#cin reads stuff

[cin425]

Haiji continues to think the most romantic thoughts possible

[jesncin]

A Queer and Asian review of Xanthe Zhou + Spirit World

I haven't exactly been thorough about how I specifically feel about Xanthe Zhou as "representation" for people like me and a part of me didn't want to be too harsh since they're a fan favorite and I'm sure the writer did their best and what not- but there is this sense of "I'm not even whelmed I'm underwhelmed" by Xanthe as a character. I don't dislike them, but I can't say I'm a fan if I don't find them particularly interesting.

I'm sure for a lot of people the idea of a Chinese non-binary anime sword wielding, bomber jacket wearing, shaved cut having, envoy between the living and spirit world character is a novel concept. But when you've lived the reality this character attempts to represent (ghosts and spirits are a tuesday where I'm from) and have sought out that representation from within your own communities, Xanthe pales in comparison like a really corporate product. So I want to talk about intersectional storytelling and what a holistic queer Asian superhero could look like.

Again I'm aware Spirit World was written by a queer Chinese author (+ an all Chinese team) and as a fellow author who has to navigate mainstream publishing and deal with attempts at sandpapering authenticity for capitalism I want to stress that I Get The Struggle. But I'm allowed to be critical of how the final product turned out. Some of this is subjective musing even.

Here's the premise of Xanthe Zhou's character: When Xanthe was a very tiny kid, they were run over by a car when they were walking alone at night in the rain. They're resurrected by a powerful spirit called Po Po to be the half-dead, half-living Envoy of the Spirit World.

Everything about Xanthe is exhaustively corporate for me. Like industry planted representation designed to be as safe as possible and attempts at being intersectional are limited. Spirit World features Cassandra Cain Batgirl and John Constantine Hellblazer because that's how we get Asian and queer DC fans to hop onto out new queer Asian character! Xanthe doesn't get to stand out in their own world, or have an established cast system the way Kong Kenan gets to. Spirit World suffers from being a follow up to an Event comic, with all these characters crossing over- but it didn't rise to the challenge of including Batgirl and Johnstantine in meaningful ways. The story would've been better if they were replaced by characters unique to Xanthe's cast system.

I've become pretty cynical about scenes like this one. It's a scene where Xanthe is forcefully invited to have dinner with their family they haven't seen in years. The transphobic dinner pages made rounds on social media because "ooh look at John Constantine gendering a non-binary person correctly even when Xanthe's family keeps misgendering them", and "whoa even the magic system respects a trans person's name". It's free marketing, you can see comments on these posts asking what comic this is from to read more. People will start discourse over "Constantine going woke" and the defenders will pull up receipts that "John has always been a lefitst" and so on and so forth. I saw the promos for Spirit World, but these panels were what piqued my interest early on.

My twin and I were taking turns reading Spirit World- Jes asked Cin (who finished reading first) "so what about that transphobic dinner scene? Was it there? Are there other scenes that talk about it?" and Cin said "nope that's it. The rest is magic fight scenes and spirit world stuff." And honestly that feels calculated. It's like that Jenny Nicholson Star Wars Hotel thing: "whoa if they have this droid and this animatronic alien performer, imagine what else they have!" but nope. That's it. Just enough to fit in a tik tok promo. Just enough to fit in a tweet and make rounds. It's not like Alan Scott's Green Lantern solo, where his queer identity isn't limited to one scene designed to go viral. The whole narrative holistically discussed what it was like to be a gay man in that era. Spirit World on the other hand felt like it had a representation quota to fulfill before moving on to the generic Superhero Stuff- an entirely separate plot.

Then there's Xanthe and John. As a Hellblazer purist I already knew this was going to be a hard read for me since I'm not a fan of DC!Constantine but I've talked before about how Spirit World still has that appeal for me because sometimes og Hellblazer is a pain to read as a person of color. Maybe I can enjoy the fantasy of Constantine being an ally to an Asian person instead of fetishizing them like he did in those old Vertigo comics (people love to leave that out when they're defending Constantine as an ally but whatever). And people kept talking about how this is an elder and younger queer friendship dynamic and I love those.

So where was that? Sure, John genders Xanthe correctly over transphobic dinner and comforts them afterwards. But nothing he says or does is specific to a queer elder. Any ally or character can say these things or do these gestures. He doesn't speak from personal experience about how "it gets better" or "I know what it's like" it's just. "yeah throwing up in Gotham is great I do it all the time". Excuse me if I don't think that's substantial.

Ooh but the ghost of Johnstantine's ex boyfriend Oliver showed up! And then there was a bi joke about how John hooks up with a clone of himself a "dozen times" because he's such a slut amirite, gays. Diversity win. I expected bi jokes from DC!Constantine but marketing this as a queer narrative or generational friendship is a stretch.

Spirit World would've been a more holistic queer narrative if Wan Yujing, the villainous corrupted spirit that wanted to be remembered properly (or reincarnated, depends on the writer's mood)-was revealed to be a queer person. This would've been a fantastic opportunity to recontextualize Xanthe's personal transphobic encounter with their family into a larger systemic theme of queer historical erasure. The original meaning of a "dead name" is the idea that when a trans person dies, their family will put the wrong name on their grave. It's literally their "dead" name, erasing their legacy in writing. So why not include that in your conflict?

Wan Yujing is revealed to be a famous poet, slowly forgotten because "time erodes everything" (vague and bad writing btw). Why not pitch something more motivated and specific? Make it so that she wrote queer literature that was destroyed. Make it so that her lover was rewritten in history books as her "friend". Then when Xanthe makes the promise to remember Wan Yujing as she truly was, it'd be a holistic act of queer recognition and solidarity. But instead the resolution is just Xanthe Zhou promising "hey I'll remember you" and Wan Yujing just takes their word for it.

Can we talk about the huge missed opportunity of what this dialogue implies? Xanthe proclaims that they are both living and dead, granted the living's power to remember and the dead's immortality. Why was this not thematically paired with their experience as a non-binary person struggling in a cis-heteronormative world. Heck, why not pair this with how they're a queer Asian American, a perpetual foreigner wherever they go? Not Asian enough for traditional spaces, but not white enough for a majority of queer American spaces. Are we worried we'll scare off the white audience if this got too intersectional?

