#consider this idea yoinked

[commaclear]

Listen my guy Phil over here is working overtime on these guys

Kristen where u at

Do my man a favor and let him sit beside someone at Tommy’s competition

Let him get excited and yell like a dad at a baseball game for Tommy’s robot and get nervous when she laughs

Then when Tommy comes up to him after and asks how he did, she interjects before Phil can say anything and tells Tommy how cool his robot was

And Tommy’s smart

And assumes he’s the prime matchmaker in the family and embarrasses Phil to the grave

Give this man a wife already he is a stressed mother hen rn

OH shit

YOINK

[kaiserouo]

uhh don't know who this is but looks like a civilian to me

[airenyah]

it's really funny seeing everyone salty posts about the hidden agenda finale and i actually agree with everyone but the thing is!!!! i'm just vibing!!!!

i went into this show with absolutely ZERO expectations (and in fact, i would have been extremely surprised if this show ended up being actually good dkfjkfddf), i've never given a single shit about the plot and/or the writing bc i came here for the joongdunk vibes and the joongdunk vibes alone and i had a blast watching this series

like, i'm not even gonna bother criticising this drama bc from the beginning i didn't expect it to be very impressive anyway and so i'll just keep sitting here in my pile of garbage and vibing with it <3333

[gridanian-red-mage]

A Nocturne for Heroes--Part 14/33

I love this.😂 And we have a Y'jhimei mention!✨✨ (She's super cute.)

[citrine-elephant]

mmm yes. story narrative developing.

the real reason leon's been MIA since re6? been held hostage in the spooky dungeon basement. he's escaping late 2025 - early 2026.

[4lph4kidz]

the problem with 'why don't you just make an oc' with homestuck specifically is that so much of what i like about homestuck's characters is reliant on the text to the point of being impossible to extricate or replicate. if i wanted i could absolutely take some of the elements i like to make ocs, and i probably will at some point, but it's not just the characters and their traits on their own, it's their place in and treatment by the text itself that is compelling to me

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

Is Cesar's torn poster Zero's doing?

Yes.

Was that an intentional detail?

No.

[tizeline]

Presenting: The AU I accidentally created OOPSIE!! 😬😬😬

And yes, I know, it's another Seperation AU, and yes YES, I KNOW, they're a bit overdone at this point, bUT LISTEN!! That's precisely how I ended up in this situation!!!

So there's a lot of Seperation AUs exploring a lot of different scenarios with the turtles being raised, well, seperately. I've seen quite a few of them at this point, and despite whatever the combination is when it comes to turtle + parental figure, I'm sure I'm not the only one who has noticed a pattern of specifically Donnie often being raised by a villain. Which makes sense, he has a tendency to put on this evil-mad-scientist-act in the show, so of course a lot of us want to see what Donnie would actually be like as a proper antagonist. But that just made me think think of the opposite possibility, of Donnie being the singular good guy while his brothers are all bad guys. Mind you, I'm sure SOMEONE must've thought of this concept before me, but I haven't seen it! So here we are!

In this AU (which doesn't have a name so don't ask!) Splinter only managed to yoink Donnie during The Incident™, so he ended up an only child, while Raph, Leo and Mikey were raised by Draxum. I also imagine Draxum being at least a decent dad considering the circumstances, so the kids he raised ended up with pretty similar personalities to what they have in canon.

Because of that we get Hero Donnie who acts all villainous cuz he's a total theaterkid, and Villain Raph, Leo and Mikey who act all heroic cuz they honestly believe they're doing the right thing in literally destroying all of humankind and as a result developed an intense case of main character syndrome.

Anyway here's some references-

I don't know how far I'll explore this AU. I fully intended to just make like one or two posts rambling about the basic concept, but when I was drawing these images my brain went into full Brain Blast mode and I started coming up with a bunch of other ideas so uh... we'll see how this turns out later I guess haha

[obsessivevoidkitten]

Ghosted

Male Jock Yandere Ghost x Gender Neutral Nerd Ghost Reader

CW: Reader death, ghosts, spirit world, manipulative yandere, stalking, general yandere behavior, consensual sex

Word Count: 801

(Trying to get back into the habit of writing, this is the result, hope you like it! I consider a demented ghost as still being a monster and therefore still teratophilia.)

You had died in college. One moment, you were being your nerdy self, rummaging through your binder, and the next, you were on the ground. You didn't really remember much, all very fuzzy. Was it a stroke? A brain aneurysm? You had no idea.

Once you were brain dead, though, you stepped from your body and appeared on the ghostly plane. A fog filled realm that somewhat mirrored the world of the living. Though spirits could make alterations, there were spaces untouched by the activities of the still living. 

