#crying isnt weak
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Diophne (Dee-off-nee), she/her, goes by Dee.
I made a cute little sylvari! She cries so much and she has a little cat. She's way different from the usual commander I make and it'll be fun to explore with how she reacts to things.
#gw2#guild wars 2#gw2 art#gw2 sylvari#diophne#shes so cute tho#also she cries a lot but i dont want to make that seem like shes weak#crying isnt weak#not crying isnt strong#being emotional is not a weakness#her weakness is that she cares so much and shes emotional#but shes the commander#shes not weak#shes strong#shes strong and she also cries#shes also not naive or stupid#that said theres a ton of points in the story where she cries#where all my other commanders were relatively unaffected or expressed their anger/sadness in a different way#also the cat is a warclaw#and i wanna shove her into the mists for a little bit bc she thinks its a good way to train#and im stealing my own idea and she channels aurene when she gets to HoT and on#shes a formidable fighter before but after shes bonded with the egg she gets new magic#and everyone kinda just chalks it up to being connected to the egg#which is true technically.
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im actually losing my mind and idk who needs to hear this (me): toji, for all his crassness, had truly loved one (01) woman. he loved her to the point that not only did her death cause him to spiral (canon event btw) but she (holding baby gumi) was his last thought as his consciousness fades away after the fight with gojo.
dear god. this man, who has never known love all his life, was able to love because of her. he loved her so much, he wanted a future with her. but how could he forget? nothing in that universe ever worked out for him. upon the death of his wife, so too did the last remnant of toji’s love fizzle out.
#arguments could be made that toji loved his second wife but character stats showed that it was really#megumi’s mother who toji loved#shaking crying jjk manga isnt for the weak#and i am so so weak#sun rambles
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My submission for @aimportantdragoncollector's trioholders event (bonus round)!!
they are at the beach
#why? to smash childrens sandcastles and so yoichi can force third to let him give him a sand mermaid tail#jk its because yoichis pale ass needs to photosynthesise#even just a smidge of tan would be a miracle#anyways it took me 16 days but i did it yall#im gonna go cry in a corner now this was a PAIN to draw#was nearly gonna draw thirds hand on yoichis waist but then i realised i'd have to draw hands 😔#i was gonna give yoichi sunglasses but i ran out of time (ironic isnt it)#i had to make sure my first proper piece with the third ofa user was immaculate. i simply had to go plus ultra on him#....then the abs came#suddenly my will to art vanished#dont ask what happend with yoichi.... i cannot explain this phenomenon/miracle#something snapped in me after all my horrible yoichi arts i did the previous month#third only took me 3 days to draw. BLAME YOICHI FOR HOW LONG THIS TOOK!!!#his prettiness became the weakness for me finishing by the deadline#mha#shigaraki yoichi#yoichi shigaraki#one for all#my hero academia#first ofa user#third ofa user#my art#Three Weeks Of Trioholders#ichisan#i swear if i forgot a tag in here im gonna cry ITS TOO DAMN MANY#being someone that overdoes everything and is a artist AND writer is so painful. limits dont exist in the eyes of tien#just like sugis many ways to store me away#YEAH YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE SAFE HUH SUGI NOW EVERYONE KNOWS YOUR A VAULTER#i will escape from under your shoe. one day.
