slip of his hand between your thighs, toying with your clit.
The touch earns a shivering sigh from you. "So much. More than I can stand sometimes," you say, leaning your head back against his shoulder.
"I thought you'd be scared of me after seeing what you saw... What I'm capable of," he murmurs, pillowing the reminder with deft, wet fingers. "Are you?"
You shake your head. "No, m'not, mmm... You'd never hurt me," you say, breath hitching as his fingers slip in further, fingertips stroking the lips of your pussy.
"Never," he echoes, his other hand slotting over your throat just to feel each noise you make. He pulls you back flush to his body, presses his hardening cock to the curve of your ass with his a shaky groan. "I liked it," you admit quieter, moaning when he slides his middle finger inside you. The confession stirs something primal in him, makes him growl out a rough little noise against your skin, grinding his cock into you.
"I wanted to rip his fucking guts out for touching you," he says, working another finger into you, savoring the slick, velvet feel of you around them. "For trying to take you from me." His words make your cunt quiver. He can't help himself, has to pull them from you just to taste you, sucking the nectarine sweet flavor from his fingers, rolling his tongue between them, hungry for every ounce of it.
He moans around his own fingers when you reach back and take his cock firmly in your hand, jerking him slowly. "I want you inside me," you say, your legs spreading slightly, back arching into him. "Touch me until yours is the only one I remember."
Fuck. Yes, that he can do.
You let go of his cock, and he wraps an arm around your waist, guiding himself between your wet, soft thighs. You close your legs, earning a breathy noise from him as he rocks between them, the warm, wet heat of your cunt a tease along the top of his cock.
"Take me," he murmurs fervently at your ear. "Wanna be in you, feel you, fuck you, make your pussy mine."
Shuddering against him, you reach down between your legs. Pressing your fingers to the underside of his cock, you push it up as he moves forward, the thick head of it catching on your entrance and splitting you open in one long, slow thrust.
Christ, you're so fucking tight. He can feel your muscles contracting, flexing, pulling him deeper. Your cunt feels made for him.
No one will ever take you away from him.
His right hand goes across your chest, cupping your left breast and rolling your nipple between his thumb and index finger while he braces you tighter to him. He rolls his hips slowly at first, relishing the tight, slippery pull of your cunt before he begins to pick up a proper pace.
"Feels good, doesn't it?" He grits out, the slap of naked skin against skin loud in the shower. "Tell me how good it feels."
"Feels like being fucked by the fucking sun," you moan, gripping his arms, useless for anything other than taking his cock when he holds you like this. "Hot, you're so hot inside me, and I can feel... I can feel you holding back, it's like you're vibrating," you say, voice catching with every solid thrust. "It's like... it's like getting as much as I can take from something so much bigger than me."
He doesn't know what he expected to hear, but it isn't that. The idea that you can feel the true gravity of his power behind each restrained thrust drives him wild, makes him want to give you more, but he knows he can't. Not without breaking you. Sweet, frail, human thing that you are.
If he could, he would break you apart, fuck you until you fall to pieces in his hands, and then he would put every single fragment back where it belongs, but he can't. If he breaks you, he will lose you.
He needs you to survive him.
"Fuck, fuck," he rasps, holding you that slight bit tighter, lifting you nearly off your feet as he arches his back, lifting and dropping you onto every thrust of his hips. "M'gonna come," he says, voice reedy. "Come with me, let me feel you. I know you're close, can fuckin' feel it. Touch yourself for me, sweetheart."
Immediately, you drop a hand to your clit, the tips of your fingers brushing where he's pounding into you. The touch must be electric because you jolt against him. "I am, I am," you whine, rubbing yourself, the pleasure making you squirm.
"M'gonna count us down, alright? And you, mmmgh, you're gonna come with me," he says, already fighting to hold himself back. Your cunt is only getting tighter the closer to release you get, making it hard for him to stay focused.
"Five... four," he manages to say, desperately holding onto his final tethers of control. You're beyond speech now, reduced to nothing more than desperate, needy noises as you finger your clit, not even bothering to try and hold yourself up while Homelander mercilessly bounces you on his cock,
"Three... two..." His words are strained, balls drawn up tight, cock throbbing in the slick grip of your cunt. He needs to come so bad it makes his toes curl, but he won't let go until he feels you coming undone.
"One..."
One, two, three more thrusts, and you're screaming his name, knees curling up, your whole body tightening like a vice. The spasm of your orgasm rips his clean out of him, has him gasping into the crook of your neck.
He comes so hard his vision goes white, every movement halting, his focus purely on the ardent pounds of his cock emptying deep inside you, flooding you so thoroughly that the excess spill back down his shaft, his balls, mingling with the hot water and making him shiver from head to toe.
When he can, he takes in a deep, shuddering breath, easing his hold on you, though not by much. You're all but limp in his arms, panting, head lolled back against his shoulder. He lets the water run on the two of you a little while longer, savoring the aftershocks of your release before gingerly slipping out of you.
Carefully, he rubs the water between your thighs, tenderly cleaning you, kissing your neck, your shoulder.
"That was..." You trail off, words half slurred, and then you just laugh softly, the marvel clear in your voice.
He laughs, too, his own voice frayed. "Sure was."
The two of you put as much effort as it takes to get dry before making your way to bed, slipping beneath the cool sheets and rapidly warming them with your bodies, Homelander's in particular. He's always run hot, and you seem extra appreciative for it tonight, wrapping your arms around his waist and snuggling into his arms.
"I love you," you mumble sweetly.
Homelander draws the covers up over your shoulders before slipping his arm around you, drawing you into the warm, safe circle of his arms. "And I love you," he purrs, gently rolling his knuckles up and down your back.