There were a lot of ghosts. Many of them wandered aimlessly or were stuck in a loop of denial, acting out behaviors as if they were still alive. Others lashed aggressively, unable to regain their grip on their sanity. 

You mostly kept to yourself. Like Jonesy taught you. He was a former jock about your age when he died in the late 80s. He still wore his letterman jacket. You weren't limited to the clothes you died in, but you figured it was a symbol of how he was still attached to his old life.

Jonesy had taught you a lot of things. He had pretty much been your mentor since you had died. He was there waiting when you passed. He said he had sensed someone might die as he was wandering the halls of the college, where he had also died years ago. 

Jonesy said he was stuck in a loop. Being alone had made him lose his mental stability. But when he sensed you were about to die, it snapped him out of it. He said you saved him, so he wanted to get to know you and help you navigate the land of the dead. 

Plus, being together would help prevent the two of you from getting mentally frail. 

It was a bit of a paradox. Jonesy taught you to avoid most spirits, but communication and relationships were essential to staying sane. 

"You just have to know the right types to befriend. Many of the people here have a darkness in them and can drag you down if you're not careful."

He also told you the other secret to remaining stable. 

"You have to keep busy, do stuff. Don't get too bored."

There was a surprising amount you could do as a ghost. You could go to stores and yoink whatever you wanted, eat whatever you wanted, play video games, there was even a ghost version of the internet! 

Getting infinite free popcorn at the movies was your favorite thing. Jonesy always did that lame pretend yawn thing that ended with his arm wrapped around you. It was nice, though. Made you feel safe. You had been touch starved in life.

The transition to him being your boyfriend was so seemless and natural that you barely noticed that it had happened. You had never stopped any of his advances. Cuddling you, holding you, and smooching your cheek.

You didn't even question it when chaste kisses led to him kissing you hungrily before carefully taking off your clothing, like he was removing the wrapping from something delicate. 

Soon you found yourself laying ass up on his bed with him pounding into you, drinking in all your lusty moans and unabashed calling of his name.

He gripped your hips firmly as he came deeply into you; the pleasure made you see stars. His girthy cock stretched you wonderfully. You felt so lucky and special that this jock spirit had taken an interest in you, a lowly nerd.

Jonesy felt lucky too. He hadn't been in a loop. For a year before your death, he had been haunting you, It was difficult to peek into the living world, but once he found you, he was addicted. 

He loved watching you read books, study, and watch anime. He especially loved watching you shower, fervently jerking hinself off as he did so. 

It wasn't enough though. He needed to have you with him! You had been so perfect for him. You were kindred souls in a way. You were always alone and starved for attention. You'd fall for his affections easily, and you wouldn't just crossover beyond the purgatory the two of you were now in, you were too depressed for that.

Influencing people who were still alive was nearly impossible, but decades of being alone had made Jonesy angry and bitter. He used those emotions as fuel and tried many times to trip you down the stairs or get you to stroll into traffic absentmindedly. Finally, the jock was successful in busting something in your head.

At long last, you were with him. As he held you tightly, after making love several more times, he knew he'd be able to keep you there forever and he'd never have to be alone again. 

[the-s1lly-corner]

Calling various CRP pretty boy

Yoinking this prompt from the slasher version of this post because i kind of enjoy this prompt a more than normal amount and I like feeding all my followers regardless of what fandom they follow me for

Characters: Slenderman, Masky, Hoodie, Ticci Toby, Eyeless Jack, Laughing Jack, Jeff the Killer

Notes: reader is GN, written on mobile

CWs: none

SLENDERMAN

He gives little to no reaction to you, as expected as a lot of forms of affection dont mean all that much to him

Not that he doesn't treat you with love and care, he does because he knows you like it

Receiving is just a little odd for him, possibly because it's so foreign to him- but at least he doesn't reject you!

Asides from his lack of response, there isnt much else to note! Over time he does begin to respond to it if you keep calling him that

MASKY

He doesnt talk all that much so the lack of verbal response doesnt surprise you all that much

He prefers being called handsome, if you insist on saying something about his looks

Mild confusion because hes never taken his mask off around you, the most hes done is lift it up to eat or kiss but even then...