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sometimes i think about the way sunday is 100% fine with doing fucked up things as long as he thinks the people he’s doing those things to deserve them
#thinking out loud 🏵️#honkai star rail#listen i might cry and sob over sunday whenever i think abt him#but he is BRUTAL#like look at what my guy did to aventurine 😭#straight up said ur dying now have fun#and he didnt feel ANY remorse because in his eyes aven was the villain#aven was a threat to penacony#and so in his mind his actions were justified#its the same w gallagher#sunday is an asshole to him because gallagher killed his sister (and he doesnt know that shes actually fine)#im telling you if gallagher didnt stab sunday when he did#sunday wouldve started pulling out his whole oh triple faced soul thing#and he wouldve been a lot worse to gallagher than to aven#would it have worked? no idea bc gallagher. isnt exactly real#but who knows#sunday is kind and empathetic no doubt about it#but like an angel he is kind to the weak and ruthless to the wicked#and i LOVE that about him#he’ll be a decent person but the second he has any reason to believe that youre a threat#its free real estate#i have a lot of thoughts on sunday#maybe one day ill share my perspective on how stellaron hunter sunday could work from a narrative standpoint#but today is not that day
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I feel like I have an unacceptably low level of control over my body. Like obviously there are some things that no one can control but I have like actual big problems because of it. I'm not really sure how to describe it but it's not just me being really clumsy (although that is an effect of it) or even the tics I have.
It's like I can feel my body moving wrong constantly but I can't correct it and it hurts and it sucks and I'm tired. I'm tired of hurting myself, making mistakes, breaking things, acting like it's fine when in reality I'm constantly afraid of how much any movement I make next could hurt me. I need to move to stay sane, I want to workout and get stronger and go on walks with my friends. I wanna get better. I can't even roll over in bed without pain and I'm just so tired.
#opossums chronic illness rants#seriously though this sucks so much and idk if theres anything i can do about it but i wanna try#its probably a combination of a lot of different things#like muscle weakness and instability from ehlers danlos syndrome both making each other worse#along with the poor proprioception from autism the dizzyness and weakness from the dysautonomia#the fact that i cant really see and even possibly inner ear damage (thats a new one that ive been suspecting more and more recently)#im not sure if the ear damage would be just from built up ear wax or maybe or something else#but im really not having a good time because it brings back bad memories#when i was a kid (8 i think) my mom was convinced i had compacted ear wax but given that she refused to ever#take me to doctors she decided she had to fix it herself#which led to a lot of excruciating trials where she stuck wires and que tips stripped of their cotton into my ears#and tried to scrape out whatever she could. even though i wanted her to stop because it hurt so bad i would start crying everytime#im also mildly suspicious that might be what damaged my ears in the first place... but i really have no way to know that at the moment#all i know is i dont want anyone looking in or putting things in my ears ever again#it doesnt even matter how much i trust them because now anything put in my ears hurt#like even when im just regularly cleaning them with que tips it hurts and im reminded that might not be normal#idk if you read these tags let me know if cleaning your ears is supposed to hurt i guess?#im honestly not sure. like i just always assumed i wasnt being gentle enough or something but it doesnt matter what i do#its not super painful either just a little bit so i ignored it because i assumed it was normal#since a lot of 'normal' things hurt for me. which i now know to my surprise isnt normal at all but i didnt figure that out#until i actually got people to believe that these things were hurting me#apparently its very hard to find anyom#who believes that opening bag clips or trying to lift a jug of milk are actually quite painful for me#they usually just say im way overreacting and when i was a kid i just believed them i guess
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she is beauty we are world class needs some salt and pepper I could also add some garlic and sage some tomatoes hmm more salt and pepper salt
#when compared to the rest of the album shes weak im so sorry#its the girl at home taylors version disease for me#its not giving and also its a crime putting it after chicago saturdays and silver tongues TO BE FOLLOWED by common people#louis did her dirty#sorry chicago not there my mistake#imo itd look better if after waoyf#but still the beat of it isnt giving it isnt matching louis voice its not it i wanna cry the title is so good the rest just isnt 😭😭😭#stop sophia#i cant pick my top 3 but my least top three is bigger than me!!! the greatest and sibwawc tied w ooms (but this one is growing on me)#and although it has more skips than walls ..............ilikeitbetter#fuck that was hard to admit it took me a few weeks#fitf is good good