You look peaceful, he thinks, watching as you begin to drift to sleep. He's sure it helps that he wore you out so thoroughly, but still, he'd anticipated that the shock of the evening would still have you worked up. It could be that you're still processing, that the trauma will return in nightmares that follow you into the night.
Maybe the threat of a rat simply makes less of an impact when you're cradled in the jaws of a lion.
Regardless, should you sleep fitfully or peacefully, he will be here.
No force in this would can keep him from you.
#homelander x you#homelander x reader#i blacked out and wrote 85% of this yesterday#i desperately wanted to finish it but had plans fghjkl#anyways wow! a brief reprieve from my writers block?? a temporary break in the dam????#i had so much fun writing this either way#thank you for sending this!!#not proofread we die like men#my writing#darling anon#ask and you shall receive#smut
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he wants his picture taken too,,,
I forgot that the beach scene exists and suddenly my neuron activated
while I was drawing this, I forgot so many details so if you notice anything….. no you didn’t
Also we stand for buff as hell wukong in this house
#dam niki ur bobbies#Ná never catching a break#art stuff#lego monkie kid#lmk#lmk sun wukong#sun wukong#monkie kid#lmk monkey king#lmk oc#monkey king#lmk oc x canon#oc x canon#sun wukong x oc
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AGATHA CHRISTIE'S POIROT 12x03 "Murder on the Orient Express"
#poirot#hercule poirot#agatha christie#david suchet#tvedit#perioddramaedit#tvandfilm#userstream#cinematv#poirotedit#*edit#poirot 12x03: murder on the orient express#top level acting that breaks your heart#just like poirot's soul is breaking#*hugs poirot*#an extraordinary moment here with david#poirot this vulnerable? you're GLUED to the screen#he is almost surprised by his feelings at first#and then the dam breaks#it's haunting yet beautiful
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Trust me, once you hear your own giggles start to slip out, it will tickle so much more-
#twordpinion#tword community#tickle community#ticklepinion#tword content#tickling#it's like your brain's defenses just shut down and the giggles become more frequent and then the dam breaks#and the sensations are so unbelieveably ticklish the gall you have thinking you could hold it in#just laugh for me I promise you'll love it
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Y’all not to be horny on main but eluciens sex scenes have the potential to be life-changing.
They have been fighting off this bond for what, 2 years now?? Imagine what’ll happen when they finally give in.
#the yearning??#the pining??#when that dam breaks it better sweep me away#elucien#pro elucien#lucien vanserra#pro lucien vanserra#elain x lucien#sjmaas#elain archeron#anti elriel
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daughters of the evening
⭒⭒⭒⭒ in which luke’s descent from good may be found.
pairing: luke castellan x (fem) reader
a/n: hey guys!! first fic in a while and i know, i know, pjo book readers are disappointed in me… but i’m just a girl! i’m literally just a girl! please enjoy my brain baby i love her :) i love writing quests so much, so this was really nice to write for my first fic back on tumblr. i hope you guys enjoy! if anybody wants to be added to my pjo taglist, let me know!
warnings: canon typical violence, book spoilers, blood/injury description, rusty writing
words: 5.8K ⭒⭒⭒⭒
(y/n) couldn’t remember when the change in Luke became permanent.
She could remember the hints of something at the corners of his eyes, something that bit at the happiness that filled them, eating away at it like rot on wood. She could remember the slow decline in his respect for his father, respect that had barely been there for years, though was now bridging on outright disrespect.
She could remember the crux of it all, the very moment in which all of the little things began to coalesce into something ugly. A flash of claws, the deep scarlet of mortal blood followed by shimmering gold ichor. The horrible sound of screaming. Gleaming fruits of gold. Gorgeous, blooming green trees towering above them that concealed the violence below.
It was after the quest that Luke, her Luke, was never the same.
⭒⭒
“I don’t remember San Francisco looking like this.”
Luke’s lips curled into a smile. “You’ve never been to San Francisco.”
(y/n) rolled her eyes. “I’ve seen it in movies through which I have lived vicariously. It’s in one of the Indiana Jones’s, right? Looks different.”
“Those movies are from the eighties,” Luke said. “So, yeah, it’s going to look different.”
Charles Beckendorf, their questmate, heaved a sigh. “Do you guys ever stop?”
“Stop what?” (y/n) asked.
“Being annoying? Flirting? Whatever you want to call it.”
Her face felt awfully hot and she found herself unable to even look in Luke’s general direction. It was a comment that had been made many times in the past, one she was sure Luke was sick to death of, but she found herself yearning for comments like it. They meant that maybe she wasn’t dreaming up something between them.
Either way, she didn’t acknowledge it, rather stuffing her hand into her unzipped backpack and scrounging around until finally she found what she wanted. With a dramatic flair, she revealed three paper maps, each embellished with their names written in colourful pen at the top.
A moment of silence, then Luke said, “Why do we need a map each? Can’t we just share? And where did you even get those?”
“I got them back in Salt Lake City, before we happened upon that massive crab, you remember the one? All blue and slimy.” She pressed the maps into their hands. “There are multiple because knowing you both, you’ll lose them and I’m not buying any more. But, look! They’re colour-coded. Green for me because, duh, Demeter. Orange for Beckendorf, red for you. We can at least make this quest for some stupid apples interesting.”
Beckendorf raised a brow, giving her a strange look. “With glittery gel pen?”
“Glittery gel pen makes everything better,” she insisted. “I’m glad you acknowledge that. Now, come on. With all this talking you two have been doing, we don’t have much time to spare. You’re like a pair of gossiping grannies.”