Suspicious that you've peeked when he wasnt aware or conscious- probably not the best nickname

HOODIE

Doesnt talk at all, so once more the lack of verbal response doesnt come as a surprise

You haven't seen his face yet you call him pretty boy... you might actually be able to convince him to take his mask off for you so you can confirm if he really is a pretty boy

He does respond to the name and seems to at least enjoy it a little bit

Will occasionally ignore you until you call him pretty boy, not a common occurence though

TICCI TOBY

Mix of leaning into the name and calling you pretty in return, but I can also see him slightly rejecting it

He knows you mean it, more than likely- but hes so used to not being treated nicely that he cant tell if you're secretly making fun of him or not

Brings it up passively and hides it behind jokes but it's so obvious hes a little suspicious of you

Firmly reassure him that you really do think hes pretty, bonus if you point out specific parts of his face that you like!

EYELESS JACK

He considered himself average before the cult, nowadays he cant look in the mirror... though that's less of a self confidence thing and more of a trauma thing

He has mixed feelings about being called pretty boy, in general and due to the circumstances

Let's you continue calling him pretty boy, quietly keeps his thoughts to himself

He may grow onto it with enough time

LAUGHING JACK

Giddy, he already has the idea that hes cute but the thought that you think hes pretty really does it for him

Returns the energy and says he thinks you're really cute, he could just eat you up!

Takes the sudden nickname really well and adopts it as a new pet name between the two of you

He kind of perks up like a dog when you say a word they like around them

JEFF THE KILLER

Honestly he would expect you to call him pretty boy, though be doesnt need to remind you of something he already knows as fact

Pretty, handsome, cute, beautiful... call him any of those and hes going to let you know he already knew he was attractive

WILL notice if you stop calling him pretty boy, making it a habit... and you just stop calling him that out of the blue

A little huffy about it but hes going to act like hes not pressed about it- he doesn't want to come off as desperate for attention

[tinfoil-jones]

Jerk Ford AU: The Worst Timeline

Out of all the scenarios and alternate timelines / other AU's this one could cross over into or adopt elements from (You can see a Reverse Portal Scenario Here and Here), the worst and most destructive alternate timeline for Jerk Ford would be Drifting Stars.

If you don't know, Drifting Stars is a popular AU where during the events of Not What He Seems, Mabel goes through the portal instead of Ford coming out. And now Mabel and Ford are together in the multiverse.

Stanley never stopped being involved with family because he was never kicked out, so Mabel and Dipper have actually known their Grunkle Stan their whole lives, they've even visited him a fair few times and stayed over, the summer that the events of the show takes place in is just the first time they stayed for an entire summer.

Imagine if, about five years before the show starts, little 7-8 year old Mabel falls into the bottomless pit and somehow gets ejected to the only other thing out in the multiverse with the same dimensional signature as her; Jerk Ford, her great uncle who has been missing for twenty five years.

Jerk Ford sees this crying little kid and he takes pause because, for one thing what is a kid doing in Mystery Flesh Pit National Park in the Body Horror Dimension, and another thing why does she have an eerie resemblance to his nephew, who was only ten years old the last time that he saw him?

Jerk Ford at first was considering leaving her to the lost and found at the tourist outpost of the national park, but then she called him "Grunkle Stan." (Because she is mistaking him for Stanley, and Grunkle why did you cut your hair?) And it's all over.

Jerk Ford, a multidimensional space hobo vagabond who has been trying to get home for the past twenty five years at this point and has had absolutely no contact with his family for obvious reasons, he just goes YOINK THIS IS MINE NOW.

And why is this the worst timeline for the Jerk Ford AU?

You know that scene in the Lion King when Rafiki is holding up Simba to the valley? Well, imagine Jerk Ford doing the same thing with Mabel. Except she's like this:

Because Jerk Ford already has poor impulse control when it comes to pettiness without his brother to reign him in, and now he has Mabel who is a very similar brand of unhinged as he is, they're just subjecting the entire multiverse to a path of glittery destruction the likes have which have never been seen before and will hopefully never be repeated.

Jerk Ford was already wilding all on his own now he has Mabel who has so many ideas. And she has this pathetic, lonely man wrapped around her little finger.

Also, Jerk Ford is a known runner. He does not fight if he doesn't see himself winning, and he'll usually go out of his way to not kill people. He just lacks the trigger-happy 'shoot now journal about it later'-gene that most Fords have. (He has very specific exceptions)*

But in a scenario where he has Mabel? Where he isn't facing consequences all by himself? He isn't letting anything in the multiverse so much as breathe rudely in her direction. So now, he isn't just some jerk or mostly harmless nuisance, he is stacking bodies (not in Mabel's line of sight, obviously).

The (Jerk) Ford Hate Club is besides themselves. Now, stopping or killing Jerk Ford isn't their only prerogative, they also need to 'rescue' this small, innocent child from The Worst Ford and his influence. Unaware that the terrible-flavoured beanboozled jellybeans that keep making their way into their catering were all her idea.