Xanthe gets more fleshed out under a different writer (Jeremy Holt) for one of the DC Pride stories (2023). Here, Xanthe talks about how being in the land of the living feels like going about a routinic obligation; "Reminding me that home isn't necessarily where the heart is". This is so much like the disassociated way trans people go about life before figuring themselves out. It's also like how a perpetual foreigner doesn't fit in anywhere. But it's not paralleled to that experience. The fantasy aspects of Xanthe Zhou the Envoy, are completely separate from the very few personal civilian parts of them. Like they're a Superhero first and a person second. The later half of this story gets overtaken by a team up with Batwoman, because once you have a new character set in Gotham you are at the whims of being absorbed into the greater Batfam conglomerate.

There's interesting concepts at the center of Xanthe's character. But it's hard to give credit to writing that doesn't follow any of that through. Xanthe's a hero motivated by making sure the dead are remembered and respected. That's a decent motivation in general, and a pretty resonant one for a queer hero-but everything surrounding the execution of that idea feels so half-assed to me. Xanthe's origin story has so many plot holes, it feels like it was thought up in 5 minutes.

Why was their death just some random car accident and not something more motivated? Why did the all powerful Po Po decide to resurrect them specifically? Where's the tension in any of the many excessive fight scenes in Spirit World, if Xanthe's apparently immortal? Also they age? What are the stakes for a character like this? This isn't even covering the shoddy writing for their transphobic family drama (Why did they just stalk their family after being resurrected? Why did their mom recognize them even though they've been gone and have aged for 15 years? so many questions ugh).

(why was this toddler walking around alone in the rain with their own umbrella. In Gotham. What is this-)

I casually propose that instead have Xanthe's origin be that they died as a runaway trans teen who went missing and was murdered. Maybe because the way police and society in general don't look into the disappearances of trans poc, Xanthe's death went completely unnoticed. Maybe as Xanthe's dying, Po Po sees their determination to fight for the forgotten and chooses to resurrect this kid specifically. Then we'd have a really motivated origin story that ties their identity to their heroism. Instead we get these over the top fantasy concepts + transphobic dinner with my talisman wielding mom.

Spirit World is a fun enough action fantasy with troubled pacing and generic MCU-quippy dialogue. It's so overwhelmed by it's own spectacle that we don't get a chance to get to know our new hero. What is Xanthe's character development? What flaw do they grow out of or overcome? If I'm honest outside of the attempt at quippy banter, what even is their personality? The ending is rushed; not only is the conflict resolved with Xanthe just promising to remember a dead poet, but they also make a deal to work with the Spirit World authorities. Because it's always so fun to watch queer people assimilate to the powers that oppress.

In one of these action sequences, I guess the writer decided there needed to be a semblance of themes to make it feel like the readers' time isn't being wasted. So while Cassandra Cain Batgirl from Detective Comics and John Constantine from Vertigo Hellblazer are holding the giant anime sword, Xanthe goes on an internal monologue about how change is natural and people's fears make them resistant towards it. Xanthe says that to embrace magic, "you need to look at everything you think you know about the way the world should be...and imagine something new."

It's a nice sentiment that isn't reinforced by anything else in the story, but it does make me think. What is "new" about Xanthe Zhou to someone like me who seeks out representation like this? I've seen queer characters with the shaved hairstyle, I've seen queer coded Asian girlies with the bomber jacket, heck I've even seen the giant anime sword. I kinda cringe at seeing "giant spiritual sword" at this point even. But you know what I don't see as often? In real life I've seen the bravest Asian queer people reclaim cultural hairstyles, clothing, practices and beliefs (that originally excluded them). I've seen them join communities and create entire subcultures and lingo in a way that would be unrecognizable to the typical queer readers who enjoy Hellblazer-but I certainly don't see it reflected in fiction a lot.

(Is it really new if I've seen it in a Disney movie)

The premise of a Chinese American non-binary half-dead-half-living Envoy for the dead is something so metaphysical in its intersectionality, world building, stakes and themes that it would require Sandman-levels of out-the-box creativity to pull off. Which is why getting a generic action adventure (+ one scene about transphobic dinner with the family) feels so disappointing. I wish Spirit World took its own words to heart; I wish it took everything we're used to, everything we've known about how the world is and dare to imagine something actually new.

[lace-sutures]

☆Everything seems to be in order...☆

✽ ᡣ𐭩ˋ°•*⁀➷ 🌸

Ah! Welcome, may I see your authorization? 🌷

✰✰✰ Everything seems to check out! Now, what was it you said you were here for again..? Right! My name is Cinema, but you can just call me Cinna or Cin. Please keep all personal belongings put away and we can begin with the tour of The Greenhouse! ✰✰✰

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚

As FishCity's botanist, I am set with the wondrous task of ensuring habitability and tending to the many plants. No, no.. They aren't for sale. Anyway! Feel free to explore on your own now if you'd like!

quick disclaimers and important info:

-i can and will draw selfship with my wife rise!donnie so if you dont want to see that, unfollow/block OR block the tag #selfship and you wont see any of it!

-my art requests are open

-interact with me! i swear i dont bite..(,,¬﹏¬,,)

Additional stuff to check out:

My pronouns and what to call me! 🌸 What's playing in my headphones? 🎧 700 DTIYS 🎨 #rottmnc - more coming! 🐈 #tmnt cin - me! 🎬 Donnie with other purple characters! 💜

Important people to know in FishCity:

The Mayor

The Train Conductor

Friend tags! (More TBA)

#corrupted file 📄- @mr-urple (big bro!!!) #ocean documentary 🪸 - @atomic-rattz (little bro...) #sweet n sour 🍋 - @hahawasabi #alien sighting 🛸 - @reddbug27

Navigation:

#rolling 🎥 (my art) #backstage 🎭 (my refs) #previews 🎞️ (ask replies) #talking during the movie {yapping) #5 stars 🌟 (reblogs) ------ #gifts 💌

boundaries and other stuff! ⇩(PLEASE READ BOUNDARIES BEFORE INTERACTING)

-> requests

i probably wont draw your oc

i wont do canon x YN requests unless i specify otherwise - i will deny/ignore you if you request it anyway. i understand you like the characters (i really do) but i just dont want to draw this kind of content as of now and i ask that you respect that.