The two shared a look over her head, one they thought she didn’t see, but it only made her hold back a laugh. They were a relatively upbeat group as it was, but she prided herself on keeping the mood light, especially when danger was looming. With the might of glittery gel pens, a travel-size game of Monopoly, and a cheesy puns book they had picked up off the side of the road, they would be unstoppable should their enemies need a good laugh.
It wasn’t that they weren’t capable of what was ahead of them that she felt the need to joke around, it was just her regular nerves. The three of them were experienced and powerful demigods, skilled fighters and strategists, the best of the best. Luke had his immense skill with a sword and the mind of a trickster; Beckendorf had the brains and strength of a blacksmith, and could sense a trap a mile away and disarm it in moments; (y/n) herself was a powerful daughter of Demeter and, though not to the standard of Luke, was also skilled with a sword.
They hadn’t faced much trouble before. They were a tried-and-tested trio, having been on multiple quests together in the past and finding themselves working well together.
This time, it seemed like a match made by the Fates. A quest ordained by Hermes, Luke’s father, to retrieve the Apples of Immortality from the Garden of the Hesperides - gardens and plants being the domain of Demeter and, by extension, (y/n). And, no doubt, there would be many traps or the need for a strong mind, hence Beckendorf. He was a year or two younger than she and Luke, but had proved himself upon countless occasions. She trusted him with her life.
Almost a week now they’d been on this quest, and still she felt like a giddy child. Almost seventeen and, at her big age, she was holding back smiles and giggles befitting of a schoolgirl with a crush. Part of it was gratefulness that a demigod such as Luke had chosen her to join him on this quest, even after being friends for years and having gone on numerous quests together already. Part of it was simply that she was madly in love with the boy.
She glanced at him from the corner of her eye, then, watching the way the afternoon sun gleamed on his face, setting his dark eyes alight with flame. There was a curious smile on his lips, one that concealed mischief and intelligence; one she had loved for as long as she could remember. His hair was messy after days of travelling and not bothering to fuss with it - she dreaded to think of what her own looked like, the only mirror she had being her sword - but there was something so extremely endearing about it. Wild curls that gave his lightly-freckled face even more life.
Their maps didn’t help their hunt for the Garden an awful lot. For what had to have been at least two hours, they stumbled around the city, turning this way and that, earning odd looks from strangers.
“For being the son of the god of travellers,” (y/n) said, “you are horrendous at reading a map.”
Luke gave her a nudge with his elbow as he scanned the map. He was grinning. Her stomach was doing cartwheels. “Maps make sense enough, but I think these ones are out of date.”
“Maps don’t go out of date, stupid.”
Beckendorf was holding back a smile. “I think he’s right. I think our maps are too old.”
(y/n) glowered at them, plucking their maps from their hands. Fine. They didn’t deserve to hold maps graced with her glittery gel pens anyways.
“Well,” she said. “Unless either of you have any ideas, we’re going to be stuck wandering for hours. Come on, Luke. Use your magicky journey powers. They got us this far.”
His eyes shone, and her knees felt a little weak. She loved it when he looked at her like that, when she had said something funny. It was as though the heavens themselves had descended and flooded his face with light and beauty. She couldn’t look away.
“It’s a big garden,” he retorted. “Find the big garden, daughter of the mighty Demeter!”
She knew he meant it as a joke - the sarcasm was practically dripping from his voice - but there was something in his tone that she couldn’t identify. Something deeper than a simple sarcastic comment. This had been a pity quest, of sorts, she knew. Luke had been getting restless and his father had wanted to satiate him, but it wasn’t enough. He was displeased with the gods, to say the least.
But he kept a good lock on his expressions, on his words. She wouldn’t have suspected a thing had she not known him as well as she knew the feeling of grass beneath her feet.
Eventually, combining their powers and the single brain cell that seemed to be taken by Beckendorf, they found their way to the Mount Tamalpais State Park, which was not open to visitors now that the sun was setting.
They stared up at the distant mountain, the sloping greenland and towering trees that led towards it, and heaved a synonymous groan. Quests could never be even slightly easy, it seemed. Why would the gods let them head to a random park in the city when they could have them trespassing in a state park at night, lives in the hands of the monsters and animals alike that roamed the woods? The gods would rather have them arrested than have something be easy.
“You’re kidding, right?” Beckendorf said. “We don’t have to walk all that way?”
(y/n) frowned. She wished more than anything that they could just turn around and leave, a feeling she did not often get on quests. But something didn’t feel right. There was a twist in her gut, a deep intuition that told her something was going to go wrong.
But her gut was also pulling her towards the mountain. There was a power there, unlike any she had felt before, and she wanted to know what it was.
“We’ll be fine,” she insisted, though she didn’t feel entirely sure herself.
She was the first to make the step towards their darkening fates. If she had known the outcome, she would have turned and fled immediately.
The three of them trudged up the path, flicking on torches when the sky grew darker and the ground in front of them too hard to see. It gave them an eerie glow, entirely unlike the warm glow of their weapons. All of their features were in stark contrast to the dark surroundings; Luke’s cheekbones, Beckendorf’s eyes, her brownbone. It was disconcerting, and it felt all too much like they were the lead characters in a ghost story.
She was considering turning back about halfway there. The tug in her gut was becoming stronger, almost unbearable, and her head was pounding, filled with the worry of the possible incidents that had not happened yet.
The only thing that kept her going was Luke’s pinky finger wrapped around hers.
Maybe he felt her nerves, so acute that she feared her sinews and tendons and bones could snap at any moment. But Luke knew her. He had known her since they were barely teenagers. He knew her better than she knew herself: every habit she had; every face she made; every hint of a feeling before she knew it was coming. He had some deep understanding of her, one that would have made her feel vulnerable in any other situation with any other person. Luke was not any other person.
His pinky was wrapped around hers tightly, warmer than the rest of her body put together. It curled around hers just so, acknowledging her worry. His jacket sleeve brushed hers.