When Jerk Ford and Mabel return in 2012, Dipper is besides himself because, sweet Moses his sister is alive! She's really alive!

But she's been with with The Author who he hates, and being raised by him for the past five years has had obvious effects on her development.

She's still happy go lucky and nice, she's not a jerk at all like her Grunkle Ford.

But she's basically a supervillain who is on the FBI's Most Wanted List in every dimension she's been to that has one, and some organizations both official and criminal consider her a bigger threat than Jerk Ford (relative to body size).

Her sunny disposition did not change at all; she's blowing up whole buildings with a damn smile on her face

It's terrifying. This is the worst Jerk Ford timeline.

*While he was in the multiverse, instead of celebrating Jewish holidays the traditional way there was no point without his family, he would travel to different parallel Earth dimensions to kill Nazi’s. He would try to be a little more traditional, and halt the killing spree while he had Mabel with him, she was too young for murder.

[hajihiko]

Why do you think specifically Fuyuhiko took a part of Junko? It makes sense why Mikan and Nagito would, but even under the influence of despair I kinda struggle with the motivation Fuyuhiko would have to remove his own eye and replace it. That is, unless he considered Junko a part of him somehow. I think it may be similar to how he promises Hajime half of his life, albeit also very different. I thought it would be fun to hear your thoughts on this!

I think about it lots but it boils down to 3 things that are actually just 1 thing

He wanted to see 'her vision' and got a little weird with it (seen other ppl say this, not my idea)

He's always known he doesn't have what it takes to be ruthless (too soft) and point 1 was a frantic attempt to prove himself wrong

He's just a little insane about the people he loves! Who knows, if Peko or Hajime beefed it and he was in a bad enough mental state he might yoink something of theirs too

Why him and not some other character? Well because he's in the 2nd most important character role besides protag/antag i mean because he had a narratively convenient injury already.

(My non-fiction theory is that they actually did not think that deep about who took what where and just said 'well Fuyuhiko lost an eye in the game so maybe use that idk')

[inbabylontheywept]

maybe a book idea in here or something i dunno

When South Africa requested that its nuclear weapons be disarmed, the response from the rest of the world was disbelief. The technology for isotopic separation was closely monitored, and South Africa had been very carefully blocked from obtaining it. No vendor would sell them centrifuges, nor anything necessary for gaseous diffusion, nor anything for the other half dozen novel ways of separating isotopes. 

But that didn't matter, because South Africa had simply invented an entirely new way of making a bomb.

It was a little more expensive than the centrifuge method, but actually cheaper than standard diffusion techniques. They'd run a stream of uraneous gas over an airfoil and apparently, there was a low pressure region that excelled in trapping the lighter isotopes. Pulled the U235 right out. No one else had considered the technology for it, and frankly, even attempting to ban it would have been difficult. Making a wing just isn't that hard. It seemed almost like a philosophical question right up until inspectors were shown the bombs. Then it was real. Then the world really believed. 

The weapons were handed off to be voluntarily disarmed, and the rest of the world asked South Africa to please, pretty please, keep their technique secret. 

And thankfully, they have. 

---

I don't understand the mechanics of LIS, but I think that's the point. Their research was classified once it became clear that their technique was at least an order of magnitude cheaper than standard isotope separation techniques. All I know is that it involves Australians and lasers. 

Their work wasn't a huge breakthrough because fuel price has never been what held nuclear energy back - but it was interesting for other reasons. They remain, in theory, the cheapest method of isotope refinement.

---

There are more novel isotope separation techniques than just these two. But they work for my point. 

I think it's just going to get cheaper and easier to build nukes. Worse, the invasion of Ukraine has made two points absolutely crystal clear. 

First: If you have nuclear weapons, never, ever give them up. 

Second: If you don't have nuclear weapons, get them. You won't be safe until you do.

I actually see this as the start of a new wave of colonialism. We already determine if a country is first, second, or third world by who their nuclear allies are. Eventually, statehood itself will be determined by the presence of a nuclear arsenal. Anyone who has some gets a seat at the negotiation table. Anyone who doesn't is up for grabs.

Yoink.  

But even this is just one point in the journey towards nuclear proliferation. 

The worst is yet to come. 

---

Imagine that you live in a newly conquered satellite of the Neo-Russian Empire. No outside country is coming to save you. Their cities are just targets for nuclear bombs. They have far too much to lose by playing stupid games - so they don't. The peace between states is terrifying, but strong. 

But the peace between conquered peoples and their conquerors is not. 

How easy does it have to be, for one group to get a nuclear bomb? Would it be money? Would it be connections? Would it be their own internal skill sets? At what point do the fragments of some conquered nation cobble together a nuclear weapon? 