...please dont beg or be pushy/send multiple asks with your request

if i havent responded to your request, i probably just dont want to do it or i do and am getting to it when i feel motivated

id prefer requests be primarily (rot)tmnt but if you want to request something related to any of my OTHER interests i wont mind（• ∇ ＜)

i am very obviously not going to be doing nsfw.

my commissions arent set up at the moment

the way that i personally do requests is that i get to them when i get to them. im most likely not ignoring you!!! i work at my own pace.

-> art usage

feel free to use my art as a pfp/banner etc (credit appreciated<3)

i dont mind if you repost as long as you credit me

do not edit/modify my art

do not use my art in edits

um.. i dont think this should be an issue but dont sell my art?

you can draw any of my designs but id prefer you didnt claim them as your own haha..please @ me if you do use anything id love to see it <3

-> boundaries

t/cest in/cest & proshippers fuck off. seriously, block me. this includes casey jr x turtles. dont joke about this shit either

^I do not count april but i probably wont draw any april x turtles anyway (he's married to me)

vivziepop (hazbin/helluva etc)

if you send me your art in my inbox and it doesnt pertain to me (like it just has nothing to do with me, just using me for clout?? idk its happened) i will probably answer privately. i love ur art but you cant just use me as a way to post it! if you want to show me something(again, if its just something unrelated and you want to show me)id prefer you tag me

i do not support ai art. if you support it or are neutral please block me. if you want to start making real art but dont know where to begin or need free resources, check out this post. (or this resource post)

if we're not close be mindful of what you send in my ask box lol. i am a minor. it makes me uncomfortable if youre sending me suggestive images or something like that (especially if i dont know you very well)

DO NOT VENT IN MY ASK BOX. i dont really know how to respond.. im witewawwy just a girl im not your thewapist im sowwy💔💔

i frequently call rise donnie my wife/bf & draw selfship (sometimes) so if that bothers you im sorry ;w; when i do draw selfship i try to tag it properly so it can be filtered !!!

im still an inexperienced artist, so i probably wont be able to give very good advice if you ask (ᵕ—ᴗ—)

feel free to tag me!

dms are open

-> other interests!

project sekai (if you want to play just ask for my id<3 im almost always up to it! i main jp but i do have en.)

vocaloid/utau/synthv & jpop

^ i am kakizaki yutas #1 fan !!!! listen to his music right now

hoyoverse (genshin, star rail, zzz, hi3)

little nightmares

skullgirls

YTTD

osomatsu san

metal family

bee and puppycat

jshk/tbhk

tadc

psych

ddlc

ptp

mitm

sotl

breaking bad

heathers the musical

...and more but this list is already getting long

stuff in here is subject to change! thank you so much for reading! (youd be surprised how many people dont)

[lilolilyr]

What Mando’a have you learned yet?

Heh I know I said on my rec list here that I remember 90 words and that was true at the time but because I take ages to reply to asks it's been a while, so let's see what I still remember now, I've mostly read clone wars fic lately, nothing with that much Mando'a...

Gonna try to structure this a bit to try and remember more. Also btw this is definitely just what I remember from what I've learned via fic reading osmosis, so take this with a grain of salt, for actual Mando'a knowledge there are a couple online dictionaries you could check out!

...I've spent 35 minutes trying to remember All The words xDxD fandom brainrot much lmao, why can't I get obsessed with like an actual useful language xD anyway lots of words below the cut, indeed over 90! Lots of words on weapons and family which tracks with Mandalorian culture xD but also a whole bunch of other random words!

Culture:

Mando'a - Mandalorian language, manda'yaim - planet Mandalore, mando'ade - mandalorians (children of Mandalore), Manda - the mandalorian Force (the council of fallen mandalorian warriors), kara - stars/the Force, jetii - Jedi, jetiise - Jedi plural, dar'jetii - darksider/sith, aruueti - outsider or traitor, dar'manda - no longer mandalorian, demagolka - monstrous criminal

Counting 10 words

Weapons and stuff:

Buy'ce - helmet, beskat - sword, beskar'gam - armor, kar'ta beskar - heart of the armor, jetii'kad - lightsaber, kom'rk - vambraces, hal'cabure - chest plate, cabur - guardian, arane - also guardian/protector? Not sure whether there's a difference, ramikad - fighter, ori'ramikaade - supercommandos, deece - gun

Counting 12 words

Family:

Aliit - family, ad - child(son/daughter), adiik - child, ikaad - baby/infant/toddler, vod(e) - sibling(s), buir(e) - parent(s), ad'vod - nibling, ba'vodu - aunt/uncle, ba'buir - grandparent

Counting 9 words

Romance:

Riduruuk - marriage (vows), riduur - spouse, cyare - beloved, cyar'ika - darling, copikla - cute

Counting 5 words

Jobs & skills:

Baar'ur: healer/medic, mir'baarur - therapist/mindhealer, hibir - student, baji - teacher, bajuri - teach/educate/raise, goran - blacksmith, alor - leader, mand'alor - mandalorian king

Counting 8 words

Body parts:

Shebs - ass, kar'ta - heart, tal - blood

Counting 3 words (and I can't believe I forgot the words for head and chest and limbs. Also a bunch of words are used for private parts but most of them I'm sure are made up slang like deece (gun) for dick so I won't count those xD)

Insults:

Dikut - idiot, mir'shebs - smartass, shabuir - motherfucker, din'la - crazy, hut'uun - (goddamn I can't speak English anymore. The opposite of brave???)