It wasn’t until they reached the Garden at the foot of the mountain that his hand wrapped around hers fully, encasing it entirely in warmth and comfort. His palms were calloused, fingers ribbed with light scars, but she could not imagine it any other way.
The Garden of the Hesperides was easily the most beautiful place she had ever seen and was likely the most beautiful place she would ever see. Stars hung above them in the night sky, glittering so brightly it was as though they could reach out and touch them with their outstretched fingers. Lush green grass coated the ground beneath their feet and beyond, speckled with flowers so bright they almost glowed in the dark. It was bristling with life, so full of it that (y/n) could feel it all deep in her bones.
But the source of the power lay further afield.
A tree, much taller than the rest, stood at the centre of the garden, boasting more golden apples than (y/n) could count. Its branches swayed in the faint breeze in mesmerising swoops, and the scent of fresh fruit laced with something that could only be described as addictive brushed over them. A faint mist swirled around the trunk of the tree, glittering slightly in the moonlight.
“Holy Hephaestus,” Beckendorf murmured, slack-jawed.
“That’s one big tree,” Luke said.
“You certainly have a way with words,” (y/n) said.
His hand only squeezed hers in response. She could feel his heartbeat in his wrist. How was it so steady?
There was a shift in the wind, then, and a soft bite came into the air. Goosebumps prickled the skin of their arms, raising the hair there. She wasn’t sure if she was imagining it, but she swore she could hear the faintest lull of singing voices and could feel the weight of some large presence in the air. Nothing could be seen but the beautiful garden and the decadent tree in the centre.
“Luke Castellan,” said a soft voice. Luke visibly tensed, eyes narrowing at the usage of his surname. “(y/n) (l/n). Charles Beckendorf. We have been expecting you in our Garden for quite some time now.”
The voice seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere all at once. But, finally, after a few moments, the speaker emerged from the fine mist.
She didn’t look like much, appearing to be barely older than (y/n), but there was something about her surrounding aura that suggested she was much, much older. Dark, inky hair tumbled over narrow tawny shoulders, framing even darker eyes that shone with unknown magic. The woman seemed to blink slowly, as if bored or tired, and it looked as though she were merely floating over the ground rather than walking. It was hard to tell. Her Greek chiton covered her feet.
“We are the Hesperides,” she said, voice ever gentle, as four more women appeared, each almost identical in appearance. “Daughters of the Evening. Nymphs of the Sunset. Protectors of this Garden. What is your business here?”
There was a cockiness to Luke’s smile then, one that had (y/n) on edge. “If you’ve been expecting us, then surely you know our business.”
The lead Hesperide drew nearer, stopping a few feet away from their trio. Her sisters gathered at her sides, dark eyes sparkling with stars and cold curiosity and something overtly bitter. The demigods were clearly unwelcome here, but they intended to make a game of their quest.
(y/n)’s hand squeezed Luke’s in warning. He spared her a glance, her heart drawing still when his warm eyes met hers. His chin dipped slightly in a nod, and he gave her hand a squeeze before turning his attention back to the Hesperides.
“We’ve been sent here on a quest by my father Hermes,” Luke announced. His voice held more confidence than she felt. “We’re here to retrieve a golden apple.”
It was strange watching the Hesperides’ heads tilt in unison as if they were each an extension of the other. Voices lulled around them, soft and gentle, and the worry seeped from her very bones. Her hand fell from Luke’s. Something felt strangely at ease in her stomach despite their circumstances.
“You may try,” said the lead Hesperide. Her skin glimmered like marble in the moonlight. “Our dearest Ladon protects this tree with his life. He does not sleep. Every second of every day, he guards our gift from Gaea, the goddess Hera’s wedding gift. Do not think it will be easy to pass him.”
The Hesperides seemed to fade into the mist, then, their bodies becoming light and transparent as they slowly backed away until nothing was left but the faint singing swirling around them. The voices gave (y/n) a strange feeling, as though pulling her towards the tree.
“Who’s Ladon?” Beckendorf asked.
The three of them stood for a moment, watching the swirling mist.
“A dragon,” (y/n) said. “A big dragon.”
She could feel his presence, she realised. The heavy weight that had settled over them upon entering the Garden, it couldn’t be anything else. Even still, she could feel him through the ground, like an impending sense of death and doom. She’d had similar feelings before, an innate knowledge that the strawberry fields were close to wilting one year. Campers had called her crazy, but she knew. The earth knew.
And it knew now. She was horribly aware of the heaviness in her gut that surrounded the bright power of the apple tree. It could be nothing but Ladon.
“Any ideas, Luke?” she asked. “You’re our idea guy.”
He scoffed. “Since when? You’ve been dragging us around by our ears this entire quest.”
But he could see the nerves that she felt. He knew how strange this was for her, to feel so deeply worried about a quest. He knew something was wrong.
“I’ll get the apple,” he said, and his shoulders rose with confidence. His hand, the one that had held (y/n)’s moments ago, twitched just so. “I’m the fastest out of the three of us. You two, keep our friend distracted.”
There was a deep grumble at that moment, as if Ladon were making himself known. It shook the ground and the boughs of the tree trembled. Sweet-smelling apples tumbled into the mist.
“Wouldn’t it make more sense for me to get the apples?” (y/n) asked. “You brought along a daughter of Demeter for a reason.”
He smiled softly at her. “That’s not the reason I brought you along.”
And, before either she or Beckendorf could protest his stupidity or question his statement, Luke’s glowing sword materialised in his hand and he was running into the mist.
The mist spread apart as his feet made contact, and (y/n)’s heart dropped. Beckendorf, one of the bravest demigods she had ever met despite his age, had a tremor in his hands as he pulled free his sword.