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#sorry i need to vent ignore this#my new years resolution for 2023 was to work out consistently and get fit#bc i was really embarrassed at how physically weak i was last summer#and for the most part i did but with prepa and stuff i couldnt exercise as much as i wanted#but i still lost a bit of weight and was somewhat happy with the results for a while but#now i hate it again i hate it so much#ive been dancing a LOT (like 4h/week min. which is a lot for a fulltime uni student) bc it's convenient and good cardio and most of all FUN#and yeah the weight i lost is due to that and my cardio is good and im definitely much more fit than last year but#i still hate the way i look. so viscerally. and i know its my brain telling me nonsense bc it's not like a body can 'look bad'#and i'm lit a healthy weight im just a little thicker than french standards?#but i need to exercise more i want to lose all this fat i pinch my skin and wish it would melt beneath my fingers#but i dont have time or money for the gym and no buddy to go with and im intimidated so i just work out from home but#it's not enough i feel so discouraged. body dysmorphia in the summer really doesnt help my seasonal depression#like i truly believed this year would be my 'summer body' or whatever shit that means and its not and idk what to do i just want to be#in another persons skin. have another persons body. anyone truly#to the point that dancing isnt even fun for me anymore it's just competitive w myself i want to maximize the calories i burn and#i sometimes record myself cause i want to see the steps i miss and i did and i saw my body and it killed all my joy.#made me wanna die and cry. i stopped dancing immediately and i just swallowed back the tears cause theres no way i look like that.#so repulsive and nowhere near where i wanted. and again i know it's in my head there's no such thing as a 'repulsive' body due to weight!?!#but i cant apply that reasoning to myself. and i hate myself so much rn#im being called for dinner rn but i'd honestly rather not eat. i think i'd feel horribly gross if i ate anything right now#i told my friends i'd stop using hunger as a form of self-punishment but it almost feels satisfying in a twisted way... like i deserve it#clara tais toi#like ia m SO obsessed with my appearance in a way that is borderline unhealthy i am SO#preoccupied by how im perceived (physically) if i look hot if i look pretty if i look cute at any and all times and#the answer is never ever satisfactory because other ppls judgement of me cannot fix my own but like#it's so exhausting. i'm so exhausted#dl later
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seems like we are at the crying part of the illness.
#we can postpone cjristmas#gonna talk in da tags for a bit because a post full of perosmal info feels so gross#ive been crying on and off for hours. km so upset being atuck in my fucking room with covid while nobody else is sick at all#and im glad nonody is sick im just so fucking lonely#started symptoms on friday#twsted neg fri and sat. didnt test sundah cause i dont have a lot. tested monday and was psorive#literally slept with my bf all of those nights#shared weed pen on sunday with ofher roommate#nobody else is sick#i just feel so sad and tired. im used to himan or cat affection daily and ive had none. i feel so lonley and trapped#i did everythjng right to avoid being sick and my bf was also with me that whole day and he didnt get sick#i feel stupid weak and pathetic for gettinf sixk. i dont have symptoms anymore but atill positive#im so fucking sad and i can hear people hanging out and they are havjng fun and im glad but im jealous#im so sad and lonely. i want to wrap things for christmas and do more stockjng sruffer shopping. i want to watch movjes with people#i love holidays because i love to hang out with my friends and i fucking cant amd today especially its really tearing me up#my bf is upset that im no communicating and hes trying to cheer me up but everything is making me misribke and i dont know how to stop it#i like to do things for people when theyre sick and i know everyone isnt like me but it hurts to not have that done for me#offering to order food is nice bjt j want skmething made for me but nkbody is as good as i am at making things and i dont want to ask#i dont want to bother people but im literally breakkng down today. cant atop fucjing crying and i feel weak and pathetic. stupid#i tried so hard not to get sick and they are saying o dont want to fucking do that#id rather everyone open stockjngs and do presents without me because im tired of not saying what i got people i want tk show people#i like wrapping gifts and nobody wants me to toich anything because of cocid so others are wrapping things from me for me#i dont know its all very stupid but i feel very alone but also dont want people joking at me to make me feel better. im just mad and sad#ok im done now:) ill post a drawing later#nap time#text
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I know in most fanfic, it always depicted irida patching up adamans wound but hear me out
Irida got hurt and adaman has to patch her up except he's scolding her and everything but she's mad And snarky too, like, ugh we both have huge scars it's not like we haven't dealt with sth like this before, all come with the role 🙄 and he just slipped up and goes, well damn hope it gets worse! I'm being rewarded for my worries with a mouthful? Except he's srsly so concerned and the unfazed tired look of iridas was srsl rubbing him the wrong way, getting mad and the cold hitting him at the right time the guy was getting choked up and Irida is frozen.....not from the cold obviously but from the fact she realizes he cared? The guy who was forced to be stuck with her, whom she burden with this wound, cared this much about his rival? That's crazy, not even her clan members would care that much if she was hurt or not, and maybe it should've hit her sooner that wasn't exactly a good thing.