Counting 5 words

Places:

Yaim - home, kar'yai - living room, Khedabe - keep/city of Keldabe, khi'khedabe - little Keldabe (the enclave on Coruscant), Coruscanta - planet coruscant

Counting 5 words

Pronouns etc:

Gar - you, ni - I, mhi - we, sa - mine

Counting 4 words

Other:

Kyr - death, gai - name, solus - one/alone, tome - together, dar'tome - apart, haat - truth, evaar - new, ijaat - honor, haa'it - vision, kyr'tayl - know, darasuum - forever, jate - good, ori'jate - very good, ori'haat - promise, ni ceta - I kneel (an apology), nayc - no, elek - yes, nu draar - no way!/not possible, an - all, bar - and, dinui - share, tuur - day, var'tuur - morning (new day), shereshoy - lust for life, ne'tra gal - (a strong alcohol), tingilaar - (a spicy stew), tihaar - (an alcoholic beverage), shig - (a mandalorian spice tea), olarum - welcome, oya - let's go, cin - white, tra - black,

Counting 32 words

So unless I've counted wrong we're at 93 words. Not bad! Pretty close to my guess from a month ago, and I'm pretty sure I've forgotten some in the meantime (or just can't think of them right now, there are always some that I can translate when I see the English word but can't think of when making a list in one go), so it's actually more than I expected!

+ these phrases etc:

Haat' mando'ade/haat'ade - true Mandalorians (Jaster Mereel's fraction), evaar('mando)'ade - new mandalorians backed by the Republic led by the Kryze family, kyr'stad - deathwatch (terrorists)

Jate var'tuur - good morning, Gai bel Manda: Ni kyr'tayl gai sa'ad - adoption vow: I know your name as my child, riduruuk: mhi solus tome, mhi solus dar'tome, mi me'nidui an, mhi bajuri verde - marriage vows: we are one together, we are one apart, we share all, we will raise warriors, ni kar'tayl gar darasuum - I will now you forever (I love you)

I don't quite know this one yet: 'today is a good day for someone else to die', it's a saying for going into a battle, especially when it's for revenge

Thank you for the ask xD

Edit: yeah looking at my list from the last time I counted my vocab there are a bunch of really easy ones I've forgotten to list here

Me'ven - what, Me'vaar (ti gar) - anything new? (Hey, how's it going), Su'cuy gar/su'cuy - hi (still alive), Returce'mhi/ret - bye (let's meet again), mandokarla - has Mandalorian spirit, udeesi - calm (down), Cin vetin - blank slate (white fields), Nasaade - nameless/clanless, Dha'kad - darksaber, Dral'han - mandalorian excision, ven'alor - next in line to lead, ven'riduur - fiancé, Mesh'la - beautiful, Osik - Shit, Kute - Bodysuit, Naas - nothing/nope (I'm fine), jare'la - stupidly brave

So def over a hundred word mandalorian vocab, just from reading too much fic xD

Also I remember the words Koyaci and Kandosi but I don't remember what they mean??? Gotta look them up one of these days

[cinamun]

Now the Charlie slander is crazy!! Let's make one thing Clear that is very obvious Abt Dira cus I feel like y'all are underestimating her cus y'all don't like Charlie! Dira from what we see with this Tre guy knows when her limit is up and doesn't wanna deal with BS. She blocked him and exited his life and didn't let him back in for a period of time that he compares himself to someone being incarcerated. When she did let him back, he's following a set of rules of her boundaries. She obviously has a lot of power over her boundaries and gives less of a shit of someone's feelings if she has to block for her own good. If Charlie mentioning dating was that big of a deal to her... She would of blocked and left him already. But he's also a friend to her, seeing that they hang out casually and she's comfortable seeing his family at the vendors, and bringing him to a family function which then he gave her aunt confidence to propose to her girl, which is a big step for her emotionally, and they danced the night away. Dira keeps him around bc it seems she likes his company. And like Cin said, Dira wanted this Yorkie. If he went to go get it, it seems he knows Dira well on a personal level to get it and was happy she was happy. And let's remember during the photo set of the phonecall, when tre asked why he got blocked and such, Cin pointed out the scene then cut to Charlie sleeping. And idk Abt y'all.. but Cin doesn't do stuff just to be silly. That was intentional. Like idk!!! I don't think Charlie is evil for wanting a relationship. All he's doing rn is making joke like her coochie wants him to marry her. It ain't his fault her coochie shivers her timbers when he just talk! I fully believe if Dira feels uncomfortable, she would of blocked by now. She's shown us already she can. I wouldn't never underestimate her or her decision making!! If she seemingly is keeping him around, I'm assuming he's giving her a fun time and she's just rolling her eyes at his quips.

HOLD ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

Friend!!! I had to get tf up outta bed on this one and come directly over to the PC because

YOU BROKE THIS DOWN TO THE ATOMS!!! Y'all please read this, the homie left no stone unturned you hear me?????

*presents you with the Golden Hennessey bottle award for best filthy read of the fuckery*

[hyacinthstears]

Name: Hyacinth (Cin)

~●○°●○°●○~ Likes: Whump, Gore, Body horror, Horror in general, Torture, Hurt/no comfort, Character death, Recovery, Michelangelo-centric, abuse, found family, Gods/any story that features gods, space and stars, Fics based on songs, is/going crazy, anything featuring Mikey getting hurt in some way, Badass Mikey, Helpless Mikey.

Squicks: Sexual stuff, fics not featuring Mikey in someway (he's my fav), iteration basing.

Favorite Iteration(s): Rottmnt, tmnt 2012, IDW(haven't read all of that one yet) Tmnt 2003 (Haven't seen all of that one yet), MM/Tottmnt.

~●○°●○°●○~ Prompt #1 - Rottmnt Mikey meets Last Ronin Mikey. Prompt #2 - (Rottmnt movie) The Krang get Mikey instead of Raph and they find out about his mystic powers. Prompt #3 - A gore filled angst-fest with Donnie and Mikey from my "Leo's Descent" AU (Its not done but I want to see what people can do with what's on my tumblr so far) Prompt #4 - 2012 Mikey beats the heck out of his brothers without even really paying attention in a 1v3 cause none of they realized how cool and badass Mikey really is, not even Mikey. Prompt #5 - 2012 tmnt and Rottmnt have a crossover and they team up to beat (Insert bad guys here) but the fact the Rottmnt were made to be weapons of war set them apart and they end up scaring the 2012 boys (angst). ~●○°●○°●○~

[jessepinwheel]

tell us about all your obiclones?