Within the mist was the largest monster (y/n) had ever seen. It was wrapped around the tree in a serpentine-like way, scales glimmering in the moonlight like molten copper and bronze. Massive claws sunk into the dirt surrounding the tree, at least the length of her forearm and as wide as Beckendorf’s. Every breath it released shook the branches of the tree as though caught in a gale.
The most horrifying part: the dragon had a hundred heads.
She had read about Ladon, had familiarised herself with the myths surrounding the Hesperides. Days before the quest, she and Luke had sat down at the canoe lake, poring over old history books that told the tale of Heracles and his Twelve Labours, one of which was the very quest they were being made to repeat. Luke had made a joke of it back then, unhappy with the quest he had been given and disbelieving that what they faced would be much of a threat.
But Ladon was no joke. It was an entirely different thing seeing drawings of the dragon and seeing him in real life. His hundred heads slithered through the air like snakes on the water, luminous yellow eyes watching the demigods with piqued interest.
Even Luke faltered.
A deep breath came from all two hundred of the dragon’s nostrils, washing over them in a hot, acidic wave. The smell alone was horrendous, like an old, decrepit sewer filled with rotting rats, and it had the hairs on her arms standing and her eyes burning.
She was worried that she may never be able to move again, frozen in place by the sheer might of Ladon, but when Luke turned to look at her, blood flooded into her veins again. He was counting on her. She wouldn’t let him down.
Ladon expected a frontal assault. He was waiting for Luke to attack, watching like a predator on prey, but he did not expect the very tree he protected to act against him.
With a heave of energy, (y/n) stretched out her arm and watched as the tree’s trunk began to swell as if filling with liquid. Ladon’s serpentine body writhed around it, twisting as he moved to accommodate the growing tree. The branches above him shook, dipping towards the ground slowly. Too slowly.
The dragon seemed to realise what, or who, was causing the change, and snarled ferociously. It was at that moment that Beckendorf grabbed a ball of Celestial bronze from his belt and, with a strong arm and remarkably good aim, threw it at the beast.
An explosion of green ignited before them as the ball slammed into Ladon’s thick hide. The dragon roared, whether in pain or fury, and set its bright gaze on (y/n) and Beckendorf.
Fear coursed through her body. She could hardly breathe. The branches wavered, pausing the pursuit to the ground. Beckendorf launched another one of his Celestial bronze bombs.
A pity quest, that’s what this had been. But, maybe, it was more than that. Maybe this was Hermes’ punishment for Luke wanting more from his life. Maybe this was (y/n)’s consequence for falling so irrevocably in love with Luke - for feeling the way she did, she would have to follow him to impossible circumstances.
But none of them deserved it.
It was at that moment that Luke took his leap.
With speed befitting a child of Hermes, he leapt onto Ladon’s mighty body, feet finding purchase on his rough scales, and launched himself upwards towards the descending branches.
For a moment, there was hope. Even Heracles had not retrieved the apples by facing Ladon, but maybe Luke would. Perhaps Luke would succeed where Heracles had not. Pride swelled in her heart, coated her tongue like warm honey, and she almost smiled.
Copper-coloured claws flashed in the moonlight. A chorus of soft, harmonising voices swirled around them like mist.
Mistake, they sang. The boy has made a mistake.
There was a cry of pain so guttural that (y/n) felt it in her soul. Her feet were moving before she could truly comprehend what was happening. The grass tried to reach for her ankles, tried to stop her in her mission, but nothing could. Had a god stood before her, she would have found her way past them. Nothing could stop her, not even this dragon that caused such fear in her bones.
She reached Luke as Ladon wound around the tree tightly, snarling protectively. Something in the beast’s demeanour hinted at pain beneath the danger, and when she saw the gold blood pooling just a few feet away, she knew why.
A claw, one of Ladon’s, severed from the knuckle down lay strewn in the grass. The dragon hissed as Beckendorf snatched it up, hefting his sword as (y/n) pulled Luke away.
He was bleeding badly. A deep gash ran from the tip of his brow down to the corner of his mouth, somehow missing his eye but cutting just above and below. His skin was already becoming dangerously pale. Her hands were covered in blood. His blood. She was going to be sick.
“Hey,” she murmured, gently laying his head on her lap. Her hands trembled as she reached into her bag. “You’re okay. You’re okay.”
Luke shuddered, eyes half-lidded and struggling to find something to focus on. “Are you -?”
“I’m fine,” she said. After a terrible moment, one that took far too long, she pulled free a small vial of nectar, wrapped tightly in old face-cloths to keep it from smashing in her bag. Her hands couldn’t stop shaking as she tried to unwrap it.
Beckendorf knelt beside her, claw at his side, and took the vial from her hands. She didn’t know how his hands could be so steady. She could hardly breathe. Not with Luke so injured, not with Ladon eyeing them hungrily.
He handed the vial back, and she propped Luke’s head up slightly. With a hiss of pain, she managed to open his mouth just enough to pour the small amount of nectar in. He swallowed with a struggle.
There was no telling how long it would take the nectar to work, but they couldn’t stay there under the watchful glare of Ladon, who looked ready to attack again. (y/n) took a trembling breath.
“Beckendorf,” she said, “are you able to carry him? At least until we can get out of this place. I can try - I can clean the wound when we’re safe.”
He nodded and hoisted Luke up into his arms, careful not to jostle his head too much.
She didn’t realise she had been crying until they stopped.
Beckendorf set Luke down on a soft patch of grass beyond the Garden, and (y/n) tucked her jacket underneath his head. The nectar seemed to be working, albeit slowly. Some colour was returning to his skin, but it was hard to see under all of the blood.