Now oh shit they're both sobbing, Adaman is pointing at her and laughing, and shes hitting his hand away but she couldnt keep her frown tight and soon erupt into laughing too. This is so silly, and man is it different from how her previous incident aftermath went. It was nice to be cared for, it was nice to laugh and cry with someone who sees you as a person, and who didn't force you through the pain.
Its genuinely so fucking funny to me cuz in that moment both of them have two completely different thoughts.
When Adaman is hurt, his wardens are worried but he tries not to worry them too much! But he still let them take care of him cuz he knows they care and he just laughs and finds it silly and endearing. So irida being ungrateful as shit and trying to get it over with is so alien to him cuz he loves being cared for! And appreciate the people around him for the love they shower him in.
But all irida life every time she felt even an ounce of emotion that was deemed weak and unfit for a leader, she was punished and ignored. So wounds were nothing but a burden she must carry and no one else! She can take care of it, and Adaman's scolding wasn't seen as a form of worry to her it was just needless rants about how incompetent she is, and that enrages her in a way. Great her clan already look down on her and now him too?
#z rambles#me rambling about ny ship: this is awful. drop it#I LOVEEEE VILLANIZING THE PEARL CLAN ITS HEALING!!!!!#also if i didnt mkaw it clear enough in my stupid rant. prettg much all her time training or getting hurt#she wasnt cared for much and was mostly scolded to stop crying and continue working and trsining#that if she showes weakness then shes not trustworthy or good enough fir the position. so it was weird#it was really weird when someone else was mad and uoset on her behalf snd shes annoyed!! this isnt a big deal its jsut a scratch#and its not a scratch and it hurts a fucking lot but she wasnt gonna show that thats weak. and she is not weak#its just a funny moment like it gets tense and serious but adaman is like shivering drom the cold but also.laughing#cuz irida doesnt cry too often and she does now subconsciously and its so funny but maybe cuz hes relief to see this too#and she csnt stay mad. this is....what a revelation and she never thought it could happen with...this fucking guy of all people#ANYWAYSSSSSS#edir : added the other hakf of my rambles idk if it works now with my old rsmbling tag lmao
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ow
#i keep having to have gentle conversations with myself where i remind myself its ok to cry because it hurts. pain isnt fun. its ok to cry.#crying might even help a little. you aren't weak or annoying for crying because you are hurting.
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this is currently a mourning era for ot7 briize now,,,,we lost a baddie yall 💔💔💔
every single bitch who sent and paid for those funeral wreaths in front of sm when seunghan came back, you all have a special place in hell for hating on that man for doing nothing wrong
#im gonna cry#I hate knetz#riize#riize seunghan#seunghan#sm do ur job#wtf was this#this is so bizarre#i cannot w this no more#being a kpop stan isnt for the weak#ot6 briize i hate you
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computer fastest way to the joker lair NO freeways..... puter?!