all the obi-clones? but there's 2000 of them 🤔

nah, just kidding. the obi-clones are definitely main characters of parex, and we meet a good handful of them. this one is longer so I will tuck it under a read more

for quick background, all the obi-clones were raised in kamino. obi-wan taught them most of their morals and ways to use the force via psychic skype and also by possessing one of the obi-clones to teach them in a more hands-on manner, while mandalorian trainers taught the obi-clones stuff like speaking the language, combat, and technical skills. of course among these mandalorian trainers was cin drallig, a mandalorian jedi who was supposed to teach the obi-clones some stuff about the force, but obviously obi-wan's knowledge far outstrips cin's, and also cin was so depressed and lonely that a bunch of obi-clone children decided to make him feel better by forming a psychic connection with him that, uh, ended up absorbing him into their hive mind along with the entire contents of his brain. so if you want to be technical, he did teach them everything he knew about the force!

the obi-clones were created in batches of 100, numbered sequentially going from 0000 to 1999, but within each batch of 100 the ID number doesn't correspond to order in which they were decanted, so 0000 isn't necessarily the oldest out of the 0 batch. the obi-clones all have names, with the early batches were named by the mandalorians (and so tend to have mandalorian names) while later batches were named by obi-wan or the older obi-clones (and so do not have mandalorian names)

while I'm going to refer to all the obi-clones as 'he', they're gender neutral by default because they didn't really inherit any kind of gender identity from obi-wan, who is very apathetic about his own gender identity. some obi-clones do end up identifying specifically as male or female or something else as time goes on (especially after they absorbed cin into the hive mind and learned about the concept of being male), but that's kind of beyond the scope of what parex is actually about, which is kicking jango's ass for being the worst father of all time and destroying the mandalorian empire

all obi-clones have been made to wear collars pretty much from birth. the collars are different from the mandalorian jedi ranking collars in that they are made specifically to control the obi-clones--they track the obi-clones vitals, with visible light pips on the outside that are synced with their heartbeat and which change color when they're using the force, and they are fitted with electroshock and location tracking capabilities. the only way to remove a collar is with a special device, or by cutting through it with a lightsaber. the obi-clone uniform is all white, and includes a tunic, surcoat, and full-face mask much in the style of old jedi temple guards. customizing the uniform isn't something that the obi-clones do very much, because physical individuality isn't really something they value, all being part of a psychic hive mind and everything. they do sometimes customize the masks, though, and each obi-clone has their own preferences of whether they like wearing the mask. they're not required to wear the mask at all times though because the mandalorian trainers were creeped the fuck out by a bunch of kids wearing faceless masks.

also for the purposes of parex, obi-wan and his clones are played by toshiro mifune but with lighter hair because I said so.

moving on to the obi-clones themselves...

the first obi-clone we meet is Kote (#0066). he was chosen by jango, possibly because of his name, which as most people reading this know means 'glory'. as part of the 0 batch, he has a strong sense of self and is seen as a sort of leader within the obi-clones. he's very competent and very good at keeping his emotions under control, which is good because if he didn't he would have murdered jango so many times. kote acts as jango's personal aide, with increasing duties as time goes on, until he's helping jango don his armor, sparring with him, advising on imperial affairs, and becoming all but the emperor consort. of all the obi-clones, kote is the only one who sees obi-wan in person and is able to confirm that obi-wan is a real person who is still alive. which is great except for the fact that obi-wan is in jango's torture basement after 11 years of solitary confinement and torture and looks like shit. kote is so angry at jango for the entirety of this story that kicking jango's ass on live television is probably the best day of his life. after the coup he changes his name to Six

the next clone we meet is Kenobi (#0212). his actual name is gratika, which means 'little revenge' and he hates that name, so he tells everyone else to call him Kenobi, while his brothers refer to him as Ori. kenobi is assigned to cody's squad, which is specifically a jedi hunting special forces team. kenobi is one of the most proficient force users of all his brothers, and he wears his hair in a braid that goes down across the scalp behind his right ear--because he's heard of jedi padawans and the braids they used to wear, but the practice died after the mandalorians destroyed the jedi and he doesn't actually know what the braid is supposed to look like. kenobi is polite, but at the core he's ruthless and a bit mean. he ends up forcibly absorbing ventress into the obi-collective to stop her from leaking information and destroying at least one other person's mind. cody ends up infatuated with him because kenobi offers emotional support that cody needs so badly it's not even funny but kenobi isn't even a little bit interested in cody

after that is Surau (#0501). his name means 'light eyes', so named because he has a mutation which gives him gold eyes. he is assigned to rex, probably because jango is an asshole and thinks it would be funny to remind rex of that time anakin went full darkside and rex had to put him down. surau is mild-tempered and diligent, but rex hates interacting with him because rex has huge hangups about both jedi and clones. rex's squad is mostly law enforcement and suppression of rebellion forces, so surau ends up incidentally coming into contact with multiple rebel forces, who see his gold eyes and are like uhhh is he evil? do we need to worry about that?

next on the list is Azar (#916). here we get into the clones that don't have mandalorian names. azar is assigned to work under ursa wren, whose squad also includes padme and ahsoka, which is primarily an intimidation and enforcement squad to keep citizens in line. azar is probably the most obi-wan of the obi-clones, with a tendency towards teaching and watching over others. he ends up being a sort of mentor figure to ahsoka, helping her through her anger issues and teaching her things like mindfulness and how maybe murder is bad, actually. this leads to a huge clusterfuck where azar has to fucking book it and is on the run from the empire with a literal tracking beacon attached to his neck. this does not end well for him.