A nuclear bomb detonates in St. Petersberg. A resistance group/terror cell immediately takes credit. What does Russia do? How does it retaliate? It only takes one bomb to destroy a city. Millions of lives. Trillions of dollars. All gone. One bomb. And no enemy city to fire back on. 

Nuclear weapons do not favor states. States can be retaliated against at scale. Nuclear weapons favor anarchists and terrorists and revolutionaries - small groups that can hide safely inside their foes. And once that rubicon is crossed, something new happens: Society's fundamental benefit is suddenly gone. There is no more strength in numbers. For the first time in human history, it is more dangerous to be near people than it is to be alone. 

And what is an empire, if not millions of people, huddled close? 

---

I don't know what will happen after that. 

Maybe the world burns and everyone dies. Maybe states just fall apart, and people retreat to small communities, to live in anxious peace. Maybe it all turns into a feudal hell, where warlords wander in groups too large for passerby to defeat easily, but too small to be worth nuking.

Can you imagine that kind of perpetual fear? Keeping your group large enough to defend itself, but small enough to not be a target? That feeling of always being watched? Fermi imagined the Dark Forest as a solution to why we don't find aliens - maybe they're too busy hiding from us. But what if it happens sooner than that? What if the reason we don't find aliens is because they're hiding from themselves? What if every species winds up like this - sitting in the ashes of their once great cities, remembering how much easier it is to destroy than it is to build? What if that's just what Life always winds up doing?

I don't know. But I think about it a lot. 

[11queensupreme11]

Let's say in an alternate universe, Percy, due to the Bifrost and Kronos is sent a few thousand years in the past before canon for due to still having the curse of Achilles, crash-lands in the past, right into Shiva’s palace unharmed and confused but tries to be polite, unknowingly charming Shiva and his wives despite being wary of her aura, which feels a lot like Poseidon's. Though Percy doesn't fully understand what kind of gods they are, she adopts a sweet, innocent “uwu” behavior, which draws them in even more. They briefly consider sending her back to Poseidon but ultimately decide to keep her for themselves, as their feelings grow stronger. Percy, oblivious, doesn’t catch on until they outright tell her how they feel.Years later, Percy becomes Shiva’s fourth wife, living in a mostly polyamorous relationship with Shiva and his three wives despite the fact that Shiva and his wives are huge yanderes of her. At some loint she ascends to godhood, she becomes a goddess of many things, including humanity, and gods from all over are drawn to her. Shiva and his wives constantly fend off suitors, though Percy’s obliviousness only adds to the chaos. Poseidon who finds out about Percy after she marries Shiva is not happy about it, asume in this au he is a platonic yandere, was not thrilled about Shiva being her husband due to not meeting his standards of perfection that and he just hated his personality but despite that he ends up caring for Percy and keeps an eye on her nonetheless.Then, during Ragnarok, the gods vote to destroy humanity, and Shiva, to Percy’s shock, votes in favor of it. Percy finds out, probably through Brunhilde, and confronts Shiva, accusing him of betrayal. This sparks a huge argument and leaves Percy heartbroken. She leaves the palace, swearing to fight for humanity. Shiva’s wives try to stop her. Durga takes a harsh approach, reminding Percy that she belongs to them not humanity, while Kali and Parvati are gentler, reminding Percy of the love they share and the happy memories they had together even pointing out that even if Shiva voted no it wouldn't change anything. Despite their words softening her, Percy stays determined.Meanwhile, the gods scramble to find someone who can defeat Percy. Most refuse because they either like or love her or fear Shiva and Poseidon. The only one crazy enough to fight her is Loki how do you think things go from here

lmao i love reading time travel/isekai fics where percy gets yoinked somewhere by kronos cuz that sort of start-up genuinely makes the most sense for how the poor kid would get in the general setting in the first place 😂😂

and omggggggggg you have no IDEA how much i thirst at thought of SHIVAAAAAA 😫 i would love a shiva x percy (what would their ship name be? shercy??? but then we'd have to add the wives, and the name combo would be too long.... indian ocean???? LMAO 😭)