“You’re okay,” she murmured again, but she wasn’t sure who she was telling. She wiped her tears with the back of her hands.
She grabbed one of the face-cloths the vial of nectar had been wrapped in, soaking it in water from her water bottle, and slowly brought it to Luke’s face.
His eyes seemed to have some ability to focus now, watching her beneath a glaze of pain. It tore her soul in half to see him in pain, wincing as she gently dabbed the blood from his cheek. Her fingers were stained. His cheek was, too.
“I’m going to keep watch,” said Beckendorf. “Those Hesperides gave me a bad feeling.”
(y/n) nodded, watching for a moment as he trudged a few feet away, just out of earshot, but her focus soon returned to Luke. She tried not to think too much about how his hand was gripping her knee as she cleaned the rest of the blood.
“Is the nectar working?” she asked when she saw his eyes drooping. “What does it taste like?”
His gaze found hers, warm and cloudy. A pained smile fought its way onto his lips despite the slowly-healing scar on his cheek. She could see the skin trying to sew itself back together with the aid of the nectar.
“That smoothie you made a few months back with the - with the camp’s strawberries,” he uttered. “And whatever those green leaves were.”
She found herself smiling despite the red coating her hands. “Mint. And it was that good, huh? Last I checked, nectar for you tasted like that weird concoction of Coke and Sprite you liked so much.”
For a moment, his eyes grew distant before refocusing on her face. They flickered over her features as if seeing them for the first time. His hand felt awfully warm on her knee.
“Anything you make is better,” he said.
“Is that so?” She brushed his hair back from his face softly, cleaning the last bits of blood.
His skin was still stitching itself back together, but the nectar seemed to have stopped the bleeding. Second by second, blood flooded back into his face, giving him the colour that seemed to have been leached from his skin.
He nodded, his smile seeming as though it pained him less. His hand slipped from her knee, coming up to wrap itself around hers. The cloth fell from her fingers and onto the grass. Her fingers were still wet, though in the dim light she couldn’t tell if it was from water or lingering blood. She didn’t have the stomach to find out.
“You said you didn’t bring me on this quest because of my mother,” she said cautiously. Her heart was pounding in her chest. “So why did you?”
A soft squeeze of her hand. “This wasn’t a quest I wanted to do without you,” he said. “I like having you by my side. You give me strength.”
She was sure he could feel her pulse beating rapidly in her fingers, but he didn’t say anything about it. He didn’t need to. It was entirely likely that he was able to read her mind, he knew her so well. And she was okay with that.
“You’re stupid, you know,” she said, but her voice wavered.
“Stupidly brave?” he suggested. “Stupidly handsome? Stupidly charming?”
“I’m supposed to be supporting you right now,” she grumbled. “Not the other way around.”
His cocky grin was back and her heart fluttered. “Which one is it?”
“Which what?”
“Stupidly brave, handsome, or charming?”
All three, she thought. All three and so much more.
“Stupidly stupid,” she decided.
Her thumb grazed his cheekbone, the one without the scar, and a shiver ran through his body. His hand tightened on hers and his smile softened into something more personal. It was the kind of smile she would have leapt into Tartarus to ensure its permanence on his lips. Soft and kind and reserved just for her. If she'd been standing, her knees would have buckled.
“You give me strength, too,” she murmured.
A sliver of hair slipped in front of her eyes, and moments later, Luke’s free hand was there, gently brushing it away. His eyes sparkled. They seemed clearer now, less agonised.
The events of the last hour - gods, it had felt like much longer - came crashing back onto her at his touch, asphyxiating and terrifying. Overwhelming guilt filled her veins and arteries with terrible speed, sapping all the strength from her bones. Her fingers trembled once more.
“I’m sorry,” she said. Her throat felt suddenly raw. “If I’d done a better job distracting Ladon, maybe you wouldn’t be hurt.”
Luke’s eyes were dark for a moment, swirling with something she couldn’t identify, but they softened seconds later. His hand rested on her cheek, warm and comforting, but she couldn’t bring herself to look at his eyes now.
“This is not your fault,” he said, and his voice was remarkably strong. “This is the gods’ fault. It’s my father’s fault. But it is not your fault.”
She tried to believe him, truly she did, but looking at the fresh scar on his face, even having been almost entirely healed with nectar, had her heart heavy in her chest.
He knew this. Gods, he knew her every thought. His hand slipped from hers, cupping her other cheek and tilting her head so that she would look at him properly. There was a flush to his cheeks now - good, it meant he was getting better.
“My father did this,” he insisted. “You hear me? This was not you. And, gods, believe me when I say that I’m glad it was me that went for the apples and not you. I couldn’t live with myself if you got injured.”
But you did, she wanted to say - no, scream. How do I live with that?
“I’m okay,” he said softly, cautiously, as if talking to a child who had just woken from a nightmare. “I’m okay.”
His hand fell from her face, taking hers in its grip once more, and placed her fingers on the newly formed scar.
She jerked back, terrified that the sensation would cause him more pain, but he just gave her that smile again, the one that made her knees feel like jelly, and pressed her fingers to it once more. Already, the skin was raised and slightly twisted, accommodating for the injury. She could faintly feel his pulse beneath his skin, slow and infuriatingly steady.
“It doesn't hurt,” he promised. His voice was so reassuring that she could feel it in her bones, and she was half-convinced he was secretly a child of Aphrodite, blessed with charmspeak. “I’m okay because of you.”
Her throat was achy. “And Beckendorf.”
He gave a small laugh. “And Beckendorf. But mainly you. You’ve given me strength.”
It was then that the world itself seemed to stop. He was leaning upwards, bringing her face close to his, and his lips brushed hers so softly that she feared she may have been dreaming the entire encounter.