then we have Ben (#1555). sometimes called fives by his brothers, he is assigned to the kryzes to effectively monitor them (and death watch, who hate jango's guts) for rebellious activity. he's got more of a soft personality, and doesn't really like confrontation. for some reason satine really likes the look of ben and dresses him up and takes him out to parties, which ben finds extremely uncomfortable, while bo-katan hates the fact that satine is getting sweet on a clone. he spends time around mandalorian high society and generally gets treated like shit or like a pet, because clones are not really thought of as people, since most of them are just purchased to be on standby as spare parts and are chipped or otherwise lobotomized. anyways, ben snoops around and overhears the fact that death watch does, in fact, have a plan to murder jango and obliterate all of keldabe, and he gets found out and murdered by bo-katan for it

which leads us to Ira (#1565), who is brought in as ben's replacement after ben was 'killed by an unknown attacker' but which ira knows is bullshit because he is in the hivemind and saw bo-katan strangle ben to death. ira is forced by bo-katan to pretend he is ben, and satine doesn't even notice that he's a different clone. ira and ben were very close brothers, so ira is very angry about this whole situation and he is just biding his time so that he can turn bo-katan and satine against each other

then we have our last main obi-clone, which is Boga (#1977). as one of the youngest clones, he really doesn't have a very strong sense of self or individuality, instead deferring heavily to the collective consciousness. he's assigned to pre viszla, who is leading a bunch of soldiers who are basically cleaning up at the end of mandalore's successful conquest of zygerria. he ends up befriending another soldier, who turns out to be fox, the third jango clone (after cody and rex) who has been brainwashed into oblivion and is being used as a soldier and on standby as spare parts. boga stands up to pre about how he treats fox like shit, and pre ends sending boga off a cliff. boga, however, is able to send out a psychic distress call and is rescued by the jedi order, which allows the obi-collective to finally touch base with the jedi and coordinate their efforts

there are of course many other obi-clones. the ones who aren't deployed across the military are stationed in keldabe to work with myles and dooku as intelligence officers, and also cin ends up adopting one of the obi-clones as his son, who helps him manage his disability and also keeps him psychic connected to the hive mind

at the start of the story, about 1800 of the clones are alive, with the remainder being killed in kamino mostly from unethical research into force suppression methods, and by the end of the story about 1000 of the clones are still alive, with many having been killed by neglectful or malicious squads, or during the coup where they do a mass assassination of major mandalorian commanders and leaders and the mandalorians are not really into that for some reason

there are a lot of characters in parex :)

ask me questions about parasitic extraction, the role reversal mandalorian empire au that I have

[ratgirlexe]

I guess I make things now, so I guess I’m also allowed to do a little year in retrospect thingy!

This last year is the year I started creating. On the first of February I decided to start trying to make video games, after playing Pseudoregalia. By valentines I had made my first game, a cute little CYOA game that I made for my girlfriend in preparation for a trip to see her. It was silly and cute and small and is the best thing I’ve ever made. I love that game.

Then, I made a little shmup game, mostly as a prototype for a much larger project that I’ve since put on hold until I have more coding experience. It was fun to put together, but it’s very much just a tester project. What’s most important is that it’s finished, and took me only 6 days! I’m proud of it just for that fact alone.

Fast forward a month and I met my lovely partner, who introduced me to Coquette Dragoon. After playing it I really wanted to create something for it because I loved the world and characters so much, so I actually wrote my first bit of fanfiction. It was messy and is still unfinished, but without that writing I never would have had the confidence to write anything for HDG, Or a truly story based game. I love Terra and the Pilot, and it’s a story I’ll probably keep coming back to off and on when I want to write a cute little girl having a really *really* bad time.

After that a lot of life stuff started getting in the way and I moved to much longer projects. Namely 3000 Cycles With You, an ongoing project that I’ll likely be working on well into this upcoming year, and a smattering of HDG fics, most notably Myosotis, and an unnamed and as-of-yet unpublished plushification fic set in the HDG universe. While I’ve definitely gotten a bit mired in these longer projects, it’s been amazing having these big projects to really sink my teeth into and explore. When I first started writing HDG I never could have imagined what Cin and Sepheri and the gang would have ended up meaning to me, and I’m so so so glad that I took the plunge to start writing longer form projects. Myosotis is the longest thing I’ve ever written, and while I definitely would have chosen to write some of it differently in hindsight, I’m proud of how it’s turning out, and I’m proud of myself for writing it.

As for 3000CWY, I cannot *wait* to get a playable demo into people’s hands. I love making video games so much, and while writing is my passion, I think game dev will always be the central hobby I keep coming back to.

Ultimately I’m really excited for where this upcoming year will take me, and I’m proud of where this last year has carried me creatively speaking. Even as it’s been a really tough year for me interpersonally (my current living situation has left me exceedingly isolated socially) it’s been the best year of my life for creating and having hobbies, and I’m proud of that fact.

Lastly, thank you to everyone who has supported me this last year, whether that’s liking my posts about HDG, or leaving nice comments on Myosotis, or giving me feedback about my games! I’m so grateful to have people who even care about the things I make, and without that feedback it would be a lot harder to stay motivated to create. I’m extra grateful for all my friends who have playtested and beta-read things for me, without which I think the things I’ve made would have a lot less flavour. I love you all. <3

[kayskardkingdom]

alright like i said i would lets do the big intro thing

heya im Cinderella or Cin but i also go by Brick, Mock, Cici, Kay (something new lol), Noelle, Lucy- the point is i have a lot of names lol call me whatever you want ill probably end up liking it and adopting it as my own

i don’t really have a flair for the dramatic like my friends on here seem to have so don’t expect like super fancy high quality posts about stuff i love im relatively blunt as well so if i end up crossing wires or hurting feelings much apologies its just how i am i try and tone it down sometimes :)

The fandoms im into is like wildly varied but the main ones you’ll find here are:

Percy Jackson

Undertale (and Undertale Yellow but i leave that more up to spencer)

Helluva Boss (less so Hazbin cuz eh)

My Hero Academia

Deltarune

TADC

Dungeons and Dragons

Now for my actual interests outside of pop culture cuz i got a couple of those too:

The process of writing and creating art (im not an artist myself but i personally thing its a super cool skill to have loll)

Movie-making and filming

Rigging and animation

Music and singing (i suck haha)

lets do the social listy things!

i dont own this discord but im a co-owner and we need more people so WHY NOT LETS DO IT: https://discord.gg/G2gGjkbT

I don’t have a personal twitter because why would i go on twitter???