"while Kali and Parvati are gentler, reminding Percy of the love they share and the happy memories they had together even pointing out that even if Shiva voted no it wouldn't change anything" OH THAT'D BE A BIG MISTAKE FOR KALI AND PARVATI TO SAY TBH

cuz yeah it's true that their votes wouldn't have changed anything, but it's the fact that they voted YES in the first place!!!!!! she is a mortal!!!! she's half-human! she was raised amongst them and loves and cares for them! the trio know that and yet STILL voted for their destruction!!!! it's the realization that they hate such a big part of her that hurts 💔💔💔

as for loki vs percy, ohhhhh this would actually be SO perfect if loki loved her here too lmao. why, you ask??? because lets say in this au percy also discovers the ichor/ambrosia thing and uses that in her fight. LOKI WOULD GET SO HORNY THE SECOND SHE STARTS DRINKING AND EATING FROM HIM 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 HE WOULD LITERALLY LOSE THE FIGHT FROM HORNY-NESS ALONE

so percy wins, and so does loki in a way, but now he's got shiva, kali, durga, parvati, AND the greek pantheon on him cuz everyone DEFINITELY saw how down bad he was, the tournament is LIVE after all 😭😭

[tired-and-ticklish]

The Dangers Of Bows

Disclaimer: This is a tickle fic, so if that isn’t your thing, then just ignore this. 

Summary: Angel Dust likes pulling pranks. He really should have thought about his plan to prank Alastor a bit more thoroughly.

TW: Tickling (maybe a bit intense?), Restraints, Swearing, Mentions of Cannibalism, Angel Dust being Angel Dust.

Inspiration: This video

In Angel Dust’s defense, he thought it wouldn’t work.

In Angel’s defense, he thought someone would have stopped him.

In Angel’s defense, he thought Alastor would have noticed sooner.

In his defense, he had not expected the Overlord to be that distracted when talking with Rosie. The Cannibal Overlord had come to the hotel to get a good look at the new ‘business venture’ the Radio Demon had taken interest in. Apparently, talking to her put Alastor in such a good mood, he almost forgot where he was for a moment, and thus, didn’t feel the spider demon tie a bow around his tail.

Angel hadn’t even been aware Alastor even had a tail, until Niffty mentioned it off-handedly one day. That gave the spider an idea for a small prank, just a small one. Alastor also liked pranks, sure, but Angel didn’t want to end up double dead. Despite what people may think, he isn’t that stupid.

Or maybe he is, considering he went through with the prank, even though most of his instincts told him it was a terrible idea. He had waited until one of the rare days Alastor wasn’t wearing his trademark coat, and thus, his little deer tail was on full display. The Radio Demon only did this in the presence of Rosie, considering they had been friends for who knows how long.

“Certainly not as long as me and Al’!” Mimzy had said once.

The spider demon had honestly thought Alastor would have noticed his presence sooner, or caught onto Angel’s plans quicker. Hell, he was pretty sure Rosie had even seen him sneaking up on the deer, and yet, she didn’t say anything. Maybe she was curious as to how this would all turn out.

What Angel failed to remember was Alastor’s own shadow, which was almost like having a second Radio Demon. As soon as the bow was tied on, the spider let out a startled noise as Alastor’s shadow grabbed him, pulling him down and restraining Angel to the floor.

“My, you must have a double-death wish.” Alastor said calmly, looking over to the pinned pornstar. “Sneaking up on me while I’m having a conversation with an old friend?”

Angel let out a nervous chuckle. “Alright, you caught me Al.” He said, holding his hands up placatingly. “Dumbass move on my part, I know-”

“He tied a bow to your tail.” Rosie interrupted, casually sipping the tea Charlie had made.

Slowly, Alastor turned his head around to check if what his companion was saying was true. Angel had forgotten that the Radio Demon could turn his head like an owl, it being completely turned as he looked at his own tail. Sure enough, there was a bright pink, sparkly bow tied to the deer tail. Alastor’s head snapped back toward Angel’s direction, the pornstar instantly filled with dread.

“And you didn’t think to warn me beforehand?” He asked Rosie, incredulous.

“I think it’s cute~” She teased.

“A-Al, we can talk about this, r-right?” Angel pleaded, trying to crawl away. “I-It’s just a little joke, you know?”

Alastor seemed to consider this, scratching his chin in thought. “Well, my arachnid acquaintance, if you desired a laugh, you simply needed to ask.”

Before Angel could question what the Radio Demon meant, he saw it. The mischievous glint in Alastor’s eyes as he kneeled by the trapped spider. His shadow yoinked Angel’s arms upward, giving the deer easy access to his worst spots. Angel’s eyes widened, shaking his head frantically.

“W-Wait wait wait! Y-You don’t have to do this Al!” The nervous smile was already starting to form on his face.

“Do what~?” Alastor asked, before poking the spider’s sides. “I’m not doing anything.”

Angel bit his lip, trying to twist and turn away from the Radio Demon’s hands. It was useless, of course, as Alastor’s shadow held the spider firmly in place. The deer poked and prodded at Angel’s sides, his claws slowly, torturously tracing over the spot.