She could taste the faint remnants of metallic blood, though it was easily brushed aside. Luke’s lips were slightly wind-chapped but she found herself uncaring when they slotted perfectly against hers.
This kiss was something she had been waiting years for, and it was better than she could have ever dreamed. The feeling of his hands on her, his lips against hers, it was something that could not be replicated in a dream, like flying for the first time and feeling the clouds beneath your fingers.
It was addictive, more so than the stupid apples that had caused Luke such pain, and she found herself wanting more. It was an effort to pull away from him, but eventually, she did. Beckendorf was only a few feet away and she didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. It would make for an awkward journey home.
“You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to do that,” Luke murmured.
Finally, there was a smile tugging on her lips again. “You’ve no idea how long I’ve been waiting.”
It took another hour or so before Luke was well enough to get moving. The dark trails gave all of them a bad feeling, and (y/n) wasn’t able to shake the almost hypnotic choral voices of the Hesperides until they were out of the State Park. Luke was shaky on his feet for a little while but his strength was returning.
And with it came anger.
Not anger at (y/n) or Beckendorf, no. He still smiled at them as usual, fingers entwined with (y/n)’s so tightly it was as though he was afraid she would slip away. Jokes still slipped past his lips despite the events of the evening.
But he was filled with fiery rage. It was hidden, but (y/n) could read him like a book. She had seen the inklings of it throughout the previous days of their quest, had seen it more clearly while she was cleaning the blood from his face - this anger, though, was pure. Harder to mask.
He had already been furious with his quest, a detail he had tried to keep hidden from her. He hated the idea of repeating history and the fact that this quest was simply made to satiate him, to prevent him from growing restless at camp and questioning the authority of the gods.
This was a breaking point.
It became clearer the more time passed. As the days and weeks went by, he would hold her hand like a lifeline and kiss her so softly it felt as though she was dreaming, but the anger never left. It ate away at him, dimming his smiles and reducing any respect he had left for the gods until there was nothing left but a shadow of what had once been there.
The scar never faded. It became a reminder of what he believed to be the gods’ failure. His failure.
He was still her Luke. The Luke she had known and loved since she was thirteen. She was just terrified of what he might become.
#givemea-dam-break#luke castellan x reader#pjo luke x reader#pjo luke castellan x reader#pjo x reader#percy jackson and the olympians x reader#luke castellan#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo#x reader#fanfiction#luke castellan fanfiction#pjo fanfiction
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Something about Buck never really allowing himself to feel and instead always running from his feelings by chasing things he thinks will fix him, but Eddie, the master of pretending he's fine, always feeling too much too deeply and too often until he breaks.
#buck refuses to confront or deal with what he feels#yeah he hides his feelings from other people but more importantly he hides them from *himself* by refusing to confront them#and looking to everything on the outside of himself to bandage them up so he can pretend not to feel them#while eddie is just stuck in this hell of feeling everything all the time#but being utterly incapable of confronting it#until the dam finally breaks on him#anyway#buddie#random buddie thoughts#evan buckley#eddie diaz#911
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I’m rereading Po3 and despite its flaws I really enjoyed the introduction to the three. Jaykit isn’t mentioned to be blind in the first few chapters and instead they chose to show how much MORE capable he is compared to his littermates; until at the end of chapter 3, he brings up his blindness on his own. It makes forcing him to be a medicine cat SO much more frustrating because it really feels like they’re setting him up to be a warrior and choose his own fate (note i haven’t finished the reread this is just my first impression)
I like how you seem to take that path in BB regardless! It makes his arc so much more enjoyable
His arc in canon is super frustrating because he's such an independent character who clearly wants to make his own decisions in life, but then he just gets shoved into the medcat den. I LIKE that he ultimately goes there and that he enjoys it; but it was still really fucked up that they stripped away his autonomy in the process.
Re: they are not real, they are writing choices. Taking away the choices a disabled character can make over their own life, forcing them into a celibate nun role, and then going "awwwww dont worry see? he likes it! This was the best thing for him :)" was fucked up.
And imo it didn't have to be that way! You wouldn't have to go the FULL route I did with big changes, he could just be more involved in the descision to stop being a warrior apprentice and it would be fine. Minor change that would make a world of difference.
I do also have to interject to say though... blindness should really not be an extremely severe impairment for a ThunderClan cat.
I'm dead serious.
Whiskers are built-in sensors that tell you the exact position of everything within several inches of your head, ears swerve to pick up sound, and the jacobson's organ provides a sense of smell so keen that I have an entire Clanmew expansion draft because I needed to make WORDS describing the power of this sense that humans do not have. I cannot stress enough how delicate their other senses are, felines do not rely on their sight like primates do
ThunderClan lives in a mixed-oak woodland, where sight is already often obscured by foliage, objects are close together (for whiskers to feel), and nearly every movement makes noise against the leaf litter. RiverClan and (moor-running) WindClan cats would have a harder time with this disability than Thunder or Shadow.
Cat sight SUCKS to begin with. It sucks BADDD. They don't have color vision, they're significantly nearsighted, and they can't track up-and-down movements well. WC doesn't write realistic cats (more like small fuzzy people really) and I also work with more humanesque eyesight, but the only thing Jay should really lose is an ability to rapidly track a small animal swerving fast. Blind cats are often still excellent hunters in spite of that!
So it's an extra big waste that they railroaded him into a position he didn't choose, saying he couldn't be a warrior. This is the perfect disability to write, if you want to explore how ableism can impact the characters in this society who ARE legitimately still capable of nearly full independence, but still need to find accommodations for what they can't do.
In the same arc they're doing the dumb Cinder Reincarnation Plotline, no less!! Where SHE is also feeling like she has no choice over her "destiny," and gets a conflict over a potentially disabling injury
"Oh nooo if cinderpaw breaks her leg she wont be a warrior!"