I got a blusky though (its for my vtuber stuff heheheheheheheheehheheeheh): https://bsky.app/profile/cincon01.bsky.social

i also run Ask!Soulstale with a couple friends so go check that out if you can it’d be much appreciated: https://www.tumblr.com/soulstaleask/758700021803876352/welcome-to-asksoulstale

Moving on

smore fun facts for you particularly nosy mfs cuz i need an ego inflation for the day (no i dont its big enough):

swear words flow from me like water

im a trans girl i prolly dont pass but honestly i dont give a damn suck a dick im a girl 🗣️🔥

im a cowboy baby yee haw (im texan)

i love me a good history fact every once in a while

i sleep a lot

thats about it thanks for reading or if you just scrolled down to the end good on you for being lazy im proud of you

aubergine btw

[cin425]

Had to be fair and point out that Kakeru also has crazy romantic thoughts about Haiji

[denniswilsonzine]

Made a thing - anyone want a sampler/test print preview copy of the zine?

Sent some stuff off to mixam (UK) to see how they looked like in print versus just being on my screen, mostly came out really good. One of only three copies to exist - ordered one test zine & they sent me two extra copies. Got one copy plus some promo merch on ebay right now ... * eta: somebody incredibly cool actually bought it omg squee

[and an almost identical copy is on ko-fi or available to trade. *** message me if you're interested in trading **** ]

*(sorry this took a ridiculously long time for me to finish writing and uploading all the images thanks to exhaustion & shitty internet - the ebay copy'll probably have sold by the time you see this post / it escapes being stuck in drafts, and I still haven't added image descriptions.)

...with not quite world wide postage via ebay's Global Shipping Programme, I'm keeping the best quality one & was thinking of doing a giveaway of the other* when I finally write the review of mixam's print quality I promised months ago, unless anyone wants to trade? - fake edit: *scratch that, copy #2 of #3 is now up in my ko-fi shop & I'll probably stick it on etsy, now I've seen people are actually interested in the ebay copy.(eta: somebody incredibly cool actually bought it omg squee)

https://ko-fi.com/s/483109b440 *** message me if you want to trade **** copy #2 has the same content as #3 shown below, just slightly different margin/bleed printing & Copy #2 of #3 written on the front cover. - it's 44 pages of a couple of articles and extracts of bits of issues 1 & two plus spreads from possible future issues (mostly graphics) inc. rough drafts etc.

Thoughts Of You a Dennis Wilson fanzine Mixam Zine test print no #1 Sept Nov 2023 Stapled, bleed recycled silk 130 GSM 44 pages #1 of 1 #3 of 3 by Jenna Appleseed (me)

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/226162925472 includes coverage of virtual zine fests, inc KC Zine Con; earlier issue's cover art; collages by Valarie Simadis; zine promo; being featured on De_ziners instagram; Dennis performing Angel Come Home on The Midnight Special; a Dennis t-shirt, a Dennis song recommendation from The Horrors & tributes and art by Gino Dal Cin. Some of this is reprinted from pdf issues 1 & 2 and/or going to reappear in a proper print issue/future digital zine, revised/updated or with a better layout.

Colours are richer in print than they look in the photos. (it's impossible to get decent photos without glare or off colours) Promo stuff:

sticker is a 10cm x 3.3cm vinyl sticker showing the fanzine logo/header with a white border. (done with a stickermule discount before I realised they were as dodgy as fuck, sorry.)

Business cards are printed by Moo on card made from recycled cotton t-shirts & have three different designs on the front & fanzine info on the back.

Designs are: the zine logo, issue one's front cover, and a photo of a silver heart trinket engraved with Forever.

Three million photos showing all pages incoming, click keep reading to see them: One or two pics are NSFW for swearing

10 page feature from issue 2 about virtual zine fests inc. KC Zine Con & zine merch. (lots of trash pandas reading zines).

Two variations of a layout with a song recommendation from The Horrors, one'll end up in a zine when I work out which looks best. (background taken from the cover art for their album Skying)

A couple of Dennis image edits/layer blends & layout I designed. (these'll probably eventually appear in a proper finished zine)

Collages by Valarie Simadis from pdf issue 2. (background added by me from a stock illustration).

Zine links page & call for submissions /promo art - also from digital issue 2.

Two page feature on being featured on De_ziners instagram (from pdf issue 2)

Preview of a double page spread layout/graphic design/digital art/image editing for a future zine feature / themed issue on Dennis singing Angel Come Home on The Midnight Special.

Another couple of pages with added swearing - just need to make the text make sense and write the bloody rest of it.

Another double page spread layout design with a pull quote and a digital collage/image manipulation of Dennis singing Angel Come Home.

Page layout design experiments for Pacific Ocean Blue & Bambu that may eventually appear in a zine.

Double page spread of my photo of Dennis & Venice Surf (Dennis tee's from Bathroom Wall & Venice Surf tee was from Pep & Co at Poundland) - extract from an unofficial t-shirts feature in pdf issue 1.

Two different heart themed page designs from two different features in pdf issue 1.

A couple of digital collages/image manipulations based around Dennis' performance of Angel Come Home on The Midnight Special + lyrics from the Manic Street Preachers song You're Tender & Your Tired, that just seemed to fit so fucking well.) Probably need to rework/improve one of them if/before including in an actual issue.

Double page spread with a quote on the song + a screenshot of Dennis from youtube. (needs a little bit of tweaking before it's ready for a finished zine)

Sample credits page from issue one about Forever inspired art by Gino Dal Cin, & a sarcastic fanzine promo graphic I made.

Two versions of the same page so I could see how much of a difference the image resolution actually makes (remade the second one from the original photo - the higher res really does make it look better quality when printed) - the dpi notes won't be on the finished version (fucked up and had to replace a page in the files I'm sending to mixam to print a real physical issue one of the zine cos I got so used to having the dpi note over a lower res graphic I accidentally forgot it wasn't permanently meant to be there).

So i'm goin' away but not forever"

Back cover art by Gino Dal Cin, blue & silver (& pink) star background from a scrapbooking site.

[lace-sutures]

Hey!! This is just a message to all of the people on your blog…..

LISTEN UP SHITHEADS. Cin is being nice enough to accept requests from you guys. She’s taking the time out of her day to draw stuff for you guys FOR FREE. She’s not getting any payback for her labor except for a few compliments and internet attention. No money. No treats. No nothing. The least you guys can do is respect her and read her boundaries. If you aren’t going to respect her then you don’t deserve to get free art in the first place. Spamming her with requests isn’t going to change her mind if you’re requesting something she already stated she wasn’t going to draw. All you’re getting yourself is a big wide opportunity for her to block you.