“Ah ah ah.” Alastor tutted when he noticed the spider biting his lip. “Why are you resisting now? You wanted a laugh, so I’m giving you one!”

“A-Ahahahal Ahahal I’m sohhohohorry! I-Ihihihih’ll lehehheeave yoohohohu aloohohohone!” Angel pleaded.

“You should have thought about that before, Angel.” Alastor chuckled.

Rather than go right for the spider’s worst spot, the Radio Demon decided to go for his own personal favorite spot: the ribs. He started at the top, just close enough to Angel’s armpits to get him nervous, before slowly dragging his claws down, tickling each rib with feather-like touches that made Angel lose it.

“S-Smihihihihles plehehehehease!”

“Sorry Angel.” Alastor said, not at all apologetic. “I am a cannibal, I just have to go for your ribs!”

Angel was about to let out another protest or plea, when he squealed as he felt a second set of hands tickling his stomach. He was regretting his decision to wear a crop top that day. Alastor raised an eyebrow, looking over and spying Rosie, who had her own grin.

“Oh Alastor, don’t you know the best part is the stomach?” Rosie asked, digging her nails into the spider’s fluffy belly.

“Really? Again with this discussion, Rosie?” Alastor asked, amused. “Ribs are the far superior meal.”

“Oh please, just look at how soft and tender the stomach is!”

Angel was losing his mind! Both Overlords were tickling him and acting like he wasn’t even there! He sputtered as he felt the Cannibal Overlord drag a finger slowly up the pink streak on his stomach.

“See? This one even comes with his own outline for where we could cut! Just open up this sensitive little belly~”

“Please, he’s so thin, I highly doubt his stomach would be of any value.”

Honestly, most people would be panicking from two cannibals talking about eating them or cutting open their stomach, but Angel knew that if Alastor really wanted to eat him, he wouldn’t bother with tickling him first. That just wasn’t who Al was, he wasn’t someone to give his victims comfort before eating them.

What Angel was panicking about was how close Rosie’s finger was getting to where his belly button would be. Before he could even attempt to beg, she dug right in.

“SHHIHIHIHIT SHIHIHIHIT!”

“See, Alastor? Listen to those little squeals!” Rosie teased.

Alastor let out his own amused chuckle. “Surely you’re joking. I think he’ll scream louder if I do this~”

Without warning, Alastor’s claws dig right into the top of the spider’s ribs, making him howl with laughter. Angel tried to squirm away, pull his arms down, anything to try to block out the sensations, but the Radio Demon’s shadow held firm. All the spider could do was kick his legs out, the only part of him not restrained currently.

“P-PLEHEHEHEASE PLHEHEHEASE IHIHIHIH’M SOHOHOHOHOHRRY!”

“You know, Angel, it’s rather rude to interrupt a conversation.” Alastor hummed. “Did no one teach you any manners?”

“Guess we’ll have to help him with that~” Rosie teased.

She ceased her tickling, allowing Angel to slightly catch his breath, still laughing as Alastor’s hands stayed at his ribs. The pornstar then felt Rosie hold onto his waist, his eyes widening as he realized what she was about to do. He pleaded, shaking his head as Rosie lowered her own toward his stomach.

“W-Wahahahit wahhahait dohohoohn’t!”

Angel’s pleas fell on deaf ears as Rosie blew a raspberry right into his stomach, making him squeal so loud, Alastor thought the whole hotel might hear. The Radio Demon hummed, deciding to show a little bit of mercy and cease tickling Angel’s ribs, allowing the pornstar to only focus on Rosie’s torment.

“I wonder if Husker knows about this little weakness of yours, Angel?” Alastor teased, humming a bit. “A few little raspberries and you’re practically a mess!”

Angel couldn’t help but blush as Alastor said that. The idea of Husk finding out how well raspberries worked on him making the spider both terrified and excited. He kind of hoped Alastor would tell the bartender, it’d save Angel the embarrassment of telling Husk himself. He was pulled out of those thoughts by another raspberry, and a few nibbles to his stomach.

As both Overlords noticed Angel’s laughter start to sound desperate, Rosie stopped her onslaught. Alastor snapped his fingers, his shadow releasing it’s hold, allowing the spider to curl up on himself, rubbing the spots where a few phantom tickles lingered.

“I do hope this goes without saying.” Alastor said, leaning near Angel’s face. “But I trust Rosie’s visit won’t be interrupted anymore?”

“Y-Yeah, yeah, no more interruptions.” Angel said, catching his breath.

“Delightful!” Alastor said, before getting up and dusting himself off. He held out a hand to help Rosie up.