#computer fastest way to not being exhausted all the time.....PUTER SAVE ME#im so#sorry not sorry im ranting in the tags rn#i havent had sex in so long#i wanted to hang wuth my partner this weekend FINALLY alone without having to fucking drive 7 hours to be alone and acutally ahve like no#plans and we get stuck with the baby and im so sick of being treated like an extra mother for him#i love him so much dont get me wrong but like..... why am i getting NONE in my relationship bc im too tired after dealing with him or the#teenagers and the one fucking time ive been looking forward too all week i get fucking dumped with the baby AGAIN#like i do not want kids for THIS EXACT REASON no fucking free time no fucking time for myself or my fucking hobbies or my fucking partner#i wanted to cut and dye my hair today after shopping i wanted to sit and fucking watch a movie and makeout with my partner and instead i ge#a sick toddler whos fucking sleeping like shit to worry about like GOD I WANT TO SCREAM#im just#so fucking done with kids and babies anf fucking children and i cant stand this house and all the noise and all the fucking mess and just#EVERYTHING it is everything i hate and i cant fucking do anything about it and i fucking CRIED bc i was so frustrated and i dont cry super#often not bc like i think its weak i just its not smth i do often and im just sick of my relationship having to go ont he backburner bc of#the baby and IM FUCKING ONLY 22!!!!!!!! LIKE WHY ARE THESE MY FUCKING PROBLEMS AT 22 WITH A KID THAT ISNT EVEN MIIIIIIIINE#okay i need to shut up sorry#tw: vent#tw: rant#「mercury speaks」
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I played laufey's 'letter to my 13 year old self' for my 49 year old father in the car and he cried :)
#AND THATS THE CORRECT RESPONSE. CRYING ISNT 'UNMANLY' OR 'WEAK'#laufey#live laugh laufey#letter to my 13 year old self
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//y'all I'm gonna level with you. working that overnight shift destroyed my body last night. I'm in a lot of pain and it's making it hard to do anything I wanted to today?? if my arms stop hurting, I plan on attempting drafts and fixing up my muse page. if not... well, I'll try again tomorrow//
#we ended up working overtime to finish things so the shift was 8.5 hours WHICH ISNT TERRIBLE I KNOW#but Im weak af and havent worked an IN PERSON shift that long in quite some time#esp not one with so much physical strain#having to scan hundreds of heavy hardcover books WHILE BENDING and hunched over is not easy okay!#and thats enough complaining for now#gonna go cry and ingest some more weed#laughing my anxiety off {ooc}
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love starting something to help with my confidence and now three months in, my worst fears have been confirmed and also ive been told meaner things than even i have said to myself
#i think ive just been numb all weak since crying for hours abt it on monday lol#im not feeling anything#also am i supposed to just ignore what this man told me?#that i need to stop trying so hard bc im never really going to be that good#like bestie i already knew i was never going to be on the west end but why are you telling me this while im actively sobbing#why did you make me tell you i was happy with myself for a failing grade#why did you make it so so clear that you personally were failing me even if the quote unquote system would round it up#anyway im mad#man isnt even a qualified singing teacher and has never acted ever#also i know for a fact ive had further music education than him lmao#and that he keeps on spreading straight up misinformation about how music works#in a trying to simplify it way but has actually made it so itll be impossible for anyone trying to figure out music in the future#its so so so easy tp teach the basics of sheet music
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idk i think maybe this is getting into last straw territory
#cannot draw because they've got into my head so much#me when i put the pencil to the paper and proceed to panic and cry because they're in my fucking head now#i just wanted to draw !!! this is my last escape!!!#i feel so stupid and weak for letting this happen but i dont know what else to do#i cant draw. i cant even draw. this is so fucked. idk if I've ever had this happen before.#''things get better :)'' everything just keeps getting worse. i think i am just fated to kill myself honestly#I can't do this anymore. if I dont have drawing then i honestly have nothing left#im so scared. this is supposed to be the one thing i can reliably do. I can't do this I can't do this i cannot do this#i can't even muster enough brainpower to be properly afraid right now. jesus christ this is so fucked#i need to go i need to leave i need to not be existing im so tired and I'm being left with nothing#the pencil is supposed to be there for me and now it isnt so what do i have left. i need to go i think#vent /#suicide tw
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