"What the f-- Im Jaypaw and im reporting live from the scene where a Category 1 Idiot Moment is taking place. Woman breaks leg, suddenly everyone believes she is a horse, more at 11."
One of these days I should really make "herb guides" just covering how various sensory disabilities impact the lives of Clan cats and some tips for writing them as warriors, especially between Clans. Stuff you wouldn't usually consider, like how much noise deaf cats tend to make, how RiverClan would get a ton of sinus infections and lose their sense of smell, being blind in Sky vs Thunder, etc.
#I once saw someone say offhandedly 'well what if someone snuck up on jay from behind and attacked him. No whiskers there'#NEWSFLASH! YOU ALSO DONT HAVE EYES IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD#He doesn't have short whiskers either they're normally sized#Something like 4 - 5 inches on a cat like him. About double the size of the head foward and sideways#Once you're talking about close combat like the cats usually do there's no way that you can stay back far enough to avoid them#I want to rewrite owl and jay's fight or make a rematch where jay realizes owl is being a coward#Hanging just out of his range and jabbing at him#But once he realizes it's just a coward's strategy it clicks that the counter is to be aggressive#And not let his opponent out of his 'range'#Also give him a neat little scene where they're grappling next to Black's dam project where it's super muddy#And Jay is like 'YOU WANT TO PLAY DIRTY? LETS GET FILTHY' and dunks Owl's face down into the mud#Because Jay can fight without his sight but Owl doesn't know how to continue while there's stinging gunk in his eyes and nose#I like thinking about what I'm going to do for BB!Jay's matches because his fighting style is really fun to write#1. Be aggressive and proactive 2. Don't let them out of range 3. SCARE THEM#From the Mud Match he learns that the best way to end a fight quickly is to absolutely terrify them#Because they're usually not expecting the fight to be difficult nor are they expecting to feel like theyre in danger#So if you surprise them it breaks their willpower real fast#And as he gains a reputation for brutality he faces less opponents until he's practically known as the Cleric Without Mercy#Bone babble
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I wish the north and northwest of Germany a very "please don't drown in the floods". I am readying my own lifeboat.
#german stuff#we have so much fucking water and it wont stop raining until thursday#our dams are breaking
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Forever thinking of teasing someone's clit with my tongue until they cum in my mouth, but the thought of sucking someone to orgasm while they sneeze helplessly, making no effort to cover or lean away from me, really letting themself enjoy both the sensation of my mouth working them up to climax and the sneezes that wash over them, leaving them trembling....yeah. Repeat as many times as they want until they're totally satisfied. Telling me exactly what they need from me between gasps and uncontrollable sneezing. I'm really thinking about that
#I'm yearning tonight#a whole weekend of being unable to lust and now the dam is breaking#sneeze kink#sneezefucker#snz fet#snz kink#snzfucker#nttalks
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at any given moment on this beautiful green earth you are spared of me liveblogging how carnally i desire peter ustinov
#ramble tag#but for how long...#this dam is about to break i swear but the tag is criminally empty!! i guess its up to me to make thirst content 🙏
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Hello! IF you don't mind me asking, I want to hear a little more about your bdsm fic. Particularly about Armand's role in it. Did I get it right that lestat will feel insecure feeling he doesn't give louis what he needs in bed compare to Armand? And more importantly, how wrong is he about it? Does he misunderstand Louis or Louis actually craves something more adventurous in bed than lestat can give (for now?) I know it's fine from Lestats pov so we won't get to see in Louis' head so I'm curious, will he be upfront about his feelings about it with Lestat or will he (try to?) hide something.
I hope I didn't completely misunderstand premise of this fic 😅 thank you for your work :)
Hi! You basically have the bones of it. The fic's kind of structured around Louis and Lestat finally moving in together in New Orleans, as they talked about in Ungodly Hour, and a part of that being Louis selling the Dubai apartment and clearing it out, and all the evidence arriving on their doorstep of Louis and Armand's sexual dynamic (along with Armand's reappearance in all their lives) triggering Lestat on a whole bunch of fronts.
The focus on the fic is less about Armand, and more about the fact that Lestat has a pretty broken barometer when it comes to BDSM, especially being a man coming of age in Paris wihen Marquis de Sade was laying a foundation for extreme BDSM by writing sexual depravity into French literary canon, which included the fetishisation of rape in the immediacy before Lestat himself was raped.
Spoilers for the fic, but:
The fic jumps around to different chapters of time quite a lot, and a part of that is that Lestat and Louis experiment with bondage in the pre-Claudia Rue Royale era, and Lestat gets triggered to the point that he breaks the bed. In the moment of it, Louis' young and can't really bring Lestat back to himself because he has 0 context at that point in time (and feels alienated from him as a result), and so when Lestat suggests that they explore it in the modern timeline - now that Louis does have the full context - Louis just point-blank says no. And like, yes, it's partially out of the memory of how Bad it was when they tried it a century ago, but it's also out of a sense of genuine love and protectiveness (but he doesn't articulate that because he's as crap at communicating as Lestat is really, haha).
And y'know! Louis does like BDSM, but he loves sex with Lestat, so for him, he means it when he says that he doesn't need it! But Lestat gets extremely in his own head about Louis saying that he doesn't want to do it with him, when he did it with Armand?? For Years???? Because obviously he can't admit that it would have anything to do with him having trauma, and then they argue and they do it, but Louis has the full context now, so it goes - -
Well.
A lot better than it did in Rue Royale era, haha.
#so yeah the armand stuff is more about breaking the dam#to the deluge of Stuff That Lestat Hasn't Dealt With#more than it is actually about insecurity over armand#fic asks
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