“Aww, don’t be too upset Alastor.” Rosie hummed, taking Alastor’s hand. “He’s such a cute little thing! No wonder Husker likes him~” She teased, leaning down and pinching Angel’s cheek slightly.

‘Little thing’ was ironic, considering Angel was the tallest person in the hotel. The way Rosie complimented/teased him was… weird, but nice. Like a mother or aunt teasing you about your crush. While Angel pushed himself up, Alastor snapped his fingers, the bow the spider tied around his tail now on said spider’s head.

“Pink isn’t really my color.” Alastor hummed.

“Were you more mad about the color than anything?” Angel asked, not putting it past the Radio Demon.

Alastor chuckled. “Not particularly. If it was blue like a certain Television, then, well, I wouldn’t have been as kind.” He said with a threatening grin.

Message heard, loud and clear. Don’t put anything blue on Alastor.

“Now then!” The Radio Demon said, turning to the Cannibal Overlord, holding out his arm for her “All of this has left me famished, shall we head out for a bite?”

“Oooh, you read my mind.” Rosie said, her smile full of teeth as she hooked her arm around Alastor’s, allowing the deer to lead her out of the hotel.

Alastor snapped his fingers one more time, his coat materializing onto him and covering his tail once more.

[floofanflurr]

How would you feel about an AU that has Papyrus being Toriel's Door Buddy instead, and is the one that promised to protect Frisk (and unlike Sans, Papyrus does a decent job)? ;)

I'm now trying to figure out if you are an anon that's in my discord server, because otherwise the timing of this ask is INSANE, considering when this ask came in I was just talking about the absolute crack ship pairing of PapyrusxToriel (Torius) in order to have Mom times two. (Goat mom plus skelemom)

...ON THAT NOTE, I FREAKING LOVE THAT IDEA HOLY S H I T. Stars, i freaking love this concept so much?!?!?!??!?! ITS BRILLIANT. Is this a "there's a fic/AU like this out there and i'm reccing it" suggestion or a "hey you wanna write this" suggestion? ...BECAUSE IF ITS THE SECOND I HIGHKEY WANNA ADD IT TO MY PROMPT LISTS.

(Okay i rambled a lot more than i expected - sticking it under a cut)

Stars, I love it so much. I can just picture Papyrus running into Toriel - I do wonder - she would probably have to be the one to initiate the knock knock joke. But Papyrus would absolute keep coming back to humor her - both because he's lonely, but also because she reminds him of his brother in the worst (best) way. And then he would have another friend to add to his very, very short list, and Toriel would have consistent company and the best kinds of reactions (because what pun lover DOESN'T love getting groans in exchange for bad jokes?)

i wonder what kinds of conversations would pop up...? Because Papyrus is quite loud about his desire to be in the royal guard - and to capture a human. Would Toriel still bring up the promise in the same way? Would she be reluctant to befriend him? Perhaps she would, quite scathingly, decry the murder of children -human or otherwise - and force Papyrus to confront exactly what the guard does.

And the potential of Papyrus and Toriel being the ones to meet first and how that could play out- they're both such desperately lonely people. Their dynamic could also have some interesting things at play with Toriel's tendency to mother and smother, and Papyrus's existing experience with that with Undyne. Would Toriel smother him? How would that play out? Would Papyrus every confront her about it?

And, even with this interesting dynamic, inevitably, Papyrus would agree to her request to protect the human in a heartbeat, honestly. One of his very few friends asking him that? He would probably struggle with the idea at first, since this is directly opposed to Undyne (similarly to how he struggles in the game after he befriends frisk) but ultimately i think he would still lean immediately to protect, and therefore would agree to the promise. And then, of course, we get to Frisk actually showing up. He really would do a great job! I think he would still lead them through his puzzles, and we honestly might even still get a battle if he phrases it as training - but he would up and yoink frisk out of any Encounters before their HP got too low. Conflict resolution of the distinctly non-murdery kind!

Then we get waterfall....

I wonder if Papyrus would try to pull something a la "How to Protect a Human from Your Murderous Best Friend"? Would he lie? Would he try to sneak Frisk through? Would he fight Undyne...? Would he try to reason with her...? Reverse psychology a la Undyne date but early (and not nearly as effective without Frisk having spared her already)???

And the amount of Frisk and Papyrus interaction I could fit in!!! ALL the dad Papyrus content!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gosh I freaking love this idea so much. There's so much to consider!!! SO MANY WAYS IT COULD GO!

...and of course, i could fit in my crackship pair of Torius.

...I may come back to this later and actually plan it out better if this isn't already a thing.