milksnake-tea

[milksnake-tea]

❀ ˎˊ- prompt: he was never allowed to grieve. ❀ ˎˊ- aventurine character study ❀ ˎˊ- wc: 545 ❀ ˎˊ- warnings: vent fic, spoilers for aventurine's backstory. got a little too personal but. yeah. really needed to get this off my chest (this is about my childhood dog btw, i didn't lose any person but... sighs i might as well have) ❀ ˎˊ- taglist: @sh0jun , @themoderatelyawesomeninja , @xphantasmagoriax , @rainswept , @lucensei , @akutasoda , @naraven , @scribs-dibs , @apathicace , @flurrina , @tragedy-of-commons , @cakechase , @kiiyoooo , @moineauz ❀ ˎˊ- img credits

When someone's sister dies, they cry.

That's how it's always been. Loss, tears, and grief all went hand in hand. When you lose someone, you ache. You become numb. You feel as if all the world's come to a halt, except it hasn't, because time goes on regardless of who dies and who lives, and the world keeps spinning even if you are lost, even if you are still, the sun will keep burning, the birds will keeping singing, and people will keep living.

That's how it's supposed to be.

But Kakavasha... never felt that.

He is stolen, taken from his homeland, and with it, he abandons time itself. His eyes lose their light, and he is caught up in the fight to survive, too scared, too busy to remember his family. He has no time to cry, and so he forgets altogether.

And before he knows it, he is grown, and his chains are no more.

And he thinks nothing of it.

Time passes, and the world turns. He meets many people, most of which he forgets and few he will always remember. He throws himself into the thrill of the gamble, clinging onto his godforsaken luck and praying, praying with one hand behind his back, that his mother, that tricyclops in the sky, is watching so that the last of her legacy isn't snuffed here.

And every so often, when he is alone in his condo, in his luxury apartment, when he is allowed to think, he remembers. He remembers sand and sky, rain and hail, he remembers tents and rags and shawls and the hold of his sister's hand in his.

He remembers, and for a second, that age-old grief begins to surface, and then-

His tablet pings, and he is forced to move on once more.

And it kills him. He loved his family, did he not? They had born him, raised him, nutured him, and adored him, and he had them. They were his everything, his past that no one would know, and they are what's left of Kakavasha in the new facade that is Aventurine.

And yet, he hasn't shed a single tear for them.

Did he not love them enough? Is he really so heartless, so indifferent that he would not cry for those who had died for him? What kind of cruel- What kind of son doesn't grieve their family?

He should be sadder- He has to be. If not for himself, then in respect for them, to honor them with the mourning they deserve.

But he isn't.

But then, one day, while on yet another business trip, Kakavasha catches sight of a family. A mother and a father, an older sister and a younger brother.

And they look so... happy.

And for a second, his practiced smile stills. And he watches. From the table outside a coffee shop, a newspaper in his hand, peering over his gold-rimmed glasses, he watches.

He sees the brother complain as the sister playfully bullies him. He sees the mother reprimand them both, and the father hide a smile at it all. He sees their smiles, so bright and untarnished. He sees the brother hold his sister's hand.

It isn't until the newspaper crinkles and dampens his hand that he realizes.

reblogs w comments are appreciated !!

[milksnake-tea]

remember those who could not make it to today. honor their memory. live for them.

this year, more than ever. remember those who have perished. live for them. live for yourself. existence is resistance

[milksnake-tea]

OH MY GOD. SHES ETHERAL WHAT THE HELL

WHAT THE FUCK

[milksnake-tea]

tysm for the tag yona !!

me when i literally have clothes of most of these colors

no pressure tags: @lowkeyren @vxnuslogy @ughscara @tragedy-of-commons @luvether @snobwaffles @mitsvriii @https-sourlimes <333

Which oddly specific colour palette are you?

Thank you for the tag, @citrus-moonlight!!! This is... quite literally my wardrobe color on top of the eyeshadows/lipsticks I wear on the daily so this is actually quite spooky skfjsdkf

Link to quiz.

No pressure tags (and you if you see this!): @sixpennydame @nube55 @littlerequiem @pinkberryfox @thechaoticarchivist

[milksnake-tea]

illu illumination illusive illuday

RAYRAYY pushes the cat away from the screen those peepers scare me

[milksnake-tea]

illului.

anonymous.

[milksnake-tea]

I think you're a lovely person, I'm just too shy to interact. Have a great day ahead !

EUUEUEUEUEU THATS SO SWEET 😭😭😭 tysm???? ur so cute anon squishes u u have a good day too !! and don't be afraid to talk to me, i swear i don't have rabies

[milksnake-tea]

15 days until sunday i cant do this anymore

when we get battle voicelines i apologize for the yapper i'll become in your inbox 😿

OH FUCK UR RIGHT I 😭😭😭😭 dw thats so real bc LORDDDD IM NOT GOING TO BE OKAY

[milksnake-tea]

mafia!AU

i don't remember where i was going with this

[milksnake-tea]

I FOUND MY NEW MAIN DPS HOLY SHITITITITJT

[milksnake-tea]

"Is it a safe space to say i hate-" NOT IN THE MAINTAGS IT ISNT

[milksnake-tea]

lui.

anon.

[milksnake-tea]

me when i realize sundays coming out in approx. 2 weeks and thats what pushes me to lock tf in bc i need to play these events to build his funds 😭😭😭

[milksnake-tea]

Sunday

[milksnake-tea]

HEHE HI IM DOING GOOD !! currently screaming crying grovelling over my cat dad bass player uni student blade wip bc its gone over 4k words when it was supposed to be 1k but whats new 😔 hehe santa neuvie is here for another year bc i re-hired him 😌

BUT HBU?? HRU DOING??

IM DOING GREAT !!! fighitng thru midterms rn but. 😭😭😭 WE'RE SURVIVING !!! honestly the wip is so real im trying to get this hotel del luna au wip done before december comes but LORD ITS GETTING LONGGGG

[milksnake-tea]

if you receive this, you make somebody happy! send this to ten of your followers who make you happy or somebody you think needs cheering up. if you get one back, even better! ૮꒰◞ ˕ ◟ ྀི꒱ა

hi fellow dooms(un)day kisser

BELLLLLL im sorry im so late w answering this i keep forgetting i have an inbox BUT GRGRGRRRR SQUEEZES U AND SPINS U AROUND ILY

[milksnake-tea]

We get married, raise a pet army and attack hoyoverse for e6s5 sunday. Sound like a plan?

hell yeah im down