Respect my little sister. I don’t care if you hate on me for being a rude, harsh bastard. I will not tolerate anyone being an asshole to her.

thank u sm bro.. i really hate blocking people but i literally have no choice when ppl keep like !!! bothering me!!!!???

i dont want to have to stop taking requests altogether but it doesnt take that long to just click the 'keep reading' and skim the top few words!!!

thank you to everyone who does read it i appreciate u guys sm and im hugging u (if thats ok if not then im fist bumping u)

[cinwritesbirth]

hello cin may I ask when will you start posting stuff again I missed reading your posts and I'm glad you're back!

you absolutely may! i've gotten a couple asks like this but thank you anon, for being the only one to come at me like a human being

so, shortly after i announced my return here, my job shut down and everyone was laid off with literally no warning. understandably, my focus has been on keeping the lights on. i considered maybe opening commissions here but i was in nowhere near the right headspace for it. i have a new job potentially lined up, so i'm hoping that i'll be back to writing here sometime in the next few weeks. thanks for ya'lls patience in the meantime.

[ragnar0c]

a funny confession before i forget:

there was a period when you were talking about Cinnabar on your blog in anticipation of Full Mettle, and for some reason i thought you were referring to Shinsha from Land of the Lustrous all of a sudden ToT

you: i love cinnabar

me: oh shinsha? i love shinsha too :DD!

semi-related to that though, full mettle was really cool and inspiring! the concept of an alchemist/gunner is a very *click* moment, especially with the elemental rounds.

gabieta also having a mutable presentation (like when she immediately switches in her tone between the boss and cinnabar, it’s a little bit like a jump scare) herself helps the vibe too :0! kind of like the flow of water or a gust of wind that has to blow its course. like how cinnabar will eventually get to the place she is in EO2!

this has become lengthy, my apologies ToT but i hope this brightens your day, even by a little bit!

I had a friend who was into Land of the Lustrous! I still have to read it, but it’s interesting that they chose Cinnabar (Shinsha) for a gem since it can produce mercury,, This made me read about them a bit and Shinsha and Cin have stuff in common heheheh.

I named Cinnabar, well, Cinnabar bc the stone’s association with Chinese alchemy and bc it makes mercury too. Mercury is one of the principles, the tría prima, of the branch of alchemy I based my story off of. It’s the principle of the mind, and it’s known for being flexible like a mix of the other two which represent body and spirit. Cinnabar plays a similar role in my head!

Each of their guild mates kind of reference this too, except Kenji.

Gabieta’s name has to do with fire, which is derived from the principle of sulfur,, the “spirit”— what skews Cinnabar to pursue alchemy. I’m glad you liked Full Mettle, even the title is a reference that (Mettle’s a synonym for spirited. Cinnabar is fully spirited, her mettle grows ❤️)

Don’t worry about the length, this literally made my day 🥹 Very excited to write the salt principle, the “body”. And how it grounds Cinnabar!!

[cinamun]

Cinnnn - me catchin' up on your whole legacy from the bloody beginnin' Holy moly, this story is a rollercoaster of a million emotions. So you might have seen me likin' like a queen each post. 😂 Damn, I have to admit this is by far one of the more intriguing stories I've read so far. Let me tell ya' what I love the most. Those exchanges between Indya and you? I simply can't! 🤣 Morti and Bella? With their summaries and conclusions? I'm dead, and I love this. Now, guess what? I just finished the first ACT. Geez, I always knew that if at all? Sean would be the one who would move first and kiss our girl. Welp, the finale at the end of Act One was to be expected. It's still insane and crazy, tho! I want a family! Indya: That's nice! Like Guuurl, did you hear what he said? 😁 I mean, I know they will have a junior later on. Yeah, well! You pop up with the latest posts on my dash, ha😆! So I know what I know🙈! But damn, the end is so sad. 😔

Now, I need to finish Act Two.😏 I'm sure I will continue to laugh, feel mad, roll my eyes, and shake my head about their actions. Don't worry! Once I'm up to date? I will start to spam you with my thoughts and comments. Will be back after Act Two. Until then, I'll spam you only with my likes and hearts😂. So please enjoy the ride with me🥺. I'm not able to comment. If I start to comment now - it will take me forever to finish your legacy. And I want to spam ya with the latest stuff, hehe! Thank you so much for your entertaining storytelling skills, Cin! You are wonderful! Keep rockin, gur! 🤗

The many faces I had while reading your story ⬇🤣

Me watching every notification from you during Act 1

It was WILD back then!!! A MADHOUSE!!! And for all of the reasons you mentioned I cringe a little but then remember what it was like hitting those arcs and the highs and the lows and the way Indya used to curse me out. She and I have a better relationship now so....

I am SO GLAD you're on this ride friend and thank you for the kind words. I always wonder what folks are thinking when they reach a certain point in this, the story that never ends. I will never forget what it was like to write it and see all the reactions come rolling in!

Enjoy Act 2 friend but keep your seatbelt on because ..... reasons. LMFAO

Shout out to the homie @ashubii who is working their way through Act 1 right behind you LOL! I swear I love y'all.

[braveandsnipe]

punkjack wasn’t supposed to die…??

i was reading this thread on twt where this person was questioning why so many characters were brought back (win, girori, daichi, and kanato) and one of the comments mentioned “win wasn’t supposed to die” and after reading a bit more the reason he was away for a bit was because of his actor was working on another project at the time.

i honestly wonder whether they would have made him more of a “main character” (like on a similar level as the core 4) had he not had to be written out. i mean.. it’s not like he did much when he came back (except get beat up), but maybe they would’ve done more had they had the time. and it’s not like there wasn’t anything for him, they could’ve done more stuff with the bts of the dgp.

this could also explain why he was the only character that wasn’t part of the core 4 to get a special buckle. that always bothered me lol.

idk, the more i learn about this character, the more confused i get about the intentions of his creation haha.

[awkward transition]

also in that thread, someone mentioned a punkjack v-cinema and if ex-aid can have a shitty v-cin trilogy, i think we can make a punkjack v-cin.